1
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:07,800
Tonight, grannies doing doughnuts.

2
00:00:08,280 --> 00:00:11,120
Is the new Mini any good?

3
00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:15,400
Ultimate force
in a reasonably-priced car.

4
00:00:15,880 --> 00:00:21,480
And the bed spring with a bike
engine takes on the Zonda.

5
00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:29,840
Hello. We're talking tonight
predominantly about style.

6
00:00:29,840 --> 00:00:36,680
<font color="
in the normal world thinks petrol
heads like us are a bit geeky,

7
00:00:36,680 --> 00:00:41,120
spending all day downloading stuff
off the internet.

8
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:46,080
So I've ditched the jeans tonight
and gone for a cargo-style pant,

9
00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:49,160
<font color="

10
00:00:49,160 --> 00:00:53,800
And you've teamed a tablecloth
with a shirt. Stitched in.

11
00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:58,680
And you're wearing a tent.
Tucked in. As usual.

12
00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:02,880
It's not just our attire.
We've rearranged the audience.

13
00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:07,360
<font color="

14
00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:07,360
here. Look at him. A male model.

15
00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:14,600
You're staying there. Get us a good
image. We've put the fat ugly
ones... Over there. At the back.

16
00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:17,800
Anyone with a spot. See this guy,

17
00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:24,760
<font color="
he is Robin Askwith out of
the window cleaner films. Yeah.

18
00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:29,280
Or Keith Emerson from Emerson,
Lake and Palmer. A hybrid.

19
00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:34,160
If the floor manager says, "Can you
move," it's cos you're ugly.

20
00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:37,480
<font color="

21
00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:44,400
It happens. We've also got
some car designers over there.
Look, they're all shiny.

22
00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:50,920
To be a car designer,
you have to wear black
and look like a Chechen rebel.

23
00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:54,000
<font color="

24
00:01:54,000 --> 00:02:01,320
Of course, we're not being helped
this week - the Motor Show -
they ran a commercial to go there.

25
00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:04,720
They used a semi-naked girl.

26
00:02:04,720 --> 00:02:10,800
And there were all sorts of
semi-naked girls in Birmingham.

27
00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:17,440
The woman who complained -
<font color="
something or other, Patricia Hewitt.

28
00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:21,080
She's quite fit, actually.
She is.

29
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:24,840
Maybe it's a power thing.
She's got something.

30
00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:29,680
But using sex to sell cars is
really very "last week" and uncool.

31
00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:32,440
<font color="

32
00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:38,080
Strangely, I can. News this week -
Transport 2000 - campaigning group.

33
00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:42,920
Mmm. Great name. Yeah. Two years
ago, it would've been great.

34
00:02:42,920 --> 00:02:47,520
Did they not see that coming in '99?
<font color="

35
00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:54,360
They're taking the Government to
court because they want them to stop
painting speed cameras yellow.

36
00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:59,200
They want them to be grey and hidden
to catch more motorists.

37
00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:03,840
I've got this. Transport 2000,
just so you know who they are.

38
00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:06,680
<font color="

39
00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:13,320
"Transport 2000's vision is where
traffic no longer dominates
our lives, where many journeys

40
00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:17,560
"can be made on foot or cycle
or public transport.

41
00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:21,680
"You don't need a car to enjoy
the countryside or city life."

42
00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:26,160
<font color="
I'm going to Newcastle. Do I walk?

43
00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:30,160
Places are far apart.
That's why we have cars.

44
00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:36,800
Let's get on. Whenever I pull over
for petrol, I guarantee
someone will walk over and say,

45
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:39,840
"Have you driven the new Mini yet?"

46
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:44,680
<font color="
Do you mind if I perch here?

47
00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:51,120
"What is it like?"
Not me, though. My question is,
"What on earth is an Aquadrome?"

48
00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:57,960
We've all driven up the M1 and seen
that brown sign that says Billing
Aquadrome. Turn-off 16, is it?

49
00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:03,000
<font color="
could kill two birds with one stone.

50
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:09,400
Take the new Mini up there,
find out what it's like
and find out what an Aquadrome is.

51
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:15,840
There are three types of Mini.

52
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:19,080
There's the supercharged Cooper S,

53
00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:24,520
the normal Cooper, and bottom of
<font color="

54
00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:29,760
£10,500 worth of simple,
end-of-the-pier, no-nonsense fun.

55
00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:32,800
A bit like Billing Aquadrome, then.

56
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,600
Turns out it's a caravan site.

57
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:40,400
Fun for all the family. Star turns
every night, go-karts in the day

58
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:43,960
<font color="
in the evening.

59
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:47,120
You can stay here in a caravan.

60
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,760
£9 a night. £9!

61
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:52,760
£11 if you want electricity.

62
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:58,080
And there's a choice of three
restaurants. All you can eat: £6.95.

63
00:04:58,080 --> 00:05:03,080
Come here, eat chips,
<font color="

64
00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:07,720
'60s living then,
to suit a '60s car.

65
00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:16,560
I was a huge fan of the old Mini
and I thought BMW would mess it up.
But they've actually improved it.

66
00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:21,160
The dash is brilliant.
I don't have my knees by my ears.

67
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:26,640
<font color="
time you run over a piece of grit.

68
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:30,600
It's a wonderful, comfortable car.
Brilliant!

69
00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:36,760
It now has some suspension, so
won't tackle corners like a go-kart.

70
00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:39,480
But you can still have fun with it.

71
00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:52,000
Some cars costing much more
<font color="

72
00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,800
You would love this car

73
00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:58,360
and you'd love it
when it was time to sell.

74
00:05:58,360 --> 00:06:04,280
Minis fetch more on the second-hand
market than they cost new.

75
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:09,160
Which model to buy? Let me give you
a Top Gear top tip.

76
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,760
<font color="

77
00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:17,160
It has the same overhead camshaft,
1.6-litre engine as the Cooper.

78
00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:22,080
The only difference is a tiny chip
in the on-board computer.

79
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:26,120
So, you buy the cheap car,
you save £1,300,

80
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,760
and then you change the chip.

81
00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:31,760
<font color="

82
00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:37,520
I just saved you £1,000!
But should you take me up on it?

83
00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:40,520
Should you buy a Mini at all?

84
00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:44,200
The wheel base on this car -

85
00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:48,760
the distance between the back
wheels and the front ones -

86
00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:53,040
is exactly the same
<font color="

87
00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:55,680
So where's all the space gone?

88
00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:59,560
There's tons in the front,
but in the back,

89
00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:03,560
there's absolutely no legroom
at all.

90
00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:07,120
And, while the new Mini
has a hatchback,

91
00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:09,840
look at the size of its boot.

92
00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:15,160
<font color="
to get 42 Boy Scouts in the back.

93
00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:19,120
We can't even get
one BBC sound recordist.

94
00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:23,000
We can't even get his leg
and he's not big!

95
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,640
That really is hopeless.

96
00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:28,240
If a Martian came to Earth,

97
00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:33,080
<font color="
normally get into a car this size -

98
00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:38,000
four doors, space for the family
and dog, he'd say, "What's a dog?"

99
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,640
Then when you'd explained, he'd say,

100
00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:44,440
"That's hopeless.
That's much more like it!"

