1 00:00:01,210 --> 00:00:08,133 [soft piano music] 2 00:03:22,077 --> 00:03:25,163 When do dreams stop and where does reality begin? 3 00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:29,668 [whining] 4 00:03:30,085 --> 00:03:31,670 Stop whining, you wimp. 5 00:03:33,255 --> 00:03:35,674 Aunt Irene, I'm confused. 6 00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:37,718 I have a hard on. 7 00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:41,054 When will my nightmare stop? 8 00:03:42,097 --> 00:03:44,433 Soon, Richard. Hopefully soon. 9 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:48,311 My friends and lovers, Arthur Seward and his sister, Sybil, will be in town soon. 10 00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:52,399 You need as much help as I do, Aunt Irene. 11 00:03:53,024 --> 00:03:53,942 All you do is fuck. 12 00:03:55,277 --> 00:03:56,194 Shut up, Richard. 13 00:03:57,112 --> 00:03:58,238 Nightmares are a bore. 14 00:04:00,282 --> 00:04:01,283 Paging Nurse Lawson. 15 00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:02,784 To Ward B. 16 00:04:03,118 --> 00:04:05,245 No oxygen in the emergency room. 17 00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:09,332 Dr. Bradley, paging Dr. Bradley. 18 00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:11,460 I'm nervous, Aunt Irene. 19 00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:14,421 Relax, Richard. Your sleepless nights will soon be over. 20 00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:16,548 Phony bitch. 21 00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:20,552 - Irene, we've been expecting you. - Arthur. Dearest Arthur. 22 00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:22,679 - Sybil. - So nice to see you, Irene. 23 00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:25,307 - And this must be your nephew, Richard. - Yes, it is. 24 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:27,809 Henry, show Mr. Renfield to his room. 25 00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:30,061 Suckers. 26 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,689 - Arthur, it's been so long. - You look marvelous. 27 00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:36,443 I've been trying to take care of myself since my wife died. 28 00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:38,403 What a way to learn about yourself. 29 00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:41,823 Yes, traumas do have ways of affecting one. 30 00:04:42,157 --> 00:04:44,910 Sybil will show you to your room, you may bathe or whatever you want. 31 00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:46,787 - Thank you, Arthur. - Come, my dear. 32 00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:49,289 Henry, see me in my study immediately. 33 00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:50,373 Attention. 34 00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:54,836 The first annual Seward Sanitarium rubber raft race is cancelled 35 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,088 due to a crab epidemic in Ward A. 36 00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:01,510 I put that new nut in his room. 37 00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:06,473 Please, do not refer to them as nuts. 38 00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:07,641 Now, before you go, 39 00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:09,267 check on the rest of the patients downstairs, 40 00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:11,228 see if Mrs. Renfield needs anything. 41 00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:13,355 Yes, sir. 42 00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:16,733 That bastard Steward, always giving me orders 43 00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:18,610 like he thinks he owns this place, 44 00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:21,905 but it's that big-titted bitch, Sybil, who's really in charge. 45 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:26,451 Hell, this nuthouse will fall apart if I wasn't around here to wipe up. 46 00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:30,664 [sobbing] 47 00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:31,832 Help me. 48 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:35,293 I haven't slept there, I can't stand this pressure anymore. 49 00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:36,962 I need something to sleep. 50 00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:39,256 I've got to help Richard, I've got to help myself. 51 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:40,423 You want help? 52 00:05:40,757 --> 00:05:41,550 You want help? 53 00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:43,260 - Yes, I admit. - I'll give you fucking help. 54 00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:45,262 I'm beginning to have them myself. 55 00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:48,014 - I need to sleep, I need to sleep. - [grunting] 56 00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:53,019 [moaning] 57 00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,312 You like that help? 58 00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:58,316 No, no, no. 59 00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:05,574 [moaning and grunting] 60 00:06:14,291 --> 00:06:15,625 This will help you sleep well. 61 00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:22,799 [moaning and grunting] 62 00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:24,301 There you go. 63 00:06:26,261 --> 00:06:27,178 [laughing] 64 00:06:27,679 --> 00:06:29,097 How do you like them apples, bitch? 65 00:06:29,431 --> 00:06:30,557 [laughing] 66 00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:34,769 [moaning and grunting] 67 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:35,937 Enough help? 68 00:06:36,771 --> 00:06:38,064 [moaning and grunting] 69 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,774 - You had enough help? - Oh, God. 70 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:42,193 Huh? Huh? 71 00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:44,362 [moaning] 72 00:06:44,696 --> 00:06:47,532 [panting] 73 00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:56,166 [moaning and grunting] 74 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:06,134 Here's a little love lotion for your tranquilizer. 