1 00:00:04,708 --> 00:00:06,768 They're in that same spot again. 2 00:00:08,845 --> 00:00:11,041 They've definitely found something. 3 00:00:13,083 --> 00:00:14,642 There's something going on. 4 00:00:15,785 --> 00:00:17,515 Is it ready? 5 00:00:17,554 --> 00:00:19,580 Light's on. 6 00:00:19,622 --> 00:00:22,217 All right. Give me the control. 7 00:00:25,528 --> 00:00:28,623 All right. Gently does it. 8 00:00:28,665 --> 00:00:32,761 I'm lifting off in a three, two, one. 9 00:00:36,473 --> 00:00:38,305 Up she goes. 10 00:00:44,748 --> 00:00:48,082 How do you make it steady? Stop it going up. 11 00:00:48,118 --> 00:00:50,280 Just let go of the joystick. 12 00:00:52,322 --> 00:00:54,120 Still going up? 13 00:00:54,157 --> 00:00:56,786 Yep. Just try flicking it down. 14 00:00:59,429 --> 00:01:01,125 Still going up, is it? 15 00:01:01,164 --> 00:01:04,134 Yep. Yeah, that's really high now. 16 00:01:04,167 --> 00:01:05,601 How high is it supposed to go? 17 00:01:05,635 --> 00:01:08,298 Well, how am I supposed to know? It's not responding. 18 00:01:08,338 --> 00:01:10,102 How do you make it come down? 19 00:01:10,140 --> 00:01:12,109 Here, let me see. 20 00:01:13,476 --> 00:01:15,775 - Can you see it? - Only just. 21 00:01:17,847 --> 00:01:21,284 No. No, I'm losing it. It's gone. 22 00:01:21,317 --> 00:01:22,979 No. No, yeah, yeah, there! 23 00:01:23,019 --> 00:01:24,954 No. 24 00:01:26,055 --> 00:01:28,047 No, I can't see it. 25 00:01:31,828 --> 00:01:35,595 Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. 26 00:01:35,632 --> 00:01:38,625 So that's it, is it? It just keeps going until it's in orbit? 27 00:01:42,438 --> 00:01:44,168 How long do the batteries last? 28 00:01:44,207 --> 00:01:45,732 20 minutes. 29 00:01:48,211 --> 00:01:50,612 I thought you said you could fly these things? 30 00:01:50,647 --> 00:01:51,808 I never said that. 31 00:01:51,848 --> 00:01:53,612 Well, why did you keep letting it go up? 32 00:01:53,650 --> 00:01:56,017 I tried everything. It just wasn't responding. 33 00:01:56,052 --> 00:01:57,680 It just kept going up and up. 34 00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:59,814 You can tell that to the insurance company. 35 00:01:59,856 --> 00:02:00,915 Why me? 36 00:02:00,957 --> 00:02:04,758 Because, Paul, you're the one that said he could fly these. 37 00:02:04,794 --> 00:02:06,854 Whoa! 38 00:02:16,906 --> 00:02:21,970 ♪ Will you search the lonely earth for me? 39 00:02:22,011 --> 00:02:26,915 ♪ Climb through the briar and bramble? 40 00:02:26,950 --> 00:02:30,887 ♪ I'll be your treasure 41 00:02:32,288 --> 00:02:35,486 ♪ I'm waiting for you 42 00:02:36,926 --> 00:02:40,988 ♪ I'm waiting for you 43 00:02:45,034 --> 00:02:46,764 See QI this week? 44 00:02:46,803 --> 00:02:48,032 Yeah. 45 00:02:48,071 --> 00:02:52,406 Never thought I'd say this, but I think I prefer Toksvig to Fry. 46 00:02:52,442 --> 00:02:54,308 Controversial. 47 00:02:54,344 --> 00:02:56,108 Oh, don't you think she's better? 48 00:02:56,145 --> 00:02:58,910 I'm not prepared to stick my neck out that far, mate. 49 00:02:58,948 --> 00:03:01,349 She's certainly doing a good job. 50 00:03:01,384 --> 00:03:04,047 Big shoes to fill, literally. 51 00:03:05,288 --> 00:03:06,347 Why literally? 52 00:03:07,891 --> 00:03:09,917 Stephen Fry's got big feet. 53 00:03:09,959 --> 00:03:13,259 Yeah, but she doesn't literally have to wear his shoes. 54 00:03:13,296 --> 00:03:15,322 Well, actually, they've got a rule... 55 00:03:15,365 --> 00:03:17,425 Who's this? 56 00:03:17,467 --> 00:03:19,629 - All right? - Morning. 57 00:03:19,669 --> 00:03:22,468 Metal detectors, are you? 58 00:03:22,505 --> 00:03:24,064 You could say that. 59 00:03:24,107 --> 00:03:27,407 Are you one of them? One of the solar people. 60 00:03:27,443 --> 00:03:30,538 Tree clearance. Getting rid of nuisance trees. 