1 00:00:01,500 --> 00:00:06,500 2 00:00:07,500 --> 00:00:12,500 3 00:00:12,382 --> 00:00:14,906 We're going to ask you a series of questions. 4 00:00:14,906 --> 00:00:17,169 Some will be basic, biographical questions. 5 00:00:17,169 --> 00:00:20,042 Others will be very personal about your sexual history. 6 00:00:20,042 --> 00:00:22,523 That being said, let's start with telling us... 7 00:00:22,523 --> 00:00:24,612 When you lost your virginity. 8 00:00:24,612 --> 00:00:27,615 december 5, 1994. 9 00:00:27,615 --> 00:00:30,313 It was my senior year of high school, 10 00:00:30,313 --> 00:00:33,577 and i lost it to Danny Rizzo. 11 00:00:33,577 --> 00:00:35,884 My parents had gone away for the weekend, 12 00:00:35,884 --> 00:00:39,191 and we each did about eight shots of vodka... 13 00:00:39,191 --> 00:00:41,498 and then we did it. 14 00:00:41,498 --> 00:00:44,762 then we threw up about ten minutes after that, so-- 15 00:00:44,762 --> 00:00:48,200 First time i had sex, i was actually pretty young-- fifteen. 16 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:51,726 and she was a freshman in college. and it just kinda happened. 17 00:00:51,726 --> 00:00:56,034 I was hanging out with friends in the parking lot of the aandp drinking some beers. 18 00:00:56,034 --> 00:00:59,472 She pulled into the parking lot in her dad's new Cadillac. 19 00:00:59,472 --> 00:01:01,997 We got to talkin', and the next thing i know, 20 00:01:01,997 --> 00:01:04,826 We're in the backseat kinda goin' at it, so-- 21 00:01:04,826 --> 00:01:07,785 It was pretty cool 'cause i had never been in a Cadillac before. 22 00:01:07,785 --> 00:01:11,615 I was a late bloomer. It was my junior year of college. 23 00:01:11,615 --> 00:01:15,880 and i lost it to the woman i eventually married, Maria. 24 00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:21,582 So, i really only had sex with one woman up until that point, 25 00:01:21,582 --> 00:01:24,541 and that's probably why i got divorced. 26 00:01:24,541 --> 00:01:26,804 I was only 16, 27 00:01:26,804 --> 00:01:29,328 and he was much older. 28 00:01:29,328 --> 00:01:33,332 He worked with my mother. My parents got divorced when i was nine. 29 00:01:33,332 --> 00:01:37,423 and he used to come to the house for dinners and parties and things. 30 00:01:37,423 --> 00:01:41,079 but then he started coming over when he knew my mom wouldn't be home. 31 00:01:41,079 --> 00:01:45,649 and then one thing kinda led to another. 32 00:01:45,649 --> 00:01:47,738 and before i even knew what was happening, 33 00:01:47,738 --> 00:01:50,611 i was having my first affair with a married man. 34 00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:53,178 When i first had sex? My dad drove me down... 35 00:01:53,178 --> 00:01:56,442 from our apartment in the Bronx where we lived. 36 00:01:56,442 --> 00:02:00,142 He took me down to the upper east side to some high-class whorehouse. 37 00:02:02,144 --> 00:02:05,669 and she said her name was Cherry Pie. 38 00:02:05,669 --> 00:02:07,715 I always liked that name-- Cherry Pie. 39 00:02:07,715 --> 00:02:11,675 Let's just say I have a very clear image of her in my mental file. 40 00:02:11,675 --> 00:02:15,200 He was the sweetest guy in the world. We went to high school together. 41 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:18,987 and we both wanted to wait until we got married 'cause it was that catholic thing. 42 00:02:18,987 --> 00:02:22,033 But i wanted to do it before my 18th birthday. 43 00:02:22,033 --> 00:02:24,688 So we went to this bed-and-breakfast in Saratoga, 44 00:02:24,688 --> 00:02:30,215 and we just made love for three straight days. 45 00:02:30,215 --> 00:02:33,958 And then we went off to college and promised to be faithful to each other. 46 00:02:33,958 --> 00:02:35,960 And then what happened? 47 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,528 Well, I was faithful for the first semester. 48 00:02:38,528 --> 00:02:42,706 And he came back after christmas break and told me he was gay. 49 00:02:42,706 --> 00:02:45,404 So i guess he was a little sweeter than i would've liked. 50 00:02:45,404 --> 00:02:48,146 Okay, wait a second, Sue. I mean, this is unbel-- 51 00:02:48,146 --> 00:02:49,800 I mean-- I mean, come on! 52 00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:52,281 I don't even understand where this came from. 53 00:02:52,281 --> 00:02:56,285 How long have you been thinking about this? You just drop this on me all of a sudden today? 54 00:02:56,285 --> 00:02:59,767 I mean, I don't even know-- stop! You're stuttering. Okay? 55 00:02:59,767 --> 00:03:02,291 It's over! It's simple! Pack your shit. Get out by the weekend. 56 00:03:02,291 --> 00:03:07,122 Seriously, this is like-- this is like a shock to me. 57 00:03:07,122 --> 00:03:10,734 Look, I don't know what else you want me to say. It's simple, it's not brain surgery. It's over. 58 00:03:10,734 --> 00:03:12,780 - I want you to have your shit out by the weekend. - You gotta be kidding me! 59 00:03:12,780 --> 00:03:15,260 - I'm not kidding you. - When did this come about? 60 00:03:15,260 --> 00:03:17,785 Oh, my god, gimme a break. You know this was inevitable. 61 00:03:17,785 --> 00:03:21,571 Look, if i thought this was inevitable, I wouldn’t have given up my apartment 6 months ago, would I? 62 00:03:21,571 --> 00:03:24,792 Oh, no, no, no, don't you pin that on me. I didn't ask you to give up your apartment. 63 00:03:24,792 --> 00:03:27,795 No, but you did ask me to move in with you, right? That I didn't fuckin' imagine. Did I? 64 00:03:27,795 --> 00:03:31,755 - What do you want me to say to you? - You know what I'de like? How about a fuckin' explanation? 65 00:03:31,755 --> 00:03:34,758 Why do you need an explanation? 66 00:03:34,758 --> 00:03:37,761 - Why can't you just see the writing on the wall? - Why can't I see the writing on the wall? 67 00:03:37,761 --> 00:03:41,286 Because the only thing i can see is this ugly freakin' painting that cost me a few grand. 68 00:03:41,286 --> 00:03:43,549 you want the painting? you can have the painting. 69 00:03:43,549 --> 00:03:45,813 Look, I don't want the painting. What are you talking' about I got you the painting. 70 00:03:45,813 --> 00:03:48,772 - I don't want it - Then what do you want from me? 71 00:03:48,772 --> 00:03:51,775 You know what I want? I just want you to talk to me. 72 00:03:51,775 --> 00:03:55,213 Just tell me why you're doin' this? 73 00:03:55,213 --> 00:03:59,217 Where you goin'? Tell me why you're doing this! This is comin' out of left field here! 74 00:03:59,217 --> 00:04:02,090 Do you want kids? 75 00:04:02,090 --> 00:04:04,657 Yeah! You know I want kids. We've already discussed this. 76 00:04:04,657 --> 00:04:06,921 When? 77 00:04:06,921 --> 00:04:08,879 As soon as you're ready. 78 00:04:08,879 --> 00:04:11,882 Guess what. Not ready. 79 00:04:11,882 --> 00:04:16,191 You ever notice how whenever you bring up kids, I change the subject? 80 00:04:16,191 --> 00:04:18,889 I don't want them... Ever! 81 00:04:18,889 --> 00:04:21,065 That was kinda harsh, you know, 82 00:04:21,065 --> 00:04:24,721 Because we were talkin', everything-- kids, marriage, the whole nine. 83 00:04:24,721 --> 00:04:27,202 Then she drops that on me out of the blue, so-- 84 00:04:27,202 --> 00:04:29,421 That was kinda tough. 85 00:04:29,421 --> 00:04:32,598 - I told you moving in with her was a big mistake, didn't I? - I know, I know. 86 00:04:32,598 --> 00:04:35,079 Tommy, you are not the settling down type of guy. 87 00:04:35,079 --> 00:04:38,822 You're the type of guy that has to be out there every day makin' it happen. 88 00:04:38,822 --> 00:04:40,911 Forget about that wife and kids crap! 89 00:04:40,911 --> 00:04:44,306 What is that with you anyway? You take it from somebody who's been there. 90 00:04:44,306 --> 00:04:48,527 A wife and children will drive you to an early grave! 91 00:04:48,527 --> 00:04:52,488 Take a look at me, for example Tommy. Tommy Take a look at me, baby! 92 00:04:52,488 --> 00:04:54,316 - You're an animal. - I'm an animal ! 93 00:04:54,316 --> 00:04:57,710 I am twice as vital as any married man half my age. 94 00:04:57,710 --> 00:05:00,278 - Ain't that right, sweetheart? - So you keep telling me. 95 00:05:00,278 --> 00:05:03,542 Tell the kid how many women i've porked. 96 00:05:03,542 --> 00:05:07,068 Enough to definitely make every woman sick to her stomach. 97 00:05:07,068 --> 00:05:09,548 - How many? come on. - Five hundred. 98 00:05:09,548 --> 00:05:11,942 I have had sex with 500 different women, 99 00:05:11,942 --> 00:05:15,032 and I left them all baying at the moon. 100 00:05:15,032 --> 00:05:18,557 You stick with me, kid, you could wind up with twice that many. 101 00:05:18,557 --> 00:05:21,604 - So what was the fight about? - I don't know. 102 00:05:21,604 --> 00:05:24,781 I came home from work, everything seems fine, she's having a sandwich. 103 00:05:24,781 --> 00:05:28,002 The next thing I know, she's screaming at me, kicks me out of the apartment. 104 00:05:28,002 --> 00:05:31,527 - She kicked you out? - It was her place. 105 00:05:31,527 --> 00:05:34,617 Tommy, she kicked you out? that's unbelievable. 106 00:05:34,617 --> 00:05:37,838 In my day, I would've thrown her big ass right out the door. 107 00:05:40,144 --> 00:05:43,060 So, what do you need? a place to stay for a couple weeks? 108 00:05:43,060 --> 00:05:45,367 huh? 109 00:05:45,367 --> 00:05:49,588 I can't ask you to do that. I'll get a sublet until I find a new apartment. 110 00:05:49,588 --> 00:05:51,721 Why don't you go live in a box in an alley? 111 00:05:51,721 --> 00:05:54,637 As long as i'm breathing, you've got a place to stay. 112 00:05:54,637 --> 00:05:56,900 Stay with me a couple weeks, I'll get your head all straightened out. 113 00:05:56,900 --> 00:06:00,861 We'll put that romantic idealism crap to bed once and for all. 114 00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:04,038 But for now, Tommy, I want you to do yourself a favor. 115 00:06:04,038 --> 00:06:06,823 I want you to go out and try to get laid. 116 00:06:06,823 --> 00:06:10,783 Because nothing heals a broken heart like a brand-new piece of booty. 117 00:06:10,783 --> 00:06:14,831 Don't listen to him, please. 118 00:06:14,831 --> 00:06:17,747 - The eyes. - Yeah, i see the eyes. 119 00:06:17,747 --> 00:06:19,749 My name's Tommy Reilly. 120 00:06:19,749 --> 00:06:22,360 I'm 32 years old. from Queens originally. 121 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,667 Are you afraid of getting hurt in a relationship? 122 00:06:24,667 --> 00:06:28,584 No, you know? I think, uh, it's better to just go for it, right? 123 00:06:28,584 --> 00:06:33,023 What are you gonna do? live your life in fear, uh, of gettin' a broken heart? 124 00:06:33,023 --> 00:06:36,070 It's the price you gotta pay to potentially be happy. 125 00:06:48,125 --> 00:06:50,127 You said it's over here? 126 00:06:50,127 --> 00:06:54,131 - Are you gonna rent that? - Yeah, yeah. 127 00:06:54,131 --> 00:06:58,440 - Definitely? - Yeah, definitely. Why? 128 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:02,052 I just wondering maybe you still hadn't made up your mind between the two. 129 00:07:02,052 --> 00:07:04,620 - Just holding it in your hands. - Uh, no. 130 00:07:04,620 --> 00:07:08,232 I'm definitely gonna rent this one. I'll give you-- you want this one? 131 00:07:08,232 --> 00:07:11,453 No. I came for that one. It's a great movie. 132 00:07:11,453 --> 00:07:13,194 That's what I heard. 133 00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:16,980 I'll just keep looking. 134 00:07:16,980 --> 00:07:18,895 Sorry. 135 00:07:33,692 --> 00:07:37,870 - Hey. - Oh, hey. How you doin'? 136 00:07:37,870 --> 00:07:41,962 Good. I was wondering. have you seen this? 137 00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:44,877 - Uh, no - It's really g-- it's very different. 138 00:07:44,877 --> 00:07:49,665 I would-- i'd love to help you out here, but I gotta watch this for work. 139 00:07:49,665 --> 00:07:54,278 Oh really. you sure-- they've got a great selection of other-- 140 00:07:54,278 --> 00:07:56,367 I know, but I gotta see this one. 141 00:07:56,367 --> 00:08:00,023 No? Okay. 142 00:08:00,023 --> 00:08:03,679 There's nothing I can do to change your mind then? 143 00:08:03,679 --> 00:08:06,029 No. Okay. 144 00:08:06,029 --> 00:08:08,945 - Well, I tried. - Yeah, yeah. 145 00:08:08,945 --> 00:08:12,253 - Enjoy your movie. It's a great movie. good night - All right. 146 00:08:12,253 --> 00:08:14,472 Uh, excuse me. 147 00:08:14,472 --> 00:08:17,693 Hey. how you doin'? Hi. 148 00:08:17,693 --> 00:08:21,740 I was thinking, if you want the video that badly, 149 00:08:21,740 --> 00:08:24,091 why don't you give me your phone number? 150 00:08:24,091 --> 00:08:28,443 When i finish watching it, I could give you a call and then maybe bring it over. 151 00:08:28,443 --> 00:08:30,923 No, I don't want to see it that badly. Thank you. 152 00:08:30,923 --> 00:08:33,752 Okay. 'cause it seemed like back there like there was some sort of emergency, 153 00:08:33,752 --> 00:08:36,799 - Like you need to see it tonight. - No. 154 00:08:36,799 --> 00:08:40,368 Now you got me feeling like i'm some kind of shit heel, you know? 155 00:08:40,368 --> 00:08:43,414 Like i should've given you the video. 156 00:08:43,414 --> 00:08:46,765 Like it would've been the gentlemanly thing to do. 157 00:08:46,765 --> 00:08:49,725 Well, it would've been, but you missed your opportunity. 158 00:08:49,725 --> 00:08:52,771 Then why don't you let me make it up to you? 159 00:08:52,771 --> 00:08:55,426 Why don't we go in here and get a cup of coffee? 160 00:08:55,426 --> 00:08:58,734 We can talk and-- 161 00:08:58,734 --> 00:09:00,736 am i coming on too strong? 162 00:09:00,736 --> 00:09:03,782 I just was thinking, we could get some coffee-- 163 00:09:03,782 --> 00:09:07,525 Okay, how about this? 164 00:09:07,525 --> 00:09:10,702 In exchange for the video now, i'll give you my phone number. 165 00:09:10,702 --> 00:09:14,054 And if you call me later this week, we'll do coffee then. 166 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:17,796 but how do i know that you'll, you know, give me the right number? 167 00:09:17,796 --> 00:09:19,798 We are making a deal here. 168 00:09:19,798 --> 00:09:21,713 You're either in or you're out. 169 00:09:24,499 --> 00:09:26,849 I'm in. 170 00:09:26,849 --> 00:09:30,722 Make sure you return it on time. I'd hate to pay a hefty late fee. 171 00:09:30,722 --> 00:09:32,855 You don't know his name, you don't know what he does for a living. 172 00:09:32,855 --> 00:09:36,467 You don't know where he lives. But you gave him your phone number! 173 00:09:36,467 --> 00:09:38,948 He seems like a nice enough guy. 174 00:09:38,948 --> 00:09:41,516 We just kinda skipped the personal stuff. 175 00:09:41,516 --> 00:09:43,953 You are supposed to start with the personal stuff. 176 00:09:43,953 --> 00:09:47,652 "where do you live? what do you do for a living?" Like a basic background check. 177 00:09:47,652 --> 00:09:50,786 what if this guy calls you? You don't know him from a hole in the wall! 178 00:09:50,786 --> 00:09:53,397 He could be a sexual deviant. I don't know, something! 179 00:09:53,397 --> 00:09:55,573 He was renting Breakfast at Tiffany's. 180 00:09:55,573 --> 00:09:59,577 That hardly seemed like the kind of movie the neighborhood perv would get off on. 181 00:09:59,577 --> 00:10:03,233 Breakfast at Tiffany's. Okay, well, he's gay. 182 00:10:03,233 --> 00:10:06,758 Did i ever tell you the ratio between single, straight, gainfully employed men... 183 00:10:06,758 --> 00:10:10,022 - And single straight women in this town. - Yes, many times. 184 00:10:10,022 --> 00:10:12,590 - I did, right? Okay. - Mm-hmm. 185 00:10:12,590 --> 00:10:15,332 So don't go get your panties in a bunch over this guy. 186 00:10:15,332 --> 00:10:18,379 I bet he'd rather redecorate your apartment than, you know-- 187 00:10:18,379 --> 00:10:22,905 - Than what? - Than take care of his manly obligations, that's what. 188 00:10:22,905 --> 00:10:26,256 My name is Maria Tedesco. and my age is none of your business. 189 00:10:26,256 --> 00:10:30,130 And I don't even think I should be doing this. 190 00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:33,655 All right. um-- i'm originally from staten island. 191 00:10:33,655 --> 00:10:37,049 Now i live in manhattan, which i hate. I'm a teacher. 192 00:10:37,049 --> 00:10:39,965 I'm here, ps-3. Sixth-graders here... 193 00:10:39,965 --> 00:10:42,968 Make more in weekly allowance than i do in a month. 194 00:10:42,968 --> 00:10:45,580 But, um, I love the little sons of bitches, 195 00:10:45,580 --> 00:10:47,973 so it makes it all kind of worth it. 196 00:10:58,593 --> 00:11:01,248 Maria, it's me, Benjamin. Can i talk to you? 197 00:11:01,248 --> 00:11:03,511 Ugh! I'm listening. 198 00:11:03,511 --> 00:11:06,166 I was in the neighborhood. I thought i'd come by and say hello. 199 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:09,908 This is a really bad habit you're developing, Benjamin. 200 00:11:09,908 --> 00:11:13,608 Yeah, but i-- you know, I-- I've been waiting to see you for a while. 201 00:11:13,608 --> 00:11:16,045 I thought maybe this time you'd let me in. 202 00:11:16,045 --> 00:11:19,179 I miss you very much. Let me in. we'll talk. 203 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,137 I promise I won't try anything. 204 00:11:21,137 --> 00:11:24,096 I promise, okay? Please? 205 00:11:28,318 --> 00:11:32,583 I'm Benjamin Basner. I'm 24 years old and I'm from Brooklyn. 206 00:11:32,583 --> 00:11:34,672 My sex life? 207 00:11:34,672 --> 00:11:37,588 At this point, it's nonexistent. - Hey, you suck! 208 00:11:39,460 --> 00:11:41,984 At this point, it's just totally, uh-- 209 00:11:44,291 --> 00:11:46,293 Should we start again? 210 00:11:46,293 --> 00:11:49,296 Why do you keep using the excuse you were in the neighborhood? - I was! 211 00:11:49,296 --> 00:11:51,515 You live three blocks away. You're always in the neighborhood. 212 00:11:51,515 --> 00:11:55,084 but I wrote you a song and I thought maybe you want to hear it. 213 00:11:55,084 --> 00:11:58,870 - No, 'cause I've heard enough of your songs already. - Don't say that. 214 00:11:58,870 --> 00:12:02,352 - I miss you very much. Is that so bad? - No, it's not bad. 215 00:12:02,352 --> 00:12:05,660 But the thing is, it's been over a year already. you need to get over it. - You don't understand. 