75 00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:07,302 There you go. 76 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:10,305 You are a slob. 77 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:11,681 [chuckling] 78 00:07:14,476 --> 00:07:15,977 You are coming back, aren't you? 79 00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:18,021 I need another apple. 80 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:19,397 Bring a bushel. 81 00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:22,150 [moaning] 82 00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:26,529 This way, Professor. 83 00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:32,160 They're always making tremendous progress here. 84 00:07:32,494 --> 00:07:33,328 Where? 85 00:07:34,913 --> 00:07:36,206 - Mr. Renfield. - Buddy. 86 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,459 Now, the thing with Tim is, he just came. 87 00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:42,545 He has the same symptoms, his cravings as all the other ones. 88 00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:46,341 They've all taken on different roles, but the same cravings. 89 00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:51,221 We all have cravings. 90 00:07:51,721 --> 00:07:52,639 Yes. 91 00:07:53,431 --> 00:07:54,516 How is she? 92 00:07:55,392 --> 00:07:56,726 She's eight years old again. 93 00:07:57,352 --> 00:07:59,145 He just plays his guitar and fornicates 94 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,816 anything he can find. Holes in the walls, straw, anything. 95 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:04,234 Cowboys? 96 00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:06,820 Was this how the West was won? 97 00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:07,904 Yes. 98 00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:15,078 [folk music] 99 00:08:26,756 --> 00:08:31,803 [moaning and grunting] 100 00:08:32,137 --> 00:08:32,887 A little higher. 101 00:08:33,221 --> 00:08:36,850 [moaning and grunting] 102 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,476 Cowboy player. 103 00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:45,650 [folk music] 104 00:08:46,776 --> 00:08:50,989 [moaning and grunting] 105 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:52,615 Oh, Cowboy. 106 00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:57,454 [moaning and grunting] 107 00:08:57,787 --> 00:08:58,621 Oh, it's tight. 108 00:08:59,998 --> 00:09:01,458 Put it in me, Cowboy. 109 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:02,625 [moaning and grunting] 110 00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:03,835 - Get ready -- - [moans] 111 00:09:04,169 --> 00:09:05,003 and ride it. 112 00:09:05,336 --> 00:09:08,715 [moaning and grunting] 113 00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:09,966 Feels good, huh? 114 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:13,636 [moaning and grunting] 115 00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:14,804 How's that? 116 00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,098 Slide just a little bit here. 117 00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:19,017 [moans] 118 00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:20,810 Oh, come on, Cowboy. 119 00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:23,938 [moaning and grunting] 120 00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:25,023 So much. 121 00:09:25,356 --> 00:09:28,109 [moaning and grunting] 122 00:09:28,443 --> 00:09:30,987 Can't help it. 123 00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:33,907 [moaning and grunting] 124 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:35,241 Ride it some more. 125 00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:36,284 [moaning] 126 00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:37,577 Oh, yes. 127 00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:39,496 - Fuck me, Cowboy, fuck me. - Damn. 128 00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:41,664 Go some more. 129 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:46,461 [moaning and grunting] 130 00:09:46,795 --> 00:09:48,630 [moaning] Oh, yes. 131 00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:50,715 Feels good, real good. 132 00:09:51,049 --> 00:09:54,302 Come on. Faster. 133 00:09:54,636 --> 00:10:00,725 [moaning and grunting] 134 00:10:01,059 --> 00:10:02,018 Hi, ho, Silver. 135 00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:09,192 [background noise] [moaning] 136 00:10:09,734 --> 00:10:11,069 Fuck me, baby, fuck me. 137 00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:13,696 [dramatic orchestral music] [moaning] 138 00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:15,073 Oh, my God. 139 00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:38,721 Rub it all over me. 140 00:10:54,237 --> 00:10:56,739 I'm totally puzzled, I can't make anything of it. 141 00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:02,579 [indistinct] 142 00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:03,788 That is different. 143 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:07,709 [crosstalking] 144 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,422 This is the worst one yet. 145 00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:15,466 We had him very relaxed, reading books, smoking a pipe, 146 00:11:15,884 --> 00:11:17,051 now he's back in costume. 147 00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:21,431 I think the marks may be lesions, maybe from a virus or something. 148 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:24,350 One by one, the same thing happened with both of them. 149 00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:34,235 The primary cause of 99.9% of all humans ills is...? 150 00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:36,529 Chronic constipation. 151 00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:38,364 Of course, yes. - Doctor, break out the cocaine. 