1
00:00:00,601 --> 00:00:02,501
♪♪

2
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:12,344
  Narrator: Coming up, why is q
   raging against the machine?

3
00:00:12,346 --> 00:00:15,480
          [ laughter ]

4
00:00:15,482 --> 00:00:18,483
    Narrator: Do sal and mur
        have dance fever?

5
00:00:18,485 --> 00:00:21,353
          [ laughter ]

6
00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:25,023
     And which losing joker
   will be in puppet purgatory

7
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,558
    In tonight's punishment?

8
00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:28,627
          [ laughter ]

9
00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:31,496
              Sal:
 Prepare for something amazing.

10
00:00:31,498 --> 00:00:32,631
  Q: Hey, mustache, what's up?

11
00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:34,232
          [ laughter ]

12
00:00:34,234 --> 00:00:35,900
       Murr: Like a boss!

13
00:00:35,902 --> 00:00:37,702
          [ laughter ]

14
00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:40,372
              Sal:
I will never forgive you!

15
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,441
           Joe: Larry!

16
00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:43,442
          [ laughter ]

17
00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:46,578
     Q: Oh, not the monkeys.

18
00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:48,246
          Today, these
         beautiful faces

19
00:00:48,248 --> 00:00:49,648
        Will be the first
         beautiful faces

20
00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:51,383
       The people see when
   they walk into the office.

21
00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:53,585
    That's right,
but working as receptionists,

22
00:00:53,587 --> 00:00:55,854
We've got to do and say
what the other guys tell us.

23
00:00:55,856 --> 00:00:58,190
             If you refuse to do
      or say anything, you lose.

24
00:00:58,192 --> 00:01:00,993
                     ♪♪

25
00:01:00,995 --> 00:01:02,594
            Q: Okay! Joey, joey.

26
00:01:02,596 --> 00:01:03,728
Yeah.
              Pick up the phone.

27
00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:05,864
               Be on the phone
      when this person walks in.

28
00:01:05,866 --> 00:01:07,932
 "hey, look, if it was up to me,
               I'd drown it."

29
00:01:07,934 --> 00:01:09,802
    Look, if it was up to me,
       I'd just drown it.

30
00:01:09,804 --> 00:01:11,069
                I'll bury it
               in the morning.

31
00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,137
         I just bury it
         in the morning.

32
00:01:13,139 --> 00:01:15,073
    Hi. Welcome.
          [ laughter ]

33
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:16,741
          How are you,
     sheriff anthony banana?

34
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,276
       Are you
sheriff anthony banana?

35
00:01:18,278 --> 00:01:19,611
I'm not.

36
00:01:19,613 --> 00:01:21,346
             Sorry.
        Wrong challenge.

37
00:01:21,348 --> 00:01:22,747
          [ laughter ]

38
00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:25,484
 I'm sorry. It's --
that's the wrong challenge.

39
00:01:25,486 --> 00:01:27,552
          [ laughter ]

40
00:01:27,554 --> 00:01:29,954
              Q: Alright, joe,
 without using any words at all,

41
00:01:29,956 --> 00:01:32,090
             Get him to stand up
          and do a twirl for you

42
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,358
             And then sit back.

43
00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:35,360
     [ laughs ]
if you got this, man...

44
00:01:35,362 --> 00:01:36,294
 If you get this...

45
00:01:36,296 --> 00:01:37,496
 [ inhales deeply ]

46
00:01:37,498 --> 00:01:39,631
        Um...

47
00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:41,566
     [ stammers,
  stifles chuckle ]

48
00:01:41,568 --> 00:01:43,435
          [ laughter ]

49
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:48,173
♪♪

50
00:01:48,175 --> 00:01:50,975
          [ laughter ]

51
00:01:50,977 --> 00:01:53,445
                     ♪♪

52
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,980
              I don't know why
              I bother to try!

53
00:01:55,982 --> 00:02:00,519
   Joe, say to him, "you know,
 uh, I recently got a nose job."

54
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:01,854
   I recently got
     a nose job.

55
00:02:01,856 --> 00:02:02,855
               A nose job? Ah.

56
00:02:02,857 --> 00:02:03,788
          Didn't take.

57
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:06,525
Well, it didn't take.

58
00:02:06,527 --> 00:02:07,992
           I look like a toucan.

59
00:02:07,994 --> 00:02:09,127
I kind of, you know --

60
00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:12,397
 My friends call me
 the italian toucan.

61
00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:13,798
   So, I was like,
"oh, maybe I'll get it fixed,"

62
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,868
And then the doctors couldn't do
anything about it.

63
00:02:15,870 --> 00:02:17,402
    My nose is too far gone.

64
00:02:17,404 --> 00:02:18,737
     My nose is
    too far gone.

65
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:21,606
          [ laughter ]

66
00:02:21,608 --> 00:02:22,741
Sal: Joe, joe, just go,

67
00:02:22,743 --> 00:02:23,876
"they had to get rid
 of the fish tank."

68
00:02:23,878 --> 00:02:25,544
 I'm sorry that this
 is so bare in here.

69
00:02:25,546 --> 00:02:26,478
 They had to get rid
  of the fish tank.

70
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:27,946
Sal: "on account of me
  almost drowning."

71
00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:29,281
 They had to get --
they had to get rid of it.

72
00:02:29,283 --> 00:02:31,283
I used to be, like, right here
where this magazine rack is.

73
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:33,485
                       Oh, okay.
But I almost drowned.

74
00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:34,953
We trying to play
               with the fish?

75
00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:36,354
         No.
I was trying to get in.

76
00:02:36,356 --> 00:02:38,223
                Q: I dropped
             my cellphone in it.

77
00:02:38,225 --> 00:02:39,692
I dropped my cellphone in,
   and I was like,

78
00:02:39,694 --> 00:02:41,293
"oh, I got to get it,"
 so I went in and...

79
00:02:41,295 --> 00:02:42,494
         "I don't I don't swim."
  ...I don't swim.

80
00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,429
And next thing you know,

81
00:02:44,431 --> 00:02:47,566
I'm knee deep up into
this yellow tang fish.

82
00:02:47,568 --> 00:02:48,967
     You know --
did you ever see "finding dory"?

83
00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:50,034
                         Yes.
    Not that one.

84
00:02:50,036 --> 00:02:50,703
   The other one.

85
00:02:50,705 --> 00:02:52,036
The other fish.

86
00:02:52,038 --> 00:02:53,037
What was the other --
   the other fish?

87
00:02:53,039 --> 00:02:54,239
  Not -- not dory.

88
00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:55,840
The little orange one.

89
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,242
Sal: Like, a marlin.

90
00:02:57,244 --> 00:02:58,643
          [ laughter ]

91
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,044
A full 6-foot marlin.

92
00:03:00,046 --> 00:03:03,448
[ chuckling ] we had --
we had a full 6-foot marlin.

93
00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:06,251
     [ laughs ]
    in this tank.

94
00:03:06,253 --> 00:03:07,786
          [ laughter ]

95
00:03:07,788 --> 00:03:10,655
He basically bounced off one
side of the tank to the other.

96
00:03:10,657 --> 00:03:11,790
And my cellphone fell in,

97
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:13,658
 And I had to go up
against this marlin,

98
00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:15,193
  And I'm not gonna
 lose my cellphone.

