1 00:00:25,640 --> 00:00:27,313 Just don't... talk too much 2 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:29,416 or try to pretend you know anything about the company. 3 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:31,750 OK. - And don't be funny or clever or... 4 00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:33,456 Just don't be the centre of attention. 5 00:00:33,480 --> 00:00:34,856 These people are very important to me 6 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:36,155 so just don't... - OK. 7 00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:37,714 ...don't be yourself. 8 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:40,190 I won't. 9 00:00:44,160 --> 00:00:45,276 Fuck's sake. 10 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:50,638 I know people in this building. 11 00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:52,680 Anyone could come... 12 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:54,640 Hi, Claire. 13 00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:55,760 Hello, Leslie. 14 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:05,794 Ooh, that's lovely. 15 00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:07,235 What is that? 16 00:01:09,640 --> 00:01:11,279 We have a load of vegetarians 17 00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,216 so make sure it's clear which ones have meat in them. 18 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,496 Loves a crisis. - We have a couple 19 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:15,576 of waitresses for the drinks 20 00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:17,056 so if you could hand round the food. - Mm-hmm. 21 00:01:17,080 --> 00:01:18,376 Put her in a quiet room with a nice breeze 22 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:20,176 she'll have a panic attack. - Where is everyone? 23 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:21,200 She's so happy. 24 00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:22,874 God, this is stressful. 25 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:25,560 Don't be weird about how big my office is. 26 00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:27,834 What the fuck? 27 00:01:28,080 --> 00:01:29,355 - I know. - Are you a... 28 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:31,756 It's over the top. I know. OK. 29 00:01:31,880 --> 00:01:33,553 Put them on the table. Not that table. 30 00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:36,275 Oh. You OK? - Of course. It's just 31 00:01:36,360 --> 00:01:37,510 it's just, it's a big night 32 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,760 and the Finnish partners are here, so it's all a bit... 33 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:42,551 - Oh, check the award. - Why? 34 00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:45,216 Just to make sure it's not pink or anything horrifically female. 35 00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:46,240 She'll loathe that. 36 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:48,078 Be careful with it. It's worth thousands. 37 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:49,760 It's not pink. - Good. 38 00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:51,480 It's perfect. It looks like a sperm. 39 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:53,000 Your hair looks nice. - Shut up. 40 00:01:53,720 --> 00:01:55,393 OK, don't sit on that. 41 00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:58,034 OK, put those on the posh plates. 42 00:01:58,240 --> 00:01:59,640 Put the award behind the microphone. 43 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:00,910 Oh, and, um... 44 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:07,880 Thank you. 45 00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:09,316 You've really, uh... 46 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,000 Thank you. 47 00:02:13,760 --> 00:02:15,513 Don't play with that. 48 00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:21,675 Oh, that's heavy. Argh! 49 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:28,355 Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 50 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:29,830 My God. 51 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:10,113 Where have you been? - Oh, sorry. 52 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:11,696 I just had to get the vegetarian bites. But it's all fine. 53 00:03:11,720 --> 00:03:13,916 You're gonna love them. - You're sweating so much. 54 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,559 Sorry. - It's attention-grabbing. 55 00:03:15,640 --> 00:03:17,757 It's only on one side. 56 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,515 Um, sorry, this is, uh, Sylvia. 57 00:03:20,920 --> 00:03:22,256 She's going to be presenting the award 58 00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,715 so when you hear me introduce her, get her onstage. 59 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:26,678 Hi. - Has this got shellfish in it? 60 00:03:26,880 --> 00:03:28,439 No. - Fine. 61 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,520 Four CEOs have been fired. Two are being taken to court. 62 00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:32,755 I mean, it's just sad. 63 00:03:32,920 --> 00:03:34,195 We felt like a family. 64 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,576 Yeah. Especially sad when you have to tell your family 65 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:38,592 not to touch each other up by the photocopier. 66 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:42,353 Stop making jokes. 67 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:43,880 I'm sorry. I can't help it. - You can. 68 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:46,711 Oh, Belinda's coming. Don't speak to Belinda. 69 00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,920 Hello, Claire. - Hello, Belinda. 70 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:51,839 God, you're tasteful. - Mm. 71 00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:53,310 Ooh, are these meaty? 72 00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:00,109 Say something. 73 00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:01,336 Um, no, I think they have courgette in them. 74 00:04:01,360 --> 00:04:02,874 Oh, I love courgette. 75 00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:06,279 You can treat them appallingly and they still grow. 76 00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:12,598 She seems lovely. - Yeah, she's great. 77 00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:14,760 So who are you so nervous about? 78 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:17,156 I'm not nervous. I'm being completely... 