1 00:00:00,551 --> 00:00:02,928 Previously on "Pushing Daisies"... 2 00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:05,347 Young Ned had a special gift. 3 00:00:05,639 --> 00:00:09,101 He could touch dead things and bring them back to life. 4 00:00:09,193 --> 00:00:12,366 But he could only bring the dead back to life for one minute. 5 00:00:12,396 --> 00:00:14,774 Any longer and someone else had to die. 6 00:00:15,066 --> 00:00:17,046 And there was one more thing he had to learn -- 7 00:00:17,076 --> 00:00:18,652 First touch, life. 8 00:00:18,944 --> 00:00:21,697 Second touch, dead again forever. 9 00:00:21,789 --> 00:00:23,995 But as young Ned grew into the pie maker, 10 00:00:24,028 --> 00:00:26,320 this gift proved to be most useful 11 00:00:26,413 --> 00:00:29,192 in the untimely death of his childhood sweetheart, 12 00:00:29,225 --> 00:00:30,899 - Charlotte Charles. - Are you in love with her? 13 00:00:30,925 --> 00:00:32,378 - You only got a minute. - I know. 14 00:00:32,409 --> 00:00:33,630 - 60 seconds. - I know. 15 00:00:33,705 --> 00:00:35,453 What if you didn't have to be dead? 16 00:00:35,586 --> 00:00:36,532 You can't touch me. 17 00:00:36,758 --> 00:00:38,402 So a kiss is out of the question? 18 00:00:38,508 --> 00:00:40,220 You touch murder victims, you ask who killed them. 19 00:00:40,256 --> 00:00:42,102 You touch them again, they go back to being dead, 20 00:00:42,138 --> 00:00:43,732 and then you collect the reward? 21 00:00:43,765 --> 00:00:45,173 That's it in a nutshell. 22 00:00:48,146 --> 00:00:49,850 You saved me! 23 00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:53,141 It was a friendly expression of innocent gratitude. 24 00:00:54,418 --> 00:00:57,233 - What's gotten into you? - What's gotten into you? 25 00:01:03,615 --> 00:01:06,533 Season 1, Episode 7 - Smell of Success For www.forom.com 26 00:01:09,455 --> 00:01:12,703 At this very moment, at the Longborough School for boys, 27 00:01:12,957 --> 00:01:15,413 young Ned was 9 years, 41 weeks, 28 00:01:15,457 --> 00:01:19,881 14 hours, and 3 minutes old and exhausted... 29 00:01:20,428 --> 00:01:22,800 For despite the endless waking hours 30 00:01:22,917 --> 00:01:25,963 spent assuring himself that his heart was on the mend, 31 00:01:26,008 --> 00:01:28,430 Ned discovered the truth in his sleep. 32 00:01:30,098 --> 00:01:33,142 Sadly, not a single night had passed 33 00:01:33,236 --> 00:01:35,113 since the death of his mother 34 00:01:35,145 --> 00:01:38,443 that he didn't dream of her coming back to him. 35 00:01:43,947 --> 00:01:47,243 Realizing he couldn't rush his heart into healing, 36 00:01:47,538 --> 00:01:49,160 he concocted a plan... 37 00:01:55,665 --> 00:01:57,623 To reconnect with his mother 38 00:01:58,085 --> 00:02:00,123 in a way that only he could. 39 00:02:02,595 --> 00:02:05,883 For young Ned wasn't like the other children 40 00:02:06,137 --> 00:02:08,553 or the other adults, for that matter, 41 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:11,221 which, in this case, delighted him... 42 00:02:11,296 --> 00:02:13,010 briefly. 43 00:02:14,438 --> 00:02:17,171 Although young Ned knew he couldn't taste the pie, 44 00:02:17,205 --> 00:02:19,023 lest the fruit rot again, 45 00:02:19,357 --> 00:02:20,983 he didn't care. 46 00:02:22,278 --> 00:02:25,110 The mere smell of it made him feel, 47 00:02:25,157 --> 00:02:29,033 if only for an hour, exactly like he wanted to feel -- 48 00:02:29,325 --> 00:02:32,663 safe and warm and loved -- 49 00:02:32,957 --> 00:02:34,623 Which is why he became... 50 00:02:35,836 --> 00:02:37,240 the pie maker... 51 00:02:39,256 --> 00:02:40,853 who, at this very moment, 52 00:02:41,218 --> 00:02:43,303 was planting flowers to make Chuck feel 53 00:02:43,335 --> 00:02:47,590 as safe and warm and loved as he once did. 54 00:02:47,925 --> 00:02:50,260 - Sue bee. - Who bee? 55 00:02:50,555 --> 00:02:52,002 I'm referring to the honey -- 56 00:02:52,016 --> 00:02:53,180 The store-bought kind, 57 00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:56,062 the kind I will purchase by the gallon for you. 58 00:02:56,117 --> 00:02:58,431 Honey you don't work for is never as sweet. 59 00:02:59,185 --> 00:03:01,853 Oh, look. There's a fantastic rooftop 60 00:03:02,145 --> 00:03:03,892 for the honey-harvesting expansion. 61 00:03:04,067 --> 00:03:06,013 Let's not plant flowers way over there. 62 00:03:06,236 --> 00:03:09,003 - You don't even know which building. - I know it's not this one. 63 00:03:09,035 --> 00:03:11,902 And in the interest of operation urban honey pioneer, 64 00:03:12,247 --> 00:03:14,593 I think we should keep the operation contained. 65 00:03:14,745 --> 00:03:16,960 - Comfortably contained. - Comfortable in a good way, 66 00:03:16,996 --> 00:03:19,542 like it's usually used. I'm concerned for the bees. 67 00:03:19,755 --> 00:03:22,511 We should keep the flowers close so they will feel safe. 68 00:03:22,547 --> 00:03:24,991 Actually, bees have an incredible sense of smell. 69 00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:27,310 So if we keep doing our job and planting the flowers, 70 00:03:27,345 --> 00:03:29,141 the bees will do theirs and find them. 71 00:03:29,175 --> 00:03:31,021 Why do we need so much honey, anyway? 72 00:03:31,056 --> 00:03:32,380 It's a surprise. 73 00:03:32,425 --> 00:03:34,561 "Surprise" has never been a very good word for me. 74 00:03:34,597 --> 00:03:35,943 Well, you'll like this one. 75 00:03:36,187 --> 00:03:37,162 And just so you know, 76 00:03:37,196 --> 00:03:39,602 the honeybee has to visit hundreds of blossoms 77 00:03:39,938 --> 00:03:41,970 before it has enough nectar to take back to the hive, 78 00:03:42,007 --> 00:03:44,851 so the more flowers, the merrier the bees. 79 00:03:47,776 --> 00:03:49,861 A brokenhearted Olive Snook 80 00:03:50,007 --> 00:03:53,831 found herself navigating a minefield of her own making. 81 00:03:54,617 --> 00:03:56,451 This is what it is, isn't it? 82 00:03:56,746 --> 00:03:59,703 Unless that's not a rolling pin under your apron. 83 00:04:03,166 --> 00:04:04,372 Sorry. 84 00:04:05,216 --> 00:04:06,961 Isn't it great we can joke? 85 00:04:07,295 --> 00:04:09,023 Now that we know there's nothing going on 86 00:04:09,055 --> 00:04:11,151 between us and never was, it can be funny. 87 00:04:11,307 --> 00:04:13,052 I bet this sort of thing happens all the time 88 00:04:13,085 --> 00:04:15,081 between adults. Mixed romantic messages. 89 00:04:15,136 --> 00:04:16,411 In no time, we'll be looking back 90 00:04:16,448 --> 00:04:18,191 and laughing till we wet the rug... 91 00:04:18,355 --> 00:04:19,901 Which we'll then want to shampoo. 92 00:04:19,937 --> 00:04:21,481 A couple times, possibly three, 93 00:04:21,567 --> 00:04:23,463 depending on what we've been drinking. 94 00:04:25,988 --> 00:04:27,812 Maybe I should wear a bell. 95 00:04:28,197 --> 00:04:30,090 - Actually -- - I'm not wearing a bell. 96 00:04:30,786 --> 00:04:33,331 Chuck continued to keep the secret ingredient 97 00:04:33,366 --> 00:04:34,861 of her pies secret. 98 00:04:35,206 --> 00:04:38,132 Not even Olive Snook knew the baked goods she delivered 99 00:04:38,168 --> 00:04:40,310 contained homeopathic mood enhancers 100 00:04:40,535 --> 00:04:43,452 meant to pry Chuck's aunts out of their funk. 101 00:04:43,546 --> 00:04:46,293 So, have they been in a good mood? My aunts? 102 00:04:46,546 --> 00:04:48,743 No, that's plural, and not all of them good. 103 00:04:48,928 --> 00:04:51,003 Okay. Maybe it's time to go to phase two. 104 00:04:51,308 --> 00:04:53,401 Have we been in phase one this whole time? 105 00:04:53,677 --> 00:04:55,220 How many phases are there? 