1 00:00:08,642 --> 00:00:09,643 Mm... 2 00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:12,313 Oh, I love kissing. 3 00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:14,315 And you know what else? 4 00:00:14,382 --> 00:00:17,951 I think I'm a really great kisser. 5 00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:21,289 So, um... you want to take this inside? 6 00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:23,424 Why? I think we're doing great out here. 7 00:00:23,491 --> 00:00:26,894 Plus, I like making out standing up 8 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:29,130 'cause I don't get a roll over my pants. 9 00:00:29,197 --> 00:00:31,299 Christine, I can't do this again. What? 10 00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:32,733 We've been dating for two months 11 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:34,202 and I've only made it as far as your porch. 12 00:00:34,268 --> 00:00:35,869 Now, is there a problem 13 00:00:35,936 --> 00:00:39,473 or are you just a porch tease? 14 00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:41,142 I told you what the problem is. 15 00:00:41,209 --> 00:00:42,543 My kid is in there. 16 00:00:42,610 --> 00:00:44,712 I've never introduced him to anyone I've dated. 17 00:00:44,778 --> 00:00:46,647 I mean, that is a really big step for me. 18 00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,282 I get that. I understand that. 19 00:00:48,349 --> 00:00:50,451 Look, I'm a dad. I know what a big deal it is. 20 00:00:50,518 --> 00:00:51,585 I let you inside my house. 21 00:00:51,652 --> 00:00:53,554 But, Burton, your kid wasn't there. 22 00:00:53,621 --> 00:00:56,023 I can't just parade random guys 23 00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:57,291 through my eight-year-old's life. 24 00:00:57,358 --> 00:00:59,593 I mean, not that there's been enough guys 25 00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:01,295 to constitute a parade. 26 00:01:01,362 --> 00:01:05,466 More like a circus, but with more clowns. 27 00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:08,502 So, uh, when do you think you might be ready? 28 00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:11,038 Soon. 29 00:01:11,105 --> 00:01:12,773 Yep. Before you know it. Yeah, yeah. 30 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:15,776 Like, right around the corner. Yeah, okay. 31 00:01:15,843 --> 00:01:17,978 All right, I got it. 32 00:01:18,045 --> 00:01:19,012 Well, good night. 33 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,081 Well, good night. 34 00:01:23,851 --> 00:01:24,918 I'm getting inside! 35 00:01:24,985 --> 00:01:26,487 No! No! 36 00:01:26,554 --> 00:01:28,322 Stop! 37 00:01:28,389 --> 00:01:31,459 ( laughing ) 38 00:01:32,660 --> 00:01:35,463 Oh, come on, it hasn't been that bad, has it? 39 00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:38,866 I mean, didn't doing it in your car last week 40 00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:40,568 make you feel like a teenager? 41 00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:43,537 Yeah, until I got home and had to ice... 42 00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:46,174 everything. 43 00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:47,441 No kidding. 44 00:01:47,508 --> 00:01:50,278 I got a bruise from knee to nipple. 45 00:01:52,180 --> 00:01:53,981 This is about taking our relationship 46 00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,949 to the next level. 47 00:01:56,016 --> 00:01:57,518 But I can't. 48 00:01:57,585 --> 00:01:58,452 I'm sorry. 49 00:01:58,519 --> 00:02:00,854 I'm sorry, Burton. Not yet. 50 00:02:00,921 --> 00:02:02,022 Okay. 51 00:02:02,089 --> 00:02:03,224 Well, good night. 52 00:02:03,291 --> 00:02:04,592 Good night. 53 00:02:09,730 --> 00:02:11,932 Thank you. 54 00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:14,268 You're a wonderful man. 55 00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:18,606 You deserve a fantastic kisser like me. 56 00:02:19,907 --> 00:02:21,975 Go away. 57 00:02:22,042 --> 00:02:24,077 That's all you're getting tonight. 58 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,046 We're closed. 59 00:02:26,113 --> 00:02:29,183 But we open tomorrow at 9:00. 60 00:02:30,218 --> 00:02:31,685 Get here early 61 00:02:31,752 --> 00:02:35,256 before all the good stuff is picked over. 62 00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:38,626 ( kissing ) 63 00:02:44,097 --> 00:02:45,866 Hi. 64 00:02:45,933 --> 00:02:46,900 Who's she? 65 00:02:46,967 --> 00:02:48,101 That's my sister. 66 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:49,203 She used to be married to him. 67 00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:50,271 Now he goes out with her. 68 00:02:50,338 --> 00:02:52,673 And she's an awkward dater. 