1
00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:10,218
I guess if I'm honest, I was
a tiny bit nervous at the beginning
2
00:00:10,301 --> 00:00:13,722
but, you know,
with a new state, new school,
3
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:17,183
new allergist to get up to speed...
4
00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:19,269
but now I love college.
5
00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:21,438
And, I mean, the pressure was on, too,
6
00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:24,899
because my mom met my Aunt Stacy
the first week of freshman year,
7
00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:27,569
and I really wanted my own own Aunt Stacy.
8
00:00:27,652 --> 00:00:31,197
Turns out me introducing myself
door-to-door was really crucial,
9
00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:35,410
despite, you know, some
of the rudeness and the occasional nudity.
10
00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:39,205
I don't just have one Aunt Stacy.
I have several.
11
00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:43,543
Wait, you have more than one Aunt Stacy?
How do you keep their birthdays straight?
12
00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:46,504
No, Sam, you lost the thread.
13
00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:48,131
I'm talking about college friends.
14
00:00:48,673 --> 00:00:52,343
I mean, what about you? You've not even
talked about your new Denton friends.
15
00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:54,763
That's because I don't have any,
because I don't need any.
16
00:00:54,846 --> 00:00:57,057
Sam, that's absurd!
17
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:58,767
Of course you do.
18
00:00:59,642 --> 00:01:03,646
Listen, you're just a little gun-shy
because of the whole Tasty Trio debacle,
19
00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:06,399
but we all need as many friends
as we can get.
20
00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:09,486
Not me. I already have
my real friends, like Zahid.
21
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:11,362
Zahid's only one friend.
22
00:01:11,446 --> 00:01:13,114
So, I'm only one Sam.
23
00:01:14,282 --> 00:01:17,660
What about me? I'm the one you truly love.
24
00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:20,747
- I told you not to touch my tortoise!
- I know. That's why I do it.
25
00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:22,290
Ow! Get out!
26
00:01:24,375 --> 00:01:27,212
I have to go. Edison needs me
to put on some soothing music.
27
00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:30,381
This is why you need more friends.
28
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:31,465
Bye, Paige.
29
00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:35,470
Oh, there you are.
30
00:01:35,553 --> 00:01:37,889
I heard a flush, then you never came out.
31
00:01:37,972 --> 00:01:39,224
I thought I lost you for good.
32
00:01:39,307 --> 00:01:40,600
Sorry, I peed,
33
00:01:40,683 --> 00:01:43,645
but then I heard Sam talking to Paige,
so I had to go mess with him.
34
00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:46,397
Well, obviously.
35
00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:47,315
Who is that?
36
00:01:47,398 --> 00:01:48,817
Secret girlfriend.
37
00:01:50,902 --> 00:01:54,072
- What is up with Beth?
- She wants to go see Dewey.
38
00:01:54,864 --> 00:01:57,033
He's our dog, lives in New Hampshire.
39
00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:58,618
Shut up. You have a dog?
40
00:01:58,701 --> 00:02:00,703
- Mm-hmm.
- What is he doing in New Hampshire?
41
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:03,331
You know, sniffing butts,
42
00:02:03,832 --> 00:02:07,377
barking at mailmen,
just typical canine activity.
43
00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:09,629
He lives with our dad.
44
00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:11,256
Oh.
45
00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:14,175
And I guess he's not doing too well.
46
00:02:14,259 --> 00:02:15,176
Dewey or your dad?
47
00:02:15,260 --> 00:02:18,179
- Well, Dewey, unfortunately.
- Oh.
48
00:02:19,305 --> 00:02:21,182
And Beth wants to go visit him
one last time.
49
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,143
What about you?
50
00:02:23,226 --> 00:02:25,061
Yeah, I mean...
51
00:02:26,479 --> 00:02:30,567
it's just every time I visit my dad,
I feel like I'm 13 years old.
52
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,361
I just end up yelling at him.
And you know me.
53
00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:35,363
I'm not a yeller.
54
00:02:35,446 --> 00:02:36,823
No, you are not.
55
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:39,117
He just brings out the worst in me.
56
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:43,246
Yeah, I have no idea what that's like.
Elsa makes me my best self.
57
00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:45,415
Do you want me to come with you?
58
00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:49,127
I'll help you stay calm
in the face of parental stupidity.
59
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:54,132
- You?
- I'm a certified Zen master. So you know.
60
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:57,010
Okay, what is that?
61
00:02:57,093 --> 00:02:58,553
Oh, this cool thing?
62
00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:01,347
This just means parents are dumb,
63
00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:02,765
let's not get worked up about it.
64
00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:04,809
- Oh, is that what that is?
- Yes.
65
00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,896
So when you see this,
you know it's time to just relax,
66
00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:10,607
kick back and chill.
67
00:03:11,357 --> 00:03:12,525
Okay.
68
00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:15,403
Yeah, you can come, only 'cause
you're dumb and you make me laugh.
69
00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:16,696
I'll take it.
70
00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:28,708
Tortoises are solitary animals.
71
00:03:28,791 --> 00:03:31,586
They don't need companionship
like other animals.
72
00:03:31,669 --> 00:03:32,962
They're happy alone.
73
00:03:33,671 --> 00:03:35,298
In fact, in captivity,
74
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:38,843
no more than five tortoises can be kept
in the same enclosure.
75
00:03:39,427 --> 00:03:43,723
Otherwise, they get aggressive,
and it becomes total tortoise mayhem.
76
00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:46,935
My pencil.
77
00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,937
Night, Sam. Don't stay too late.
78
00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:52,315
The night janitor gets really talky. Sam.
79
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:56,736
You okay, dude?
You're aura's a little hectic.
80
00:03:56,819 --> 00:03:58,988
Somebody stole my 9B pencil!
81
00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:02,283
Oh, boy, no bueno.
You think you misplaced it?
82
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,118
What?
83
00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:06,246
No, of course I didn't misplace it.
84
00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:09,207
How would I have misplaced it?
It's a really important pencil.
85
00:04:09,874 --> 00:04:11,918
They all are. I get it.