216 00:12:05,660 --> 00:12:08,140 I can't get over it. I can't live without you. 217 00:12:08,140 --> 00:12:10,578 Really. I can't. 218 00:12:10,578 --> 00:12:12,797 I want you to look at me. Take a good look. 219 00:12:12,797 --> 00:12:16,192 I have gained 15 pounds since the divorce. 220 00:12:16,192 --> 00:12:18,673 - Fifteen. okay? - Yes. 221 00:12:18,673 --> 00:12:22,198 We should consider getting back together, if for no other reason than my health. 222 00:12:22,198 --> 00:12:24,418 Why the sudden change of heart after a year? 223 00:12:24,418 --> 00:12:27,595 I'm finally okay and you want to play with my emotions again? 224 00:12:27,595 --> 00:12:30,424 I'm not playing with anything. I just recently realized... 225 00:12:30,424 --> 00:12:33,688 - We had a beautiful marriage, and i was eating well. - what? 226 00:12:33,688 --> 00:12:38,040 and I -- I didn't have the foresight to see how great it was. 227 00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:40,869 What are you talking about? We fought all the time. We made each other miserable. 228 00:12:40,869 --> 00:12:44,742 We stopped having sex. you started cheating on me! What was so beautiful about that? 229 00:12:44,742 --> 00:12:48,485 We had some ups and downs, but we also had some very good times. 230 00:12:48,485 --> 00:12:50,835 - Name one. - You want me to name one? 231 00:12:50,835 --> 00:12:52,446 yes, yes. 232 00:12:52,446 --> 00:12:54,752 July 4 weekend in '97. 233 00:12:54,752 --> 00:12:57,320 That was nice, but they were few and far between. 234 00:12:57,320 --> 00:13:01,498 What about that time during my junior year in college when we went skiing? 235 00:13:01,498 --> 00:13:05,459 You mean the time when you twisted your ankle in the parking lot... 236 00:13:05,459 --> 00:13:08,505 Before we got to the mountain, and we had to spend the entire week in bed? 237 00:13:08,505 --> 00:13:10,812 Yeah, but we had a damn good time in that bed. 238 00:13:10,812 --> 00:13:13,554 My jaw is still a little sore, if you know what I mean. 239 00:13:13,554 --> 00:13:16,905 That was a really long time ago, Benjamin. 240 00:13:16,905 --> 00:13:19,690 It'd be nice to spend some time together again. 241 00:13:19,690 --> 00:13:22,650 - Let's get into bed and we'll talk - We'll talk? 242 00:13:22,650 --> 00:13:25,653 Yeah, because I'm sure that if you let me have a word with your friend down there, 243 00:13:25,653 --> 00:13:28,830 I could convince her that we should work things out. 244 00:13:33,051 --> 00:13:35,097 I almost had you there, didn't I? 245 00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:39,536 Come on. 246 00:13:39,536 --> 00:13:42,278 Look, Benjamin, 247 00:13:42,278 --> 00:13:45,455 You wanted a divorce, and you got it. 248 00:13:45,455 --> 00:13:48,197 No. Now you gotta let me get on with my life. 249 00:13:48,197 --> 00:13:50,460 It's only fair. 250 00:13:50,460 --> 00:13:52,723 - I fucked it up, didn't i? - Big time. 251 00:13:52,723 --> 00:13:56,336 all right. I'm sorry. 252 00:13:56,336 --> 00:13:59,556 - Good night. - Good night. 253 00:13:59,556 --> 00:14:03,081 Ben, did you ever cheat on Maria? Yeah, I cheated on Maria. 254 00:14:03,081 --> 00:14:05,040 But it wasn't really my fault. 255 00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:07,521 She was the first and only woman that I had ever had sex with. 256 00:14:07,521 --> 00:14:10,306 Besides, we were way too young-- 257 00:14:10,306 --> 00:14:12,308 Way too young to get married. 258 00:14:12,308 --> 00:14:15,529 Especially me. I could never see myself... 259 00:14:15,529 --> 00:14:18,575 Never having sex with another woman. 260 00:14:18,575 --> 00:14:22,623 It's crazy. not that I didn't love Maria, because i still love Maria. 261 00:14:22,623 --> 00:14:26,409 But I would find myself walking down the street wanting to have sex with every woman i saw. 262 00:14:26,409 --> 00:14:28,324 eventually I tried to. 263 00:14:40,510 --> 00:14:42,599 Why would you even go see her again? 264 00:14:42,599 --> 00:14:45,733 - I miss her very much. - No you don't. You're just horny. 265 00:14:45,733 --> 00:14:48,562 When was the last time you got laid? 266 00:14:48,562 --> 00:14:51,391 I don't know. Like a month or so. 267 00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:53,567 A month or so? 268 00:14:53,567 --> 00:14:57,788 Yeah, it was like October or November. 269 00:14:57,788 --> 00:15:01,183 You know what? It's March, Benny. that's four months. 270 00:15:01,183 --> 00:15:05,143 You've got a semen buildup. it's clouding your judgment. 271 00:15:05,143 --> 00:15:08,103 - Go out, find yourself someone, you get laid. - Right. 272 00:15:08,103 --> 00:15:10,627 I guarantee you, one week in a new relationship, 273 00:15:10,627 --> 00:15:14,239 you're gonna forget all about Maria... again. 274 00:15:14,239 --> 00:15:17,155 Remember why you got divorced? 275 00:15:17,155 --> 00:15:20,289 - I cheated on her. - And you cheated on her because what? 276 00:15:20,289 --> 00:15:23,466 You were miserable and because you were too young to get married. 277 00:15:23,466 --> 00:15:26,643 We're gonna be rock stars. we got no time for wives... 278 00:15:26,643 --> 00:15:30,038 Because we're gonna have scores of groupies, to do whatever we want. 279 00:15:30,038 --> 00:15:33,998 Listen. Hey, if you're horny, get a hooker. 280 00:15:33,998 --> 00:15:36,131 No. see, that's for you. 281 00:15:36,131 --> 00:15:39,177 - I couldn't do that. - What's wrong with a hooker? 282 00:15:39,177 --> 00:15:41,441 No. I don't want it on my resume. 283 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,791 I don't want to get old, have kids, and have the kids find out... 284 00:15:43,791 --> 00:15:46,576 That their father was with a hooker. 285 00:15:46,576 --> 00:15:50,928 How the fuck they gonna find that out? I don't know. 286 00:15:50,928 --> 00:15:53,670 It's not even like i have a moral stance here. 287 00:15:53,670 --> 00:15:57,457 - Forget i brought it up. Forget it. - That's not for me. 288 00:15:57,457 --> 00:16:00,460 I gotta roll. I gotta meet my mom uptown. All right. 289 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:05,116 She's taking me to Bloomingdales to go shoppin'. you wanna come? 290 00:16:05,116 --> 00:16:08,598 No. No. I gotta get back to work. 291 00:16:08,598 --> 00:16:11,253 I'll see you at rehearsal. Yeah. All right, man. 292 00:16:11,253 --> 00:16:13,429 Be good. You take it easy. 293 00:16:13,429 --> 00:16:15,649 - See you at rehearsal. All right. - Check you later. 294 00:16:15,649 --> 00:16:18,042 Hi. 295 00:16:18,042 --> 00:16:21,393 - Would you like anything else? - No, I'm all right. 296 00:16:21,393 --> 00:16:23,744 - Just the check. - Okay. 297 00:16:29,706 --> 00:16:31,969 I was thinking that Gio was right about what he had said. 298 00:16:31,969 --> 00:16:35,712 Maybe I should get back out there and start looking for a girl. 299 00:16:35,712 --> 00:16:38,280 So when I thought that waitress at the coffee shop-- 300 00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:40,369 She's gorgeous, right? 301 00:16:40,369 --> 00:16:43,546 It was obvious to me she was sending me those kinds of signals, 302 00:16:43,546 --> 00:16:46,375 so I thought I'd stop by after work and see if I could chat her up. 303 00:16:49,857 --> 00:16:52,294 - Hey, how you doin'? How's it goin'? - Good. 304 00:16:52,294 --> 00:16:54,514 - Do I know you? - You don't remember? 305 00:16:54,514 --> 00:16:57,734 - I was in the coffee shop earlier today. remember? - That's right. 306 00:16:57,734 --> 00:17:01,216 There was a moment where you were looking at me and smiling. 307 00:17:01,216 --> 00:17:04,349 And I said, "oh, boy! you don't--" 308 00:17:04,349 --> 00:17:06,700 I thought maybe I'd come by and introduce myself. how you doin'? 309 00:17:06,700 --> 00:17:08,745 - Hello. Ashley - How are you? 310 00:17:08,745 --> 00:17:12,793 It seemed obvious to me that there was something special between us. 311 00:17:12,793 --> 00:17:16,666 Really? when was that? While i was pouring you your coffee? 312 00:17:16,666 --> 00:17:18,755 Right. There was then. And then there was one-- 313 00:17:18,755 --> 00:17:22,759 You were behind the counter and I looked at you, and you smiled at me again. 314 00:17:22,759 --> 00:17:26,328 If you're so into me, why did you only leave me a 50-cent tip? 315 00:17:26,328 --> 00:17:29,984 - It doesn't make any sense. - Let's be serious. 316 00:17:29,984 --> 00:17:32,813 As much as i felt the connection, I only had a couple cups of coffee. 317 00:17:32,813 --> 00:17:36,730 I've got to be honest with you buddy. You're not doing a great job selling yourself. 318 00:17:36,730 --> 00:17:38,819 - really? - really. 319 00:17:38,819 --> 00:17:41,343 Maybe it's hard to imagine, but I'm a very nice guy. 320 00:17:41,343 --> 00:17:43,345 I play guitar in a band. 321 00:17:43,345 --> 00:17:46,696 That explains the uniform then? - No. 322 00:17:46,696 --> 00:17:49,264 This is for work. I'm a doorman. 323 00:17:49,264 --> 00:17:52,528 So listen, where are you from? You're not from New York right? 324 00:17:52,528 --> 00:17:54,574 - No, no, no. I'm from Iowa. - Iowa? Okay. 325 00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:58,316 - I was in Atlanta once. - yeah? 326 00:17:58,316 --> 00:18:02,059 Iowa's not in the South. You know that, right? 327 00:18:02,059 --> 00:18:03,974 - I didn't know that. - Okay. Now you know. 328 00:18:03,974 --> 00:18:07,761 Listen, I wanna to ask You out on a date. 329 00:18:07,761 --> 00:18:09,806 I wanna go out on a date with you. 330 00:18:09,806 --> 00:18:13,723 What do you say? Me and you. I'm a nice guy. 331 00:18:13,723 --> 00:18:16,334 'Cause if you say no, I'm gonna be there every day... 332 00:18:16,334 --> 00:18:20,600 At that coffee shop having breakfast until you say yes to me. 333 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:23,341 I'm flattered, I am. You are? I'm glad. 334 00:18:23,341 --> 00:18:26,214 I'm flattered, but i'm seeing somebody, so i can't. 335 00:18:26,214 --> 00:18:28,912 Okay. That's a shame. 336 00:18:28,912 --> 00:18:31,523 Thank you, though. You're very beautiful. 337 00:18:31,523 --> 00:18:34,265 That's very sweet. Thank you. All right. 338 00:18:34,265 --> 00:18:36,833 I've gotta go. bye. All right. Take it easy. 339 00:18:38,052 --> 00:18:39,967 You're very beautiful. 340 00:18:39,967 --> 00:18:42,273 - Thank you. - Okay. 341 00:18:42,273 --> 00:18:44,798 I feel like a fuckin' asshole. 342 00:18:44,798 --> 00:18:46,669 All right. that's proof in itself. 343 00:18:46,669 --> 00:18:49,367 I come off gay in this outfit. 344 00:18:49,367 --> 00:18:53,981 My name is Ashley and i'm 19. I go to N.Y.U. 345 00:18:53,981 --> 00:18:56,461 What if my family sees this? 346 00:18:56,461 --> 00:18:58,463 Can this tape get out at all? 347 00:18:58,463 --> 00:19:02,337 so, that was a lot of fun, huh? 348 00:19:02,337 --> 00:19:05,470 Yeah, it was all right. 349 00:19:05,470 --> 00:19:08,952 What do you mean, "all right"? what is that? 350 00:19:08,952 --> 00:19:10,998 It was fine. 351 00:19:10,998 --> 00:19:14,392 You know. It was just... sex. 352 00:19:14,392 --> 00:19:17,134 What do you mean-- What are you talking about? 353 00:19:17,134 --> 00:19:20,529 It wasn't just sex for me. I mean-- 354 00:19:20,529 --> 00:19:23,532 It seemed to me you were having a pretty good time. - Really? 355 00:19:23,532 --> 00:19:25,708 Is there something wrong? 356 00:19:25,708 --> 00:19:28,145 It's just every time we get together, 357 00:19:28,145 --> 00:19:31,888 It's always in some hotel room and it's only for an hour. 358 00:19:31,888 --> 00:19:34,848 Would you rather not see me at all? - No. No. 359 00:19:34,848 --> 00:19:38,982 I'd rather see-- I'd rather you were a single guy... 360 00:19:38,982 --> 00:19:41,811 That could take me to movies and dinner once in a while, 361 00:19:41,811 --> 00:19:46,337 Instead of some married man who i have to have sex with during his lunch breaks. 362 00:19:46,337 --> 00:19:48,557 What would you rather have me do? 363 00:19:48,557 --> 00:19:52,430 Would you rather I parade you around the city so my wife can find out about us? 364 00:19:52,430 --> 00:19:54,519 Would that make you happy? 365 00:19:54,519 --> 00:19:56,783 Honestly? Yes. Yes, it would, 366 00:19:56,783 --> 00:19:59,655 Because i'm feeling pretty cheap right now. - oh, come on. 367 00:19:59,655 --> 00:20:02,310 You knew what this was when you entered into it. 368 00:20:02,310 --> 00:20:05,530 You knew i was a married man and I did not want to get divorced. 369 00:20:05,530 --> 00:20:08,403 That was the arrangement, and you said okay. 370 00:20:08,403 --> 00:20:10,622 If you want to put an end to it now, fine, let's do it. 371 00:20:10,622 --> 00:20:12,668 You're such an asshole! 372 00:20:12,668 --> 00:20:15,540 Why am I an asshole? Why? Because I'm honest with you? 373 00:20:15,540 --> 00:20:17,978 Because I'm trying to help you? 374 00:20:17,978 --> 00:20:20,937 Besides, what would you like me to tell my wife? 375 00:20:20,937 --> 00:20:23,984 How about the truth? hat might help. 376 00:20:23,984 --> 00:20:27,552 You've got some dumb young slut who agrees to have sex with you... 377 00:20:27,552 --> 00:20:30,468 In hotel rooms on your lunch break. 378 00:20:30,468 --> 00:20:33,602 But she's getting fed up! So you better smarten up or you might lose her. 379 00:20:33,602 --> 00:20:36,561 That's what you should tell your wife. That's nice, that's really nice. 380 00:20:36,561 --> 00:20:39,086 - Are you done? Are you done now? - No. i'm an idiot. 381 00:20:39,086 --> 00:20:42,350 - Why are you an idiot? - I'm so fucking stupid. 382 00:20:42,350 --> 00:20:45,570 I'm being kept by a married man who can't get it up half the time. 383 00:20:45,570 --> 00:20:48,312 It happened once. Once. - Twice. 384 00:20:48,312 --> 00:20:52,403 One and a half, 'cause remember, we finished-- we finished. 385 00:20:52,403 --> 00:20:55,363 What are you doing? What's going on? 386 00:20:55,363 --> 00:20:58,670 Come on. What are you doing? 387 00:20:58,670 --> 00:21:02,500 Are you gonna tell me you've never had a good time with me? 388 00:21:02,500 --> 00:21:05,460 huh? you like this. 389 00:21:05,460 --> 00:21:07,592 So do i. 390 00:21:07,592 --> 00:21:11,553 You like the clandestine nature of it. you told me that. 391 00:21:11,553 --> 00:21:15,035 You told me you liked going to nice hotel rooms. You'd never been to a nice hotel. 392 00:21:15,035 --> 00:21:17,907 Come on. 393 00:21:17,907 --> 00:21:21,345 I'd trade all of that just to be able to walk down the street with you... 394 00:21:21,345 --> 00:21:24,914 And hold your hand just once in public. 395 00:21:24,914 --> 00:21:27,612 Maybe that will happen someday. 396 00:21:27,612 --> 00:21:30,485 That would be nice. well? 397 00:21:30,485 --> 00:21:32,400 Come on. 398 00:21:38,580 --> 00:21:41,235 Griffin? hmm? 399 00:21:41,235 --> 00:21:43,759 - Lance wants to see you. - Okay. I'll be right there. 400 00:21:43,759 --> 00:21:46,283 Now. 401 00:21:46,283 --> 00:21:48,720 okay. Rinse out, paul. 402 00:21:49,896 --> 00:21:53,595 - Another late lunch? - Jealous? 403 00:21:58,643 --> 00:22:01,037 What's goin' on, Lance? Hey, not much. 404 00:22:01,037 --> 00:22:03,257 Just wanted to see how you were. 405 00:22:03,257 --> 00:22:06,521 - Me? regarding what? - Oh, just in general. 406 00:22:06,521 --> 00:22:08,697 You seemed a little distracted recently. 407 00:22:08,697 --> 00:22:12,222 - I wanted to make sure everything was all right. - No, I'm fine. 408 00:22:12,222 --> 00:22:14,834 - Annie? - She's fine. 409 00:22:14,834 --> 00:22:18,359 - And the little girl? - You know. 410 00:22:18,359 --> 00:22:21,623 - Griff, why don't you get a divorce? - Shh. 411 00:22:21,623 --> 00:22:24,191 You're not being fair to Annie. 412 00:22:24,191 --> 00:22:26,933 I told you, I can't get a divorce again. 413 00:22:26,933 --> 00:22:29,065 - Come on. - Why not? 414 00:22:29,065 --> 00:22:31,067 Because then I'd be a two-time loser. 415 00:22:31,067 --> 00:22:35,115 Come on, Lance. If you knew how much money my first wife took from me... 416 00:22:35,115 --> 00:22:37,465 Every month, it would break your heart. 417 00:22:37,465 --> 00:22:40,685 I had to give up the town house the first time around. I can't go through that again. 418 00:22:40,685 --> 00:22:43,906 So you're telling me that you're resigned to the fact... 419 00:22:43,906 --> 00:22:47,040 That you're gonna stay married to a woman you don't love... 420 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:49,129 For the rest of your life? 421 00:22:49,129 --> 00:22:52,306 I love Annie. that's not what-- 422 00:22:52,306 --> 00:22:56,658 How many couples do you know stay together, right, for a long time, 423 00:22:56,658 --> 00:23:00,357 and they talk about passion, the sex, the lust? 424 00:23:00,357 --> 00:23:04,666 It doesn't happen. After a while, people stay married for other reasons. 425 00:23:04,666 --> 00:23:08,670 They stay together for companionship, for stability, security. 426 00:23:08,670 --> 00:23:11,978 I mean-- that's what happens. It's normal. 427 00:23:11,978 --> 00:23:14,676 Griff, when you get up in the morning and look in the mirror, 428 00:23:14,676 --> 00:23:16,983 you like what you see? 429 00:23:20,029 --> 00:23:23,598 Uh, well, my name is Griffin Eretso. 430 00:23:23,598 --> 00:23:26,166 I'm 39. I'm from the Bronx. i've been married for six years. 431 00:23:26,166 --> 00:23:29,169 And, you know, the thing with Ashley is-- 432 00:23:29,169 --> 00:23:31,954 You know, the little girl. 433 00:23:31,954 --> 00:23:34,348 I really love her. I do. she's great. 434 00:23:34,348 --> 00:23:36,741 But you know, what am I gonna do? 435 00:23:36,741 --> 00:23:40,310 I'm married and I can't get another divorce. 436 00:23:40,310 --> 00:23:42,704 you know, i-- I love spending time with her. 437 00:23:42,704 --> 00:23:46,664 We have a great time together. 438 00:23:46,664 --> 00:23:50,799 She's a great kid. But can i imagine spending any real time with her? 439 00:23:50,799 --> 00:23:55,673 No. I mean, maybe. I don't know. I mean-- 440 00:23:58,067 --> 00:24:01,897 I think that's why I like to keep it restricted to hotel rooms. 