79 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:18,793 Claire! - Oh! 80 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:20,435 Hi. Oh! - Oh, wow. 81 00:04:20,520 --> 00:04:23,080 Oh, sorry. I-I'm-I'm so glad you could come. 82 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:24,879 - Of course. It's my job. - Ah. 83 00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:26,718 This is my catering. She's the sister. 84 00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:27,955 Hi. - Ah. 85 00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:30,396 I ate a sausage over there, thinking it was a prune. 86 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:31,440 Oh. 87 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:33,278 Fifteen years of vegetarianism, gone. 88 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:34,356 Like bang, bang. 89 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,470 Oh. 90 00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:36,896 We do actually call them "bangers." 91 00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:38,673 Ah! That's funny! 92 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:39,950 Yes, it was. 93 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:42,920 So, how do you two know each other? 94 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:44,873 Uh, we're partners. - Uh, we are partners. 95 00:04:45,240 --> 00:04:47,096 Um, business partners in, um... - Yes. She's been working with me 96 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,600 - in Finland, and, uh... - Yes. 97 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:49,720 We don't get to see each other 98 00:04:49,721 --> 00:04:51,120 that much, but I'm... - No, exactly. 99 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,480 I'm a huge... - I'm a big fan. 100 00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:54,552 Thank you. Admirer. 101 00:04:57,520 --> 00:04:59,716 I'm going to get a drink. Do you want anything? 102 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,678 Oh. Uh, champagne, please. 103 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,296 Oh, off the wagon? 104 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:04,515 Oh, just when I'm with you. 105 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,273 Let's go fucking crazy tonight, then. 106 00:05:08,480 --> 00:05:09,914 Hmm? 107 00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:11,720 What did you say? 108 00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:13,793 No, no. I, um, I was... 109 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:15,439 No, what did you say? - Oh, just, uh 110 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:16,760 uh... 111 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:18,872 I just said, "Let's go fuck like crazy tonight." 112 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:21,400 Oh, God. Uh... 113 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:23,996 OK! 114 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:33,800 Shut up. 115 00:05:33,840 --> 00:05:35,240 Oh, my God. 116 00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:38,119 He is a very good businessman. He's just socially sort of... 117 00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:39,714 And what's, um... - Shut up. 118 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:42,077 Claire. - Please don't. Please don't. 119 00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:43,039 I can't cope. OK? 120 00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:44,076 OK. 121 00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:46,120 What's his name? 122 00:05:48,360 --> 00:05:49,360 What's his name? 123 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:51,960 Klare. 124 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:55,320 What? 125 00:05:56,400 --> 00:05:57,675 His name is Klare. 126 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:00,314 Don't. - Mm. 127 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,552 Oh, God, I have to announce. OK, mingle. 128 00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:04,995 But don't talk to anyone. - OK. 129 00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:06,355 I'm not in love with him. 130 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:07,680 OK. 131 00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:15,553 Hi, everyone. 132 00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:18,155 I am very proud to announce the nominees 133 00:06:18,240 --> 00:06:20,152 for the Women in Business Awards 134 00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:22,160 sponsored by us here at Hurbots. 135 00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:24,393 Amongst our exceptional women 136 00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:26,751 we have Georgina Franks. 137 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,235 Belinda Friers. 138 00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:35,596 And another extraordinary woman 139 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:37,475 Klare Korhonen. 140 00:06:39,840 --> 00:06:42,309 Oh, uh, sorry. I-I think there's been a mistake here. 141 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:44,472 I... and, uh, Elizabeth Sawkin. 142 00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:51,030 Congratulations to you all. Have a wonderful evening. 143 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:53,271 We will be presenting the award very soon. 144 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:55,030 I'm gonna introduce Sylvia 145 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:56,176 who's gonna introduce Belinda. - Uh-huh. 146 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:58,056 When you hear me introducing Sylvia, get her onstage. 147 00:06:58,080 --> 00:06:59,799 It has to go like "cockwork." - Like what? 148 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:01,640 "Cockwork." 149 00:07:01,840 --> 00:07:03,056 Claire, your brain is somewhere else right now. 150 00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:04,639 Just... Sylvia. Go. 151 00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:06,950 Sylvia. 152 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:14,155 Crap. 153 00:07:14,640 --> 00:07:17,599 A huge thanks to Matthew, Mark Luke and John 154 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:18,955 for coming up with this award 155 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:22,431 and to Linkedln for connecting us all this evening and beyond. 156 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:26,118 I am so excited to introduce Sylvia Hamber 157 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:28,311 this year's winner of Women Who Work... 158 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:30,520 ...who will announce this year's 159 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:32,671 Best Woman in Business. Sylvia. 160 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:34,800 What an entrance! 