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INSTRUMENTAL:
We Wish You A Merry Christmas

2
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 How are you? You look nice.
Happy Christmas, love.

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 You look gorgeous
in your Christmas jumper.

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00:00:18,229 --> 00:00:19,837
 Gwaaar! Go on to fuck!

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For subtitling services, contatct:
waqas.zahoor89@gmail.com

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 I love your Christmas hat,
it's gorgeous.

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CLAMOURING

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 No, no!

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CLAMOURING

10
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<font color="
you fucking prick?!

11
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Watch his fucking back, will you?

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Happy fucking Christmas.

13
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Repeat the sound of joy

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Repeat the sound of joy

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00:00:45,361 --> 00:00:48,226



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00:00:48,227 --> 00:00:49,360


17
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That was a load of bollocks!

18
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Christmas is a time for giving,
but when you've got fuck all,

19
00:01:03,227 --> 00:01:05,227
it's also a time for taking.

20
00:01:08,752 --> 00:01:11,752
Take it easy, you're getting pine
needles all over the new carpet!

21
00:01:11,754 --> 00:01:15,753
Would you stop going on about
their new carpet?

22
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But it's cream.

23
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I'm taking off these plastic bags.

24
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Not until we're outside.

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HE GRUNTS

26
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TREE PLAYS CHRISTMAS CAROL

27
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 You had one job.

28
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It's the perfect time for me
and Jock to be doing house calls,

29
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because there's a film being shot
in the city and the whole of Cork

30
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is off trying to get selfies with
your man Robert Sheehan.

31
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 I'm going through a crowd of fans
at the moment.

32
00:01:49,155 --> 00:01:50,753
 Yeah, they're really annoying.

33
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SCREAMING

34
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<font color="
You ready?

35
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CHEERING

36
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SCREAMING

37
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SHE SOBS

38
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Do you think you were the right
actor to play this character,

39
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seeing as you are not gay?

40
00:02:06,195 --> 00:02:07,478
Oh, well, I am gay.

41
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I'm gay for women,
I think about women

42
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in the same gay way
that gay men think about... gays.

43
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And you'll never guess
who's been hired for security.

44
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 Stand back! Billy Murphy.

45
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The film producers figured
if he was working on set,

46
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at least he wouldn't be breaking in.

47
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 I will fucking punch you. Get back!

48
00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:27,281
All in all, it doesn't seem
very Christmassy this year.

49
00:02:27,282 --> 00:02:29,479
Might be something to do with
our housing estate

50
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being more like Armageddon.

51
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It's been non-stop with protesters,

52
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and half of them are only there
to get on the telly.

53
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<font color="
the residents of what's been dubbed

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the Real Capital of Cork -
or Real COC for short -

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barricaded themselves
in their council estate,

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creating their very own hard border.

57
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The guards are struggling
to keep control.

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Only residents and food deliveries
are allowed past the barricades.

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<font color="
duck and chicken balls?

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That's me, that's me!

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I paid by card.

62
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Building repairs, me fucking hole!

63
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The authorities offered the same
upgrade to the housing estate over,

64
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but once they got everyone out,

65
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they demolished the lot of it.

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<font color="
These houses are perfectly fine.

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KNOCK ON WINDOW

68
00:03:11,148 --> 00:03:13,479
Mam, the weird smell's there again!

69
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Is the canary still alive? Yeah.

70
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,479
Then stop worrying about it.
Jesus.

71
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Just cos some langer
in City Hall thinks our houses

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Aren't good enough
for his safety standards.</font>

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CROWD AGREES

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 Like, what would them firemen
be doing if they weren't

75
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 putting out our fires anyway?
Ever think about that?

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CROWD AGREES

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SHE COUGHS

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  You OK? I'm fucking fine.

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SHE COUGHS

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EXCLAMATIONS OF DISGUST

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 Do you have a hanky, no?

82
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Mam has a hard-on for
everything Christmassy,

83
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but she's always been too broke
to get a real Christmas tree.

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It's lovely.

85
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What the fuck?

87
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88
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Why three Christmas trees?

89
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They say you can't get oil
past the barricade.

90
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We're going to line them up
like the Christmas tree...

