1 00:00:57,933 --> 00:00:59,934 (train approaching) 2 00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:16,701 (train whistle) 3 00:01:18,871 --> 00:01:20,872 (police whistle) 4 00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:24,083 (trolley bell) 5 00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:30,608 (singing) Call on Dolly 6 00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,903 If your neighbour needs a new romance 7 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:39,700 Just name the kind of man your sister wants, and she'll snatch him up 8 00:02:39,785 --> 00:02:43,788 Don't forget to bring your maiden aunts and she'll match 'em up 9 00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:45,665 Call on 10 00:02:45,749 --> 00:02:47,166 "Mrs Dolly Levi." 11 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,585 She's the one the spinsters recommend 12 00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:55,383 She even found a lovely bride for poor cousin Isadore 13 00:02:55,467 --> 00:02:57,677 "Social introductions arranged." 14 00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:01,931 Drag your single relations out 15 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:05,768 In a week you'll have to send engraved invitations out 16 00:03:06,228 --> 00:03:09,021 "In an atmosphere of elegance and refinement." 17 00:03:09,106 --> 00:03:11,983 Call on Dolly 18 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:14,110 "Object: Matrimony." 19 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:16,362 If your eldest daughter needs a friend 20 00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:22,702 Just name the kind of man your sister wants, and she'll snatch him up 21 00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:27,290 Don't forget to bring your maiden aunts and she'll match 'em up 22 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:31,294 Call on Dolly 23 00:03:32,421 --> 00:03:38,718 If your eldest daughter needs a friend 24 00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:48,895 I have always been a woman who arranges things 25 00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:55,067 For the pleasure and the profit it derives 26 00:03:55,152 --> 00:03:59,906 I have always been a woman who arranges things 27 00:03:59,990 --> 00:04:09,081 Like furniture and daffodils and lives 28 00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:16,255 If you want your sister courted, brother wed or cheese imported 29 00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:19,425 Just leave everything to me 30 00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:23,012 If you want your roof inspected, eyebrows tweezed or bills collected 31 00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:26,098 Just leave everything to me 32 00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:30,061 If you want your daughter dated, or some marriage consummated 33 00:04:30,145 --> 00:04:33,022 For a rather modest fee 34 00:04:33,106 --> 00:04:36,734 If you want a husband spotted, boyfriend traced or chicken potted 35 00:04:36,818 --> 00:04:39,904 I'll arrange for making all arrangements 36 00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:45,201 Just leave everything to me 37 00:04:46,370 --> 00:04:50,122 - Business or pleasure, Mrs Levi? - Mr Jones, business is always a pleasure. 38 00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:52,959 And you've got more businesses than a dog has fleas! 39 00:04:53,043 --> 00:04:55,378 As my late husband, Ephraim Levi, used to say: 40 00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:58,547 "If you have to live from hand to mouth, you better be ambidextrous!" 41 00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:03,928 If you want your ego bolstered, muscles toned or chair upholstered 42 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:07,056 Just leave everything to me 43 00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:10,768 Charming social introductions, expert mandolin instructions 44 00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:13,771 Just leave everything to me 45 00:05:13,855 --> 00:05:17,441 If you want your culture rounded, French improved or torso pounded 46 00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:20,069 With a ten-year guarantee 47 00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:24,156 If you want a birth recorded, collies bred or kittens boarded 48 00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:27,535 I'll proceed to plan the whole procedure 49 00:05:27,619 --> 00:05:32,415 Just leave everything to me 50 00:05:34,584 --> 00:05:36,502 - Where to, Dolly? - Yonkers. 51 00:05:36,586 --> 00:05:39,839 To handle a highly personal matter for Mr Vandergelder, 52 00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:42,383 the well-known unmarried half-a-millionaire. 53 00:05:42,634 --> 00:05:45,177 - Gonna marry him yourself? - Why, Mr Sullivan, 54 00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:48,723 whatever put such a preposterous idea into my head? 55 00:05:48,807 --> 00:05:50,307 Your head. 56 00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:55,688 If you want a law abolished, jury swayed or toenails polished 57 00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:58,816 Just leave everything to me 58 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:02,611 If you want your liver tested, glasses made, cash invested 59 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:05,865 Just leave everything to me 60 00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:09,493 If you want your children coddled, corsets boned or furs remodelled 61 00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:12,788 Or some nice, fresh fricassee 62 00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:16,459 If you want your bustle shifted, wedding planned or bosom lifted 63 00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:19,879 Don't be ashamed, girls! Life is full of secrets and I keep 'em! 64 00:06:19,963 --> 00:06:23,257 I'll discreetly use my own discretion 65 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:26,635 I'll arrange for making all arrangements 66 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,764 I'll proceed to plan the whole procedure 67 00:06:29,848 --> 00:06:35,978 Just leave everything 68 00:06:36,063 --> 00:06:42,109 To me 69 00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:03,811 - And I'm telling you that I will marry her! - Not without my permission, you won't! 70 00:10:03,895 --> 00:10:06,355 This is a free country, not a private kingdom. 71 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,607 She's consented and I'll marry her. 72 00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:11,318 - I'm telling you that you won't. - I'm telling you I will. 73 00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:13,112 - Never. - Tomorrow. Today. 74 00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:17,157 Ermengarde is not for you. You can't support her. You are an artist. 75 00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:19,785 - I make a good living. - A living, Mr Kemper, 76 00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:23,414 is made by selling something that everybody needs at least once a year. 77 00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:28,127 And a million is made by producing something everybody needs every day. 78 00:10:28,211 --> 00:10:32,172 You artists, you painters, produce nothing that nobody needs, never. 79 00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:33,799 You might as well know, 80 00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:37,594 any way we can find to get married is right and fair and we'll do it. 81 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:41,307 You are an impractical, seven-foot-tall nincompoop. 82 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:44,643 - That's an insult. - All the facts about you are insults. 83 00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:48,981 - Thank you for the honour of your visit. - Ermengarde is of age and there's no law... 84 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:54,903 Law? The law is there to prevent crime. Men of sense are there to prevent foolishness. 85 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:58,198 It is I that will prevent you from marrying my niece. 86 00:10:58,283 --> 00:11:03,162 And I've already taken the necessary steps. Mrs Dolly Levi is on her way here even now. 87 00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:05,205 Dolly Levi? Your marriage broker? 88 00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:09,376 Never mind that. She'll pick up Ermengarde and take her to New York, 89 00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:12,087 and keep her there until this foolishness is over. 90 00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:15,007 - We'll see about that. - Thank you again for the honour... 91 00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,634 You have to sit still, Mr Vandergelder. 92 00:11:17,719 --> 00:11:21,221 If I cut your throat it will be practically unintentional. 93 00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:23,807 90% of the people in this world are fools 94 00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:26,894 and the rest are in great danger of contamination. 95 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:31,357 Enough of this. I'm a busy man with things to do. 96 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:33,650 A scraped chin is the least of them. 97 00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:36,278 I did the best I could, Mr Vandergelder. 98 00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:41,241 - Joe. - Yes? 99 00:11:41,326 --> 00:11:44,411 I've got special reasons for looking my best today. 100 00:11:44,496 --> 00:11:47,873 Is there something a little extra you can do? A little special? 101 00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,041 What? 102 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:51,752 You know, do some of those things you do to the young fellas. 103 00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,879 Smarten me up a little bit. 104 00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:56,882 Face massage. A little perfume water. 105 00:11:56,966 --> 00:12:03,639 All I know is 15 cents' worth, like usual, and that includes all that's decent to do. 106 00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:07,518 Listen, I don't want you blabbing this, but I need something extra today 107 00:12:07,602 --> 00:12:10,479 because I'm going to New York to call on a very refined lady, 108 00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:12,439 name of Miss Irene Molloy. 109 00:12:12,524 --> 00:12:15,734 Your callin' on ladies is none of my business, Mr Vandergelder. 110 00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:17,861 - Hold your horses, Joe. - Uncle Horace! 111 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:20,823 - Uncle Horace! - Yes, what is it? 112 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:24,076 - What have you done to Ambrose? - I had a quiet talk with him. 113 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:27,621 - You did? - Yes, I explained to him that he's a fool. 114 00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:31,458 - Oh, Uncle! - Weeping, weeping - a waste of water. 115 00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:34,670 I've done you a good turn. You'll thank me when you're 50. 116 00:12:35,296 --> 00:12:37,131 But, Uncle, I love him. 117 00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:39,299 Save your tears for New York, where they won't be noticed. 118 00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:41,135 - But I love him! - You don't. 119 00:12:41,219 --> 00:12:43,971 - But I do! - Leave those things to me. 120 00:12:44,055 --> 00:12:46,265 If I don't marry Ambrose, I know I'll die! 121 00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:48,725 - Of what? - A broken heart. 122 00:12:48,810 --> 00:12:52,104 Never heard of it. Are you ready for Mrs Levi when she comes? 123 00:12:52,188 --> 00:12:53,230 Yes. 124 00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:56,942 Well, get ready some more and stay in your room until she arrives. 125 00:12:57,026 --> 00:12:58,652 (Ermengarde sobs) 126 00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:04,032 Cornelius! 127 00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:08,871 Barnaby! 128 00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:12,833 Cornelius! Barnaby! 129 00:13:18,923 --> 00:13:22,926 - You stamped, Mr Vandergelder? - Yes, I stamped. 130 00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:25,012 Are my niece's bags at the railroad station? 131 00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:27,639 - Yes. - And you, did you label them properly? 132 00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:29,266 - Yes. - Good. 133 00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:31,768 I'm going to New York on important business, 134 00:13:31,853 --> 00:13:33,812 then I'll be marching in the parade. 135 00:13:33,897 --> 00:13:37,441 - Yes, Mr Vandergelder. - I'm planning to stay at the Central Hotel. 136 00:13:37,525 --> 00:13:39,943 We've never been here alone, Mr Vandergelder. 137 00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:44,323 Now, in honour of the occasion, I'll promote you both. Cornelius, how old are you? 138 00:13:44,407 --> 00:13:46,825 28 3/4, Mr Vandergelder. 139 00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:52,331 Is that all? That's a foolish age to be at. I thought you were 40. 140 00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:55,459 No, I'm 28 3/4. 141 00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:58,795 Well, a man's not worth a cent till he's 40. 142 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,089 We pay him wages until then to make mistakes. 143 00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:04,092 - Anyway, I'm promoting you to chief clerk. - Chief clerk? 144 00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:06,637 - Yes. - Well, what am I now? 145 00:14:06,721 --> 00:14:12,142 You're an impertinent fool. If you behave, I'll promote you from fool to chief clerk, 146 00:14:12,227 --> 00:14:14,394 with a raise in your wages. 147 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,688 Thank you, Mr Vandergelder. 148 00:14:16,773 --> 00:14:20,817 You, Barnaby, I'm promoting you from idiot apprentice to incompetent clerk. 149 00:14:20,902 --> 00:14:24,530 - Thank you, Mr Vandergelder. - Mr Vandergelder? Mr Vandergelder? 150 00:14:24,614 --> 00:14:25,864 What is it? 151 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:29,660 Does the chief clerk get one evening off a week? 152 00:14:29,744 --> 00:14:34,831 So that's how you thank me, eh? No, sir. You'll attend to the store as usual. 153 00:14:34,916 --> 00:14:41,213 You keep on asking for evenings free and you'll find you have all your days free. 154 00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:42,589 Yes, Mr Vandergelder. 155 00:14:42,674 --> 00:14:46,051 And when I come back I wanna hear that you ran the place perfectly. 156 00:14:46,135 --> 00:14:48,428 If I hear of any foolishness, I'll fire you both. 157 00:14:48,513 --> 00:14:49,555 (both) Yes. 158 00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:51,181 You might as well know it now. 159 00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:55,060 When I return there will be some changes around here. 160 00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:59,189 - You're going to have a mistress. - I'm too young, Mr Vandergelder. 161 00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:05,779 Not yours, idiot. Mine. I mean, I'm planning to get married. 162 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:08,240 - Married? - Yes, married. Any objections? 163 00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:09,324 No, but... 164 00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:11,577 No, many congratulations, Mr Vandergelder. 165 00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:13,829 - And to the lady. - That's none of your business. 166 00:15:14,289 --> 00:15:15,914 - Any questions? - No, but... 167 00:15:15,999 --> 00:15:17,791 - But what? - But I mean... 168 00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,084 - Speak up. - Why? 169 00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:22,671 - Why what, damn it! Speak up! - Why are you getting married? 170 00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:27,134 Let me tell you something, son. 171 00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:32,139 I've worked hard and I've become rich and friendless and mean. 172 00:15:33,016 --> 00:15:37,603 And in America it's about as far as you can go. 173 00:15:41,566 --> 00:15:45,319 It's time to be doing something a little bit foolish. 174 00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:48,530 Besides, I need a steady housekeeper. 