99
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,395
        Sal:
The sea was angry that day.

100
00:03:16,397 --> 00:03:18,597
The sea was -- [laughs]
the sea was angry that day.

101
00:03:18,599 --> 00:03:20,332
              It must have been
  a pretty traumatic experience.

102
00:03:20,334 --> 00:03:21,466
   For the marlin.

103
00:03:21,468 --> 00:03:23,868
          [ laughter ]

104
00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:25,604
There's a good 10, 15 seconds
 where I didn't know

105
00:03:25,606 --> 00:03:26,805
How I was going to turn out,
if I'm gonna be honest

106
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:28,807
 With each other.
Q: And I loved that marlin, too.

107
00:03:28,809 --> 00:03:29,608
And I loved that marlin.

108
00:03:29,610 --> 00:03:30,609
      Murr: Marlin and me.

109
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:33,545
It was marlin and me.

110
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:34,679
        Yeah.

111
00:03:34,681 --> 00:03:36,548
          [ laughter ]
            [ ding! ]

112
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,082
                     ♪♪

113
00:03:38,084 --> 00:03:39,284
Joe: Q, you're gonna have
 somebody coming in in a minute.

114
00:03:39,286 --> 00:03:41,353
     Just tell them to take
   a seat anywhere, of course,

115
00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:43,221
    Except the memorial seat
    that you see right there.

116
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,758
R.I.P. Johnny calabash.
          R.I.P., baby.

117
00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:47,492
       A little crossover
        with dinner party

118
00:03:47,494 --> 00:03:49,027
      You guys put together
           here today.

119
00:03:49,029 --> 00:03:50,428
           Here we go.

120
00:03:50,430 --> 00:03:51,764
     Hello. Hi.
                         Hi!

121
00:03:51,766 --> 00:03:53,832
Uh, please have a seat
 anywhere you like,

122
00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:55,900
Except for the memorial chair,
of course.
                         Okay.

123
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,035
     Obviously.
     Thank you.

124
00:03:57,037 --> 00:04:00,105
                This was recent?
Ooh, very recent, yeah.

125
00:04:00,107 --> 00:04:00,839
   Morning shift.

126
00:04:00,841 --> 00:04:02,975
  Morning shift.
                         Aw.

127
00:04:02,977 --> 00:04:04,643
  They came in here
and brought all that in.

128
00:04:04,645 --> 00:04:06,511
                 What happened?
He was in a focus group...

129
00:04:06,513 --> 00:04:08,446
  Joe: And he was doing great.
...And he was doing great.

130
00:04:08,448 --> 00:04:09,581
    Then, all of a sudden...

131
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:11,183
All of a sudden...
      ...Out of nowhere...

132
00:04:11,185 --> 00:04:12,917
...Out of nowhere...
   ...He made funny noises...

133
00:04:12,919 --> 00:04:15,187
...He made, like,
   funny noises...
     ...Fell to the floor...

134
00:04:15,189 --> 00:04:16,921
...Fell to the floor...
       ...Flipped over...

135
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,523
...Flipped over...
            ...Died.

136
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:20,192
      ...Died.

137
00:04:20,194 --> 00:04:22,795
          [ laughter ]
      yeah.

138
00:04:22,797 --> 00:04:23,796
               That was today?

139
00:04:23,798 --> 00:04:25,197
   That was today.

140
00:04:25,199 --> 00:04:26,999
          [ laughter ]

141
00:04:27,001 --> 00:04:28,733
          [ whirring ]

142
00:04:28,735 --> 00:04:30,469
     Is the automatic vacuum
           coming out?

143
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:31,736
          You hate it.

144
00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:32,737
                [ chuckles ]

145
00:04:32,739 --> 00:04:34,006
   It's your job to clean up.

146
00:04:34,008 --> 00:04:37,409
 It's<i> my</i> job to keep
  this area clean.

147
00:04:37,411 --> 00:04:40,145
-Murr: Un-oh!
          -Joe: Un-oh!

148
00:04:40,147 --> 00:04:44,082
          [ laughter ]

149
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:45,684
     He's got flip-flops on!

150
00:04:45,686 --> 00:04:48,086
         He can't be --
                           oh!

151
00:04:48,088 --> 00:04:49,087
        Watch your foot!

152
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:51,156
        Watch your foot!
        You got toes out.

153
00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:53,425
You didn't think anybody was
gonna see those flip-flops, huh?

154
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:56,094
          [ laughter ]

155
00:04:56,096 --> 00:04:58,497
I can't believe how much
you destroyed that thing.

156
00:04:58,499 --> 00:05:00,098
     [ laughter continues ]

157
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:01,900
     "they'll be right with you,
                  arianna."

158
00:05:01,902 --> 00:05:03,902
     Excuse me.
They're gonna be right with you.

159
00:05:03,904 --> 00:05:05,504
        Uh...

160
00:05:05,506 --> 00:05:07,172
          [ laughter ]

161
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:09,441
    They're gonna
     be right...

162
00:05:09,443 --> 00:05:10,909
         "miss grande."

163
00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:13,578
          [ laughter ]

164
00:05:13,580 --> 00:05:14,913
Sal: "hello, starbucks."

165
00:05:14,915 --> 00:05:16,381
   Hey, starbucks.
     Yeah, uh...

166
00:05:16,383 --> 00:05:17,582
 I'll have a grande.

167
00:05:17,584 --> 00:05:19,852
          [ laughter ]

168
00:05:19,854 --> 00:05:21,119
     Okay, guys.

169
00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:23,388
I can't do it, guys.

170
00:05:23,390 --> 00:05:24,456
Well, I'll give you another one.
We'll give you another one.

171
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:26,124
      Murr: Yeah, we'll give you
             another one, buddy.

172
00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,726
"now that's your real hair,
       then?"

173
00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:32,130
          [ laughter ]

174
00:05:32,132 --> 00:05:35,400
Hey, it's me again.

175
00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:37,469
So, we got a third strike
      on this.

176
00:05:37,471 --> 00:05:38,671
          [ laughter ]

177
00:05:38,673 --> 00:05:40,205
 Yeah, we'll give you one more.
    We'll give you one more.

178
00:05:40,207 --> 00:05:41,540
     Sal: Sure.

179
00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:43,475
      I was squatting over
a handheld mirror the other day.

180
00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:44,743
    I didn't like what I saw.

181
00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:46,611
          [ laughter ]
 sal: Okay. Sure.

182
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:50,215
               Murr: Oh, yeah.
               There's no way.

183
00:05:50,217 --> 00:05:51,216
You're not saying it,
       right?

184
00:05:51,218 --> 00:05:52,217
    I'm assuming
you're not saying it.

185
00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:53,485
   You can put it
     right here.

186
00:05:53,487 --> 00:05:55,287
           [ buzzer! ]
[ laughter ]

187
00:05:55,289 --> 00:05:58,022
       Joe: Alright, murr.

188
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,892
         The first thing
  I want you to say to her is,

189
00:05:59,894 --> 00:06:01,025
     "where the hell did you
        get that haircut?

190
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:02,294
     It's [bleep] awesome."

191
00:06:02,296 --> 00:06:04,296
          [ laughter ]

192
00:06:04,298 --> 00:06:06,164
Where the hell did you
get that [bleep] haircut?

193
00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:07,299
    It's awesome.

