1 00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:11,594 When you said you were taking me to Spain, 2 00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:14,264 {\an8}I thought we'd eat tapas and stroll the Riviera. 3 00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:15,974 Not watch defenseless animals get killed. 4 00:00:15,974 --> 00:00:17,350 It's just a pit stop! 5 00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:19,394 Afterwards, we'll hit up the flamingo thing you wanted. 6 00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:21,229 Flamenco. It's art through dance. 7 00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:32,407 Now watch your dad work his magic. 8 00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:34,200 Hey, pal. 9 00:00:34,284 --> 00:00:37,454 You got three punctured organs and 30 seconds to live. 10 00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:39,039 Any unfulfilled desires 11 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,707 from your tragically short life? 12 00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:43,418 {\an8} I hated being a matador. 13 00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:46,171 {\an8}This stupid costume... all the blood 14 00:00:46,171 --> 00:00:49,716 {\an8}I longed to be a professional rollerblader. 15 00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:51,968 What if I could give you that dream after you die? 16 00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:54,721 That you could have the freedom to fishbrain and soul grind 17 00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,723 for eternity under my care? 18 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:59,017 All you have to do is sell me your soul. 19 00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:00,268 Uh, yeah, don't do it. 20 00:01:00,268 --> 00:01:01,686 Just spit here. 21 00:01:01,770 --> 00:01:02,645 Spit! 22 00:01:02,812 --> 00:01:04,272 Spit right there. Spit. 23 00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:08,193 Jesus Christ. 24 00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,652 Congrats, sweetie. 25 00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:11,571 You just witnessed your first soul collection. 26 00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:12,947 Yeah, congrats. 27 00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:14,699 You duped a guy into signing a contract 28 00:01:14,783 --> 00:01:17,368 he didn't even read to go where and do what exactly? 29 00:01:17,535 --> 00:01:19,454 I just fulfilled his ultimate desire. 30 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:20,830 Dude, I've heard street preachers 31 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,332 warn about eternal damnation. 32 00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:23,541 I've seen Little Nicky. 33 00:01:23,708 --> 00:01:25,710 Western culture's given you a misguided view 34 00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:27,170 of how I operate. 35 00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:29,547 I'm actually very above board, morally speaking. 36 00:01:29,714 --> 00:01:32,300 Then, like, show me his eternity under your care. 37 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:33,676 I mean, if you want me to consent 38 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,720 to join a siren seed someday, 39 00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:37,931 I gotta know what I'm consenting to, right? 40 00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:39,140 Exactly! 41 00:01:39,224 --> 00:01:41,017 It's about fucking time. 42 00:01:41,184 --> 00:01:42,519 Come on! Hot damn! 43 00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:47,899 You're gonna love this place so much, 44 00:01:47,899 --> 00:01:50,110 you're gonna want to kill yourself to join! 45 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:52,112 - Don't yet, okay? - Yet? 46 00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:05,166 Welcome to my Soul Hole. 47 00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:07,127 - Take a whiff. - What the fuck? 48 00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:09,337 The smell is my favorite part. 49 00:02:09,504 --> 00:02:12,048 Sit on me! I'm a chaise lounge. 50 00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,050 Sing Billy Joel to me. 51 00:02:14,217 --> 00:02:15,844 It's the only thing that makes me come. 52 00:02:15,844 --> 00:02:17,929 Morally above board, huh? 53 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:19,806 Well, the thing is, you see, souls are super valuable 54 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:21,766 because they power the universe. 55 00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:22,934 This is a tiny collection 56 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,185 compared to my Soul Imperium in hell. 57 00:02:24,352 --> 00:02:26,271 But I'm seeing steady growth! 58 00:02:26,437 --> 00:02:28,398 So you trick innocent people into signing up 59 00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:30,775 for this torture porn flophouse so you can have more power. 60 00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:31,734 Well, it's not torture. 61 00:02:31,901 --> 00:02:34,988 What you're seeing is absolute free will. 62 00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:38,575 Look at our friend over there, rollerblading around the room. 63 00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:40,118 {\an8}- Happier than a pig in shit. - What a marvelous life! 64 00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:41,786 {\an8} I guess. 65 00:02:45,707 --> 00:02:46,875 What the fuck? 66 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,835 - You call that free will? - Yeah! 67 00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:50,712 See, that guy wants to Rollerblade. 68 00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:52,547 Those guys want to eat Rollerbladers. 69 00:02:52,547 --> 00:02:54,215 Free will means no limits. 70 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:55,508 He'll regenerate eventually. 71 00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:56,551 So he can do it all over again? 