1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:21,667 --> 00:00:24,542 ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 3 00:00:24,626 --> 00:00:27,125 GEORGE CARLIN: (NARRATING) In my personal little world, 4 00:00:27,209 --> 00:00:31,542 I can't worry about offending someone 5 00:00:31,626 --> 00:00:34,959 because that's flinching. You can't flinch. 6 00:00:35,042 --> 00:00:36,417 If you mean what you're saying. 7 00:00:36,500 --> 00:00:38,918 GEORGE: (ONSTAGE) A lot of these cultural crimes 8 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:41,292 can be blamed on the baby boomers. 9 00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,667 Whiny, narcissistic, 10 00:00:43,751 --> 00:00:45,959 self-indulgent people with a simple philosophy, 11 00:00:46,042 --> 00:00:48,417 -"Give me that, it's mine!" -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 12 00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:49,834 "Give me that, it's mine!" 13 00:00:50,709 --> 00:00:51,876 (NARRATING) The line exists. 14 00:00:51,959 --> 00:00:53,918 (ONSTAGE) These people were given everything. 15 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:55,167 (NARRATING) There'll always be taboos. 16 00:00:55,250 --> 00:00:56,792 (ONSTAGE) Everything was handed to them. 17 00:00:56,876 --> 00:00:58,959 (NARRATING) Always be things that if you don't handle them 18 00:00:59,042 --> 00:01:00,959 a certain way, people will reject you. 19 00:01:01,042 --> 00:01:03,459 And they took it all. Sex, drugs, and rock and roll. 20 00:01:03,542 --> 00:01:04,834 And they stayed loaded for 20 years 21 00:01:04,918 --> 00:01:06,209 and had a free ride. 22 00:01:06,292 --> 00:01:09,792 But now, they're staring down the barrel of middle-age burnout 23 00:01:09,876 --> 00:01:13,209 and they don't like it, so they turn self-righteous. 24 00:01:13,292 --> 00:01:14,500 And they want to make things hard 25 00:01:14,584 --> 00:01:15,542 on younger people. 26 00:01:15,626 --> 00:01:17,167 As for the rock and roll, they sold that 27 00:01:17,250 --> 00:01:20,250 for television commercials a long time ago. 28 00:01:20,334 --> 00:01:22,667 But I always mean what I'm saying, 29 00:01:23,459 --> 00:01:25,042 and I just go for it. 30 00:01:25,125 --> 00:01:28,626 -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) -They're cold, bloodless people. 31 00:01:28,709 --> 00:01:30,542 It's in their slogans, it's in their rhetoric, 32 00:01:30,626 --> 00:01:33,292 "No pain, no gain." "Just do it." 33 00:01:33,375 --> 00:01:37,083 "Life is short, play hard." "Shit happens. Deal with it." 34 00:01:37,167 --> 00:01:39,667 "Get at a life." These people went from, "Do your own thing," 35 00:01:39,751 --> 00:01:41,834 -to, "Just say no." -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 36 00:01:41,918 --> 00:01:43,667 They went from, "Love is all you need," 37 00:01:43,751 --> 00:01:46,125 to, "Whoever winds up with the most toys wins." 38 00:01:46,209 --> 00:01:48,876 And they went from cocaine to Rogaine. 39 00:01:48,959 --> 00:01:51,167 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) -They did. 40 00:01:56,042 --> 00:01:58,709 Fuck these boomers. Fuck these yuppies, 41 00:01:58,792 --> 00:02:01,125 and fuck everybody now that I think of it. 42 00:02:01,209 --> 00:02:02,918 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 43 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,250 ♪ (EPIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 44 00:02:04,334 --> 00:02:07,042 Here's George Carlin! 45 00:02:07,125 --> 00:02:10,876 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 46 00:02:10,959 --> 00:02:13,250 CHIEF JUSTICE: I, Ronald Reagan, do solemnly swear... 47 00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:15,876 RONALD REAGAN: I, Ronald Reagan, do solemnly swear... 48 00:02:15,959 --> 00:02:18,542 -How you doing, doc? -I'm doing great there, Georgie. 49 00:02:18,626 --> 00:02:20,459 REAGAN: ...that I will faithfully execute the office 50 00:02:20,542 --> 00:02:22,500 of President of the United States. 51 00:02:22,584 --> 00:02:23,876 We just got back from the, uh, 52 00:02:23,959 --> 00:02:25,918 inaugural festivities in Washington. 53 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:29,834 Thank God for a president who agrees in totality 54 00:02:29,918 --> 00:02:32,751 of what we morally stand for here. 55 00:02:32,834 --> 00:02:34,834 MAN: We must have not only a government 56 00:02:34,918 --> 00:02:36,292 that defends freedom. 57 00:02:36,375 --> 00:02:40,167 We must have a government that defends the right to life. 58 00:02:40,250 --> 00:02:42,250 (CHANTING) Fight back, fight AIDS! 59 00:02:42,334 --> 00:02:45,334 REPORTER: Falwell's July issue of Moral Majority Report 60 00:02:45,417 --> 00:02:46,584 charges the American family 61 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,709 is now threatened by the AIDS epidemic. 62 00:02:48,792 --> 00:02:51,083 REAGAN: Protect and defend the Constitution 63 00:02:51,167 --> 00:02:52,250 of the United States. 64 00:02:52,334 --> 00:02:53,959 Well, it's a wait-and-see for some folks, 65 00:02:54,042 --> 00:02:55,542 you know, but he's the only one we got. 66 00:02:55,626 --> 00:02:56,959 That's what I keep hearing people say, 67 00:02:57,042 --> 00:02:59,083 "Well, he's the only president we have." 68 00:02:59,167 --> 00:03:01,709 -So help you God. -So help me God. 69 00:03:08,876 --> 00:03:10,209 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ 70 00:03:10,959 --> 00:03:13,292 ♪ (GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 71 00:03:15,125 --> 00:03:17,375 KELLY CARLIN: In the early '80s, 72 00:03:17,459 --> 00:03:22,459 he was still very disconnected as a human being. 73 00:03:23,709 --> 00:03:26,042 He was fully aware that he was always compartmentalizing 74 00:03:26,125 --> 00:03:27,542 his head from his heart. 75 00:03:27,626 --> 00:03:31,292 Like he'd say, "I live from here up," you know. 76 00:03:31,375 --> 00:03:33,876 I think in some ways it's all he knew how to do 77 00:03:33,959 --> 00:03:36,250 was go on the road and get on a stage. 78 00:03:39,083 --> 00:03:42,500 After Mom was sober, she said to my dad, 79 00:03:42,584 --> 00:03:47,500 "You cannot bring cocaine in the house ever again." 80 00:03:47,584 --> 00:03:51,959 And he absolutely abided by that rule. 81 00:03:52,042 --> 00:03:53,959 But my dad wasn't quite ready to quit 82 00:03:54,042 --> 00:03:55,250 and didn't quit. 83 00:03:55,334 --> 00:03:56,417 And he would have these binges. 84 00:03:56,500 --> 00:03:58,918 He would disappear for two or three days. 85 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,459 Twice I remember that happening. 86 00:04:00,542 --> 00:04:02,792 A terrifying two or three days, him gone, 87 00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:04,250 have no idea where he is. 88 00:04:05,792 --> 00:04:06,959 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ 89 00:04:07,042 --> 00:04:10,167 JERRY HAMZA: He had to have a buzz going all the time. 90 00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:13,334 But he always got through his shows. 91 00:04:13,417 --> 00:04:17,000 He got through his shows. Sometimes he would stop on stage 92 00:04:17,083 --> 00:04:18,500 and forget a line, 93 00:04:18,584 --> 00:04:23,500 but the people were always very forgiving with him and... 94 00:04:23,584 --> 00:04:25,459 God, you'd look at the stage afterwards, 95 00:04:25,542 --> 00:04:27,959 there'd be 20 joints on the stage. 96 00:04:28,042 --> 00:04:30,959 They'd just throw them up on stage. (LAUGHS) 97 00:04:31,042 --> 00:04:32,792 He took them sometimes too. 98 00:04:32,876 --> 00:04:33,918 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 99 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,125 JERRY: He loved his work, 100 00:04:35,209 --> 00:04:37,500 and that's where he really lived, in the trees. 101 00:04:37,584 --> 00:04:38,876 He lived in his own head. 102 00:04:38,959 --> 00:04:40,459 Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. 103 00:04:40,542 --> 00:04:41,959 My name is George Carlin, 104 00:04:42,042 --> 00:04:44,000 and I am a professional comedian. 105 00:04:44,083 --> 00:04:45,167 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 106 00:04:45,250 --> 00:04:47,375 As opposed to the kind you run into at work 107 00:04:47,459 --> 00:04:49,292 -all day long. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 108 00:04:49,375 --> 00:04:50,500 JERRY: Even though the albums 109 00:04:50,584 --> 00:04:53,167 in that time period were subsiding, 110 00:04:53,250 --> 00:04:56,667 he used to do the Johnny Carson Show maybe 111 00:04:56,751 --> 00:04:59,083 six days a year, you know, as a fill-in. 112 00:04:59,167 --> 00:05:01,042 What you do is you pump out 30 pounds of pressure. 113 00:05:01,125 --> 00:05:02,792 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -And then you keep, you see-- 114 00:05:02,876 --> 00:05:04,500 And it keeps... You see what it does. 115 00:05:04,584 --> 00:05:05,959 -I love that. -And it keeps the-- 116 00:05:06,042 --> 00:05:07,167 I want one of those. 117 00:05:07,250 --> 00:05:09,500 JERRY: And between that and what was left of the albums, 118 00:05:09,584 --> 00:05:12,542 -we could do business. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 119 00:05:14,584 --> 00:05:16,500 JERRY: But I thought there was a lot more there. 120 00:05:16,584 --> 00:05:19,209 I always thought there was a lot more there. 121 00:05:19,292 --> 00:05:20,500 Say, that doesn't feel bad, you know? 122 00:05:20,584 --> 00:05:22,042 -Oh, yeah. Yeah. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 123 00:05:22,125 --> 00:05:24,125 And what's really funny is, I think about George 124 00:05:24,209 --> 00:05:28,500 so many times telling me, "I'm really practical." 125 00:05:28,584 --> 00:05:29,876 And every time he'd say that, 126 00:05:29,959 --> 00:05:32,334 I almost laughed right in his face. 127 00:05:32,417 --> 00:05:33,500 I think a lot of us 128 00:05:33,584 --> 00:05:35,584 who sat in the movie theaters of America as kids, 129 00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:37,918 when we decided we wanted to be in show business, 130 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,292 -we thought of movies... -JERRY: Anyway, 131 00:05:39,375 --> 00:05:42,584 what had happened was this. He had been trying to do a movie 132 00:05:42,667 --> 00:05:45,083 called The Illustrated George Carlin. 133 00:05:45,167 --> 00:05:47,250 So now I'm finally taking that step for myself. 134 00:05:47,334 --> 00:05:48,834 I, uh, I have a film idea, 135 00:05:48,918 --> 00:05:50,626 it's called The Illustrated George Carlin. 136 00:05:50,709 --> 00:05:52,125 We're doing it outside of the studios. 137 00:05:52,209 --> 00:05:54,292 We're not-- We haven't fooled with them. 138 00:05:54,375 --> 00:05:55,626 We have money independently. 139 00:05:55,709 --> 00:05:59,334 And I says, "Well, how much money have you raised so far?" 140 00:05:59,417 --> 00:06:00,667 And he says, "None." 141 00:06:00,751 --> 00:06:02,125 When are you going to have this together? 142 00:06:02,209 --> 00:06:03,542 Should take another eight months or so. 143 00:06:03,626 --> 00:06:07,876 (CHUCKLES) This was after three years of paying salaries 144 00:06:07,959 --> 00:06:09,417 and everything that goes with it. 145 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:10,876 ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 146 00:06:10,959 --> 00:06:14,709 JERRY: And then he didn't pay his taxes properly 147 00:06:14,792 --> 00:06:16,959 for like three years. 148 00:06:17,042 --> 00:06:18,626 Well, let me tell you something. 149 00:06:18,709 --> 00:06:20,584 You figure it out with your accountant, 150 00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:23,292 and you start adding the penalties and interests 151 00:06:23,375 --> 00:06:24,542 and everything else. 152 00:06:24,626 --> 00:06:27,417 Plus, the new money and the taxes on that. 153 00:06:27,500 --> 00:06:30,667 Plus, he was supporting three families. 154 00:06:30,751 --> 00:06:32,584 He was supporting his daughter's family, 155 00:06:32,667 --> 00:06:37,500 his brother's family, and, uh, his own family. 156 00:06:37,584 --> 00:06:40,125 So it was a struggle. 157 00:06:40,209 --> 00:06:41,709 ♪ (SLOW MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 158 00:06:41,792 --> 00:06:46,500 GEORGE: I think Jerry didn't tell me the awful truth. 159 00:06:46,584 --> 00:06:49,375 Boy, it really looks fucking bleak 160 00:06:49,459 --> 00:06:50,876 and it's getting worse. 161 00:06:52,042 --> 00:06:53,667 And I have walked away 162 00:06:53,751 --> 00:06:56,042 from this Illustrated George Carlin thing. 163 00:06:56,125 --> 00:06:58,125 That whole thing collapsed in flames, 164 00:06:58,209 --> 00:07:00,083 and I cried on the phone to Brenda. 165 00:07:00,167 --> 00:07:01,667 "I said, "It's over, I can't do this. 166 00:07:01,751 --> 00:07:02,834 It's not going to work." 167 00:07:02,918 --> 00:07:05,876 And I'm driving down to Dayton from Toronto, 168 00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:08,000 and I drank a lot of beer on the way. 169 00:07:08,083 --> 00:07:12,334 And I finally crashed my car into a fucking pole, 170 00:07:12,417 --> 00:07:14,667 completely demolishing my nose. 171 00:07:14,751 --> 00:07:17,792 I'm working on a new nose. You might have heard that. 172 00:07:17,876 --> 00:07:20,000 I redesigned a Volvo last month. 173 00:07:20,083 --> 00:07:21,584 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 174 00:07:21,667 --> 00:07:23,500 GEORGE: I never did quite get through that windshield 175 00:07:23,584 --> 00:07:24,667 like they said in the paper. 176 00:07:24,751 --> 00:07:26,000 But, uh, they're working on the nose for me. 177 00:07:26,083 --> 00:07:27,459 Next year, they're gonna shine it and buff it 178 00:07:27,542 --> 00:07:29,709 -and do something to it. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 179 00:07:29,792 --> 00:07:30,876 GEORGE: It's my new nose 180 00:07:30,959 --> 00:07:33,292 and I promise this time not to blow it. Okay? 181 00:07:33,375 --> 00:07:35,792 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 182 00:07:35,876 --> 00:07:39,709 ♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪ 183 00:07:51,959 --> 00:07:55,375 JERRY: By now, the business was in the sewer. 184 00:07:55,459 --> 00:07:58,584 So, shit, we were lucky to go out and pay for the flights 185 00:07:58,667 --> 00:08:00,167 and pay the opening act. 186 00:08:01,459 --> 00:08:04,000 And I'd get on the phone to get an interview, 187 00:08:04,083 --> 00:08:06,209 and what do you think they wanted to talk about? 188 00:08:06,292 --> 00:08:08,834 Only one thing. Drugs. 189 00:08:08,918 --> 00:08:10,042 HOST: You made a reference earlier 190 00:08:10,125 --> 00:08:12,334 -to your drug history. -Yeah. 191 00:08:12,417 --> 00:08:14,000 HOST: Are you... Is that all gone completely? 192 00:08:14,083 --> 00:08:15,167 Absolutely. Yeah. And, uh, 193 00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:17,083 well, it was only the one drug, you know. (CHUCKLES) 194 00:08:17,167 --> 00:08:18,500 -The cocaine. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 195 00:08:18,584 --> 00:08:22,000 Uh, and occasionally, you'd take a little something else with it, 196 00:08:22,083 --> 00:08:24,751 but I was never, uh, a person who did anything 197 00:08:24,834 --> 00:08:26,459 but as much cocaine as there was 198 00:08:26,542 --> 00:08:28,083 in the immediate three-county area 199 00:08:28,167 --> 00:08:29,584 -at that time. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 200 00:08:29,667 --> 00:08:30,959 GEORGE: But, you know, all you can do 201 00:08:31,042 --> 00:08:33,167 is talk about the truth because it happened to you. 202 00:08:38,292 --> 00:08:40,417 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 203 00:08:42,959 --> 00:08:44,834 COMMENTATOR: As he sort of checked himself, 204 00:08:44,918 --> 00:08:46,292 David Huff at the defense. 205 00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:50,626 JERRY: I had tickets to see the Mets, 206 00:08:50,709 --> 00:08:54,834 who George loved, play the Dodgers, who he hated. 207 00:08:54,918 --> 00:08:56,000 I need one. Fernando! 208 00:08:56,083 --> 00:08:59,250 JERRY: And Fernando Valenzuela was pitching. 209 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:05,834 "George told me, "Jerry, I got a little something in my chest. 210 00:09:05,918 --> 00:09:07,209 I don't know what the hell it is. 211 00:09:07,292 --> 00:09:10,667 "Maybe it was those hot dogs. We better get out of here." 212 00:09:11,876 --> 00:09:15,542 Los Angeles fans are notorious for leaving early, 213 00:09:15,626 --> 00:09:18,626 but because they were winning, they stuck around. 214 00:09:18,709 --> 00:09:20,459 And I'm glad they did. 215 00:09:20,542 --> 00:09:23,459 'Cause we went downstairs, got in a limo, 216 00:09:23,542 --> 00:09:25,876 and by now, George is going like this. 217 00:09:25,959 --> 00:09:30,209 He's stretching his chest. He's opening his shirt. 218 00:09:30,292 --> 00:09:31,626 And the driver, I says, 219 00:09:31,709 --> 00:09:34,584 "You better go like hell to the hospital in Santa Monica." 220 00:09:34,667 --> 00:09:38,250 We were doing 110 miles an hour. 221 00:09:38,334 --> 00:09:40,792 And he got us there, thank goodness. 222 00:09:41,500 --> 00:09:42,834 He was almost dead. 223 00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:48,167 KELLY: They were really not sure those first 48 hours 224 00:09:48,250 --> 00:09:50,500 what was going to go down, what was going to happen. 225 00:09:50,584 --> 00:09:54,250 And my mom was told to go say goodbye to my dad. 226 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,167 I think that scared the shit out of him. 227 00:09:58,250 --> 00:10:02,167 That heart attack really put the cocaine in its place. 228 00:10:02,250 --> 00:10:04,584 Because he knew he had a ticking time bomb 229 00:10:04,667 --> 00:10:06,334 in his chest 230 00:10:06,417 --> 00:10:08,250 His father did drop dead. 231 00:10:10,876 --> 00:10:11,959 JERRY: It was pretty horrible 232 00:10:12,042 --> 00:10:14,542 because he was taking all these blood thinners. 233 00:10:14,626 --> 00:10:16,542 He'd show up on a plane and, you know, 234 00:10:16,626 --> 00:10:18,417 his hands would be purple. 235 00:10:19,584 --> 00:10:23,542 And he had a hammer hanging over his head. 236 00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:29,876 HOST: Here's George Carlin. 237 00:10:29,959 --> 00:10:32,876 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 238 00:10:38,042 --> 00:10:39,334 (CHEERING STOPS) 239 00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:44,959 -(DEVICE CLICKING) -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 240 00:10:45,042 --> 00:10:46,626 This is one of the new artificial hearts, 241 00:10:46,709 --> 00:10:49,542 which I was given following my recent illness. 242 00:10:49,626 --> 00:10:51,459 They just... (CLICKS TONGUE) ...put them right in. 243 00:10:51,542 --> 00:10:53,500 And for those of you at home who are do-it-yourselfers, 244 00:10:53,584 --> 00:10:55,667 these are available at RadioShack. 245 00:10:55,751 --> 00:10:57,626 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 246 00:10:59,042 --> 00:11:00,375 I just thought I'd bring you up to date 247 00:11:00,459 --> 00:11:03,042 on the comedian's health sweepstakes. 248 00:11:03,125 --> 00:11:08,584 I am now ahead of Richard Pryor in heart attacks. Two to one. 249 00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:11,542 And Richard is ahead of me on burning yourself up. 250 00:11:14,667 --> 00:11:16,042 Richard is leading on that. 251 00:11:21,375 --> 00:11:22,709 See, the way it happened was, uh, 252 00:11:22,792 --> 00:11:24,209 first, Richard had a heart attack, 253 00:11:24,292 --> 00:11:25,792 uh, then I had a heart attack, 254 00:11:25,876 --> 00:11:27,375 and then Richard burned himself up. 255 00:11:27,459 --> 00:11:29,834 And then I said, "I think I'll have another heart attack." 256 00:11:29,918 --> 00:11:31,876 -(CHUCKLES) -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 257 00:11:31,959 --> 00:11:35,250 Are you happy, George Carlin, at, what is it, 45? 258 00:11:35,334 --> 00:11:37,125 GEORGE: Well, I'm happier than I was, say, 259 00:11:37,209 --> 00:11:39,292 a year ago, or even six months ago. 260 00:11:39,375 --> 00:11:40,751 Uh, since the heart attack, 261 00:11:40,834 --> 00:11:42,167 I've had to take a very close look 262 00:11:42,250 --> 00:11:44,751 at how I manage stress, how I handle it, 263 00:11:44,834 --> 00:11:47,000 and apparently, not very well in the past. 264 00:11:47,083 --> 00:11:49,042 I'm one of those people who denies feelings. 265 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:51,709 "No, that's not happening. Couldn't be. No, never mind." 266 00:11:51,792 --> 00:11:53,626 "What, they did that to me? No sweat." 267 00:11:53,709 --> 00:11:54,918 "There's another day tomorrow." 268 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,626 And I never expressed my anger or my sadness. 269 00:11:57,709 --> 00:11:58,626 You really did feel it. 270 00:11:58,709 --> 00:11:59,959 I mean, all of that stuff coming out 271 00:12:00,042 --> 00:12:01,125 was just so much of a guise? 272 00:12:01,209 --> 00:12:03,459 I got so good at it. No, but you get so good at it 273 00:12:03,542 --> 00:12:05,209 that you don't know you're doing it. 274 00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:07,125 Do you ever look back at the George Carlin 275 00:12:07,209 --> 00:12:10,876 that was eight years ago and wonder who he was? No? 276 00:12:10,959 --> 00:12:14,959 Well, he's great. He was fine. He was just a little crazier. 277 00:12:15,042 --> 00:12:17,500 Just a little... Didn't know what he was doing. 278 00:12:17,584 --> 00:12:19,000 Didn't know what he needed, you know. 279 00:12:19,083 --> 00:12:21,959 We had-- We had tough years to go through together. 280 00:12:22,042 --> 00:12:24,500 I'm talking for my wife and me now, together. 281 00:12:24,584 --> 00:12:28,667 And I was just responding to being a hit, an overnight. 282 00:12:28,751 --> 00:12:30,876 You know, suddenly, here's all this stuff happening to me, 283 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,083 and I had this money. 284 00:12:32,167 --> 00:12:35,334 And that takes some adjustment, you know, so... 285 00:12:35,417 --> 00:12:38,375 He was fine. He was who he needed to be at that time. 286 00:12:38,459 --> 00:12:40,626 ♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 287 00:13:25,709 --> 00:13:27,042 HOST: You've got some dates coming up. 288 00:13:27,125 --> 00:13:29,083 GEORGE: Yeah, well, I'm gonna do Carnegie Hall 289 00:13:29,167 --> 00:13:32,042 and we're taping it that night for my own production company. 