86
00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:15,713
I lost one of my pastels once
and drove into a tree.
87
00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:17,506
Burnt umber.
88
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:20,927
Maybe it was an accident.
Did someone come near your workplace?
89
00:04:21,552 --> 00:04:24,472
Light blue Converse. Light blue Converse.
90
00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:27,225
Never did find that pastel.
91
00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:30,603
I mean, I got a replacement,
but it was never as good.
92
00:04:30,687 --> 00:04:32,981
Light blue Converse. Light blue Converse.
93
00:04:35,316 --> 00:04:38,653
9B. That's a good pencil.
94
00:04:57,255 --> 00:05:00,383
Hey, you stole my 9B pencil.
95
00:05:00,466 --> 00:05:01,884
No, I didn't.
96
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,136
I asked if I could borrow it
97
00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:04,470
and you just kind of grunted,
98
00:05:04,554 --> 00:05:06,973
which I thought that yes,
so I borrowed it.
99
00:05:07,056 --> 00:05:09,309
Then I told you
I was putting it back in the soft case
100
00:05:09,392 --> 00:05:11,519
because that graphite does better
in a soft container.
101
00:05:11,602 --> 00:05:13,730
You grunted again,
so I thought you were cool with it.
102
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:15,982
I don't remember any of that.
103
00:05:16,816 --> 00:05:17,734
Okay, bye.
104
00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:20,862
You know,
it's pretty cool watching you draw.
105
00:05:20,945 --> 00:05:23,990
You get really into it.
Like you have tunnel vision or something.
106
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:25,073
Thank you.
107
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:30,038
I'm Abby. Who are you?
108
00:05:30,121 --> 00:05:31,331
I'm Sam Gardner.
109
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:36,169
Me and my roommates
are having a party tomorrow night.
110
00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:38,171
Well, we're calling it an art jam.
111
00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:39,547
I was pushing for shindig,
112
00:05:39,630 --> 00:05:41,591
but Brendan always gets his way.
113
00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:43,843
You should come.
114
00:05:43,926 --> 00:05:45,428
I don't go to parties.
115
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:48,139
Well, in case you change your mind.
116
00:05:48,222 --> 00:05:50,183
I won't. Good starfish, though.
117
00:05:51,559 --> 00:05:54,645
I had a dream the other night
that I drowned in a lake.
118
00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:58,900
I didn't die, but the ice froze over,
119
00:05:58,983 --> 00:06:01,235
and I was trapped,
120
00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,738
thrashing around under the water
121
00:06:03,821 --> 00:06:07,617
and I could see everyone above me
on the surface,
122
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:11,454
and they were all doing great
without me and I'm...
123
00:06:13,247 --> 00:06:16,084
Well, I think ever since
I almost killed Cindy,
124
00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:18,086
that I've been drowning.
125
00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:24,258
You should probably tell them
Cindy's a plant.
126
00:06:25,676 --> 00:06:27,095
I thought that was obvious.
127
00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:28,858
So that went pretty well, don't you think?
128
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,765
Yeah, definitely.
129
00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:32,608
I'm starving.
You wanna get something to eat?
130
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:34,936
I don't think so.
131
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:40,900
- Is everything okay?
- Elsa stopped by my place.
132
00:06:40,983 --> 00:06:41,984
What?
133
00:06:42,276 --> 00:06:45,071
She said it was
to drop off my jacket, but...
134
00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:46,613
I don't know.
135
00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,200
Is she okay with our friendship?
136
00:06:49,283 --> 00:06:52,412
Trust me, if Elsa has a problem
with something, she'll let me know.
137
00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:55,665
Yeah, I did get that impression.
138
00:06:56,624 --> 00:07:00,211
Okay. There's this new Thai place on Maple
I've been wanting to check out.
139
00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:01,334
You wanna follow me there?
140
00:07:01,379 --> 00:07:03,214
Yeah. Yeah.
141
00:07:03,297 --> 00:07:04,632
I'll see you in a little bit.
142
00:07:04,715 --> 00:07:05,800
I'll see you there.
143
00:07:11,139 --> 00:07:13,015
Look at this face, look at it.
144
00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:16,018
Is it not lovable? Do you not wanna
spend time with his face?
145
00:07:17,645 --> 00:07:19,147
Only when it's attached to your body.
146
00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:20,356
Damn, right!
147
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,567
So why can't the peeps
in my nursing school see that?
148
00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:24,444
You'd think with nine chicks
to every dude,
149
00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:27,321
I'd be swimming in a sea
of potential Valentines.
150
00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:30,158
But instead, I get left out of everything.
151
00:07:30,241 --> 00:07:33,911
Last week a group from my fundamentals
of nursing class went and got mani-pedis.
152
00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:35,121
Did they invite the Z-man?
153
00:07:35,621 --> 00:07:37,331
- I have no idea.
- They did not.
154
00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:39,834
And you know how much Papa loves
a good callus removal.
155
00:07:39,917 --> 00:07:44,505
Oh, and on Sunday, my study group
went to see Miley Cyrus in concert.
156
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,966
The whole planet knows
how I feel about Miley.
157
00:07:47,049 --> 00:07:49,260
"Wrecking Ball" is the saddest song
ever written.
158
00:07:49,343 --> 00:07:52,680
Yet no invite for Z. It's a disgrace.
159
00:07:52,763 --> 00:07:55,183
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
160
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:58,853
my classmates can be annoying, too,
like the pencil thief.
161
00:07:58,936 --> 00:08:01,689
Well, that's not her real name, it's Abby.
162
00:08:01,772 --> 00:08:03,065
She wears light blue shoes.
163
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:04,692
Oh, I hate her already.
164
00:08:04,775 --> 00:08:06,736
So, what did this Abby do to ya?
165
00:08:07,695 --> 00:08:10,990
She invited me to a party or...
166
00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:13,034
well, an art jam.
167
00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:14,535
We must go.
168
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:15,661
What?
169
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:18,664
Dude, I love jam and jams.