72 00:02:56,551 --> 00:02:58,553 Yeah, that's the way it works here. 73 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:01,681 Man, this is some real messed up libertarian bullshit. 74 00:03:01,681 --> 00:03:03,266 Ah, you're being pretty reductive. 75 00:03:03,266 --> 00:03:05,810 Oh, fuck yes, they're here! 76 00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:07,645 Ooh, yeah, I think that's my cue to skedaddle. 77 00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:08,688 No, no, honey-- 78 00:03:08,688 --> 00:03:09,772 Snake with Arms said he'd introduce me 79 00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:10,982 to the Step Up franchise. 80 00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:12,567 And between a hot, sweaty Channing 81 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:13,985 and that burger gobbler-- 82 00:03:13,985 --> 00:03:15,403 The hole can be overwhelming. 83 00:03:15,570 --> 00:03:17,739 But seeing newbies arrive will change you forever. 84 00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:18,698 Fine. 85 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:20,200 But this is your last chance 86 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,784 before I stan my Chan. 87 00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:22,994 Goddamn, I love that Chan. 88 00:03:22,994 --> 00:03:24,162 Hey. 89 00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:25,371 Hey, Laura! What's up? 90 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:27,665 {\an8}Yeah, so I caught Irwin hoarding anger leeches 91 00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:29,417 {\an8}for his substitute teaching gig, 92 00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:32,086 {\an8}so I set off a bug bomb to prevent another infestation. 93 00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:33,880 {\an8}- Can I crash here for the night? - Oh. 94 00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:35,548 Uh, sorry, Laur. It's--it's not a good time. 95 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,175 Try the Thompsons. 96 00:03:37,342 --> 00:03:39,552 Their normcore lifestyle screams Murphy bed. 97 00:03:39,719 --> 00:03:40,803 {\an8}You're the only neighbor I haven't threatened 98 00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:43,640 {\an8}- physical violence to, so-- - Ugh, fine. Fine, come on in. 99 00:03:43,806 --> 00:03:45,266 {\an8}Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on! 100 00:03:45,433 --> 00:03:47,268 {\an8}Oh, well, you must be exhausted 101 00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:49,687 {\an8}from your bug massacre or whatever. 102 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,397 {\an8}- Let's get you to bed. - Bed? It's 8:35. 103 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:52,732 {\an8}Okay, here's a pillow. There's the bed. 104 00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,150 {\an8}- You know what to do. - Ah! 105 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,485 {\an8}- Hey, Darlene-- - Night, Laur! 106 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:57,487 {\an8}What the--are you kidding me? 107 00:03:57,612 --> 00:03:59,530 {\an8}Is this because I wouldn't go see Sade with you? 108 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:03,743 {\an8}Hello? 109 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:05,787 {\an8}Darlene? 110 00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:07,121 {\an8}Ugh. 111 00:04:07,205 --> 00:04:08,206 Okay. 112 00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:12,460 Holy shit, this place looks a lot smaller on the outside. 113 00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:13,795 {\an8}Ah! 114 00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:14,837 {\an8}There we go. 115 00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:16,339 {\an8}Mama needs her medicine. 116 00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:17,924 {\an8}What do we got here? 117 00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,551 {\an8}I want that brown stuff. 118 00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,136 {\an8}Couple of cubes of ice in that, please! 119 00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:23,429 Ah! 120 00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,974 Hey, I was saving that for a special occasion! 121 00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:27,558 Gus, are you okay? 122 00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:28,768 What did she do to you? 123 00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:30,311 - Gus? - I'm okay, Leeny. 124 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:31,980 {\an8}I just got the bejesus scared out of me, that's all. 125 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:33,189 {\an8}- Made a little piss. - Wait a minute. 126 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:34,565 {\an8}Darlene, you know this ghost? 127 00:04:34,732 --> 00:04:36,985 {\an8}Laur, this is my husband. 128 00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:39,779 {\an8}- Ex-husband. - Who are you? A wrestling coach? 129 00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,533 That was good. 130 00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:47,578 Why do all dads like boats? 131 00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:48,913 {\an8}Was there a meeting or something? 132 00:04:49,038 --> 00:04:50,707 Wait till you see how excited they get. 133 00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:54,419 It's like a baby eating chocolate for the first time. 134 00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:56,087 All right, here we go. 135 00:04:58,172 --> 00:05:00,800 Any minute now. 136 00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:04,053 Huh. Where are my fucking souls? 137 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:06,723 Uh, that might explain it. 138 00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:09,183 {\an8}"Dear Satan, Thanks for the souls. 139 00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:11,519 {\an8}"Biggleheim will pay big bucks for them. 140 00:05:11,519 --> 00:05:14,314 Eat shit. Marv, the Beast Guard." 