1 00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:24,316 (Baby cries) 2 00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:33,116 Hey, babes. 3 00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:37,670 l've got a presentation at 8:30. 4 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:40,513 Night-night, darling. Night-night. 5 00:00:49,560 --> 00:00:51,471 Good lad! 6 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,309 Night, darling. 7 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:13,716 (Baby still cries) - Sh, sh. 8 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:28,716 Oh, sod it. 9 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:31,636 ♪ Hallelujah 10 00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:34,036 ♪ Hallelujah 11 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:47,596 (Baby crying) 12 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,311 He's asleep. 13 00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:05,356 Good job. 14 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:08,756 (Crying starts again) 15 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,311 My turn. 16 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,356 You go back to sleep. 17 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,356 What do you mean, back? 18 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:30,756 (Alarm bleeps) 19 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:40,868 Oye, hay este chico, que no se como se llama pero...ay, qué mono! 20 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:42,871 Tienes hombre ahora? 21 00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:44,871 No? Por qué? 22 00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:48,873 ♪ What a beautiful morning What a wonderful day 23 00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:52,992 ♪ l gotta a beautiful feeling l'm ready... 24 00:02:55,640 --> 00:02:57,551 You're in a good mood. 25 00:02:57,640 --> 00:03:00,996 Why not? The sun is shining, the pound is up against the dollar, 26 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:03,514 and the memory of last night still lingers. 27 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:06,319 Now you're off the pill, don't you think it's better? 28 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,595 lt's certainly more frequent. 29 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:18,108 Hey, let me know when you'll be home and l'll run us a bath. 30 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:19,315 What? 31 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:22,437 After we've got clean, we can get filthy. 32 00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:24,795 l'm sorry. l've got to go. 33 00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:26,836 ..Pasa por aquí con nosotros? 34 00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:30,230 Why is Ramona always speaking Spanish on the phone? 35 00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:32,276 Me voy. Adiós. 36 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,956 Here, Josh. You hungry? 37 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:49,356 Navigation Road. 38 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:59,318 ♪ Only love 39 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:02,076 So, where are you living at the moment? 40 00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:04,913 Opposite sides of town. We're after somewhere together. 41 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,831 Well, you're wise to rent, not buy. 42 00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:09,434 Really? You think it makes financial sense? 43 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:13,035 Good God, no, it's much simpler when you split up. 44 00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:22,029 And by process of elimination, this must be the lounge. 45 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:24,270 Which way does the garden face? 46 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:26,351 That way. Er...south, l think. 47 00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:28,715 Not that it makes any difference in Manchester. 48 00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:30,711 Oh, Adam, it's perfect. 49 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,837 - Of course, it's also expensive. - Hey, we can afford it! 50 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:38,675 Think of all the savings we'll make living together - heating, food, toilet paper. 51 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,035 lt's got a second bedroom. That could be handy. 52 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:43,315 Yes, you might want one each one day. 53 00:04:44,360 --> 00:04:46,316 Oh, it is nice. 54 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:49,715 l can really see us living here... 55 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,230 lf yet l have not all thy love, 56 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:55,517 Dear, l shall never have it all 57 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:58,353 I cannot breathe one other sigh to move 58 00:04:58,440 --> 00:05:01,512 Nor can entreat one other tear to fall... 59 00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:05,951 So can l. 60 00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:23,430 - Let's take it. - Sure it's not too expensive? 61 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:25,431 We can manage, and if not... 62 00:05:25,520 --> 00:05:27,476 l'll forget the pool table. 63 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,156 What pool table? 64 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,270 l don't know. Do we really want to go skiing? 65 00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:38,271 We go every year. 66 00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:40,954 Precisely. Let's do something else for a change. 67 00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:43,110 OK. What about the Caribbean? 68 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:45,111 Or the Lake District. 69 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:47,111 The Lake District? 70 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:50,158 No flight delays. You get some very good deals in the winter. 71 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:53,516 Yeah, because it's winter. No-one wants to go. 72 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,909 Well, maybe we should wait till August. 73 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,718 Are we suddenly poor or something? 74 00:05:57,800 --> 00:06:00,155 No! No, we're not poor. 75 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:04,758 We're just a bit...strapped. 76 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:18,478 You know how they say that investments... can go down as well as up? 77 00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:20,471 Yes? 78 00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:22,516 Well, ours have... 79 00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,035 lt was this chap l know in the City. 80 00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:33,954 He asked me if l wanted to invest in a new golf course... 81 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,956 ..in Africa. 82 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:41,638 Well, there are very few golf courses in Africa. 83 00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:43,676 There are very few golfers. 84 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:45,716 There's a rising urban elite. 85 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:48,596 At least there was, until the coup. 86 00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:50,750 How much have we lost? 87 00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:53,638 - Si quieres venir el martes... - She's at it again. 88 00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,988 There can't be that many Spaniards in Britain! 89 00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:01,072 She's on the phone to her mother. lt's her 60th birthday. 90 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:04,072 - What's wrong with a card? - How much, David? 91 00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:09,196 £1 5,000. 92 00:07:11,240 --> 00:07:17,156 You put £1 5,000 of our money into some harebrained scheme? 93 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:18,958 lt was not harebrained. 94 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:20,758 lt looked like a sure thing. 95 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:22,831 Oh, right. Lovely, darling. 96 00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:26,117 What other 'sure things' are we investing in? 97 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:29,317 An off-licence in Saudi, a nightclub in lran? 98 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:31,436 Euro-bloody-tunnel? 