1 00:00:30,990 --> 00:00:33,073 [♪ The Faders: No Sleep Tonight] 2 00:00:33,156 --> 00:00:37,198 ♪ I got you I got you on my mind ♪ 3 00:00:37,281 --> 00:00:41,365 ♪ And it's time to make you see What I want ♪ 4 00:00:41,448 --> 00:00:47,073 ♪ So I'll just make this a little more obvious ♪ 5 00:00:47,156 --> 00:00:51,865 ♪ 'Cause I get what I want and I want you to get with me ♪ 6 00:00:51,949 --> 00:00:54,907 ♪ Don't think you know ♪ 7 00:00:54,990 --> 00:01:00,240 ♪ How far I'm going to go ♪ 8 00:01:00,323 --> 00:01:04,031 ♪ You can't stop this feeling ♪ 9 00:01:04,115 --> 00:01:06,407 ♪ You can't run away ♪ 10 00:01:06,490 --> 00:01:09,740 ♪ Baby, I'm what's on your mind ♪ 11 00:01:09,824 --> 00:01:12,990 ♪ You can't stop this feeling ♪ 12 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:15,573 ♪ There's no escape ♪ 13 00:01:15,657 --> 00:01:17,281 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 14 00:01:17,365 --> 00:01:20,615 ♪ You won't get no sleep tonight ♪ 15 00:01:20,699 --> 00:01:22,240 ♪ You want me ♪ 16 00:01:22,323 --> 00:01:24,615 ♪ You want me all the time ♪ 17 00:01:24,699 --> 00:01:28,949 ♪ And you don't need nothing else ♪ 18 00:01:29,031 --> 00:01:34,031 ♪ But you seem to be a little oblivious ♪ 19 00:01:34,115 --> 00:01:35,615 ♪ So I'll show you the way ♪ 20 00:01:35,699 --> 00:01:39,031 ♪ If you think that you need some help ♪ 21 00:01:39,115 --> 00:01:42,365 ♪ Tell me, baby ♪ 22 00:01:42,448 --> 00:01:47,573 ♪ Are you coming, with me? ♪ 23 00:01:47,657 --> 00:01:51,240 ♪ You can't stop this feeling ♪ 24 00:01:51,323 --> 00:01:53,573 ♪ You cannot run away ♪ 25 00:01:53,657 --> 00:01:56,824 ♪ Baby, I'm what's on your mind ♪ 26 00:01:56,907 --> 00:02:00,782 ♪ You can't stop this feeling ♪ 27 00:02:00,865 --> 00:02:02,907 ♪ There's no escape ♪ 28 00:02:02,990 --> 00:02:04,615 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 29 00:02:04,699 --> 00:02:07,907 ♪ You won't get no sleep tonight ♪ 30 00:02:07,990 --> 00:02:10,073 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 31 00:02:10,156 --> 00:02:12,490 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 32 00:02:12,573 --> 00:02:14,657 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 33 00:02:14,740 --> 00:02:17,156 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 34 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:19,573 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 35 00:02:19,657 --> 00:02:21,824 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 36 00:02:21,907 --> 00:02:24,156 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 37 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,407 ♪ No sleep tonight ♪ 38 00:02:26,490 --> 00:02:29,615 ♪ Won't sleep tonight ♪ 39 00:02:29,699 --> 00:02:31,949 [cheering] 40 00:02:32,031 --> 00:02:33,782 Ahh! 41 00:02:33,865 --> 00:02:37,156 Oh! She shoots, she scores! Goal! 42 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,990 - What? That's right! Give it! - Nice kick. 43 00:02:39,073 --> 00:02:40,824 - Very nice kick. - Give me the ball! 44 00:02:40,907 --> 00:02:42,990 - Ow! Justin! - [laughing] 45 00:02:43,073 --> 00:02:46,323 - Drop... Put me down! - OK. Down like... 46 00:02:46,407 --> 00:02:48,323 - [screams] - Oh, sorry. 47 00:02:48,407 --> 00:02:50,907 - Ooh, goodness. - Hey! 48 00:02:53,448 --> 00:02:54,865 Mmm. 49 00:02:54,949 --> 00:02:56,782 OK, you are really getting good. 50 00:02:56,865 --> 00:02:58,365 Aw, you too. 51 00:02:58,448 --> 00:03:00,156 I mean, when we first started going out, 52 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:01,824 you couldn't kiss at all. 53 00:03:01,907 --> 00:03:05,156 - I meant at soccer. - Aww. Really? 54 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,615 Absolutely. You're... 55 00:03:07,699 --> 00:03:10,448 ...probably already better than half the guys on my team. 56 00:03:10,532 --> 00:03:14,073 Mm, probably more than half. [laughs] 57 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:18,782 What do you mean, I couldn't kiss at all? 58 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:22,573 Don't worry. I've taught you well. 59 00:03:24,156 --> 00:03:25,198 [whistle blows] 60 00:03:25,281 --> 00:03:27,990 [girl 1 laughing] I know. 61 00:03:28,073 --> 00:03:31,031 [girl 2] Oww! OK, but seriously, don't you think 62 00:03:31,115 --> 00:03:33,657 you'd get more playing time at a school like Michigan? 63 00:03:33,740 --> 00:03:35,532 Yeah, maybe, but it's always been 64 00:03:35,615 --> 00:03:37,156 about being a Tar Heel for me. 65 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:38,865 I'm gonna wear that Carolina blue. 66 00:03:38,949 --> 00:03:41,699 - Yeah. - Yeah, baby! 67 00:03:41,782 --> 00:03:44,365 OK, what is the lacrosse team doing on our field? 68 00:03:44,448 --> 00:03:46,532 - The school cut our team. - Wait, what? 69 00:03:46,615 --> 00:03:49,240 - Not enough girls signed up. - So they just cut us? 70 00:03:49,323 --> 00:03:51,615 They can't do that. 71 00:03:53,990 --> 00:03:56,532 - OK. This is not over. - [whistle blows] 72 00:03:56,615 --> 00:03:58,782 [boys yelling] 73 00:04:00,990 --> 00:04:03,699 Hi, girls. I heard the bad news. 74 00:04:03,782 --> 00:04:06,073 "Bad"? It's a disaster. 75 00:04:06,156 --> 00:04:08,949 - Now college scouts, they won't even get to see us play. - Yeah. 76 00:04:09,031 --> 00:04:12,740 I know. If there's anything I can do, just say the word. 77 00:04:12,824 --> 00:04:14,240 As a matter of fact, there is. 78 00:04:14,323 --> 00:04:15,907 We wanna try out for the boys team. 79 00:04:15,990 --> 00:04:17,949 [laughs] 80 00:04:18,031 --> 00:04:19,782 Uh, anything besides that. 81 00:04:19,865 --> 00:04:22,240 Coach, come on! You know that we're good enough. 82 00:04:22,323 --> 00:04:26,073 I don't know that that's a thing that I know. 83 00:04:26,156 --> 00:04:27,281 [girl] What? 84 00:04:27,365 --> 00:04:29,073 All we're asking for is one shot. 85 00:04:29,156 --> 00:04:30,865 - Yeah. - Girls, 86 00:04:30,949 --> 00:04:33,532 we have two weeks before school starts. 87 00:04:33,615 --> 00:04:38,365 Then we open against Illyria. A rivalry game. We have to win. 88 00:04:38,448 --> 00:04:40,031 And we can help you win. 89 00:04:40,115 --> 00:04:41,782 [Justin] Hey, baby. 90 00:04:41,865 --> 00:04:42,824 Hey. 91 00:04:42,907 --> 00:04:44,281 What's going on, coach? 92 00:04:44,365 --> 00:04:48,782 Umm, the girls here want to try out for the team. 93 00:04:48,865 --> 00:04:50,281 [boys laughing] 94 00:04:50,365 --> 00:04:52,990 - You're not serious. - All right, all right! 95 00:04:53,073 --> 00:04:55,281 You're all excellent players. 96 00:04:55,365 --> 00:04:58,323 - But girls aren't as fast as boys. - [boys] Right. 97 00:04:58,407 --> 00:05:02,073 - What? - Or as strong. Or as athletic. 98 00:05:02,156 --> 00:05:05,407 This is not me talking. It's a scientific fact. 99 00:05:05,490 --> 00:05:09,281 Girls can't beat boys. It's as simple as that. 100 00:05:09,365 --> 00:05:11,323 OK. Well, Justin, you're the team captain. 101 00:05:11,407 --> 00:05:13,657 What do you think about it? 102 00:05:13,740 --> 00:05:16,448 I think the coach said it all. 103 00:05:16,532 --> 00:05:20,115 Yesterday you told me that I was better than half the guys on your team. 104 00:05:20,198 --> 00:05:23,073 [boys] What? 105 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,615 I never said that. 106 00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:27,532 What are you talking about? Why are you lying?! 107 00:05:27,615 --> 00:05:30,156 Viola! End of discussion. 108 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:31,824 [boy] Yeah, tell her, man. 109 00:05:31,907 --> 00:05:34,532 Fine. End of relationship. 110 00:05:34,615 --> 00:05:36,782 [boys] Ohhh! 111 00:05:36,865 --> 00:05:40,281 - Come on, let's go. - Baby, don't be like that. I... 112 00:05:40,365 --> 00:05:41,949 I just don't want to see you get hurt. 113 00:05:42,031 --> 00:05:44,699 Aww. You are so full of... 114 00:05:44,782 --> 00:05:46,657 [whistles] Back to practice. 115 00:05:46,740 --> 00:05:48,323 [♪ Matt White: Wasteland] 116 00:05:48,407 --> 00:05:49,990 [sighs] 117 00:05:50,073 --> 00:05:51,782 ♪ All alone ♪ 118 00:05:51,865 --> 00:05:53,156 [girl] Sebastian. 119 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:56,031 ♪ Where are you? ♪ 120 00:05:56,115 --> 00:05:59,198 ♪ Are we over? ♪ 121 00:05:59,281 --> 00:06:02,031 Sebastian?! 122 00:06:02,115 --> 00:06:03,699 ♪ Something said... ♪ 123 00:06:03,782 --> 00:06:04,990 Sebastian! Jeez! 124 00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:07,073 Oww! 125 00:06:08,323 --> 00:06:09,824 Ew. It's you. 126 00:06:09,907 --> 00:06:12,240 [sighs] God, you and your brother look scary alike 127 00:06:12,323 --> 00:06:13,573 from the back. 128 00:06:13,657 --> 00:06:15,407 I think it's your total lack of curves. 129 00:06:15,490 --> 00:06:18,865 Hah. Hi, Monique. It's so good to see you too. 130 00:06:18,949 --> 00:06:21,240 Mm. I'm looking for Sebastian. Where is he? 131 00:06:21,323 --> 00:06:23,323 I don't know. 132 00:06:23,407 --> 00:06:25,699 Just remind your brother how lucky he is to be in my life. 133 00:06:25,782 --> 00:06:29,198 And tell him to give me a call if he wants to stay in it. OK? 134 00:06:29,281 --> 00:06:33,031 OK. Does he have your number? 1-800-BEYOTCH? 135 00:06:33,115 --> 00:06:36,657 [makes whining noise] 136 00:06:36,740 --> 00:06:40,824 She will do great things. 137 00:06:40,907 --> 00:06:45,990 [gasps] I have a surprise for you! 138 00:06:46,073 --> 00:06:48,865 And this is why I don't bring friends over. 139 00:06:48,949 --> 00:06:50,573 Mom, not now. I had a really bad day, so... 140 00:06:50,657 --> 00:06:52,740 This is just the thing to just perk you up. 141 00:06:52,824 --> 00:06:54,198 - Hold on. - OK. 142 00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:55,573 - Keep your eyes closed. - OK. 143 00:06:55,657 --> 00:06:57,573 Eyes closed, eyes closed, closed, closed. 144 00:06:57,657 --> 00:06:59,407 They're closed. 145 00:06:59,490 --> 00:07:01,031 All right. Surprise! 146 00:07:03,615 --> 00:07:07,407 Beautiful gowns for my darling debutante. 147 00:07:07,490 --> 00:07:09,699 Mom, have I not told you a thousand times? 148 00:07:09,782 --> 00:07:11,782 I have no interest in being a debutante. 149 00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:13,782 It's totally archaic. 150 00:07:13,865 --> 00:07:15,573 How could I wind up with a daughter 151 00:07:15,657 --> 00:07:19,115 who only wants to kick a muddy ball around a field all day? 152 00:07:19,198 --> 00:07:22,782 Well, the world has been set right, Mom. They cut my team. 153 00:07:22,865 --> 00:07:26,198 - What? No soccer? - Yeah, that's right. No soccer. 154 00:07:26,281 --> 00:07:27,407 How sad. 155 00:07:27,490 --> 00:07:29,115 Yeah, I can see you're all torn up. 156 00:07:29,198 --> 00:07:32,740 Well, Justin's gonna love you in this. 157 00:07:32,824 --> 00:07:35,448 Yet another reason not to wear it. I dumped him. 158 00:07:35,532 --> 00:07:37,907 What? Why? 159 00:07:37,990 --> 00:07:39,115 I don't wanna talk about it. 160 00:07:39,198 --> 00:07:42,115 He's so handsome and rugged 161 00:07:42,198 --> 00:07:45,156 and chiseled and great. 