170
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:21,959
I don't know,
I've never been to a real party,
171
00:08:22,043 --> 00:08:24,128
and the last time I almost went to one,
172
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:26,797
Arlo stole my money and pushed me down.
173
00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:30,551
And he's been receiving a small amount of
feces in the mail every month ever since.
174
00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:31,635
What?
175
00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:33,179
The less you know the better.
176
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:37,725
Anyway, Sammy,
here is the secret about parties:
177
00:08:37,808 --> 00:08:41,771
each one has the power
to change your whole life.
178
00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:45,358
Now, it may not happen,
but this could be the one.
179
00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:48,945
No.
180
00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:51,197
Okay, look...
181
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:56,118
I didn't wanna say this,
but I kind of need this right now.
182
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,996
My super smooth social skills
have not really been working
183
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:01,541
with these ladies nurses and, well...
184
00:09:02,124 --> 00:09:03,793
Brown Sugar's feeling adrift.
185
00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:08,548
Would it help if I whimpered?
186
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:10,091
Definitely not.
187
00:09:10,174 --> 00:09:13,427
Well, think of it like an expedition.
Like your boyfriend, Shacklebutt.
188
00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:14,679
Shackleton.
189
00:09:14,762 --> 00:09:15,846
Yeah, that's the stuff.
190
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:17,306
Come on, what do you say?
191
00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,641
Do it for the Big Dog?
192
00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:22,979
- Okay, fine.
- Yes!
193
00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:26,774
But if the music's too loud
or the snacks are mesquite-y, I'm leaving.
194
00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:28,734
Deal, a thousand times deal.
195
00:09:29,193 --> 00:09:30,111
Hey, quick question.
196
00:09:30,194 --> 00:09:32,989
Do you think they're gonna need
any nude models for this art deal-y?
197
00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:35,700
'Cause I just bought these slick
new tear-away track pants.
198
00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:39,287
I'll bring 'em just in case.
199
00:09:48,879 --> 00:09:50,214
What's going on?
200
00:09:50,298 --> 00:09:53,217
Oh, there's a sweet, young family
201
00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,970
in my autism group
and they're going through some hard times,
202
00:09:56,053 --> 00:10:01,517
and I've been feeling
like I needed a little purpose lately.
203
00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:03,853
So I decided to organize a clothing drive.
204
00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:05,688
Oh, that's nice.
205
00:10:08,899 --> 00:10:11,736
Did you go by Megan's house the other day?
206
00:10:11,819 --> 00:10:13,029
Yep.
207
00:10:13,112 --> 00:10:13,946
Why?
208
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:16,365
Well, she left her jacket here,
209
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:19,744
and then when you brought those two beers
of yours into our kitchen,
210
00:10:19,827 --> 00:10:21,704
I just wanted
to rip the skin off her face.
211
00:10:21,787 --> 00:10:25,833
So then went to her house, but then
I realized she's just a mom like me.
212
00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:28,502
What's between us is just that:
213
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:31,296
between us.
214
00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:35,383
Okay.
215
00:10:36,552 --> 00:10:39,180
So, do you have any clothes
you wanna donate?
216
00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:44,560
Yeah, I have some old pants
and some stuff I'll get.
217
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:45,728
That'd be great.
218
00:10:50,524 --> 00:10:53,361
This is so fun.
It's just like Thelma and Louise
219
00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:55,237
and Louise's brother.
220
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,031
Let's drive off a cliff!
221
00:10:57,114 --> 00:10:59,408
Just kidding. Duds for my buds?
222
00:11:00,117 --> 00:11:01,117
Sure, Dud me.
223
00:11:01,535 --> 00:11:03,829
How are you so peppy right now?
224
00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:04,997
We're driving into hell.
225
00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:06,999
It's not hell. It's New Hampshire.
226
00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:09,835
I know Dad can be a bit of a bad apple,
227
00:11:09,919 --> 00:11:12,380
but my Achilles' heel
is my big giant heart.
228
00:11:12,963 --> 00:11:14,090
I love that about you.
229
00:11:14,757 --> 00:11:16,175
I love everything about you.
230
00:11:16,842 --> 00:11:18,803
All right.
231
00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:22,139
- Hmm. That was encouraging.
- Oh, don't worry.
232
00:11:22,223 --> 00:11:24,350
It's just my car's way of saying hello.
233
00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:27,269
You only have to worry
when she doesn't do that.
234
00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,647
Hey, do you think Dewey
still likes tummy rubs?
235
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:31,482
I'm gonna find out!
236
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:35,403
Well, I can't believe
I'm saying this, but...
237
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:38,715
you should listen to the Big Dog
and be like Ernest Shacklebutt.
238
00:11:38,781 --> 00:11:40,616
- Shackleton.
- Oh, who cares?
239
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,785
I'm just excited
that you're going to a party.
240
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:44,995
Just be careful if you bring snacks.
241
00:11:45,079 --> 00:11:46,330
Why?
242
00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:49,014
Well, I didn't wanna say anything
'cause I didn't wanna scare you.
243
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:50,751
But my roommate Meredith,
244
00:11:51,168 --> 00:11:53,713
she's become sort of a cautionary tale
on campus.
245
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:54,672
Okay.
246
00:11:54,755 --> 00:11:56,382
At first everything was totally fine.
247
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:58,509
But then she got really homesick.
248
00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:02,263
She stopped showering
and started sleeping all the time.
249
00:12:03,013 --> 00:12:05,433
Then me and my friends
convinced her to go to a party.
250
00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:08,277
She thought it would be a good idea
to bring a nice block of Manchego.
251
00:12:08,352 --> 00:12:11,647
But when we got there, they didn't have
a knife, they didn't have any crackers.
252
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:15,025
So after Meredith had two Aperol spritzes,
253
00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,819
she needed something in her belly.
254
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:18,904
When they finally found her,
255
00:12:19,363 --> 00:12:23,242
she was crouched in a corner nibbling on
the block of cheese like a little mouse.
256
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:26,036
And ever since she's been known
as the dorm rat.
257
00:12:28,122 --> 00:12:30,416
Oh, that's a funny nickname.