91
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Christmas trees.

92
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Ah! Fucking hell!

93
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Ha-Ha! Ha-Ha!

94
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<font color="

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Burning Christmas trees
is like burning Christmas.

96
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Did you get to the doctor?

97
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What's he going to tell me
that I don't already know?

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Stuff about medicine.

99
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Fuck that.

100
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FLINT STRIKES REPEATEDLY

101
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Fucking thing. Give me that fag.

102
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Are you sure you should be smoking?

103
00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:43,479
<font color="
That's true, actually.

104
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Sure, when you walk around,

105
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you always see people smoking
and coughing.

106
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SHE COUGHS

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SHE COUGHS

108
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Mam!

109
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Are you OK, Mam? Mam!

110
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Everybody, get out the fucking way!
NOW!

111
00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,015
CLAMOUR

112
00:05:11,282 --> 00:05:14,479
Only one of you can travel with her
now, lads.

113
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I never understood what
an ambulance chaser was until now.

114
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SIREN

115
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SHE COUGHS

116
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 It says here she's doing phenomenal.

117
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 It says "pneumonia".

118
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SHE COUGHS
Is she going to be OK?

119
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 It's not looking good.

120
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 The pneumonia has done
severe damage to her lungs,

121
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 and the smoking hasn't helped.

122
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We can't just stand round here
and watch my mam getting more sick.

123
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 The most important thing
is to help lift her spirits.</font>

124
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:06,480
 Being in hospital over Christmas
is going to be really tough.

125
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 I'll pick us up
something to eat, yeah?

126
00:06:09,148 --> 00:06:10,282
 Happy meal?

127
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SOMBRE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC:
We Wish You A Merry Christmas

128
00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:26,148
Mam, you need something
to lift your spirits.

129
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What would you like?

130
00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:30,480
 Yeah, we...

131
00:06:31,881 --> 00:06:33,480
 ..we'll get you whatever you want.

132
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SHE MUMBLES

133
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:45,480
Sorry, I didn't quite get that one.

134
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:49,480
 I've never seen a white Christmas.

135
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,480
 Hey.

136
00:06:55,480 --> 00:07:00,480
Are you sure there's nothing else
that might lift your spirits?

137
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:03,479
 Like... A bike.

138
00:07:03,480 --> 00:07:04,480
Aye.

139
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:07,480
 We could get you a bike. Yeah.

140
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,282
Just whisper the make and model.

141
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,480
No.

142
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:26,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.SubtitleDB.org today

143
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 Ho-ho-ho, Merry Christmas!

144
00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:51,881
I fucking hate Christmas.

145
00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:56,479
Who's all that crap for, anyway?

146
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:59,414
 Conor and Jock.
I bought presents for them?

147
00:07:59,415 --> 00:08:02,479
 We'll need to drop it off to their
house on the way home. Not a hope.

148
00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:04,281
Their estate's like a war zone.

149
00:08:04,282 --> 00:08:05,479
 OK, we'll walk.

150
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:07,614
Enda, did you bring your rape alarm?
 Yep.

151
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Fine.

152
00:08:11,748 --> 00:08:13,479
Don't worry about it.

153
00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:16,479
I'll do everything I'm told,
because it's not about me,

154
00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:19,014
it's about my money for Christmas
on people I don't even like.

155
00:08:19,015 --> 00:08:20,479
That's what this is about.

156
00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:23,479
I'll get you close. You can
fuck the presents over the wall!

157
00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:25,480
 Barry, stop being a prick.

158
00:08:25,481 --> 00:08:26,747
What?

159
00:08:26,748 --> 00:08:28,479
You can't even get in.

160
00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:29,480
 I know a way.

161
00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,480
 You're going to break
the fucking thing, Barry.

162
00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:42,613
When you've got one dead parent,
and another nearly dead parent

163
00:08:42,614 --> 00:08:45,479
in the hospital, the last thing
you need is optimism.

164
00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:47,481
 There's actually lots of
successful orphans in the world.

165
00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:51,479
 Like Batman.

166
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,281
I'm not an orphan.

167
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:54,480
 Well, what are you
getting angry at me for?

168
00:08:54,481 --> 00:08:56,480
 I'm just trying to comfort you.