441 00:24:01,897 --> 00:24:06,162 Because we talk a little, we have sex and then I go. 442 00:24:06,162 --> 00:24:10,732 And I guess I never really have to get to know her because-- 443 00:24:12,603 --> 00:24:16,651 And that's actually kind of sad, I guess, but, you know-- 444 00:24:16,651 --> 00:24:18,914 What am I gonna do? I'm married. 445 00:24:18,914 --> 00:24:21,221 Are you guys really moving? 446 00:24:21,221 --> 00:24:25,442 This is a beautiful city. Why would you want to live anywhere else? 447 00:24:25,442 --> 00:24:28,750 I'm not saying I dislike the city. I'm saying I'm burnt out on it. 448 00:24:28,750 --> 00:24:31,318 I need a little nature now and again. 449 00:24:31,318 --> 00:24:34,625 yeah. central park isn't cutting the mustard for him anymore. 450 00:24:34,625 --> 00:24:39,108 Perhaps it's because I've turned 40, but i'm experiencing this enormous void in my life. 451 00:24:39,108 --> 00:24:43,069 It needs to be filled. - Hello! I got a void here that needs to be filled. 452 00:24:43,069 --> 00:24:45,288 You don't seem too concerned with that. 453 00:24:45,288 --> 00:24:49,771 A little tact, please? must you reduce everything into a conversation about sex? 454 00:24:49,771 --> 00:24:52,426 - I'm sorry. you're right, honey. - Thank you. 455 00:24:52,426 --> 00:24:57,561 I just thought if I talked about it, I might get some once in a while. 456 00:24:57,561 --> 00:25:00,782 So, has Grizzly Adams here explained to you... 457 00:25:00,782 --> 00:25:05,613 How he plans to fill this void? - No. 458 00:25:05,613 --> 00:25:08,094 I've purchased land upstate. I'm going to build a log cabin on it. 459 00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:12,620 You're going to build a log cabin? 460 00:25:12,620 --> 00:25:16,450 From scratch. just me, the logs and some cutting tools. 461 00:25:16,450 --> 00:25:19,583 And when I'm finished, I shall retire there and live out the rest of my days. 462 00:25:19,583 --> 00:25:22,151 Retire at age 40? that's--why not? 463 00:25:22,151 --> 00:25:25,937 Tell them about the tepee I'm gonna sleep in when I visit. 464 00:25:25,937 --> 00:25:27,939 - This is good. - ha-ha-ha-ha! 465 00:25:27,939 --> 00:25:31,595 Have you heard of the expression "firewood warms you twice"? 466 00:25:31,595 --> 00:25:33,728 Once when you cut it and once when you burn it. 467 00:25:33,728 --> 00:25:35,947 I'll take half that action. 468 00:25:35,947 --> 00:25:40,474 My point is simply that I'm looking forward to getting in touch with nature. 469 00:25:40,474 --> 00:25:42,650 I give you a week outside of manhattan... 470 00:25:42,650 --> 00:25:46,741 Without your Sunday Times and box seats at shea. 471 00:25:46,741 --> 00:25:49,091 Oh, look, she's drunk... again. 472 00:25:49,091 --> 00:25:51,615 You know, Harry, I know what you're saying. 473 00:25:51,615 --> 00:25:53,661 I feel the void. 474 00:25:53,661 --> 00:25:56,794 what are you talking about? Since when do you feel the void? 475 00:25:56,794 --> 00:26:00,624 I've felt it for a while. I think we all focus on the wrong things, 476 00:26:00,624 --> 00:26:04,237 like clothes, money, diet, stupid crap. 477 00:26:04,237 --> 00:26:08,676 You think about our grandparents. they went through two wars, the depression. 478 00:26:08,676 --> 00:26:11,592 They had to think about where was their next meal coming from, 479 00:26:11,592 --> 00:26:13,681 and could they afford to keep the apartment heated, 480 00:26:13,681 --> 00:26:16,162 and who's gonna pay for the doctor when someone got sick. 481 00:26:16,162 --> 00:26:18,294 They were miserable. 482 00:26:18,294 --> 00:26:20,818 they had a reason to be, whereas we, on the other hand, don't. 483 00:26:20,818 --> 00:26:22,951 I totally agree with you, Annie. 484 00:26:22,951 --> 00:26:24,866 You're so full of shit! 485 00:26:24,866 --> 00:26:27,086 His parents grew up on Park Avenue. 486 00:26:27,086 --> 00:26:29,653 Once again, she misses the point completely. 487 00:26:29,653 --> 00:26:31,960 - Oh, wow. - I'm sorry. 488 00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:34,963 My name's Annie Matthews and I'm 29. 489 00:26:34,963 --> 00:26:37,270 I grew up on the upper east side of manhattan. 490 00:26:37,270 --> 00:26:41,491 I feel very frustrated with my friends and my life recently. 491 00:26:41,491 --> 00:26:45,104 We live in such a cushy society. We have no real threats, no real problems, 492 00:26:45,104 --> 00:26:48,629 so we obsess on these silly little things. 493 00:26:48,629 --> 00:26:52,720 we create problems, especially sexual, and I think it's pathetic. 494 00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:57,638 Almost everyone I know is obsessed with their sexuality and their sexual life. 495 00:26:57,638 --> 00:27:00,206 And i think all this thinking about it can't be healthy. 496 00:27:00,206 --> 00:27:03,948 If you look at television, movies, advertising, internet-- 497 00:27:03,948 --> 00:27:08,083 I mean, everyone is just obsessed. 498 00:27:08,083 --> 00:27:11,695 They spend all their time thinking and talking about their sexual lives. 499 00:27:11,695 --> 00:27:13,915 What would you rather them talk about? 500 00:27:13,915 --> 00:27:18,876 I don't know, but I think there could be deeper things people could talk about, 501 00:27:18,876 --> 00:27:24,447 Like having a family and sticking together through good times and bad times. 502 00:27:24,447 --> 00:27:29,713 You know, but it's always, like, "he's insensitive," or "she's cold." 503 00:27:29,713 --> 00:27:32,890 I mean, who really gives a shit about how many orgasms-- 504 00:27:32,890 --> 00:27:34,588 How many orgasms you can have? 505 00:27:34,588 --> 00:27:37,286 Who cares about love anymore? 506 00:27:37,286 --> 00:27:39,375 Doesn't anyone care about that? 507 00:27:39,375 --> 00:27:42,161 Ahh. Christ! 508 00:27:42,161 --> 00:27:44,424 That was a lot of fun. 509 00:27:44,424 --> 00:27:46,817 I guarantee those two will be divorced within the month. 510 00:27:46,817 --> 00:27:49,342 Why do you say that? They've always talked like that. 511 00:27:49,342 --> 00:27:53,998 Harry talking that crap about his cabin and void? 512 00:27:53,998 --> 00:27:58,002 The only void he has is that he wants to fuck other women. 513 00:27:58,002 --> 00:28:00,527 Why do you say that? 514 00:28:00,527 --> 00:28:03,356 Are you guys such great friends that he'd confide in you about that? 515 00:28:03,356 --> 00:28:06,533 No, but we've had drinks together. 516 00:28:06,533 --> 00:28:09,536 He starts to drink too much and he starts to talk. I mean-- 517 00:28:09,536 --> 00:28:12,016 What are you saying? Has he cheated on her? 518 00:28:12,016 --> 00:28:15,150 I don't know specifics, But I do know that one time we went out... 519 00:28:15,150 --> 00:28:17,587 And he was drinking, 520 00:28:17,587 --> 00:28:22,462 And talking to this young bimbo and... He left with her. 521 00:28:22,462 --> 00:28:24,507 If anything happened after that, I don't know, so-- 522 00:28:24,507 --> 00:28:26,727 How could you not tell me about this earlier? 523 00:28:26,727 --> 00:28:29,338 Harry's a friend of mine, that's why. 524 00:28:29,338 --> 00:28:31,471 Since when? I introduced you. 525 00:28:31,471 --> 00:28:36,040 What does that mean? Harry can't be my friend too? - No, he can. 526 00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:39,130 But your loyalty should be to Hillary Because you knew her first. 527 00:28:39,130 --> 00:28:41,655 You want to know the truth? I never liked Hillary. 528 00:28:41,655 --> 00:28:45,485 Frankly, I don't blame Harry for getting a little something on the side. 529 00:28:45,485 --> 00:28:49,228 That is so disgusting! she is my best friend. Secondly, they're married. 530 00:28:49,228 --> 00:28:52,318 Do you think that's acceptable behavior for him to get some on the side? 531 00:28:52,318 --> 00:28:55,669 That's not what i'm saying, but he and I have talked about his sex life. 532 00:28:55,669 --> 00:28:59,325 And frankly, she is not the warmest person. 533 00:28:59,325 --> 00:29:01,544 She is not the most giving, okay? 534 00:29:01,544 --> 00:29:04,591 So, a guy like that, he gets his load on... 535 00:29:04,591 --> 00:29:08,203 And he wants to find a little warmth and kindness somewhere else. 536 00:29:08,203 --> 00:29:13,513 "warmth and kindness"? That's fucking gross! Let me ask you a question! 537 00:29:13,513 --> 00:29:15,645 How would you feel if I went out to seek warmth and kindness... 538 00:29:15,645 --> 00:29:19,258 From some young stud? - But you would never do that, so. 539 00:29:19,258 --> 00:29:21,564 That is not the fucking point. 540 00:29:21,564 --> 00:29:23,610 You're not as affectionate as you used to be. 541 00:29:23,610 --> 00:29:25,960 But does that give me the right to cheat on you? 542 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:28,267 Why are we having this conversation? 543 00:29:28,267 --> 00:29:31,270 Can we calm down? It's idiocy. Let's change the subject. 544 00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:33,924 I don't think it's idiocy to talk about fidelity and monogamy... 545 00:29:33,924 --> 00:29:36,623 With a person you're married to. 546 00:29:36,623 --> 00:29:39,365 If our sex life wasn't great, would you come to me and talk about it... 547 00:29:39,365 --> 00:29:42,019 So we could work on it, or would you just have an affair? 548 00:29:42,019 --> 00:29:46,633 have an affair? Why would you ever think I would do such a thing? 549 00:29:46,633 --> 00:29:49,636 I don't know. maybe 'cause you cheated on your first wife. 550 00:29:51,464 --> 00:29:53,857 Okay, all right. that's true. 551 00:29:53,857 --> 00:29:56,295 But it was different because I didn't love her. 552 00:29:56,295 --> 00:29:58,209 And I love you, so it's totally different. 553 00:29:58,209 --> 00:30:00,864 Look, why do you compare me to Harry? 554 00:30:00,864 --> 00:30:05,695 Harry's a shark. This is a guy who cheats hardworking people... 555 00:30:05,695 --> 00:30:07,697 Out of their hard-earned money every day of his life. 556 00:30:07,697 --> 00:30:10,047 That's his job. That's what he does. 557 00:30:10,047 --> 00:30:13,181 I'll tell you something. you marry a guy like that, who's a scumbag in his job? 558 00:30:13,181 --> 00:30:15,052 He's a scumbag in life. 559 00:30:15,052 --> 00:30:18,229 What do I do for a living? I'm a dentist. 560 00:30:21,058 --> 00:30:23,539 Honey, I can't believe you're-- 561 00:30:23,539 --> 00:30:26,803 I'm sorry about what I said about Hillary. I am. 562 00:30:26,803 --> 00:30:29,371 I know she's your best friend. it was very insensitive. 563 00:30:29,371 --> 00:30:32,505 I'm telling you, just don't ever fucking cheat on me, Okay? 564 00:30:32,505 --> 00:30:34,463 Okay! 565 00:30:37,466 --> 00:30:40,513 I can't believe we're even having this conversation. It's so silly. 566 00:30:40,513 --> 00:30:43,254 My first wife, um-- 567 00:30:43,254 --> 00:30:46,301 Her name was Sara. 568 00:30:46,301 --> 00:30:48,564 And, yeah, I cheated on her. 569 00:30:48,564 --> 00:30:51,611 We were married three years. Only after three years I started cheating on her. 570 00:30:51,611 --> 00:30:54,875 It wasn't because we weren't having a good sex life. We had a very good sex life. 571 00:30:54,875 --> 00:30:57,312 It was just that I have a very... 572 00:30:57,312 --> 00:31:00,228 European outlook on marriage. 573 00:31:00,228 --> 00:31:02,926 I don't necessarily believe in monogamy. 574 00:31:02,926 --> 00:31:05,364 I love my wife, I'm with her, we have sex, 575 00:31:05,364 --> 00:31:07,496 But then i have the occasional affair. 576 00:31:07,496 --> 00:31:11,587 It's been done in Italy and France, uh, for years. 577 00:31:11,587 --> 00:31:14,590 I don't know if the germans do it. I don't know what they-- 578 00:31:14,590 --> 00:31:17,332 I don't know what they do. but, you know-- 579 00:31:17,332 --> 00:31:20,161 but, you know-- you know-- you know-- 580 00:31:20,161 --> 00:31:23,425 So, it's a very different life. 581 00:31:23,425 --> 00:31:26,689 That's the kind of life that I have and-- 582 00:31:26,689 --> 00:31:30,650 I think what Annie doesn't know isn't gonna hurt her, to tell you the truth. 583 00:31:30,650 --> 00:31:32,739 I think it's depressing sometimes. 584 00:31:32,739 --> 00:31:35,437 You pass thousands of people on the street every day, 585 00:31:35,437 --> 00:31:38,571 Yet you can still feel so isolated. 586 00:31:38,571 --> 00:31:41,617 Isolated and alone. you walk by. 587 00:31:41,617 --> 00:31:44,272 You're in a crowd of people-- millions of people. 588 00:31:44,272 --> 00:31:48,015 Yet nobody knows you, they don't know what you're going through and-- 589 00:31:48,015 --> 00:31:51,366 I don't know. I just feel kind of melancholy lately. 590 00:31:51,366 --> 00:31:53,803 I'm turning 30 next year, 591 00:31:53,803 --> 00:31:56,676 And I guess my life just isn't what I thought it would be. 592 00:32:01,985 --> 00:32:05,598 Excuse me. Are you the real estate agent? 593 00:32:05,598 --> 00:32:08,383 Yes. Annie Matthews. nice to meet you. how are you? Tommy. 594 00:32:08,383 --> 00:32:10,298 Shall we go up? - Yeah. 595 00:32:15,172 --> 00:32:19,046 It's a great neighborhood. It's recently been renovated. 2,500 square feet. 596 00:32:19,046 --> 00:32:22,484 - How many bedrooms? - Three bedrooms, two-and-a-half baths. 597 00:32:22,484 --> 00:32:25,661 That's good, that's good. I want to find a big place like this. 598 00:32:25,661 --> 00:32:28,664 The kind of house where you can grow old in, you raise a family in. 599 00:32:28,664 --> 00:32:31,667 I'm sure your wife would love it. How many kids do you have? 600 00:32:31,667 --> 00:32:34,540 My wife? I'll let you know when i meet her. 601 00:32:34,540 --> 00:32:36,629 How many? 602 00:32:36,629 --> 00:32:39,632 Like five, maybe. 603 00:32:39,632 --> 00:32:41,677 Gotta start with five, you know? 604 00:32:41,677 --> 00:32:44,637 What do i look like, a bunny rabbit? How am i gonna have five kids? 605 00:32:44,637 --> 00:32:47,466 So what about you? Any kids? - No. 606 00:32:47,466 --> 00:32:49,598 hmm. You married, though? 607 00:32:49,598 --> 00:32:52,645 That's a wedding ring on your finger, right - Yeah. 608 00:32:52,645 --> 00:32:55,691 - Happy? - Are you writing a book? 609 00:32:55,691 --> 00:32:57,693 I'm sorry. I'm just, you know-- 610 00:32:57,693 --> 00:33:00,653 I was just trying to make polite conversation. 611 00:33:00,653 --> 00:33:03,830 - So, what do you think of this place? - It's nice, it's big. 612 00:33:03,830 --> 00:33:08,051 But it doesn't feel like me. It's a little feminine. 613 00:33:08,051 --> 00:33:09,792 We'll keep looking then. 614 00:33:12,708 --> 00:33:16,233 Where you runnin' off to? - If you can believe it, I've got a date tonight. 615 00:33:16,233 --> 00:33:19,323 Good for you. you got right back out there, huh, kid? 616 00:33:19,323 --> 00:33:22,152 That's great. 617 00:33:22,152 --> 00:33:24,067 Aren't you gonna take a shower? 618 00:33:24,067 --> 00:33:26,722 Think I need to? 619 00:33:26,722 --> 00:33:29,986 There's a definite scent of something there. 620 00:33:29,986 --> 00:33:33,468 I don't now what it is. Slap some cologne on. You'll be all right. 621 00:33:33,468 --> 00:33:35,949 I don't like to wear cologne, but thanks anyway. 622 00:33:35,949 --> 00:33:39,343 - I think I'll be fine. - You don't wear cologne? 623 00:33:39,343 --> 00:33:43,217 You'd rather show up on your date smelling like some barnyard animal. 624 00:33:43,217 --> 00:33:47,526 Slap some cologne on. shows you got class. 625 00:33:49,615 --> 00:33:51,660 Don't forget the balls. 626 00:33:51,660 --> 00:33:55,229 - What are you talking about? - Spray some on your balls. 627 00:33:55,229 --> 00:33:58,232 I'm not gonna put cologne on my balls. you think I'm some sort of savage? 628 00:33:58,232 --> 00:34:00,364 I want you to listen to me on this. 629 00:34:00,364 --> 00:34:02,932 I could smell your armpits from here, okay? 630 00:34:02,932 --> 00:34:06,719 What do you think your balls are gonna smell like when she sticks her face there? 631 00:34:06,719 --> 00:34:08,721 Give those bad boys a spritz and she'll love it. 632 00:34:08,721 --> 00:34:12,638 Go ahead, do what I tell you. 633 00:34:12,638 --> 00:34:15,771 All right. You're a sick man, but I'll do it in the next room. 634 00:34:15,771 --> 00:34:18,731 They love it when the balls smell nice. 635 00:34:18,731 --> 00:34:21,777 Let's them know you care. 636 00:34:21,777 --> 00:34:25,172 Would i have sex on the first date? 637 00:34:25,172 --> 00:34:30,394 I think i might be starting to sound like an asshole here, but who wouldn't? 638 00:34:30,394 --> 00:34:33,049 Oh, sure. I'm not one of those girls that thinks... 639 00:34:33,049 --> 00:34:35,312 She can't have a real relationship with a guy... 640 00:34:35,312 --> 00:34:37,401 If she sleeps with him on the first date. 641 00:34:37,401 --> 00:34:39,534 You know, that's silly. 642 00:34:39,534 --> 00:34:41,841 Oh, I'm all for it, preferably before... 643 00:34:41,841 --> 00:34:45,366 Going to the movie and paying for the popcorn. 644 00:34:45,366 --> 00:34:49,196 Um, I just think it's weird that there's this person out there... 645 00:34:49,196 --> 00:34:51,720 Just walking around, leading their life. 646 00:34:51,720 --> 00:34:56,507 Then you meet them in a bar, and then two or three hours later, you have their penis inside you. 647 00:34:56,507 --> 00:34:58,466 I think that's a little scary. 648 00:34:58,466 --> 00:35:01,730 I was happy. or thought I was. 649 00:35:01,730 --> 00:35:04,472 But he thought we were too young... 650 00:35:04,472 --> 00:35:07,780 And couldn't see himself being faithful for the rest of his life. 651 00:35:07,780 --> 00:35:10,826 So what happened? what, you got divorced? 652 00:35:10,826 --> 00:35:14,700 Not until i found out that he was sleeping with other women. 653 00:35:14,700 --> 00:35:17,833 You see, it's so fragile. I don't know a single person... 654 00:35:17,833 --> 00:35:20,444 That hasn't either cheated on their spouse... 655 00:35:20,444 --> 00:35:23,447 Or been cheated on at some time. - I know, it's depressing. 656 00:35:23,447 --> 00:35:26,973 So what happened? Did you catch him? How did you find out? 657 00:35:26,973 --> 00:35:29,018 You weren't hitting on her? 658 00:35:29,018 --> 00:35:31,455 No! I was just talking to her! 659 00:35:31,455 --> 00:35:33,806 I was standing right there. I heard you. 660 00:35:33,806 --> 00:35:36,504 What did you hear? You want me to repeat it? 661 00:35:36,504 --> 00:35:39,115 Yeah, because I didn't say anything... - Oh, really! 