258
00:12:30,499 --> 00:12:32,126
No, it's dumb.
259
00:12:32,209 --> 00:12:33,627
It's dumb, and it's hurtful.
260
00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:37,214
Because now, Meredith spends every night
alone in the common area
261
00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:40,050
just staring off into space
and eating her microwaved burrito.
262
00:12:41,552 --> 00:12:42,553
The point is,
263
00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:46,140
be social, make friends,
it's so important.
264
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:47,766
Okay.
265
00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:51,729
I'm only really going because
the lady nurses are mean to Zahid.
266
00:12:51,812 --> 00:12:54,652
He's probably trying to look down
their loose scrub shirts all the time.
267
00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:02,239
- Ah, hey there, Bethy.
- Daddy!
268
00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:04,282
Hi.
269
00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:05,743
I made positivity brownies.
270
00:13:05,826 --> 00:13:07,787
I thought a good thought with every stir.
271
00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:11,415
Hmm. Look at you.
272
00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:14,752
I can't believe my boy is 19.
273
00:13:14,835 --> 00:13:15,711
How'd that happen?
274
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,797
It didn't. I'm 18.
275
00:13:18,964 --> 00:13:20,841
Well, you look good.
276
00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,346
- This is Casey.
- Hi.
277
00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:28,599
Hi. Beth's told me me a lot about you.
You guys hungry?
278
00:13:28,682 --> 00:13:31,268
- Josie made ham sandwiches.
- Oh, okay.
279
00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:36,982
God, he doesn't even know my age.
280
00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:38,651
Hey, remember this.
281
00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:43,447
Casey, come meet Josie.
282
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:44,573
She's my foxy lady.
283
00:13:44,698 --> 00:13:46,992
Don't get any ideas, Evan,
that's your stepmom.
284
00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:48,536
No!
285
00:13:49,370 --> 00:13:53,457
Evan, your dad is so proud of you.
286
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:56,502
We really wanted to come
to your high school certificate ceremony,
287
00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:59,922
but since we couldn't, I'm just gonna...
288
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:03,342
Happy graduation.
289
00:14:03,425 --> 00:14:05,135
Oh, wow.
290
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:06,637
Just like being in Hawaii, right?
291
00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:07,721
So neat.
292
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,139
Jos took a Photoshop class
293
00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:12,160
through the University of Phoenix.
That's where she learned to do all that.
294
00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:13,644
Thanks, Josie.
295
00:14:13,727 --> 00:14:16,480
- This is... this is... I love it.
- Mm-hmm.
296
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:19,066
Oh, no problem.
297
00:14:19,191 --> 00:14:20,901
Oh, here's another one.
298
00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:24,029
I just love this photo
of your dad so much.
299
00:14:24,113 --> 00:14:27,408
But your mom was in it,
so I just replaced her with a llama.
300
00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:30,452
It's like he's on safari.
301
00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:34,247
I took that.
302
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:35,833
So what's going on with you?
303
00:14:35,916 --> 00:14:37,626
You working, taking classes?
304
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:41,714
Uh...
Yeah, I'm working at Don's Pizza Shop.
305
00:14:42,339 --> 00:14:43,966
No community college or anything?
306
00:14:45,885 --> 00:14:49,680
Huh! Good for you. An honest day's pay
for an honest day's work.
307
00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:52,766
You're not pretending
to be someone you're not. You got grit.
308
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:55,060
He does have grit.
309
00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:02,067
I know it was hard
310
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,903
for you kids when I left,
311
00:15:03,986 --> 00:15:07,990
but in some ways it was the best
possible thing that could've happened.
312
00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:09,742
It made you who you are today.
313
00:15:10,326 --> 00:15:12,453
What? Dad, are you serious?
314
00:15:12,536 --> 00:15:13,829
Evan, all I meant was...
315
00:15:14,455 --> 00:15:16,582
Just forget it.
316
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:18,959
So, where's Dewey?
317
00:15:19,043 --> 00:15:21,587
I made him seven flavored dog brownies.
318
00:15:21,670 --> 00:15:22,838
- Oh.
- Oh.
319
00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:26,467
- Um, well, Dewey lives outside now.
- Yeah.
320
00:15:26,550 --> 00:15:28,677
- Like all the time?
- He likes it that way.
321
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,429
He's got the whole backyard to himself.
322
00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:32,890
You wanna introduce me?
323
00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:35,643
Uh, yeah, yeah.
324
00:15:35,726 --> 00:15:36,727
Cool. We're gonna...
325
00:15:37,978 --> 00:15:39,647
- Hello.
- Hi.
326
00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:42,191
Carpooled with Kathy. Need wine now.
327
00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:43,274
Oh.
328
00:15:43,901 --> 00:15:44,901
Oh.
329
00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:46,946
Oh, no.
330
00:15:47,029 --> 00:15:48,364
- Everything all right?
- Hardly.
331
00:15:48,447 --> 00:15:52,660
As you know, I am very connected
to the spirit world,
332
00:15:52,743 --> 00:15:54,536
and I'm pretty sure...
333
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:56,622
Yep, definitely...
334
00:15:57,206 --> 00:16:00,125
YGAGG. You got a ghost, girl.
335
00:16:00,709 --> 00:16:01,543
What?
336
00:16:01,627 --> 00:16:05,547
I've never felt it before, but, I mean,
maybe it stowed away in one of the boxes.
337
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:08,884
Are there any pockets
of cool air in this room?
338
00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:12,638
Did anyone else just hear that?
339
00:16:13,180 --> 00:16:14,180
I got it.
340
00:16:16,558 --> 00:16:17,601
Izzie, hi.
341
00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:18,727
Hi, Mrs. Gardner.
342
00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:21,397
I know Casey isn't here,
but I was in the neighborhood
343
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:24,480
dropping my brother off at his friend's
house so I thought I should come by.
344
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,485
I accidentally took...
345
00:16:27,945 --> 00:16:29,738
Casey's math book yesterday.
346
00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:31,532
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
347
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:33,950
So...
348
00:16:34,368 --> 00:16:36,161
I should go home.