161 00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:45,720 I'll do it. 162 00:07:47,480 --> 00:07:48,516 I can do it. 163 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:51,476 Um, I'm sorry. 164 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:53,671 It appears that Sylvia is busy 165 00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:56,434 which shouldn't come as a surprise, really. 166 00:07:57,280 --> 00:07:58,280 Uh... 167 00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:01,080 It's-it's been a big year for business. 168 00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:03,799 Particularly women in business. 169 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,874 Men have been pretty hands-on the past few decades. 170 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:12,639 I'd like to thank all the brilliant men and women 171 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:14,553 for supporting each other here at Hurbots. 172 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:16,472 We're a... a family, really. 173 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:18,696 And if we've learned anything during the past 12 months 174 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:20,951 it's that family really shouldn't touch each other up 175 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:22,040 next to the photocopier. 176 00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:27,076 Funny! 177 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:29,550 I am honoured to present this award 178 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:32,872 to this year's Best Woman in Business... 179 00:08:34,480 --> 00:08:35,675 Belinda Friers. 180 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:37,520 Fuck's sake! 181 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,832 Thank you, thank... thank you. 182 00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:05,320 Well, um... 183 00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:09,496 Well, I was going to say this is a bit on the nose 184 00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:11,751 but she doesn't seem to have one. 185 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:13,759 What were you thinking? - It'll be fine. 186 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,952 It's not fine. I awarded her with a pair of tits. 187 00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:19,120 Chase her down. 188 00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:21,955 Chase her down? - It's a stolen piece of art. 189 00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:23,416 I will deal with the photographer. 190 00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:24,760 - Claire! - Oh! 191 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:26,792 Oh, my God, you were brilliant. 192 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,036 Thank you, Klare. - I loved the joke. 193 00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:31,511 Ah. - Oh, well, I didn't think it was that funny. 194 00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:33,280 Can you go, my love? 195 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:34,993 Oh, I'm just gonna... - Take the stairs. 196 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:36,794 OK. 197 00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:57,994 I'm trained in martial arts. 198 00:09:58,160 --> 00:09:59,720 It's just the basics, but it is enough. 199 00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:01,240 I work at Harbots. 200 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:02,520 Hurbots. 201 00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:05,832 Yes, I ate a courgette off your tray. 202 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:07,550 Yeah. - It was delicious. 203 00:10:07,680 --> 00:10:09,239 Thank you. - What do you want? 204 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:11,600 That. 205 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:15,196 I-I need to take your award back. 206 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:17,832 Why? - It's a stolen piece of art. 207 00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:20,240 It's not really an award. It's all my fault. I can explain. 208 00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:21,750 Is it a long story? 209 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:23,720 Sort of. 210 00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:27,520 And she still doesn't know you have it? 211 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,910 That's glorious. 212 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:31,840 I think you did exactly the right thing. 213 00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:33,992 I think you're the only person who thinks that. 214 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,831 God. Women's awards. 215 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,000 Congratulations. 216 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:41,231 Oh, it's infantilising bollocks. 217 00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:43,993 Well, don't you think it's good that... 218 00:10:44,080 --> 00:10:45,912 No. No. It's ghettoising. 219 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:47,872 It's a subsection of success. 220 00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:51,470 Ah, it's the fucking children's table of awards. 221 00:10:51,560 --> 00:10:53,836 Why did you go? 222 00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:56,153 Because I'd be an arsehole not to. 223 00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:57,320 Ms Friers. 224 00:10:57,600 --> 00:10:58,600 Thank you, darling. 225 00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:01,240 Gosh, she's hot. 226 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:02,600 Yeah. 227 00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:04,320 Are you a lesbian? 228 00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:06,199 Not strictly. You? - Mm. 229 00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:09,160 Mm. Do you like old films? - Some. 230 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:11,153 And what's your favourite period film? 231 00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:13,840 Carrie. 232 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:17,995 God. 233 00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:20,513 God, you are a tonic. 234 00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:23,238 What do you do? Are you a "woman in business"? 235 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:24,760 I run a café. - Oh. 236 00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:26,400 Oh, good for you. 237 00:11:27,680 --> 00:11:28,955 Did you make the canapés? 