1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:00,100 --> 00:00:04,600 Sync and corrections by into-the-light, www.MY-SUBS.com 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:08,803 - ( Cell phone chimes ) - Hannah: Oh, my God. 3 00:00:09,973 --> 00:00:11,942 Oh, my God. 4 00:00:11,976 --> 00:00:15,079 - Oh, my God. - What? What's up? 5 00:00:21,923 --> 00:00:23,958 Oh, my God. 6 00:00:23,993 --> 00:00:26,294 ( Laughs ) What is this? 7 00:00:26,329 --> 00:00:28,864 - Charlie: What's going on? - Oh, my God. 8 00:00:31,067 --> 00:00:33,937 Oh, my God! That's a dick. 9 00:00:33,971 --> 00:00:36,072 Somebody please explain this to me. 10 00:00:36,107 --> 00:00:38,742 That's a semi-hard dick with a squirrel's skin 11 00:00:38,776 --> 00:00:40,644 wrapped around it. 12 00:00:40,678 --> 00:00:43,648 Adam just texted that to me. 13 00:00:43,683 --> 00:00:45,884 I have no words. 14 00:00:45,918 --> 00:00:47,786 I am sorry that I woke you up, but... 15 00:00:47,820 --> 00:00:49,990 are you kidding? I'm so glad you woke us up. 16 00:00:50,024 --> 00:00:52,693 - This is mental. - That is a big dick. 17 00:00:52,728 --> 00:00:54,328 How can you tell? It's so close up. 18 00:00:54,362 --> 00:00:56,630 You need, like, more context to know how big the dick is. 19 00:00:56,665 --> 00:00:58,299 No, trust me. I can tell. 20 00:00:58,333 --> 00:01:00,301 I feel like I can smell it through the phone. 21 00:01:00,335 --> 00:01:02,637 You never send me dick pics. 22 00:01:02,672 --> 00:01:04,606 - Do you want one? - No. 23 00:01:04,641 --> 00:01:07,677 Ew. ( Laughs ) 24 00:01:07,711 --> 00:01:09,612 - ( Cell phone chimes ) - Oh. 25 00:01:09,646 --> 00:01:12,014 - It's him. - Oh, my God. 26 00:01:12,049 --> 00:01:15,017 I don't... it's probably, like, his asshole wearing a friendship bracelet. 27 00:01:15,051 --> 00:01:16,585 - ( Laughs ) - It's a text. 28 00:01:16,620 --> 00:01:19,889 It says, "sorry, that wasn't for you." 29 00:01:21,625 --> 00:01:25,160 "Sorry" is spelled s-r-y and in capitals. 30 00:01:25,195 --> 00:01:27,997 What are you doing? Don't respond to that. 31 00:01:28,031 --> 00:01:29,398 Why not? 32 00:01:29,433 --> 00:01:30,900 Because he basically just told you 33 00:01:30,935 --> 00:01:33,069 that picture of his penis is meant for another girl. 34 00:01:33,104 --> 00:01:34,972 He never mentioned a girl. 35 00:01:35,007 --> 00:01:37,042 You're smarter than this, Hannah. 36 00:01:37,076 --> 00:01:38,476 Okay, if there was another girl, 37 00:01:38,511 --> 00:01:40,212 he would never be this obvious about it. 38 00:01:40,246 --> 00:01:42,281 Yes, he would. He's a noted psychopath. 39 00:01:42,315 --> 00:01:44,850 - You don't know. You've never met him. - No one has. 40 00:01:44,885 --> 00:01:47,120 This is the first evidence of his existence. 41 00:01:47,154 --> 00:01:48,688 Okay, what would you write? 44 00:01:52,594 --> 00:01:54,495 Or just ask him if you can borrow his dick 45 00:01:54,529 --> 00:01:56,998 - to club some baby seals. - ( All laugh ) 46 00:01:57,032 --> 00:01:58,466 Do not respond. 47 00:01:58,501 --> 00:02:00,569 Just trust me on this one. 48 00:02:00,603 --> 00:02:02,938 Don't respond. 49 00:02:06,743 --> 00:02:10,680 Do not respond. 50 00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:14,451 - Good night. - Good night. 51 00:02:14,485 --> 00:02:16,386 ( Door closes ) 52 00:02:17,288 --> 00:02:19,456 ( Music playing ) 53 00:02:31,870 --> 00:02:33,071 ( Clicks ) 54 00:02:33,105 --> 00:02:37,109 ( Theme music playing ) 55 00:02:48,288 --> 00:02:50,189 Man: Hannah. 56 00:02:52,726 --> 00:02:55,394 What are we gonna do with you? 57 00:02:55,429 --> 00:02:57,029 I really apologize. 58 00:02:57,063 --> 00:02:58,631 I thought I had a better handle on windows, 59 00:02:58,665 --> 00:03:01,433 and I am more of a Mac girl, but if you give me an hour with the manual... 60 00:03:01,467 --> 00:03:04,470 I'm just giving you a hard time. I know you'll get there. 61 00:03:04,504 --> 00:03:07,672 Thank you so much. 62 00:03:07,707 --> 00:03:10,008 "Work with the chart wizard." 63 00:03:10,042 --> 00:03:11,843 You look tense. 64 00:03:11,877 --> 00:03:14,712 Oh, no, I'm good. I'm just a hunchy person naturally. 65 00:03:16,081 --> 00:03:18,248 Mm. 66 00:03:18,282 --> 00:03:21,651 - Thank you. - ( Sighs ) 67 00:03:23,554 --> 00:03:27,289 Okay, now, just lean into the pain. 68 00:03:27,324 --> 00:03:30,760 My wife and I took a Reiki healing course at Club Med. 69 00:03:30,794 --> 00:03:33,429 - Fascinating stuff. - Uh... 70 00:03:33,464 --> 00:03:34,898 okay. 71 00:03:34,932 --> 00:03:37,401 You need to sit up a bit straighter. 72 00:03:37,435 --> 00:03:39,836 Yeah, my mom tells me that all the time. 73 00:03:39,871 --> 00:03:42,306 And open up the solar plexus. 74 00:03:43,208 --> 00:03:46,611 And just breathe. 75 00:03:46,645 --> 00:03:48,780 - You feel that? - Hannah: I do. 76 00:03:48,814 --> 00:03:50,582 Man: Oh, much better. Much better. 77 00:03:50,616 --> 00:03:53,318 That's really much better. 78 00:03:53,353 --> 00:03:55,654 Shoshanna: 'Cause it's like an exclamation point 79 00:03:55,688 --> 00:03:58,992 next to "hi" makes it, like, a little bit overeager, 80 00:03:59,026 --> 00:04:00,560 but, like, a period is kind of okay... 81 00:04:00,595 --> 00:04:03,130 you know what the weirdest part about having a job is? 82 00:04:03,164 --> 00:04:05,933 Um, I'm... no, I'm a student. 