1 00:00:12,887 --> 00:00:14,848 [espresso machine spitting] 2 00:00:14,889 --> 00:00:17,767 [liquid pouring] 3 00:00:17,809 --> 00:00:21,438 - * Well, sometimes I go out by myself * 4 00:00:21,479 --> 00:00:25,483 * And I look across the water * 5 00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:27,068 Whoo-hoo! - Scheisse! 6 00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:30,196 - * And I think of all the things, what you're doing * 7 00:00:30,238 --> 00:00:34,159 * And in my head, I'll paint a picture * 8 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:35,535 - Hey--ugh. 9 00:00:35,577 --> 00:00:38,204 - * Oh, since I've come on home * 10 00:00:38,246 --> 00:00:40,582 * Well, my body's been a mess * 11 00:00:40,623 --> 00:00:45,879 * And I miss your ginger hair and the way you like to dress * 12 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:47,672 * Won't you come on over? * 13 00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:52,302 * Stop making a fool out of me * 14 00:00:52,344 --> 00:00:56,056 * Why don't you come on over, Heidi? * 15 00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:58,266 [Amy Winehouse's "Valerie"] 16 00:00:58,308 --> 00:01:01,353 * Heidi * 17 00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:02,854 [upbeat music] 18 00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:05,899 * Heidi * 19 00:01:05,940 --> 00:01:07,567 * * 20 00:01:07,609 --> 00:01:11,029 * Heidi * 21 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,447 * Hei-- * 22 00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:14,824 [notification chimes] 23 00:01:17,118 --> 00:01:18,078 [notification chimes] 24 00:01:18,119 --> 00:01:19,996 - * Ba ba ba ba ba * 25 00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:22,082 - Snap out of it, Bumper! 26 00:01:22,123 --> 00:01:25,669 - I shower before bed so I'm always clean when I get in it. 27 00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,504 Therefore, my sheets are always clean 28 00:01:27,545 --> 00:01:29,589 because the body in them is clean. 29 00:01:29,631 --> 00:01:33,051 So by transitive property, I never have to wash my sheets. 30 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,678 - Ah. - I do not shower. 31 00:01:34,719 --> 00:01:37,138 I trust my sexual partners to lick me clean. 32 00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:40,141 - Gross. - That's a lot of trust. 33 00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:41,351 - Hello! 34 00:01:41,393 --> 00:01:44,396 A very equal hello to all of you. 35 00:01:44,437 --> 00:01:47,607 Individually, I am greeting you all individually, 36 00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:49,150 and no one more than the other. 37 00:01:52,153 --> 00:01:53,488 Hello, Hodie. 38 00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:55,365 I didn't realize you were going to be here today. 39 00:01:55,407 --> 00:01:56,616 - Uh, you didn't-- 40 00:01:56,658 --> 00:01:59,202 did you just call me Hodie? - Did I? 41 00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:01,329 - Yeah. - You know what I think it is? 42 00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:03,248 It's 'cause I think about you so infrequently, 43 00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:05,333 it wasn't, like, on the tip of my tongue. 44 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:06,793 I sometimes forget it. It's not Hodie? 45 00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:09,129 - It's Heidi. - OK, now it's back. 46 00:02:09,170 --> 00:02:10,547 - Why wouldn't Heidi be here? 47 00:02:10,588 --> 00:02:12,465 - Yeah, they were all on the text thread. 48 00:02:12,507 --> 00:02:13,842 - OK, why are we hashing this out right now? 49 00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:16,302 Let's just get down to business 'cause I, for one, 50 00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:18,930 am here for a business meeting, so... 51 00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:21,307 - Well. [clears throat] I called you here 52 00:02:21,349 --> 00:02:22,726 to discuss our strategy 53 00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:25,103 for the Unity Day auditions tomorrow. 54 00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,605 [echoing] First things first... 55 00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:30,734 - Heidi, you have a little eyelash. 56 00:02:30,775 --> 00:02:31,568 - Oh, I do? 57 00:02:31,609 --> 00:02:33,153 - Do you mind if I get it? 58 00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:36,531 - Yeah, sure, OK. 59 00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:39,034 - Actually, no, it's just a shadow cast 60 00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:40,118 on your perfectly symmetrical-- 61 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,161 - Bumper! - Hmm? 62 00:02:41,202 --> 00:02:42,662 - Focus up! - Yep. 63 00:02:42,704 --> 00:02:43,788 - We've been preparing for this day for months now. 64 00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:45,832 - Work mode. Focus up! 65 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:47,417 Getting focused. 66 00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:50,211 You know what, I need to feng shui this place 67 00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:51,338 real quick. - What? 68 00:02:51,379 --> 00:02:52,797 - For me it's like an energy thing 69 00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:53,965 in here right now, if you guys could just switch places? 70 00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:55,258 - OK. - Yeah. 71 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:56,676 You go over there. Thank you. - Sit here? 72 00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:58,178 - Sit right where you're at. - Don't move Sebastian. 73 00:02:58,219 --> 00:02:59,763 - To me, this works better. 74 00:02:59,804 --> 00:03:01,264 That's a really good spot, right there. 75 00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:02,265 Carry on. 76 00:03:02,307 --> 00:03:04,225 - OK. 77 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:05,560 Yeah? - Yep. 78 00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:12,567 - Let's go over our likely panel of judges one more time. 79 00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:14,194 Our toughest judge will be-- 80 00:03:14,235 --> 00:03:15,362 - OK, I know this one. 81 00:03:15,403 --> 00:03:18,990 Um, uh, not my feet, but my Hans. 82 00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:20,909 - Yes, Hans Schroeder. 