101
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:47,640
It's the Toyota Yaris Verso.

102
00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:50,280
<font color="

103
00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:54,320
Smaller on the outside,
but look at the inside.

104
00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:58,960
Three full seats at the back
and look at that legroom.

105
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:05,600
What's more - these two outer seats
actually fold into the floor.
Let me show you.

106
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:09,240
<font color="

107
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:10,920
Ah!

108
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:13,520
There's some floor there.

109
00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:17,280
It just goes in there.
Bugger! Jesus!

110
00:08:17,280 --> 00:08:20,760
That's not going to go in.
Why's that?

111
00:08:20,760 --> 00:08:25,400
Um... Oh, hold on - I've found
another lever, catch thing.

112
00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:29,920
<font color="
this was meant to happen!

113
00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:33,360
I've no idea!
Let's try on the other side.

114
00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:38,720
That's what you trap
your fingers on. Be careful.

115
00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:41,960
The floor's still here.
There we go.

116
00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:45,680
That should just slide in smoothly.

117
00:08:45,680 --> 00:08:49,960
<font color="

118
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,560
Completely flat floor...

119
00:08:52,560 --> 00:08:54,800
Great!

120
00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:58,360
So, as a practical proposition,

121
00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:04,400
the Yaris Verso plainly knocks
the Mini into a cocked hat.

122
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:10,960
This really is - once you've got
the hang of it all -
a very practical car.

123
00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:15,960
<font color="
sophisticated than the Mini's motor

124
00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:18,560
so you get the same power.

125
00:09:18,560 --> 00:09:22,080
In here, you get a lot of toys.

126
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:28,240
It has air-conditioning as standard
and look at that 3D digital dash!

127
00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:30,800
That's Martian technology!

128
00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:36,320
Aimed at the young kid-about-town
<font color="

129
00:09:36,320 --> 00:09:39,240
it crushes the Mini like a beetle.

130
00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:45,160
And yet, something about it is not
quite right. Could it be the name?

131
00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:50,120
Yaris Verso - that sounds like
it could be a full-back at Arsenal!

132
00:09:50,120 --> 00:09:52,680
Or is it the styling?

133
00:09:52,680 --> 00:09:55,200
Yes, that's it.

134
00:09:55,200 --> 00:10:02,040
<font color="
except it looks like an ugly snake
that's swallowed a wardrobe!

135
00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:13,240
That's the thing - as a functional
car, THIS is much better than THIS.

136
00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:18,000
But when Madonna needed to buy
a new car, she bought a Mini.

137
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:22,400
So did Zoe Ball, Kate Moss,
<font color="

138
00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:25,040
They all bought Minis. Style sells!

139
00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:28,480
That's why engineers
are made these days

140
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:31,120
to work in cellars with little food.

141
00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:36,040
The superstars of the car world
are the designers. I have one here.

142
00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:41,480
Peter Horbury. He's the boss
<font color="

143
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:45,560
but you were best known
for turning Volvo

144
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:51,200
from making pea-green half-bricks
into...

145
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:54,640
Well, what?
Blue half-bricks, I suppose!

146
00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:57,280
I really like how this car looks.

147
00:10:57,280 --> 00:11:01,480
I think the function of Volvo
<font color="

148
00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:04,280
It was a safe, practical car.

149
00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:07,920
It's good to add style
to something functional.

150
00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:12,680
Here, we asked the designers to make
a car with the front of a sports car,

151
00:11:12,680 --> 00:11:17,040
and the back of a Ford Transit.
And that's what you've got.

152
00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:21,800
<font color="
is very curved and round and sporty.

153
00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:26,560
The screen pillars are angled in,
much more than the older Volvos.

154
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:31,320
And if you go down the car, you'll
see how the side glass pivots out.

155
00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:33,840
So when it gets to the luggage area,

156
00:11:33,840 --> 00:11:37,200
<font color="
it's still there.

157
00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:41,640
Add the vertical tailgate,
and you've got the boxy Volvo.

158
00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:44,240
But only where you need it.

159
00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:49,960
You're always saying you need
national characteristics in a car.

160
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,560
So this has to look Swedish.

161
00:11:52,560 --> 00:11:57,320
<font color="
gobbledegook. What is Swedish?

162
00:11:57,320 --> 00:12:02,080
Well, it's a caring society, so
everyone is looked after in a Volvo.

163
00:12:02,080 --> 00:12:06,120
They're also practical,
so we have the estate car.

164
00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:10,880
But you can also put the visual
character of a country into a car.

165
00:12:10,880 --> 00:12:15,640
<font color="
Let's see if you can still do this.

166
00:12:15,640 --> 00:12:20,880
Think back to the forties. A typical
British car was, from the front,

167
00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:25,640
very curvaceous, very round.
Lots of full, voluptuous shapes.

168
00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:29,680
That was typical of a car
anywhere in that era.

169
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:34,160
<font color="
They had simple verticals,

170
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:36,680
with a horizontal in between,

171
00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:40,040
and with the same shapes
on the grille.

172
00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:44,720
This is the Volvo 544. You don't
recognise it. No, I don't!

173
00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:49,000
<font color="
Oh, the Volvo 544.

174
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,520
It's a very different form.

175
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:55,160
Look at other products of the time,
like furniture.

176
00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:59,920
The British 1940s armchair had
the same form language as the car.

177
00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:02,440
<font color="

178
00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:05,800
It had the same simple shapes
and curves.

179
00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:10,560
That's how wood bends, so that's how
they built chairs. I'm spellbound!

180
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:13,200
That's like this one here. Yes.

181
00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:17,960
See the simple flat wood,
<font color="

182
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:22,720
Same form language. That is how we
designed the shoulders on the Volvo.

183
00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:26,400
Where many cars would grow outwards
and downwards,

184
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:31,160
the Volvo comes straight out, and
there's a big radius, like the chair.

185
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:34,720
<font color="
to make it look solid.

186
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:39,480
Well, it is a visual representation
of the side impact protection system.

187
00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:44,480
I suppose you can still see
the national characteristics a bit,

188
00:13:44,480 --> 00:13:50,520
in Jaguars and so on, but then
the Japanese have never had any...

189
00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:55,360
<font color="
A Japanese car is full of detail.

190
00:13:55,360 --> 00:14:00,640
Japanese people can single out
a detail and appreciate it.

191
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:05,400
Japanese houses are all different.
One is one size, the next isn't.

192
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:09,120
We see it as a visual mess,
we Westerners.

193
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:13,880
<font color="
individually. Really? Yeah.

194
00:14:13,880 --> 00:14:18,640
The page of a Japanese magazine is
mayhem to us. To them, it's simple.

195
00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:21,320
You look at one detail at a time.

196
00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:26,040
Your favourite car, I know,
<font color="

197
00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:30,840
Why? I think it's a lovely-looking
car, but not the best ever.

198
00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:36,160
Why do you think this is so good?
I think it's very, very significant.

199
00:14:36,160 --> 00:14:38,680
Don't forget, this is 1976,

200
00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:43,720
when other cars were folded-paper
<font color="

201
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:48,480
But this was new. Beautiful forms,
all rounded, almost aircraft-like.