141 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:15,857 That backstabbing son of a-- 142 00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,233 Who's Biggleheim? 143 00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:19,319 Biggleheim's not a person. It's a place. 144 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:20,987 The hub of the soul trade. 145 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,405 A funhouse trash heap 146 00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:24,741 where corporate con artists trick souls 147 00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,826 into eternal suffering by offering 148 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:29,746 roller coaster rides and branded swag. 149 00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:31,956 We gotta get my souls back before it's too late! 150 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,791 Those souls sound better off in Biggleheim 151 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,335 than your Soul Bowl. 152 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:36,419 Soul Hole! 153 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,254 And didn't you hear what I just said about Biggleheim? 154 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:40,214 Yeah! Branded swag, roller coasters. 155 00:05:40,298 --> 00:05:41,549 It sounds cool. 156 00:05:41,549 --> 00:05:43,760 Man, your selective hearing is on fire today. 157 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,928 - It's an evil place, Chrissy. - And this isn't? 158 00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,180 I think you've been sniffing your own farts 159 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:48,389 for way too long. 160 00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:50,266 You're gonna wish you were eating my farts 161 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,102 once I show you a place of torture and torment! 162 00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:55,563 We're going to Biggleheim! 163 00:05:55,563 --> 00:05:57,231 Relax your grip, baby. Good. 164 00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:59,692 I thought both your exes ran off with Russian catfishers. 165 00:05:59,776 --> 00:06:01,069 Oh, that was hubbies one and two. 166 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:02,403 Gus was number three. 167 00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:03,905 We were in the process of mending fences 168 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:05,114 when he died. 169 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,407 One moment, I'm getting my new 170 00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:07,825 Craigslist business up and running. 171 00:06:07,909 --> 00:06:10,286 The next, a weather satellite's crashing on my head. 172 00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:12,205 Luck of the Slovaks, I guess. 173 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,415 Darlene, how long has Gus been here like that? 174 00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:16,834 Uh, I noticed he was here when my broken bidet 175 00:06:16,918 --> 00:06:18,336 started working again. 176 00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:20,213 Gus always loved me with a clean caboose. 177 00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:22,173 That was a few months back. 178 00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:23,591 Mo--months? Oh, fuck. 179 00:06:23,591 --> 00:06:25,134 - What? - Ghost can only stay 180 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,552 on the corporeal plane for so long 181 00:06:26,636 --> 00:06:27,804 - before they turn into wraiths. - What? 182 00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:30,807 Vengeful spirits who hunt the living and feed off misery. 183 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,266 Oh, that's ridiculous. Gus couldn't hurt a fly. 184 00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:34,185 Show me where you keep your most precious memories 185 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:35,686 - from your relationship. - What? Why? 186 00:06:35,770 --> 00:06:37,188 Oh, man. 187 00:06:37,188 --> 00:06:38,356 Uh-oh. 188 00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:39,690 He doesn't look good. 189 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,984 Man, I'm feeling strange, Leeny. 190 00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:43,611 Like when I opened that hookah restaurant 191 00:06:43,611 --> 00:06:45,154 on top of that open gas line? 192 00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,240 - Oh! - Do it now! 193 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,574 Just give me a moment to mourn that hand! 194 00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:50,076 - Darlene. - It did things to me 195 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,202 you'd never believe. 196 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,495 - Ugh. - Boom, boom. 197 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:03,131 Welcome to the Biggleheim, 198 00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:04,590 where remarkable souls like you have the freedom 199 00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:07,427 to choose your own afterlife. 200 00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,721 Milady. 201 00:07:10,805 --> 00:07:13,599 No wonder you're so sensitive about your Soul Hole, Dad. 202 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:15,017 I mean, how could anyone compete with this? 203 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:16,727 - Stop! - What are you doing? 204 00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:19,147 We need disguises to sneak inside. 205 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:21,357 You want dibs on being the big pretzel? 206 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,901 No? Okay. 207 00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:25,319 Why are we sneaking? 208 00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:26,821 Eh, I'm a rebel of the industry. 209 00:07:26,821 --> 00:07:28,698 So much so, the Biggleheim schmucks 210 00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,366 banned me from re-entering 211 00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,535 and revoked my soul-collecting license. 