83 00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:22,619 His incisive critique is so sharp, 84 00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:25,038 they call him Edward Scissor-Hans. 85 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:26,331 - Scissor-Hans, that's funny. 86 00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:29,417 - [gasps] Bumper! 87 00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:31,127 Yogurt? - That's not mine. 88 00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:32,671 - Nein! 89 00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:33,963 - Ow! - It wasn't mine. 90 00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:35,757 - For the next 24 hours, I don't want your throat 91 00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:38,176 anywhere near dairy. Understood? 92 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:39,594 - I have to be totally honest. 93 00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:42,097 I eat an ice cream sundae every morning for breakfast. 94 00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:43,264 - What? - You know what? 95 00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:44,683 I'll downgrade to a bowl of sprinkles 96 00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:46,101 if it'll help me perform better. 97 00:03:46,142 --> 00:03:48,645 - It will, and thank you. - You have got this, Bumper. 98 00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:50,355 We've been doing everything right. 99 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:51,815 Your songs are popular. 100 00:03:51,856 --> 00:03:53,650 That scrappy little video that we made-- 101 00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:55,902 without Klaus's help, thank you very much-- 102 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:56,986 it's a hit, booboo. 103 00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,405 You've got this. You've got real fans. 104 00:03:58,446 --> 00:03:59,989 - [giggles] - And besides... 105 00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:00,990 - She called me booboo. 106 00:04:01,032 --> 00:04:02,409 - Other than Gisela, 107 00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:05,578 this is basically your newcomer competition-- 108 00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:07,706 the Oppenheimer Family Band. 109 00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:10,083 - Ugh, I hate family bands. 110 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:13,336 It's cheating to start a band with the people you invented. 111 00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:14,921 - Also, they're stupid. - Ugh. 112 00:04:14,963 --> 00:04:16,339 - You've got a great shot tomorrow, Bumper. 113 00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:18,591 All you need to do is focus up. 114 00:04:18,633 --> 00:04:21,094 - Yeah, no, totally ficus up. 115 00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:23,346 [dreamy music] 116 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:26,516 * * 117 00:04:26,558 --> 00:04:27,934 - What the [bleep] are you doing? 118 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:28,852 - Hmm? 119 00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:33,648 - * Bow bow bow bow bow * 120 00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:36,192 * Bum bum bum * 121 00:04:36,234 --> 00:04:38,737 * Bum bum bum * 122 00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:43,450 - I cannot believe you brought us here, Pieter. 123 00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:45,660 This is the best restaurant in Berlin. 124 00:04:45,702 --> 00:04:48,705 - This is Bumper's last meal before he's a superstar. 125 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:50,749 Food will taste different to him after tomorrow. 126 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:53,835 - Ooh, isn't that not my feet, but my Hans? 127 00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:54,919 - Yep. 128 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:58,256 - Oh, yeah, that is Hans Schroeder, 129 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,550 the Unity Day judge. Wow. 130 00:05:00,592 --> 00:05:03,011 How strange that he is at his favorite restaurant 131 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:04,971 on his anniversary, which I discovered 132 00:05:05,013 --> 00:05:07,223 by poring over marriage announcements 133 00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:09,768 on newspaper microfiche. What? 134 00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:12,854 - You devious little minx of a manager. 135 00:05:12,896 --> 00:05:15,774 This was your plan all along, wasn't it? 136 00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:17,108 Sorry, I'm not good at winking. 137 00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,527 - OK, I'm going to go put in a good word for you. 138 00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:20,945 You sit tight. 139 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,906 I'll hit you with a signal if he wants to meet. 140 00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:26,368 [clears throat] 141 00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:29,662 - What--what's the signal? 142 00:05:29,704 --> 00:05:31,331 We'll figure it out. 143 00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:32,791 - Hans, hello. 144 00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,876 Welcome to me, Pieter Kramer. 145 00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:36,503 And please say hello and welcome 146 00:05:36,544 --> 00:05:38,254 to Bumper Allen over there. 147 00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:39,756 - Hi, Hans! 148 00:05:39,798 --> 00:05:43,009 - Yes, you will be hearing him with your ears tomorrow. 149 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:45,261 - Ah, yes. 150 00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:47,472 I'm seeing Bumper Allen at last. 151 00:05:48,973 --> 00:05:50,016 - What do you think? 152 00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:51,393 Why don't we just skip those auditions 153 00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:53,353 and just get this guy booked, right? 