69 00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:54,875 Want to throw some egg rolls out on the lawn for Burton? 70 00:02:54,942 --> 00:02:57,144 Who's Burton? That's the guy she's been seeing. 71 00:02:57,211 --> 00:02:59,847 She doesn't want to introduce him to Ritchie. Who's Ritchie? 72 00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:01,782 Oh, I'm sorry, he's my son. 73 00:03:01,849 --> 00:03:03,417 Who are you? 74 00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:06,119 This is my girlfriend, Michelle. 75 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,588 Oh, girlfriend? 76 00:03:07,655 --> 00:03:08,989 Wow. When did that happen? 77 00:03:09,056 --> 00:03:11,725 About noon. 78 00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:12,993 So you're still not 79 00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,228 letting Burton in the house? 80 00:03:14,295 --> 00:03:15,996 I can't. It's not good for Ritchie. 81 00:03:16,063 --> 00:03:17,465 Is that it? 82 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,900 Or are you just using Ritchie as a human shield 83 00:03:19,967 --> 00:03:22,770 to keep your relationship from moving forward? 84 00:03:22,836 --> 00:03:23,971 Oh. 85 00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:28,576 Uh, Matthew, I am not really comfortable 86 00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:32,713 discussing my personal life in mixed company. 87 00:03:34,382 --> 00:03:35,749 Christine... 88 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,718 you can't leave Burton out there forever. 89 00:03:37,785 --> 00:03:39,987 You don't want to be a porch tease. 90 00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:43,957 Wait a minute, is that really a thing? 91 00:03:44,024 --> 00:03:44,958 No, we were listening. 92 00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:46,694 Oh, God! 93 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:47,761 Oh, my God. 94 00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:49,463 I thought you liked him. 95 00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:51,031 And if you keep him out on the porch much longer, 96 00:03:51,098 --> 00:03:52,132 you're going to lose him. 97 00:03:52,199 --> 00:03:53,334 No, I'm not. 98 00:03:53,401 --> 00:03:55,102 Burton's totally fine with it. 99 00:03:55,168 --> 00:03:56,637 He wants me to take my time. 100 00:03:56,704 --> 00:03:57,938 No, he doesn't. 101 00:03:58,005 --> 00:03:59,640 Guys need to know they're moving towards a goal. 102 00:03:59,707 --> 00:04:01,041 They need to know when they're winning. 103 00:04:01,108 --> 00:04:02,876 It's why we like sports. 104 00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:04,845 And war. 105 00:04:04,912 --> 00:04:06,714 Well, he's not going to break up with me 106 00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:09,917 just because I'm not ready to move forward. Is he? 107 00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:11,452 Men don't like stop signs. 108 00:04:11,519 --> 00:04:12,753 They like green lights. 109 00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:15,088 And war. 110 00:04:15,155 --> 00:04:16,357 You know, Richard was nervous 111 00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:17,925 about introducing me to Ritchie, 112 00:04:17,991 --> 00:04:19,660 but at some point you just have to take the leap 113 00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:21,495 and know that he's going to be okay. 114 00:04:21,562 --> 00:04:22,796 He's a great kid. 115 00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:23,997 You're a great mom. 116 00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:25,766 Oh, thank you. 117 00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:27,368 Yeah, like, now Ritchie and I get along great. 118 00:04:27,435 --> 00:04:28,969 We laugh at each other's jokes, 119 00:04:29,036 --> 00:04:31,572 we have these really cute nicknames for each other... 120 00:04:31,639 --> 00:04:33,040 Yeah, I said thank you. 121 00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:42,015 Mom? 122 00:04:43,351 --> 00:04:45,819 Oh, hi, sweetie. 123 00:04:45,886 --> 00:04:48,055 You're up. 124 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:50,290 How was your night? 125 00:04:50,358 --> 00:04:51,892 It was good. 126 00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:53,394 I saw a dead mouse. 127 00:04:53,461 --> 00:04:55,663 Sorry I missed that. 128 00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:57,130 You didn't. 129 00:04:57,197 --> 00:04:58,265 I kept it. 130 00:04:58,332 --> 00:04:59,400 Oh. 131 00:04:59,467 --> 00:05:02,169 Even better. 