1 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:09,470 All right now. 2 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,280 Oh, "What to expect in your eighth month. 3 00:00:12,316 --> 00:00:15,276 Indigestion, heartburn, bloating, 4 00:00:15,316 --> 00:00:19,156 flatulence, nasal congestion." 5 00:00:19,500 --> 00:00:23,150 Oh, well, according to this, my entire family is pregnant. 6 00:00:23,183 --> 00:00:26,333 You know, the worst part about your pregnancy is going to be the mood swings. 7 00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:28,300 -Oh. -I can get very testy. 8 00:00:28,333 --> 00:00:30,123 [doorbell rings] 9 00:00:30,150 --> 00:00:32,330 Oh, I'll get it. I'll get it, sweetie. It's okay. 10 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:34,266 Oh, look who this is. 11 00:00:34,300 --> 00:00:37,270 Aunt Freida. What a surprise. 12 00:00:37,300 --> 00:00:39,330 -Hi, Aunt Freida. What are you doing here? -Hi. 13 00:00:39,366 --> 00:00:41,366 [kissing] 14 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:44,400 -I came by to drop off your wedding present. -Oh. 15 00:00:44,433 --> 00:00:47,223 Since I was not invited to your nuptials. 16 00:00:47,250 --> 00:00:49,100 Or ensuing festivities. 17 00:00:49,133 --> 00:00:52,473 Oh, Freida, we sent you an invitation. 18 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:56,500 That said, "You are invited to attend 19 00:00:56,830 --> 00:00:59,000 but forbidden to sing, Freida." 20 00:00:59,330 --> 00:01:02,120 Well, Ma did want to personalize the invitations. 21 00:01:03,233 --> 00:01:05,133 I knew it was all her doing. 22 00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:06,216 She's jealous. 23 00:01:06,250 --> 00:01:08,170 She's jealous of my singing talent 24 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:11,000 and of my successful business investments. 25 00:01:11,330 --> 00:01:12,370 What business investments, Freida? 26 00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:16,100 You married a billionaire who dropped dead two days later. 27 00:01:16,133 --> 00:01:19,173 All right, so a little luck was involved. 28 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,660 The point is that Sylvia has hurt me deeply. 29 00:01:22,100 --> 00:01:23,170 Aw. 30 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,220 But I'm not gonna take this out on you. 31 00:01:26,133 --> 00:01:27,373 [sobbing] Oh, Frannie! 32 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:31,330 You! This SOB bought our apartment building 33 00:01:31,660 --> 00:01:33,000 and threw your father and me out. 34 00:01:33,330 --> 00:01:35,280 However, your mother is going to pay! 35 00:01:35,316 --> 00:01:38,166 You are horrible, Freida. 36 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:41,270 We are never gonna have you up to our house again. 37 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:43,380 What house? 38 00:01:47,150 --> 00:01:49,300 Your father and I are practically homeless. 39 00:01:49,333 --> 00:01:51,203 We have to sell everything. 40 00:01:51,233 --> 00:01:54,133 Do you know anyone who wants to buy a 40-year-old couch 41 00:01:54,166 --> 00:01:57,416 which, thanks to plastic slipcovers, is like brand-new. 42 00:01:59,166 --> 00:02:01,266 Oh, Ma, Ma. 43 00:02:01,300 --> 00:02:03,100 You're not gonna be homeless. 44 00:02:03,133 --> 00:02:05,303 Me and Max will take care of everything. 45 00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:06,423 We figured that. 46 00:02:07,416 --> 00:02:09,166 Morty! 47 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,000 Where do you want me to put this? 48 00:02:11,330 --> 00:02:13,160 Upstairs, near the bay window. 