202
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:52,520
It had the first integrated bumpers.
You could kick those.

203
00:14:52,520 --> 00:14:56,880
It's a pure design.
There's not a blemish on the surface.

204
00:14:56,880 --> 00:15:01,640
It's just pure form, and that was
<font color="

205
00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:06,600
And it lasted, didn't it? 20 years,
this lasted. Not many cars would.

206
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:10,280
Now, the interesting thing
about this car

207
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:16,120
is that when it came out, I believe
you were working at Ford. Yes.

208
00:15:16,120 --> 00:15:20,440
<font color="
certain elements of this car

209
00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:24,840
and put them onto a car you were
designing at the time. Right.

210
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:29,280
Does anyone want to guess
what car Peter, at the time,

211
00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:32,080
thought he'd made look like a 928?

212
00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:35,200
< Capri?

213
00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:35,200
<font color="

214
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:38,560
Ready?
This, you think, looks like a 928.

215
00:15:38,560 --> 00:15:43,560
Ahem, yes. That is a Ford Sierra XR4.

216
00:15:38,560 --> 00:15:43,560
LAUGHTER

217
00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:48,640
"God, that guy's got a Porsche!
No, wait, it's a Ford Sierra."

218
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:52,600
Which bit were you thinking of
<font color="

219
00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:58,000
The one detail in this particular
XR4, which is identical to this,

220
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,520
is the side windows.

221
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:05,440
Here was one of the most exquisite
forms in the automotive world, then.

222
00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:10,760
There's that almost aircraft-like
side window in that very clean door,

223
00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:14,600
<font color="
wrapover second window.

224
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,120
Yeah... Well, here it is!

225
00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:21,160
The front door window,
plus the second window.

226
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:25,920
We just painted that black
to create one shape... Yes...

227
00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:30,640
<font color="
If I stand back, will that help?

228
00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:35,440
If you half close your eyes, or even
fully close them, it helps a lot!

229
00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:38,840
Oh, I've got it now.
That's a 928, definitely.

230
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:42,880
For the moment, Peter,
<font color="

231
00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:46,240
No disrespect to Peter,
but I can't agree.

232
00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:50,280
Porsche 928 the best-looking car
in the world? No!

233
00:16:50,280 --> 00:16:55,840
If you ask me, this is.
It's the Citroen DS. It's gorgeous!

234
00:16:55,840 --> 00:17:00,080
But more importantly,
<font color="

235
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,960
Let me put that into perspective.

236
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:06,960
There you were in the '50s,
doing your laundry.

237
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:11,720
Then suddenly, someone gives you
one of these! It was mind-boggling!

238
00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:18,800
Imagine having the creativity

239
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:22,480
to sit down at your drawing board
<font color="

240
00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:26,920
when most cars still looked
like sideboards,

241
00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,680
and draw this as a car.

242
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:36,480
It's genius!

243
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:46,960
For me, and many others, this is
one of the most beautiful cars ever.

244
00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:51,800
It's so petite around the tail,
<font color="

245
00:17:51,800 --> 00:17:55,640
And towards the front,
it widens out to the nose.

246
00:17:55,640 --> 00:18:00,400
Those big, elegant eyes look feline.
Then there's this expanse of glass.

247
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:05,960
Half the car is so rakish, but when
you sit upright, it's so stately.

248
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:10,400
It's astonishing.
<font color="

249
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:15,160
12,000 people said, "I like that.
I'm going to buy one."

250
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:19,720
They sold 12,000
on the first day ever!

251
00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:28,560
Now, we're not being strictly honest
here,

252
00:18:28,560 --> 00:18:33,840
because this is a 1972 Citroen DS.
<font color="

253
00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:39,080
The car they introduced in 1955,
apart from a few cosmetic changes,

254
00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:45,560
was built for 20 years, until 1975.
So it must have got something right!

255
00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:49,640
By the '70s, it was cleverer.
Maybe too clever!

256
00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:54,000
The headlamps swivelled
<font color="

257
00:18:55,120 --> 00:19:00,600


258
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:06,920


259
00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:09,360


260
00:19:09,360 --> 00:19:14,280
It wasn't just the looks that were
futuristic, and boy, were they!

261
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:20,360
It was everything else. For example,
those looks come from aerodynamics,

262
00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:24,760
<font color="
to be akin to witchcraft.

263
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:27,680
Now, here's the really clever bit.

264
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:38,240
In the '50s, most of the world
was still using mangles.
This had disc brakes!

265
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:40,720
It had a hydraulic system

266
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:45,720
that controlled the suspension,
<font color="

267
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:51,560
and, in cars with a semi-automatic
transmission, the gear changes, too!

268
00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:54,080
All in 1955!

269
00:19:57,920 --> 00:20:02,240
I hate it when I drive old cars.
I really want one.

270
00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,760
I think I'm getting
the hang of this now.

271
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:11,520
<font color="
but it's just a bit different.

272
00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:15,440
Once you have got the hang of it,
it's great.

273
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:18,880
I'm in the wrong gear,
but it's great.

274
00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:32,840
Hmm. I'm not convinced.
I quite like the car - quite,

275
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:38,120
<font color="
That's the problem for me.

276
00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:44,320
They wouldn't put a traffic cone on
their head and reel down the street.
That's the point.

277
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:51,720
You're missing the point.
You're the man who has consistently
won Britain's Worst-Dressed Man.

278
00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:56,960
<font color="
on a makeover programme now.

279
00:20:56,960 --> 00:21:00,680
It's a car that you're just missing.
Later on,

280
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:04,720
I'll show you what I think
is the best-looking car.

281
00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:08,760
I don't like it. You don't know
<font color="

282
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:13,520
Previously, we tried to prove that
not all old people are bad drivers.

283
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:18,280
We invited grannies to come in and
help us. We had lots of responses.

284
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:22,160
So we picked these five ladies
to have a go.

285
00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:26,200
<font color="
Granny Doughnut Challenge.

286
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:30,120
These are the grannies,
and the car they'll drive

287
00:21:30,120 --> 00:21:33,480
is the sporty rear-wheel drive
Honda S2000.

288
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:37,040
Oh, it's gorgeous.
So you like it? Yes, I do.

289
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:40,520
<font color="

290
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:40,520
LAUGHTER

291
00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:43,560
Why would I go in the back?

292
00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:47,960
'But before the doughnuts,
it was cake time.'

293
00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:51,000
You spread it over with lard,

294
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:56,240
and then put your layers of mixed
fruit and cinnamon and sugar in.

295
00:21:56,240 --> 00:22:01,000
<font color="
the market, because it's home-made.

296
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:05,000
Can I get my bramble jelly there?
You can.

297
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:09,760
The man who'll be teaching them
is ace stunt driver Russ Swift.

298
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:13,480
Approach it slowly.
It's not a fast manoeuvre.

299
00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:17,520
<font color="
as if going in a circle,

300
00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:22,280
then dip the clutch, build the revs
up and spin the back wheels.

301
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:25,320
And what'll happen then...

302
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:30,560
Chalk is no substitute for burning
rubber, as Russ demonstrates.