162 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:47,865 Then why don't you date him, Mom? 163 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:52,573 [laughing] No, I couldn't 164 00:07:52,657 --> 00:07:54,073 - Hey, Sebastian. - Hey. 165 00:07:54,156 --> 00:07:55,615 - You OK? - Uh-huh. 166 00:07:55,699 --> 00:07:58,657 - Monique was looking for you. - Mmm. 167 00:07:58,740 --> 00:08:00,615 Why do you even date her, anyway? 168 00:08:00,699 --> 00:08:02,448 She's hot. 169 00:08:02,532 --> 00:08:03,490 It's a guy thing. 170 00:08:03,573 --> 00:08:05,949 Yuck. But she's so awful. 171 00:08:06,031 --> 00:08:07,949 [laughing] Mmph! 172 00:08:08,031 --> 00:08:10,782 Hey, you know, you could use the front door. 173 00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:13,156 And Mom can't see me. 174 00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:15,657 She thinks I'm staying at Dad's. Dad thinks I'm staying at Mom's. 175 00:08:15,740 --> 00:08:18,490 In two days they both think that I'm going away to school. 176 00:08:18,573 --> 00:08:20,323 That is the beauty of divorce. 177 00:08:20,407 --> 00:08:21,782 Wait, where are you going? 178 00:08:21,865 --> 00:08:23,490 London for a couple of weeks. 179 00:08:23,573 --> 00:08:25,365 As in London, England? 180 00:08:25,448 --> 00:08:28,031 Yeah, my band got a slot in a music festival there. 181 00:08:28,115 --> 00:08:30,824 OK, what are you gonna do about school? 182 00:08:30,907 --> 00:08:34,490 Yeah, I was kind of hoping you could help me with that. 183 00:08:34,573 --> 00:08:36,990 Could you just, like, pretend to be Mom, 184 00:08:37,073 --> 00:08:38,824 call Illyria, tell them I'm sick? 185 00:08:38,907 --> 00:08:41,365 Something that sounds like it would last for two weeks, 186 00:08:41,448 --> 00:08:42,657 like mad cow. 187 00:08:42,740 --> 00:08:45,156 Sebastian, you just got kicked out 188 00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,615 of Cornwall for skipping. This is not exactly the way 189 00:08:47,699 --> 00:08:49,031 you want to start out. 190 00:08:49,115 --> 00:08:50,699 Hey, I want to be a musician. 191 00:08:50,782 --> 00:08:53,573 Last time I heard, they don't need to know trigonometry. 192 00:08:53,657 --> 00:08:56,073 Besides, if you want to chase your dreams, 193 00:08:56,156 --> 00:08:58,699 sometimes you gotta break the rules, right? 194 00:08:58,782 --> 00:09:01,824 You know the percentage of bands that make it to the big time? 195 00:09:01,907 --> 00:09:04,365 Probably the same as female soccer players. 196 00:09:04,448 --> 00:09:07,156 I will see you in two weeks. 197 00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:09,240 - Sebastian. - Ow! 198 00:09:09,323 --> 00:09:10,699 Sebastian! 199 00:09:10,782 --> 00:09:12,156 Were you talking with your brother? 200 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:14,699 No. Yes. 201 00:09:14,782 --> 00:09:18,156 On the phone. He's at Dad's. Bye, Dad. 202 00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:19,365 Picture this: 203 00:09:19,448 --> 00:09:21,323 We're at the country club, 204 00:09:21,407 --> 00:09:24,990 they call your name, and you emerge in this. 205 00:09:25,073 --> 00:09:27,824 Ta-da! 206 00:09:27,907 --> 00:09:29,865 Echh. No. 207 00:09:29,949 --> 00:09:33,573 Sorry, Mom. I have a strict no-ruffles policy. 208 00:09:33,657 --> 00:09:39,448 Sometimes I just think you just might as well be your brother. 209 00:09:39,532 --> 00:09:44,115 Hmm. You know what? 210 00:09:44,198 --> 00:09:45,740 If you can't join them, 211 00:09:45,824 --> 00:09:47,907 beat them. 212 00:09:47,990 --> 00:09:49,407 [laughing] 213 00:09:49,490 --> 00:09:52,365 You want me to turn you into your brother? 214 00:09:52,448 --> 00:09:55,031 That's right. I'm going to Illyria as Sebastian. 215 00:09:55,115 --> 00:09:56,573 I'll make the boys soccer team, 216 00:09:56,657 --> 00:09:58,907 and in 12 days, I'll beat the Cornwall boys team. 217 00:09:58,990 --> 00:10:02,198 - That's right! - You've taken way too many soccer balls to the head. 218 00:10:02,281 --> 00:10:04,198 You know I can do it, Paul. 219 00:10:04,281 --> 00:10:05,907 Except for the voice and the mannerisms 220 00:10:05,990 --> 00:10:08,240 and the breasts and the mentality and.... 221 00:10:08,323 --> 00:10:09,573 Besides, it doesn't matter. 222 00:10:09,657 --> 00:10:11,448 Nobody at Illyria has even met Sebastian. 223 00:10:11,532 --> 00:10:13,240 They wouldn't know the difference. 224 00:10:13,323 --> 00:10:14,573 They'll know he's a girl. 225 00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:16,240 Oh, come on, Paul. 226 00:10:16,323 --> 00:10:17,740 [both] Yeah, come on, Paul. 227 00:10:17,824 --> 00:10:19,699 Yeah, come on, Paul. 228 00:10:22,198 --> 00:10:25,615 OK. OK. I'll see what I can do. 229 00:10:25,699 --> 00:10:27,657 Yes! 230 00:10:27,740 --> 00:10:29,782 [♪ Joan Jett and the Blackhearts: Love Is All Around] 231 00:10:29,865 --> 00:10:35,281 ♪ Who can turn the world on with her smile? ♪ 232 00:10:35,365 --> 00:10:37,448 ♪ Who can take a nothing day ♪ 233 00:10:37,532 --> 00:10:39,949 ♪ And suddenly make it all seem worthwhile? ♪ 234 00:10:40,031 --> 00:10:42,782 ♪ Well, it's you, girl and you should know it ♪ 235 00:10:42,865 --> 00:10:45,448 ♪ With each glance and every little movement you show it ♪ 236 00:10:45,532 --> 00:10:48,824 ♪ Love is all around No need to fake it ♪ 237 00:10:48,907 --> 00:10:51,240 ♪ You can have the town Why don't you take it? ♪ 238 00:10:51,323 --> 00:10:56,573 ♪ You're gonna make it after all ♪ 239 00:10:56,657 --> 00:10:59,907 ♪ How will you make it on your own? ♪ 240 00:11:02,031 --> 00:11:04,198 ♪ This world is awfully big ♪ 241 00:11:04,281 --> 00:11:06,198 ♪ And, girl, this time you're all alone ♪ 242 00:11:06,281 --> 00:11:09,615 ♪ But it's time you started living ♪ 243 00:11:09,699 --> 00:11:11,865 ♪ It's time you let someone else do some giving ♪ 244 00:11:11,949 --> 00:11:14,657 ♪ Love is all around No need to fake it ♪ 245 00:11:14,740 --> 00:11:17,490 ♪ You can have the town Why don't you take it? ♪ 246 00:11:17,573 --> 00:11:21,782 ♪ You're gonna make it after all ♪ 247 00:11:21,865 --> 00:11:23,782 ♪ Oww! ♪ 248 00:11:23,865 --> 00:11:25,699 Uh, where are you going? 249 00:11:25,782 --> 00:11:28,824 Mom, I told you! I'm going to Dad's house for two weeks. 250 00:11:28,907 --> 00:11:30,990 No, you didn't. And you're not going. 251 00:11:31,073 --> 00:11:33,365 We've hardly spent any time together this summer. 252 00:11:33,448 --> 00:11:35,198 Now, you just go upstairs and unpack. 253 00:11:35,281 --> 00:11:37,490 OK, Mom, I thought about what you said. 254 00:11:37,573 --> 00:11:41,407 And you know Monique is gonna be there 24/7 with Sebastian, 255 00:11:41,490 --> 00:11:43,907 so, I don't know, I was just thinking 256 00:11:43,990 --> 00:11:45,699 that maybe she'd show me the ropes 257 00:11:45,782 --> 00:11:47,532 on the whole debutante thing. 258 00:11:47,615 --> 00:11:50,990 - This is so exciting! - Isn't it?! 259 00:11:51,073 --> 00:11:52,490 You're gonna have so much fun. 260 00:11:52,573 --> 00:11:54,740 Now, there's the formal ball. And the luncheon. 261 00:11:54,824 --> 00:11:57,365 And, oh, did I mention the fundraiser next week? 262 00:11:57,448 --> 00:11:59,573 It's gonna be a carnival! 263 00:11:59,657 --> 00:12:01,240 Look out! 264 00:12:01,323 --> 00:12:02,907 Your brother promised to be there, 265 00:12:02,990 --> 00:12:05,031 so remind him when you see him, all right? 266 00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:09,031 Oh, my little girl. You're finally gonna be a lady! 267 00:12:09,115 --> 00:12:11,615 [both giggling] 268 00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:15,949 [rock music] 269 00:12:33,115 --> 00:12:35,240 , - [record scratches] - Are you sure I can do this?! 270 00:12:35,323 --> 00:12:37,448 [Paul] Oh, yeah. Absolutely. 271 00:12:41,490 --> 00:12:44,031 [boy] What's up? 272 00:12:44,115 --> 00:12:45,573 Oh, my God, he knew! 273 00:12:45,657 --> 00:12:48,407 - I wanna go home! - Relax. He was being friendly! 274 00:12:48,490 --> 00:12:51,573 We're not going home! Stop it! I did not spend all this time... 275 00:12:51,657 --> 00:12:54,115 - It's your fault! Drive home! - My idea?! You asked me! 276 00:12:54,198 --> 00:12:56,198 - I did your hair and makeup! - Reverse! 277 00:12:56,281 --> 00:12:58,782 - I want to go! - That was not easy! You're being a girl! 278 00:12:58,865 --> 00:13:00,907 - We're not going. Go. - Come on! Drive! 279 00:13:00,990 --> 00:13:02,448 - He was being friendly. - All right! 280 00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:05,490 Now, let's run through it one more time. 281 00:13:05,573 --> 00:13:06,782 Let me hear the voice. 282 00:13:06,865 --> 00:13:07,949 [clears throat] 283 00:13:08,031 --> 00:13:11,573 Hey. What's up? I'm Sebastian. 284 00:13:11,657 --> 00:13:13,699 OK. Now show me the strut. 285 00:13:18,073 --> 00:13:19,323 Now, hawk a loogie. 286 00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:21,782 [rasping, spitting] 287 00:13:21,865 --> 00:13:24,240 - I'm so proud! - [laughing] 288 00:13:24,323 --> 00:13:26,573 - Get off me! - Remember, 289 00:13:26,657 --> 00:13:28,949 inside every girl there's a boy. 290 00:13:29,031 --> 00:13:31,573 That came out wrong. But you know what I mean. 291 00:13:32,740 --> 00:13:34,990 Vi. 292 00:13:37,198 --> 00:13:38,240 [♪ Junior Senior: Good Girl, Bad Boy] 293 00:13:38,323 --> 00:13:39,490 Be a good boy. 294 00:13:39,573 --> 00:13:40,949 ♪ I've got to, got to, got to ♪ 295 00:13:41,031 --> 00:13:42,615 ♪ Catch my breath ♪ 296 00:13:42,699 --> 00:13:43,949 ♪ I've got to, got to, got to ♪ 297 00:13:44,031 --> 00:13:45,782 ♪ Catch my breath ♪ 298 00:13:45,865 --> 00:13:47,615 ♪ I've got to, got to catch my breath ♪ 299 00:13:47,699 --> 00:13:49,657 ♪ We're getting closer and closer ♪ 300 00:13:49,740 --> 00:13:51,323 ♪ And warmer and warmer ♪ 301 00:13:51,407 --> 00:13:53,115 ♪ My heart is racing and pacing ♪ 302 00:13:53,198 --> 00:13:54,824 ♪ Your dad's gonna kill me ♪ 303 00:13:54,907 --> 00:13:57,323 ♪ Good girl ♪ 304 00:13:57,407 --> 00:13:59,990 ♪ With such a bad boy ♪ 305 00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:03,156 ♪ You used to be a good girl ♪ 306 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:06,907 [marching band music] 307 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:17,824 Whoo! 308 00:14:17,907 --> 00:14:20,365 See you guys. 309 00:14:20,448 --> 00:14:23,281 I can do this. I am a dude! 310 00:14:23,365 --> 00:14:27,073 I am a hunky dude! I'm a badass hunky dude! 311 00:14:27,156 --> 00:14:29,365 ♪ Good girl ♪ 312 00:14:29,448 --> 00:14:34,031 ♪ Your mom says I'm a bad boy ♪ 313 00:14:34,115 --> 00:14:36,323 [cello music] 314 00:14:39,615 --> 00:14:42,323 ♪ Got to catch my ♪ 315 00:14:42,407 --> 00:14:45,740 ♪ Got to catch my ♪ 316 00:14:45,824 --> 00:14:47,657 [glass breaking] 317 00:14:50,281 --> 00:14:54,490 ♪ Yeah, you used to be a good girl ♪ 318 00:14:54,573 --> 00:14:56,240 ♪ But then you met a bad boy ♪ 319 00:14:56,323 --> 00:14:59,448 ♪ Yeah, that's me all right ♪ 320 00:15:06,657 --> 00:15:11,740 [high voice] Hey! [deep voice] Hey! What up? 321 00:15:11,824 --> 00:15:13,073 [keys jangling] 322 00:15:13,156 --> 00:15:14,782 You must be my roommates. 