169
00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:02,148
 Superman. Stop it.

170
00:09:03,748 --> 00:09:05,480
 Harry Potter. Quit it.

171
00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,479
 God.

172
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:14,480
<font color="

173
00:09:15,480 --> 00:09:16,480
And very successful.

174
00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,881
Hey! We could try praying
to Him first, no?

175
00:09:31,282 --> 00:09:34,479
The Lord God
works in mysterious ways.

176
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:37,480
Lads, get a load of
this fucking prick.

177
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,479
ON IPAD: Why did you choose
to film in Cork city?

178
00:09:43,480 --> 00:09:46,147
Well, we needed a lot of
weird-looking background people,

179
00:09:46,148 --> 00:09:48,480
and Cork has a lot to offer
in this area.

180
00:09:50,748 --> 00:09:53,480
Could you point that thing
in a different direction, please?

181
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:10,479
 Here. We'll give you
the phone unlocking code

182
00:10:10,480 --> 00:10:13,480
 after you tow the snow machine
to the hospital.

183
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,479
 And how are you going to
get it out of there?

184
00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:19,479
 That church is like Fort Knox
since they started filming there.

185
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,479
We know this place better than
we know our own dicks.

186
00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,479
<font color="

187
00:10:25,480 --> 00:10:28,480
And this time, we know
a guy on the inside.

188
00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:34,479
Explain it to me again.

189
00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:36,479
It's a coin-toss competition.

190
00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:37,613
Best of five.

191
00:10:37,614 --> 00:10:41,479
If we win, you let us in
and turn a blind eye.

192
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:43,613
What do I get if I win?

193
00:10:43,614 --> 00:10:45,880
The knowledge that you won.

194
00:10:45,881 --> 00:10:48,479
What more could you want
than the winning feeling

195
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:50,479
of a coin-toss competition?

196
00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:52,480
You'd be king of the tossers.

197
00:10:53,881 --> 00:10:55,479
 Are you fucking serious?

198
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:58,479
 King of the fucking tossers.

199
00:10:58,480 --> 00:10:59,480
 Fuck off.

200
00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:02,614
 You can punch us.

201
00:11:03,748 --> 00:11:05,479
What the fuck?

202
00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:06,747
 Do you want to help your mam or not?

203
00:11:06,748 --> 00:11:09,479
 Well, obviously, but I bruise
like a fucking peach. Yeah,

204
00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:12,015
<font color="
a kick out of is inflicting pain.

205
00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:15,480
Fuck's sake.

206
00:11:16,881 --> 00:11:19,747
For every coin toss that you win,

207
00:11:19,748 --> 00:11:22,479
you get to punch one of us.

208
00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:23,480
Both of you.

209
00:11:23,481 --> 00:11:26,479
That's the deal. Fine.

210
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:28,147
Has anyone got a coin?

211
00:11:28,148 --> 00:11:29,479
I've a chocolate one.

212
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,480
Do you mind if it's British?

213
00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:37,147
Heads.

214
00:11:37,148 --> 00:11:38,880
Thank fuck!

215
00:11:38,881 --> 00:11:40,014
<font color="

216
00:11:40,015 --> 00:11:41,480
HE LAUGHS

217
00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:49,479
Tails.

218
00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:52,480
HE LAUGHS

219
00:11:53,481 --> 00:11:56,480
Arm. Leg.

220
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,479
It's vitally important now
that you don't move,

221
00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:03,479
because I don't want to
hit you in the face.

222
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,015
OK?

223
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:12,148
Ooh! Ow!

224
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,479
That kind of stung.

225
00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:17,613
Ooh!

226
00:12:17,614 --> 00:12:19,015
<font color="

227
00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:23,747
I once tried to give up gambling,
but I found it really difficult,

228
00:12:23,748 --> 00:12:27,479
because even when
you're not gambling... Argh!

229
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:28,480
..you're still KIND of gambling,

230
00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:30,479
doing things that
don't feel like gambling.

231
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,613
Do you know what I mean?
Not really.

232
00:12:32,614 --> 00:12:35,281
Like, I once battered this fella,

233
00:12:35,282 --> 00:12:38,480
<font color="
of months to Cork Prison.