303
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,720
TYRES SCREECH

304
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:39,800
Ooh!

305
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:45,040
<font color="
ha-ha-ha!

306
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:47,600
Easy-peasy! Do it again!

307
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:54,920
Did you bring
your incontinence pads?! No!

308
00:22:54,920 --> 00:23:01,320
We've seen how you're meant
to do it. We'll see how
they got on, later.

309
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:06,240
<font color="
trying that. I can't wait.

310
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:11,360
But we'll have to, because each
week we have a celebrity guest.

311
00:23:11,360 --> 00:23:16,400
It's time to meet him - the star

312
00:23:11,360 --> 00:23:16,400
of Ultimate Force and EastEnders.

313
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,320
Ladies and gentlemen, Ross Kemp!

314
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:22,480
APPLAUSE

315
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:28,160
<font color="
Very well. Have a seat.

316
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:33,920
Could your granny do that?
Ha-ha-ha!

317
00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:40,120
My granny's 86.
She doesn't do doughnuts.
She makes nice apple pies.

318
00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:46,000
Have you tried one? Yes, but I'm
<font color="

319
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:51,120
You do your own stunt driving?
I don't do it all - I do a lot.

320
00:23:51,120 --> 00:23:57,720
Especially in EastEnders.
The guys I worked with know
I'm not telling porkies.

321
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:01,040
I did most of it. Who are they?
Over there.

322
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:04,120
<font color="

323
00:24:04,120 --> 00:24:05,720
Rob!

324
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:08,200
"He did". Thank you!

325
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:10,560
I said, stop the car!

326
00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:13,120
Phil!

327
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:31,680
Did you crash it into the river?
No, it was done on a catapult.

328
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:37,080
We drove it up to that point,
<font color="

329
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:41,280
Into the Thames.
They got you out first? They did.

330
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:44,880
What do you drive?
Actually, I can't guess.

331
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:48,560
I drive a 996 turbo.
Oh, a 911? Yep.

332
00:24:48,560 --> 00:24:51,800
<font color="
It is.

333
00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:57,040
I hate to say it, cos I've always
hated 911s. Why? The engine.

334
00:24:57,040 --> 00:25:01,880
In the wrong place. Where should
it be? At the back? No...

335
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:09,600
<font color="
back, but now it's in the middle,
where the Formula One engine is.

336
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:12,720
It's a rear-engine car, still.

337
00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:14,840
Am I right?

338
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,640
AUDIENCE: Yeah.

339
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,640
No.

340
00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:20,200
They're all car bores here.

341
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:25,200
<font color="
where I said,

342
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:30,440
"Would people at home nominate
someone you think is a car bore?"

343
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,960
We thought we'd get
six or seven replies.

344
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:39,280
Do you know how many said
they lived with one?

345
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:42,160
1,500. All women!

346
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:48,800
<font color="
reads a Haynes manual in bed
every night."

347
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:53,520
For a car he doesn't own!

348
00:25:56,480 --> 00:26:01,600
We played a game with Jay Kay
last week. He was scarily good.

349
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:06,400
We'll see if we can guess...
audience, join in.

350
00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:10,160
<font color="
Guess what it is.

351
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:14,680
That's a...

352
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:14,680
MAN SHOUTS

353
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:14,680
What?

354
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:19,920
Audi TT? Let's have a look.
It is, it's a TT. As you can tell.

355
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:22,080
Pathetic!

356
00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:24,560
APPLAUSE

357
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,360
We got blasted.
<font color="

358
00:26:31,360 --> 00:26:36,480
I know what that is.
Hazard a guess? Not a clue.

359
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:40,600
Only one firm puts its hinges
outside. Don't know.

360
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:43,520
Solihull, I reckon.

361
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:47,000
I'll have a stab at this.
Land Rover.

362
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:50,360
<font color="

363
00:26:50,360 --> 00:26:56,960
Feeling confident. You're right.
Ooh, I've got one! The first one
in two weeks.

364
00:26:56,960 --> 00:26:59,960
What's the next one?

365
00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:05,720
Calibrate...? Calibrate shape, but
<font color="

366
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:07,400
One.

367
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:10,280
Anyone? Come on, start. C'mon.

368
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,720
< Alfa Romeo?

369
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,720
Alfa Romeo what?

370
00:27:13,720 --> 00:27:18,520
↑ Period.
How do you know? You can't see!

371
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:21,320
<font color="

372
00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:25,240
If that's a Punto...
it could be a Seat.

373
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,800
No, it's not.
It's got to be a Punto.

374
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:33,040
Do you have a girlfriend?

375
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:33,040
LAUGHTER

376
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:39,400
Do you talk to her about this?
You walk down the street going,
<font color="

377
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:45,240
"It's a Hillman Hunter."
Let's have another.

378
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:48,440
Here we go. That's a Boxster,
isn't it?

379
00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:51,240
Is it a Boxster? Or a turbo.

380
00:27:51,240 --> 00:27:56,080
Let's have a look. Pull out.
<font color="

381
00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:59,800
Is it a... It's your car!

382
00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:04,720
It IS my car.
Just as well I got that one!

383
00:28:06,120 --> 00:28:11,000
Your 911, you don't just potter
about in it, either.

384
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:15,080
Tell us what you did
on holiday last year.

385
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:20,680
<font color="
to enjoy, that's why you save
for them.

386
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:24,720
I drove round the west coast
of France,

387
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:29,880
through Spain, up into Italy,
from Italy into Switzerland,

388
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:34,280
into Germany, from there
into France, then home.

389
00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:37,840
<font color="

390
00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,680
How long did it take?

391
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:43,640
Not long. Five days?

392
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:50,320
Five days? We hammered it.
About six days. We didn't sleep,
just drove.

393
00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:53,760
Even... Two driving.
It's not a holiday!

394
00:28:53,760 --> 00:29:01,200
<font color="
things on autobahns you can't here.
The car was designed for it.

395
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:05,600
Like? Going fast. How fast?
HE MUTTERS: 200?

396
00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:10,680
Up to 200. Over 200?
Up to 200. It goes up to 200.

397
00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:15,160
<font color="
to chat. Oh, no.

398
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:21,400
He's here,
as with all our guests, to play
Star In A Reasonably-Priced Car.

399
00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:25,840
The idea is... It's a good car.
Absolutely is.

400
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:32,200
<font color="
into a Suzuki Liana, £10,000
of throbbing muscle...

401
00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:37,400
Good car. We send you round
the track, see how fast you go,

402
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:42,800
and name the fastest celebrity -
we'll see it after it's edited.

403
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:48,240
For now, Ross Kemp!

404
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:48,240
<font color="

405
00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:54,160
On insider trading,
we've got some real bargains.

406
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:58,040
Fancy an Alfa Romeo? Yeah.
Gorgeous car.

407
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:01,560
166, the big one. Glamorous.
Great looking.

408
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:07,000
The problem is it may depreciate,

409
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:07,000
<font color="

410
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:12,640
But you can get one from
Alfa Romeo, new, for £349 a month.

411
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,320
That's not that much -
how does it work?

412
00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:21,160
Contract hire. £1,000 deposit,
then 35 months at £350 a month.