238 00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,790 Uh, no, actually, I stole them. 239 00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:35,440 How old are you? 240 00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:37,233 Fifty-eight, and you? - Thirty-three. 241 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:39,875 Oh. Well, don't worry. It does get better. 242 00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,471 You promise? - I promise. 243 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,352 Listen, I was in an aeroplane the other day 244 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:49,075 and I realised... well, I-I mean 245 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:51,072 I've been longing to say this out loud, so... 246 00:11:52,560 --> 00:11:56,474 Women are born with pain built in. 247 00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:58,920 It's our physical destiny. 248 00:11:59,160 --> 00:12:03,120 Uh, period pains, sore boobs, childbirth, you know. 249 00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:07,672 We carry it within ourselves throughout our lives. 250 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:09,160 Men don't. 251 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:10,715 They have to seek it out. 252 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:12,911 They invent all these gods and demons and things 253 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,719 all so they can feel guilty about things 254 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:17,520 which is something we do very well on our own. 255 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:19,917 And then they create wars so they can 256 00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:21,999 feel things and touch each other 257 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:24,096 and when there aren't any wars, they can play rugby. 258 00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:27,830 And we have it all going on in here, inside. 259 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:31,750 We have pain on a cycle for years and years and years. 260 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:36,551 And then, just when you feel you are making peace with it all, what happens? 261 00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:38,480 The menopause comes. 262 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:41,638 The fucking menopause comes, and it is... 263 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:45,553 ...the most 264 00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:49,759 wonderful fucking thing in the world. 265 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:52,958 And yes, your entire pelvic floor crumbles 266 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,470 and you get fucking hot, and n-no one cares 267 00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:56,800 but then... 268 00:12:57,640 --> 00:12:58,640 you're free. 269 00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:01,400 No longer a slave 270 00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:04,319 no longer a-a machine with parts. 271 00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:07,958 You're just a person, in business. 272 00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:10,200 Oh. 273 00:13:11,560 --> 00:13:12,755 I was told it was horrendous. 274 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:14,673 It is horrendous, but then it's magnificent. 275 00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:16,840 Something to look forward to. 276 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:23,720 You better get back to that party. 277 00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,998 Your party. - Mm. It is not a party 278 00:13:27,520 --> 00:13:28,795 until someone flirts with you. 279 00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:31,600 And that's the only really shit thing about getting older 280 00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:34,036 is that people don't flirt with you anymore. 281 00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:36,352 Not really. Not with danger. 282 00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:39,035 I miss walking into a room and not knowing 283 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:42,392 and there's a sort of energy, a dare. 284 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:44,871 And do not take that for granted. 285 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:50,191 There is nothing more exciting than a room full of people. 286 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,400 Yeah, except most people are... 287 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:54,120 What? 288 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:57,240 Shit. 289 00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:58,520 Oh. 290 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:00,280 Look at me. 291 00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:02,350 Listen. 292 00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:05,234 People are all we've got. 293 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:10,237 People are all we've got, so grab the night by its nipples 294 00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:12,039 and go and flirt with someone. 295 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,155 Mm. No, that's not what I meant. 296 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:20,990 Mm... 297 00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:23,959 Oh. I wish you were my type. 298 00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:27,910 You take this tart back to my party 299 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,856 and go and find someone to actually do that with. 300 00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:31,439 I want to do it with you. - No. 301 00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:32,920 Why not? 302 00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:34,076 Honestly? - Yeah. 303 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:35,910 I can't be arsed, darling. 304 00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:40,510 I'm gonna go back to my room and have one more martini 305 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:41,880 and if you need anything 306 00:14:42,480 --> 00:14:43,439 call me. 307 00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:44,440 Anything. 308 00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:48,715 You can have whoever you want at your age. 309 00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:50,200 Except the Best Woman in Business. 310 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:53,313 Well, that's just cos she's... exhausted. 311 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:55,709 33 isn't exactly... 312 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:57,871 And what had Jesus done by 33? 