194
00:06:07,301 --> 00:06:09,301
          [ laughter ]

195
00:06:09,303 --> 00:06:10,969
                 Oh. Thanks.

196
00:06:10,971 --> 00:06:12,304
  Sal: Now get up,
    walk around,

197
00:06:12,306 --> 00:06:14,306
And change that sign
  in front to zero.

198
00:06:14,308 --> 00:06:15,774
   The sign being
 the one that says,

199
00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:17,175
    "it has been
   this many days

200
00:06:17,177 --> 00:06:18,977
Since a woman has
been in his office."

201
00:06:18,979 --> 00:06:21,380
        Just change this
          real quick...

202
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:28,186
        Okay.

203
00:06:28,188 --> 00:06:30,655
          [ laughter ]

204
00:06:30,657 --> 00:06:31,856
  For some reason,

205
00:06:31,858 --> 00:06:34,859
We've been doing nothing
but male-based focus groups.

206
00:06:34,861 --> 00:06:36,795
 They had gillette,
shaving cream for men.

207
00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:37,862
                Hang and dangle.
[ chuckles ]

208
00:06:37,864 --> 00:06:39,264
               Have you heard
             of hang and dangle,

209
00:06:39,266 --> 00:06:40,532
             The clothing line?

210
00:06:40,534 --> 00:06:42,534
 Do you know the --
the men's -- the clothing --

211
00:06:42,536 --> 00:06:43,868
  They're the men's
  clothing company.

212
00:06:43,870 --> 00:06:45,404
    What was it?
Hanging dangle.

213
00:06:45,406 --> 00:06:47,272
          [ laughter ]
                hang<i> and</i> dangle.

214
00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:48,540
  Hang and dangle.

215
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:49,674
        It's like a male
           lululemon.

216
00:06:49,676 --> 00:06:50,943
   It's like...
          [ laughter ]

217
00:06:50,945 --> 00:06:52,877
It's like a male lululemon.
                         Okay.

218
00:06:52,879 --> 00:06:54,879
You know? Hang and dangle.

219
00:06:54,881 --> 00:06:56,815
          [ laughter ]

220
00:06:56,817 --> 00:06:58,750
    Joe: Oh, let me just set
     a reminder real quick.

221
00:06:58,752 --> 00:06:59,818
Let me set a reminder.

222
00:06:59,820 --> 00:07:01,286
           Hey, siri.
    Hey, siri.

223
00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:03,822
   Remind me to pick mom up...
Remind me to pick mom up...

224
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,690
...From the doctor tomorrow...
...From the doctor tomorrow...

225
00:07:05,692 --> 00:07:08,560
          ...At 12:00.
   ...At 12:00 p.M.

226
00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:09,962
           Siri:<i> Okay.</i>

227
00:07:09,964 --> 00:07:12,564
 <i> I'll remind you to dick mom up</i>
     <i> at the doctor tomorrow</i>

228
00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:15,167
           <i> At 12:00.</i>
    Sal: "dick mom up."

229
00:07:15,169 --> 00:07:17,169
Didn't realize I have it
connected to bluetooth.

230
00:07:17,171 --> 00:07:18,370
      Let me...

231
00:07:18,372 --> 00:07:21,239
Hey, siri,<i> pick</i> mom up
  from the doctor.

232
00:07:21,241 --> 00:07:22,641
             <i> Okay.</i>

233
00:07:22,643 --> 00:07:25,243
 <i> I'll remind you to dick mom up</i>
     <i> at the doctor tomorrow</i>

234
00:07:25,245 --> 00:07:27,512
<i> At 12:00.</i>

235
00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:29,047
    [ stammers ]
                          yeah.

236
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:31,316
Hey, siri,<i> pick</i> mom up
  from the doctor.

237
00:07:31,318 --> 00:07:32,717
 <i> Pick</i> mom up --
             <i> okay.</i>

238
00:07:32,719 --> 00:07:35,320
 <i> I'll remind you to dick mom up</i>
     <i> at the doctor tomorrow</i>

239
00:07:35,322 --> 00:07:36,388
           <i> At 12:00.</i>

240
00:07:36,390 --> 00:07:38,323
  Alright. I guess
 I'm dicking up mom.

241
00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:39,724
I guess I'm dicking up --

242
00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:41,593
          [ laughter ]

243
00:07:41,595 --> 00:07:43,395
      Alright.
I guess I'm dicking up mom.

244
00:07:43,397 --> 00:07:46,130
          [ laughter ]

245
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,466
            [ ding! ]
        joe: There it is!

246
00:07:47,468 --> 00:07:49,468
Alright, boys.
            Sal's up.

247
00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:52,004
Murr: Here we go, buddy.
              Q: Quick question.

248
00:07:52,006 --> 00:07:54,473
         Is there any reason you
  couldn't be soaking wet today?

249
00:07:54,475 --> 00:07:55,273
    Here, let me
 ask you a question.

250
00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:57,009
 Is there any reason

251
00:07:57,011 --> 00:08:00,145
That you couldn't be
 soaking wet today?

252
00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:02,280
                Soaking wet.

253
00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:03,882
                  I mean...

254
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:05,083
              I probably could

255
00:08:05,085 --> 00:08:06,819
            If it was for, like,
               a focus group.

256
00:08:06,821 --> 00:08:08,086
        Okay.
  "probably could."

257
00:08:08,088 --> 00:08:09,621
                So, business,
not personal.

258
00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:13,692
          [ laughter ]

259
00:08:13,694 --> 00:08:17,295
So -- so, business --

260
00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:19,364
    So, business,
    not personal.

261
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:20,765
                Yeah. [ laughs ]
 yeah. Yeah.

262
00:08:20,767 --> 00:08:23,902
       Sally, I hid some peanuts
 and an inhaler behind the desk.

263
00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:25,770
                You see them?

264
00:08:25,772 --> 00:08:27,239
            I want you to pop in
                some peanuts,

265
00:08:27,241 --> 00:08:28,440
             And after each one,

266
00:08:28,442 --> 00:08:32,845
Almost have an allergic reaction
               that kills you.

267
00:08:32,847 --> 00:08:34,213
                Here he goes.

268
00:08:38,519 --> 00:08:39,651
   [ groans ]
          [ laughter ]

269
00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:41,253
Murr: Oh, no!

270
00:08:41,255 --> 00:08:41,854
      [ gags ]

271
00:08:41,856 --> 00:08:43,455
          [ laughter ]

272
00:08:43,457 --> 00:08:44,989
    Q: Your throat's closing up,
                    bud.

273
00:08:44,991 --> 00:08:46,258
                  You okay?

274
00:08:46,260 --> 00:08:48,593
                     ♪♪

275
00:08:48,595 --> 00:08:50,262
    Close one.
          [ laughter ]

276
00:08:50,264 --> 00:08:52,397
               Q: Keep going.

277
00:08:52,399 --> 00:08:54,799
 I -- I'm allergic,
but I love them so much.

278
00:08:54,801 --> 00:08:55,734
         That might not be good.

279
00:08:55,736 --> 00:08:57,402
          [ laughter ]

280
00:08:57,404 --> 00:09:00,805
                     ♪♪

281
00:09:00,807 --> 00:09:02,941
 [ inhales deeply ]

282
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:05,343
          [ laughter ]
               you're a glutton
                for punishment.