323 00:15:14,865 --> 00:15:16,407 [snickers] 324 00:15:16,490 --> 00:15:18,907 [clears throat] 325 00:15:18,990 --> 00:15:20,407 Wha... what's your name? 326 00:15:20,490 --> 00:15:22,407 Sebastian Hastings. 327 00:15:22,490 --> 00:15:24,073 Duke Orsino. 328 00:15:24,156 --> 00:15:25,615 [grunts] 329 00:15:25,699 --> 00:15:27,031 [Duke] Umm, OK. 330 00:15:27,115 --> 00:15:29,532 OK, OK, OK. Umm... 331 00:15:29,615 --> 00:15:31,865 This is Andrew and Toby. They live next door. 332 00:15:31,949 --> 00:15:34,907 Yeah. Freshman dorm's that-a-way, twiglet. 333 00:15:34,990 --> 00:15:36,407 Seriously, how old are you? 334 00:15:36,490 --> 00:15:39,073 I skipped a couple grades. [laughs] 335 00:15:39,156 --> 00:15:42,699 I'm brilliant. Shh. [laughs] 336 00:15:48,115 --> 00:15:51,490 Anyway, do you know when soccer tryouts start? 337 00:15:51,573 --> 00:15:53,115 [laughs] Noon. You play? 338 00:15:53,198 --> 00:15:57,448 Absolutely. Center forward. You know it, bro. 339 00:15:57,532 --> 00:16:00,156 So you play the beautiful game... bro? 340 00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:02,573 Brothers? Brethren? 341 00:16:02,657 --> 00:16:06,115 Yeah, I'm a striker. Andrew and Toby are halfbacks. 342 00:16:06,198 --> 00:16:07,824 Schveet. 343 00:16:09,699 --> 00:16:11,865 OK, why do you have tampons in your boot? 344 00:16:16,740 --> 00:16:18,407 Um... 345 00:16:19,740 --> 00:16:21,490 I get really bad nose bleeds. 346 00:16:21,573 --> 00:16:23,865 So you stick them up your nose? 347 00:16:25,532 --> 00:16:26,824 Yeah. 348 00:16:26,907 --> 00:16:31,073 What? You've never done that? 349 00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:33,782 Oh, my... Beckham does it all the time. 350 00:16:33,865 --> 00:16:35,532 - Seriously? - Yes. 351 00:16:35,615 --> 00:16:37,824 - Look. I'll just show you how to do it. - Ahh! 352 00:16:37,907 --> 00:16:40,699 Take that off and.... 353 00:16:40,782 --> 00:16:43,532 ...whatever that is. 354 00:16:43,615 --> 00:16:46,156 And you stick it right in. 355 00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:47,490 It absorbs right up. 356 00:16:47,573 --> 00:16:49,865 [all laughing] 357 00:16:49,949 --> 00:16:51,657 Are you kidding me? 358 00:16:51,740 --> 00:16:52,990 That's disgusting. 359 00:16:53,073 --> 00:16:54,990 Oh, my God, your roommate's a freak. 360 00:16:55,073 --> 00:16:56,657 That's so disgusting. 361 00:16:56,740 --> 00:17:00,699 Let's start the season how we finished the last. 362 00:17:00,782 --> 00:17:03,365 Sharp! 363 00:17:05,448 --> 00:17:08,407 What are you, the runt of the family? 364 00:17:17,156 --> 00:17:19,407 OK, shirts and skins. 365 00:17:19,490 --> 00:17:23,198 [clears throat] Pardon me, sir. I have to be a shirt. 366 00:17:23,281 --> 00:17:26,281 - What? - I'm allergic to the sun. 367 00:17:27,657 --> 00:17:29,365 You're allergic to the sun? 368 00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:33,407 Very, very, very deathly, deathly allergic. 369 00:17:33,490 --> 00:17:36,240 We like to accommodate here at Illyria. 370 00:17:36,323 --> 00:17:39,740 So I'll follow you around with a parasol. All right, Nancy boy? 371 00:17:42,115 --> 00:17:45,031 You're a shirt. 372 00:17:45,115 --> 00:17:48,031 OK, guys, let's go. 373 00:17:48,115 --> 00:17:50,407 - [whistle blows] - [coach] One, two, three! 374 00:17:50,490 --> 00:17:52,865 One, two, three! One, two, three! 375 00:17:52,949 --> 00:17:54,615 [♪ The Beat Bros.: Jump Up (If You Feel Alright)] 376 00:18:34,824 --> 00:18:37,115 , , [groaning] 377 00:18:37,198 --> 00:18:38,281 At ease, gentlemen. 378 00:18:38,365 --> 00:18:42,281 [cheerleaders cheering] 379 00:18:42,365 --> 00:18:47,115 I've seen a lot of energy and commitment out there today. 380 00:18:47,198 --> 00:18:49,448 And that makes a coach proud. 381 00:18:49,532 --> 00:18:53,115 Now, I want to split us up into first string and second string. 382 00:18:53,198 --> 00:18:56,949 You second-stringers, don't take it too hard. 383 00:18:57,031 --> 00:18:59,782 You're just as much part of this team as the first-stringers. 384 00:18:59,865 --> 00:19:01,949 Apart from, of course, 385 00:19:02,031 --> 00:19:03,281 playing the game part. 386 00:19:03,365 --> 00:19:05,323 Schuler. 387 00:19:07,407 --> 00:19:09,198 Haims. 388 00:19:11,532 --> 00:19:12,865 Potensky. 389 00:19:14,573 --> 00:19:16,490 Donner. 390 00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:20,115 Hastings. 391 00:19:20,198 --> 00:19:22,990 Second string. 392 00:19:23,073 --> 00:19:25,198 The rest of you, congratulations. 393 00:19:25,281 --> 00:19:26,281 First-stringers. 394 00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:27,907 Now, hit the showers. 395 00:19:29,949 --> 00:19:31,990 Shower time. 396 00:19:32,073 --> 00:19:34,198 Shower time? 397 00:19:40,073 --> 00:19:43,990 - Hastings! No shower for you. - OK. 398 00:19:44,073 --> 00:19:47,865 Principal Gold wants to see you in his office. 399 00:19:52,907 --> 00:19:57,198 I'm over. It's done. They know. 400 00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:02,240 Sebastian's file. 401 00:20:07,323 --> 00:20:09,824 [mumbling] Sebastian... 402 00:20:09,907 --> 00:20:12,281 Could it be any bigger? 403 00:20:13,281 --> 00:20:15,407 Mr. Hastings. 404 00:20:18,323 --> 00:20:20,323 Horatio Gold... 405 00:20:20,407 --> 00:20:21,990 ...headmaster. 406 00:20:22,073 --> 00:20:25,365 So very pleased to meet you. So very, very pleased. 407 00:20:25,448 --> 00:20:28,490 Hello, sir. Heard you wanted to see me. 408 00:20:28,573 --> 00:20:31,031 I'd like to say welcome. 409 00:20:31,115 --> 00:20:32,699 ♪ Welcome to Illyria ♪ 410 00:20:32,782 --> 00:20:35,198 ♪ Welcome, welcome, welcome welcome, welcome, welcome ♪ 411 00:20:35,281 --> 00:20:40,740 ♪ Welcome, welcome, welcome welcome to Illyria ♪ 412 00:20:40,824 --> 00:20:43,448 I just wanted to have you in to say welcome. 413 00:20:43,532 --> 00:20:44,907 See how you're doing. 414 00:20:44,990 --> 00:20:46,865 Ah... Yeah, I'm doing great, you know? 415 00:20:46,949 --> 00:20:49,073 Just... [clears throat] ...busy being a guy. 416 00:20:49,156 --> 00:20:51,115 Being a guy. Yeah. 417 00:20:51,198 --> 00:20:53,407 Well, let's take a look at your file, Sebastian. 418 00:20:53,490 --> 00:20:55,615 - And... - [rattling] 419 00:20:55,699 --> 00:20:59,949 Seems to be... stuck a bit. 420 00:21:00,031 --> 00:21:03,073 There we go. All right. 421 00:21:03,156 --> 00:21:05,490 OK. Well... 422 00:21:07,448 --> 00:21:13,115 [sighs] OK, you're busted. 423 00:21:13,198 --> 00:21:17,198 I know you don't wanna sit here and talk to the headmaster, but I won't take no for an answer. 424 00:21:17,281 --> 00:21:19,532 Now, have a sit in the headmaster's chair. 425 00:21:19,615 --> 00:21:21,740 Come on, have a sit. 426 00:21:21,824 --> 00:21:24,657 Sit it. 427 00:21:24,740 --> 00:21:29,073 So, Sebastian Hastings. 428 00:21:29,156 --> 00:21:30,323 How do you like campus? 429 00:21:30,407 --> 00:21:31,615 Beautiful. 430 00:21:31,699 --> 00:21:33,281 You've been inspired 431 00:21:33,365 --> 00:21:36,115 by the charcoal black and candy apple red? 432 00:21:36,198 --> 00:21:37,615 You know it. 433 00:21:37,699 --> 00:21:39,490 - [knocking] - Hey! 434 00:21:39,573 --> 00:21:43,448 Don't touch it. Ever. Ever. Do not do that. 435 00:21:43,532 --> 00:21:47,490 You know, Sebastian, I was a transfer student myself... 436 00:21:47,573 --> 00:21:49,115 ...once upon a time. 437 00:21:49,198 --> 00:21:50,990 Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth. 438 00:21:51,073 --> 00:21:53,156 [laughs] So I keep a special interest 439 00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:55,824 in the transfer students that come to this school. 440 00:21:55,907 --> 00:21:59,448 Act as a... unofficial big brother. 441 00:21:59,532 --> 00:22:03,824 Don't be surprised if I just pop in unannounced from time to time just to check up. 442 00:22:03,907 --> 00:22:07,198 Yeah, I look forward to it. [laughs] 443 00:22:07,281 --> 00:22:09,782 Now scoot! 444 00:22:13,699 --> 00:22:15,532 - Ahh! - Sorry. 445 00:22:15,615 --> 00:22:17,782 - That's OK. Don't worry about it. - My fault. 446 00:22:17,865 --> 00:22:19,323 What is...? 447 00:22:19,407 --> 00:22:24,198 Ohh. Getting to know the opposite sex, are we? 448 00:22:24,281 --> 00:22:28,156 Male-female dynamics. All that sexual tension. 449 00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:31,615 It's all part of the high school experience. So continue. Please. 450 00:22:31,699 --> 00:22:33,657 But keep it clean, though. OK. 451 00:22:33,740 --> 00:22:35,949 Abstinence is key. Abstinence is... 452 00:22:36,031 --> 00:22:38,657 The best way to not is to not. 453 00:22:38,740 --> 00:22:40,281 [laughing] Uh... 454 00:22:40,365 --> 00:22:42,323 Hmm? Yes. 455 00:22:42,407 --> 00:22:46,323 - [door closes] - [laughs] 456 00:22:46,407 --> 00:22:48,824 Is he always that friendly? 457 00:22:48,907 --> 00:22:51,365 Are you kidding? That's him being rude. 458 00:22:51,448 --> 00:22:53,365 Huh. 459 00:22:53,448 --> 00:22:54,699 All right. 460 00:22:54,782 --> 00:22:56,198 Ooh, cute shoes. 461 00:22:56,281 --> 00:22:57,740 You think so? I got them at Anthropologie. 462 00:22:57,824 --> 00:22:59,407 No way! They have shoes there? 463 00:22:59,490 --> 00:23:04,198 - Oh, yeah. Right by the accessories. - Huh. 464 00:23:04,281 --> 00:23:06,365 [clears throat] Here are your books. 465 00:23:06,448 --> 00:23:08,031 Thanks. 466 00:23:08,115 --> 00:23:09,699 Well, I guess I'm gonna, 467 00:23:09,782 --> 00:23:13,740 you know, go take care of some guy stuff. 468 00:23:13,824 --> 00:23:15,240 OK. 469 00:23:18,323 --> 00:23:23,323 There you go. Have a great apple and sandwich. 470 00:23:23,407 --> 00:23:24,740 [boy] Hi! I would love a... 471 00:23:24,824 --> 00:23:25,865 - No. - But... 472 00:23:25,949 --> 00:23:29,448 Hey, dudes. Mind if I join? 473 00:23:30,115 --> 00:23:31,407 Thanks. 474 00:23:31,490 --> 00:23:33,907 So those soccer tryouts were bogus, huh? 475 00:23:33,990 --> 00:23:39,323 I mean, second string? Come on, that's ridiculous. Am I right? Am I right? 476 00:23:41,365 --> 00:23:44,073 So the game against Cornwall, that should be interesting. 477 00:23:44,156 --> 00:23:45,907 And why would that be interesting? 478 00:23:45,990 --> 00:23:47,907 Well, my sister goes there, 479 00:23:47,990 --> 00:23:50,907 and she used to date that tool Justin Drayton. 480 00:23:50,990 --> 00:23:52,740 - [all laughing] - I know him. 481 00:23:52,824 --> 00:23:55,448 - I made him cry once during a game. - Wait. 482 00:23:55,532 --> 00:23:57,407 - That was you? - Absolutely. 483 00:23:57,490 --> 00:23:59,407 - [Andrew] That was so funny. - Wow. 484 00:23:59,490 --> 00:24:01,949 Is your sister hot? 485 00:24:02,031 --> 00:24:05,949 Uhh... I guess so. 486 00:24:06,031 --> 00:24:07,782 She's got a great personality. 487 00:24:07,865 --> 00:24:09,865 - Ahh. - Eww. 488 00:24:09,990 --> 00:24:11,490 [coughs] Incoming. 489 00:24:15,907 --> 00:24:19,573 Oh, yeah! Check out the booty on that blondie. 490 00:24:19,657 --> 00:24:21,990 - Uh-oh. - Don't talk about her that way. 491 00:24:22,073 --> 00:24:24,115 Oh. Is that your girlfriend? 