662 00:35:39,115 --> 00:35:41,422 That would warrant these accusations. 663 00:35:41,422 --> 00:35:45,469 Telling someone I work with, that I have to see every day, that she has nice tits... 664 00:35:45,469 --> 00:35:48,168 - Doesn't warrant these accusations? - I didn't say that. 665 00:35:48,168 --> 00:35:51,475 All I'm saying is, you have really nice breasts. 666 00:35:51,475 --> 00:35:55,479 All right, maybe I said something like that, but I was only kidding. 667 00:35:55,479 --> 00:35:59,483 - kidding? - yeah! I was flirting, but a kidding kind of flirting. 668 00:35:59,483 --> 00:36:02,095 No. flirting I don't have a problem with. flirting is one thing. 669 00:36:02,095 --> 00:36:05,315 But trying to fuck one of my co-workers-- That I have a problem with. 670 00:36:05,315 --> 00:36:07,796 Jesus, I mean that is harsh.mm-hmm. 671 00:36:07,796 --> 00:36:11,539 What about you? Have you been on a lot of dates since the divorce? 672 00:36:11,539 --> 00:36:14,455 Have you ever heard of a born-again virgin? 673 00:36:14,455 --> 00:36:17,806 - Really? It's been that long? - Over a year. 674 00:36:17,806 --> 00:36:20,330 That cannot be healthy. That's unnatural. 675 00:36:20,330 --> 00:36:23,464 Actually, it's not that bad. 676 00:36:23,464 --> 00:36:25,596 After a while, you don't miss it so much. 677 00:36:25,596 --> 00:36:28,121 You gotta be kidding me? You know what's gonna happen? 678 00:36:28,121 --> 00:36:32,429 The minute you get it again, you're gonna kick yourself for being out of the game so long. 679 00:36:32,429 --> 00:36:34,649 It's not like I have a lot of options out there. 680 00:36:34,649 --> 00:36:38,435 The guys in the city, the decent ones, are few and far between. 681 00:36:38,435 --> 00:36:41,525 What the hell am I, fucking Doogie Howser? 682 00:36:41,525 --> 00:36:44,790 What is that supposed to mean? Are you offering your services to me? 683 00:36:44,790 --> 00:36:48,489 I wasn't gonna come right out and say it, but yeah. 684 00:36:48,489 --> 00:36:51,710 Of course I'd like to, but-- 685 00:36:51,710 --> 00:36:55,452 Hmm. So what do you suggest? 686 00:36:55,452 --> 00:36:58,586 We go to my place and you help me with this little problem i've got. 687 00:36:58,586 --> 00:37:00,501 Is that it? 688 00:37:02,329 --> 00:37:05,636 Did I just blow it? Did I just totally strike out? 689 00:37:08,335 --> 00:37:10,467 No. 690 00:37:10,467 --> 00:37:13,253 Where do you live? 691 00:37:13,253 --> 00:37:16,386 I actually, you know-- 692 00:37:16,386 --> 00:37:19,346 I've got a roommate. Okay, now you're striking out. 693 00:37:19,346 --> 00:37:21,522 Thirty-two years old and you have a roommate? 694 00:37:21,522 --> 00:37:24,177 It's just temporary, because my girlfriend kicked me out. 695 00:37:24,177 --> 00:37:26,527 So it's not-- 696 00:37:26,527 --> 00:37:29,138 What about you? Do you live alone? 697 00:37:30,618 --> 00:37:32,751 Yeah. 698 00:37:32,751 --> 00:37:36,885 So what'd you say you did for a living? 699 00:37:36,885 --> 00:37:40,541 You're a schoolteacher? - Yeah. I teach sixth grade. 700 00:37:40,541 --> 00:37:42,848 You see, that's weird. 701 00:37:42,848 --> 00:37:46,590 I think when you're a kid you can't imagine that your sixth-grade teacher... 702 00:37:46,590 --> 00:37:50,551 Is goin' out on dates, gettin' drunk, taking guys home. 703 00:37:50,551 --> 00:37:53,902 I cannot imagine my sixth-grade teacher... 704 00:37:53,902 --> 00:37:58,428 Lettin' some guy go down on her... at all. - Why? 705 00:37:58,428 --> 00:38:00,561 - Why? - Yeah. 706 00:38:00,561 --> 00:38:02,519 I don't know. maybe because she was a nun. 707 00:38:02,519 --> 00:38:05,305 All right. 708 00:38:05,305 --> 00:38:08,961 I couldn't go through with it tonight because-- 709 00:38:10,571 --> 00:38:13,008 You know, it's just been since my husband, 710 00:38:13,008 --> 00:38:16,011 And it was a little weird, so-- 711 00:38:16,011 --> 00:38:18,579 But that's all. I just wanted to-- 712 00:38:18,579 --> 00:38:21,060 That's cool, that's cool. 713 00:38:21,060 --> 00:38:23,540 It's not like I was looking for a one-night stand or anything. 714 00:38:23,540 --> 00:38:25,542 We can just take it slow. 715 00:38:25,542 --> 00:38:28,545 I mean, I want to see you again. 716 00:38:28,545 --> 00:38:30,504 You wanna see me? 717 00:38:31,722 --> 00:38:34,987 - Yeah. - Good. 718 00:38:34,987 --> 00:38:38,817 You better, because that was a very expensive restaurant, you know? 719 00:38:39,948 --> 00:38:42,255 Expensive meal. 720 00:38:43,473 --> 00:38:48,391 Yeah. Expensive dessert, You know? 721 00:38:48,391 --> 00:38:51,481 - But tasty. - That's right. 722 00:38:51,481 --> 00:38:53,875 So he went down on you on the first date? 723 00:38:53,875 --> 00:38:56,399 Yeah, I know. What do you think about that? 724 00:38:56,399 --> 00:38:58,706 Usually that's not a good sign. 725 00:38:58,706 --> 00:39:02,362 That's what i was thinking, but he went for it before I knew what was happening. 726 00:39:02,362 --> 00:39:04,451 I felt kind of slutty, though. 727 00:39:04,451 --> 00:39:06,583 Why? 728 00:39:06,583 --> 00:39:10,413 I mean, it's not like you had sex with the guy, right? 729 00:39:10,413 --> 00:39:13,155 He went down on me. How was that not sex? 730 00:39:13,155 --> 00:39:15,679 You sound like Bill Clinton. How is that not sex? 731 00:39:15,679 --> 00:39:19,509 It's just not sex. It's not. 732 00:39:19,509 --> 00:39:21,511 I'll tell you what i did find weird. 733 00:39:21,511 --> 00:39:24,558 Do guys usually put cologne on their balls? 734 00:39:24,558 --> 00:39:28,518 - Did he have it on his balls or on his underwear? - His balls. 735 00:39:28,518 --> 00:39:30,520 - Yeah, that's a little weird. - Yuck! 736 00:39:30,520 --> 00:39:32,609 You wrote a song for that hot chick at the diner? 737 00:39:32,609 --> 00:39:35,351 - Hot song for a hot chick. - She said she'd go out with you? 738 00:39:35,351 --> 00:39:37,571 No, not really. 739 00:39:37,571 --> 00:39:40,095 I think she liked me 'cause she didn't seem to hate me. 740 00:39:40,095 --> 00:39:42,097 Where's she from? - Iowa. 741 00:39:42,097 --> 00:39:44,230 Iowa? Where the fuck is Iowa? 742 00:39:44,230 --> 00:39:46,536 Dude, I haven't the slightest. 743 00:39:46,536 --> 00:39:49,539 You want some advice? don't play her that song. 744 00:39:49,539 --> 00:39:51,585 - Why not? - 'cause it's a bubblegum move. 745 00:39:51,585 --> 00:39:53,543 You're gonna embarrass yourself and the band. 746 00:39:53,543 --> 00:39:57,547 But if you insist, better make it a duet. 747 00:39:57,547 --> 00:40:00,899 Yeah, but then she falls for you, and then, you know-- 748 00:40:00,899 --> 00:40:02,509 'cause you've got that voice. - That's what i'm thinkin'. 749 00:40:06,687 --> 00:40:10,604 Hey, Ashley, Sergeant pepper's here again. He's got a guitar with him. 750 00:40:10,604 --> 00:40:13,346 I really hope he's not gonna be serenading you in here. 751 00:40:13,346 --> 00:40:16,740 - Ah, he's kinda cute. - He looks like a freak. What's with that outfit? 752 00:40:19,308 --> 00:40:21,528 - Hi, how's it goin'? - Hi. 753 00:40:21,528 --> 00:40:23,530 - How you doin'? - Good. How you doin'? 754 00:40:23,530 --> 00:40:25,575 I'm doin' good. it's a good day. 755 00:40:25,575 --> 00:40:28,274 - I told you i'd be back. Right? - Yes. 756 00:40:28,274 --> 00:40:30,102 But you got a-- You have the guitar with you. 757 00:40:30,102 --> 00:40:32,408 Yeah, yeah. you know what I did? 758 00:40:32,408 --> 00:40:34,976 Last night I went home and wrote a song for you. 759 00:40:34,976 --> 00:40:37,892 And now I feel like it's not the right time. 760 00:40:37,892 --> 00:40:40,286 Might not be a good idea. I'm a little nervous. 761 00:40:40,286 --> 00:40:44,159 Are you gonna sing or is it just the guitar? 762 00:40:44,159 --> 00:40:47,641 Uh-- you know, if it makes you uncomfortable, don't. 763 00:40:47,641 --> 00:40:51,862 You don't need to do it now. You could come back and play it another time. 764 00:40:51,862 --> 00:40:55,605 I could play a little bit right now probably, for you. 765 00:40:55,605 --> 00:40:59,305 - Whatever you want. - It's a real pretty song. 766 00:40:59,305 --> 00:41:01,611 - What's it called? - It's called "a girl like you." 767 00:41:01,611 --> 00:41:05,224 - A girl like me? - "A girl like you." 768 00:41:05,224 --> 00:41:07,443 yeah, I know. 769 00:41:07,443 --> 00:41:10,142 I mean, was it written about a girl like me? 770 00:41:10,142 --> 00:41:13,406 Like, is this song about a girl like me? 771 00:41:13,406 --> 00:41:16,539 I wrote it for you. 772 00:41:16,539 --> 00:41:19,107 Yeah. 773 00:41:19,107 --> 00:41:21,805 - So, okay. - Okay. 774 00:41:21,805 --> 00:41:25,635 Wait a second. you said you have a boyfriend already, huh? 775 00:41:25,635 --> 00:41:28,595 - Yeah. - Yeah. I remember you said that. 776 00:41:28,595 --> 00:41:30,510 - Maybe I shouldn't play this song. -Yeah. 777 00:41:30,510 --> 00:41:33,469 It might not be right. 778 00:41:33,469 --> 00:41:36,472 It might be like cheating. 779 00:41:36,472 --> 00:41:39,519 Yeah, probably not. 780 00:41:39,519 --> 00:41:41,651 This was weird. I'll probably-- 781 00:41:41,651 --> 00:41:43,653 I'll probably come back another time, okay? 782 00:41:43,653 --> 00:41:45,655 Oh, no. You don't have to go. 783 00:41:45,655 --> 00:41:48,876 No, i have to go. I have to go. ah, I'm stuffed. 784 00:41:48,876 --> 00:41:51,661 But i'll be back without the guitar. All right? 785 00:41:51,661 --> 00:41:53,837 - Take it easy, you. - You too. 786 00:41:53,837 --> 00:41:55,883 Bye. 787 00:41:55,883 --> 00:41:57,885 I got beat up a lot when I was a kid. 788 00:41:57,885 --> 00:42:00,583 So I spent most of my time in my bathroom... 789 00:42:00,583 --> 00:42:03,238 Learning to play guitar and masturbating. 790 00:42:03,238 --> 00:42:06,154 And now that I'm divorced, I basically do the same thing. 791 00:42:09,592 --> 00:42:12,334 ♪ Too many ♪ 792 00:42:13,596 --> 00:42:17,818 ♪ Things I do not care for ♪ 793 00:42:17,818 --> 00:42:22,083 ♪ One thing that i adore ♪ 794 00:42:22,083 --> 00:42:25,086 ♪ Is a girl like you ♪ 795 00:42:27,784 --> 00:42:32,311 ♪ I'm always trying ♪ 796 00:42:32,311 --> 00:42:36,532 ♪ To look you in the eye ♪ 797 00:42:36,532 --> 00:42:38,317 ♪ It's okay ♪ 798 00:42:40,406 --> 00:42:43,539 ♪ A girl like you ♪♪ 799 00:42:54,724 --> 00:42:57,684 Griffin? You don't have to worry. 800 00:42:57,684 --> 00:42:59,729 Nobody's gonna recognize you here. 801 00:42:59,729 --> 00:43:01,731 I hope you know I'm taking a big risk... 802 00:43:01,731 --> 00:43:05,083 Taking you out in public, just--really? 803 00:43:05,083 --> 00:43:09,609 Driving us a half hour out to Brooklyn Just to eat dinner? 804 00:43:09,609 --> 00:43:12,002 - I think you're pretty risk-free. - Okay. 805 00:43:12,002 --> 00:43:14,396 We're here to have a good time, so-- 806 00:43:14,396 --> 00:43:17,486 - Come here. You look very pretty. - Really? 807 00:43:17,486 --> 00:43:22,100 Ashley, how's it goin'? oh, hi ! good. how are you? 808 00:43:22,100 --> 00:43:24,624 - You remember me? - Of course. Ben. 809 00:43:24,624 --> 00:43:27,757 From the coffee shop. how's it goin'? - Good. 810 00:43:27,757 --> 00:43:30,499 What are you doing here? 811 00:43:30,499 --> 00:43:33,154 - I'm having dinner with my grandparents. - Yeah? 812 00:43:33,154 --> 00:43:35,504 They're from Burrough Park. They're so cute. 813 00:43:35,504 --> 00:43:38,072 I figured I take 'em out. I'm sorry. Is this your father? 814 00:43:38,072 --> 00:43:41,249 No, this is my... dentist Griffin, 815 00:43:41,249 --> 00:43:44,252 Griffin, Ben. Ben, Griffin. 816 00:43:44,252 --> 00:43:46,776 - Hi. Pleasure. - Hi. 817 00:43:46,776 --> 00:43:51,781 All right. I was goin' to the bathroom. - Okay. 818 00:43:51,781 --> 00:43:53,740 - See you later. - Bye. 819 00:43:56,786 --> 00:43:58,832 I forgot something at my table. 820 00:43:58,832 --> 00:44:02,575 - You look great. You look really good. - Thanks. thank you. 821 00:44:02,575 --> 00:44:05,578 All right. Nice meeting you. I'm sorry. 822 00:44:05,578 --> 00:44:07,449 Bye, Ben. 823 00:44:08,972 --> 00:44:11,975 He's so sweet. who is he? 824 00:44:14,804 --> 00:44:17,764 He's just this musician guy I used to know. 825 00:44:19,896 --> 00:44:22,160 - You know him or-- - We went out a couple of times. 826 00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,074 Oh, you did go out with him. 827 00:44:24,074 --> 00:44:27,469 So what happened? Why didn't it work? 828 00:44:27,469 --> 00:44:31,473 You know, it's really not very important. 829 00:44:31,473 --> 00:44:33,388 No. I wanna know. 830 00:44:35,434 --> 00:44:37,305 I don't know. uh-- 831 00:44:39,612 --> 00:44:43,224 If i tell you, do you promise me you're not gonna get mad? 832 00:44:43,224 --> 00:44:45,618 Yeah, I promise. 833 00:44:45,618 --> 00:44:48,142 - You promise. - Yeah, i prom-- 834 00:44:48,142 --> 00:44:50,405 - Okay. - I totally promise. 835 00:44:50,405 --> 00:44:53,016 I couldn't have sex with him. 836 00:44:53,016 --> 00:44:56,585 I mean, I did have sex with him, but I couldn't continue having sex with him. 837 00:44:56,585 --> 00:44:58,457 mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 838 00:45:00,023 --> 00:45:02,504 and now I'm supposed to ask why, I suppose. 839 00:45:02,504 --> 00:45:04,637 Um, what happened? 840 00:45:04,637 --> 00:45:08,380 - He couldn't get it up or what - No, no, no. 841 00:45:08,380 --> 00:45:10,338 He was too big. 842 00:45:11,948 --> 00:45:14,951 - Excuse me? - Too big. 843 00:45:14,951 --> 00:45:18,041 That's nice. That's a charming bit of dinner conversation. 844 00:45:18,041 --> 00:45:20,870 Could we have the check please? You said you weren't going to get mad! 845 00:45:20,870 --> 00:45:23,699 I'm not. I just don't feel like sitting here, talking to you about your old boyfriends... 846 00:45:23,699 --> 00:45:28,182 Who have much bigger cocks than i do. - Ah, shh. 847 00:45:28,182 --> 00:45:30,445 - Don't be mad. - Why wouldn't I be mad? 848 00:45:30,445 --> 00:45:33,709 Would you like me to sit here and talk about my old girlfriends' vaginas? 849 00:45:33,709 --> 00:45:37,278 - You have a very nice-sized one, though. - A nice size? 850 00:45:37,278 --> 00:45:39,149 That's very nice of you. Thanks a lot. 851 00:45:39,149 --> 00:45:41,587 But not like big dick Dongo over there. 852 00:45:41,587 --> 00:45:44,372 Could we have that check? How we doin' with that check? 853 00:45:47,506 --> 00:45:49,464 Was it serious with that guy or what? 854 00:45:49,464 --> 00:45:51,510 It was just a fling. 855 00:45:51,510 --> 00:45:53,512 - Just a fling? - Yeah. 856 00:45:53,512 --> 00:45:57,124 It was for fun. It was strictly physical. 857 00:45:57,124 --> 00:46:01,476 Oh, it was just phys-- That's supposed to make me feel better? 858 00:46:01,476 --> 00:46:05,480 - Why are you doing this? You don't want to know. - I do want to know. 859 00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:08,483 So, what, he and his big cock were just for fun? is that-- 860 00:46:08,483 --> 00:46:12,226 - There's no reason for you to feel threatened. - I don't feel threatened. 861 00:46:12,226 --> 00:46:14,489 - Honey, I love you. - Uh-huh. 862 00:46:14,489 --> 00:46:16,970 - I didn't love him. - Uh-huh. 863 00:46:16,970 --> 00:46:19,364 Plus, you can't get on my case 'cause you're gonna go home... 864 00:46:19,364 --> 00:46:22,497 And get in bed with your wife. 865 00:46:22,497 --> 00:46:27,328 - Do you think he's a better lover than me? - No. 866 00:46:27,328 --> 00:46:29,504 No, i'm just wondering. 867 00:46:29,504 --> 00:46:32,377 Maybe that could be the problem we've been having lately. I'm serious. 868 00:46:32,377 --> 00:46:36,076 Maybe you need like a huge cock to make you happy. 869 00:46:36,076 --> 00:46:38,557 You think that's the problem we've been having lately? 870 00:46:38,557 --> 00:46:42,256 The problem is that you're married, and we've been together for, what, six months. 871 00:46:42,256 --> 00:46:46,565 This is the first night you took me out on a real date. That is the problem! 872 00:46:46,565 --> 00:46:49,394 How much bigger is he than me? That's all i wanna know. 873 00:46:49,394 --> 00:46:52,135 Get off it, will you? 874 00:46:52,135 --> 00:46:56,314 - This was nice. please leave it be, okay? - mm-hmm. sure. 875 00:46:59,055 --> 00:47:01,841 Hi, babe. 876 00:47:01,841 --> 00:47:04,496 Are you here? 877 00:47:04,496 --> 00:47:06,933 - Hi. - Hi. 878 00:47:09,849 --> 00:47:12,895 - How are you? - Ooh, flowers! what's the occasion? 879 00:47:12,895 --> 00:47:16,769 I need an occasion to buy flowers for my wife? 880 00:47:16,769 --> 00:47:20,555 Usually. Here, I'll put 'em-- 881 00:47:20,555 --> 00:47:23,123 - Where were you all night? - I was at the gym. 882 00:47:23,123 --> 00:47:25,125 I told you I was gonna go to the gym. 883 00:47:25,125 --> 00:47:29,564 I decided to go for a swim afterwards, then i ran into-- 884 00:47:29,564 --> 00:47:32,045 What's that smell? 885 00:47:32,045 --> 00:47:36,310 - What? What smell? - I guess it's your new cologne? 886 00:47:36,310 --> 00:47:38,530 Yeah. You don't like it? 887 00:47:38,530 --> 00:47:41,271 No. It's kind of flowery. 888 00:47:41,271 --> 00:47:44,971 Oh, well-- maybe it's the flowers. 889 00:47:44,971 --> 00:47:48,496 - I'm gonna go to bed. - What, are you going to bed? 890 00:47:52,892 --> 00:47:57,549 At the gym tonight I was looking through one of those, um, 891 00:47:57,549 --> 00:48:00,508 You know, those men's magazines. 892 00:48:00,508 --> 00:48:04,904 And they had an article in there about penis size. 893 00:48:04,904 --> 00:48:09,038 Now, I know you've only been with a couple of guys. 894 00:48:09,038 --> 00:48:10,997 So you've told me. 895 00:48:10,997 --> 00:48:14,392 But, um, is mine, uh, 896 00:48:14,392 --> 00:48:18,439 What, like a nice size or-- 897 00:48:20,093 --> 00:48:22,487 I don't know. I've never compared. 898 00:48:22,487 --> 00:48:25,272 Would you describe it as big or-- 899 00:48:25,272 --> 00:48:27,187 I don't know. maybe. 900 00:48:27,187 --> 00:48:29,842 Is everything all right? 901 00:48:29,842 --> 00:48:32,192 - Yeah. - Why? 902 00:48:32,192 --> 00:48:34,977 You just seem different to me lately. 903 00:48:34,977 --> 00:48:37,632 What do you mean, "different"? what do you mean? 904 00:48:37,632 --> 00:48:42,332 Well, you're not as affectionate as you used to be. 905 00:48:42,332 --> 00:48:46,989 When we first got together, you could barely keep your hands off me. 906 00:48:46,989 --> 00:48:50,645 And now, we barely make love. 907 00:48:50,645 --> 00:48:54,780 And we never just lay around and cuddle. 