212 00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,120 Pretty rock and roll, huh? 213 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,456 Yeah, the Phil Spector part of rock and roll. 214 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:38,624 Phil Spector! I love Phil Spector. 215 00:07:38,708 --> 00:07:40,168 I got the Christmas album. 216 00:07:40,168 --> 00:07:41,878 Welcome to Biggleheim, 217 00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:43,379 where your afterlife awaits you. 218 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:44,672 Funky like a chicken? 219 00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:45,965 You like to fuck chickens? 220 00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:48,301 Come to Polymelia afterlife and get a hug. 221 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,343 Two of them! 222 00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:52,722 Wow! Mutton chops? Who knew? 223 00:07:52,722 --> 00:07:55,183 So are all these booths run by real gods? 224 00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:57,101 There are no gods, Chrissy. 225 00:07:57,185 --> 00:07:59,145 Some douchebags invented that concept 226 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:02,148 to manipulate naive souls like yours to their cause. 227 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:04,400 These afterlives are run by eternal beings 228 00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:05,776 called primordials. 229 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,612 That's what I am. 230 00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:09,113 PRIMORDIAL 1: Slip and slide here. 231 00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,406 PRIMORDIAL 2: Mormon afterlife over here! 232 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,492 No birth control allowed. 233 00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:14,410 {\an8}Seems like these souls get to live plush, 234 00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:16,913 {\an8}peaceful afterlives, and yours get ripped to shreds. 235 00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:20,958 Make some noise for the Biggleheim Angels! 236 00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:22,585 - Whoa! - Oh, fucking kill me. 237 00:08:22,585 --> 00:08:23,628 B-B-B-B-Biggleheim! 238 00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:26,714 Y'all having a good time tonight? 239 00:08:26,714 --> 00:08:28,049 I can't hear you! 240 00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:29,967 I said, are you having a good time tonight or what? 241 00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:31,010 Yeow! 242 00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:32,178 ♪ Heaven is a place for each of you ♪ 243 00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,971 ♪ I promise you, this much is true ♪ 244 00:08:34,055 --> 00:08:35,473 ♪ So come and join our paradise ♪ 245 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:37,683 ♪ It's limitless and really nice ♪ 246 00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:38,809 ♪ Heaven ♪ 247 00:08:38,893 --> 00:08:40,478 ♪ The place to be somebody ♪ 248 00:08:40,478 --> 00:08:42,104 ♪ In death ♪ 249 00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:44,065 Now, this is an afterlife where souls would actually 250 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:45,691 want to spend eternity. 251 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:48,778 It's like they're BTS and you're some old guy 252 00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:51,489 who records BTS covers in their mom's basement. 253 00:08:51,489 --> 00:08:53,699 These are the assholes I was talking about! 254 00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:57,036 They're frat boys trying to make you drink their piss! 255 00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,538 Oh! 256 00:08:58,538 --> 00:08:59,914 There's that rat bastard Marv. 257 00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:01,374 Okay, Chrissy, let's g-- 258 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:05,044 where'd she--I should have brought the leash. 259 00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:07,129 I still don't understand why I gotta get rid of 260 00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,339 all these precious memories. 261 00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:10,424 Most of this stuff is dildos and gardening tools, Darlene. 262 00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:12,093 Yeah, that's my entire 40s! 263 00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,554 Unfinished business is the reason Gus can't go. 264 00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:17,223 He died while trying to mend your broken marriage. 265 00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:18,432 His unfinished business is you. 266 00:09:18,516 --> 00:09:19,600 That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard. 267 00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,519 No. We need to cut all ties 268 00:09:21,519 --> 00:09:22,979 between you two so he can cross over. 269 00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:25,022 Cross over? I just got settled. 270 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,858 Leeny-Beany-Tortellini and I are doing gangbusters. 271 00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:29,735 My online business in ladies' fashion 272 00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:31,404 is gonna get off the ground any day now. 273 00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,197 I can feel it in my garter belt. 274 00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:35,741 - Aha! Divorce papers. - Oh, God. 275 00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,868 This will help you remember how much you hated each other. 276 00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:38,995 If I didn't know any better, 277 00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:40,871 I'd say this was unnecessarily cruel. 