290 00:13:32,125 --> 00:13:34,125 And it's going to be our first cable release. 291 00:13:34,209 --> 00:13:35,751 -HOST: Fantastic. -GEORGE: So I'm in business 292 00:13:35,834 --> 00:13:37,542 for myself with my partner, Jerry Hamza. 293 00:13:37,626 --> 00:13:40,626 For a change, I'm going to get to keep some of this stuff. 294 00:13:40,709 --> 00:13:41,792 I just want to say 295 00:13:41,876 --> 00:13:43,709 I'm really happy to be here in Carnegie Hall. 296 00:13:43,792 --> 00:13:46,209 Andrew Carnegie is dead, but I figure fuck him. 297 00:13:46,918 --> 00:13:47,792 We've just found out 298 00:13:47,876 --> 00:13:50,042 that everyone is in the wrong seat. 299 00:13:50,125 --> 00:13:53,751 Would you please change places with the person two seats over 300 00:13:53,834 --> 00:13:55,667 and four seats down? 301 00:13:55,751 --> 00:13:57,751 Now, there are also you people that are sitting 302 00:13:57,834 --> 00:13:59,834 in what is known as the boxes. 303 00:13:59,918 --> 00:14:01,500 I don't want you to get horny on anything, 304 00:14:01,584 --> 00:14:03,584 'cause... Work out something about the word boxes. 305 00:14:03,667 --> 00:14:05,542 You'll think of it, George, you're a clever guy. 306 00:14:07,292 --> 00:14:08,292 Do a stand-up about-- 307 00:14:08,375 --> 00:14:10,042 Take the thing about a place for your stuff, 308 00:14:10,125 --> 00:14:12,292 your house, your home. And take it from there 309 00:14:12,375 --> 00:14:13,918 and do a whole thing about what's in the house 310 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:17,167 and what's in the home. That's where keep your stuff, 311 00:14:17,250 --> 00:14:18,542 that's where you keep your stuff. 312 00:14:18,626 --> 00:14:20,834 And you start in talking about what stuff is in what room 313 00:14:20,918 --> 00:14:22,209 and how you keep it. 314 00:14:22,292 --> 00:14:25,709 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 315 00:14:25,792 --> 00:14:28,125 -Hi there. How are you? -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 316 00:14:28,626 --> 00:14:29,834 How you doing? 317 00:14:30,834 --> 00:14:33,250 How are you doing? Good evening, everybody. 318 00:14:33,334 --> 00:14:34,792 Hello there. Thank you. 319 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:39,792 KEVIN SMITH: I remember when we finally got HBO 320 00:14:39,876 --> 00:14:41,167 in our neck of the woods, 321 00:14:41,250 --> 00:14:45,042 and they announced Carlin at Carnegie. 322 00:14:45,125 --> 00:14:48,792 It was so early in the days of HBO and having cable 323 00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:52,375 that we didn't have the terminology for it. 324 00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,584 My father one day came in to me and he goes, 325 00:14:54,667 --> 00:14:56,542 "George Carlin is going to be telling jokes 326 00:14:56,626 --> 00:14:58,459 on HBO for over an hour." 327 00:14:58,542 --> 00:15:01,125 I'd like to begin our show with a prayer. 328 00:15:01,209 --> 00:15:03,667 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 329 00:15:03,751 --> 00:15:06,167 A little prayer that I wrote myself. 330 00:15:06,250 --> 00:15:08,209 Our Father who art in Heaven 331 00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:12,167 and to the republic for which it stands. 332 00:15:12,250 --> 00:15:14,083 (LAUGHS) 333 00:15:14,167 --> 00:15:16,542 Please God, let me do a good show tonight. 334 00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:22,209 -Don't let me be an asshole. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 335 00:15:22,292 --> 00:15:24,709 Don't let anyone yell, "too late." 336 00:15:24,792 --> 00:15:27,000 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 337 00:15:27,083 --> 00:15:30,626 Let the people really enjoy my jokes tonight. 338 00:15:30,709 --> 00:15:33,751 Let me arrive safely back at my hotel. 339 00:15:33,834 --> 00:15:37,250 Help me find some shoes I really like. 340 00:15:37,334 --> 00:15:39,918 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 341 00:15:41,083 --> 00:15:44,209 Help me also to find a nymphomaniac coke connection 342 00:15:44,292 --> 00:15:46,125 who owns a Ferrari dealership. 343 00:15:46,209 --> 00:15:48,459 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 344 00:15:48,542 --> 00:15:50,626 KEVIN: Nobody was allowed to curse in our house, 345 00:15:50,709 --> 00:15:53,042 but George Carlin was allowed. 346 00:15:53,125 --> 00:15:57,083 And when he was laughing with George Carlin, 347 00:15:57,167 --> 00:15:59,459 Dad went away and there was Don Smith, 348 00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:00,792 some motherfucker I didn't know, 349 00:16:00,876 --> 00:16:02,709 but then my mother fucked. You know? 350 00:16:02,792 --> 00:16:05,417 So in those moments, I really got to see 351 00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:08,209 who he was, and what he found funny. 352 00:16:08,292 --> 00:16:11,250 I was, uh, gonna say to you, 353 00:16:11,334 --> 00:16:15,584 in fact, I'm going to say that I was awfully nervous 354 00:16:15,667 --> 00:16:17,042 and a little tight too. 355 00:16:17,125 --> 00:16:18,751 I guess that's the same thing, you know. 356 00:16:18,834 --> 00:16:20,667 I'm just glad to be home and I'm glad to be... 357 00:16:20,751 --> 00:16:24,667 (VOCALIZING) ...in New York and back in the borough... 358 00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:26,834 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) -...and saying, "Hello! 359 00:16:26,918 --> 00:16:29,000 How are you?" 360 00:16:29,083 --> 00:16:33,000 This is my office. That's what it is, my office. 361 00:16:33,083 --> 00:16:34,709 Let's face it. If this is my job, 362 00:16:34,792 --> 00:16:36,334 shit, this has gotta be my office. 363 00:16:36,417 --> 00:16:38,250 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 364 00:16:38,334 --> 00:16:41,167 GEORGE: Actually, this is just a place for my stuff. 365 00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:43,125 It's all you need, really is a place for your stuff. 366 00:16:43,209 --> 00:16:45,417 That's what life's all about, when you think about it, 367 00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:48,667 trying to find a place to keep your stuff. 368 00:16:48,751 --> 00:16:50,125 Everybody's got to have a little place 369 00:16:50,209 --> 00:16:51,918 to keep their stuff. That's why you have pockets. 370 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,500 That's why you have glove compartments. 371 00:16:53,584 --> 00:16:55,918 That's why they have lockers at the bus station. 372 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,876 That's all your house is, really, when you think about it. 373 00:16:58,959 --> 00:17:02,209 That's all your house is, it's a place for your stuff. 374 00:17:02,292 --> 00:17:05,542 Hey, if you didn't have so much goddamn stuff, 375 00:17:05,626 --> 00:17:08,876 -you wouldn't need a house. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 376 00:17:08,959 --> 00:17:11,626 GEORGE: Sometimes, you go to someone else's house, 377 00:17:11,709 --> 00:17:13,292 first thing you notice in someone else's house 378 00:17:13,375 --> 00:17:16,000 is you don't quite feel a 100 percent at home. 379 00:17:16,459 --> 00:17:17,626 You know why? 380 00:17:17,709 --> 00:17:20,959 -No room for your stuff. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 381 00:17:21,042 --> 00:17:24,292 Someone else's shit is on the table. 382 00:17:24,375 --> 00:17:26,250 Have you noticed that their stuff is shit 383 00:17:26,334 --> 00:17:30,083 -and your shit is stuff? -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) 384 00:17:30,167 --> 00:17:32,250 -"Get it off!" -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 385 00:17:32,334 --> 00:17:36,292 "Get that shit off of there and let me put my stuff down." 386 00:17:38,626 --> 00:17:40,626 JERRY SEINFELD: A place for my stuff 387 00:17:40,709 --> 00:17:44,959 is highly intellectual if you look at the skill level, 388 00:17:45,042 --> 00:17:49,292 the brainpower it takes to break that down. 389 00:17:49,375 --> 00:17:52,876 That is, you know, I don't know, maybe to some comedians, 390 00:17:52,959 --> 00:17:56,834 that's just a... observational comedy bit. 391 00:17:56,918 --> 00:18:00,083 To me, it's the elevation of the ordinary 392 00:18:00,167 --> 00:18:02,584 and the disassembling of the ordinary. 393 00:18:02,667 --> 00:18:07,709 And that's... There's no better example of that than that bit. 394 00:18:07,792 --> 00:18:10,918 In essence, it seems like this light-hearted, 395 00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:14,584 superficial analysis of, like, the way people value 396 00:18:14,667 --> 00:18:15,792 their own belongings 397 00:18:15,876 --> 00:18:18,959 and how they display them and those types of things. 398 00:18:19,042 --> 00:18:23,250 But, "My shit is stuff, and your stuff is shit" 399 00:18:23,334 --> 00:18:25,792 really is the through-line 400 00:18:25,876 --> 00:18:27,959 for the lack of empathy of people. 401 00:18:28,042 --> 00:18:30,250 Like, even when you think about cancel culture, 402 00:18:30,334 --> 00:18:33,584 things like that, "My opinion is valid 403 00:18:33,667 --> 00:18:36,292 but your opinion is cancel culture and bullshit," 404 00:18:36,375 --> 00:18:41,751 like, "My thoughts are stuff and your thoughts are shit." 405 00:18:41,834 --> 00:18:43,959 And it's just this little bit that he did 406 00:18:44,876 --> 00:18:47,959 on shit you put on your dresser. 407 00:18:48,042 --> 00:18:49,959 -Thank you very much. Goodnight. -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 408 00:18:50,042 --> 00:18:51,709 And I hope I see you another time. 409 00:18:51,792 --> 00:18:55,292 Good night, all. Have a good time, you. Bye-bye. 410 00:18:55,375 --> 00:18:57,209 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) -Thank you. 411 00:18:57,292 --> 00:18:58,959 -Thank you very much. -JERRY: After the show, 412 00:18:59,042 --> 00:19:02,125 George was in tears in the dressing room. 413 00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:03,375 See you later. 414 00:19:03,459 --> 00:19:04,876 JERRY: Because he thought, "Oh, it could have been 415 00:19:04,959 --> 00:19:07,626 so much better if I could've had two shows." 416 00:19:07,709 --> 00:19:09,167 "There were so many little things 417 00:19:09,250 --> 00:19:11,292 that I could have changed." 418 00:19:11,375 --> 00:19:14,500 But the show came out and it exploded. 419 00:19:14,584 --> 00:19:15,626 ♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 420 00:19:15,709 --> 00:19:17,000 JERRY: And that's what got it going again. 421 00:19:17,083 --> 00:19:19,667 GEORGE: Hello, good morning. How are you? 422 00:19:19,751 --> 00:19:22,500 What's going on? What's new? What's happening? 423 00:19:22,584 --> 00:19:24,375 Good evening. Hello. How is it going? 424 00:19:24,459 --> 00:19:26,417 And what the fuck's new with you? 425 00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:27,626 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 426 00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:29,918 JERRY: But he still was the guy whose back 427 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,417 is up against the wall with the government. 428 00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,042 And I used to get a call every Tuesday 429 00:19:35,125 --> 00:19:36,959 from this guy at the IRS, 430 00:19:37,042 --> 00:19:39,250 "How did we do over the weekend?" 431 00:19:39,334 --> 00:19:41,125 I think a lot of you know that I've been through 432 00:19:41,209 --> 00:19:43,250 -several changes in my career. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 433 00:19:43,334 --> 00:19:44,584 JERRY: He couldn't catch up. 434 00:19:44,667 --> 00:19:46,417 I'm just hoping you'll hang in there 435 00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:48,417 with me one more time. 436 00:19:48,500 --> 00:19:50,083 A lot of comedians tell you what they did. 437 00:19:50,167 --> 00:19:51,751 Well, you know, I went-- I was down... 438 00:19:51,834 --> 00:19:53,334 HBO fed the box office 439 00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:54,375 all across the country. 440 00:19:54,459 --> 00:19:55,542 You can tell by listening, 441 00:19:55,626 --> 00:19:58,209 this guy has never been near a psychiatrist. 442 00:19:58,292 --> 00:20:01,792 So, I was able to keep touring, and earn money. 443 00:20:01,876 --> 00:20:03,542 If I tell you something happened, 444 00:20:03,626 --> 00:20:06,250 -it fucking happened, okay? -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 445 00:20:06,918 --> 00:20:08,209 GEORGE: And slowly, 446 00:20:08,292 --> 00:20:11,125 I was just learning how to produce more material, 447 00:20:11,209 --> 00:20:13,375 because I had a need, I had to stay out there. 448 00:20:13,459 --> 00:20:14,584 Have you ever been talking to someone 449 00:20:14,667 --> 00:20:16,876 and a little bit of spit flies off your tongue... 450 00:20:16,959 --> 00:20:17,918 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 451 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,459 ...and lands right on the man's nose? 452 00:20:20,542 --> 00:20:22,250 Do you ever pour glue on a bird? 453 00:20:22,334 --> 00:20:23,792 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 454 00:20:23,876 --> 00:20:26,292 Of course not. You don't have to. 455 00:20:26,375 --> 00:20:27,626 You ever been sitting in the movies? 456 00:20:27,709 --> 00:20:28,959 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 457 00:20:29,042 --> 00:20:31,959 GEORGE: But I wasn't really going anywhere in my thinking. 458 00:20:32,042 --> 00:20:35,000 Here's something you don't know. I never fucked a ten, 459 00:20:35,083 --> 00:20:37,250 but one night, I fucked five twos. 460 00:20:37,334 --> 00:20:38,792 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 461 00:20:38,876 --> 00:20:41,250 GEORGE: I had to find my voice. 462 00:20:41,334 --> 00:20:45,250 Some guys will fuck anybody. Not me. Not anymore. 463 00:20:45,334 --> 00:20:47,459 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 464 00:20:47,542 --> 00:20:50,083 Not since herpes and AIDS are going around. 465 00:20:50,167 --> 00:20:51,792 In fact, just to be on the safe side, 466 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,000 I'm not even jerking off anymore. 467 00:20:54,083 --> 00:20:55,083 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 468 00:20:55,167 --> 00:20:56,834 Well, I don't know where I've been. 469 00:20:56,918 --> 00:20:58,667 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 470 00:21:01,751 --> 00:21:04,876 KELLY: He was a road comic till the day he died. 471 00:21:04,959 --> 00:21:08,083 It was his art form. It's how he made his living. 472 00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:11,918 And he had an enormous amount of financial pressure. 473 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,292 So he really had no choice. 474 00:21:14,375 --> 00:21:16,626 Because the IRS threatened to take their house away 475 00:21:16,709 --> 00:21:19,125 all the time. That was the leverage. 476 00:21:19,209 --> 00:21:21,751 And that house was everything to my mother. 477 00:21:21,834 --> 00:21:23,334 And then my mom was alone all the time. 478 00:21:23,417 --> 00:21:25,125 She didn't have her life partner. 479 00:21:25,209 --> 00:21:26,667 She didn't have her guy. 480 00:21:26,751 --> 00:21:27,751 And she was like, 481 00:21:27,834 --> 00:21:29,209 "You need to figure this out differently 482 00:21:29,292 --> 00:21:31,792 because we need to have a life together." 483 00:21:31,876 --> 00:21:34,000 So they started going out on dates 484 00:21:34,083 --> 00:21:35,709 and having lunches together. 485 00:21:35,792 --> 00:21:39,083 And then he actually began taking vacations. 486 00:21:39,167 --> 00:21:40,834 GEORGE: I'm coming in on you now. 487 00:21:40,918 --> 00:21:42,918 -Zeroing in. -I am too. 488 00:21:44,375 --> 00:21:46,209 GEORGE: Just perfect. 489 00:21:47,375 --> 00:21:48,459 Brenda. 490 00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:50,709 What? 491 00:21:52,459 --> 00:21:54,500 GEORGE: Looks great. What a good shot. 492 00:21:59,459 --> 00:22:03,667 KELLY: When all of the noise of the drugs and alcohol left 493 00:22:03,751 --> 00:22:07,167 and all of the noise of the career stuff... 494 00:22:07,250 --> 00:22:08,292 GEORGE: Hey, Brenda. 495 00:22:09,751 --> 00:22:11,000 KELLY: ...there was this really nice 496 00:22:11,083 --> 00:22:12,626 little honeymoon period for them, 497 00:22:12,709 --> 00:22:14,626 where they got to know each other again. 498 00:22:17,125 --> 00:22:18,918 GEORGE: Okay, that's nice. 499 00:22:20,292 --> 00:22:22,042 KELLY: We had survived so much, 500 00:22:22,125 --> 00:22:25,083 and there was this incredible love 501 00:22:25,167 --> 00:22:29,083 and an incredible adventure we'd been through together. 502 00:22:29,167 --> 00:22:30,918 ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 503 00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:34,083 KELLY: And the three of us, 504 00:22:34,167 --> 00:22:35,626 were the only people on the planet 505 00:22:35,709 --> 00:22:37,042 who really fucking got it. 506 00:22:38,626 --> 00:22:43,209 GEORGE: I am very disturbed that my actions in the 1970s 507 00:22:43,292 --> 00:22:45,667 concerning my money and other behaviors 508 00:22:45,751 --> 00:22:46,959 have put me in the position 509 00:22:47,042 --> 00:22:49,042 where I have to be away from Brenda. 510 00:22:49,125 --> 00:22:51,751 That Brenda is left alone so much. 511 00:22:53,125 --> 00:22:55,542 I tell her, I say, "I'm working on our retirement." 512 00:22:55,626 --> 00:22:57,334 I'm trying to set some things in place 513 00:22:57,417 --> 00:22:59,209 "that will put us ahead of this game." 514 00:22:59,292 --> 00:23:01,292 ♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪ 515 00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:10,042 PATTON OSWALT: Comedy is about the present and the now. 516 00:23:10,125 --> 00:23:12,709 And then life changes and you hopefully, 517 00:23:12,792 --> 00:23:15,792 as a comedian, change and evolve with it. 518 00:23:15,876 --> 00:23:18,209 But if you solidify and calcify and go, 519 00:23:18,292 --> 00:23:19,792 "This is as far as I'm going to go 520 00:23:19,876 --> 00:23:21,834 and damn it I'm still going to say these words," 521 00:23:21,918 --> 00:23:23,876 then you're not engaging with the world anymore. 522 00:23:23,959 --> 00:23:25,792 You're engaging with a certain moment in time 523 00:23:25,876 --> 00:23:27,792 that you have decided to live in forever. 524 00:23:27,876 --> 00:23:31,167 And George ran that risk for a while in the '80s 525 00:23:31,250 --> 00:23:32,459 of becoming irrelevant. 526 00:23:33,709 --> 00:23:35,751 KLIPH NESTEROFF: Carlin saw some of the trends 527 00:23:35,834 --> 00:23:37,375 that were happening in stand-up. 528 00:23:37,459 --> 00:23:38,626 Other comedians are coming along, 529 00:23:38,709 --> 00:23:40,459 they're starting to do laps around him. 530 00:23:40,542 --> 00:23:41,834 Comedy clubs are opening up. 531 00:23:41,918 --> 00:23:44,626 He paved the way, but they're not booking him. 532 00:23:44,709 --> 00:23:45,918 He's getting older. 533 00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:47,500 I'm like anybody else on the planet 534 00:23:47,584 --> 00:23:48,667 I'm very moved by world hunger... 535 00:23:48,751 --> 00:23:51,709 KLIPH: Sam Kinison bursts onto the scene 536 00:23:52,918 --> 00:23:54,209 loud and angry. 537 00:23:54,292 --> 00:23:56,375 Yeah, I watch these things on TV and I see those commercials 538 00:23:56,459 --> 00:23:59,167 and I look at it, I go, "God, how cruel," you know. 539 00:23:59,250 --> 00:24:01,042 To see a little kid out there, and I go, "Fuck," 540 00:24:01,125 --> 00:24:03,792 I know the film crew could give this kid a sandwich. 541 00:24:03,876 --> 00:24:05,125 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 542 00:24:05,209 --> 00:24:07,918 PATTON: So, part of Sam Kinison inspired George Carlin, 543 00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:10,125 but part of him scared him a little bit. 544 00:24:10,209 --> 00:24:12,083 But, like any true artist, 545 00:24:12,167 --> 00:24:15,292 if something scares you, you have to run towards it. 546 00:24:15,375 --> 00:24:16,751 There's a director five feet away going, 547 00:24:16,834 --> 00:24:18,792 -"Don't feed him yet!" -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 548 00:24:18,876 --> 00:24:20,167 "Get that sandwich out of here! 549 00:24:20,250 --> 00:24:22,125 It doesn't work unless he looks hungry!" 550 00:24:22,209 --> 00:24:24,042 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 551 00:24:24,125 --> 00:24:25,876 You want to send them something? You want to help? 552 00:24:25,959 --> 00:24:29,083 Send them U-Hauls. Send them U-Hauls, some luggage. 553 00:24:29,167 --> 00:24:30,834 Send them a guy out there that goes, "Hey!" 554 00:24:30,918 --> 00:24:33,417 (CHUCKLES) "You know, we've been driving out here every day with your food 555 00:24:33,500 --> 00:24:36,500 for the last, I don't know, 34 years." 556 00:24:36,584 --> 00:24:38,459 "We've been driving out here every day across the desert 557 00:24:38,542 --> 00:24:40,667 and it occurred to us there wouldn't be world hunger 558 00:24:40,751 --> 00:24:43,125 if you people would live where the food is!" 559 00:24:43,209 --> 00:24:44,334 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 560 00:24:44,417 --> 00:24:47,000 -"Get out of the desert!" -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 561 00:24:47,083 --> 00:24:50,500 "You understand that you live in a fucking desert?" 562 00:24:50,584 --> 00:24:52,167 GEORGE: I remember consciously thinking, 563 00:24:52,250 --> 00:24:56,000 "This motherfucker is good, and he's got ideas." 564 00:24:56,083 --> 00:24:59,834 Without wanting to wipe him out, I want to raise my level 565 00:24:59,918 --> 00:25:02,626 to where I'm not lost in his dust. 566 00:25:02,709 --> 00:25:05,083 I've always been very competitive about this. 567 00:25:05,167 --> 00:25:07,083 And I know that it gave me the feeling 568 00:25:07,167 --> 00:25:09,959 of run a little faster, work a little harder. 569 00:25:10,042 --> 00:25:12,751 You know, it's not accumulated credits here, George. 