908 00:48:54,780 --> 00:48:57,304 I know, honey, but I'm sorry. 909 00:48:57,304 --> 00:49:00,612 I'm so busy at work, and I'm just-- 910 00:49:00,612 --> 00:49:03,571 After a while, things do slow down. That's-- 911 00:49:03,571 --> 00:49:06,879 But not for everyone, and i don't want them to slow down for us. 912 00:49:06,879 --> 00:49:08,924 Why should they? I'm 30 years old. 913 00:49:08,924 --> 00:49:12,319 I'm not ready to not have passion in my life! 914 00:49:12,319 --> 00:49:15,844 I know, no--i got married 'cause I wanted to have kids, 915 00:49:15,844 --> 00:49:18,673 And love and companionship. 916 00:49:18,673 --> 00:49:20,893 And the longer we're together, the less... 917 00:49:20,893 --> 00:49:24,374 I seem to be getting these things. 918 00:49:24,374 --> 00:49:26,812 So this is about kids? 919 00:49:26,812 --> 00:49:29,031 No. Yeah, it is about kids, 920 00:49:29,031 --> 00:49:31,294 But it's really more about us. 921 00:49:32,905 --> 00:49:35,647 Well, honey, I-- I don't want to say anything, 922 00:49:35,647 --> 00:49:38,214 But compared to most people, we have a great marriage. 923 00:49:38,214 --> 00:49:39,694 That's what I think. 924 00:49:39,694 --> 00:49:43,045 Oh, god. 925 00:49:43,045 --> 00:49:46,396 - What? - Why don't you give me any attention anymore? 926 00:49:46,396 --> 00:49:50,618 - Why am I your last priority? - what are you talking about? 927 00:49:50,618 --> 00:49:54,100 I got you flowers and-- 928 00:49:54,100 --> 00:49:58,147 Honey, come on. 929 00:49:58,147 --> 00:50:00,323 Griffin and I have been happily married for six years. 930 00:50:00,323 --> 00:50:03,457 And I would say that our sex life is healthy. 931 00:50:03,457 --> 00:50:07,766 You know, it slowed down a little bit, but we're still passionate. 932 00:50:07,766 --> 00:50:11,987 It's not really the sex I miss so much as the affection. 933 00:50:11,987 --> 00:50:14,076 Annie described your sex life as passionate. 934 00:50:14,076 --> 00:50:16,992 Would you say that was accurate? 935 00:50:16,992 --> 00:50:20,474 No, I would not describe it as passionate, no. I would not, no. 936 00:50:20,474 --> 00:50:25,914 Look, after a certain amount of time, things fade. 937 00:50:25,914 --> 00:50:29,744 And anybody who tells you differently is lying. 938 00:50:29,744 --> 00:50:33,052 If you really think that, then why don't you say something? 939 00:50:33,052 --> 00:50:35,837 - What should i say? - I don't know. 940 00:50:35,837 --> 00:50:39,493 I never liked the guy, so i would say something like, 941 00:50:39,493 --> 00:50:43,845 "I think you're a selfish, ignorant misogynist. 942 00:50:43,845 --> 00:50:46,935 I know you're having an affair, and I want a divorce." 943 00:50:46,935 --> 00:50:49,068 Who said anything about a divorce? 944 00:50:49,068 --> 00:50:52,462 You said he came home smelling of some other woman's pussy. 945 00:50:52,462 --> 00:50:54,508 Perfume! I said perfume! 946 00:50:54,508 --> 00:50:56,815 Perfume, pussy, whatever. whatever. look. 947 00:50:56,815 --> 00:51:00,470 I know when a guy is having an affair, and that's what the little shit is doing. 948 00:51:00,470 --> 00:51:02,734 You've got a couple of options. 949 00:51:02,734 --> 00:51:05,606 You could divorce the prick. 950 00:51:05,606 --> 00:51:08,478 You could stay and live with it, 951 00:51:08,478 --> 00:51:10,480 But that's pathetic. 952 00:51:10,480 --> 00:51:13,309 or you could, um, 953 00:51:13,309 --> 00:51:15,921 Have an affair yourself. 954 00:51:15,921 --> 00:51:18,532 Do you think that Harry has ever had an affair? 955 00:51:18,532 --> 00:51:21,535 I think that's what that log cabin shit was about. 956 00:51:21,535 --> 00:51:24,190 Yeah, he wants a place to take them. 957 00:51:24,190 --> 00:51:26,540 Why do you stay with him, then? 958 00:51:26,540 --> 00:51:29,543 Or what? Get another divorce? 959 00:51:29,543 --> 00:51:32,067 No way. God, too much work. 960 00:51:32,067 --> 00:51:34,679 How can you stay with him knowing he's had an affair? 961 00:51:34,679 --> 00:51:37,769 I don't know. because... 962 00:51:37,769 --> 00:51:39,814 I did the same thing. 963 00:51:39,814 --> 00:51:43,383 You did? oh, my god! when? you did? 964 00:51:43,383 --> 00:51:47,169 - With my gyno. - Your gynecologist? 965 00:51:47,169 --> 00:51:50,390 Oh, my god! isn't that illegal or something? 966 00:51:50,390 --> 00:51:52,566 No. Are you kidding me? It's heaven. 967 00:51:52,566 --> 00:51:56,744 Think about it. If there's one thing that guy knows about-- 968 00:51:56,744 --> 00:51:59,138 What does he do? 969 00:51:59,138 --> 00:52:01,575 What does he do? 970 00:52:01,575 --> 00:52:03,533 Annie's problem is she's an idealist. 971 00:52:03,533 --> 00:52:06,319 She actually believes all that shit about... 972 00:52:06,319 --> 00:52:10,105 True love and living happily ever after. 973 00:52:10,105 --> 00:52:12,281 She really believes there are good guys out there. 974 00:52:12,281 --> 00:52:16,329 She just has to remember that, you know, men are like a disease. 975 00:52:16,329 --> 00:52:21,551 And, unfortunately, most of us have already been infected. 976 00:52:21,551 --> 00:52:24,467 And as far as i can tell, 977 00:52:27,209 --> 00:52:30,299 there's no cure. 978 00:52:30,299 --> 00:52:33,607 - Are you from New York originally? - Yeah, Queens. 979 00:52:33,607 --> 00:52:36,131 That's not really New York, is it? 980 00:52:36,131 --> 00:52:39,265 No, that's really New York. in fact, in my book... 981 00:52:39,265 --> 00:52:42,268 That's the real New York. 982 00:52:42,268 --> 00:52:46,185 Why? Where you from? The Upper East Side, born and raised. 983 00:52:46,185 --> 00:52:49,231 The Upper East Side? That's not really New York. 984 00:52:49,231 --> 00:52:52,931 - What does your dad do? A Wall Street guy? - He's a lawyer. 985 00:52:52,931 --> 00:52:56,674 So what does he have to do with making this a great city? 986 00:52:56,674 --> 00:52:59,415 We, on the other hand-- the bridge and tunnel crowd, 987 00:52:59,415 --> 00:53:02,201 The outer borough folk-- We're the ones that built this city. 988 00:53:02,201 --> 00:53:05,073 We gave our blood and guts to this town. like I have-- 989 00:53:05,073 --> 00:53:07,293 One of my grandfathers was a sand hog. 990 00:53:07,293 --> 00:53:09,643 Helped build the Lincoln and Holland tunnels. 991 00:53:09,643 --> 00:53:12,124 Ended up dying of emphysema from all the dust. 992 00:53:12,124 --> 00:53:15,562 I got another grandfather who worked construction on a dozen skyscrapers, 993 00:53:15,562 --> 00:53:17,651 Including The Empire State Building. 994 00:53:17,651 --> 00:53:20,175 Then he falls to his death when I'm a kid. 995 00:53:20,175 --> 00:53:23,396 My dad was a cop. got shot twice while on the job. 996 00:53:23,396 --> 00:53:25,267 My mom's a nurse at Harlem Hospital, 997 00:53:25,267 --> 00:53:27,487 Still saving lives every day. 998 00:53:27,487 --> 00:53:30,533 We really gave something to the city. 999 00:53:30,533 --> 00:53:33,493 Our blood, our guts, our lives. We're the ones that made it great. 1000 00:53:33,493 --> 00:53:36,844 That's a great story, but I can trace my ancestors back... 1001 00:53:36,844 --> 00:53:39,542 To the original dutch settlers in the 17th century. 1002 00:53:39,542 --> 00:53:41,806 and in my book, that's as real a New Yorker as you can get. 1003 00:53:41,806 --> 00:53:43,938 If you grew up in the outer boroughs, 1004 00:53:43,938 --> 00:53:47,507 You have a greater appreciation of New York than if you grew up in manhattan. 1005 00:53:47,507 --> 00:53:51,467 We grew up sort of seeing the city from a distance... 1006 00:53:51,467 --> 00:53:54,601 And feeling the pull of it, longing for it. 1007 00:53:54,601 --> 00:53:57,691 Maybe if you grew up here, you kind of take it for granted. 1008 00:53:57,691 --> 00:54:00,259 Jesus, you weren't kidding. this is a great space. 1009 00:54:00,259 --> 00:54:03,218 I thought you'd like it. Obviously it's a raw space. You'd have to build it out. 1010 00:54:03,218 --> 00:54:07,788 It'll cost you some money. I don't mean to be rude, but what do you do for a living? 1011 00:54:07,788 --> 00:54:12,880 I produce a television show-- Entertainment This Week. 1012 00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:18,277 - What do you do there? - We go around to movie premieres and television shows... 1013 00:54:18,277 --> 00:54:19,800 And then we interview all these asshole celebrities about like... 1014 00:54:19,800 --> 00:54:23,673 Who they're fucking and how much they're getting overpaid. 1015 00:54:23,673 --> 00:54:27,721 Then basically try and help them sell their latest piece of crap product. 1016 00:54:27,721 --> 00:54:30,419 - So you really like this job? - You know what it is? 1017 00:54:30,419 --> 00:54:32,378 When I got out of college, I wanted to be a writer. Thought I'd go into journalism... 1018 00:54:32,378 --> 00:54:34,772 Or maybe even be a novelist. 1019 00:54:34,772 --> 00:54:39,167 But the only job I could get was answering phones at the show. 1020 00:54:39,167 --> 00:54:42,780 So here it is, ten years later, I'm making a pile of dough... 1021 00:54:42,780 --> 00:54:46,827 And it's hard to imagine walking away even though I know, you know, 1022 00:54:46,827 --> 00:54:49,221 It'd be the best thing for me. 1023 00:54:49,221 --> 00:54:52,180 Sounds like my marriage. 1024 00:54:52,180 --> 00:54:55,575 So are you writing anything now? 1025 00:54:55,575 --> 00:54:59,100 No. You know, every time I try and get started... 1026 00:54:59,100 --> 00:55:02,147 Something comes up from work and I just get distracted. 1027 00:55:02,147 --> 00:55:05,628 Well, maybe one day I'll be in barnes and noble and I'll see one of your books... 1028 00:55:05,628 --> 00:55:07,674 And I'll pick it up. 1029 00:55:10,155 --> 00:55:11,939 That'd be nice. 1030 00:55:14,594 --> 00:55:20,339 So anyway, there's this view over here I really want you to see. 1031 00:55:20,339 --> 00:55:24,125 So I'm beginning to think you're not really looking for an apartment. 1032 00:55:24,125 --> 00:55:28,564 What do you think? You think I'm just using this as an excuse to flirt with you? 1033 00:55:28,564 --> 00:55:31,654 - Are you flirting with me? - I was hoping it was obvious, 1034 00:55:31,654 --> 00:55:33,918 But I guess I'm not doing that good a job. 1035 00:55:33,918 --> 00:55:37,269 You did say you were married I think, right? - Yeah. 1036 00:55:37,269 --> 00:55:40,489 Well, that sucks. I shouldn't be flirting with you if you're married. 1037 00:55:40,489 --> 00:55:43,449 - No, you shouldn't. Yeah. - So-- 1038 00:55:43,449 --> 00:55:47,322 Well, I should get going. I gotta get back to the office. 1039 00:55:47,322 --> 00:55:49,498 But if I see anything, I'll call you. 1040 00:55:49,498 --> 00:55:51,674 Yeah, no-- 'cause you know-- all right. 1041 00:55:51,674 --> 00:55:53,981 - Okay, bye. - Call me, though. 1042 00:55:59,813 --> 00:56:04,600 So I am going out with the guy from the video store again tonight. 1043 00:56:04,600 --> 00:56:07,560 Oh, second date. pressure's on. 1044 00:56:07,560 --> 00:56:09,867 So, you gonna have sex with him? 1045 00:56:09,867 --> 00:56:12,913 I don't know. what? do you think I should? 1046 00:56:12,913 --> 00:56:15,873 I definitely think you should. But this time, give him a little advice. 1047 00:56:15,873 --> 00:56:18,876 No more cologne on the balls. 1048 00:56:18,876 --> 00:56:20,965 Come on. It wasn't that bad. 1049 00:56:20,965 --> 00:56:24,664 No, it was disgusting. 1050 00:56:24,664 --> 00:56:27,580 How many sexual partners have you had in your life? 1051 00:56:27,580 --> 00:56:30,322 Not entirely enough. 1052 00:56:30,322 --> 00:56:33,499 But I'm working on it. right now, that's what I'm working on. 1053 00:56:33,499 --> 00:56:35,849 I think it's... Seven. 1054 00:56:35,849 --> 00:56:38,199 Eight. Is that bad? 1055 00:56:38,199 --> 00:56:40,985 I'm 19. that sounds really bad. 1056 00:56:40,985 --> 00:56:44,118 What, are you kidding me? I'm a 39-year-old man. 1057 00:56:44,118 --> 00:56:47,382 Wow can I possibly remember? I don't know. 1058 00:56:47,382 --> 00:56:49,645 A hundred? Two hundred and 50? 1059 00:56:49,645 --> 00:56:51,691 I don't know. I mean, you know. 1060 00:56:51,691 --> 00:56:54,694 That's the great thing about New York. You walk down the street, 1061 00:56:54,694 --> 00:57:00,091 And you encounter like a thousand potential sexual partners every day. 1062 00:57:00,091 --> 00:57:02,180 A walk to the deli can be very erotic. 1063 00:57:02,180 --> 00:57:05,139 I know it sounds pathetic, but I've had three. 1064 00:57:05,139 --> 00:57:08,403 I got married early. I was 22 years old. 1065 00:57:08,403 --> 00:57:12,712 But, you know, one of them was-- is my husband. 1066 00:57:12,712 --> 00:57:16,107 Not too many. I don't know. like nine or ten. 1067 00:57:16,107 --> 00:57:20,589 I was always one of those guys that's kind of been in a series of long-term relationships. 1068 00:57:20,589 --> 00:57:25,377 So, uh, I never really had the opportunity to put up the big numbers. 1069 00:57:25,377 --> 00:57:29,120 Seventeen. But, you know, there was no one-night stands or anything. 1070 00:57:29,120 --> 00:57:32,384 I just dated a lot. so-- 1071 00:57:34,995 --> 00:57:37,606 Oh, Jesus. 1072 00:57:37,606 --> 00:57:42,133 - That's the greeting I get now? - If I find you outside my door, yes. What are you doing here? 1073 00:57:42,133 --> 00:57:45,440 - It's not like I'm stalking you or something. - Yes, it is. 1074 00:57:45,440 --> 00:57:48,443 I can't find my keys. I gave you a spare set. 1075 00:57:48,443 --> 00:57:50,968 I thought for emergencies like this-- 1076 00:57:50,968 --> 00:57:54,623 Okay. Hold on, I'll get them. I should have seen that coming a mile away. 1077 00:57:54,623 --> 00:57:57,148 Aren't you going to introduce me to your new friend here? 1078 00:57:57,148 --> 00:58:01,848 Tommy, this is my ex-husband, Benjamin. Ben, this is Tommy. - How you doing, man? 1079 00:58:01,848 --> 00:58:03,981 I'm doing good. I'm good. 1080 00:58:03,981 --> 00:58:06,070 That's a nice jacket. - Thanks. 1081 00:58:06,070 --> 00:58:08,811 Can I talk to you for a second in private? - No. 1082 00:58:08,811 --> 00:58:12,511 Maria, this is very important. we have some talking to do. - No. 1083 00:58:12,511 --> 00:58:16,080 You must have me confused with someone who thinks they have to explain themselves to you. 1084 00:58:16,080 --> 00:58:19,822 Look, pal, will you give us a second here in private? She'll be right back. 1085 00:58:19,822 --> 00:58:23,522 No, Benjamin, No. if you want to talk to me, we can do it out here. 1086 00:58:23,522 --> 00:58:26,220 Otherwise, I'll go get your keys and you can call me in the morning. 1087 00:58:26,220 --> 00:58:29,180 I'll wait out here. 1088 00:58:29,180 --> 00:58:31,921 Tommy, would you like to come inside? 1089 00:58:31,921 --> 00:58:35,490 No, I'll wait out here with my, uh-- my pal. 1090 00:58:35,490 --> 00:58:38,450 Get to know him. - Fine. 1091 00:58:49,504 --> 00:58:54,248 So, uh, where are you, uh-- where are you located? 1092 00:58:54,248 --> 00:58:56,598 I'll call you tomorrow. 1093 00:58:58,426 --> 00:59:00,733 You're welcome, Benjamin. - Thanks. 1094 00:59:02,952 --> 00:59:04,780 I'm so sorry. 1095 00:59:13,659 --> 00:59:16,879 Look, you don't have any diseases that I should know about, right? 1096 00:59:19,578 --> 00:59:24,061 No. why? you got any diseases I should know about? 1097 00:59:24,061 --> 00:59:26,846 - No. - Are you sure? 1098 00:59:28,848 --> 00:59:31,546 I swear. are you sure? 1099 00:59:31,546 --> 00:59:34,375 Yeah, I'm sure. I just had a test. 1100 00:59:36,638 --> 00:59:38,640 Well, that's good. 1101 00:59:41,513 --> 00:59:45,952 You know, you really should have thought to bring a condom, though. 1102 00:59:45,952 --> 00:59:49,608 Look, I'm sorry. I just-- 1103 00:59:49,608 --> 00:59:53,220 It was only the second date. I didn't honestly think we'd get this far. 1104 00:59:57,006 --> 00:59:58,921 Yeah, well-- 1105 01:00:01,533 --> 01:00:06,625 I'm really sorry to have to hurry you like this this morning but i've got to get to work. 1106 01:00:06,625 --> 01:00:09,671 What do you mean you got to get to work? I thought you said you were a schoolteacher. 1107 01:00:09,671 --> 01:00:13,197 - Yeah, so? - Well, today's Sunday, right? 1108 01:00:13,197 --> 01:00:15,590 Yeah, well-- 1109 01:00:15,590 --> 01:00:18,463 I'm taking the class on a school trip, 1110 01:00:18,463 --> 01:00:22,815 And we're going to the zoo, so--huh. 1111 01:00:25,209 --> 01:00:28,299 Why don't you take this one and i'll wait for the next one? 1112 01:00:28,299 --> 01:00:31,693 No, no, no. I can't do that. you said you gotta get to work, right? so-- 1113 01:00:31,693 --> 01:00:35,871 - Don't worry about it. - Come on. You got the kids waiting, right? 1114 01:00:35,871 --> 01:00:38,744 - I'll get the next one. - All right. I'll see you around. 1115 01:00:50,103 --> 01:00:54,194 With Maria, you know, quite honestly, I don't know what happened. 1116 01:00:54,194 --> 01:00:57,458 Went out a couple times. I thought we had a good time. I mean-- 1117 01:00:57,458 --> 01:01:01,158 Obviously, we must've. We had sex the second time we went out. 1118 01:01:01,158 --> 01:01:04,073 I think I just got a little freaked out sleeping with another guy. 1119 01:01:04,073 --> 01:01:07,816 It's not like I didn't like him. It's just that i hadn't slept with anyone since Benjamin. 1120 01:01:07,816 --> 01:01:09,644 It just got me a little scared. 1121 01:01:09,644 --> 01:01:12,952 After that, she tried to kick me out of the house. 1122 01:01:12,952 --> 01:01:18,262 I called her a bunch of times. she never called me back. I got the hint and stopped calling. 1123 01:01:18,262 --> 01:01:21,395 How did you feel when you saw Maria and Tommy together? 1124 01:01:21,395 --> 01:01:24,442 Who, my pal? My pal Tommy. Yeah. It's terrible. 1125 01:01:24,442 --> 01:01:28,010 She'd let a guy like that into her home. That's the apartment I shared with her. 1126 01:01:28,010 --> 01:01:31,927 To think that that guy was showering under the shower head that i installed... 1127 01:01:31,927 --> 01:01:34,495 Makes me very angry. 