1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:09,960
This programme contains
violent scenes and images of
the deceased from the very start

2
00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:17,960
that viewers may find distressing,
strong language, offensive
and discriminatory attitudes,

3
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:25,960
and scenes of a sexual
nature throughout

4
00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:49,840
What is that?!

5
00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:52,480
What is that?!

6
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,080
Ah-ha!

7
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:47,920
All right, George?

8
00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:56,400
I...normally park at
the Richmond Street car park.

9
00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:36,120
Oh, it's still pay and display in
this one, the app doesn't work.

10
00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:37,200
I'll treat you.

11
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:39,400
You gonna be here all day?

12
00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:40,640
That depends, don't it?

13
00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:44,680
Fucking hell.

14
00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:57,680
You watching tonight?

15
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:01,640
Is that a football question?

16
00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:04,680
Yes.

17
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,120
No.

18
00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:22,200
So, you've got this place
and the house?

19
00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:24,840
Yeah. But I'm mortgaged to death.

20
00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:27,520
You try making money
out of hospitality.

21
00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:29,240
The house is thanks to my parents.

22
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:31,640
I sold theirs and bought
number 5.

23
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:32,840
So, they were rich?

24
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:36,120
What, do I look like Lord Struthers
of Morningside?

25
00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:38,640
They just had a nice terraced house
in Dundee,

26
00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,720
so I murdered them
and got the money.

27
00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:44,600
What, and then you got this place
with Curtis?

28
00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:46,800
Yep. That is my punishment.

29
00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:48,960
I'm buying him out
and it's taking for ever,

30
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:51,960
cos it costs a fortune.
He still gets 20% of the profits,

31
00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:55,640
which is kind of 20%
of not very much, but still...

32
00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:57,080
The bastard.

33
00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:00,720
I'm seeing him tonight,
as a matter of fact.

34
00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:05,000
With his newly beloved.

35
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:07,280
So, this is the thing.
Sometimes when you touch it,

36
00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:08,680
you get a shock.

37
00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:12,920
Oh, well. It's fine now. Typical.

38
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:15,600
But when it zaps you,
that fuse goes.

39
00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:21,720
This one. It trips.
Is that the right word? Trips?

40
00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:23,200
I'm gonna have to turn
the power off.

41
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:24,920
I've got the office upstairs,
I still need to work.

42
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:26,080
Yeah, well, I can isolate that.

43
00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,360
When did you last
get your condition report?

44
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:31,080
Um, November '25. We're up to date.

45
00:04:31,120 --> 00:04:34,760
So, who did your test for you?
Ashbury's.

46
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,480
But they charge 500 quid
just for a visit.

47
00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:39,680
Yeah, I don't trust 'em.

48
00:04:39,720 --> 00:04:42,000
Do you know where they get
their staff from?

49
00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:44,480
Aruba. Do you know where that is?

50
00:04:44,520 --> 00:04:47,000
The Caribbean? Exactly.

51
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:49,240
And I'm not being racist.
Well, a little bit.

52
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:53,600
I mean, think about it.

53
00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:54,800
Aruba.

54
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:57,600
Who owns that?

55
00:04:57,640 --> 00:04:59,000
The Netherlands.

56
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:03,560
And in the Netherlands,
the mains wiring is 230 volts,

57
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,600
and in Aruba it's 127 volts,

58
00:05:05,640 --> 00:05:08,880
so it's two different systems.
It's like a fire trap.

59
00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:12,120
And why do they do that, eh?
Have two different voltages?

60
00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:14,920
Tesla.

61
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,640
What, like, Elon Musk?

62
00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:18,960
No, Nikolai Tesla.

63
00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:21,680
He was the man who invented AC/DC.

64
00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:24,440
And when he died,
the FBI took all his papers

65
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,960
and they burnt them
so no-one could see them.

66
00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,760
And then Elon Musk named his company
after him.

67
00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,840
That's no coincidence, is it?

68
00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:33,280
Meaning?

69
00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:35,520
Exactly. It's a mystery.

70
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:39,560
When I was young,
AC/DC meant bisexual.

71
00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,760
Look, there's nothing wrong
with this,

72
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:47,680
but I need to get back here,
strip everything away, all right?

73
00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:50,480
Is that gonna cost?
Well, it's all gonna cost, innit?

74
00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:53,560
Well, you know, I'm not being rude,
but you know what happens.

75
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,280
You get an electrician in
and they go,

76
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:56,560
"Oh, everything needs rewiring,"

77
00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:59,960
and a job that was gonna cost
100 quid ends up costing 10,000.

78
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,760
You calling me a liar?

79
00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:03,440
No.

80
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:05,520
The way people talk about workmen.

81
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:07,240
Nobody else would put up with it.

82
00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:09,920
Imagine if I walked in here,
eh, and got a pint and said,

83
00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,000
"Have you watered this down?"

84
00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:14,760
You'd get right on your high horse,
wouldn't you?

85
00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:17,160
Do you water it down? No.

86
00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,400
Well, there's your first mistake,
isn't it?

87
00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:22,880
Paying your ex 20%?
I'd start diluting it, mate.

88
00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:25,400
Oh. You're here early.