106 00:04:55,516 --> 00:04:57,310 Four that I know of, but maybe five. 107 00:04:57,436 --> 00:04:58,930 Right now, we're at phase two, 108 00:04:59,015 --> 00:05:01,113 which means we need to get them back in the water. 109 00:05:01,148 --> 00:05:02,440 It's like oxygen for them. 110 00:05:02,688 --> 00:05:04,280 Because they're former mermaids. 111 00:05:04,488 --> 00:05:06,411 Only professionally, not mythologically speaking. 112 00:05:06,445 --> 00:05:08,243 Oh, I know all about their mermaidness. 113 00:05:08,277 --> 00:05:10,111 What are these? Cupcake pans? 114 00:05:10,407 --> 00:05:11,773 Surprise. 115 00:05:13,367 --> 00:05:15,991 It's the pie hole, not the cupcake hole. 116 00:05:16,025 --> 00:05:17,972 But it's not a cupcake. It's a cup-pie. 117 00:05:18,287 --> 00:05:19,842 A single-serve pie with honey -- 118 00:05:19,875 --> 00:05:21,520 my honey -- baked into the crust. 119 00:05:21,705 --> 00:05:22,790 And since it's still a pie, 120 00:05:22,828 --> 00:05:25,013 it could be served in the pie hole, by definition. 121 00:05:25,047 --> 00:05:26,762 I'm a purist. I like that we only serve 122 00:05:26,797 --> 00:05:29,542 traditional pies in the pie hole, not these hybrids. 123 00:05:29,797 --> 00:05:31,760 You know, you could do with loosening up a bit. 124 00:05:31,797 --> 00:05:33,812 I don't do loose. I prefer tightly wound. 125 00:05:33,847 --> 00:05:36,050 Not shapeless with extra room for surprises. 126 00:05:36,346 --> 00:05:37,932 I was a surprise. 127 00:05:38,516 --> 00:05:41,932 - You made room for me. Some. - Yeah, I made room. 128 00:05:42,225 --> 00:05:45,353 A whole rooftop full of room for you and your bees. 129 00:05:45,608 --> 00:05:47,060 I know, and I love it. 130 00:05:47,445 --> 00:05:49,443 I'm not Quasimodo in the bell tower. 131 00:05:49,587 --> 00:05:51,153 Quasimodo would have been a lot better off 132 00:05:51,185 --> 00:05:53,283 if he stayed in his bell tower where it was safe 133 00:05:53,317 --> 00:05:54,811 and comfortable, and he had his bell. 134 00:05:54,846 --> 00:05:56,620 I'm not sure Quasimodo would agree with that. 135 00:05:56,706 --> 00:05:57,802 Quasi wanted adventure. 136 00:05:57,807 --> 00:05:59,180 Quasi wanted to see the world. 137 00:05:59,215 --> 00:06:01,372 Quasi wanted cup-pies. 138 00:06:02,957 --> 00:06:05,331 Private investigator Emerson Cod 139 00:06:05,408 --> 00:06:08,583 was enjoying the latest issue of Knit Wit magazine, 140 00:06:08,968 --> 00:06:11,460 his literary outlet for knitting humor, 141 00:06:11,836 --> 00:06:14,431 when he received a phone call from the mother 142 00:06:14,598 --> 00:06:16,261 of one Anita Gray. 143 00:06:18,596 --> 00:06:20,090 The facts were these -- 144 00:06:20,473 --> 00:06:23,642 Anita Gray -- 22 years, 11 weeks, 2 days, 145 00:06:24,015 --> 00:06:26,149 9 hours, and 33 minutes old -- 146 00:06:26,175 --> 00:06:29,528 was taking a private tutorial in olfactory science 147 00:06:29,599 --> 00:06:31,942 when she experienced an epiphany. 148 00:06:32,356 --> 00:06:35,110 And the epiphany was that her instructor, 149 00:06:35,208 --> 00:06:37,942 Napoleon Lenez, was a genius. 150 00:06:38,287 --> 00:06:40,361 It was an epiphany Napoleon Lenez 151 00:06:40,446 --> 00:06:44,122 had himself experienced many, many years earlier. 152 00:06:44,538 --> 00:06:48,080 He showed her how olfactory cues could trigger memories, 153 00:06:48,376 --> 00:06:51,081 release floods of endorphins and pheromones, 154 00:06:51,427 --> 00:06:54,633 and cause biological and psychological reactions 155 00:06:55,007 --> 00:06:58,673 that deeply impacted the way people behave and feel. 156 00:06:59,635 --> 00:07:02,133 Using the smell of unfiltered cigarettes 157 00:07:02,217 --> 00:07:04,933 to evoke fond memories of her grandmother, 158 00:07:05,026 --> 00:07:08,471 he opened her eyes and heart through her nose. 159 00:07:12,446 --> 00:07:16,400 So she devoted her life to his work. 160 00:07:16,696 --> 00:07:19,072 With his new apprentice, Anita, by his side, 161 00:07:19,107 --> 00:07:21,612 Lenez created a self-help guide for those 162 00:07:21,707 --> 00:07:24,101 who wished to not only harness their past 163 00:07:24,287 --> 00:07:26,453 but to inspire and mold their future 164 00:07:26,707 --> 00:07:28,491 via the power of smell. 165 00:07:28,835 --> 00:07:31,180 Anita didn't live to see the book published. 166 00:07:31,216 --> 00:07:32,672 While working alone, 167 00:07:32,745 --> 00:07:36,313 she was killed by a mysterious explosion in Lenez's lab. 168 00:07:37,347 --> 00:07:39,633 Exactly what caused that explosion 169 00:07:40,017 --> 00:07:43,883 seemed to be a question only Anita Gray could answer. 170 00:07:46,437 --> 00:07:47,763 That is pungent. 171 00:07:48,108 --> 00:07:50,762 Pungent like fried chicken grilled on a bed of hair. 172 00:07:50,815 --> 00:07:52,273 What you waiting on? 173 00:07:57,697 --> 00:07:59,532 - Who's smoking? - You. 174 00:07:59,985 --> 00:08:01,571 Oh, how rude of me. 175 00:08:01,826 --> 00:08:03,070 I'm dreadfully sorry. 176 00:08:03,368 --> 00:08:05,061 This can't be good for your lungs. 177 00:08:05,076 --> 00:08:07,843 Anita, you have less than a minute to impart any last words. 178 00:08:07,877 --> 00:08:09,763 On the subject of what caused that explosion. 179 00:08:09,797 --> 00:08:11,793 "Explosion"? That's what that flash was. 180 00:08:12,046 --> 00:08:14,141 Do you remember anything before the flash? 181 00:08:14,298 --> 00:08:17,421 The smell of my grandma's unfiltered cigarettes. 182 00:08:17,756 --> 00:08:19,002 Unfortunately, 183 00:08:19,117 --> 00:08:22,763 Anita's desire to experience another olfactory-induced memory 184 00:08:23,096 --> 00:08:26,181 of her beloved grandmother, long dead from cancer, 185 00:08:26,437 --> 00:08:28,062 led her to sneak a look 186 00:08:28,146 --> 00:08:30,992 at the one and only advanced copy of Lenez's book, 187 00:08:31,275 --> 00:08:34,060 a book that was meant for his nose only. 188 00:08:35,025 --> 00:08:39,442 - This was clearly a case of... - Death by scratch-and-sniff? 189 00:08:39,738 --> 00:08:41,700 So Lenez didn't want you looking at that book? 190 00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:43,581 Didn't want anyone looking at it yet. 191 00:08:43,826 --> 00:08:46,770 Oh, no. Was I being punished for peeking? Is god mad at me? 192 00:08:46,785 --> 00:08:48,702 No. No, god is not mad at you. 193 00:08:48,955 --> 00:08:52,152 - Somebody's mad at somebody. - Somebody's mad at Napoleon Lenez. 194 00:08:52,375 --> 00:08:54,122 That damn book was booby-trapped. 195 00:08:54,416 --> 00:08:56,923 - Oh, 5 seconds. - Am I gonna see my grandma now? 196 00:08:57,178 --> 00:08:58,712 - You know. - That's a yes. 197 00:08:59,638 --> 00:09:01,590 Death by scratch-and-sniff -- 198 00:09:01,847 --> 00:09:04,993 What the hell happened to people shooting each other with guns? 199 00:09:06,226 --> 00:09:08,761 Anxious to sniff out more information, 200 00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,392 our heroes sought out Napoleon Lenez, 201 00:09:11,726 --> 00:09:13,351 scratch-and-sniff author, 202 00:09:13,607 --> 00:09:15,301 in his suite above the city 203 00:09:15,607 --> 00:09:19,193 and immediately found themselves in an alarming situation. 204 00:09:19,698 --> 00:09:21,941 Do not be alarmed by this situation. 205 00:09:30,088 --> 00:09:31,662 You better open up this door! 206 00:09:48,768 --> 00:09:52,012 Please excuse my decontamination procedure. 207 00:09:52,097 --> 00:09:54,042 My nasal glands are extremely delicate. 