1128 01:01:34,495 --> 01:01:37,281 You actually pay attention to your horoscope? - I read it every day. 1129 01:01:37,281 --> 01:01:40,501 - It's actually pretty accurate. - Accurate? In what way? 1130 01:01:40,501 --> 01:01:43,504 It keys me into what to watch out for in life. 1131 01:01:43,504 --> 01:01:46,812 Why I may be feeling a particular way on a certain day. 1132 01:01:46,812 --> 01:01:50,119 What did today's tell you? let's see what it says. 1133 01:01:50,119 --> 01:01:52,818 All right. It says-- Yeah, right. 1134 01:01:52,818 --> 01:01:57,431 "You have had your fill of certain people. Make a clean break. 1135 01:01:57,431 --> 01:02:00,304 "There are, however, changes in the air. 1136 01:02:00,304 --> 01:02:04,786 A person in uniform could deliver the key to your love life and happiness." 1137 01:02:04,786 --> 01:02:07,311 Get the fuck out of here. it says that? 1138 01:02:07,311 --> 01:02:10,139 - Yeah. - Oh, that's me! 1139 01:02:10,139 --> 01:02:14,056 That is me. that's me. I am the man in the uniform... 1140 01:02:14,056 --> 01:02:18,104 That can deliver the key to your love life and happiness. 1141 01:02:18,104 --> 01:02:20,759 I wear a uniform. 1142 01:02:20,759 --> 01:02:24,066 Unless it's your mailman. what kind of relationship do you have with him? 1143 01:02:24,066 --> 01:02:26,982 Her. So you don't have to worry. 1144 01:02:26,982 --> 01:02:30,986 You know what? No, no, no. you said you don't buy into the whole astrology thing. 1145 01:02:30,986 --> 01:02:34,033 So therefore, this does not apply to us. - I never said that-- 1146 01:02:34,033 --> 01:02:37,515 - Oh, yes, you did. - I never said that I didn't buy into astrology. 1147 01:02:37,515 --> 01:02:40,866 I said I was a little suspect of it. What is this, the daily news? 1148 01:02:40,866 --> 01:02:43,303 - Yeah. - I'm sure it's a very accurate reading. 1149 01:02:43,303 --> 01:02:47,264 It's good stuff. What does it say? that you should make a "clean break." 1150 01:02:47,264 --> 01:02:50,092 see that? What do you think about that part of it? 1151 01:02:50,092 --> 01:02:53,792 Like I said, it helps me make decisions. 1152 01:02:53,792 --> 01:02:57,535 How did you end up with this guy that you're with anyway? 1153 01:02:57,535 --> 01:03:01,016 The man is married. he's a dentist, right? - Right. 1154 01:03:01,016 --> 01:03:05,456 He's also a hundred years old, so he's got three major strikes against him. 1155 01:03:05,456 --> 01:03:08,328 In my eyes, three strikes, you're out. You know what i mean? 1156 01:03:08,328 --> 01:03:11,157 Yeah, I know what you mean. 1157 01:03:11,157 --> 01:03:14,987 It was just really simple. I was just sitting in the park one day by school. 1158 01:03:14,987 --> 01:03:17,903 - He came up to me and he hit on me. - Are you a model? 1159 01:03:19,905 --> 01:03:24,605 If I were a model, why would I be sitting here studying right now? 1160 01:03:24,605 --> 01:03:28,566 That's very funny. well, you should be if you're not because you're very beautiful. 1161 01:03:28,566 --> 01:03:32,483 You have a very different look. You're not a classic beauty. 1162 01:03:32,483 --> 01:03:35,181 I think you have the look of the new millennium. 1163 01:03:35,181 --> 01:03:38,576 - "the look of the new millennium"? - Yeah, yeah. 1164 01:03:38,576 --> 01:03:41,492 - You are kidding, right? - No, i'm not kidding. I'm serious. 1165 01:03:41,492 --> 01:03:43,885 - Yeah? - Yeah, I think you do. look. 1166 01:03:43,885 --> 01:03:46,453 Look at your nose. You have a beautiful nose. 1167 01:03:46,453 --> 01:03:49,151 - I had it fixed when i was 13. - Really? 1168 01:03:49,151 --> 01:03:51,763 They did a great job-- a great job. - Thanks. 1169 01:03:51,763 --> 01:03:55,027 Wonderful. I'm Griffin, by the way. 1170 01:03:55,027 --> 01:03:58,465 - Ashley. - Nice to meet you, Ashley. beautiful name. 1171 01:03:58,465 --> 01:04:02,382 So what do you say? Will you let me take you out sometime or-- 1172 01:04:02,382 --> 01:04:05,124 Are you married? Married? Why do you say that? 1173 01:04:05,124 --> 01:04:07,953 Where do you get that from that I'm married? 1174 01:04:07,953 --> 01:04:11,652 - Because you have a ring on your finger. Isn't that a ring? - Technically, I'm married. 1175 01:04:11,652 --> 01:04:14,176 I'm not really married. No. Oh. 1176 01:04:14,176 --> 01:04:16,614 We have an understanding. 1177 01:04:16,614 --> 01:04:20,835 So is this understanding between you and your wife or you and your dick? 1178 01:04:22,533 --> 01:04:24,578 That's very funny. That's very funny. 1179 01:04:24,578 --> 01:04:26,667 The man is, what, 39 years old? 1180 01:04:26,667 --> 01:04:28,930 How old are you? - Nineteen. 1181 01:04:28,930 --> 01:04:32,499 When you were in fifth grade, he was 32. 1182 01:04:32,499 --> 01:04:36,460 Or like when he was my age, you were just being born - Yeah, i know. 1183 01:04:36,460 --> 01:04:38,636 Or like when, let's say-- 1184 01:04:38,636 --> 01:04:43,989 I get the point. you have to admit, as you get older, the age gap does shorten. 1185 01:04:43,989 --> 01:04:47,514 Maybe if you were 60 and he was 80, it wouldn't seem so weird. 1186 01:04:47,514 --> 01:04:52,040 But, honestly, I thought he was your father. I bet a lot of people think that. 1187 01:04:52,040 --> 01:04:55,653 You know, we don't really go out a whole lot in public. 1188 01:04:55,653 --> 01:04:58,786 But you'd be surprised. Most young girls do wanna go for older guys... 1189 01:04:58,786 --> 01:05:02,877 Because most young guys, they just wanna screw as many girls as possible. 1190 01:05:02,877 --> 01:05:05,184 They don't want a commitment. They just want a lot of conquests. 1191 01:05:05,184 --> 01:05:07,665 Here you go. 1192 01:05:07,665 --> 01:05:10,972 what kind of commitment does a married guy give you? 1193 01:05:15,020 --> 01:05:17,239 So what would I be to you? 1194 01:05:17,239 --> 01:05:20,634 What, just another notch on your belt? 1195 01:05:20,634 --> 01:05:23,681 Ashley, are you-- are you kidding me? 1196 01:05:23,681 --> 01:05:27,685 Are you crazy? do you know that I would marry you? 1197 01:05:27,685 --> 01:05:31,515 I would marry you today if you say yes to me. I swear. 1198 01:05:31,515 --> 01:05:35,301 No. Come on. Let me take you out on a date. great time. 1199 01:05:35,301 --> 01:05:38,217 I'm the man in the uniform, you know. 1200 01:05:40,175 --> 01:05:42,090 What do you say, please? 1201 01:05:47,531 --> 01:05:49,446 Yeah, really? - Okay. 1202 01:05:52,971 --> 01:05:55,277 Why are you wearing handcuffs? 1203 01:05:55,277 --> 01:05:58,890 Crazy girl, bad breath, no sex and she lost the key. 1204 01:05:58,890 --> 01:06:02,763 That's not good. No. No, that's not good. That's not good at all. 1205 01:06:02,763 --> 01:06:06,593 What about you? You still chasing after that waitress who is so way beyond your league? 1206 01:06:06,593 --> 01:06:09,770 As a matter of fact, I have a date with her this weekend. 1207 01:06:09,770 --> 01:06:14,775 That's great. No, I'm happy for you. Douche bag. 1208 01:06:14,775 --> 01:06:18,605 ♪ Crazy girl bad breath, no sex ♪ - Don't. 1209 01:06:18,605 --> 01:06:22,391 ♪ And she lost the key ♪ - Don't push my buttons. I'm really right here. 1210 01:06:22,391 --> 01:06:25,786 I don't know if he has a problem, but i gotta tell you, after his divorce, 1211 01:06:25,786 --> 01:06:28,354 He was like fucked up in the head, you know. 1212 01:06:28,354 --> 01:06:31,357 Like he wanted to screw everything that wasn't nailed down. 1213 01:06:31,357 --> 01:06:34,055 But that's not Ben. 1214 01:06:34,055 --> 01:06:38,538 Ben, really, he wants to be in a monogamous relationship. 1215 01:06:38,538 --> 01:06:40,584 I hope it works out with that waitress. 1216 01:06:42,107 --> 01:06:44,588 This is very upsetting. 1217 01:06:44,588 --> 01:06:48,069 These are some classic albums you're rejecting. What are you doing? 1218 01:06:48,069 --> 01:06:51,986 How do you not know these albums? These are records that shaped rock and roll. 1219 01:06:51,986 --> 01:06:57,470 Shaped the world we live in. - I don't listen to this kind of music. This is your kind. 1220 01:06:57,470 --> 01:07:01,822 These guys, they're dead. They're all dead. They were dead before I was even born. 1221 01:07:01,822 --> 01:07:06,740 Morrison and Hendrix, yeah. But like The Rolling Stones, like only one guy died. 1222 01:07:06,740 --> 01:07:10,788 Really early on in The Rolling Stones. They replaced him and they were still great. 1223 01:07:10,788 --> 01:07:16,358 I think that the most mandatory album, if we're gonna start a record collection for you, 1224 01:07:16,358 --> 01:07:18,447 is Exile On Main Street. 1225 01:07:18,447 --> 01:07:21,233 This is a no-brainer. - Okay. 1226 01:07:21,233 --> 01:07:25,411 And-and, like-- we're gonna have to get some Zeppelin for you... 1227 01:07:25,411 --> 01:07:27,456 Because otherwise-- 1228 01:07:27,456 --> 01:07:30,982 Zeppelin I. this is possibly the greatest-- 1229 01:07:30,982 --> 01:07:34,812 No, it is possibly the greatest debut album of all time. 1230 01:07:34,812 --> 01:07:37,597 Except of course Greetings From Asbury Park. 1231 01:07:37,597 --> 01:07:41,296 You have to have this. okay? - New Jersey. 1232 01:07:41,296 --> 01:07:43,821 You're good. you're set. you're so good now. Okay, I-- 1233 01:07:43,821 --> 01:07:46,867 Are you sure I'm gonna like these? There's like 80 zillion records in here. 1234 01:07:46,867 --> 01:07:51,002 I am positive. Honestly, if you don't like these, you have problems. 1235 01:07:51,002 --> 01:07:54,745 We're gonna have problems here. If you can't see the beauty and like the poetry... 1236 01:07:54,745 --> 01:08:00,228 And the majesty and... Like the brilliance of these albums, 1237 01:08:00,228 --> 01:08:02,535 Then I don't know-- I don't know what's wrong with you. 1238 01:08:02,535 --> 01:08:07,496 You have a deficiency in your soul or something. No, I'm only kidding. 1239 01:08:07,496 --> 01:08:10,412 Can I be honest with you? - I hope you're always honest with me. 1240 01:08:10,412 --> 01:08:14,416 I am. I am, totally. But I think that this is really important. 1241 01:08:14,416 --> 01:08:17,506 I think you're the most beautiful woman I've ever known. 1242 01:08:17,506 --> 01:08:19,987 You're kind. You're so sweet. 1243 01:08:19,987 --> 01:08:23,817 I don't know. I think I'm falling in love with you. - Benny, you're sweet. 1244 01:08:23,817 --> 01:08:26,515 - Sweet, sweet, sweet. You are. - I'm sweet. 1245 01:08:26,515 --> 01:08:29,562 - I'm not really that sweet. I'm really a savage. - Oh, really? 1246 01:08:29,562 --> 01:08:33,522 I'm a fucking wild man. You just have to let me show you that side of myself. 1247 01:08:33,522 --> 01:08:38,527 No, no, no. I like the sweet side. I know enough savages already. 1248 01:08:38,527 --> 01:08:42,488 Yeah. Yeah, but I'm a savage with a very sweet side. 1249 01:08:44,359 --> 01:08:46,274 Yeah? 1250 01:08:55,544 --> 01:08:59,113 Plus, I'm the man in the uniform. all right? 1251 01:08:59,113 --> 01:09:01,028 Yeah. 1252 01:09:02,551 --> 01:09:04,989 I told you that I would make more time for you. 1253 01:09:04,989 --> 01:09:08,557 I took you out to dinner, didn't I? - It's not that. 1254 01:09:08,557 --> 01:09:10,951 It's just that I'm not happy anymore. 1255 01:09:10,951 --> 01:09:13,693 What do you want me to do? I-I-I cannot get a divorce. 1256 01:09:13,693 --> 01:09:15,913 I don't want you to do anything. 1257 01:09:15,913 --> 01:09:19,612 I just don't want to be with you anymore. - Did you meet somebody else? 1258 01:09:19,612 --> 01:09:22,354 No. Come on. Who is it? Who's the guy? 1259 01:09:22,354 --> 01:09:25,270 What'd you meet, some other guy with a big cock or something? 1260 01:09:25,270 --> 01:09:29,013 - Nobody you'd know. - Oh, so there is somebody else. What is he? 1261 01:09:29,013 --> 01:09:31,624 Some little kid that you go walking in the park with. 1262 01:09:31,624 --> 01:09:34,540 You hold his hand and go to the movies with... 1263 01:09:34,540 --> 01:09:37,499 And then you hold his huge cock in the movie, is that what happens? 1264 01:09:37,499 --> 01:09:40,198 Griffin, I really don't think you're in a position to tell people... 1265 01:09:40,198 --> 01:09:43,767 What they can and can't do or who they can and can't be with, okay? 1266 01:09:43,767 --> 01:09:46,073 My position is a little different, all right? 1267 01:09:46,073 --> 01:09:48,554 I just can't stop seeing my wife. 1268 01:09:54,473 --> 01:09:56,257 You're gonna regret this. - Maybe? 1269 01:09:56,257 --> 01:09:58,433 But i doubt it. 1270 01:10:01,698 --> 01:10:04,004 Everything all right, Griff? 1271 01:10:05,963 --> 01:10:09,053 What do you think? That little girl is driving me crazy. 1272 01:10:09,053 --> 01:10:11,142 Why do you keep doing this to yourself? 1273 01:10:11,142 --> 01:10:15,450 How many girls do you have to screw before you realize you can get laid? 1274 01:10:18,540 --> 01:10:23,197 That's great. I don't think the patient in the back room heard you. 1275 01:10:23,197 --> 01:10:26,374 What was that? - Nothing. 1276 01:10:26,374 --> 01:10:31,815 Doctor? Doctor. - I'll be right there, Mrs. Bass. 1277 01:10:31,815 --> 01:10:33,991 Do me a favor, Carol. 1278 01:10:33,991 --> 01:10:38,647 Send one dozen flowers to the Washington Square street address with a note... 1279 01:10:38,647 --> 01:10:43,304 That says, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. What can I do?" 1280 01:10:43,304 --> 01:10:46,220 Okay? - Where's my flowers? 1281 01:10:46,220 --> 01:10:48,396 - Your flowers? - Yeah. 1282 01:10:49,876 --> 01:10:51,704 Don't start with me. Please don't. 1283 01:10:51,704 --> 01:10:56,535 Please. With you and then Sigmund Freud over there-- 1284 01:10:56,535 --> 01:10:58,537 - Doctor. - I'm coming, Mrs. Bass. 1285 01:10:58,537 --> 01:11:00,582 I'm ready for that extraction now. 1286 01:11:00,582 --> 01:11:02,846 Wait a second. What's wrong? 1287 01:11:02,846 --> 01:11:07,415 Okay. Nothing. Just move down. Move down a little lower. 1288 01:11:07,415 --> 01:11:09,809 There you go. Is that it? Yes. 1289 01:11:09,809 --> 01:11:12,769 No, you're not going in there. I'm not trying to go in there. 1290 01:11:12,769 --> 01:11:15,293 I could use a compass, though. 1291 01:11:15,293 --> 01:11:18,122 It's weird. I've never made love with a virgin before. 1292 01:11:18,122 --> 01:11:22,996 You're real cute. Seriously, let me enter because i'm about to splooge as it is. 1293 01:11:25,390 --> 01:11:28,567 Who the fuck is that? You gotta be kidding me? - Should i get it? 1294 01:11:28,567 --> 01:11:30,612 - No. - I'm gonna get it. 1295 01:11:30,612 --> 01:11:34,094 - Don't go get the door. Who in the fuck is this? - Could be important. 1296 01:11:41,101 --> 01:11:43,625 - Go away! - I wanna talk to you, Ash. 1297 01:11:43,625 --> 01:11:48,152 - I don't wanna talk to you. - well, too fucking bad about you. Let me in. Come on. 1298 01:11:48,152 --> 01:11:51,198 No. I'm busy. Get the fuck out. 1299 01:11:51,198 --> 01:11:55,594 What do you mean you're busy? What do you mean? You got that little queer boyfriend there? 1300 01:11:55,594 --> 01:11:58,902 Griffin, get the fuck away from the door! 1301 01:11:58,902 --> 01:12:02,166 You don't understand. I'm going to leave my wife. 1302 01:12:02,166 --> 01:12:05,169 - Can I tell you, Griffin, that I don't care? - What do you mean? 1303 01:12:05,169 --> 01:12:07,475 - I don't care. - You don't care? 1304 01:12:07,475 --> 01:12:12,785 You break up my marriage and you tell me you don't care? Open the fucking door! 1305 01:12:12,785 --> 01:12:15,744 - Open this fucking door! - I'm not opening the door! 1306 01:12:15,744 --> 01:12:18,660 Open the fucking door right now! who the fuck is in there with you? 1307 01:12:18,660 --> 01:12:21,750 Griffin, get away from the fucking door! - this is what you do? 1308 01:12:21,750 --> 01:12:25,580 This is what you want? After everything I've done for you, this is how you treat me? 1309 01:12:25,580 --> 01:12:27,408 That's nice. 1310 01:12:43,337 --> 01:12:45,383 Christ. 1311 01:12:45,383 --> 01:12:49,648 This building is like Sodom and Gomorrah tonight. 1312 01:12:49,648 --> 01:12:52,390 You girls need a hand over there? 1313 01:12:52,390 --> 01:12:55,306 Fuck off, scumbag. 1314 01:12:55,306 --> 01:12:57,177 Nice, nice. 1315 01:13:14,716 --> 01:13:17,502 Where have you been all night? - I was at the gym. 1316 01:13:17,502 --> 01:13:19,983 - Oh, again? - Yeah, yeah. 1317 01:13:24,248 --> 01:13:27,729 - Griffin, I have to talk to you. - What, honey? 1318 01:13:27,729 --> 01:13:32,212 Um, okay, this is hard for me to say because I'm afraid of what the answer might be, 1319 01:13:32,212 --> 01:13:37,087 But I just can't live my life feeling the way i'm feeling and not saying it. 1320 01:13:37,087 --> 01:13:40,699 - Okay. - Are you having an affair? 1321 01:13:40,699 --> 01:13:43,354 what? am I having an affair? 1322 01:13:43,354 --> 01:13:45,834 What-- Why would you say such a thing? 1323 01:13:45,834 --> 01:13:48,794 How can I not ask you? you're not available emotionally anymore. 1324 01:13:48,794 --> 01:13:52,711 You come home late some nights and you immediately take a shower. 1325 01:13:52,711 --> 01:13:56,149 We barely make love. you never talk about having kids. 1326 01:13:56,149 --> 01:13:59,718 You came home that one night, you smelled like perfume. 1327 01:13:59,718 --> 01:14:03,940 Sometimes I hear you having late-night phone conversations whispering. 1328 01:14:05,419 --> 01:14:08,509 Okay. All right. 1329 01:14:08,509 --> 01:14:12,557 I can understand from where you're sitting that it would seem like that. 1330 01:14:12,557 --> 01:14:15,734 But I have a good excuse for every single thing you said. 1331 01:14:15,734 --> 01:14:18,563 Number one: Lance is working my ass off at work. 1332 01:14:18,563 --> 01:14:20,782 So when I come home, I'm just tired. 1333 01:14:20,782 --> 01:14:24,134 And when i come home late, I come directly from the gym and I shower here... 1334 01:14:24,134 --> 01:14:27,267 Because you know I don't like to shower in front of other men. 1335 01:14:27,267 --> 01:14:30,792 As far as the perfume goes, I don't know what you're talking about. 1336 01:14:30,792 --> 01:14:34,318 I told you it was my cologne. If you don't want me to wear it, I'll get rid of it. 1337 01:14:34,318 --> 01:14:38,148 I'll never wear it again. And as far as the phone call goes, 1338 01:14:38,148 --> 01:14:42,282 I was probably talking to a friend of mine-- probably Harry about his goddamn sex life, 1339 01:14:42,282 --> 01:14:44,893 And I didn't wanna wake you up. 1340 01:14:44,893 --> 01:14:49,811 Why after six years of marriage are you suddenly so concerned about the size of your penis? 