349
00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:40,374
You know, we could really use your help.
350
00:16:40,457 --> 00:16:42,960
We're doing this big clothing drive,
351
00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:45,629
and you have such a great sense of style.
352
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:46,630
Give us a hand?
353
00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:48,632
Okay. Yeah.
354
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:54,722
Question: was the previous occupant
of this house named Earl?
355
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:56,097
Or...
356
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:57,891
Pearl?
357
00:16:58,642 --> 00:16:59,642
Or...
358
00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:01,812
Worrell?
359
00:17:02,604 --> 00:17:05,357
Worrell? Is that even a name?
360
00:17:05,441 --> 00:17:08,235
Nobody here was ever named Worrell.
361
00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:09,944
Hmm.
362
00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:13,115
I think you're wrong.
363
00:17:15,909 --> 00:17:18,287
Last thing you wanna do is talk shop
at a party,
364
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:20,372
so no artsy-fartsy chitchat.
365
00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,249
If you need to leave,
tap me on my shoulder
366
00:17:22,332 --> 00:17:23,417
and out we're outie.
367
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:26,336
Unless I have a honey on the line,
in which case, hoof it, capiche?
368
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:28,047
- Can we go inside now?
- No.
369
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:32,926
When I walk in, I'm gonna pop this,
and you're gonna scream, "Party people!"
370
00:17:33,010 --> 00:17:34,720
- Absolutely not.
- Too late.
371
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,430
Party train's a'rollin'.
372
00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:47,066
♪ Go and keep it going, yeah ♪
373
00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:51,445
♪ Yeah ♪
374
00:18:02,706 --> 00:18:03,791
Whoa.
375
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:06,293
Hey, Sam. I'm glad you made it.
376
00:18:06,376 --> 00:18:08,045
Oh, hi, Abby.
377
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,339
I wasn't going to come,
378
00:18:10,422 --> 00:18:13,675
but my girlfriend Paige says
it's important to make new friends.
379
00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:16,095
Sorry, would you mind
turning down your backpack?
380
00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:17,387
Yes, very much.
381
00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:23,268
There's a ton of cool people here.
382
00:18:23,352 --> 00:18:25,192
- Have you met any of the potheads?
- Potheads?
383
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:28,065
I was talking about the ceramicists.
384
00:18:28,148 --> 00:18:31,193
- Ceramicists?
- They're total psychos. Here, come on.
385
00:18:32,402 --> 00:18:34,363
Okay, buddy, have fun.
386
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:35,614
Don't worry about me.
387
00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:37,282
I'll just be over here
388
00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:40,536
not listening to DJ Pattycakes,
except in my head.
389
00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:43,205
You can't stop this beat.
390
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:45,749
'Sup?
391
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:49,336
Good boy.
392
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:50,917
Come here!
393
00:18:51,922 --> 00:18:54,174
I'm sorry for dragging you into this.
394
00:18:54,258 --> 00:18:57,886
We shouldn't have come here. It's just
the same old shit with my dad every time.
395
00:18:59,763 --> 00:19:01,098
Yeah.
396
00:19:02,015 --> 00:19:04,059
But then we wouldn't get
to say goodbye to Dewey.
397
00:19:06,687 --> 00:19:09,022
So what's wrong
with Dewey, anyway?
398
00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:13,735
Oh! Yes, Dewey!
399
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:16,321
I mean, everyone dies sometime.
400
00:19:16,446 --> 00:19:18,490
You said Dewey could go any day.
401
00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,242
That is technically true.
402
00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:23,287
Last week I nearly choked to death
on a string cheese.
403
00:19:23,370 --> 00:19:25,247
- Life is so precious.
- So...
404
00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:29,751
There's was never really anything wrong
with Dewey, was there?
405
00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:35,340
All right, let's go.
406
00:19:35,757 --> 00:19:38,552
Aw, come on, can't a dad
just wanna see his kids?
407
00:19:38,635 --> 00:19:40,053
Yeah, most dad's could, not you!
408
00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:43,098
- Okay.
- Fine. There is one thing.
409
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:46,310
I need your signature on some papers.
410
00:19:47,102 --> 00:19:47,936
For what?
411
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:51,565
When you were little, your grandmother
started a college savings account for you.
412
00:19:51,648 --> 00:19:53,609
I just figured
since you're not using it...
413
00:19:57,487 --> 00:20:00,532
So, okay, let me get this straight.
414
00:20:01,074 --> 00:20:03,702
You lured us here with a fake dying dog
415
00:20:03,785 --> 00:20:06,205
so you could get my college money
from Grandma?
416
00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:08,081
When you say it like that, it sounds bad.
417
00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:10,417
- It is bad.
- Dad, do you have any milk to go
418
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:11,585
with these brownies?
419
00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:13,003
Okay, let loose.
420
00:20:13,086 --> 00:20:14,963
No, let's just go. Look at him.
421
00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:17,007
It's not even worth it.
422
00:20:17,090 --> 00:20:18,175
Yeah, it is.
423
00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:20,969
You know what, Duane?
424
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:22,888
You are an asshole.
425
00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,322
It is shocking you have kids this great.
426
00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:29,061
And if Evan doesn't wanna go to college,
that is his decision.
427
00:20:29,144 --> 00:20:29,978
That's not yours,
428
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:31,563
it's not mine, it's his.
429
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:34,441
You lost the right to say shit
the moment you walked out the door
430
00:20:34,524 --> 00:20:36,944
and didn't come back or call for,
what, 18 months?
431
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:41,406
Eighteen months?
432
00:20:43,450 --> 00:20:44,493
You jerk.
433
00:20:46,703 --> 00:20:48,080
Thank you for the hospitality.
434
00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:49,957
You seem sweet.
435
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:54,628
Oh, my God.
436
00:20:55,671 --> 00:20:58,382
I am so sorry.
I can't believe I yelled at your dad.
437
00:20:58,465 --> 00:21:00,801
I was the one who was supposed
to be keeping you calm.
438
00:21:04,012 --> 00:21:05,222
You are amazing.