89
00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:27,760
Oh, yeah, this is Clive,
the electrician.

90
00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:29,440
Hi, Clive. I'm Judy.

91
00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:31,320
Don't charge us a million quid,
yeah?

92
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:39,000
Ah, he's the one I told you
about! Mm-hm. Clive, from next door.

93
00:06:39,040 --> 00:06:42,040
I met his son online,
and I mean online.

94
00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:45,240
He's 16, but said 18, vers bottom.

95
00:06:45,280 --> 00:06:46,960
So, what did you do?

96
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,600
Oh, I fucked him. Oh, Leo!

97
00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:52,200
Get off! It was mortifying.
Said he was zero metres away.

98
00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:55,160
Zero! He must've seen me, though.

99
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,320
You cheeky little bitch.

100
00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:04,720
But I will be the one
to block him, thank you very much.

101
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:08,400
It's my street and I was gay before
he was even a single spunk.

102
00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:11,560
Oh, my God, now I'm thinking about
his father ejaculating.

103
00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:13,400
This is such a terrible day,

104
00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,520
and to top it all I'm seeing
Curtis tonight.

105
00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,320
Talking of tops.

106
00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:19,880
What for?

107
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:22,120
We're being civilised.

108
00:07:23,760 --> 00:07:26,160
Could you not talk to him, though?
The lad, what's his name?

109
00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:28,400
George. What would we talk about?
Morning, Zee. Morning.

110
00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:30,240
Zee, boy next door, 16,

111
00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:32,640
looking for sex online
and lying about his age.

112
00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:33,800
Should Leo not have a word?

113
00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,240
His dad's downstairs,
the electrician.

114
00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:37,960
But his dad doesn't know he's gay,
so do not say anything.

115
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,320
How do you know he doesn't know?

116
00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:41,320
Because George is alive.

117
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,200
That's a bit 1980s.

118
00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:44,960
You'd be surprised,
times are changing.

119
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,720
Not with this family, trust me.

120
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:49,040
Sit at home with a bad dad
and you're as closeted as ever.

121
00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:50,880
Why are you employing him, then?
Ahem.

122
00:07:50,920 --> 00:07:53,400
Could you just go
and do some work, thank you?

123
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:55,320
Are you mates with him? The boy?

124
00:07:55,360 --> 00:07:57,320
Why would I be mates with
a 16-year-old?

125
00:07:57,360 --> 00:07:59,800
What would we even talk about?
about? Bluey?

126
00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:02,720
No, I've hardly said two words
to him. He's just like, "Hello."

127
00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:05,520
Oh, I dunno, best not then.
Oh, don't take his side.

128
00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:08,280
Yeah, but I can see what he means.
It's a funny line to cross.

129
00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:09,720
So, the kid goes online,

130
00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:11,880
hooks up, and gets murdered,
and that's fine?

131
00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:13,640
But at least he wouldn't have
died a virgin.

132
00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:16,720
Oh, power's back on. Hooray.

133
00:08:18,480 --> 00:08:19,760
It's weird, innit,

134
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,880
how we know more about his son
than he does.

135
00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:25,000
His wife said he had an affair.

136
00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:27,000
For real? In a caravan park.

137
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:29,760
Oh. Like Jenny and Lee
on Gogglebox?

138
00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:33,680
Maybe it was Jenny.Sh!Don't.

139
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:35,840
He can't hear us.

140
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:39,040
He can't hear us down there,
can he? Nah, course not. No.

141
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,560
Clive!

142
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,320
Yeah?

143
00:08:48,280 --> 00:08:49,280
Nothing!

144
00:08:51,560 --> 00:08:53,800
I'll start putting these back.

145
00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,280
Well, thanks, yeah. Clive.

146
00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:58,320
Nice to meet ya. I'm Zee.

147
00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:04,640
What's that short for, then?

148
00:09:04,680 --> 00:09:07,880
It's not. I'm just Zee.
I chose it myself.

149
00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:11,720
How come?

150
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:15,800
I just did. It's a placeholder
till I find the right name.

151
00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:17,200
I'm Hanna.

152
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:19,640
My girlfriend chose it.
She says it's delicate.

153
00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:23,360
How many of you are there?

154
00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:27,320
Morning, all.
OK, then. What have we got?

155
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:29,200
No, no, it's straightforward.

156
00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:32,640
You just had a broken earth cable,
so I just replaced it. It's done.

157
00:09:32,680 --> 00:09:34,800
But...?

158
00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:38,480
No, no, you were just unlucky.
Put in a new cable. All done.

159
00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:41,480
Oh, OK. Great. Well, that's good.

160
00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:45,720
But... Oh, I knew it. How much?

161
00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:48,800
No, it's just this here.
I mean, look at it.

162
00:09:48,840 --> 00:09:51,320
You've got the whole thing running
out of one socket.

163
00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:54,280
You've got your sound system,
your lights, your mic.

164
00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:56,440
What else is plugged in here?

165
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:59,680
Smoke machine. Bubble machine.
Oil wheel.

166
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:01,720
Well, look forward to the inquest
when you're all burnt

167
00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:04,600
to death. But, look,
I can strip away that wall,

168
00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:08,520
I can rewire it and put in
five sockets. 800 quid, all in.