83 00:04:05,968 --> 00:04:07,968 You have to be there every day, 84 00:04:08,002 --> 00:04:09,736 even on the days you don't feel like it. 85 00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:12,239 - Do you not feel like it today? - Today's fine. 86 00:04:12,273 --> 00:04:14,441 I just don't know how I'll feel tomorrow. 87 00:04:14,476 --> 00:04:17,344 Shoshanna. Hey, you remember me? 88 00:04:17,378 --> 00:04:19,212 It's Matt, Matt Kornstein. 89 00:04:19,246 --> 00:04:21,113 Camp Ramah. 90 00:04:21,148 --> 00:04:22,848 Y-yeah, hi. 91 00:04:22,883 --> 00:04:25,885 You led the most intense kitchen raid I ever saw 92 00:04:25,919 --> 00:04:27,920 in my time as a junior counselor. 93 00:04:27,954 --> 00:04:30,589 That was pretty intense. 94 00:04:30,624 --> 00:04:33,625 No, it was the most intense. 95 00:04:33,660 --> 00:04:35,994 We planned it for, like, weeks, but... 96 00:04:36,028 --> 00:04:37,762 It was really awesome. 97 00:04:37,797 --> 00:04:39,664 You know... 98 00:04:42,134 --> 00:04:45,169 Okay, I'm gonna leave you guys to... 99 00:04:45,203 --> 00:04:47,404 Whatever this is. 100 00:04:49,207 --> 00:04:52,609 Yeah, but didn't you go home early that summer? Like, what was with that? 101 00:04:52,644 --> 00:04:55,346 Because I think I heard a rumor that you tried to kill yourself 102 00:04:55,380 --> 00:04:57,348 by sucking all the air out of a raft. 103 00:04:57,382 --> 00:04:58,616 No way. 104 00:04:58,651 --> 00:05:00,318 Okay, I'm anxious, not depressed. 105 00:05:00,352 --> 00:05:01,719 I did that on a dare. 106 00:05:01,753 --> 00:05:03,588 ( Laughs ) Oh. 107 00:05:03,623 --> 00:05:05,056 I will never forget the time that you saved 108 00:05:05,090 --> 00:05:06,424 that girl who was stuck between two kayaks. 109 00:05:06,458 --> 00:05:08,059 Oh, yeah. A leg in each kayak... 110 00:05:08,093 --> 00:05:10,194 you can die that way. 111 00:05:10,229 --> 00:05:12,230 Like, seriously, you can split your ass. 112 00:05:12,264 --> 00:05:13,665 ( Laughs ) 113 00:05:13,699 --> 00:05:16,034 Totally. 114 00:05:17,069 --> 00:05:19,904 - We should hang out. - Yeah. 115 00:05:19,939 --> 00:05:21,739 Um, I... I kind of have class right now, 116 00:05:21,774 --> 00:05:23,274 but I could, like, totally cancel it. 117 00:05:23,309 --> 00:05:25,143 - Like tonight. - Okay. 118 00:05:25,177 --> 00:05:29,747 - Yeah, we should hang out tonight. - Um... yeah. 119 00:05:29,782 --> 00:05:33,885 ( Toilet flushes ) 120 00:05:33,919 --> 00:05:35,920 - Hey, Lesley. - Hey, Hannah. 121 00:05:35,954 --> 00:05:37,655 How's your first week going? 122 00:05:37,689 --> 00:05:39,790 It's good. It's been good. 123 00:05:39,825 --> 00:05:41,992 Listen, I'm just wondering if there was anything specific 124 00:05:42,026 --> 00:05:43,794 you thought I should know about rich. 125 00:05:43,828 --> 00:05:46,029 Mm. He touch you? 126 00:05:46,063 --> 00:05:49,899 Yeah. Like my breasts a little bit. 127 00:05:49,934 --> 00:05:53,102 I know. Rich massaged Hannah. 128 00:05:53,137 --> 00:05:55,471 Oh, yeah? You'll get used to it. 129 00:05:55,505 --> 00:05:57,039 What? 130 00:05:57,073 --> 00:05:59,441 Look, I know it's gross, but he's really nice 131 00:05:59,475 --> 00:06:01,609 and he got Tommy health insurance. 132 00:06:01,644 --> 00:06:04,779 He doesn't complain if I come in or if I don't and stuff. 133 00:06:04,813 --> 00:06:08,349 And he paid for my sister to go to camp. 134 00:06:08,383 --> 00:06:10,551 Oh, and he got me an iPod for my birthday. 135 00:06:10,586 --> 00:06:12,954 - That was very nice of him. - I know. It's a Nano. 136 00:06:12,989 --> 00:06:14,956 So you've never said anything to him about it? 137 00:06:14,991 --> 00:06:17,326 - No, never. - Why? 138 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:19,228 Wow. 139 00:06:19,263 --> 00:06:22,832 - Okay. - Oh, my God. 140 00:06:22,867 --> 00:06:25,135 - What happened to your eyebrows? - My eyebrows? 141 00:06:25,169 --> 00:06:28,071 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah, they're really, really patchy. 142 00:06:28,105 --> 00:06:29,639 Oh, well, I plucked them all out in eighth grade 143 00:06:29,673 --> 00:06:31,374 and I feel like they just grew back differently. 144 00:06:31,408 --> 00:06:34,409 Here, let me... let me see something. 145 00:06:34,443 --> 00:06:35,944 I'm gonna do something with them, okay? 146 00:06:35,978 --> 00:06:37,512 Yeah, she's gonna make them good. 147 00:06:37,546 --> 00:06:40,048 Wow, your eyelids are oily, really oily. 148 00:06:40,082 --> 00:06:41,416 - Yeah. - Have you noticed that? 149 00:06:41,450 --> 00:06:44,018 - No. What would that be from? - Probably your diet. 150 00:06:44,053 --> 00:06:46,588 - Yeah. You eat salad? - Um, y-yes. 151 00:06:46,622 --> 00:06:48,255 Vegetables, lots of vegetables, right? 152 00:06:48,290 --> 00:06:50,457 - You're a vegetarian? - I was. I'm not anymore. 153 00:06:50,492 --> 00:06:52,226 I can tell you're a vegetarian. It's okay. 154 00:06:52,260 --> 00:06:54,761 - Lesley: You know what's good for your skin? - What? 155 00:06:54,796 --> 00:06:56,864 - Sugar. - Mm-hmm. Brown sugar. 156 00:06:56,898 --> 00:06:58,365 No, white sugar. 