152 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:48,124 [soft music] 153 00:11:57,175 --> 00:11:58,092 Are you serious. 154 00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,099 I just can't get you out of my mind. 155 00:12:06,309 --> 00:12:08,019 I can't take my eyes off of you. 156 00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:14,734 I'm afraid I love you. 157 00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,987 Oh, you're making me blush. 158 00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:21,824 I never told anybody that before. 159 00:12:23,952 --> 00:12:24,869 It scares me. 160 00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:27,497 I won't bite. 161 00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:36,464 Dr. Bradley, overflow on Ward B. 162 00:12:44,013 --> 00:12:45,306 Attention, Nurse Lawson. 163 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:48,559 Patients expiring in [indistinct]. 164 00:12:58,111 --> 00:12:59,445 What would you like to sing? 165 00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:03,116 You know the song, Swing Low, Sweet Chariot"? 166 00:13:11,165 --> 00:13:14,669 (singing) Swing low, 167 00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:18,464 sweet chariot, 168 00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:24,554 coming for to carry me home. 169 00:13:25,263 --> 00:13:27,765 Swing low, 170 00:13:28,433 --> 00:13:31,644 sweet chariot, 171 00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:37,984 coming for to carry me home. 172 00:13:38,359 --> 00:13:41,446 Well, if you get there 173 00:13:42,030 --> 00:13:44,782 before I do, 174 00:13:45,616 --> 00:13:50,496 coming for to carry me home. 175 00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:57,211 Tell all of my friends I'm coming, too, 176 00:13:57,962 --> 00:14:02,300 coming for to carry me home. 177 00:14:03,885 --> 00:14:06,971 Swing low, 178 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:11,809 sweet chariot, 179 00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:18,232 coming for to carry me home. 180 00:14:18,608 --> 00:14:21,778 Swing low, 181 00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:26,657 sweet chariot, 182 00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:31,496 coming for to carry me 183 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:39,003 home. 184 00:14:39,629 --> 00:14:46,511 [soft orchestral music] 185 00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:49,240 I have a theory. 186 00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:54,162 We're dealing with the undead. Vampires. 187 00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:56,372 - Nosferatu. - Nosferatu? 188 00:15:56,706 --> 00:16:01,294 Yes, Nosferatu. The vampire attacks the body. 189 00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:04,839 He leaves two little marks. 190 00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:08,384 Renfield, the man's obsessed. 191 00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:13,139 He thinks he must devour living things. 192 00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:16,893 But Professor, modern science doesn't admit to such superstitions. 193 00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:18,936 Renfield has escaped. 194 00:16:20,271 --> 00:16:21,189 Where did he go? 195 00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:31,991 Master, I'm here. 196 00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:39,582 [laughing] 197 00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:46,297 [grunting and growling] 198 00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:49,342 I am Dracula. 199 00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:53,471 I bid you welcome. 200 00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,309 Listen to them. 201 00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,437 Children of the night. 202 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:05,066 What music they make, 203 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:08,694 Mr. Renfield. 204 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:14,283 - Where are all the fags you promised? - Blood is the life. 205 00:17:16,494 --> 00:17:18,996 [screaming] 206 00:17:19,330 --> 00:17:20,498 [dogs barking] 207 00:17:20,831 --> 00:17:22,124 Henry! 208 00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:23,376 Richard! 209 00:17:26,587 --> 00:17:28,297 I locked him up so he can't hurt himself anymore. 210 00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:31,759 I'm yours for eternity! 211 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:33,302 Oh, my back. 212 00:17:33,636 --> 00:17:34,470 Ahh. 213 00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:38,849 [screaming] 214 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:43,104 Paging Dr. Stoker, unruly patient in violent ward. 215 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,731 Take his straitjacket off. 216 00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:50,319 Mr. Reinfield, you're looking much better. 217 00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:51,654 You bastard. 218 00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,447 I'm here to help you. 219 00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:57,410 Dr. Seward, send me away from this place. 220 00:17:57,743 --> 00:17:59,120 Send me far away. 221 00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:00,746 Why would you like to leave? 222 00:18:01,956 --> 00:18:05,835 My cries at night, they might disturb Ms. Mina. 223 00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:10,548 They might give her terrible nightmares, Professor Van Helsing. 224 00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,301 Bad dreams. 225 00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:15,970 [wolf howling] 226 00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:18,764 Werewolf? I might have known. 227 00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,225 We know why do wolves talk 228 00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:25,062 and we know how to stop it. 229 00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:30,234 Ahh, You know too much to live, Van Helsing. 