169
00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:10,840
How long are we out of action?
No, it'll just take me one night.

170
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:13,400
I can isolate this wall
so you can keep the bar open.

171
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:17,920
600. 800. All right?
And that's final.

172
00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:20,840
It's not just the electrics, is it?

173
00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:23,080
You know, I've gotta redecorate
and patch it all in.

174
00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:25,680
So, 800 gets you my lad in, my son.

175
00:10:25,720 --> 00:10:28,920
He's got level 3 joinery,
so he can tidy it all up

176
00:10:28,960 --> 00:10:30,680
and then seal it off for you.

177
00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:32,600
How old's your son? 25.

178
00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:33,880
He's got two sons.

179
00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:37,440
Why?

180
00:10:37,480 --> 00:10:39,200
What do you mean?

181
00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:41,920
Just you have two sons.

182
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:44,000
So?

183
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:46,560
Nothing.

184
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:49,440
Why'd you say that?

185
00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:55,160
I just did, because you have,
haven't you?

186
00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,760
Does it matter?

187
00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:01,800
No.

188
00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,400
OK, great. Um...

189
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:10,520
700. 800, all right?

190
00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,160
And then we're, er...

191
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:15,880
..disco.

192
00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,600
Hey! Go on, Clive. Woo!

193
00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:29,320
That's enough. I'll get started.
Er...

194
00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:32,400
What did you get on the van?
Two hours? Yeah.

195
00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:36,280
All right, well, you'd better make
it all day, hadn't you? Your treat.

196
00:11:38,880 --> 00:11:40,120
See you later.

197
00:11:56,600 --> 00:11:57,600
Ha-ha.

198
00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,960
Ah, I'm running late.

199
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,440
Get a taxi and pick me up
at 7.30, OK?

200
00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:22,280
Why are we having dinner
with your ex? No fucking idea.

201
00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:26,520
Curtis and Maggie at home. At ten
o'clock we are leaving, OK? Bye.

202
00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:29,800
He doesn't know what he's
talking about.

203
00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:32,520
He was a shit player
and he's a shit pundit, I told you.

204
00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:34,640
He doesn't know what he's fucking
talking about, he's a...

205
00:12:34,680 --> 00:12:37,160
Oh, he's always
on the fucking drink.

206
00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:40,080
Oh...

207
00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:42,120
Wahey!

208
00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:48,800
Not in front of my dad,
he's a married man. Put it away!

209
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:51,560
Hey, somewhere to park
my bike, anyway.

210
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:33,120
Bloody flipping Curtis and stupid,
bloody thick flipping Maggie.

211
00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:36,960
Deep breath.

212
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:40,200
Hi! Hey!

213
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:42,720
Maggie, Maggie, Maggie,
out, out, out.

214
00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:44,560
Oh, that dates you.
Sorry we're late.

215
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,840
Oh, you look wonderful.
Nice to see you.

216
00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:50,640
Oh, I saw Sanjay!
Yeah, I know. He said.

217
00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:52,040
It's been ages. How you been?

218
00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:57,160
Er, not bad. Not bad. Yeah. You're
looking older and fatter and greyer.

219
00:13:57,200 --> 00:13:58,760
And you're beginning to smell.

220
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:02,360
Let me take that.

221
00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:04,720
So...who else is coming?

222
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:08,280
Oh, er, well, it's just us.

223
00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:11,720
Yeah, I thought we could catch up.
Have a chance to talk, you know.

224
00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:13,560
Talk about what?

225
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,640
You know, things. Come on through.

226
00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:23,800
Is that enough for you?

227
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:31,160
And he grabs my laptop and runs.
I mean,

228
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,120
he's, what, 6' 3", all muscles.

229
00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:34,240
I mean, he's only 25 years old,

230
00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:37,640
so he runs like a gymnast,
out the front door, gone.

231
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:40,640
And I run!
I run after him into the street,

232
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:43,600
then I hear this click.
It's the door closing behind me,

233
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:47,480
locked, and I'm standing there
absolutely naked!

234
00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:50,040
My God, no way. Yeah. I'm standing
in the middle of the street

235
00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:51,480
stark bollock naked.

236
00:14:51,520 --> 00:14:53,400
I had to rescue him. Yeah.

237
00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:55,000
Did that really happen?

238
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:02,880
All hanging out, for all the world
to see. Cop a load of this.

239
00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:10,920
But that's it, because Trump is
fixing the courts so he can stay

240
00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:13,800
for a third term. Why not a fourth?

241
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:17,160
Cos you know what this is?
The dark age.

242
00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:22,440
It's a new dark age.
If I live for 30 more years,

243
00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:25,600
I will die before the dark age ends.

244
00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:28,040
This is it, now. For life.

245
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:31,800
Oh, I've missed all this.
Stephanie Soothsayer.

246
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:34,960
It's a little bit...doom scrolling,
don't you think?

247
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:38,040
Maggie, you can't seriously say
these are good times, can you?

248
00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:41,160
Oh, hardly, no, but I think we're
in a state of panic.

249
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:42,960
I don't think it helps.

250
00:15:44,440 --> 00:15:46,400
I panic, apparently.
That's not what she means.