157 00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:01,369 - ( Banging ) - Right? So, I mean, the melody was... 158 00:07:01,403 --> 00:07:04,305 ♪ Oh, wherere you going... ♪ 159 00:07:04,339 --> 00:07:06,874 ( Imitates drums ) 160 00:07:06,909 --> 00:07:08,743 ♪ In those keds? ♪ 161 00:07:08,778 --> 00:07:10,378 And then I would just sing that twice 162 00:07:10,412 --> 00:07:12,047 and then you would help me out on the... 163 00:07:12,081 --> 00:07:14,549 sing along with me on the... ♪ in those keds? ♪ 164 00:07:14,583 --> 00:07:16,785 - On the last one? Just the last one, right? - Yeah. 165 00:07:16,820 --> 00:07:19,288 Both: ♪ in those keds? ♪ 166 00:07:19,323 --> 00:07:22,192 Nice. Maybe I'll do a little, shh, rubout on the bongos. 167 00:07:22,226 --> 00:07:24,595 - Yeah. That's beautiful. - Yeah. 168 00:07:24,629 --> 00:07:27,097 And are you comfortable... like, does the concept of the song... 169 00:07:27,131 --> 00:07:28,865 is that clear to you? 170 00:07:28,899 --> 00:07:32,368 You're walking behind a girl on the street and she's wearing keds. 171 00:07:32,402 --> 00:07:34,670 - Yeah, that's pretty much it. Yeah. - Right. 172 00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:37,138 Thanks for helping me with this, man. I really appreciate it. 173 00:07:37,173 --> 00:07:39,941 Marnie's been completely on edge lately 174 00:07:39,975 --> 00:07:41,876 and I just wanna surprise her with something nice. 175 00:07:41,910 --> 00:07:44,478 Mm-hmm. Like a coffee table made out of street garbage. 176 00:07:44,512 --> 00:07:47,680 Yeah, I mean, it looks like that, but it's in the style 177 00:07:47,715 --> 00:07:50,917 of this thing that she likes from restoration hardware. 178 00:07:50,952 --> 00:07:53,286 Your girlfriend is my own private nightmare. 179 00:07:53,321 --> 00:07:54,855 Do you understand that? 180 00:07:54,889 --> 00:07:57,324 Someone should just fuck her to teach her a lesson. 181 00:07:57,358 --> 00:07:59,960 - ( Banging ) - You know, just fuckin' chain her up to a post 182 00:07:59,994 --> 00:08:01,928 and just fuckin' fuck her hard. 183 00:08:01,963 --> 00:08:05,799 And just whip her. Just fuckin' whip her until she fuckin'... 184 00:08:05,833 --> 00:08:08,468 Whatever. 185 00:08:08,502 --> 00:08:10,436 But that's what I'm saying. It wasn't always like this. 186 00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:12,071 I mean, it wasn't like this in college. 187 00:08:12,105 --> 00:08:13,506 I think she's just going through 188 00:08:13,540 --> 00:08:16,375 some kind of temporary adjustment into adult life. 189 00:08:16,409 --> 00:08:19,111 It's not adult life if your parents pay for your BlackBerry. 190 00:08:19,145 --> 00:08:20,812 She pays for half of her BlackBerry. 191 00:08:20,847 --> 00:08:22,647 Bullshit. 192 00:08:25,017 --> 00:08:26,785 Where are you going? 193 00:08:26,819 --> 00:08:28,453 Well, we've never been in the girl apartment 194 00:08:28,487 --> 00:08:30,055 without the girls being here, right? 195 00:08:30,089 --> 00:08:32,391 There's no way I'm not gonna fondle some girl stuff. 196 00:08:32,426 --> 00:08:34,827 You were late. 197 00:08:34,862 --> 00:08:36,363 What do you mean I was late? 198 00:08:36,397 --> 00:08:37,898 I was like five minutes late. 199 00:08:37,932 --> 00:08:40,334 You're such a little Nazi, you know that? 200 00:08:40,368 --> 00:08:42,903 - I just don't like school. - I know. 201 00:08:42,938 --> 00:08:44,539 Well, that's because you're not insane. 202 00:08:44,573 --> 00:08:47,575 - How was your day? - I ate my snack, but I lost my barrette. 203 00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:49,110 You smoked a pack of cigarettes? 204 00:08:49,145 --> 00:08:51,112 ( Louder ) I ate my snack, but I lost my barrette. 205 00:08:51,147 --> 00:08:53,347 Hold on. You ate a pack of cigarettes? 206 00:08:53,382 --> 00:08:55,149 Do you realize how out of line that is? 207 00:08:55,184 --> 00:08:56,717 Daddy, daddy! Terry! 208 00:08:56,752 --> 00:08:59,186 - Oh, my goodness! - Hey! Fancy meeting you here. 209 00:08:59,220 --> 00:09:00,755 What's up, you little turds? 210 00:09:00,789 --> 00:09:03,724 Monkey, so Uncle Terry just got back from... 211 00:09:03,758 --> 00:09:06,394 - rehab! - Tahoe. 212 00:09:06,428 --> 00:09:09,330 Swear to God, I told her Tahoe. 213 00:09:09,365 --> 00:09:10,765 Can we stay with you? 214 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,801 No, sweetheart, because daddy and Uncle Terry 215 00:09:12,835 --> 00:09:14,503 have to go talk about some work stuff. 216 00:09:14,571 --> 00:09:17,440 What work stuff? You don't even have a job. 217 00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:20,710 ( Ughs ) Busted. 218 00:09:20,744 --> 00:09:22,712 - Okay, come on. We're going to the park. - It's raining. 219 00:09:22,747 --> 00:09:25,615 Okay, well, a woman should know when she's not wanted. 220 00:09:25,650 --> 00:09:29,219 - All right, we'll see you later. - Girls: Bye, dad! Bye, Terry. 221 00:09:29,253 --> 00:09:32,989 Terry, don't quit before the miracle. 222 00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:36,759 Yikes. Where'd you find her? 223 00:09:36,793 --> 00:09:38,194 Back of the "village voice"? 224 00:09:38,228 --> 00:09:40,896 Katherine found her. She's great, very present. 225 00:09:40,931 --> 00:09:42,231 Present. 226 00:09:42,265 --> 00:09:43,766 Who cares if she's present? 227 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:47,036 She has the face of Brigitte Bardot and an ass like Rihanna. 