154 00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,479 I'm kidding, of course. 155 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,772 Unless that is possible? 156 00:05:55,814 --> 00:05:58,316 - This is the artist formally known as Prawns. 157 00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,318 [all laughing] Like Prince. 158 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,736 - The judging committee feels-- 159 00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:03,697 [glass shatters] - Oh, son of a--God dang it! 160 00:06:03,738 --> 00:06:05,740 All right, we'll just-- will these sop it up? 161 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,158 It's not sopping it. - I don't know. 162 00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,451 - Miss, hi. 163 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:10,286 Can I get a T-shirt from the gift shop? 164 00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:12,205 - No. - Interesting. 165 00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:13,707 Cracker Barrel has a gift shop. 166 00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:16,084 - The judging committee feels Bumper 167 00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:19,170 is not the best representative of what Germany has to offer. 168 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,297 Then there's you, Pieter. 169 00:06:21,339 --> 00:06:23,299 Your name is still too toxic. 170 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,343 Your personal failings-- 171 00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:28,972 how do I say this in a kind way? 172 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:31,057 You make our genitals shrivel up with rage 173 00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:32,142 at your music crimes. 174 00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:33,727 - But I'll just be behind the scenes. 175 00:06:33,768 --> 00:06:35,353 You won't even know I'm there. 176 00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,022 I can duck in the crowd if that helps? 177 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:39,774 - I'm sorry, but we just can't be involved in all that. 178 00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:41,943 Bumper is not going to get an audition. 179 00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,908 - It's all over. This was my last chance. 180 00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:51,578 - I'm sure there's something else, some other concert. 181 00:06:51,619 --> 00:06:52,996 - That makes no difference. 182 00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:55,582 Try as I might, I clearly will never outrun my shame. 183 00:06:55,623 --> 00:06:57,417 - OK, guys, I think we need 184 00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,085 to take a chillaxative, all right? 185 00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:01,588 I will catch up to Hans and smooth this whole thing out. 186 00:07:01,629 --> 00:07:04,257 - You just don't know when to stop, do you? 187 00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:07,302 I was trying to help you make a good impression with Hans, 188 00:07:07,344 --> 00:07:08,928 but you just made us all look bad. 189 00:07:11,514 --> 00:07:13,433 - You're blaming me? - Yeah. 190 00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:16,644 You're like a bumper car, just bouncing and crashing 191 00:07:16,686 --> 00:07:18,772 into everyone without a care in the world, 192 00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:20,690 treating Germany like your private playground, 193 00:07:20,732 --> 00:07:22,359 which, by the way, is a public playground 194 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,652 because Germany is a wonderful place to raise a family. 195 00:07:24,694 --> 00:07:26,154 - Oh, yeah? Well, we would have still been in there 196 00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:28,740 eating fancy seafoam if you hadn't turned 197 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,867 the whole industry against us with your cheating! 198 00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:33,119 - Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on now, OK? 199 00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:35,747 So no Unity Day. So what? 200 00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,290 We'll just keep working on Bumper's career 201 00:07:37,332 --> 00:07:38,625 like we have been. 202 00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:40,543 Easy-peasy. We can figure this out. 203 00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:42,629 - No, we won't, Heidi. 204 00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:45,965 Not every problem can be solved by being perky and optimistic. 205 00:07:46,007 --> 00:07:47,425 - Yes, they can. 206 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:50,553 - Oh, I am so tired of humoring you two all the time! 207 00:07:50,595 --> 00:07:51,638 - Pieter, hold on. 208 00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:52,722 - Is that what you have been doing 209 00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,849 all of these years, humoring me? 210 00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:57,560 Is managing me some sort of pity thing for you? 211 00:07:57,602 --> 00:07:58,645 - Well, it definitely wasn't because 212 00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:00,146 of the money I was making. 213 00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:02,732 Oh, God, I'm better off moving to the country 214 00:08:02,774 --> 00:08:05,819 and cutting off sheep testicles like my ancestors. 215 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,195 I resign as a manager. 216 00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:08,780 - What? - Fine! 217 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:11,074 Then I pre-emptively fire you as my manager. 218 00:08:11,116 --> 00:08:12,742 - Thea, are you going to say anything? 219 00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:13,952 - I'm staying out of this. 220 00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:15,829 I don't care. - Oh, of course you don't. 221 00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:16,913 - You never care about anything. 222 00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:19,249 - Let's just hash this out real quick. 