175 00:15:49,824 --> 00:15:54,036 It takes a woman, all powdered and pink 176 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:57,998 To joyously clean out the drain in the sink 177 00:15:58,082 --> 00:16:02,628 And it takes an angel with long, golden lashes 178 00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:08,383 And soft Dresden fingers for dumping the ashes 179 00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:13,472 Yes, it takes a woman, a dainty woman 180 00:16:13,556 --> 00:16:16,683 A sweetheart, a mistress, a wife 181 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:20,103 Oh, yes, it takes a woman 182 00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:22,230 A fragile woman 183 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:25,734 To bring you the sweet things in life 184 00:16:28,905 --> 00:16:33,116 The frail young maiden, who's constantly there 185 00:16:33,201 --> 00:16:37,329 For washing and blueing, and shoeing the mare 186 00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:42,125 And it takes a female for setting the table 187 00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:47,756 And weaning the Guernsey and cleaning the stable 188 00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,550 Yes, it takes a woman 189 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:52,928 A dainty woman 190 00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,972 A sweetheart, a mistress, a wife 191 00:16:56,891 --> 00:16:59,476 Oh, yes, it takes a woman 192 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:01,645 A fragile woman 193 00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:04,856 To bring you the sweet things in life 194 00:17:08,486 --> 00:17:17,285 And so she'll work until infinity 195 00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:25,794 Three cheers for femininity 196 00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,171 (horse neighs) 197 00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:37,681 God bless fem-i-nin-i-ty 198 00:17:39,142 --> 00:17:43,478 And in the winter she'll shovel the ice 199 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:47,649 And lovingly set out the traps for the mice 200 00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:52,654 She's a joy and treasure for, practically speaking, 201 00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:58,660 To whom can you turn when the plumbing is leaking? 202 00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:04,666 To that dainty woman 203 00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:07,252 That fragile woman 204 00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:11,214 That sweetheart, that mistress, that wife 205 00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:16,344 That womanly wife 206 00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:20,098 Oh, yes, it takes a woman 207 00:18:20,183 --> 00:18:22,434 A husky woman 208 00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:27,022 To bring you the sweet things in life 209 00:18:27,482 --> 00:18:30,066 Oh, yes, it takes a woman 210 00:18:30,151 --> 00:18:32,277 A dainty woman 211 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:35,989 A sweetheart, a mistress, a wife 212 00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:38,700 Oh, yes, it takes a woman 213 00:18:38,785 --> 00:18:40,827 A fragile woman 214 00:18:40,912 --> 00:18:47,083 To bring you the sweet things in life 215 00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:49,920 (Dolly) Well, well, well, well, well. 216 00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:52,672 Good morning, Mr Vandergelder. 217 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:56,843 Mr Hackl. Mr Tucker. 218 00:18:57,386 --> 00:18:59,471 - Gentlemen. - Good morning, ma'am. 219 00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:01,306 Uh, morning, Mrs Levi. 220 00:19:02,225 --> 00:19:06,895 How handsome you look today. Ooh, you absolutely take my breath away. 221 00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,647 Ermengarde is crying her eyes out. 222 00:19:08,731 --> 00:19:11,274 You can take her to New York, but blow her nose first. 223 00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,860 If only Irene Molloy could see you now. 224 00:19:13,945 --> 00:19:18,365 Find someplace else to loaf. And you two get back to the store. Go on! 225 00:19:18,449 --> 00:19:20,909 And don't forget to put the lid on the sheep dip. 226 00:19:21,369 --> 00:19:22,828 I don't know what's come over you lately, 227 00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:25,539 but you seem to be growing younger every day. 228 00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:30,126 Well, if a man eats careful, there's no reason why he should look old. 229 00:19:30,211 --> 00:19:36,132 - You never said a truer word. - Even if I never see 40... uh, 35, again. 230 00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:40,303 35. I can see that you're the sort that will be stamping about at 100, 231 00:19:40,388 --> 00:19:43,807 eating five meals a day, like my Uncle Harry, may he rest in peace. 232 00:19:43,891 --> 00:19:46,935 Let me see your hand, Mr Vandergelder. Oh, show me your hand. 233 00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:49,187 - Why? - I'm a judge of hands. I read hands. 234 00:19:49,272 --> 00:19:53,859 - And I use them to get things done. - Oh! Lord in heaven! Goodness gracious! 235 00:19:53,943 --> 00:19:57,195 Oh, I just can't believe it. It's such a long lifeline. 236 00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:00,282 - Where? - From here I don't know where it goes. 237 00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:04,035 It runs right off your hand. They'll have to hit you with a mallet. 238 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,539 They'll have to stifle you with a sofa pillow. You'll bury us all. 239 00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:08,748 I will? 240 00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:13,378 Say, you're all spiffed up today, aren't you? 241 00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:17,048 - Yes. - And not for this smelly horse, either. 242 00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:21,553 Well, if I had to guess, I'd say you was goin' somewhere. 243 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,559 Remarkable, Mrs Levi. How do you do it? 244 00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:30,020 Two and two is four, Mr Vandergelder. 245 00:20:30,104 --> 00:20:32,898 With a head like yours you'll be a rich woman someday. 246 00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:35,025 That's exactly what I had in mind. 247 00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:38,862 Then I suggest you go about your business and pick up Ermengarde, 248 00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:43,575 - for which I am paying you good money. - Speaking of business, Mr Vandergelder, 249 00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:46,953 I suppose you've given up all idea of getting married? 250 00:20:47,038 --> 00:20:48,705 - Is that what you suppose? - Uh-huh. 251 00:20:49,165 --> 00:20:51,833 Then suppose you listen to this, Mrs Levi. 252 00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:57,005 I've decided I've practically decided to ask Irene Molloy to be my wife. 253 00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:00,675 - You have? - Yes, I have. 254 00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:03,803 I'm going to New York and discuss it with her this very afternoon. 255 00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:11,019 Well, that is just about the best news I have ever heard, Mr Vandergelder. 256 00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:14,940 Oh, yes, indeed. Marvellous news. Oh, dear me. Isn't it wonderful? 257 00:21:15,024 --> 00:21:19,444 I mean, I'm racking my brain, trying to think of something that's made me happier, 258 00:21:19,528 --> 00:21:23,031 but I just can't come up with a thing, because this is just too wonderful. 259 00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:25,784 Well, it's all your fault, you know. 260 00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:30,497 You put me into this marryin' frame of mind with all your introductions and scheming. 261 00:21:30,581 --> 00:21:32,916 - A widow has to earn a living. - One day I wake up 262 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:36,211 - and the house seems like an empty shell. - Certainly is. 263 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,171 - And messy, too. - Certainly is. 264 00:21:38,255 --> 00:21:40,882 A man needs someone to take out the garbage. 265 00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:45,095 And Irene Molloy's just the one to do it. Oh, darling girl. 266 00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:49,224 Well, I think it's perfectly wonderful what's going to happen in your household. 267 00:21:49,767 --> 00:21:55,939 I never did like the idea of all that money of yours lying around in piles in the bank, 268 00:21:56,023 --> 00:22:00,110 so useless and motionless. As my late husband, Ephraim Levi, used to say: 269 00:22:00,194 --> 00:22:03,029 "Money should circulate like rainwater." 270 00:22:03,197 --> 00:22:08,368 "It should flow down among the people, through little dressmakers and restaurants, 271 00:22:08,452 --> 00:22:11,454 setting up a business here, furnishing a good time there." 272 00:22:11,539 --> 00:22:16,876 I just know that you and Mrs Vandergelder will see that all your hard-earned wealth 273 00:22:16,961 --> 00:22:20,422 starts flowing in and around many people's lives, just flowing... 274 00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:22,841 - All right. Stop saying that! - Pouring out... 275 00:22:22,925 --> 00:22:26,344 So there's nothing more for me to do but wish you happiness 276 00:22:26,429 --> 00:22:29,347 - and say goodbye. - Yes, well, goodbye. 277 00:22:29,432 --> 00:22:32,058 And when I get to New York, I'll tell the girl I had lined up for you, 278 00:22:32,143 --> 00:22:34,019 the heiress, not to wait. 279 00:22:34,103 --> 00:22:38,106 - What did you say? - Oh, nothing, nothing. A word. "Heiress." 280 00:22:38,482 --> 00:22:43,028 Well, just a minute. That's kind of unusual, isn't it, Mrs Levi? 281 00:22:43,112 --> 00:22:47,574 Well, I haven't been wearing myself to the bone hunting up usual girls to interest you. 282 00:22:47,658 --> 00:22:50,952 But now all that's too late. You're engaged to marry Irene Molloy. 283 00:22:51,037 --> 00:22:53,913 - I am not engaged. - I cannot keep upsetting 284 00:22:53,998 --> 00:22:56,541 the finest women around unless you mean business. 285 00:22:56,625 --> 00:23:00,462 - Who said I don't mean business? - You're playing a very dangerous game. 286 00:23:00,546 --> 00:23:03,548 - Dangerous? - Of course it's dangerous. It's called 287 00:23:03,632 --> 00:23:05,258 "tampering with a woman's affections". 288 00:23:05,342 --> 00:23:08,261 The only way to save yourself from that charge 289 00:23:08,345 --> 00:23:11,973 is to get married to someone soon, very soon. 290 00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:14,517 - Don't worry. - I won't. 291 00:23:14,602 --> 00:23:17,896 I'll meet you in front of Irene Molloy's hat shop at 2.30. 292 00:23:17,980 --> 00:23:21,566 - Never mind. You've done your work. - I wouldn't miss it for the world. 293 00:23:21,650 --> 00:23:24,194 I want to be there to make sure nothing goes wrong. 294 00:23:24,278 --> 00:23:28,406 Just tend to Ermengarde or else I'll ask you to return the fee I gave you for that. 295 00:23:28,491 --> 00:23:31,493 - Speaking of money... - Oh, no. How much? 296 00:23:31,577 --> 00:23:37,791 Well, I left my money in the handbag I took to the cleaner's just before it burned down. 297 00:23:37,875 --> 00:23:43,046 20! Oh, bless you, and don't you worry your handsome head about a thing. 298 00:23:43,130 --> 00:23:46,925 Just keep all your thoughts on that lovely Irene Molloy. 299 00:24:09,156 --> 00:24:16,663 It takes a woman to quietly plan 300 00:24:17,540 --> 00:24:25,213 To take him and change him to her kind of man 301 00:24:26,549 --> 00:24:37,767 And to gently lead him where fortune can find him 302 00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:42,188 And not let him know 303 00:24:42,273 --> 00:24:48,153 That the power behind him 304 00:24:48,237 --> 00:24:55,326 Was that dainty woman 305 00:24:56,787 --> 00:25:02,876 That fragile woman 306 00:25:03,377 --> 00:25:06,629 That sweetheart 307 00:25:07,047 --> 00:25:09,632 That mistress 308 00:25:10,634 --> 00:25:13,928 That wife 309 00:25:19,852 --> 00:25:22,061 (Dolly hums) 310 00:25:33,449 --> 00:25:36,117 Da, da, da, da 311 00:25:36,452 --> 00:25:39,621 Da, da, da 312 00:25:41,457 --> 00:25:47,086 (sighs) If he had any taste at all, he'd have the shutters done over in green. 313 00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:51,466 Mm, forest-green shutters. 314 00:25:52,343 --> 00:25:56,346 - (Ermengarde) What are you doing? - (Ambrose) Hurry! 315 00:25:56,430 --> 00:25:58,598 - My uncle... - He just left. 316 00:25:59,141 --> 00:26:00,391 Now quick! We're running away. 317 00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:03,186 - Running away? - Hurry, before the train gets here! 318 00:26:03,270 --> 00:26:05,480 - Train? - To New York, to get married. 319 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:09,567 - We're going to elope. - Elope? That's such an awful word. 320 00:26:09,652 --> 00:26:13,279 - Oh, Ermengarde. - My, what a romantic scene. 321 00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:18,034 Oh, Mrs Levi, please explain to Ambrose. I wanna marry him, but not elope. 322 00:26:18,118 --> 00:26:21,996 - This doesn't concern Mrs Levi. - Everything concerns Dolly Levi. 323 00:26:22,081 --> 00:26:27,418 - Don't listen to her. I know why you're here. - To help. Love needs all the help it can get. 324 00:26:27,503 --> 00:26:30,255 - Wait a minute. Listen to me. - There's no time. 325 00:26:30,673 --> 00:26:33,383 Can we climb in? I feel an updraught in my underpants. 326 00:26:33,467 --> 00:26:36,052 - Oh, Mrs Levi! - This is no way to elope. 327 00:26:36,136 --> 00:26:39,305 If you follow my suggestions, not only will he let you marry 328 00:26:39,390 --> 00:26:41,349 but he'll dance at your wedding. 329 00:26:41,684 --> 00:26:45,228 And not alone, either. Mr Kemper, can you dance? 330 00:26:45,312 --> 00:26:49,274 - Dance? I'm an artist, Mrs Levi. I paint. - No problem. 331 00:26:49,358 --> 00:26:53,111 - "Mrs Levi. Painters taught how to dance." - Here's what we'll do. 332 00:26:53,195 --> 00:26:56,114 - I'm going to take you to New York. - See? I told you. 333 00:26:56,198 --> 00:27:00,618 You will stay close by. Tonight you will take her to dinner at the Harmonia Gardens. 334 00:27:00,703 --> 00:27:03,705 There's this man, Rudolph Reisenweber. He knows me well. 335 00:27:03,789 --> 00:27:06,124 We'll enter you in the polka contest. 336 00:27:06,208 --> 00:27:09,794 The prize is a gold cup and some money, and you'll win it. 337 00:27:09,878 --> 00:27:12,964 - Oh, the cups we won, my husband and I. - Now, wait a minute. 338 00:27:13,048 --> 00:27:16,050 I'm surprised you have acquaintances in a place like that. 339 00:27:16,552 --> 00:27:21,848 Not acquaintances, Ermengarde. Friends. Dear friends from days gone by. 340 00:27:22,558 --> 00:27:26,853 My late husband, Ephraim Levi, believed in life, any place you could find it, 341 00:27:26,937 --> 00:27:29,272 wherever there were people, all kinds of people. 342 00:27:30,190 --> 00:27:33,568 And every Friday night, even when times were bad, 343 00:27:34,403 --> 00:27:36,904 every Friday night, like clockwork, 344 00:27:37,406 --> 00:27:42,493 down those stairs of the Harmonia Gardens we came, Ephraim and I. 345 00:27:44,538 --> 00:27:47,665 Not acquaintances, Ermengarde. Friends. 346 00:27:47,750 --> 00:27:50,918 It's all very well for you, but you're suggesting that we... 347 00:27:51,003 --> 00:27:55,298 Mr Kemper, do you or do you not wish to show Horace that you mean business? 348 00:27:55,382 --> 00:27:56,382 Yes! 349 00:27:56,467 --> 00:28:00,136 All right, then. Go to the Harmonia Gardens and say that Mrs Levi sent you. 350 00:28:00,220 --> 00:28:06,601 And, oh... yes, well, tell Rudolph... Tell Rudolph that Dolly's coming back. 351 00:28:06,685 --> 00:28:07,977 Dolly's coming back? 352 00:28:08,062 --> 00:28:10,980 And I want a table for two and a chicken for eight o'clock. 353 00:28:11,065 --> 00:28:15,860 Mr Vandergelder will learn of your triumph and everything will work out beautifully. 354 00:28:15,944 --> 00:28:18,905 - But how, Mrs Levi? How? - How? 355 00:28:21,241 --> 00:28:22,617 Oh. 356 00:28:23,285 --> 00:28:27,121 28 3/4 years old and I still don't get an evening free. 357 00:28:27,206 --> 00:28:29,457 When am I gonna begin to live? 358 00:28:32,669 --> 00:28:36,047 Barnaby? How much money have you got? 359 00:28:36,507 --> 00:28:39,050 - Huh? - I mean, that you can get your hands on? 360 00:28:39,134 --> 00:28:45,056 - About three dollars. Why? - Barnaby, you and I are going to New York. 361 00:28:45,140 --> 00:28:47,517 Cornelius, we can't. Close the store? 362 00:28:47,601 --> 00:28:51,646 We'll have to, cos some rotten cans of chicken mash are going to explode. 