1341 01:14:49,811 --> 01:14:53,511 Because I read that article. I told you about the article I read... 1342 01:14:53,511 --> 01:14:56,166 In the magazine-- the men's magazine. 1343 01:14:56,166 --> 01:14:59,473 The average size of the penis is, you know-- 1344 01:14:59,473 --> 01:15:03,260 Are you fucking someone else? That's what i'm wondering. - Stop with that question! 1345 01:15:03,260 --> 01:15:07,264 You're feeling is it big enough? 'cause you never worried about that with me. 1346 01:15:07,264 --> 01:15:10,789 - I'm worried about it with you. - You don't seem worried. 1347 01:15:10,789 --> 01:15:14,140 - well, i am worried! if you were worried, then you'd come home right after work, 1348 01:15:14,140 --> 01:15:17,578 - I'm going to the gym. - Not three hours later and leave me sitting alone. 1349 01:15:17,578 --> 01:15:20,233 - I'm doing penis exercises. I'm joking. - That's really funny. 1350 01:15:20,233 --> 01:15:23,106 So you think everything seems normal? 1351 01:15:23,106 --> 01:15:27,762 I'm not saying everything seems normal. It seems like it is what i just told you. 1352 01:15:27,762 --> 01:15:30,504 Which is mostly I'm tired. 1353 01:15:30,504 --> 01:15:33,507 I won't go to the gym anymore. I just won't. 1354 01:15:33,507 --> 01:15:37,816 Forget it. I'll just come right home. 1355 01:15:37,816 --> 01:15:41,863 That's an indulgence that I give myself because it makes me feel better. 1356 01:15:41,863 --> 01:15:44,953 If you don't want me to do it, I won't do it. It's fine. Forget about it. 1357 01:15:44,953 --> 01:15:48,783 I'll wake up at 4:00 in the morning and exercise. - So are you happy? 1358 01:15:48,783 --> 01:15:51,003 Am I happy? I'm exhausted. 1359 01:15:51,003 --> 01:15:54,659 I'm exhausted, but other than that, I'm happy. 1360 01:15:54,659 --> 01:15:58,793 - You're really happy? - I'm not saying I'm really happy. 1361 01:15:58,793 --> 01:16:02,319 But i'm saying that i'm tired, you know. 1362 01:16:02,319 --> 01:16:04,582 I'm tired too. 1363 01:16:04,582 --> 01:16:08,064 Is it love or sex that makes us o confused in our relationships? 1364 01:16:08,064 --> 01:16:11,154 Well, I think that it's sex because, you know, 1365 01:16:11,154 --> 01:16:13,591 love is either there or it's not. 1366 01:16:13,591 --> 01:16:16,768 And i think sex can be tricky sometimes. 1367 01:16:16,768 --> 01:16:21,468 Is it love or sex that fucks us up? both. 1368 01:16:21,468 --> 01:16:23,992 maybe it's the love of sex that fucks us up. 1369 01:16:23,992 --> 01:16:26,430 - i don't know. - i don't know. I'm not screwed up. 1370 01:16:26,430 --> 01:16:30,521 I think people have a problem mixing up the two together and mistaking one for the other. 1371 01:16:30,521 --> 01:16:33,306 - I don't have that problem. - I don't know, you know. 1372 01:16:33,306 --> 01:16:35,091 I'm catholic, so probably sex. 1373 01:16:37,441 --> 01:16:40,357 Hey, you. What are you doin' here? - Hi. 1374 01:16:40,357 --> 01:16:42,837 How you doin'? Eh. How are you? 1375 01:16:42,837 --> 01:16:44,970 I'm good, I'm good. 1376 01:16:44,970 --> 01:16:47,712 What do you got there? - I heard it was good. 1377 01:16:47,712 --> 01:16:50,410 It's great. He's a terrific writer. 1378 01:16:53,935 --> 01:16:57,330 Is everything all right? You seem kind of a little down. 1379 01:16:57,330 --> 01:17:00,377 No. No, I just have a lot on my mind. 1380 01:17:00,377 --> 01:17:03,467 - Can i ask you a personal question? - Yeah, sure. 1381 01:17:03,467 --> 01:17:06,426 - You've had a long-term girlfriend, right? - Yeah. 1382 01:17:06,426 --> 01:17:08,863 Did you ever cheat on her? 1383 01:17:08,863 --> 01:17:12,563 Um, no. Not really. 1384 01:17:12,563 --> 01:17:16,436 What do you mean "not really"? either you did or you didn't, right? 1385 01:17:16,436 --> 01:17:20,179 well, define-- define "cheating." 1386 01:17:21,876 --> 01:17:24,183 Having sex with someone other than your girlfriend. 1387 01:17:24,183 --> 01:17:28,100 You mean sex, like in penetration? 1388 01:17:28,100 --> 01:17:32,974 So you may have kissed somebody, but you didn't actually have sex with them, or intercourse? 1389 01:17:34,628 --> 01:17:37,805 Uh, no, we definitely did not have, um, intercourse. 1390 01:17:37,805 --> 01:17:40,504 But we did kiss, so-- 1391 01:17:40,504 --> 01:17:44,247 Well, in my book, that is cheating. 1392 01:17:44,247 --> 01:17:48,860 Look, in my book too. I'm sorry it ever happened, but-- 1393 01:17:48,860 --> 01:17:53,125 Why did you do it? Were you not attracted to her anymore? 1394 01:17:53,125 --> 01:17:57,521 No. I don't think people cheat because they're not attracted to somebody anymore. 1395 01:17:57,521 --> 01:18:01,351 You cheat because you're not in love anymore. That's why you cheat. 1396 01:18:01,351 --> 01:18:04,223 I think my husband is having an affair. 1397 01:18:04,223 --> 01:18:06,921 Jesus. 1398 01:18:06,921 --> 01:18:09,054 Why do you think that? 1399 01:18:09,054 --> 01:18:13,450 - Little things. - Little things like what? 1400 01:18:13,450 --> 01:18:18,368 coming home late. a suspicious weekend meeting out of town. 1401 01:18:18,368 --> 01:18:21,980 Late-night phone calls where i hear him whispering. 1402 01:18:21,980 --> 01:18:26,463 One time he came home, he smelled like perfume. He said it was his new cologne. 1403 01:18:28,552 --> 01:18:31,816 And what, you only think he's having an affair? 1404 01:18:31,816 --> 01:18:35,559 I confronted him, and he denied it. But he can be very convincing. 1405 01:18:35,559 --> 01:18:38,518 - So are you even happy with this guy? - No. 1406 01:18:38,518 --> 01:18:40,651 Then why stay with him? 1407 01:18:40,651 --> 01:18:44,437 Even if he wasn't cheating on you, why stay in an unhappy marriage? 1408 01:18:44,437 --> 01:18:49,050 Um, I guess, you know, my parents got a divorce when i was a kid. 1409 01:18:49,050 --> 01:18:53,011 And I never forgave them for not trying harder to stay together. 1410 01:18:53,011 --> 01:18:55,796 I just didn't wanna be like them. I didn't wanna be that kind of person. 1411 01:18:55,796 --> 01:18:58,234 I think you gotta give yourself a break. 1412 01:18:58,234 --> 01:19:01,585 It's not your fault your husband's a scumbag. 1413 01:19:01,585 --> 01:19:05,458 I'm sorry to say that, but if he's cheating on you, he is. 1414 01:19:05,458 --> 01:19:08,766 I'm sure there's thousands of guys who would be dying to go out with you. 1415 01:19:08,766 --> 01:19:11,595 If you divorce this prick, you call me that day. 1416 01:19:11,595 --> 01:19:14,075 I'll jump on a plane no matter where I am in the country. 1417 01:19:14,075 --> 01:19:16,774 I'll fly back here. I'll take you out that night. 1418 01:19:16,774 --> 01:19:20,473 So you think I should go from an unfaithful husband to a guy who thinks... 1419 01:19:20,473 --> 01:19:23,737 That kissing a girl other than his girlfriend is not considered cheating? 1420 01:19:23,737 --> 01:19:28,220 It's not like I'm sitting here defending those actions. I know that was a scumbag thing to do. 1421 01:19:28,220 --> 01:19:30,353 - Would you do it again? - I know I wouldn't. 1422 01:19:30,353 --> 01:19:34,182 'cause i felt lousy when it happened. I was just being honest with you. 1423 01:19:34,182 --> 01:19:39,492 Well, you know, in my book, even talking like this is inappropriate. 1424 01:19:39,492 --> 01:19:41,929 So, I should get going. 1425 01:19:41,929 --> 01:19:45,498 - All right, I understand. - thank you for listening, though. 1426 01:19:45,498 --> 01:19:50,242 I'll see you, you know, next time we get an apartment to look at. 1427 01:19:50,242 --> 01:19:52,375 Bye. 1428 01:19:52,375 --> 01:19:54,942 Sometimes I think I'm really a priss. 1429 01:19:54,942 --> 01:19:58,119 My friends, they don't think cheating is such a big deal. 1430 01:19:58,119 --> 01:20:01,340 Maybe I'm too uptight in my views. But then, 1431 01:20:01,340 --> 01:20:05,953 I think these people would not be that deceitful to one of their friends. 1432 01:20:05,953 --> 01:20:07,781 People cheat 'cause they're afraid. 1433 01:20:07,781 --> 01:20:11,350 The world is run by fear, my friend. -Fear. 1434 01:20:11,350 --> 01:20:14,788 Everybody out here, they're afraid. That guy's afraid. You're afraid. 1435 01:20:14,788 --> 01:20:18,314 I'm gonna tell you something that my dad told me... 1436 01:20:18,314 --> 01:20:23,710 After I got divorced from my first wife, who was absolutely gorgeous. 1437 01:20:23,710 --> 01:20:27,323 He said, "show me a good-looking woman, and i'll show you a guy who's tired of fucking her." 1438 01:20:27,323 --> 01:20:30,978 Men and women are very different when it comes to sex. 1439 01:20:30,978 --> 01:20:36,854 Uh, men seem to think that it's an impossibility to be with one person. 1440 01:20:36,854 --> 01:20:39,160 Probably because they're pigs. 1441 01:20:39,160 --> 01:20:43,556 So this is a married girl you're talking about? - Yeah, yeah. 1442 01:20:43,556 --> 01:20:47,343 - Why would you even fool around with something like that? - I don't know. 1443 01:20:47,343 --> 01:20:50,346 - 'cause i got a good feeling about it. - Oh, you got a good feeling. 1444 01:20:50,346 --> 01:20:53,914 Oh, boy, oh, boy. I get a good feeling about almost every girl i see. 1445 01:20:53,914 --> 01:20:56,656 It's different. There's something kind of sad about her. 1446 01:20:56,656 --> 01:21:00,356 - It's like this wounded bird you wanna take care of. - Really, is that right? 1447 01:21:00,356 --> 01:21:04,403 Well, excuse me, but who the hell are you to be taking care of anybody? 1448 01:21:04,403 --> 01:21:07,319 If I'm not mistaken, you're the guy that's still living in my apartment... 1449 01:21:07,319 --> 01:21:10,061 And you're in no position to take care of somebody. 1450 01:21:10,061 --> 01:21:15,153 Tommy, you're not a savior, okay? and I'm sure this chick don't need or want your saving. 1451 01:21:15,153 --> 01:21:18,112 But it's like-- look, I mean, it's not like I was hitting on her. 1452 01:21:18,112 --> 01:21:21,594 I don't know. I was talking to her. It felt good. so, what, I just-- 1453 01:21:21,594 --> 01:21:25,685 I want you to trust me on something. I'm gonna speak from experience here. 1454 01:21:25,685 --> 01:21:29,820 I am as big a dog as there is, okay? 1455 01:21:29,820 --> 01:21:33,345 But it is not a good idea to fool around with married women. 1456 01:21:33,345 --> 01:21:35,434 It's bad karma, kid. 1457 01:21:35,434 --> 01:21:38,872 What about that girl, uh, Maria? 1458 01:21:38,872 --> 01:21:41,179 - Maria, the schoolteacher? - Yeah. 1459 01:21:41,179 --> 01:21:45,618 I took her on a couple of dates. She never called me back. Totally gave me the brush. 1460 01:21:45,618 --> 01:21:51,494 Tommy, let me explain something to you, okay? I wanna speak to you like a son. 1461 01:21:51,494 --> 01:21:55,411 Chicks don't brush guys off. 1462 01:21:55,411 --> 01:21:59,023 Guys brush chicks off, okay? That's just the way it is. 1463 01:22:13,385 --> 01:22:16,170 - Wow. Hi. - How you been? 1464 01:22:16,170 --> 01:22:19,435 How have you been? You know, I've been better. 1465 01:22:19,435 --> 01:22:23,395 And i called you a couple of times. I never heard back from you. 1466 01:22:23,395 --> 01:22:26,093 - I've been meaning to call you back. - Yeah? 1467 01:22:26,093 --> 01:22:28,748 What, you just never got around to it? 1468 01:22:30,924 --> 01:22:34,406 Um--don't-- seriously, don't sweat it at all. It's cool. 1469 01:22:34,406 --> 01:22:36,756 No, but i really-- I really-- 1470 01:22:36,756 --> 01:22:39,455 I wanted to apologize. I'm sorry. 1471 01:22:39,455 --> 01:22:41,848 Really, it's-- you know. It's cool. 1472 01:22:41,848 --> 01:22:45,461 I get it, you know. I'll, uh-- 1473 01:22:45,461 --> 01:22:47,680 I'll see you around. 1474 01:22:53,512 --> 01:22:57,081 Look, did I-- did I screw it up somehow? 1475 01:22:57,081 --> 01:23:00,693 I thought we had a good time that night. And then in the morning... 1476 01:23:00,693 --> 01:23:04,305 You're like rushing off saying you had to go to the zoo or something. 1477 01:23:04,305 --> 01:23:06,917 What happened? 1478 01:23:06,917 --> 01:23:10,355 Nothing. I just - did we not have a good time? 1479 01:23:10,355 --> 01:23:14,533 No, I had a great time. It has nothing to do with you. It was not your fault. 1480 01:23:14,533 --> 01:23:18,363 I got a little freaked out. I'd really like it if you called me again. 1481 01:23:18,363 --> 01:23:20,931 Are you sure? I mean.. - Yeah. 1482 01:23:20,931 --> 01:23:22,802 It's not just 'cause you ran into me? 1483 01:23:22,802 --> 01:23:25,979 I won't get the machine? No. 1484 01:23:25,979 --> 01:23:28,504 Unless I'm not home. 1485 01:23:28,504 --> 01:23:30,462 Can't promise I'll be home. 1486 01:23:31,898 --> 01:23:34,466 Look, really, I just-- I'm-- 1487 01:23:35,815 --> 01:23:38,731 all right. 1488 01:23:38,731 --> 01:23:41,517 I'll call then. I'll call you next week. 1489 01:23:41,517 --> 01:23:46,347 But, you know, you better- - I will. 1490 01:23:46,347 --> 01:23:48,436 - Don't play with me, you know. - I won't. 1491 01:23:58,838 --> 01:24:01,537 So? 1492 01:24:01,537 --> 01:24:06,498 I don't know. I think maybe I should get a second opinion. 1493 01:24:08,456 --> 01:24:11,895 Well, Maria, I've got some good news and some more good news. 1494 01:24:11,895 --> 01:24:16,595 What would you like to hear first? - Guess I'll pick the good news. 1495 01:24:16,595 --> 01:24:20,556 - Your aids test is negative. - That is good news. 1496 01:24:20,556 --> 01:24:22,732 And the other good news? - You're pregnant. 1497 01:24:55,199 --> 01:24:57,984 What the fuck are you doing here, Griffin? 1498 01:24:57,984 --> 01:25:01,553 I just want you to know that i want to be with you, 1499 01:25:01,553 --> 01:25:03,599 And I'm willing to leave Annie if that's what it takes. 1500 01:25:03,599 --> 01:25:06,950 I don't want to break up your marriage, okay? 1501 01:25:06,950 --> 01:25:09,692 What do you mean? That's what I thought you wanted. 1502 01:25:09,692 --> 01:25:12,085 You thought that I wanted that? 1503 01:25:12,085 --> 01:25:15,654 I never fucking wanted that! I just wanted to see you. 1504 01:25:15,654 --> 01:25:19,179 Only reason you're outside of my apartment and you're here telling me this now... 1505 01:25:19,179 --> 01:25:21,617 Is because you can't have me. - No, that's not true. 1506 01:25:21,617 --> 01:25:24,707 - Yeah, it is. - I am here because I love you-- because I love you. 1507 01:25:24,707 --> 01:25:26,796 - Come here. - Get the fuck off of me. 1508 01:25:28,362 --> 01:25:31,191 Will you at least think about it? 1509 01:25:33,106 --> 01:25:35,413 Will you at least think about it? 1510 01:25:45,684 --> 01:25:48,687 It's Maria. please leave a message and I'll call you back. 1511 01:25:48,687 --> 01:25:52,430 Hey, Maria, how you doing? It's Tommy. I know I called you a couple of times already. 1512 01:25:52,430 --> 01:25:56,695 Figured I'd try one more time. I thought at the video store you wanted to get together, 1513 01:25:56,695 --> 01:25:59,655 but, uh, maybe I was mistaken. 1514 01:25:59,655 --> 01:26:01,918 So, look, all right. um, 'll be good... 1515 01:26:01,918 --> 01:26:04,616 and I'll see you around... whenever. 1516 01:26:04,616 --> 01:26:07,053 All right, take it easy. 1517 01:26:08,402 --> 01:26:10,840 You're so sweet. I love you so much. 1518 01:26:13,625 --> 01:26:16,672 Excuse me. Are these yours? 1519 01:26:16,672 --> 01:26:20,676 - Those? - Yeah, these disgusting things with the spots on it. 1520 01:26:20,676 --> 01:26:23,722 Who are-- are you the proud owner of these? 1521 01:26:25,463 --> 01:26:28,379 Yes and no. they-- 1522 01:26:28,379 --> 01:26:31,077 They were Griffin's. I'm gonna vomit. 1523 01:26:31,077 --> 01:26:33,036 - Are you kidding? - No, I'm not kidding. 1524 01:26:33,036 --> 01:26:35,821 I think if this relationship has any chance of surviving, 1525 01:26:35,821 --> 01:26:38,258 We should consider burning these immediately. 1526 01:26:40,652 --> 01:26:43,307 What's wrong? - Nothing. 1527 01:26:43,307 --> 01:26:46,049 Listen, sweetie, if there's something wrong, you should talk to me. 1528 01:26:46,049 --> 01:26:50,314 Nothing's wrong. I already told you. Don't worry about it. All right? Come on. 1529 01:26:56,886 --> 01:26:59,018 You don't think I can tell? I told you, it's nothing. 1530 01:26:59,018 --> 01:27:03,022 It's not nothing. Just talk to me, okay? We talked fine before. 1531 01:27:03,022 --> 01:27:05,372 Can we have silence for a little while? 1532 01:27:05,372 --> 01:27:08,854 - We've had silence for the past fuckin' ten minutes! - Why do we have to talk? 1533 01:27:08,854 --> 01:27:10,856 I don't know what's wrong with me! 1534 01:27:10,856 --> 01:27:15,382 - Why are you crying? Calm down first of all. - I don't wanna calm down. 1535 01:27:15,382 --> 01:27:18,342 Just talk to me. come on. I can understand. 1536 01:27:18,342 --> 01:27:21,040 Benny, I just need a little bit of space right now, okay? 1537 01:27:21,040 --> 01:27:23,739 What do you mean, "space"? 1538 01:27:23,739 --> 01:27:27,394 It's all of this. It's just too much too quickly, and I don't know how to deal with it. 1539 01:27:27,394 --> 01:27:30,093 You breaking up with me? Is that it? 1540 01:27:30,093 --> 01:27:35,838 What are you doing to me? One second you like me and the next second you don't. 1541 01:27:35,838 --> 01:27:39,667 - I'm sorry, Benny. - You can't play games with people like this. 1542 01:27:39,667 --> 01:27:43,497 What is it? it's this dentist. You wanna go back to him. You're fucking-- 1543 01:27:43,497 --> 01:27:46,631 He's your man, right? I'm sorry I stepped in between. 1544 01:27:46,631 --> 01:27:49,590 You should have told me that a long time ago. 1545 01:27:49,590 --> 01:27:53,116 - Give me the bag, please. - You're being so stupid. You're being so stupid. 1546 01:27:53,116 --> 01:27:56,684 - Benny, please give me the bag. - Don't you see how great this is? Here. Take the bag. 1547 01:27:56,684 --> 01:27:59,644 Don't you see how great this is? where you running? - Yes! 1548 01:27:59,644 --> 01:28:02,690 Don't run away from me. Ashley. 1549 01:28:02,690 --> 01:28:05,432 Sweetie. 1550 01:28:05,432 --> 01:28:08,784 You don't wanna talk to me now? You're gonna run home? 1551 01:28:08,784 --> 01:28:11,525 - Benny, please go home, okay? - I'm going home. 1552 01:28:16,356 --> 01:28:20,447 I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I'm a nice jewish kid from Brooklyn. 