413
00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:27,320
Drive that car for three years,
<font color="
then hand it back.

414
00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:33,360
It's not a personal plan?
It's contract hire.
You've got to be VAT registered.

415
00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:36,160
What would you pay for other cars?

416
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:42,000
I phoned up some leasing companies.
For £350 a month, you could drive
<font color="

417
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:44,960
Nice. Diesel! Glamorous.

418
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:47,920
Or a 406 - diesel!

419
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:53,880
This is the one that was
a close-run thing for me -
and Skoda Octavia!

420
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:56,040
It's the Alfa.

421
00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:59,080
What about a Mercedes 5-series?

422
00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:05,560
<font color="
You're looking at about
£100 a month more.

423
00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:09,840
It's a big difference.
£452 I got on a Merc E class.

424
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:13,040
Italian car on the cheap. Nice one.
So cheap.

425
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:17,600
November's your month to do it.
<font color="

426
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,160
It went into liquidation. Yeah.

427
00:31:20,160 --> 00:31:26,800
The administrator's getting rid
of all the stock, and part
of that deal is the cars.

428
00:31:26,800 --> 00:31:32,440
All the company... 700 used Daewoos
are just hitting the marketplace.

429
00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:37,640
<font color="
Next week they'll be on forecourts.

430
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:43,560
Daewoo are cheap anyway -
will they be cheap-cheap?
Absolutely.

431
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:49,040
A Lanos is £10,500 new. It can be
picked up 18 months old for £4,000.

432
00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:54,960
Is 700 cars enough to affect
<font color="
be cheap?

433
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:59,000
Yes. There's worry because GM
have taken over.

434
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:01,760
They'll build a new network.

435
00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:06,760
Next year there will be 100 new
dealers so you'll get your service.

436
00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:11,040
But before that, if you want
<font color="

437
00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:13,520
£4,000. That IS a cheap car. Yeah.

438
00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:17,880
Finally, loads of people
run a second car.

439
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:21,880
They look for a car cheap to run,
a hatchback.

440
00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:27,560
They spend anything from £9,000
<font color="

441
00:32:27,560 --> 00:32:32,720
Or a base Focus. Easy to drive,
power steering, air conditioning.

442
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:36,400
Only problem -
it depreciates badly.

443
00:32:36,400 --> 00:32:40,480
In three years, two-thirds
of its value will be lost.

444
00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:44,840
Now here's an idea - you can buy
<font color="

445
00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:50,080
Good car. A 99 LS, something like
three years old, 40,000 miles,

446
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:53,360
you'd pick one up for £4,500.

447
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:58,000
It's bigger. If it's a few years
old, it's still fresh.

448
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:04,840
Buy from a dealer, get a warranty,
service history, air con,
<font color="

449
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:10,560
You'll lose £1,000 a year
depreciation. Run it, throw it away.

450
00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:14,440
We can have bigger cars for less?
Fantastic.

451
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:19,800
More advice on how to save money.
You'll make us millionaires! Thanks!

452
00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:24,520
<font color="
is the best-looking car ever.

453
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:28,400
Well, this is
the Lamborghini Miura,

454
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:33,080
the first mid-engine road car,
0-60 in 5.5 seconds.

455
00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:37,880
In 1966... Look at the slats there,
on the back window.

456
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:41,400
<font color="
at the back.

457
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:47,760
I love those rear wheel arches,
how they've pulled the metal
over the tyres.

458
00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:50,960
Some say this
is the best-looking car.

459
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:53,720
But it isn't. This is.

460
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:57,920
MUSIC: "Rule Britannia"
<font color="

461
00:33:57,920 --> 00:34:01,640
Aston Martin launched the DB7.

462
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:07,760

will be slaves.

463
00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:16,400
That's a lovely noise.
To be honest, I could pull
this car apart.

464
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:21,440
The early models were badly made,
and it wasn't one thing, either.

465
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,200
<font color="

466
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:28,280
The one I had had been built
like Mr Potato Head.

467
00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:30,760
It fell apart.

468
00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:34,480
And more - it's based
on the Jaguar XJS.

469
00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:37,720
Its underpinnings
are 25 years old now.

470
00:34:37,720 --> 00:34:40,760
In dog years, that makes it 438.

471
00:34:43,720 --> 00:34:51,640
<font color="
Where's the radar-guided cruise
control and the voice activation?

472
00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:55,040
Radio Two. CD track three.

473
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:57,480
Nothing.

474
00:34:57,480 --> 00:35:03,520
You get that stuff these days
on a Jag costing half the price.
Not in this.

475
00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:09,000
ENGINE REVS

476
00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:09,000
<font color="

477
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:11,840
But where's the get-up-and-go?

478
00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:16,880
Even with a six-litre V12, it's got
no more power than a parish council.

479
00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:21,120
I might also ask,
where's the headroom?

480
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:25,400
The computer
is underneath the driver's seat.

481
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:28,160
<font color="

482
00:35:28,160 --> 00:35:32,680
It's worse in the convertible.
The roof's about here.

483
00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:38,840
I could go on all day, listing
things that are wrong with this car.

484
00:35:38,840 --> 00:35:42,800
But if you had one,
and were going out,

485
00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:46,360
you could say,
<font color="

486
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:49,200
That sounds pretty good, doesn't it?

487
00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:51,840
Pretty good.

488
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:54,600
Shall we take the Aston?

489
00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:57,200
Aston.

490
00:35:59,680 --> 00:36:05,360
As you cruise round Mayfair,
past Purdy, Tiffany and Claridges,

491
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:08,240
you feel at home in a car like this.

492
00:36:08,240 --> 00:36:13,840
<font color="
that sends a shiver down the spine.

493
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:16,560
It's the looks.

494
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:34,800
And I don't think the DB7 is
good-looking just for a car, either.

495
00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:39,480
For me, the three best-looking
things made by man are,

496
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:44,120
at number three,
<font color="

497
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:49,160
at number two, the SR71 spy plane,
and at number one, this,

498
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:52,000
the Aston Martin DB7.

499
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:13,720
When Parkinson has a cricketer on,

500
00:37:13,720 --> 00:37:18,480
and you get that... AS PARKINSON:
My next guest in remarkable man,

501
00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:22,520
<font color="
I'd bear his children.

502
00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:25,200
NORMAL: That's how I feel right now.

503
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:30,080
I'm joined by the man
who designed the DB7, Ian Callum.

504
00:37:30,080 --> 00:37:33,120
You know Ivan the Terrible?

505
00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:37,760
When his people had built
the Basilica in St Petersburg,

506
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:43,320
<font color="

507
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:43,320
they'd never do anything better.

508
00:37:43,320 --> 00:37:48,640
Did anyone at Aston Martin say,
"Ian, we've got to have your eyes?

509
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:52,040
"You'll never top this."
Where are you now?

510
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:55,400
Jaguar. Yeah. Yes.

511
00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:58,440
<font color="

512
00:37:58,440 --> 00:38:01,440
That's another beauty. It's not bad.

513
00:38:01,440 --> 00:38:04,080
You know the scary thing?

514
00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:10,120
I've heard we'll never see
the like of this ever again,
because of legislation.

515
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:13,320
Legislation. From Brussels?