49 00:02:18,183 --> 00:02:19,483 ♪ She was working In a bridal shop ♪ 50 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:21,180 ♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪ 51 00:02:21,216 --> 00:02:22,346 ♪ Till her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪ 52 00:02:22,383 --> 00:02:24,123 ♪ In one of those Crushing scenes ♪ 53 00:02:24,150 --> 00:02:25,480 ♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪ 54 00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:29,170 ♪ She was out on her fanny ♪ 55 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:30,400 ♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪ 56 00:02:30,433 --> 00:02:32,123 ♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪ 57 00:02:32,150 --> 00:02:34,180 ♪ She was there to sell make-up But the father saw more ♪ 58 00:02:34,216 --> 00:02:36,266 ♪ She had style! She had flair! She was there ♪ 59 00:02:36,300 --> 00:02:37,380 ♪ That's how she became ♪ 60 00:02:37,416 --> 00:02:40,156 ♪ The Nanny ♪ 61 00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:43,830 ♪ Who would have guessed That the girl we described ♪ 62 00:02:43,116 --> 00:02:45,226 ♪ Was just exactly What the doctor prescribed? ♪ 63 00:02:45,266 --> 00:02:46,396 ♪ Now, the father Finds her beguiling ♪ 64 00:02:46,433 --> 00:02:48,503 ♪ Watch out C.C. ♪ 65 00:02:48,830 --> 00:02:49,250 ♪ And the kids Are actually smiling ♪ 66 00:02:49,283 --> 00:02:50,353 ♪ Such joie de vivre ♪ 67 00:02:50,383 --> 00:02:52,503 ♪ She's the lady in red ♪ 68 00:02:52,830 --> 00:02:56,200 ♪ When everybody else Is wearing tan ♪ 69 00:02:56,233 --> 00:02:58,183 ♪ The flashy girl From Flushing ♪ 70 00:02:58,216 --> 00:02:59,316 ♪ The Nanny named Fran! ♪ 71 00:03:09,383 --> 00:03:13,123 Oh, Niles, how am I ever going to tell Maxwell... 72 00:03:13,150 --> 00:03:15,500 ...that my parents are staying here? 73 00:03:15,830 --> 00:03:18,370 Quickly and without the negligee. 74 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:20,130 Maybe I shouldn't tell him at all. 75 00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:22,126 How long do you think it'll be before he notices? 76 00:03:22,166 --> 00:03:24,146 Well, not long. He'll see her here for breakfast, 77 00:03:24,183 --> 00:03:26,163 he'll see her here for lunch, he'll see her here for dinner. 78 00:03:26,500 --> 00:03:28,130 So I'm figuring I got at least six months. 79 00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:29,266 [scoffs] 80 00:03:32,466 --> 00:03:36,216 Oh, darling, don't you look beautiful. 81 00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:39,150 Mmm, and that perfume. 82 00:03:39,183 --> 00:03:41,333 Oh, I haven't smelled that perfume 83 00:03:41,366 --> 00:03:44,156 since the last time you did something wrong. 84 00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:45,130 What did you do? 85 00:03:46,830 --> 00:03:48,660 Nothing. 86 00:03:48,100 --> 00:03:53,500 Can't a wife just put something on sexy to entice her husband... 87 00:03:54,466 --> 00:03:56,176 [mumbling] ...when her parents are moving in? 88 00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:01,200 -What, darling? -I said, can't a wife 89 00:04:01,233 --> 00:04:06,283 just say over and over again how much she loves her husband... 90 00:04:06,316 --> 00:04:09,126 [mumbling] ...when her parents are moving in? 91 00:04:09,166 --> 00:04:11,166 What do you keep mumbling into my neck? 92 00:04:11,200 --> 00:04:13,470 [sighs] Okay, all right, I'll tell you. 93 00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:15,170 But while I'm telling you, 94 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:17,420 would you please, just focus on the negligee. 95 00:04:20,283 --> 00:04:23,433 Freida bought Mom and Dad's building and threw them out of their apartment. 96 00:04:25,466 --> 00:04:28,996 Oh, darling, that's terrible. Oh, I wish I had known. 