278 00:09:40,955 --> 00:09:42,707 Darlene, you called Gus a serial adulterer... 279 00:09:42,707 --> 00:09:43,749 - Yeah? - Who cheated on you 280 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:44,792 - multiple times. - Yeah? 281 00:09:44,792 --> 00:09:46,043 Doesn't that sting? 282 00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:47,420 It wasn't multiple times, Laura. 283 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,505 It was one time with multiple people. 284 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,007 Actually, it was multiple times 285 00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:53,009 with multiple people, but one family. 286 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:54,176 Lot of sisters. 287 00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:55,386 Darlene convinced you that you were 288 00:09:55,386 --> 00:09:57,513 the star of a Truman Show-like experiment 289 00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:58,848 entitled, What's All the Gus About? 290 00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:00,057 I still stand by that title. 291 00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:02,727 But her abuse did reunite me with my biological father, 292 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:04,729 who then turned out to be a paid actor! 293 00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:06,439 - Argh! - Laura. 294 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:07,940 Let's not get our panties in a bunch. 295 00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:10,318 Speaking of, the duck pattern pair you got on 296 00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:12,028 - is a real nice choice. - What the? 297 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:13,863 Why, you Norman Bates peeping motherfucker! 298 00:10:13,863 --> 00:10:16,115 Stop fighting! Stop fighting right now, okay? 299 00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:17,617 There is no unfinished business. 300 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:18,659 Our love is strong. 301 00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:20,036 Stronger than death! 302 00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:22,496 Oh, God. Okay. 303 00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:25,916 Let's maybe put unfinished business back on the table. 304 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,835 Thumb Realm is like Palm Springs. 305 00:10:27,835 --> 00:10:30,171 Weather's always nice, and we have a heated pool! 306 00:10:31,839 --> 00:10:33,090 You're gonna love my afterlife, little girl. 307 00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:35,259 The email list, by the way, is really just 308 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,094 a community bulletin type thing. 309 00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:38,471 We really won't advertise-- 310 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:39,972 Beat it, you fat fucking toe! 311 00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,849 Hey, man. The lady can speak for herself. 312 00:10:41,849 --> 00:10:44,977 The lady is alive and 13. 313 00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:46,812 Hmm. Come find me when you die. 314 00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,190 Ah, man. This thumb guy's so cool! 315 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,317 He runs this, like, resort with a giant projector 316 00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,736 so his souls can watch movies on the lawn. 317 00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:55,112 You should take some tips! 318 00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:56,656 You won't make a verbal agreement with me, 319 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:58,783 now you're signing up for other afterlives? 320 00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:01,327 Who knows what dystopian shitstorm that asshole runs. 321 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:03,663 You trick souls into living in a pit of agony. 322 00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:04,789 Hanging with that thumb 323 00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:06,499 couldn't be worse than your Soul Hole. 324 00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,417 I know you're a kid who thinks the hereafter 325 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:09,877 should be sunshine and ice cream, 326 00:11:09,877 --> 00:11:13,214 and you judge me for being the genius who created hell. 327 00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:15,383 If you created hell, then why aren't you there? 328 00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:18,386 Why are you running a shithole ambulance chasing on Earth? 329 00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:20,930 Before you came along, I commanded fear and respect 330 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:23,557 from every goddamn belief system ever created! 331 00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:25,101 And now you're trying to convince yourself 332 00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:27,103 that you're still on top because you don't want to admit 333 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:30,147 you're an outdated fossil! 334 00:11:30,398 --> 00:11:32,358 I had this stupid idea that having a child 335 00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:33,651 would make me stronger. 336 00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:35,653 But you're just too fucking naive! 337 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:37,613 You're never gonna get this until you open your eyes 338 00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:39,240 and experience it. 339 00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:41,075 Big pretzel out. 340 00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:45,663 Goddamn, she takes after her mother. 341 00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:48,499 I'm telling you, I got two of them now. 342 00:11:48,499 --> 00:11:49,583 Go, quick, quick, quick, quick. 343 00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:50,876 Quick, quick, quick. 