363 00:28:51,730 --> 00:28:53,439 Holy cabooses! How do you know? 364 00:28:53,524 --> 00:28:55,775 Because I'll light some candles under them. 365 00:28:55,859 --> 00:28:59,779 They'll make such a stink that customers won't be able to come in for 24 hours. 366 00:28:59,863 --> 00:29:04,367 That'll get us an evening free. We are going to New York and we are gonna live. 367 00:29:04,451 --> 00:29:08,579 We're gonna have a good meal, be in danger, get almost arrested. 368 00:29:08,664 --> 00:29:11,499 - And we're gonna spend all our money. - Holy cabooses! 369 00:29:11,583 --> 00:29:12,834 And one more thing. 370 00:29:12,918 --> 00:29:17,338 We are not coming back to Yonkers until we've each kissed a girl. 371 00:29:18,298 --> 00:29:21,968 Cornelius, you can't do that. You don't know any girls. 372 00:29:23,137 --> 00:29:27,181 I'm 28 3/4. I gotta begin sometime. 373 00:29:27,683 --> 00:29:31,227 I'm only 19 1/2. With me it's not so urgent. 374 00:29:31,728 --> 00:29:34,063 May I make a suggestion, gentlemen? 375 00:29:34,189 --> 00:29:35,440 Mrs Levi. 376 00:29:36,275 --> 00:29:39,360 - I just couldn't help hearing. - We'll be fired. 377 00:29:39,695 --> 00:29:43,030 - We were only talking. - Mr Hackl, Mr Tucker, 378 00:29:43,615 --> 00:29:48,744 there is nothing that makes me happier than the thought of two fine young men 379 00:29:48,829 --> 00:29:51,664 enjoying the company of two lovely ladies. 380 00:29:52,374 --> 00:29:55,251 - What ladies? Where? - In New York, Mr Hackl, 381 00:29:55,335 --> 00:29:58,337 to which, unless my ears play me tricks, you are bound. 382 00:29:58,422 --> 00:30:02,967 Now, there's this millinery shop run by a charming woman. 383 00:30:03,051 --> 00:30:07,680 - "Irene Molloy"? - And her attractive assistant, Minnie Fay. 384 00:30:07,764 --> 00:30:10,725 And now that you've noted the address, I have only this to say. 385 00:30:11,226 --> 00:30:15,438 Two o'clock in the afternoon there is the ideal time for friendly conversation. 386 00:30:15,522 --> 00:30:17,648 Definitely no later than 2.30. 387 00:30:17,733 --> 00:30:20,359 And if you ever say that this was my suggestion, 388 00:30:20,444 --> 00:30:24,572 well, I should denounce you both for the terrible liars that you are. 389 00:30:29,369 --> 00:30:32,538 - A millinery shop. - Women who work! 390 00:30:32,623 --> 00:30:34,832 - Adventure, Barnaby. - I'm scared. 391 00:30:34,917 --> 00:30:37,084 - Living, Barnaby. - I'm scared. 392 00:30:37,169 --> 00:30:40,463 - Will ya come, Barnaby? - Yes, Cornelius! Yes! 393 00:30:40,547 --> 00:30:45,968 The lights of Broadway! Elevated trains! The stuffed whale at Barnum's museum! 394 00:30:46,136 --> 00:30:48,596 Stuffed whale! Wow! 395 00:30:49,389 --> 00:30:51,682 Women who work! Wow! 396 00:30:52,059 --> 00:30:55,228 All clear up here, Cornelius! You gonna light 'em all? 397 00:30:55,479 --> 00:30:57,980 Cornelius, look out! That bottom row, 398 00:30:58,065 --> 00:31:00,608 they're swelled up like they're ready to burst! 399 00:31:01,568 --> 00:31:05,363 - Holy cabooses! What a smell! - Let's get dressed, Barnaby. 400 00:31:05,447 --> 00:31:07,573 We're going to New York! 401 00:31:09,159 --> 00:31:10,785 Out there 402 00:31:10,869 --> 00:31:13,788 There's a world outside of Yonkers 403 00:31:14,331 --> 00:31:18,626 Way out there beyond this hick town, Barnaby 404 00:31:19,127 --> 00:31:21,546 There's a slick town, Barnaby 405 00:31:23,549 --> 00:31:25,216 Out there 406 00:31:25,300 --> 00:31:28,427 Full of shine and full of sparkle 407 00:31:28,887 --> 00:31:33,391 Close your eyes and see it glisten, Barnaby 408 00:31:34,518 --> 00:31:36,894 Listen, Barnaby 409 00:31:36,979 --> 00:31:38,563 (explosions) 410 00:31:43,610 --> 00:31:48,072 Put on your Sunday clothes, there's lots of world out there 411 00:31:48,532 --> 00:31:52,118 Get out the brilliantine and dime cigars 412 00:31:53,328 --> 00:31:58,124 We're gonna find adventure in the evening air 413 00:31:58,208 --> 00:32:00,293 Girls in white in a perfumed night 414 00:32:00,377 --> 00:32:03,379 Where the lights are bright as the stars 415 00:32:03,630 --> 00:32:07,967 Put on your Sunday clothes, we're gonna ride through town 416 00:32:08,385 --> 00:32:12,763 In one of those new horse-drawn open cars 417 00:32:13,015 --> 00:32:15,433 We'll see the shows at Delmonico's 418 00:32:15,517 --> 00:32:18,060 And we'll close the town in a whirl 419 00:32:18,145 --> 00:32:22,857 And we won't come home until we've kissed a girl 420 00:32:23,817 --> 00:32:28,487 Put on your Sunday clothes when you feel down and out 421 00:32:28,655 --> 00:32:32,325 Strut down the street and have your picture took 422 00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:38,456 Dressed like a dream your spirits seem to turn about 423 00:32:38,540 --> 00:32:41,000 That Sunday shine is a certain sign 424 00:32:41,084 --> 00:32:43,544 That you feel as fine as you look 425 00:32:44,379 --> 00:32:49,008 Beneath your parasol the world is all a smile 426 00:32:49,426 --> 00:32:53,512 That makes you feel brand-new down to your toes 427 00:32:54,097 --> 00:32:56,390 Get out your feathers, your patent leathers 428 00:32:56,475 --> 00:32:59,018 Your beads and buckles and bows 429 00:32:59,102 --> 00:33:02,188 For there's no blue Monday in your Sunday 430 00:33:02,272 --> 00:33:04,482 No Monday in your Sunday 431 00:33:04,566 --> 00:33:08,778 No Monday in your Sunday clothes 432 00:33:09,946 --> 00:33:14,492 Put on your Sunday clothes when you feel down and out 433 00:33:15,077 --> 00:33:18,454 Strut down the street and have your picture took 434 00:33:20,207 --> 00:33:24,210 Dressed like a dream your spirits seem to turn about 435 00:33:24,670 --> 00:33:27,088 That Sunday shine is a certain sign 436 00:33:27,172 --> 00:33:30,091 That you feel as fine as you look 437 00:33:30,509 --> 00:33:34,887 Beneath your parasol the world is all a smile 438 00:33:35,389 --> 00:33:39,600 That makes you feel brand-new down to your toes 439 00:33:40,102 --> 00:33:42,395 Get out your feathers, your patent leathers 440 00:33:42,479 --> 00:33:44,772 Your beads and buckles and bows 441 00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:49,777 For there's no blue Monday in your Sunday clothes 442 00:34:11,591 --> 00:34:15,803 Put on your Sunday clothes when you feel down and out 443 00:34:16,471 --> 00:34:20,558 Strut down the street and have your picture took 444 00:34:21,810 --> 00:34:26,021 Dressed like a dream your spirits seem to turn about 445 00:34:26,356 --> 00:34:28,733 That Sunday shine is a certain sign 446 00:34:28,817 --> 00:34:31,485 That you feel as fine as you look 447 00:34:31,987 --> 00:34:36,657 Beneath your bowler brim the world's a simple song 448 00:34:37,117 --> 00:34:40,661 A lovely lilt that makes you tilt your nose 449 00:34:41,705 --> 00:34:43,789 Get out your slickers 450 00:34:44,249 --> 00:34:46,167 Your flannel knickers 451 00:34:46,668 --> 00:34:48,919 Your red suspenders and hose 452 00:34:49,004 --> 00:34:52,298 For there's no blue Monday 453 00:34:54,676 --> 00:34:57,261 In your Sunday 454 00:34:59,681 --> 00:35:02,516 No blue Monday 455 00:35:02,601 --> 00:35:06,854 In your Sunday clothes 456 00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:13,944 Ermengarde, keep smiling. No man wants a little ninny. 457 00:35:14,029 --> 00:35:16,572 Ambrose, do a turn, let me see. 458 00:35:16,656 --> 00:35:19,909 Mr Hackl, Mr Tucker, don't forget Irene and Minnie, 459 00:35:19,993 --> 00:35:22,953 just forget you ever heard a word from me. 460 00:35:23,038 --> 00:35:26,248 All aboard! All aboard! 461 00:35:26,333 --> 00:35:30,544 All aboard! 462 00:35:33,048 --> 00:35:38,260 Put on your Sunday clothes, there's lots of world out there 463 00:35:39,054 --> 00:35:43,182 Put on your silk cravat and patent shoes 464 00:35:45,060 --> 00:35:50,314 We're gonna find adventure in the evening air 465 00:35:50,398 --> 00:35:53,150 To town we'll trot to a smoky spot 466 00:35:53,235 --> 00:35:56,737 Where the girls are hot as a fuse 467 00:35:57,072 --> 00:36:02,535 Put on your silk high hat and at the turned-up cuff 468 00:36:03,078 --> 00:36:05,704 We'll wear a handmade grey suede buttoned glove 469 00:36:05,789 --> 00:36:08,332 You're gonna take New York by storm 470 00:36:08,416 --> 00:36:11,335 We'll join the Astors at Tony Pastor's 471 00:36:11,419 --> 00:36:14,296 And this I'm positive of 472 00:36:14,381 --> 00:36:17,341 That we won't come home 473 00:36:17,425 --> 00:36:20,386 No, we won't come home 474 00:36:20,470 --> 00:36:30,312 No, we won't come home until we fall in love 475 00:36:45,412 --> 00:36:49,039 Do get done with that, Minnie. The men are eyeing us for the wrong reason. 476 00:36:49,124 --> 00:36:52,001 - A banana a day keeps the doctor away. - An apple a day. 477 00:36:52,085 --> 00:36:54,420 Do doctors slip on apple peels? 478 00:36:54,504 --> 00:36:57,673 - How are you, Miss Molloy? - If I felt any better I'd be indecent. 479 00:36:58,133 --> 00:37:00,968 - You are in a mood today. - I certainly am. 480 00:37:03,638 --> 00:37:07,433 Not that it's any of my business... Oh, but is it because? I mean... 481 00:37:07,517 --> 00:37:12,354 I don't mind that you never finish lunch, but I mind that you never finish sentences. 482 00:37:12,439 --> 00:37:15,232 Well, what I meant was, are you really going to? 483 00:37:15,317 --> 00:37:18,319 Silly girl, say it. Am I going to marry Horace Vandergelder? 484 00:37:18,403 --> 00:37:21,238 Yes, I'm seriously considering it, if he asks me. 485 00:37:21,323 --> 00:37:25,075 Oh, I'd rather die on the rack than ask you such a personal question, 486 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:27,119 but why would you? 487 00:37:27,203 --> 00:37:31,749 Because he's rich, that's why. He can rescue me from the millinery business. I hate hats. 488 00:37:31,833 --> 00:37:35,210 - Hate hats? - A good afternoon to you, Officer Gogarty. 489 00:37:36,713 --> 00:37:39,298 And the rest of the day to you, Miss Molloy. 490 00:37:39,382 --> 00:37:43,177 Ah, Minnie, why is it that all the attractive men in New York are married? 491 00:37:43,261 --> 00:37:45,179 Blarney, Miss Molloy! Blarney! 492 00:37:45,430 --> 00:37:47,056 Come on now, get going, all of you. 493 00:37:47,140 --> 00:37:48,682 (Irene and Minnie laugh) 494 00:37:51,853 --> 00:37:54,813 - Oh, the way you talk! - It's natural to talk about men. 495 00:37:54,898 --> 00:37:59,109 - I mean, what you said about hating hats. - Particularly the women who buy them. 496 00:37:59,486 --> 00:38:02,112 - You don't mean that. - Oh, yes, I do, Minnie Fay. 497 00:38:02,197 --> 00:38:06,116 All lady milliners are suspected of being wicked women. 498 00:38:06,201 --> 00:38:10,287 Half the time those dowagers who come in, come in merely to stare and wonder. 499 00:38:10,372 --> 00:38:11,580 Oh, how dare they! 500 00:38:11,665 --> 00:38:14,833 And if they were sure, they'd not set foot in the shop again. 501 00:38:14,918 --> 00:38:18,545 - Well, good riddance. Who needs them? - We do, unfortunately. 502 00:38:19,047 --> 00:38:22,466 So, do I go out to restaurants? No, it would be bad for business. 503 00:38:22,884 --> 00:38:25,344 Do I go to balls or theatres or operas? 504 00:38:25,428 --> 00:38:28,389 No, it would be bad for business. 505 00:38:28,932 --> 00:38:32,559 The only men I ever meet are the feather merchants who come to sell me things. 506 00:38:33,061 --> 00:38:35,437 Minnie, I'm tired of being suspected of being 507 00:38:35,522 --> 00:38:38,691 a wicked woman with nothing to show for it. 508 00:38:38,775 --> 00:38:40,359 Miss Molloy! 509 00:38:40,443 --> 00:38:42,361 Why does everybody have adventures but me? 510 00:38:42,445 --> 00:38:45,781 - Adventures? - Because I have no spirit, no gumption. 511 00:38:46,783 --> 00:38:50,452 Either I marry Horace Vandergelder or I'm gonna burn this shop down, 512 00:38:50,537 --> 00:38:53,747 break out like a fire engine and find myself some excitement. 513 00:38:54,332 --> 00:38:57,167 The things you're saying today. They're just awful. 514 00:38:57,252 --> 00:39:00,754 Oh, aren't they, though? And I'm enjoying every word of it. 515 00:39:01,756 --> 00:39:04,508 What's this? A return from Miss Mortimer again? 516 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:09,680 Same old story. She wants cherries and feathers. To catch a beau, I suppose. 517 00:39:09,764 --> 00:39:12,558 If you ask me, she'd do better with a heavy veil. 518 00:39:13,935 --> 00:39:17,521 I told her ribbons down the back is the thing to catch a gentleman's eye. 519 00:39:17,939 --> 00:39:20,190 But she'd have none of it. 520 00:39:20,275 --> 00:39:22,359 Minnie, make another hat for Miss Mortimer. 521 00:39:22,444 --> 00:39:23,777 I'm wearing this one myself. 522 00:39:24,946 --> 00:39:27,156 - Oh, but you can't. - Why not? 523 00:39:27,240 --> 00:39:31,201 Oh, because it's... it's provocative. That's why not. 524 00:39:31,327 --> 00:39:36,290 Well, who knows that "provocative" isn't just what I might wanna be today. 525 00:39:38,084 --> 00:39:41,503 I'll be wearing ribbons down my back 526 00:39:41,671 --> 00:39:44,548 This summer 527 00:39:45,300 --> 00:39:51,305 Blue and green and streaming in the yellow sky 528 00:39:52,307 --> 00:39:56,310 So if someone special comes my way 529 00:39:56,561 --> 00:39:59,480 This summer 530 00:40:00,148 --> 00:40:03,942 He might notice me 531 00:40:04,652 --> 00:40:08,197 Passing by 532 00:40:09,991 --> 00:40:18,499 And so I'll try to make it easier to find me 533 00:40:18,917 --> 00:40:23,420 In the stillness of July 534 00:40:25,006 --> 00:40:33,055 Because a breeze might stir a rainbow up behind me 535 00:40:33,431 --> 00:40:36,016 That might happen to catch 536 00:40:36,601 --> 00:40:40,521 The gentleman's eye 537 00:40:41,106 --> 00:40:48,695 And he might smile and take me by the hand 538 00:40:49,197 --> 00:40:52,366 This summer 539 00:40:54,953 --> 00:41:09,967 Making me recall how lovely love can be 540 00:41:10,885 --> 00:41:16,014 And so I will proudly wear 541 00:41:20,728 --> 00:41:26,275 Ribbons down my back 542 00:41:29,154 --> 00:41:34,992 Shining in my hair 543 00:41:37,871 --> 00:41:49,173 That he might notice me 544 00:41:55,263 --> 00:41:58,807 Miss Molloy, you don't love Horace Vandergelder, do you? 545 00:41:58,892 --> 00:42:02,644 - Of course I don't love him. - Then how can you... I mean? 546 00:42:02,729 --> 00:42:06,023 Minnie, look. There are two men staring at the shop. 547 00:42:06,107 --> 00:42:10,110 - Men? - Uh-huh. Aren't they delicious? 548 00:42:10,195 --> 00:42:11,987 You don't think? 549 00:42:12,071 --> 00:42:13,947 Yes, I do believe they mean to come in here. 550 00:42:14,032 --> 00:42:17,409 - Men in the shop? What'll we do? - Why, flirt with them, of course. 551 00:42:17,493 --> 00:42:19,828 - I'll give you the short one. - You're terrible. 552 00:42:19,913 --> 00:42:23,540 We'll heat them up and drop them cold. Good practice for married life. 553 00:42:23,625 --> 00:42:27,085 - Let's pretty ourselves up a bit. - If you say "vamp", I'll scream. 554 00:42:27,170 --> 00:42:28,879 - Vamp! - Agh! 555 00:42:31,341 --> 00:42:33,675 I must say, I like the tall one. 556 00:42:35,637 --> 00:42:36,929 Adventure, Barnaby. 557 00:42:37,013 --> 00:42:39,556 We can still catch the train back to Yonkers. 558 00:42:40,642 --> 00:42:42,226 I feel dizzy. 559 00:42:42,310 --> 00:42:44,895 Or go see the stuffed whale at the museum. 560 00:42:44,979 --> 00:42:46,480 Women, Barnaby. 561 00:42:47,273 --> 00:42:50,359 Stuffed women! 562 00:42:57,450 --> 00:42:59,117 There's no one here. We can leave. 563 00:43:00,662 --> 00:43:03,747 I'd never forgive myself. Agh! 564 00:43:05,375 --> 00:43:07,918 Are you sure this is an adventure, Cornelius? 565 00:43:08,002 --> 00:43:11,505 You don't have to ask. When you're in one, you'll know it all right. 566 00:43:11,589 --> 00:43:14,424 - How much money is left? - 40 cents for the train, 567 00:43:14,509 --> 00:43:17,302 30 cents for dinner and 20 cents to see the whale. 568 00:43:17,637 --> 00:43:20,264 Well, when they come out, we'll pretend we're rich. 569 00:43:20,348 --> 00:43:24,184 - That way we won't have to spend a thing. - Why not say that Mrs Levi sent us? 570 00:43:24,269 --> 00:43:27,020 No, we're not supposed to ever say that. Shh! 571 00:43:27,772 --> 00:43:31,608 We're two men about town looking for hats for ladies. 572 00:43:31,693 --> 00:43:33,318 What ladies? 573 00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:37,406 "Good afternoon, ma'am. Wonderful weather we're having." 574 00:43:38,032 --> 00:43:40,867 "How do you do, ma'am? And how are your hats?" 575 00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:44,538 "Charmed to make your acquaintance. Lovely place you have here." 576 00:43:44,622 --> 00:43:46,665 Good afternoon, gentlemen. 577 00:43:50,420 --> 00:43:53,130 - Cornelius Hackl here. - Barnaby Tucker here. 578 00:43:53,881 --> 00:43:55,882 Irene Molloy here. 579 00:43:57,302 --> 00:44:01,847 I'm very happy to meet you. Is there anything I can do for you? 580 00:44:08,146 --> 00:44:11,523 See, we're two ladies about town lookin' for hats to Molloy... 581 00:44:11,607 --> 00:44:15,777 We're hats, you see, and wondered if we could buy a lady or two to Molloy with for... 582 00:44:16,863 --> 00:44:20,532 We want a hat. Well, for a lady, of course. 583 00:44:20,616 --> 00:44:24,161 And everyone said to go to Miss Molloy's cos she's so pretty. 584 00:44:25,830 --> 00:44:28,415 I mean her hats are so pretty. 