223 00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:21,626 - I'm sorry, Bumper. 224 00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:23,670 But everyone's just out for themselves. 225 00:08:23,712 --> 00:08:25,839 You could've stayed in America for that. 226 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:27,257 You never should have come here. 227 00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:30,051 [somber music] 228 00:08:30,093 --> 00:08:36,558 * * 229 00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:44,566 - [singing in German] 230 00:08:44,607 --> 00:08:46,443 [soft upbeat music] 231 00:08:46,484 --> 00:08:48,236 - What shall we toast to? 232 00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:50,947 The German law that states freedom 233 00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:52,574 is a basic human dignity? 234 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:55,243 - Whatever. Does it matter? 235 00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:57,120 My friends hate me and each other, 236 00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:58,329 and all my dreams are dead. 237 00:08:58,371 --> 00:08:59,956 - Oh, dreams are what your brain does 238 00:08:59,998 --> 00:09:01,332 when it's being lazy. 239 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,877 - [laughs] Yeah, that's true. 240 00:09:06,171 --> 00:09:07,380 - Ah. 241 00:09:07,422 --> 00:09:10,133 - [gulps] Ooh, I didn't like that. 242 00:09:10,175 --> 00:09:12,052 I didn't like that. 243 00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,179 I'll take a lemon drop. 244 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,056 But hold the sugared rim. 245 00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:18,641 Since I no longer have to worry about working hard 246 00:09:18,683 --> 00:09:21,227 or pursuing my dreams, I can dedicate my life 247 00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:22,896 to drinking and being sad, 248 00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:26,232 which is very close to my dream of drinking and being happy. 249 00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:27,650 Donk-ee. 250 00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:30,320 - That reminds me of when the wall was constructed 251 00:09:30,362 --> 00:09:31,821 through the middle of my schoolyard. 252 00:09:31,863 --> 00:09:34,532 It happened so quickly that many of my friends 253 00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,659 were suddenly just on the other side. 254 00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:38,286 I never saw them again. 255 00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,789 [air rushing] 256 00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:41,998 - What? 257 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,667 I'm sorry, I didn't hear what you just said. 258 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:47,003 But on top of losing the chance at Unity Day 259 00:09:47,045 --> 00:09:50,006 and everyone turning on each other, 260 00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:51,383 the real kicker, 261 00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:54,135 even Heidi said I shouldn't have come to Germany. 262 00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,889 I really care for her. 263 00:09:57,931 --> 00:10:02,060 If that's how she feels, there's nothing I can do. 264 00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:06,189 - Well, Bumper, only dead fish go with the flow. 265 00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:07,524 [toilet flushes] 266 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:09,567 - [coughs] 267 00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:11,486 You are so wise. 268 00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:14,030 You're right. This can't be it. 269 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,615 There has to be something I could do. 270 00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:17,909 - Oh, I was speaking about a dire problem 271 00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,536 regarding the hostel's plumbing, 272 00:10:19,577 --> 00:10:22,747 but I'm glad it also applies here. 273 00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:27,627 - Hans! 274 00:10:29,671 --> 00:10:33,049 German Unity Day Judge Hans Schroeder, 275 00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:36,052 I know you live here, 'cause the internet told me. 276 00:10:36,094 --> 00:10:39,139 I couldn't find a boombox at this time of the night, 277 00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:41,766 but luckily, I got the greatest boombox 278 00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,518 of all time right here, 279 00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:45,020 my dang mouth. 280 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:49,024 * I'll be there for you * 281 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:52,986 * These five words I swear to you * 282 00:10:53,028 --> 00:10:56,823 [mumbling] * I'll be here for you * 283 00:10:56,865 --> 00:11:01,077 * I'll be there for you * 284 00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:02,454 [dogs howling] 285 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,664 * Hans! * 286 00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:09,002 Give me a chance, man! 287 00:11:09,044 --> 00:11:13,465 I was put on this Earth to be a song and dance man. 288 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:18,219 Hans! [scoffs] 289 00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:22,057 Uh, you think I messed everything up? 290 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:25,518 Well, I'll show you how I can... 291 00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:27,062 [unzipping] Mess things up. 292 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:28,813 [upbeat music] 293 00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:30,023 Ah. 294 00:11:30,065 --> 00:11:32,317 Draw a little eighth note for you. 295 00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,028 Uh-oh, here comes the crescendo. 296 00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:37,447 [siren wailing] 297 00:11:37,489 --> 00:11:39,449 Oh, no. 298 00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:42,077 [zips] 299 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:43,286 I'm sorry, officers. 