344 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,002 Quick, quick, quick, quick. 345 00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:54,797 {\an8}Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. 346 00:11:55,047 --> 00:11:56,257 My souls! 347 00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:57,925 All right, a little bit to the left. 348 00:11:58,050 --> 00:11:59,844 To the left. Okay, that's great. 349 00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:01,178 Now drop it slow-- 350 00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:02,555 Hey, Marv. 351 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,432 Any last word before I finger your eyes out 352 00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:05,850 and fuck your empty skull? 353 00:12:05,850 --> 00:12:07,143 Just a couple. 354 00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:08,436 We got him! 355 00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:09,937 Quick, quick, quick, quick. 356 00:12:10,187 --> 00:12:11,772 No need to struggle, Satan, 357 00:12:12,022 --> 00:12:15,359 'cause we ain't ever gonna let you go from our hearts. 358 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,445 Or our clutches. 359 00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:26,704 I'll never get this shit until I live it? 360 00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:28,622 Well, fuck you, Dad! 361 00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:30,332 Who's living now? 362 00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:34,920 Happy Hour, boat to Thumb Realm at 6:00. 363 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:36,756 Free drink ticket. 364 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:40,092 Huh, I guess I gotta open my eyes and experience it. 365 00:12:40,342 --> 00:12:42,762 Oh, no! There's so many afterlives recruiting me. 366 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:43,804 It's like, oh, this is so awkward! 367 00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:45,139 I mean, I was popular in high school, 368 00:12:45,389 --> 00:12:47,850 but who would have thought I'd be popular in the afterlife? 369 00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:56,609 Whoa! What the... 370 00:12:56,859 --> 00:12:57,943 hmm. 371 00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:12,082 I didn't recognize you in that whacked out man-suit. 372 00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:13,501 Didn't recognize you 373 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,211 without your boss's dick in your mouth. 374 00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:16,879 Back in the day, you would have never 375 00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:18,422 fallen for a trap like this. 376 00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,090 You're weaker than ever now. 377 00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:22,301 I can't believe your bitch ass sold me out to these jag-offs. 378 00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:23,844 They offered me my own realm. 379 00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:25,012 It's open concept. 380 00:13:25,012 --> 00:13:26,639 Everything's buffet style. 381 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:29,141 Spare me, shitbag! 382 00:13:31,602 --> 00:13:34,814 Shit's about to get biblical, bitches. 383 00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:37,107 Chrissy! So glad to see you dead. 384 00:13:37,191 --> 00:13:39,151 Oh, this place is so great and classy! 385 00:13:39,401 --> 00:13:41,320 Hey, everybody. This is Chrissy. 386 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:42,530 She's here for pool hour. 387 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:43,906 Why do they all look like thumbs? 388 00:13:44,156 --> 00:13:46,367 Here in Thumb Realm, we all take on 389 00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:47,868 the one true and pure form. 390 00:13:48,118 --> 00:13:51,163 All is balanced, fair, peaceful. 391 00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:55,125 That thumb get too much sun? 392 00:13:55,209 --> 00:13:56,293 Pool time is over! 393 00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:57,628 Game time! 394 00:13:57,628 --> 00:13:59,630 Why don't we show Chrissy Thumb Print? 395 00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:03,592 Chrissy, you're gonna love this. 396 00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:07,221 I present the Great Thumb! 397 00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:09,515 It measures our love for thumbness! 398 00:14:09,765 --> 00:14:12,226 Huh. Okay. 399 00:14:12,476 --> 00:14:14,562 Who wants to go first? 400 00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:16,689 How about you? 401 00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:18,732 Oh, uh. Yes, of course, Thumb. 402 00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:20,568 No problem. 403 00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:26,240 This is a Dybbuk Box. 404 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:27,408 It won't cure him, but it sure as shit 405 00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:28,951 will contain him forever. 406 00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,160 I don't know, Laura. 407 00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:31,245 I already put Gus in one wooden box. 408 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:32,705 I--I don't want to do it again. 409 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:34,999 - Break it off, Darlene! - I can't! 410 00:14:34,999 --> 00:14:37,209 Even the bad memories seem not so bad now. 411 00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:39,169 You're romanticizing a toxic relationship. 412 00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:41,547 Okay, and you and Satan didn't have good times? 413 00:14:41,797 --> 00:14:43,173 He's made my life a living hell! 414 00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:44,842 Without him, you wouldn't have Chrissy, right? 415 00:14:45,092 --> 00:14:46,719 Oh, whatever. I'm doing this. 416 00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:48,220 It's okay, baby. 417 00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:49,471 Don't be scared. 