585 00:44:28,958 --> 00:44:33,420 And what sort of hat would Mrs Hackl be liking? 586 00:44:34,130 --> 00:44:36,590 Oh, no, Miss Molloy, there is no Mrs Hackl. 587 00:44:36,924 --> 00:44:39,051 Yes, there is. Your mother. 588 00:44:40,094 --> 00:44:41,887 She didn't mean that. 589 00:44:42,764 --> 00:44:46,933 - Did you, Miss Molloy? - Now, this lady friend of yours, 590 00:44:47,018 --> 00:44:49,978 couldn't she come in with you someday and choose the hat herself? 591 00:44:51,022 --> 00:44:53,565 Impossible. There is no lady friend. 592 00:44:54,609 --> 00:44:57,861 But I thought you said that you were coming here to choose... 593 00:44:57,945 --> 00:45:00,572 - I mean, she's Barnaby's. - Huh? What? 594 00:45:01,783 --> 00:45:06,328 Yes, but she lives in Yonkers and she said to pick out something reasonable. 595 00:45:06,412 --> 00:45:09,039 - Under a dollar. - Don't be silly, Barnaby. 596 00:45:09,123 --> 00:45:12,209 - Money's no object with us. None at all. - (Minnie coughs) 597 00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:17,214 Oh, this is my assistant, Miss Minnie Fay. Mr Hackl. Mr Tucker. 598 00:45:17,507 --> 00:45:20,967 - Good afternoon, ma'am. - Afternoon ma'am. 599 00:45:26,474 --> 00:45:30,477 Excuse me, Mr Tucker, did you say Yonkers? 600 00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:32,270 Yes, ma'am, we're from Yonkers. 601 00:45:33,564 --> 00:45:35,357 Well, are you? 602 00:45:35,942 --> 00:45:41,822 Yes. And, forgive me for saying this, but you should see Yonkers, Miss Molloy. 603 00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:46,618 Well, perhaps you and your gentleman friend here in New York might like to see it. 604 00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:49,996 Some say it's the most beautiful town in the world. 605 00:45:50,540 --> 00:45:53,041 - That's what they say. - So I've heard. 606 00:45:53,126 --> 00:45:56,294 But I'm afraid I don't have a gentleman friend here in New York. 607 00:45:56,379 --> 00:46:00,006 You don't? Barnaby, she doesn't have a gentleman friend. 608 00:46:01,092 --> 00:46:04,970 Hey, that's too bad. You know, if you should happen to have a Sunday free... 609 00:46:05,054 --> 00:46:09,141 You're Catholic, aren't you? Don't let that worry you. I'd be willing to change. 610 00:46:09,559 --> 00:46:12,519 If you're free in the near future, I'd... 611 00:46:13,354 --> 00:46:18,358 Well, we'd like to show you Yonkers from top to bottom. 612 00:46:18,443 --> 00:46:20,068 It's very historic. 613 00:46:20,153 --> 00:46:23,405 As a matter of fact, I might be there sooner than you think. 614 00:46:23,489 --> 00:46:26,366 - This Sunday? - I have a friend who lives in Yonkers. 615 00:46:26,534 --> 00:46:28,285 - You do? - Perhaps you know him. 616 00:46:28,369 --> 00:46:29,578 I do? 617 00:46:30,163 --> 00:46:33,748 It's always so foolish to ask in cases like that, isn't it? 618 00:46:33,833 --> 00:46:37,419 Why should you know him? It's a Mr Vandergelder. 619 00:46:37,503 --> 00:46:39,254 Mr Vandergelder? Oh! 620 00:46:39,755 --> 00:46:42,507 - Horace Vandergelder? - Of Vandergelder's Hay and Feed? 621 00:46:42,842 --> 00:46:46,887 - Yes. Do you know him? - (both) Oh, no! No! 622 00:46:46,971 --> 00:46:48,138 No, no, no, no, no, no... 623 00:46:48,222 --> 00:46:51,850 As a matter of fact, he's coming here to see me this very afternoon. 624 00:46:51,934 --> 00:46:53,768 - Coming here? - This afternoon? 625 00:46:53,853 --> 00:46:56,062 Cornelius! Cornelius, look! 626 00:46:57,440 --> 00:46:59,024 (Barnaby) It's a wolf trap. 627 00:46:59,734 --> 00:47:00,901 Look out! 628 00:47:02,737 --> 00:47:05,238 - Begging your pardon. - What are you doing? 629 00:47:05,323 --> 00:47:08,992 - We'll explain later. Help us just this once. - Come out of there this minute. 630 00:47:09,785 --> 00:47:11,536 We're as innocent as can be, Miss Molloy. 631 00:47:12,413 --> 00:47:16,291 Mr Hackl, Mr Tucker, I insist that you both come out or I'll be forced to... 632 00:47:16,375 --> 00:47:18,835 Mr Vandergelder, how nice to see you. 633 00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:22,964 - And Dolly Levi, what a surprise. - Irene, my darling, how well you look. 634 00:47:23,049 --> 00:47:25,967 - You must be in love. - Afternoon, Miss Molloy. 635 00:47:26,052 --> 00:47:29,095 What a pleasure to have you in New York, Mr Vandergelder. 636 00:47:29,222 --> 00:47:32,766 Yes, Yonkers lies up there decimated today. 637 00:47:33,434 --> 00:47:35,685 We thought we'd pay you a little visit, Irene. 638 00:47:36,145 --> 00:47:37,521 Unless it's inconvenient? 639 00:47:37,605 --> 00:47:41,399 Inconvenient? Whatever gave you that idea? 640 00:47:41,484 --> 00:47:46,696 Mr Vandergelder thought he saw two customers in the shop. Two, uh, men? 641 00:47:47,281 --> 00:47:50,951 Men? In a ladies' hat shop? 642 00:47:52,828 --> 00:47:56,081 Come, let's go into my workroom. I'm so eager for you to see it. 643 00:47:56,457 --> 00:47:59,501 - I've already seen it twice. - But I need your advice. 644 00:47:59,585 --> 00:48:03,922 Advice from Mr Vandergelder. The whole city should hear this and grow rich. 645 00:48:04,006 --> 00:48:07,259 Advice is cheap. It's what comes gift-wrapped that counts. 646 00:48:07,343 --> 00:48:12,097 - I have never heard it put more beautifully. - Thank you, Mr Vandergelder. 647 00:48:12,181 --> 00:48:16,560 Chocolate-covered peanuts. Unshelled. They're the expensive kind. 648 00:48:17,144 --> 00:48:21,064 - Why don't we open them in the workroom? - I've come here today 649 00:48:21,148 --> 00:48:23,733 because I've important business to discuss with you, 650 00:48:24,235 --> 00:48:27,153 just as soon as Mrs Levi says goodbye. 651 00:48:27,530 --> 00:48:30,657 Pay no attention to me. I'm just browsing. 652 00:48:30,741 --> 00:48:33,535 Business, Mr Vandergelder? The hay and feed business? 653 00:48:33,619 --> 00:48:36,830 - Well, not exactly. - A new hat shop in Yonkers? 654 00:48:37,164 --> 00:48:39,916 I hear it's a very beautiful city and quite historic, according... 655 00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:47,132 Yes, go on. Who's been telling you about Yonkers, may I ask? 656 00:48:47,675 --> 00:48:49,301 Nobody. A friend. 657 00:48:49,844 --> 00:48:51,094 What friend? 658 00:48:52,388 --> 00:48:53,847 Well, you see, he... 659 00:48:54,849 --> 00:48:58,852 - He? - Yes, uh... he... 660 00:48:59,061 --> 00:49:01,021 - His name, Miss Molloy? - What? 661 00:49:01,272 --> 00:49:02,689 His name? 662 00:49:03,149 --> 00:49:07,485 Oh, I believe it was... is... Mr Cornelius Hackl of Yonkers. 663 00:49:10,031 --> 00:49:13,366 - Cornelius Hackl? - Yes. Do you know him? 664 00:49:13,784 --> 00:49:15,952 - He's my head clerk. - He is? 665 00:49:16,329 --> 00:49:19,623 He's been with me for ten years. Where would you have known him? 666 00:49:19,707 --> 00:49:21,791 Ah, just one of those chance meetings. 667 00:49:21,876 --> 00:49:24,461 Yes, oh, yes, one of those chance meetings. 668 00:49:24,545 --> 00:49:28,715 Chance meetings? Cornelius Hackl has no right to chance meetings. Where was it? 669 00:49:29,091 --> 00:49:32,302 Really, it's very unlike you to question me in such a way. 670 00:49:32,386 --> 00:49:35,972 Well, the truth might as well come out now as later. 671 00:49:36,057 --> 00:49:37,849 Your head clerk is better known than you think. 672 00:49:37,933 --> 00:49:39,059 Nonsense. 673 00:49:39,143 --> 00:49:41,186 He's here all the time. He goes everywhere. 674 00:49:41,270 --> 00:49:43,688 He's well-liked. Everybody knows Cornelius Hackl. 675 00:49:43,981 --> 00:49:48,777 He never comes here. He works all day and then goes to sleep in the bran room at nine. 676 00:49:48,903 --> 00:49:52,322 - So you think, but it's not true. - Dolly Levi, you are mistaken. 677 00:49:52,615 --> 00:49:53,740 Horace Vandergelder, 678 00:49:53,824 --> 00:49:57,160 you keep your nose so deep in your accounts you don't know what goes on. 679 00:49:57,244 --> 00:50:00,538 By day, Cornelius Hackl is your faithful, trusted clerk, 680 00:50:00,623 --> 00:50:04,334 but by night... oh, by night... He leads a double life, that is all. 681 00:50:04,418 --> 00:50:08,588 Why, he is... why, he's... why, he's here... at the opera. 682 00:50:08,673 --> 00:50:12,217 At the great restaurants, in all the fashionable homes. 683 00:50:12,551 --> 00:50:15,220 He's even at the Harmonia Gardens three times a week. 684 00:50:15,304 --> 00:50:19,557 The fact is, Mr Vandergelder, he is the wittiest, the gayest, the naughtiest, 685 00:50:19,642 --> 00:50:25,271 most delightful man in New York City. He's the famous Cornelius Hackl. 686 00:50:26,023 --> 00:50:31,695 It ain't the same man. If I thought Cornelius Hackl came to New York, I'd discharge him. 687 00:50:31,779 --> 00:50:34,447 Who took the horses out of Jenny Lind's carriage and pulled her through the streets? 688 00:50:36,409 --> 00:50:40,954 Who dressed up as a waiter and took an oyster and dropped it right down? 689 00:50:41,455 --> 00:50:43,581 - It's too wicked. I can't say it. - Say it! 690 00:50:43,666 --> 00:50:47,252 - No, but it was Cornelius Hackl. - Where'd he get the money? 691 00:50:47,336 --> 00:50:50,422 - Oh, he's very rich. - Rich? I keep his money in my old safe. 692 00:50:50,506 --> 00:50:53,258 He has $145.36 693 00:50:53,342 --> 00:50:56,428 Oh, you are killing me. He is one of the Hackls. 694 00:50:56,512 --> 00:50:59,013 - The Hackls? - Yes, they built the Raritan Canal. 695 00:50:59,098 --> 00:51:01,266 - Then why work for me? - Well, I'll tell ya. 696 00:51:01,350 --> 00:51:04,644 I don't wanna hear it. I have a headache. It ain't the same man. 697 00:51:04,729 --> 00:51:08,523 He sleeps in my bran room. I just made him my chief clerk. 698 00:51:08,607 --> 00:51:13,987 If you had sense, you'd make him a partner. Irene, I can see you're quite taken with him. 699 00:51:14,071 --> 00:51:15,905 But I only met him once. 700 00:51:15,990 --> 00:51:17,699 Now, don't you be thinking of marrying him. 701 00:51:17,825 --> 00:51:21,953 - Darling, what are you saying? - He breaks hearts like hickory nuts. 702 00:51:22,037 --> 00:51:23,788 - (Horace) Who? - Cornelius Hackl. 703 00:51:24,498 --> 00:51:27,375 Miss Molloy, how long has he been calling on you? 704 00:51:27,460 --> 00:51:31,755 Mr Vandergelder, suppose I were to tell you that he has not been calling on me? 705 00:51:32,089 --> 00:51:34,674 - Excuse me. - Not now, Minnie. 706 00:51:42,141 --> 00:51:43,725 - Aaagh! - Stop singing. 707 00:51:43,809 --> 00:51:45,518 - There's a man! - That's not amusing. 708 00:51:45,978 --> 00:51:47,520 And we don't wish to be interrupted. 709 00:51:47,605 --> 00:51:50,356 Go back to the workroom immediately. Immediately. 710 00:51:51,192 --> 00:51:55,236 - The poor dear is tired from overwork. - If there's a man in there, we'll get him out! 711 00:51:56,071 --> 00:51:59,991 - Whoever you are, come out of there! - Do you realise what you're saying? 712 00:52:00,075 --> 00:52:02,494 - I certainly do. - Now just a minute. 713 00:52:02,578 --> 00:52:06,706 Before you make another move or say another word that you might regret, 714 00:52:07,082 --> 00:52:08,416 - allow me. - Dolly. 715 00:52:08,709 --> 00:52:10,084 Stand back. 716 00:52:16,967 --> 00:52:23,097 There, you see? So much for this nonsense about that darling girl hiding a man in there. 717 00:52:23,599 --> 00:52:26,810 I think we'll just forget you ever said it. It's forgotten. 718 00:52:26,894 --> 00:52:29,479 - (Cornelius sneezes) - Because there's nobody in there. 719 00:52:30,231 --> 00:52:32,232 - Atchoo! - God bless you. 720 00:52:43,077 --> 00:52:44,494 Miss Molloy? 721 00:52:45,037 --> 00:52:47,622 Yes, Mr Vandergelder, there is a man in there. 722 00:52:48,415 --> 00:52:52,126 - I see. - There also happens to be an explanation. 723 00:52:52,711 --> 00:52:57,131 For the present, I think I should just thank you for your visit and say good afternoon. 724 00:52:57,424 --> 00:52:58,716 (Barnaby sneezes) 725 00:52:59,343 --> 00:53:00,593 Atchoo! 726 00:53:03,806 --> 00:53:06,432 - Another? - Another. 727 00:53:06,934 --> 00:53:11,604 Good Lord, the whole room is crawling with men. Irene, darling, congratulations. 728 00:53:12,565 --> 00:53:17,944 Miss Molloy, I shan't trouble you again. And I hope vice versa. 729 00:53:20,114 --> 00:53:22,073 Horace, where are you going? 730 00:53:22,867 --> 00:53:27,120 To march in the 14th Street parade with the kind of people I can trust. 731 00:53:27,204 --> 00:53:29,038 700 men. 732 00:53:35,337 --> 00:53:36,713 Shut up! 733 00:53:49,226 --> 00:53:51,686 - Now. - (all talk at once) 734 00:53:52,146 --> 00:53:56,733 - Have you met Miss Minnie Fay? - Leave my shop or I'll call Officer Gogarty. 735 00:53:56,817 --> 00:53:58,568 Irene, there's no fun in the jailhouse. 736 00:53:58,652 --> 00:54:02,280 - (shouting) - Everybody, don't talk at once. 737 00:54:02,364 --> 00:54:04,782 - Just because you're rich... - Don't deny it. 738 00:54:04,867 --> 00:54:07,535 Doesn't mean you shouldn't make up for this. 739 00:54:07,620 --> 00:54:10,079 - We'll do anything. - This is Cornelius Hackl. 740 00:54:10,164 --> 00:54:13,166 - We've already met. How do you do? - Jail is absolutely out. 741 00:54:13,250 --> 00:54:16,294 - Cornelius, explain to her. - I'm Cornelius Hackl. 742 00:54:16,378 --> 00:54:19,005 - It seems to me... - Yes, the only way to make up for it... 743 00:54:19,548 --> 00:54:21,925 Irene, send for the law at once. 744 00:54:22,009 --> 00:54:24,093 You can have them put away for years on a charge like this. 745 00:54:24,178 --> 00:54:26,638 Help, police! Only, have dinner with them first. 746 00:54:26,722 --> 00:54:29,182 That's to show that you tried to settle amicably. 747 00:54:29,266 --> 00:54:32,602 That's how to do it. Dinner first, life imprisonment later. 748 00:54:32,686 --> 00:54:36,856 It'll be a lovely evening. Who knows what'll happen before you send them off to jail? 749 00:54:37,483 --> 00:54:39,400 - Mr Hackl? - Oh, by all means. 750 00:54:39,485 --> 00:54:43,780 - It's what we had in mind all along. - Minnie, we've been respectable for years. 751 00:54:43,864 --> 00:54:46,950 Now we're in disgrace, we might as well make the most of it. 752 00:54:47,034 --> 00:54:50,078 - It is the only sensible thing to do. - Cornelius... 753 00:54:52,081 --> 00:54:54,707 Now, I know a doughnut shop in the station. 754 00:54:54,792 --> 00:54:57,794 Doughnut shop? Certainly not. 755 00:54:57,878 --> 00:55:00,630 We want a fine dinner in a fashionable place. 756 00:55:00,714 --> 00:55:04,467 And I know just the place. The Harmonia Gardens on 14th Street. 757 00:55:04,551 --> 00:55:07,303 - Your favourite restaurant. - Wait a minute... 758 00:55:07,388 --> 00:55:11,641 The finest food that money can buy and a lovely orchestra. A polka contest tonight. 759 00:55:11,725 --> 00:55:15,645 - Ooh, dancing. - Rudolph will give you the best table. 760 00:55:15,729 --> 00:55:18,982 - We could never go there. - It sounds marvellous. 761 00:55:19,066 --> 00:55:22,944 Come, Minnie. We'll close the shop and take the whole afternoon off. 762 00:55:23,070 --> 00:55:25,071 Oh, I mean, we could never... 763 00:55:25,447 --> 00:55:29,158 Don't misunderstand me, it isn't the money or anything... 764 00:55:29,243 --> 00:55:31,577 It's the... the... 765 00:55:32,579 --> 00:55:34,330 What, Mr Hackl? 766 00:55:34,415 --> 00:55:37,125 It's the dancing. You see, I don't know how. 767 00:55:37,209 --> 00:55:40,837 And they have contests at the Harmonia... whatever it is. 768 00:55:40,921 --> 00:55:45,675 You said so yourself, and I don't know how. It would take weeks, months, years to learn. 769 00:55:46,635 --> 00:55:51,889 "Mrs Dolly Levi. 28 3/4-year-old chief clerks taught how to d..." 770 00:55:51,974 --> 00:55:55,643 Now, you just put one arm here and one arm there. 771 00:55:55,728 --> 00:55:58,271 It's no use. I have no sense of rhythm. 772 00:55:58,355 --> 00:56:00,064 Absolutely no sense of rhythm 773 00:56:00,149 --> 00:56:04,027 is the primary requirement for learning by the Levi method. 774 00:56:04,111 --> 00:56:07,488 Just give me five minutes. I'll have you dancing in the streets. 775 00:56:07,573 --> 00:56:09,782 I think we'll start with lesson seven: The waltz kick turn. 776 00:56:09,867 --> 00:56:13,494 Right foot, touch, left foot, touch, under, back, around, touch. 777 00:56:13,579 --> 00:56:17,040 Back, through, around, behind. Out, over... release... unfurl! 778 00:56:17,124 --> 00:56:20,626 Oh, oh, that's just absolutely wonderful, Mr Hackl. 779 00:56:21,128 --> 00:56:24,547 When I think of the lucky women who'll find heaven in your arms! 780 00:56:24,631 --> 00:56:26,841 I think we'll go back to lesson one, shall we? 781 00:56:27,801 --> 00:56:30,470 Put your hand on her waist 782 00:56:31,221 --> 00:56:32,555 and stand, 783 00:56:33,557 --> 00:56:38,186 with her right in your left hand. 784 00:56:39,146 --> 00:56:40,563 And... 785 00:56:41,982 --> 00:56:44,650 One. That's right. 786 00:56:44,985 --> 00:56:49,697 And one, two, three. 787 00:56:49,782 --> 00:56:50,990 Ah! 788 00:56:51,825 --> 00:56:55,453 One, two, three. 789 00:56:55,537 --> 00:57:01,834 Oh, no. This one. And one, two, three. 790 00:57:02,795 --> 00:57:06,547 One, two, three. 791 00:57:07,091 --> 00:57:09,634 Look! I'm dancing! 792 00:57:11,512 --> 00:57:14,430 - I was. - Of course you were, Mr Hackl. 793 00:57:15,224 --> 00:57:22,396 Take the someone whose arms you're in 794 00:57:23,649 --> 00:57:26,192 Hold on to her tight 795 00:57:26,276 --> 00:57:28,277 And spin 796 00:57:28,362 --> 00:57:31,280 And one, two, three 797 00:57:31,365 --> 00:57:34,867 One, two, three 798 00:57:35,244 --> 00:57:37,245 Look! I'm dancing! 