300 00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,705 There was a miscommunication-- 301 00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:52,253 I can't believe I'm going to the slammer. 302 00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:55,674 Now Martha Stewart and I have two things in common. 303 00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:59,052 I also think the secret is in the marinade. 304 00:11:59,094 --> 00:12:00,512 - The only slammer you will be going to 305 00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:03,056 is the one that slams you with medicine and nice care-- 306 00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:04,182 the hospital. 307 00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,142 - In Germany, we take drunk people 308 00:12:06,184 --> 00:12:09,187 to the hospital for a thorough health evaluation. 309 00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:11,314 We rehydrate them, hmm? 310 00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:14,693 So their hangovers are not too severe and send them home. 311 00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,194 - Are you crazy? 312 00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:19,030 I can't go to the hospital. I don't have any money. 313 00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:20,824 [both laughing] 314 00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:23,493 - You silly lemon-lipped man! 315 00:12:23,535 --> 00:12:25,328 The hospital is free, of course. 316 00:12:25,370 --> 00:12:28,832 - God damn, that shit's funny. - [chortles] 317 00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:31,376 - What good is amazing free healthcare 318 00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:35,880 and the humane treatment of the drunken and disorderly 319 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:38,091 if you don't have anyone to share it with? 320 00:12:38,133 --> 00:12:41,052 [somber music] 321 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,847 * * 322 00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:46,808 * Lay a whisper * 323 00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:49,853 * On my pillow * 324 00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:52,856 * Leave the winter * 325 00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:55,817 * On the ground * 326 00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:58,737 both: * I wake up lonely * 327 00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:01,906 * There's air of silence * 328 00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:04,743 * In the bedroom, ooh * 329 00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:05,994 - * And all around * 330 00:13:06,036 --> 00:13:08,038 - * And all around * 331 00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:10,540 - * Touch me now * [Bumper beatboxing] 332 00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:13,460 * I close my eyes * 333 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:16,046 - * And dream away * - * Dream away * 334 00:13:16,087 --> 00:13:19,007 all: * Dream away * 335 00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:20,759 - * It must have been love * 336 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:21,843 all: * Must've been love * 337 00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:24,304 - * But it's over now * 338 00:13:24,346 --> 00:13:27,724 all: * But it's over now * - * It must have been good * 339 00:13:27,766 --> 00:13:30,727 * But I lost it somehow * 340 00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:33,730 * It must have been love * all: * Must've been love 341 00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:36,566 - * But it's over now * 342 00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:39,736 * It must have been love * 343 00:13:39,778 --> 00:13:42,572 [Roxette's "It Must Have Been Love"] 344 00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:47,369 * * 345 00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:48,787 - I'm going to need another. 346 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:51,623 - The doctors told me to cut you off. 347 00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:52,957 - Please? 348 00:13:57,587 --> 00:13:59,297 Thank you. 349 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,299 I know you're probably busy 350 00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:03,968 and don't want to hear about my devastating heartbreak, 351 00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:05,804 both professional and personal. 352 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:09,140 But I could really use someone to chat with. 353 00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:11,434 - You have complimentary personalized stationery 354 00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:12,852 next to your bed. 355 00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:14,979 Perhaps you can put your feelings there. 356 00:14:17,399 --> 00:14:19,025 - Wait, my Jell-O! 357 00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:28,284 "Dear Hans, 358 00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:31,621 eat my butt." 359 00:14:31,663 --> 00:14:34,165 OK, and that one's done. 360 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:37,002 [crumpling paper] 361 00:14:42,632 --> 00:14:45,760 "Dear Heidi. 362 00:14:49,848 --> 00:14:52,851 Hey, you." 363 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,319 [sentimental music] 364 00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:08,616 * * 365 00:15:08,658 --> 00:15:12,412 You have been so supportive of me. 366 00:15:12,454 --> 00:15:14,873 And honestly, I don't know if I deserve it. 367 00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:19,502 I don't know if I deserve any of you. 368 00:15:19,544 --> 00:15:23,882 I know you said I shouldn't have come here, but... 369 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,301 it is one of the best decisions I've ever made. 370 00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,764 I came to this strange place. 