439
00:21:05,305 --> 00:21:07,905
That's the first time I haven't yelled
at my dad, like, ten years.
440
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:10,811
I love you so much.
441
00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:13,021
What's taking Beth so long?
442
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:16,650
I don't know, but Josie's looking at us.
I really wanna get the hell out of here.
443
00:21:17,901 --> 00:21:19,987
Casey, I feel so empowered!
444
00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:23,323
I told my dad to eat sugar
and then I dognapped Dewey!
445
00:21:23,407 --> 00:21:25,075
- Oh, my God!
- Duane!
446
00:21:25,158 --> 00:21:26,410
Now drive, Evan, drive!
447
00:21:40,007 --> 00:21:41,383
Time. Pencils down.
448
00:21:44,845 --> 00:21:46,847
Dude, what? You're a machine.
449
00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:48,515
Thank you.
450
00:21:48,598 --> 00:21:51,226
I like your drawing, too,
especially your duck's fedora.
451
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:53,270
She's going to the royal wedding.
452
00:21:54,313 --> 00:21:56,481
Hey, how do you get your webbed feet
to look like that?
453
00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:58,900
It's all in the shading technique.
454
00:21:58,984 --> 00:21:59,985
Can you show me?
455
00:22:00,068 --> 00:22:02,237
I was already going to
whether you asked or not.
456
00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:04,239
Do you have your blending stumps?
457
00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:06,074
Five millimeter or ten?
458
00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:08,076
Better keep them both handy.
459
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,787
Yo ho ho, ducks and hats, huh?
460
00:22:10,871 --> 00:22:14,249
I've ducked a few hats in my day,
you know what I mean, huh?
461
00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:18,128
Ugh... okay.
462
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:20,172
Well, looks like the party
sorta died down...
463
00:22:20,630 --> 00:22:23,050
before we got here.
464
00:22:23,717 --> 00:22:25,510
Okay, what do you say, Sam?
Call it a night?
465
00:22:26,553 --> 00:22:28,597
Oh, okay.
466
00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:30,015
I guess we could go.
467
00:22:30,098 --> 00:22:33,477
Okay. And your next prompt is penguins.
468
00:22:35,103 --> 00:22:36,313
Yes!
469
00:22:40,942 --> 00:22:42,194
You can't smoke that in here.
470
00:22:42,277 --> 00:22:44,863
Because that would be too fun?
471
00:22:44,946 --> 00:22:46,865
No, because Travis has asthma.
472
00:22:52,329 --> 00:22:53,163
Zahid, wait.
473
00:22:53,246 --> 00:22:54,081
Yeah?
474
00:22:54,164 --> 00:22:56,625
If you're going outside anyway,
can you take the recycling?
475
00:22:56,708 --> 00:22:58,377
It's in a can by the back door. Thanks.
476
00:22:59,711 --> 00:23:01,630
And go.
477
00:23:13,100 --> 00:23:17,062
♪ All I wanted was to break your walls ♪
478
00:23:17,145 --> 00:23:21,274
♪ All you ever did was wreck me ♪
479
00:23:21,358 --> 00:23:24,403
♪ I came in like a wrecking ball... ♪
480
00:23:26,780 --> 00:23:28,323
Miley Cyrus, huh?
481
00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:29,407
You know it.
482
00:23:31,201 --> 00:23:34,371
She's one of the six people on this planet
who actually tells the truth.
483
00:23:34,454 --> 00:23:36,498
I've never counted, but I believe you.
484
00:23:36,581 --> 00:23:38,667
You shouldn't. I'm not one of the six.
485
00:23:38,750 --> 00:23:40,710
I'm Zahid.
486
00:23:41,294 --> 00:23:42,294
Gretchen.
487
00:23:43,296 --> 00:23:47,050
So, Gretchen, what is an obviously
cultured woman such as yourself
488
00:23:47,134 --> 00:23:48,718
doing hanging out by a dumpster?
489
00:23:49,970 --> 00:23:52,597
I did that thing
where that lady says to toss out anything
490
00:23:52,681 --> 00:23:54,558
that doesn't spark joy.
491
00:23:54,641 --> 00:23:55,559
Ah.
492
00:23:55,642 --> 00:23:57,082
I'm not usually that impressionable,
493
00:23:57,144 --> 00:24:00,230
but I was like,
she's right, who needs tons of stuff?
494
00:24:01,064 --> 00:24:04,359
But then when my apartment was empty,
I realized... I do.
495
00:24:04,443 --> 00:24:06,486
So here I am.
496
00:24:07,863 --> 00:24:09,990
Hey. You look...
497
00:24:10,866 --> 00:24:11,866
limber.
498
00:24:14,870 --> 00:24:16,872
Wanna swan dive on in there
499
00:24:16,955 --> 00:24:19,166
and tell me if you can see
a cool mist humidifier?
500
00:24:20,333 --> 00:24:22,878
Uh... no, but I will look for you.
501
00:24:26,631 --> 00:24:28,175
Sorry, I don't see it.
502
00:24:28,258 --> 00:24:29,258
Damn.
503
00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:34,097
I kind of wanna cry right now,
504
00:24:34,181 --> 00:24:37,767
but maybe it's because this
is the saddest song in the universe.
505
00:24:41,563 --> 00:24:45,567
Gretchen, I'd like to go absolutely
anywhere with you right now
506
00:24:45,650 --> 00:24:48,945
to discuss absolutely anything.
You down with that?
507
00:24:51,156 --> 00:24:52,157
Okay.
508
00:24:54,451 --> 00:24:55,451
Hmm?
509
00:24:56,161 --> 00:24:59,706
♪ Yeah, you, you wreck me ♪
510
00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:04,085
♪ Yeah, you, you wreck me ♪
511
00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:05,503
Hey.
512
00:25:06,421 --> 00:25:08,632
- So I've been doing some thinking...
- Don't lie.
513
00:25:11,301 --> 00:25:12,301
Sorry.
514
00:25:12,969 --> 00:25:15,013
It's my shit-giving reflex,
it's out of control.