132 00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:03,837 Listen, sweetie, 133 00:05:03,904 --> 00:05:05,839 I want to talk to you about something, okay? 134 00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:08,175 You know how you have a best friend at school? 135 00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:09,443 Austin? Mm-hmm. 136 00:05:09,510 --> 00:05:12,079 Well, Mommy has a best friend, too. 137 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,382 And his name is Burton 138 00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:16,717 Does he pick his nose? 139 00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,386 I hope not. 140 00:05:18,452 --> 00:05:20,788 Does he teach you dirty words? 141 00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:25,393 A couple. 142 00:05:25,459 --> 00:05:27,728 But he's a very nice man. 143 00:05:27,795 --> 00:05:30,531 And I would like for you to meet him. 144 00:05:30,598 --> 00:05:32,199 But only if you would like to meet him. 145 00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:33,667 Would you like to meet him? 146 00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:35,403 No. 147 00:05:35,469 --> 00:05:38,338 Well, he would like to meet you. 148 00:05:38,406 --> 00:05:40,441 And I would like for you to meet him. 149 00:05:40,508 --> 00:05:41,809 So what do you think? 150 00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:44,445 No, thanks. Well, you're going to meet him. 151 00:05:44,512 --> 00:05:46,480 And if you don't like him, 152 00:05:46,547 --> 00:05:47,648 you don't have to see him again. 153 00:05:47,715 --> 00:05:49,817 Okay. Okay. All right. 154 00:05:49,883 --> 00:05:50,784 Well, go to sleep now, sweetie. 155 00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:52,152 It's late. Okay? 156 00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:54,888 We can talk about this more in the morning if you want to. 157 00:05:54,955 --> 00:05:57,658 I don't want to. We'll talk about it more in the morning. 158 00:05:57,725 --> 00:05:59,827 I love you, darling. Night. Night. 159 00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:03,831 Oh, God. 160 00:06:14,241 --> 00:06:15,208 What are you doing? 161 00:06:15,275 --> 00:06:16,243 Cleaning. 162 00:06:16,309 --> 00:06:17,545 Why? 163 00:06:17,611 --> 00:06:20,013 Is Mom coming? 164 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:21,915 Tell her I'm not here. I'm studying for the bar. 165 00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:24,217 Oh, no, what did we tell her last time? 166 00:06:24,284 --> 00:06:26,386 Law school? Med school? What?! 167 00:06:26,454 --> 00:06:28,422 Matthew, pull yourself together. 168 00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:29,890 Mom is not coming. 169 00:06:29,957 --> 00:06:33,661 I'm tidying up so Burton doesn't think I'm a slob. 170 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:34,662 Oh, God. 171 00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,129 Why am I bothering to do this? 172 00:06:36,196 --> 00:06:38,098 I'm not going to pretend to be somebody I'm not. 173 00:06:38,165 --> 00:06:40,333 He can either take me the way I am, 174 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:41,902 or not at all. 175 00:06:41,969 --> 00:06:44,004 Wow, you will really go to any length 176 00:06:44,071 --> 00:06:46,039 to justify not cleaning. 177 00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:49,543 I know, right? 178 00:06:49,610 --> 00:06:51,211 ( doorbell rings ) 179 00:06:51,278 --> 00:06:52,279 Oh, God. 180 00:06:52,345 --> 00:06:53,547 Okay, uh... yeah. 181 00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:55,282 Just a second. 182 00:06:55,348 --> 00:06:57,084 Ritchie...! 183 00:06:58,185 --> 00:06:59,319 Ooh, look at you. 184 00:06:59,386 --> 00:07:00,921 You look adorable. 185 00:07:00,988 --> 00:07:02,055 Honey, don't scratch. 186 00:07:02,122 --> 00:07:04,291 Burton's going to think you have fleas. 187 00:07:04,357 --> 00:07:05,493 ( doorbell rings ) 188 00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:06,927 Coming! Honey, you're not nervous 189 00:07:06,994 --> 00:07:08,195 are you, about meeting Mommy's new friend? 190 00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,229 What friend? 191 00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:10,598 I thought Grandma was coming. 192 00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:13,366 Wait! Is she or is she not coming?! 193 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,235 Would everybody please relax? 194 00:07:15,302 --> 00:07:16,537 This is supposed to be fun. 195 00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:19,006 Aren't you having fun? I'm having fun. 196 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:22,175 Hi. 197 00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:23,677 Wow, you look great. 