251
00:15:46,440 --> 00:15:48,440
I just think...

252
00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:52,240
We can all worry but we need to
do something.

253
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,560
So, we are.

254
00:15:57,960 --> 00:16:00,960
Just sort of a little bit of good
in the world, yeah?

255
00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:05,760
Yeah. That's what we wanted
to say. It's not a big deal,

256
00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:08,920
we just didn't want you
to hear it second-hand.

257
00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:11,280
We are going to foster.

258
00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:15,720
We did the panel on Monday
and they've said yes,

259
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,120
so gonna be foster parents.

260
00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:21,440
Oh! I think that's brilliant.

261
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:23,240
Well done.

262
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:28,160
Nice. That's amazing. Big changes.

263
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:31,560
There's such a shortage.
I mean, there is SUCH a shortage.

264
00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:32,680
Although...

265
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:36,480
..poor kids having to listen
to you two.

266
00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,600
We're terrified.

267
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,480
And we did try, but I'm 45 now,

268
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:45,240
and that's not gonna happen.

269
00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:47,920
And this is the next best thing.
It's equally good.

270
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:51,160
Yes, it's... Exactly. Sorry.

271
00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:54,400
Mum and Dad,

272
00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:56,800
here's to you.

273
00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:59,760
Congratulations.
We need people like you.

274
00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:03,440
You get a lot of money.

275
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:06,240
That's why we're doing it.
Cold, hard cash. It's the only...

276
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:09,320
It's just you never said,
when we were together.

277
00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:11,440
You never said you wanted kids.

278
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:13,280
I didn't back then.

279
00:17:13,320 --> 00:17:16,440
What changed? Nothing.
I suppose I was a different person.

280
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:18,600
Oh, now you're better?

281
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:19,880
No.

282
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:22,560
Don't.

283
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:31,920
Right, are we all done? We've got
a lovely tiramisu. All good?

284
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:33,560
I'll give you a hand.

285
00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:47,120
Look, come here.

286
00:17:57,320 --> 00:17:59,360
Daddy.

287
00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:03,560
Might be a complete nightmare.
I might regret every single second.

288
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:06,120
You can't fuck up their lives,
you know. Children.

289
00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:10,760
Cos they'll have had
a hard enough time already.

290
00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:13,000
They don't need to come into
a house that's...

291
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:16,280
..austere.

292
00:18:17,440 --> 00:18:19,480
Oh, that's what I am, is it?

293
00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:21,640
Well, I was always
the one who was a laugh.

294
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:24,960
I mean, sorry, but our mates did not
come round for a hoot with Curtis.

295
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,920
Oh, yeah, you're so funny.
I'm laughing. It's just

296
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:29,920
that you never said anything, ever,
about kids.

297
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:32,360
Jamie adopted, you
never said a word, not a hint.

298
00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:35,520
It's like I never knew you.

299
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:37,840
Except, well, hm-hm,

300
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:39,680
I didn't, did I?

301
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:46,520
You know what's really stupid?
Since you left.

302
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:49,120
Eating on my own.

303
00:18:50,360 --> 00:18:53,560
Sitting there, cut it up
into little pieces, I eat,

304
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:57,880
I put down the fork, I wash up.
Just all that ceremony. OK.

305
00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:01,040
And then I shit. I shit and I eat.

306
00:19:01,080 --> 00:19:03,400
Might as well be a tube.
That's my life.

307
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,040
I'm a tube.

308
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:06,960
Do you still have your key?
Have I what?

309
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,040
Your key to the house,
have you still got it?

310
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:12,280
Er, I-I-I don't know, maybe.
I didn't formally hand it over.

311
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:14,760
Why? Would you like me to?
No, it's just, like...

312
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:21,720
..you haven't been back,
have you? To the house?

313
00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:25,400
It's just things keep moving.

314
00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:29,040
When I'm not looking.
It's... I feel like I'm going mad.

315
00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:32,400
I come back home and it's like
things have been moved.

316
00:19:33,640 --> 00:19:35,400
Like a glass...

317
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:37,320
..or a bottle...

318
00:19:37,360 --> 00:19:40,920
..a letter, or a book
that's the wrong way round.

319
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:45,600
Or a little bit less wine.

320
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:49,000
And then I turn on the TV. You know
when you turn on the TV,

321
00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,040
it goes to the last channel
you were on?

322
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:55,640
When I turn it on, it goes to
channel 161. What the hell is 161?

323
00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:59,040
You OK?

324
00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:02,880
Yeah.

325
00:20:02,920 --> 00:20:04,240
It's not me.

326
00:20:05,360 --> 00:20:08,680
No, I didn't...
I didn't think it was.

327
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:11,600
I don't really think there's anyone
in your house.

328
00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:15,000
No.

329
00:20:18,120 --> 00:20:19,520
I've gone.

330
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:23,560
Yeah.

331
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:26,920
I've left you, darling. I've gone.

332
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:47,200
You OK? Yeah.

333
00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,200
Yeah, yeah.

334
00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:58,840
I'm fine.

335
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:03,200
No, no, no, wait. The best bit,
I'll tell you the best bit.

336
00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:06,080
Maggie, sob story, barren Maggie.