99 00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:33,476 We do have some Eurotunnel shares, yeah. 100 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:37,156 David, why didn't you tell me? 101 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:39,231 Well, you weren't interested in the past. 102 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:41,276 Well, rest assured, l am now. 103 00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:44,680 l suggest you get on the phone to our accountant. 104 00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,558 lt's time we reassessed our portfolio. 105 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:52,191 Jen? 106 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:54,236 No! 107 00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:04,196 Right, wipes. 108 00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:06,236 Oh, yeah. 109 00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:13,116 One of them. 110 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,551 What's that for? 111 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:22,596 l don't know! 112 00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:26,916 How did our parents cope without all this help? 113 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,958 Right. Baby alarms... 114 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,718 This one'll do. 115 00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:36,233 No, this one's better. 116 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:38,832 Yeah, and it's 30 quid more. 117 00:08:38,920 --> 00:08:43,357 You get what you pay for. Anyway, this one's 'stylishly designed'. 118 00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:47,669 - And you can use it abroad. - Oh, that is an impressive range. 119 00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:51,398 Pete! lt is recommended by What Baby? 120 00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,835 And it's 30 quid more. 121 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:56,514 Do you want the best for our child or not? 122 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:05,550 l had to go to Safeway's. We've had all the Tesco's boxes. 123 00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:08,074 Remember those two waiters in Berlin? 124 00:09:09,160 --> 00:09:11,116 Oh, my God! Rolf and Ralf! 125 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:14,071 Which one did you shag? 126 00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:15,559 Neither. 127 00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:17,153 l shagged them both. 128 00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:19,151 You did not? 129 00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:21,151 You foul slut! 130 00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:22,275 No way! 131 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:24,112 (Phone rings) 132 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:26,955 Hello? 133 00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:29,270 Hi, gorgeous, how's it going? 134 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:32,033 Erm, OK. l'd say we were getting there. 135 00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:33,997 You are brutally throwing stuff out? 136 00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,514 Yeah, there's an Oxfam piIe right here. 137 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:41,469 Presuming they want a 20-year-old Blue Peter annual and a small plastic gnome. 138 00:09:41,560 --> 00:09:42,834 l gave you the gnome! 139 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:46,472 And keep the BIue Peter annuaI, it might be worth something. 140 00:09:46,560 --> 00:09:49,358 l'm almost done here. l'll see you at the house. 141 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:51,590 Would that be our house? 142 00:09:51,680 --> 00:09:53,591 ln the middle of our street. 143 00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,636 See you. 144 00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:58,636 Love that girl. 145 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:07,835 Which one of us do you think he takes after? 146 00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:09,433 (Passes wind) 147 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,829 Clever boy! You. 148 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:13,831 Will you change him? 149 00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:15,831 Do you know, l wish we could. 150 00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:17,353 Only joking. 151 00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:19,715 l've just got back from work. l'm a bit knackered. 152 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:21,711 So am l. 153 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:23,950 l've still got to get the tea on. 154 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,996 Right, there you go. 155 00:10:27,040 --> 00:10:29,952 Careful, it's a follow-through. 156 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,951 Ooh, you little monkey. 157 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,996 Come here. 158 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:53,193 Blimey. 159 00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:55,316 Never mind. We'll clean you up. Come here. 160 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:56,628 That's it. 161 00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,351 There we go. 162 00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:03,396 Hey! O-oh, tots. 163 00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:07,271 lt's only wee. lt's only wee. 164 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:11,951 Right, come here. 165 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:14,270 Right, up we go. 166 00:11:15,360 --> 00:11:17,316 (Ploop) 167 00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:22,396 Jenny! 168 00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:25,359 (Turns volume up) 169 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:27,112 Jenny! 170 00:11:36,120 --> 00:11:38,270 (Car radio plays) ♪ MADNESS: Our House 171 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:45,160 - lt looks like they're moving in next door. - Really? 172 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:48,152 This is yours? l thought you were throwing stuff out! 173 00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,151 l was. l told you. 174 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,310 Yeah, a plant pot and an old Blue Peter annual. 175 00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:54,311 No, l kept the annual. 176 00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:56,311 You told me to! 177 00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:59,631 l have tried to get rid of things, but all this stuff is my life. 178 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:01,631 Well, how old are you? 1 90? 179 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:05,030 (Mimics his Ulster accent) Get a grip, big man. 180 00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:15,151 Thank you. 181 00:12:15,240 --> 00:12:16,753 No milk? 182 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:18,353 No fridge. 183 00:12:18,440 --> 00:12:20,351 Ah-ha. Fridge. 184 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,716 - And the loo doesn't flush properly. - Oh, l'm already onto that. 185 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:25,153 You've fixed it? 186 00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:27,196 No, but l've made a note to. 187 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:36,398 You know what l'm looking forward to most? 188 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,391 What? 189 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:40,516 Not having to be apart again. 190 00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:44,476 What about you? 191 00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:46,516 Having more space. 192 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:49,911 l mean... 193 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,956 look at all this crap. 194 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:55,430 ''The World's Greatest Lover.'' 195 00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:58,353 Who gave you this? Your first boyfriend? 196 00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,352 - How did you know? - lt's written in crayon. 197 00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:03,510 Do we really need to keep this? 198 00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:05,511 Sentimental value. 199 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:08,717 l have very fond memories of that afternoon. 