516
00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:18,120
<font color="
itself. It's self-policing. Is it?

517
00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:20,880
It's pedestrian legislation.

518
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:25,640
What wouldn't be allowed if you

519
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:25,640
did the DB7 in a few years' time?

520
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:31,320
You have to have a lot of air
between the bonnet and the engine.

521
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:35,960
<font color="
head... Can deform into the bonnet.

522
00:38:35,960 --> 00:38:38,720
How much air? About three inches.

523
00:38:38,720 --> 00:38:43,480
You have to... Yes. You can't
smooth it over. You have to lift it.

524
00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:46,520
<font color="

525
00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:51,080
We may be able to deploy
the bonnet. Deploy it? Yes.

526
00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:55,960
What do you mean? It lifts up.
When you hit someone? Yes.

527
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,920
<font color="

528
00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:03,000
I'm gonna run that person over.
Look at my bonnet!

529
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:07,720
Is that possible? It may be,
but it's not the immediate answer.

530
00:39:07,720 --> 00:39:11,440
There's also
other legislation coming in,

531
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:15,560
<font color="
looking after unbelted occupants.

532
00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:21,920
That's people who drive
who do not wear seatbelts.
We must look after them.

533
00:39:21,920 --> 00:39:26,560
American law? Absolutely.
If they don't... Many Americans...

534
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:30,800
AMERICAN ACCENT:

535
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:30,800
<font color="

536
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:36,560
Really? Absolutely. And you
have to protect them? Absolutely.

537
00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:39,400
How will this change the shape?

538
00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:42,840
We calculate
the trajectory of the head,

539
00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:47,600
<font color="
which comes in through here.

540
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:51,720
This point here has to go up
and forwards,

541
00:39:51,720 --> 00:39:54,480
which means the screen gets deeper.

542
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:59,240
You'll have to move that out. Yes.
That's Postman Pat's van!

543
00:39:59,240 --> 00:40:03,720
If you've got it to here
<font color="

544
00:40:03,720 --> 00:40:07,520
We do call it
the ice cream van, at work.

545
00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:12,200
I'll tell you
what I'd like to do now, OK?

546
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:19,000
Car designers can draw beautifully
when you give them paper.
Some of them can.

547
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,200
Don't!

548
00:40:21,200 --> 00:40:24,280
<font color="

549
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:28,000
Let's get Peter in.
This is your easel.

550
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:32,760
We have to think of something
to draw. Any suggestions?

551
00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:37,360
Impreza. Something
we want to see in the future.

552
00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:40,080
<font color="

553
00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:45,760
A modern-day E-Type. You're at
Jaguar. This shouldn't be difficult.

554
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:49,320
You're at Jaguar as well,
but higher up.

555
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:52,280
You can both get cracking, now.

556
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:55,200
I tell you what.

557
00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:58,040
<font color="

558
00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:02,120
How hard can it be
to be a car designer?

559
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:06,720
Peter, is this OK,
because having worked at Volvo,

560
00:41:06,720 --> 00:41:09,200
they had Etch-A-Sketches.

561
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:11,840
True. We don't use computers.

562
00:41:11,840 --> 00:41:16,760
I'm gonna start with the wheels.
<font color="

563
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:24,440
Are you doing it with current
legislation in mind,
or what you'd like to do?

564
00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:27,720
IAN: What we'd like to do. Good idea.

565
00:41:27,720 --> 00:41:33,640
How big should it be with wheels
that big? Why are you laughing?

566
00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:38,360
<font color="

567
00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:38,360
It's not a Hummer! It's an E-Type.

568
00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:43,400
I've finished. Fantastic.
Let's have a look at yours.

569
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:48,720
Where's the engine? In the front.
It's a front engine? Yes.

570
00:41:48,720 --> 00:41:55,440
It could be rear.
<font color="
None at all. Beautiful.

571
00:41:55,440 --> 00:41:59,360
Let's see what
the former Volvo man's done.

572
00:41:59,360 --> 00:42:02,800
Early days, but...
It's exactly the same!

573
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:05,600
LAUGHTER

574
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:05,600
How did you do that?

575
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:09,320
That's exactly the same!
<font color="

576
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:12,400
Can we get the two together?

577
00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:17,320
I'd definitely put your name on it.
He's nicked it.

578
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:20,440
Look at that. OK.

579
00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:23,200
They're exactly the same!

580
00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,800
PETER: That's why we designed Jags.

581
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:30,720
Know what I think? I suspect
<font color="

582
00:42:30,720 --> 00:42:34,760
and that you both know
what it looks like.

583
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:41,240
If you want to vote for what you
think is the best-looking car ever,

584
00:42:41,240 --> 00:42:46,280
do so by internet, sending us a
letter, or call on a cellular phone.

585
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:51,880
Thank you Ian Callum and Peter
<font color="

586
00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:54,720
Thank you.

587
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:01,840
Well,

588
00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:05,240
the tape has been edited.

589
00:43:05,240 --> 00:43:07,640
Put me out of my misery.

590
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:12,320
Shall we see the lap?
Oh, go on, please. Play the lap.

591
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:15,040
Oh! That's good.

592
00:43:16,720 --> 00:43:20,280
<font color="

593
00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:24,040
TYRES SCREECH

594
00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:24,040
That was rubbish.

595
00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:28,120
Floor, floor, floor,
floor, floor. Second.

596
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:30,160
Ooh! Ross!

597
00:43:32,120 --> 00:43:35,880
That was too steep.
It looks slower on TV!

598
00:43:35,880 --> 00:43:38,960
Second. You brake...

599
00:43:38,960 --> 00:43:41,760
<font color="

600
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:44,200
Full power, full power.

601
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:48,400
Brake. Oh, you're too early!

602
00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:53,880
Bring it in. You've got to put power
on. You lost all your power, son.

603
00:43:53,880 --> 00:43:56,760
Messed up the last bend.

604
00:43:56,760 --> 00:44:00,560
You messed up the last bend.
There you go.

605
00:44:00,560 --> 00:44:04,720
<font color="
Rain slows you down.

606
00:44:04,720 --> 00:44:12,360
What we thought we'd do...
After you did that, we sent Stig
the racing driver out.

607
00:44:12,360 --> 00:44:14,920
He did, on a dry track, 1.46.

608
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:20,840
We sent him out in the wet
and he did a 1.50.

609
00:44:20,840 --> 00:44:23,440
<font color="

610
00:44:23,440 --> 00:44:28,640
Would you like to know what
your wet time was? Camera in tight.

611
00:44:28,640 --> 00:44:35,240
Why did I do this?
Do you think it's slower than
Harry Enfield? I hate you!

612
00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:38,560
We take four seconds off
for a dry time.

613
00:44:38,560 --> 00:44:42,120
<font color="

614
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:47,680
Your wet time was one minute,
54 seconds.

615
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:51,000
I think a round of applause
for that.

616
00:44:56,840 --> 00:45:00,320
Well, I'm surprised.

617
00:44:56,840 --> 00:45:00,320
Because actually...

618
00:45:00,320 --> 00:45:04,800
I'll put you there.
<font color="

619
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:09,080
Actually, you and I are the same.
We like that.