337
00:21:06,120 --> 00:21:10,000
When she said,
"Did that really happen?"

338
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,640
Oh, my God, yeah,
how to kill a fucking story.

339
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:15,640
"Did that really happen?"
Oh, "Hardly."

340
00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:17,600
"Hardly." She said that.

341
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:21,960
"Ooh, hardly." Downton Abbey.
"Hardly."

342
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:25,440
Ah, that's why she snared him.
To be a mother,

343
00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:29,040
that's what she wanted
all this time. I said so.

344
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:30,920
Do you know what I'm going to
do tonight?

345
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,080
I'm gonna get laid.

346
00:21:33,120 --> 00:21:35,480
I'm gonna get fucked
and battered and rimmed.

347
00:21:35,520 --> 00:21:37,680
I am so gonna get rimmed.

348
00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:40,920
Did you know that Curtis has never
eaten arse his entire life?

349
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:42,400
Yup, you did tell me.

350
00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:44,520
He'd only eat it
with some coriander.

351
00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:46,840
But tonight's the night!

352
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:50,640
All right, my darling. Goodnight.

353
00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:53,080
Bend over and think of Scotland.

354
00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:57,920
Oh, don't worry,
I've only had two beers,

355
00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:01,040
so I won't turn up hung over.
This is Leo, my gay neighbour.

356
00:22:01,080 --> 00:22:02,920
Oh, if that's not offensive.

357
00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:05,200
Well, it is. So watch it.

358
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:09,360
Don't talk to your employer
like that.

359
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:23,000
You little fuckers.
Big fuckers. Hot, hairy, hung.

360
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:32,640
Yes.

361
00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:55,320
Found you. Hello, I'm Dave.

362
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:57,120
I know it says Francesco on the app,

363
00:22:57,160 --> 00:23:02,720
but Francesco gets more results,
so, anyway, it's Dave really.

364
00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:04,240
Yeah, hi, I'm Leo.

365
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:06,840
And that's your real name? Yes.
Good start.

366
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:08,760
There's a lot of liars
on that thing.

367
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:17,200
Ooh, nice place. Thanks.

368
00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:18,960
Do you own it? I do, yeah.

369
00:23:21,440 --> 00:23:24,320
It's nice. And is it just you?

370
00:23:24,360 --> 00:23:30,440
Just me. And that is how it's gonna
stay, I'm afraid. Just me.

371
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:31,880
Um...

372
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:34,600
I'm fine with being on my own.

373
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:37,600
I didn't come round to marry you.

374
00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:38,960
No, but...

375
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,000
..I've changed my mind.

376
00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:47,280
I'm just not up for it tonight.
I thought I was, but I'm not.

377
00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:48,640
You know when it just goes?

378
00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:51,760
You're kidding me? Sorry.

379
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,080
Another one.

380
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:02,800
You know, I came all this way.

381
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:05,720
Well, 662 metres. Not that far.

382
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:07,040
Piss off.

383
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:09,480
I will.

384
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:24,080
Oh.

385
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:32,400
Oh, fuck.

386
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:30,800
I don't blame him, your own friends
treat you like shit.

387
00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:32,080
Yeah, you'd know.

388
00:25:32,120 --> 00:25:35,480
They might as well piss on
the floor. I'll get them a trough!

389
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:08,400
Apostrophe.

390
00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:31,440
I want to know why you would look at
something so disgusting.

391
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:18,240
Fuck you.

392
00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:20,640
Fuck off, then. Fuck off, kid.

393
00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:22,480
All right?

394
00:30:57,600 --> 00:30:59,320
I love you.

395
00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:00,720
I love you.

396
00:31:03,120 --> 00:31:04,720
I still love you.

397
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:48,720
Oh, no.

398
00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:13,360
George, I swear, if you tell
your girl friends about this,

399
00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:16,160
they will tell you that every single
stupid boy does this,

400
00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:17,680
and you'll laugh about it.

401
00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:21,400
Because there's such
a big world out there,

402
00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:25,120
and you can have boyfriends or
girlfriends or...whatever you like.

403
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:29,880
You can have all the wild
and crazy hot sex you want,

404
00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:31,400
night after night.

405
00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:37,320
Cos I promise you, George, there's
a great big gay life

406
00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:39,040
just waiting for you.

407
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:51,120
I'm coming in, so hands by your
sides, all right?

408
00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,040
Listen, all this stuff between
your mum and me,

409
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:56,520
I don't want you hearing that,
you know, so, er...

410
00:33:58,840 --> 00:33:59,920
There you go.

411
00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:06,320
You all right? Yeah.
Well, you don't look it.

412
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:11,440
What is it?
It's the game. Dog died.

413
00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:15,240
Who are you texting?
What's it to you?

414
00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:16,600
Oh, come on.
It's late, isn't it?

415
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:18,160
You've got college tomorrow
and you know the rules.

416
00:34:18,200 --> 00:34:20,240
The phone's not private
until you're 18.

417
00:34:20,280 --> 00:34:21,440
So, come on, give us it.

418
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:26,920
Is it a girl? Shut up.
No, has she upset you?

419
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:28,280
Can you just leave me alone?

420
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:30,520
I wanna tell you
something important, all right?