61 00:03:30,580 --> 00:03:32,173 That's quite a slogan. 62 00:03:32,215 --> 00:03:34,514 Your life must be filled with joy. 63 00:03:34,550 --> 00:03:36,143 - Eh? - Nothing. 64 00:03:36,185 --> 00:03:38,120 Not getting rid of this one though. 65 00:03:38,154 --> 00:03:41,249 - This one's going, yeah. - What? Why? 66 00:03:41,291 --> 00:03:43,624 What nuisance is this one causing? 67 00:03:43,660 --> 00:03:44,787 Shadow. 68 00:03:47,597 --> 00:03:48,895 One small patch? 69 00:03:48,932 --> 00:03:53,097 Yeah, you see the sun, see, it travels through the sky 70 00:03:53,136 --> 00:03:56,402 and that patch covers half an acre in a day. 71 00:03:56,439 --> 00:04:00,467 That's a lot of sunlight all wasted on a tree. 72 00:04:00,510 --> 00:04:01,705 See ya. 73 00:04:04,781 --> 00:04:06,750 That's depressing. 74 00:04:06,783 --> 00:04:09,275 Shouldn't we do something about it? 75 00:04:10,353 --> 00:04:12,515 Like what? Save the tree? 76 00:04:12,555 --> 00:04:14,683 Well, shouldn't we? I mean... 77 00:04:14,724 --> 00:04:17,125 we don't want the tree to be cut down. 78 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:18,685 No. 79 00:04:18,728 --> 00:04:20,754 So we should probably try and save it. 80 00:04:21,931 --> 00:04:24,992 So how do you save a tree? 81 00:04:25,034 --> 00:04:28,368 Well, traditionally, you chain yourself to it, don't you? 82 00:04:28,404 --> 00:04:29,997 One of us chains ourself to the tree 83 00:04:30,039 --> 00:04:32,873 and the other one goes and gets the press. 84 00:04:32,909 --> 00:04:35,003 Yeah. 85 00:04:35,044 --> 00:04:36,979 I don't know. 86 00:04:37,013 --> 00:04:39,278 It's... a bit embarrassing. 87 00:04:39,315 --> 00:04:41,216 Huh. Yeah. 88 00:05:12,949 --> 00:05:14,383 Bat box. 89 00:05:16,185 --> 00:05:17,585 What's that? 90 00:05:17,620 --> 00:05:20,021 Bat box is what we need to save that tree. 91 00:05:20,056 --> 00:05:23,151 Whack a bat box up there, bats start roosting. 92 00:05:23,192 --> 00:05:25,161 Boom. They can't touch it. 93 00:05:25,194 --> 00:05:27,129 - Yeah? - Hmm. 94 00:05:27,163 --> 00:05:29,029 It's the same as Great Crested Newts. 95 00:05:29,065 --> 00:05:31,000 You can have a muddy puddle essentially 96 00:05:31,034 --> 00:05:33,367 but as soon as one of those slippery bastards rocks up, 97 00:05:33,403 --> 00:05:36,202 it becomes a Site of Special Scientific Interest. 98 00:05:36,239 --> 00:05:38,470 Scourge of the developer. 99 00:05:38,508 --> 00:05:42,445 All right, well, you should get onto that then. Build a bat box. 100 00:05:42,478 --> 00:05:45,175 Yeah. Maybe I will. 101 00:05:46,549 --> 00:05:47,847 Oh, I wish I had a shed. 102 00:05:49,352 --> 00:05:51,844 Oh, yeah. Sorry, mate. I forgot. 103 00:05:53,122 --> 00:05:54,613 What did you do with your tools? 104 00:05:54,657 --> 00:05:57,627 Well, they're in crates in the garage going rusty. 105 00:06:00,863 --> 00:06:04,459 You didn't wipe 'em with an oily rag before you put 'em away? 106 00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:08,232 Well, yeah, obviously. I was being dramatic. 107 00:06:08,271 --> 00:06:10,467 Oh. 108 00:06:10,506 --> 00:06:13,533 I see. 109 00:06:13,576 --> 00:06:15,135 What you got? 110 00:06:15,178 --> 00:06:17,010 Carpet stair rod holder. 111 00:06:17,046 --> 00:06:20,016 Yeah. I've had a couple of them. 112 00:06:20,049 --> 00:06:22,712 Must have been a flight of stairs here somewhere. 113 00:06:47,110 --> 00:06:49,773 Er... hello? 114 00:06:49,812 --> 00:06:51,178 Toni? 115 00:06:53,349 --> 00:06:54,749 Hi, Kate. What you doing here? 116 00:06:54,784 --> 00:06:58,050 - Which is the front door? - Come down this end. 117 00:07:02,859 --> 00:07:05,055 Oh, don't I need to say something? 118 00:07:05,094 --> 00:07:07,154 Like, to be invited on board. 119 00:07:07,196 --> 00:07:09,165 You're thinking of vampires. 