283
00:09:05,345 --> 00:09:07,212
I used to not be able
to have them at all,

284
00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:08,213
 But then when I --

285
00:09:08,215 --> 00:09:09,548
     [ groans ]
    ...When I --

286
00:09:09,550 --> 00:09:10,348
     [ coughs ]

287
00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:12,217
              Joe:
     He's choking for real.

288
00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:14,086
    Are you choking for real?
 Yeah. [ coughs ]

289
00:09:14,088 --> 00:09:15,688
          [ laughter ]

290
00:09:15,690 --> 00:09:18,022
 [ inhales sharply ]

291
00:09:18,024 --> 00:09:20,425
   [ screeching in distance ]
          murr: Uh-oh!

292
00:09:20,427 --> 00:09:22,961
   Are those monkeys screaming
      again in the kitchen?

293
00:09:22,963 --> 00:09:24,963
         Q: Oh, not the monkeys.

294
00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:26,030
  Joe: Go get those
    monkey, sal.

295
00:09:26,032 --> 00:09:26,899
                   Uh-oh!

296
00:09:26,901 --> 00:09:28,701
        Go silence them.

297
00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,271
♪♪

298
00:09:32,273 --> 00:09:33,672
   [ screeching in distance ]
          murr: Uh-oh!

299
00:09:33,674 --> 00:09:36,407
   Are those monkeys screaming
      again in the kitchen?

300
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,343
         Q: Oh, not the monkeys.

301
00:09:38,345 --> 00:09:41,080
   -Go get those monkey, sal.
             -Uh-oh!

302
00:09:41,082 --> 00:09:42,213
 Give me one second.

303
00:09:42,215 --> 00:09:43,482
        Go silence them.

304
00:09:43,484 --> 00:09:46,017
 Enough! Enough!
      [ screeching stops ]

305
00:09:46,019 --> 00:09:47,286
     Go back up.

306
00:09:47,288 --> 00:09:49,220
          [ laughter ]
        that was so loud.

307
00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:51,090
      [ sighs ]

308
00:09:51,092 --> 00:09:52,691
It's gonna be a problem
      anymore.

309
00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:54,826
         They're actually taking
the focus group test,

310
00:09:54,828 --> 00:09:56,095
                The monkeys.

311
00:09:56,097 --> 00:09:57,629
          [ laughter ]

312
00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:03,434
The monkeys are taking
their own focus group test.

313
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:04,970
                     Oh.

314
00:10:04,972 --> 00:10:06,972
        What type of focus group
              are they testing?

315
00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:09,440
  You know the way they figured
 out that monkeys like bananas?

316
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:10,509
Well, you know the way
  they figured out

317
00:10:10,511 --> 00:10:12,443
That monkeys like bananas?

318
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:13,378
            Monkey focus groups.

319
00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:14,913
Monkey focus groups.

320
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,448
                  Oh, okay.
     Yeah.

321
00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:17,649
            You know,
elephants and peanuts?

322
00:10:17,651 --> 00:10:20,251
Elephants and peanuts.
    Focus groups.
                    Yeah, yeah.

323
00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:21,786
        -Shark, surfers.
    -What was the other one?

324
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,855
  Sharks, surfers.
                      Oh, wow.

325
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:25,657
  We never knew it
till the focus group.

326
00:10:25,659 --> 00:10:27,926
             [ chuckles ] jeez.

327
00:10:27,928 --> 00:10:30,195
  I can't even wait
till they get fully licensed.

328
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:34,599
          [ laughter ]

329
00:10:34,601 --> 00:10:36,401
            [ ding! ]
    joe: There you go, buddy.

330
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:39,004
      Narrator: Q got stuck
      in the waiting room,

331
00:10:39,006 --> 00:10:42,007
        So he's first up
on the loser board.

332
00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:43,809
Today, we're teaming up
   at jay sweets,

333
00:10:43,811 --> 00:10:46,077
Giving presentations
about event planning

334
00:10:46,079 --> 00:10:47,746
   To a room full
 of everyday folks.

335
00:10:47,748 --> 00:10:49,480
    That doesn't sound easy.
             It's not easy, sal,

336
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,483
      Because the presentation's
    been made by the other guys.

337
00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:53,018
         And even though
     we're on the same team,

338
00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:54,686
     One guy will be giving
        the presentation

339
00:10:54,688 --> 00:10:56,487
        And the other guy
      will play an attendee

340
00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:58,557
    That's trying to help him
make sense of it all.

341
00:10:58,559 --> 00:11:00,091
                 At the end,
     we'll ask by show of hands,

342
00:11:00,093 --> 00:11:01,893
                 Did anybody
               learn anything?

343
00:11:01,895 --> 00:11:05,164
     And the team with the least
   amount of hands raised loses.

344
00:11:05,166 --> 00:11:06,431
       -It won't be easy.
      -Doesn't sound easy?

345
00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:07,499
               It's not easy.

346
00:11:07,501 --> 00:11:10,435
                     ♪♪

347
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:12,437
     Hey, how are you doing?

348
00:11:12,439 --> 00:11:14,840
              Oh, no, q's back!

349
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,575
   [ laughs ]
                   q's back!

350
00:11:16,577 --> 00:11:18,377
                  I forgot
           about this character.

351
00:11:18,379 --> 00:11:21,580
Thanks so much. My name is joe,
    and I'm an event planner.

352
00:11:21,582 --> 00:11:23,248
We made these slides.
They've never seen them.

353
00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:24,916
  Q has to back up
everything joe says.

354
00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:26,918
           Here we go.

355
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:28,653
    Maya sol party planning.
           That's me.

356
00:11:28,655 --> 00:11:30,655
     We've done hundreds --
       hundreds of events.

357
00:11:30,657 --> 00:11:33,258
                    [ laughs ]
     "over 42."
  he has hundreds.

358
00:11:33,260 --> 00:11:35,060
              Okay?
      Utilize your guests.

359
00:11:35,062 --> 00:11:36,661
       Get the fun started
         by encouraging

360
00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:39,130
   The most attractive guests
in the room to participate.

361
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:42,267
           Wait. What?
     [ sal and murr laugh ]

362
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:43,802
 What an icebreaker!
      It's an ice breaker.

363
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:45,136
     Now we all get to argue

364
00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:47,338
      Whether this is even
     a good question to ask.

365
00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:49,008
             -Yeah.
 -I think we all know it's not.

366
00:11:49,010 --> 00:11:51,342
         [ both laugh ]
                      oh!

367
00:11:51,344 --> 00:11:53,412
         Okay. Alright.
     We'll -- we'll move on.

368
00:11:53,414 --> 00:11:55,146
      In my honest opinion,

369
00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:56,748
            Providing
    wheelchair accessibility

370
00:11:56,750 --> 00:11:58,217
  Is not something to focus on.

371
00:11:58,219 --> 00:12:00,652
[ both laugh ]

372
00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:04,423
   Good. Thank you
for not letting him get away

373
00:12:04,425 --> 00:12:06,558
With wheelchair accessibility
   doesn't matter.

374
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,027
      Q: Well, there's laws
        in place, right?

375
00:12:08,029 --> 00:12:10,029
 The state and local laws should
  have already focused on that.

376
00:12:10,031 --> 00:12:11,496
  That's already --
that's already taken care of.