620
00:45:09,080 --> 00:45:14,600
I like that. Well done. Ross Kemp.
Thank you. Thanks, mate.

621
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:21,400
Right. Grannies going doughnuts.
It's time.

622
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:26,160
They've seen what to do. All they
<font color="

623
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:29,640
First up, Joy had a bash.

624
00:45:29,640 --> 00:45:33,280
Joy is 73.
You don't mind me saying that.

625
00:45:33,280 --> 00:45:38,600
She's proud to say she once won
an essay-writing competition.

626
00:45:38,600 --> 00:45:41,680
Here's what happened.

627
00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:45,080
I can't reach the pedals.
Let's go forward.

628
00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:48,440
<font color="
Can you get full travel?

629
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:51,160
I never take my clutch off like that.

630
00:45:51,160 --> 00:45:56,680
I'm very careful with my clutch.

631
00:45:51,160 --> 00:45:56,680
ENGINE REVS

632
00:45:56,680 --> 00:46:00,080
Good luck to Joy.
She's quite nervous.

633
00:46:00,080 --> 00:46:03,120
TYRES SCREECH

634
00:46:03,120 --> 00:46:05,520
Yes!

635
00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:09,200
< Get it going.
<font color="

636
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:14,040
Dip the clutch. Build the revs.
Let the clutch out now.

637
00:46:14,040 --> 00:46:18,040
That's it.
Keep it there. Don't do anything.

638
00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:24,960
Keep going! Keep going! Good girl.

639
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:30,120
Go, go! Less throttle. Not quite
so much throttle. That's it!

640
00:46:31,120 --> 00:46:36,120
Ah! We...
<font color="

641
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:40,280
Joy, that was...
What a star! Fantastic!

642
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:43,120
Now the next three have a go.

643
00:46:43,120 --> 00:46:45,840
OK. This is Gwyneth.

644
00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:49,920
Build the revs up. Clutch out.

645
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:53,400
Power! More power. Good.
Keep it going.

646
00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:55,960
Keep it going.

647
00:46:55,960 --> 00:46:58,240
<font color="

648
00:46:58,240 --> 00:47:02,800
Whoa! In the rough!

649
00:46:58,240 --> 00:47:02,800
LAUGHTER

650
00:47:02,800 --> 00:47:05,760
And now it's Beryl.

651
00:47:05,760 --> 00:47:11,600
Get the revs up! Keep your foot on
the floor, that's good, keep it up!

652
00:47:11,600 --> 00:47:17,280
Keep going on the throttle! Harder
on the throttle! Keep it there!

653
00:47:17,280 --> 00:47:20,440
<font color="

654
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:25,680
And back now to Gwyneth. Keep going,
keep going, keep going, keep going!

655
00:47:25,680 --> 00:47:30,640
HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER

656
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:35,840
That's good. Let it out now, hard!
And finally, Ann.

657
00:47:35,840 --> 00:47:41,280
Keep it going, just the same.
<font color="

658
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:45,840
You're going round and round!

659
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:45,840
APPLAUSE

660
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:51,400
Can you hear the applause? Don't
stop, you're doing the best one!

661
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:55,680
OK, stop now. Go straight ahead.

662
00:47:55,680 --> 00:48:00,440
Oh, fantastic!
<font color="

663
00:48:00,440 --> 00:48:06,080
I can't tell you how exciting that

664
00:48:00,440 --> 00:48:06,080
was to be there - you were all stars.

665
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:12,040
But we've proven then that, you know,

666
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:12,040
older people can drive properly.

667
00:48:12,040 --> 00:48:16,960
But we want to know how far you can
<font color="

668
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:22,360
This is Sadie. Hello. Hello. How old
are you, Sadie? I'm not telling you.

669
00:48:22,360 --> 00:48:28,240
She's 80. No! Richard!
She IS 80. Watch this.

670
00:48:28,240 --> 00:48:31,800
ENGINE REVS

671
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:35,440
<font color="
round Piccadilly Circus!

672
00:48:35,440 --> 00:48:41,240
TYRES SCREECH

673
00:48:35,440 --> 00:48:41,240
Ooh, my word! Ooh, hello!

674
00:48:41,240 --> 00:48:44,520
Hang on in there, Sadie!

675
00:48:44,520 --> 00:48:48,800
Power, hard power, go on, power it!
Harder!

676
00:48:48,800 --> 00:48:52,880
More power, more power!
Keep it going!

677
00:48:52,880 --> 00:48:55,800
<font color="

678
00:48:55,800 --> 00:49:01,560
Good girl! Brilliant! Absolutely

679
00:48:55,800 --> 00:49:01,560
brilliant, fantastic! Keep it going!

680
00:49:01,560 --> 00:49:08,560
Back off a bit on the throttle!
Keep it going, keep it going!

681
00:49:08,560 --> 00:49:13,600
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

682
00:49:21,400 --> 00:49:28,400
What a star! Wha-wha-wha!
<font color="
stop until her tyres were gone!

683
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:35,520
Yours was better than Russ
the instructor! Without Russ,
what would we have done?

684
00:49:35,520 --> 00:49:38,280
They liked Russ. Oh yes!

685
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:43,680
You are all stars, old people can
<font color="

686
00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:48,600
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

687
00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:58,400
I've never seen anything like that!
It's amongst the most inspiring
sights I've ever seen.

688
00:49:58,400 --> 00:50:02,040
When Sadie's white head
disappears in smoke!

689
00:50:02,040 --> 00:50:09,760
Another challenge - if you're a man
<font color="
we can be multi-denominational.

690
00:50:09,760 --> 00:50:14,640
Yeah. Any religious denomination -
we can have mullahs,

691
00:50:14,640 --> 00:50:18,520
or rabbis...or priests... Yeah.

692
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:21,320
I'm struggling to remember..!

693
00:50:21,320 --> 00:50:28,160
If you're someone who goes
<font color="
dress, whatever,

694
00:50:28,160 --> 00:50:34,880
and think you can drive quicker
than someone from another religion,
get in touch.

695
00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:39,120
LAUGHTER

696
00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:39,120
No, that's a good idea.

697
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:44,920
I'd quite like to see Hector
the rector up against a mullah.

698
00:50:44,920 --> 00:50:47,760
<font color="

699
00:50:47,760 --> 00:50:53,040
So write to us at, er... What
address shall we have this week?

700
00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:03,160
I never know this - London W12

701
00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:06,320
7TS or F - put both.

702
00:51:06,320 --> 00:51:08,600
LAUGHTER

703
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:15,200
Or use your ecclesiastical internet
or a quill and a carrier pigeon.

704
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:18,120
<font color="

705
00:51:18,120 --> 00:51:23,800
we saw the Zonda go round
our test track at an amazing 1.23.

706
00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:28,320
We all thought we'd never
see quicker than that.

707
00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:33,360
But we said, "If you've got a car
that can beat that, get in touch."

708
00:51:33,360 --> 00:51:38,880
We had thousands of responses,
<font color="

709
00:51:38,880 --> 00:51:44,200
But we heard from one that - listen -
it caught my eye... It took out mine.

710
00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:46,680
A small company, Westfield.