230 00:18:30,568 --> 00:18:31,527 Henry, take him away. 231 00:18:31,861 --> 00:18:33,321 I'm warning you, Dr. Seward, 232 00:18:33,654 --> 00:18:34,822 you send me away from this place 233 00:18:35,156 --> 00:18:37,325 or you must answer for what will happen to Ms. Mina. 234 00:18:37,658 --> 00:18:41,454 - Nazi fuck! - What was the herb that excited him so? 235 00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:44,832 Wolfsbane. It grows in central Europe. 236 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:47,376 The natives use it 237 00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:51,047 to protect themselves against vampires. 238 00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:54,175 Watch him closely day and night, 239 00:18:55,301 --> 00:18:57,470 especially night. 240 00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:01,557 [soft orchestral music] 241 00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:53,234 [howling] 242 00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:36,902 [screaming] 243 00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:37,987 Don't move, 244 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:40,906 or I'm going to fuck you til your balls fall off. 245 00:20:42,324 --> 00:20:43,159 Don't move. 246 00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:50,332 [howling] [moaning] 247 00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,259 Don't move. 248 00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:05,347 Come on, stick it in my cunt. 249 00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:08,768 [moaning] 250 00:21:10,561 --> 00:21:11,479 Come on. 251 00:21:13,898 --> 00:21:16,108 Make that prick as big as you can for me. 252 00:21:19,945 --> 00:21:22,406 Don't move. I told you, don't move. 253 00:21:22,740 --> 00:21:26,869 [moaning] 254 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:30,164 Two-hundred years I've waited for this, and this is all I get? 255 00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:33,042 Make it bigger. 256 00:21:35,544 --> 00:21:37,129 Make this damn thing bigger. 257 00:21:37,463 --> 00:21:39,590 [moaning] 258 00:21:39,924 --> 00:21:40,674 Come on. 259 00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:44,428 [moaning] 260 00:21:44,762 --> 00:21:45,596 Come on. 261 00:21:48,682 --> 00:21:51,060 You're going to die if I don't get off from this. 262 00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:53,145 Come on. 263 00:21:53,479 --> 00:22:00,319 [moaning] 264 00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:16,335 Fuck me. 265 00:22:24,260 --> 00:22:26,095 Cum, cum. 266 00:22:26,428 --> 00:22:30,724 [moaning] 267 00:22:31,058 --> 00:22:31,892 That's right. 268 00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:42,611 - [screaming] - Two-hundred years I've waited, 269 00:22:42,945 --> 00:22:44,446 and this is all I'm going to get? 270 00:22:50,369 --> 00:22:51,996 Attention, attention. 271 00:22:52,288 --> 00:22:53,372 This is an emergency. 272 00:22:53,831 --> 00:22:55,708 Bats have been spotted in Ward A. 273 00:22:56,208 --> 00:22:59,253 Please put hair nets on all the patients. 274 00:23:02,882 --> 00:23:05,426 Dracula, I hear you coming, 275 00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:08,053 but I'd like to see you cum, too. 276 00:23:08,762 --> 00:23:11,307 Dracula, cum. 277 00:23:12,558 --> 00:23:14,268 I want to cum, too. 278 00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:17,146 Attention, Henry. 279 00:23:17,563 --> 00:23:18,772 Henry, please get traps. 280 00:23:19,106 --> 00:23:20,357 We have rats in the basement. 281 00:23:29,617 --> 00:23:32,244 [howling] 282 00:23:32,578 --> 00:23:34,371 Is Dr. Seward at home? 283 00:23:34,705 --> 00:23:35,539 Yes, sir. Come right in. 284 00:23:38,709 --> 00:23:40,836 [howling] 285 00:23:43,714 --> 00:23:45,549 I'd love to be fucked by him. 286 00:23:50,346 --> 00:23:51,263 Dr. Seward? 287 00:23:51,597 --> 00:23:52,514 Yes. 288 00:23:52,890 --> 00:23:54,642 I am Count Dracula. 289 00:23:55,184 --> 00:23:57,186 I've just taken Carfax Abbey. 290 00:23:57,811 --> 00:23:59,480 Oh, we'll be neighbors. 291 00:23:59,897 --> 00:24:02,358 That horny Dr. Stoker wouldn't be bad, either, 292 00:24:02,733 --> 00:24:03,776 but he's busy now. 293 00:24:05,653 --> 00:24:07,112 He's with that sluttish maid. 294 00:24:08,197 --> 00:24:10,991 It's rumored she's been fucked by the chauffeur. 295 00:24:18,582 --> 00:24:20,668 People in town are really worried about him, 296 00:24:22,044 --> 00:24:23,337 frightened for some reason. 297 00:24:24,505 --> 00:24:25,506 Frightened? Why? 298 00:24:25,923 --> 00:24:26,757 I don't know. 299 00:24:27,091 --> 00:24:30,386 Maybe it's because he's odd, different, you know? 300 00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:32,471 No, I don't know. 301 00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:39,103 I find him very charming, polite, 302 00:24:43,524 --> 00:24:45,234 something you can learn from. 303 00:24:46,610 --> 00:24:53,534 [moaning] 304 00:25:03,252 --> 00:25:06,797 Dr. Gillespie, Dr. Gillespie. Line six, phone call. 305 00:25:11,719 --> 00:25:12,636 Maybe you're right. 306 00:25:13,429 --> 00:25:14,972 You never see him in the daytime, 307 00:25:15,806 --> 00:25:16,724 only at night. 308 00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:18,475 What do you think about that? 309 00:25:18,809 --> 00:25:19,643 Nothing. 310 00:25:22,855 --> 00:25:25,399 Townspeople won't even work the Carfax estate. 311 00:25:25,816 --> 00:25:27,192 - Why? - They say it's haunted. 312 00:25:27,526 --> 00:25:29,611 - Would you please come in. - That place has been deserted 313 00:25:29,945 --> 00:25:31,864 for a long, long time. 314 00:25:32,573 --> 00:25:33,490 Yes. 315 00:25:35,159 --> 00:25:36,618 I have a surprise for everyone. 316 00:25:38,078 --> 00:25:39,204 We have a new neighbor, 317 00:25:40,372 --> 00:25:41,290 Count Dracula. 318 00:25:43,667 --> 00:25:45,544 I'd like you to meet my niece, Mina. 319 00:25:49,506 --> 00:25:50,424 Hello. 320 00:25:56,972 --> 00:25:59,516 - Irene Renfield, an old family friend. - Oh, shit. 321 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:03,312 One of my new interns, Dr. Bradley. 322 00:26:04,313 --> 00:26:06,023 Lucy Webster, Mina's college friend. 323 00:26:09,193 --> 00:26:10,110 And of course, 324 00:26:11,904 --> 00:26:13,447 my dear sister, Sybil. 