570 00:25:12,834 --> 00:25:14,751 It's what did you do last week? 571 00:25:14,834 --> 00:25:17,167 ♪ (PIANO MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 572 00:25:17,250 --> 00:25:20,083 (GEORGE VOCALIZING) 573 00:25:20,167 --> 00:25:22,250 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 574 00:25:27,459 --> 00:25:30,876 ♪ Cherry, cherry pie... ♪ 575 00:25:30,959 --> 00:25:34,876 The sanctity of life. Abortion has always been wrong. 576 00:25:34,959 --> 00:25:36,250 It will always be wrong. 577 00:25:36,334 --> 00:25:41,042 GEORGE: And those Reagan years really represented the rise 578 00:25:41,125 --> 00:25:43,292 to supremacy of darkness in a way, 579 00:25:43,375 --> 00:25:45,667 the ascendancy of ignorance. 580 00:25:45,751 --> 00:25:49,292 Rock lyrics have turned from, "I can't get no satisfaction" 581 00:25:49,375 --> 00:25:52,709 to, "I'm going to force you at gunpoint to eat me alive." 582 00:25:52,792 --> 00:25:54,000 (SHOUTING, CHEERING) 583 00:25:54,083 --> 00:25:57,417 GEORGE: So, my reaction to the climate 584 00:25:57,500 --> 00:26:01,125 was one of storing up ammunition. 585 00:26:01,209 --> 00:26:05,459 And the notes began to almost be exclusively about issues. 586 00:26:05,542 --> 00:26:07,751 RUDOLPH GIULIANI: The misuse of federal funds, 587 00:26:07,834 --> 00:26:09,751 the embezzlement of funds, and the stealing... 588 00:26:09,834 --> 00:26:12,709 Shocked by the fact that a former Secretary 589 00:26:12,792 --> 00:26:14,167 of the Treasury of such high standing 590 00:26:14,250 --> 00:26:16,083 had failed to file his tax returns. (SCOFFS) 591 00:26:16,167 --> 00:26:18,375 GEORGE: (SINGING) ♪ Like little Jack Horner ♪ 592 00:26:18,459 --> 00:26:21,375 ♪ Just sittin' in that corner ♪ 593 00:26:21,459 --> 00:26:26,751 ♪ Oh, he was eatin' his cherry Cherry, cherry, cherry pie... ♪ 594 00:26:26,834 --> 00:26:29,042 OLIVER NORTH: Absolutely no recollection 595 00:26:29,125 --> 00:26:31,500 of destroying any document which... 596 00:26:31,584 --> 00:26:33,709 A few months ago, I told the American people 597 00:26:33,792 --> 00:26:35,959 I did not trade arms for hostages. 598 00:26:36,042 --> 00:26:39,500 My heart, to my best intentions, still tell me that's true. 599 00:26:39,584 --> 00:26:41,209 GEORGE: So now, I said, I'm beginning to find 600 00:26:41,292 --> 00:26:45,542 my own way to say these things and to let loose. 601 00:26:46,709 --> 00:26:48,959 My mind wanted now to produce this other stuff. 602 00:26:49,042 --> 00:26:50,375 My mind just called all the shots. 603 00:26:50,459 --> 00:26:53,375 My mind and heart said, "This is what we're doing now." 604 00:26:53,459 --> 00:26:55,500 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 605 00:26:56,375 --> 00:27:01,751 Hello, Union City, New Jersey! 606 00:27:03,584 --> 00:27:05,792 Without any further ado, 607 00:27:05,876 --> 00:27:07,834 it gives me a great deal of pleasure 608 00:27:07,918 --> 00:27:11,959 to introduce a gentleman who needs no introduction. 609 00:27:12,959 --> 00:27:15,751 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 610 00:27:15,834 --> 00:27:18,209 BILL BURR: In 1988, one of the guys I worked with 611 00:27:18,292 --> 00:27:20,876 was into stand-up. And we heard on the radio 612 00:27:20,959 --> 00:27:24,500 that they were advertising George Carlin. 613 00:27:24,584 --> 00:27:26,542 So we ended up going to the show. 614 00:27:26,626 --> 00:27:28,834 We got tickets because we were going to go there 615 00:27:28,918 --> 00:27:30,500 to actually, I can't believe this, 616 00:27:30,959 --> 00:27:32,792 to laugh at him. 617 00:27:32,876 --> 00:27:34,417 That he was this older comic 618 00:27:34,500 --> 00:27:36,792 who is still doing all these old bits that we heard 619 00:27:36,876 --> 00:27:38,667 and I remember the whole week, he just kept going, 620 00:27:38,751 --> 00:27:40,417 "More stuff!" And I kinda bought into it. 621 00:27:40,500 --> 00:27:42,334 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING) -Hey there, we doing all right? 622 00:27:42,417 --> 00:27:44,542 Thank you. Thank you, everybody. 623 00:27:44,626 --> 00:27:46,167 BILL: And George Carlin came out... 624 00:27:46,250 --> 00:27:48,250 Hello. Hiya. Thank you. 625 00:27:48,918 --> 00:27:50,292 ...with like a howitzer. 626 00:27:50,375 --> 00:27:53,083 I really haven't seen this many people in one place 627 00:27:53,167 --> 00:27:54,834 since they took the group photographs 628 00:27:54,918 --> 00:27:56,751 of all the criminals and lawbreakers 629 00:27:56,834 --> 00:27:58,792 in the Ronald Reagan administration. 630 00:27:58,876 --> 00:28:00,876 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -BILL: It was like... 631 00:28:00,959 --> 00:28:03,417 Two-hundred and twenty-five of them so far. 632 00:28:03,500 --> 00:28:04,542 "...Who is this guy?" 633 00:28:04,626 --> 00:28:05,751 See, that's what you got to remember. 634 00:28:05,834 --> 00:28:07,375 This is the Ronald Reagan administration 635 00:28:07,459 --> 00:28:10,959 we're talking about. These are the law-and-order people. 636 00:28:11,042 --> 00:28:13,375 These are the people who are against street crime. 637 00:28:13,459 --> 00:28:15,209 They want to put street criminals in jail 638 00:28:15,292 --> 00:28:17,792 to make life safer for the business criminals. 639 00:28:17,876 --> 00:28:19,375 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 640 00:28:19,459 --> 00:28:21,375 They're against street crime. 641 00:28:21,459 --> 00:28:26,000 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 642 00:28:26,083 --> 00:28:27,584 Keep in mind, these Reagan people 643 00:28:27,667 --> 00:28:30,542 are the ones that were going to get government off our backs. 644 00:28:30,626 --> 00:28:31,918 Remember that? That was the rhetoric 645 00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:33,375 of the 1980 campaign. 646 00:28:33,459 --> 00:28:35,042 We'll get government off your backs 647 00:28:35,125 --> 00:28:37,250 and out of your lives. Yeah, but they still want to 648 00:28:37,334 --> 00:28:38,959 tell you what magazines you can read. 649 00:28:39,042 --> 00:28:40,292 And they still want to tell you 650 00:28:40,375 --> 00:28:41,959 what rock lyrics you can listen to. 651 00:28:42,042 --> 00:28:44,459 And they still want to force your kids to pray in school. 652 00:28:44,542 --> 00:28:47,459 And they still want to tell you what you can say on the radio. 653 00:28:47,542 --> 00:28:50,375 So, these Reagan people, these right wingers, in general, 654 00:28:50,459 --> 00:28:52,209 they're against homosexuality. 655 00:28:52,292 --> 00:28:55,250 They're against pornography. They're against sex education. 656 00:28:55,334 --> 00:28:56,459 They're against abortion. 657 00:28:56,542 --> 00:28:58,250 Yeah, they're going to get government off your back, 658 00:28:58,334 --> 00:29:00,459 but they're going to tell you how to live your sex life. 659 00:29:00,542 --> 00:29:01,459 And let me ask you this, 660 00:29:01,542 --> 00:29:03,292 how would they know anything about it? 661 00:29:03,375 --> 00:29:04,375 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 662 00:29:04,459 --> 00:29:06,626 Have you ever taken a look at those people? 663 00:29:06,709 --> 00:29:07,751 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 664 00:29:07,834 --> 00:29:09,500 No wonder they're afraid of their bodies. 665 00:29:09,584 --> 00:29:11,209 Take a look at them. 666 00:29:11,292 --> 00:29:13,584 Doesn't it strike you as mildly ironic 667 00:29:13,667 --> 00:29:15,542 that most of the people who are against abortion 668 00:29:15,626 --> 00:29:18,542 are people you wouldn't want to fuck in the first place? 669 00:29:18,626 --> 00:29:20,167 Does that strike you a little strange? 670 00:29:20,250 --> 00:29:21,834 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) 671 00:29:26,751 --> 00:29:28,000 Hey, I'm the first one to say 672 00:29:28,083 --> 00:29:32,125 it's a great country, but it's a strange culture. 673 00:29:32,209 --> 00:29:34,584 This is a country where gun store owners 674 00:29:34,667 --> 00:29:36,709 are given a list of stolen credit cards, 675 00:29:36,792 --> 00:29:39,083 but not a list of criminals and maniacs. 676 00:29:39,167 --> 00:29:40,209 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 677 00:29:40,292 --> 00:29:42,709 And now they're thinking about banning toy guns 678 00:29:42,792 --> 00:29:45,292 and they're going to keep the fucking real ones! 679 00:29:45,375 --> 00:29:50,751 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) 680 00:29:54,417 --> 00:29:56,500 BILL: I would say it was like a Miles Davis thing. 681 00:29:57,542 --> 00:30:00,375 George has like, one, two, three, four, 682 00:30:00,459 --> 00:30:04,792 five distinct periods of growth 683 00:30:04,876 --> 00:30:08,375 where he would leave a segment of his audience behind. 684 00:30:08,459 --> 00:30:11,125 Like-- When he was, like, working clean from a team 685 00:30:11,209 --> 00:30:12,792 to then becoming the counterculture guy, 686 00:30:12,876 --> 00:30:14,042 to then being that guy in the '80s, 687 00:30:14,125 --> 00:30:15,959 then that dude in the '90s, and each time, 688 00:30:16,042 --> 00:30:17,125 it was like a boa constrictor. 689 00:30:17,209 --> 00:30:19,000 It just got more pointed and more like, 690 00:30:19,083 --> 00:30:21,000 "Fuck, man. This guy is scaring the shit out of me. 691 00:30:21,083 --> 00:30:22,209 Where's this country going?" 692 00:30:22,292 --> 00:30:26,250 Um, the courage that that takes to do that, 693 00:30:26,334 --> 00:30:28,542 that is like, "Hey, man, I'm going in this direction." 694 00:30:28,626 --> 00:30:30,626 You either come along with me or you don't. 695 00:30:30,709 --> 00:30:32,375 And I don't give a shit if there's 3,000 696 00:30:32,459 --> 00:30:33,792 or three people listening to this. 697 00:30:33,876 --> 00:30:34,918 This is what I believe. 698 00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:36,709 "This is what I want to say and I'm saying it." 699 00:30:36,792 --> 00:30:40,709 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 700 00:30:41,584 --> 00:30:43,417 JERRY: He developed a style 701 00:30:43,500 --> 00:30:45,709 and he started talking about things 702 00:30:45,792 --> 00:30:49,626 that were more serious and more meaningful. 703 00:30:49,709 --> 00:30:53,250 First, he would come out with a hard joke 704 00:30:53,334 --> 00:30:54,375 right in the beginning. 705 00:30:54,459 --> 00:30:56,918 Don't you think it's just a little bit strange 706 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,751 that Ronald Reagan had an operation on his asshole 707 00:30:59,834 --> 00:31:03,209 and George Bush had an operation on his middle finger, huh? 708 00:31:03,292 --> 00:31:04,709 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 709 00:31:04,792 --> 00:31:06,125 He always had something 710 00:31:06,209 --> 00:31:07,709 where he used to call for the audience. 711 00:31:07,792 --> 00:31:09,167 You know, "We're going to blow up America, 712 00:31:09,250 --> 00:31:11,334 but now, here are a few fart jokes." 713 00:31:11,417 --> 00:31:12,542 They were always in there. 714 00:31:12,626 --> 00:31:17,042 Have you ever been in a serious social situation 715 00:31:17,125 --> 00:31:18,626 when you suddenly realize 716 00:31:18,709 --> 00:31:22,042 you have to pull the underwear out of the crack in your ass? 717 00:31:22,125 --> 00:31:26,459 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 718 00:31:28,792 --> 00:31:32,500 "You take this woman to be your lawful wedded wife?" 719 00:31:32,584 --> 00:31:34,959 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 720 00:31:35,042 --> 00:31:40,167 "Huh? Who? Her? Oh, hell yeah." 721 00:31:41,334 --> 00:31:43,626 JERRY: When it got about 20 minutes out, 722 00:31:43,709 --> 00:31:45,918 he had a piece that was a hammer. 723 00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:49,083 And it was what he was really doing the show for. 724 00:31:49,167 --> 00:31:51,042 Sanctity of life. You believe in it? 725 00:31:51,125 --> 00:31:53,417 Personally, I think it's a bunch of shit. 726 00:31:53,500 --> 00:31:54,584 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 727 00:31:54,667 --> 00:31:57,834 Well, I mean, life is sacred? Who said so? God? 728 00:31:57,918 --> 00:31:59,626 Hey, if you read history, you realize that 729 00:31:59,709 --> 00:32:02,125 God is one of the leading causes of death. 730 00:32:02,209 --> 00:32:03,667 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 731 00:32:03,751 --> 00:32:06,417 Has been for thousands of years. 732 00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:08,751 Hindus, Muslims, Jews, Christians, 733 00:32:08,834 --> 00:32:10,334 all taking turns killing each other 734 00:32:10,417 --> 00:32:12,500 because God told them it was a good idea. 735 00:32:12,584 --> 00:32:13,709 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 736 00:32:13,792 --> 00:32:16,083 "The sword of God, the blood of the lamb, 737 00:32:16,167 --> 00:32:19,083 vengeance is mine." Millions of dead motherfuckers. 738 00:32:19,167 --> 00:32:21,083 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -Millions of dead motherfuckers 739 00:32:21,167 --> 00:32:22,667 all because they gave the wrong answer 740 00:32:22,751 --> 00:32:24,918 to the God question. 741 00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:28,125 "You believe in God?" "No." (BLOWS) Dead. 742 00:32:28,209 --> 00:32:29,375 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 743 00:32:29,459 --> 00:32:31,209 "You believe in God?" "Yes." 744 00:32:31,292 --> 00:32:34,292 "You believe in my God?" "No." (BLOWS) Dead. 745 00:32:34,375 --> 00:32:37,083 "My God has a bigger dick than your God." 746 00:32:37,167 --> 00:32:38,083 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 747 00:32:38,167 --> 00:32:40,709 We watched the arc of a creative person 748 00:32:40,792 --> 00:32:42,542 that just stayed with it 749 00:32:42,626 --> 00:32:43,667 until they broke through 750 00:32:43,751 --> 00:32:46,667 to that next evolution that he went through, 751 00:32:46,751 --> 00:32:48,709 because it felt like, "Yes, I'm a--" 752 00:32:48,792 --> 00:32:50,626 "You know me as this goofy guy 753 00:32:50,709 --> 00:32:52,375 that is a wonderful wordsmith 754 00:32:52,459 --> 00:32:56,000 and I can always find ways to say things, and I'm now, 755 00:32:56,083 --> 00:33:00,375 I have been pushed to the point, by what I have seen in my years, 756 00:33:00,459 --> 00:33:02,542 where none of that is there anymore, 757 00:33:02,626 --> 00:33:06,459 "and I need to tell you exactly what is going on." 758 00:33:06,542 --> 00:33:08,375 We can't get rid of this war mentality 759 00:33:08,459 --> 00:33:11,000 from our public life. We got a war on poverty, 760 00:33:11,083 --> 00:33:15,375 war on crime, war on cancer, war on litter, war on drugs. 761 00:33:15,459 --> 00:33:16,667 Did you ever notice we don't have 762 00:33:16,751 --> 00:33:18,083 a war on homelessness? 763 00:33:18,167 --> 00:33:20,250 No war on homelessness. You know why? 764 00:33:20,334 --> 00:33:22,542 -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) -You know why? 765 00:33:22,626 --> 00:33:25,125 I'll tell you why, because there's no money in it. 766 00:33:25,209 --> 00:33:26,918 There's no money in that problem. 767 00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:29,209 Nobody stands to get rich off of that problem. 768 00:33:29,292 --> 00:33:30,584 You find a solution to homelessness 769 00:33:30,667 --> 00:33:32,083 where the businessmen and the politicians 770 00:33:32,167 --> 00:33:34,125 can steal a couple of million dollars each, 771 00:33:34,209 --> 00:33:35,375 you'll see the streets of America 772 00:33:35,459 --> 00:33:36,918 begin to clear up pretty fast. 773 00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:39,083 It seemed he had another goal in mind, 774 00:33:39,167 --> 00:33:41,292 which was to push your thinking. 775 00:33:41,375 --> 00:33:44,375 These people need physical, tangible structures, 776 00:33:44,459 --> 00:33:46,834 low-cost housing. But where are you going to put it? 777 00:33:46,918 --> 00:33:48,667 I think that was the biggest thing 778 00:33:48,751 --> 00:33:51,209 that attracted me to him, especially young, 779 00:33:51,292 --> 00:33:52,584 because your critical thinking 780 00:33:52,667 --> 00:33:54,959 is starting to really, like, tick up a bunch. 781 00:33:55,042 --> 00:33:56,334 And you're starting to really be like, 782 00:33:56,417 --> 00:33:58,083 "Why do I have to take off my hat in class? 783 00:33:58,167 --> 00:33:59,626 What's that have to do with me learning? 784 00:33:59,709 --> 00:34:01,125 It's not blocking my brain." 785 00:34:01,209 --> 00:34:03,000 We got a thing in this country called NIMBY. 786 00:34:03,083 --> 00:34:05,792 N-I-M-B-Y, "Not In My Backyard." 787 00:34:05,876 --> 00:34:07,459 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -That's what they call it. 788 00:34:07,542 --> 00:34:09,167 People don't want anything near them, 789 00:34:09,250 --> 00:34:11,125 especially if it might help somebody else. 790 00:34:11,209 --> 00:34:12,375 To then be introduced 791 00:34:12,459 --> 00:34:14,667 to another, like, critical thinker who's like, 792 00:34:14,751 --> 00:34:16,918 "Hey, society, what's up with these rules?" 793 00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,500 "What's up with these standards? What's up with trying to 794 00:34:19,584 --> 00:34:21,626 inflict this stuff on everybody?" 795 00:34:21,709 --> 00:34:23,292 Once you hear another perspective, 796 00:34:23,375 --> 00:34:24,500 you can't unhear it, 797 00:34:24,584 --> 00:34:27,584 so you do have to then decide who you are after that. 798 00:34:27,667 --> 00:34:29,083 It's just the facts. 799 00:34:29,167 --> 00:34:31,792 Well, I got an idea where we can put some low-cost housing, 800 00:34:31,876 --> 00:34:32,918 golf courses. 801 00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:35,626 This is just what we need. Golf courses. 802 00:34:35,709 --> 00:34:38,918 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) -Plenty of good land. 803 00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:40,959 Plenty of good land in nice neighborhoods, 804 00:34:41,042 --> 00:34:42,709 land that's devoted now to a meaningless, 805 00:34:42,792 --> 00:34:45,000 mindless activity engaged in primarily 806 00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:46,918 by White well-to-do male businessmen 807 00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:48,626 who use the game to make deals to get together 808 00:34:48,709 --> 00:34:50,959 to carve the country up a little finer among themselves. 809 00:34:51,042 --> 00:34:53,292 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -Golf is an arrogant-- 810 00:34:53,375 --> 00:34:56,000 an arrogant, elitist game 811 00:34:56,083 --> 00:34:59,000 and it takes up entirely too much room in this country. 812 00:34:59,083 --> 00:35:01,125 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) -Entirely too much room. 813 00:35:01,209 --> 00:35:04,083 Listen to me. You know much room it takes up? 814 00:35:04,167 --> 00:35:07,042 Seventeen thousand golf courses, about 150 acres each. 815 00:35:07,125 --> 00:35:10,167 That's three million acres. That's 4,800 square miles. 816 00:35:10,250 --> 00:35:12,584 Two Rhode Islands and a Delaware you could build for the homeless 817 00:35:12,667 --> 00:35:14,000 on the land that's currently devoted 818 00:35:14,083 --> 00:35:17,417 to this meaningless, mindless, arrogant, elitist, racist game. 819 00:35:17,500 --> 00:35:20,667 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) -Racist game, racist game. 820 00:35:21,542 --> 00:35:22,959 ♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 821 00:35:23,042 --> 00:35:25,083 GEORGE: The reason I believe in blunt, 822 00:35:25,167 --> 00:35:29,542 almost violent presentation of my ideas these days, 823 00:35:29,626 --> 00:35:33,292 is because what is happening to everyone... 824 00:35:33,375 --> 00:35:35,667 it is not gentle, it is not subtle. 825 00:35:35,751 --> 00:35:38,834 It is direct, hard, and violent 826 00:35:38,918 --> 00:35:40,834 what is being done to the lives of people. 827 00:35:40,918 --> 00:35:45,584 The real violence goes on every day unheard, unreported, 828 00:35:45,667 --> 00:35:50,542 and it is not sufficient to have a clever riposte, 829 00:35:50,626 --> 00:35:52,250 a clever line, huh? 830 00:35:52,334 --> 00:35:55,334 "Fuck you, cocksuckers," is my approach. 831 00:35:55,417 --> 00:35:57,792 The bloodiest, most brutal wars fought, 832 00:35:57,876 --> 00:36:01,125 all based on religious hatred, which is fine with me. 833 00:36:01,209 --> 00:36:03,834 Any time a bunch of Holy people wanna kill each other... 834 00:36:03,918 --> 00:36:06,083 ♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪ 835 00:36:26,834 --> 00:36:28,459 GEORGE: One of the problems of Americans 836 00:36:28,542 --> 00:36:30,500 is they can't face reality. 837 00:36:30,584 --> 00:36:32,250 And that's why when it comes crashing down, 838 00:36:32,334 --> 00:36:34,667 no one's going to be prepared to handle it, 839 00:36:34,751 --> 00:36:36,167 because they're not used to it anymore. 840 00:36:36,250 --> 00:36:37,542 I mean, everything is glossed over. 841 00:36:37,626 --> 00:36:39,375 "Oh, that's not happening." Feel-good presidents. 842 00:36:39,459 --> 00:36:40,876 "That's not happening. That's not happening. 843 00:36:40,959 --> 00:36:42,709 Let's make believe this isn't happening." 844 00:36:42,792 --> 00:36:44,834 And suddenly, we're going to have to face it. 845 00:36:50,584 --> 00:36:51,751 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ 846 00:36:51,834 --> 00:36:55,459 I remember one time Carlin said to me... 847 00:36:55,542 --> 00:36:58,042 "I'm not in show business. I'm a comedian." 848 00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:00,834 It's like, "Oh, this is gangster." 849 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:06,083 I took it to mean that comedians, 850 00:37:06,876 --> 00:37:08,626 you know, we're thinkers, 851 00:37:08,709 --> 00:37:12,292 but when you think about, you know, the history of man, 852 00:37:12,375 --> 00:37:15,000 you know, man used to love philosophers. 853 00:37:15,083 --> 00:37:17,209 We don't really have philosophers anymore, 854 00:37:17,292 --> 00:37:18,918 but we have comedians. 855 00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:22,042 So, Carlin encompassed all those things. 856 00:37:22,125 --> 00:37:23,918 That's what he meant. 857 00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:27,834 Like, "This is what we do. This is the life we've chosen." 