799 00:57:37,579 --> 00:57:39,956 Ah! Come here. 800 00:57:40,290 --> 00:57:44,502 Turn around and turn around, try floating through the air 801 00:57:44,962 --> 00:57:47,713 Can't you be a little more aesthetic? 802 00:57:48,632 --> 00:57:52,426 Don't you think my dancing has a polish and a flair? 803 00:57:53,011 --> 00:57:55,513 The word I think I'd use is athletic. 804 00:57:56,265 --> 00:57:59,725 Well, my heart is about to burst 805 00:58:00,435 --> 00:58:03,396 My head is about to pop 806 00:58:03,730 --> 00:58:09,360 And now that I'm dancing who cares if I ever stop? 807 00:58:09,736 --> 00:58:11,028 That's wonderful. 808 00:58:11,405 --> 00:58:17,034 Look, everybody! I, Cornelius Hackl, sport, I'm dancing! 809 00:58:19,037 --> 00:58:21,080 You're next, Mr Tucker. 810 00:58:24,626 --> 00:58:28,504 Glide and step 811 00:58:29,131 --> 00:58:34,427 And then step and glide 812 00:58:35,554 --> 00:58:38,556 And everyone stand aside! 813 00:58:38,640 --> 00:58:43,477 Not... not yet, Mr Tucker. One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three, one... 814 00:58:43,562 --> 00:58:46,939 - Look! He's dancing! - I think he's holdin' out on us. 815 00:58:47,441 --> 00:58:51,277 You could learn to polka if you worked a week or so 816 00:58:51,361 --> 00:58:54,780 Or the tango filled with passion seething 817 00:58:55,282 --> 00:58:59,202 I might join the chorus of the Castle Garden show 818 00:58:59,536 --> 00:59:01,662 Whatever you do, Mr Tucker, keep breathing. 819 00:59:02,206 --> 00:59:05,458 For my heart is about to burst 820 00:59:06,251 --> 00:59:09,045 My head is about to pop 821 00:59:09,463 --> 00:59:14,800 And now that we're dancing who cares if we ever stop? 822 00:59:17,471 --> 00:59:18,804 Oh. 823 01:01:19,426 --> 01:01:23,637 When there's someone you hardly know 824 01:01:23,722 --> 01:01:27,016 And wish you were closer to 825 01:01:27,100 --> 01:01:34,607 Remember that he can be near to you while you're dancing 826 01:01:35,942 --> 01:01:40,196 Though you've only just said hello 827 01:01:40,280 --> 01:01:48,204 She's suddenly someone who can make all your daydreams appear to you 828 01:01:48,288 --> 01:01:51,499 While you're dancing 829 01:01:53,251 --> 01:01:56,253 Make the music weave a spell 830 01:01:56,797 --> 01:01:59,590 Whirl away your worry 831 01:02:00,384 --> 01:02:03,928 Things look almost twice as well 832 01:02:04,012 --> 01:02:06,931 When they're slightly blurry 833 01:02:07,015 --> 01:02:10,601 As around and around you go 834 01:02:10,977 --> 01:02:13,813 Your spirits will hit the top 835 01:02:13,897 --> 01:02:18,275 And now that we're dancing who cares if we ever stop? 836 01:02:18,360 --> 01:02:21,862 One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three 837 01:02:21,947 --> 01:02:26,325 And now that we're dancing who cares if we ever stop? 838 01:05:04,317 --> 01:05:05,484 Dolly! 839 01:05:06,778 --> 01:05:10,614 Dolly, Cornelius is taking us to see the parade. Everyone will be marching. 840 01:05:10,699 --> 01:05:16,287 - Come on, Mrs Levi. - Dolly, the world is full of wonderful things. 841 01:05:20,083 --> 01:05:22,585 Hurry, before the parade passes by! 842 01:05:23,962 --> 01:05:26,088 Yes, I will. I will. 843 01:05:38,518 --> 01:05:40,644 Before the parade passes by. 844 01:05:43,023 --> 01:05:46,525 Before it all moves on 845 01:05:47,694 --> 01:05:50,070 And only I'm left 846 01:05:51,573 --> 01:05:58,412 Before the parade passes by 847 01:05:59,998 --> 01:06:02,249 I've got to get in step 848 01:06:03,293 --> 01:06:06,545 While there's still time left 849 01:06:08,048 --> 01:06:15,346 I'm ready to move out in front 850 01:06:16,556 --> 01:06:23,562 Life without life has no reason or rhyme left 851 01:06:25,982 --> 01:06:28,400 With the rest of them 852 01:06:29,361 --> 01:06:32,321 With the best of them 853 01:06:32,947 --> 01:06:40,913 I wanna hold my head up high 854 01:06:41,414 --> 01:06:44,625 I need a goal again 855 01:06:44,709 --> 01:06:48,170 I need a drive again 856 01:06:48,254 --> 01:06:56,762 I wanna feel my heart coming alive again 857 01:06:59,391 --> 01:07:06,605 Before the parade 858 01:07:08,692 --> 01:07:13,278 Passes by 859 01:07:21,913 --> 01:07:24,581 Ephraim, let me go. 860 01:07:26,793 --> 01:07:28,794 It's been long enough, Ephraim. 861 01:07:31,172 --> 01:07:39,263 Every night, just like you'd want me to, I've put out the cat, made myself a rum toddy, 862 01:07:40,181 --> 01:07:45,227 and, before I went to bed, said a little prayer thanking God that I was independent. 863 01:07:46,187 --> 01:07:51,233 That no one else's life was mixed up with mine. 864 01:07:54,237 --> 01:07:55,738 But lately, Ephraim, 865 01:07:56,948 --> 01:07:58,991 I've begun to realise that 866 01:08:00,785 --> 01:08:05,831 for a long time I have not shed one tear. 867 01:08:07,667 --> 01:08:11,170 Nor have I been for one moment 868 01:08:12,505 --> 01:08:14,590 outrageously happy. 869 01:08:15,884 --> 01:08:21,513 Now, Horace Vandergelder, he's always saying the world is full of fools. 870 01:08:22,474 --> 01:08:26,894 And in a way, he's right, isn't he? I mean, himself, Cornelius, Irene, myself... 871 01:08:27,687 --> 01:08:33,233 But there comes a time when you've got to decide if you want to be a fool among fools, 872 01:08:34,194 --> 01:08:35,944 or a fool alone. 873 01:08:37,530 --> 01:08:39,865 Well, I have made that decision, Ephraim, 874 01:08:40,533 --> 01:08:45,871 but I would feel so much better about it if... if you could just give me a sign, 875 01:08:45,955 --> 01:08:48,499 any kind of a sign that you approve. 876 01:08:49,501 --> 01:08:51,043 I'm going back, Ephraim. 877 01:08:51,878 --> 01:08:54,713 I've decided to join the human race again. 878 01:08:55,423 --> 01:09:00,052 And, Ephraim, I want you to give me away. 879 01:09:01,554 --> 01:09:06,725 Before the parade passes by 880 01:09:07,018 --> 01:09:11,772 I've got to go and taste Saturday's high life 881 01:09:12,148 --> 01:09:16,985 Before the parade passes by 882 01:09:17,487 --> 01:09:22,074 I've got to get some life back into my life 883 01:09:22,158 --> 01:09:26,411 I'm ready to move out in front 884 01:09:26,996 --> 01:09:31,333 I've had enough of just passing by life 885 01:09:31,417 --> 01:09:33,418 With the rest of them 886 01:09:33,503 --> 01:09:35,546 With the best of them 887 01:09:35,630 --> 01:09:39,550 I can hold my head up high 888 01:09:39,634 --> 01:09:41,844 For I've got a goal again 889 01:09:41,928 --> 01:09:43,846 I've got a drive again 890 01:09:43,930 --> 01:09:48,016 I'm gonna feel my heart coming alive again 891 01:09:48,101 --> 01:09:51,436 Before the parade 892 01:09:52,564 --> 01:09:56,108 Passes by 893 01:10:05,785 --> 01:10:07,786 (cheering) 894 01:11:36,918 --> 01:11:40,128 Waah! Waah! 895 01:11:47,595 --> 01:11:54,434 Present arms! 896 01:12:24,465 --> 01:12:26,049 Dolly Levi! 897 01:12:26,759 --> 01:12:27,968 Hi! 898 01:12:28,678 --> 01:12:30,220 Gussie Granger? 899 01:12:31,014 --> 01:12:32,889 What are you doing here? 900 01:12:32,974 --> 01:12:35,434 Earning an honest dollar, which is more than I've made 901 01:12:35,518 --> 01:12:37,769 on a legitimate stage in two years. 902 01:12:37,854 --> 01:12:40,647 Pity on you. But the meat packers' float? 903 01:12:40,857 --> 01:12:44,443 Ha! Listen, if there was more money in it, I'd play one of the pigs. 904 01:13:01,169 --> 01:13:03,378 I came here for some privacy. 905 01:13:03,796 --> 01:13:07,799 I owe you an apology and I didn't want to let it go another minute. 906 01:13:07,884 --> 01:13:09,760 You owe me the fee I gave you 907 01:13:09,844 --> 01:13:12,345 for getting me tangled up with that collector of men's hats. 908 01:13:12,430 --> 01:13:15,390 Yes, Irene, she was a disappointment, darling girl. 909 01:13:15,475 --> 01:13:19,352 I'll have you know the confectioner gave me back every cent for the peanuts. 910 01:13:19,437 --> 01:13:22,064 I'm sorry. I never give cash refunds. 911 01:13:22,148 --> 01:13:26,526 However, being a woman who believes in giving service that's been paid for, 912 01:13:26,611 --> 01:13:30,447 - I've arranged to make it up to you. - Let me make one thing clear. 913 01:13:30,531 --> 01:13:34,284 You have been discharged as my marriage broker. I have no use for one. 914 01:13:34,368 --> 01:13:37,204 From now on, you are just a woman like anyone else. 915 01:13:37,288 --> 01:13:39,748 - I am? - And I'm just a man like anyone else, 916 01:13:39,832 --> 01:13:44,711 and, like anyone else, I'll do what I can to avoid the introductions you specialise in. 917 01:13:44,796 --> 01:13:49,925 Well, I can understand your feelings, and I am here today, marching beside you, 918 01:13:50,009 --> 01:13:54,596 to assure you that there will be no further need for my services after dinner tonight. 919 01:13:57,183 --> 01:13:59,559 - Dinner? - 7.30 at the Harmonia Gardens. 920 01:13:59,644 --> 01:14:02,187 It's all arranged. Private room. She'll be waiting. 921 01:14:02,897 --> 01:14:06,525 - Who? Who-who-who'll be waiting? - Who-who-who'll be waiting? 922 01:14:06,609 --> 01:14:08,610 The very rich, very beautiful lady I referred to 923 01:14:08,694 --> 01:14:10,821 when I saw you in Yonkers this morning. 924 01:14:11,656 --> 01:14:14,282 The heiress to a fortune, remember? 925 01:14:14,367 --> 01:14:15,909 (whistle blows) 926 01:14:17,954 --> 01:14:20,539 I'm not interested. What's her name? 927 01:14:20,623 --> 01:14:22,624 Uh... Ernestina. 928 01:14:23,376 --> 01:14:25,627 I'm not interested. What's her last name? 929 01:14:26,462 --> 01:14:29,923 Simple... uh, Simple. Ernestina Simple. 930 01:14:31,050 --> 01:14:33,677 - Can she cook? - Can she cook? 931 01:14:33,761 --> 01:14:37,681 Frankly, I never understood why a girl who could afford every servant around 932 01:14:37,765 --> 01:14:41,143 makes all her own meals, on a solid gold stove. 933 01:14:41,644 --> 01:14:45,522 - She's a fool. I'm not interested in fools. - Neither am I. Good day. 934 01:14:45,606 --> 01:14:48,316 - Good day. - Don't forget. 7.30, Harmonia Gardens. 935 01:14:48,401 --> 01:14:50,819 And rent some evening clothes. She's fussy. 936 01:14:50,987 --> 01:14:54,406 Dolly Levi, you are a damned exasperating woman! 937 01:14:55,032 --> 01:14:59,911 Why, Horace Vandergelder, that is the nicest thing you have ever said to me. 938 01:15:06,085 --> 01:15:10,255 When the parade passes by 939 01:15:10,339 --> 01:15:14,384 Listen and hear that brass harmony growing 940 01:15:14,468 --> 01:15:18,471 When the parade passes by 941 01:15:18,556 --> 01:15:22,726 Pardon me if my old spirit is showing 942 01:15:22,810 --> 01:15:26,855 All of those lights over there 943 01:15:26,939 --> 01:15:30,775 Seem to be telling me where I'm going 944 01:15:31,110 --> 01:15:33,195 When the whistles blow 945 01:15:33,279 --> 01:15:35,280 And the cymbals crash 946 01:15:35,364 --> 01:15:39,367 And the sparklers light the sky 947 01:15:39,452 --> 01:15:41,369 I'm gonna raise the roof 948 01:15:41,454 --> 01:15:43,538 I'm gonna carry on 949 01:15:43,623 --> 01:15:45,707 Give me an old trombone 950 01:15:45,791 --> 01:15:47,542 Give me an old baton 951 01:15:47,627 --> 01:15:51,213 Before the parade 952 01:15:52,006 --> 01:16:00,472 Passes by 953 01:16:29,293 --> 01:16:33,588 ("Before the Parade Passes By" instrumental) 954 01:18:18,694 --> 01:18:20,904 ("Put On Your Sunday Clothes" instrumental) 955 01:18:44,512 --> 01:18:47,680 Cornelius, are you sure they're just changing their clothes? 956 01:18:47,765 --> 01:18:52,435 - Don't worry, they'll be here. - I get dressed in less than three minutes. 957 01:18:54,230 --> 01:18:56,773 - Women wear more. - They do? 958 01:18:57,817 --> 01:18:59,150 Underneath. 959 01:19:00,277 --> 01:19:03,071 Cornelius, maybe we should leave while there's time. 960 01:19:03,155 --> 01:19:05,031 - Never. - We've seen everything. 961 01:19:05,116 --> 01:19:08,743 The parade, the Statue of Liberty, the stuffed whale at Barnum's museum. 962 01:19:08,828 --> 01:19:12,747 - I could die a happy man now. - It'll be worth it, no matter what happens. 963 01:19:12,832 --> 01:19:15,458 The worst anybody can do is put us in jail. 964 01:19:15,793 --> 01:19:19,087 But as long as we live we'll never forget 965 01:19:19,171 --> 01:19:25,176 the night we took Irene Molloy and Minnie Fay to dinner at Harmonia Gardens, 966 01:19:25,719 --> 01:19:29,180 - on less than a dollar. - Cornelius, wake up. 967 01:19:29,265 --> 01:19:31,724 And there's another reason we can't go back. 968 01:19:31,809 --> 01:19:34,269 One more thing we promised to do 969 01:19:34,353 --> 01:19:37,147 before we go and turn into a couple of Vandergelders. 970 01:19:37,231 --> 01:19:41,192 Cornelius! You're not thinking of kissing Miss Molloy? 971 01:19:41,944 --> 01:19:44,404 - Maybe. - She'll scream. 972 01:19:45,322 --> 01:19:48,450 Barnaby, you don't know anything about women. 973 01:19:48,534 --> 01:19:52,996 - Only that we can't afford 'em. - You should know that everyone except us 974 01:19:53,080 --> 01:19:56,207 goes through life kissing right and left all the time. 975 01:19:57,877 --> 01:19:59,085 They do? 976 01:19:59,712 --> 01:20:00,879 Yes. 977 01:20:02,214 --> 01:20:04,340 I often wondered about that. 978 01:20:07,219 --> 01:20:08,386 (both gasp) 979 01:20:12,224 --> 01:20:14,809 - Smile, Barnaby. - I'm smiling. 980 01:20:14,894 --> 01:20:18,646 - Look rich and gay and charming. - I'm looking gay and charming. 981 01:20:22,234 --> 01:20:23,485 Hello. 982 01:20:27,281 --> 01:20:29,324 - Here we are. - Hello. 983 01:20:32,453 --> 01:20:33,786 Cornelius. 984 01:20:34,663 --> 01:20:37,499 Haa... I'm pleased to meet you, Miss Molloy. 985 01:20:37,583 --> 01:20:40,919 No last names. After all we've been through together this afternoon, 986 01:20:41,003 --> 01:20:42,837 it's Irene and Minnie. 987 01:20:44,381 --> 01:20:45,882 Irene. 988 01:20:46,926 --> 01:20:49,427 - Ohh... - Ohhh... 989 01:20:50,137 --> 01:20:53,139 - Does that count, Cornelius? - I don't think so. 990 01:20:53,432 --> 01:20:54,766 Count? 991 01:20:55,267 --> 01:20:58,269 You see, we were counting here, while we were waiting. 992 01:20:58,687 --> 01:21:01,356 I hear all rich people do nothing but count their money. 993 01:21:02,691 --> 01:21:06,361 I'm so hungry. Why don't we go in here and have some hors d'oeuvres first? 994 01:21:06,695 --> 01:21:08,821 - No, no, no. - It's very fashionable. 995 01:21:08,906 --> 01:21:12,033 - It would spoil our appetites. - Or we could have an apéritif. 996 01:21:12,117 --> 01:21:16,329 It's out of the question. Barnaby and I don't agree with that sort of thing. 997 01:21:16,413 --> 01:21:20,166 - But all those people do. - Well, they simply don't know that a... 998 01:21:21,126 --> 01:21:25,630 ...a... péritif is no longer considered elegant. 999 01:21:26,131 --> 01:21:29,133 - Oh, it isn't? - Hasn't been for years. 1000 01:21:29,218 --> 01:21:32,887 In that case, it's on to Harmonia Gardens for dinner. Call a hack. 1001 01:21:32,972 --> 01:21:36,015 - Hack? - All my life I've wanted to ride in a hack. 1002 01:21:36,100 --> 01:21:39,561 - Oh, there's one. Yoo-hoo! - No, no. We can't do that. 1003 01:21:40,771 --> 01:21:43,690 I mean, it isn't the money or anything 1004 01:21:44,650 --> 01:21:51,030 it's just that, nowadays, really elegant people never take hacks. 1005 01:21:51,115 --> 01:21:53,866 - Hacks is out. - They all go by streetcar. 1006 01:21:53,951 --> 01:21:56,077 Then, by all means, we go by streetcar. 1007 01:21:56,161 --> 01:21:58,788 I've been elegant all my life and I never knew it. 1008 01:21:58,872 --> 01:22:02,792 Of course, if you really want to be really elegant... 1009 01:22:02,876 --> 01:22:04,085 - Oh, we do. - We do. 1010 01:22:05,963 --> 01:22:06,921 You'll walk. 1011 01:22:14,013 --> 01:22:15,888 Yes, New York 1012 01:22:15,973 --> 01:22:19,934 It's really us: Barnaby and Cornelius 1013 01:22:20,019 --> 01:22:25,815 All the guests of Mr Hackl are feeling great and look spectacular 1014 01:22:25,899 --> 01:22:27,650 What a knack 1015 01:22:27,735 --> 01:22:31,779 There is to that acting like a born aristocrat 1016 01:22:31,864 --> 01:22:34,032 We got elegance 1017 01:22:34,116 --> 01:22:36,951 If you ain't got elegance 1018 01:22:37,036 --> 01:22:41,039 You can never, ever carry it off 1019 01:22:52,593 --> 01:22:55,511 All who are well-bred agree 1020 01:22:55,596 --> 01:22:58,431 Minnie Fay has pedigree 1021 01:22:58,515 --> 01:23:01,351 Exercise your wildest whims tonight 1022 01:23:01,435 --> 01:23:04,312 We are out with Diamond Jims tonight 1023 01:23:04,396 --> 01:23:07,315 Could they be misleading us? 1024 01:23:07,399 --> 01:23:10,276 Silver spoons were used for feeding us 1025 01:23:10,361 --> 01:23:12,445 We got elegance 1026 01:23:12,529 --> 01:23:15,490 If you ain't got elegance 1027 01:23:15,574 --> 01:23:19,869 You can never, ever carry it off 1028 01:23:29,880 --> 01:23:31,589 (dog barks) 1029 01:23:33,759 --> 01:23:35,635 Snobs that slobs 1030 01:23:35,719 --> 01:23:38,388 Throw roses at. We look down 1031 01:23:38,472 --> 01:23:39,597 Our noses at 1032 01:23:39,682 --> 01:23:42,517 Pity all the other girls around 1033 01:23:42,601 --> 01:23:45,603 When I swing my perfect pearls around 1034 01:23:45,688 --> 01:23:48,398 Snubbing folks is chic to us 1035 01:23:48,482 --> 01:23:51,442 Sometimes we don't even speak to us 1036 01:23:53,570 --> 01:23:56,406 If you ain't got elegance 1037 01:23:56,490 --> 01:24:00,326 You can never, ever carry it off 1038 01:24:00,536 --> 01:24:02,245 If you please. 