421
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:32,080
They're not worth it.

422
00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:34,960
Not one of them.

423
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:51,440
Urgh, you're disgusting.

424
00:35:26,720 --> 00:35:29,480
Morning, all. Morning!
Morning, lover boy. How's Curtis?

425
00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:34,080
Oh, boring old bastard. Hello, Saul.
All right, boss. Nice gaff.

426
00:35:34,120 --> 00:35:36,040
You're late.

427
00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:39,800
No. I was in early yesterday
because of you.

428
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:43,480
This is, like, a normal time of day,
because I work late.

429
00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:44,880
And...

430
00:35:44,920 --> 00:35:46,920
..I want to apologise.

431
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:50,240
If I was a bit rude last night.
I, er... Sorry about that.

432
00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:51,400
I meant no offence.

433
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:53,360
Why, what did you say?

434
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:54,760
It's all done and dusted.

435
00:35:56,720 --> 00:35:57,800
So, are we good?

436
00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:00,000
Told you,
got nothing on my conscience.

437
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:02,640
I only had two pints,
so my head is clear.

438
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,680
Not me. I'm fucking hanging.

439
00:36:05,720 --> 00:36:08,160
I'll tell you what, boss.
I said to Jude,

440
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:10,160
"Have you got any paint left
from when you last did the walls?"

441
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:12,520
She looked in the cellar. And there
it was, sitting at the back,

442
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:14,640
after all these years. No-one ever
chucks paint away.

443
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:16,080
Don't know how to do it.

444
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:18,360
That saves a bit of money.
Nicely played.

445
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:21,120
Well, welcome on board, Saul.
All right,

446
00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:23,080
me and Judy have got
the managers' meeting now,

447
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:25,720
all the bars and clubs
with the council. It's a riot.

448
00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:29,440
Help yourself to anything, and Mikey
can look after you. Mikey,

449
00:36:29,480 --> 00:36:33,440
you've met Clive. That's Saul,
Clive's son. All right?

450
00:36:33,480 --> 00:36:34,760
Morning, fellas.

451
00:37:04,080 --> 00:37:07,840
It's Saul, isn't it?
I mean, you're Hotsaul.

452
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:11,520
Oh, mate, don't tell me you
subscribe. It's for girls, you know.

453
00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:13,600
Can't stop me.
As long as you're paying.

454
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:15,080
I'm on there. Are you?

455
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:17,600
Mikey Manchester.
How much do you make?

456
00:37:17,640 --> 00:37:19,240
20,000 a year.

457
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:22,560
Fucking hell. I make six if I'm
lucky. What you working here for?

458
00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:25,760
My dad. He's a...dickhead.

459
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:28,000
Left us with a load of debts
and shit.

460
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:30,080
But hey, if you ever wanna collab...

461
00:37:30,120 --> 00:37:31,680
Oh, mate, not my scene.

462
00:37:31,720 --> 00:37:33,200
I could teach you.

463
00:37:33,240 --> 00:37:34,880
Seriously, just women. Yeah?

464
00:37:34,920 --> 00:37:36,120
Take a Viagra.

465
00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:39,520
Nice try, cheers, mate.
Keep subscribing. Have a good wank.

466
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:40,800
I've done that.

467
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:47,000
I am catnip in this place.

468
00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:51,000
What do you mean? That Mikey lad,
asking to diddle me. Begging for it.

469
00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:53,200
So, what did you say?

470
00:37:53,240 --> 00:37:56,800
I said, "Up your arse." That was
a mistake. He said, "Yes, please."

471
00:37:59,880 --> 00:38:01,360
And who is she?

472
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:02,960
I'm Saul. I'm with him.

473
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:06,000
Well, isn't he the lucky one?

474
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:08,720
Told you. Catnip.

475
00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:16,160
And who are you?

476
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:17,840
I'm the electrician.

477
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:20,240
Oh, the neighbour. That's right.

478
00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,400
The horny-handed son of toil.

479
00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:28,400
You're the one with the son.
Mm. He said he was hot.

480
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:30,480
Who did?

481
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:32,000
Leo.

482
00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:34,920
When did he say that?

483
00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:38,080
Wasn't he naked, your boy?

484
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:41,120
Wasn't there a story
that Leo was in your house,

485
00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:43,200
and your son was naked?

486
00:38:43,240 --> 00:38:44,680
Yeah.

487
00:38:44,720 --> 00:38:47,240
When the boss got locked out
the house. He means Saul.

488
00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:49,720
Yeah, well he doesn't mean
George, does he? George is 16.

489
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:50,880
He's legal.

490
00:38:50,920 --> 00:38:54,480
Melba, it's a bit dangerous in here
with the electrics.

491
00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:56,640
Let's keep you safe, eh?
Sit you by the window.

492
00:38:56,680 --> 00:39:00,040
Hanna's actually nipping out
for some toasties if you want one.

493
00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:02,400
Let's get you a nice
cheese and ham toastie, eh?

494
00:39:05,880 --> 00:39:08,840
Next point of order,
Lauchlan McCartney.

495
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:10,600
You'll be glad to hear he's
currently residing

496
00:39:10,640 --> 00:39:12,680
at His Majesty's pleasure.
Which one's he?