858 00:37:27,918 --> 00:37:31,584 We're, you know, kind of a secret society, in a sense. 859 00:37:31,667 --> 00:37:35,000 I think... I was talking to Seinfeld last night 860 00:37:35,083 --> 00:37:37,709 and it's kind of like the same thing. 861 00:37:38,459 --> 00:37:41,667 Okay, fine. Fine. 862 00:37:41,751 --> 00:37:46,876 You want the comedian to be your lens on society? 863 00:37:46,959 --> 00:37:49,959 Go. Enjoy it. But for me... 864 00:37:51,918 --> 00:37:53,000 I've never heard a comic bit 865 00:37:53,083 --> 00:37:55,334 that changed my opinion on anything. 866 00:37:55,417 --> 00:37:59,292 Except a great bit changes my opinion of that comedian. 867 00:37:59,375 --> 00:38:01,167 ♪ (MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 868 00:38:03,125 --> 00:38:05,626 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 869 00:38:08,459 --> 00:38:10,751 Hey, look out there. It's these meaty guys. 870 00:38:10,834 --> 00:38:12,125 Wayne! How ya doing, Wayne? 871 00:38:13,709 --> 00:38:14,751 People sometimes say to me, 872 00:38:14,834 --> 00:38:16,584 "Are you trying to make people think?" 873 00:38:16,667 --> 00:38:20,459 "I say, "No, no. That would be the kiss of death. 874 00:38:20,542 --> 00:38:23,209 What I want to do is to let them know I'm thinking." 875 00:38:25,125 --> 00:38:27,000 You have to be somewhat of an egotist 876 00:38:27,083 --> 00:38:28,542 to stand up all your life and say, 877 00:38:28,626 --> 00:38:30,459 "Listen to me. Please pay attention." 878 00:38:30,542 --> 00:38:33,042 And that's fine. I can live with that about myself. 879 00:38:33,125 --> 00:38:35,709 But if I'm going to call attention to myself, 880 00:38:35,792 --> 00:38:37,167 I want to show them something 881 00:38:37,250 --> 00:38:38,500 a little different from time to time. 882 00:38:38,584 --> 00:38:42,667 I want to find a voice that isn't like all the others. 883 00:38:42,751 --> 00:38:45,792 So I like to find out where their line may be 884 00:38:45,876 --> 00:38:48,209 and deliberately cross it, 885 00:38:48,292 --> 00:38:50,000 and then make them glad they came. 886 00:38:50,083 --> 00:38:52,083 Iraq, Panama, Grenada, Libya, 887 00:38:52,167 --> 00:38:53,751 you got some Brown people in your country. 888 00:38:53,834 --> 00:38:58,083 Tell them to watch the fuck out or we'll goddamn bomb them. 889 00:38:58,167 --> 00:39:00,918 (IMITATES EXPLOSIONS) 890 00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:02,459 That's-- If they're laughing 891 00:39:02,542 --> 00:39:04,709 or at some point when they extend the laugh, 892 00:39:04,792 --> 00:39:06,751 or they begin to applaud one of those lines, 893 00:39:06,834 --> 00:39:08,667 I'll be filling that time 894 00:39:08,751 --> 00:39:09,918 by going... (IMITATES EXPLOSIONS) 895 00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:11,626 HOST: If you were a new comic today, 896 00:39:11,709 --> 00:39:13,959 if you came along right as you are right now, 897 00:39:14,042 --> 00:39:16,667 you had never made a record, no one had ever heard of you. 898 00:39:16,751 --> 00:39:18,751 GEORGE: I'd kill. I'd absolutely kill. 899 00:39:18,834 --> 00:39:21,542 I'm doing my very best work right now. 900 00:39:21,626 --> 00:39:24,500 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING) -Yeah. Okay. 901 00:39:25,417 --> 00:39:27,000 It's been a little while. 902 00:39:27,083 --> 00:39:28,709 It's been a little while since I've been here, 903 00:39:28,792 --> 00:39:30,500 and a couple of things have happened in that time. 904 00:39:30,584 --> 00:39:32,751 I'd like to talk a little bit about the war 905 00:39:32,834 --> 00:39:35,167 -in the Persian Gulf. -(AUDIENCE CHEERING) 906 00:39:35,250 --> 00:39:37,667 Big doings in the Persian Gulf. 907 00:39:37,751 --> 00:39:39,292 You know my favorite part of that war? 908 00:39:39,375 --> 00:39:40,667 It's the first war we ever had 909 00:39:40,751 --> 00:39:43,083 that was on every channel plus cable. 910 00:39:43,167 --> 00:39:44,375 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 911 00:39:44,459 --> 00:39:46,959 And the war got good ratings too, didn't it? 912 00:39:47,042 --> 00:39:50,250 Got good ratings. Well, we like war. 913 00:39:50,334 --> 00:39:53,459 We like war. We're a war-like people. 914 00:39:53,542 --> 00:39:55,751 We like war because we're good at it, 915 00:39:55,834 --> 00:39:56,959 and it's a good thing we are. 916 00:39:57,042 --> 00:39:59,292 We're not very good at anything else anymore. 917 00:39:59,375 --> 00:40:02,250 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -Huh? Can't build a decent car. 918 00:40:02,334 --> 00:40:05,500 Can't make a TV set or a VCR worth a fuck. 919 00:40:05,584 --> 00:40:06,834 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 920 00:40:06,918 --> 00:40:09,292 Got no steel industry left. Can't educate our young people. 921 00:40:09,375 --> 00:40:11,167 Can't get healthcare to our old people, 922 00:40:11,250 --> 00:40:14,334 but we can bomb the shit out of your country, all right. 923 00:40:14,417 --> 00:40:15,792 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) 924 00:40:15,876 --> 00:40:18,876 We can bomb the shit out of your country, all right. 925 00:40:18,959 --> 00:40:22,000 -(CHEERING) -(GEORGE IMITATING EXPLOSIONS) 926 00:40:22,083 --> 00:40:26,125 Especially, if your country is full of Brown people. 927 00:40:26,209 --> 00:40:27,292 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 928 00:40:27,375 --> 00:40:30,375 Oh, we like that, don't we? That's our hobby. 929 00:40:30,459 --> 00:40:34,000 That's our new job in the world, bombing Brown people. 930 00:40:35,042 --> 00:40:36,959 Iraq, Panama, Grenada, Libya, 931 00:40:37,042 --> 00:40:38,626 you got some Brown people in your country. 932 00:40:38,709 --> 00:40:40,667 Tell them to watch the fuck out... 933 00:40:40,751 --> 00:40:44,626 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -...or we'll goddamn bomb them. 934 00:40:44,709 --> 00:40:46,125 Well, when's the last White people 935 00:40:46,209 --> 00:40:47,292 you can remember that we bombed? 936 00:40:47,375 --> 00:40:48,667 Can you remember the last White... 937 00:40:48,751 --> 00:40:50,542 Can you remember any White people 938 00:40:50,626 --> 00:40:51,584 we've ever bombed? 939 00:40:51,667 --> 00:40:53,292 The Germans, those are the only ones, 940 00:40:53,375 --> 00:40:54,709 and that's only because they were trying to 941 00:40:54,792 --> 00:40:57,417 -cut in on our action. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 942 00:40:57,500 --> 00:40:59,417 They wanted to dominate the world. 943 00:40:59,500 --> 00:41:02,417 Bullshit, that's our fucking job. 944 00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:05,083 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) -That's our fucking job! 945 00:41:05,667 --> 00:41:08,292 (IMITATES EXPLOSIONS) 946 00:41:11,042 --> 00:41:12,292 Well, you know, Jammin' In New York, 947 00:41:12,375 --> 00:41:14,918 he always-- When he talked about Jammin' In New York, 948 00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:18,334 he said the reason that it was so profound for him 949 00:41:18,417 --> 00:41:19,542 was that it was the first time 950 00:41:19,626 --> 00:41:21,250 that he felt like he was a real writer. 951 00:41:21,334 --> 00:41:24,250 That show was a life changer for me in 1992. 952 00:41:24,334 --> 00:41:28,167 It made me realize I was more of an artist than a performer. 953 00:41:28,250 --> 00:41:30,250 You know, for another comedian to hear that, 954 00:41:30,334 --> 00:41:33,125 it's like, "Wow. Okay, sure. 955 00:41:33,209 --> 00:41:36,167 Whatever you say, you weren't a real writer until then. Okay." 956 00:41:36,250 --> 00:41:38,417 I'm a stand-up comic. It's a vulgar art. 957 00:41:38,500 --> 00:41:40,334 It's the people's art. I'll always be that. 958 00:41:40,417 --> 00:41:43,751 I'm nothing but a vulgar, stand-up comedian performer, 959 00:41:43,834 --> 00:41:44,959 show business guy, 960 00:41:45,042 --> 00:41:46,918 but I'm a writer, too. 961 00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:48,751 There's an artist at work in here. 962 00:41:48,834 --> 00:41:51,209 There's an artist at work alongside the performer, 963 00:41:51,292 --> 00:41:52,918 and that made me feel different. 964 00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:54,918 Jammin' In New York was the first time 965 00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:57,834 that those values showed in the piece called, 966 00:41:57,918 --> 00:42:00,125 The Planet is Fine. The People Are Fucked. 967 00:42:00,209 --> 00:42:03,250 We're so self-important. So self-important. 968 00:42:03,334 --> 00:42:06,500 Everybody's gotta save something now. Save the trees. 969 00:42:06,584 --> 00:42:10,334 Save the bees. Save the whales. Save those snails. 970 00:42:10,417 --> 00:42:11,626 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 971 00:42:11,709 --> 00:42:15,250 And the greatest arrogance of all, save the planet. What? 972 00:42:15,334 --> 00:42:18,876 Are these fucking people kidding me? Save the planet? 973 00:42:18,959 --> 00:42:21,209 We don't even know how to take care of ourselves yet. 974 00:42:21,292 --> 00:42:23,250 We haven't learned how to care for one another. 975 00:42:23,334 --> 00:42:25,459 We're going to save the fucking planet? 976 00:42:25,542 --> 00:42:28,459 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) -I'm getting tired of that shit. 977 00:42:28,542 --> 00:42:35,125 Tired of that shit, tired. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day. 978 00:42:35,209 --> 00:42:36,083 I'm tired of these 979 00:42:36,167 --> 00:42:38,292 self- righteous environmentalists. 980 00:42:38,375 --> 00:42:40,500 These White bourgeois liberals 981 00:42:40,584 --> 00:42:42,250 who think the only thing wrong with this country 982 00:42:42,334 --> 00:42:44,876 is there aren't enough bicycle paths. 983 00:42:44,959 --> 00:42:48,083 People trying to make the world safe for their Volvos. 984 00:42:48,167 --> 00:42:49,918 Besides, environmentalists 985 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:51,667 don't give a shit about the planet. 986 00:42:51,751 --> 00:42:53,417 They don't care about the planet. 987 00:42:53,500 --> 00:42:56,584 Not in the abstract, they don't. Not in the abstract, they don't. 988 00:42:56,667 --> 00:42:57,918 You know what they're interested in? 989 00:42:58,000 --> 00:43:01,751 A clean place to live. Their own habitat. 990 00:43:01,834 --> 00:43:03,375 They're worried that someday in the future, 991 00:43:03,459 --> 00:43:05,918 they might be personally inconvenienced. 992 00:43:06,042 --> 00:43:08,334 Narrow, unenlightened self-interest 993 00:43:08,417 --> 00:43:09,459 doesn't impress me. 994 00:43:09,542 --> 00:43:12,584 Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. 995 00:43:12,667 --> 00:43:15,709 Nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine. 996 00:43:15,792 --> 00:43:18,584 -The people are fucked. -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 997 00:43:18,667 --> 00:43:22,792 Difference. Difference. The planet is fine. 998 00:43:22,876 --> 00:43:26,125 Compared to the people, the planet is doing great. 999 00:43:26,209 --> 00:43:27,959 It's been here four and a half billion years. 1000 00:43:28,042 --> 00:43:29,375 Do you ever think about the arithmetic? 1001 00:43:29,459 --> 00:43:32,334 The planet has been here four and a half billion years. 1002 00:43:32,417 --> 00:43:36,626 We've been here what, 100,000? Maybe 200,000, 1003 00:43:36,709 --> 00:43:38,584 and we've only been engaged in heavy industry 1004 00:43:38,667 --> 00:43:40,375 for a little over 200 years. 1005 00:43:40,459 --> 00:43:43,459 Two hundred years versus four and a half billion, 1006 00:43:43,542 --> 00:43:47,334 and we have the conceit to think that somehow we're a threat. 1007 00:43:47,417 --> 00:43:49,125 That somehow we're going to put in jeopardy 1008 00:43:49,209 --> 00:43:51,209 this beautiful little blue-green ball 1009 00:43:51,292 --> 00:43:53,375 that's just a-floating around the sun. 1010 00:43:53,459 --> 00:43:56,250 The planet has been through a lot worse than us. 1011 00:43:56,334 --> 00:43:59,209 Been through all kinds of things worse than us. 1012 00:43:59,292 --> 00:44:02,167 Been through earthquakes, volcanoes, plate tectonics, 1013 00:44:02,250 --> 00:44:05,334 continental drift, solar flares, sunspots, magnetic storms, 1014 00:44:05,417 --> 00:44:07,375 the magnetic reversal of the poles. 1015 00:44:07,459 --> 00:44:10,250 Hundreds of thousands of years of bombardment by comets 1016 00:44:10,334 --> 00:44:13,542 and asteroids and meteors, worldwide floods, tidal waves, 1017 00:44:13,626 --> 00:44:15,918 worldwide fires, erosion, cosmic rays, 1018 00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:20,209 recurring ice ages and we think some plastic bags... 1019 00:44:20,292 --> 00:44:21,500 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) 1020 00:44:21,584 --> 00:44:25,667 ...and some aluminum cans are going to make a difference? 1021 00:44:25,751 --> 00:44:30,167 -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) -The planet... the planet... 1022 00:44:33,250 --> 00:44:37,918 the planet isn't going anywhere. We are. 1023 00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:38,918 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1024 00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:42,584 We're going away. Pack your shit, folks. 1025 00:44:42,667 --> 00:44:45,292 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -We're going away 1026 00:44:45,375 --> 00:44:47,250 and we won't leave much of a trace either. 1027 00:44:47,334 --> 00:44:51,125 Thank God for that. Maybe a little Styrofoam, maybe. 1028 00:44:51,209 --> 00:44:53,626 A little Styrofoam. Planet will be here. 1029 00:44:53,709 --> 00:44:57,042 We'll be long gone. Just another failed mutation. 1030 00:44:57,125 --> 00:44:59,709 Just another closed-end biological mistake, 1031 00:44:59,792 --> 00:45:01,542 an evolutionary cul-de-sac. 1032 00:45:01,626 --> 00:45:05,500 The planet will shake us off like a bad case of fleas. 1033 00:45:06,292 --> 00:45:09,083 A surface nuisance. 1034 00:45:09,167 --> 00:45:11,834 -(BLOWS) -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1035 00:45:11,918 --> 00:45:14,292 That haunting sound effect 1036 00:45:14,375 --> 00:45:16,584 of the Earth just shaking us off, he goes... 1037 00:45:16,667 --> 00:45:19,709 (BLOWS) And I remember I-- I-- like-- 1038 00:45:19,792 --> 00:45:21,792 I felt like a jolt in my chest, 1039 00:45:21,876 --> 00:45:23,918 you know, when you lean back on a chair or something, 1040 00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:25,000 when he did that, 1041 00:45:25,083 --> 00:45:29,417 of the way he so brutally and eloquently 1042 00:45:29,500 --> 00:45:31,334 showed the insignificance 1043 00:45:32,209 --> 00:45:33,709 of human beings and humanity. 1044 00:45:33,792 --> 00:45:37,292 To be fair, the planet probably sees us as a mild threat. 1045 00:45:37,375 --> 00:45:38,667 Something to be dealt with, 1046 00:45:38,751 --> 00:45:40,751 and I'm sure the planet will defend itself... 1047 00:45:40,834 --> 00:45:42,751 BILL: A lot of the stuff that he was saying, 1048 00:45:42,834 --> 00:45:45,125 it was hard for some people to listen to it, 1049 00:45:45,209 --> 00:45:47,709 because it was so searingly and brutally honest. 1050 00:45:47,792 --> 00:45:49,626 What would you do if you were the planet 1051 00:45:49,709 --> 00:45:51,626 trying to defend against this pesky, 1052 00:45:51,709 --> 00:45:55,959 troublesome species? "Let's see. What might... Hmm, Viruses." 1053 00:45:56,042 --> 00:45:57,042 Viruses might be good. 1054 00:45:57,125 --> 00:45:59,542 They seem vulnerable to viruses. 1055 00:45:59,626 --> 00:46:02,209 And viruses are tricky, always mutating 1056 00:46:02,292 --> 00:46:03,292 and forming new strains, 1057 00:46:03,375 --> 00:46:05,250 "whenever a vaccine is developed." 1058 00:46:05,334 --> 00:46:07,334 The thing that is so key with George 1059 00:46:07,417 --> 00:46:09,375 is he's not afraid of silence. And so I think 1060 00:46:09,459 --> 00:46:11,375 when your comedian has a specific agenda, 1061 00:46:11,459 --> 00:46:14,209 especially one that is so explicitly political, 1062 00:46:14,292 --> 00:46:15,500 and so explicitly, like, 1063 00:46:15,584 --> 00:46:17,083 "I'm going to confront the things 1064 00:46:17,167 --> 00:46:19,459 that you think you don't want me to confront," 1065 00:46:19,542 --> 00:46:22,167 you have to be able to keep your back stiff. 1066 00:46:22,250 --> 00:46:24,626 Because if the audience sees you back off, 1067 00:46:24,709 --> 00:46:25,792 then they got you. 1068 00:46:25,876 --> 00:46:29,292 Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with a fetus 1069 00:46:29,375 --> 00:46:31,292 from conception to nine months. 1070 00:46:31,375 --> 00:46:33,375 After that, they don't want to know about you. 1071 00:46:33,459 --> 00:46:35,626 They don't want to hear from you. No nothing. 1072 00:46:35,709 --> 00:46:37,751 No neonatal care, no daycare, no Head Start, 1073 00:46:37,834 --> 00:46:40,584 no school lunch, no food stamps, no welfare, no nothing. 1074 00:46:40,667 --> 00:46:44,209 If you're preborn, you're fine. If you're preschool, 1075 00:46:44,292 --> 00:46:46,042 -you're fucked. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) 1076 00:46:46,125 --> 00:46:50,751 -You're fucked. -(LAUGHING, CHEERING) 1077 00:46:52,792 --> 00:46:55,209 Conservatives don't give a shit about you 1078 00:46:55,292 --> 00:46:57,959 until you reach military age. 1079 00:46:58,959 --> 00:47:01,167 Then they think you are just fine. 1080 00:47:01,250 --> 00:47:02,834 Just what they've been looking for. 1081 00:47:02,918 --> 00:47:04,834 Conservatives want live babies 1082 00:47:04,918 --> 00:47:08,375 so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. 1083 00:47:08,459 --> 00:47:11,667 Pro-life, they're not pro-life. You know what they are? 1084 00:47:11,751 --> 00:47:14,334 They're anti-woman. Simple as it gets, 1085 00:47:14,417 --> 00:47:16,667 anti-woman. They don't like them. 1086 00:47:16,751 --> 00:47:19,918 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 1087 00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:21,292 Here's another question I have. 1088 00:47:21,375 --> 00:47:23,709 How come when it's us, it's an abortion, 1089 00:47:23,792 --> 00:47:25,792 and when it's a chicken, it's an omelet? 1090 00:47:33,500 --> 00:47:36,918 Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? 1091 00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:39,876 Name six ways we're better than chickens. 1092 00:47:39,959 --> 00:47:42,083 See, nobody can do it. 1093 00:47:42,167 --> 00:47:45,626 You know why? Because chickens are decent people. 1094 00:47:47,209 --> 00:47:48,876 Is a fetus a human being? 1095 00:47:48,959 --> 00:47:51,000 This seems to be the central question. 1096 00:47:51,083 --> 00:47:52,584 Well, if a fetus is a human being, 1097 00:47:52,667 --> 00:47:55,083 how come the census doesn't count them? 1098 00:47:55,167 --> 00:47:57,250 Just looking for a little consistency here 1099 00:47:57,334 --> 00:47:59,292 in these anti-abortion arguments... 1100 00:47:59,375 --> 00:48:01,751 No one is ever more himself 1101 00:48:01,834 --> 00:48:04,709 than at that moment when he laughs 1102 00:48:04,792 --> 00:48:08,000 because it's very Zen-like, that moment. 1103 00:48:08,083 --> 00:48:09,584 You are completely yourself 1104 00:48:09,667 --> 00:48:13,834 when the message hits that brain and you understand it 1105 00:48:13,918 --> 00:48:15,959 and then the laugh begins. 1106 00:48:16,042 --> 00:48:18,709 If a new idea slips into that moment, 1107 00:48:18,792 --> 00:48:23,167 it gets in and has a place to start to grow a little. 1108 00:48:24,667 --> 00:48:25,751 At the same time, 1109 00:48:25,834 --> 00:48:28,500 you've had to surrender yourself to that moment, 1110 00:48:28,584 --> 00:48:29,959 and it's a perfect union. 1111 00:48:31,167 --> 00:48:34,626 It's a genuine, momentary communion. 1112 00:48:34,709 --> 00:48:37,584 They wouldn't have experienced it without you, 1113 00:48:37,667 --> 00:48:39,876 and you wouldn't have experienced it without them. 1114 00:48:41,584 --> 00:48:43,083 Maybe it's one of the things 1115 00:48:43,167 --> 00:48:46,250 that you seek by following this path 1116 00:48:46,334 --> 00:48:50,292 is to have some power like that. To be able to say, 1117 00:48:50,375 --> 00:48:53,959 "Stop in your tracks and consider me." 1118 00:48:54,042 --> 00:48:55,459 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 1119 00:48:55,542 --> 00:48:57,250 I'm speaking to my friends, the Catholics, 1120 00:48:57,334 --> 00:48:59,250 when John Cardinal O'Connor of New York 1121 00:48:59,334 --> 00:49:00,500 and some of these other cardinals 1122 00:49:00,584 --> 00:49:02,626 and bishops have experienced their first pregnancies 1123 00:49:02,709 --> 00:49:03,959 and their first labor pains 1124 00:49:04,042 --> 00:49:05,918 and they've raised a couple of children on minimum wage, 1125 00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:07,042 then I'll be glad to hear 1126 00:49:07,125 --> 00:49:08,792 what they have to say about abortion. 1127 00:49:08,876 --> 00:49:10,751 -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) -I'm sure it'll be interesting. 1128 00:49:10,834 --> 00:49:15,083 Enlightening, too. But... but... 1129 00:49:18,417 --> 00:49:20,292 in the meantime, what they ought to be doing 1130 00:49:20,375 --> 00:49:22,626 is telling these priests who took a vow of chastity 1131 00:49:22,709 --> 00:49:25,042 to keep their hands off the altar boys. 1132 00:49:25,125 --> 00:49:26,125 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1133 00:49:26,209 --> 00:49:28,417 When Jesus said, "Suffer the little children, 1134 00:49:28,500 --> 00:49:31,459 "come unto me," that's not what He was talking about. 1135 00:49:31,542 --> 00:49:34,167 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1136 00:49:36,292 --> 00:49:39,000 This will be the best fair ever! 1137 00:49:39,083 --> 00:49:42,626 -Mr. Conductor? -Look what I won at the fair! 1138 00:49:42,709 --> 00:49:44,542 Besides winning all these prizes, 1139 00:49:44,626 --> 00:49:46,667 I had a whole baked bean. 1140 00:49:46,751 --> 00:49:48,167 HASAN MINHAJ: Like most kids, 1141 00:49:48,250 --> 00:49:52,167 my introduction to comedy was my freshman year of college. 1142 00:49:52,250 --> 00:49:54,417 I was one of those kids where I only knew Carlin 1143 00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:56,792 as the dude from Shining Time Station. 