97 00:04:29,330 --> 00:04:30,470 Well, we have to help them. What are they gonna do? 98 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:34,350 Oh, don't worry. They already found a new beautiful place to stay. 99 00:04:35,416 --> 00:04:37,296 Well, that's good. Nearby? 100 00:04:37,333 --> 00:04:38,473 Walking distance. 101 00:04:40,330 --> 00:04:43,120 Do you use all your closets in here? 102 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:46,380 No. 103 00:04:47,300 --> 00:04:48,430 Focus on the negligee. 104 00:04:55,133 --> 00:04:56,433 Well, I have to call the agency. 105 00:04:56,466 --> 00:05:00,146 None of these models they submitted are right for our poster. 106 00:05:00,183 --> 00:05:01,373 You know, sir, 107 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:04,350 if you need an attractive, photogenic man on camera, 108 00:05:04,383 --> 00:05:06,353 -I can pass for-- -Hume Cronyn? 109 00:05:06,383 --> 00:05:09,173 [laughs] 110 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:11,830 [clears throat] Niles, thank you for your offer 111 00:05:11,116 --> 00:05:14,326 but this poster really has to sell our new show. 112 00:05:14,660 --> 00:05:17,430 We need someone virile, someone who exudes masculinity. 113 00:05:17,466 --> 00:05:19,216 Oh, well, then there's your man. 114 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:24,120 -Hi, Daddy. -Hi, sweetheart. 115 00:05:24,150 --> 00:05:26,420 Have you found your virile, masculine model yet? 116 00:05:26,450 --> 00:05:29,100 Not yet, no. We shoot tomorrow. 117 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:32,163 Oh. Well, maybe Michael will know someone. 118 00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:33,230 Honey? 119 00:05:36,233 --> 00:05:37,483 How you doing? What's up? 120 00:05:38,160 --> 00:05:39,280 Margaret. 121 00:05:39,316 --> 00:05:41,276 Maxwell, let me handle this. 122 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:43,373 You're hired. 123 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,270 The job pays $5000. 124 00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:46,300 Sorry, Hume. 125 00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:52,380 Well, I don't care. 126 00:05:52,416 --> 00:05:55,446 All those models live hand-to-mouth. 127 00:05:55,483 --> 00:05:58,283 At least I have skills to fall back on. 128 00:06:05,166 --> 00:06:06,426 Morning, Ma. 129 00:06:06,466 --> 00:06:08,346 Good morning, darling. 130 00:06:08,383 --> 00:06:12,483 Oh, I'm so happy that you're going to be here all the time. 131 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:15,660 I forgot what it's like living with my mommy. 132 00:06:15,100 --> 00:06:16,430 Mmm. 133 00:06:16,466 --> 00:06:20,246 Darling, don't you think your rouge is a little orangey. 134 00:06:21,383 --> 00:06:23,503 I'm remembering. 135 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:26,500 What's the matter? 136 00:06:26,830 --> 00:06:28,300 Sweetheart, have you considered bangs? 137 00:06:28,333 --> 00:06:29,423 Why? 138 00:06:29,450 --> 00:06:33,160 They took 10 years off your sister's face. 139 00:06:33,500 --> 00:06:35,380 Ma, it was the eye lift that took 10 years off. 140 00:06:35,416 --> 00:06:38,276 The bangs just covered up the scars. 141 00:06:38,316 --> 00:06:43,326 So... [chuckling] Have I told you how glad I am that you're here? 142 00:06:43,366 --> 00:06:45,656 Of course you are. 143 00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:47,220 Otherwise, you would be up at the crack of dawn 144 00:06:47,250 --> 00:06:49,420 making blintzes for your husband. 145 00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:53,470 Little Miss Sleep Till 10:30. 146 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:57,180 So have I told you how glad I am that you're here? 147 00:06:59,183 --> 00:07:02,253 Darling, rush and bring these to your husband. 