497
00:39:12,720 --> 00:39:15,880
The Bird Man. Big tall skinhead,
you've seen him.

498
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:18,440
He'd bite the heads off pigeons
and leave 'em outside Cruz 101.

499
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:21,600
Oh, yeah. Not any more.
Pigeon population is restored.

500
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,080
Next on the list,
over to you, Lucille.

501
00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:26,960
This was tough. Miss Titty Ditty.

502
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:30,000
Titty Ditty is a cabaret artist
from Glasgow.

503
00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:33,000
We booked her, but she then
prints posters

504
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:34,920
and starts advertising
on her website,

505
00:39:34,960 --> 00:39:36,640
this is her, not us,

506
00:39:36,680 --> 00:39:39,440
and the image had
a Star of David on it.

507
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:42,160
Now, it's got all sorts on it.
It's got Spider-Man,

508
00:39:42,200 --> 00:39:45,520
it's got the TARDIS,
it's got Cynthia Erivo.

509
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:47,680
It's a collage, but we get protests.

510
00:39:47,720 --> 00:39:49,800
They think she's anti-Palestine.

511
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:52,680
And is she? I don't think she could
point to Palestine on a map.

512
00:39:52,720 --> 00:39:55,320
She sings limericks on a banjo.
The next thing you know,

513
00:39:55,360 --> 00:39:56,600
our staff are being assaulted,

514
00:39:56,640 --> 00:39:58,400
security, they're getting food
flung at them,

515
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:00,000
chips and stuff
thrown in their face.

516
00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:01,440
Who does that? Passers-by?

517
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:03,280
No, our lot.

518
00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:07,360
Lesbians at a lesbian bar
attacking the lesbian staff

519
00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:10,760
because of a lesbian with a Jewish
symbol. What the hell's going on?

520
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:16,120
On behalf of the council,
I've got to say, we're very happy.

521
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:19,480
We can review the use
of polycarbonates after 11pm,

522
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:22,400
but I do have one worry.

523
00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:24,680
You have a lot of drag queens
on the door.

524
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:28,600
We do. Are you sure?

525
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:32,080
We definitely do. I've seen them.

526
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:34,120
Are you sure about the policy?

527
00:40:34,160 --> 00:40:36,200
We think it might drive
people away.

528
00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:38,360
I think they draw people in.
In fact, I know they do.

529
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:39,840
People love a drag queen.

530
00:40:39,880 --> 00:40:42,400
In 2026? Since time immemorial.

531
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:44,280
I don't quite understand what
the problem is here.

532
00:40:44,320 --> 00:40:46,720
I'm gay. I go to Canal Street.

533
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:49,640
I discover that gay means
a man in lipstick

534
00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:51,920
and a wig with false breasts
and glitter.

535
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:53,280
How does that represent me?

536
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:55,120
It's not meant to represent you.

537
00:40:55,160 --> 00:40:58,440
No, but nothing ever represents me,
does it? So, what do you want?

538
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:00,640
Door staff in...

539
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:04,160
What?

540
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:08,880
He's not even gay. He's been seen
with a woman called Elaine.

541
00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:10,960
He just pretends to be gay
to get promoted.

542
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:13,320
That's how it works these days.

543
00:41:13,360 --> 00:41:17,400
Ah, I always said the left would eat
itself, and the feasting has begun.

544
00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:21,040
They're throwing chips.
With tomato fucking sauce.

545
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:23,160
Do you still have that youth group?

546
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:24,840
Er, yeah, still going.

547
00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:28,840
I've got a youth for you.
Let me save one of them. Just one.

548
00:41:28,880 --> 00:41:30,960
Ah, that's what I like to see.

549
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:33,320
At least I can trust you lot.
Morning, Melba.

550
00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:36,880
My meeting was dull,
stupid and insane.

551
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:39,600
Hello, Clive. All good?
Saul, happy?

552
00:41:39,640 --> 00:41:42,360
All good. Oh, and Benny
from the brewery.

553
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:45,280
On cue.
A warm hand on your entrance.

554
00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:48,200
You wish. Christ,
I've had a night and a half.

555
00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:51,400
Hello, Leonardo. Hand those out.
Special offers,

556
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:53,440
Love Your Best Friend Day
on the 31st. What?

557
00:41:53,480 --> 00:41:55,520
I know, I don't know who comes up
with this shit, me.

558
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:56,960
Someone in a room.

559
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:59,880
So, I went out last night, hooked up
with this ice skater. He said,

560
00:41:59,920 --> 00:42:02,040
"I'm with Disney on Ice."
I said, "Well, better than being

561
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,400
"with Disney on fire."
No word of a lie,

562
00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:06,600
grabbed his arse,
it was like holding a skull.

563
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:09,120
Ooh, nice. I know. And hung
like a deodorant.

564
00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:12,120
Like a lady-size roll-on?
Fuck your mother.

565
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:14,520
I'm talking a cannister
of Right Guard. Huh?

566
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:16,600
You should see me, girls,
I'm prolapsed.

567
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:19,400
And he shot his load.
Do you know how many ropes?

568
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:22,600
12. In the face. One,
ow, two, ow, three, ow, four, ow...