1144 00:49:56,876 --> 00:49:58,918 Honestly, he was just the dude 1145 00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:00,667 from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. 1146 00:50:00,751 --> 00:50:03,500 Greetings, my excellent friends. 1147 00:50:03,584 --> 00:50:06,542 ALEX WINTER: The Rufus that you see 1148 00:50:06,626 --> 00:50:09,292 is the Carlin that we knew off-camera. 1149 00:50:09,375 --> 00:50:12,751 Right, it was this gentle, paternal... 1150 00:50:12,834 --> 00:50:15,209 It wasn't like, "Hey, now I'm doing my thing." You know. 1151 00:50:15,292 --> 00:50:17,167 And I think everyone expected that. 1152 00:50:17,250 --> 00:50:18,584 Like, no one complained about this. 1153 00:50:18,667 --> 00:50:20,292 I'm not like going to create some mythology. 1154 00:50:20,375 --> 00:50:22,918 I'm only telling you what the set vibe was. 1155 00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:24,584 And that was what the set vibe was. 1156 00:50:24,667 --> 00:50:26,751 ♪ (MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1157 00:50:26,834 --> 00:50:29,500 ALEX: One of the things I respected about him so much, 1158 00:50:29,584 --> 00:50:30,709 and I think one of the things 1159 00:50:30,792 --> 00:50:33,626 that drew me to him when I was young, 1160 00:50:33,709 --> 00:50:36,125 there was a kind of open-heartedness to him. 1161 00:50:36,209 --> 00:50:38,083 -Gentlemen... -ALEX: And front and center 1162 00:50:38,167 --> 00:50:40,500 -were his values. -...we're history. 1163 00:50:40,584 --> 00:50:42,083 Whoa! 1164 00:50:42,792 --> 00:50:44,209 Hi, Tom. Hot baked goods. 1165 00:50:45,167 --> 00:50:46,584 KELLY: I don't think he ever gave up 1166 00:50:46,667 --> 00:50:47,751 on the Danny Kaye dream. 1167 00:50:47,834 --> 00:50:49,125 Well, hello, Susan. 1168 00:50:49,209 --> 00:50:53,167 You look fabulous this morning. I'm so glad you both got laid. 1169 00:50:53,250 --> 00:50:55,250 He loved doing Shining Time Station. 1170 00:50:55,334 --> 00:50:57,125 He loved being Rufus. 1171 00:50:57,209 --> 00:50:59,792 Then he calls me up. He said, "I got a TV show." 1172 00:50:59,876 --> 00:51:01,334 I said, "Oh, how cool is that?" 1173 00:51:01,417 --> 00:51:03,626 Hey, don't buy any book by a stand-up comedian 1174 00:51:03,709 --> 00:51:04,667 who's got a sitcom. 1175 00:51:04,751 --> 00:51:06,209 They don't know what they're talking about. 1176 00:51:06,292 --> 00:51:07,584 He says, "Yeah, you're on the payroll." 1177 00:51:07,667 --> 00:51:09,417 I said, "What's my job?" 1178 00:51:09,500 --> 00:51:13,292 And he says, "To help maintain my New York attitude." 1179 00:51:14,667 --> 00:51:16,417 With a broomstick! 1180 00:51:16,500 --> 00:51:18,417 HOST: George Carlin stars in The George Carlin Show 1181 00:51:18,500 --> 00:51:20,751 on Sunday nights. He plays George O'Grady. 1182 00:51:20,834 --> 00:51:22,500 If I was willing to apologize, 1183 00:51:22,584 --> 00:51:24,083 I could have stayed in the altar boys, 1184 00:51:24,167 --> 00:51:26,918 the Boy Scouts, the choir, three Catholic schools, 1185 00:51:27,042 --> 00:51:28,250 and the Air Force. 1186 00:51:28,334 --> 00:51:30,918 First of all, my acting bug has never been satisfied, 1187 00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:34,584 and I had Sam Simon. Sam's credentials include Taxi, 1188 00:51:34,667 --> 00:51:37,083 Cheers, Tracy Ullman, and The Simpsons. 1189 00:51:37,167 --> 00:51:40,167 I thought at 56, maybe I owe Brenda, my wife, 1190 00:51:40,250 --> 00:51:42,834 and me a shot at a real home run. 1191 00:51:42,918 --> 00:51:45,000 ♪ (PLAYFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1192 00:51:45,083 --> 00:51:46,459 GEORGE: I've always been an outsider 1193 00:51:46,542 --> 00:51:49,417 and a loner, in my life and in my career. 1194 00:51:50,292 --> 00:51:51,792 Onstage, out there alone, 1195 00:51:51,876 --> 00:51:53,334 you've written everything yourself, 1196 00:51:53,417 --> 00:51:54,626 you deliver it yourself, 1197 00:51:54,709 --> 00:51:56,751 you're directing and producing. It's a complete solo act. 1198 00:51:56,834 --> 00:51:58,292 And I just think there's a part of me 1199 00:51:58,375 --> 00:51:59,292 that wants to belong, 1200 00:51:59,375 --> 00:52:00,959 that wants to be a part of a group 1201 00:52:01,042 --> 00:52:02,375 that wants to collaborate. 1202 00:52:02,459 --> 00:52:04,959 And that's what acting is, the ultimate collaborative art. 1203 00:52:07,459 --> 00:52:08,792 ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪ 1204 00:52:08,876 --> 00:52:13,709 My dad did it... because he wanted to stay at home 1205 00:52:13,792 --> 00:52:17,334 and spend time with my mom and get off the fucking road. 1206 00:52:17,417 --> 00:52:22,459 He was tired. He was sold the idea 1207 00:52:22,542 --> 00:52:26,709 that you can stay home and have a life. 1208 00:52:27,959 --> 00:52:31,334 But Dad started working 14-hour days 1209 00:52:31,417 --> 00:52:33,667 and realizing that he was not home with my mom. 1210 00:52:33,751 --> 00:52:37,834 And he was exhausted. And irritated and at war 1211 00:52:37,918 --> 00:52:40,500 with his other executive producer. 1212 00:52:40,584 --> 00:52:42,834 SAM SIMON: At the time, this is when Seinfeld 1213 00:52:42,918 --> 00:52:46,209 was looking at 250 million dollars from his show. 1214 00:52:46,292 --> 00:52:48,918 And he said it, he felt he owed it to his family 1215 00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:50,667 to hit a home run, 1216 00:52:50,751 --> 00:52:55,167 but they wanted to change the tone of the network. 1217 00:52:55,250 --> 00:52:57,209 So, in spite of pretty good numbers, 1218 00:52:57,292 --> 00:52:58,751 the show was canceled. 1219 00:52:59,834 --> 00:53:02,584 He's a guy that wrote all his own material 1220 00:53:02,667 --> 00:53:04,918 and got on the stage by himself, 1221 00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:09,292 and just the nature of what we were doing isn't that. 1222 00:53:09,375 --> 00:53:11,876 So it's just weird that he considers it 1223 00:53:11,959 --> 00:53:13,459 this black mark and this failure 1224 00:53:13,542 --> 00:53:15,959 'cause you just go, "Well, that's TV." 1225 00:53:17,834 --> 00:53:22,375 That's why most comedians fail. We're not good collaborators, 1226 00:53:22,459 --> 00:53:24,209 obviously. (CHUCKLES) 1227 00:53:24,292 --> 00:53:26,000 Why the hell are you up there by yourself? 1228 00:53:27,000 --> 00:53:28,626 Because that's how you feel comfortable. 1229 00:53:29,751 --> 00:53:32,584 I remember somebody asking me once, 1230 00:53:33,709 --> 00:53:37,292 "Would you ever consider doing a Broadway play?" 1231 00:53:37,375 --> 00:53:40,959 And I went, "You mean where I would have to wait" 1232 00:53:41,042 --> 00:53:44,042 till someone else finishes talking before I talk? 1233 00:53:45,167 --> 00:53:46,292 "Why would I do that?" 1234 00:53:47,500 --> 00:53:50,792 That's when you have to melt yourself down 1235 00:53:50,876 --> 00:53:53,125 and pour yourself into a different bottle, 1236 00:53:53,709 --> 00:53:54,751 to collaborate. 1237 00:53:54,834 --> 00:53:58,751 Hey, the streets are safer with you behind bars. 1238 00:53:58,834 --> 00:53:59,918 GEORGE: When they called me... 1239 00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:01,083 Well, I won't be in here long! 1240 00:54:01,167 --> 00:54:02,417 ...and told me it had been canceled... 1241 00:54:02,500 --> 00:54:05,667 They haven't made the jail that can hold George O'Grady. 1242 00:54:05,751 --> 00:54:07,459 ...I said, "Thank you." 1243 00:54:07,542 --> 00:54:11,083 It was a detour that I had to make one final time. 1244 00:54:11,167 --> 00:54:13,250 And there'll be a trial of dead screws behind me. 1245 00:54:13,334 --> 00:54:15,000 CALLER: Hi, George. I'm a big fan of yours. 1246 00:54:15,083 --> 00:54:17,167 I loved your show. It didn't make it. 1247 00:54:17,250 --> 00:54:19,000 Are we going to see you on TV again? 1248 00:54:19,083 --> 00:54:21,250 No, I'm very happy that it didn't make it 1249 00:54:21,334 --> 00:54:23,000 because I really didn't fit 1250 00:54:23,083 --> 00:54:25,667 in that kind of commercial comedy setting. 1251 00:54:25,751 --> 00:54:27,000 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 1252 00:54:27,083 --> 00:54:28,959 GEORGE: Trouble is it was fun on the stage, 1253 00:54:29,042 --> 00:54:31,500 it wasn't fun in the offices, and that's fine. 1254 00:54:31,584 --> 00:54:33,125 I'm happy to be doing what I love 1255 00:54:33,209 --> 00:54:34,375 and that is my stand up. 1256 00:54:34,459 --> 00:54:37,292 This next piece of material is real simple. 1257 00:54:37,375 --> 00:54:40,500 It's called "Free-Floating Hostility." 1258 00:54:40,584 --> 00:54:44,042 Cultural items I'm bored with, tired of, and pissed at. 1259 00:54:44,125 --> 00:54:47,667 People who make quote marks in the air with their fingers. 1260 00:54:47,751 --> 00:54:49,500 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -What about these people 1261 00:54:49,584 --> 00:54:51,667 who tell you their needs aren't being met? 1262 00:54:51,751 --> 00:54:53,125 What about these guys who tell you, 1263 00:54:53,209 --> 00:54:55,209 "I heard that." Too many vehicles. 1264 00:54:55,292 --> 00:54:58,709 White guys who wear their baseball hats backwards? 1265 00:54:58,792 --> 00:55:00,417 What is all this shit about angels? 1266 00:55:00,500 --> 00:55:03,459 What the fuck do White people have to be blue about? 1267 00:55:03,542 --> 00:55:04,667 Something else I don't understand, 1268 00:55:04,751 --> 00:55:05,834 -motivation tapes. -(AUDIENCE LAUGH) 1269 00:55:05,918 --> 00:55:08,542 Banana Republic ran out of khakis? 1270 00:55:08,626 --> 00:55:10,584 Now suddenly, everyone is walking around 1271 00:55:10,667 --> 00:55:12,918 with their own personal bottle of water. 1272 00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:15,709 When did we get so thirsty in America? 1273 00:55:15,792 --> 00:55:18,918 Three out of four people now believe in angels. 1274 00:55:19,000 --> 00:55:21,792 -What, are you fucking stupid? -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1275 00:55:21,876 --> 00:55:24,125 Besides, if you're motivated enough to go to the store 1276 00:55:24,209 --> 00:55:25,167 to buy a motivation book, 1277 00:55:25,250 --> 00:55:26,626 aren't you motivated enough to do that? 1278 00:55:26,709 --> 00:55:28,209 So you don't need the book. Put it back, tell the court, 1279 00:55:28,292 --> 00:55:29,667 "Fuck you. I'm motivated. I'm going home. 1280 00:55:29,751 --> 00:55:31,167 -I'm going home." -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1281 00:55:32,918 --> 00:55:34,876 I'm getting a little tired of hearing 1282 00:55:34,959 --> 00:55:37,083 that after six policemen get arrested 1283 00:55:37,167 --> 00:55:40,000 for shoving a floor lamp up some Black guy's ass 1284 00:55:40,083 --> 00:55:42,918 and ripping his intestines out, the Police Department announces 1285 00:55:43,000 --> 00:55:45,334 they're going to have sensitivity training. 1286 00:55:45,417 --> 00:55:46,500 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1287 00:55:46,584 --> 00:55:49,167 I say, "Hey, if you need special training to be told" 1288 00:55:49,250 --> 00:55:51,292 not to jam a large cumbersome object 1289 00:55:51,375 --> 00:55:54,250 up someone else's asshole, maybe you're too fucked up 1290 00:55:54,334 --> 00:55:56,417 to be on the police force in the first place. 1291 00:55:56,500 --> 00:55:58,751 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) -Maybe. Maybe not. 1292 00:55:58,834 --> 00:56:02,375 Maybe not. I don't know. You know what they oughta do? 1293 00:56:02,459 --> 00:56:03,876 They oughta have two new requirements 1294 00:56:03,959 --> 00:56:07,626 for being on the police, intelligence and decency. 1295 00:56:07,709 --> 00:56:10,209 You never can tell. It might just work. 1296 00:56:10,292 --> 00:56:12,918 It certainly hasn't been tried yet. 1297 00:56:13,000 --> 00:56:15,167 (CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 1298 00:56:15,250 --> 00:56:17,375 REPORTER: George Carlin, the hippy-dippie weatherman, 1299 00:56:17,459 --> 00:56:21,959 turned 60 this month, 60, and this ninth-grade dropout... 1300 00:56:22,042 --> 00:56:23,542 Yeah, Cardinal Hayes... 1301 00:56:23,626 --> 00:56:25,876 REPORTER: ...I know. I didn't believe it either, 1302 00:56:25,959 --> 00:56:29,292 somewhere along the way fell in love with ideas 1303 00:56:29,375 --> 00:56:32,667 and words and has just written his first book, 1304 00:56:32,751 --> 00:56:36,125 Braindroppings, which questions some of the major issues 1305 00:56:36,209 --> 00:56:37,542 of our time. 1306 00:56:37,626 --> 00:56:42,751 When it comes to bullshit, truly Major League bullshit, 1307 00:56:42,834 --> 00:56:45,751 you have to stand back in awe, 1308 00:56:45,834 --> 00:56:49,000 in awe of the all-time heavyweight champion 1309 00:56:49,083 --> 00:56:50,167 of false promises 1310 00:56:50,250 --> 00:56:52,542 and exaggerated claims, religion. 1311 00:56:52,626 --> 00:56:53,500 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 1312 00:56:53,584 --> 00:56:57,667 Organized religion, it's no contest. 1313 00:56:58,334 --> 00:57:00,500 Religion easily, easily, 1314 00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:05,417 has the best bullshit story of all time. Think about it. 1315 00:57:05,500 --> 00:57:11,125 Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man 1316 00:57:11,209 --> 00:57:16,042 living in the sky who watches everything you do 1317 00:57:16,125 --> 00:57:19,292 -every minute of every day. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1318 00:57:19,375 --> 00:57:20,834 And the invisible man 1319 00:57:20,918 --> 00:57:24,167 has a list of ten specific things 1320 00:57:24,250 --> 00:57:26,292 -he doesn't want you to do. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1321 00:57:26,375 --> 00:57:28,709 And if you do any of these things, 1322 00:57:28,792 --> 00:57:31,542 he will send you to a special place... 1323 00:57:33,626 --> 00:57:38,167 of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish 1324 00:57:38,250 --> 00:57:43,209 for you to live forever and suffer and burn and scream 1325 00:57:43,292 --> 00:57:45,042 until the end of time. 1326 00:57:46,584 --> 00:57:49,209 -But he loves you. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1327 00:57:49,292 --> 00:57:51,167 -He loves you. -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 1328 00:57:54,626 --> 00:57:58,167 He loves you and he needs money. 1329 00:57:58,250 --> 00:58:00,792 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1330 00:58:02,167 --> 00:58:04,292 He always needs money. 1331 00:58:05,918 --> 00:58:10,250 He's all-powerful, all-present, all-knowing, and all-wise. 1332 00:58:10,334 --> 00:58:14,000 -Just can't handle money. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1333 00:58:14,083 --> 00:58:15,375 Do you feel your place in comedy now? 1334 00:58:15,459 --> 00:58:16,667 Do you feel that place? Is that... 1335 00:58:16,751 --> 00:58:17,709 That is growing on me. 1336 00:58:17,792 --> 00:58:20,459 I think longevity is a wonderful thing. 1337 00:58:20,542 --> 00:58:22,500 Sometimes you get applause just for not being dead 1338 00:58:22,584 --> 00:58:23,667 -when you say... -(LAUGHS) 1339 00:58:23,751 --> 00:58:26,125 It's true. When you say, "I'm going to be 60," 1340 00:58:26,209 --> 00:58:29,459 they applaud that. Wonderful, he's not dead, 60. 1341 00:58:29,542 --> 00:58:33,584 Uh, so, but, but I'm getting a sense of it. 1342 00:58:33,667 --> 00:58:36,042 You know, when you're in planes three days a week. 1343 00:58:36,125 --> 00:58:37,751 I go out every Friday, I come home every Monday. 1344 00:58:37,834 --> 00:58:39,584 It's three different cities, three different nights, 1345 00:58:39,667 --> 00:58:42,292 airports, hotel lobbies, and people are wonderful. 1346 00:58:42,375 --> 00:58:45,542 People-- I love individuals. I hate groups of people. 1347 00:58:45,626 --> 00:58:46,542 I hate people who have 1348 00:58:46,626 --> 00:58:49,083 a group of people with a common purpose, 1349 00:58:49,167 --> 00:58:51,042 because pretty soon they have little hats... 1350 00:58:51,125 --> 00:58:54,626 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -...you know, and armbands, 1351 00:58:54,709 --> 00:58:57,542 and fight songs, and a list of people 1352 00:58:57,626 --> 00:59:00,167 they're going to visit at 3:00 a.m. 1353 00:59:00,250 --> 00:59:02,626 So, I dislike and despise groups of people, 1354 00:59:02,709 --> 00:59:06,083 but I love individuals. And so, cumulatively, 1355 00:59:06,167 --> 00:59:08,584 I have gotten the feeling that I'm in this big family. 1356 00:59:08,667 --> 00:59:10,417 A family life I never had, by the way, 1357 00:59:10,500 --> 00:59:12,792 this so to say, extended family 1358 00:59:12,876 --> 00:59:14,834 of people who feel like you're their cousin. 1359 00:59:14,918 --> 00:59:17,500 Just like, "Georgie, in 1961, I saw you. 1360 00:59:17,584 --> 00:59:18,959 Hey, remember that?" "Yes." 1361 00:59:19,042 --> 00:59:21,125 "Oh, and you know what you said?" I said, "Did I?" 1362 00:59:21,209 --> 00:59:24,292 "Oh, yes." It's just great. And so, cumulatively, 1363 00:59:24,375 --> 00:59:27,375 you say, "Well, I guess I'm in the family. 1364 00:59:27,459 --> 00:59:28,918 I guess it's okay." 1365 00:59:29,000 --> 00:59:31,500 JOURNALIST: He's there, George! George. 1366 00:59:31,584 --> 00:59:35,292 GEORGE: I met my wife, Brenda, 35 years ago in a nightclub 1367 00:59:35,375 --> 00:59:36,500 in Dayton, Ohio. 1368 00:59:36,584 --> 00:59:40,751 And she has taken every step of this trip with me. 1369 00:59:40,834 --> 00:59:42,000 In the beginning, 1370 00:59:42,083 --> 00:59:44,459 she sat back of those bad nightclubs 1371 00:59:45,334 --> 00:59:47,292 and had to watch my second show 1372 00:59:48,417 --> 00:59:50,000 when the 12 people in the audience 1373 00:59:50,083 --> 00:59:52,334 had already seen my first show 1374 00:59:52,417 --> 00:59:55,125 and I was forced to do the B material. 1375 00:59:55,209 --> 00:59:57,459 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1376 00:59:59,292 --> 01:00:02,167 She gave birth to our miraculous daughter, Kelly, 1377 01:00:02,250 --> 01:00:04,834 who once slept on the stage right near me 1378 01:00:04,918 --> 01:00:08,334 all through a show I did at a college in Georgia. 1379 01:00:08,417 --> 01:00:12,083 She was nine years old. Kelly, not Brenda. 1380 01:00:12,167 --> 01:00:14,876 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1381 01:00:14,959 --> 01:00:18,626 Then, in 1970, when I discovered I had to follow my heart 1382 01:00:18,709 --> 01:00:22,459 and go from a suit and tie to a beard and jeans, 1383 01:00:22,542 --> 01:00:25,459 and take a pay cut of about 80 percent, 1384 01:00:25,542 --> 01:00:28,334 Brenda never blinked. Never blinked. 1385 01:00:28,417 --> 01:00:30,542 Even though it meant walking away 1386 01:00:30,626 --> 01:00:32,876 from the purchase of our very first home, 1387 01:00:32,959 --> 01:00:36,834 which was in escrow at the time. And you know what she said? 1388 01:00:37,709 --> 01:00:40,375 When I told her what I wanted to do, 1389 01:00:40,459 --> 01:00:45,125 she said, "I'm going to make up your new press kit." 1390 01:00:45,209 --> 01:00:47,375 She's the best I could ever have wished for. 1391 01:00:47,959 --> 01:00:50,626 So, Brenda, thank you. 1392 01:00:50,709 --> 01:00:53,834 -Thank you. -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 1393 01:00:59,459 --> 01:01:01,584 And Brenda, as they say on these occasions, 1394 01:01:01,667 --> 01:01:03,876 half of this belongs to you. 1395 01:01:03,959 --> 01:01:08,417 I promise you, later on, when we sell this thing... 1396 01:01:08,500 --> 01:01:09,918 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1397 01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:11,792 ...I'll split the money with you. 1398 01:01:11,876 --> 01:01:15,292 Thanks, everybody, very, very much. Thank you. 1399 01:01:15,375 --> 01:01:16,667 ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1400 01:01:16,751 --> 01:01:18,626 CROWD: Surprise! 1401 01:01:18,709 --> 01:01:23,250 (CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 1402 01:01:29,292 --> 01:01:30,959 HOST: You've had a long, successful, 1403 01:01:31,042 --> 01:01:32,876 -happy marriage. -GEORGE: Yes, sir. 1404 01:01:32,959 --> 01:01:34,626 HOST: In a society where that's unusual, 1405 01:01:34,709 --> 01:01:36,876 in a profession where it's very unusual. 1406 01:01:36,959 --> 01:01:40,167 GEORGE: Brenda and I were lucky to have found one another. 1407 01:01:40,250 --> 01:01:42,000 We had our problems as everyone has. 1408 01:01:42,083 --> 01:01:44,209 We had to get past some bad things, 1409 01:01:44,292 --> 01:01:46,626 but we always had our senses of humor. 1410 01:01:46,709 --> 01:01:49,876 And we always had a kind of loyalty to each other. 1411 01:01:49,959 --> 01:01:52,542 "I think there's a little aspect of, "You know, 1412 01:01:52,626 --> 01:01:54,292 we did this and here we are. 1413 01:01:54,375 --> 01:01:57,751 "It's us. It's not you and me. It's us." 1414 01:02:01,709 --> 01:02:04,000 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ 1415 01:02:04,083 --> 01:02:07,292 ♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1416 01:02:17,292 --> 01:02:22,209 KELLY: When my mom got sick... from liver cancer, 1417 01:02:23,125 --> 01:02:25,417 the oncologist said to us 1418 01:02:25,500 --> 01:02:28,375 she has maybe three months to live. 1419 01:02:28,459 --> 01:02:32,792 And so he was in denial a bit about it. I certainly was. 1420 01:02:32,876 --> 01:02:34,792 We have a family meeting, and we were going to have 1421 01:02:34,876 --> 01:02:37,667 a big 60th birthday for my dad. And my dad says, 1422 01:02:37,751 --> 01:02:41,876 "We're not going to do this birthday party. 1423 01:02:41,959 --> 01:02:44,876 Let's do it when Mom stabilizes in a few months." 1424 01:02:46,375 --> 01:02:49,500 And none of us are talking about what's actually going on, 1425 01:02:49,584 --> 01:02:52,792 which is my mother's not going to be alive in six months. 1426 01:02:53,876 --> 01:02:55,667 Nobody's talking about it. 1427 01:02:57,542 --> 01:02:58,876 And then my dad says, 1428 01:02:59,709 --> 01:03:01,125 "I have to go on the road." 1429 01:03:01,209 --> 01:03:04,250 And it's like a ten-day trip he's got to go on the road. 1430 01:03:04,334 --> 01:03:06,125 And I'm like, "What?" 1431 01:03:08,375 --> 01:03:13,500 I'm furious inside, and at the same time, 1432 01:03:13,584 --> 01:03:18,083 stupefied by my own inability to say, "You have to stay home." 1433 01:03:21,959 --> 01:03:23,375 JEFF ABRAHAM: You know, he had his first book 1434 01:03:23,459 --> 01:03:27,209 coming out, Braindroppings. And he had this press tour. 1435 01:03:27,292 --> 01:03:29,125 You know, we had started probably about a month or so 1436 01:03:29,209 --> 01:03:31,876 just prior to that. And he would go out, 1437 01:03:31,959 --> 01:03:34,667 do a couple dates, race home, see Brenda. 