120 00:07:10,433 --> 00:07:12,129 Oh. 121 00:07:12,168 --> 00:07:14,399 - Ooh! - Go on. 122 00:07:14,437 --> 00:07:16,167 Thanks. 123 00:07:20,843 --> 00:07:22,311 This place is amazing. 124 00:07:22,345 --> 00:07:24,439 Thanks. It was my grandparents'. 125 00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:27,040 No way. How long have you lived on it? 126 00:07:27,083 --> 00:07:28,745 About three years. 127 00:07:28,784 --> 00:07:30,377 And it makes my dad heave. 128 00:07:30,419 --> 00:07:32,285 He hasn't even got this far. 129 00:07:32,321 --> 00:07:34,847 He doesn't even like looking at it from dry land. 130 00:07:34,891 --> 00:07:37,588 You know he's only ever seen the sea once? 131 00:07:37,627 --> 00:07:38,856 He told me that. 132 00:07:38,895 --> 00:07:40,989 Don't expect beach holidays. 133 00:07:41,030 --> 00:07:44,660 I'm not expecting anything. 134 00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:48,159 I'm gonna move out of my dad's flat. Find my own place. 135 00:07:48,204 --> 00:07:50,264 Why? He likes you being there. 136 00:07:50,306 --> 00:07:53,105 Yeah, I know. That's why I've stayed so long. 137 00:07:53,142 --> 00:07:55,134 He's afraid I'm gonna disappear again, 138 00:07:55,178 --> 00:07:57,443 which is why I haven't told him yet. 139 00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:58,709 So why are you telling me? 140 00:07:58,748 --> 00:08:01,843 I just want you to know that I won't be around all the time. 141 00:08:01,884 --> 00:08:03,352 I won't be in your way. 142 00:08:03,386 --> 00:08:06,845 You've never been in my way. That's not fair, Kate. 143 00:08:06,889 --> 00:08:09,950 Don't do anything on my account because I don't even know 144 00:08:09,992 --> 00:08:11,961 if your dad and I are still seeing each other. 145 00:08:11,994 --> 00:08:13,792 Please don't break up with my dad. 146 00:08:13,829 --> 00:08:15,457 - He thinks the world of you. - Kate. 147 00:08:15,498 --> 00:08:19,196 He let Maggie stay because he's a kind and decent guy. 148 00:08:19,235 --> 00:08:20,601 Did he send you here? 149 00:08:20,636 --> 00:08:22,969 Yeah. He said, "Nip down and tell Toni 150 00:08:23,005 --> 00:08:24,769 that I'm a kind and decent guy." 151 00:08:24,807 --> 00:08:26,537 No, of course not. I just felt bad 152 00:08:26,576 --> 00:08:29,637 because I let her in the flat. I didn't know who she was. 153 00:08:29,679 --> 00:08:32,342 Look, Kate, I don't wanna discuss it with you. 154 00:08:32,381 --> 00:08:34,748 Your dad and I will either sort it out or we won't, 155 00:08:34,784 --> 00:08:38,186 but I don't need advice or character references, thanks. 156 00:08:38,221 --> 00:08:41,214 I know he's a decent guy. That's why I'm going out with him. 157 00:08:41,257 --> 00:08:43,590 - So you've not broken up? - Shut up, please! 158 00:08:43,626 --> 00:08:45,618 I don't wanna talk about it with you. 159 00:08:45,661 --> 00:08:48,961 I feel like I'm back at sixth form talking about boyfriends. 160 00:08:48,998 --> 00:08:50,296 I'm too old for this. 161 00:08:50,333 --> 00:08:53,861 All right. I'll back off. I've said my bit. 162 00:08:53,903 --> 00:08:55,997 I just worry about him, you know? 163 00:08:56,038 --> 00:08:57,597 I know. 164 00:08:59,609 --> 00:09:01,737 I love your ship. 165 00:09:03,312 --> 00:09:05,178 It's a boat really. 166 00:09:05,214 --> 00:09:07,513 I love it. I'll see ya. 167 00:09:40,082 --> 00:09:42,051 Steve, can I find a safe home for this? 168 00:09:42,084 --> 00:09:44,815 What's that, a porcupine? 169 00:09:44,854 --> 00:09:47,483 Porcupine? You serious? It's a hedgehog. 170 00:09:47,523 --> 00:09:49,754 Thought hedgehogs were flat. 171 00:09:49,792 --> 00:09:52,091 The squashed dead ones are flat. 172 00:09:52,128 --> 00:09:54,256 The live ones are spherical. 