198 00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:24,645 Are you ready? I'm ready. 199 00:07:24,712 --> 00:07:25,846 How was your day? 200 00:07:25,913 --> 00:07:27,481 Uh, not so good. My mom actually got 201 00:07:27,548 --> 00:07:28,949 into a little bit of a car accident. 202 00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:30,884 Okay, let's go. 203 00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:32,653 Ritchie, I'd like you to meet 204 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:34,254 my friend, Burton. 205 00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:36,490 Are you my new dad? 206 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:40,894 Wow, that must've been a tough delivery. 207 00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:46,466 No, that's my idiot brother, Matthew. 208 00:07:46,534 --> 00:07:47,735 Idiot! 209 00:07:48,769 --> 00:07:50,538 Where is Ritchie? Bathroom. 210 00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:52,540 Okay, out, out, out, out. 211 00:07:54,742 --> 00:07:56,777 I don't know why I was in such a hurry 212 00:07:56,844 --> 00:07:59,079 to get in the house, it wasn't that great. 213 00:07:59,146 --> 00:08:00,614 Yeah, I probably should've cleaned it, 214 00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:03,116 but Matthew talked me out of it. 215 00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:04,918 Hey, what were you saying about your mother? 216 00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:06,654 Oh, yeah, she got in an accident. 217 00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:07,755 She's fine, but the other driver... 218 00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:09,657 Oh, okay, he's back. Come on. 219 00:08:10,658 --> 00:08:13,293 Ritchie, this is my friend 220 00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:14,595 Burton. 221 00:08:14,662 --> 00:08:16,830 Hi, Ritchie. 222 00:08:16,897 --> 00:08:17,798 Hi. 223 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,401 My pants itch. 224 00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:22,870 Can I go change? 225 00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:24,805 Yes. 226 00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:25,906 Of course. 227 00:08:30,477 --> 00:08:33,246 Oh, my God. 228 00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:34,648 That went great! 229 00:08:34,715 --> 00:08:36,817 That was so much better than I expected. 230 00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,986 What exactly did you expect? 231 00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:41,321 Oh, you know, tears, tantrums. 232 00:08:41,388 --> 00:08:42,890 Maybe somebody yelling, 233 00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:46,727 "You can't tell me what to do, you're not my father." 234 00:08:46,794 --> 00:08:50,130 Plus I had no idea how Ritchie was going to react. 235 00:08:51,198 --> 00:08:54,334 So can I go now? My pants itch, too. 236 00:08:54,401 --> 00:08:55,603 Yes, you're excused. 237 00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:57,705 You were a big help. I'll tell Mom. 238 00:08:57,771 --> 00:09:00,574 I'd really appreciate that. 239 00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:01,742 Nice to finally meet you, Matthew. 240 00:09:01,809 --> 00:09:03,644 Oh, no, the pleasure is all mine. 241 00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:04,878 Really, I can't thank you enough 242 00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:07,314 for taking the old gal off my hands. 243 00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,251 So... 244 00:09:11,318 --> 00:09:13,453 You're in. 245 00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:14,521 How does it feel? 246 00:09:14,588 --> 00:09:15,856 The way you were guarding it, 247 00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:17,658 I kind of thought it'd be a lot fancier. 248 00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:20,560 Maybe some gold columns and white tigers. 249 00:09:20,628 --> 00:09:21,561 ( chuckles ) 250 00:09:21,629 --> 00:09:23,997 But it's nice. 251 00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,565 This is big. 252 00:09:25,633 --> 00:09:28,468 I really feel like we've crossed over into new territory. 253 00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:29,837 I was so nervous about it, 254 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,672 but now that it's done, 255 00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:33,874 I really feel like it was the right move. 256 00:09:33,941 --> 00:09:36,409 Me, too. 257 00:09:36,476 --> 00:09:39,713 So, speaking of big steps, 258 00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:41,381 when do I get to meet your kid? 259 00:09:41,448 --> 00:09:44,384 Oh, yeah, yeah, one of these days. 260 00:09:44,451 --> 00:09:47,120 You know, when the time is right. 