234
00:12:40,415 --> 00:12:41,747
But had I not stabbed him,

235
00:12:41,748 --> 00:12:45,479
I could be a fucking dentist now
or something.

236
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:46,480
I won again!
HE LAUGHS

237
00:12:47,748 --> 00:12:49,480
It's my lucky day.

238
00:12:50,614 --> 00:12:53,014
Oh!

239
00:12:53,015 --> 00:12:54,480
Stomachs.

240
00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:59,147
BOTH: Ooh!

241
00:12:59,148 --> 00:13:00,282
THEY COUGH

242
00:13:01,282 --> 00:13:02,747
HE LAUGHS

243
00:13:02,748 --> 00:13:04,479
Whoo!

244
00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:07,479
<font color="
be three out of three.

245
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:09,479
Just flip the fucking thing, yeah?

246
00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:11,479
All right. Relax.

247
00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:12,614
Jesus!

248
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:20,479
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

249
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:21,480
Whoa, whoa!

250
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:26,480
I win.

251
00:13:28,415 --> 00:13:29,480
Fuck!

252
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:37,480
We need two people to replace those
actors who got pissed over lunch.

253
00:13:39,881 --> 00:13:43,480
<font color="
got acting experience?

254
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:48,481
Just get me two of
the weirdest-looking fellas here.

255
00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:54,479
Will they do? They're perfect.

256
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:56,479
EXTRAS GROAN

257
00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,480
Right, you two, come with me.

258
00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,480
BACKGROUND CHATTER

259
00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:07,480
What the fuck? Fuck you!

260
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:10,479
FUCK!

261
00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:12,480
GENERAL MOANING

262
00:14:12,481 --> 00:14:14,480
<font color="

263
00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:22,479
The IFTAs will be BEGGING me
to take an award after this.

264
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:23,881
Begging me on their hands and knees.

265
00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:34,479
Excuse me, Mr Sheehan.

266
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:36,880
Don't talk to me.

267
00:14:36,881 --> 00:14:39,480
I think he's acting.
HE INHALES

268
00:14:39,481 --> 00:14:43,479
Are you acting? Shush, please.

269
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:44,880
Thank you.

270
00:14:44,881 --> 00:14:47,147
<font color="

271
00:14:47,148 --> 00:14:49,479
I took two sources of inspiration
for this scene.

272
00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:52,479
The original movie, Alien -
"Argh, argh!" -

273
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:57,479
and this old Maltese lady
who was having an asthma attack.

274
00:14:57,480 --> 00:15:00,479
And she was making
the most fascinating sounds.

275
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,479
Strange, like...
HE GASPS

276
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:06,479
That's where it comes...
That's where the noise...

277
00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,480
<font color="

278
00:15:07,481 --> 00:15:09,880
Ah, you can hear the Maltese
in that.

279
00:15:09,881 --> 00:15:11,479
Yeah - thank you.

280
00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,479
So good. Yeah, so good. Maltese.

281
00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:17,747
You can hear it, like, yeah,
it's Maltese. Yeah, yeah.

282
00:15:17,748 --> 00:15:21,479
That's more just
someone doing a lisp.

283
00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:22,480
Yeah.

284
00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:26,747
Any tips?

285
00:15:26,748 --> 00:15:28,479
Tips?

286
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,479
Acting tips. It's our first time.

287
00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:33,479
<font color="
it's your first time?

288
00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:34,747
OK, let's start it up, please!

289
00:15:34,748 --> 00:15:39,479
Ah, ah, ah! Listen, whatever you do,
do not look into the camera.

290
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:43,281
OK? Great. You'll be great.
You'll be great. OK, great.

291
00:15:43,282 --> 00:15:45,479
All set. 342, take one.

292
00:15:45,480 --> 00:15:47,479
Argh!

293
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,479
And track.

294
00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:51,479
HE GASPS

295
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:52,480
<font color="

296
00:15:52,481 --> 00:15:55,479
Argh!
GUNSHOT AND GASPING

297
00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:59,613
I fear this fight may be at its end.

298
00:15:59,614 --> 00:16:04,479
Those soldiers may slash my flesh,

299
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:08,479
but God is my only judge.