418 00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:03,110 Leeny! I love you! 419 00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:05,237 - Gus-Gus! - Ooh! 420 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:06,780 I'm still going in! 421 00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:07,907 I'm still going-- 422 00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:09,742 Darlene, no! 423 00:15:12,786 --> 00:15:13,746 Uh-oh. 424 00:15:18,542 --> 00:15:20,294 So, Alan, how does thumbness 425 00:15:20,294 --> 00:15:21,962 help you in your day-to-day life? 426 00:15:22,212 --> 00:15:25,049 Uh, we--well, when I think of how fleshy 427 00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:29,094 and--and stumpy I am, I never feel down! 428 00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:30,888 You use pleasant words, but the Great Thumb 429 00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:32,139 sees through your lies. 430 00:15:32,389 --> 00:15:33,599 What? No! 431 00:15:33,849 --> 00:15:36,560 Thumbness is a "dream thumb true." 432 00:15:36,644 --> 00:15:38,729 Ah, fuck it! 433 00:15:38,979 --> 00:15:39,897 I hate thumbs! 434 00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:42,024 I miss my fingers and my genitals! 435 00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:43,275 Oh, fuck! 436 00:15:43,525 --> 00:15:46,487 So fun. Who's next? 437 00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:48,739 - You're insane! - Hey, now. 438 00:15:48,989 --> 00:15:51,241 Check yourself, or you'll get thumbed. 439 00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:52,952 Shit, my dad was right. 440 00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:57,831 Stick yourself up an ass, you fucking thumb! 441 00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:03,295 Ah, shit! I'm stuck! This sucks! 442 00:16:03,545 --> 00:16:04,713 What sucks? 443 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,966 That you're on your back like an amputated turtle? 444 00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:09,593 Oh, bend, you useless fucking knuckles! 445 00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:13,180 Damn it! 446 00:16:13,430 --> 00:16:15,015 If I only had some hands! 447 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,561 Oh, thank you! Thank you so much! 448 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:22,398 With Thumb gone, we can make this place a real paradise! 449 00:16:22,398 --> 00:16:24,441 Uh, I-- I gotta go find my dad. 450 00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:25,693 He needs help with a thing, 451 00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,194 but have fun thinking for yourselves again! 452 00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:28,404 Oh, wait, wait, we're gonna have 453 00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:31,407 lots of good thinking times! Ha! 454 00:16:33,742 --> 00:16:35,327 Darlene? I should warn you, 455 00:16:35,411 --> 00:16:36,954 I get violent at hide and seek. 456 00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:39,415 Ask Chrissy. 457 00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:51,468 Oh, God. 458 00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:54,054 Okay. Um... 459 00:16:56,765 --> 00:16:57,850 Oh, fuck! 460 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,568 Leeny! 461 00:17:07,568 --> 00:17:08,819 Oh, God! 462 00:17:08,819 --> 00:17:11,405 I have a confession to make! 463 00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:14,033 I'm not his unfinished business! 464 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:16,285 - What? - We started a business together. 465 00:17:16,285 --> 00:17:18,328 We wanted to succeed as a team, even if it was 466 00:17:18,412 --> 00:17:20,289 just selling my used underwear online. 467 00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:21,582 Oh, God, Darlene! 468 00:17:21,832 --> 00:17:23,667 Not that it matters! Nothing sold. 469 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:26,086 We're gonna die 'cause nobody wants my dumpy dundees! 470 00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:27,129 Okay, so what you're saying 471 00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:28,922 is if someone buys your underwear... 472 00:17:29,006 --> 00:17:32,760 His actual business will be complete and he'll leave, yes. 473 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:34,094 But it has to be from a stranger! 474 00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:36,013 He'll know we're pitying him. 475 00:17:36,013 --> 00:17:37,723 Who do we know that would buy your dirty underwear? 476 00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:38,807 Wait. 477 00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,103 Hello? 478 00:17:43,187 --> 00:17:44,438 Buy what now? 479 00:17:46,523 --> 00:17:48,108 Hurry, hurry, hurry! 480 00:17:48,358 --> 00:17:49,735 God, you son of a bitch! 481 00:17:54,281 --> 00:17:55,949 Darlene? 482 00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:57,159 What--what happened? 483 00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:58,660 Good news: online perverts 484 00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:00,204 are sexually attracted to your wife. 485 00:18:00,454 --> 00:18:01,705 We got our first sale? 486 00:18:01,789 --> 00:18:03,248 Oh, Leeny-Beany! 487 00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:06,668 I told you, great collection, great hips, great-- 488 00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:07,961 ♪ Lady ♪ 489 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,296 Oh! 490 00:18:11,256 --> 00:18:12,549 Goodbye, Gus. 491 00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:13,717 Thanks for the memories. 492 00:18:13,967 --> 00:18:16,637 Goodbye, Darlene. 