325 00:26:13,781 --> 00:26:14,615 Don't. 326 00:26:14,948 --> 00:26:15,824 Don't. 327 00:26:17,951 --> 00:26:20,788 - The Count has just leased Carfax Abbey. - How charming. 328 00:26:21,121 --> 00:26:24,583 It'll be a relief to see some light in that dismal old place. 329 00:26:25,584 --> 00:26:26,502 Yes, indeed. 330 00:26:27,669 --> 00:26:30,005 Will you all excuse me? I have a telephone call. 331 00:26:30,672 --> 00:26:33,759 [moaning] 332 00:26:34,093 --> 00:26:34,843 Harder. 333 00:26:35,177 --> 00:26:38,388 [moaning] 334 00:26:38,722 --> 00:26:39,431 Come on. 335 00:26:39,765 --> 00:26:46,605 [moaning] 336 00:27:11,130 --> 00:27:11,964 Harder. 337 00:27:12,297 --> 00:27:15,509 [moaning] 338 00:27:15,843 --> 00:27:16,593 Come on. 339 00:27:16,927 --> 00:27:23,767 [moaning] 340 00:27:48,417 --> 00:27:49,251 Harder. 341 00:27:49,585 --> 00:27:52,671 [moaning] 342 00:27:53,005 --> 00:27:53,755 Come on. 343 00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:55,716 [moaning] 344 00:27:56,049 --> 00:27:58,677 The Abbey looks like it could use some repairs. 345 00:27:59,011 --> 00:28:00,512 I shall do very little. 346 00:28:01,180 --> 00:28:04,183 It reminds me of my castle in Transylvania. 347 00:28:05,392 --> 00:28:08,020 It reminds me of that poem from school, 348 00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:10,606 "Walls around were bare, 349 00:28:11,106 --> 00:28:12,733 as if the dead are there." 350 00:28:13,525 --> 00:28:15,527 [chuckles] That's a good toast, Lucy. 351 00:28:17,029 --> 00:28:17,946 There's more. 352 00:28:19,323 --> 00:28:22,117 "Let's cry for the next to die." 353 00:28:22,868 --> 00:28:24,536 Oh, Lucy, that's enough of that. 354 00:28:24,870 --> 00:28:25,621 Never mind the rest. 355 00:28:25,954 --> 00:28:26,955 To die, 356 00:28:28,248 --> 00:28:29,374 to be really dead. 357 00:28:31,126 --> 00:28:32,669 It must be glorious. 358 00:28:37,466 --> 00:28:38,383 Why, Count? 359 00:28:39,968 --> 00:28:43,222 There are far worse things awaiting man than death. 360 00:28:44,181 --> 00:28:51,104 [moaning] 361 00:29:02,783 --> 00:29:03,700 Harder. 362 00:29:04,034 --> 00:29:05,077 [moaning] 363 00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:06,620 Attention, attention. 364 00:29:06,954 --> 00:29:09,498 Dr. Van Helsing, long distance from Amsterdam. 365 00:29:09,831 --> 00:29:16,672 [moaning] 366 00:29:39,987 --> 00:29:40,821 Harder. 367 00:29:41,154 --> 00:29:44,366 [moaning] 368 00:29:44,700 --> 00:29:45,450 Come on. 369 00:29:45,784 --> 00:29:52,624 [moaning] 370 00:30:16,773 --> 00:30:17,607 Harder. 371 00:30:17,941 --> 00:30:19,234 Paging Dr. Stoker. 372 00:30:19,860 --> 00:30:21,486 [moaning] 373 00:30:21,820 --> 00:30:22,571 Come on. 374 00:30:22,904 --> 00:30:29,703 [moaning] 375 00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:37,502 Oh, Lucy. Yes, you're very romantic. 376 00:30:37,836 --> 00:30:38,628 You mean that? 377 00:30:39,046 --> 00:30:40,964 I find him fascinating. 378 00:30:43,258 --> 00:30:45,260 Yeah. I think so, too, a little bit. 379 00:30:45,594 --> 00:30:48,180 I think that you could use someone a little more normal. 380 00:30:48,513 --> 00:30:49,931 Oh, like your John? 381 00:30:51,099 --> 00:30:53,268 No, but like Dr. Bradley. 382 00:30:53,602 --> 00:30:54,436 He's sweet. 383 00:30:55,187 --> 00:30:56,897 But I like a more distinguished type. 384 00:30:57,230 --> 00:30:59,775 The more distinguished type will get you in trouble. 385 00:31:00,359 --> 00:31:07,282 [ominous music] 386 00:31:50,409 --> 00:31:57,332 [growling] 387 00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:28,363 [moaning] [growling] 388 00:33:44,940 --> 00:33:45,857 [barking] 389 00:33:50,737 --> 00:33:53,031 Why the hell did I have to come here? 390 00:33:53,782 --> 00:33:58,078 I sure could use Cognac... or a Quaalude. 391 00:33:58,411 --> 00:34:05,252 [moaning] 392 00:34:15,637 --> 00:34:16,471 Harder. 393 00:34:16,805 --> 00:34:19,975 [moaning] 394 00:34:20,308 --> 00:34:21,059 Come on. 395 00:34:21,393 --> 00:34:28,233 [moaning] 396 00:34:52,841 --> 00:34:53,675 Harder. 397 00:34:54,009 --> 00:34:57,220 [moaning] 398 00:34:57,554 --> 00:34:58,305 Come on. 399 00:34:58,638 --> 00:35:05,437 [moaning] 400 00:35:30,003 --> 00:35:30,837 Harder. 401 00:35:31,171 --> 00:35:32,005 [moaning] 402 00:35:34,966 --> 00:35:38,595 Dr. Stoker, report to Room 22 for a lobotomy. 403 00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:41,973 If I catch him messing around with any of the ladies around here, 404 00:35:42,307 --> 00:35:45,143 I'm gonna give him a frontal lobotomy for free. 405 00:35:49,189 --> 00:35:53,026 I could swallow his cock whole, balls and all. 406 00:35:53,360 --> 00:36:00,158 [orchestral music] 407 00:36:11,002 --> 00:36:17,926 [moaning] 408 00:38:13,666 --> 00:38:20,590 [howling] 409 00:38:20,924 --> 00:38:22,592 [chirping] 410 00:38:23,843 --> 00:38:30,767 [bats flying] 411 00:38:53,540 --> 00:38:54,374 Good morning. 412 00:38:54,707 --> 00:38:56,584 [rooster crowing] - Breakfast is now being served. 413 00:38:56,960 --> 00:38:58,378 Don't forget your rubber spoons. 414 00:38:58,711 --> 00:39:00,880 I laid in bed for quite a while, reading, and 415 00:39:01,506 --> 00:39:03,174 just as I was feeling drowsy, 416 00:39:03,508 --> 00:39:05,468 I heard the dogs howling. 417 00:39:06,427 --> 00:39:09,848 And then this white, livid face came down out of the fog, 418 00:39:11,933 --> 00:39:14,435 and I could feel this breath on my face, 419 00:39:16,145 --> 00:39:17,897 and then I felt its lips. 420 00:39:19,023 --> 00:39:19,858 John. 421 00:39:20,191 --> 00:39:21,359 You were only dreaming. 422 00:39:22,485 --> 00:39:23,820 I felt so weak. 423 00:39:24,445 --> 00:39:27,073 It seems like the life had been drained out of me. 424 00:39:29,492 --> 00:39:31,578 Mina, it was all a dream. 425 00:39:31,911 --> 00:39:35,498 Was there anything that might have caused that dream, Mina? 426 00:39:35,999 --> 00:39:36,833 No. 427 00:39:37,166 --> 00:39:38,251 Attention, Dr. Stoker. 428 00:39:38,585 --> 00:39:40,795 Ms. Lucy Webster is not in her room. 429 00:39:41,212 --> 00:39:44,173 [soft music] 430 00:40:06,779 --> 00:40:07,697 Van Helsing. 431 00:40:08,239 --> 00:40:09,157 Van Helsing. 