300
00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:09,480
HE GASPS

301
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:14,480
Promise me one thing.

302
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:18,147
You have our word.

303
00:16:18,148 --> 00:16:20,479
You're looking straight
into the camera.

304
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,613
Can we reset, please?

305
00:16:22,614 --> 00:16:24,747
<font color="

306
00:16:24,748 --> 00:16:26,479
Don't look at the camera.

307
00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:27,480
And what did you do?

308
00:16:29,015 --> 00:16:30,479
I looked at the camera.

309
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:32,479
Yeah.

310
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:33,480
Sorry, Mr Sheehan.

311
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:42,480
Those soldiers
may slash my flesh but God -

312
00:16:42,481 --> 00:16:45,480
God is my only judge.

313
00:16:47,148 --> 00:16:49,880
You've missed your mark.
You have our word.

314
00:16:49,881 --> 00:16:51,479
You've missed your mark.

315
00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,479
<font color="

316
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,479
It's really, really simple.

317
00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,414
Don't look at the camera,
stay on your mark,

318
00:16:57,415 --> 00:16:59,479
concentrate, yeah?

319
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:01,479
I really want to get it
on this next one, lads, OK.

320
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:04,479
Go for it, boy. I've got a good
feeling about this one, yeah?

321
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:05,480
Yeah, yeah.

322
00:17:09,282 --> 00:17:11,479
You have our word.

323
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:14,479
<font color="
off his fucking hand.

324
00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:16,479
Promise me one thing.

325
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:17,480
HE BELCHES

326
00:17:17,481 --> 00:17:18,881
Cut.

327
00:17:23,415 --> 00:17:27,480
Those soldiers may have
slashed my flesh, but...

328
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,479
Cut to FUCK!

329
00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:32,480
Argh!

330
00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:44,014
Argh!

331
00:17:44,015 --> 00:17:45,480
Argh...

332
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:49,747
God is my only judge!

333
00:17:49,748 --> 00:17:51,479
HE GASPS

334
00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:52,480
CONOR STIFLES A LAUGH

335
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,479
 God is my only judge!

336
00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:58,480
HE GASPS

337
00:17:58,481 --> 00:18:00,015
STIFLED LAUGHTER

338
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:04,281
 Sorry, boy, sorry, boy. We've got
this, we've got this. Right.

339
00:18:04,282 --> 00:18:07,414
 Use a prop - use it.

340
00:18:07,415 --> 00:18:10,480
 God is my only judge.

341
00:18:10,481 --> 00:18:12,479
HE GASPS

342
00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:14,479
LAUGHTER

343
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,748
STIFLED LAUGHTER

344
00:18:19,481 --> 00:18:22,479
 I'm never going to get this out.

345
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:23,480
HE GROANS

346
00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:25,480
CONOR AND JOCK LAUGH

347
00:18:25,481 --> 00:18:30,414
Can we please just get a bit
of professionalism around here?

348
00:18:30,415 --> 00:18:31,479
 Aww...!

349
00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:32,480
 Take 57.

350
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:37,479
I heard Robert Pacino say once
that great performances

351
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:38,881
come out of pain and suffering.

352
00:18:40,015 --> 00:18:43,014
I'd like to think we had something
to do with helping Mr Sheehan

353
00:18:43,015 --> 00:18:44,479
get to that place.

354
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:46,480
 Promise me one thing.

355
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,015
You have our word.

356
00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:52,480
 Find my mother.

357
00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:55,480
 Tell her...

358
00:18:58,614 --> 00:19:03,014
<font color="

359
00:19:03,015 --> 00:19:05,481
for leaving her in her time of need.

360
00:19:13,415 --> 00:19:14,480
HE GROANS

361
00:19:15,881 --> 00:19:17,479
And cut.

362
00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:20,480
Ohhh! Thank fuck for that!

363
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,480
Get out of my way, you two amateurs.

364
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:27,480
Argh!

365
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:36,479
Hey, hey. We're coming.
We're coming.

366
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:38,480
Just back it up to the gate.