208 00:09:54,227 --> 00:09:56,522 - Napoleon Lenez? - Felicitations. 209 00:09:56,777 --> 00:09:58,192 Felici-what? 210 00:09:58,487 --> 00:10:00,382 Um, we're here about your assistant -- 211 00:10:00,567 --> 00:10:01,611 Don't speak. 212 00:10:01,945 --> 00:10:03,521 A smell tells so much more. 213 00:10:11,007 --> 00:10:15,371 Cigars, aftershave, antacids, cash... 214 00:10:15,627 --> 00:10:16,952 and yarn. 215 00:10:17,297 --> 00:10:19,000 You're a knitting detective. 216 00:10:20,467 --> 00:10:21,710 And you. 217 00:10:29,306 --> 00:10:31,642 Flour, fruit, 218 00:10:32,397 --> 00:10:36,811 and a subtle waft of musky pheromones triggered by -- 219 00:10:39,605 --> 00:10:40,853 You... 220 00:10:42,568 --> 00:10:44,481 The girl smelling of honey and... 221 00:10:45,657 --> 00:10:47,650 death. 222 00:10:49,497 --> 00:10:51,113 Which doesn't surprise me, 223 00:10:51,298 --> 00:10:54,120 as the animalic-charged molecules used in your perfume 224 00:10:54,208 --> 00:10:56,792 are also found in decomposing bodies and feces. 225 00:10:57,046 --> 00:10:58,642 Oh, I'm not wearing any perfume. 226 00:10:59,216 --> 00:11:01,832 I'm not wearing just any perfume. 227 00:11:02,175 --> 00:11:04,631 Precisely my point. Why settle for less? 228 00:11:05,006 --> 00:11:07,511 In all aspects of life, we strive for perfection. 229 00:11:07,845 --> 00:11:10,721 Why not apply those principles to what we smell? 230 00:11:11,057 --> 00:11:13,721 Lenez, look, we're here about that scratch-and-sniff. 231 00:11:13,976 --> 00:11:15,600 Your book was a bomb. 232 00:11:16,106 --> 00:11:18,972 Who are you to criticize my life's work? 233 00:11:19,436 --> 00:11:23,772 Your book was a bomb. It exploded. 234 00:11:24,657 --> 00:11:27,113 The killer had used a unique explosive 235 00:11:27,285 --> 00:11:29,693 on Lenez's advanced copy of the book, 236 00:11:29,838 --> 00:11:32,322 a chemical mixed with an oxidizing agent 237 00:11:32,408 --> 00:11:34,782 to create a fiery chain reaction. 238 00:11:35,578 --> 00:11:37,580 Are they still gonna publish your book? 239 00:11:37,796 --> 00:11:39,590 Anita would have wanted it that way, 240 00:11:40,008 --> 00:11:41,602 although I'm sure she would have 241 00:11:41,838 --> 00:11:43,632 preferred a version where she lived. 242 00:11:44,468 --> 00:11:46,742 Still, she was thrilled when my publisher 243 00:11:46,886 --> 00:11:48,772 bumped up the release date of "Smell of success." 244 00:11:48,806 --> 00:11:51,720 - When did they bump up your "smell"? - Two weeks ago. 245 00:11:51,976 --> 00:11:53,800 Follow your nose, Mr. Cod, 246 00:11:53,855 --> 00:11:56,253 and it will lead you to this deviant's doorstep. 247 00:11:56,478 --> 00:11:58,072 When we harness the power of smell, 248 00:11:58,107 --> 00:12:00,431 we become bloodhounds of our own desires. 249 00:12:00,936 --> 00:12:05,190 Smell it, crave it, own it. 250 00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:11,861 I can wear them? You mean it? On my feet? 251 00:12:12,117 --> 00:12:14,011 Unless you're cursed with a sixth toe. 252 00:12:14,867 --> 00:12:16,413 You're not, are you? 253 00:12:16,708 --> 00:12:18,990 No, no. Five fingers, five toes. 254 00:12:19,246 --> 00:12:20,913 Us snooks are boring that way. 255 00:12:21,757 --> 00:12:23,540 I had a cousin with a third nipple. 256 00:12:23,796 --> 00:12:25,262 He'd let you see it for a dollar. 257 00:12:25,298 --> 00:12:27,630 - How fascinating. - And a bargain, too. 258 00:12:28,095 --> 00:12:30,092 This is a dream come true. 259 00:12:33,428 --> 00:12:35,342 I hope this doesn't freak you out, 260 00:12:35,685 --> 00:12:38,803 but I used to be a big Darling Mermaid Darlings enthusiast. 261 00:12:39,107 --> 00:12:41,353 I had the tail and the clamshell bra. 262 00:12:41,855 --> 00:12:43,183 Just like this one. 263 00:12:43,505 --> 00:12:45,233 Did you show that off for a dollar? 264 00:12:45,396 --> 00:12:47,230 Oh, I bet you miss your fans. 265 00:12:47,527 --> 00:12:49,020 I know I would -- 266 00:12:49,328 --> 00:12:51,283 All the adoration, all the love. 267 00:12:51,658 --> 00:12:53,283 Doesn't all this paraphernalia 268 00:12:53,345 --> 00:12:55,242 make you want to get back in the pool? 269 00:12:55,535 --> 00:12:56,863 Have no reason to. 270 00:12:57,208 --> 00:13:00,793 - Um, we cancelled our comeback tour. - But look at all this stuff. 271 00:13:01,128 --> 00:13:04,043 Imagine the money you'll make from merchandising alone. 272 00:13:05,376 --> 00:13:06,673 What's this? 273 00:13:07,505 --> 00:13:11,463 - That belonged to Charlotte. - It was her mother's. 274 00:13:12,515 --> 00:13:15,051 Whatever happened to Charlotte's mother? 275 00:13:15,308 --> 00:13:16,741 She died. 276 00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:20,550 And with that, Lily went to her dark place. 277 00:13:20,818 --> 00:13:22,430 You want it? Take it. 278 00:13:22,817 --> 00:13:25,233 I don't care if I ever get in the water again. 279 00:13:26,647 --> 00:13:29,060 For the love of Kukla, Fran, and Ollie, 280 00:13:29,405 --> 00:13:32,863 rent the girl a hand truck and get this crap out of here. 281 00:13:33,117 --> 00:13:34,860 I need a piece of pie. 282 00:13:38,416 --> 00:13:40,860 Do you really think people can change their lives 283 00:13:40,878 --> 00:13:42,371 by smelling the right smell? 284 00:13:42,666 --> 00:13:44,862 If so, I'm gonna get me some cash potpourri. 285 00:13:45,348 --> 00:13:46,961 I talked to that publisher. 286 00:13:47,297 --> 00:13:48,993 Lenez's book was bumped up 287 00:13:49,046 --> 00:13:50,873 the release schedule prior to Anita Gray's murder. 288 00:13:50,906 --> 00:13:51,501 So... 289 00:13:51,628 --> 00:13:54,381 So if Lenez's book got moved up the schedule, 290 00:13:54,598 --> 00:13:56,340 somebody else's book got moved off. 291 00:13:56,477 --> 00:13:58,523 Find the book that was formerly on this schedule 292 00:13:58,555 --> 00:14:00,233 that is no longer on this schedule, 293 00:14:00,265 --> 00:14:02,651 and you'll find an angry author with a motive to kill. 294 00:14:02,685 --> 00:14:05,112 Look. A slice of pie is too much for some customers. 295 00:14:05,148 --> 00:14:06,600 A cup-pie would be perfect. 296 00:14:06,856 --> 00:14:08,783 See that? See what you just did just now? 297 00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:11,082 You interrupted our conversation with your cup-pie chatter 298 00:14:11,118 --> 00:14:12,572 when I don't even know what a cup-pie is, 299 00:14:12,608 --> 00:14:14,992 which means I don't give a damn what a cup-pie is. 300 00:14:15,026 --> 00:14:16,453 Oh, I'm sorry. A cup-pie 301 00:14:16,537 --> 00:14:18,881 is a single-serve pie with a honey-baked crust. 302 00:14:18,955 --> 00:14:20,371 Doesn't that sound good? 303 00:14:20,407 --> 00:14:22,590 Sounds delicious, but we don't serve them here. 304 00:14:22,625 --> 00:14:24,671 Am I seriously the first person to question 305 00:14:24,707 --> 00:14:26,252 your aversion to change? 306 00:14:26,757 --> 00:14:28,503 What about your ex-girlfriends? 307 00:14:28,836 --> 00:14:31,183 Emerson doesn't want to hear about any of this. 308 00:14:31,635 --> 00:14:33,751 I must admit, I am curious. 309 00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:37,340 Hell, before dead girl came along, 310 00:14:37,396 --> 00:14:38,841 I didn't know what you liked, 311 00:14:38,897 --> 00:14:41,481 or if you liked, or if you had anything to like with. 312 00:14:41,518 --> 00:14:43,482 For all I know, you could have been one of those people 313 00:14:43,515 --> 00:14:45,531 who was born with both but didn't use either. 