261 00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:56,764 Unbelievable! 262 00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:09,242 Unbelievable! 263 00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:10,410 What? 264 00:10:10,477 --> 00:10:11,745 I showed him mine. 265 00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:14,848 Now he won't show me his. 266 00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:18,051 I hope to God you're talking about your boobs. 267 00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:20,087 No, my kid. 268 00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:21,755 I introduce Burton to Ritchie, 269 00:10:21,822 --> 00:10:23,924 and then when I mention meeting his kid, 270 00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:26,093 he says, "When the time is right." 271 00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:28,295 What the hell is that supposed to mean? 272 00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:29,663 I guess he's not ready. 273 00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:30,998 But this was supposed to be 274 00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,232 a milestone in our relationship. 275 00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:33,834 I mean, I was under the impression 276 00:10:33,901 --> 00:10:35,435 that the feeling was mutual. 277 00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:38,872 He was practically begging me to get inside my house. 278 00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:40,540 I hope to God you're talking about your... 279 00:10:40,607 --> 00:10:41,742 Oh, shut up. 280 00:10:42,843 --> 00:10:45,345 This is so embarrassing. 281 00:10:45,412 --> 00:10:47,848 I mean, it's like I said, "I love you" 282 00:10:47,915 --> 00:10:49,182 and he said, "Thank you." 283 00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:52,319 Well, it's better than "I bet you do." 284 00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:54,321 I mean, he was acting as if he was ready 285 00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:55,823 to move to the next step, 286 00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:57,758 and now, he thinks I'm moving too fast? 287 00:10:57,825 --> 00:10:58,959 I mean... 288 00:10:59,026 --> 00:11:00,660 What is wrong with men? 289 00:11:00,728 --> 00:11:01,929 They make everything too complicated. 290 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:02,963 Well, talk to him. 291 00:11:03,030 --> 00:11:04,397 No. 'Cause then he'll think 292 00:11:04,464 --> 00:11:06,900 that I need him to tell me how much he likes me 293 00:11:06,967 --> 00:11:08,936 and I want him to tell me how much he likes me 294 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:12,105 without him knowing that I need him to tell me that. 295 00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:15,876 Yeah, men are complicated. 296 00:11:16,744 --> 00:11:18,545 Yeah. You know what? 297 00:11:18,611 --> 00:11:20,113 I'm just going to talk to him. 298 00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,515 I'm gonna see what he's thinking. I'm so confused. 299 00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:23,751 Probably would have been easier 300 00:11:23,817 --> 00:11:26,486 if you just showed him your boobs. 301 00:11:26,553 --> 00:11:27,687 Yeah, no kidding. 302 00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:30,223 I always forget I have these things. 303 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,896 ( doorbell ringing ) 304 00:11:38,631 --> 00:11:39,632 Hey, stranger. 305 00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:42,069 Yeah. Uh... Hey. 306 00:11:42,135 --> 00:11:43,403 Um... 307 00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:47,107 I'm a little bit confused about what just happened. 308 00:11:47,174 --> 00:11:49,309 I really thought that we are on the same page 309 00:11:49,376 --> 00:11:51,779 about our relationship, and where it was going, 310 00:11:51,845 --> 00:11:55,348 but, uh, clearly I was wrong. 311 00:11:55,415 --> 00:11:56,349 What do you mean? 312 00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:57,550 Do you want to come inside? 313 00:11:57,617 --> 00:11:59,119 Oh, no, no, no. 314 00:11:59,186 --> 00:12:01,221 I don't want to move things forward too quickly. 315 00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:03,356 I should probably stay out here on the porch 316 00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:05,592 and come in when the time is right. 