377
00:12:11,498 --> 00:12:13,298
   I took it to mean that you
  wouldn't even throw an event

378
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:15,434
     At a place that wasn't
     wheelchair accessible.

379
00:12:15,436 --> 00:12:17,368
              -Yes.
            -Gotcha.

380
00:12:17,370 --> 00:12:19,971
            Oh, they justified.
[ groans ]

381
00:12:19,973 --> 00:12:21,172
              Okay?

382
00:12:21,174 --> 00:12:22,441
 Be a beacon of professionalism.

383
00:12:22,443 --> 00:12:24,776
  So, guys, here's a real-life
 experience I had to deal with.

384
00:12:24,778 --> 00:12:27,512
       "year: Two-thou 9."

385
00:12:27,514 --> 00:12:30,249
      I was in piscataway.

386
00:12:30,251 --> 00:12:32,651
  Organized a retirement party.

387
00:12:32,653 --> 00:12:34,053
        So the guy's wife
         pulls me aside

388
00:12:34,055 --> 00:12:36,521
     And makes it very clear
  she has an attraction to me.

389
00:12:36,523 --> 00:12:38,790
          What do I do?
       I resist the urge.

390
00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:41,927
      I stay professional,
  and I dm her<i> after</i> the event.

391
00:12:41,929 --> 00:12:43,662
     [ sal and murr laugh ]

392
00:12:43,664 --> 00:12:45,664
She's not a client anymore
after the event's over.

393
00:12:45,666 --> 00:12:46,498
          That's right.

394
00:12:48,735 --> 00:12:49,734
      Just to live my life.

395
00:12:49,736 --> 00:12:50,869
     You know, take a shot.

396
00:12:50,871 --> 00:12:53,605
           [ laughs ]

397
00:12:53,607 --> 00:12:55,006
    Let's check the next one.

398
00:12:55,008 --> 00:12:57,008
      People you should not
       expect a tip from.

399
00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:59,144
         [ sal laughs ]

400
00:12:59,146 --> 00:13:00,345
          The elderly.

401
00:13:00,347 --> 00:13:02,481
             Never.

402
00:13:02,483 --> 00:13:04,349
            Indians.

403
00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:06,217
     [ sal and murr laugh ]
      [ audience murmurs ]

404
00:13:06,219 --> 00:13:07,752
  No, that's because, in india,

405
00:13:07,754 --> 00:13:10,221
   Tipping's considered a bit
          of an insult.
           Joe: Right.

406
00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:11,757
Good job, q.

407
00:13:11,759 --> 00:13:13,092
              Okay.

408
00:13:13,094 --> 00:13:16,161
        Native americans.
       Girls. Irish girls.

409
00:13:16,163 --> 00:13:17,429
             -Wow...
     -[ sal and murr laugh ]

410
00:13:17,431 --> 00:13:18,697
             Blacks.

411
00:13:18,699 --> 00:13:20,299
         Hispanic girls.

412
00:13:20,301 --> 00:13:21,566
         Hispanic gays.

413
00:13:21,568 --> 00:13:23,434
           Hispanics.

414
00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:24,435
           Straights.

415
00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:25,770
             Anyone.

416
00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:27,038
       Never expect a tip.
             Q: Wow!

417
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,773
    So, what I was doing here
   was to take you down a path

418
00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:29,908
   To be like, "don't judge."

419
00:13:29,910 --> 00:13:31,910
There's one more.
  Don't expect it from anyone?

420
00:13:31,912 --> 00:13:33,645
[ remote clips ]

421
00:13:33,647 --> 00:13:35,046
           -"egypts"?
            -Egypts.

422
00:13:35,048 --> 00:13:38,317
     [ sal and murr laugh ]

423
00:13:38,319 --> 00:13:39,584
                   Egypts!

424
00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:40,852
    So, now by show of hands,
     who feels they learned

425
00:13:40,854 --> 00:13:42,121
    Something of value today?

426
00:13:42,123 --> 00:13:43,722
     One, two, three, four.

427
00:13:43,724 --> 00:13:44,990
            [ ding! ]
                          wow!

428
00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:46,792
    Alright, man.
      Come on.

429
00:13:46,794 --> 00:13:48,459
                Joe: Alright.
                 Here we go.

430
00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:49,328
      Murr: Alright, guys.

431
00:13:49,330 --> 00:13:50,529
    I go around the country,

432
00:13:50,531 --> 00:13:52,531
         Teaching people
how to plan events well.

433
00:13:52,533 --> 00:13:54,465
     We've made the presentation
                  for them.

434
00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:56,868
     It's murr's job to sell it,
             and it's sal's job

435
00:13:56,870 --> 00:13:58,469
         To help turn the crowd.
   To cheerlead.

436
00:13:58,471 --> 00:13:59,538
                    Yeah.
           He's the cheerleader.

437
00:13:59,540 --> 00:14:03,608
       Okay. Tips to make
      your party a success.

438
00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:04,743
        Make a timeline.

439
00:14:04,745 --> 00:14:06,211
     This is critical, okay?

440
00:14:06,213 --> 00:14:08,814
      11:00 a.M. -- Clean,
     set up the event space.

441
00:14:08,816 --> 00:14:10,949
   3:00 p.M. -- Prep the food.

442
00:14:10,951 --> 00:14:13,152
            Calm down
with a wine or an edible,

443
00:14:13,154 --> 00:14:16,221
        Well, you choose.
          [ laughter ]

444
00:14:16,223 --> 00:14:17,556
    I like that you're real.
        That's real talk.

445
00:14:17,558 --> 00:14:19,224
        That's real talk.
    'cause I'm into edibles.

446
00:14:19,226 --> 00:14:21,226
         I'm into wine.
          There you go.

447
00:14:21,228 --> 00:14:23,494
         [ both laugh ]
           moving on.

448
00:14:23,496 --> 00:14:26,231
 Get on board with bastille day.

449
00:14:26,233 --> 00:14:27,432
              Okay?

450
00:14:27,434 --> 00:14:30,736
          [ laughter ]

451
00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:36,508
       Murr: Get on board
       with bastille day.

452
00:14:36,510 --> 00:14:38,110
              Okay?

453
00:14:38,112 --> 00:14:41,045
          [ laughter ]

454
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:44,182
         Bastille day is
the sleeper event of the decade.

455
00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:45,650
      I just went to France
       for the first time.

456
00:14:45,652 --> 00:14:46,451
         -Is that right?
             -Yeah.

457
00:14:46,453 --> 00:14:47,586
   It's their fourth of July.

458
00:14:47,588 --> 00:14:48,653
  It is the party of a century.

459
00:14:48,655 --> 00:14:49,854
        Sal:
And especially over there.

460
00:14:49,856 --> 00:14:51,656
 We're just learning
about it now, I think.

461
00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:54,593
And, obviously, our democracy is
 based on the french democracy.

462
00:14:54,595 --> 00:14:55,994
 I mean, obviously.

463
00:14:55,996 --> 00:14:57,462
         [ both laugh ]

464
00:14:57,464 --> 00:14:59,231
      I'm learning so much
      about even planning.

465
00:15:00,801 --> 00:15:04,937
         [ both laugh ]

466
00:15:04,939 --> 00:15:06,271
         We'll move on.