148 00:07:02,283 --> 00:07:04,833 Tell him you made them. 149 00:07:04,116 --> 00:07:05,396 I don't need the credit. 150 00:07:06,483 --> 00:07:10,833 Ma, you're doing that thing again. 151 00:07:10,116 --> 00:07:12,396 -What thing? -You know, that thing that caused me 152 00:07:12,433 --> 00:07:15,233 to weigh 140 pounds in fifth grade. 153 00:07:16,283 --> 00:07:19,333 Darling, I don't mean to criticize 154 00:07:19,366 --> 00:07:23,156 but that man that you married is a prince. 155 00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:25,430 You should wait on him hand and foot. 156 00:07:25,466 --> 00:07:28,446 He's a big step up from anything we thought 157 00:07:28,483 --> 00:07:30,203 you would wind up with. 158 00:07:37,450 --> 00:07:40,330 Oh, good, more blintzes. 159 00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:42,380 -They're delicious. -Thank you, darling. 160 00:07:42,416 --> 00:07:44,176 Fran made them. 161 00:07:48,466 --> 00:07:50,416 What's the matter? You look so tense. 162 00:07:50,450 --> 00:07:53,270 Oh, no, I just got a slight headache. That's all. 163 00:07:53,300 --> 00:07:57,160 Oy, let Mamala take care of that. 164 00:07:57,500 --> 00:07:59,320 No, really, it's fine. Really, it's.... 165 00:07:59,350 --> 00:08:01,370 Ooh, that does feel good. 166 00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:05,233 Oy, you have beautiful hair. 167 00:08:05,266 --> 00:08:08,146 Morty had gorgeous hair like this. 168 00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:11,403 Till he lost it at the Pirates of the Caribbean. 169 00:08:11,433 --> 00:08:13,833 Whoosh! 170 00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:21,276 Hey, Fran, about your mother? 171 00:08:21,316 --> 00:08:23,346 What? I said I was glad she's here! 172 00:08:25,233 --> 00:08:27,503 Yeah, I can see that. 173 00:08:27,830 --> 00:08:30,170 Oh, your father was right. Your father was right. 174 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:34,330 Oh, this was a big mistake. I've already had three muffins, 175 00:08:34,660 --> 00:08:36,500 a box of cereal, and about 16 puddings, 176 00:08:36,830 --> 00:08:37,480 and I've only been with her 20 minutes today. 177 00:08:39,350 --> 00:08:41,300 Hey, Fran, what does it mean when your mother says 178 00:08:41,333 --> 00:08:44,223 she likes your sweater but on somebody else? 179 00:08:44,250 --> 00:08:47,200 It means I gotta get her out of this house. 180 00:08:47,233 --> 00:08:48,423 You know, it'll be fine. 181 00:08:48,450 --> 00:08:51,330 It's all for the best because I'll be happy. 182 00:08:51,660 --> 00:08:52,370 And you know what? Your father will be even happier. 183 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:55,220 Because he wants her out even more than I do. 184 00:08:56,333 --> 00:09:02,303 ♪ Climb upon my knee Sonny Boy ♪ 185 00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:06,323 ♪ Though you're forty-three Sonny Boy ♪ 186 00:09:20,133 --> 00:09:21,203 Honey? 187 00:09:21,233 --> 00:09:23,173 Oh, where's Max? 188 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:26,500 Your mother took him to Sears to have his portrait taken. 189 00:09:29,830 --> 00:09:31,220 Boy, are they getting clingy. 190 00:09:31,250 --> 00:09:33,830 You know, I didn't realize when I married Max 191 00:09:33,116 --> 00:09:35,326 that I was marrying my whole family too. 192 00:09:36,416 --> 00:09:39,316 You know, I know Mr. Sheffield thinks that I'm too old 193 00:09:39,350 --> 00:09:41,660 for the poster for his new show, 194 00:09:41,100 --> 00:09:43,370 but perhaps if he saw me in print. 195 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:45,660 This is your high school photo. 196 00:09:46,233 --> 00:09:48,123 I know, but I could look like that again 197 00:09:48,150 --> 00:09:50,330 if the lights were in the perfect position. 