317 00:12:05,658 --> 00:12:08,896 You know, "one of these days." 318 00:12:08,962 --> 00:12:10,964 Christine, I don't know what you're talking about. 319 00:12:11,031 --> 00:12:14,067 Why are you hiding your kid from me?! 320 00:12:14,134 --> 00:12:14,902 What? 321 00:12:14,968 --> 00:12:16,804 Yeah, I showed you my kid. 322 00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:18,405 Now you won't show me yours? 323 00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:21,374 I mean, are you not serious about this relationship, Burton? 324 00:12:21,441 --> 00:12:27,580 Because if you're not, we can end it right now. 325 00:12:27,647 --> 00:12:31,084 Stevie is in Montana with his mother. 326 00:12:31,151 --> 00:12:33,486 He won't be back for another six weeks. 327 00:12:33,553 --> 00:12:36,089 I thought you could meet then. 328 00:12:38,158 --> 00:12:39,126 Oh. 329 00:12:41,461 --> 00:12:44,965 So when you said, "When the time is right" you meant... 330 00:12:45,032 --> 00:12:46,366 When he's in the same state. 331 00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:48,601 Oh. Yes. Yes. 332 00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:52,005 Well... that's what I thought. 333 00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:56,309 I just wanted to storm over here and make sure. 334 00:12:56,376 --> 00:12:58,111 Christine... come on! 335 00:12:58,178 --> 00:13:00,313 Come on. I don't want to hide Stevie from you. 336 00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:02,049 I don't want to hide anything from you. 337 00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:04,551 Of course I want you to meet him. 338 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:05,785 Really? 339 00:13:05,853 --> 00:13:07,855 Of course, baby. 340 00:13:08,989 --> 00:13:11,124 I love you. 341 00:13:14,527 --> 00:13:17,230 I bet you do. 342 00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:30,777 Oh. Good, you're all here. 343 00:13:30,844 --> 00:13:33,080 Sorry, we stopped by to say hi, but... 344 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:36,216 then we ordered a movie on Pay-Per-View. 345 00:13:38,986 --> 00:13:41,254 My God, that woman is naked. 346 00:13:42,622 --> 00:13:44,057 Yeah, there's a lot of nudity in this. 347 00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:45,725 That's why we ordered it here. 348 00:13:45,792 --> 00:13:49,296 We didn't want Richard's cable company to think we're pervs. 349 00:13:53,867 --> 00:13:55,502 You want to watch with us? 350 00:13:55,568 --> 00:13:57,337 Oh, no, thanks, Michelle. 351 00:13:57,404 --> 00:13:59,339 Not Michelle. 352 00:14:00,773 --> 00:14:03,043 You know, for a guy who does nothing all day, 353 00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:05,112 you do all right. 354 00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:09,049 So I heard you introduced Ritchie to Burton today. 355 00:14:09,116 --> 00:14:10,650 How'd that go? Good. 356 00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:11,952 He said he loved me. 357 00:14:12,019 --> 00:14:13,020 ALL: Aww... 358 00:14:13,086 --> 00:14:14,787 I said, "I bet you do." 359 00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:16,256 ( all gasp ) 360 00:14:19,226 --> 00:14:20,627 I know. 361 00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:23,363 I'm a horrible person. 362 00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:35,808 So... 363 00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:36,910 "I bet you do." 364 00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,245 Brutal. 365 00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:41,614 I know. 366 00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:43,483 I wasn't expecting it. 367 00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:44,484 I thought you liked him. 368 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:45,518 I do. 369 00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:46,553 But, you don't love him? 370 00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:47,554 I don't know. 371 00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:48,821 How am I supposed to know? 372 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:49,822 Do I love him? 373 00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:50,890 Should I love him? 374 00:14:50,958 --> 00:14:53,293 Do you love him? 375 00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:55,996 Christine, it shouldn't be this hard. 376 00:14:56,063 --> 00:14:58,065 I told you I loved you on our first date 377 00:14:58,131 --> 00:14:59,666 and you said it back to me. 378 00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:00,900 We were 22. 379 00:15:00,968 --> 00:15:02,502 I'd just seen Ghost. 