1039 01:24:23,392 --> 01:24:26,269 Middle class don't speak of it 1040 01:24:26,353 --> 01:24:29,105 Savoir-faire, we reek of it 1041 01:24:29,189 --> 01:24:31,733 Some were born with rags and patches 1042 01:24:31,817 --> 01:24:35,027 But we use dollar bills for matches and 1043 01:24:35,112 --> 01:24:37,905 Vanderbilt kowtows to us 1044 01:24:37,990 --> 01:24:40,908 JP Morgan scrapes and bows to us 1045 01:24:40,993 --> 01:24:43,119 We got elegance 1046 01:24:43,203 --> 01:24:47,081 We were born with elegance 1047 01:24:47,624 --> 01:24:50,293 I behave like Walter Raleigh 1048 01:24:50,377 --> 01:24:53,296 When the streets are full of mud 1049 01:24:53,380 --> 01:24:55,590 And the bluest huckleberry 1050 01:24:55,674 --> 01:24:58,509 Isn't bluer than my blood 1051 01:24:59,011 --> 01:25:01,971 Have you noticed when I hold my cup 1052 01:25:02,055 --> 01:25:04,515 The saucer never moves 1053 01:25:05,184 --> 01:25:08,311 And the way I keep my pinkie up 1054 01:25:08,395 --> 01:25:13,649 Indubitably proves that 1055 01:25:13,776 --> 01:25:15,860 We got elegance 1056 01:25:15,944 --> 01:25:18,738 We got built-in elegance 1057 01:25:18,822 --> 01:25:20,531 And with elegance 1058 01:25:20,616 --> 01:25:22,575 Elegance, elegance, elegance 1059 01:25:22,659 --> 01:25:24,786 Elegance 1060 01:25:25,287 --> 01:25:29,415 We'll carry it off 1061 01:26:26,056 --> 01:26:28,349 Horace, Horace Vandergelder 1062 01:26:29,268 --> 01:26:33,646 Mrs Horace Vandergelder 1063 01:26:34,940 --> 01:26:39,151 Just leave everything to me 1064 01:26:41,071 --> 01:26:45,491 Though it won't be like the first time 1065 01:26:46,285 --> 01:26:51,247 How can it be like the first time? 1066 01:26:52,666 --> 01:26:59,505 But why does it have to be? 1067 01:27:03,802 --> 01:27:08,806 Don't look for shooting stars 1068 01:27:10,350 --> 01:27:14,645 For love is only love 1069 01:27:15,856 --> 01:27:26,616 You touch, and still you touch the ground 1070 01:27:27,743 --> 01:27:33,581 Don't listen for those bells 1071 01:27:33,665 --> 01:27:39,378 For love is only love 1072 01:27:40,380 --> 01:27:44,759 And if it's love you've found 1073 01:27:44,843 --> 01:27:52,391 Your heart won't hear a sound 1074 01:27:54,186 --> 01:28:00,358 And when you hold his hand 1075 01:28:02,194 --> 01:28:05,196 You only hold his hand 1076 01:28:06,573 --> 01:28:12,912 The violins are all a bluff 1077 01:28:13,705 --> 01:28:19,043 But if you're really wise 1078 01:28:19,628 --> 01:28:25,716 The silence of his eyes 1079 01:28:25,801 --> 01:28:30,930 Will tell you love is only love 1080 01:28:32,724 --> 01:28:39,063 And it's wonderful enough 1081 01:28:43,110 --> 01:28:48,239 Without the shooting stars 1082 01:28:49,449 --> 01:28:54,245 Without the sound of bells 1083 01:28:54,955 --> 01:28:59,750 Without the violins 1084 01:29:00,335 --> 01:29:06,340 Love is wonderful 1085 01:29:07,551 --> 01:29:15,099 Enough 1086 01:29:43,128 --> 01:29:45,254 Good evening. Good evening. 1087 01:29:48,425 --> 01:29:50,468 Straighten up. Walk erect. 1088 01:29:52,429 --> 01:29:54,847 Pleasure. Good evening. 1089 01:29:55,766 --> 01:29:57,725 How nice to see you. 1090 01:29:59,227 --> 01:30:02,772 Psst! No expression. Let the food smile. 1091 01:30:04,024 --> 01:30:05,983 And how are you this evening? 1092 01:30:07,360 --> 01:30:09,236 Charming, charming. 1093 01:30:09,696 --> 01:30:11,322 You! You there! 1094 01:30:11,865 --> 01:30:13,657 Come up here at once. 1095 01:30:15,160 --> 01:30:16,452 Yes, you. 1096 01:30:18,205 --> 01:30:20,706 How dare you keep me standing here this long? 1097 01:30:20,791 --> 01:30:24,668 As soon as Mr Vandergelder arrives, you will be seated, Miss Simple. 1098 01:30:24,753 --> 01:30:26,504 Now look here, garçon. 1099 01:30:26,588 --> 01:30:29,965 My name is Rudolph. Rudolph Reisenweber. 1100 01:30:30,050 --> 01:30:33,427 And why, may I ask, can I not wait at the table? 1101 01:30:33,512 --> 01:30:35,429 Please. Please. 1102 01:30:36,431 --> 01:30:40,935 Harmonia Gardens does not consider it proper, a lady alone. 1103 01:30:41,019 --> 01:30:45,439 - Perhaps if you'll let me take your wrap. - Ohh! Don't touch me. 1104 01:30:46,983 --> 01:30:48,317 Where? 1105 01:30:48,860 --> 01:30:51,529 - If you will excuse me. - Certainly not. 1106 01:30:54,324 --> 01:30:56,534 Yes? What can I do for you? 1107 01:30:56,618 --> 01:30:59,453 How are ya, Adolf? How's my old friend? 1108 01:30:59,538 --> 01:31:02,456 - I am Rudolph. - Oh, of course. 1109 01:31:03,416 --> 01:31:04,959 Rudolph. 1110 01:31:05,627 --> 01:31:08,754 We'd like a little something to eat. You know? 1111 01:31:09,297 --> 01:31:12,550 In what name is the reservation, please? 1112 01:31:12,634 --> 01:31:15,636 - Reservation? - I'm afraid there is nothing available. 1113 01:31:15,720 --> 01:31:17,930 - Come on, let's go. - Do you know who he is? 1114 01:31:18,223 --> 01:31:20,975 This is Cornelius Hackl. The Cornelius Hackl. 1115 01:31:21,059 --> 01:31:25,062 - Tell him about the Rockefellers. - The Rockefellers? I see. 1116 01:31:25,147 --> 01:31:27,648 Look, I know a little place up the block. 1117 01:31:27,732 --> 01:31:33,362 I think I have something. Yes, I think I have something. Follow me, if you will. 1118 01:31:46,042 --> 01:31:47,626 Dining room number two. 1119 01:31:48,086 --> 01:31:50,629 - It is the last one. Very private. - It is? 1120 01:31:50,714 --> 01:31:52,423 - Very exclusive. - It is? 1121 01:31:52,507 --> 01:31:55,467 - Very fashionable. - Don't say another word. 1122 01:31:55,552 --> 01:31:57,595 And very expensive. 1123 01:31:58,180 --> 01:31:59,763 That was the word. 1124 01:32:01,474 --> 01:32:04,185 - How beautiful! - How elegant! 1125 01:32:04,269 --> 01:32:05,561 How much? 1126 01:32:05,645 --> 01:32:08,314 Cornelius, I thought you said everyone knew you. 1127 01:32:08,398 --> 01:32:10,941 Oh, don't worry. They will after tonight. 1128 01:32:14,070 --> 01:32:17,865 - (whispers) - She is? She is? I don't believe it! 1129 01:32:18,200 --> 01:32:21,035 Eight o'clock, table for two, and a chicken. 1130 01:32:21,119 --> 01:32:25,372 Mrs Dolly Levi coming here after such a long absence! 1131 01:32:25,457 --> 01:32:27,208 It is too happy to be true. 1132 01:32:27,292 --> 01:32:29,084 That's the message she told me to give you. 1133 01:32:29,169 --> 01:32:31,212 Who? Who are these people? 1134 01:32:33,256 --> 01:32:34,965 They look truthful. 1135 01:32:38,303 --> 01:32:43,224 If you're gonna spend all evening acting like a scared rabbit, maybe I'll order lettuce. 1136 01:32:43,308 --> 01:32:45,643 Oh, how can you be so brave? It's unfair. 1137 01:32:45,936 --> 01:32:48,395 Just try to keep remembering Mrs Levi's advice. 1138 01:32:48,688 --> 01:32:52,775 I only wanted to marry you, not perform in public. 1139 01:32:52,859 --> 01:32:56,403 - There's nobody here who knows us. - Oh, Ambrose, are you sure? 1140 01:32:56,488 --> 01:32:58,989 Sweetheart, have I ever been wrong? 1141 01:33:14,839 --> 01:33:16,090 Sir? 1142 01:33:17,550 --> 01:33:20,427 - Vandergelder's the name. - Yes, Mr Vandergelder. 1143 01:33:21,846 --> 01:33:25,599 There's a Miss Ernestina Simple supposed to be waiting. 1144 01:33:25,684 --> 01:33:27,518 Right there, Mr Vandergelder. 1145 01:33:29,854 --> 01:33:32,273 No, you didn't understand what I said... 1146 01:33:32,357 --> 01:33:36,360 But perfectly. Mr Vandergelder is here, Miss Simple. 1147 01:33:37,028 --> 01:33:39,196 Yes, so I see. 1148 01:33:42,367 --> 01:33:46,453 - Oh, good evening, Miss Simple. - I hope so, Mr Vandergelder. 1149 01:33:47,038 --> 01:33:50,874 - All right, my good man. - Fritz, private dining room number one. 1150 01:33:51,251 --> 01:33:53,711 - Follow me, if you will. - You may take my arm. 1151 01:33:55,380 --> 01:33:59,925 And, unless you are suffering from a head cold, kindly remove your hat. 1152 01:34:07,892 --> 01:34:09,101 Achtung! 1153 01:34:10,645 --> 01:34:13,439 I have an important announcement to make. 1154 01:34:14,149 --> 01:34:19,445 After an absence of several years, there will return to the Harmonia Gardens tonight 1155 01:34:19,529 --> 01:34:23,365 the lady who always had the happiest smile, the warmest heart, 1156 01:34:23,450 --> 01:34:26,577 and the largest appetite in the city of New York. 1157 01:34:26,661 --> 01:34:28,078 - It's Dolly. - Dolly? 1158 01:34:28,163 --> 01:34:32,249 - Dolly! - (all) Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! Dolly! 1159 01:34:32,625 --> 01:34:33,959 Attention! 1160 01:34:36,546 --> 01:34:40,841 It is therefore my order, as head waiter of the Harmonia Gardens, 1161 01:34:40,925 --> 01:34:43,010 and your supreme commander, 1162 01:34:43,470 --> 01:34:50,184 that tonight of all nights our usual lightning service will be twice as lightning as ever. 1163 01:34:50,685 --> 01:34:51,935 Or else! 1164 01:35:50,078 --> 01:35:54,873 Waiter, write this down. Mock turtle soup, roast pheasant under glass. 1165 01:35:55,291 --> 01:35:58,502 - Pheasant? - I'll have the same, and some champagne. 1166 01:35:58,878 --> 01:36:00,712 - Champagne? - What would you like, sir? 1167 01:36:01,089 --> 01:36:03,132 Six months off for good behaviour? 1168 01:36:58,646 --> 01:37:01,648 What do you mean, "oysters aren't in season"? 1169 01:37:01,733 --> 01:37:05,736 Anybody can have oysters in season. I want them out of season. 1170 01:37:05,820 --> 01:37:07,446 They don't have any, Miss Simple. 1171 01:37:07,989 --> 01:37:10,282 Then tell 'em to go out and dig for some. 1172 01:37:53,326 --> 01:37:54,535 Oh! 1173 01:40:00,662 --> 01:40:02,329 - Hello again. - Here we are. 1174 01:40:02,413 --> 01:40:05,207 - We thought something happened. - Don't worry. It will. 1175 01:41:04,809 --> 01:41:06,643 (applause) 1176 01:41:09,439 --> 01:41:12,649 Barnaby, Irene, Minnie, 1177 01:41:16,028 --> 01:41:18,196 I feel so good about everything, 1178 01:41:18,656 --> 01:41:20,782 so good about this whole day, 1179 01:41:21,367 --> 01:41:25,579 that I am now going to become an honest man and tell the truth. 1180 01:41:25,663 --> 01:41:26,955 Cornelius? 1181 01:41:27,039 --> 01:41:31,418 I'd forgotten what strange things happen to men when they drink. 1182 01:41:32,795 --> 01:41:37,758 If I tell you the truth, will you let me put my arm around your waist? 1183 01:41:38,509 --> 01:41:42,220 Good heavens! You can do that even if you lie to me. 1184 01:41:55,526 --> 01:41:57,778 I've never touched a woman before. 1185 01:41:57,862 --> 01:42:00,405 You still haven't. That's my corset. 1186 01:42:03,534 --> 01:42:06,703 - You're a wonderful person, Irene. - Thank you, Cornelius. 1187 01:42:07,747 --> 01:42:09,956 And that's why I have to tell you the truth. 1188 01:42:10,500 --> 01:42:12,375 If it'll make you feel better. 1189 01:42:13,377 --> 01:42:16,421 It's all those fancy things that Mrs Levi said about me. 1190 01:42:16,881 --> 01:42:18,381 Oh, yes. 1191 01:42:18,883 --> 01:42:22,219 Well, they're just not so. 1192 01:42:23,012 --> 01:42:24,554 Indeed? 1193 01:42:25,973 --> 01:42:28,892 Irene, I'm not rich. 1194 01:42:29,477 --> 01:42:30,727 Not rich? 1195 01:42:31,270 --> 01:42:34,147 I'm not any of the things Mrs Levi said I was. 1196 01:42:34,232 --> 01:42:37,776 And neither is Barnaby. We're not sports, we don't know anybody. 1197 01:42:37,860 --> 01:42:40,862 We never come to New York. We never do anything 1198 01:42:40,947 --> 01:42:44,115 except work for Mr Vandergelder all day and clean up the store at night. 1199 01:42:45,159 --> 01:42:48,370 And we wanted so much to have one day of adventure, 1200 01:42:49,664 --> 01:42:52,165 that we ran away from Yonkers and told a lot of lies. 1201 01:42:53,584 --> 01:42:55,418 Ah, well, look at us. 1202 01:42:56,254 --> 01:42:58,421 A pair of penniless pretenders. 1203 01:42:58,798 --> 01:43:01,216 But, Cornelius, I've known that all along. 1204 01:43:01,634 --> 01:43:02,676 You have? 1205 01:43:02,760 --> 01:43:05,846 Why else would you have hidden in my cupboard and under my table? 1206 01:43:05,930 --> 01:43:07,848 And made us walk all over New York? 1207 01:43:08,850 --> 01:43:11,643 You're the nicest ladies a man ever went to jail for. 1208 01:43:12,478 --> 01:43:13,728 Jail? 1209 01:43:13,813 --> 01:43:16,189 We don't have the money to pay for this dinner. 1210 01:43:16,274 --> 01:43:22,487 Of course you don't. Minnie, show these two sports what I've got in my purse. 1211 01:43:23,489 --> 01:43:26,616 What a pleasure to know that selling all those silly hats 1212 01:43:27,076 --> 01:43:29,828 can pay for an evening as delightful as this one. 1213 01:43:33,124 --> 01:43:34,875 I can't help myself. 1214 01:43:38,629 --> 01:43:39,921 Wow! 1215 01:43:44,760 --> 01:43:45,886 I... 1216 01:43:47,972 --> 01:43:51,391 No, no, Minnie, my white handbag, not that one. 1217 01:43:53,769 --> 01:43:56,938 - My white handbag. - When we changed for the evening. 1218 01:43:59,483 --> 01:44:00,609 Minnie... 1219 01:44:00,693 --> 01:44:03,361 Only my mad money... a nickel for the horsecar. 1220 01:44:07,617 --> 01:44:09,534 Would you like your check now, sir? 1221 01:44:12,038 --> 01:44:13,580 (nervous laugh) 1222 01:44:18,836 --> 01:44:22,088 Take this away, my good man. Bring us another bottle of champagne. 1223 01:44:31,724 --> 01:44:36,519 - What's this? What are you doing? - It's eight o'clock. I really must be going. 1224 01:44:37,146 --> 01:44:40,315 Going? You haven't finished your dinner yet, Miss Simple. 1225 01:44:40,399 --> 01:44:42,943 That's expensive. If I had food like that every night, 1226 01:44:43,027 --> 01:44:45,862 I'd be out of business inside a year. 1227 01:44:45,947 --> 01:44:50,784 I suggest you have the waiter put it in a bag and take it home to your horses and pigs. 1228 01:44:51,035 --> 01:44:53,954 I don't have pigs, Miss Simple, I have chickens, 1229 01:44:54,038 --> 01:44:56,039 and I did not get them by being extravagant. 1230 01:44:56,540 --> 01:45:00,043 I see no point in this trivial discussion, Mr Vandergelder, 1231 01:45:00,127 --> 01:45:02,462 nor in my remaining here any longer, 1232 01:45:02,546 --> 01:45:08,009 inasmuch as it is quite clear to me that you are, if you forgive the expression, 1233 01:45:08,719 --> 01:45:12,430 - entirely unsuitable. - Unsuitable? 1234 01:45:12,515 --> 01:45:17,686 Nevertheless, I will never say a word to Mrs Levi about this unfortunate evening. 1235 01:45:17,895 --> 01:45:21,898 And I suggest you do likewise when she arrives here. 1236 01:45:21,983 --> 01:45:25,402 Wait a minute. Did you say "arrives here"? 1237 01:45:25,569 --> 01:45:27,529 Yes, she planned to join us at eight. 1238 01:45:27,613 --> 01:45:30,448 You may say I left because I felt sick to my stomach. 1239 01:45:31,200 --> 01:45:32,742 It's quite true, you know. 1240 01:45:33,786 --> 01:45:35,161 Good night. 1241 01:45:40,334 --> 01:45:43,962 Any man who goes to a big city deserves what happens to him. 1242 01:45:54,640 --> 01:45:57,517 - He's all yours, honey. - Good. Mr Cassidy? 1243 01:45:57,601 --> 01:46:00,645 - Yes, Mrs Levi? - It's all right now. You can let me out. 1244 01:46:05,484 --> 01:46:06,985 Whoa. 1245 01:46:08,529 --> 01:46:12,907 - Mr Reisenweber, come here! Hurry! - How often have I told you not to shout? 1246 01:46:12,992 --> 01:46:14,993 - It's her. She's outside. - You mean? 1247 01:46:15,077 --> 01:46:17,078 - What's going on? - Are you sure? 1248 01:46:17,163 --> 01:46:21,458 I know that voice. I heard her. In a beautiful carriage with two horses. 1249 01:46:21,542 --> 01:46:24,252 - That's her. She's come. - Who? Who's come? 1250 01:46:24,336 --> 01:46:26,421 A lady. You wouldn't know her. Mrs Levi. 1251 01:46:29,341 --> 01:46:32,302 - Is it true? - Yes, it's Dolly. Tell the men to get ready. 1252 01:46:32,386 --> 01:46:36,890 - You saw her? - In a long carriage pulled by four horses. 1253 01:46:36,974 --> 01:46:38,850 It's like old times. 1254 01:46:40,519 --> 01:46:43,313 Reisenweber. Rudolph! 1255 01:46:44,023 --> 01:46:45,815 Rudy! 1256 01:46:47,109 --> 01:46:48,401 She is here. 1257 01:47:04,919 --> 01:47:07,045 (orchestra strikes up) 1258 01:47:27,942 --> 01:47:32,529 Hello, Rudy 1259 01:47:33,322 --> 01:47:38,034 Well, hello, Harry 1260 01:47:38,869 --> 01:47:47,836 It's so nice to be back home where I belong 1261 01:47:49,839 --> 01:47:55,718 You are lookin' swell, Manny 1262 01:47:56,846 --> 01:48:01,891 I can tell, Danny 1263 01:48:02,226 --> 01:48:07,397 You're still glowin', you're still crowin' 1264 01:48:07,481 --> 01:48:09,858 You're still 1265 01:48:10,901 --> 01:48:12,777 Mmm. 1266 01:48:12,862 --> 01:48:14,988 Goin' strong 1267 01:48:15,447 --> 01:48:23,788 I feel the room swayin' 1268 01:48:23,873 --> 01:48:28,459 For the band's playin' 1269 01:48:28,544 --> 01:48:36,259 One of my old favourite songs from way back when 1270 01:48:36,802 --> 01:48:39,387 So 1271 01:48:40,264 --> 01:48:43,474 Bridge that gap, fellas 1272 01:48:43,559 --> 01:48:48,313 Find me an empty lap, fellas 1273 01:48:48,397 --> 01:48:57,030 Dolly'll never go away again 1274 01:49:00,743 --> 01:49:04,120 Hello, Dolly 1275 01:49:04,205 --> 01:49:07,790 Well, hello, Dolly 1276 01:49:07,875 --> 01:49:14,464 It's so nice to have you back where you belong 1277 01:49:15,049 --> 01:49:19,219 You're lookin' swell, Dolly 1278 01:49:19,303 --> 01:49:22,847 We can tell, Dolly 1279 01:49:22,932 --> 01:49:26,559 You're still glowin', you're still crowin' 1280 01:49:26,644 --> 01:49:29,938 You're still goin' strong 1281 01:49:30,022 --> 01:49:34,234 We feel the room swayin' 1282 01:49:34,318 --> 01:49:38,071 For the band's playin' 1283 01:49:38,155 --> 01:49:44,619 One of your old favourite songs from way back when 1284 01:49:44,703 --> 01:49:46,412 So 1285 01:49:47,164 --> 01:49:50,416 Here's my hat, fellas 1286 01:49:50,501 --> 01:49:54,212 I'm stayin' where I'm at, fellas 1287 01:49:54,296 --> 01:49:59,342 Promise you'll never go away again 1288 01:50:06,350 --> 01:50:10,687 I went away from the lights of 14th Street 1289 01:50:11,563 --> 01:50:16,484 And into my personal haze 1290 01:50:17,319 --> 01:50:24,033 But now that I'm back in the lights of 14th Street 1291 01:50:24,243 --> 01:50:34,419 Tomorrow will be brighter than the good old days 1292 01:50:34,503 --> 01:50:37,839 Those good old days 1293 01:50:37,923 --> 01:50:39,841 Tell it to me sweet 1294 01:50:41,468 --> 01:50:44,554 Hello! Well, hello, Dolly 1295 01:50:44,638 --> 01:50:47,932 Well, hello! Hey, look! Here's Dolly 1296 01:50:48,017 --> 01:50:52,895 Glad to see you, Hank, let's thank my lucky star 1297 01:50:52,980 --> 01:50:54,564 Your lucky star 1298 01:50:54,648 --> 01:50:59,068 You're lookin' great, Stanley 1299 01:50:59,153 --> 01:51:02,488 Lose some weight? I think, I think you did, Stanley 1300 01:51:02,573 --> 01:51:06,909 Dolly's overjoyed and overwhelmed and... 1301 01:51:07,578 --> 01:51:08,828 Over par 1302 01:51:08,912 --> 01:51:10,580 I hear the ice 1303 01:51:10,664 --> 01:51:12,290 Do you hear the ice tinkle? 