228 00:09:47,070 --> 00:09:51,174 - So clean, so blond. - Yeah, they're nice. 229 00:09:51,208 --> 00:09:53,343 When you see a family like this, don't you just wonder 230 00:09:53,377 --> 00:09:57,181 - if they're all having sex with each other? - No. 231 00:09:57,215 --> 00:09:59,917 Just locking the doors, drawing the curtains, 232 00:09:59,951 --> 00:10:01,452 and just plowing through the family tree? 233 00:10:01,487 --> 00:10:03,188 - ( Opens drawer ) - No, no, no, no. Come on. 234 00:10:03,222 --> 00:10:04,923 What are you doing? Stop. Stop. 235 00:10:04,957 --> 00:10:06,892 Just once in my life, I'd like to have sex 236 00:10:06,927 --> 00:10:08,694 with someone who looks like me, you know? 237 00:10:08,728 --> 00:10:11,362 Just to see what it's like, try it out. 238 00:10:11,397 --> 00:10:13,898 My sister's a fuckin' fatty. My parents are dead. 239 00:10:13,932 --> 00:10:16,066 - ( Laughs ) - So I've got nothing. 240 00:10:16,101 --> 00:10:17,834 Okay, so where have you always wanted to look 241 00:10:17,869 --> 00:10:19,268 that you've never looked before? 242 00:10:19,303 --> 00:10:22,471 I've never thought about it. Marnie's not very secretive. 243 00:10:22,506 --> 00:10:26,609 Well, we know where she keeps her vagina massager. 244 00:10:26,643 --> 00:10:29,011 Um, you mean vibrator? 245 00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,846 - ( Buzzing ) - Because that's what I call it. 246 00:10:30,881 --> 00:10:32,348 - And that's a share tool. - ( Buzzing stops ) 247 00:10:32,383 --> 00:10:34,451 ( Sniffs ) You're a share tool. 248 00:10:35,553 --> 00:10:37,154 'Kay. 249 00:10:41,627 --> 00:10:44,229 - For you, rich. - Thank you, my darling. 250 00:10:44,263 --> 00:10:46,265 - Boy, this weather, huh? - Yeah, I don't know what happened. 251 00:10:46,299 --> 00:10:47,900 It was beautiful earlier. 252 00:10:47,934 --> 00:10:50,402 Oh, well, rain, shine... what the hell? 253 00:10:50,437 --> 00:10:53,305 I'm feeling lovely today. 254 00:10:55,909 --> 00:10:58,010 Now, you'll tell me if the touching 255 00:10:58,044 --> 00:11:00,478 ever bothers you, right? 256 00:11:00,513 --> 00:11:04,281 I'm just a touchy kind of guy. 257 00:11:07,251 --> 00:11:08,785 Ray: Hello, Hannah! 258 00:11:08,819 --> 00:11:11,321 Crotchless panties. 259 00:11:11,355 --> 00:11:14,091 Nothing makes me erect faster than a girl's... 260 00:11:14,125 --> 00:11:16,926 these are holes. 261 00:11:16,961 --> 00:11:19,862 This is underwear with holes in the crotch. 262 00:11:19,897 --> 00:11:21,597 Okay. 263 00:11:21,631 --> 00:11:23,565 I wonder where she hides her chocolate. 264 00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:25,434 She's... 265 00:11:25,468 --> 00:11:28,504 - ( laughs ) Ding ding ding ding ding. - No, no, no. Come on, dude. 266 00:11:28,538 --> 00:11:31,107 Don't read that. That's Hannah's journal. 267 00:11:31,141 --> 00:11:33,443 Of course she keeps a journal, 268 00:11:33,477 --> 00:11:35,879 like all girls who listen to Tori amos and masturbate. 269 00:11:35,913 --> 00:11:38,749 Come on, this is making me very uncomfortable. 270 00:11:38,783 --> 00:11:42,153 - Please don't read that. - She's kind of funny. 271 00:11:42,187 --> 00:11:46,024 I mean, I don't really care how she feels about keeping bread in the house, 272 00:11:46,058 --> 00:11:48,292 but she's kind of funny. 273 00:11:48,327 --> 00:11:51,229 She's a writer, man. That's her thing. 274 00:11:53,632 --> 00:11:55,533 What? 275 00:11:57,302 --> 00:11:59,637 - Hey? - Huh? 276 00:11:59,671 --> 00:12:01,906 - What's up? - Nothing. Let's go back to that table. 277 00:12:01,940 --> 00:12:04,108 - We've got a lot of work left to do. - No, no, no, no. 278 00:12:04,142 --> 00:12:05,076 - What? - Let me see it. 279 00:12:05,110 --> 00:12:06,477 Dude, your girlfriend 280 00:12:06,511 --> 00:12:08,379 is the most boring person on the planet, all right? 281 00:12:08,413 --> 00:12:10,381 And this girl is a very, very close second. 282 00:12:10,415 --> 00:12:12,116 - What do you mean by that? - I mean, this is drivel. 283 00:12:12,150 --> 00:12:13,317 There's nothing to see here, Charles. 284 00:12:13,352 --> 00:12:15,252 I mean, this is... I think you're right. 285 00:12:15,287 --> 00:12:17,856 - Like, it's a violation of... - So why do you have it in your hand? 286 00:12:17,890 --> 00:12:19,457 Well, I just think, you know, this is creepy 287 00:12:19,491 --> 00:12:20,959 and we shouldn't be looking at other people's... 288 00:12:20,993 --> 00:12:22,861 can you stop being fucking weird about it, man? 289 00:12:22,895 --> 00:12:25,296 - Take it easy, man. - You're being so fucking secretive about it. 290 00:12:25,331 --> 00:12:28,132 - Let go! Shit, relax! - It's fucking annoying. 291 00:12:28,167 --> 00:12:30,201 I wanna go on the slide! 292 00:12:30,235 --> 00:12:31,802 Woman: I hate my boyfriend, 293 00:12:31,837 --> 00:12:33,737 but he work at the verizon store 294 00:12:33,772 --> 00:12:35,773 and I get such a good phone plan. 295 00:12:35,841 --> 00:12:38,142 Which ones are yours? 296 00:12:38,177 --> 00:12:41,012 Beatrix and Lola. They're by the slide. 297 00:12:41,046 --> 00:12:44,014 Lola's being such a see-you-next-Tuesday, you know what I mean? 298 00:12:44,049 --> 00:12:46,217 I can't wait to get her home to her mother. 299 00:12:46,251 --> 00:12:48,586 You're the babysitter? 300 00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:50,355 Yeah, of course I'm the babysitter. 301 00:12:50,389 --> 00:12:51,890 What do you think, I have kids? 302 00:12:51,924 --> 00:12:55,060 - I'm 24 years old. - You're the babysitter? 