198 00:09:50,660 --> 00:09:51,200 Off? 199 00:09:53,660 --> 00:09:55,470 Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie. I'm just lashing out. 200 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,200 It's Ma. She has got to go. 201 00:09:58,233 --> 00:10:01,423 Well, why don't you just tell her that you think it's time for her to leave? 202 00:10:01,450 --> 00:10:04,200 How can I bust up Harold and Maude? 203 00:10:06,333 --> 00:10:08,353 I don't understand what happened all of a sudden. 204 00:10:08,383 --> 00:10:10,253 Why is he so attached to her? 205 00:10:10,283 --> 00:10:12,003 You met his mother. 206 00:10:12,330 --> 00:10:14,330 You saw how she paid him no attention at the wedding. 207 00:10:14,366 --> 00:10:16,246 -She wasn't even there. -Hello. 208 00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:21,330 Don't you see? He's never been pampered before. 209 00:10:21,660 --> 00:10:23,160 Do you know that when he was a child and cried, 210 00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:25,380 his mother left him out in the garden until he stopped? 211 00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:27,276 Oh, that's horrible. 212 00:10:27,316 --> 00:10:29,416 Yes, and you wonder why he clings to Sylvia. 213 00:10:29,450 --> 00:10:32,380 The poor man is starved for nurturing and affection. 214 00:10:32,416 --> 00:10:34,266 And I can only go so far. 215 00:10:36,500 --> 00:10:38,100 Oh, my poor Maxwell. 216 00:10:38,133 --> 00:10:40,423 And here I was too lazy to get out of bed 217 00:10:40,450 --> 00:10:44,830 and make him a lousy blintz this morning. 218 00:10:44,116 --> 00:10:45,276 Well, that's all gonna change. 219 00:10:45,316 --> 00:10:48,326 From here on in, I am going to give him everything 220 00:10:48,660 --> 00:10:50,330 that he was deprived of as a child. 221 00:10:50,660 --> 00:10:52,180 Love, warmth, comfort. 222 00:10:52,216 --> 00:10:54,426 But first, I'm gonna make up for him being bottle-fed. 223 00:11:05,433 --> 00:11:07,153 Oh, God. 224 00:11:07,183 --> 00:11:08,323 Did Niles die? 225 00:11:10,216 --> 00:11:12,396 Honey, can't a wife order some lunch from a deli 226 00:11:12,433 --> 00:11:15,133 and pretend she made it for her husband without a big to-do? 227 00:11:16,183 --> 00:11:18,203 I'm just trying to pamper your father. 228 00:11:18,233 --> 00:11:21,003 Well, then why didn't you make the food yourself? 229 00:11:21,330 --> 00:11:24,000 Well, because I'm too young to be a widow. 230 00:11:24,330 --> 00:11:27,370 Oh, he is going to be so excited 231 00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:30,170 when I show up at Michael's photo shoot 232 00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:33,350 with this great special picnic basket. 233 00:11:33,383 --> 00:11:37,403 Fran, these blintzes are delicious. You have to give me the recipe. 234 00:11:37,433 --> 00:11:41,183 Val, I already told you that I'm pretending to make it. 235 00:11:41,216 --> 00:11:43,496 Well, let me tell you something, girl. 236 00:11:43,830 --> 00:11:44,180 They taste real. 237 00:11:49,266 --> 00:11:52,426 Niles, hurry up! I'm ready to go to Michael's photo shoot. 238 00:11:52,466 --> 00:11:56,296 Sweetie, cut the price tag off of this afghan that I knitted your father. 239 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:10,270 Yo. 240 00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:16,100 Niles, Michael was the one that got the modeling job. 241 00:12:16,133 --> 00:12:19,133 Yes, I know, but when Carol Haney got sick inThe Pajama Game, 242 00:12:19,166 --> 00:12:23,196 Shirley MacLaine went on in her place and became a star. 243 00:12:23,233 --> 00:12:26,003 Yeah, you know, it's trivia like that that really works 244 00:12:26,330 --> 00:12:29,300 against this whole machismo thing that you're going after. 