1553 01:28:20,447 --> 01:28:24,800 These kind of things shouldn't be happening to me. It shouldn't be this hard for me. 1554 01:28:24,800 --> 01:28:27,846 But, uh, that's life. 1555 01:28:27,846 --> 01:28:31,023 One second we're having such a good time. We're falling in love. 1556 01:28:31,023 --> 01:28:34,461 Then the next second, out of the blue, she drops this shit on me. 1557 01:28:34,461 --> 01:28:38,422 I feel like I should just forget about women, stay home and play with myself. 1558 01:28:38,422 --> 01:28:40,424 You told her you loved her? - Yeah. So? 1559 01:28:40,424 --> 01:28:43,079 So? So, what are you, a fucking retard? 1560 01:28:43,079 --> 01:28:45,559 Jesus, that's why she dumped your sorry ass. 1561 01:28:45,559 --> 01:28:50,564 She was just looking to fuck and you gotta throw the "love" at her. Screw the whole thing up. 1562 01:28:50,564 --> 01:28:52,479 - I'm not a retard, all right? - Whatever. 1563 01:28:52,479 --> 01:28:54,742 And I do love her, man. I love her, man. 1564 01:28:54,742 --> 01:28:57,963 You know what? When you gonna start thinking rock star and acting rock star? 1565 01:29:38,743 --> 01:29:40,876 Hold on. - What? 1566 01:29:40,876 --> 01:29:44,705 - Let's just take it slow, okay? - I want you. 1567 01:29:44,705 --> 01:29:47,143 - Don't you wanna talk? Let's talk. 1568 01:29:47,143 --> 01:29:50,842 No. Yeah, I mean-- But I only have an hour for lunch, so-- 1569 01:29:50,842 --> 01:29:53,323 But we can talk-- 1570 01:29:53,323 --> 01:29:56,935 - What? - You don't love me, Griff. 1571 01:29:56,935 --> 01:30:00,025 - Yes, I do. - No, you don't. 1572 01:30:00,025 --> 01:30:03,637 - What are you talking about? - You don't love anybody. 1573 01:30:03,637 --> 01:30:06,336 - What do you mean, I don't? - You use people. 1574 01:30:06,336 --> 01:30:08,555 You used me. You used your wife. 1575 01:30:08,555 --> 01:30:11,297 - What do you mean, I "use people"? - You use everybody. 1576 01:30:11,297 --> 01:30:14,822 You know what? that's the way the world works. People use each other, okay? 1577 01:30:14,822 --> 01:30:17,608 They take from each other what they need to make them happy. 1578 01:30:17,608 --> 01:30:21,220 You use me to make you happy. I use you to make me happy. 1579 01:30:21,220 --> 01:30:24,354 Sometimes you've gotta give back a little bit. 1580 01:30:24,354 --> 01:30:26,573 I don't give back at all? - I'm not saying-- 1581 01:30:26,573 --> 01:30:30,012 I told you that I love you. I told you that I'd leave my wife for you. 1582 01:30:30,012 --> 01:30:34,059 I sent you flowers last week. what are you talking about? - I remember. 1583 01:30:34,059 --> 01:30:36,583 - What are you doing? Come here. - I gotta go. 1584 01:30:36,583 --> 01:30:39,586 - What do you mean? - This is the same old shit and i'm sick of it. 1585 01:30:39,586 --> 01:30:42,372 You're sick of what? What exactly are you sick of? 1586 01:30:42,372 --> 01:30:45,766 Why is it the same old shit? I told you things were gonna change. 1587 01:30:45,766 --> 01:30:49,640 What are you talking about? Is this about what's his name, your new boyfriend? 1588 01:30:49,640 --> 01:30:53,252 - His name is Ben. - Okay, Ben. Well, is this-- Fuck Ben! 1589 01:30:53,252 --> 01:30:56,995 - Fuck you! - And fuck you too! 1590 01:30:56,995 --> 01:30:59,389 Wait a minute. Come here. 1591 01:31:04,524 --> 01:31:06,483 Unbelievable. 1592 01:31:10,356 --> 01:31:14,578 Hillary and I have something we'd like to say to both of you. 1593 01:31:14,578 --> 01:31:17,929 Firstly, we would like to apologize for the way we've behaved the past months. 1594 01:31:17,929 --> 01:31:22,238 Yeah. You both know our relationship has been a mess, 1595 01:31:22,238 --> 01:31:24,588 And that we've each screwed up pretty badly. 1596 01:31:24,588 --> 01:31:28,200 And... I know you know what I'm talking about. 1597 01:31:28,200 --> 01:31:32,683 But we've decided to, you know, go to therapy and save our marriage. 1598 01:31:32,683 --> 01:31:35,599 And everything's better, much better now. 1599 01:31:35,599 --> 01:31:37,644 We're working on my void. 1600 01:31:37,644 --> 01:31:41,431 Yeah, yeah. Harry's gonna sell the property upstate... 1601 01:31:41,431 --> 01:31:44,651 And the logs and the power tools. 1602 01:31:44,651 --> 01:31:49,613 And Hillary's getting a new gynecologist-- One she promises not to fornicate with. 1603 01:31:49,613 --> 01:31:54,139 And that's about it. How are you guys doing? 1604 01:31:55,662 --> 01:31:58,448 Oh, you know, we're doing good. 1605 01:31:58,448 --> 01:32:01,494 Right? I mean-- 1606 01:32:12,027 --> 01:32:15,726 So what do you think about that? About what? 1607 01:32:15,726 --> 01:32:19,686 About doing what Harry and Hillary did-- going to a marriage counselor? 1608 01:32:19,686 --> 01:32:23,647 You think I'm a fucking moron? How long have you been cheating on me? 1609 01:32:23,647 --> 01:32:27,433 Wait. Honey, wait. look, I love you-- 1610 01:32:27,433 --> 01:32:30,871 No, you don't love me, because love means respecting someone and caring about them! 1611 01:32:30,871 --> 01:32:34,136 It doesn't mean sneaking around and fucking some slut! - wait a minute-- 1612 01:32:34,136 --> 01:32:37,922 Shut up, okay? I want someone who's gonna love me and when I look in their eyes... 1613 01:32:37,922 --> 01:32:40,794 I can see they think I'm great and who'll make me feel beautiful... 1614 01:32:40,794 --> 01:32:44,059 And who will wanna hold me when they get home from work the way you used to. 1615 01:32:44,059 --> 01:32:47,975 But not now when you think that I'm a nuisance if I want to make love or even talk. 1616 01:32:47,975 --> 01:32:51,675 I'm fucking tired of it. I know you're having an affair or affairs or whatever! 1617 01:32:51,675 --> 01:32:55,200 But it's over and I want a divorce. 1618 01:32:56,680 --> 01:32:58,247 Wait a minute. Wait. 1619 01:33:04,079 --> 01:33:08,648 And to answer your question, no, I would not describe it as big. 1620 01:33:12,087 --> 01:33:14,959 I didn't even know I was gonna do it, but I went with it. 1621 01:33:14,959 --> 01:33:19,006 I just said what the hell, and I said it and I've never felt so good in my entire life. 1622 01:33:19,006 --> 01:33:22,445 I didn't even know what I was gonna do, but I just felt relief, 1623 01:33:22,445 --> 01:33:27,145 Like this huge weight was lifted off my shoulders-- I felt so good. 1624 01:33:27,145 --> 01:33:31,802 You're looking for Tommy? Sure, come on in. - Yeah. 1625 01:33:31,802 --> 01:33:35,153 - Is he here? - Well, you see, 1626 01:33:35,153 --> 01:33:37,895 Tommy did live here, but he doesn't live here anymore. 1627 01:33:37,895 --> 01:33:41,333 He moved out about a week ago. you must be Maria. 1628 01:33:41,333 --> 01:33:45,729 Yeah. Yeah. You, um-- you must be-- 1629 01:33:45,729 --> 01:33:49,776 The man who taught him everything he knows. 1630 01:33:49,776 --> 01:33:54,433 Um, I kind of have something really important to tell him. Do you have his new address? 1631 01:33:54,433 --> 01:33:56,740 Yeah, sure, I do have his new address. 1632 01:33:56,740 --> 01:34:00,570 But, uh, can I offer you a drink? 1633 01:34:00,570 --> 01:34:03,050 No, thank you. I really-- I-- 1634 01:34:03,050 --> 01:34:05,792 Does he live around here? 1635 01:34:05,792 --> 01:34:09,927 You hungry or want to listen to some Montovani or something like that? 1636 01:34:09,927 --> 01:34:12,886 No, thank you. The address would be fine. 1637 01:34:12,886 --> 01:34:16,542 Okay, all right. I'll give you his address. 1638 01:34:16,542 --> 01:34:21,199 But, uh, if it doesn't work out with the kid, 1639 01:34:21,199 --> 01:34:23,767 Well, you know where to find me. 1640 01:34:23,767 --> 01:34:28,206 You just have to ask yourself one simple question: 1641 01:34:28,206 --> 01:34:32,123 Do you want to sit up on the porch with the pup... 1642 01:34:32,123 --> 01:34:34,908 Or do you wanna run in the yard with the big dog? 1643 01:34:38,521 --> 01:34:41,437 The address, please. That would be great. 1644 01:34:41,437 --> 01:34:43,439 You got it. 1645 01:34:43,439 --> 01:34:46,746 - Carpo. - you got it. 1646 01:34:46,746 --> 01:34:48,748 Carpo. 1647 01:35:11,597 --> 01:35:14,731 Hi. What are you doing here? 1648 01:35:15,906 --> 01:35:19,214 Um, I got your address from Carpo. 1649 01:35:19,214 --> 01:35:21,825 I wanted to tell you something. 1650 01:35:21,825 --> 01:35:25,220 Regarding what? 1651 01:35:25,220 --> 01:35:27,178 Us, I guess. 1652 01:35:29,354 --> 01:35:31,878 Look, I gotta be honest with you. 1653 01:35:31,878 --> 01:35:36,840 I mean, I can't say that I'm really so interested anymore. 1654 01:35:36,840 --> 01:35:38,885 You know. I mean, it's just-- 1655 01:35:38,885 --> 01:35:42,019 After I saw you at the video store and you asked me to call you, 1656 01:35:42,019 --> 01:35:46,676 I called you a bunch of times and I never heard back from you... again. 1657 01:35:46,676 --> 01:35:50,070 Yeah, I wanted to-- 1658 01:35:50,070 --> 01:35:51,985 I don't know, apologize for that. 1659 01:35:53,900 --> 01:35:57,252 I'm sorry for not calling you back. Look, I'm sorry too. 1660 01:35:58,992 --> 01:36:02,822 So, what is so important that you needed to talk to me? 1661 01:36:02,822 --> 01:36:05,303 I-I-- wow. 1662 01:36:05,303 --> 01:36:08,915 I just-- I wanted to tell you that I'm leaving. 1663 01:36:08,915 --> 01:36:13,093 Um, I got this out-of-town job teaching. 1664 01:36:13,093 --> 01:36:15,400 It's great. 1665 01:36:15,400 --> 01:36:19,143 so, I'm-I'm-I'm leaving. I'm moving. 1666 01:36:19,143 --> 01:36:21,841 That's it. 1667 01:36:21,841 --> 01:36:24,017 I don't know what to say. 1668 01:36:24,017 --> 01:36:26,281 I guess, good luck. 1669 01:36:26,281 --> 01:36:28,195 Yeah. 1670 01:36:29,806 --> 01:36:32,635 - Thank you. - I'll see you around. 1671 01:36:32,635 --> 01:36:35,855 Yeah.or... maybe not, right? 1672 01:36:37,640 --> 01:36:39,511 - Okay. - Good luck. 1673 01:36:46,388 --> 01:36:48,390 oh. 1674 01:36:48,390 --> 01:36:50,566 Tommy, um, 1675 01:36:52,350 --> 01:36:56,920 I just realized I don't even know your last name, so-- 1676 01:36:56,920 --> 01:37:00,227 - It's Reilly. what about you? - Reilly. 1677 01:37:00,227 --> 01:37:02,317 Um, Tedesco. 1678 01:37:04,406 --> 01:37:07,974 We probably should have gotten that out of the way a little earlier, huh? 1679 01:37:07,974 --> 01:37:10,325 Yeah. 1680 01:37:10,325 --> 01:37:12,675 - Good luck. - Yeah, you too. 1681 01:37:17,680 --> 01:37:19,551 take care. 1682 01:37:21,988 --> 01:37:24,991 So why didn't you tell Tommy you were pregnant with his baby? 1683 01:37:24,991 --> 01:37:27,994 I showed up at his door. I was gonna ring the buzzer... 1684 01:37:27,994 --> 01:37:32,477 And go up there and, you know, tell him. 1685 01:37:32,477 --> 01:37:35,393 Then i realized that I didn't know his last name. 1686 01:37:35,393 --> 01:37:37,090 I didn't know what buzzer to press. 1687 01:37:37,090 --> 01:37:40,006 Reality is that we were supposed to have a one-night stand. 1688 01:37:40,006 --> 01:37:42,922 It went a little awry. I got pregnant. But that doesn't mean that... 1689 01:37:42,922 --> 01:37:45,055 We should be together. 1690 01:37:45,055 --> 01:37:48,754 I gotta admit, it was weird when she showed up at my apartment to tell me... 1691 01:37:48,754 --> 01:37:50,843 She was moving out of town. 1692 01:37:50,843 --> 01:37:53,193 I don't know what that was about. 1693 01:37:53,193 --> 01:37:55,195 What's with you? - what's with you? 1694 01:37:55,195 --> 01:37:58,373 I'm tired of looking at your sour puss. 1695 01:38:00,113 --> 01:38:04,074 What's my horoscope say for today? 1696 01:38:04,074 --> 01:38:08,121 "Today would be a good day to get up off your ass and admit you're a coward... 1697 01:38:08,121 --> 01:38:12,082 And make up with the special someone who will make you very happy." 1698 01:38:13,431 --> 01:38:17,304 - Does it really say that? - Does it matter? 1699 01:38:31,710 --> 01:38:34,452 - Hi. - What are you doing here? 1700 01:38:34,452 --> 01:38:37,673 - Do you hate me? - No. No, just the opposite. 1701 01:38:37,673 --> 01:38:41,024 - Do you hate me? - No, i don't hate you. 1702 01:38:41,024 --> 01:38:43,461 - Do you-- Do you love me? - Yes. 1703 01:38:43,461 --> 01:38:46,464 - 'cause every night I'm crying. I can't eat. - I'm sorry. 1704 01:38:46,464 --> 01:38:48,988 No. You gotta eat. 1705 01:38:54,429 --> 01:38:56,822 I love you, you know that? 1706 01:38:56,822 --> 01:39:00,565 You know, you paid for an hour. 1707 01:39:00,565 --> 01:39:04,482 Is there anything else you want me to do? 1708 01:39:04,482 --> 01:39:07,485 Yeah. Would you mind doing the dishes? 1709 01:39:07,485 --> 01:39:10,575 - Fuck you. - No, wait. I'm only kidding. Come here. 1710 01:39:10,575 --> 01:39:12,621 I'm only kidding. 1711 01:39:12,621 --> 01:39:16,451 You wanna stay and talk for a little bit or-- 1712 01:39:18,975 --> 01:39:21,456 No. It's okay. 1713 01:39:27,200 --> 01:39:31,074 Just call him up and ask him out. 1714 01:39:31,074 --> 01:39:33,903 Maybe I should just wait until I show him an apartment. 1715 01:39:33,903 --> 01:39:36,122 Why would you wait? What's his number? 1716 01:39:36,122 --> 01:39:39,474 - I'm not gonna call him now. - Oh, yes, you are. What's his number? 1717 01:39:39,474 --> 01:39:41,650 You are not gonna call him. 1718 01:39:41,650 --> 01:39:45,828 Give me the number. 1719 01:39:45,828 --> 01:39:49,353 - If you really want me to call him, I'll call him. - Do it. 1720 01:39:59,058 --> 01:40:03,672 Thomas Reilly. 1721 01:40:03,672 --> 01:40:05,456 - Hi, it's Annie. - Annie, Um-- 1722 01:40:05,456 --> 01:40:08,981 - Annie who? - Annie Matthews from the real estate office. 1723 01:40:08,981 --> 01:40:12,419 - Oh, yeah. Hey, how you doing? - Good. How are you? 1724 01:40:12,419 --> 01:40:15,466 I'm good. Look, I meant to call you last week. 1725 01:40:15,466 --> 01:40:18,164 Because I found an apartment through a buddy of mine. 1726 01:40:18,164 --> 01:40:20,950 So i'm not gonna need to look at anymore spaces. 1727 01:40:22,212 --> 01:40:24,388 Oh, okay. 1728 01:40:29,349 --> 01:40:31,526 Well, uh, you know, what's up? 1729 01:40:31,526 --> 01:40:34,529 Well, I was just wondering-- 1730 01:40:36,748 --> 01:40:40,317 I have this really great apartment that I really wanted to show you. 1731 01:40:40,317 --> 01:40:44,974 But if you already found a place, that's okay. I'll talk to you soon. 1732 01:40:46,410 --> 01:40:49,282 What the hell was that? 1733 01:40:49,282 --> 01:40:52,068 I just didn't feel right about it. 1734 01:40:52,068 --> 01:40:55,811 You're such a wimp. I'm gonna call him. 1735 01:40:55,811 --> 01:40:59,031 No, don't call him! I'll call him later, I promise. 1736 01:40:59,031 --> 01:41:02,382 Thomas Reilly. 1737 01:41:02,382 --> 01:41:06,691 It's Annie again. the real reason I was calling is, um, 1738 01:41:06,691 --> 01:41:11,783 I wanted to know if you would, like, go to dinner with me on Saturday night? 1739 01:41:11,783 --> 01:41:15,134 What, uh-- what happened with your husband? 1740 01:41:15,134 --> 01:41:17,180 Are you still with him? - No. 1741 01:41:17,180 --> 01:41:20,531 He was an asshole. and he has a small dick. 1742 01:41:20,531 --> 01:41:23,621 um-- 1743 01:41:23,621 --> 01:41:26,450 All right. Well, in that case, yeah. 1744 01:41:26,450 --> 01:41:29,279 - I'd love to go out to dinner. - Okay, great. 1745 01:41:29,279 --> 01:41:33,283 I'll call you Friday. gotta go. Call him Friday. The date's on Saturday. 1746 01:41:33,283 --> 01:41:34,850 Yeah! 1747 01:41:42,945 --> 01:41:46,644 After you get divorced, it's like you never think... 1748 01:41:46,644 --> 01:41:49,125 You'll fall in love again. 1749 01:41:49,125 --> 01:41:51,431 You never think you'll find this kind of love. 1750 01:41:51,431 --> 01:41:55,522 Now, I look back on my relationship with Griffin, 1751 01:41:55,522 --> 01:41:58,700 And now i realize that definitely that I was in a bad place at the time. 1752 01:41:58,700 --> 01:42:00,832 Very bad. Very bad. 1753 01:42:00,832 --> 01:42:03,139 But if I didn't go through that, I might not be ready for this. 1754 01:42:03,139 --> 01:42:07,709 There are no wrong choices. As long as you have the faith to make a choice, 1755 01:42:07,709 --> 01:42:11,756 Then it's gotta be right, you know, no matter where it leads you. 1756 01:42:11,756 --> 01:42:14,585 I chose wisely, I think. - I think so too. 1757 01:42:14,585 --> 01:42:17,457 - Is that all you need? Is that good? - Is that okay? 1758 01:42:17,457 --> 01:42:20,373 Well, after i got over the initial shock, 1759 01:42:20,373 --> 01:42:23,246 I knew I wanted this baby. 1760 01:42:23,246 --> 01:42:26,989 Everyone was telling me I shouldn't do it, but i'm tired of listening to everyone else. 1761 01:42:26,989 --> 01:42:30,470 I did the marriage thing. I'm not gonna wait around for someone. 1762 01:42:30,470 --> 01:42:32,690 I already have someone. 1763 01:42:32,690 --> 01:42:35,171 So, it wasn't much of a decision. 1764 01:42:35,171 --> 01:42:38,174 What? what else do you wanna know? 1765 01:42:38,174 --> 01:42:41,307 Huh? Is there anything else you wanna know? 1766 01:42:41,307 --> 01:42:46,138 What I don't like about love or sex again? Is that what you wanna know? Forget it. 1767 01:42:46,138 --> 01:42:48,706 I never thought I'd be the kind of person to get divorced. 1768 01:42:48,706 --> 01:42:52,623 I grew up with these ideas of love everlasting, but i guess these things happen. 1769 01:42:52,623 --> 01:42:56,235 And I just feel-- I feel excited about... 1770 01:42:56,235 --> 01:42:59,238 Getting on with the rest of my life. 1771 01:42:59,238 --> 01:43:03,242 I feel hopeful. I feel relieved-- very relieved. 1772 01:43:03,242 --> 01:43:07,638 I was really sick of him, really. No, I'm just-- 1773 01:43:07,638 --> 01:43:09,640 I don't know. 1774 01:43:09,640 --> 01:43:12,991 I don't think anybody has any of the answers to any of this. 1775 01:43:12,991 --> 01:43:15,254 I mean, sex and love, it's all so complex. 1776 01:43:15,254 --> 01:43:18,954 If we had answers, all of us would be in these great, solid, happy relationships. 1777 01:43:18,954 --> 01:43:21,304 But so few of us are. 1778 01:43:21,304 --> 01:43:25,308 We're all searchin' for that thing and we have so much trouble findin' it, 1779 01:43:25,308 --> 01:43:28,485 But, who knows, maybe that's part of the fun of the whole thing.