200 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:10,756 Fake wedding certificate. 201 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:16,270 - No, no, no, no. Let's have a look. - Adam, give... 202 00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:17,839 ''Rachel Louise Bradley, 203 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:20,388 and Kris - with a K - Bumstead. 204 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:21,993 Students.'' 205 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:25,519 Were they giving these out in rag week or something? 206 00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:26,715 Sort of. 207 00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:28,711 lt's not very funny. 208 00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:30,870 No, it wasn't. That's why it didn't last. 209 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,071 No-one knows... 210 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,116 Well, except Kris. 211 00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:41,796 l once got married. 212 00:13:42,800 --> 00:13:44,472 What? 213 00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:46,596 l know. lt was a long time ago. 214 00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,711 This is real? 215 00:13:57,600 --> 00:13:59,511 We were young... 216 00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:04,233 You were married and you never told me? 217 00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:07,550 How could you not tell me, Rach? 218 00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:09,596 l forgot. 219 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:12,871 l've been trying to forget. 220 00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:14,632 - How long did it last? - 23 days. 221 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:17,029 Then he'd slept with my best friend. 222 00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:18,473 - Bastard. - l know. 223 00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:20,755 Not him, you! 224 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:22,193 How could you not tell me? 225 00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:25,192 lt didn't seem to matter... lt was less than a month. 226 00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:27,316 l've had plenty of boyfriends for longer. 227 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:29,231 Boyfriends, yes. Husbands, no! 228 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:33,396 Rach. 229 00:14:39,520 --> 00:14:41,476 When did you get divorced? 230 00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:46,755 That's the other thing l haven't told you. 231 00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:55,198 Bingo. 232 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:04,276 Do you want to have sex? 233 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:06,316 - You're joking? - Yes. 234 00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:11,038 Four hours. lf we're lucky, we might get four hours. 235 00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:13,076 So long as nothing disturbs him. 236 00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:16,796 (Knock at door) 237 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:18,836 (Baby cries) 238 00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:28,356 Good. You're still up. 239 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,435 Come in. 240 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:31,475 Rachel? 241 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:35,473 Sorry to come round so late. l tried ringing, but you were engaged. 242 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:37,391 l thought we were sleeping... Ramona. 243 00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:39,835 - What's happened? - She must have the cordless. 244 00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:42,150 We've had a row. Adam's walked out. 245 00:15:42,240 --> 00:15:44,151 Ramona, get off the phone! 246 00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:46,151 Why would he just walk out? 247 00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:48,390 Because l told him l'm married. 248 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:50,516 BOTH: Married? 249 00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:52,670 - Married? - Yes, married. 250 00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:54,671 - Rachel's married. - Married? 251 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:56,671 Yes, married. 252 00:15:56,760 --> 00:15:58,034 ln name only. 253 00:15:58,120 --> 00:15:59,997 Bumstead? 254 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:01,991 Well, l never used it. 255 00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:04,594 Well, you wouldn't, would you? 256 00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:08,832 Rachel, l've known you for six years. You've never mentioned this. 257 00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:10,876 Believe me, l'd remember. 258 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:13,951 Well, he broke my heart. 259 00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:15,996 Who wants to talk about it? 260 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:20,269 l suppose l hoped it would just... 261 00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:22,271 go away. 262 00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:24,271 So... 263 00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:27,079 have you seen your husband since? 264 00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:33,355 He and Suzie went off to lndia together, to live in an ashram. 265 00:16:34,400 --> 00:16:37,551 The last time l saw them was the day they left. 266 00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:41,312 Look, Adam will come round. 267 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:44,631 l mean, you're not going to have a problem getting a divorce! 268 00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:47,591 ADAM: She doesn't want one. 269 00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:49,591 - What? - Why? 270 00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:51,716 Because l'm insisting on it. 271 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,436 We had a row. 272 00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:00,476 A big row. 273 00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:03,831 She threw my gnome at me. 274 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:05,831 You're lucky it's plastic. 275 00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:09,390 l feel so betrayed. How could she not have told me? 276 00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:12,836 Adam, all couples have secrets from each other. 277 00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:15,480 - We don't. - Not that they're married to someone else! 278 00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:17,471 Do we? 279 00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:19,073 This changes everything. 280 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,720 No, it doesn't. Rachel's no different. 281 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:23,711 She has a husband! 282 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:26,030 l'm living with a married woman! 283 00:17:26,120 --> 00:17:29,112 - My mother'll have a fit. - Well, don't tell her! 284 00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:31,509 Yeah, it worked for Rachel long enough. 285 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:34,433 l said to her, ''Listen, you bollocks, you better get a divorce.'' 286 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:37,796 - What was her reaction? - The gnome. 287 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,830 Then she yelled something about 288 00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:45,072 how she won't have me dictating who she can and can't marry. 289 00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:47,071 Anyway, l was gone... 290 00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:49,754 Oh, yeah, that's another thing. Can l stay? 291 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:52,559 (Both laugh uproariously, then stop) 292 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:10,156 Well, l see your economy drive hasn't reached your wine cellar. 293 00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:13,755 But l have made one significant saving - l put a lock on the phone. 294 00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:15,796 He lets me have a key. 295 00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:20,751 Right, well, 296 00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:22,751 to business. 297 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:26,549 The Lord giveth, and the lnland Revenue taketh away. 298 00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,837 But sometimes they giveth back - a tax rebate. 