1438 01:03:34,751 --> 01:03:36,709 And he was all set to do Letterman. 1439 01:03:36,792 --> 01:03:39,000 You know, he flew to New York 1440 01:03:39,083 --> 01:03:41,834 "and he got the call, "Brenda's probably not going to make it 1441 01:03:41,918 --> 01:03:43,209 through the weekend." 1442 01:03:46,417 --> 01:03:48,334 JERRY: I don't know if she was dead 1443 01:03:48,417 --> 01:03:50,459 when he walked in the room or not, 1444 01:03:52,709 --> 01:03:56,876 but I do remember that she had a teardrop. 1445 01:03:56,959 --> 01:04:02,250 And George took a Kleenex and wiped her eye 1446 01:04:02,334 --> 01:04:05,375 and saved that Kleenex till the day he died. 1447 01:04:06,125 --> 01:04:07,209 Brenda. 1448 01:04:12,417 --> 01:04:15,542 ♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪ 1449 01:04:19,000 --> 01:04:20,542 KELLY: She died on Mother's Day. 1450 01:04:23,209 --> 01:04:25,000 But to watch my dad... 1451 01:04:29,083 --> 01:04:34,542 take her, um... face in his hands, 1452 01:04:34,626 --> 01:04:37,959 and he was just like, "Oh, Brenny. Oh, Brenny. 1453 01:04:38,042 --> 01:04:41,250 I'm so sorry." And it was just like... 1454 01:04:42,375 --> 01:04:44,250 you know, they loved each other so much, 1455 01:04:44,334 --> 01:04:46,083 and, um... 1456 01:04:46,167 --> 01:04:49,083 it was such a fucked way for it to end. 1457 01:04:51,918 --> 01:04:55,626 I just pretty much after that dedicated myself, you know, 1458 01:04:55,709 --> 01:04:57,125 "I'm not going to pretend anymore. 1459 01:04:57,209 --> 01:05:00,292 I'm not pretending with my dad anymore." 1460 01:05:00,375 --> 01:05:02,751 My dad and I actually, after that, we were like, 1461 01:05:02,834 --> 01:05:05,167 "All right, we need to learn how to talk to each other." 1462 01:05:05,250 --> 01:05:08,375 Because we got how fucked up it all was. 1463 01:05:11,500 --> 01:05:14,000 LARRY KING: Tragedy came into George Carlin's life recently 1464 01:05:14,083 --> 01:05:16,500 after a long and very happy marriage, 1465 01:05:16,584 --> 01:05:18,417 the death of his wife. And this book wasn't-- 1466 01:05:18,500 --> 01:05:20,083 -You didn't time it this way. -GEORGE: No. 1467 01:05:20,167 --> 01:05:21,584 So you're committed to this tour. 1468 01:05:21,667 --> 01:05:23,000 I'm sure you wouldn't be out on it. 1469 01:05:23,083 --> 01:05:26,167 Brenda was ill at the time the book tour was being booked. 1470 01:05:26,250 --> 01:05:27,709 And I like to say, 1471 01:05:27,792 --> 01:05:29,918 Brenda not only was the light of my life, 1472 01:05:30,000 --> 01:05:31,709 she was the keeper of my dreams. 1473 01:05:31,792 --> 01:05:32,876 How do you deal with it, George? 1474 01:05:32,959 --> 01:05:36,209 Well, you just have to get each day done 1475 01:05:36,292 --> 01:05:37,584 a little bit at a time. 1476 01:05:37,667 --> 01:05:39,459 And you go from emotion to logic. 1477 01:05:39,542 --> 01:05:40,751 During the first few weeks, 1478 01:05:40,834 --> 01:05:42,959 there's so many things to do and think about 1479 01:05:43,042 --> 01:05:46,792 that you bounce back and forth between feeling and thinking. 1480 01:05:46,876 --> 01:05:49,375 And there are times when you hit a low. 1481 01:05:49,459 --> 01:05:52,459 And there are times when you're okay, sort of. 1482 01:05:52,542 --> 01:05:53,626 Do you live lots of memories 1483 01:05:53,709 --> 01:05:55,125 -when you have that many years? -Oh, yes. 1484 01:05:55,209 --> 01:05:57,334 Every city that I've been in on my own, 1485 01:05:57,417 --> 01:06:00,584 I've been in with Brenda. Almost every one. 1486 01:06:00,667 --> 01:06:03,042 We drove every mile of this country together. 1487 01:06:03,125 --> 01:06:05,876 Early in the marriage, we lived out of our Dodge Dart. 1488 01:06:05,959 --> 01:06:10,000 It's not just sorrow and loss. It's savoring what you had. 1489 01:06:10,834 --> 01:06:14,083 ♪ (SORROWFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1490 01:06:16,459 --> 01:06:17,584 Excuse me. 1491 01:06:19,584 --> 01:06:22,167 Fill them pews, people. That's the key. 1492 01:06:22,250 --> 01:06:25,334 Grab the little ones as well. Hook them while they're young. 1493 01:06:25,417 --> 01:06:28,667 So, in 1998, we get ready to make this picture, Dogma. 1494 01:06:28,751 --> 01:06:31,417 When we were casting, they were like... 1495 01:06:31,500 --> 01:06:33,334 All right. Mistakes were made. 1496 01:06:33,417 --> 01:06:35,959 ..."Who do you see as Cardinal Glick?" 1497 01:06:36,042 --> 01:06:37,500 And I said, "George Carlin." 1498 01:06:37,584 --> 01:06:40,667 Now, we all know how the majority and the media 1499 01:06:40,751 --> 01:06:43,375 in this country view the Catholic Church. 1500 01:06:43,459 --> 01:06:45,209 KEVIN: One day he came up to me on set, 1501 01:06:45,292 --> 01:06:48,083 "he goes, "As you know, my wife just passed away. 1502 01:06:48,167 --> 01:06:52,083 I'm not ready to take off my wedding band yet." 1503 01:06:52,167 --> 01:06:55,459 So what I came up with is, if it's okay with you 1504 01:06:55,542 --> 01:06:59,292 and if it's okay for the movie, if I put a Band-Aid, 1505 01:06:59,375 --> 01:07:02,918 if Cardinal Glick has a Band-Aid on his finger the whole movie, 1506 01:07:03,000 --> 01:07:05,876 it would allow me to keep my wedding band on 1507 01:07:05,959 --> 01:07:07,584 "because it's just too soon." 1508 01:07:10,042 --> 01:07:11,375 ROCCO URBISCI: There's a period of healing 1509 01:07:11,459 --> 01:07:13,042 you have to go through, and then you realize, 1510 01:07:13,125 --> 01:07:14,876 you know, you're still here. 1511 01:07:14,959 --> 01:07:16,834 And they would want you to do what you do. 1512 01:07:18,250 --> 01:07:21,709 That's a gift you were given, and for you not to do it 1513 01:07:22,209 --> 01:07:23,375 would be a sin. 1514 01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:28,125 So George did what he always did, 1515 01:07:28,584 --> 01:07:29,876 went home... 1516 01:07:29,959 --> 01:07:32,459 (LIGHT TAPPING) 1517 01:07:32,542 --> 01:07:34,000 ...and wrote. 1518 01:07:34,083 --> 01:07:36,709 ♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1519 01:07:51,417 --> 01:07:53,083 GEORGE: Religion tries to tell us 1520 01:07:53,167 --> 01:07:55,292 that there's meaning and that there's purpose 1521 01:07:55,375 --> 01:07:57,918 and there's design, and there isn't. 1522 01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:02,292 It is all chaos and random and chance. 1523 01:08:02,375 --> 01:08:04,751 Religion takes a basic impulse we all have, 1524 01:08:04,834 --> 01:08:06,417 which is a spiritual yearning. 1525 01:08:06,500 --> 01:08:10,167 To be reunited somehow with the universe. 1526 01:08:10,250 --> 01:08:11,959 And that's what religion exploits. 1527 01:08:12,042 --> 01:08:13,125 They call it God. 1528 01:08:13,209 --> 01:08:16,083 They say he has rules, and I think it's cruel. 1529 01:08:16,167 --> 01:08:20,042 ♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪ 1530 01:08:26,417 --> 01:08:28,209 GEORGE: I have pulled away and I now reside out 1531 01:08:28,292 --> 01:08:31,375 where the Oort cloud is, where the comets gather. 1532 01:08:31,459 --> 01:08:34,918 I finally decided that I would dissociate myself, 1533 01:08:35,000 --> 01:08:38,834 view all of this as an absurd, tragic comedy, 1534 01:08:38,918 --> 01:08:42,125 and really have a point of view that allowed me 1535 01:08:42,209 --> 01:08:45,167 to say anything that felt right, 1536 01:08:45,250 --> 01:08:48,334 that expressed how I was reacting to all of this, 1537 01:08:48,417 --> 01:08:50,500 and how it made me feel. 1538 01:08:50,584 --> 01:08:53,334 I sort of gave up on the human race 1539 01:08:53,417 --> 01:08:56,375 and decided that I didn't care about the outcome. 1540 01:08:56,459 --> 01:08:58,709 "Not caring about the outcome." What do you mean by that? 1541 01:08:58,792 --> 01:08:59,918 Right. Not having an emotional stake 1542 01:09:00,000 --> 01:09:02,542 in whether this experiment with human beings works. 1543 01:09:02,626 --> 01:09:05,500 I really don't care. I love people as I meet them 1544 01:09:05,584 --> 01:09:08,667 one by one. People are just wonderful as individuals. 1545 01:09:08,751 --> 01:09:10,250 You see the whole universe in their eyes 1546 01:09:10,334 --> 01:09:11,250 if you look carefully. 1547 01:09:11,334 --> 01:09:12,667 But as soon as they begin to group, 1548 01:09:12,751 --> 01:09:15,334 as soon as they begin to clot, when there are five of them 1549 01:09:15,417 --> 01:09:17,459 or ten, or even groups as small as two, 1550 01:09:17,542 --> 01:09:18,542 they begin to change. 1551 01:09:18,626 --> 01:09:20,667 They sacrifice the beauty of the individual 1552 01:09:20,751 --> 01:09:21,834 for the sake of the group. 1553 01:09:21,918 --> 01:09:25,459 I decided it was all under the control of groups now, 1554 01:09:25,542 --> 01:09:28,792 whether it's business, religion, political people or what. 1555 01:09:28,876 --> 01:09:32,751 And I would distance myself from wishing for a good outcome. 1556 01:09:32,834 --> 01:09:34,417 Let it do what it's going to do 1557 01:09:34,500 --> 01:09:36,292 and I'll enjoy it as an entertainment. 1558 01:09:36,375 --> 01:09:37,792 And not reflect on what it is on its own? 1559 01:09:37,876 --> 01:09:41,834 And when you say to yourself, "I don't care what happens." 1560 01:09:41,918 --> 01:09:44,125 It just gives you a broader perspective 1561 01:09:44,209 --> 01:09:46,334 for the art, for the words to emerge. 1562 01:09:53,000 --> 01:09:54,209 JON: The only other person 1563 01:09:54,292 --> 01:09:57,375 that I had a similar feeling about was Kurt Vonnegut, 1564 01:09:57,459 --> 01:10:00,751 who struck me as incredibly humanistic. 1565 01:10:01,834 --> 01:10:04,209 Someone with great care for the individual, 1566 01:10:04,292 --> 01:10:11,375 of great empathy, but of a real mistrust of institutions. 1567 01:10:11,459 --> 01:10:15,125 When you'd talk to him, everything was so rational. 1568 01:10:15,209 --> 01:10:18,292 If that was his spirituality, I think, 1569 01:10:18,375 --> 01:10:21,459 it was in the rational mind. 1570 01:10:21,542 --> 01:10:26,709 But I think he also felt outside of life. 1571 01:10:32,042 --> 01:10:35,459 JERRY: He would never talk like, "Oh, I'm going to die," 1572 01:10:35,542 --> 01:10:40,250 but I think he felt that way, that his days were numbered. 1573 01:10:40,334 --> 01:10:43,334 There are so many dates that I had to cancel 1574 01:10:43,417 --> 01:10:46,417 because George had to go to the hospital. 1575 01:10:46,500 --> 01:10:49,125 So I know he was afraid of it. 1576 01:10:49,209 --> 01:10:52,751 And what George needed, you know, he couldn't be alone. 1577 01:10:52,834 --> 01:10:55,292 He didn't... It was a funny combination, 1578 01:10:55,375 --> 01:10:57,500 he didn't really want to interact with people, 1579 01:10:57,584 --> 01:10:59,292 but he wanted somebody around. 1580 01:11:01,042 --> 01:11:02,709 You know, if he was going to get on the phone 1581 01:11:02,792 --> 01:11:05,918 after a show and call and talk about his show, 1582 01:11:06,000 --> 01:11:08,584 he wanted somebody to pick up the phone. 1583 01:11:08,667 --> 01:11:11,167 And, you know, he could throw the I love you's around, 1584 01:11:11,250 --> 01:11:13,334 but what I think he really wanted 1585 01:11:13,417 --> 01:11:15,584 was to say, "Hey, I tried that joke." 1586 01:11:15,667 --> 01:11:18,250 ♪ (PLAYFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1587 01:11:18,334 --> 01:11:19,626 JERRY: And then he met Sally. 1588 01:11:25,709 --> 01:11:27,626 SALLY WADE: One day, I went to the bookstore 1589 01:11:27,709 --> 01:11:29,542 with my dog, Spot. 1590 01:11:29,626 --> 01:11:33,626 And the only two people in there were George and myself. 1591 01:11:35,167 --> 01:11:37,792 I told myself, if he bent down to pet Spot, 1592 01:11:37,876 --> 01:11:39,751 that I would say hello to him. 1593 01:11:41,584 --> 01:11:44,334 And he bent down and pet Spot right away. 1594 01:11:48,125 --> 01:11:51,042 Our conversation at the time was, 1595 01:11:51,125 --> 01:11:54,667 he was trying to transform from being-- 1596 01:11:54,751 --> 01:11:57,042 from doing into being 1597 01:11:57,125 --> 01:11:59,959 and he was tired of always doing 1598 01:12:00,042 --> 01:12:02,500 and he wanted to just be who he was. 1599 01:12:04,334 --> 01:12:06,292 He walked me out to my car 1600 01:12:06,375 --> 01:12:09,000 and said that he'd call me in eight months. 1601 01:12:09,083 --> 01:12:10,167 He wanted to wait. 1602 01:12:10,250 --> 01:12:12,459 He wanted to honor the marriage that he'd lost. 1603 01:12:12,542 --> 01:12:16,834 And it would take eight months for it to be a year. 1604 01:12:16,918 --> 01:12:20,417 I figured I'd never see him again. And eight months later, 1605 01:12:20,500 --> 01:12:25,209 he called and asked me if I wanted to go get a bagel. 1606 01:12:25,292 --> 01:12:28,834 My instincts told me that he was a really nice guy. 1607 01:12:28,918 --> 01:12:33,125 And my instincts were wrong. He was much nicer than that. 1608 01:12:33,209 --> 01:12:34,459 He was sweeter than that. 1609 01:12:34,542 --> 01:12:36,834 I mean, he was the sweetest person 1610 01:12:37,500 --> 01:12:39,459 I think I've ever met. 1611 01:12:39,542 --> 01:12:42,000 AUTOMATED VOICE: Thursday, 3:46 a.m. 1612 01:12:42,083 --> 01:12:43,626 GEORGE: Hi, baby. How are you doing? 1613 01:12:43,709 --> 01:12:46,042 Well, it's over. It went very well. 1614 01:12:46,125 --> 01:12:48,292 A lot of laughs. They were a good audience. 1615 01:12:48,375 --> 01:12:51,083 AUTOMATED VOICE: Saturday, 6:51 p.m. 1616 01:12:51,167 --> 01:12:53,792 GEORGE: We're on the air today from Connecticut. 1617 01:12:53,876 --> 01:12:54,792 How do you like that? 1618 01:12:54,876 --> 01:12:56,709 A special broadcast to one person. 1619 01:12:56,792 --> 01:12:59,626 A fine, fine girl. Her name is Sally Wade. 1620 01:12:59,709 --> 01:13:02,292 Wow-ee, I say, "Wow, look at that Sal', 1621 01:13:02,375 --> 01:13:04,375 she is some dish. Wow-ee." 1622 01:13:04,459 --> 01:13:07,709 SALLY: We just started writing notes to each other. 1623 01:13:07,792 --> 01:13:12,292 And those evolved into us being from a different planet, 1624 01:13:12,375 --> 01:13:15,751 and that we were just a couple of five-year-olds 1625 01:13:15,834 --> 01:13:19,250 writing as very astute kids from Jupiter. 1626 01:13:19,334 --> 01:13:22,125 GEORGE: The Jupiterian king is out there goofing. 1627 01:13:22,209 --> 01:13:23,459 I'm out there goofing. 1628 01:13:23,542 --> 01:13:27,542 We were weird. And our weirdness connected. 1629 01:13:29,542 --> 01:13:31,584 So we married ourselves. 1630 01:13:31,667 --> 01:13:33,751 We didn't have the proper paperwork, 1631 01:13:33,834 --> 01:13:36,542 but we didn't think we needed that. 1632 01:13:37,334 --> 01:13:39,292 Saturday, 5:18 a.m. 1633 01:13:39,375 --> 01:13:43,542 GEORGE: ♪ As the sun Comes up in Baltimore ♪ 1634 01:13:43,626 --> 01:13:47,000 ♪ And the ships Sail out to sea ♪ 1635 01:13:47,083 --> 01:13:51,167 ♪ I get out of bed And stretch my balls ♪ 1636 01:13:51,250 --> 01:13:54,792 ♪ And I take a fucking pee ♪ 1637 01:13:54,876 --> 01:13:58,167 There's a lovely tune for you. I love you. Goodbye, baby. 1638 01:13:58,250 --> 01:13:59,209 (RECEIVER CLATTERS) 1639 01:13:59,292 --> 01:14:00,459 KEVIN: So, we were sitting around, 1640 01:14:00,542 --> 01:14:03,250 doing rehearsal. It was me, him, and Ben. 1641 01:14:03,334 --> 01:14:06,250 And he started talking about Sally and he talked about, 1642 01:14:06,334 --> 01:14:08,209 he's like, "I love it. It makes me feel young." 1643 01:14:08,292 --> 01:14:10,751 We play this game where we're not really a part 1644 01:14:10,834 --> 01:14:12,500 of this fucking world anymore, 1645 01:14:12,584 --> 01:14:14,459 where we enter the kingdom of the fairies 1646 01:14:14,542 --> 01:14:16,876 "and she's the fairy queen and I'm the fairy king." 1647 01:14:16,959 --> 01:14:20,459 And he went on this, like, very eloquent, 1648 01:14:20,542 --> 01:14:23,500 very uncharacteristic of George Carlin, 1649 01:14:23,584 --> 01:14:29,209 you know, almost fucking Ren Fest-y explanation. 1650 01:14:29,292 --> 01:14:30,834 I wanted to wave him off and be like, 1651 01:14:30,918 --> 01:14:32,876 "Not in front of Affleck." 1652 01:14:32,959 --> 01:14:35,209 Um, because as soon as we left, 1653 01:14:35,292 --> 01:14:38,209 Ben just immediately cornered me and was just like, 1654 01:14:38,292 --> 01:14:41,792 "Did you hear the part where he's the fairy king?" 1655 01:14:41,876 --> 01:14:44,167 ♪ (CALM MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1656 01:14:45,584 --> 01:14:48,292 ALLEY MILLS-BEAN: He seemed like a little boy. 1657 01:14:48,375 --> 01:14:52,042 (CHUCKLES) I mean, I don't know George from before, 1658 01:14:52,125 --> 01:14:56,834 so I don't know what he was like as a man earlier in his life, 1659 01:14:56,918 --> 01:15:01,459 but I felt like... both of them were like children. 1660 01:15:01,542 --> 01:15:03,000 GEORGE: I'm so in love... 1661 01:15:03,083 --> 01:15:04,334 ALLEY: You could just see the way 1662 01:15:04,417 --> 01:15:08,042 that George looked at her. He was madly in love with her. 1663 01:15:08,125 --> 01:15:11,709 GEORGE: ...Best baby doll in the whole wide world, 1664 01:15:11,792 --> 01:15:14,083 and I love you so... 1665 01:15:14,167 --> 01:15:18,375 ALLEY: I never saw him angry. I only saw him happy. 1666 01:15:23,584 --> 01:15:25,500 FILM CREW MEMBER: George Carlin promo. 1667 01:15:28,292 --> 01:15:30,292 -B-roll, b-roll. -SALLY: That's me. 1668 01:15:30,375 --> 01:15:31,626 There you go. What's your name? 1669 01:15:31,709 --> 01:15:33,334 -SALLY: I'm Findlay. -No, you're not. 1670 01:15:33,417 --> 01:15:34,834 -SALLY: Yes, I am. -GEORGE: Findlay? 1671 01:15:34,918 --> 01:15:37,209 -SALLY: Yes, that's me. -Findlay, Ohio. 1672 01:15:37,292 --> 01:15:38,375 GEORGE: Artists are on a journey. 1673 01:15:38,459 --> 01:15:39,584 They don't know where it is going. 1674 01:15:39,667 --> 01:15:41,083 They just know there's something else. 1675 01:15:41,167 --> 01:15:42,292 There's something more. 1676 01:15:42,375 --> 01:15:43,792 There's more in me. There's more to talk about. 1677 01:15:43,876 --> 01:15:44,959 -(LAUGHS) -Yeah, that's good. 1678 01:15:45,042 --> 01:15:46,667 Yeah, that's good. It does look real. 1679 01:15:46,751 --> 01:15:49,751 Pablo Casals, the great cellist. 1680 01:15:49,834 --> 01:15:52,459 He was in his nineties, and someone said to him, 1681 01:15:52,542 --> 01:15:55,834 "Master Casals, why, at your age, 1682 01:15:55,918 --> 01:15:58,375 do you bother practicing three hours a day?" 1683 01:15:58,459 --> 01:15:59,500 Hello. 1684 01:15:59,584 --> 01:16:01,459 "And he said, "Well, 1685 01:16:01,542 --> 01:16:04,209 I'm beginning to notice some improvement." 1686 01:16:04,292 --> 01:16:06,500 It's interesting and it's true. 1687 01:16:06,584 --> 01:16:09,209 And that's the thing that's in me. 1688 01:16:09,292 --> 01:16:11,751 I notice myself getting better at this. 1689 01:16:11,834 --> 01:16:16,918 Statistics show that every year, a million people commit suicide. 1690 01:16:17,000 --> 01:16:21,500 That's 2,800 a day. One every 30 seconds. 1691 01:16:24,167 --> 01:16:25,500 -(FILM CREW LAUGHS) -You know? 1692 01:16:25,584 --> 01:16:26,834 It's up to-- you sort of-- 1693 01:16:26,918 --> 01:16:29,000 It's the viewer's interpretation of that. 1694 01:16:29,083 --> 01:16:30,751 Like, "Is that an invitation to them?" 1695 01:16:30,834 --> 01:16:32,542 -FILM CREW 1: Yeah. -FILM CREW 2: Marking. 1696 01:16:34,918 --> 01:16:37,667 SALLY: The only thing I didn't know in all of this, 1697 01:16:37,751 --> 01:16:40,542 until he ended up in the hospital, 1698 01:16:40,626 --> 01:16:42,542 was that he did have heart problems. 1699 01:16:42,626 --> 01:16:45,167 I didn't know that in the beginning. 1700 01:16:45,250 --> 01:16:49,500 There were a few times when he needed stents in his heart 1701 01:16:49,584 --> 01:16:53,959 and a few times when I had to drive through every red light 1702 01:16:54,042 --> 01:16:57,334 there was to get to the hospital in time. 1703 01:16:59,042 --> 01:17:04,167 And we were just able to manage that somehow. 1704 01:17:13,459 --> 01:17:14,876 The closer you get to death, 1705 01:17:14,959 --> 01:17:18,000 the more you think there's something there. 1706 01:17:18,959 --> 01:17:20,542 He didn't believe in a sky God, 1707 01:17:20,626 --> 01:17:25,792 but he was spiritual in a way that meant magic 1708 01:17:25,876 --> 01:17:27,792 and positive things happening. 1709 01:17:27,876 --> 01:17:30,918 Like, he always had a stage crystal with him. 1710 01:17:31,000 --> 01:17:32,542 And I think most people would agree... 1711 01:17:32,626 --> 01:17:34,000 SALLY: So, when he was performing, 1712 01:17:34,083 --> 01:17:36,834 he had that kind of magic in his pocket. 1713 01:17:36,918 --> 01:17:39,083 And he could draw from that. 1714 01:17:39,167 --> 01:17:41,125 ...I'll bet you can have an all-suicide channel 1715 01:17:41,209 --> 01:17:42,584 -in this country. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1716 01:17:42,667 --> 01:17:45,000 I bet you. Well, shit, they got all-golf. 1717 01:17:45,083 --> 01:17:48,459 -What the fuck? Goddamn. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1718 01:17:48,542 --> 01:17:50,584 JEFF: George was having health problems, 1719 01:17:50,667 --> 01:17:53,751 checking himself into hospitals with heart conditions. 1720 01:17:53,834 --> 01:17:56,542 And I remember seeing George at the Comedy and Magic Club. 1721 01:17:56,626 --> 01:17:58,626 He pulled into the parking lot at 7:00. 1722 01:17:58,709 --> 01:18:00,334 I pulled in like at 7:01. 1723 01:18:00,417 --> 01:18:02,209 So our cars were there at the same time. 1724 01:18:02,292 --> 01:18:04,250 I go, "George, how you doing?" 1725 01:18:04,334 --> 01:18:07,042 He goes, "Oh, I just came back from the doctor." 1726 01:18:07,125 --> 01:18:09,334 And he lifted up his shirt... 1727 01:18:09,417 --> 01:18:11,792 and it looked like a science project. 1728 01:18:11,876 --> 01:18:13,083 It looked like something out of Alien. 1729 01:18:13,167 --> 01:18:16,542 It was black and blue with scars, and this is a man 1730 01:18:16,626 --> 01:18:18,751 who had his chest open a number of times. 1731 01:18:18,834 --> 01:18:20,000 Oh, what he went through. 