492 00:24:24,198 --> 00:24:26,907 [laughing] He wishes. 493 00:24:26,990 --> 00:24:29,615 [Andrew] She was dating this college guy, but he dumped her. 494 00:24:29,699 --> 00:24:32,115 I hear she's a total mess right now, really vulnerable. 495 00:24:32,198 --> 00:24:34,615 Confidence, self-esteem is way down. 496 00:24:34,699 --> 00:24:36,281 In man words, it's time to pounce. 497 00:24:36,365 --> 00:24:37,990 Exactly. 498 00:24:40,990 --> 00:24:43,323 [grunts] I hate that guy. 499 00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:50,240 Did you know bologna is 38 percent hoof? 500 00:24:50,323 --> 00:24:52,490 Thanks, Malcolm. 501 00:24:52,573 --> 00:24:55,448 Uh-oh. Looks like you got some competition. 502 00:24:55,532 --> 00:24:58,073 - It's just Malcolm. - [Andrew] Total geek. 503 00:25:00,073 --> 00:25:04,115 She looks so sad. It's heartbreaking. 504 00:25:04,198 --> 00:25:06,990 It... it's just... I can relate, you know? 505 00:25:07,073 --> 00:25:09,990 I mean, I just got out of a bad relationship too. 506 00:25:10,073 --> 00:25:13,281 I mean, you think you know someone. 507 00:25:13,365 --> 00:25:16,990 And you realize it's all been a big lie. 508 00:25:17,073 --> 00:25:19,156 Every touch. 509 00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:21,657 Every kiss. 510 00:25:21,740 --> 00:25:26,323 Plus, you know, you can never get chicks to shut up. 511 00:25:26,407 --> 00:25:29,365 All right, guys, catch up with you later. 512 00:25:29,448 --> 00:25:32,365 [crickets chirping] 513 00:25:36,907 --> 00:25:39,782 [whispering] Empty shower. 514 00:25:40,990 --> 00:25:42,699 Yes! 515 00:25:42,782 --> 00:25:44,699 ♪ I get to take a shower ♪ 516 00:25:44,782 --> 00:25:47,907 ♪ I get to take a shower ♪ 517 00:25:50,657 --> 00:25:53,365 Whoo! [giggles] 518 00:25:53,448 --> 00:25:54,407 [gasps] 519 00:25:54,490 --> 00:25:56,031 [gasps] 520 00:25:56,115 --> 00:25:59,198 Uh... Malcolm Festes, dorm director. 521 00:25:59,281 --> 00:26:01,407 Shower shoes are to be worn in the bathroom at all times 522 00:26:01,490 --> 00:26:04,031 except when in the actual shower. 523 00:26:04,115 --> 00:26:06,865 Did you not read your Dorm Life pamphlet? 524 00:26:06,949 --> 00:26:08,156 It was in your cubby. 525 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:10,532 - [whipping] - Ohh! 526 00:26:10,615 --> 00:26:12,699 Wassup, dawg? 527 00:26:12,782 --> 00:26:15,156 Yeah. OK, homey. 528 00:26:20,198 --> 00:26:22,240 Mm. Later. 529 00:26:22,323 --> 00:26:26,615 Hey. You forgot... this, Coolio. 530 00:26:26,699 --> 00:26:28,824 Word, G-Money. 531 00:26:30,156 --> 00:26:31,824 [laughs] 532 00:26:41,281 --> 00:26:43,490 [grunts] 533 00:26:48,031 --> 00:26:49,115 Ahh! 534 00:26:49,198 --> 00:26:51,990 OK, Hastings, you're up! 535 00:26:53,865 --> 00:26:55,365 Hastings, are you deaf?! 536 00:26:55,448 --> 00:26:58,240 Come on, let's go! 537 00:26:58,323 --> 00:27:01,824 Get your butt out there! [echoing] Come on! 538 00:27:01,907 --> 00:27:04,115 - Get out! - Ohh! 539 00:27:04,198 --> 00:27:06,573 [in slow-motion] Jesus! 540 00:27:10,699 --> 00:27:12,990 Whoa! Ohh! 541 00:27:15,657 --> 00:27:17,573 [growling] 542 00:27:20,198 --> 00:27:23,949 [screaming in slow-motion] 543 00:27:24,031 --> 00:27:25,782 - [ripping] - [screams] 544 00:27:25,865 --> 00:27:28,573 Come on, baby. Come on. 545 00:27:30,865 --> 00:27:33,532 [echoing] Ohh! 546 00:27:35,073 --> 00:27:38,323 [all laughing] 547 00:27:41,031 --> 00:27:43,365 - [coughing] - Rise and shine. 548 00:27:43,448 --> 00:27:46,031 - [all laughing] - [screaming] 549 00:27:46,115 --> 00:27:47,990 [high voice] Wait! Let go! 550 00:27:48,073 --> 00:27:49,156 [deep voice] Let go! 551 00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:52,740 Welcome to hell! 552 00:27:58,740 --> 00:28:04,490 Gentlemen! Let me present this year's soccer newbies! 553 00:28:04,573 --> 00:28:06,657 But first, you must remove your clothes! 554 00:28:06,740 --> 00:28:09,490 [boy] Remove their clothes! Remove their clothes! 555 00:28:09,573 --> 00:28:11,031 Take your clothes off now! 556 00:28:11,115 --> 00:28:13,156 Remove their clothes! Remove their clothes! 557 00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:15,073 [boys yelling] 558 00:28:23,073 --> 00:28:25,240 [fire alarm ringing] 559 00:28:26,782 --> 00:28:29,407 [phone ringing] 560 00:28:29,490 --> 00:28:31,699 Hello. My life sucks. 561 00:28:31,782 --> 00:28:33,073 - I'm done! - What? 562 00:28:33,156 --> 00:28:34,865 Everybody thinks I'm a huge loser deviant. 563 00:28:34,949 --> 00:28:37,031 I'll never see the field against Cornwall. 564 00:28:37,115 --> 00:28:40,323 And I smell so bad I'm convulsing people. 565 00:28:40,407 --> 00:28:41,907 Pick me up, take me home 566 00:28:41,990 --> 00:28:44,365 and make sure I never do anything like this again. 567 00:28:44,448 --> 00:28:46,198 Look, Vi, I don't know what to tell you 568 00:28:46,281 --> 00:28:49,365 about the whole soccer team... 569 00:28:49,448 --> 00:28:51,699 ...but as for the social stuff, I got an idea. 570 00:28:51,782 --> 00:28:54,198 - You do? - Yeah. 571 00:28:54,281 --> 00:28:57,532 We're gonna show everybody the man that you really are. 572 00:28:57,615 --> 00:28:59,323 And how are we gonna do that? 573 00:28:59,407 --> 00:29:00,865 Go, Viola. 574 00:29:00,949 --> 00:29:03,115 [♪ Shaggy: Hey, Sexy Lady] 575 00:29:03,198 --> 00:29:04,907 High five. 576 00:29:04,990 --> 00:29:06,740 Nice. 577 00:29:06,824 --> 00:29:09,740 Aw, man. Look who's here. 578 00:29:09,824 --> 00:29:11,782 Foxy mama. 579 00:29:11,865 --> 00:29:15,031 Uh.. uh... uh... don't look at him. Maybe he won't see us. 580 00:29:15,115 --> 00:29:18,281 Spread out so it looks like we got no room. 581 00:29:20,198 --> 00:29:22,740 - What's up? - [all] What's up? 582 00:29:22,824 --> 00:29:24,615 - Go, Kia. - [walkie-talkie rings] 583 00:29:24,699 --> 00:29:30,532 ♪ Hey, sexy lady I like your flow ♪ 584 00:29:30,615 --> 00:29:32,615 Hey, Sebastian. Mmm. 585 00:29:32,699 --> 00:29:35,865 Aw, Kia. 586 00:29:35,949 --> 00:29:37,907 Hey, girl. How you doing, baby? 587 00:29:37,990 --> 00:29:40,407 - Not the same without you. - I know. I'm sorry. 588 00:29:40,490 --> 00:29:43,532 New school, new babe pool. 589 00:29:43,615 --> 00:29:46,073 [Kia] I miss you, Sebastian. 590 00:29:46,156 --> 00:29:48,782 I've been thinking about you a lot. 591 00:29:48,865 --> 00:29:50,323 - Especially at night. - [Viola] Sweet. 592 00:29:50,407 --> 00:29:52,782 - [Kia] Late. - [Viola] Even better. 593 00:29:52,865 --> 00:29:54,615 OK, did she just say that to Sebastian? 594 00:29:54,699 --> 00:29:57,490 - What just happened? - Oh, Sebastian. 595 00:29:57,573 --> 00:30:00,740 OK, big, mournful sigh. "Uhh." Bittersweet farewell. 596 00:30:00,824 --> 00:30:02,240 You're his plaything, baby. 597 00:30:02,323 --> 00:30:04,448 It was really great to see you, Sebastian. 598 00:30:04,532 --> 00:30:07,865 Call me anytime. 599 00:30:11,156 --> 00:30:13,365 [sighs] 600 00:30:14,573 --> 00:30:16,156 I'd tap that. 601 00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:18,740 Thank you, Kia. You're gorgeous. And go, Yvonne. 602 00:30:18,824 --> 00:30:20,407 - [walkie-talkie beeps] - Women. 603 00:30:20,490 --> 00:30:22,615 - [all] Yeah. - Yeah, you know what I'm saying? 604 00:30:22,699 --> 00:30:24,448 [♪ Slightly Stoopid: Somebody] 605 00:30:24,532 --> 00:30:26,115 ♪ Aww, yeah ♪ 606 00:30:26,198 --> 00:30:28,699 Sebastian? Is that you? 607 00:30:28,782 --> 00:30:30,490 Hey, what's going on, Yvonne? 608 00:30:30,573 --> 00:30:32,615 - Who's this one? - [Yvonne] Nothing. 609 00:30:32,699 --> 00:30:36,615 I mean, our school lost its top gun, Sebastian Hastings. 610 00:30:36,699 --> 00:30:41,657 Well, time comes for a man to move along, Yvonne. 611 00:30:41,740 --> 00:30:44,365 I know, Sebastian. 612 00:30:44,448 --> 00:30:46,281 In the end I wasn't woman enough for you. 613 00:30:46,365 --> 00:30:47,990 [Viola] No, you weren't. 614 00:30:48,073 --> 00:30:50,699 [Yvonne] That's something I'll always have to live with. 615 00:30:50,782 --> 00:30:51,949 It just hurts, that's all. 616 00:30:52,031 --> 00:30:53,365 Love is pain. 617 00:30:53,448 --> 00:30:56,699 Just know I'll never forget you, Sebastian. 618 00:30:56,782 --> 00:31:01,198 Ever! [crying] Never! 619 00:31:03,573 --> 00:31:04,824 [sobbing] 620 00:31:04,907 --> 00:31:07,824 Needy. 621 00:31:07,907 --> 00:31:12,198 OK. We might need to do a little reevaluating here. 622 00:31:12,281 --> 00:31:14,323 - Yeah. - Hey there, pretty lady. 623 00:31:14,407 --> 00:31:18,532 Eww. What...? What are you, hitting on me? 624 00:31:18,615 --> 00:31:20,156 I was just... 625 00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:22,240 "I was just..." 626 00:31:22,323 --> 00:31:25,657 OK, let me put a stop to that little brain fart right now. 627 00:31:25,740 --> 00:31:27,532 Girls with asses like mine 628 00:31:27,615 --> 00:31:29,865 do not talk to boys with faces like yours. 629 00:31:29,949 --> 00:31:32,865 [laughing] 630 00:31:32,949 --> 00:31:37,448 I'm looking for my boyfriend Sebastian Hastings. Have you guys seen him? 631 00:31:39,115 --> 00:31:40,865 Sebastian? 632 00:31:40,949 --> 00:31:43,365 Not good. Don't let her get too close, she'll recognize you. 633 00:31:43,448 --> 00:31:45,532 What am I gonna do? 634 00:31:45,615 --> 00:31:48,031 - Keep away from me! - I beg your pardon?! 635 00:31:48,115 --> 00:31:51,073 Pretty ladies. OK, don't come any closer, Monique. 636 00:31:51,156 --> 00:31:53,073 - Sebastian! - It's over! 637 00:31:53,156 --> 00:31:54,949 What are you talking about?! 638 00:31:55,031 --> 00:31:57,740 - I don't want to talk to you, crazy! - Sebastian, come back here. 639 00:31:57,824 --> 00:31:59,865 You're hot, Monique. Smoking hot. 640 00:31:59,949 --> 00:32:01,907 Come here. Get! Get! Get! 641 00:32:01,990 --> 00:32:04,865 - But there are plenty of hot girls out there. - Come back here. 642 00:32:04,949 --> 00:32:08,240 And the truth is, you have absolutely 643 00:32:08,323 --> 00:32:10,240 nothing else to offer. 644 00:32:10,323 --> 00:32:14,073 And when my eyes are closed, I see you for what you truly are, 645 00:32:14,156 --> 00:32:16,073 which is ugly! 646 00:32:16,156 --> 00:32:17,907 We're done! 647 00:32:17,990 --> 00:32:19,573 [all cheering] 648 00:32:19,657 --> 00:32:20,740 [screams] 649 00:32:20,824 --> 00:32:24,281 Whoo! That was amazing! 650 00:32:24,365 --> 00:32:26,115 You the man! 651 00:32:26,198 --> 00:32:29,198 What's wrong with you guys? Make some room for the man. 652 00:32:29,281 --> 00:32:31,115 - Sit down! - Whoo-whee! 653 00:32:31,198 --> 00:32:34,907 You're officially my idol now, man. 654 00:32:34,990 --> 00:32:36,448 - There he is. - [applause] 655 00:32:36,532 --> 00:32:38,281 - What's up? - What's up, brothers? 656 00:32:38,365 --> 00:32:40,573 - Hey, Sebastian. - Lovelies. 657 00:32:40,657 --> 00:32:43,407 - Holler at your boy. - [Toby] Yo! Yo! Sebastian! 658 00:32:43,490 --> 00:32:45,240 Can you get out of my way right now? 659 00:32:45,323 --> 00:32:47,323 I need your advice. I got lady troubles. 660 00:32:47,407 --> 00:32:51,323 I'm here for you, bro. I got a lifetime of knowledge. 