299 00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:32,514 - ln fact, £1 ,000. - A skiing holiday. 300 00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:35,194 A chance to recoup some of our losses. 301 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:38,397 l see. Your harebrained scheme, our losses. 302 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:41,677 - So what do you recommend, Larry? - Marriage guidance. (Chuckles) 303 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:46,869 lt really does depend on how much risk you want to take. 304 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,916 Probably less than you have. 305 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,514 You still have time to take out a PEP, 306 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:54,114 or a unit trust might be worth a look. 307 00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,191 - Do you have any literature? - Reams. 308 00:18:57,280 --> 00:18:58,793 Right. 309 00:18:59,880 --> 00:19:03,668 We'll have a look through this lot and make a decision. 310 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:06,399 l don't think fiscal prudence is quite your forte. 311 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:08,710 l'm not sure it's yours, old man. 312 00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:12,236 - lsn't your golf course waterlogged? - And Marxist? 313 00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:26,674 TV: Mia Farrow was once married to which singer- Tony Bennett or Frank Sinatra? 314 00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,716 Frank Sinatra. Frank Sinatra. 315 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,711 Frank Sinatra. 316 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,756 (AppIause) 317 00:19:35,120 --> 00:19:37,076 It is so cIose. 318 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:43,675 Which French general said to his wife, ''Not tonight, Josephine''? 319 00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:46,718 (Baby cries) - l missed that answer! 320 00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:50,479 At least we know he's not constipated. 321 00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:51,754 (Jenny growls) 322 00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:53,990 Please! l'm trying to eat here. 323 00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:55,991 (Crying continues) 324 00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:58,071 Doesn't he ever stop crying? 325 00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:00,958 - Only when he's asleep. - Not very often, then. 326 00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:02,951 - Pete? - Yeah? 327 00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:05,031 Where's my milk l expressed? 328 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:07,076 lt's not in here. 329 00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,596 (Retches) 330 00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:15,796 Very funny. 331 00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:20,310 KAREN: It's reaIIy IoveIy, RacheI. 332 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,311 Yeah, it's nice. 333 00:20:22,400 --> 00:20:24,755 Well, it could be nice. 334 00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:28,311 lt's lacking something. 335 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,311 Furniture? 336 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:32,356 Adam. 337 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:35,432 Ah. 338 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:42,196 (Silent exchange) 339 00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:45,751 How is Adam? 340 00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:48,479 Er, yeah, he's fine. You know, great. 341 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,196 More trouble than the baby. 342 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,554 Yesterday, he offered to baby-sit. 343 00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:57,471 Bye. 344 00:20:57,560 --> 00:20:59,471 Trust me. 345 00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:01,869 We went for a walk, not a long one. 346 00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:04,793 l didn't trust either of them to behave. 347 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:10,637 Somebody told Adam that newborn babies have a highly-developed survival instinct. 348 00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:14,838 So you can get them to grip a rope, and they'II know not to Iet go. 349 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,075 Thank God he landed in some washing. 350 00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,071 What, and Adam told you this? 351 00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:33,230 The next-door neighbour did. 352 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:38,358 Rach, please get a divorce. 353 00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:41,238 Go on. Eh? 354 00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:43,231 For me. 355 00:21:43,320 --> 00:21:46,312 None of us like to be told what to do by our men, 356 00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:48,436 and usually it's grounds to do the opposite, 357 00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:51,910 but in this case, and l say this as your closest friend, 358 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,956 who thought she knew everything about you, 359 00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:58,989 l am 1 00%, completely, totally and utterly in Adam's camp on this one. 360 00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:01,036 Me, too. 361 00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:05,990 Look, l am not being stubborn, it's just that... 362 00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:10,915 l am being stubborn, aren't l? 363 00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:13,438 Directory enquiries 1 92. 364 00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:15,238 What if he's ex-directory? 365 00:22:15,320 --> 00:22:17,276 As in ex-husband? 366 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:27,400 Can l tell you something...man to man? 367 00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:31,751 l hate my life. 368 00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:36,072 l love the baby, but it's everything else that goes with him. 369 00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:38,754 - Fatherhood. - lt's hell. 370 00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:41,070 lt's no fun being a house guest either. 371 00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:44,789 l am a complete physical and psychological wreck. 372 00:22:44,880 --> 00:22:48,589 ln Libya, they use babies as instruments of torture, 373 00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:50,636 to extract confessions. 374 00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:54,558 - Does Jenny feel the same way? - Oh, no way. She's a woman. 375 00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,756 - Comes naturally to her. - Mm. 376 00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:02,358 Do you think she'll have dinner ready yet? 377 00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:04,715 We'd best give her five minutes. 378 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,115 - Time for a pint, then. - Pint, yeah. 379 00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:11,596 ♪ Piano 380 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:19,755 Hi. 381 00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:21,751 Oh, thanks. 382 00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:48,831 So what do we do here? 383 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,912 Kiss, or are you going to take a swing at me? 384 00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:02,953 Hiya. 385 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:05,711 Hi. 386 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,629 ADAM: She's meeting him for a drink? 387 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:11,393 - l thought you'd be pleased. - That she's on a date with him? 388 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,994 lt is not a date. She just wants to discuss a divorce. 389 00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:17,709 What's to discuss? ''l want a divorce.'' She could put that on a postcard. 390 00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:21,429 And still have room for ''lots of love'' on the bottom. 391 00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:24,034 lt happens to be over a glass of wine, 392 00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:26,793 but l'm telling you, Rachel was dreading it. 393 00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:31,874 lmagine how traumatic she'll find it - dredging up painful memories. 