245 00:12:29,333 --> 00:12:30,423 All right. Thank you. 246 00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:32,380 -Wish me luck. -Good luck. 247 00:12:34,830 --> 00:12:35,220 [door closes] 248 00:12:40,660 --> 00:12:42,250 Come on then, people. Let's see smiling. 249 00:12:42,283 --> 00:12:45,663 Think fun, think passion. 250 00:12:45,100 --> 00:12:46,230 Think paychecks. 251 00:12:49,830 --> 00:12:52,160 You know, Michael's working out very well, Margaret. 252 00:12:52,500 --> 00:12:53,400 I'm glad we hired him. 253 00:12:53,433 --> 00:12:56,483 Yeah, but don't you think he would look better without those girls? 254 00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:58,480 -Uh, which ones? -All of them. 255 00:13:00,330 --> 00:13:02,180 Oh, darling, don't get jealous. 256 00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:04,326 It's just work. 257 00:13:04,660 --> 00:13:05,170 Fire them, Daddy. 258 00:13:10,160 --> 00:13:11,470 When's lunch? 259 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,400 Darling, you just had an Altoid. You can't eat again until Tuesday. 260 00:13:21,316 --> 00:13:24,366 Oh, Kaitlin, how many times do I have to tell you 261 00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:26,180 I'm a married man? 262 00:13:26,216 --> 00:13:29,096 I'll tell Kaitlin, and then I'll kill her. 263 00:13:29,133 --> 00:13:31,473 Oh, Fran, darling, what are you doing here? 264 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:33,220 Oh, sweetie. 265 00:13:33,250 --> 00:13:35,200 I just wanted to pop in 266 00:13:35,233 --> 00:13:39,303 and see if you're okay and tell you how much I love you 267 00:13:39,333 --> 00:13:42,473 and make sure you're warm and comfortable. 268 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,180 Oh, that's very sweet of you, darling, but I'm really very busy. 269 00:13:45,216 --> 00:13:47,326 Haven't had a chance to stop. 270 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:50,450 [sniffing] Do I smell your mother's kugel mit raisins? 271 00:13:50,483 --> 00:13:54,133 Oh, now, Ma's not the only one that can cook. 272 00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:55,366 I made this myself. 273 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:58,320 Now, come sit down and let me pamper you. 274 00:13:58,350 --> 00:14:02,000 -Mmm. -Fran, why are you doing this? 275 00:14:02,330 --> 00:14:07,000 Because you were left out in the garden. 276 00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:13,166 Darling, I know that makes sense in here, 277 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:15,470 but I'm out here. 278 00:14:17,183 --> 00:14:19,483 Oh, sweetie, I love you so much. 279 00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:22,230 I just wanna fuss over you like Ma does. 280 00:14:22,266 --> 00:14:24,326 Yeah, but if I wanted someone 281 00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,220 to cook and clean and fuss over me, I'd have married Niles. 282 00:14:26,250 --> 00:14:30,170 Oh, and you didn't think this look worked for me. 283 00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:33,120 Come. Come on, darling. I have a lot of work to do here, 284 00:14:33,150 --> 00:14:36,100 so why don't I just finish up and you go home, 285 00:14:36,133 --> 00:14:39,353 light some candles, and get the Jacuzzi ready for us, hmm? 286 00:14:39,383 --> 00:14:41,123 Oh, sweetie, I'd love to, 287 00:14:41,150 --> 00:14:43,200 but, you know, Mom and Dad booked the Jacuzzi for tonight. 288 00:14:44,166 --> 00:14:45,196 What do you mean booked? 289 00:14:46,116 --> 00:14:47,376 They made up a schedule. 290 00:14:50,660 --> 00:14:51,450 Find that pretty irritating, don't you? 291 00:14:53,116 --> 00:14:54,176 No, no, I... 292 00:14:54,216 --> 00:14:56,246 I enjoy having your mother around. 