493 00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:18,680 Hey, real quick, are-- are you gonna send me 494 00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:20,849 my half of the money, or... 495 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:22,184 you know, you keep it. 496 00:18:22,184 --> 00:18:25,104 I'll hit you up for it on the flip-side! 497 00:18:27,606 --> 00:18:28,690 Hey, you okay? 498 00:18:28,774 --> 00:18:30,067 I think so. 499 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:32,361 It'll be nice getting back to the single life. 500 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,488 There's a speed dating event down by the adult bookstore 501 00:18:34,488 --> 00:18:35,823 - tomorrow if you want to-- - No, no. 502 00:18:35,823 --> 00:18:37,574 I'd rather go die in a bug bomb. 503 00:18:44,790 --> 00:18:47,668 Did I just get the craziest deja vu? 504 00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:49,711 Or is this exactly how you looked when we... 505 00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:51,171 ♪ Kicked your ass out of hell ♪ 506 00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,631 - Kicked out? - Fuck hell! 507 00:18:52,631 --> 00:18:54,633 I got a new thing going on. 508 00:18:54,633 --> 00:18:56,301 Word from Wibby Turkle is that girl of yours 509 00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,637 is a powerful little bastard. 510 00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:00,430 So that's what this is all about. 511 00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:01,974 We can't have you and your Lucifreak 512 00:19:01,974 --> 00:19:04,351 grabbing up all the power for yourselves, now, can we? 513 00:19:04,351 --> 00:19:06,270 Boss feels that wouldn't be fair. 514 00:19:06,270 --> 00:19:08,897 Where is that Beelzebaby, B-T-dubs? 515 00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:10,858 When you find it, you better bring a fucking army! 516 00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,985 I'm talking tanks! Nukes! 517 00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:15,362 Golems that shoot lasers out of their dicks! 518 00:19:15,362 --> 00:19:18,282 Because Chrissy don't take shit from nobody! 519 00:19:18,282 --> 00:19:20,242 She gets that from me. We're rebels. 520 00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:23,620 How sweet. But heart to heart... 521 00:19:23,704 --> 00:19:26,373 ♪ Time to cut out yours ♪ 522 00:19:29,251 --> 00:19:31,753 See? 523 00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:33,505 What did I tell you? 524 00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:35,799 Hey! Get that bitch! 525 00:19:35,883 --> 00:19:37,384 Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. 526 00:19:53,275 --> 00:19:55,485 Hey, girl, it's time to die! 527 00:19:57,196 --> 00:20:02,117 Get away from my daughter! 528 00:20:16,632 --> 00:20:18,175 {\an8} IT'S SATAN! HE'S HERE! 529 00:20:18,175 --> 00:20:19,426 {\an8}HE DOESN'T SEEM HAPPY!!! 530 00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:30,437 Fuck this. We outie. 531 00:20:30,437 --> 00:20:32,189 ♪ This ain't over, Satan ♪ 532 00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:35,525 ♪ Not by a long shot ♪ 533 00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:46,078 Could a fossil go nuclear like that? 534 00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:47,371 Fuck no. 535 00:20:47,371 --> 00:20:48,580 Hey, thanks for the save. 536 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:50,249 Yeah, back at you. 537 00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:51,291 You were right. 538 00:20:51,375 --> 00:20:52,751 This place blows chunks. 539 00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:54,127 So, you've come around, huh? 540 00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:55,921 Finally see the wisdom of the Soul Hole? 541 00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:57,005 Oh, yeah, no, no, no. 542 00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,048 The Soul Hole's still a shit place 543 00:20:58,048 --> 00:20:59,675 fucked up beyond all imagination. 544 00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:01,093 It's just not the worst place out there. 545 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,344 That's fair enough. 546 00:21:02,344 --> 00:21:04,805 Come on, kiddo. Let's get out of here. 547 00:21:10,894 --> 00:21:13,772 Hey, Dad, what the angel said about you 548 00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:16,608 getting kicked out of hell, was that true? 549 00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:19,778 Is that why everyone now thinks you're a loser? 550 00:21:19,778 --> 00:21:23,156 Um, yeah, I guess. 551 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:24,616 Pretty rock and roll. 552 00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:29,204 Speaking of, you want to go mess with Phil Spector's soul? 553 00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:30,247 I know where it is. 554 00:21:30,247 --> 00:21:31,331 Yeah, I'd like that. 555 00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,880 So how was your weekend? 556 00:21:38,964 --> 00:21:41,049 It was actually pretty good. 557 00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:42,092 Yeah? 558 00:21:42,092 --> 00:21:43,510 What'd you do, wipe out a fairy forest? 559 00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:46,138 Dad's not as two-dimensional as you think. 560 00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:49,099 Uh, okay. 561 00:21:49,099 --> 00:21:51,351 What'd that fucker say about me this time? 562 00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:53,729 Nothing. 563 00:21:55,605 --> 00:21:57,190 Well, that's right. 564 00:21:57,274 --> 00:21:58,775 He better not. 565 00:22:00,736 --> 00:22:04,406 Because if he did, I would say something to him that-- 566 00:22:04,406 --> 00:22:06,116 say something back, so... 567 00:22:06,116 --> 00:22:08,160 And he knows it. 568 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,370 He knows he can't say shit. 569 00:22:10,454 --> 00:22:12,205 Got nothing to say to me. 570 00:22:13,915 --> 00:22:16,501 If he was like, "You're ugly," 571 00:22:16,585 --> 00:22:19,546 I'd be like... 572 00:22:19,546 --> 00:22:21,548 "You are." 573 00:22:22,549 --> 00:22:25,469 Uh, whoa, is that a bird's nest? 574 00:22:25,469 --> 00:22:27,471 I didn't know they're--no. 575 00:22:28,555 --> 00:22:30,599 That's just a pile of sticks. 576 00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:35,562 Captioned by 3Play Media