173 00:09:54,297 --> 00:09:55,822 All right, Richard Attenborough. 174 00:09:56,599 --> 00:09:57,828 It's David. 175 00:09:57,867 --> 00:10:01,099 Oh, I'm sorry. Been calling you Andy. 176 00:10:39,475 --> 00:10:41,239 Grab this, will you, mate? 177 00:10:41,277 --> 00:10:42,745 Sorry, mate. I'm not actually... 178 00:10:42,778 --> 00:10:44,940 Come on! It's killing me. 179 00:12:22,912 --> 00:12:25,746 - Hello. - Hey. 180 00:12:27,716 --> 00:12:29,241 What's in the crate? 181 00:12:32,922 --> 00:12:35,255 Please step away from the crate. 182 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:46,666 Kate came to see me. Did she tell you? 183 00:12:46,702 --> 00:12:49,433 To your place? What for? 184 00:12:49,472 --> 00:12:52,909 To tell me what a swell prince of a guy you are. 185 00:12:52,942 --> 00:12:55,138 Hmm. I'm not that great. 186 00:12:55,177 --> 00:12:57,203 That's what I said. 187 00:12:57,246 --> 00:12:59,442 - She come aboard? - Yep. 188 00:12:59,482 --> 00:13:01,144 - Did she puke? - Nope. 189 00:13:01,183 --> 00:13:03,880 - Turn a pallid yellow? - No. 190 00:13:03,919 --> 00:13:05,512 Not hereditary, then. 191 00:13:09,959 --> 00:13:12,190 The reason I let Maggie stay 192 00:13:12,228 --> 00:13:15,221 was cos I don't have any feelings for her any more. 193 00:13:15,264 --> 00:13:17,529 I could just treat her as a guest. 194 00:13:17,566 --> 00:13:21,560 But... with you, I'd want it to be just us. 195 00:13:22,905 --> 00:13:25,704 OK. That's quite sweet. 196 00:13:25,741 --> 00:13:29,473 Yeah? Shall I go on? 197 00:13:29,512 --> 00:13:31,344 See what happens. 198 00:13:35,017 --> 00:13:37,486 Well, that was it, really. 199 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:40,115 Kate's got her own room. She wouldn't disturb us. 200 00:13:40,155 --> 00:13:42,021 Well, that's not it, is it? 201 00:13:42,057 --> 00:13:45,027 I mean, the thing is, would we disturb her? 202 00:13:45,060 --> 00:13:47,325 Huh? 203 00:13:47,363 --> 00:13:49,491 - You know? - Not really. 204 00:13:49,532 --> 00:13:53,333 Well, it's... a question of acoustics. 205 00:13:53,369 --> 00:13:55,929 Acoustics? 206 00:13:55,971 --> 00:13:58,668 Oh, God, you know, soundproofing. 207 00:13:58,707 --> 00:14:02,576 The thought of... Kate hearing any goings on. 208 00:14:03,979 --> 00:14:06,244 Don't laugh. It's hard enough as it is. 209 00:14:06,282 --> 00:14:08,274 You know what I mean, it's awkward. 210 00:14:08,317 --> 00:14:10,183 So what are you thinking? Egg boxes? 211 00:14:10,219 --> 00:14:12,313 I was thinking egg boxes, 212 00:14:12,354 --> 00:14:14,550 cos there's a stack of 'em in the warehouse. 213 00:14:14,590 --> 00:14:16,582 Big sheets of 'em. 214 00:14:19,828 --> 00:14:21,797 I... I can't tell her to leave. 215 00:14:22,765 --> 00:14:24,199 I just can't do it. 216 00:14:27,002 --> 00:14:30,302 You know what? I think she might be ready to go, 217 00:14:30,339 --> 00:14:32,706 but she thinks you'll be upset. 218 00:14:32,741 --> 00:14:35,973 - What makes you think that? - She told me. 219 00:14:36,011 --> 00:14:40,005 She told me she was gonna start looking for a place of her own. 220 00:14:40,049 --> 00:14:42,280 Where? Here? 221 00:14:42,318 --> 00:14:43,718 Oh, close by. Yeah. 222 00:14:43,752 --> 00:14:46,745 Oh, well, that's... that's different. 223 00:14:46,789 --> 00:14:49,156 I mean, if... if she wants to. 224 00:14:49,191 --> 00:14:52,127 I just didn't want it to come from me but... 225 00:14:54,697 --> 00:14:58,566 I... I could help her to look for a place, if it's around here. 226 00:14:58,601 --> 00:15:01,628 She doesn't have much stuff, she doesn't need much space. 227 00:15:01,670 --> 00:15:03,366 And then what? 228 00:15:03,405 --> 00:15:06,671 You... you could move in. If you want. 229 00:15:07,910 --> 00:15:10,072 OK. Do you want? 230 00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:12,948 I do. 231 00:15:12,982 --> 00:15:14,507 I'm not selling my boat though. 