661 00:32:51,407 --> 00:32:53,323 How long did you date that girl? 662 00:32:53,407 --> 00:32:56,281 Too long. Ball and frickin' chain, man. 663 00:32:56,365 --> 00:33:00,156 [ringtone] ♪ I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world ♪ 664 00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:01,824 Dude. 665 00:33:01,907 --> 00:33:06,990 Justine. Chick won't stop dogging me, man. 666 00:33:07,073 --> 00:33:10,615 Oh, my God. Oh, my, God. She's in our class. 667 00:33:10,699 --> 00:33:13,490 Dude, quit blushing. That's lame. 668 00:33:13,573 --> 00:33:15,490 Shut up. I'm not blushing. 669 00:33:15,573 --> 00:33:17,824 Everyone, please take a slip 670 00:33:17,907 --> 00:33:20,949 and read off the name of your lab partner. 671 00:33:23,448 --> 00:33:24,740 "Eunice Bates." 672 00:33:25,782 --> 00:33:26,824 [laughing] 673 00:33:26,907 --> 00:33:29,281 Huh. You got to be kidding me. 674 00:33:29,365 --> 00:33:31,615 - Be nice. - Yeah. 675 00:33:31,699 --> 00:33:33,490 She got a little something-something. 676 00:33:33,573 --> 00:33:36,740 Yeah, asthma and headgear. [laughs] 677 00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:42,365 "Olivia Lennox." 678 00:33:42,448 --> 00:33:44,824 - You know her? - I talked to her for a second. 679 00:33:44,907 --> 00:33:46,323 About what? She gave you the nod. 680 00:33:46,407 --> 00:33:48,323 - She did a good one. - She gives good nod. 681 00:33:48,407 --> 00:33:50,323 Could everybody please calm down? 682 00:33:50,407 --> 00:33:53,490 I can't believe you got her as a lab par... Switch with me. 683 00:33:53,573 --> 00:33:56,657 I can't. I said her name out loud. 684 00:33:59,615 --> 00:34:02,699 Some guys just walk in the light, you know? 685 00:34:02,782 --> 00:34:04,865 - Hello again. - Hello. 686 00:34:04,949 --> 00:34:08,031 I don't think we introduced ourselves before. I'm Sebastian. 687 00:34:08,115 --> 00:34:09,323 Olivia. 688 00:34:15,615 --> 00:34:21,740 I'm gonna be the best lab partner you ever had. [gasps] 689 00:34:21,824 --> 00:34:23,907 Cool. 690 00:34:23,990 --> 00:34:26,198 I gotta be completely honest. 691 00:34:26,281 --> 00:34:28,907 The whole dissecting thing kind of freaks me out. 692 00:34:28,990 --> 00:34:31,865 So, uh, think you may have to take the reins on this one. 693 00:34:31,949 --> 00:34:35,573 Wow. Most guys would never admit that. [laughs] 694 00:34:35,657 --> 00:34:37,073 Oh, crap, you're right. 695 00:34:37,156 --> 00:34:39,073 No, don't worry. I think it's refreshing. 696 00:34:39,156 --> 00:34:42,073 - You do? - No paper near the Bunsen burner. 697 00:34:42,156 --> 00:34:45,740 - Wait. - What's this? Poems? 698 00:34:45,824 --> 00:34:48,073 Lyrics. They're his... 699 00:34:48,156 --> 00:34:50,573 My... my old stuff. 700 00:34:50,657 --> 00:34:54,198 "Wake up, I've been waiting for you." 701 00:34:59,156 --> 00:35:02,907 Those are really good. So honest. 702 00:35:02,990 --> 00:35:07,240 I know. I keep telling him... me... meself... my... myself... 703 00:35:07,323 --> 00:35:09,240 I write songs too, Olivia. 704 00:35:09,323 --> 00:35:11,281 - Really, Malcolm? Wonderful. - Check it out. 705 00:35:11,365 --> 00:35:14,407 ♪ I see you through your window ♪ 706 00:35:14,490 --> 00:35:19,323 ♪ I'm standing on a tree outside ♪ 707 00:35:22,699 --> 00:35:24,323 Aww! 708 00:35:24,407 --> 00:35:25,949 You, you sit. 709 00:35:26,031 --> 00:35:29,824 - [snaps fingers] - You, go. Go! 710 00:35:29,907 --> 00:35:33,073 - Did you say anything about me? - No. Was I supposed to? 711 00:35:33,156 --> 00:35:35,115 Come on. This is perfect. 712 00:35:35,198 --> 00:35:38,490 You get to spend an hour with her every other day. 713 00:35:38,573 --> 00:35:40,740 You can convince her to go out with me. 714 00:35:40,824 --> 00:35:43,323 Dude, she had that option for three and a half years. 715 00:35:43,407 --> 00:35:45,657 I'll tell you what. You do this, 716 00:35:45,740 --> 00:35:47,323 I'll work with you on your soccer. 717 00:35:47,407 --> 00:35:50,323 I'll make you good enough to make first string. 718 00:35:50,407 --> 00:35:52,657 - By the Cornwall game? - Absolutely. 719 00:35:52,740 --> 00:35:54,907 OK, yeah. You got a deal. 720 00:35:54,990 --> 00:35:57,824 - You're the man. - Yes, I am. 721 00:35:57,907 --> 00:36:01,740 [♪ Chali 2na: International] 722 00:36:12,073 --> 00:36:14,365 [alarm buzzing] 723 00:37:40,323 --> 00:37:41,990 Ah! 724 00:37:48,031 --> 00:37:49,907 [all gasping] 725 00:37:49,990 --> 00:37:51,740 Oh. Right. 726 00:37:51,824 --> 00:37:57,115 Oww! Oh, for the love of God! It burns! 727 00:37:57,198 --> 00:37:58,699 It just isn't fair, Malvolio. 728 00:37:58,782 --> 00:38:00,573 I wait three years for Olivia, 729 00:38:00,657 --> 00:38:02,448 and then some transfer student comes in 730 00:38:02,532 --> 00:38:04,990 and suddenly she's acting like some... 731 00:38:05,073 --> 00:38:08,657 ...obsessed love-struck teenager. 732 00:38:08,740 --> 00:38:11,615 I'm not gonna take that lying down, Malvolio! 733 00:38:11,699 --> 00:38:14,573 - [Malvolio squeaking] - Yeah, I know. I know. 734 00:38:14,657 --> 00:38:17,323 You're absolutely right. 735 00:38:17,407 --> 00:38:19,657 I'll do some digging, I'll find out what it is, 736 00:38:19,740 --> 00:38:23,073 and I'll nip his chances with Olivia right in the bud. 737 00:38:23,156 --> 00:38:24,824 [Malvolio squeaking] 738 00:38:24,907 --> 00:38:28,281 What's that? Oh, yeah, sure. A walk. Sorry. Come on. 739 00:38:28,365 --> 00:38:31,407 - [squeaking] - You are so smart. 740 00:38:31,490 --> 00:38:33,115 - [cell phone ringing] - Hello. 741 00:38:33,198 --> 00:38:35,490 - Miss me? - What's going on? 742 00:38:35,573 --> 00:38:37,156 What's wrong with your voice? 743 00:38:37,240 --> 00:38:39,573 [clears throat] I just have a little bit of a cold. 744 00:38:39,657 --> 00:38:41,990 So... [coughs] I'm still a little phlegmy. 745 00:38:42,073 --> 00:38:44,115 - Did you call my school? - Yeah. 746 00:38:44,198 --> 00:38:45,615 It's all taken care of. 747 00:38:45,699 --> 00:38:47,448 Just make sure you're back by the 12th. 748 00:38:47,532 --> 00:38:49,490 It was so cool, Vi. 749 00:38:49,573 --> 00:38:52,615 We went on a couple days early, and the crowd flipped for us. 750 00:38:52,699 --> 00:38:53,990 They wanted an encore, 751 00:38:54,073 --> 00:38:56,031 so we did one of my songs acoustically. 752 00:38:56,115 --> 00:38:58,532 - They went nuts for my lyrics. - Oh, that's so cool. 753 00:38:58,615 --> 00:39:00,323 And you were right about Monique. 754 00:39:00,407 --> 00:39:01,865 She's history. 755 00:39:01,949 --> 00:39:04,115 She really is, isn't she? 756 00:39:04,198 --> 00:39:06,031 I got to go. I'll talk to you later. 757 00:39:06,115 --> 00:39:08,615 OK. Bye. 758 00:39:08,699 --> 00:39:11,490 Trouble with your wig, Hastings? 759 00:39:11,573 --> 00:39:14,448 Uh, no, I actually... I have a scalp condition. 760 00:39:14,532 --> 00:39:16,156 - No, you don't. - Yeah, I do. 761 00:39:16,240 --> 00:39:18,824 I really do. It's really acting up during the... 762 00:39:18,907 --> 00:39:20,990 No, you don't. 763 00:39:21,073 --> 00:39:23,490 You've got male pattern baldness. 764 00:39:23,573 --> 00:39:25,657 Scoot over, kiddo. 765 00:39:25,740 --> 00:39:27,782 I don't know if you've realized, 766 00:39:27,865 --> 00:39:30,156 but recently I've started to thin out myself. 767 00:39:30,240 --> 00:39:33,365 I've tried all the creams and the butters, 768 00:39:33,448 --> 00:39:36,407 and I still can't seem to stop Mother Nature's vindictive fury, 769 00:39:36,490 --> 00:39:39,156 and neither can you. OK? 770 00:39:39,240 --> 00:39:41,198 There's gonna be a time when you'll have to come out 771 00:39:41,281 --> 00:39:44,073 of the closet and just accept yourself for who you are. 772 00:39:44,156 --> 00:39:45,699 A baldy. OK? 773 00:39:45,782 --> 00:39:48,323 But it's gonna be all right. OK? 774 00:39:48,407 --> 00:39:52,073 Oh, and between you and me, chicks dig it. 775 00:39:52,156 --> 00:39:54,740 [laughs, roars] 776 00:39:54,824 --> 00:39:57,824 Hang ten. Yeah. 777 00:39:57,907 --> 00:40:00,365 [Malcolm] Hi, Olivia. I don't want you to be worried, 778 00:40:00,448 --> 00:40:01,407 but Malvolio's missing. 779 00:40:01,490 --> 00:40:03,365 - Oh, no! - Yeah. 780 00:40:03,448 --> 00:40:06,198 If you see him, don't feed him. He has an irritable bowel. 781 00:40:06,281 --> 00:40:08,865 Yeah. 'Cause that would be my very first instinct. 782 00:40:08,949 --> 00:40:12,281 To feed the tarantula. [laughs] 783 00:40:15,824 --> 00:40:17,573 [clears throat] Hmm. 784 00:40:17,657 --> 00:40:19,740 Here's a wild idea. 785 00:40:19,824 --> 00:40:23,031 Have you ever thought about going out with Duke Orsino? 786 00:40:23,115 --> 00:40:24,824 I see that. 787 00:40:25,990 --> 00:40:27,407 - Duke? - Yeah. 788 00:40:27,490 --> 00:40:28,740 - No. - Yeah. 789 00:40:28,824 --> 00:40:29,740 - No. - Yeah. 790 00:40:29,824 --> 00:40:31,699 - Yeah? - No! [laughs] 791 00:40:31,782 --> 00:40:34,198 I mean, he's good-looking and everything, 792 00:40:34,281 --> 00:40:37,281 but he's just not the guy for me. 793 00:40:37,365 --> 00:40:39,198 Hmm. I don't know. 794 00:40:39,281 --> 00:40:41,865 Think there may be more to him than you think there is. 795 00:40:41,949 --> 00:40:45,073 So you're telling me he's not just another dumb jock 796 00:40:45,156 --> 00:40:46,365 who wants to hook up with me 797 00:40:46,448 --> 00:40:48,699 so he could tell his friends, but too...? 798 00:40:48,782 --> 00:40:50,073 Insecure to treat you as an equal? 799 00:40:50,156 --> 00:40:51,907 Exactly. 800 00:40:51,990 --> 00:40:53,156 Tell me about it. 801 00:40:53,240 --> 00:40:54,782 You're the first guy at this school 802 00:40:54,865 --> 00:40:56,615 who hasn't tried anything with me. 803 00:40:56,699 --> 00:41:00,615 [laughs] Trust me, you're not my type. 804 00:41:00,699 --> 00:41:02,198 Well, why not? 805 00:41:04,240 --> 00:41:07,990 [clears throat] You know, it's just... 806 00:41:08,073 --> 00:41:10,448 ...I don't think of you in that way. 807 00:41:10,532 --> 00:41:12,073 We're friends, you know. 808 00:41:12,156 --> 00:41:14,490 You're actually one of the few people here 809 00:41:14,573 --> 00:41:16,949 that I feel comfortable around. 810 00:41:17,031 --> 00:41:19,407 I feel the same way about you. 811 00:41:19,490 --> 00:41:22,782 Good. Then just take my advice. 812 00:41:22,865 --> 00:41:25,949 Go out with Duke. 813 00:41:26,031 --> 00:41:29,323 I'll consider it. [laughs] 814 00:41:29,407 --> 00:41:32,782 So, uh, what is that exactly? 815 00:41:32,865 --> 00:41:35,156 Um, I think that's the spleen. 816 00:41:35,240 --> 00:41:37,657 Hmm. 817 00:41:37,740 --> 00:41:39,657 [crashing] 818 00:41:39,740 --> 00:41:43,615 - OK, who's your daddy? - Huh? 819 00:41:43,699 --> 00:41:45,990 I got her to agree to consider you. You're halfway in. 820 00:41:46,073 --> 00:41:50,657 Uhh! Um, all right, OK. So should I ask her out? 821 00:41:50,740 --> 00:41:52,490 No. You don't want to freak her out. 822 00:41:52,573 --> 00:41:56,407 You got to have a casual conversation first. Hello. 823 00:41:59,949 --> 00:42:03,323 Why do I get the feeling you don't do this very often? 824 00:42:03,407 --> 00:42:07,031 Man, I just... I'm not really good at talking to girls. 