515
00:25:16,097 --> 00:25:17,682
I just... I think...
516
00:25:18,475 --> 00:25:20,810
that the reason why I've had...
517
00:25:21,144 --> 00:25:23,730
so much trouble getting my head
around the whole...
518
00:25:24,356 --> 00:25:26,608
California thing is just that I...
519
00:25:31,112 --> 00:25:33,490
I just... I don't wanna be like my dad.
520
00:25:34,741 --> 00:25:37,202
What are you talking about?
Dude, you could never.
521
00:25:37,285 --> 00:25:40,539
No, I know it doesn't make any sense.
522
00:25:40,622 --> 00:25:41,622
I just...
523
00:25:42,916 --> 00:25:45,085
I think that if I ever left...
524
00:25:46,962 --> 00:25:50,549
I'd always feel like
I was abandoning my mom or Beth.
525
00:25:52,801 --> 00:25:54,010
I just can't do that.
526
00:25:55,679 --> 00:25:56,679
You're right.
527
00:25:57,222 --> 00:25:58,765
That doesn't make any sense.
528
00:26:00,392 --> 00:26:02,644
Oh!
529
00:26:03,478 --> 00:26:05,897
I think that's your car's way
of saying goodbye.
530
00:26:10,819 --> 00:26:14,864
- I made that.
- It's ridiculously adorable.
531
00:26:14,948 --> 00:26:18,493
Hmm. Casey refused to wear it, of course.
532
00:26:18,577 --> 00:26:22,622
But she did put it on her stuffed zebra
for a while so I consider that a win.
533
00:26:23,331 --> 00:26:27,419
Okay, nope,
you are not giving this one away.
534
00:26:33,258 --> 00:26:35,594
Oh, I remember that day.
535
00:26:37,345 --> 00:26:40,599
Casey got in trouble
at school for acting out.
536
00:26:41,725 --> 00:26:44,311
She was so upset about it.
537
00:26:44,394 --> 00:26:46,771
So the next day I picked her up early
from school
538
00:26:46,855 --> 00:26:49,566
and I took her to Sal E. Sour Cream,
539
00:26:50,317 --> 00:26:53,612
and we had lunch together,
and it was special
540
00:26:53,695 --> 00:26:57,157
because we could never go there
as a family because Sam hated it,
541
00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:00,201
you know, because of the lights
and the noise and...
542
00:27:00,869 --> 00:27:03,330
Oh, she was so happy.
543
00:27:08,752 --> 00:27:11,046
Oh, honey, honey, I'm sorry.
544
00:27:11,755 --> 00:27:14,758
No, no, no, it's okay.
545
00:27:17,177 --> 00:27:19,846
I don't know why I'm crying,
it's so stupid.
546
00:27:19,929 --> 00:27:22,182
No, it's not stupid.
547
00:27:26,061 --> 00:27:27,228
I don't know, I...
548
00:27:29,856 --> 00:27:32,275
I guess I just wish
I had a childhood like that.
549
00:27:34,235 --> 00:27:35,235
Me too.
550
00:27:39,199 --> 00:27:40,909
Growing up, well...
551
00:27:41,868 --> 00:27:43,453
it wasn't a great environment.
552
00:27:46,331 --> 00:27:49,167
I think that's why
I always tried so hard...
553
00:27:50,293 --> 00:27:53,088
to make it different
for Sam and Casey, you know,
554
00:27:53,171 --> 00:27:54,756
to give them, like,
555
00:27:54,839 --> 00:27:56,758
the perfect, perfect childhood.
556
00:27:58,426 --> 00:28:01,680
I probably went overboard,
I mean, I probably still do.
557
00:28:04,641 --> 00:28:08,937
I'm gonna tell you something that I wish
someone had told me.
558
00:28:10,438 --> 00:28:12,107
Our door is always open.
559
00:28:13,233 --> 00:28:17,195
No matter what you need, anything at all,
even if it's a place to stay.
560
00:28:19,155 --> 00:28:20,156
Thanks.
561
00:28:21,991 --> 00:28:26,246
But I'm really scared of ghosts.
562
00:28:26,329 --> 00:28:28,123
So I don't think so.
563
00:28:36,423 --> 00:28:39,175
Hey, thanks for picking us up.
It's a really long drive.
564
00:28:39,259 --> 00:28:41,739
Well, I'm not gonna just leave you guys
on the side of the road
565
00:28:41,803 --> 00:28:43,471
with all the stuff I see is an EMT.
566
00:28:44,097 --> 00:28:45,390
It's really cool.
567
00:28:46,349 --> 00:28:48,393
You, like, rescue people.
568
00:28:49,185 --> 00:28:51,312
- You know, you save lives.
- Yeah.
569
00:28:54,983 --> 00:28:57,110
Hey, do you to go to college to be an EMT?
570
00:28:57,193 --> 00:28:59,279
No. I know guys that didn't.
571
00:29:00,071 --> 00:29:02,907
But you have time to figure that out.
You're, what, 18, right?
572
00:29:04,409 --> 00:29:06,911
Yeah. I am.
573
00:29:07,787 --> 00:29:10,206
Yeah, you plenty of time
to figure it all out.
574
00:29:21,718 --> 00:29:24,846
Oh, good,
are you finally moving out?
575
00:29:24,929 --> 00:29:27,307
Ha ha. Good to see you, too.
576
00:29:28,308 --> 00:29:30,393
Hey, how was it? How are the kids?
577
00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:33,229
They're fine? Did you know
they went up there to kidnap a dog?
578
00:29:33,980 --> 00:29:34,856
A dog?
579
00:29:34,939 --> 00:29:38,818
Anyway, I'm gonna hit the back seat
of your car with a Dustbuster tomorrow
580
00:29:38,902 --> 00:29:40,528
to get out the rest of that fur.
581
00:29:41,112 --> 00:29:42,112
Thank you.
582
00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:46,451
Looks like you got a lot done.
You need any help carrying anything?
583
00:29:46,534 --> 00:29:47,827
Nah, I'm almost finished.