394 00:24:35,480 --> 00:24:39,393 At least l didn't sound like l was having an asthma attack. 395 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:40,879 (Wheezing gasps) 396 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:42,359 (Grunts) 397 00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:44,829 - l was having an asthma attack. - No? Really? 398 00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:46,717 (Both laugh) 399 00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:53,718 - Well, at least l didn't weep. - Oh, once! 400 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:57,839 That happened once, and no other woman's made me do that. 401 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:00,996 Not even Suzie? 402 00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:03,796 Ouch. 403 00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:07,231 - How is she? - Suzie? 404 00:25:07,320 --> 00:25:09,356 - Yeah. - Dunno. 405 00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:11,351 We only lasted about a week. 406 00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:15,592 As soon as we got to lndia, she dumped me for the yoga teacher. 407 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,591 l think he was more supple. 408 00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:19,636 Wow, that is supple. 409 00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:26,037 You know, Suzie never meant anything to me. 410 00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:30,231 Well, more fool you, then. 411 00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:32,276 Yeah. 412 00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:35,311 ADAM: No, no, no, no. 413 00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:38,358 l'm not happy about this, not happy at all. 414 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:41,034 Clearly too upset to do the drying-up. 415 00:25:41,120 --> 00:25:43,953 l tell you what. l'll take him out for a pint, cheer him up. 416 00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,270 Leave me with the dishes? Sweet. 417 00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:48,874 You two go out. Don't worry about me. 418 00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:52,077 l'll stay here, baby-sit. 419 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,071 BOTH: No! 420 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:57,516 There you are. He's woken up - too many blankets. 421 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,558 - Any less, he'd catch a chill. - Any more, he'd overheat. 422 00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:02,756 - Main cause of cot death. - What? 423 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:04,796 - l saw it on Casualty. (Baby crying) 424 00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:07,551 Right, Pete. 425 00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:09,596 Can l have a word? Now! 426 00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:13,396 Well done. 427 00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:25,520 God, Rachel, it's so good to see you. 428 00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:29,477 lt was worth hitching up from London for. 429 00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:31,471 You hitched? 430 00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:34,120 Yeah. As soon as l got your message. 431 00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:39,992 lt's funny, innit? You run these things over and over in your mind, 432 00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:42,355 and they never turn out that way in real life, 433 00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:44,431 but this one has. 434 00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:49,548 l always hoped we could be mates again. 435 00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:55,638 You know, we can meet up like this and... 436 00:27:00,640 --> 00:27:02,551 Anyway... 437 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,029 You said you had something to talk to me about. 438 00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:09,151 Oh. 439 00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:11,196 Yeah... 440 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:17,196 Let's get some more wine. 441 00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:20,117 OK. 442 00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:25,196 What a catch. What a catch. 443 00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:30,798 - Get a bollocking, did you? - Nah... 444 00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:33,592 Yeah. 445 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:36,551 Look, Adam... 446 00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:38,551 Erm... 447 00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:42,952 Jenny and me. l... We...think it's about time you moved on. 448 00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:46,237 You can't be comfortable sleeping on a couch. 449 00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:49,392 Don't worry about me. l can sleep anywhere. 450 00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:51,996 Er...no, you can't. 451 00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:56,631 Not here. 452 00:27:56,720 --> 00:28:00,190 We've been having a difficult time with the baby. 453 00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:03,829 You'd be more than welcome back when he's older... 454 00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:06,832 - 1 6 or so. - Jenny wants me to leave? 455 00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:08,676 Tonight. 456 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:11,558 Tonight? l've got to go and pack my bag now? 457 00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:16,235 She's already packed it for you. lt's by the door. 458 00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:25,238 ♪ Put your sweet lips... - This is a great week. 459 00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:30,599 ♪ ..up closer to the phone 460 00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:39,832 ♪ Let's pretend that we're together all alone 461 00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:49,158 ♪ l'll tell the man to turn the jukebox way down low 462 00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:52,357 ♪ And you tell your friend... 463 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:54,351 Yeah? Can l help you? 464 00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:57,512 ♪ You'll have to... 465 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:00,956 Rachel's boyfriend? Kris. 466 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:02,359 Rachel's husband? 467 00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:04,351 Yeah. Look, come in, mate. 468 00:29:04,440 --> 00:29:06,396 Make yourself at home. 469 00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,471 Sorry, l'm a bit... 470 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:13,471 l didn't expect you to be... 471 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:14,629 Black? 472 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:16,199 Here. 473 00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:18,958 Where's Rachel? 474 00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:21,793 (Toilet flushes) - She erm... She had a bit too much to drink. 475 00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:24,633 - Threw up all over my top. - You were standing that close? 476 00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:26,676 lt was projectile. 477 00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:28,716 Adam! 478 00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:31,592 l-l wasn't expecting you home. 479 00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:33,591 So it would seem. 480 00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:36,638 - Really glad you're back. - Why? ls the loo still buggered? 481 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:38,911 Yeah, a little bit, but... 482 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,319 l've missed you. 483 00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:42,311 Really? 484 00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:46,234 l'll go and put some coffee on. Strong and black, yeah? 485 00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:53,193 Excellent. 486 00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:55,191 Since 1 st July, 1 994, 487 00:29:55,280 --> 00:30:01,355 UK companies may pay dividends as foreign income dividends. 488 00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:02,998 What does that mean? 489 00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:05,389 lt means you don't understand what you're reading. 