467
00:15:06,273 --> 00:15:09,074
Food is a must at any event
           you throw.

468
00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:11,076
       Now a helpful tip.

469
00:15:11,078 --> 00:15:14,079
  Remove the skin and membrane
          of the animal

470
00:15:14,081 --> 00:15:16,214
   Prior to serving his flesh.

471
00:15:16,216 --> 00:15:19,084
       [ q and joe laugh ]

472
00:15:19,086 --> 00:15:20,885
      Yeah, you don't want
     a mouthful of membrane.

473
00:15:20,887 --> 00:15:22,020
  I've had it, and it's not --

474
00:15:22,022 --> 00:15:23,355
      If you don't know --
      if it's not prepared

475
00:15:23,357 --> 00:15:25,223
  The right way or whatever...
Joe: Look at the woman!

476
00:15:25,225 --> 00:15:27,692
  ...It could be pretty insane.

477
00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:29,828
      Sometimes, it's nice
    to get a chicken nugget.

478
00:15:29,830 --> 00:15:31,363
You know what I'm saying?

479
00:15:31,365 --> 00:15:33,231
       [ q and joe laugh ]

480
00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:34,499
              Okay.

481
00:15:34,501 --> 00:15:37,369
        Get the word out
        about your event.

482
00:15:37,371 --> 00:15:39,704
          90% of people
       do not go to events

483
00:15:39,706 --> 00:15:42,174
  That they do not know about,
             right?

484
00:15:42,176 --> 00:15:45,177
         Comparatively,
     only 26.2% of americans

485
00:15:45,179 --> 00:15:47,646
     Celebrate bastille day.

486
00:15:47,648 --> 00:15:50,114
     Right? Let that sink --
    [ patriotic music plays ]

487
00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:51,716
         Let it sink in.

488
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,786
       [ q and joe laugh ]

489
00:15:53,788 --> 00:15:56,388
                 [ laughs ]

490
00:15:56,390 --> 00:15:58,390
Q: Look, murray can't
  keep it together.

491
00:15:58,392 --> 00:16:01,794
[ q and joe laugh ]

492
00:16:01,796 --> 00:16:03,528
              Joe: Look at sal!

493
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:05,998
              Sal can't even --

494
00:16:07,802 --> 00:16:09,133
       Murr: There you go!

495
00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:11,536
    That's what bastille day
            is about.

496
00:16:11,538 --> 00:16:13,137
          [ laughter ]

497
00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:14,673
                  It's that
              bastille [bleep].

498
00:16:14,675 --> 00:16:16,741
                We might have
                 [bleep] up.

499
00:16:16,743 --> 00:16:18,276
  [ patriotic music continues ]

500
00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:19,277
       [ q and joe laugh ]

501
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:20,545
     The music's
    just playing.

502
00:16:20,547 --> 00:16:22,681
               Still playing.

503
00:16:22,683 --> 00:16:24,949
         Murr: Come on!
       [ q and joe laugh ]

504
00:16:24,951 --> 00:16:25,818
There you go.

505
00:16:25,820 --> 00:16:27,486
        By show of hands,
      how many of you feel

506
00:16:27,488 --> 00:16:30,622
    You've learned something
         of value today?

507
00:16:30,624 --> 00:16:32,624
  One, two, three, four, five.

508
00:16:32,626 --> 00:16:34,226
            Alright!
        I will take that.

509
00:16:34,228 --> 00:16:35,894
            [ ding! ]
                    damn it!

510
00:16:35,896 --> 00:16:38,630
            Narrator:
  Joe and q crashed this party,

511
00:16:38,632 --> 00:16:41,299
  Making q tonight's big loser.

512
00:16:41,301 --> 00:16:42,434
 Q's our big loser.

513
00:16:42,436 --> 00:16:43,635
 We're all at home,

514
00:16:43,637 --> 00:16:45,370
  But, q, you don't
  have the day off.

515
00:16:45,372 --> 00:16:47,372
             If you don't mind,
             we need you to run

516
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:48,973
A couple of errands
                for us today.

517
00:16:48,975 --> 00:16:50,709
     No, I mind.
   I do mind them

518
00:16:50,711 --> 00:16:53,178
I'm hanging out in my robe.
I'm with benjamin cat.

519
00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:55,047
   It's a day off.
I mind a lot, actually.

520
00:16:55,049 --> 00:16:56,448
       Sure, q, but that's
       not how this works.

521
00:16:56,450 --> 00:16:57,982
         So, here's what
       we need you to do.

522
00:16:57,984 --> 00:17:01,319
   There's a car waiting for you
  in the lot of our high school,

523
00:17:01,321 --> 00:17:04,389
     And that's all I can really
             speak on right now.

524
00:17:04,391 --> 00:17:05,990
Yeah, you won't be able
  to miss the car.

525
00:17:05,992 --> 00:17:08,060
  We promise.
[ laughter ]

526
00:17:08,062 --> 00:17:10,395
       Q: Alright. Let me
      get dressed, I guess.

527
00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:15,668
                     ♪♪

528
00:17:15,670 --> 00:17:18,937
     ♪<i> drive, drive, drive,</i>
         <i> drive, drive</i> ♪

529
00:17:18,939 --> 00:17:22,074
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪

530
00:17:22,076 --> 00:17:25,009
     We're like the muppets
           right now.

531
00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:27,345
  How many songs do they play?

532
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:29,882
            One song?
   ♪<i> two, three, four, five</i> ♪

533
00:17:29,884 --> 00:17:31,884
         [ laughs ] oh!

534
00:17:31,886 --> 00:17:36,354
  Look, is the plan to make me
   drive the car off the road?

535
00:17:36,356 --> 00:17:39,491
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪
I feel like I ate mushrooms.

536
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:41,894
     [ indistinct singing ]
       [ cellphone rings ]

537
00:17:41,896 --> 00:17:44,229
      [ singing continues ]

538
00:17:44,231 --> 00:17:46,765
                [ laughing ]
     you [bleep] son of a bitch!

539
00:17:46,767 --> 00:17:48,500
                This is going
             to drive me insane.

540
00:17:48,502 --> 00:17:50,569
      Sorry, but you lost.
                     Why me?

541
00:17:50,571 --> 00:17:52,437
              Give this to sal.

542
00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:53,972
                 Why did you
             make me come here?

543
00:17:53,974 --> 00:17:55,708
        Well, I'm hungry.

544
00:17:55,710 --> 00:17:57,175
           I need you
     to bring me some food.

545
00:17:57,177 --> 00:17:58,643
Oh, my god.
                 Is that it?

546
00:17:58,645 --> 00:18:00,779
             I'm driving around
              delivering food,

547
00:18:00,781 --> 00:18:02,180
               While this shit
             plays in the back?

548
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:03,181
       You're "qubereats."

549
00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,649
                  Alright.
        What do you want to eat?

550
00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:06,384
 One of my favorite restaurants,
         unfortunately,

551
00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:08,186
      Is midtown manhattan.

552
00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:09,521
          Veggie grill.

553
00:18:09,523 --> 00:18:11,590
            You want me to drive
 into manhattan with this shit?!

554
00:18:11,592 --> 00:18:14,058
  [ laughs ] I mean, you should
take their advice, buddy.

555
00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:15,059
       You got a long day
          ahead of you.