367
00:19:45,480 --> 00:19:46,480
HE GROANS

368
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:54,480
HE GROANS

369
00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:58,415
<font color="

370
00:19:59,881 --> 00:20:01,479
Heads or tails?

371
00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:02,480
Heads.

372
00:20:02,481 --> 00:20:03,747
HE GROANS

373
00:20:03,748 --> 00:20:05,415
Fuck this!

374
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:09,480
Over here.

375
00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:16,480
I'm sorry about this, lads,
but I take my job very seriously.

376
00:20:17,614 --> 00:20:19,480
THEY GROAN

377
00:20:21,415 --> 00:20:23,480
THEY COUGH

378
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:28,479
What would you be doing
with a snow machine, anyway?

379
00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:30,479
You can't sell snow.

380
00:20:30,480 --> 00:20:32,480
<font color="

381
00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:36,415
It's just my mam's not well.

382
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:40,480
And the doctor's saying
she might not make it.

383
00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:46,414
You see, she's always wanted
to see a white Christmas.

384
00:20:46,415 --> 00:20:48,480
We were just trying
to do something for her.

385
00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:52,480
You know what?

386
00:20:52,481 --> 00:20:56,480
I was really sick
in hospital once.

387
00:20:58,415 --> 00:21:01,479
The only thing I wanted
was for someone to sit with me

388
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,480
so I wouldn't be alone.

389
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:06,614
<font color="

390
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:11,480
Who's sitting with your mum
right now?

391
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:15,480
No-one.

392
00:21:18,415 --> 00:21:19,479
Lads, get the fuck out of here

393
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:22,480
before I kick the living shit
out of you again.

394
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:26,480
Thanks, Billy. Thanks, Billy.

395
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:31,014
And tell your mam
I was asking for her.

396
00:21:31,015 --> 00:21:32,480
Yeah.

397
00:21:47,148 --> 00:21:48,480
We tried our best, Mam, but...

398
00:21:52,748 --> 00:21:55,147
<font color="

399
00:21:55,148 --> 00:21:57,479
Don't worry about it.

400
00:21:57,480 --> 00:21:59,479
The traffic is very bad.

401
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,479
Yeah.

402
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:05,479
I'll see you when I see you,
all right?

403
00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:06,480
Merry Christmas, son.

404
00:22:06,481 --> 00:22:09,415
Merry Christmas, boy.

405
00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:13,147
I think for every time one of us
has a nice Christmas,

406
00:22:13,148 --> 00:22:16,414
someone else out there
is having a shit one.

407
00:22:16,415 --> 00:22:17,479
<font color="

408
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,479
Hey, just thought
we'd come over and say hi.

409
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,479
I'm Conor, this is Jack.
Conor.

410
00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:24,479
Hello, Jack. I'm Francie.
Thanks for calling over.

411
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,479
Pleased to meet you, boy.
I like your eyebrows, kid.

412
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,479
Oh, yeah? Have you got a razor?
I could do yours for you.

413
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:32,479
Go away. You're joking me.

414
00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:34,479
THEY LAUGH

415
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,480
<font color="
with one of them?

416
00:22:36,481 --> 00:22:38,281
KNOCK AT DOOR

417
00:22:38,282 --> 00:22:39,479
A hospital is the one place

418
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:41,479
where a stranger will never
tell you to fuck off.

419
00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:42,480
Ssh, ssh!

420
00:22:43,881 --> 00:22:46,147
Good morning, doctor.
SHE LAUGHS

421
00:22:46,148 --> 00:22:47,479
They'll all be happy to see you.

422
00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:49,480
THEY LAUGH

423
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:55,479
You can even go up and hug
someone you never met before

424
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,479
and they'll be grateful for it.

425
00:22:57,480 --> 00:22:59,480
HE SOBS

426
00:22:59,481 --> 00:23:01,479
Bang. Boom.

427
00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:05,479
An old handshake or even
a pat on the back in person

428
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:08,479
will mean more than getting
some shitty gift in the post.

429
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,479
 Stay still. Am I plucked?

430
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:14,414
THEY CHEER

431
00:23:14,415 --> 00:23:18,479
And doing something that might only
take a minute out of your day

432
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:21,480
could last a lifetime
in the memory of someone else.

433
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,479
 ALL: Santa is a fanny!