490 00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:09,473 Who can blame me? l've just read a sentence five lines long with only one verb in it. 491 00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:12,279 - Who writes stuff like that? - Lawyers. 492 00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:15,909 Well, they should have it checked by human beings. 493 00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,434 And what's this column of figures? 494 00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:22,354 Who cares? The only figure l'm interested in is yours. 495 00:30:25,240 --> 00:30:27,196 (Knock at door) 496 00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:29,631 Come in! 497 00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:31,631 Forgive to interrupt. 498 00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:34,917 Can l use the telephone, please, because my mother... 499 00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:39,710 My sister called me and l don't think my mother very well, so is it possible to use the phone? 500 00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:41,756 Yes, yes, all right! 501 00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:43,990 You want to give me the key again? 502 00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:46,036 Yes, Ramona. 503 00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:50,796 - Noches. - Noches. 504 00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:54,116 (Mimics) Noches. 505 00:30:57,240 --> 00:30:59,196 What does she mean, again? 506 00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:03,798 You haven't mentioned the divorce? 507 00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:06,678 - l didn't want to rush it. - You've been separated seven years! 508 00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:09,433 - lt's hardly indecent haste! - l will tell him in my own time. 509 00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:10,748 When? 510 00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:12,751 l dunno! 511 00:31:12,840 --> 00:31:15,957 Well, can you give me a clue? This side of your golden wedding? 512 00:31:16,040 --> 00:31:17,996 Adam, look... 513 00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:22,798 He has had a really rough time recently. 514 00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:25,917 He's been dropped by his record company. And... 515 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:28,070 He's got nowhere else to stay, 516 00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:31,152 and...and it's only going to be for a couple of days, 517 00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:33,993 so you'd just better try and be nice to him. 518 00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:35,991 Are you insane? 519 00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:38,230 Fine. You just get out. 520 00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:40,231 - Me? - Yes. 521 00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:43,949 You said you wanted to move out till we got a divorce. Well, then, fine. 522 00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:46,395 l'll ring you at Pete and Jenny's. 523 00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:56,396 Sleep tight, then, mate. 524 00:32:01,240 --> 00:32:03,196 ♪ Jimmy, Jimmy! 525 00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:06,952 ♪ Jimmy, Jimmy, o-oh 526 00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:08,996 ♪ Jimmy, Jimmy! 527 00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:12,877 ♪ Poor little Jimmy wouldn't let go 528 00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:14,712 PETE: So where have you been sIeeping? 529 00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:18,471 ln the lounge, on beanbags. 530 00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:20,312 Good job you can sleep anywhere. 531 00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,311 Almost anywhere. 532 00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:25,870 - Has Rachel had a word with him yet? - No, and of course l can't say anything, 533 00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,394 though l've tried dropping hints. 534 00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:33,156 (Over backing track) ♪ Our D-l-V-O-R-C-E 535 00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:37,153 ♪ Becomes final today 536 00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:39,196 (Turns stereo off) 537 00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:43,590 He's been with us three days. 538 00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:45,989 How can she not have mentioned it? 539 00:32:46,080 --> 00:32:49,117 - What could they possibly be talking about? - No, not too close. 540 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,795 Keep the grip a hand's length away from the old man. 541 00:33:00,280 --> 00:33:02,714 Not making much progress, are you? 542 00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:07,555 To be honest, l hate golf, but it's the only social life l'm allowed. 543 00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:08,914 Not that l can afford it. 544 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:10,672 l thought you recently had a raise. 545 00:33:10,760 --> 00:33:12,716 Recently had a baby. 546 00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:18,557 Yeah, l'd forgotten how expensive they are. 547 00:33:18,640 --> 00:33:20,551 Tell me about it. 548 00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:24,952 Do you know, they say by the age of 1 8, a child will have cost you a quarter of a million pounds. 549 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,429 That can't include private schools. 550 00:33:27,520 --> 00:33:29,875 - Or bail. - We're not thinking of having another. 551 00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:32,750 Not that we've talked about it. 552 00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:34,671 Well, we're not talking at the moment. 553 00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:37,918 Who'd make the same mistake twice? 554 00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:42,077 Sorry... l forgot you're trying for a second, aren't you? 555 00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:44,037 Well, we were. 556 00:33:44,120 --> 00:33:46,076 Right. Kris. 557 00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:48,239 Adam. 558 00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:52,079 You really don't like him, do you? 559 00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:54,435 You really don't like me, do you? 560 00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:00,396 l'm ready. 561 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:03,594 DAVlD: You reaIIy don't Iike him, do you? 562 00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:07,992 What bugs me most is that he's so...perfect. 563 00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:10,951 First of all, he's fit. 564 00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:12,951 Do you want a hand with that? 565 00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:14,996 l can manage. 566 00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:18,471 Second, he's... 567 00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:22,992 ..the gaIIoping...frigging gourmet. 568 00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:28,556 lt should be ready in about 20. 569 00:34:33,440 --> 00:34:35,351 Excellent. 570 00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:38,512 And third, just to make me feel like a total plank... 571 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,556 (Gentle, melodic strumming) 572 00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:45,228 ..he's become Didsbury's answer to John bIoody Denver. 573 00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:49,154 ♪ You only get one chance in life 574 00:34:49,240 --> 00:34:52,357 ♪ Well, l didn't make it known 575 00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:56,149 ♪ You only get one chance at love 576 00:34:56,240 --> 00:34:59,357 ♪ Well, l didn't take it, yeah 577 00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:05,959 ♪ lf l could, l know exactly what l'd say to you tonight 578 00:35:06,040 --> 00:35:12,354 ♪ Oh, if l could, l wouldn't let you walk away 579 00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,749 ♪ Come what may... 580 00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:16,796 (TV blares) 581 00:35:18,280 --> 00:35:20,191 All in all... 582 00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:22,191 he's everything l'm not. 583 00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:24,350 lncluding married to Rachel. 584 00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:27,557 Excuse me, do you have a calculator, please? 