432 00:40:11,284 --> 00:40:12,410 Van Helsing, I found her. 433 00:40:12,911 --> 00:40:14,787 Van Helsing, I found her. 434 00:40:17,916 --> 00:40:23,296 [gibberish] 435 00:40:23,630 --> 00:40:24,881 Come on, spit it out. 436 00:40:25,214 --> 00:40:32,138 [stammering] 437 00:40:36,809 --> 00:40:37,727 What? 438 00:40:41,064 --> 00:40:42,190 Dr. Bradley! 439 00:40:42,899 --> 00:40:44,359 Dr. Bradley! 440 00:40:48,821 --> 00:40:55,703 [eerie music] 441 00:41:09,509 --> 00:41:12,595 [singing] Swing low, 442 00:41:13,429 --> 00:41:17,433 sweet chariot, 443 00:41:17,809 --> 00:41:22,981 coming for to carry me home. 444 00:41:23,648 --> 00:41:26,109 Swing low, 445 00:41:26,901 --> 00:41:30,363 sweet chariot, 446 00:41:30,947 --> 00:41:35,743 coming for to carry me home. 447 00:41:36,703 --> 00:41:39,956 Well, if you get there 448 00:41:40,415 --> 00:41:43,668 before I do, 449 00:41:44,002 --> 00:41:48,923 coming for to carry me home. 450 00:41:49,465 --> 00:41:52,301 Tell all of my friends 451 00:41:52,635 --> 00:41:55,638 I'm coming, too, 452 00:41:56,347 --> 00:42:00,935 coming for to carry me home. 453 00:42:02,103 --> 00:42:05,356 Swing low, 454 00:42:05,857 --> 00:42:09,902 sweet chariot, 455 00:42:10,695 --> 00:42:16,576 coming for to carry me home. 456 00:42:16,951 --> 00:42:20,204 Swing low, 457 00:42:20,621 --> 00:42:24,959 sweet chariot, 458 00:42:25,585 --> 00:42:29,881 coming for to carry me 459 00:42:30,381 --> 00:42:37,305 home. 460 00:42:37,847 --> 00:42:44,520 [dramatic orchestral music] 461 00:42:44,854 --> 00:42:46,647 - Dr. Seward? - Yes. 462 00:42:47,023 --> 00:42:50,234 When did Ms. Webster have the last transfusion? 463 00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:52,445 About four hours ago. 464 00:42:54,447 --> 00:42:55,364 Unnatural, 465 00:42:56,699 --> 00:42:57,825 this loss of blood, 466 00:42:58,659 --> 00:42:59,952 waxy skin. 467 00:43:00,286 --> 00:43:01,120 Yes, indeed. 468 00:43:01,454 --> 00:43:04,165 Victim's mouth and eye are bloodless. 469 00:43:10,963 --> 00:43:12,840 On the breast, two marks. 470 00:43:15,218 --> 00:43:18,262 Steady, Dr. Bradley, hold back the tears. 471 00:43:19,097 --> 00:43:20,181 Don't be a cry baby. 472 00:43:21,682 --> 00:43:23,976 Attention, we have some morphine missing. 473 00:43:26,687 --> 00:43:27,772 Dr. Bradley? 474 00:43:28,106 --> 00:43:29,023 Yes. 475 00:43:31,567 --> 00:43:33,528 We are too soon old. 476 00:43:34,070 --> 00:43:34,987 Too late. 477 00:43:37,240 --> 00:43:38,116 You tell him, 478 00:43:39,033 --> 00:43:40,159 you make him understand. 479 00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:42,078 I can't. 480 00:43:45,039 --> 00:43:46,415 It's all over, John. 481 00:43:47,917 --> 00:43:49,460 Our love, our life together. 482 00:43:51,587 --> 00:43:52,505 I love you, 483 00:43:53,673 --> 00:43:56,259 but I can't help what's going on. 484 00:43:56,592 --> 00:43:58,344 It's your fault, Professor. 485 00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:00,263 You are driving her crazy. 486 00:44:00,805 --> 00:44:02,098 The sun goes down, 487 00:44:03,432 --> 00:44:04,559 another night will come. 488 00:44:06,435 --> 00:44:07,812 That you should be afraid of. 489 00:44:09,856 --> 00:44:11,440 So we see it again. 490 00:44:11,899 --> 00:44:14,068 Chronic constipation. 491 00:44:15,778 --> 00:44:19,866 Attention, Nurse Lawson. If you can, bring your enema Kit. 492 00:44:20,783 --> 00:44:22,160 Well, hello, Mr. Harker. 493 00:44:23,953 --> 00:44:24,871 How are you? 494 00:44:26,581 --> 00:44:27,498 Not good. 495 00:44:27,832 --> 00:44:28,749 What's your problem? 496 00:44:30,293 --> 00:44:32,879 Things aren't going well between Mina and I at all. 497 00:44:33,254 --> 00:44:34,088 Not at all. 498 00:44:34,422 --> 00:44:35,715 Well, what's wrong? 499 00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:38,634 Among other things, 500 00:44:38,968 --> 00:44:40,845 can you imagine what it would be like 501 00:44:41,304 --> 00:44:44,974 to be engaged to a woman for three years who's a virgin? 502 00:44:46,142 --> 00:44:48,352 No, Mr. Harker, I don't think I could. 503 00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:50,396 - Come with me. - You want me in that cab? 504 00:44:50,730 --> 00:44:52,190 Yes, I want you in this cab. 505 00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:56,027 You think this'll take my mind 506 00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:57,653 - off my troubles? - Oh, yes. 507 00:44:58,404 --> 00:45:00,364 You're one beautiful woman, you know that? 508 00:45:00,698 --> 00:45:04,118 [jazzy music] 509 00:45:04,452 --> 00:45:06,287 Just relax, Mr. Harker. 510 00:45:12,418 --> 00:45:14,503 [moaning] My God. 511 00:45:17,089 --> 00:45:19,717 You're rapidly making me forget all my troubles. 512 00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:25,514 Come on, Kiss me. 513 00:45:25,848 --> 00:45:26,766 Let's get comfortable. 514 00:45:27,600 --> 00:45:31,687 I want you to promise me, first of all, that no one finds out about this. 515 00:45:32,230 --> 00:45:33,606 Oh, Jonathan, 516 00:45:35,107 --> 00:45:37,443 you have my professional confidence 517 00:45:37,777 --> 00:45:40,029 that no one will find out. - Okay, we have a deal. 518 00:45:49,956 --> 00:45:51,874 - You know what you're doing, huh? - Oh, yes. 519 00:45:52,208 --> 00:45:53,918 I know exactly what I'm doing. 520 00:45:55,544 --> 00:46:02,426 [moaning] 521 00:46:10,601 --> 00:46:11,602 Let me help you there. 522 00:46:18,484 --> 00:46:19,402 Attention. 523 00:46:19,860 --> 00:46:23,114 Attention, Dr. Stoker, Baby Jane is refusing to wear her diaper. 524 00:46:28,035 --> 00:46:34,959 [moaning] 525 00:46:53,311 --> 00:46:54,145 Oh, my God. 526 00:46:54,478 --> 00:46:56,147 If Mina ever found out about this... 527 00:46:56,731 --> 00:46:57,940 Mina won't find out. 528 00:46:58,983 --> 00:47:04,238 [moaning] 529 00:47:04,572 --> 00:47:05,614 Fuck. 530 00:47:07,616 --> 00:47:09,118 Oh, my God. 531 00:47:10,119 --> 00:47:12,163 Just what the doctor ordered. 532 00:47:20,212 --> 00:47:21,922 Where are you going, Baby Jane? 533 00:47:22,465 --> 00:47:24,008 Baby Jane, come back. 534 00:47:26,427 --> 00:47:27,345 Attention. 