434
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:30,281
Get away from me.
 You need to get back into bed.

435
00:23:30,282 --> 00:23:31,614
<font color="

436
00:23:32,481 --> 00:23:35,479
Whoa! Whoa!

437
00:23:35,480 --> 00:23:36,480
Get back.

438
00:23:36,481 --> 00:23:38,479
I'll fucking do it.

439
00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:41,479
Oh! Aww, Jesus!

440
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:44,479
Sorry. What's going on?
I want to go home.

441
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,281
She needs full-time
medical supervision.

442
00:23:47,282 --> 00:23:48,415
Argh!

443
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:51,479
<font color="

444
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:52,480
Let's be civilised.

445
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:59,747
Look, you might know about sickness,
you might know about medicine -

446
00:23:59,748 --> 00:24:04,147
but I know my mam, and she wants
to be home for Christmas,

447
00:24:04,148 --> 00:24:06,148
and that's where she needs to be.

448
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,480
I don't even know who owns this.

449
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:22,480
HUB

450
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:26,480
Right, come on, then.

451
00:24:28,015 --> 00:24:29,880
What's she doing out of hospital?

452
00:24:29,881 --> 00:24:32,480
Nice to fucking see you, too.
<font color="

453
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:38,479
Can we get some help here, please,
lads?   Sick mammy coming through!

454
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:41,147
Mothers spend their whole lives
looking after other people,

455
00:24:41,148 --> 00:24:43,479
so when one of them gets sick,
everyone knows it's time

456
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:45,480
to put their differences aside.

457
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:56,480
Could you stop here
for a second, please?

458
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:00,613
One second.

459
00:25:00,614 --> 00:25:04,479
INDISTINCT CHATTER

460
00:25:04,480 --> 00:25:07,479
<font color="
the other side of that barricade?

461
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,479
Not a bother, boy.

462
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,479
Are you still there?

463
00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:14,479
Yeah. I think I just figured out
our publicity campaign.

464
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:15,748
Driver, chop-chop.

465
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:20,479
It's been two hours.

466
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:23,479
We're never getting out of
this war zone of a housing estate.

467
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,479
I told you not to come this way.

468
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,148
 Concentrate. Stop.
Brake, brake, brake!

469
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:41,147
 Oh, that's great. He'll gallop off
now and tell everyone we're here.

470
00:25:41,148 --> 00:25:43,479
In our neighbourhood,
the riot police usually only turn up

471
00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:45,479
at good birthday parties.

472
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,479
SHOUTING

473
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:50,147
 'Reinforcements are being
sent in to help the Gardai

474
00:25:50,148 --> 00:25:51,479
 'dismantle the barricades.'

475
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,479
<font color="

476
00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:56,479
We're all people of Cork here.

477
00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:58,479
You can take our land,

478
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:03,479
but you'll never take our FREEDOM!

479
00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:04,480
Come on!

480
00:26:04,481 --> 00:26:06,479
Aw - for fuck's sake!

481
00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:07,747
'The actor Robert Sheehan

482
00:26:07,748 --> 00:26:11,479
'has come to show his support for
the Real Capital of Cork,

483
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:14,613
'and it appears he has watched
Braveheart one too many times.'

484
00:26:14,614 --> 00:26:18,480
CHEERING

485
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:31,281
 Long live the Real fucking Capital
of Cork!

486
00:26:31,282 --> 00:26:33,747
 I'm not fucking going anywhere.
This is my fucking home.

487
00:26:33,748 --> 00:26:37,479
 Fuck off, you fucking liar.
Get your fucking hands off me!

488
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,281
 Fucking hell!
Get your fucking hands off me!

489
00:26:40,282 --> 00:26:43,479
 Get your fucking hands
off my sister. She's dyslexic!

490
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:47,281
 Right, which house is theirs?
And let's get the fuck out of here!</font>

491
00:26:47,282 --> 00:26:48,480
 It's that one there.

492
00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:52,480
 Jesus Christ!

493
00:26:54,148 --> 00:26:56,479
 Right, whoever did that,
you own up straightway

494
00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:58,281
 or I'm calling the Gardai.