380 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:05,838 I would have told the movie usher I loved him. 381 00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:07,807 Good to know our marriage was built 382 00:15:07,874 --> 00:15:10,177 on such a rock-solid foundation. 383 00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:11,878 Oh, come on. It worked out okay 384 00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:14,982 except for the divorce. 385 00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,085 Maybe you're just afraid 386 00:15:18,151 --> 00:15:20,853 and you're keeping yourself from loving him. 387 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,589 Am I doing that? 388 00:15:22,655 --> 00:15:23,856 Should I be doing that? 389 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,093 Do you ever do that? 390 00:15:26,159 --> 00:15:28,061 Have you eaten today? 391 00:15:28,828 --> 00:15:30,197 I don't know. 392 00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:32,565 I mean, of course I'm afraid. 393 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:33,600 I'm so scared, you know. 394 00:15:33,666 --> 00:15:36,236 What if I fall in love with Burton 395 00:15:36,303 --> 00:15:39,239 and then ten years down the road the whole thing falls apart? 396 00:15:39,306 --> 00:15:42,109 If you don't try, you'll never know. 397 00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:43,410 Do you like the guy? 398 00:15:43,476 --> 00:15:45,012 Very much. 399 00:15:45,078 --> 00:15:46,046 Is he nice to you? 400 00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:47,380 So nice. 401 00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,984 But not so nice it makes me not like him anymore. 402 00:15:51,051 --> 00:15:53,620 What did your parents do to you? 403 00:15:58,225 --> 00:16:00,360 You know. You spent Christmas with them. 404 00:16:00,427 --> 00:16:01,694 Yeah, yeah. 405 00:16:01,761 --> 00:16:03,063 God, you know... 406 00:16:03,130 --> 00:16:05,232 Burton and I have a great time together. 407 00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:08,801 You know, he's nice, he's funny, he's smart, he's handsome 408 00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:10,537 and what's not to love? 409 00:16:10,603 --> 00:16:12,005 I don't know. 410 00:16:14,707 --> 00:16:16,943 Yeah, maybe you're right. 411 00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:19,512 I'm just scared. 412 00:16:19,579 --> 00:16:21,548 I do love him. 413 00:16:21,614 --> 00:16:23,450 Then tell him. 414 00:16:25,585 --> 00:16:27,120 I will. 415 00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:33,260 Where you going? 416 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:36,296 To tell Burton I love him. 417 00:16:38,865 --> 00:16:40,167 ( doorbell rings ) 418 00:16:44,404 --> 00:16:47,740 We have got to get you a telephone. 419 00:16:47,807 --> 00:16:48,975 I know. 420 00:16:49,042 --> 00:16:51,211 But, I have to tell you something 421 00:16:51,278 --> 00:16:53,046 and it's the kind of something 422 00:16:53,113 --> 00:16:54,614 that should only be said in person, 423 00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:59,086 or on a giant screen at a baseball game. 424 00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:00,153 I can hardly wait. 425 00:17:00,220 --> 00:17:02,455 Oh... Burton, 426 00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:05,325 I'm so sorry I freaked out before. 427 00:17:05,392 --> 00:17:07,460 I, I... When you said "I love you," 428 00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:10,130 I didn't mean to say, "I bet you do." 429 00:17:10,197 --> 00:17:12,265 I don't know why that came out of my mouth. 430 00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:15,735 What I really meant to say was, I... 431 00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:20,307 don't think I can see you anymore. 432 00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:23,576 Wow. 433 00:17:23,643 --> 00:17:25,445 I'm so glad you didn't put that 434 00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:29,316 on a giant screen at a baseball game. 435 00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:32,485 I, uh, I thought you were going to say, "I love you." 436 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,754 Oh, my God. 437 00:17:34,821 --> 00:17:36,156 So did I. 438 00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:38,591 Tha-Tha-That's what I came over here to say. 439 00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:40,227 I meant to say that... 440 00:17:40,293 --> 00:17:42,295 but I can't. 441 00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:44,997 I guess I don't love you. 442 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:46,733 Yeah, I'm getting that. 443 00:17:49,336 --> 00:17:52,239 You know, it was implied with the "I bet you do," 444 00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:54,141 and then you, uh, you really drove it home 445 00:17:54,207 --> 00:17:57,110 with the, "I don't want to see you anymore." 