584
00:29:47,911 --> 00:29:49,579
I can do the rest in the morning.
585
00:29:49,829 --> 00:29:53,124
Oh, and Kathy thinks we have a ghost.
586
00:29:53,208 --> 00:29:54,834
Oh, she does?
587
00:29:55,418 --> 00:29:57,337
Well, I just hope
it's not another teenager.
588
00:30:03,259 --> 00:30:04,677
Hey, Sam, have you seen Zahid?
589
00:30:04,761 --> 00:30:07,514
He was supposed to be here an hour ago.
I'm starting to get worried.
590
00:30:07,597 --> 00:30:08,597
It's not like him.
591
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:11,601
He has many flaws,
but he's usually very punctual.
592
00:30:11,684 --> 00:30:14,687
No, but he did send me a text last night.
593
00:30:16,648 --> 00:30:18,942
Eggplant, water droplet, dragon.
594
00:30:19,025 --> 00:30:22,695
Zahid met a dragon,
or he ate a wet eggplant,
595
00:30:22,779 --> 00:30:25,240
or he went swimming with a dragon?
596
00:30:25,323 --> 00:30:26,449
Who the heck's the dragon?
597
00:30:27,534 --> 00:30:30,078
Clearly I'm the dragon, bro.
598
00:30:30,161 --> 00:30:32,539
Sorry, I'm late, buddy,
won't happen again.
599
00:30:32,622 --> 00:30:34,332
Great haircut, obviously.
600
00:30:34,415 --> 00:30:35,542
Well, catch you at lunch.
601
00:30:37,919 --> 00:30:40,630
Dude, I just had a 65-hour date
602
00:30:40,713 --> 00:30:44,008
with the most amazing-ass girl I met
at that lame-ass party you dragged me to.
603
00:30:44,092 --> 00:30:46,511
Her name is Gretchen.
She can touch her tongue to her nose.
604
00:30:46,594 --> 00:30:48,096
She loves jerk goat,
605
00:30:48,179 --> 00:30:51,391
and we're buying a waterbed together!
Squeezes.
606
00:30:54,227 --> 00:30:56,020
You thought the party was lame-ass?
607
00:30:56,104 --> 00:30:58,523
Super duper lame-ass,
the lamest of all asses.
608
00:30:58,606 --> 00:31:02,110
But it just goes to show you, every party
has the power to change your whole life.
609
00:31:02,193 --> 00:31:06,656
Kids these days, meeting people
on Bumble and Tinder and Squirt...
610
00:31:07,115 --> 00:31:09,784
Not me. I met my love by a dumpster.
611
00:31:10,577 --> 00:31:12,370
- Your love?
- That's right, Sammy.
612
00:31:12,453 --> 00:31:13,705
I'm in love!
613
00:31:15,707 --> 00:31:18,585
I've been so busy falling in love,
I haven't showered in a few days.
614
00:31:18,668 --> 00:31:22,380
Can you cover me while I go splash some
water on my pits and nuts? Okay, thanks.
615
00:31:26,759 --> 00:31:28,803
Wait, that's what an eggplant means?
616
00:31:28,887 --> 00:31:31,180
Oh, my God, I had no idea.
617
00:31:31,723 --> 00:31:35,018
I've used that one a lot.
618
00:31:35,602 --> 00:31:38,563
Well, anyway,
I'm proud of you, Sam Gardner.
619
00:31:39,063 --> 00:31:41,399
You went to a college party,
and you made friends.
620
00:31:41,482 --> 00:31:44,652
It's like I always say,
we need as many friends as we can get.
621
00:31:44,736 --> 00:31:47,238
I'm still not sure if that's true,
622
00:31:47,322 --> 00:31:49,365
but I'm glad I went to the party.
623
00:31:50,283 --> 00:31:54,037
I guess I'm not like your microwaved
burrito friend after all.
624
00:31:54,662 --> 00:31:56,331
A dorm rat has no friends.
625
00:31:57,290 --> 00:31:59,459
Well, I should probably get going.
626
00:31:59,542 --> 00:32:01,586
I'm meeting some peeps off campus
for dinner.
627
00:32:01,669 --> 00:32:04,005
Lucky for me, my friend Brie has a car.
628
00:32:04,088 --> 00:32:05,089
It's a VW Beetle.
629
00:32:05,173 --> 00:32:07,842
She even has those fake eyelashes
on the headlights and everything.
630
00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:09,302
It's hilarious.
631
00:32:09,385 --> 00:32:10,386
Okay, bye, Paige.
632
00:32:13,556 --> 00:32:14,556
Bye, Sam.
633
00:32:24,442 --> 00:32:28,196
♪ We clawed
We chained our hearts in vain ♪
634
00:32:28,279 --> 00:32:31,908
♪ We jumped never asking why ♪
635
00:32:32,367 --> 00:32:35,328
♪ We kissed, I fell under your spell... ♪
636
00:32:41,542 --> 00:32:43,002
Look who it is.
637
00:32:43,086 --> 00:32:44,837
Hey, what's up, dorm rat?
638
00:32:45,505 --> 00:32:47,799
Don't forget to put cheese
on that burrito.
639
00:32:56,724 --> 00:33:01,104
♪ I came in like a wrecking ball ♪
640
00:33:01,437 --> 00:33:04,941
♪ I never hit so hard in love ♪
641
00:33:05,024 --> 00:33:08,945
♪ All I wanted was to break your walls ♪
642
00:33:09,028 --> 00:33:13,449
♪ All you ever did was wreck me ♪
643
00:33:13,533 --> 00:33:16,911
♪ I came in like a wrecking ball ♪
644
00:33:17,328 --> 00:33:21,207
♪ Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung ♪
645
00:33:21,290 --> 00:33:25,044
♪ Left me crashing in a blazing fall ♪
646
00:33:25,128 --> 00:33:30,008
♪ All you ever did was wreck me ♪
647
00:33:30,216 --> 00:33:33,803
♪ Yeah, you, you wreck me ♪
648
00:33:34,053 --> 00:33:38,224
♪ Yeah, you, you wreck me ♪