303 00:12:55,094 --> 00:12:58,264 I thought for sure you was an actress with some baby. 304 00:12:58,298 --> 00:13:01,867 No. I'm just like all of you. 305 00:13:05,671 --> 00:13:07,472 - And Mercury was in retrograde. - Oh, my God. 306 00:13:07,507 --> 00:13:09,674 - Girl, I could not get anything right. - When is it not in retrograde? 307 00:13:09,709 --> 00:13:11,175 - What is my sign? - Gemini. 308 00:13:11,210 --> 00:13:12,710 - Thank you. - Good night, ladies. 309 00:13:12,744 --> 00:13:14,745 - Bye. - Bye, Hannah. Good night, mama. 310 00:13:14,779 --> 00:13:16,580 Wait, wait, wait. How was the rest of your day? 311 00:13:16,614 --> 00:13:18,749 You know, weirdly, I think I'm kind of getting used to it. 312 00:13:18,783 --> 00:13:21,351 - Yeah. - Yeah, you know, because it takes a little time. 313 00:13:21,385 --> 00:13:25,154 - Yeah. - Oh, don't tell your boyfriend about that handsy stuff. 314 00:13:25,189 --> 00:13:27,690 I told my man. I thought he was gonna go buck. 315 00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:29,626 I probably shouldn't even call this guy my boyfriend. 316 00:13:29,660 --> 00:13:32,862 - Well, that's like a different thing, yeah. - Yeah. 317 00:13:32,896 --> 00:13:34,530 But do you wanna see something weird? 318 00:13:34,565 --> 00:13:36,633 Yes. Please. 319 00:13:39,204 --> 00:13:41,372 Uh, wow. Okay. 320 00:13:41,406 --> 00:13:45,009 You know, I like a dirty pic, but this right here is weird. 321 00:13:45,044 --> 00:13:48,480 - What is that? - It looks like a rapper's fur coat. 322 00:13:48,514 --> 00:13:52,050 ( Gasps ) It does. Do you know my mother used to have a hat like this? 323 00:13:52,084 --> 00:13:54,752 I know. He sent that and then he sent another text that said, 324 00:13:54,786 --> 00:13:57,488 "sorry, that wasn't for you." 325 00:13:57,522 --> 00:13:59,490 "Sorry" spelled s-r-y. 326 00:13:59,525 --> 00:14:01,893 Okay, first of all, who spells "sorry" wrong? 327 00:14:01,927 --> 00:14:04,162 - Okay, how old are we? - Girl, definitely. 328 00:14:04,196 --> 00:14:06,764 - This is ridiculous. - This picture wasn't for you? That is fucked up. 329 00:14:06,798 --> 00:14:09,300 - I know. It's so disrespectful. - Damn. You need to leave him. 330 00:14:09,334 --> 00:14:12,470 - Here, get it away from me. - You need to break up with this guy on the immediate. 331 00:14:12,504 --> 00:14:14,439 - Thank you. On the immediate. - This is ridiculous. 332 00:14:14,473 --> 00:14:16,775 But we put up with rich touching our butts all the time. 333 00:14:16,809 --> 00:14:18,544 - That's a hella different. - Different. 334 00:14:18,578 --> 00:14:19,678 - A hella different. - Different. 335 00:14:19,712 --> 00:14:21,480 You need to have a little self-respect. 336 00:14:21,515 --> 00:14:23,016 Yeah, that picture was fucking disgusting. 337 00:14:23,050 --> 00:14:25,051 - Have some self-respect. - You know the difference. 338 00:14:25,085 --> 00:14:27,087 That's insane me how little you make. 339 00:14:27,121 --> 00:14:28,888 Personally, I'm offended by that. 340 00:14:28,923 --> 00:14:33,359 You know, you need to tell your bosses that you are valuable, 341 00:14:33,393 --> 00:14:35,728 that you have their children's lives in your hands. 342 00:14:35,762 --> 00:14:38,931 You know, maybe... have nannies ever unionized? 343 00:14:38,966 --> 00:14:40,366 Maybe there could be like a local one 344 00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:41,800 just for this neighborhood. 345 00:14:41,835 --> 00:14:43,402 I could write us the charter. 346 00:14:43,436 --> 00:14:46,104 I don't know what that is, but that sounds awesome. 347 00:14:46,138 --> 00:14:49,273 So I would take a pay cut just for the good of the group. 348 00:14:49,308 --> 00:14:52,744 I really would. I don't consider myself to be a political person, 349 00:14:52,778 --> 00:14:55,480 but when there's a cause that I find meaningful... 350 00:14:55,515 --> 00:14:58,551 excuse me, where did your kids go? 351 00:15:00,888 --> 00:15:02,989 ( Music playing ) 352 00:15:05,726 --> 00:15:07,561 They were... 353 00:15:10,331 --> 00:15:12,165 shit. 354 00:15:13,533 --> 00:15:15,701 ♪ Let your hair down, girl, you already know ♪ 355 00:15:15,736 --> 00:15:18,304 ♪ when I grab your ass, i ain't gonna let it go... ♪ 356 00:15:18,338 --> 00:15:20,106 Lola! 357 00:15:20,140 --> 00:15:23,442 Beatrix! 358 00:15:23,477 --> 00:15:26,712 Fuck! 359 00:15:26,746 --> 00:15:28,447 Lola! Beatrix! 360 00:15:28,482 --> 00:15:30,549 ♪ Ooh, I'm the shit and you're the poo-poo ♪ 361 00:15:30,584 --> 00:15:33,719 ♪ let a nigga fuck you with that uptown voodoo... ♪ 362 00:15:33,753 --> 00:15:36,889 Hey! I found them! 363 00:15:36,924 --> 00:15:40,025 There's babies hiding under the gazebo! 364 00:15:40,060 --> 00:15:41,627 ♪ And you already know who's your daddy ♪ 365 00:15:41,661 --> 00:15:44,397 ♪ who's your daddy, who's your daddy, ho? ♪ 366 00:15:46,867 --> 00:15:49,902 You little fuckers! Come out right now. 367 00:15:49,936 --> 00:15:51,670 Beatrix: No. 368 00:15:53,373 --> 00:15:54,739 Do you know how much you scared me? 369 00:15:54,774 --> 00:15:56,975 - Come out right now. - No! 370 00:15:59,678 --> 00:16:01,846 ( Music playing on TV ) 371 00:16:03,482 --> 00:16:06,684 - Did you like the movie? - Yeah. You know, it's chill. 372 00:16:06,718 --> 00:16:08,986 We could, like, watch something else if you're not into it. 373 00:16:09,020 --> 00:16:11,388 I have, like, other movies. I have, like, five things from Netflix. 