232 00:15:14,550 --> 00:15:15,643 You don't have to. 233 00:15:15,684 --> 00:15:18,518 I'll be able to find a tenant, although it is very small. 234 00:15:18,554 --> 00:15:22,218 Well, look, you know, let's see if... 235 00:15:22,257 --> 00:15:25,386 Kate can find somewhere for herself 236 00:15:25,427 --> 00:15:29,694 and then... you could advertise for a tenant. 237 00:15:29,732 --> 00:15:32,395 That's probably the obvious thing to do. 238 00:15:34,370 --> 00:15:37,499 Yes. Yes, I think so. 239 00:15:44,046 --> 00:15:45,981 Cheers, Ray. 240 00:16:01,030 --> 00:16:02,965 Phone! 241 00:16:02,998 --> 00:16:04,899 The thing is, there's this house. 242 00:16:04,933 --> 00:16:07,960 I found this house and I think it could be amazing. 243 00:16:10,072 --> 00:16:11,665 Who's that? 244 00:16:11,707 --> 00:16:13,141 Da-da. 245 00:16:13,175 --> 00:16:14,905 - Hello? - ..There's this house. 246 00:16:14,943 --> 00:16:17,412 Are you on your way back? Are you on your way home? 247 00:16:17,446 --> 00:16:19,881 I found this house and I think it could be amazing. 248 00:16:19,915 --> 00:16:23,010 - Andy? - I found this amazing place. 249 00:16:23,052 --> 00:16:25,954 - Andy? - I've found a house. 250 00:16:25,988 --> 00:16:28,082 - I've found a house. - Let's listen to Daddy 251 00:16:28,123 --> 00:16:30,820 - talking to himself. - I found this house, Becky. 252 00:16:30,859 --> 00:16:36,093 I've found this... Becky, I've found a house. 253 00:16:36,131 --> 00:16:39,829 I found this house and I think it could be within our means. 254 00:16:39,868 --> 00:16:41,359 There's a lot of work to do on it 255 00:16:41,403 --> 00:16:42,837 but I could do the work myself. 256 00:16:42,871 --> 00:16:45,136 In fact, I think that's what I wanna do. 257 00:16:45,174 --> 00:16:48,269 The only thing is, I've quit my job. 258 00:16:48,310 --> 00:16:50,939 I have to tell you at this point, though, Becky. 259 00:16:50,979 --> 00:16:52,845 Not, "at this point", that's stupid. 260 00:16:52,881 --> 00:16:56,443 I have to come clean, Becky. I quit my job. 261 00:16:56,485 --> 00:16:59,819 Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. 262 00:17:04,626 --> 00:17:07,323 - Hello? - Hello? 263 00:17:07,362 --> 00:17:09,922 - Anybody home? - Anybody home? 264 00:17:15,537 --> 00:17:17,267 - What? - What? 265 00:17:26,648 --> 00:17:28,549 - Hello? - Hello? 266 00:17:32,454 --> 00:17:34,923 - Have a nice day? - Have a nice day? 267 00:17:39,461 --> 00:17:42,329 - And my mum knew? - Yeah. 268 00:17:43,699 --> 00:17:45,258 That doesn't make it all right. 269 00:17:45,300 --> 00:17:47,769 - Half makes it all right. - No, it doesn't. 270 00:17:47,803 --> 00:17:50,272 Wait till you see this house - that will make it all right. 271 00:17:50,305 --> 00:17:52,501 - So tell me what it's like. - No. 272 00:17:52,541 --> 00:17:54,772 I wanna know your first impression. 273 00:17:54,810 --> 00:17:56,836 But you have to imagine what it could be, 274 00:17:56,879 --> 00:18:00,111 so don't look at the holes in the roof or the broken window. 275 00:18:00,149 --> 00:18:03,449 - So my second impression? - Yeah, your second impression. 276 00:18:03,485 --> 00:18:05,386 How can we afford a house? 277 00:18:05,420 --> 00:18:07,321 It's an auction and there's no reserve, 278 00:18:07,356 --> 00:18:10,417 so we just take what we got and bid what we can afford. 279 00:18:10,459 --> 00:18:13,054 - We haven't got anything. - We've got some savings. 280 00:18:13,095 --> 00:18:16,395 Andy, we've got ten grand. That buys a deposit on a flat, 281 00:18:16,431 --> 00:18:19,697 not a three-bedroom cottage in half an acre of land. 282 00:18:19,735 --> 00:18:21,761 Well, if we don't try we'll never know. 283 00:18:23,005 --> 00:18:25,065 You're a dreamer. 