314 00:14:45,567 --> 00:14:46,643 I've had girlfriends, 315 00:14:46,898 --> 00:14:48,660 but there were always extraneous factors. 316 00:14:48,695 --> 00:14:50,680 What kind of extraneous factors? 317 00:14:50,695 --> 00:14:51,902 You know, 318 00:14:51,936 --> 00:14:56,940 we, um... grew apart and... lost interest, 319 00:14:57,287 --> 00:14:59,610 had intimate relations on a bearskin rug. 320 00:14:59,995 --> 00:15:03,492 - Oh, no, did it... - It did enough to be upsetting. 321 00:15:04,676 --> 00:15:06,830 - Come on. - W-what's all this? 322 00:15:07,045 --> 00:15:08,622 Girl business. Bonding. 323 00:15:12,327 --> 00:15:15,003 Phase two has experienced a hiccup. 324 00:15:15,095 --> 00:15:16,513 The kind of hiccup that goes away 325 00:15:16,548 --> 00:15:18,570 if you have a glass of water or hold your breath? 326 00:15:18,608 --> 00:15:20,270 No, the kind of hiccup that keeps you up for days 327 00:15:20,306 --> 00:15:21,851 on end till you go crazy 328 00:15:21,888 --> 00:15:24,070 and you give away all your cherished mermaid mementos 329 00:15:24,108 --> 00:15:25,911 and refuse to get back in the pool again. 330 00:15:25,948 --> 00:15:28,180 Oh, no. Have they been eating their pie? 331 00:15:28,478 --> 00:15:31,073 Chuck, a slice of pie can't solve all their problems. 332 00:15:31,107 --> 00:15:32,422 We just need to give them stronger pie 333 00:15:32,456 --> 00:15:34,710 and give them a little push... into the water. 334 00:15:34,747 --> 00:15:37,343 - But I have been pushing. - You need to push harder. 335 00:15:37,537 --> 00:15:40,612 The pie maker feared Chuck and Olive bonding 336 00:15:40,908 --> 00:15:44,910 was like a chemical accelerant bonding with an oxidizing agent. 337 00:15:45,288 --> 00:15:47,873 An explosion was bound to pop up. 338 00:15:48,125 --> 00:15:49,451 Ooh, pop-ups! 339 00:15:49,877 --> 00:15:51,793 - What? - Pop-up books! 340 00:15:52,288 --> 00:15:53,872 I love pop-up books. 341 00:15:54,135 --> 00:15:56,673 And if the sacred cash cow that I worship 342 00:15:56,688 --> 00:15:58,382 is mooing down on us... 343 00:15:58,757 --> 00:16:01,263 Our killer likes pop-ups, too. 344 00:16:07,518 --> 00:16:11,772 Emerson and Ned pursued pinning down the pop-up author. 345 00:16:16,066 --> 00:16:19,690 Are you, uh, Chas Spielman, author of "Pop-up pin-up"? 346 00:16:20,036 --> 00:16:22,242 That's me. Are you here for a sneak peek, 347 00:16:22,536 --> 00:16:24,952 or should I say peep, of my latest book? 348 00:16:25,787 --> 00:16:27,741 I heard this book was canceled. 349 00:16:28,085 --> 00:16:30,280 Only temporarily. I'm still working on that. 350 00:16:32,505 --> 00:16:35,583 This don't look like no pop-up book I had as a child. 351 00:16:35,886 --> 00:16:37,531 Pop-ups aren't just for children. 352 00:16:37,846 --> 00:16:40,443 My pop-ups are designed for their original audience. 353 00:16:40,598 --> 00:16:41,883 Perverts? 354 00:16:42,215 --> 00:16:44,220 Mature connoisseurs of art. 355 00:16:44,476 --> 00:16:47,852 Or homicidal maniacs with rudimentary reading skills. 356 00:16:48,186 --> 00:16:49,852 "The new patriot's pop-up book -- 357 00:16:50,018 --> 00:16:51,851 a three-dimensional instructional 358 00:16:51,945 --> 00:16:53,562 telling you everything you wanted to know 359 00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:56,400 about building bombs of all shapes and sizes." 360 00:16:57,315 --> 00:17:00,360 Pop-up palace appeals to an unusual demographic. 361 00:17:00,826 --> 00:17:02,400 Any instructions in here on how 362 00:17:02,485 --> 00:17:04,493 to build a scratch-and-sniff bomb? 363 00:17:04,905 --> 00:17:07,070 Is this about the attempt on Napoleon Lenez? 364 00:17:07,497 --> 00:17:09,870 Word travels fast in literary circles. 365 00:17:10,165 --> 00:17:13,163 Well, his book did bump "Pop-up pin-up" off the schedule. 366 00:17:13,375 --> 00:17:15,782 Seems like a good-enough motive to blow somebody up. 367 00:17:15,818 --> 00:17:17,542 And clearly, you have the means. 368 00:17:17,886 --> 00:17:20,220 Who would publish a book on how to kill somebody, 369 00:17:20,258 --> 00:17:22,590 then kill somebody they knew 370 00:17:22,627 --> 00:17:25,260 using a method they published in the book? 371 00:17:26,848 --> 00:17:29,642 I'm keeping this book as evidence. 372 00:17:32,976 --> 00:17:34,232 And these, too. 373 00:17:42,487 --> 00:17:44,570 So, you didn't want Lenez dead? 374 00:17:44,945 --> 00:17:46,891 I may be petty, but I'm not that petty. 375 00:17:47,035 --> 00:17:48,881 Besides, the publisher moved Lenez's book 376 00:17:48,915 --> 00:17:51,740 from a prime holiday spot to no-man's-land. 377 00:17:52,085 --> 00:17:56,122 If you ask me, his book wasn't bumped, it was dumped. 378 00:18:00,968 --> 00:18:03,590 It smells like family hour at the public pool. 379 00:18:04,177 --> 00:18:06,011 Oh, no. That's not the pie. 380 00:18:06,307 --> 00:18:07,631 It's chlorine tablets. 381 00:18:07,935 --> 00:18:10,563 Aunt Lily used to say it smells like bottled sunshine. 382 00:18:10,595 --> 00:18:13,033 Well, if it came in a bottle, aunt Lily would like it. 383 00:18:13,065 --> 00:18:15,531 See, I've been reading this really good self-help book. 384 00:18:15,567 --> 00:18:17,183 It's about the power of smell. 385 00:18:17,526 --> 00:18:18,722 I thought we'd try it -- 386 00:18:18,985 --> 00:18:21,032 see what happens when you combine pie happiness 387 00:18:21,066 --> 00:18:22,862 with the happiness of chlorine. 388 00:18:25,368 --> 00:18:28,032 You know, I read a self-help book once -- 389 00:18:28,368 --> 00:18:29,700 "Samsonized -- 390 00:18:29,797 --> 00:18:32,443 how to grow your hair to become a more powerful you." 391 00:18:32,917 --> 00:18:35,751 Two weeks later, and I was bald as a baby's behind. 392 00:18:37,466 --> 00:18:39,662 Looks like I'm not the only one who read it. 393 00:18:39,717 --> 00:18:41,081 What's the haps, paps? 394 00:18:41,335 --> 00:18:42,673 Any luck on the case? 395 00:18:42,965 --> 00:18:44,562 First of all, I ain't your paps. 396 00:18:44,715 --> 00:18:46,840 "Paps" has a lady connotation. 397 00:18:47,138 --> 00:18:49,730 And second of all, this ain't none of your business. 398 00:18:50,057 --> 00:18:52,682 Oh, yuck. 399 00:18:52,978 --> 00:18:54,313 There's something -- 400 00:18:54,607 --> 00:18:56,182 something stuck in there. 401 00:19:09,736 --> 00:19:12,161 Oh, no, they didn't. 402 00:19:12,208 --> 00:19:14,700 The intent of the warning was obvious. 403 00:19:15,037 --> 00:19:16,662 "U can't save Lenez"? 404 00:19:16,997 --> 00:19:19,162 Someone wanted to make a stink. 405 00:19:26,925 --> 00:19:28,133 Decay... 406 00:19:29,478 --> 00:19:31,262 a tinge of rusted iron -- 407 00:19:31,848 --> 00:19:34,180 harsh but spiky, with a sulfuric edge. 408 00:19:34,977 --> 00:19:38,313 This loathsome omen came up from the sewer, 409 00:19:38,857 --> 00:19:41,403 which means it could have only come from one man -- 410 00:19:41,556 --> 00:19:44,111 Oscar Vibenius. 411 00:19:44,526 --> 00:19:46,570 Oscar Vibenius and Napoleon Lenez 412 00:19:46,906 --> 00:19:49,351 were lab partners and the best of friends, 413 00:19:49,576 --> 00:19:53,242 until their divergent olfaction theories tore them apart. 414 00:19:53,456 --> 00:19:55,530 Oscar favored the wild, unfettered 415 00:19:55,838 --> 00:19:57,660 smells of the natural world, 416 00:19:57,756 --> 00:19:59,772 believing that people couldn't appreciate 417 00:19:59,806 --> 00:20:02,750 the good smells in life without smelling the bad. 418 00:20:03,048 --> 00:20:05,080 Lenez believed that because smell 419 00:20:05,128 --> 00:20:07,322 has a powerful effect on human behavior, 420 00:20:07,355 --> 00:20:10,151 humans should surround themselves with only good, 421 00:20:10,467 --> 00:20:12,341 carefully controlled odors. 