371 00:15:33,099 --> 00:15:36,394 But little did I know, I was coming home to you. 372 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,235 That was good. 373 00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:47,197 [machine beeping] 374 00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:52,077 [tapping] 375 00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:55,246 [percussive rhythm] 376 00:15:55,288 --> 00:16:01,920 * * 377 00:16:32,409 --> 00:16:33,785 - * My way home * 378 00:16:35,245 --> 00:16:38,540 * I'm on my way home * 379 00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:45,005 How long have you been here? 380 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:47,507 - Your emergency contact was a Jersey Mike's 381 00:16:47,549 --> 00:16:49,092 in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. 382 00:16:49,134 --> 00:16:51,594 - No, that's my friend, Jersey Mike. 383 00:16:51,636 --> 00:16:53,471 - His first name is Jersey? 384 00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,390 - Yeah. - OK. 385 00:16:55,432 --> 00:16:57,642 Well, anyway, they found me under recent calls, 386 00:16:57,684 --> 00:16:59,936 so here I am. 387 00:16:59,978 --> 00:17:03,773 Um, Bumper, I'm so sorry. 388 00:17:03,815 --> 00:17:06,526 I was just frustrated and embarrassed. 389 00:17:06,568 --> 00:17:07,569 You didn't deserve it. 390 00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:11,614 - I'm so sorry too. 391 00:17:11,656 --> 00:17:13,867 I forgot how much you do for me 392 00:17:13,908 --> 00:17:16,995 and how much you've been through. 393 00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:21,041 So don't ever feel like you let me down 394 00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:24,210 because I'm the one who let us all down. 395 00:17:26,421 --> 00:17:30,633 Can you just tell Thea and Heidi that I'm sorry? 396 00:17:30,675 --> 00:17:32,010 - Tell them yourself. 397 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,096 - Thea and Heidi? 398 00:17:35,138 --> 00:17:37,015 Oh, my God--how long have I been here? 399 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:38,308 - [clears throat] 400 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:42,562 - Pieter texted you were having a rough time. 401 00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:43,897 - Oh, thank God. 402 00:17:43,938 --> 00:17:45,690 - So here we are. 403 00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:47,359 We all made up on the way. 404 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:50,653 - I promised Heidi I would care about three things a week. 405 00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:53,698 And so far, it's you and a cool bat I saw. 406 00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:54,991 - I feel honored. 407 00:17:55,033 --> 00:17:56,493 - And I apologized to Heidi 408 00:17:56,534 --> 00:17:58,661 for projecting my insecurities on her. 409 00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:01,748 She's been nothing but loyal, and I blew it. 410 00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:03,333 - And I apologize for nothing 411 00:18:03,375 --> 00:18:05,960 because I didn't do anything wrong. 412 00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:06,920 How's that for being less perky? 413 00:18:06,961 --> 00:18:08,004 - Ah. 414 00:18:08,046 --> 00:18:09,381 - That's really good. 415 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:13,385 - Bumper, um... 416 00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:16,471 I didn't mean what I said. 417 00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:18,556 I was just upset. 418 00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,850 I'm so glad you came here. 419 00:18:20,892 --> 00:18:23,353 [soft sentimental music] 420 00:18:23,395 --> 00:18:25,897 - I have never had friends like you guys before. 421 00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:28,483 In college, I got my appendix taken out. 422 00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:31,569 Treblemakers didn't even send me flowers. 423 00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,905 To be fair, I did just dox all of them 424 00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:36,366 for singing out of tune. 425 00:18:36,408 --> 00:18:37,867 No future senators in that crew. 426 00:18:37,909 --> 00:18:39,202 [chuckles] 427 00:18:39,244 --> 00:18:41,246 A lot of dudes, a lot of buttholes. 428 00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:42,872 A lot of butthole photos. 429 00:18:42,914 --> 00:18:45,417 That wasn't my best or my worst. 430 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:48,253 I've done some horrible things. 431 00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:53,508 I'm also sorry about what I said and did and peed. 432 00:18:53,550 --> 00:18:56,886 - Well, no matter what, we all have each other. 433 00:18:56,928 --> 00:18:58,930 [machine beeping increases] 434 00:18:58,972 --> 00:19:00,140 - Shall we spring you? 435 00:19:00,181 --> 00:19:02,600 - Yep, grab all the free shit you can. 436 00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:05,270 [soft upbeat music] 437 00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:07,313 - Hey, free coat rack. 438 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,691 Oh, shit! We got a leaker! 439 00:19:09,733 --> 00:19:11,776 Hey, I know Unity Day's already ruined, 440 00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,278 but there is a silver lining. 441 00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:15,113 I wrote a pretty good song. 442 00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:16,489 all: You wrote a song? 443 00:19:16,531 --> 00:19:18,950 - Yeah, why are we so surprised? 444 00:19:25,081 --> 00:19:27,542 [sentimental music] 445 00:19:27,584 --> 00:19:29,461 - * I am turn, turning * 446 00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:32,464 * Into something different than before * 447 00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:34,299 * 'Cause every turn I'm turning * 448 00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:36,801 * Takes me to your door * 449 00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:43,725 * What if far and away doesn't feel so far? * 450 00:19:46,978 --> 00:19:48,563 [all applauding] 451 00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:51,066 - Wow. That was incredible, Bumper. 452 00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:53,109 I mean it. None of us thought you could do that, 453 00:19:53,151 --> 00:19:54,736 never in a million years. 454 00:19:54,778 --> 00:19:56,696 - Making art from your pain, huh? 455 00:19:56,738 --> 00:19:58,448 You really are a Berliner. 