585 00:35:35,840 --> 00:35:37,353 (Sighs) 586 00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:39,355 Jen, 587 00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:41,396 say something to me. 588 00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:44,396 Not now. 589 00:35:46,240 --> 00:35:50,677 Look, l'm sorry for accusing you of giving the baby nappy rash. 590 00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:55,470 Just as l'm sure you didn't mean to imply l love the baby any less than you do. 591 00:36:01,240 --> 00:36:03,196 Jen, what's happened to us? 592 00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:13,116 l thought babies brought couples together, not drove them apart. 593 00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:16,670 Pete, it's so hard being a mum. 594 00:36:17,720 --> 00:36:20,029 l know it is, but you're good at it. 595 00:36:20,120 --> 00:36:21,838 No, l'm not. 596 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:23,638 l'm a failure. 597 00:36:23,720 --> 00:36:26,757 No, l'm a failure, as a husband and a father. 598 00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,757 (Baby cries) - Oh, God. 599 00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:33,798 No, wait. Just let him cry for a little bit. 600 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:38,158 Look, we're talking, aren't we? That's progress, isn't it? 601 00:36:42,240 --> 00:36:45,789 We can't be the first parents to find it difficult. 602 00:36:45,880 --> 00:36:49,190 Everyone else seemed to cope, even my parents. 603 00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:51,236 (Baby continues crying) 604 00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:54,351 Oh, God, Pete. 605 00:36:54,440 --> 00:36:56,351 l love you so much. 606 00:36:56,440 --> 00:37:01,036 And l love our baby. l just wish sometimes that he would just stop... 607 00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:03,076 (Crying stops) 608 00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:08,396 Successful parenting. 609 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:13,756 (Jenny sighs with relief) 610 00:37:18,440 --> 00:37:20,396 l might just check on him. 611 00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:23,396 Yeah. 612 00:37:24,240 --> 00:37:27,118 Kris thinks he might stay in Manchester. 613 00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:31,717 There's more chance of him breaking into the music scene here. 614 00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:35,076 Rachel, you got in touch with Kris to get a divorce. 615 00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:37,390 Now he's practically your lodger! 616 00:37:37,480 --> 00:37:39,436 We wouldn't charge him rent. 617 00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:44,711 Look, it's just temporary. 618 00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:46,711 And besides, he's... 619 00:37:46,800 --> 00:37:49,519 he's reaIIy heIpfuI around the house. 620 00:37:50,240 --> 00:37:52,151 (Flushes) 621 00:37:52,240 --> 00:37:54,390 - There you go. - Adam'll be pleased. 622 00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:55,833 KAREN: And was he? 623 00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:57,239 Ooh. Hang on. 624 00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:58,639 He didn't seem to be. 625 00:37:58,720 --> 00:38:01,917 - Do you think you're being fair to him? - To Adam? 626 00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:05,390 - l've let him move back into the bedroom. - Great. 627 00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:07,951 He...gets on with Kris. 628 00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:09,473 They're almost friends. 629 00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:11,710 They pIay chess together. 630 00:38:13,760 --> 00:38:16,672 Yes! Yes! Yes! 631 00:38:16,760 --> 00:38:19,115 Do you remember that old chestnut - two's company? 632 00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:22,112 - Mrs Marsden... - Thanks. 633 00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:24,111 lt's not like that. 634 00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:26,111 Really? 635 00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:30,111 PETE: Left foot blue! - (Contorted cries) 636 00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:32,111 Kris is the winner! 637 00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:35,033 - Again? - Hey, come on. Another game. 638 00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:38,716 ADAM: l'll get us some more drinks. 639 00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:42,718 KRlS: Do you want another go? - Yeah. 640 00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:46,753 KRlS: Spin. 641 00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:48,751 He seems like a top bloke. 642 00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:50,751 He's a wanker. 643 00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:52,751 He's certainly supple. 644 00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:56,628 Yeah. Exactly. Did you notice it was him suggested Twister? 645 00:38:56,720 --> 00:38:59,518 Adam, nobody else wanted to play chess. 646 00:39:00,560 --> 00:39:02,471 Right hand green. 647 00:39:02,560 --> 00:39:06,473 - (Laughs) Oh, no way! KRlS: No, you've got to. 648 00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:08,232 Hey! What are you at? 649 00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:10,880 - Look, you're pressing down on me. - You're pressing up. 650 00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:13,554 Rach, your arse touched. You're out. 651 00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:14,755 That is not true! 652 00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:17,957 Yeah, both cheeks, didn't they, Pete? Come on. Pack it in. 653 00:39:18,040 --> 00:39:20,759 KRlS: Oh, the undisputed champion. 654 00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:22,796 Yeah, l'll take you up. 655 00:39:24,680 --> 00:39:26,159 - Are you in, Pete? - No. 656 00:39:26,240 --> 00:39:28,959 Oh, no. Just the two of us. One on one. 657 00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:31,756 Mano e mano. 658 00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:37,074 Rach, l think you should come back in. 659 00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:39,071 Why? ls someone hurt? 660 00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:41,071 No, not yet. 661 00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:43,116 Hey, left foot green, Adam. 662 00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:49,115 (Kris chokes) 663 00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:00,510 l think it's time we were going. 664 00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:02,511 Yeah. 665 00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:04,556 Not the only ones. 666 00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:13,230 You put it in a building society? 667 00:40:13,320 --> 00:40:15,595 What's wrong with that? At least there's no risk. 668 00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:16,829 No interest. 669 00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:23,275 So, which esteemed investment house did you entrust with our wealth? 670 00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:25,669 l don't know. lt had a blue carpet. 671 00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:28,593 - That must have swung it for you. - l did shop around. 672 00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:31,035 Well, that we know you're good at. 673 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:34,673 Did you go to the family planning clinic? 674 00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:37,069 No. Still haven't made up my mind. 675 00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:41,119 We cannot afford another child right now. l thought we'd agreed. 676 00:40:41,200 --> 00:40:43,156 We agreed to think about it. 677 00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:46,511 Yeah. 678 00:40:46,600 --> 00:40:48,750 Let's think about it tomorrow. 679 00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:52,116 But, darling, l thought you didn't want any costly mistakes. 680 00:40:52,200 --> 00:40:54,111 Oh, don't worry. 681 00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:58,193 Before l leave a deposit, l can make a timely withdrawal. 682 00:40:58,280 --> 00:41:01,670 But, darling, you pinpointed the problem yourself... 683 00:41:02,720 --> 00:41:04,676 No interest. 