284 00:18:25,107 --> 00:18:29,636 You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. 285 00:18:29,678 --> 00:18:32,375 - I hope some day... - I get it. 286 00:18:34,683 --> 00:18:36,083 Imagine. 287 00:18:36,118 --> 00:18:38,349 Oh, Andy, what have you fallen in love with? 288 00:18:38,387 --> 00:18:42,119 It's beautiful, isn't it? I mean, it... it could be. 289 00:18:42,157 --> 00:18:44,922 Who's gonna do the work? You? 290 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:46,656 - Yeah. - Single-handed? 291 00:18:46,695 --> 00:18:49,426 Single-handed, baby. That's what I wanna do. 292 00:18:49,464 --> 00:18:51,057 I'll be a full-time hobbyist. 293 00:18:51,099 --> 00:18:53,125 I'll take Stan to school, I'll pick him up, 294 00:18:53,168 --> 00:18:55,603 and I'll build us a house with roses round the door. 295 00:18:55,637 --> 00:18:58,903 I haven't seen you so enthused since we got back from Africa. 296 00:18:58,941 --> 00:19:01,536 So, what? You'd give up archaeology? 297 00:19:01,577 --> 00:19:04,172 Yeah. For a couple of years I would. 298 00:19:04,213 --> 00:19:06,409 And then I'll have time to fix the shingles, 299 00:19:06,448 --> 00:19:08,144 I'll have time to fix the door. 300 00:19:08,183 --> 00:19:11,585 I'll have time to oil the hinges and to mend the windows... 301 00:19:11,620 --> 00:19:13,748 Shut up. I get it. Go and find Stan. 302 00:19:13,789 --> 00:19:16,258 There could be bear traps or a hidden well. 303 00:19:16,291 --> 00:19:18,283 I'd pay extra for a hidden well. 304 00:20:03,038 --> 00:20:05,667 Froggy, froggy! Froggy! 305 00:20:10,746 --> 00:20:13,011 So, you been to an auction before? 306 00:20:13,048 --> 00:20:15,984 No, I but I see 'em every day on TV. 307 00:20:16,018 --> 00:20:18,578 Homes Under the Hammer, Property Lottery, 308 00:20:18,620 --> 00:20:20,248 Auctions-Auctions-Auctions. 309 00:20:20,289 --> 00:20:22,884 - You got the Auctions Channel? - No. 310 00:20:24,593 --> 00:20:27,688 Well, all you need is confidence. 311 00:20:27,729 --> 00:20:29,220 - Exactly. - Yeah. 312 00:20:29,264 --> 00:20:32,757 - So, how much cash you got? - About 12 grand. 313 00:20:32,801 --> 00:20:37,501 Bloody hell. Well, you're gonna need more than confidence then. 314 00:20:37,539 --> 00:20:41,271 Here, you fancy moving onto a house boat? 315 00:20:41,310 --> 00:20:44,109 Well, that would be a brilliant move with a two-year-old. 316 00:20:44,146 --> 00:20:47,275 Toni's looking for a tenant so she can move in with me. 317 00:20:47,316 --> 00:20:48,614 - Yeah? - Hmm. 318 00:20:48,650 --> 00:20:51,279 So if you hear of anyone looking for somewhere. 319 00:20:51,320 --> 00:20:53,880 What about Kate? 320 00:20:53,922 --> 00:20:58,223 Good idea. Yeah. I'll ask her if she knows anyone. 321 00:21:00,662 --> 00:21:05,657 Wait a minute! I've come up with an even better idea. 322 00:21:05,701 --> 00:21:08,000 - I am a genius. - Go on. 323 00:21:08,036 --> 00:21:10,437 Kate could move onto the narrow boat 324 00:21:10,472 --> 00:21:12,737 and they could do a straight swap. 325 00:21:12,774 --> 00:21:15,539 That is a good idea. I wish I'd thought of that. 326 00:21:15,577 --> 00:21:17,341 Yeah. Yeah. 327 00:21:17,379 --> 00:21:19,746 She doesn't get seasick like me, 328 00:21:19,781 --> 00:21:23,149 doesn't have much stuff, and she loves the boat. 329 00:21:23,185 --> 00:21:25,211 Like I say, I wish I'd thought of that. 330 00:21:25,253 --> 00:21:27,279 Housing problem fixed. 331 00:21:27,322 --> 00:21:30,451 Looks like I've come up with the perfect solution. 332 00:21:30,492 --> 00:21:33,792 Couldn't come up with a few grand for me, could you? 333 00:21:33,829 --> 00:21:37,630 Yeah. We just gotta find it. A pot of gold. 334 00:21:38,767 --> 00:21:40,395 We've got a week. 335 00:21:43,238 --> 00:21:45,366 Oh, bollocks. 