293 00:14:56,283 --> 00:14:58,483 She's a lot of fun. She makes... 294 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:01,420 She makes-- Well, all right, maybe your parents do have a few quirks. 295 00:15:01,450 --> 00:15:05,220 and sometimes I do find it a little annoying that I can't use my own Jacuzzi, 296 00:15:05,250 --> 00:15:07,170 my own golf clubs, my own limo. 297 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:08,380 -Uh-huh. Uh-huh. -But... 298 00:15:08,416 --> 00:15:11,656 You see, you want people living in your house, 299 00:15:11,100 --> 00:15:14,370 then you're not gonna always get the stuff that you want when you want it. 300 00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:17,170 Remember when you wanted me and Ma came walking in 301 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:20,420 withThe Godfather, one, two and three? 302 00:15:20,450 --> 00:15:22,200 Let's just say for our own sake, 303 00:15:22,233 --> 00:15:24,833 I agree with you, there's nothing we can do about it. 304 00:15:24,116 --> 00:15:26,146 Freida kicked your mother out and that's that. 305 00:15:26,183 --> 00:15:28,333 Yeah. 306 00:15:28,660 --> 00:15:31,270 Unless we could figure out a way to get Freida to sing at our wedding. 307 00:15:32,116 --> 00:15:34,246 What? 308 00:15:34,283 --> 00:15:38,173 Honey, you know that camcorder that we keep in our bedroom? 309 00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:40,130 -Yeah. -Well, I just figured out 310 00:15:40,166 --> 00:15:42,326 a whole new way to use it. 311 00:15:42,660 --> 00:15:43,100 Love you. 312 00:15:44,283 --> 00:15:46,323 -Did you okay this concept? -Hmm? 313 00:15:52,250 --> 00:15:53,370 [doorbell rings] 314 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:55,500 Hurry up, Ma! 315 00:15:55,830 --> 00:15:56,300 The Good Humor man is here. 316 00:15:56,333 --> 00:15:58,173 I want toasted almond. 317 00:16:00,300 --> 00:16:03,160 That's not Ricky, that's Freida. 318 00:16:03,500 --> 00:16:04,270 Oops! My mistake. 319 00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:06,350 -Syl. -Free. 320 00:16:06,383 --> 00:16:08,273 Oh, well, this is off to a good start. 321 00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:10,450 We're on half-name basis. 322 00:16:10,483 --> 00:16:12,433 Ma, we were very insensitive 323 00:16:12,466 --> 00:16:15,496 to Aunt Freida's feelings when we told her 324 00:16:15,830 --> 00:16:17,470 -that she couldn't sing at the wedding. -I was very hurt. 325 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,330 And I'm not talking to you. 326 00:16:20,660 --> 00:16:22,430 You know I have that exact skirt in blue. 327 00:16:22,466 --> 00:16:24,116 They make it in blue? 328 00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:27,100 Well, teal, but mine has Western stitching. 329 00:16:27,133 --> 00:16:30,203 Ah. I don't look too good in thatHee-Haw look. 330 00:16:30,233 --> 00:16:32,483 No, you could carry it. 331 00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:35,350 This is how you say "I'm sorry" in Jewish. 332 00:16:35,383 --> 00:16:38,333 I'm still not talking to her. 333 00:16:38,660 --> 00:16:41,280 But if you see one in teal, pick me up one. 334 00:16:41,316 --> 00:16:43,146 All right. 335 00:16:43,183 --> 00:16:46,273 Since Freida wasn't at the wedding, I thought it would be nice 336 00:16:46,300 --> 00:16:49,280 if we all watched the wedding video together. 337 00:16:49,316 --> 00:16:53,246 Honey, why don't you turn it on and we'll see it. 338 00:16:55,330 --> 00:16:57,200 ["Bridal Chorus" playing] 339 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:12,100 She looks so beautiful. 