422 00:20:12,688 --> 00:20:14,801 Over time, their rivalry grew 423 00:20:15,006 --> 00:20:17,390 until neither man could stand the other. 424 00:20:17,765 --> 00:20:21,060 Each retreated to the worlds they found most comfortable -- 425 00:20:21,105 --> 00:20:22,890 one aboveground... 426 00:20:24,396 --> 00:20:26,191 And one below. 427 00:20:28,327 --> 00:20:30,191 There was really nothing I could do. 428 00:20:30,907 --> 00:20:32,753 It's sad, but Oscar would do anything 429 00:20:32,806 --> 00:20:35,001 to prevent my theories from being published. 430 00:20:35,285 --> 00:20:37,283 Do you have any idea where he could be? 431 00:20:37,587 --> 00:20:39,161 There were rumors. 432 00:20:39,706 --> 00:20:41,830 Some claim that he committed suicide. 433 00:20:42,126 --> 00:20:45,272 Others were convinced that he ended up in a mental institution, 434 00:20:45,465 --> 00:20:48,610 only to be put back on the street by the Reagan administration. 435 00:20:48,796 --> 00:20:51,462 I heard tales of Oscar roaming the sewers, 436 00:20:51,768 --> 00:20:53,050 haunting them, 437 00:20:53,977 --> 00:20:57,761 a soured husk of who he once was. 438 00:21:00,775 --> 00:21:03,862 But then someone recently told me he worked for the DWP, 439 00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:06,840 so that might explain where some of those rumors came from. 440 00:21:08,736 --> 00:21:10,230 Look carefully, ladies. 441 00:21:10,617 --> 00:21:12,783 This... is your future. 442 00:21:13,076 --> 00:21:14,073 Is it vodka? 443 00:21:14,865 --> 00:21:15,993 Water. 444 00:21:17,788 --> 00:21:19,832 As in Russian for vodka? 445 00:21:20,246 --> 00:21:23,450 As in English for H2O. 446 00:21:23,756 --> 00:21:25,652 Lily doesn't believe in water anymore. 447 00:21:25,875 --> 00:21:28,752 She thinks it's a waste of a perfectly good tumbler. 448 00:21:33,688 --> 00:21:37,390 - How about now? - Chlorine. 449 00:21:37,726 --> 00:21:40,970 Lily used to say it reminded her of bottled sunshine. 450 00:21:42,396 --> 00:21:45,350 Now it reminds me of children without bladder control. 451 00:21:53,157 --> 00:21:54,650 Why, Lily... 452 00:21:54,996 --> 00:21:56,492 Is that a smile? 453 00:22:09,467 --> 00:22:10,581 Just gas. 454 00:22:10,808 --> 00:22:12,052 So, she swallowed her happiness 455 00:22:12,086 --> 00:22:16,222 and retreated to the safety of her usual despondency. 456 00:22:16,596 --> 00:22:18,092 As Lily's gas passed, 457 00:22:18,137 --> 00:22:20,012 our determined heroes followed 458 00:22:20,106 --> 00:22:22,562 the tube sock to its own foul origin. 459 00:22:22,855 --> 00:22:24,351 Oscar Vibenius! 460 00:22:24,645 --> 00:22:26,540 We're really walking around down here. 461 00:22:26,646 --> 00:22:29,483 This is where he roams... and haunts. 462 00:22:29,776 --> 00:22:31,903 See, y'all gonna make me get my shoes wet. 463 00:22:32,198 --> 00:22:33,571 There's his toolbox. 464 00:22:37,246 --> 00:22:39,790 Looks like he's working on this thick, yellow hose. 465 00:22:40,038 --> 00:22:41,842 Well, let's follow the yellow, thick hose. 466 00:22:41,878 --> 00:22:43,370 Follow the yellow, thick hose. 467 00:22:43,957 --> 00:22:46,501 I sure hope there's methane down here, 468 00:22:47,045 --> 00:22:49,291 'cause the skinny ones are first to go. 469 00:22:51,428 --> 00:22:52,712 Hello? 470 00:22:54,965 --> 00:22:58,593 He ain't down here. Ain't nobody down here. 471 00:22:58,888 --> 00:23:01,782 We been looking around here for hours following dead girl, 472 00:23:01,848 --> 00:23:03,740 - and now we're lost. - We're not lost. 473 00:23:03,937 --> 00:23:05,883 We're following the yellow, thick hose. 474 00:23:05,898 --> 00:23:07,391 What about all those rumors -- 475 00:23:07,527 --> 00:23:10,223 The ones about Oscar ending up in a mental institution 476 00:23:10,237 --> 00:23:12,332 worse yet, becoming a modern-day monster? 477 00:23:12,486 --> 00:23:14,280 There are no such thing as monsters. 478 00:23:14,328 --> 00:23:16,531 - What about CHUD? - "CHUD"? 479 00:23:16,946 --> 00:23:19,200 Cannibalistic humanoid underground dwellers. 480 00:23:19,496 --> 00:23:22,240 They feed on the homeless and hapless passersby. 481 00:23:22,956 --> 00:23:24,951 I hear they're pack hunters. 482 00:23:25,336 --> 00:23:28,410 In that case, I sure hope he likes *** meat. 483 00:23:28,706 --> 00:23:29,790 Oh, thanks. 484 00:23:30,216 --> 00:23:31,792 Where are we, exactly? 485 00:23:32,836 --> 00:23:35,920 We should be in Lenez's neighborhood. 486 00:23:39,925 --> 00:23:41,221 In fact... 487 00:23:41,766 --> 00:23:44,060 we're right underneath his apartment building. 488 00:23:46,828 --> 00:23:47,910 What is that? 489 00:23:52,205 --> 00:23:54,190 What the hell is that? 490 00:23:58,025 --> 00:23:59,241 Osc-- 491 00:23:59,908 --> 00:24:01,702 Oscar Vibenius? 492 00:24:02,828 --> 00:24:04,491 You better run! 493 00:24:28,397 --> 00:24:31,850 Department of water and power employee Oscar Vibenius 494 00:24:32,005 --> 00:24:34,171 is wanted for questioning in the attempted murder 495 00:24:34,205 --> 00:24:37,731 of Napoleon Lenez, author of upcoming self-help opus 496 00:24:37,827 --> 00:24:39,610 "Smell of success." 497 00:24:39,947 --> 00:24:41,863 Presales of the book have skyrocketed 498 00:24:42,007 --> 00:24:44,410 since the first explosion which caused the death 499 00:24:44,466 --> 00:24:47,410 of Anita Gray, a former associate of Mr. Lenez. 500 00:24:47,707 --> 00:24:50,451 I may be clean, but my mind is in the gutter. 501 00:24:50,875 --> 00:24:52,923 What? Dirty thoughts? Lascivious pinings? 502 00:24:53,127 --> 00:24:55,122 In the sewer gutter with Oscar Vibenius. 503 00:24:55,256 --> 00:24:56,790 Oh, that gutter. 504 00:24:57,048 --> 00:24:58,442 He's not a very good killer. 505 00:24:58,676 --> 00:25:00,890 He keeps blowing things up, but never who he wants to blow up. 506 00:25:00,928 --> 00:25:02,603 Yeah, he's certainly no sharpshooter. 507 00:25:02,638 --> 00:25:04,333 Maybe he just likes the attention. 508 00:25:04,477 --> 00:25:06,252 I bet he's real pissy that Napoleon Lenez 509 00:25:06,285 --> 00:25:07,733 is getting all the attention. 510 00:25:07,977 --> 00:25:10,373 Oscar's about to get all the attention he wants. 511 00:25:10,856 --> 00:25:13,351 Sorry. I didn't know that you were here. 512 00:25:13,607 --> 00:25:15,301 How'd you get cleaned up so quick? 513 00:25:15,486 --> 00:25:17,231 I got cleaned up in exactly the amount of time 514 00:25:17,266 --> 00:25:19,510 it takes to get cleaned up. You're just slow. 515 00:25:19,616 --> 00:25:21,941 So, why's Oscar getting all the attention? 516 00:25:22,288 --> 00:25:23,981 Lenez's about to make a statement, 517 00:25:24,075 --> 00:25:26,750 and as witnesses to the most recent attempt on his life, 518 00:25:26,785 --> 00:25:28,430 we also have to make a statement, 519 00:25:28,627 --> 00:25:30,282 and that "we" don't include you. 520 00:25:30,586 --> 00:25:32,580 Why not? I witnessed the latest attempt. 521 00:25:32,797 --> 00:25:35,272 That don't change the fact that there's a grave out there 522 00:25:35,306 --> 00:25:36,921 that you supposed to be in. 523 00:25:36,957 --> 00:25:38,902 What you gonna tell people when they ask who you are? 524 00:25:38,937 --> 00:25:40,683 I'll say that I'm somebody I'm not. 525 00:25:40,718 --> 00:25:42,560 "Hey, somebody, can I see some I.D.?" 526 00:25:42,888 --> 00:25:44,732 Well, I'll smile, and I'll be polite, 527 00:25:44,928 --> 00:25:46,383 and I'll say, "Oh, I'm sorry. 