456 00:19:58,490 --> 00:19:59,741 - It seems like you were listening 457 00:19:59,783 --> 00:20:01,785 when I taught you how to write a song. 458 00:20:01,826 --> 00:20:05,413 - Well, I had a pretty great teacher. 459 00:20:05,455 --> 00:20:07,457 - More bitter rhubarb wine, anyone? 460 00:20:07,499 --> 00:20:08,541 - Sure. - Yes. 461 00:20:08,583 --> 00:20:09,751 - Let's get drunk again. 462 00:20:09,793 --> 00:20:11,086 What's the worst that could happen? 463 00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:12,879 They throw me back in the most glamorous hospital 464 00:20:12,921 --> 00:20:13,922 I've ever been in, 465 00:20:13,963 --> 00:20:15,924 and then all my best friends show up? 466 00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:19,260 - So now that we don't have any upcoming work events 467 00:20:19,302 --> 00:20:20,970 to plan for, 468 00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:24,557 maybe we should all just have a good time together. 469 00:20:24,599 --> 00:20:26,893 I think I'm hallucinating due to lack of sleep. 470 00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:29,854 I feel weirdly empowered by my distorted reality. 471 00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,481 I think I'm gonna run for office 472 00:20:31,523 --> 00:20:32,857 when all of this is over. 473 00:20:35,026 --> 00:20:36,361 Uh, cheers. 474 00:20:36,403 --> 00:20:37,362 - Cheers. - Yes. 475 00:20:37,404 --> 00:20:38,947 - OK, I'd vote for you. 476 00:20:38,988 --> 00:20:40,907 - Oh, thanks. 477 00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:43,326 [coughs] Seriously, what is in this? 478 00:20:43,368 --> 00:20:46,955 - Rhubarb, salt, and rocks. 479 00:20:46,996 --> 00:20:49,457 - You know, I'm still really bummed about Unity Day. 480 00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:52,127 I feel like Berlin has given me so much. 481 00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:54,838 I just wish I could give back in some small way. 482 00:20:54,879 --> 00:20:56,673 - Well, I wish you could have the chance to get on stage 483 00:20:56,715 --> 00:20:58,675 at Unity Day to do just that. 484 00:21:00,218 --> 00:21:02,137 - That's all that you need? 485 00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:06,975 Don't you young people know a stage can be anything? 486 00:21:07,017 --> 00:21:09,060 I once performed an entire production 487 00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:11,563 of "Die Fledermaus" on the back of a hearse. 488 00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:13,523 - Wait, Ursula, 489 00:21:13,565 --> 00:21:15,483 are you saying all the world's a stage, 490 00:21:15,525 --> 00:21:17,068 and I'm a freaking player? 491 00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:18,903 [upbeat music] 492 00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:23,450 Guys, I think we gotta give Berlin a little prezzy. 493 00:21:23,491 --> 00:21:27,370 * * 494 00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:31,458 - Luckily for us, my apartment building has a kickass roof. 495 00:21:31,499 --> 00:21:33,752 - Here are the speakers you requested. 496 00:21:33,793 --> 00:21:36,087 My friend Heinrich said we can borrow them. 497 00:21:36,129 --> 00:21:38,256 He's owed me a favor ever since I lent him 498 00:21:38,298 --> 00:21:39,966 one of my cleverest ravens 499 00:21:40,008 --> 00:21:43,178 when he had to solve that witch's riddle. 500 00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:44,888 - All right, Bumper, ready? 501 00:21:44,929 --> 00:21:47,432 My--wee-wee!--fingers are getting tired. 502 00:21:47,474 --> 00:21:51,811 - OK, any advice as my manager before I play? 503 00:21:51,853 --> 00:21:53,063 - No. 504 00:21:53,104 --> 00:21:55,357 But as your friend, blow the freaking windows 505 00:21:55,398 --> 00:21:56,524 out of Berlin! 506 00:21:56,566 --> 00:21:58,193 Oh, and as a volunteer fireman, 507 00:21:58,234 --> 00:21:59,527 please stay away from the edge. 508 00:22:02,614 --> 00:22:04,157 - Nervous. 509 00:22:04,199 --> 00:22:06,242 Guten tag, Berlin! 510 00:22:06,284 --> 00:22:08,286 My name is Bumper Allen. 511 00:22:08,328 --> 00:22:10,163 Ick liebe dick. 512 00:22:10,205 --> 00:22:12,499 - Oh, no, a jumper! 513 00:22:12,540 --> 00:22:15,627 - Close--a Bumper. 514 00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:21,591 [electric sentimental music] 515 00:22:21,633 --> 00:22:26,930 * * 516 00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:29,432 * I'm walking streets that do not know me * 517 00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:34,229 * Passing signs all trying to show me the way back home * 518 00:22:34,270 --> 00:22:36,231 * The way back home * 519 00:22:36,272 --> 00:22:39,693 * A strange man feeling ever more strange * 520 00:22:39,734 --> 00:22:43,321 * And still trying to find a way back home * 521 00:22:43,363 --> 00:22:45,490 * A way back home * 522 00:22:45,532 --> 00:22:47,367 * I am turn, turning * 523 00:22:47,409 --> 00:22:50,203 * Into something different than before * 524 00:22:50,245 --> 00:22:52,455 * 'Cause every turn I'm turning * 525 00:22:52,497 --> 00:22:54,791 * Takes me to your door * 526 00:22:54,833 --> 00:23:01,548 * What if far and away doesn't feel so far? * 527 00:23:01,589 --> 00:23:06,136 * What if home's wherever you are? * 528 00:23:06,177 --> 00:23:09,472 * I'm already home if I'm where you are * 529 00:23:09,514 --> 00:23:12,684 [crowd cheering] 530 00:23:19,691 --> 00:23:21,276 Thank you, Berlin! 531 00:23:21,317 --> 00:23:23,737 Enjoy your morning coffee! 532 00:23:23,778 --> 00:23:25,822 - Whoo! - That was beautiful, Bumper! 533 00:23:25,864 --> 00:23:27,615 I usually dislike love songs, OK? 534 00:23:27,657 --> 00:23:31,745 But I just imagined you were singing to a spider or a bat. 535 00:23:31,786 --> 00:23:34,205 - For sure. - I knew you had it in you. 536 00:23:34,247 --> 00:23:35,874 I'm going to say to you what my own father 537 00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:37,334 will never say to me. 538 00:23:37,375 --> 00:23:40,170 I am so proud of you, my son, Pieter Kramer, 539 00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:43,340 and I think you are smart enough to wear laced shoes. 540 00:23:43,381 --> 00:23:45,216 - OK. Yeah. 541 00:23:47,344 --> 00:23:48,720 - Uh-oh. 542 00:23:48,762 --> 00:23:51,181 - That's fine. I'll go freely. 