825 00:42:07,115 --> 00:42:09,281 - Why? You're hot! - What? 826 00:42:09,365 --> 00:42:11,865 [clears throat] You know, you're an appealing guy... 827 00:42:11,949 --> 00:42:14,824 Man... guy... guy-man. 828 00:42:14,907 --> 00:42:17,990 Look, I don't know. I just always say the wrong... 829 00:42:18,073 --> 00:42:20,156 [sighs] I just always say the wrong thing. 830 00:42:20,240 --> 00:42:24,073 OK. All right. Come on. Let's get up. 831 00:42:24,156 --> 00:42:25,824 I want to try something. 832 00:42:25,907 --> 00:42:27,865 I'll act like a girl, and you're going to talk to me. 833 00:42:27,949 --> 00:42:29,865 Eww. Do I have to? 834 00:42:29,949 --> 00:42:32,865 Yes! [high voice] Because I'm Viola. 835 00:42:32,949 --> 00:42:35,323 - Duke? Nice to meet you. - That was creepy. 836 00:42:35,407 --> 00:42:37,365 You really just sounded like a girl just then. 837 00:42:37,448 --> 00:42:39,657 I used to imitate my sister all the time. 838 00:42:39,740 --> 00:42:42,365 I got really good at it. Come on. And get up! 839 00:42:42,448 --> 00:42:45,323 Come on. Ask me some questions, 840 00:42:45,407 --> 00:42:48,365 and if the chemistry's right, things'll just start flowing. 841 00:42:48,448 --> 00:42:51,031 Oh... Um, questions about what? 842 00:42:51,115 --> 00:42:53,740 Anything. Ask me if... 843 00:42:53,824 --> 00:42:55,240 ...I like... 844 00:42:55,323 --> 00:42:56,281 ...cheese. 845 00:42:56,365 --> 00:42:59,365 Um, OK. 846 00:42:59,448 --> 00:43:01,782 Do you like cheese? 847 00:43:01,865 --> 00:43:04,740 Why, yes I do. My favorite's Gouda. 848 00:43:04,824 --> 00:43:08,573 - [laughs] I like Gouda too. - See? 849 00:43:08,657 --> 00:43:09,907 - See what? - We're flowing. 850 00:43:09,990 --> 00:43:11,907 We're talking about cheese. 851 00:43:11,990 --> 00:43:13,407 So what? Flow is flow. 852 00:43:13,490 --> 00:43:15,699 What? What's that? 853 00:43:15,782 --> 00:43:18,573 What is that?! It touched me! It touched me! It touched me! 854 00:43:18,657 --> 00:43:21,907 It's Malcolm's tarantula! Get it! 855 00:43:21,990 --> 00:43:24,532 - You get it! - You're the guy! 856 00:43:24,615 --> 00:43:25,782 The bigger guy. 857 00:43:25,865 --> 00:43:28,365 [both screaming] 858 00:43:33,115 --> 00:43:35,115 [both shriek] 859 00:43:36,031 --> 00:43:37,907 Sorry! 860 00:43:38,031 --> 00:43:41,281 You don't ever, ever do that girl voice again! 861 00:43:41,365 --> 00:43:43,323 - Freaked me out! - My bad. 862 00:43:43,407 --> 00:43:44,824 - [phone rings] - [both scream] 863 00:43:44,907 --> 00:43:47,782 [electric guitar plays, beeps] 864 00:43:47,865 --> 00:43:50,156 [Mom] Sebastian, honey, this is your mother. 865 00:43:50,240 --> 00:43:53,156 I'm calling to remind you about the carnival tomorrow. 866 00:43:53,240 --> 00:43:56,448 You and your sister promised you'd both be there. Bye-bye. 867 00:43:56,532 --> 00:44:00,448 Crap! Forgot about that! 868 00:44:00,532 --> 00:44:02,573 Wait, your mom's in Junior League? 869 00:44:02,657 --> 00:44:03,907 Yeah. How'd you know? 870 00:44:03,990 --> 00:44:06,490 So is mine. I gotta go too. 871 00:44:06,573 --> 00:44:08,156 But I can't deal with this right now. 872 00:44:08,240 --> 00:44:09,907 I have soccer to worry about. 873 00:44:09,990 --> 00:44:12,115 Not gonna be that bad. 874 00:44:12,198 --> 00:44:13,240 Olivia's gonna be there. 875 00:44:13,323 --> 00:44:14,573 It's a perfect opportunity 876 00:44:14,657 --> 00:44:16,240 for me to lay some groundwork. 877 00:44:16,323 --> 00:44:19,073 Oh, Olivia's gonna be there. 878 00:44:19,156 --> 00:44:20,615 And my sister. 879 00:44:20,699 --> 00:44:23,323 And Monique. And you. 880 00:44:23,407 --> 00:44:25,448 And my mom. 881 00:44:25,532 --> 00:44:27,699 Great. 882 00:44:27,782 --> 00:44:28,824 [♪ Goldfrapp: Ooh La La] 883 00:44:28,907 --> 00:44:31,115 ♪ Dial up ♪ 884 00:44:31,198 --> 00:44:35,615 - [kid laughing] - ♪ My number now ♪ 885 00:44:35,699 --> 00:44:37,657 ♪ Weaving it ♪ 886 00:44:37,740 --> 00:44:39,824 Dunk toss. 887 00:44:39,907 --> 00:44:40,949 Hey, dude! 888 00:44:41,031 --> 00:44:43,156 I will cut you, man. 889 00:44:43,240 --> 00:44:46,156 I'll tell you the truth. I never really liked carnivals. 890 00:44:46,240 --> 00:44:51,990 Hey. I'm working the kissing booth. Come see me. 891 00:44:52,073 --> 00:44:54,699 I love carnivals, man. 892 00:44:54,782 --> 00:44:56,365 Hey, Duke, where you going? 893 00:44:56,448 --> 00:44:58,865 Where do you think I'm going? 894 00:45:00,699 --> 00:45:02,240 - Uh-oh. - What's up? 895 00:45:02,323 --> 00:45:04,740 Oh, nothing. Um, just my psycho ex. 896 00:45:04,824 --> 00:45:06,490 I don't really wanna deal with her. 897 00:45:06,573 --> 00:45:08,156 So if you guys don't mind, 898 00:45:08,240 --> 00:45:10,407 I'm gonna lay low for a little while. 899 00:45:10,490 --> 00:45:13,740 - Cool. Catch you later. - OK. 900 00:45:13,824 --> 00:45:15,907 - Up you go! - Whoa! 901 00:45:17,949 --> 00:45:20,824 I see a kitten... 902 00:45:20,907 --> 00:45:23,532 ...gasping for air. 903 00:45:23,615 --> 00:45:26,907 [gasping] 904 00:45:26,990 --> 00:45:29,907 - Sorry. Pretty urgent. - Oh... 905 00:45:33,573 --> 00:45:35,532 It's all yours. 906 00:45:35,615 --> 00:45:38,365 - Hi, Mom! - Oh! 907 00:45:38,448 --> 00:45:42,407 You look like such a lady. It's a miracle. 908 00:45:42,490 --> 00:45:44,573 - It really is. - So Monique's getting you 909 00:45:44,657 --> 00:45:46,907 all excited about being a debutante, huh? 910 00:45:46,990 --> 00:45:50,198 Super-duper excited. Have a good carnival. 911 00:45:50,281 --> 00:45:53,448 Ohh! Ho, my little petunia. Where do you think you're going? 912 00:45:53,532 --> 00:45:55,740 You have the next shift at the kissing booth. 913 00:45:55,824 --> 00:45:58,198 And your brother? He's late for the cotton candy cart. 914 00:45:58,281 --> 00:46:00,407 I'm gonna go look for him. Bye. 915 00:46:00,490 --> 00:46:02,407 [♪ The Veronicas: 4ever] 916 00:46:02,490 --> 00:46:04,073 ♪ Here we are so what you gonna do? ♪ 917 00:46:04,156 --> 00:46:05,240 - Ow! - Sorry. 918 00:46:05,323 --> 00:46:07,907 Excuse you. 919 00:46:07,990 --> 00:46:11,198 - Wait, do I know you? - No. 920 00:46:11,281 --> 00:46:13,198 Excuse me. 921 00:46:13,281 --> 00:46:15,073 Viola! Hey, hey, hey. 922 00:46:15,156 --> 00:46:17,407 Where you been? I've been calling and calling. 923 00:46:17,490 --> 00:46:18,949 I miss you. We need to talk. 924 00:46:19,031 --> 00:46:21,448 We've talked, Justin. All the talking is done. 925 00:46:21,532 --> 00:46:25,490 [laughs] Look, no one breaks up over a stupid soccer issue, OK? 926 00:46:25,573 --> 00:46:27,573 Can you just be a girl for five seconds? 927 00:46:27,657 --> 00:46:29,448 For five seconds? 928 00:46:29,532 --> 00:46:33,323 OK, um, first of all, it's not a stupid soccer issue, 929 00:46:33,407 --> 00:46:34,740 and you're a jerk. 930 00:46:34,824 --> 00:46:36,782 Oh, look at that! Time's up! 931 00:46:36,865 --> 00:46:38,615 ♪ Come on, baby we ain't gonna live forever ♪ 932 00:46:38,699 --> 00:46:43,240 Excuse me. Sorry. One, please. 933 00:46:43,323 --> 00:46:46,448 ♪ You know you wanna be together ♪ 934 00:46:46,532 --> 00:46:49,490 ♪ And I wanna spend the night with you ♪ 935 00:46:49,573 --> 00:46:51,448 ♪ Come with me tonight ♪ 936 00:46:51,532 --> 00:46:56,407 ♪ We could make the night last forever, ohh ♪ 937 00:46:56,490 --> 00:46:59,740 ♪ Let's pretend you're mine ♪ 938 00:46:59,824 --> 00:47:02,156 ♪ We could just pretend We could just pretend ♪ 939 00:47:02,240 --> 00:47:05,115 ♪ Oh, come on ♪ 940 00:47:05,198 --> 00:47:08,615 ♪ Just one taste and you'll want more ♪ 941 00:47:08,699 --> 00:47:13,740 ♪ So tell me what you're waiting for ♪ 942 00:47:17,448 --> 00:47:19,615 Stay in school. 943 00:47:19,699 --> 00:47:22,657 ♪ Come on, baby we ain't gonna live forever ♪ 944 00:47:22,740 --> 00:47:26,657 ♪ Let me show you all the things that we could do ♪ 945 00:47:26,740 --> 00:47:28,699 ♪ You know you wanna be together ♪ 946 00:47:28,782 --> 00:47:31,615 Sebastian? Sebastian! 947 00:47:31,699 --> 00:47:34,490 - Sebastian! Where are you going? - Monique's behind me. 948 00:47:34,573 --> 00:47:37,365 - We're on it. - [Monique] Sebastian! 949 00:47:39,949 --> 00:47:42,865 [grunts] 950 00:47:42,949 --> 00:47:44,323 Ahh! 951 00:47:44,407 --> 00:47:46,115 Excuse me. No one over 8 years old 952 00:47:46,198 --> 00:47:47,699 is allowed inside the Moon Bounce. 953 00:47:47,782 --> 00:47:49,573 But I just saw my boyfriend go in there. 954 00:47:49,657 --> 00:47:51,365 The correct term is "ex-boyfriend." 955 00:47:51,448 --> 00:47:54,699 No relationship is over until I say it is. Understand? 956 00:47:54,782 --> 00:47:57,323 Whatever. You're still not getting on that Moon Bounce. 957 00:47:57,407 --> 00:47:59,240 Fine. 958 00:48:00,824 --> 00:48:02,782 [♪ Dressy Bessy: Side 2] 959 00:48:04,323 --> 00:48:05,532 What's that? 960 00:48:05,615 --> 00:48:07,490 Kia, don't look. 961 00:48:07,573 --> 00:48:10,156 Oh! God! 962 00:48:12,156 --> 00:48:14,115 [kids screaming] 963 00:48:23,240 --> 00:48:26,407 - She's gone. - Thank you. 964 00:48:26,490 --> 00:48:29,365 - So are we, uh, having fun? - Oh, yeah, definitely. 965 00:48:29,448 --> 00:48:33,573 - [laughing] - Whoo. 966 00:48:33,657 --> 00:48:35,240 What do you think it will be like? 967 00:48:35,323 --> 00:48:37,115 [Toby] Duke, you look at me. 968 00:48:37,198 --> 00:48:41,365 I know it's gonna be really, really special. 969 00:48:41,448 --> 00:48:44,073 I mean, she's only kissed like 350 guys at this point. 970 00:48:44,156 --> 00:48:46,907 I just think we need to acknowledge the moment. 971 00:48:46,990 --> 00:48:48,865 After four years, Duke is finally 972 00:48:48,949 --> 00:48:51,365 gonna fulfill his destiny. 973 00:48:51,448 --> 00:48:56,240 Life is good. Life is fair. Life is just. 974 00:48:56,323 --> 00:48:58,073 - Hi, um, I'm your relief. - [gasps] 975 00:48:58,156 --> 00:48:59,407 And yet.... 976 00:48:59,490 --> 00:49:00,407 Thank God. 977 00:49:00,490 --> 00:49:02,198 I can't catch a break. 978 00:49:02,281 --> 00:49:07,407 Beware of the old guy chewing gum. It's not gum. 979 00:49:07,490 --> 00:49:08,907 Echh. 980 00:49:08,990 --> 00:49:12,115 - Do I know you? - No. [laughing] 981 00:49:12,198 --> 00:49:15,615 - Huh. - That's just my luck. 982 00:49:15,699 --> 00:49:18,615 No. No, no, no. I mean, I didn't mean it like that. 983 00:49:18,699 --> 00:49:22,115 It's just, you know, she's, you know.... No. OK. 984 00:49:22,198 --> 00:49:26,156 I mean, on the other hand, you're, you know, also... 985 00:49:26,240 --> 00:49:30,073 - I am? Thanks, I guess. - Yeah. 986 00:49:30,156 --> 00:49:32,407 You don't have to flirt with her first, genius. 987 00:49:32,490 --> 00:49:33,740 You're paying for it. 988 00:49:33,824 --> 00:49:38,657 Why don't you just... relax. Um... 989 00:49:38,740 --> 00:49:42,323 Um, maybe I should kiss you now. 990 00:49:42,407 --> 00:49:46,782 I gave that girl my ticket, and I waited in line. 991 00:49:46,865 --> 00:49:49,949 Well, it's the least I can do. [laughs] 992 00:49:50,031 --> 00:49:52,490 [both sigh] 993 00:49:52,573 --> 00:49:57,448 Uh, OK. Here I go. 994 00:49:57,532 --> 00:50:01,907 Um... [laughs nervously] Uh... 995 00:50:09,407 --> 00:50:11,365 OK, I think that was one ticket's worth. 996 00:50:11,448 --> 00:50:13,031 No, you get a little bit more. 997 00:50:13,115 --> 00:50:15,990 Excuse me. The motel's across the street. 