313 00:14:58,240 --> 00:14:59,119 Died? 314 00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:01,271 Exactly. So get out there and flirt. 315 00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:12,760 Here you are. 316 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:15,031 Oh, hi. - Thought you might be snogging Finland. 317 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,639 Ha. No, I, uh... 318 00:15:16,720 --> 00:15:18,154 Just, uh, sorting a few things. 319 00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:19,840 I got her. - Oh. 320 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:23,039 And Belinda gave me her card. - Oh, that's great. 321 00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:25,675 What? - Nothing. 322 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:27,560 She's furious. 323 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,520 Really? - Yes. 324 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:30,790 It was a great night. 325 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,639 Everything went smoothly in the end 326 00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:34,677 and everyone loved the canapés. 327 00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:35,956 Really? I'm a dead woman. 328 00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:37,639 Really? - Yes. 329 00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:39,200 Really? 330 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:40,879 Yes. It was a great night. 331 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:42,880 She's gonna blow. I just have a feeling... 332 00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:44,758 I would have come up with my own joke 333 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,473 if you hadn't put that one in my head. 334 00:15:46,880 --> 00:15:48,712 I have my own jokes. 335 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:51,156 I am funny, I am interesting. 336 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:53,392 I knew I shouldn't have brought you here. 337 00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:55,136 What do you mean "interesting"? - You just think you can do 338 00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:57,391 whatever you like, say whatever you like 339 00:15:57,760 --> 00:15:59,831 steal whatever you like, kiss whoever you like. 340 00:15:59,920 --> 00:16:01,877 He kissed me! - Oh, I know! 341 00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:03,956 You know? 342 00:16:04,440 --> 00:16:06,336 Then why have we been spending the entire... - Because you're fine. 343 00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:09,000 You'll always be fine, you'll always be interesting 344 00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:11,800 with your quirky café and your dead best friend. 345 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:13,998 You just make me feel like I've failed. 346 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:18,359 Claire... 347 00:16:18,360 --> 00:16:21,239 If you mention the size of my office, I will scream. 348 00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,756 It's huge. 349 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:30,234 I just thought we were hanging out. 350 00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:32,836 Just as friends. 351 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:35,476 We're not friends. 352 00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,235 We are sisters. 353 00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:40,956 Get your own friends. 354 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:03,193 Oh, hi. - Oh, sorry. 355 00:17:03,720 --> 00:17:04,936 I didn't have your number, and you just said 356 00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:06,280 come round anytime with GandTs. 357 00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:08,399 Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. I just, uh... 358 00:17:09,040 --> 00:17:10,936 This is a bit embarrassing, but recently I've been 359 00:17:10,960 --> 00:17:13,475 really enjoying going to bed at 9:30. 360 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:15,200 Oh, shit. - No, it's fine. 361 00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:16,789 I can see GandT... Are you OK? 362 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,640 Yeah, yeah, I just-just fancied a drink and a priest 363 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:20,836 and a chat, maybe. 364 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:22,350 Oh, that's my whole job. 365 00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:24,136 We'll have to be quiet though 366 00:17:24,160 --> 00:17:25,160 because Pam's a bit of a 367 00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:27,471 sound tyrant in the evenings. 368 00:17:27,600 --> 00:17:28,600 Pam lives here? 369 00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:30,074 Yeah, Pam lives here. 370 00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:36,031 - So, I read your book. - OK, great. 371 00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:37,680 Well, it's got some great twists. - True. 372 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:39,439 Uh, but I just, I couldn't help 373 00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:40,576 but notice... - Come on, just spit it out. 374 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:42,637 ...just one or two little inconsistencies. 375 00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:43,880 OK, sure. 376 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,878 So, the world was made in seven days 377 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:48,073 and on the first day, light came 378 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:50,720 and then, a few days later, the sun came. 379 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:53,636 Yeah, that's ridiculous. 380 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:55,439 But you believe that. 381 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:58,593 But it's not fact. It's poetry, it's moral code. 382 00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:00,479 It's for interpretation to help us work out 383 00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:01,875 God's plan for us. 384 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:03,916 What's God's plan for you? 385 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:07,160 I believe God meant for me to love people 386 00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:09,433 in a... different way. 387 00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:11,910 I believe I'm supposed to love people as a father. 388 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:13,960 We can arrange that. 389 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:16,078 A father of many. 390 00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:18,080 I'll go up to three. - It's not gonna happen. 