556
00:18:15,061 --> 00:18:16,728
        You should drive,
         drive, drive --

557
00:18:16,730 --> 00:18:18,130
              Alright. Alright.
          I'm hanging up on you.

558
00:18:18,132 --> 00:18:20,198
           Goodbye. I'll see you
           in about three hours.

559
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,534
               Yeah, goodbye.
      Let's drive, drive, drive.

560
00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,470
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪
                   here we go.

561
00:18:25,472 --> 00:18:27,005
                This is gonna
               be a long day.

562
00:18:27,007 --> 00:18:29,007
              I'm going to buy
into this,

563
00:18:29,009 --> 00:18:30,742
              And I'm gonna try
             and enjoy this song

564
00:18:30,744 --> 00:18:31,876
           For as long as I can.

565
00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:33,545
                  At least
             there's no traffic.

566
00:18:33,547 --> 00:18:35,013
         ♪<i> four, five</i> ♪

567
00:18:35,015 --> 00:18:38,350
  ♪<i> let's drive, drive, drive,</i>
         <i> drive, drive</i> ♪

568
00:18:38,352 --> 00:18:43,822
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪

569
00:18:43,824 --> 00:18:46,358
         [ laughs ] hey!

570
00:18:46,360 --> 00:18:49,361
      Just cruising around
 the greatest city in the world.

571
00:18:49,363 --> 00:18:50,428
         ♪<i> four, five</i> ♪

572
00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:51,830
With a bunch of singing puppets.

573
00:18:51,832 --> 00:18:54,967
♪<i> drive, drive, drive,</i>
         <i> drive, drive</i> ♪

574
00:18:54,969 --> 00:18:57,169
           [ faintly ]
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪

575
00:18:57,171 --> 00:19:00,038
 Oh, my god. Let's get this food
      and get it to gatto.

576
00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:02,307
            [ ding! ]

577
00:19:02,309 --> 00:19:04,709
        Now we're headed
      to joe gatto's house.

578
00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:06,244
    Hour, 45, two hours away,

579
00:19:06,246 --> 00:19:08,246
     So do me a favor, guys.

580
00:19:08,248 --> 00:19:12,250
 Keep singing this [bleep] song
         the entire way.

581
00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:13,251
            ♪<i> drive</i> ♪

582
00:19:13,253 --> 00:19:15,720
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪

583
00:19:15,722 --> 00:19:18,123
        This is the worst
road trip ever.

584
00:19:18,125 --> 00:19:20,325
      [ singing continues ]
        [ metal creaks ]

585
00:19:20,327 --> 00:19:21,393
       [bleep] this song.

586
00:19:21,395 --> 00:19:23,328
        The squeaking --
   it sounds like a mouse orgy

587
00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:24,997
         Is taking place
        in this car now.

588
00:19:24,999 --> 00:19:28,133
     ♪<i> drive, drive, drive,</i>
         <i> drive, drive</i> ♪

589
00:19:28,135 --> 00:19:31,136
      Oh, my god! It sucks!

590
00:19:31,138 --> 00:19:32,604
     I'm gonna need therapy
           after this.

591
00:19:32,606 --> 00:19:34,539
            [ ding! ]
         [ horn honks ]

592
00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:35,940
                    Here you go.
What'd you do to it?

593
00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:38,877
     I didn't do anything to it.
That's good.

594
00:19:38,879 --> 00:19:40,212
     You didn't
   get it from me.

595
00:19:40,214 --> 00:19:41,746
                   Laxative?
  I don't know.

596
00:19:41,748 --> 00:19:42,947
Murray's food might get
  something in it.

597
00:19:42,949 --> 00:19:46,819
                        Oh!
 [ laughs ]

598
00:19:46,821 --> 00:19:48,687
                 So who am I
                going to now?

599
00:19:48,689 --> 00:19:49,688
I'm pretty sure sal.

600
00:19:49,690 --> 00:19:51,756
            So, I'm driving back
              to staten island?

601
00:19:51,758 --> 00:19:53,358
     Bye, buddy.

602
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,360
            Is that the fountain
                sal got you?

603
00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:57,095
   [ laughs ] oh!

604
00:19:57,097 --> 00:19:58,963
          Ha ha ha ha!
           Take that!

605
00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:01,233
Take your stupid fountain.

606
00:20:01,235 --> 00:20:02,167
              Dick!

607
00:20:02,169 --> 00:20:03,035
            [ ding! ]

608
00:20:03,037 --> 00:20:04,636
       One delivery down.
           Two to go.

609
00:20:04,638 --> 00:20:06,238
       [ cellphone rings ]

610
00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:09,508
           Oh, my god.
        It's unbearable.

611
00:20:09,510 --> 00:20:10,843
                Yeah, I know.

612
00:20:10,845 --> 00:20:13,178
   Alright. So listen, buddy.
      This is what I want.

613
00:20:13,180 --> 00:20:15,714
     I want the crave case.
     I want it with cheese.

614
00:20:15,716 --> 00:20:17,649
 I want it from the white castle
          in the bronx

615
00:20:17,651 --> 00:20:19,117
       That we filmed at.

616
00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:22,721
                Come on, man!
          You're two hours away!

617
00:20:22,723 --> 00:20:25,390
♪<i> one, two, three, four, five ♪</i>

618
00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:27,659
  Bronx. There's a white castle
        on staten island.

619
00:20:27,661 --> 00:20:30,662
        It's not even far
        from sal's place.

620
00:20:30,664 --> 00:20:32,330
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪

621
00:20:32,332 --> 00:20:34,799
         This song just
      obliterates thought.

622
00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:37,670
       I can't even focus
          on anything.

623
00:20:37,672 --> 00:20:39,872
        Ah! White castle.

624
00:20:39,874 --> 00:20:42,207
   ♪<i> two, three, four, five ♪</i>

625
00:20:42,209 --> 00:20:43,075
            [ ding! ]
            alright.

626
00:20:43,077 --> 00:20:44,676
          Next stop --
      staten island, baby.

627
00:20:44,678 --> 00:20:45,944
     ♪<i> drive, drive, drive,</i>
<i> drive, drive</i> ♪

628
00:20:45,946 --> 00:20:47,946
           Oh, my god!
      This [bleep] traffic!

629
00:20:47,948 --> 00:20:50,949
         [ horns blare ]

630
00:20:50,951 --> 00:20:54,619
     [ indistinct singing ]
        [ horns blaring ]

631
00:20:54,621 --> 00:20:56,354
           Oh, my god!

632
00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:57,723
   ♪<i> two, three, four, five</i> ♪

633
00:20:59,459 --> 00:21:05,096
        [ horns blaring ]
      this [bleep] traffic!

634
00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:06,231
            Oh, god.

635
00:21:06,233 --> 00:21:07,699
          Why traffic?

636
00:21:07,701 --> 00:21:09,301
           I feel like
     I'm gonna start crying.

637
00:21:09,303 --> 00:21:10,502
        [ horns blaring ]

638
00:21:10,504 --> 00:21:11,503
           [ ticking ]

639
00:21:11,505 --> 00:21:13,038
 ♪<i> one, two, three, four, five ♪</i>

640
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:14,306
         [ sighing ] oh!

641
00:21:14,308 --> 00:21:15,507
[ cellphone rings ]

642
00:21:15,509 --> 00:21:17,443
     ♪<i> drive, drive, drive ♪</i>
         where are you?