1304 01:51:12,374 --> 01:51:14,083 See the lights 1305 01:51:14,168 --> 01:51:16,127 Can you see the light twinkle? 1306 01:51:16,211 --> 01:51:20,840 And you still get glances from us handsome men 1307 01:51:20,924 --> 01:51:24,510 Look at you all, you're all so handsome 1308 01:51:25,054 --> 01:51:27,388 Golly, gee, fellas 1309 01:51:27,473 --> 01:51:31,017 Find me an empty knee, fellas 1310 01:51:31,101 --> 01:51:35,938 Dolly'll never go away again 1311 01:52:38,419 --> 01:52:40,086 Well, hello 1312 01:52:40,170 --> 01:52:41,462 Look who's here. 1313 01:52:41,547 --> 01:52:42,755 Dolly 1314 01:52:42,840 --> 01:52:44,006 This is Louis 1315 01:52:44,091 --> 01:52:45,133 Hello, Louis. 1316 01:52:45,217 --> 01:52:46,300 Dolly 1317 01:52:46,385 --> 01:52:50,763 It's so nice to have you back where you belong 1318 01:52:50,848 --> 01:52:52,682 I am so glad to be back. 1319 01:52:52,766 --> 01:52:54,767 Ah, you're lookin' swell 1320 01:52:54,852 --> 01:52:56,144 Thank you, Louis. 1321 01:52:56,228 --> 01:52:57,311 Dolly 1322 01:52:57,396 --> 01:52:58,438 I can tell 1323 01:52:58,522 --> 01:52:59,564 Does it show? 1324 01:52:59,648 --> 01:53:00,648 Dolly 1325 01:53:00,732 --> 01:53:03,568 You still glowin', you still crowin' 1326 01:53:03,652 --> 01:53:06,988 You still goin' strong 1327 01:53:07,072 --> 01:53:10,032 I feel the room swayin' 1328 01:53:10,909 --> 01:53:13,870 And the band playin' 1329 01:53:14,371 --> 01:53:19,125 One of our old favourite songs from way back when 1330 01:53:19,209 --> 01:53:20,543 I remember it 1331 01:53:20,627 --> 01:53:22,211 - So - It was my favourite 1332 01:53:22,296 --> 01:53:25,256 Show some snap, fellas 1333 01:53:25,549 --> 01:53:28,634 Find her an empty lap, yeah 1334 01:53:28,969 --> 01:53:34,724 Dolly'll never go away again 1335 01:53:35,350 --> 01:53:40,771 Well, well, hello, Dolly 1336 01:53:40,856 --> 01:53:44,358 Well, hello, Dolly 1337 01:53:44,443 --> 01:53:50,573 It's so nice to have you back where you belong 1338 01:53:51,158 --> 01:53:54,827 You're lookin' swell, Dolly 1339 01:53:55,120 --> 01:53:58,289 We can tell, Dolly 1340 01:53:58,499 --> 01:54:01,876 You're still glowin', you're still crowin' 1341 01:54:01,960 --> 01:54:05,379 You're still goin' strong 1342 01:54:05,631 --> 01:54:09,217 I hear the ice 1343 01:54:09,301 --> 01:54:11,511 I hear it tinkle 1344 01:54:11,595 --> 01:54:13,262 See the lights 1345 01:54:13,347 --> 01:54:15,264 I see them twinkle 1346 01:54:15,349 --> 01:54:21,646 And you still get glances from us handsome men 1347 01:54:22,272 --> 01:54:24,106 So 1348 01:54:24,191 --> 01:54:27,610 Mmm, wow, wow, wow, fellas 1349 01:54:28,403 --> 01:54:31,072 Look at the old girl now, fellas 1350 01:54:31,615 --> 01:54:39,038 Dolly'll never go away 1351 01:54:39,373 --> 01:54:46,087 Dolly'll never go away again 1352 01:55:14,950 --> 01:55:16,826 One more time! 1353 01:55:18,370 --> 01:55:25,835 Dolly'll never go away 1354 01:55:26,086 --> 01:55:28,170 Dolly'll never... 1355 01:55:29,256 --> 01:55:31,841 Horace Vandergelder. 1356 01:55:33,552 --> 01:55:37,471 - Do we know each other? - Much too well. 1357 01:55:38,140 --> 01:55:40,600 Oh, it's you, Mrs Levi. 1358 01:55:40,684 --> 01:55:42,059 Yes. 1359 01:55:43,770 --> 01:55:45,521 Well, do you, uh? 1360 01:55:47,149 --> 01:55:49,692 Do you think you have the figure for that sort of get-up? 1361 01:55:50,152 --> 01:55:52,445 That's for others to say, Mr Vandergelder. 1362 01:55:52,529 --> 01:55:55,197 I bought it from a friend, not being a rich lady 1363 01:55:55,282 --> 01:55:58,784 who has nothing better to do than dilly-dally with seamstresses. 1364 01:55:59,244 --> 01:56:06,208 - Which reminds me. Where is Miss Simple? - Miss Simple? Well, she had to... uh... uh... 1365 01:56:06,543 --> 01:56:09,295 She got called away by a sick friend. Had to leave. 1366 01:56:09,671 --> 01:56:14,175 Oh. Well, that's Ernestina. Always thinking of other people. 1367 01:56:14,259 --> 01:56:18,054 We'll just have to make do without her for the time being. Rudolph? 1368 01:56:18,263 --> 01:56:21,390 My dear Mrs Levi, I have saved the very best table for you. 1369 01:56:21,475 --> 01:56:23,643 - How I've missed you. - This way, please. 1370 01:56:23,727 --> 01:56:25,603 - Come along. - I've eaten. 1371 01:56:25,687 --> 01:56:29,398 Don't stand here, you'll get run over by a waiter. Oh, hello. Good evening. 1372 01:56:29,775 --> 01:56:33,319 Oh, hello. How are you? Hi, nice to see you. 1373 01:56:33,403 --> 01:56:35,655 - You know too many people. - Total strangers. 1374 01:56:35,739 --> 01:56:38,866 - So why greet them? - It feels good to have so many friends. 1375 01:56:39,242 --> 01:56:41,452 - Well, say hello for me too. - I already did. 1376 01:56:41,828 --> 01:56:44,747 - Lovely, Rudolph. Perfect. - What are we doing down here? 1377 01:56:44,831 --> 01:56:47,917 There's someone in the dance competition I want you to see. 1378 01:56:48,001 --> 01:56:51,587 - I have no interest in dancing. - Rudy, this is Mr Vandergelder of Yonkers. 1379 01:56:51,672 --> 01:56:54,840 In fact, Yonkers' most influential citizen. 1380 01:56:54,925 --> 01:56:58,844 And Mr Vandergelder insists on buying the finest dinner you have and served promptly. 1381 01:56:58,929 --> 01:57:02,264 - I never said that. - I'm watching my waist. Can't eat a thing. 1382 01:57:02,349 --> 01:57:05,184 - What's ready immediately? - You ordered a chicken... 1383 01:57:05,268 --> 01:57:08,688 I couldn't face a chicken. Not after all I've been through today. 1384 01:57:08,772 --> 01:57:10,898 - Good, cancel the chicken. - And bring a turkey. 1385 01:57:10,982 --> 01:57:13,901 - Yes. - With everything on the side. 1386 01:57:14,861 --> 01:57:16,404 Now, tell me about you and Ernestina. 1387 01:57:16,488 --> 01:57:19,198 I can't wait to hear. It was short, but was it sweet? 1388 01:57:19,282 --> 01:57:22,576 I mean, do you think you and she? I mean, did it go well? 1389 01:57:23,620 --> 01:57:26,789 Mrs Levi, you've a habit of asking very personal questions. 1390 01:57:26,873 --> 01:57:30,543 Mr Vandergelder, if you're thinking of marriage, you might as well learn 1391 01:57:30,627 --> 01:57:33,003 that you have to let women be women. 1392 01:57:33,088 --> 01:57:35,798 Now, tell me, did you like her? Did she like you? 1393 01:57:37,134 --> 01:57:39,552 Always putting your nose into other people's affairs. 1394 01:57:39,636 --> 01:57:41,971 Anybody who lived with you would get as nervous as a cat. 1395 01:57:43,807 --> 01:57:45,975 - What did you say? - Anybody who lived with you... 1396 01:57:46,309 --> 01:57:50,312 Horace Vandergelder, you get that idea right out of your head this minute. 1397 01:57:50,689 --> 01:57:53,899 Why, the idea of you even mentioning such a thing. 1398 01:57:53,984 --> 01:57:56,986 Understand once and for all that I have no intention of marrying you. 1399 01:57:57,654 --> 01:58:00,990 - I didn't mean that. - You've been hinting around for some time. 1400 01:58:01,074 --> 01:58:03,492 - I have not. - So put that right out of your head. 1401 01:58:03,785 --> 01:58:07,872 - Stop saying that. That's not what I meant. - I should hope not. 1402 01:58:07,956 --> 01:58:09,248 You go your way and I'll go mine. 1403 01:58:09,332 --> 01:58:13,961 I am not some Irene Molloy whose head you can turn with chocolate peanuts. Unshelled. 1404 01:58:14,045 --> 01:58:16,881 - The idea of you suggesting it. - You misunderstood me. 1405 01:58:16,965 --> 01:58:20,718 I certainly hope so. Let's not discuss it any more. Here's our food. 1406 01:58:20,802 --> 01:58:23,012 - I don't feel well. - I'll serve Mr Vandergelder. 1407 01:58:23,680 --> 01:58:27,391 Here is a lovely, a lovely wing, for you. 1408 01:58:27,476 --> 01:58:30,936 And some dumplings. Oh, lighter than air, they are. 1409 01:58:31,021 --> 01:58:33,731 - That's what I need, some air. - And some giblets. 1410 01:58:33,815 --> 01:58:36,692 Very, very tender and very good for you. 1411 01:58:36,777 --> 01:58:39,862 No, as I said before, you go your way and I'll go mine. 1412 01:58:39,946 --> 01:58:42,114 Here, have some wine, you'll feel better. 1413 01:58:42,199 --> 01:58:45,034 Since you brought it up, there's one thing I oughta say... 1414 01:58:45,118 --> 01:58:47,703 - I didn't bring it up. - Before we forget about it. 1415 01:58:47,996 --> 01:58:53,292 It's true, I like to manage things, but not anything as disorderly as your household. 1416 01:58:53,376 --> 01:58:57,922 As out of control, as untidy. Oh, no, Horace, you can do that for yourself. 1417 01:58:58,006 --> 01:59:00,800 - It is not out of control. - Let's not say another word. 1418 01:59:00,884 --> 01:59:04,970 - Oh, have some beets. - I'm not hungry and I don't like beets. 1419 01:59:05,055 --> 01:59:09,642 No, a complaining, quarrelsome, friendless soul like you is no sort of companion for me. 1420 01:59:09,726 --> 01:59:13,312 You salt your beets and I'll salt mine. I won't say another word. 1421 01:59:13,605 --> 01:59:15,314 Besides, I'm not those things you said I am. 1422 01:59:15,398 --> 01:59:18,150 You're the only person that knows it. 1423 01:59:18,401 --> 01:59:21,445 No, Horace, I have decided to enjoy life. 1424 01:59:21,530 --> 01:59:25,324 You can find a housekeeper who'll cook for a dollar a day. 1425 01:59:25,408 --> 01:59:28,536 It can be done, if you like cold baked beans. I can see you now, 1426 01:59:28,620 --> 01:59:31,580 ending your days listening at keyholes for fear of being cheated. 1427 01:59:31,915 --> 01:59:36,210 - Have some more beets. They're delicious. - I hate beets. 1428 01:59:36,294 --> 01:59:38,212 There, that's the difference between us. 1429 01:59:38,588 --> 01:59:41,173 I'd be nagging you, to get some spirit into you, 1430 01:59:41,258 --> 01:59:45,094 and the pity of it is you could be a charming, amiable man if you wanted to. 1431 01:59:45,470 --> 01:59:50,933 - I don't want to be charming. - But you are. You can't help yourself. 1432 01:59:51,810 --> 01:59:54,937 Listening at keyholes! You have no right to say such things. 1433 01:59:55,272 --> 01:59:57,022 At your age you ought to enjoy the truth. 1434 01:59:57,107 --> 01:59:59,942 My age, you're always talking about my age. 1435 02:00:00,402 --> 02:00:04,530 I don't know what your age is, but with bad temper you'll double it in six months. 1436 02:00:04,614 --> 02:00:09,451 Now siddown. Before we change the subject, there's one thing I'll say. 1437 02:00:09,786 --> 02:00:14,456 I don't wanna hear it. You're wasting your time. I have no intention of proposing. 1438 02:00:14,708 --> 02:00:19,169 Oh! I suppose you want me to ask you? Well, I'm sorry. I'm turning you down. 1439 02:00:19,254 --> 02:00:22,131 How can you turn me down when I haven't asked ya anything? 1440 02:00:22,215 --> 02:00:25,634 It's no use arguing. I've made up your mind. Here, let me cut your wings. 1441 02:00:26,136 --> 02:00:29,763 - I don't want my wings cut. - No man does, Horace. No man does. 1442 02:00:29,973 --> 02:00:32,474 - I've got a headache. I'm leaving. - (fanfare) 1443 02:00:32,809 --> 02:00:35,352 Oh, no, the dance competition is about to begin. 1444 02:00:35,437 --> 02:00:39,481 Ladies and gentlemen, if I may have your attention please. 1445 02:00:40,066 --> 02:00:44,987 It is my pleasure to announce on behalf of the management of the Harmonia Gardens, 1446 02:00:45,071 --> 02:00:48,407 that our dance contest is about to commence. 1447 02:00:49,034 --> 02:00:53,996 The judges for tonight's competition are Mr Hermann Fleishacker, 1448 02:00:56,917 --> 02:00:58,584 Mr Llewellyn Codd, 1449 02:01:00,337 --> 02:01:05,507 and our special guest-of-honour judge, Mrs Dolly Levi. 1450 02:01:15,060 --> 02:01:16,393 Siddown! 1451 02:01:21,691 --> 02:01:24,443 Ladies and gentlemen who wish to participate, 1452 02:01:24,527 --> 02:01:28,572 will you please come to the dance floor. To the lucky winning couple 1453 02:01:28,657 --> 02:01:34,203 goes the grand prize of 50 silver dollars or an engagement at the Harmonia Gardens. 1454 02:01:34,663 --> 02:01:35,746 50. 1455 02:01:36,039 --> 02:01:38,207 Everybody, dance! 1456 02:01:44,464 --> 02:01:47,883 - Your check, sir. - Another bottle of champagne. 1457 02:02:15,578 --> 02:02:21,792 Mm! Look at him. What grace, what talent, what a living he could earn with his feet! 1458 02:02:22,585 --> 02:02:24,336 - Horace, look. - Where? 1459 02:02:29,843 --> 02:02:32,261 - Wait a minute. - Oh, isn't he wonderful? 1460 02:02:32,679 --> 02:02:35,347 That's Ambrose Kemper, so-called artist. 1461 02:02:35,640 --> 02:02:39,351 - Why, so it is. - No wonder his pictures are so awful. 1462 02:02:39,853 --> 02:02:43,147 - He must paint with his feet. - He's sure to win first prize. 1463 02:02:43,231 --> 02:02:46,025 Ermengarde should see him now, dancing with another girl. 1464 02:02:46,776 --> 02:02:50,654 - And such a pretty little thing too. - It's shameful, that's what it is. Shameful. 1465 02:03:02,125 --> 02:03:05,210 Look, there's that Molloy woman dancing with a man. 1466 02:03:06,629 --> 02:03:08,047 I think it's a man. 1467 02:03:10,133 --> 02:03:13,594 And only a few hours ago she was waiting for me to propose. 1468 02:03:13,887 --> 02:03:16,722 - Shocking. - No faithfulness left in this world. 1469 02:03:16,806 --> 02:03:20,559 I agree. I certainly do. And it's very selfish that people like us 1470 02:03:20,643 --> 02:03:24,438 don't jump right up and marry someone just to set the world a good example. 1471 02:03:30,403 --> 02:03:31,737 My hat! 1472 02:03:47,045 --> 02:03:48,420 Ermengarde! 1473 02:03:50,090 --> 02:03:52,341 - Uncle... - My niece! 1474 02:03:52,550 --> 02:03:53,842 Agh! 1475 02:03:56,304 --> 02:03:59,389 You are a disgrace to Yonkers! 1476 02:04:01,851 --> 02:04:03,477 Grrrr! 1477 02:04:10,151 --> 02:04:14,071 - Mr Vandergelder, the contest! - I'll show you a contest! 1478 02:04:17,408 --> 02:04:19,034 Call the police! 1479 02:04:24,165 --> 02:04:26,125 Uncle Horace, we can explain. 1480 02:04:26,292 --> 02:04:28,377 Exp? I'll give you... 1481 02:04:50,775 --> 02:04:52,025 Cornelius Hackl! 1482 02:04:52,110 --> 02:04:55,362 - What are you doing in New York? - Delivering some oats. 1483 02:04:55,446 --> 02:04:57,614 Oats? With my former intended? 1484 02:04:57,699 --> 02:05:00,200 - You're discharged! - You can't fire me. I quit. 1485 02:05:00,285 --> 02:05:01,577 So do I. 1486 02:05:01,661 --> 02:05:04,580 - And you're discharged! - You can't fire me. I quit. 1487 02:05:04,664 --> 02:05:05,914 (Minnie) So do I. 1488 02:05:17,260 --> 02:05:18,468 I'm sorry. 1489 02:05:27,729 --> 02:05:28,979 Grrr! 1490 02:05:31,691 --> 02:05:32,900 Oh! 1491 02:05:39,616 --> 02:05:44,453 Horace Vandergelder, flat on your back you are still charming. 1492 02:05:46,456 --> 02:05:49,333 Cornelius, Barnaby, 1493 02:05:50,960 --> 02:05:55,505 perhaps there's a way I can get Mr Vandergelder to give you back your jobs. 1494 02:05:56,090 --> 02:05:58,258 What? How? 1495 02:05:59,636 --> 02:06:02,346 I could become his wife. 1496 02:06:05,516 --> 02:06:07,476 - No, that's impossible. - It is? 1497 02:06:08,144 --> 02:06:10,145 - Yes. - But why, Cornelius? 1498 02:06:11,314 --> 02:06:14,316 - Because. That's why. - But you have to give me a reason. 1499 02:06:14,400 --> 02:06:18,320 Never mind the reason. Never mind the reason! And don't tell me to shush! 1500 02:06:18,655 --> 02:06:21,490 - What's going on there? - Cornelius, quick! 1501 02:06:22,033 --> 02:06:26,411 Hey, you! What's all this noise? What's happening here? 1502 02:06:26,829 --> 02:06:29,581 - Now, you stay out of this. - Are you all right, Miss? 1503 02:06:29,666 --> 02:06:31,875 - I'll let you know. - Young man... 1504 02:06:31,960 --> 02:06:34,086 I'm only trying to tell her something. 1505 02:06:34,170 --> 02:06:37,589 Well, it's too late and you're disturbing the peace. 1506 02:06:37,674 --> 02:06:41,468 No, it's not too late. That's why I'm shouting. 1507 02:06:41,844 --> 02:06:45,889 For 28 years, my whole life, I never did anything. 1508 02:06:46,015 --> 02:06:49,768 I just worked, took orders, never went anywhere. Stayed in Yonkers. 