340 00:17:12,483 --> 00:17:14,153 [blowing nose] 341 00:17:15,216 --> 00:17:16,366 What the hell is this? 342 00:17:18,450 --> 00:17:21,000 That's your ticket home, Ma. 343 00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:24,160 ["Hava Nagila" playing] 344 00:17:24,500 --> 00:17:25,220 [rhythmic clapping] 345 00:17:27,466 --> 00:17:30,146 [singing in Hebrew] 346 00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:48,000 Listen, I don't wanna say anything, 347 00:17:48,330 --> 00:17:51,120 but could this chicken be drier? 348 00:17:51,150 --> 00:17:54,660 I'll take the dry chicken over the fishy salmon. 349 00:17:54,100 --> 00:17:55,400 Mmm. Mmm. 350 00:17:55,433 --> 00:17:59,473 I don't know about you, girls, but my sea bass is delicious! 351 00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:01,420 [laughing] 352 00:18:06,483 --> 00:18:10,333 "Hey, why doesn't Aunt Freida sing? She's better than Lisa Minnelli." 353 00:18:10,660 --> 00:18:12,220 -Liza. Liza Minnelli. -Liza Minnelli. 354 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:15,200 [Fran as Sylvia] I'll have you know, 355 00:18:15,233 --> 00:18:17,123 Freida's the best singer in the world 356 00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:20,420 and anyone who disagrees can settle it with me! 357 00:18:20,450 --> 00:18:24,300 Oh, I have a little request from my darling Sylvala 358 00:18:24,333 --> 00:18:27,303 who's always been like an older sister to me. 359 00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:30,100 Hit it. 360 00:18:30,133 --> 00:18:32,503 [playing piano] 361 00:18:35,416 --> 00:18:39,446 ♪ I remember you ♪ 362 00:18:39,483 --> 00:18:45,233 ♪ You're the one who made My dreams come true ♪ 363 00:18:45,266 --> 00:18:49,396 ♪ A few kisses ago ♪ 364 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:58,160 ♪ I remember too A distant bell ♪ 365 00:18:58,500 --> 00:19:03,500 ♪ And stars That fell like rain ♪ 366 00:19:03,830 --> 00:19:07,830 ♪Out of the blue 367 00:19:09,330 --> 00:19:12,280 ♪When my life is through 368 00:19:12,316 --> 00:19:18,316 ♪ And the angels Ask me to recall ♪ 369 00:19:18,350 --> 00:19:25,000 ♪ Oh, the thrill of it all ♪ 370 00:19:25,330 --> 00:19:28,470 ♪ Then I shall tell them ♪ 371 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:34,120 ♪ I remember ♪ 372 00:19:34,150 --> 00:19:39,470 ♪ You ♪ 373 00:19:41,233 --> 00:19:42,303 [people applauding] 374 00:19:42,333 --> 00:19:43,353 Thank you. 375 00:19:43,383 --> 00:19:45,183 [sobbing] 376 00:19:45,216 --> 00:19:48,326 -My God, Freida, that was beautiful. -Thank you. 377 00:19:48,366 --> 00:19:51,296 Unfortunately, you can't stop after one number. 378 00:19:51,333 --> 00:19:54,183 There's a Gershwin medley, a salute to Kander and Ebb-- 379 00:19:54,216 --> 00:19:56,416 Oh, Ma, would you just say "I'm sorry" to Freida? 380 00:19:59,233 --> 00:20:02,153 Does the teal skirt come with a matching jacket? 381 00:20:10,116 --> 00:20:13,446 I think so, but I can't promise that it has Western stitching. 382 00:20:26,830 --> 00:20:29,150 Well, darling, you know, I have to admit, I'm gonna miss your mother 383 00:20:29,183 --> 00:20:30,433 when she leaves. 384 00:20:32,216 --> 00:20:35,296 ♪Climb upstairs with me Sonny Boy 385 00:20:36,433 --> 00:20:39,423 ♪The Jacuzzi's finally free Sonny Boy 386 00:20:45,233 --> 00:20:48,333 Love, warmth, comfort. 387 00:20:48,660 --> 00:20:51,660 But first, I'm gonna make up for him being breast-fed. 388 00:21:00,316 --> 00:21:04,656 Love, warmth, support. 389 00:21:04,100 --> 00:21:06,270 But first I'm gonna make up for him being breast-- 390 00:21:09,133 --> 00:21:11,133 [laughing] 391 00:21:11,166 --> 00:21:13,246 Love, warmth, comfort. 392 00:21:13,283 --> 00:21:16,333 But first, I'm gonna make up for him being bottle-fed. 393 00:21:19,450 --> 00:21:21,250 [screaming excitedly] 394 00:21:46,100 --> 00:21:47,400 [theme music ends]