1732 01:18:20,083 --> 01:18:21,918 We're gonna start at the bottom with the homeless people 1733 01:18:22,000 --> 01:18:23,334 because nobody gives a fuck about them. 1734 01:18:23,417 --> 01:18:24,500 Ain't nobody got no money for them. 1735 01:18:24,584 --> 01:18:25,959 They have no plans. They got no ideas. 1736 01:18:26,042 --> 01:18:27,918 They got nobody. Five hundred thousand of them are veterans, 1737 01:18:28,000 --> 01:18:29,834 and they still don't give a fuck about these people... 1738 01:18:29,918 --> 01:18:32,876 KELLY: I hadn't seen him for about three months. 1739 01:18:32,959 --> 01:18:35,000 And by the way, there's another bunch of homeless coming soon 1740 01:18:35,083 --> 01:18:37,626 when the housing bubble bursts and the dollar gets devalued 1741 01:18:37,709 --> 01:18:39,542 and you get a lot of middle-class homeless assholes, 1742 01:18:39,626 --> 01:18:40,792 and they'll be in there too. 1743 01:18:40,876 --> 01:18:43,876 KELLY: And he is going to do this big HBO special. 1744 01:18:43,959 --> 01:18:46,042 And he never let me see his HBO stuff 1745 01:18:46,125 --> 01:18:48,042 before the actual taping. 1746 01:18:48,959 --> 01:18:50,709 And I walk into his dressing room 1747 01:18:50,792 --> 01:18:54,375 and his back is to me and I see this person 1748 01:18:54,459 --> 01:18:56,250 standing in front of me and I think, 1749 01:18:56,334 --> 01:18:59,584 "Who's that elderly man?" First thought in my head was, 1750 01:18:59,667 --> 01:19:01,000 "Who's that-- Who's this this old guy 1751 01:19:01,083 --> 01:19:02,250 in my dad's dressing room?" 1752 01:19:02,334 --> 01:19:05,792 And he turns around and he is noticeably shorter, 1753 01:19:07,000 --> 01:19:09,709 and he is puffy, 1754 01:19:09,792 --> 01:19:12,209 and he's having difficulty breathing. 1755 01:19:12,292 --> 01:19:13,584 (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 1756 01:19:13,667 --> 01:19:16,375 KELLY: I thought to myself, "There's no way 1757 01:19:16,459 --> 01:19:18,709 he's about to go on stage and do an HBO special. 1758 01:19:18,792 --> 01:19:20,959 "There's no way he's going to make it through it." 1759 01:19:24,500 --> 01:19:26,000 Assassination. 1760 01:19:26,083 --> 01:19:28,083 You know what's interesting about assassination? 1761 01:19:28,167 --> 01:19:31,167 Well, not only does it change those popularity polls 1762 01:19:31,250 --> 01:19:32,334 in a big fucking hurry, 1763 01:19:34,042 --> 01:19:35,250 but it's also interesting to notice 1764 01:19:35,334 --> 01:19:36,751 who it is we assassinate. 1765 01:19:36,834 --> 01:19:39,667 Do you ever notice who it is? Stop to think who it is we kill? 1766 01:19:39,751 --> 01:19:41,125 It's always people who've told us 1767 01:19:41,209 --> 01:19:44,375 to live together in harmony and try to love one another. 1768 01:19:44,459 --> 01:19:47,709 Jesus, Gandhi, Lincoln, John Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, 1769 01:19:47,792 --> 01:19:49,500 Martin Luther King, Medgar Evers, 1770 01:19:49,584 --> 01:19:50,918 Malcolm X, John Lennon. 1771 01:19:51,000 --> 01:19:54,292 They all said, "Try to live together peacefully." Bam! 1772 01:19:54,375 --> 01:19:57,125 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -Right in the fucking head. 1773 01:19:59,542 --> 01:20:00,500 It did go really dark. 1774 01:20:00,584 --> 01:20:01,876 He didn't think it went really dark. 1775 01:20:01,959 --> 01:20:05,375 He went really dark. And he lost me a bit at the end. 1776 01:20:05,459 --> 01:20:06,542 It was too dark for me. 1777 01:20:06,626 --> 01:20:08,709 I like things that are excessive. 1778 01:20:08,792 --> 01:20:11,584 I like excessive behavior, excessive language, 1779 01:20:11,667 --> 01:20:15,959 excessive violence. It's fun. It's interesting. It's exciting. 1780 01:20:16,042 --> 01:20:18,459 I like it when nature is excessive. 1781 01:20:18,542 --> 01:20:21,334 That's why I like natural disasters. 1782 01:20:21,417 --> 01:20:23,667 All these natural disasters that have been going on, 1783 01:20:23,751 --> 01:20:27,834 I fucking love them. I can't get enough of them. 1784 01:20:27,918 --> 01:20:30,834 If it's a bit, then God bless him. 1785 01:20:30,918 --> 01:20:35,167 For... Or whatever. Nothing bless him, as he might prefer, 1786 01:20:35,250 --> 01:20:39,083 but to pursue that level of darkness... 1787 01:20:41,500 --> 01:20:43,417 in the hope that actually it would point 1788 01:20:43,500 --> 01:20:45,459 toward something hopeful 1789 01:20:45,542 --> 01:20:48,292 is expecting a lot from your audience. 1790 01:20:48,375 --> 01:20:49,417 ♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1791 01:20:49,500 --> 01:20:51,751 Because all you're stating is the dark part. 1792 01:20:51,834 --> 01:20:55,584 For centuries now, man has done everything he can 1793 01:20:55,667 --> 01:20:59,209 to destroy, defile, and interfere with nature, 1794 01:20:59,292 --> 01:21:02,375 so when nature strikes back and smacks man in the head 1795 01:21:02,459 --> 01:21:05,709 and kicks him in the nuts, I enjoy that. 1796 01:21:05,792 --> 01:21:09,417 I have absolutely no sympathy for human beings whatsoever. 1797 01:21:09,500 --> 01:21:11,042 None. 1798 01:21:11,125 --> 01:21:12,876 You know what makes me happy? 1799 01:21:12,959 --> 01:21:15,125 Watching my species destroy itself. 1800 01:21:15,209 --> 01:21:18,792 I really, I take it as a sport, as a kind of a hobby 1801 01:21:18,876 --> 01:21:22,334 and I root for the complete destruction of this culture 1802 01:21:22,417 --> 01:21:23,459 that we live in. 1803 01:21:23,542 --> 01:21:26,209 I root for underdogs, I root for nature. 1804 01:21:26,292 --> 01:21:28,292 Because on this planet, at this time, 1805 01:21:28,375 --> 01:21:30,292 nature is the underdog. 1806 01:21:30,375 --> 01:21:32,250 You know the best thing I can hear on television? 1807 01:21:32,334 --> 01:21:35,584 -"We interrupt this program." -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING) 1808 01:21:35,667 --> 01:21:38,626 You know the worst thing I can hear? "No one was hurt." 1809 01:21:38,709 --> 01:21:42,042 George's next special, November 17th on HBO Live. 1810 01:21:42,125 --> 01:21:43,125 What are you calling it? 1811 01:21:43,209 --> 01:21:45,584 I Kinda Like It When a Lot of People Die. 1812 01:21:45,667 --> 01:21:48,334 No, he did not like it when a lot of people died. 1813 01:21:48,417 --> 01:21:50,250 He did like it when a lot of people died. 1814 01:21:50,334 --> 01:21:52,500 GEORGE: I kinda like it when a lot of people die. 1815 01:21:52,584 --> 01:21:55,918 Some people like needlepoint, some people like miniature golf, 1816 01:21:56,000 --> 01:21:57,667 doing the mambo, shit like that. 1817 01:21:57,751 --> 01:22:00,000 -Me, I like a nice train wreck. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1818 01:22:00,083 --> 01:22:02,959 I always hope things are going to get worse. 1819 01:22:03,042 --> 01:22:05,459 Don't you? Don't you secretly hope 1820 01:22:05,542 --> 01:22:07,083 that everything gets worse? 1821 01:22:07,167 --> 01:22:11,250 When you see a big fire on TV, don't you hope it spreads? 1822 01:22:11,334 --> 01:22:14,000 Are you on the verge of losing your temper or are you... 1823 01:22:14,083 --> 01:22:15,834 -You're shaking your head. -No, it's not that. 1824 01:22:15,918 --> 01:22:17,042 It's-- It's a contempt. 1825 01:22:17,125 --> 01:22:20,751 I really think this species is a foolish, 1826 01:22:20,834 --> 01:22:24,876 failed species that has organized itself poorly. 1827 01:22:24,959 --> 01:22:28,292 And I think this culture in particular leads the way. 1828 01:22:28,375 --> 01:22:30,751 I think we have put property ahead of people, 1829 01:22:30,834 --> 01:22:33,626 we have put competition ahead of cooperation, 1830 01:22:33,709 --> 01:22:35,792 and I don't think the balance can ever be 1831 01:22:35,876 --> 01:22:37,292 brought back into line. 1832 01:22:37,375 --> 01:22:39,292 You know, philosophers say, "Why are we here? 1833 01:22:39,375 --> 01:22:42,292 What is this all about?" I'm here for the entertainment. 1834 01:22:42,375 --> 01:22:44,000 Fuck these humans. Let them do their thing. 1835 01:22:44,083 --> 01:22:46,167 I'll watch. It's fun. I'm out here. 1836 01:22:46,250 --> 01:22:48,250 I have no stake in the outcome anymore. 1837 01:22:48,334 --> 01:22:50,000 I don't care what happens to you. 1838 01:22:50,083 --> 01:22:51,459 I don't care what happens to your country. 1839 01:22:51,542 --> 01:22:53,042 I don't care what happens to your species. 1840 01:22:53,125 --> 01:22:54,209 You can go get fucked. 1841 01:22:54,292 --> 01:22:56,417 Because it's fun to watch you destroy each other. 1842 01:22:56,500 --> 01:23:01,459 -It's entertaining. Look at... -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 1843 01:23:01,542 --> 01:23:03,250 You got any dates you want to push? 1844 01:23:03,334 --> 01:23:04,918 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) -GEORGE: Yeah, right. 1845 01:23:05,000 --> 01:23:06,626 I'm not interested in the budget. 1846 01:23:06,709 --> 01:23:08,667 I don't care about tax negotiations. 1847 01:23:08,751 --> 01:23:10,000 I don't want to know what country 1848 01:23:10,083 --> 01:23:11,667 the fucking pope is in, 1849 01:23:11,751 --> 01:23:13,667 but you show me a hospital that's on fire, 1850 01:23:13,751 --> 01:23:15,584 and people on crutches are jumping off the roof, 1851 01:23:15,667 --> 01:23:17,000 and I'm a happy guy! 1852 01:23:17,083 --> 01:23:20,167 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) -I'm a happy guy! 1853 01:23:20,250 --> 01:23:22,334 HASAN: One of the things I'm still trying to figure out is, 1854 01:23:22,417 --> 01:23:28,250 was Carlin ultimately a nihilist or was he an actual optimist 1855 01:23:28,334 --> 01:23:33,459 who was using comedy to display a nihilist worldview? 1856 01:23:33,542 --> 01:23:36,083 Sirens, flames, smoke, bodies, graves being filled, 1857 01:23:36,167 --> 01:23:37,751 parents weeping, exciting shit, my kind of TV... 1858 01:23:37,834 --> 01:23:40,417 -HASAN: Is he the Joker? -I just want some entertainment, 1859 01:23:40,500 --> 01:23:41,834 It's just the kind of guy I am! 1860 01:23:41,918 --> 01:23:43,626 -It's the kind of guy I am! -HASAN: Is he happy? 1861 01:23:43,709 --> 01:23:46,876 (CHUCKLES) Like, shit is unraveling in front of our eyes. 1862 01:23:46,959 --> 01:23:48,417 Most people won't admit to those feelings. 1863 01:23:48,500 --> 01:23:50,167 Most people see something like that on television, 1864 01:23:50,250 --> 01:23:52,417 they'll say, "Oh, isn't that awful? Isn't that too bad?" 1865 01:23:52,500 --> 01:23:54,083 (BLOWS RASPBERRY) Lying asshole. 1866 01:23:54,167 --> 01:23:56,417 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) -Lying assholes. 1867 01:23:56,500 --> 01:23:59,125 GEORGE: This is what I root for. This is my joy. 1868 01:23:59,209 --> 01:24:01,709 Wait till I do my next show, you got to see the next one. 1869 01:24:01,792 --> 01:24:05,167 Two years from now, tune in. It's called Fuck Hope. 1870 01:24:08,250 --> 01:24:09,959 That was fun. Try to use a lot of that. 1871 01:24:10,042 --> 01:24:11,042 (FILM CREW LAUGHING) 1872 01:24:11,125 --> 01:24:12,709 GEORGE: You know, it's just, it's how I am. 1873 01:24:12,792 --> 01:24:15,792 It's how I feel. It's so real. You could tell. 1874 01:24:15,876 --> 01:24:18,042 It was really evident from the first time I met him 1875 01:24:18,125 --> 01:24:19,417 that he was fully committed 1876 01:24:19,500 --> 01:24:23,042 to, like, whatever that fuse was that he lit. 1877 01:24:23,125 --> 01:24:25,250 Probably back in high school, if not before, 1878 01:24:25,334 --> 01:24:28,918 that he never ever stomped out. And then over the years, 1879 01:24:29,000 --> 01:24:33,584 I just watched that, sort of, get overtaken by a ferocity. 1880 01:24:33,667 --> 01:24:36,417 You know, it wasn't really just a bitterness. 1881 01:24:36,500 --> 01:24:38,250 It was just a ferocity. It was just like, 1882 01:24:38,334 --> 01:24:39,751 "This world is fucked up 1883 01:24:39,834 --> 01:24:41,751 and no one's doing anything about it," 1884 01:24:41,834 --> 01:24:44,459 and like, "I've tried to explore" 1885 01:24:44,542 --> 01:24:47,417 the human condition, and I've come up fucking empty." 1886 01:24:47,500 --> 01:24:51,167 ♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 1887 01:24:51,250 --> 01:24:53,042 -♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪ -GEORGE: Gertie, Gertie. 1888 01:24:53,125 --> 01:24:54,792 Good girl. Yes. 1889 01:24:54,876 --> 01:24:58,626 The movie star Gertie. Oh, you is a good girl. 1890 01:24:58,709 --> 01:25:01,667 I know you want to say, "Is he goofy?" 1891 01:25:01,751 --> 01:25:05,042 SALLY: People have different aspects of themselves. 1892 01:25:05,125 --> 01:25:07,334 And they have different identities. 1893 01:25:07,417 --> 01:25:09,167 GEORGE: Gertrude says, "I got to go now. 1894 01:25:09,250 --> 01:25:10,959 I got business downtown." 1895 01:25:11,042 --> 01:25:14,292 He would express all this anger on stage, 1896 01:25:14,375 --> 01:25:18,959 and then walk off. That's it. 1897 01:25:19,042 --> 01:25:22,125 That's my anger. Here's a big pile of it. 1898 01:25:22,209 --> 01:25:24,042 You guys deal with it. 1899 01:25:24,125 --> 01:25:26,250 I'll be your guide to this tape. 1900 01:25:26,334 --> 01:25:28,250 One of the patients here has been wanting me 1901 01:25:28,334 --> 01:25:30,250 to make a tape for a long time. 1902 01:25:30,334 --> 01:25:33,042 A lot of people like to say he got bitter when he was old 1903 01:25:33,125 --> 01:25:34,667 and all that shit. 1904 01:25:34,751 --> 01:25:39,250 Bullshit. He got tired of the fucking people, 1905 01:25:39,334 --> 01:25:41,375 the fucking stupidity, 1906 01:25:41,459 --> 01:25:48,000 and the just hopelessness of expecting anything from them. 1907 01:25:48,083 --> 01:25:50,500 He gave up. He gave up. 1908 01:25:50,584 --> 01:25:54,167 I'm not a shrink. (CHUCKLES) I'm not a fucking shrink, 1909 01:25:54,250 --> 01:26:00,417 but I sensed the disappointment in the human race. 1910 01:26:01,417 --> 01:26:05,125 And it hurt him, I'm sure. 1911 01:26:08,209 --> 01:26:10,834 KELLY: It was rare moments in our life 1912 01:26:10,918 --> 01:26:16,417 when he would be settled, fully present, 1913 01:26:16,500 --> 01:26:20,083 but we had these breakfasts we would have, 1914 01:26:20,167 --> 01:26:22,083 and he would put the world aside. 1915 01:26:23,500 --> 01:26:25,167 I'd been wrestling a lot 1916 01:26:25,250 --> 01:26:29,709 with his darker take on humanity. 1917 01:26:29,792 --> 01:26:32,000 And, I finally just said to him, I said, 1918 01:26:32,083 --> 01:26:34,042 "Dad, if you've really given up, 1919 01:26:34,959 --> 01:26:37,709 then why the fuck do you get on stage? 1920 01:26:37,792 --> 01:26:40,459 Why do you bother? Like, really? 1921 01:26:40,542 --> 01:26:43,792 Like, is this just an ego thing? Like, is this just about you 1922 01:26:43,876 --> 01:26:47,125 "satisfying yourself? Clearly not." 1923 01:26:47,209 --> 01:26:50,209 And I felt like he had to fess up to me. 1924 01:26:50,292 --> 01:26:54,083 He was like, "You know, you've got me there." 1925 01:26:56,542 --> 01:27:00,125 I really believe that he was always 1926 01:27:00,209 --> 01:27:02,876 trying to be in service of some way 1927 01:27:02,959 --> 01:27:06,959 to this species, and it is hard. It is really hard 1928 01:27:07,042 --> 01:27:09,334 keeping your heart open for that. 1929 01:27:10,626 --> 01:27:13,292 When I listen to your comedy, I don't get the feeling that, 1930 01:27:13,375 --> 01:27:16,417 you know, that you have that no hope thing. 1931 01:27:16,500 --> 01:27:17,918 -I get just the opposite. -GEORGE: Really? 1932 01:27:18,000 --> 01:27:19,709 HOST: I think you've got a big defense thing going 1933 01:27:19,792 --> 01:27:22,000 because you really are the hopeful guy. 1934 01:27:22,083 --> 01:27:24,417 I think you really are the guy who really believes 1935 01:27:24,500 --> 01:27:26,375 -all the good of humanity. -I do that. I do that. 1936 01:27:26,459 --> 01:27:29,042 -HOST: I know. It's all the opposite of what you think. -I believe as an individual. 1937 01:27:29,125 --> 01:27:30,209 HOST: You're coming in a mirror way. 1938 01:27:30,292 --> 01:27:31,751 I know you're coming in the back door. 1939 01:27:31,834 --> 01:27:32,959 All comics do it, 1940 01:27:33,042 --> 01:27:36,083 but I think you are a very high spiritual person. 1941 01:27:36,167 --> 01:27:38,000 Well, they say if you scratch a cynic, 1942 01:27:38,083 --> 01:27:40,000 you'll find a disappointed idealist. 1943 01:27:40,083 --> 01:27:41,959 -HOST: Right. -And I do cop to that. 1944 01:27:42,042 --> 01:27:44,167 I am that. And you're right. 1945 01:27:44,250 --> 01:27:46,209 That's a very intelligent analysis. 1946 01:27:46,292 --> 01:27:48,000 And I've gone through that without using the words 1947 01:27:48,083 --> 01:27:49,876 you used. I've gone through that myself. 1948 01:27:49,959 --> 01:27:51,918 Thought about myself in those terms, 1949 01:27:52,000 --> 01:27:53,626 but it's more fun this way. 1950 01:28:01,209 --> 01:28:02,500 STEVEN WRIGHT: He's on the Mount Rushmore 1951 01:28:02,584 --> 01:28:05,292 of creative artists in this country. 1952 01:28:05,375 --> 01:28:06,751 Any kind of art. 1953 01:28:06,834 --> 01:28:11,083 And he was always nice. He was always very supportive. 1954 01:28:11,167 --> 01:28:13,000 You felt like he was your buddy. 1955 01:28:13,083 --> 01:28:15,125 And you were a comedian, he's a comedian. 1956 01:28:15,209 --> 01:28:17,375 You're two guys doing this thing. 1957 01:28:17,459 --> 01:28:20,959 You were in the same boat with him. You were with him. 1958 01:28:21,042 --> 01:28:23,209 He would even mail me a joke. 1959 01:28:23,292 --> 01:28:25,918 He'd write it down and mail it to me, 1960 01:28:26,000 --> 01:28:31,000 but he's like a... you know, like a great painter. 1961 01:28:31,083 --> 01:28:34,667 Like a Rembrandt of comedy. You know, there's Rembrandt 1962 01:28:34,751 --> 01:28:38,709 and then this guy's doing a postcard of a sailboat. 1963 01:28:42,125 --> 01:28:43,834 (LAUGHS) 1964 01:28:43,918 --> 01:28:46,125 GEORGE: This is workshop night for me. 1965 01:28:46,209 --> 01:28:47,751 Roll with it. Just listen to the words. 1966 01:28:47,834 --> 01:28:49,125 That's what I want you doing. 1967 01:28:49,209 --> 01:28:51,250 I'm reading and I'm kind of fucked up on where I'm going, 1968 01:28:51,334 --> 01:28:53,334 just listen to the words, because this shit, I love it, 1969 01:28:53,417 --> 01:28:55,083 but I don't know it all yet, okay? 1970 01:28:55,167 --> 01:28:56,292 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1971 01:28:56,375 --> 01:28:58,334 If you follow your heart, if you do the right thing, 1972 01:28:58,417 --> 01:28:59,918 if you do what's on your mind, 1973 01:29:00,000 --> 01:29:01,250 and in your heart, and in your brain, 1974 01:29:01,334 --> 01:29:03,167 or whatever you want to say about it, 1975 01:29:03,250 --> 01:29:06,751 good things will happen from it. Good things will come. 1976 01:29:06,834 --> 01:29:08,959 By the way, I'm not trying this stuff out on you. 1977 01:29:09,042 --> 01:29:11,250 I'm not trying it. I don't do that. 1978 01:29:11,334 --> 01:29:14,292 The audience doesn't really figure into my plans. 1979 01:29:14,375 --> 01:29:17,584 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 1980 01:29:17,667 --> 01:29:19,751 Here's the way I look at it, I'm here for me, 1981 01:29:19,834 --> 01:29:22,334 you're here for me and no one's here for you. 1982 01:29:22,417 --> 01:29:24,042 -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING) -Okay? 1983 01:29:24,125 --> 01:29:27,584 By just doing what pleased me in these shows, I had an effect. 1984 01:29:27,667 --> 01:29:30,292 The kind of effect that I can't have on people in Darfur. 1985 01:29:30,375 --> 01:29:33,792 Even if I give money, if I send all my old sweaters to Darfur, 1986 01:29:33,876 --> 01:29:35,709 it will not have the effect on them 1987 01:29:35,792 --> 01:29:37,542 that one person sitting and listening 1988 01:29:37,626 --> 01:29:38,876 when he's 12 years old, 1989 01:29:38,959 --> 01:29:40,876 and I've heard them from people of all ages, 1990 01:29:41,000 --> 01:29:42,292 and I've heard them from parents. 1991 01:29:42,375 --> 01:29:44,751 I've heard parents say, "My kid saw that show. 1992 01:29:44,834 --> 01:29:46,334 This and that. His marks got better." 1993 01:29:46,417 --> 01:29:48,542 I swear to God. I hear this kind of shit. 1994 01:29:48,626 --> 01:29:50,751 And that gave me such power. 1995 01:29:50,834 --> 01:29:53,584 I don't mean power to use, power to have. 1996 01:29:53,667 --> 01:29:57,667 Gave me such a feeling of, "Yeah, man. 1997 01:29:57,751 --> 01:30:00,792 I'm okay. I'm fucking okay." 1998 01:30:02,042 --> 01:30:04,959 DIRECTOR: Okay. We're still rolling, guys. 1999 01:30:06,667 --> 01:30:10,751 And we're in the shot. And, George. 2000 01:30:10,834 --> 01:30:13,000 Now, the last time I rolled through these parts, 2001 01:30:13,083 --> 01:30:15,334 and I do roll through with some frequency, 2002 01:30:15,417 --> 01:30:18,417 I'm a little bit like herpes, I keep coming back, 2003 01:30:18,500 --> 01:30:19,417 but since the last time 2004 01:30:19,500 --> 01:30:21,417 I might have seen some of you folks, 2005 01:30:21,500 --> 01:30:23,584 I've had my 70th birthday. 2006 01:30:23,667 --> 01:30:27,709 So I'm now 70 years old, and I like 70. 2007 01:30:27,792 --> 01:30:29,876 Not as much as I like 69. 2008 01:30:29,959 --> 01:30:32,709 Well, 69 was always my favorite number, 2009 01:30:32,792 --> 01:30:36,292 but now I figure I'm 69 with one finger up my ass. 2010 01:30:36,375 --> 01:30:37,334 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 2011 01:30:37,417 --> 01:30:39,626 GEORGE: What I am is an old fuck. 2012 01:30:39,709 --> 01:30:41,667 It's like a fat fuck. 2013 01:30:41,751 --> 01:30:44,584 Fat fuck, tall fuck, skinny fuck, short fuck, 2014 01:30:44,667 --> 01:30:46,918 but now that I'm an old fuck, I'm beginning to notice 2015 01:30:47,000 --> 01:30:50,250 there are some advantages to putting on a few extra years. 2016 01:30:50,334 --> 01:30:51,459 The first one is, 2017 01:30:51,542 --> 01:30:54,292 you never have to carry anything heavy ever again. 2018 01:30:54,375 --> 01:30:55,250 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2019 01:30:55,334 --> 01:30:58,417 Everybody wants to help an old fuck. 2020 01:30:58,500 --> 01:31:00,459 If you got a big suitcase or something like that, 2021 01:31:00,542 --> 01:31:02,375 you just kinda go like this a little bit. 2022 01:31:02,459 --> 01:31:04,083 You say, "Yeah, could you help me with this?" 2023 01:31:04,167 --> 01:31:06,417 They say, "Yeah. Hey, how far are you going?" "Indianapolis." 