643
00:21:17,445 --> 00:21:19,044
                 Oh, my god!

644
00:21:19,046 --> 00:21:21,713
               I hope somebody
                firebombs me.

645
00:21:21,715 --> 00:21:25,317
     [ music plays faintly ]

646
00:21:25,319 --> 00:21:27,653
 ♪<i> one, two, three, four, five ♪</i>

647
00:21:27,655 --> 00:21:29,521
       I'm gonna drive us
     right off this bridge.

648
00:21:29,523 --> 00:21:32,791
  ♪<i> let's drive, drive, drive,</i>
         <i> drive, drive</i> ♪

649
00:21:32,793 --> 00:21:35,793
 Oh, my god. At least we're back
 on staten island for a minute.

650
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:37,463
            [ ding! ]
    let's deliver this crap.

651
00:21:37,465 --> 00:21:39,331
[ horn honks ]
                 oh, yeah, yeah.

652
00:21:39,333 --> 00:21:41,733
   Oh, shut up.
           ♪ are we there yet? ♪

653
00:21:41,735 --> 00:21:43,335
     ♪ well, then it's one, two,
             three, four, five ♪

654
00:21:43,337 --> 00:21:46,805
There's your crave case.

655
00:21:46,807 --> 00:21:48,406
                [ laughing ]
             you look like shit.

656
00:21:48,408 --> 00:21:49,607
Dude, I am harrowed.

657
00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:51,543
                  That song
              is all over you.

658
00:21:51,545 --> 00:21:54,212
         [ both laugh ]

659
00:21:54,214 --> 00:21:55,147
              Good job, buddy.

660
00:21:55,149 --> 00:21:56,482
           -Thank you.
          -Keep it up.

661
00:21:56,484 --> 00:21:57,615
                   Lunch!

662
00:21:57,617 --> 00:22:00,018
[ cellphone rings ]
          murr: Hey, q!

663
00:22:00,020 --> 00:22:01,153
                     Aw!

664
00:22:01,155 --> 00:22:02,420
          You look like
     you're having a blast.

665
00:22:02,422 --> 00:22:04,556
                  I got it.
             I got the routine.

666
00:22:04,558 --> 00:22:06,091
                Just tell me
               what you want.

667
00:22:06,093 --> 00:22:08,160
   What did the other guys do?
        What did sal get?

668
00:22:08,162 --> 00:22:09,761
                 Sal wanted
                white castle.

669
00:22:09,763 --> 00:22:11,096
           Oh, my god.
      That sounds perfect.

670
00:22:11,098 --> 00:22:13,899
 I would love white castle, too,
    but the one in the bronx.

671
00:22:13,901 --> 00:22:16,034
You want me to go all the way
             back to the bronx,

672
00:22:16,036 --> 00:22:17,769
         Where I just came from?
        I want the best,

673
00:22:17,771 --> 00:22:19,637
   And that's my favorite one.
            It's not happening.

674
00:22:19,639 --> 00:22:21,173
      I'll make a deal with you.

675
00:22:21,175 --> 00:22:24,642
       Joe gave me this laxative
         to slip into your food.

676
00:22:24,644 --> 00:22:26,644
           I promise to not mess
           with your food at all

677
00:22:26,646 --> 00:22:28,246
           If you just let me go

678
00:22:28,248 --> 00:22:30,182
             To the white castle
             on the way to you.

679
00:22:30,184 --> 00:22:31,517
                   Please!

680
00:22:31,519 --> 00:22:33,719
My friend,
        you have a deal.

681
00:22:33,721 --> 00:22:36,388
           Absolutely!
                    Ahhhhh!

682
00:22:36,390 --> 00:22:38,857
    A white castle on the way
       is a-okay with me.

683
00:22:38,859 --> 00:22:42,660
  ♪<i> let's drive, drive, drive,</i>
         <i> drive, drive</i> ♪

684
00:22:42,662 --> 00:22:44,196
          White castle.

685
00:22:44,198 --> 00:22:45,531
              Yes!

686
00:22:45,533 --> 00:22:47,199
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪
                    here you go.

687
00:22:47,201 --> 00:22:48,600
           Thank you!
            [ ding! ]

688
00:22:48,602 --> 00:22:51,336
     Alright. Let's get this
       to murray's house.

689
00:22:51,338 --> 00:22:54,472
     ♪<i> well, then it's one,</i>
<i> two, three, four, five</i> ♪

690
00:22:54,474 --> 00:22:56,474
 I feel like I'm losing my mind.

691
00:22:56,476 --> 00:22:57,876
   The squeaking's gotta stop.

692
00:22:57,878 --> 00:22:59,477
          ♪<i> ...Drive</i> ♪
       [ squeaking stops ]

693
00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:02,280
♪<i> it feels so good to be alive</i> ♪

694
00:23:02,282 --> 00:23:03,815
   Enough with the squeaking.

695
00:23:03,817 --> 00:23:06,552
           Oh, my god!

696
00:23:06,554 --> 00:23:09,821
   ♪<i> well, then it's one, two,</i>
      <i> three, four, five</i> ♪

697
00:23:09,823 --> 00:23:11,156
          Choke on it!

698
00:23:11,158 --> 00:23:12,490
            ♪<i> let's</i> ♪

699
00:23:12,492 --> 00:23:15,961
 I think I fixed the squeaking,
        guys. [ laughs ]

700
00:23:15,963 --> 00:23:17,963
       No more squeaking.

701
00:23:17,965 --> 00:23:20,899
     [ upbeat music plays ]

702
00:23:20,901 --> 00:23:24,903
[ singing gibberish ]

703
00:23:24,905 --> 00:23:28,840
   ♪ then it's time to drive,
      drive, drive, drive ♪

704
00:23:28,842 --> 00:23:30,308
            [ ding! ]
         [ horn honks ]

705
00:23:30,310 --> 00:23:31,777
              -Hey!
           -[ laughs ]

706
00:23:31,779 --> 00:23:33,311
    You made it!

707
00:23:33,313 --> 00:23:35,247
                  Hey, bud.
               How you doing?

708
00:23:35,249 --> 00:23:37,849
     Oh, my god.

709
00:23:37,851 --> 00:23:39,585
 Congratulations, q.

710
00:23:39,587 --> 00:23:41,319
  It's over.
                   It's over?

711
00:23:41,321 --> 00:23:42,388
         Well, bad news for you.

712
00:23:42,390 --> 00:23:44,456
              I'm never getting
             in this car again.

713
00:23:44,458 --> 00:23:47,325
             So, see you later.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.

714
00:23:47,327 --> 00:23:49,127
Q,
you're blocking my car in.

715
00:23:49,129 --> 00:23:51,263
       I'm not blocking nothing.
              I don't own that.

716
00:23:51,265 --> 00:23:52,397
              That's not mine.

717
00:23:52,399 --> 00:23:54,132
 What, are you ki--

718
00:23:54,134 --> 00:23:55,601
   Can I give you
    a ride home?

719
00:23:55,603 --> 00:23:58,203
             Nah, I'm good, bud.

720
00:23:58,205 --> 00:24:00,939
          ♪ drive, drive, drive,
           drive, drive, drive ♪

721
00:24:00,941 --> 00:24:02,775
                 [ cackles ]