535 00:47:27,762 --> 00:47:30,097 Dr. Seward is missing the 536 00:47:30,431 --> 00:47:33,517 Anyone knowing of its whereabouts, please return it to the pool room. 537 00:47:37,146 --> 00:47:44,070 [eerie music] 538 00:47:49,033 --> 00:47:50,743 Baby Jane, come here. 539 00:48:03,506 --> 00:48:05,424 I want your clit, my dear. 540 00:48:09,011 --> 00:48:15,935 [moaning] [soaring orchestral music] 541 00:50:39,954 --> 00:50:41,247 Dr. Sybil Seward, 542 00:50:41,580 --> 00:50:44,833 your brother would like to see you in his office as soon as possible. 543 00:50:47,753 --> 00:50:48,796 Dearest sister, 544 00:50:50,297 --> 00:50:53,676 why was Count Dracula invited for tea last night? 545 00:50:54,593 --> 00:50:57,263 Why shouldn't Count Dracula have been invited for tea 546 00:50:57,596 --> 00:50:58,556 last night, Arthur? 547 00:50:58,889 --> 00:51:01,141 Because I don't like the effect he has on Mina. 548 00:51:01,475 --> 00:51:02,309 Plus, 549 00:51:02,643 --> 00:51:08,190 any decisions involving the sanitarium do not make, unless you consult me first. 550 00:51:08,524 --> 00:51:09,441 I mean, for God's sake, 551 00:51:09,775 --> 00:51:11,277 what is going on around here? 552 00:51:11,610 --> 00:51:13,529 All this talk about vampires. 553 00:51:13,862 --> 00:51:16,532 My staff doesn't listen to me anymore. 554 00:51:16,865 --> 00:51:21,203 My best intern, Dr. Stoker, 555 00:51:21,579 --> 00:51:23,872 has been ending up like all my other patients. 556 00:51:24,206 --> 00:51:27,209 I'm going to lose my license, the whole thing is going to fall apart. 557 00:51:27,543 --> 00:51:29,712 I can't take it anymore. I mean, what am I going to do? 558 00:51:30,045 --> 00:51:31,463 I mean, I worked so hard at this place. 559 00:51:31,797 --> 00:51:34,174 No, I cant, I don't want to lose my sanitarium. 560 00:51:34,508 --> 00:51:35,593 You know I don't want to lose it? 561 00:51:35,926 --> 00:51:37,803 - You know I don't want to lose it. - Arthur, calm down. 562 00:51:38,137 --> 00:51:39,305 I just don't want to lose everything. 563 00:51:39,638 --> 00:51:40,347 - I can't lose everything. - Arthur. 564 00:51:40,681 --> 00:51:43,392 - I mean, this is everything I worked for. - Arthur. Arthur! 565 00:51:43,892 --> 00:51:46,270 Arthur! Look at me, Arthur. 566 00:51:53,110 --> 00:51:56,280 Now, Arthur, calm down. 567 00:51:58,449 --> 00:52:00,826 Arthur... 568 00:52:04,538 --> 00:52:07,499 remember how you liked this so much, Arthur? 569 00:52:17,635 --> 00:52:18,552 Come on. 570 00:52:19,595 --> 00:52:20,429 Come on, take it. 571 00:52:20,763 --> 00:52:22,514 You know you'd like to take it, Arthur. 572 00:52:23,891 --> 00:52:24,808 Come on. 573 00:52:25,309 --> 00:52:26,226 Come on. 574 00:52:27,102 --> 00:52:27,936 Come on. 575 00:52:28,270 --> 00:52:29,104 Yes. 576 00:52:30,105 --> 00:52:31,315 Yes. 577 00:52:32,358 --> 00:52:39,281 [moaning] 578 00:52:46,622 --> 00:52:47,915 This is what you like. 579 00:52:48,290 --> 00:52:53,003 [moaning] You like that? 580 00:52:53,337 --> 00:52:54,713 Oh, look at me. 581 00:52:55,047 --> 00:52:55,881 Yes. 582 00:52:56,465 --> 00:53:03,389 [moaning] 583 00:53:04,098 --> 00:53:11,021 [thunder rumbling] 584 00:53:16,443 --> 00:53:20,197 It could have been your cock. Mother gave it to me. 585 00:53:21,949 --> 00:53:24,702 I want to stick it in. 586 00:53:25,035 --> 00:53:25,953 I want to stick it in you. 587 00:53:27,663 --> 00:53:28,831 You want to put it in me? 588 00:53:29,415 --> 00:53:32,084 Yes, you like to do that, don't you? 589 00:53:32,418 --> 00:53:39,258 [moaning] 590 00:53:46,348 --> 00:53:47,558 Arthur needs that, you know. 591 00:53:47,891 --> 00:53:54,732 [moaning] I know he does. 592 00:55:31,537 --> 00:55:33,914 Jesus Christ, 593 00:55:34,456 --> 00:55:35,958 IS incest best? 594 00:55:39,002 --> 00:55:45,926 [moaning] 595 00:55:46,343 --> 00:55:49,972 Arthur's going to come onto his sister's breasts. 596 00:55:51,056 --> 00:55:52,599 - You know that, don't you? - Yes. 597 00:55:52,933 --> 00:55:54,184 Squeeze them together. 598 00:55:54,518 --> 00:55:55,352 Squeeze them. 599 00:55:55,686 --> 00:55:59,481 - Come on, Arthur. - Squeeze them tight, right there. 600 00:56:01,108 --> 00:56:03,527 Oh, yes, here we come. 601 00:56:03,861 --> 00:56:10,659 [moaning] 602 00:56:43,108 --> 00:56:46,236 There will be no more static about Count Dracula. 603 00:56:46,570 --> 00:56:47,404 Of course. 604 00:56:48,822 --> 00:56:50,657 Now that we're feeling better, Arthur -- 605 00:56:51,283 --> 00:56:52,701 and we are feeling better -- 606 00:56:54,119 --> 00:56:55,537 we have a lot of work to do. 607 00:56:56,371 --> 00:56:57,289 Yes, you're right. 608 00:56:57,956 --> 00:56:59,791 We're going to pull ourselves together 609 00:57:01,376 --> 00:57:03,086 and take care of business, 610 00:57:04,379 --> 00:57:05,297 right, Arthur? 611 00:57:05,714 --> 00:57:06,632 That's right. 612 00:57:07,633 --> 00:57:08,550 Very well. 613 00:57:14,306 --> 00:57:17,684 Arthur is on the verge of a nervous breakdown. 614 00:57:19,019 --> 00:57:21,063 Real schmuck. 615 00:57:21,438 --> 00:57:23,523 I advise you to come back in a couple of weeks 616 00:57:23,857 --> 00:57:26,068 when his condition might've improved. 617 00:57:26,401 --> 00:57:27,277 Oh, Count. 618 00:57:28,028 --> 00:57:28,946 Good evening. 619 00:57:30,656 --> 00:57:31,573 Count Dracula, 620 00:57:32,074 --> 00:57:33,283 Professor Van Helsing. 621 00:57:33,659 --> 00:57:34,743 Van Helsing? 622 00:57:35,869 --> 00:57:38,789 We know the name, even in Transylvania. 623 00:57:39,498 --> 00:57:41,625 You're most kind, Count. 624 00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:43,335 Count, Arthur told us 625 00:57:43,669 --> 00:57:46,588 of your very kind offer to give Mina your blood. 626 00:57:47,297 --> 00:57:50,467 I wanted to help in any way that I could, of course. 627 00:57:50,842 --> 00:57:52,636 Would you like to do it now or later? 628 00:57:53,053 --> 00:57:54,262 Now would be fine. 629 00:57:55,347 --> 00:57:56,264 Excuse me. 630 00:57:59,685 --> 00:58:02,229 Tell me, Count, is this your first transfusion? 631 00:58:03,105 --> 00:58:04,022 Yes. 632 00:58:04,898 --> 00:58:08,110 And I am a little squeamish about giving blood. 633 00:58:09,069 --> 00:58:13,240 Perhaps you will permit me to gaze into your eyes. 634 00:58:13,573 --> 00:58:20,414 [eerie music] 635 00:59:44,915 --> 00:59:51,797 [growling] 636 01:00:10,107 --> 01:00:11,316 Before you go, 637 01:00:12,359 --> 01:00:13,985 can you help, Count? 638 01:00:14,319 --> 01:00:15,153 Yes, of course. 639 01:00:15,487 --> 01:00:17,948 I would be happy to help in any way that I could. 