998 00:50:16,073 --> 00:50:17,699 Viola, what the hell is this?! 999 00:50:17,782 --> 00:50:19,949 Back of the line, buttball. 1000 00:50:20,031 --> 00:50:23,281 Excuse me, doofus. You're making out with my girlfriend. 1001 00:50:23,365 --> 00:50:25,532 Ex-girlfriend. 1002 00:50:25,615 --> 00:50:27,323 Whoa, you're Sebastian's sister? 1003 00:50:27,407 --> 00:50:29,657 - And you're about to die. - [laughs] 1004 00:50:29,740 --> 00:50:31,490 Are you gonna drown me in your tears? 1005 00:50:31,573 --> 00:50:33,990 I did not cry during that game. I had something in my eye. 1006 00:50:34,073 --> 00:50:36,824 You know what, guys? Can we just dial it down? 1007 00:50:36,907 --> 00:50:39,532 And just step away, OK? 1008 00:50:39,615 --> 00:50:42,031 She's right. I'll see you on the soccer field, 1009 00:50:42,115 --> 00:50:44,699 and we'll settle this all then. 1010 00:50:44,782 --> 00:50:46,573 OK, Duke. 1011 00:50:46,657 --> 00:50:49,532 Or we can straighten it out right here. 1012 00:50:49,615 --> 00:50:51,740 Justin! Stop it! Guys! 1013 00:50:51,824 --> 00:50:54,198 [♪ Spiderbait: Put It Down] 1014 00:50:54,281 --> 00:50:56,198 ♪ All right ♪ 1015 00:50:56,281 --> 00:50:58,031 Stop it! Justin! 1016 00:50:58,115 --> 00:51:00,615 Guys! Stop it! 1017 00:51:03,407 --> 00:51:07,448 Justin, get off! 1018 00:51:10,281 --> 00:51:13,907 [screaming] 1019 00:51:17,323 --> 00:51:19,949 Where's my daughter?! 1020 00:51:20,031 --> 00:51:22,031 Excuse me. I'm so sorry. 1021 00:51:22,115 --> 00:51:25,740 Viola! Stop! This isn't ladylike. 1022 00:51:25,824 --> 00:51:28,407 There is no room for violence here! 1023 00:51:28,490 --> 00:51:32,907 This is a lovely children's carnival, goddamn it! 1024 00:51:32,990 --> 00:51:35,949 Both of you, out! Now! 1025 00:51:40,490 --> 00:51:42,865 Where were you at today? You just disappeared. 1026 00:51:42,949 --> 00:51:46,073 Ran into my psycho ex. Had to bolt. 1027 00:51:46,156 --> 00:51:48,240 Oh, my God! Is that a...? 1028 00:51:48,323 --> 00:51:51,240 What? Oh. Yeah. 1029 00:51:51,323 --> 00:51:55,573 I hope you don't mind. I kind of borrowed one of your... 1030 00:51:55,657 --> 00:51:58,740 Yeah. And you're right, by the way. These things actually work. 1031 00:51:58,824 --> 00:52:00,949 Oh, my God, you're bleeding. Are you OK? 1032 00:52:01,031 --> 00:52:03,281 - Um... - [clears throat] I mean, 1033 00:52:03,365 --> 00:52:05,907 suck it up! Be a man! 1034 00:52:05,990 --> 00:52:07,615 Rub some dirt in it! 1035 00:52:07,699 --> 00:52:10,490 [laughing] OK, I'll rub some dirt on it. 1036 00:52:10,573 --> 00:52:13,657 So, what happened? 1037 00:52:13,740 --> 00:52:15,949 I got into it with your sister's ex. 1038 00:52:16,031 --> 00:52:19,448 Wait. Really? Why? 1039 00:52:19,532 --> 00:52:24,407 He saw me and her kind of making out at the kissing booth. 1040 00:52:24,490 --> 00:52:27,281 Wait. You kissed her? 1041 00:52:27,365 --> 00:52:30,240 Yeah, man, I'm... I hope that's OK. 1042 00:52:30,323 --> 00:52:32,115 It was for charity. 1043 00:52:32,198 --> 00:52:35,281 Oh, no, I mean, dude, I mean, 1044 00:52:35,365 --> 00:52:39,281 if you want to kiss her, you go right ahead and you kiss her! 1045 00:52:39,365 --> 00:52:41,031 I mean, knock yourself out. 1046 00:52:41,115 --> 00:52:44,782 I mean, you just... you take her and then kiss her 1047 00:52:44,865 --> 00:52:46,365 and then kiss the crap out of her! 1048 00:52:46,448 --> 00:52:49,240 OK. 1049 00:52:52,407 --> 00:52:54,824 So... [clears throat] 1050 00:52:54,907 --> 00:52:56,281 ...do you like her? 1051 00:52:56,365 --> 00:53:00,323 I don't know. Can we not talk about this? 1052 00:53:00,407 --> 00:53:02,031 She's your sister. It's kind of weird. 1053 00:53:02,115 --> 00:53:04,115 No. Right. Right. 1054 00:53:04,198 --> 00:53:09,156 Just... You know, I was just thinking that, 1055 00:53:09,240 --> 00:53:11,782 if you liked her then... 1056 00:53:11,865 --> 00:53:14,323 ...maybe you should ask her out. 1057 00:53:14,407 --> 00:53:17,615 And just, I don't know, forget about Olivia? 1058 00:53:17,699 --> 00:53:22,073 Well, I mean speaking as a completely objective 1059 00:53:22,156 --> 00:53:23,865 third-party outsider 1060 00:53:23,949 --> 00:53:27,532 with absolutely no personal interest in the matter, 1061 00:53:27,615 --> 00:53:31,240 I am not sure that you and Olivia 1062 00:53:31,323 --> 00:53:34,532 really mesh well together. You know? I mean... 1063 00:53:34,615 --> 00:53:37,865 But you and Viola... 1064 00:53:37,949 --> 00:53:40,198 ...I mean... 1065 00:53:40,281 --> 00:53:41,699 ...be magic. 1066 00:53:41,782 --> 00:53:43,031 I don't know. 1067 00:53:43,115 --> 00:53:44,865 What does your heart tell you? 1068 00:53:44,949 --> 00:53:47,365 - Huh? - I mean, 1069 00:53:47,448 --> 00:53:48,865 which one would you rather see naked?! 1070 00:53:48,949 --> 00:53:52,365 Why do you...? Why? Why do you always do that? 1071 00:53:52,448 --> 00:53:54,031 Why do you always talk about girls 1072 00:53:54,115 --> 00:53:56,865 in such graphic terms? Huh? 1073 00:53:56,949 --> 00:53:59,198 You know what? You... you have issues. 1074 00:53:59,281 --> 00:54:03,532 You're a really sensitive guy, aren't you? 1075 00:54:03,615 --> 00:54:08,407 What? No. No, it's just... 1076 00:54:08,490 --> 00:54:11,073 I don't know. I just think that 1077 00:54:11,156 --> 00:54:15,407 relationships should be more than just the physical stuff. 1078 00:54:15,490 --> 00:54:18,073 Don't get me wrong, that stuff's important, 1079 00:54:18,156 --> 00:54:19,573 but, I don't know, when I'm with someone, 1080 00:54:19,657 --> 00:54:23,740 I want to be able to talk about other stuff. 1081 00:54:23,824 --> 00:54:26,740 Like, I don't know, serious stuff. 1082 00:54:26,824 --> 00:54:30,990 Stuff I can't talk about, you know, with anyone else. 1083 00:54:33,156 --> 00:54:36,407 Yeah, like... 1084 00:54:36,490 --> 00:54:39,115 ...what kind of stuff? 1085 00:54:39,198 --> 00:54:41,532 [laughing] I don't know, just stuff. 1086 00:54:41,615 --> 00:54:44,990 Like, whatever stuff there is. 1087 00:54:45,073 --> 00:54:48,657 Like... this kind of stuff? 1088 00:54:48,740 --> 00:54:52,156 Yeah. 1089 00:54:52,240 --> 00:54:54,907 But what I just told you is for your ears only. 1090 00:54:54,990 --> 00:54:59,031 If you tell anyone, I'll kick your ass. 1091 00:55:02,073 --> 00:55:04,281 Yeah. No. 1092 00:55:04,365 --> 00:55:07,573 I got your back, man. 1093 00:55:07,657 --> 00:55:10,657 It's cool. 1094 00:55:10,740 --> 00:55:13,407 [♪ O.A.R.: Love and Memories] 1095 00:55:17,865 --> 00:55:21,824 ♪ Love me faster than the devil ♪ 1096 00:55:21,907 --> 00:55:25,782 ♪ Run me straight into the ground ♪ 1097 00:55:25,865 --> 00:55:30,156 ♪ Drowning deep inside your water ♪ 1098 00:55:30,240 --> 00:55:33,865 ♪ Drowning deep inside your sound ♪ 1099 00:55:33,949 --> 00:55:37,699 ♪ Love me faster than the devil ♪ 1100 00:55:37,782 --> 00:55:41,490 ♪ Run me straight into the ground ♪ 1101 00:55:41,573 --> 00:55:46,115 ♪ Drowning deep inside your water ♪ 1102 00:55:46,198 --> 00:55:50,365 ♪ Drown in love and memories ♪ 1103 00:56:04,699 --> 00:56:07,115 ♪ Didn't you love me ♪ 1104 00:56:07,198 --> 00:56:09,198 ♪ Faster than the devil ♪ 1105 00:56:09,281 --> 00:56:13,156 ♪ Run me straight into the ground ♪ 1106 00:56:13,240 --> 00:56:16,990 ♪ Drowning deep inside your water ♪ 1107 00:56:17,073 --> 00:56:21,824 ♪ Drown in love and memories ♪ 1108 00:56:21,907 --> 00:56:23,532 [exhales] 1109 00:56:23,615 --> 00:56:25,699 Um, how's your sister? 1110 00:56:25,782 --> 00:56:29,865 [straining] Ahh! Whoo! 1111 00:56:29,949 --> 00:56:32,490 Good. Why? 1112 00:56:33,281 --> 00:56:35,365 I don't know. 1113 00:56:35,448 --> 00:56:38,573 I kind of was thinking I might ask if she wanted 1114 00:56:38,657 --> 00:56:40,740 to grab dinner at Cesario's tonight. 1115 00:56:40,824 --> 00:56:42,907 You were? Really? 1116 00:56:42,990 --> 00:56:44,532 [whispering] I'd love to. 1117 00:56:44,615 --> 00:56:45,865 - What? - [clears throat] 1118 00:56:45,949 --> 00:56:48,031 I'd love to give her your phone number. 1119 00:56:48,115 --> 00:56:50,323 - Hastings! - [clears throat] 1120 00:56:50,407 --> 00:56:53,240 Yeah, coach? 1121 00:56:53,323 --> 00:56:55,573 You're first string for the Cornwall game. 1122 00:56:55,657 --> 00:56:57,073 - Really? - No. 1123 00:56:57,156 --> 00:57:01,949 I was joking, you idiot. 1124 00:57:02,031 --> 00:57:04,281 Dude, that's awesome. 1125 00:57:06,657 --> 00:57:10,031 - Mmm. - Um... um, dude. 1126 00:57:10,115 --> 00:57:12,532 [clears throat] 1127 00:57:12,615 --> 00:57:15,573 - So you want me to spot you? - No. 1128 00:57:15,657 --> 00:57:17,198 [sighs] Isn't he cute? 1129 00:57:17,281 --> 00:57:18,573 Duke? Yeah. 1130 00:57:18,657 --> 00:57:21,907 No. Sebastian. He's so cool. 1131 00:57:21,990 --> 00:57:25,407 [sighs] But he said I'm not his type. 1132 00:57:25,490 --> 00:57:28,115 - That's impossible. You're everyone's type. - Not his. 1133 00:57:28,198 --> 00:57:30,281 I could tell you what us mere mortals would do 1134 00:57:30,365 --> 00:57:32,115 in this situation. 1135 00:57:32,198 --> 00:57:34,657 - What? - Make him jealous. 1136 00:57:34,740 --> 00:57:37,824 So, what do you do? You just pretend to like somebody else? 1137 00:57:37,907 --> 00:57:41,281 Mm-hm. And then use him shamelessly. 1138 00:57:41,365 --> 00:57:42,657 Wow. 1139 00:57:42,740 --> 00:57:44,907 [grunts] 1140 00:57:44,990 --> 00:57:48,156 So you should call Viola up. 1141 00:57:48,240 --> 00:57:51,365 Yeah. I think I will. 1142 00:57:53,323 --> 00:57:54,407 Hey, Duke. 1143 00:57:54,490 --> 00:57:56,615 Sebastian. 1144 00:57:56,699 --> 00:57:57,782 Olivia. 1145 00:57:57,865 --> 00:57:59,240 Olivia. 1146 00:57:59,323 --> 00:58:01,615 What're you bench-pressing these days? 1147 00:58:01,699 --> 00:58:03,323 225. 1148 00:58:03,407 --> 00:58:04,907 Very impressive. 1149 00:58:04,990 --> 00:58:06,782 [laughs nervously] Thanks. 1150 00:58:06,865 --> 00:58:10,281 So, Duke, about that call that you were gonna make. 1151 00:58:10,365 --> 00:58:12,740 - You gonna make that? - Yeah. Thank you. 1152 00:58:12,824 --> 00:58:15,532 So how many reps can you do with that 225? 1153 00:58:15,615 --> 00:58:19,281 [scoffs] Like 20... 20. 1154 00:58:19,365 --> 00:58:22,198 225 is more than twice what I weigh. 1155 00:58:22,281 --> 00:58:24,615 How many reps could you do with me? 1156 00:58:26,031 --> 00:58:28,657 Forty. 1157 00:58:28,740 --> 00:58:31,573 - [cell phone rings] - [laughs] 1158 00:58:33,573 --> 00:58:34,657 Hello? 1159 00:58:34,740 --> 00:58:36,031 Hi, it's Viola. 1160 00:58:36,115 --> 00:58:39,115 Sebastian told me to call you. 1161 00:58:39,198 --> 00:58:40,323 I'd love to go to dinner. 1162 00:58:40,407 --> 00:58:42,365 Um, yeah. What? 1163 00:58:42,448 --> 00:58:45,198 Um... can I call you back? 1164 00:58:45,281 --> 00:58:48,115 Because I gotta... 1165 00:58:48,198 --> 00:58:50,615 [stammers] ...change my feet. 1166 00:58:50,699 --> 00:58:55,031 So, uh, do you have any plans tonight? 1167 00:58:55,115 --> 00:58:57,824 Oh! [chuckles] My bad. 1168 00:58:57,907 --> 00:58:59,532 What about the thing that we talked about 1169 00:58:59,615 --> 00:59:01,699 that you were going to do later? 