374 00:16:11,423 --> 00:16:14,058 I have, like, an animated one, and a few Jen Aniston ones. 375 00:16:14,092 --> 00:16:16,093 I have, like, an original James Bond with Pierce Brosnan 376 00:16:16,128 --> 00:16:18,996 if you're into that or something else. 377 00:16:19,031 --> 00:16:21,132 No, it's not the movies, it's just my knee. 378 00:16:21,166 --> 00:16:24,803 It just, like, really starts to ache if I can't stretch it out. 379 00:16:24,838 --> 00:16:29,642 - Oh, um, I'm sorry. - No. It's fine. 380 00:16:32,279 --> 00:16:36,649 You could put it on me if... if that'll help or whatever. 381 00:16:38,352 --> 00:16:40,320 Okay. 382 00:16:52,598 --> 00:16:54,999 You could touch it if you want. 383 00:17:03,076 --> 00:17:06,077 I don't wanna touch if we haven't kissed. 384 00:17:11,184 --> 00:17:13,819 Oh, God, you smell like a baby. 385 00:17:13,853 --> 00:17:15,721 'Cause I wear lady speed stick. 386 00:17:15,756 --> 00:17:18,457 God, you got a hot rod little bod and everything. 387 00:17:18,492 --> 00:17:20,359 Uh, thank you. 388 00:17:20,394 --> 00:17:22,661 You know, people always say that city girls 389 00:17:22,696 --> 00:17:24,063 are much hotter than long island girls, 390 00:17:24,098 --> 00:17:25,932 but I'm not about to be agreeing with that. 391 00:17:25,966 --> 00:17:27,033 Oh, oh. 392 00:17:27,067 --> 00:17:29,168 Oh, and I like to eat pussy, too. 393 00:17:29,202 --> 00:17:32,171 I know, it seems really weird, but I freakin' love it. 394 00:17:32,205 --> 00:17:35,174 Oh, okay. Okay. Um... 395 00:17:35,208 --> 00:17:38,777 Wow. Okay. 396 00:17:38,812 --> 00:17:41,347 - Um. - ( Soft slurping ) 397 00:17:41,381 --> 00:17:43,449 Um... 398 00:17:46,753 --> 00:17:48,554 Do you wanna have sex? 399 00:17:48,589 --> 00:17:52,592 Do... um, do you wanna have sex instead? 400 00:17:52,626 --> 00:17:54,560 Now? If you want? 401 00:17:54,595 --> 00:17:57,096 Uh, you want to? 402 00:17:57,130 --> 00:17:59,999 Like, uh, yeah, if... if you want to. 403 00:18:00,033 --> 00:18:02,334 This is so chill, the way this is happening. 404 00:18:02,368 --> 00:18:05,370 - I love it. - Um, cool. 405 00:18:05,404 --> 00:18:08,139 Okay, so, uh, I just thought you should know something 406 00:18:08,173 --> 00:18:09,741 just in case it's, like, weird or I'm weird, 407 00:18:09,775 --> 00:18:11,976 which I totally shouldn't be, but, like, just in case I scream, 408 00:18:12,011 --> 00:18:14,479 which I won't, um, I'm like totally ready to have sex. 409 00:18:14,513 --> 00:18:15,647 I've just never had sex before. 410 00:18:15,681 --> 00:18:17,516 So, like, I thought I'd tell you that. 411 00:18:17,584 --> 00:18:18,917 - What? - What? 412 00:18:22,889 --> 00:18:26,625 Yeah, it's just really not my thing. 413 00:18:26,660 --> 00:18:30,396 - What's not your thing? - Virgins. 414 00:18:30,430 --> 00:18:33,999 Oh, okay, but, like, except for the fact that I haven't had sex, 415 00:18:34,033 --> 00:18:35,534 I'm, like, totally not even a virgin. 416 00:18:35,568 --> 00:18:37,168 I'm, like, the least virginy virgin ever. 417 00:18:37,203 --> 00:18:38,837 Yeah, no offense, okay. 418 00:18:38,871 --> 00:18:40,905 I'll totally have sex with you once you've, like, already had sex. 419 00:18:40,940 --> 00:18:43,341 I just... you know, it's like, 420 00:18:43,376 --> 00:18:47,078 virgins get attached or they bleed. 421 00:18:47,113 --> 00:18:49,781 It's like, you get attached when you bleed. 422 00:18:49,815 --> 00:18:52,250 I so don't get attached when I bleed. 423 00:18:52,284 --> 00:18:53,451 You know, it's, like, amazing. 424 00:18:53,486 --> 00:18:55,887 I'm, like, totally not an attached bleeder. 425 00:18:56,889 --> 00:18:59,824 Yeah, it's not gonna happen. 426 00:19:02,595 --> 00:19:05,697 - The guy's definitely gay. - ( Laughing ) 427 00:19:05,731 --> 00:19:09,802 Not like you are, fucking sicko. 428 00:19:09,836 --> 00:19:12,238 - Beatrix: Mommy! - Hi, you guys! 429 00:19:12,273 --> 00:19:17,144 - Daddy! Daddy! - Wow, I thought you guys would be sleeping. 430 00:19:17,178 --> 00:19:19,513 They wanted to wait up for you. 431 00:19:19,548 --> 00:19:22,350 Katherine: Oh, well, I'm so happy to see you guys. 432 00:19:22,384 --> 00:19:23,985 How was your day? 433 00:19:24,019 --> 00:19:26,021 Beatrix: A gerbil was born and it looked like a chewed tomato. 434 00:19:26,055 --> 00:19:28,890 - It was sick. - Katherine: Oh, that sounds sick. 435 00:19:28,924 --> 00:19:31,125 - Lola: Jessa lost us. - Jeff: What? 436 00:19:31,159 --> 00:19:33,828 She lost us. After school. 437 00:19:33,862 --> 00:19:36,029 - But where would that have happened? - At the park. 438 00:19:36,063 --> 00:19:39,332 Jeff: Wait a second. Come on, Lola, I saw you guys all together. 439 00:19:39,367 --> 00:19:40,700 - It was after. - Lola. 440 00:19:40,735 --> 00:19:41,968 You can't pull a fast one on me. 441 00:19:42,003 --> 00:19:43,202 - No more lies. - I'm not lying. 442 00:19:43,237 --> 00:19:44,504 - No, no, no. - Now let's get to bed, bugs. 443 00:19:44,538 --> 00:19:46,639 - It's really, really late. - Girls: No! 444 00:19:46,673 --> 00:19:48,140 All right, mommy and daddy's bed. 445 00:19:48,175 --> 00:19:49,375 - Special occasion. - Girls: Yay! 446 00:19:49,410 --> 00:19:51,044 - Sorry. - Beatrix: This is awesome! 447 00:19:51,112 --> 00:19:53,146 Hey, thank you so much for staying late, Jessa. 448 00:19:53,181 --> 00:19:55,349 - You saved us tonight. Thank you. - Of course. 