684 00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:22,071 Kris. 685 00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:26,119 (Football commentator on TV) - Can l have a word, while Adam's out? 686 00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:27,679 (Volume lowered) 687 00:41:29,840 --> 00:41:32,035 You know how much l've enjoyed having you here. 688 00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:35,516 Yeah, l know you know. 689 00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:39,431 But... 690 00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:41,476 we can't go on like this. 691 00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:44,951 Or at all. 692 00:41:46,040 --> 00:41:49,077 Look, the thing is, l'm really glad we're friends and... 693 00:41:51,720 --> 00:41:53,631 ..l loved you once, but... 694 00:41:53,720 --> 00:41:55,631 l love Adam now. 695 00:41:55,720 --> 00:41:58,951 My future's with him. And l don't want to jeopardise that. 696 00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:07,072 l never told you the real reason l got in touch with you again. 697 00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:09,116 Oh, this isn't easy. 698 00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:12,956 You want a divorce. 699 00:42:15,760 --> 00:42:17,716 lt's all right. No problem. 700 00:42:20,840 --> 00:42:22,796 That was easy. 701 00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:28,073 Oh, the other thing is, you've got to move out. 702 00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:32,073 l know you've got nowhere else to go and that you're broke... 703 00:42:32,160 --> 00:42:34,116 l want to help you with that. 704 00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:38,116 Oh, Rach... 705 00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:40,758 l couldn't. 706 00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:45,391 lt's not a loan. l'm paying you off. Take it and go back to London. 707 00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:51,953 - Don't say you haven't got a price. - lt's not that. lt's just that Rachel... 708 00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:54,076 Look, l don't want to hear it. 709 00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:58,476 OK, then. 710 00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:03,596 Bumstead only has one M. 711 00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:07,596 Oh, sorry. 712 00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:11,111 One other thing. 713 00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:13,270 Rach isn't to know about this, 714 00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:15,271 not ever. 715 00:43:15,360 --> 00:43:17,999 You want this to be just our little secret? 716 00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:19,912 Please. 717 00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:24,513 l wish you wouldn't do this. 718 00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:26,556 l want to. 719 00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:29,191 OK, then. 720 00:43:29,960 --> 00:43:31,518 Thanks. 721 00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:33,192 You're welcome. 722 00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:38,111 Wasn't that game on earlier? 723 00:43:38,200 --> 00:43:40,111 Yeah. 724 00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:42,156 These are the highlights. 725 00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:52,711 Well, bye, then, mate. 726 00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:54,552 Bye. 727 00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:58,756 l'll see you. 728 00:44:01,920 --> 00:44:03,876 (Engine starts) 729 00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,796 Missing you already. 730 00:44:21,040 --> 00:44:22,996 (Phone rings) 731 00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:33,236 (Continues ringing) 732 00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:36,751 Hello? 733 00:44:36,840 --> 00:44:38,353 No, l will not accept the charges! 734 00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:40,590 David! Ramona's mother's ill. 735 00:44:40,680 --> 00:44:42,591 She could be dying. 736 00:44:42,680 --> 00:44:44,591 OK. Put them through. 737 00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:46,591 Ramona! 738 00:44:46,680 --> 00:44:48,079 Telephone! 739 00:44:48,160 --> 00:44:49,673 Surprise, surprise. 740 00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:51,193 Ramona! 741 00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:52,998 Telephone! 742 00:44:56,520 --> 00:44:58,556 Erm, uno momento, por favor. 743 00:45:00,920 --> 00:45:03,354 lf you're looking for your investments, 744 00:45:03,440 --> 00:45:06,318 they're at the bottom of a very long list. 745 00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:11,318 By the way, is your interest paid monthly, 746 00:45:11,400 --> 00:45:13,356 cos l need to buy a stamp. 747 00:45:14,280 --> 00:45:16,714 Don't worry, second class will do. 748 00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:18,711 Qué hay! 749 00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:21,712 No te he visto en demasiado tiempo! 750 00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:23,756 Yo también, my darling! 751 00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:29,273 l don't think her mother could have died. 752 00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:31,271 No. Ramona! 753 00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:33,316 Ramona! 754 00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:50,396 That was fun. 755 00:45:52,440 --> 00:45:54,908 l didn't handle it very well, did l? 756 00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:58,916 No. 757 00:46:01,960 --> 00:46:03,916 Would sorry help at all? 758 00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:07,871 lt might. 759 00:46:07,960 --> 00:46:09,916 Try it. 760 00:46:11,760 --> 00:46:13,716 Adam, l'm sorry. 761 00:46:17,240 --> 00:46:19,196 Come here. 762 00:46:36,440 --> 00:46:38,396 Shall we move in together? 763 00:46:40,440 --> 00:46:42,396 Our house. 764 00:46:44,040 --> 00:46:45,996 ln the middle of our street. 765 00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:55,398 l bet you thought we'd never get rid of him. 766 00:46:55,480 --> 00:46:59,075 - Oh, l thought he might be going today. - Oh, you did, did you? 767 00:46:59,160 --> 00:47:01,993 He had 500 bloody good reasons for going. 768 00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:05,231 - So he told you? - What? 769 00:47:05,320 --> 00:47:07,231 About our arrangement. 770 00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:09,231 What arrangement? 771 00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:11,356 - £500. - That was our arrangement. 772 00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:13,351 - Who? - What? 773 00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:16,352 l gave Kris £500 to go away. 774 00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:18,396 So did l. 775 00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:23,996 Excellent. 776 00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:28,398 There goes one thousand pounds. 777 00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:31,396 There goes our sofa. 778 00:47:34,960 --> 00:47:36,871 This must have set you back a bit. 779 00:47:36,960 --> 00:47:39,110 l thought after the Kris business you were broke. 780 00:47:39,200 --> 00:47:41,111 We are. 781 00:47:41,200 --> 00:47:43,873 Yeah, but some really good friends lent us the money. 782 00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:45,313 (Whispers) Shut up. 783 00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:48,119 l must tell you a story about Karen and money - 784 00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:51,351 how to make a million pounds in as many years. 785 00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:58,076 Well, Karen decided to take a greater interest in our finances - doesn't matter why. 786 00:47:58,160 --> 00:48:00,310 Oh, this is jolly comfortable. 787 00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:03,233 - Anyway... - Oh, shut up, David. 788 00:48:03,320 --> 00:48:06,630 ♪ There once was a girl called Rachel Bradley 789 00:48:06,720 --> 00:48:12,238 ♪ Whose boyfriend loved her truly, deeply...madly 790 00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:15,551 ♪ She was married to Kris with a K 791 00:48:15,640 --> 00:48:21,033 ♪ But now that bollocks with a B has gone away 792 00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:25,591 ♪ So Rachel's now a divorcee 793 00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:28,069 ♪ Living with Adam in Dids-bury 794 00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:32,674 ♪ And Kris with a K, he's now her ex 795 00:48:32,760 --> 00:48:37,515 ♪ So Rachel with an R, can we have some... 796 00:48:37,600 --> 00:48:39,556 Sex. 797 00:48:39,640 --> 00:48:41,596 ♪ SPACE: Female Of The Species 798 00:49:05,440 --> 00:49:09,558 ♪ Oh, how can heaven hold a place for me 799 00:49:09,640 --> 00:49:13,952 ♪ When a girl like you has cast a spell on me? 800 00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:18,352 ♪ Oh, how can heaven hold a place for me 801 00:49:18,440 --> 00:49:23,116 ♪ When a girl like you has cast a spell on me?