1509 02:06:50,019 --> 02:06:52,354 - Yonkers? - And today 1510 02:06:52,438 --> 02:06:57,693 the most important thing that can happen to a man, and might never have happened, 1511 02:06:57,777 --> 02:07:02,614 happened to me because I left Yonkers and came to New York and met this lady. 1512 02:07:03,199 --> 02:07:04,866 Met her this afternoon. 1513 02:07:05,827 --> 02:07:09,413 Mister... just what are you talking about? 1514 02:07:09,789 --> 02:07:14,876 Officer, I'm talking about none other than love. 1515 02:07:15,461 --> 02:07:17,212 - (both) Love? - Love? 1516 02:07:17,672 --> 02:07:22,301 Young man, are you trying to tell me that after 28 years in Yonkers 1517 02:07:22,385 --> 02:07:24,970 you've fallen in love with this young lady in one day? 1518 02:07:25,054 --> 02:07:29,641 Oh, no, Officer, I didn't fall in love with Miss Irene Molloy of this city in just a day. 1519 02:07:29,726 --> 02:07:32,477 It was much quicker than that. An hour. 1520 02:07:32,562 --> 02:07:35,564 No, even that's too long. What's less than a minute? 1521 02:07:35,648 --> 02:07:37,065 - A second? - Less than that. 1522 02:07:37,150 --> 02:07:39,401 - A moment. - That's it. 1523 02:07:39,777 --> 02:07:44,531 That is it. Now, all of you, listen to me. 1524 02:07:46,617 --> 02:07:48,035 Please. 1525 02:07:50,079 --> 02:07:57,210 It only takes a moment 1526 02:07:57,712 --> 02:08:05,761 For your eyes to meet, and then 1527 02:08:06,512 --> 02:08:10,015 Your heart knows 1528 02:08:10,558 --> 02:08:14,227 In a moment 1529 02:08:14,771 --> 02:08:25,864 You will never be alone again 1530 02:08:26,783 --> 02:08:30,827 I held her 1531 02:08:31,537 --> 02:08:34,790 For an instant 1532 02:08:35,875 --> 02:08:45,008 But my arms felt sure and strong 1533 02:08:45,927 --> 02:08:55,977 It only takes a moment 1534 02:08:56,813 --> 02:09:00,273 To be loved 1535 02:09:01,150 --> 02:09:09,324 A whole life long 1536 02:09:11,744 --> 02:09:14,704 Isn't the world full of wonderful things? 1537 02:09:16,249 --> 02:09:17,749 I have lost so many things. 1538 02:09:17,834 --> 02:09:21,336 My job, my future, everything that people think is important, 1539 02:09:21,421 --> 02:09:26,133 but I don't care. Cos, even if I have to dig ditches for the rest of my life, 1540 02:09:26,676 --> 02:09:31,138 I shall be a ditch-digger who once had a wonderful day. 1541 02:09:31,681 --> 02:09:35,475 Mister, do you mind? I came in late. Right after... 1542 02:09:35,560 --> 02:09:37,936 It only... 1543 02:09:38,020 --> 02:09:41,398 Takes a moment 1544 02:09:42,191 --> 02:09:50,031 But his arms felt sure and strong 1545 02:09:51,033 --> 02:10:00,208 It only takes a moment 1546 02:10:02,879 --> 02:10:11,636 He held me, for an instant 1547 02:10:12,221 --> 02:10:21,438 But his arms felt safe and strong 1548 02:10:22,982 --> 02:10:31,406 It only takes a moment 1549 02:10:32,408 --> 02:10:43,376 To be loved a whole life long 1550 02:10:44,670 --> 02:10:48,882 And that is all 1551 02:10:49,842 --> 02:10:54,554 That love's about 1552 02:10:55,097 --> 02:10:59,893 And we'll recall 1553 02:11:00,436 --> 02:11:06,691 When time runs out 1554 02:11:08,361 --> 02:11:14,282 That it only 1555 02:11:15,326 --> 02:11:21,081 Took a moment 1556 02:11:22,291 --> 02:11:36,972 To be loved a whole life long 1557 02:11:42,186 --> 02:11:44,604 Tell Rudolph not to worry about the damage. 1558 02:11:44,689 --> 02:11:48,650 Just send the bill to Vandergelder's Hay and Feed Store, Yonkers, New York. 1559 02:11:51,320 --> 02:11:54,197 - There's your life for you. - I don't want to hear about it. 1560 02:11:54,282 --> 02:11:56,908 Without niece, without bride, without clerks. 1561 02:11:56,993 --> 02:11:58,910 Look, I'm tired. I've got a backache. 1562 02:11:59,579 --> 02:12:02,747 - That's all you have. I hope you're satisfied. - Never mind. 1563 02:12:03,791 --> 02:12:07,711 There's only one thing for me to say. I've been meaning to say it all night. 1564 02:12:07,795 --> 02:12:11,214 If it's to ask me to marry you, Dolly Levi, never - not in a million years. 1565 02:12:12,216 --> 02:12:16,177 It wasn't that at all, Horace. All I wanted to say was... 1566 02:12:16,554 --> 02:12:18,054 Goodbye 1567 02:12:18,139 --> 02:12:19,180 What? 1568 02:12:19,265 --> 02:12:20,265 Goodbye 1569 02:12:20,349 --> 02:12:21,433 What are you talking about? 1570 02:12:21,517 --> 02:12:27,606 Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye 1571 02:12:28,024 --> 02:12:30,775 Goodbye, goodbye 1572 02:12:30,860 --> 02:12:35,030 - Nonsense. - Don't try to stop me, Horace, please. 1573 02:12:35,281 --> 02:12:38,283 Wave your little hand and whisper "So long, dearie" 1574 02:12:38,367 --> 02:12:41,036 You ain't gonna see me any more 1575 02:12:41,370 --> 02:12:44,623 And when you discover that your life is dreary 1576 02:12:44,707 --> 02:12:47,208 Don't you come a-knockin' at my door 1577 02:12:47,293 --> 02:12:50,337 Cos I'll be all dolled up and singin' that song 1578 02:12:50,421 --> 02:12:53,506 That says "You dog, I told you so" 1579 02:12:54,050 --> 02:12:56,926 So wave your little hand and whisper "So long, dearie" 1580 02:12:57,011 --> 02:13:00,305 Dearie should have said "So long" so long ago 1581 02:13:02,058 --> 02:13:05,101 Because you treated me so rotten and rough 1582 02:13:05,186 --> 02:13:08,563 I have had enough of feeling low 1583 02:13:08,898 --> 02:13:11,816 So wave your little hand and whisper "So long, dearie" 1584 02:13:11,901 --> 02:13:15,195 Dearie should have said "So long" so long ago 1585 02:13:16,906 --> 02:13:23,203 For I can hear that choo-choo calling me on to a fancy new address 1586 02:13:23,287 --> 02:13:29,626 Yes, I can hear that choo-choo calling me on, on board that Happiness Express 1587 02:13:29,710 --> 02:13:33,338 I'm gonna learn to dance and drink and smoke a cigarette 1588 02:13:33,422 --> 02:13:41,096 I'm going as far away from Yonkers as a girl can get 1589 02:13:42,223 --> 02:13:44,182 So 1590 02:13:48,354 --> 02:13:51,773 And on those cold winter nights, Horace, 1591 02:13:56,195 --> 02:13:59,614 you can snuggle up to your cash register. 1592 02:14:03,869 --> 02:14:06,579 It's a little lumpy, but it rings. 1593 02:14:08,457 --> 02:14:12,377 Don't come a-knockin', I'll be all dolled up and singin' that song 1594 02:14:12,461 --> 02:14:16,047 That says "You dog, I told you so" 1595 02:14:16,132 --> 02:14:19,426 So, Horace, you will find your life a sad old story 1596 02:14:19,510 --> 02:14:22,554 You'll be living in that lonesome territory 1597 02:14:22,763 --> 02:14:25,515 When you see old Dolly shuffle off to glory 1598 02:14:25,599 --> 02:14:28,476 Oh, I should have said "So long" 1599 02:14:28,811 --> 02:14:31,896 How could I have been wrong? 1600 02:14:31,981 --> 02:14:36,735 Oh, I should have said "So long" 1601 02:14:40,156 --> 02:14:48,747 So long ago 1602 02:15:01,927 --> 02:15:03,845 (playful shouting) 1603 02:15:04,513 --> 02:15:09,267 Quiet! Quiet, down there, you little monsters. 1604 02:15:09,351 --> 02:15:11,144 Cornelius! Barnaby! 1605 02:15:13,355 --> 02:15:15,190 D'ya hear me down there? 1606 02:15:15,608 --> 02:15:17,275 Ermengarde! 1607 02:15:18,027 --> 02:15:19,486 What the devil is this? 1608 02:15:20,321 --> 02:15:22,447 What's this chicken mash doing all over? 1609 02:15:29,872 --> 02:15:31,623 Cornelius! Barnaby! 1610 02:15:32,124 --> 02:15:34,959 Get up here this minute and clean up this mess. 1611 02:15:42,384 --> 02:15:46,221 Well, good riddance. Didn't need you before and I don't need you now. 1612 02:15:47,306 --> 02:15:50,642 Ermengarde! I'm ready for my breakfast! 1613 02:15:51,393 --> 02:15:56,564 I want three eggs with crisp bacon, and hot porridge with cream, and grits... 1614 02:16:04,031 --> 02:16:05,698 It's not fair. 1615 02:16:08,410 --> 02:16:11,120 It's worse than that. It's lonely. 1616 02:16:17,711 --> 02:16:23,091 Not in a million years, Dolly Levi. 1617 02:16:23,801 --> 02:16:27,178 You go your way and I'll go mine. 1618 02:16:33,102 --> 02:16:36,729 - Good morning, Uncle Horace. - Good morning, Mr Vandergelder. 1619 02:16:38,399 --> 02:16:40,650 Oh, come crawling back, have you? 1620 02:16:40,734 --> 02:16:43,945 I've a good mind not to take you, but as I'm so softhearted 1621 02:16:44,029 --> 02:16:46,656 go get your aprons and start cleaning up this mess. 1622 02:16:47,199 --> 02:16:49,659 We're not coming back to work for you. 1623 02:16:49,743 --> 02:16:50,869 What? 1624 02:16:51,620 --> 02:16:54,038 Barnaby and I are stopping by for our money. 1625 02:16:54,123 --> 02:16:56,207 You see, we've decided to go into business. 1626 02:16:56,292 --> 02:16:57,709 Business? 1627 02:16:57,835 --> 02:17:01,963 And since the only business we know is hay and feed, we're opening our own store. 1628 02:17:02,047 --> 02:17:04,549 Mrs Levi's found the perfect location for us. 1629 02:17:04,633 --> 02:17:07,677 - Right across the street from you. - She wouldn't dare. 1630 02:17:08,137 --> 02:17:09,971 Hackl and Tucker Incorporated. 1631 02:17:10,723 --> 02:17:12,974 Huh! You'll last for a week. 1632 02:17:13,809 --> 02:17:15,935 - What about my breakfast? - Uncle Horace, 1633 02:17:19,023 --> 02:17:21,566 I think you'd better start learning how to make it yourself. 1634 02:17:24,987 --> 02:17:27,614 All right, all right. My conscience is clear. 1635 02:17:27,698 --> 02:17:31,034 A man can do only so much to keep fools from their own natural folly. 1636 02:17:31,118 --> 02:17:36,456 Why, Horace Vandergelder, as I live and breathe, how well you look today. 1637 02:17:37,082 --> 02:17:40,335 I just came by to return your cane, so don't let me interrupt. 1638 02:17:40,419 --> 02:17:43,046 You were doing something? What were you doing? 1639 02:17:43,380 --> 02:17:45,423 We were getting their money. 1640 02:17:45,507 --> 02:17:48,092 $146.35. 1641 02:17:48,177 --> 02:17:51,179 - Plus $6. 12 of mine. - And the money my mama left me. 1642 02:17:51,639 --> 02:17:55,016 That's right. $52.48. 1643 02:17:55,225 --> 02:17:59,228 - 38, idiot. - 48... Uncle. 1644 02:17:59,980 --> 02:18:02,190 (all discussing what's owed) 1645 02:18:03,817 --> 02:18:06,778 All right, all right. If all you can think about 1646 02:18:06,862 --> 02:18:09,238 at a time like this is money, the safe is upstairs. 1647 02:18:13,911 --> 02:18:16,037 And I have the combination. 1648 02:18:16,622 --> 02:18:19,874 - You stay here. - If you insist, Horace. 1649 02:18:37,935 --> 02:18:42,021 Ephraim Levi, I'm gonna get married again. 1650 02:18:43,232 --> 02:18:46,275 I'm gonna marry Horace Vandergelder. 1651 02:18:48,362 --> 02:18:50,029 And I'm asking your permission. 1652 02:18:51,281 --> 02:18:54,367 It won't be a marriage in the sense that we had one, 1653 02:18:54,451 --> 02:18:56,911 but I shall certainly make him happy. 1654 02:18:56,996 --> 02:18:58,705 You can be sure of that. 1655 02:18:59,415 --> 02:19:05,962 I am going to marry Horace Vandergelder and send his money out into the world, 1656 02:19:06,046 --> 02:19:08,256 doing all the things you taught me. 1657 02:19:09,091 --> 02:19:11,009 As you always used to say, Ephraim: 1658 02:19:11,093 --> 02:19:15,471 "Money, pardon the expression, is like manure." 1659 02:19:15,806 --> 02:19:21,519 "It's not worth a thing unless it's spread around, encouraging young things to grow." 1660 02:19:22,312 --> 02:19:27,608 Anyhow, that's the opinion of the future Mrs Vandergelder. 1661 02:19:28,444 --> 02:19:34,449 And, Ephraim, I'm still waiting for that sign that you approve. 1662 02:19:35,868 --> 02:19:37,493 (steps) 1663 02:19:40,914 --> 02:19:43,416 - Mr Vandergelder. - Outside. Front and back. 1664 02:19:51,300 --> 02:19:54,761 Bossy, scheming, meddling, 1665 02:19:55,387 --> 02:19:58,806 irritating, inquisitive, exasperating. 1666 02:20:00,184 --> 02:20:04,145 Horace, I know you're no longer interested, 1667 02:20:04,938 --> 02:20:08,816 but I have found you the ideal wife. 1668 02:20:08,901 --> 02:20:11,986 Dolly Levi, I don't want you to find me any ideal wife. 1669 02:20:12,071 --> 02:20:14,280 If I want an ideal wife, I'll find one of my own, 1670 02:20:14,364 --> 02:20:16,616 and I have found her and it's you, damn it! 1671 02:20:19,328 --> 02:20:25,083 I know I've been a fool and I probably always will be, but Dolly, forgive me and marry me. 1672 02:20:30,255 --> 02:20:31,547 No, Horace, I... 1673 02:20:32,549 --> 02:20:34,967 - I don't dare. I don't dare. - What do you mean? 1674 02:20:35,552 --> 02:20:41,015 Well, you know as well as I do that you're the first citizen of Yonkers 1675 02:20:41,850 --> 02:20:44,602 and your wife would have to be a... a somebody. 1676 02:20:44,686 --> 02:20:47,188 You are! You are a wonderful woman. 1677 02:20:47,523 --> 02:20:50,483 Yes, but, uh, do you really think I have it in me... 1678 02:20:50,567 --> 02:20:53,861 to forgo fancy clothes and expensive jewels, 1679 02:20:53,946 --> 02:20:56,864 and instead be a benefactress to half the town? 1680 02:20:59,868 --> 02:21:02,703 In other words, to be a credit to you? 1681 02:21:04,998 --> 02:21:08,334 Dolly, everybody knows that you could do anything you wanted to do. 1682 02:21:11,046 --> 02:21:14,674 By the way, Horace, here's the money I borrowed from you yesterday. 1683 02:21:15,551 --> 02:21:16,884 Keep it, keep it. 1684 02:21:20,097 --> 02:21:21,472 Oh, Horace. 1685 02:21:23,892 --> 02:21:26,686 I never thought I'd ever hear you say anything like that. 1686 02:21:29,356 --> 02:21:32,316 You know it's bad business to let 'em open a store over there? 1687 02:21:32,693 --> 02:21:34,986 - It was your idea. - Let him be your partner. 1688 02:21:35,237 --> 02:21:37,822 And Barnaby can have Cornelius's old job. 1689 02:21:37,906 --> 02:21:40,658 That way we can all dance at Ermengarde's wedding. 1690 02:21:40,742 --> 02:21:46,372 That does it. You've gone too far. I'll dance at no wedding. Besides, I don't know how. 1691 02:21:46,456 --> 02:21:49,625 - All right, I'll dance. - Excuse me, Mr Vandergelder. 1692 02:21:49,710 --> 02:21:53,921 - I said outside! Now get moving. - Horace, what is going on around here? 1693 02:21:54,006 --> 02:21:58,259 Oh, nothing, I just thought I'd have the shutters done over in forest green. 1694 02:21:59,219 --> 02:22:02,013 - Forest-green shutters? - The paint's still good, 1695 02:22:02,097 --> 02:22:05,183 but that fellow's just set up a business and needs a good start. 1696 02:22:05,767 --> 02:22:10,521 You see, Dolly, I've always felt that money, pardon the expression, is like manure. 1697 02:22:11,023 --> 02:22:16,736 It's not worth a thing unless it's spread around, encouraging young things to grow. 1698 02:22:18,071 --> 02:22:19,572 Thank you, Ephraim. 1699 02:22:20,866 --> 02:22:24,118 Hello, Dolly 1700 02:22:24,203 --> 02:22:28,122 Well, hello, Dolly 1701 02:22:28,582 --> 02:22:35,504 It's so nice to have you here where you belong 1702 02:22:38,300 --> 02:22:42,678 I never knew, Dolly 1703 02:22:43,096 --> 02:22:47,183 Without you, Dolly 1704 02:22:47,267 --> 02:22:55,983 Life was awfully flat and, more than that, was awfully wrong 1705 02:23:14,962 --> 02:23:18,965 Here's my hat, Horace 1706 02:23:19,049 --> 02:23:23,636 I'm stayin' where I'm at, Horace 1707 02:23:23,720 --> 02:23:29,558 Dolly'll never go away 1708 02:23:29,643 --> 02:23:31,352 Wonderful woman. 1709 02:23:31,812 --> 02:23:36,065 Again 1710 02:23:40,445 --> 02:23:44,657 Put on your Sunday clothes when you feel down and out 1711 02:23:45,117 --> 02:23:48,536 Strut down the street and have your picture took 1712 02:23:50,038 --> 02:23:54,375 Dressed like a dream your spirits seem to turn about 1713 02:23:54,584 --> 02:23:57,003 That Sunday shine is a certain sign 1714 02:23:57,087 --> 02:23:59,797 That you feel as fine as you look 1715 02:24:00,465 --> 02:24:04,093 Take the someone whose arms you're in 1716 02:24:04,720 --> 02:24:08,097 Hold on to her tight and spin 1717 02:24:08,181 --> 02:24:12,643 And one, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three, look! 1718 02:24:13,478 --> 02:24:17,982 I held her 1719 02:24:18,066 --> 02:24:21,527 For an instant 1720 02:24:21,611 --> 02:24:28,868 But my arms felt sure and strong 1721 02:24:29,411 --> 02:24:35,291 It only takes a moment 1722 02:24:36,126 --> 02:24:42,923 To be loved a whole life long 1723 02:24:43,884 --> 02:24:46,427 Yes, it takes a woman 1724 02:24:46,511 --> 02:24:48,220 A dainty woman 1725 02:24:48,472 --> 02:24:51,098 A sweetheart, a mistress, a wife 1726 02:24:52,059 --> 02:24:54,477 Oh, yes, it takes a woman 1727 02:24:54,561 --> 02:24:56,479 A fragile woman 1728 02:24:56,563 --> 02:24:59,440 To bring you the sweet things in life 1729 02:24:59,900 --> 02:25:06,697 Well, well, hello, Dolly 1730 02:25:06,782 --> 02:25:10,117 Well, hello, Dolly 1731 02:25:10,202 --> 02:25:15,790 It's so nice to have you back where you belong 1732 02:25:16,792 --> 02:25:20,669 You're lookin' swell, Dolly 1733 02:25:20,754 --> 02:25:24,090 We can tell, Dolly 1734 02:25:24,174 --> 02:25:27,551 You're still glowin', you're still crowin' 1735 02:25:27,636 --> 02:25:31,138 You're still goin' strong 1736 02:25:31,598 --> 02:25:38,979 Just see the crowd swayin' 1737 02:25:39,064 --> 02:25:43,484 While the band's playin' 1738 02:25:43,568 --> 02:25:50,991 One of your old favourite songs from way back when 1739 02:25:51,493 --> 02:25:53,661 So 1740 02:25:54,287 --> 02:25:57,998 Wow, wow, wow, fellas 1741 02:25:59,126 --> 02:26:02,169 Look at the old girl now, fellas 1742 02:26:02,546 --> 02:26:17,643 Dolly'll never go away 1743 02:26:19,354 --> 02:26:26,444 Again