2024 01:31:06,500 --> 01:31:08,584 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2025 01:31:08,667 --> 01:31:12,709 I still refer to him all the time, which for a comic, 2026 01:31:12,792 --> 01:31:18,709 I mean, you know... Comedy is so ephemeral in so many ways. 2027 01:31:18,792 --> 01:31:20,626 It takes him out of the class of pop star 2028 01:31:20,709 --> 01:31:23,792 and puts him in the class of, like, Bach and Beethoven, 2029 01:31:23,876 --> 01:31:24,918 and classicists. 2030 01:31:25,000 --> 01:31:29,626 People that created something that was timeless, 2031 01:31:29,709 --> 01:31:31,667 because it wasn't based on the moment, 2032 01:31:31,751 --> 01:31:33,375 it was based on a deeper truth. 2033 01:31:33,459 --> 01:31:35,667 But the best thing about getting old is, 2034 01:31:35,751 --> 01:31:39,042 you're not responsible for remembering things anymore. 2035 01:31:39,959 --> 01:31:41,667 Even important things. 2036 01:31:41,751 --> 01:31:44,417 "But it was your daughter's funeral." 2037 01:31:44,500 --> 01:31:48,250 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2038 01:31:48,334 --> 01:31:50,626 -I forgot. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2039 01:31:50,709 --> 01:31:54,083 Oh, every time there's some weird psychopathic news story 2040 01:31:54,167 --> 01:31:55,417 that happens, people are like, 2041 01:31:55,500 --> 01:31:58,167 "Oh, I wish George Carlin were here to talk about that." 2042 01:31:58,250 --> 01:32:01,834 (CHUCKLES) It almost seems like the weirder things get in life, 2043 01:32:01,918 --> 01:32:04,000 the more you want to hear the voice of George Carlin 2044 01:32:04,083 --> 01:32:05,209 talking about it. 2045 01:32:05,292 --> 01:32:08,876 Even God can go on sensory overload. 2046 01:32:08,959 --> 01:32:12,209 That's why he wanted one day off a week. 2047 01:32:12,292 --> 01:32:16,042 Christians gave him Sunday, Jews gave him Saturday, 2048 01:32:16,125 --> 01:32:20,876 Muslims gave him Friday. God has a three-day weekend. 2049 01:32:20,959 --> 01:32:22,542 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2050 01:32:22,626 --> 01:32:23,876 I mean, we all love Lenny Bruce, 2051 01:32:23,959 --> 01:32:26,375 but nobody's sharing a Lenny Bruce bit to explain 2052 01:32:26,459 --> 01:32:28,584 anything that's happening in the culture right now. 2053 01:32:28,667 --> 01:32:30,792 You know, there's lots of comedians 2054 01:32:30,876 --> 01:32:32,334 from even ten, 15 years ago 2055 01:32:32,417 --> 01:32:34,167 where we're sort of done with their things 2056 01:32:34,250 --> 01:32:35,459 as being relevant to now. 2057 01:32:35,542 --> 01:32:37,626 There's enough bullshit as it is... 2058 01:32:37,709 --> 01:32:39,375 W. KAMAU BELL: He was still a comedian 2059 01:32:39,459 --> 01:32:41,709 that the culture as a whole cared about 2060 01:32:41,792 --> 01:32:43,709 up until his last special. 2061 01:32:43,792 --> 01:32:45,626 ...there's just enough bullshit 2062 01:32:45,709 --> 01:32:49,125 to hold things together in this country. 2063 01:32:49,209 --> 01:32:54,167 Bullshit is the glue that binds us as a nation. 2064 01:32:54,250 --> 01:32:57,167 Where would we be without our safe, 2065 01:32:57,250 --> 01:32:59,751 familiar, American bullshit? 2066 01:32:59,834 --> 01:33:00,792 ♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 2067 01:33:00,876 --> 01:33:02,083 GEORGE: America's leading industry 2068 01:33:02,167 --> 01:33:05,083 is still the manufacture, distribution, packaging 2069 01:33:05,167 --> 01:33:07,417 -and marketing of bullshit. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2070 01:33:07,500 --> 01:33:10,042 This country was founded by a group of slave owners 2071 01:33:10,125 --> 01:33:12,459 who told us that all men are created equal. 2072 01:33:12,542 --> 01:33:16,876 That is what's known as being stunningly full of shit. 2073 01:33:16,959 --> 01:33:17,959 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2074 01:33:18,042 --> 01:33:19,375 GEORGE: There's a reason education sucks, 2075 01:33:19,459 --> 01:33:21,334 and it's the same reason that it will never, 2076 01:33:21,417 --> 01:33:22,542 ever be fixed. 2077 01:33:22,626 --> 01:33:25,876 Because the owners of this country don't want that. 2078 01:33:25,959 --> 01:33:28,167 This country is owned by eight or nine hundred people 2079 01:33:28,250 --> 01:33:29,667 who run everything, do everything, 2080 01:33:29,751 --> 01:33:32,751 control everything. It's all one big ownership class 2081 01:33:32,834 --> 01:33:33,792 in this country. 2082 01:33:33,876 --> 01:33:35,125 We're led to feel free 2083 01:33:35,209 --> 01:33:37,542 by the exercise of meaningless choices. 2084 01:33:37,626 --> 01:33:40,125 Ice cream flavors, what do you want? We got 31. 2085 01:33:40,209 --> 01:33:42,626 Got the flavor of the week, got the flavor of the month. 2086 01:33:42,709 --> 01:33:45,125 But political parties, we're down to two. 2087 01:33:45,209 --> 01:33:46,834 Politicians are put there to give you the idea 2088 01:33:46,918 --> 01:33:50,542 that you have freedom of choice. You don't. You have owners. 2089 01:33:50,626 --> 01:33:51,834 They own you. 2090 01:33:51,918 --> 01:33:53,792 They own and control the corporations. 2091 01:33:53,876 --> 01:33:55,709 They've long since bought and paid for the Senate, 2092 01:33:55,792 --> 01:33:57,334 the Congress, the state houses, the city halls. 2093 01:33:57,417 --> 01:33:59,209 They got the judges in their back pockets, 2094 01:33:59,292 --> 01:34:00,876 and they own all the big media companies, 2095 01:34:00,959 --> 01:34:02,542 so they control just about all of the news 2096 01:34:02,626 --> 01:34:06,250 and information you get to hear. They got you by the balls. 2097 01:34:07,459 --> 01:34:09,292 It's a big club... 2098 01:34:09,918 --> 01:34:11,626 and you ain't in it. 2099 01:34:11,709 --> 01:34:14,000 Nobody questions things in this country anymore. 2100 01:34:14,083 --> 01:34:17,709 Americans have been bought off and silenced by toys and gizmos 2101 01:34:17,792 --> 01:34:20,375 with our microwave hot dogs and plastic vomit, 2102 01:34:20,459 --> 01:34:22,667 fake dog shit, and cinnamon dental floss, 2103 01:34:22,751 --> 01:34:24,542 and lemon-scented toilet paper, 2104 01:34:24,626 --> 01:34:26,042 and sneakers with lights in the heels. 2105 01:34:26,125 --> 01:34:27,751 -♪ (UNSETTLING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -(CROWD CLAMORING) 2106 01:34:27,834 --> 01:34:29,667 GEORGE: Millions of semi-conscious Americans 2107 01:34:29,751 --> 01:34:32,083 day after day, shopping and eating. 2108 01:34:32,167 --> 01:34:33,918 It is the new national pastime. 2109 01:34:34,000 --> 01:34:36,292 Fuck baseball. It's consumption. 2110 01:34:36,375 --> 01:34:39,083 So, where do people think these politicians come from? 2111 01:34:39,167 --> 01:34:40,292 They come from American parents 2112 01:34:40,375 --> 01:34:41,709 and American families, American homes, 2113 01:34:41,792 --> 01:34:43,584 American schools, American churches, 2114 01:34:43,667 --> 01:34:45,500 American businesses, and American universities, 2115 01:34:45,584 --> 01:34:48,167 and they're elected by American citizens. 2116 01:34:48,250 --> 01:34:50,876 This is the best we can do, folks. 2117 01:34:50,959 --> 01:34:55,042 This is what we have to offer. It's what our system produces. 2118 01:34:55,125 --> 01:34:58,250 -Garbage in, garbage out. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2119 01:34:58,334 --> 01:35:00,209 GEORGE: If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, 2120 01:35:00,292 --> 01:35:02,334 you're going to get selfish, ignorant leaders. 2121 01:35:02,417 --> 01:35:03,542 Machine gun bacon. 2122 01:35:03,626 --> 01:35:05,042 GEORGE: That's what the owners count on. 2123 01:35:05,125 --> 01:35:08,959 They want obedient workers. People who are just smart enough 2124 01:35:09,042 --> 01:35:10,834 to run the machines and do the paperwork, 2125 01:35:10,918 --> 01:35:13,459 and just dumb enough to passively accept 2126 01:35:13,542 --> 01:35:15,500 all these increasingly shittier jobs 2127 01:35:15,584 --> 01:35:17,042 with the lower pay, the longer hours, 2128 01:35:17,125 --> 01:35:19,292 the reduced benefits, the end of overtime 2129 01:35:19,375 --> 01:35:22,125 and now, they want your fucking retirement money. 2130 01:35:22,209 --> 01:35:23,959 -They want it back. -(AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 2131 01:35:24,042 --> 01:35:25,626 So they can give it to their criminal friends 2132 01:35:25,709 --> 01:35:27,709 -on Wall Street. -♪ (MUSIC BUILDS) ♪ 2133 01:35:27,792 --> 01:35:29,125 GEORGE: Of course, there's a reason why 2134 01:35:29,209 --> 01:35:30,167 we're all drugged. 2135 01:35:30,250 --> 01:35:31,584 The drug companies want it that way. 2136 01:35:31,667 --> 01:35:33,375 The drug industry has us taking things to get awake, 2137 01:35:33,459 --> 01:35:35,209 things to go to sleep, things to pep up, 2138 01:35:35,292 --> 01:35:37,250 things to forget about the grief you had from something. 2139 01:35:37,334 --> 01:35:38,626 "There's a drug problem in this country." 2140 01:35:38,709 --> 01:35:40,125 Where do you hear that? At the drugstore. 2141 01:35:40,209 --> 01:35:41,459 -(ALL LAUGH) -(MISSILE BLASTS) 2142 01:35:41,542 --> 01:35:43,167 GEORGE: You don't have to be a political scientist 2143 01:35:43,250 --> 01:35:46,209 to see the bigger dick foreign policy theory at work. 2144 01:35:46,292 --> 01:35:47,667 It goes something like this, 2145 01:35:47,751 --> 01:35:49,792 "What? They have bigger dicks? Bomb them." 2146 01:35:49,876 --> 01:35:53,500 -(AUDIENCE CHEERING) -(BOMB BLASTS) 2147 01:35:53,584 --> 01:35:55,125 GEORGE: That's our new job in the world, 2148 01:35:55,209 --> 01:35:56,751 bombing Brown people. 2149 01:35:56,834 --> 01:35:58,959 Isn't that roughly our job everywhere? 2150 01:35:59,042 --> 01:36:01,334 We kind of free people and whip industry on them 2151 01:36:01,417 --> 01:36:03,792 so that they can have all the benefits of industry 2152 01:36:03,876 --> 01:36:05,542 that we have come to love. 2153 01:36:05,626 --> 01:36:07,125 Wasn't there something noble they could do 2154 01:36:07,209 --> 01:36:09,000 to be helping this planet heal? 2155 01:36:09,083 --> 01:36:12,751 Mother Earth raped again. Guess who. 2156 01:36:12,834 --> 01:36:14,584 Hey, she was asking for it. 2157 01:36:14,667 --> 01:36:16,876 You know there's another bunch of homeless coming soon 2158 01:36:16,959 --> 01:36:19,125 when the housing bubble bursts and the dollar gets devalued, 2159 01:36:19,209 --> 01:36:20,626 and you get a lot of middle class homeless... 2160 01:36:20,709 --> 01:36:22,959 I said a long time ago, when fascism comes to America, 2161 01:36:23,042 --> 01:36:24,792 it won't wear jackboots and brown shirts. 2162 01:36:24,876 --> 01:36:27,125 It'll have on a smiley face and a T-shirt 2163 01:36:27,209 --> 01:36:29,125 and designer jeans and Nikes. 2164 01:36:29,209 --> 01:36:30,584 CROWD: (CHANTING) Black lives matter! 2165 01:36:30,667 --> 01:36:31,834 GEORGE: You know what they ought to do? 2166 01:36:31,918 --> 01:36:33,417 They ought to have two new requirements 2167 01:36:33,500 --> 01:36:37,000 for being on the police. Intelligence and decency. 2168 01:36:37,083 --> 01:36:38,250 (POLICE SIREN WAILING) 2169 01:36:38,334 --> 01:36:40,167 GEORGE: You never can tell. It might just work. 2170 01:36:40,250 --> 01:36:42,584 It certainly hasn't been tried yet. 2171 01:36:42,667 --> 01:36:44,626 -Come on! You're full of shit! -(SCREAMS) 2172 01:36:44,709 --> 01:36:46,792 CROWD: Black lives matter! Black lives matter! 2173 01:36:46,876 --> 01:36:48,709 GEORGE: That's all you ever hear about in this country, 2174 01:36:48,792 --> 01:36:51,959 is our differences. Race, religion, sexuality. 2175 01:36:52,042 --> 01:36:54,709 That's the way the ruling class operates in any society. 2176 01:36:54,792 --> 01:36:57,042 They try to divide the rest of the people. 2177 01:36:57,125 --> 01:36:59,375 Anything they can do to keep us fighting with each other 2178 01:36:59,459 --> 01:37:01,959 so that they can keep going to the bank. 2179 01:37:02,042 --> 01:37:03,500 (INDISTINCT CHANTING) 2180 01:37:03,584 --> 01:37:05,584 GEORGE: But I'll tell you what they don't want. 2181 01:37:05,667 --> 01:37:07,542 They don't want a population of citizens 2182 01:37:07,626 --> 01:37:10,334 capable of critical thinking. They're not interested in that. 2183 01:37:10,417 --> 01:37:13,500 That doesn't help them. That's against their interests. 2184 01:37:15,876 --> 01:37:17,167 They don't give a fuck about you. 2185 01:37:17,250 --> 01:37:18,834 They don't give a fuck about you. 2186 01:37:18,918 --> 01:37:21,626 They don't care about you at all. At all. 2187 01:37:21,709 --> 01:37:24,834 The table is tilted, folks. The game is rigged. 2188 01:37:24,918 --> 01:37:26,792 (GRUNTS, SHOUTS) 2189 01:37:26,876 --> 01:37:28,709 GEORGE: Land of the free. Home of the brave. 2190 01:37:28,792 --> 01:37:30,751 -(OFFICER SCREAMING) -GEORGE: All men are equal. 2191 01:37:30,834 --> 01:37:32,959 -OFFICER: (SCREAMING) Help! -GEORGE: Justice is blind. 2192 01:37:33,042 --> 01:37:36,250 -The good guys win. -CROWD: USA! USA! 2193 01:37:36,334 --> 01:37:39,209 GEORGE: And everything is going to be just fine. 2194 01:37:39,292 --> 01:37:42,584 CROWD: USA! USA! USA! 2195 01:37:42,667 --> 01:37:49,125 ♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪ 2196 01:37:53,626 --> 01:37:55,459 GEORGE: It's called the American dream 2197 01:37:55,542 --> 01:37:58,375 because you have to be asleep to believe it. 2198 01:37:58,459 --> 01:38:00,250 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ 2199 01:38:08,042 --> 01:38:12,876 (WAVES CRASHING) 2200 01:38:12,959 --> 01:38:15,209 KELLY: My last memory of my dad is, 2201 01:38:15,292 --> 01:38:20,250 I went to Hawaii and I drive up to the Napili Kai, 2202 01:38:20,334 --> 01:38:25,542 which is where I had my parents sign the UN peace treaty. 2203 01:38:25,626 --> 01:38:29,459 And there's no angst there, there's no chaos, 2204 01:38:29,542 --> 01:38:32,918 there's no bad memories. It's just pure, pure love. 2205 01:38:34,125 --> 01:38:37,667 So I call my dad, and my dad never picks up his phone, 2206 01:38:37,751 --> 01:38:39,751 and he picks up the phone, 2207 01:38:39,834 --> 01:38:42,709 and he says, "Hey, kiddo." I'm like, "Hey, Dad, 2208 01:38:42,792 --> 01:38:49,167 I was just at the Napili Kai, and I want to tell you that 2209 01:38:49,250 --> 01:38:52,375 everything that happened to us 40 years ago, 2210 01:38:52,459 --> 01:38:55,626 all the pieces of ourselves that we left there, 2211 01:38:55,709 --> 01:38:57,667 I've brought them home, 2212 01:38:57,751 --> 01:39:02,000 and it's done, and it's really, really over, Dad. 2213 01:39:02,083 --> 01:39:04,083 It's done. There's no more. 2214 01:39:05,250 --> 01:39:07,250 There's no more pain inside of me about this 2215 01:39:07,334 --> 01:39:10,125 "or suffering or any of that." 2216 01:39:10,209 --> 01:39:12,209 I can tell my dad's very choked up 2217 01:39:12,292 --> 01:39:14,876 on the other end of the phone. He can barely speak. 2218 01:39:15,918 --> 01:39:18,250 And, um, and he's like, 2219 01:39:18,334 --> 01:39:21,918 "That's... that's great." You know. 2220 01:39:22,000 --> 01:39:25,417 And it was one of these moments, it was just incredible. 2221 01:39:25,500 --> 01:39:28,000 I'd felt like on the phone with my dad... 2222 01:39:30,459 --> 01:39:32,751 like we had met each other in this place 2223 01:39:32,834 --> 01:39:35,709 that we had never met each other before. 2224 01:39:35,792 --> 01:39:37,709 And I knew this was so important to him 2225 01:39:37,792 --> 01:39:40,209 because I knew the biggest regret he had 2226 01:39:40,292 --> 01:39:42,459 of his entire life about everything 2227 01:39:42,542 --> 01:39:45,042 was what those years did to me. 2228 01:39:45,125 --> 01:39:48,125 And, we had this beautiful conversation. 2229 01:39:48,209 --> 01:39:51,042 ♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 2230 01:39:51,125 --> 01:39:54,542 SALLY: He was going into the hospital early on a Sunday. 2231 01:39:55,167 --> 01:39:57,083 He wasn't feeling bad. 2232 01:39:57,167 --> 01:40:01,209 He was just going in to get an adjustment for his heart. 2233 01:40:04,667 --> 01:40:07,083 And then the hospital called me... (SNIFFLES) 2234 01:40:07,167 --> 01:40:10,834 ...and said... (CLEARS THROAT) 2235 01:40:11,834 --> 01:40:13,167 ..."Come in as soon as you can." 2236 01:40:14,918 --> 01:40:20,000 And, uh... he kept telling me he was sorry. 2237 01:40:22,000 --> 01:40:26,876 Which he didn't have to do. He didn't have to apologize. 2238 01:40:28,751 --> 01:40:31,375 And, then he stopped breathing. 2239 01:40:31,459 --> 01:40:32,834 ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪ 2240 01:40:34,459 --> 01:40:36,042 ♪ (AMBIENT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 2241 01:40:36,125 --> 01:40:40,500 GEORGE: Uh, y'all people, this is the afterlife sergeant. 2242 01:40:40,584 --> 01:40:42,000 A couple of notes for you. 2243 01:40:42,083 --> 01:40:44,709 Just things where people are curious about. 2244 01:40:44,792 --> 01:40:47,167 Hitler. Hitler is in heaven. 2245 01:40:47,250 --> 01:40:50,542 Listen, don't blame me. I don't make the rules. 2246 01:40:50,626 --> 01:40:52,417 Technically, he was a Catholic. 2247 01:40:52,500 --> 01:40:55,834 He got absolution before he died. 2248 01:40:55,918 --> 01:40:57,209 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 2249 01:40:57,292 --> 01:41:01,876 Yes, you're all... you're all going to die. 2250 01:41:01,959 --> 01:41:04,584 Didn't mean to remind you of it, but it is on your schedule. 2251 01:41:04,667 --> 01:41:07,250 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2252 01:41:07,334 --> 01:41:09,709 Comedians don't want to die. 2253 01:41:09,792 --> 01:41:12,375 It's only a metaphor, but it's so true of all of us. 2254 01:41:12,459 --> 01:41:16,125 We don't want to die out there. The comics wanna die. 2255 01:41:16,209 --> 01:41:18,626 I don't want to die. Geez, I was dying out there. 2256 01:41:18,709 --> 01:41:19,751 (AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2257 01:41:19,834 --> 01:41:21,959 Of course, if the comedian doesn't die, 2258 01:41:22,042 --> 01:41:24,375 you know, if he succeeds, 2259 01:41:24,459 --> 01:41:28,459 if he makes you laugh, then he can say, 2260 01:41:28,542 --> 01:41:32,792 -"I killed them." -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2261 01:41:33,834 --> 01:41:37,500 -"I killed them." -(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 2262 01:41:37,584 --> 01:41:39,792 So it's either me or you, you know? 2263 01:41:41,417 --> 01:41:43,250 See, I don't worry about the little things. 2264 01:41:43,334 --> 01:41:45,500 I think we're part of a greater wisdom 2265 01:41:45,584 --> 01:41:47,626 than we will ever understand. 2266 01:41:47,709 --> 01:41:50,042 A higher order. Call it what you want. 2267 01:41:50,125 --> 01:41:53,167 You know what I call it? The big electron. 2268 01:41:53,876 --> 01:41:57,250 The big electron. Whoa. 2269 01:41:57,334 --> 01:42:01,417 -Whoa. Whoa. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING) 2270 01:42:01,500 --> 01:42:04,000 It doesn't punish. It doesn't reward. 2271 01:42:04,083 --> 01:42:05,459 It doesn't judge at all. 2272 01:42:05,542 --> 01:42:09,459 It just is, and so are we, for a little while. 2273 01:42:09,542 --> 01:42:12,167 Thanks for being here with me for a little while tonight. 2274 01:42:12,250 --> 01:42:14,167 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 2275 01:42:14,250 --> 01:42:18,042 Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. 2276 01:42:18,125 --> 01:42:24,083 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 2277 01:42:24,167 --> 01:42:28,292 GEORGE: Take care of yourself. Take care of yourself, 2278 01:42:28,375 --> 01:42:31,667 and take care of somebody else. Thank you. Goodnight. 2279 01:42:31,751 --> 01:42:38,542 (AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING) 2280 01:42:43,417 --> 01:42:46,500 ♪ ("BRING ON THE LUCIE" BY JOHN LENNON PLAYING) ♪ 2281 01:42:49,834 --> 01:42:53,000 ♪ We don't care What flag you're waving ♪ 2282 01:42:55,751 --> 01:42:58,834 ♪ We don't even Want to know your name ♪ 2283 01:43:01,500 --> 01:43:03,167 ♪ We don't care Where you're from ♪ 2284 01:43:03,250 --> 01:43:04,667 ♪ Or where you're going ♪ 2285 01:43:07,375 --> 01:43:10,334 ♪ All we know it that you came ♪ 2286 01:43:13,042 --> 01:43:18,626 -♪ Free the people now ♪ -♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2287 01:43:18,709 --> 01:43:22,209 ♪ Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it now ♪ 2288 01:43:22,292 --> 01:43:24,542 ♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2289 01:43:24,626 --> 01:43:29,876 -♪ Free the people now ♪ -♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2290 01:43:29,959 --> 01:43:32,709 ♪ Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it now ♪ 2291 01:43:35,334 --> 01:43:38,959 ♪ Well, we were caught With our hands in the air ♪ 2292 01:43:39,042 --> 01:43:41,959 ♪ Don't despair, Paranoia's everywhere ♪ 2293 01:43:42,042 --> 01:43:44,709 ♪ We can shake it with love When we're scared ♪ 2294 01:43:44,792 --> 01:43:47,292 ♪ So let's shout it aloud Like a prayer ♪ 2295 01:43:47,375 --> 01:43:52,709 -♪ Free the people now ♪ -♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2296 01:43:52,792 --> 01:43:56,375 ♪ Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it now ♪ 2297 01:43:56,459 --> 01:43:58,751 ♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2298 01:43:58,834 --> 01:44:04,083 -♪ Free the people now ♪ -♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2299 01:44:04,167 --> 01:44:07,834 ♪ Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it now ♪ 2300 01:44:10,125 --> 01:44:13,167 ♪ We understand your paranoia ♪ 2301 01:44:15,834 --> 01:44:19,584 ♪ But we don't wanna Play your game ♪ 2302 01:44:21,584 --> 01:44:25,459 ♪ You think you're cool And know what you're doing ♪ 2303 01:44:27,459 --> 01:44:31,334 ♪ 666 is your name ♪ 2304 01:44:33,250 --> 01:44:38,626 -♪ Free the people now ♪ -♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2305 01:44:38,709 --> 01:44:42,417 ♪ Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it now ♪ 2306 01:44:42,500 --> 01:44:44,500 ♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2307 01:44:44,584 --> 01:44:47,626 -♪ Free the people now ♪ -♪ Do it, do it, do it ♪ 2308 01:44:47,709 --> 01:44:49,125 ♪ (SONG CONCLUDES) ♪ 2308 01:44:50,305 --> 01:45:50,758 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/a3kde Help other users to choose the best subtitles