640 01:00:18,365 --> 01:00:22,327 The other evening, I stumbled on the most amazing thing. 641 01:00:25,330 --> 01:00:29,876 [eerie music] [growling] 642 01:00:32,963 --> 01:00:35,757 Forgive me, I dislike mirrors. 643 01:00:38,301 --> 01:00:40,053 Van Helsing will explain 644 01:00:40,804 --> 01:00:43,890 The one who has not lived even a single lifetime, 645 01:00:45,433 --> 01:00:46,601 but a wise man, 646 01:00:47,269 --> 01:00:48,186 doctor. 647 01:00:53,150 --> 01:00:54,818 A vampire has struck. 648 01:00:55,360 --> 01:00:56,528 What are you talking about? 649 01:00:56,862 --> 01:01:00,949 A vampire casts no shadow in a mirror. 650 01:01:01,283 --> 01:01:03,034 Surely, Professor, you're not trying to say -- 651 01:01:03,368 --> 01:01:06,955 The strength of a vampire is his prick. 652 01:01:07,289 --> 01:01:14,171 [growling and howling] 653 01:01:23,346 --> 01:01:24,431 Nurse, go down 654 01:01:24,764 --> 01:01:26,808 and check on Dr. Stoker's condition, please. 655 01:01:27,267 --> 01:01:29,978 I'll get Dr. Bradley to go down. I have a few things that -- 656 01:01:30,312 --> 01:01:32,939 I am the one who's running the sanitarium, not you! 657 01:01:33,273 --> 01:01:35,901 Go down and check on Dr. Stoker, and take Henry with you. 658 01:01:36,985 --> 01:01:38,778 What a sick bastard. 659 01:01:39,112 --> 01:01:45,994 [background noise] 660 01:01:51,958 --> 01:01:54,044 Ha-ha, Big Dick is sick. 661 01:01:55,879 --> 01:01:56,922 Hello, Nurse Lawson. 662 01:01:57,380 --> 01:01:58,465 How are you, Dr. Stoker? 663 01:01:58,798 --> 01:02:00,508 Oh, I'm just fine. Thank you. 664 01:02:02,219 --> 01:02:04,846 Why don't you get rid of him, and I can talk to you. 665 01:02:06,264 --> 01:02:08,892 You can leave now. I think I can handle it from here. 666 01:02:11,144 --> 01:02:13,021 Let me see those nasty bite marks. 667 01:02:14,397 --> 01:02:15,523 Oh, those look painful. 668 01:02:17,484 --> 01:02:18,401 They itch a lot. 669 01:02:19,069 --> 01:02:21,196 I really shouldn't be shackled like this. 670 01:02:21,863 --> 01:02:25,325 I just went a little crazy when Aunt May bit me, 671 01:02:25,659 --> 01:02:26,701 but I'm okay now. 672 01:02:27,661 --> 01:02:29,329 Why don't you just let one arm loose, 673 01:02:29,663 --> 01:02:34,626 so I can be more comfortable and maybe scratch myself here? 674 01:02:35,377 --> 01:02:36,253 Okay? 675 01:02:36,586 --> 01:02:38,463 - Well, let me release you then. - Oh, good. 676 01:02:38,838 --> 01:02:39,756 One arm. 677 01:02:43,134 --> 01:02:44,427 [screaming] Oh, help! 678 01:02:44,761 --> 01:02:51,601 [growling] [screaming] 679 01:03:06,241 --> 01:03:11,913 It involves sexual penetration, mixing his semen with her blood. 680 01:03:12,247 --> 01:03:13,581 Why must Mina be the one? 681 01:03:13,915 --> 01:03:15,417 It's her only hope. 682 01:03:16,084 --> 01:03:18,712 Tonight, Dracula will attempt this ritual. 683 01:03:19,796 --> 01:03:26,720 [wolf howling] 684 01:03:50,368 --> 01:03:52,245 Why are you looking at me so strangely? 685 01:03:53,663 --> 01:03:54,539 I don't know. 686 01:03:55,999 --> 01:03:56,916 You changed. 687 01:03:57,834 --> 01:03:59,252 You're still beautiful, though. 688 01:04:00,045 --> 01:04:02,130 [laughing] - Oh, yes? 689 01:04:02,464 --> 01:04:03,923 I was really worried about you. 690 01:04:04,674 --> 01:04:06,134 Oh, John, 691 01:04:07,802 --> 01:04:09,346 look at the stars. 692 01:04:11,306 --> 01:04:12,932 John, look at the stars. 693 01:04:15,268 --> 01:04:16,728 The stars are beautiful. 694 01:04:21,858 --> 01:04:22,734 What's wrong? 695 01:04:23,401 --> 01:04:24,319 Nothing. 696 01:04:24,944 --> 01:04:25,862 Nothing's wrong. 697 01:04:28,740 --> 01:04:29,949 I love the night. 698 01:04:33,370 --> 01:04:37,499 It's the only time when I really feel alive. 699 01:04:38,750 --> 01:04:45,673 [soft music] 700 01:04:47,133 --> 01:04:49,010 You should go back to your own country. 701 01:04:50,678 --> 01:04:54,599 I'm going to stay here, where I am needed. 702 01:04:55,433 --> 01:04:56,351 You are too late. 703 01:04:57,143 --> 01:04:59,979 My blood is mingled with Mina's. 704 01:05:00,313 --> 01:05:04,025 I don't want to save Mina's soul, but her life. 705 01:05:04,359 --> 01:05:11,157 [eerie music] 706 01:05:16,413 --> 01:05:19,332 You have a strong will, Van Helsing. 707 01:05:20,458 --> 01:05:21,376 So long. 708 01:05:27,715 --> 01:05:29,426 Well, watch, it's that big, grey bat. 709 01:05:29,759 --> 01:05:31,094 Back in the house, it'll get tangled in your hair. 710 01:05:31,428 --> 01:05:32,595 Go on, get out of here. 711 01:05:33,263 --> 01:05:34,973 - Go, go. - Yes, Master. 712 01:05:35,598 --> 01:05:37,267 - I will, Master, I promise. - What? 713 01:05:39,269 --> 01:05:40,103 Nothing. 714 01:05:40,437 --> 01:05:41,229 What did you say? 715 01:05:42,063 --> 01:05:42,981 Nothing. 716 01:05:43,731 --> 01:05:44,649 Nothing, John. 717 01:05:48,695 --> 01:05:49,946 Attention, attention. 718 01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:53,700 Dr. Van Helsing, please return the crucifix to the chapel. 719 01:06:23,688 --> 01:06:25,648 It's Mina whom Dracula lusts for. 720 01:06:26,483 --> 01:06:29,861 After all, she is the only pure soul here. 721 01:06:31,029 --> 01:06:33,823 I want to warn her, but... what the hell? 722 01:07:06,481 --> 01:07:13,363 [eerie music] 723 01:07:28,336 --> 01:07:35,218 [heavy breathing] 724 01:07:52,360 --> 01:07:53,778 Van Helsing! Oh, my God. 725 01:08:05,290 --> 01:08:06,416 Jesus Christ. 726 01:08:12,797 --> 01:08:13,715 Let's go. 727 01:08:15,675 --> 01:08:21,764 [screaming] 728 01:08:22,098 --> 01:08:28,896 [soft piano music] 729 01:13:58,184 --> 01:13:59,936 Dracula has his new queen. 730 01:14:00,895 --> 01:14:04,565 Despite the sexual terror of his reign, I see Mina. 731 01:14:04,899 --> 01:14:07,818 She's found eternal sexual passion with her master. 732 01:14:09,153 --> 01:14:11,280 As for the rest of us mere mortals, 733 01:14:12,073 --> 01:14:14,241 we must be content with our one night stands. 734 01:14:15,284 --> 01:14:16,243 C'est la vie. 735 01:14:16,577 --> 01:14:23,125 [orchestral music] 736 01:14:23,459 --> 01:14:24,418 No, John. 737 01:14:24,961 --> 01:14:26,671 It's best that we part, John. 738 01:14:27,380 --> 01:14:28,756 Bonsoir, John. 739 01:14:29,298 --> 01:14:34,637 Auf Wiedersehen, au revoir, adios, 740 01:14:35,096 --> 01:14:36,013 aloha.