449 00:19:55,383 --> 00:19:57,985 Katherine: Okay, kids. 450 00:20:00,789 --> 00:20:02,457 I... I did lose your kids. 451 00:20:02,491 --> 00:20:05,760 I wasn't properly looking on, and I lost them. 452 00:20:05,795 --> 00:20:08,063 And if Lola doesn't hate me already, 453 00:20:08,097 --> 00:20:10,499 she certainly hates me now. 454 00:20:10,533 --> 00:20:13,869 - We've all done it. - We have? 455 00:20:13,903 --> 00:20:17,138 I have, once with Lola when she was three. 456 00:20:17,173 --> 00:20:19,040 We were at the union square farmer's market. 457 00:20:19,074 --> 00:20:20,808 I was holding her by the hand. 458 00:20:20,843 --> 00:20:22,977 I let go for, like, a second, and she was gone. 459 00:20:23,011 --> 00:20:26,213 - She just tore off. - Where'd you find her? 460 00:20:26,247 --> 00:20:30,317 She was in the back of a soy milk truck with a very nice lady. 461 00:20:30,351 --> 00:20:32,352 I get that. 462 00:20:32,387 --> 00:20:36,790 I mean, I... actually, I used to do stuff like that myself. 463 00:20:36,825 --> 00:20:39,559 When I was little, I would run away 464 00:20:39,594 --> 00:20:41,529 and tell lies all the time. 465 00:20:41,596 --> 00:20:43,164 Like what? 466 00:20:43,198 --> 00:20:46,167 Like, my mom's this awesome mom, 467 00:20:46,201 --> 00:20:48,903 and, you know, we're best friends. 468 00:20:48,938 --> 00:20:51,340 Well, things like that. 469 00:20:51,374 --> 00:20:56,279 Hopefully, Lola will turn out as well as you did. 470 00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:05,922 ( Siren blaring ) 471 00:21:07,658 --> 00:21:11,528 Jesus Christ, what the fuck is up with your eyebrows? 472 00:21:11,562 --> 00:21:13,464 I'm not saying. 473 00:21:13,498 --> 00:21:15,265 I don't... I didn't come here to talk about that. 474 00:21:15,300 --> 00:21:17,068 You look like a Mexican teenager. 475 00:21:17,102 --> 00:21:19,203 It rules. 476 00:21:19,238 --> 00:21:21,473 I came here to say that I don't think 477 00:21:21,507 --> 00:21:23,275 we should see each other anymore. 478 00:21:23,309 --> 00:21:26,345 I don't think we should see each other anymore, 479 00:21:26,379 --> 00:21:28,847 and it makes me feel stupid and pathetic 480 00:21:28,882 --> 00:21:31,917 to get a picture of your dick that I know was meant for someone else, 481 00:21:31,951 --> 00:21:33,652 and you didn't even bother to explain, 482 00:21:33,686 --> 00:21:35,854 because I made you think that you don't have to explain. 483 00:21:35,888 --> 00:21:38,924 - So... - ( Door opens ) 484 00:21:38,958 --> 00:21:41,693 - ( Door closes ) - What are you asking? 485 00:21:41,727 --> 00:21:43,460 I'm not asking anything. 486 00:21:43,495 --> 00:21:45,863 - ( Wheels squeaking ) - I'm really not asking you for anything. 487 00:21:45,897 --> 00:21:47,430 I have never asked you for anything. 488 00:21:47,465 --> 00:21:51,602 I don't even want anything, okay? 489 00:21:51,636 --> 00:21:55,740 I respect your right to see and do whoever you want, 490 00:21:55,774 --> 00:21:58,710 and I don't even want a boyfriend. 491 00:21:58,777 --> 00:22:00,411 What do you want? 492 00:22:00,446 --> 00:22:03,582 I just want someone who wants to hang out all the time 493 00:22:03,616 --> 00:22:05,184 and thinks I'm the best person in the world 494 00:22:05,218 --> 00:22:08,154 and wants to have sex with only me. 495 00:22:08,188 --> 00:22:10,990 And it makes me feel very stupid to tell you this, 496 00:22:11,024 --> 00:22:13,892 because it makes me sound like a girl who wants to, like, go to brunch. 497 00:22:13,927 --> 00:22:15,527 And I really don't wanna go to brunch, 498 00:22:15,561 --> 00:22:17,996 and I don't want you to, like, sit on the couch while I shop 499 00:22:18,030 --> 00:22:19,597 or, like, even meet my friends. 500 00:22:19,632 --> 00:22:21,432 I don't even want that, okay? 501 00:22:21,466 --> 00:22:24,935 But I also don't wanna share a sex partner with a girl 502 00:22:24,970 --> 00:22:27,171 who seems to have asked for a picture of your dick. 503 00:22:27,205 --> 00:22:30,140 And also, I don't want a picture of your dick 504 00:22:30,175 --> 00:22:32,410 because I live very near you, 505 00:22:32,444 --> 00:22:33,911 so if you wanted me to look at your dick, 506 00:22:33,946 --> 00:22:37,582 I could just come over and look at your dick. 507 00:22:37,616 --> 00:22:41,420 And I don't really see you hearing me 508 00:22:41,454 --> 00:22:43,289 and I don't really see you changing. 509 00:22:43,323 --> 00:22:46,826 So... 510 00:22:46,860 --> 00:22:50,430 I just summed it up for you. 511 00:22:50,464 --> 00:22:53,566 And I'm sorry that I didn't figure it out sooner, 512 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,837 and you must think I'm even stupider than you thought I was already. 513 00:22:57,872 --> 00:23:00,307 But consider it a testament to your charms, 514 00:23:00,341 --> 00:23:01,975 because you might not know this, 515 00:23:02,009 --> 00:23:04,444 but you're very, very charming. 516 00:23:04,478 --> 00:23:09,114 And I really care about you. 517 00:23:09,149 --> 00:23:11,450 And I don't want to anymore, 518 00:23:11,484 --> 00:23:15,420 because it feels too shitty for me. 519 00:23:15,455 --> 00:23:17,722 So I'm gonna leave. 