336 00:21:45,407 --> 00:21:49,640 We're too late. They've... sealed it off. 337 00:21:49,678 --> 00:21:52,375 Damn! 338 00:21:52,414 --> 00:21:54,906 They must have come sometime after we left. 339 00:21:54,950 --> 00:21:58,114 If only we'd got here before they put this up. 340 00:21:58,153 --> 00:22:01,282 Ah, well. At least we tried. 341 00:22:01,323 --> 00:22:02,882 Hang on. 342 00:22:02,924 --> 00:22:04,552 What? 343 00:22:06,228 --> 00:22:08,129 There's no-one around for miles. 344 00:22:10,198 --> 00:22:12,099 What you saying? 345 00:22:12,134 --> 00:22:15,002 I don't know. It's just... 346 00:22:15,037 --> 00:22:16,437 Oh, nothing, nothing. 347 00:22:16,471 --> 00:22:20,408 No, go on. What are you thinking? 348 00:22:20,442 --> 00:22:22,343 I reckon I could get under that tape. 349 00:22:24,079 --> 00:22:25,103 What...? 350 00:22:25,147 --> 00:22:27,116 I know, you're right. It's stupid. 351 00:22:27,149 --> 00:22:31,052 No. No, I reckon you're on to something. 352 00:22:42,964 --> 00:22:46,093 Keep watch. 353 00:23:25,874 --> 00:23:27,399 Done? 354 00:23:36,518 --> 00:23:38,953 Felt good, didn't it, being an activist. 355 00:23:38,987 --> 00:23:42,685 We were like Ninjas, environmental Ninjas. 356 00:23:42,724 --> 00:23:45,489 Yeah. So, er... when do the bats turn up? 357 00:23:46,461 --> 00:23:48,123 I don't know. Tonight? 358 00:23:48,163 --> 00:23:50,758 Oh, well, you reckon they'll move straight in? 359 00:23:50,799 --> 00:23:52,495 I haven't really thought about it. 360 00:23:52,534 --> 00:23:55,163 I suppose it takes a while for them to find the boxes. 361 00:23:57,339 --> 00:24:00,434 Oh, here we are, look. 24-hour bat helpline. 362 00:24:00,475 --> 00:24:01,670 Shut up, there isn't. 363 00:24:01,710 --> 00:24:04,270 There bloody is, look. Bat Action Trust. 364 00:24:04,312 --> 00:24:09,114 After hours our calls are redirected to bat volunteers. 365 00:24:09,151 --> 00:24:10,779 Do it. 366 00:24:15,657 --> 00:24:17,387 Hello. Er... 367 00:24:18,827 --> 00:24:20,693 I'm on hold. 368 00:24:20,729 --> 00:24:22,322 Busy time. 369 00:24:22,364 --> 00:24:25,027 Oh, it's ringing. 370 00:24:25,066 --> 00:24:26,728 Ah! 371 00:24:29,371 --> 00:24:31,340 Paul, turn your phone off! 372 00:24:31,373 --> 00:24:34,537 Paul! 373 00:24:34,576 --> 00:24:37,740 Can you switch your phone to aeroplane mode, please? 374 00:24:37,779 --> 00:24:40,112 It's interfering with my Arado. 375 00:24:42,851 --> 00:24:45,821 Hello? 24-hour bat helpline. How can I help? 376 00:24:45,854 --> 00:24:48,949 Oh, yes. I've got a bat question for you - 377 00:24:48,990 --> 00:24:50,618 er... a bat query for you. 378 00:24:50,659 --> 00:24:52,389 Oh, I'll certainly do my best to help. 379 00:24:52,427 --> 00:24:55,329 What's the nature of your bat enquiry? 380 00:24:55,363 --> 00:24:58,697 Yeah. Well, basically, we've installed a bat box. 381 00:24:58,733 --> 00:25:01,100 How soon can we expect the bats to turn up? 382 00:25:01,136 --> 00:25:04,595 Well, ideally you want to plant some wildflowers 383 00:25:04,639 --> 00:25:07,131 that will attract the insects and invertebrates 384 00:25:07,175 --> 00:25:08,643 upon which the bats feed. 385 00:25:08,677 --> 00:25:11,374 Or, as we like to say, provide bed and breakfast. 386 00:25:11,413 --> 00:25:13,905 Yeah, bed and breakfast. 387 00:25:13,949 --> 00:25:16,578 Well, we haven't got time for any of that. 388 00:25:16,618 --> 00:25:19,213 What's the quickest we could expect them to... 389 00:25:19,254 --> 00:25:21,223 What's the world record? 390 00:25:21,256 --> 00:25:23,885 - Can you hurry up, please? - It's the bat phone. 391 00:25:23,925 --> 00:25:25,951 Why has it come through to you? 392 00:25:25,994 --> 00:25:28,054 I'm further up the list than you are. 393 00:25:28,096 --> 00:25:30,088 Yep. Well, it's entirely possible 394 00:25:30,131 --> 00:25:32,532 the bats may have already used the tree to roost. 