528 00:25:46,728 --> 00:25:48,483 I forgot my purse, and I've got no pockets." 529 00:25:48,518 --> 00:25:50,203 "Well, hey, somebody, 530 00:25:50,267 --> 00:25:52,152 see, now I'm gonna need to see some I.D. 531 00:25:52,185 --> 00:25:54,110 On account of you look just like that dead girl 532 00:25:54,147 --> 00:25:56,110 that got herself killed on that tropical cruise." 533 00:25:56,148 --> 00:25:58,283 Okay, if that happens, I'll saying something like, 534 00:25:58,315 --> 00:25:59,863 "What is this, a police state?" 535 00:26:01,367 --> 00:26:04,112 If I ever say that, it means I'm having a panic attack. 536 00:26:04,446 --> 00:26:06,442 No need to panic 'cause she ain't going. 537 00:26:06,955 --> 00:26:08,363 You ain't going. 538 00:26:21,548 --> 00:26:24,550 Just wanted to... try it on before I gave it back. 539 00:26:24,887 --> 00:26:27,103 While I have you here, would you take my photo? 540 00:26:27,137 --> 00:26:28,470 Yeah, sure. 541 00:26:29,516 --> 00:26:31,611 You should know that operation fin follies 542 00:26:31,706 --> 00:26:33,350 is up and flapping. 543 00:26:33,647 --> 00:26:36,191 - The mermaids are singing. - But are they swimming? 544 00:26:36,318 --> 00:26:37,990 Well, they're thinking about swimming, 545 00:26:38,026 --> 00:26:39,523 but their hearts are singing. 546 00:26:39,817 --> 00:26:42,330 At least one of their hearts. The other one's stalling. 547 00:26:42,368 --> 00:26:44,232 Psychologically, not cardiologically. 548 00:26:44,578 --> 00:26:46,280 - Lily. - That's the one. 549 00:26:46,577 --> 00:26:48,243 Man, her nut don't crack. 550 00:26:48,495 --> 00:26:50,370 Let's do one for 4th of July. 551 00:26:53,417 --> 00:26:56,083 Her nut does crack. I know it does. 552 00:26:57,547 --> 00:26:59,003 I cracked it before. 553 00:26:59,297 --> 00:27:00,830 I've seen that crack. 554 00:27:04,928 --> 00:27:06,843 Thought maybe you'd want this. 555 00:27:09,767 --> 00:27:11,551 My aunts gave it to you? 556 00:27:11,895 --> 00:27:13,472 Practically forced it on me. 557 00:27:13,557 --> 00:27:16,153 I think it's a big first step for them, emotionally. 558 00:27:16,355 --> 00:27:17,803 What are the stages of death? 559 00:27:17,895 --> 00:27:20,640 Something, something, something, something, acceptance. 560 00:27:20,985 --> 00:27:24,023 - Those are the stages. - No, no. 561 00:27:24,407 --> 00:27:26,410 We're not at that stage of our friendship yet. 562 00:27:26,447 --> 00:27:28,000 Please don't cry in front of me. 563 00:27:28,036 --> 00:27:29,892 Don't do it. Don't you do it! 564 00:27:29,997 --> 00:27:31,673 - I'm not going to. - You better not. 565 00:27:31,707 --> 00:27:32,873 I won't. 566 00:27:34,577 --> 00:27:36,202 You did it. 567 00:27:40,588 --> 00:27:42,633 Would you like a piece of pie? 568 00:27:44,506 --> 00:27:46,590 What can smell do for you? 569 00:27:46,928 --> 00:27:49,972 If you're Napoleon Lenez, author of "Smell of success," 570 00:27:50,226 --> 00:27:52,342 the controversial new guide 571 00:27:52,455 --> 00:27:55,010 to satisfaction through olfaction, 572 00:27:55,268 --> 00:27:57,773 smell can get you killed. 573 00:27:58,146 --> 00:28:01,311 Napoleon, how many attempts have there been on your life? 574 00:28:01,605 --> 00:28:04,232 Right now, there's only been two, Carol. 575 00:28:04,487 --> 00:28:06,113 And you're anticipating more? 576 00:28:06,405 --> 00:28:07,531 I don't know. 577 00:28:07,827 --> 00:28:09,132 Seems like somebody out there 578 00:28:09,166 --> 00:28:11,160 doesn't want my book touching the world. 579 00:28:11,326 --> 00:28:12,963 Simply purging your life of the bad smells 580 00:28:12,995 --> 00:28:14,243 and focusing on the good. 581 00:28:14,625 --> 00:28:16,422 It's all there in my book, "Smell of success." 582 00:28:16,457 --> 00:28:17,872 But it's not just somebody. 583 00:28:18,205 --> 00:28:20,802 You know the man who made two attempts on your life. 584 00:28:20,878 --> 00:28:22,120 Yes, I do. 585 00:28:22,466 --> 00:28:24,172 His name is Oscar Vibenius. 586 00:28:24,886 --> 00:28:27,920 Here with us now is an eyewitness 587 00:28:28,037 --> 00:28:31,673 to Oscar Vibenius' attempt on your life earlier today. 588 00:28:31,926 --> 00:28:34,590 - Sir, tell us what you saw. - Good evening, Carol. 589 00:28:34,898 --> 00:28:37,180 Let me preface my statement by saying that 590 00:28:37,478 --> 00:28:39,902 my name is Emerson Cod. I'm a private investigator. 591 00:28:39,936 --> 00:28:41,130 If you need to reach me, 592 00:28:41,355 --> 00:28:45,350 my telephone number is klondike 5-0155. That's klondike 5-0155. 593 00:28:45,568 --> 00:28:48,362 I've been investigating the Anita Gray murder. 594 00:28:48,616 --> 00:28:51,160 - She was taken much too soon. - Get a load of Muggy McHambone. 595 00:28:51,195 --> 00:28:52,530 Hawking his wares. 596 00:28:52,868 --> 00:28:55,712 He just gave out his phone number on national television. 597 00:28:55,997 --> 00:28:58,201 Look. There's the killer. 598 00:28:58,295 --> 00:29:00,593 What makes somebody like Oscar Vibenius do it? 599 00:29:01,707 --> 00:29:04,503 Look. There's the killer. 600 00:29:04,875 --> 00:29:06,330 Oh, Lord. 601 00:29:10,258 --> 00:29:12,211 Don't make me cut a bitch. 602 00:29:12,515 --> 00:29:14,790 Hey, I'm just here for pie and conversation, 603 00:29:14,886 --> 00:29:17,341 neither of which are cause to call a man a bitch. 604 00:29:17,605 --> 00:29:19,513 You're trying to kill Napoleon Lenez. 605 00:29:19,768 --> 00:29:21,603 If I am, I'm not a very good killer. 606 00:29:21,898 --> 00:29:23,481 I keep blowing things up, 607 00:29:23,687 --> 00:29:25,640 but never who I want to blow up? 608 00:29:25,948 --> 00:29:28,310 I said that. Have you been spying on me? 609 00:29:28,527 --> 00:29:30,160 You'd be surprised what you can hear 610 00:29:30,195 --> 00:29:32,151 when you press your ear to the right pipe. 611 00:29:32,187 --> 00:29:34,211 If it wasn't you, then who was trying to kill Lenez? 612 00:29:34,247 --> 00:29:35,530 I have theories. 613 00:29:35,747 --> 00:29:37,750 You've been conducting your investigation. 614 00:29:37,785 --> 00:29:39,373 I've been conducting mine. 615 00:29:39,586 --> 00:29:42,700 We should talk, compare notes, come to conclusions. 616 00:29:43,005 --> 00:29:45,121 Now, how's about you put that knife to use 617 00:29:45,417 --> 00:29:47,411 and cut me off a piece of persimmon pie? 618 00:29:47,586 --> 00:29:49,100 All right, let's compare notes. 619 00:29:49,136 --> 00:29:52,031 Why were you in the sewer with your hands on a booby trap? 620 00:29:52,056 --> 00:29:56,511 Why Oscar Vibenius had his hands on a booby trap was this. 621 00:29:56,768 --> 00:29:59,411 After learning of the attempt on Lenez's life, 622 00:29:59,515 --> 00:30:03,063 Mr. Vibenius trailed his former colleague to a sewer main, 623 00:30:03,317 --> 00:30:05,010 where he lost track of him. 624 00:30:05,145 --> 00:30:06,991 But what he found in his stead 625 00:30:07,198 --> 00:30:10,111 was a mysterious yellow, thick hose, 626 00:30:10,445 --> 00:30:13,073 which he quickly realized was part of a plot 627 00:30:13,365 --> 00:30:15,862 to blow up Napoleon Lenez's car. 628 00:30:16,156 --> 00:30:18,570 He worked quickly to disable the threat, 629 00:30:18,786 --> 00:30:20,680 but couldn't dismantle the bomb 630 00:30:20,747 --> 00:30:22,843 before he was startled in the dark. 631 00:30:24,337 --> 00:30:27,162 Fearing said bomb was about to blow, 632 00:30:27,426 --> 00:30:29,022 he chose to run for cover 633 00:30:29,136 --> 00:30:31,082 rather than explain his actions. 