543 00:23:51,222 --> 00:23:52,724 I will die for my music. 544 00:23:54,684 --> 00:23:56,394 - Thank you. 545 00:23:56,436 --> 00:23:58,021 Well, well, well. 546 00:23:58,063 --> 00:24:00,440 If it isn't Bumper Allen, which it is. 547 00:24:00,482 --> 00:24:02,650 We've been holding Unity Day auditions next door, 548 00:24:02,692 --> 00:24:06,071 and half of our acts left to watch you. 549 00:24:06,112 --> 00:24:07,822 I'm sure that wasn't a coincidence. 550 00:24:07,864 --> 00:24:09,824 - Nope, it wasn't. 551 00:24:09,866 --> 00:24:11,951 I figured if the auditions don't go to us, 552 00:24:11,993 --> 00:24:13,536 we'll go to the auditions. 553 00:24:13,578 --> 00:24:15,205 - Wait a second. 554 00:24:15,246 --> 00:24:16,790 This is not your apartment building? 555 00:24:16,831 --> 00:24:18,208 - Oh, hell no, dog. 556 00:24:18,249 --> 00:24:19,709 I just followed someone in because it's next door 557 00:24:19,751 --> 00:24:21,211 to the Unity Day offices. 558 00:24:21,252 --> 00:24:23,797 We rock and rolled and broke and entered. 559 00:24:23,838 --> 00:24:25,048 - Apparently loud in front of them. 560 00:24:25,090 --> 00:24:26,299 - Yeah, oops. 561 00:24:26,341 --> 00:24:28,802 - Well, it appears Berlin loves your song. 562 00:24:28,843 --> 00:24:30,136 I mean, a lot of those people were 563 00:24:30,178 --> 00:24:32,013 drunk from the night before, - I could tell. 564 00:24:32,055 --> 00:24:33,390 I was drunk when I wrote the song. 565 00:24:33,431 --> 00:24:34,974 - That's true. 566 00:24:35,016 --> 00:24:37,185 - But against all odds, you've generated genuine enthusiasm. 567 00:24:37,227 --> 00:24:39,896 And you may still be a controversial figure, 568 00:24:39,938 --> 00:24:42,148 but it's clear you did a good job with Bumper. 569 00:24:42,190 --> 00:24:43,316 - Yes, he did. 570 00:24:43,358 --> 00:24:45,068 He's a great manager and a great friend. 571 00:24:45,110 --> 00:24:47,737 He knows all the coolest roofs to book me on 572 00:24:47,779 --> 00:24:49,322 and tells me when I have chocolate on my face, 573 00:24:49,364 --> 00:24:50,699 which is a lot. 574 00:24:50,740 --> 00:24:52,742 I eat a chocolate sundae every morning for breakfast. 575 00:24:52,784 --> 00:24:55,412 Classic style. - He does. He shares. 576 00:24:55,453 --> 00:24:57,205 Fine, we both do it. 577 00:24:57,247 --> 00:24:58,665 You've converted me. 578 00:24:58,707 --> 00:25:01,418 - It seems that our country has two deserving newcomer 579 00:25:01,459 --> 00:25:03,044 acts this year. 580 00:25:03,086 --> 00:25:04,754 We'd like to offer you the opportunity 581 00:25:04,796 --> 00:25:07,424 to share the spot with Gisela. 582 00:25:07,465 --> 00:25:09,884 For the first time, we can have two newcomers 583 00:25:09,926 --> 00:25:12,095 in the spirit of unity. 584 00:25:12,137 --> 00:25:13,471 - Yes. 585 00:25:13,513 --> 00:25:16,266 - In the spirit of unity. 586 00:25:16,307 --> 00:25:19,269 Mwah! 587 00:25:19,310 --> 00:25:20,812 I didn't know what to do. - It works. 588 00:25:20,854 --> 00:25:23,898 - I kind of freaked out. - That's fine. Toodles. 589 00:25:23,940 --> 00:25:27,110 [all screaming] 590 00:25:27,152 --> 00:25:28,194 - Oh, my God! 591 00:25:28,236 --> 00:25:30,196 Whoo! 592 00:25:30,238 --> 00:25:32,490 [all screaming] 593 00:25:32,532 --> 00:25:34,117 OK, but seriously, now we have to go because we 594 00:25:34,159 --> 00:25:35,285 did break and enter. - Yeah, OK, yep. 595 00:25:35,326 --> 00:25:36,411 - Oh, yeah. 596 00:25:36,453 --> 00:25:37,620 - Can we just leave everything? 597 00:25:37,662 --> 00:25:40,165 - Just throw it off the side! - OK. 598 00:25:40,206 --> 00:25:42,417 - Oh! I missed it! All right, listen, watch this. 599 00:25:42,459 --> 00:25:44,627 Oh, miss it, miss it, miss it. 600 00:25:44,669 --> 00:25:46,921 [all cheering] 601 00:25:46,963 --> 00:25:48,757 It only took me 15 tries. 602 00:25:48,798 --> 00:25:51,301 Man, hot dogs in Germany are so much more fun 603 00:25:51,343 --> 00:25:52,552 than hot dogs in America. 604 00:25:52,594 --> 00:25:55,263 I love slurping me down some German wieners. 605 00:25:55,305 --> 00:25:57,140 - I still can't believe that my client 606 00:25:57,182 --> 00:25:59,976 has secured the coveted newcomer spot at Unity Day. 607 00:26:00,018 --> 00:26:01,936 You are German like a Grimm brother. 608 00:26:01,978 --> 00:26:03,813 - Wilhelm. - Oh, yes. 609 00:26:03,855 --> 00:26:04,731 - Because I do not mess with Jacob. 610 00:26:04,773 --> 00:26:05,982 - Nasty. 611 00:26:06,024 --> 00:26:06,941 - Yeah, that guy's a psychopath. 612 00:26:06,983 --> 00:26:08,193 - Killed several sheep. 613 00:26:08,234 --> 00:26:09,319 - Man, I freaking love you, dude. 614 00:26:09,361 --> 00:26:10,695 - I love you as well. 615 00:26:14,199 --> 00:26:15,658 That was the first time ever doing that. 616 00:26:15,700 --> 00:26:16,868 - Oh, really? - It was terrible. 617 00:26:16,910 --> 00:26:18,161 I apologize. 618 00:26:18,203 --> 00:26:19,371 - We should, like, practice it or something. 619 00:26:19,412 --> 00:26:20,663 - Allow me to rehearse in the mirror 620 00:26:20,705 --> 00:26:22,165 for several hours tonight. 621 00:26:22,207 --> 00:26:24,501 - You don't have to. - OK. 622 00:26:24,542 --> 00:26:27,170 - I just can't believe we actually did it. 623 00:26:27,212 --> 00:26:28,922 - I can. 624 00:26:28,963 --> 00:26:30,840 I always knew you could. 625 00:26:30,882 --> 00:26:35,220 [sentimental music] 626 00:26:35,261 --> 00:26:37,222 - Heidi, I... 627 00:26:40,433 --> 00:26:43,353 - Bumper Allen. 628 00:26:43,395 --> 00:26:44,646 - Wow. 629 00:26:44,688 --> 00:26:46,856 News of Unity Day must travel fast. 630 00:26:46,898 --> 00:26:48,316 More fans already. 631 00:26:48,358 --> 00:26:50,902 I hope it's not nudes because I don't have my pen. 632 00:26:50,944 --> 00:26:52,362 - Bumper Allen, you are being deported 633 00:26:52,404 --> 00:26:53,738 by the German government. 634 00:26:55,407 --> 00:26:56,491 - Wait, what? 635 00:26:56,533 --> 00:26:59,452 [upbeat rock music] 636 00:26:59,494 --> 00:27:01,871 * * 637 00:27:01,913 --> 00:27:05,250 - *Scheisse! * 638 00:27:05,291 --> 00:27:06,876 * * 639 00:27:06,918 --> 00:27:09,546 *Scheisse! * 640 00:27:09,587 --> 00:27:11,923 * * 641 00:27:11,965 --> 00:27:14,551 *Scheisse! * 642 00:27:14,592 --> 00:27:16,928 * * 643 00:27:16,970 --> 00:27:19,556 *Scheisse! * 644 00:27:19,597 --> 00:27:22,058 * * 645 00:27:22,100 --> 00:27:24,269 *Scheisse! * 646 00:27:24,310 --> 00:27:27,022 * * 647 00:27:27,063 --> 00:27:29,607 *Scheisse! * 648 00:27:29,649 --> 00:27:32,110 * * 649 00:27:32,152 --> 00:27:34,946 *Scheisse! *