395 00:25:32,567 --> 00:25:35,332 Look, I got a missed call. It's supposed to be for me. 396 00:25:35,370 --> 00:25:37,202 Let me speak to him. 397 00:25:38,740 --> 00:25:40,538 And where's this tree situated? 398 00:25:40,575 --> 00:25:42,567 Let me speak to him. 399 00:25:42,611 --> 00:25:43,874 But that's... 400 00:25:45,580 --> 00:25:46,912 Hello there. 401 00:25:46,948 --> 00:25:49,474 Bat Action Trust. 24-hour bat helpline. 402 00:25:49,517 --> 00:25:50,761 You're through to Philip Peters. 403 00:25:50,785 --> 00:25:53,812 Sorry about that. A bit of a mix-up with the switchboard. 404 00:25:53,855 --> 00:25:58,384 You're now through to a more senior member. Hello? 405 00:26:01,062 --> 00:26:04,226 Hmm, nobody there. 406 00:26:04,266 --> 00:26:07,361 What? No. What? 407 00:26:07,402 --> 00:26:11,897 You're not telling us that you two are the... the bat man. 408 00:26:11,940 --> 00:26:15,604 Oh, I see. Another hoax call, is it? 409 00:26:15,644 --> 00:26:16,873 You pull that stunt 410 00:26:16,911 --> 00:26:21,042 with one of the other emergency services, you get arrested. 411 00:26:21,082 --> 00:26:24,484 - Come on, Paul. - No. 412 00:26:24,519 --> 00:26:28,251 - Pardon? - No, Phil. This looks real. 413 00:26:28,290 --> 00:26:30,156 I think these guys need our help. 414 00:26:30,191 --> 00:26:32,092 Let me see your bat credentials. 415 00:26:41,736 --> 00:26:44,228 It's genuine. 416 00:26:44,272 --> 00:26:46,605 Where's this tree? 417 00:26:46,641 --> 00:26:48,200 Back up there. 418 00:26:49,711 --> 00:26:51,737 - Could be bats there already. - Yeah? 419 00:26:51,780 --> 00:26:54,409 - Yeah. A good area for bats. - How do we find out? 420 00:26:54,449 --> 00:26:56,645 I'll have to come back, bring my detector. 421 00:26:59,754 --> 00:27:01,188 Bat detector. 422 00:27:01,222 --> 00:27:04,920 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. The-the... hold on. 423 00:27:06,328 --> 00:27:08,854 Found a way we can be useful to you, have we? 424 00:27:08,897 --> 00:27:11,924 - Oh, here we go. - What do we get out of it? 425 00:27:11,966 --> 00:27:13,992 - What do you mean? - You get to save a tree. 426 00:27:14,035 --> 00:27:18,666 - The Bat Action Trust... - Oh, B-A-T, I just got that. 427 00:27:18,707 --> 00:27:21,006 Oh, that's clever. Is that another one of yours? 428 00:27:21,042 --> 00:27:24,638 The Bat Action Trust gives Paul and I the authority 429 00:27:24,679 --> 00:27:26,944 to slap a temporary preservation order 430 00:27:26,981 --> 00:27:28,449 on any tree we want. 431 00:27:28,483 --> 00:27:30,782 Providing, of course, we both agree 432 00:27:30,819 --> 00:27:32,845 that it is of special interest. 433 00:27:32,887 --> 00:27:38,326 So, I shall ask again, what do we get out of it? 434 00:27:38,360 --> 00:27:39,828 What do you want? 435 00:27:41,296 --> 00:27:43,265 We want that field. 436 00:27:49,237 --> 00:27:51,035 Sly bastards. 437 00:27:52,006 --> 00:27:53,907 We can't. 438 00:27:53,942 --> 00:27:56,468 Oh... I couldn't stand it. 439 00:27:56,511 --> 00:27:59,276 Imagine if he was to find the rest of my hoard 440 00:27:59,314 --> 00:28:01,442 with his crappy Arado. 441 00:28:01,483 --> 00:28:05,443 No. I'd rather nobody found it. 442 00:28:05,487 --> 00:28:07,956 Well, nobody will have a chance in a week. 443 00:28:07,989 --> 00:28:11,448 Maybe it's time to open it up, get everybody down here, 444 00:28:11,493 --> 00:28:13,485 next weekend, before we lose it. 445 00:28:13,528 --> 00:28:15,554 Oh, I don't know. 446 00:28:15,597 --> 00:28:17,896 A week to find it, mate. 447 00:28:19,734 --> 00:28:21,760 Oh, I know it's there. 448 00:28:22,937 --> 00:28:25,133 Under our feet. 449 00:28:25,173 --> 00:28:29,474 Under the lonely earth... waiting for us.