711
00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:50,920
This is their car,
it is the Westfield XTR.

712
00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:57,800
This programme is about style -
<font color="
you've turned up with this.

713
00:51:57,800 --> 00:52:02,160
It's form following function,
it looks good.

714
00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:08,000
We said you can only take a car on
the track if it's road-legal. Look!

715
00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:16,560
So, that'll be it on the road, then.

716
00:52:16,560 --> 00:52:21,480
<font color="
it won't beat Zonda on the track.

717
00:52:21,480 --> 00:52:26,200
The Zonda has a 7.3-litre engine
and this has a... 1.3-litre engine.

718
00:52:26,200 --> 00:52:29,040
1.3? But it's very light.

719
00:52:29,040 --> 00:52:31,680
Have you driven one?

720
00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:38,160
I'm 42, you don't get in orange
<font color="

721
00:53:07,960 --> 00:53:10,720
The Westfield XTR.

722
00:53:10,720 --> 00:53:15,600
It only has a 1300CC engine -
it doesn't have a leather, chrome,

723
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:20,640
aluminium and carbon fibre interior.
It doesn't really have an interior.

724
00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:25,400
You don't get a pair of the Pope's
<font color="

725
00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:29,800
You don't actually get a windscreen,
in fact.

726
00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:34,720
And you can build one yourself
in your garage for under £20,000.

727
00:53:36,920 --> 00:53:39,840
But this only weighs 410kg.

728
00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:44,080
A Mini
weighs almost three times that.

729
00:53:44,080 --> 00:53:51,200
<font color="
a proper David and Goliath thing
going on here.

730
00:53:57,840 --> 00:54:02,600
Now that engine - yeah, it's
only a 1300, but it's a bike engine.

731
00:54:02,600 --> 00:54:07,280
A Suzuki Hayabusa to be precise,
meaning it develops 170bhp.

732
00:54:07,280 --> 00:54:09,920
In a car this light,

733
00:54:09,920 --> 00:54:16,040
<font color="
ratio of 460bhp per tonne. A lot.

734
00:54:16,040 --> 00:54:18,760
It's a heck of a lot! Ha-ha!

735
00:54:19,840 --> 00:54:24,440
The mighty Zonda
only manages 440bhp per tonne.

736
00:54:24,440 --> 00:54:30,440
So, maybe a budget DIY job could
embarrass a mega-money supercar.

737
00:54:32,440 --> 00:54:37,960
The best thing about a bike engine
<font color="

738
00:54:37,960 --> 00:54:42,160
And then MORE revs! It's incredible!

739
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:46,760
Every control is absolutely rigid!

740
00:54:46,760 --> 00:54:52,480
The steering is like reaching down
and turning the wheels with my hand!

741
00:54:52,480 --> 00:54:56,920
Because it's a bike engine,
we get a bike clutch -

742
00:54:56,920 --> 00:55:01,360
designed to be used
<font color="

743
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:04,960
So you have to be
very careful with it.

744
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:07,800
Once again, that grip just...

745
00:55:07,800 --> 00:55:12,720
Rrrr! This car is so much better
than I am! It's laughing at me.

746
00:55:12,720 --> 00:55:17,640
Ho, ho, ho! Do you know, I've just
sorted my Christmas present list!

747
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:25,320
<font color="
down the chimney. I'll leave the
garage door open. Drop it off."

748
00:55:25,320 --> 00:55:28,960
What a machine!
It's a proper Jack Russell.

749
00:55:28,960 --> 00:55:34,000
Will it go round our test track
faster than the mighty Zonda? No.

750
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:36,240
Right, we'll see.

751
00:55:36,920 --> 00:55:41,000
<font color="
there's the telemetry, look.

752
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:43,800
That is not a slow car, is it?

753
00:55:43,800 --> 00:55:49,760
A 1.3-litre car could not reach the
first corner as fast as the Zonda.

754
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:54,920
Look how he goes through that first
corner, that's an interesting line.

755
00:55:54,920 --> 00:55:58,200
Power to weight, you see, guys.

756
00:55:58,200 --> 00:56:03,920
<font color="
to the steady state corner -

757
00:56:03,920 --> 00:56:06,360
Chicago Corner, we call this.

758
00:56:06,360 --> 00:56:10,000
There's the map -
the little red dot.

759
00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:14,920
Look at those numbers! The Zonda
was doing 184,000 at this stage.

760
00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:20,000
But look at this thing corner.
<font color="

761
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:23,040
it'll unsettle nearly anything.

762
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:26,160
But not that, look, if you could...

763
00:56:26,160 --> 00:56:29,280
Want to know something terrifying?
Yes.

764
00:56:29,280 --> 00:56:33,720
That's two seconds faster
than the Zonda. Thank you!

765
00:56:40,160 --> 00:56:45,400
If you could see the Stig's face,

766
00:56:40,160 --> 00:56:45,400
<font color="

767
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:47,800
He's losing now.

768
00:56:47,800 --> 00:56:50,520
THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER

769
00:56:50,520 --> 00:56:55,240
You're talking rubbish,
you're nowhere tall enough to know.

770
00:56:55,240 --> 00:56:58,160
I'll mention power to weight again!

771
00:56:58,160 --> 00:57:01,120
Here comes the time, 1.21, 1.22.

772
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:03,480
1.22. Shh...

773
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:06,320
<font color="

774
00:57:06,320 --> 00:57:12,320
A £20,000 car you can build in your
shed, that's in your shed, guys!

775
00:57:12,320 --> 00:57:15,240
So I'm going to put that on here.

776
00:57:15,240 --> 00:57:18,080
XTR... X...T... What was it?

777
00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:23,200
It was 1.22.6 -
I'm going to round it up to 1.23.

778
00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:28,080
<font color="
That goes on the top.

779
00:57:28,080 --> 00:57:32,160
That is the quickest car,
the Westfield did it.

780
00:57:32,160 --> 00:57:36,920
On that bombshell, we... Ooh no!
Before you do that, Jeremy.

781
00:57:36,920 --> 00:57:41,440
Remember the designers, Jeremy
<font color="

782
00:57:41,440 --> 00:57:46,840
Bear in mind how many cars
this man's driven over the centuries.

783
00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:49,920
Let's have a look... Excellent!

784
00:57:49,920 --> 00:57:52,400
LAUGHTER

785
00:57:52,400 --> 00:57:58,520
It's good. My wheels went wrong.
Pathetic. We'll send it to Hyundai.

786
00:57:58,520 --> 00:58:03,560
<font color="
They'd bite your arm off. Probably.

787
00:58:03,560 --> 00:58:10,640
I won't tell you what's on next
week, we always change our mind,

788
00:58:03,560 --> 00:58:10,640
but there'll be some of this:

789
00:58:13,600 --> 00:58:20,640
That's the Aston Martin Vanquish

790
00:58:13,600 --> 00:58:20,640
versus the Ferrari 575 with the
<font color="

791
00:58:20,640 --> 00:58:22,720
Night!

792
00:58:43,600 --> 00:58:46,520
Subtitles by BBC Broadcast, 2002.

793
00:58:46,520 --> 00:58:51,480
E-mail us at subtitling@bbc.co.uk