520 00:23:21,326 --> 00:23:22,793 ( Sighs ) 521 00:23:22,828 --> 00:23:24,528 Oh, my God. 522 00:23:35,976 --> 00:23:38,077 I don't like it when you talk to me that way. 523 00:23:38,111 --> 00:23:39,745 Well, I don't like talking to you that way, okay? 524 00:23:39,779 --> 00:23:42,482 I just wanna be sweet to you. That's the thing that's... 525 00:23:42,516 --> 00:23:45,518 but I also wanna know why you didn't text me back. 526 00:23:45,553 --> 00:23:48,154 What, to the picture? I jerked off to it. 527 00:23:48,188 --> 00:23:50,056 You jerked off to it? 528 00:23:50,090 --> 00:23:52,625 No, you looked like you were getting fucked with a cucumber. 529 00:23:52,659 --> 00:23:54,226 ( Both laugh ) 530 00:23:54,261 --> 00:23:57,930 I can't take a serious naked picture of myself, okay? 531 00:23:57,964 --> 00:24:01,733 - That's just not who I am. - Then just be who you are. 532 00:24:11,978 --> 00:24:15,247 - ( Music playing softly ) - ( Chatter ) 533 00:24:15,282 --> 00:24:16,849 ♪ My heart sped up ♪ 534 00:24:16,883 --> 00:24:21,221 ♪ when you picked your ked up off the pavement... ♪ 535 00:24:21,255 --> 00:24:24,524 Would you have sex with a virgin? 536 00:24:24,559 --> 00:24:27,227 Depends on the virgin. 537 00:24:27,262 --> 00:24:29,796 Me. 538 00:24:29,831 --> 00:24:31,631 Oh, Shosh. 539 00:24:31,665 --> 00:24:35,901 If I had a cock, it's all I'd do. 540 00:24:36,837 --> 00:24:40,906 ♪ Oh, where are you going ♪ 541 00:24:40,940 --> 00:24:44,008 ♪ in those keds? ♪ 542 00:24:44,042 --> 00:24:46,343 - Hey, hey. - Hi. Where have you been? 543 00:24:46,378 --> 00:24:48,779 - They're on their third song. - I'm coming from work. 544 00:24:48,813 --> 00:24:51,482 And why do you look so pink and smiley? 545 00:24:51,516 --> 00:24:53,550 Will you be dead before you learn to recognize 546 00:24:53,585 --> 00:24:55,352 a recently fucked person? 547 00:24:55,386 --> 00:24:58,722 I just told you that we didn't fuck. 548 00:24:58,756 --> 00:25:01,658 - Are you allowed to go to the bathroom during? - No. 549 00:25:03,795 --> 00:25:09,566 ♪ In those keds? ♪ 550 00:25:09,601 --> 00:25:13,036 - Girls: Whoo! - Charlie: Wow, thank you all very much for coming. 551 00:25:13,070 --> 00:25:16,672 - My name is Charlie. - And I'm ray. 552 00:25:16,706 --> 00:25:18,774 And together we are questionable goods. 553 00:25:18,808 --> 00:25:21,777 - Crowd: Yeah! - This next song is... 554 00:25:21,811 --> 00:25:24,546 it's a new one, so bear with us. 555 00:25:24,580 --> 00:25:27,182 It's our first time playing it. 556 00:25:27,216 --> 00:25:32,254 And it is for my g-friend Marnie 557 00:25:32,288 --> 00:25:34,890 and for her friend, too, Hannah. 558 00:25:34,924 --> 00:25:39,995 And this is called "Hannah's diary." 559 00:25:40,030 --> 00:25:41,331 Good name. 560 00:25:41,365 --> 00:25:43,266 Charlie: Yep. One, two. 561 00:25:43,301 --> 00:25:44,768 A-one, two, three. 562 00:25:44,802 --> 00:25:47,605 ( Music playing softly ) 563 00:25:50,342 --> 00:25:54,278 ♪ What is Marnie ♪ 564 00:25:54,312 --> 00:25:57,281 ♪ thinking, oh? ♪ 565 00:25:59,084 --> 00:26:01,586 ♪ she needs to know what's out there ♪ 566 00:26:01,620 --> 00:26:06,424 ♪ what is Marnie thinking, oh? ♪ 567 00:26:08,527 --> 00:26:11,129 ♪ how does it feel ♪ 568 00:26:11,163 --> 00:26:13,565 ♪ to date a man with a vagina? ♪ 569 00:26:16,101 --> 00:26:21,573 ♪ doesn't she want to feel an actual penis? ♪ 570 00:26:23,610 --> 00:26:25,443 Is this a love song? 571 00:26:30,784 --> 00:26:34,153 This is the bridge. 572 00:26:35,422 --> 00:26:37,957 "Marnie has to stop whining 573 00:26:37,991 --> 00:26:40,592 and break up with him already. 574 00:26:40,627 --> 00:26:42,094 Of course it'll be painful, 575 00:26:42,128 --> 00:26:43,796 but she's already in so much agony, 576 00:26:43,830 --> 00:26:46,632 stuck in a prison of his kindness. 577 00:26:46,667 --> 00:26:48,668 Just because someone is kind 578 00:26:48,703 --> 00:26:50,570 doesn't mean that they're right. 579 00:26:50,604 --> 00:26:54,206 Better to end it now 580 00:26:54,241 --> 00:26:58,710 and cut off the limb and let the stump heal. 581 00:27:00,613 --> 00:27:02,447 He'll find someone else, 582 00:27:02,481 --> 00:27:05,550 someone that appreciates his kind of smothering love." 583 00:27:05,584 --> 00:27:08,720 ( Strumming rapidly ) 584 00:27:11,925 --> 00:27:14,193 Thank you very much for all coming out. 585 00:27:14,227 --> 00:27:15,962 Everyone have a great fucking night. 586 00:27:15,996 --> 00:27:19,566 ( Crowd murmuring ) 587 00:27:22,871 --> 00:27:25,106 - You're such a fucking bitch! - Aah! 588 00:27:25,140 --> 00:27:27,008 Fucking hell. 589 00:27:27,042 --> 00:27:28,576 That was awesome! 590 00:27:28,610 --> 00:27:31,512 I think I'm gonna puke. 591 00:27:31,546 --> 00:27:32,947 Sync and corrections by into-the-light, www.MY-SUBS.com 592 00:27:32,981 --> 00:27:35,749 ♪ I make the same mistakes ♪ 593 00:27:35,784 --> 00:27:38,953 ♪ feels like I'll never learn ♪ 594 00:27:38,987 --> 00:27:41,890 ♪ always give way too much ♪ 595 00:27:41,924 --> 00:27:44,926 ♪ for little in return ♪ 596 00:27:44,961 --> 00:27:47,863 ♪ I haven't changed a bit ♪ 597 00:27:47,897 --> 00:27:50,899 ♪ I'm still not over it ♪ 598 00:27:50,934 --> 00:27:53,903 ♪ I make the same mistakes ♪ 599 00:27:53,937 --> 00:27:57,040 ♪ I make the same mistakes ♪ 600 00:27:57,074 --> 00:27:59,676 ♪ I ♪ 601 00:28:02,947 --> 00:28:05,983 ♪ I never did grow up ♪ 602 00:28:06,017 --> 00:28:08,919 ♪ feels like I never will ♪ 603 00:28:08,953 --> 00:28:11,855 ♪ my friends are all adults ♪ 604 00:28:11,889 --> 00:28:14,223 ♪ I'm still a teenage girl ♪