634 00:30:31,138 --> 00:30:32,720 How do we know you're telling the truth? 635 00:30:32,755 --> 00:30:34,593 Lenez practically said that you were a CHUD -- 636 00:30:34,628 --> 00:30:36,480 - A cannibalistic -- - I know what a CHUD is, 637 00:30:36,516 --> 00:30:37,812 and I know Napoleon Lenez. 638 00:30:38,015 --> 00:30:39,980 Did he tell you what you smelled like when you met him? 639 00:30:40,016 --> 00:30:41,363 He thinks people like that. 640 00:30:41,648 --> 00:30:43,140 He said I smelled like honey. 641 00:30:43,395 --> 00:30:45,063 Like you've been dipped in it. 642 00:30:48,485 --> 00:30:51,021 There's something else you smell like. 643 00:30:51,448 --> 00:30:54,652 I know. Death. It's my perfume. 644 00:30:54,946 --> 00:30:56,322 You're not wearing perfume. 645 00:30:56,786 --> 00:30:58,453 No, this isn't death. 646 00:30:58,825 --> 00:31:00,781 This is something else altogether. 647 00:31:04,247 --> 00:31:06,372 I've never smelled anything like it. 648 00:31:06,707 --> 00:31:08,461 Do me. Do me. What do I smell like? 649 00:31:08,757 --> 00:31:10,043 Dog. 650 00:31:10,337 --> 00:31:11,653 Never mind dog. We need proof. 651 00:31:11,688 --> 00:31:13,642 We're not gonna believe you just because you say so. 652 00:31:13,678 --> 00:31:15,210 Would you believe your noses? 653 00:31:16,595 --> 00:31:18,052 Smells like rotten eggs. 654 00:31:18,518 --> 00:31:20,603 Well, it was incinerated in an exploding ball 655 00:31:20,635 --> 00:31:22,521 of methane gas. What else would it smell like? 656 00:31:22,557 --> 00:31:23,853 Nothing. 657 00:31:24,725 --> 00:31:27,271 - Methane gas is odorless. - I cook with gas. 658 00:31:27,528 --> 00:31:28,870 It smells like rotten eggs. 659 00:31:29,108 --> 00:31:31,222 The utility companies add a synthetic chemical smell to it 660 00:31:31,258 --> 00:31:32,781 before it's pumped into our houses. 661 00:31:32,817 --> 00:31:35,241 But a methane explosion in the sewer wouldn't have a smell, 662 00:31:35,276 --> 00:31:38,122 unless someone thought an ignorant public expected it to. 663 00:31:38,287 --> 00:31:42,202 Someone elitist, someone like Lenez. 664 00:31:42,418 --> 00:31:44,310 And with a book about to be published, 665 00:31:44,415 --> 00:31:46,802 he has the most to gain by an attempt on his life. 666 00:31:46,837 --> 00:31:49,543 Nothing sells books like a little murder and mayhem. 667 00:31:49,875 --> 00:31:51,790 I already preordered my copy. 668 00:31:52,545 --> 00:31:56,000 As Napoleon Lenez's star appeared to rise, 669 00:31:56,306 --> 00:31:59,010 Lily and Vivian's star continued to fall 670 00:31:59,346 --> 00:32:01,992 as they made their way through a box of slides 671 00:32:02,098 --> 00:32:03,740 documenting happier times. 672 00:32:04,018 --> 00:32:05,852 Oh, look, Lily! 673 00:32:06,145 --> 00:32:08,243 It's when we went to the Hebrew Feta Sect. 674 00:32:11,776 --> 00:32:15,112 - I miss my eye. - Peculiar. 675 00:32:15,568 --> 00:32:16,860 What? 676 00:32:17,155 --> 00:32:19,543 You said you miss your eye before you said you miss Charlotte. 677 00:32:19,575 --> 00:32:21,071 When I looked at that picture, 678 00:32:21,158 --> 00:32:23,040 the first thing I thought of was, "I miss Charlotte." 679 00:32:23,078 --> 00:32:24,873 Good god, Vivian. 680 00:32:25,166 --> 00:32:27,492 It was the first thing I thought of, too. 681 00:32:27,745 --> 00:32:29,041 It just so happens, 682 00:32:29,147 --> 00:32:31,460 I don't always say everything I think. 683 00:32:31,758 --> 00:32:33,120 Fancy that. 684 00:32:36,468 --> 00:32:39,801 It wasn't your eye -- why we stopped swimming. 685 00:32:40,136 --> 00:32:42,433 We told people it was, but it wasn't. 686 00:32:42,768 --> 00:32:45,182 We've been stopped swimming long enough 687 00:32:45,246 --> 00:32:47,930 for it not to matter why we stopped swimming. 688 00:32:48,938 --> 00:32:52,441 It used to make you so happy, the water. 689 00:32:52,818 --> 00:32:55,861 I think it's brave to try to be happy. 690 00:32:56,236 --> 00:32:59,441 You've gotten so comfortable being unhappy. 691 00:33:00,158 --> 00:33:02,110 Wouldn't it be wonderful 692 00:33:02,205 --> 00:33:05,403 to wake up in the morning and choose to be happy, 693 00:33:05,797 --> 00:33:09,081 to let the water wash everything away? 694 00:33:23,596 --> 00:33:26,090 You forgot your chlorine tablets. 695 00:33:26,975 --> 00:33:29,391 Her olfactory glands stimulated 696 00:33:29,687 --> 00:33:31,991 with the smells of synchronized swimming, 697 00:33:32,025 --> 00:33:34,851 Lily experienced a flood of endorphins 698 00:33:34,955 --> 00:33:37,232 from the scent of bottled sunshine 699 00:33:37,696 --> 00:33:41,073 as Napoleon Lenez experienced a flood of endorphins 700 00:33:41,365 --> 00:33:42,821 from his media blitz, 701 00:33:42,927 --> 00:33:45,001 which left the pie maker to carry out 702 00:33:45,035 --> 00:33:47,201 a blind-side blitz of his own. 703 00:33:47,256 --> 00:33:49,701 - Emerson! - Where did you go? 704 00:33:49,957 --> 00:33:51,452 I was bored and snooping. 705 00:33:51,495 --> 00:33:53,291 Okay, maybe ipso facto snooping, 706 00:33:53,388 --> 00:33:55,393 but it wasn't my goal to snoop, just entertain myself. 707 00:33:55,426 --> 00:33:56,712 You know how when you're a guest 708 00:33:56,746 --> 00:33:58,790 and you're bored and you go into the bathroom 709 00:33:58,825 --> 00:34:01,312 and read through the magazines and rummage through the medicine cabinet, 710 00:34:01,346 --> 00:34:02,971 look in the closets and under the bed, 711 00:34:03,015 --> 00:34:05,170 and you find something you were never meant to see? 712 00:34:05,205 --> 00:34:07,320 Get to the point. Damn. 713 00:34:07,435 --> 00:34:08,683 Well... 714 00:34:09,057 --> 00:34:11,441 that couldn't have gone better if I'd planned it. 715 00:34:11,475 --> 00:34:14,811 Smell it, crave it, own it. That's the spirit. 716 00:34:15,105 --> 00:34:17,231 So, once you smell it, then you crave it. 717 00:34:17,445 --> 00:34:19,841 How far are you willing to go before you own it? 718 00:34:20,235 --> 00:34:23,031 You can't just scratch and sniff and make a wish. 719 00:34:23,287 --> 00:34:25,213 You got to have a plan, and according to you, 720 00:34:25,245 --> 00:34:27,831 this thing couldn't have gone better if you'd planned it yourself, 721 00:34:27,867 --> 00:34:30,663 - which leads me to believe -- - You planned it yourself. 722 00:34:31,086 --> 00:34:32,950 You set Oscar up 723 00:34:33,048 --> 00:34:35,200 after you figured out the correct spacing. 724 00:34:35,668 --> 00:34:37,003 This is ridic-- 725 00:34:37,777 --> 00:34:39,172 How dare -- 726 00:34:39,506 --> 00:34:41,462 You planted that sock. 727 00:34:41,797 --> 00:34:45,213 I am not going to stand here and be accused. 728 00:34:45,465 --> 00:34:47,261 I think it's best if you both leave. 729 00:34:47,436 --> 00:34:48,683 I concur. 730 00:34:55,275 --> 00:34:58,942 When I suggested you leave, I didn't mean the penthouse. 731 00:34:59,157 --> 00:35:00,440 I meant this mortal coil. 732 00:35:01,276 --> 00:35:02,982 Congratulations, gentlemen. 733 00:35:03,237 --> 00:35:04,492 You're about to fall victim 734 00:35:04,526 --> 00:35:06,442 to attempt number three on my life. 735 00:35:06,747 --> 00:35:08,073 But don't worry. 736 00:35:08,326 --> 00:35:09,772 I'll mention you in the acknowledgements 737 00:35:09,806 --> 00:35:11,700 of the second printing of my book. 738 00:35:14,626 --> 00:35:16,371 Oh, hell, no! 739 00:35:23,675 --> 00:35:27,803 You got exactly 3 seconds to open this damn door! 740 00:35:28,097 --> 00:35:29,723 Wait. What's that smell? 