446 00:17:57,177 --> 00:18:01,281 I guess that was why I was keeping you out on the porch. 447 00:18:02,715 --> 00:18:04,884 I said it was for Ritchie, but it wasn't. 448 00:18:04,951 --> 00:18:07,454 It was for me. 449 00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:09,789 So... 450 00:18:11,124 --> 00:18:13,260 What are we doing? 451 00:18:14,894 --> 00:18:16,629 I don't know. 452 00:18:16,696 --> 00:18:19,499 Why don't we go back to the way it was before? 453 00:18:19,566 --> 00:18:20,900 On the porch. I love the porch. 454 00:18:20,967 --> 00:18:22,169 We can't go 455 00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:24,070 back to the porch. We moved past the porch. 456 00:18:24,137 --> 00:18:25,372 But it was so good on the porch. 457 00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:27,006 I can't go back to the porch, 458 00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:29,842 and I can't say "porch" anymore. 459 00:18:29,909 --> 00:18:33,746 Christine, I'm done with dating. 460 00:18:33,813 --> 00:18:35,014 I want to settle down. 461 00:18:35,081 --> 00:18:37,484 Be with one person. 462 00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:40,420 And I was hoping it was you. 463 00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:45,292 Burton, I really would do anything 464 00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:47,760 not to hurt your feelings, I just... 465 00:18:47,827 --> 00:18:50,630 I-I get it. I get it. 466 00:18:50,697 --> 00:18:54,767 I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sad, but, I understand. 467 00:18:56,703 --> 00:19:00,707 You're the most incredible woman I've ever been with 468 00:19:00,773 --> 00:19:05,545 and, um... when you are ready, 469 00:19:05,612 --> 00:19:08,548 that person's going to be the luckiest man alive. 470 00:19:09,849 --> 00:19:11,150 Bye, Christine. 471 00:19:21,027 --> 00:19:22,895 Do I love him? 472 00:19:30,603 --> 00:19:32,138 You know how we're talking about friendship the other night? 473 00:19:32,205 --> 00:19:33,473 Yeah. 474 00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:36,209 Okay. Well, the thing about friendship is, 475 00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:39,412 sometimes you're friends with people forever, 476 00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:41,581 and sometimes they come into your life 477 00:19:41,648 --> 00:19:43,283 and they make you feel good about yourself 478 00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:47,854 and they teach you a few new words, 479 00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,322 and then you move on. 480 00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:51,391 But I like Austin. I don't want to move on. 481 00:19:51,458 --> 00:19:53,493 Oh, no, no, no, you can be friends with Austin. 482 00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:57,196 I mean, he picks his nose, but you play with dead mice, 483 00:19:57,264 --> 00:20:00,367 so his mom's probably not thrilled either. 484 00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:02,702 Anyway, Ritchie, what I'm trying to say 485 00:20:02,769 --> 00:20:06,005 is that sometimes people come into your life to stay 486 00:20:06,072 --> 00:20:08,775 and sometimes they're just passing through. 487 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:09,809 Mom... 488 00:20:09,876 --> 00:20:11,143 Can I go to sleep? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 489 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:12,144 I'm almost there. 490 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:15,081 Hang on, sweetie. Um... 491 00:20:15,147 --> 00:20:16,983 Darling, listen. 492 00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:22,589 Burton's not going to be coming around anymore. 493 00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:24,791 He's a great guy, 494 00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:27,994 and he really liked meeting you, 495 00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:31,531 but he's one of Mommy's friends that's moving on, 496 00:20:31,598 --> 00:20:34,200 and everybody's okay. 497 00:20:34,267 --> 00:20:35,234 Are you okay? 498 00:20:35,302 --> 00:20:36,536 I'm okay. 499 00:20:36,603 --> 00:20:39,639 Good. 500 00:20:39,706 --> 00:20:41,240 Is there anything you want to ask me? 501 00:20:41,308 --> 00:20:42,342 Mm-hmm. 502 00:20:42,409 --> 00:20:43,543 Who's Burton? 503 00:20:48,214 --> 00:20:50,583 Good night, sweetheart.