569
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:23,960
I was like a battered wife.

570
00:42:25,640 --> 00:42:27,560
Trying to work here.

571
00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:30,920
Don't you tell me
to put a plug in it, darling,

572
00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:32,560
cos I've already got one in.

573
00:42:32,600 --> 00:42:34,960
Benny from the brewery,
this is Clive.

574
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:36,480
We're having some electrics done.

575
00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:40,320
Oh. Are you putting
the neon back up? Oh, my God.

576
00:42:40,360 --> 00:42:42,080
That's a thought, I love the neon.

577
00:42:42,120 --> 00:42:44,760
I love the neon. Do you remember?

578
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:46,960
Ta-da!

579
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:49,240
See? Told you.

580
00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:53,640
Oh. Shit.

581
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:54,760
What happened to that thing?

582
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:57,240
Never bloody worked,
did it? And I got the blame for it.

583
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:03,960
Yeah, we should put it back up.

584
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:08,000
Curtis would be so pissed off.
Hey, Clive, can you fix neon signs?

585
00:43:08,040 --> 00:43:10,080
Cost you extra.
Where is it? It's not here.

586
00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:12,920
Oh, no, it's at home, it's at mine.
I got it in the divorce.

587
00:43:12,960 --> 00:43:15,600
It's a big old thing. Clive, could
you bring it in your van tomorrow?

588
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:17,800
No, I told you, it's a one-day job,
innit?

589
00:43:17,840 --> 00:43:20,000
And anyway, I think I'm finished
with this place.

590
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:21,760
Well, I'm still paying you.

591
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:26,240
All right, yeah. I'll go and get it.
Where is it? Your house? Um...

592
00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:27,640
I've got the keys, haven't I?

593
00:43:27,680 --> 00:43:29,960
No, but I don't like anyone
going into my house without me.

594
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:32,160
Why not? What am I gonna do?
I just don't.

595
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:34,960
Well, maybe you should come
with me, eh? Cos I wanna talk to you

596
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:39,000
about inappropriate behaviour.
Your staff making suggestions

597
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:42,000
to my son.
Oh, shut up, Dad. Don't be stupid.

598
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:45,280
What did you do?
Didn't do anything.

599
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:47,520
Ooh, drama, salt my popcorn.

600
00:43:50,120 --> 00:43:52,720
He asked him for sex, and I know the
law. That's inappropriate.

601
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:55,600
All right, all right, I'll have
a word, but come on, Clive.

602
00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:58,880
They're lads. They banter.
Wasn't it just banter?

603
00:43:58,920 --> 00:44:01,760
Saul's 25 years old.
Exactly, he's not a kid.

604
00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:05,120
Yeah, and he's not bent.
Oh, so that's the problem.

605
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,880
I did not make a pass at him.
You're kidding me.

606
00:44:07,920 --> 00:44:09,400
What, I'm not seriously
getting bollocked?

607
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:12,120
It's people your age who insist
on these rules,

608
00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:15,160
for good reason.
And I think this is private, Zee.

609
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:17,000
I saw them. Saul was laughing.

610
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:19,600
Why is everything always sex
with you lot, eh? All the time.

611
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:21,560
And it's not like that with you?
Come on, Clive.

612
00:44:21,600 --> 00:44:22,920
Take me to one
of your building sites.

613
00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:25,280
Let me listen to your mates.
I'd be shocked.

614
00:44:25,320 --> 00:44:27,920
"Fuck your mother," that man said.
I mean, "Fuck your mother"?!

615
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:29,040
Who says that?

616
00:44:29,080 --> 00:44:32,640
I was being professional.
This IS my profession.

617
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:36,160
We're both on Only Fans.
Look, and there's Saul...

618
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:39,680
..selling himself here.
Have it on the group chat.

619
00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:51,320
Anything good?

620
00:44:51,360 --> 00:44:54,320
That person with the lipstick said
that you fancied Saul.

621
00:44:54,360 --> 00:44:55,440
I mean, how old are you, Leo?

622
00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:57,240
Clive, look,
he's 6'5" and strapping.

623
00:44:57,280 --> 00:44:58,880
I'm allowed to notice.

624
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:01,520
If-If you had a mate
who had a daughter who was 25

625
00:45:01,560 --> 00:45:03,560
and gorgeous, you'd notice, so...

626
00:45:03,600 --> 00:45:06,360
It's not my fault that Saul is...

627
00:45:06,400 --> 00:45:07,680
We've got rules about this.

628
00:45:07,720 --> 00:45:09,800
Saul's an employee.
You can't play that.

629
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:31,200
What? What's so funny?
No, it's nothing, it's nothing.

630
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:33,960
Nothing, really.

631
00:45:37,560 --> 00:45:39,480
You're laughing,
aren't you? Just all of ya.

632
00:45:39,520 --> 00:45:41,840
You're laughing at filth.
It's just filth.

633
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:44,480
Deodorants?
And you wonder why you get hate.

634
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:46,760
All right, you can hate us
and blame us all you like,

635
00:45:46,800 --> 00:45:48,720
but why don't you sit down
with your son, huh?

636
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:50,800
Your straight son, and ask him?

637
00:46:27,080 --> 00:46:30,880
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