391 00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:19,634 Two, then. - OK, two. 392 00:18:24,120 --> 00:18:25,474 Oh, shit, Pam. She's not happy. 393 00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:27,074 We should go outside. 394 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:32,256 Do you think I should become a Catholic? 395 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:33,350 No, don't do that. 396 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:35,870 I like that you believe in a meaningless existence. 397 00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:38,237 And you're good for me, you make me 398 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:39,670 question my faith. 399 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,312 And? - I've never felt closer to God. 400 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:44,279 Fuck you. 401 00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:45,800 What was that? 402 00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:47,736 It wasn't a fox, was it? - I don't know. 403 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:49,877 Was it a fox? Shine something. Boo! Baa! 404 00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:52,000 - Oh, God, I bet it's a fox. - Oh, God. 405 00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:54,549 No, I'm not being funny, foxes have been after me for years. 406 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:56,240 It's like they have a pact or something. 407 00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,596 I'm not kidding. I was on a toilet 408 00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:00,672 a toilet of a train, and when the train stopped 409 00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:02,256 a fucking fox tried to get through the window. 410 00:19:02,280 --> 00:19:04,556 Of a train! Its face was in the window. 411 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:06,911 And once, when I was at a monastery 412 00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:08,536 I woke up just feeling a bit weird 413 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:10,870 like there might be a fox about, and a fox was sitting 414 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,429 underneath my window, looking at me like this. 415 00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:16,600 Pointing at me like, "You... we're watching you. 416 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:17,800 We're having you." 417 00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:21,830 Lucky God got there first. 418 00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:24,157 Well, yeah. - You could be a fox boy by now. 419 00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:26,280 And we all know what happened to them. 420 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:30,875 You OK? - I'm OK. 421 00:19:33,320 --> 00:19:34,356 Do you think I'm mad? 422 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,760 Because of the fox thing or cos of the God thing? 423 00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:38,713 You're obsessed. 424 00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:41,800 Do you ever have doubts? 425 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:45,554 Yes, of course. Every day. It's part of the deal. 426 00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:48,160 I just don't think I could do it. 427 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:50,480 Especially as a... 428 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:54,720 What? 429 00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:56,469 Celibacy and... 430 00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:57,560 Oh, it's a fucking fox! 431 00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:58,790 Chill out about the fox. 432 00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:01,759 Oh, sorry. I just don't know what they want from me. 433 00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:05,116 Sorry. 434 00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:07,280 Celibacy. 435 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:08,640 Go. 436 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:11,040 I just... 437 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:14,273 I couldn't give up sex forever. 438 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:16,836 It's just too... 439 00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:19,320 too... 440 00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:21,880 Celibacy... 441 00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:25,116 is a lot less complicated than... 442 00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:27,360 romantic relationships. 443 00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:29,714 What if you meet someone you like? 444 00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:34,033 I talk and drink and laugh and give them Bibles 445 00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:35,793 and hope they eventually leave me alone. 446 00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:38,480 What if you meet someone you love? 447 00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:43,350 We're not gonna have sex. 448 00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:51,720 I know that's what you think you want from me, but it's not. 449 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,031 It won't bring any good. 450 00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,193 - Well, it might. - It won't. 451 00:20:58,280 --> 00:20:59,760 I've been there many times... 452 00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:01,796 before I found this. 453 00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:02,990 Many, many times. 454 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:04,790 How many times? 455 00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:10,676 Many. 456 00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:23,598 I'd really like to be your friend, though. 457 00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:26,000 I'd like to be your friend, too. 458 00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:29,680 We'll last a week. 459 00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:32,600 What was that? 460 00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:35,876 What? 461 00:21:36,600 --> 00:21:38,159 Where'd you... where'd you just go? 462 00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:40,320 What? 463 00:21:41,120 --> 00:21:43,191 You just... went somewhere. 464 00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:46,120 There. There. 465 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:50,440 Where'd you just go? 466 00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:52,640 Nowhere. 467 00:21:58,240 --> 00:21:59,310 OK.