495
00:26:58,282 --> 00:27:00,479
Mentioning the Gardai
is one idiotic thing to do

496
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:03,147
with this shit going on
around the corner.

497
00:27:03,148 --> 00:27:05,480
HUBBUB

498
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:10,479
 OK. Which one of you was it?

499
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:12,479
<font color="

500
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,748
Get back in the fucking car, Bobby.

501
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:29,748
There's only one tree left.

502
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,881
How about we burn
the kitchen chairs instead?

503
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:48,881
MARIEAD COUGHS

504
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:52,479
COUGHING CONTINUES

505
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:54,282
Keep calm.

506
00:27:57,480 --> 00:27:58,480
I am friends with a guard.

507
00:27:58,481 --> 00:28:00,479
Dad, don't fucking say that!

508
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:02,479
SCREAMING

509
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:03,480
SHOUTING

510
00:28:03,481 --> 00:28:05,613
<font color="

511
00:28:05,614 --> 00:28:07,479
SHOUTING

512
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:10,414
Oh no, no! No, no, no!

513
00:28:10,415 --> 00:28:12,015
Fuck! Dad, do something!

514
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:15,480
He's not rain, Barry!

515
00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:21,480
COUGHING

516
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,479
GASPING

517
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:30,014
She's having a seizure.

518
00:28:30,015 --> 00:28:32,747
Quick, just get something
for her mouth. To eat?

519
00:28:32,748 --> 00:28:34,613
No, like a wooden spoon
or something.

520
00:28:34,614 --> 00:28:37,480
That won't help - you just need to
wait for it to pass.</font>

521
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:39,480
 It's OK, it's OK, it's OK.

522
00:28:41,415 --> 00:28:42,880
SHOUTING

523
00:28:42,881 --> 00:28:44,479
 Go home, everybody, go home.

524
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:45,480
This is our home.

525
00:28:45,481 --> 00:28:47,479
 You, you fucking prick!

526
00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:50,479
SHOUTING

527
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,479
GASPING
Mam, can you hear me? Come on!

528
00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:54,480
Mam.

529
00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,480
Mam, come on, fuck that,
come on, please.

530
00:28:58,480 --> 00:29:01,282
 SHOUTING
Everybody go home!

531
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:06,479
 This is our home!

532
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:09,747
Mam? Wake up, Mam. Come on, please!

533
00:29:09,748 --> 00:29:11,479
SHOUTING

534
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:14,014
<font color="
We're going to be all right.

535
00:29:14,015 --> 00:29:15,748
Mam, wake the fuck up, will you?

536
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:20,613
I think you only realise
how important hope is

537
00:29:20,614 --> 00:29:22,480
when it's taken away.

538
00:29:26,614 --> 00:29:28,479
HUB

539
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,480
Without hope, a community can be
torn to shit.

540
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:36,479
But if you gives someone hope...

541
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:38,479
..even just the tiniest bit...

542
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:40,480
GASPS

543
00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:44,480
COUGHS AND RETCHES

544
00:29:48,015 --> 00:29:50,480
I'm just doing my job!

545
00:29:51,881 --> 00:29:53,614
Stop it! Stop it!

546
00:29:58,415 --> 00:30:00,282
Mam. What you looking at?

547
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,479
HUB

548
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,481
CROWD QUIETENS

549
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:19,014
COUGHS

550
00:30:19,015 --> 00:30:22,148
<font color="
give her some space. You're OK.

551
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:25,480
Get away. It's OK, it's OK.

552
00:30:25,481 --> 00:30:27,481
I'll give you space.

553
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:34,479
Girls, get back inside!

554
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:35,481
Orla!

555
00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:49,480
It's snowing!

556
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:02,481
TINKLING MUSIC PLAYS

557
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:13,480
INSTRUMENTAL:
We Wish You A Merry Christmas

558
00:31:34,015 --> 00:31:35,614
Happy Christmas, everyone.

559
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:50,480
<font color="

560
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,480
Thank you. You're welcome.

561
00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:01,479
Maybe Christmas
IS a time for giving.

562
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:03,480
Even when you've got fuck all.

563
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:08,480
Bah, humbug.

563
00:32:09,305 --> 00:32:15,676
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