741 00:35:29,978 --> 00:35:31,460 It's the chamber filling up 742 00:35:31,518 --> 00:35:33,321 with an amalgamation of explosive gases, 743 00:35:33,357 --> 00:35:34,980 which will erupt on my mark. So, please, 744 00:35:35,016 --> 00:35:36,641 if you're in a hurry to die, 745 00:35:37,027 --> 00:35:39,070 fire your gun and set the chamber ablaze. 746 00:35:39,148 --> 00:35:41,200 But killing us isn't gonna change anything! 747 00:35:41,238 --> 00:35:42,350 Says you. 748 00:35:42,778 --> 00:35:45,331 Imagine the public outcry when the press releases photos 749 00:35:45,367 --> 00:35:47,261 of my charred decontamination chamber, 750 00:35:47,406 --> 00:35:49,652 the crispy corpses of two private detectives 751 00:35:49,958 --> 00:35:51,533 unfortunate enough to trigger 752 00:35:51,787 --> 00:35:53,952 my nemesis's third attempt on my life. 753 00:35:54,247 --> 00:35:56,413 How tragic, but how perfectly titillating. 754 00:35:56,797 --> 00:36:01,173 Boy, Anita sure made a big mistake hitching her horse to your wagon. 755 00:36:01,378 --> 00:36:04,093 Don't say that. I never meant to hurt her. 756 00:36:04,427 --> 00:36:07,423 - You killed her! - But I didn't mean to. 757 00:36:07,675 --> 00:36:09,513 Her death was an accident. 758 00:36:10,055 --> 00:36:11,401 When it became clear 759 00:36:11,468 --> 00:36:14,210 his publisher was going to bury his life's work, 760 00:36:14,228 --> 00:36:17,642 Lenez concocted an explosive marketing strategy 761 00:36:17,698 --> 00:36:19,312 of his very own. 762 00:36:19,735 --> 00:36:21,312 He would boost interest in his book 763 00:36:21,345 --> 00:36:25,062 by pretending to be the target of a murderous rival's attack. 764 00:36:25,145 --> 00:36:27,732 His discovery of the booby-trapped tome 765 00:36:28,038 --> 00:36:30,011 would create a publicity whirlwind 766 00:36:30,045 --> 00:36:31,943 his publisher could not ignore. 767 00:36:32,326 --> 00:36:34,923 But there were variables he couldn't control, 768 00:36:35,077 --> 00:36:38,701 including the utter devotion of his most dedicated student, 769 00:36:38,957 --> 00:36:40,413 Anita Gray, 770 00:36:40,537 --> 00:36:43,253 who couldn't resist a quick sniff. 771 00:36:44,005 --> 00:36:47,171 Still, Anita's death only fueled the fire, 772 00:36:47,507 --> 00:36:50,100 increasing his book's presales exponentially. 773 00:36:50,305 --> 00:36:51,801 So, without further ado, 774 00:36:51,838 --> 00:36:54,341 Lenez set the rest of his plot in motion. 775 00:36:54,686 --> 00:36:57,022 He pinned the crime on Oscar, as planned, 776 00:36:57,055 --> 00:36:59,493 and further capitalized on the growing publicity 777 00:36:59,527 --> 00:37:03,983 by staging a second, more spectacular attempt on his life, 778 00:37:04,566 --> 00:37:09,020 an attempt that Oscar himself mistakenly helped legitimize 779 00:37:09,106 --> 00:37:11,490 by appearing on the scene to stop it. 780 00:37:11,908 --> 00:37:13,280 Goodbye, gentlemen. 781 00:37:13,655 --> 00:37:15,401 Please give Anita my felicitations. 782 00:37:15,535 --> 00:37:17,951 And, again, tell her I'm sorry. 783 00:37:22,756 --> 00:37:24,620 - Ned! - Chuck! 784 00:37:24,926 --> 00:37:26,832 - Oscar! - Napoleon! 785 00:37:27,938 --> 00:37:30,590 - Hi, Emerson. - Hey, Olive. 786 00:37:31,516 --> 00:37:33,512 - Wait, no, no! - It's okay! 787 00:37:33,605 --> 00:37:35,223 Oscar reversed the pumps! 788 00:37:35,557 --> 00:37:36,892 He what? 789 00:37:37,267 --> 00:37:38,911 Using his expert knowledge 790 00:37:38,977 --> 00:37:40,770 of the city's underground electrical grid, 791 00:37:40,808 --> 00:37:42,852 Oscar had reprogrammed Lenez's 792 00:37:43,005 --> 00:37:45,311 entire decontamination system 793 00:37:45,395 --> 00:37:47,611 just prior to entering the building. 794 00:37:48,027 --> 00:37:49,861 Repurposed and rejiggered, 795 00:37:50,075 --> 00:37:52,943 it no longer protected him from the outside world. 796 00:37:53,367 --> 00:37:56,242 Instead, it did just the opposite. 797 00:37:57,795 --> 00:37:59,542 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 798 00:37:59,877 --> 00:38:01,990 No. No! 799 00:38:03,375 --> 00:38:04,713 No!! 800 00:38:16,385 --> 00:38:18,590 As the system purged itself, 801 00:38:18,686 --> 00:38:20,682 the man who demanded purity 802 00:38:21,188 --> 00:38:23,183 was branded a filthy murderer. 803 00:38:23,525 --> 00:38:25,311 And the man who embraced filth 804 00:38:25,346 --> 00:38:28,691 rejoiced that his solid reputation had been cleansed. 805 00:38:29,808 --> 00:38:31,862 I'm canceling my preorder. 806 00:38:32,408 --> 00:38:35,492 Satisfied that another case had been closed, 807 00:38:35,597 --> 00:38:37,860 our heroes returned home. 808 00:38:38,248 --> 00:38:39,442 Elsewhere, 809 00:38:39,527 --> 00:38:43,542 a tentative breeze of hope signaled a new beginning. 810 00:38:44,508 --> 00:38:48,711 *Morning has broken* 811 00:38:50,845 --> 00:38:55,921 *Like the first morning* 812 00:38:57,637 --> 00:39:02,511 *Blackbird has spoken* 813 00:39:03,476 --> 00:39:06,853 *Like the first bird...* 814 00:39:08,596 --> 00:39:09,810 What are you doing? 815 00:39:11,156 --> 00:39:16,030 *Praise for the singing* 816 00:39:16,407 --> 00:39:21,282 *Praise for the morning* 817 00:39:21,666 --> 00:39:26,202 *Praise for them springing* 818 00:39:26,548 --> 00:39:31,212 *Fresh from the word* 819 00:39:33,966 --> 00:39:38,050 *Sweet the rain's new fall* 820 00:39:38,388 --> 00:39:42,220 *Sunlit from heaven* 821 00:39:42,605 --> 00:39:46,601 *Like the first dewfall* 822 00:39:46,896 --> 00:39:50,022 *On the first grass* 823 00:39:50,986 --> 00:39:54,691 *Praise for the sweetness* 824 00:39:54,988 --> 00:39:58,782 *Of the wet garden* 825 00:39:59,077 --> 00:40:03,121 *Sprung in completeness* 826 00:40:03,417 --> 00:40:07,450 *Where his feet passed* 827 00:40:09,088 --> 00:40:13,001 *Mine is the sunlight* 828 00:40:13,216 --> 00:40:16,962 *Mine is the morning* 829 00:40:17,386 --> 00:40:21,381 *Born of the one light* 830 00:40:21,637 --> 00:40:25,053 *Eden saw play* 831 00:40:26,267 --> 00:40:30,681 *Praise with elation* 832 00:40:31,028 --> 00:40:36,193 *Praise every morning* 833 00:40:36,656 --> 00:40:42,070 *God's re-creation* 834 00:40:42,995 --> 00:40:49,371 *Of the new day...* 835 00:40:55,586 --> 00:40:57,502 Another case closed, 836 00:40:57,626 --> 00:41:00,591 Emerson temporarily set aside his knitting needles 837 00:41:00,847 --> 00:41:02,682 to pursue a new hobby... 838 00:41:06,107 --> 00:41:09,721 One that magnified his happiness tenfold. 839 00:41:10,397 --> 00:41:12,443 I love pop-up books. 840 00:41:19,566 --> 00:41:21,993 You haven't seen my old sweater, have you? 841 00:41:22,286 --> 00:41:25,030 No. Have you seen my new menus? 842 00:41:25,285 --> 00:41:26,533 No. 843 00:41:27,877 --> 00:41:29,123 For me? 844 00:41:30,206 --> 00:41:31,621 For you. 845 00:41:37,676 --> 00:41:38,590 Cup-pies. 846 00:41:39,177 --> 00:41:40,921 The mere sight of each other 847 00:41:41,007 --> 00:41:43,551 left the pie maker and the girl named Chuck 848 00:41:43,845 --> 00:41:46,511 feeling exactly like they wanted to feel -- 849 00:41:46,806 --> 00:41:50,391 safe and warm and loved. 850 00:41:50,406 --> 00:41:54,250 Thanks to Raceman for the transcript 851 00:41:55,565 --> 00:41:56,682 Meanwhile, 852 00:41:56,807 --> 00:42:00,653 Oscar Vibenius embraced an obsession of his own. 853 00:42:06,997 --> 00:42:09,783 Chuck and her secret were in danger. 854 00:42:10,036 --> 00:42:11,192 And this time, 855 00:42:11,258 --> 00:42:13,751 it wasn't so much about the telling 856 00:42:13,848 --> 00:42:16,971 as it was the smelling. 857 00:42:17,187 --> 00:42:19,972 Subtitles made by the Bloc Team For www.forom.com