1170 00:59:01,782 --> 00:59:03,490 What thing? I'm thingless. 1171 00:59:03,573 --> 00:59:07,198 Great! Then it's a date. Cesario's, 8:00. 1172 00:59:07,281 --> 00:59:10,699 - I'll see you there. - OK. 1173 00:59:10,782 --> 00:59:11,699 Bye, Sebastian. 1174 00:59:11,782 --> 00:59:13,115 Later. 1175 00:59:16,115 --> 00:59:18,699 Yeah! Mm! 1176 00:59:18,782 --> 00:59:19,990 You did it. 1177 00:59:20,073 --> 00:59:22,031 ♪ I'm goin' out with Olivia ♪ 1178 00:59:22,115 --> 00:59:24,865 What the hell?! I thought you liked Viola now! 1179 00:59:24,949 --> 00:59:27,990 Dude, come on. You're a guy. 1180 00:59:28,073 --> 00:59:29,156 What would you do 1181 00:59:29,240 --> 00:59:31,824 if the hottest girl in the school 1182 00:59:31,907 --> 00:59:36,573 came up to you and asked you on a date? 1183 00:59:36,657 --> 00:59:38,031 I'll be right back. 1184 00:59:38,115 --> 00:59:41,407 Olivia? Hi. Can I talk to you for a second? 1185 00:59:41,490 --> 00:59:43,865 Moi? Whatever for? 1186 00:59:43,949 --> 00:59:45,407 It's about your date with Duke. 1187 00:59:45,490 --> 00:59:47,740 Oh! I know! I am so glad I listened to you. 1188 00:59:47,824 --> 00:59:49,907 You're right. He's awesome. 1189 00:59:49,990 --> 00:59:55,281 And he looked so good in those shorts. Whoo! 1190 00:59:55,365 --> 00:59:58,281 He's not a piece of meat, Olivia. 1191 00:59:58,365 --> 01:00:01,240 He's a man. A man with feelings. 1192 01:00:01,323 --> 01:00:03,699 And I'm a woman with feelings. 1193 01:00:03,782 --> 01:00:06,907 And my feelings seem to match his. 1194 01:00:06,990 --> 01:00:09,365 You know what? 1195 01:00:09,448 --> 01:00:11,699 Speaking as a completely objective 1196 01:00:11,782 --> 01:00:13,240 third-party observer 1197 01:00:13,323 --> 01:00:16,073 with absolutely no personal interest in the matter, 1198 01:00:16,156 --> 01:00:19,782 I'm not so sure that you and Duke are a good idea after all. 1199 01:00:19,865 --> 01:00:21,782 Well, thank you for your concern. 1200 01:00:21,865 --> 01:00:23,573 And if you're so worried, 1201 01:00:23,657 --> 01:00:25,824 maybe you should come to Cesario's tonight, 1202 01:00:25,907 --> 01:00:28,240 just to keep an eye on me. 1203 01:00:28,323 --> 01:00:30,156 We could double. 1204 01:00:30,240 --> 01:00:33,448 I bet Eunice is available. 1205 01:00:33,532 --> 01:00:37,782 I'm so there, it's insane. [laughs] 1206 01:00:37,865 --> 01:00:40,365 [rock music] 1207 01:00:49,365 --> 01:00:53,532 So do you like... cheese? 1208 01:00:58,198 --> 01:01:00,407 Hey, you two, what's going on? 1209 01:01:00,490 --> 01:01:01,782 You're here... 1210 01:01:01,865 --> 01:01:04,115 ...with Eunice. 1211 01:01:04,198 --> 01:01:05,156 Mind if we join? 1212 01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:06,949 - No. Sit down. - No, no, no. 1213 01:01:07,031 --> 01:01:09,407 Lady pterodactyl. 1214 01:01:10,573 --> 01:01:12,740 [both] Waiter! 1215 01:01:13,865 --> 01:01:15,198 [mouthing] Help. 1216 01:01:18,448 --> 01:01:19,949 So... 1217 01:01:20,031 --> 01:01:22,448 ...I was just telling Duke how great it is 1218 01:01:22,532 --> 01:01:25,323 to meet a real man at this school. 1219 01:01:25,407 --> 01:01:27,323 Uh, you were? 1220 01:01:27,407 --> 01:01:29,657 Well, I was just about to. 1221 01:01:29,740 --> 01:01:32,031 Isn't it great to have a real man around, Eunice? 1222 01:01:32,115 --> 01:01:34,281 Oh, yes. 1223 01:01:34,365 --> 01:01:37,407 A real man is difficult to find. 1224 01:01:40,031 --> 01:01:41,532 So difficult. 1225 01:01:41,615 --> 01:01:44,031 Sebastian's with Eunice. 1226 01:01:44,115 --> 01:01:46,156 She must be hotter than I thought. 1227 01:01:46,240 --> 01:01:49,073 How come when I wanted to ask out Eunice everyone made fun of me? 1228 01:01:49,156 --> 01:01:51,365 Now Sebastian likes her, and suddenly she's cool? 1229 01:01:51,448 --> 01:01:53,448 Screw you guys. I hate high school. 1230 01:01:54,615 --> 01:01:57,657 Eunice! Hands! 1231 01:01:57,740 --> 01:01:59,532 You know what? This has been real fun, 1232 01:01:59,615 --> 01:02:02,240 but I have to go... 1233 01:02:02,323 --> 01:02:04,407 ...shave. 1234 01:02:04,490 --> 01:02:06,990 OK. 1235 01:02:08,407 --> 01:02:10,865 Well, this has been lovely. 1236 01:02:10,949 --> 01:02:12,365 Um, let's do it again sometime. 1237 01:02:12,448 --> 01:02:13,657 [scoffs] What? 1238 01:02:13,740 --> 01:02:16,115 Soon. Bye. 1239 01:02:17,782 --> 01:02:19,990 So, um... 1240 01:02:21,323 --> 01:02:23,407 ...do you like cheese? 1241 01:02:23,490 --> 01:02:28,115 [sighs] More than almost any other animal byproduct. 1242 01:02:28,198 --> 01:02:30,740 Yeah, check please. 1243 01:02:30,824 --> 01:02:32,407 Hey, Monique, it's Sebastian. 1244 01:02:32,490 --> 01:02:34,407 I don't know if Viola told you I'm in London, 1245 01:02:34,490 --> 01:02:37,031 but I'm heading home a day early. 1246 01:02:37,115 --> 01:02:39,699 Listen, I've been thinking, 1247 01:02:39,782 --> 01:02:43,240 and we really need to talk. 1248 01:02:43,323 --> 01:02:45,407 Ladies... 1249 01:02:45,490 --> 01:02:47,365 Ladies. 1250 01:02:48,323 --> 01:02:49,615 Welcome. 1251 01:02:49,699 --> 01:02:51,699 My name is Cheryl Lancaster. 1252 01:02:51,782 --> 01:02:53,907 I'm president of the Stratford Junior League 1253 01:02:53,990 --> 01:02:56,281 and coordinator of this year's debutante season. 1254 01:02:56,365 --> 01:02:58,740 - [applause] - Oh, please. 1255 01:02:58,824 --> 01:03:01,615 Thank you. Today we're gonna go over the guidelines 1256 01:03:01,699 --> 01:03:06,949 for a graceful, ladylike entrée into society. 1257 01:03:07,031 --> 01:03:08,073 [all gasping] 1258 01:03:08,156 --> 01:03:11,990 Son of a... 1259 01:03:12,073 --> 01:03:13,407 Hello. 1260 01:03:13,490 --> 01:03:16,198 Hello there. 1261 01:03:17,865 --> 01:03:20,573 - [crashing] - [clears throat] 1262 01:03:20,657 --> 01:03:22,573 - Hi. - Make sure she's in the back 1263 01:03:22,657 --> 01:03:23,782 for the group photo. 1264 01:03:23,865 --> 01:03:27,073 Thank you for joining us, Viola. 1265 01:03:27,156 --> 01:03:30,240 Now, who's ready to come out? 1266 01:03:30,323 --> 01:03:31,323 Kill me. 1267 01:03:31,407 --> 01:03:34,031 [girls giggling] 1268 01:03:35,490 --> 01:03:38,073 [munching] 1269 01:03:44,073 --> 01:03:45,573 [sighs] 1270 01:03:45,657 --> 01:03:48,240 [slurping, munching] 1271 01:03:49,740 --> 01:03:52,490 - Viola? Darling. - Huh? 1272 01:03:52,573 --> 01:03:56,907 Remember, chew like you have a secret. 1273 01:04:01,907 --> 01:04:04,115 [slurping] 1274 01:04:04,198 --> 01:04:06,907 Excuse me. 1275 01:04:08,907 --> 01:04:11,198 Ladies. 1276 01:04:23,240 --> 01:04:24,281 Hi 1277 01:04:24,365 --> 01:04:25,824 Hey. 1278 01:04:25,907 --> 01:04:27,490 Hey! You're the one that saved me 1279 01:04:27,573 --> 01:04:29,323 in the kissing booth that one time, right? 1280 01:04:29,407 --> 01:04:32,156 - Oh. Hi. - Hi. 1281 01:04:32,240 --> 01:04:35,240 Oh, what a small world. I'm Viola. 1282 01:04:35,323 --> 01:04:36,532 Olivia. 1283 01:04:36,615 --> 01:04:39,115 - Nice to meet you. - You too. 1284 01:04:42,615 --> 01:04:44,699 So... Oh. 1285 01:04:44,782 --> 01:04:46,407 I know it's none of my business, 1286 01:04:46,490 --> 01:04:49,073 but you went out with that Duke Orsino guy, right? 1287 01:04:49,156 --> 01:04:52,532 - Yeah. Once. - [laughs] 1288 01:04:52,615 --> 01:04:54,990 - Did you kiss him? - No, why? 1289 01:04:55,073 --> 01:04:58,532 Oh, no. It's nothing, but... Echh. 1290 01:04:58,615 --> 01:05:01,198 Just try to postpone it as long as possible. 1291 01:05:01,281 --> 01:05:05,031 He has this, uh, salivary gland condition. 1292 01:05:05,115 --> 01:05:09,198 Yeah. He doesn't really like to talk about it, 1293 01:05:09,281 --> 01:05:11,740 but it felt like I was drowning. [gagging] 1294 01:05:11,824 --> 01:05:14,073 - Really? - Mm. 1295 01:05:14,156 --> 01:05:17,448 - Oh, my God, ew. - I know. It was repulsive. 1296 01:05:17,532 --> 01:05:20,573 But, hey, every happiness to you both. 1297 01:05:20,657 --> 01:05:25,031 Uh... No, um, actually, I don't really like Duke. 1298 01:05:25,115 --> 01:05:29,949 Um, I have this huge thing for his roommate, Sebastian. 1299 01:05:30,031 --> 01:05:34,323 And I was just trying to make Sebastian jealous. 1300 01:05:37,615 --> 01:05:38,990 [sighs] 1301 01:05:41,448 --> 01:05:43,281 Oh, boy. 1302 01:05:43,365 --> 01:05:46,115 Yeah, I know it's really wrong to use a person this way, 1303 01:05:46,198 --> 01:05:49,281 and I feel really terrible about it. 1304 01:05:49,365 --> 01:05:51,240 But I really, really like Sebastian. 1305 01:05:51,323 --> 01:05:53,281 [sighs] He's so handsome. 1306 01:05:53,365 --> 01:05:56,073 He's not the goonish handsome you see in a lot of guys. 1307 01:05:56,156 --> 01:06:00,323 He's a delicate, like, even refined handsome, you know? 1308 01:06:00,407 --> 01:06:06,073 Oh, and when he smiles, I just can't stop looking at him. 1309 01:06:06,156 --> 01:06:08,907 He's just so wonderful. 1310 01:06:08,990 --> 01:06:11,448 You know, Olivia... [laughs] 1311 01:06:11,532 --> 01:06:13,115 - It's Olivia, right? - Yeah. 1312 01:06:13,198 --> 01:06:16,782 I'm gonna give you just a little advice. 1313 01:06:16,865 --> 01:06:18,573 - OK. - Enough is enough! 1314 01:06:18,657 --> 01:06:22,782 You are weaving a really tangled web. 1315 01:06:22,865 --> 01:06:24,448 Yeah, like really, really tangled. 1316 01:06:24,532 --> 01:06:27,782 And, um, honey... [laughs] ...you got to stop! 1317 01:06:27,865 --> 01:06:30,990 OK? So you just gotta tell everybody the truth. 1318 01:06:31,073 --> 01:06:32,448 Be very, very honest. 1319 01:06:32,532 --> 01:06:35,365 Just let the chips fall where they may. 1320 01:06:35,448 --> 01:06:37,448 - You're right. - I know. 1321 01:06:37,532 --> 01:06:40,115 The next time I see Sebastian I'll march right up to him. 1322 01:06:40,198 --> 01:06:42,365 - You march! - And I'll tell him how I feel. 1323 01:06:42,448 --> 01:06:43,657 You tell him. 1324 01:06:43,740 --> 01:06:45,699 Then I'll kiss him so passionately... 1325 01:06:45,782 --> 01:06:48,824 - What? - ...that even the people he hates will feel pleasure. 1326 01:06:48,907 --> 01:06:49,949 - [laughs] - [banging] 1327 01:06:50,031 --> 01:06:51,323 [both gasp] 1328 01:06:51,407 --> 01:06:52,865 Hello, Viola. 1329 01:06:52,949 --> 01:06:54,490 Oh, this is not good. 1330 01:06:54,573 --> 01:06:57,657 And hello to you, you little homewrecker. 1331 01:06:57,740 --> 01:06:59,156 Uh, who are you? 1332 01:06:59,240 --> 01:07:01,532 I am Sebastian's girlfriend. 1333 01:07:01,615 --> 01:07:03,156 Ex-girlfriend. 1334 01:07:03,240 --> 01:07:05,448 OK, everybody's got to stop saying that. 1335 01:07:05,532 --> 01:07:08,532 Oh, you were the one he dumped in the pizza parlor the other day. 1336 01:07:08,615 --> 01:07:11,323 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. He did not dump me. 1337 01:07:11,407 --> 01:07:14,198 We're just going through a little bit of a rough patch. 1338 01:07:14,281 --> 01:07:17,532 Oh. I heard he dumped you. He dumped you big. 1339 01:07:17,615 --> 01:07:21,365 It was just like a big, huge dumping. 1340 01:07:21,448 --> 01:07:23,198 [both laughing] 1341 01:07:23,281 --> 01:07:26,532 [gasps, screaming] 1342 01:07:26,615 --> 01:07:28,490 Ahh! 1343 01:07:28,573 --> 01:07:30,824 Are you crazy?! Are you OK? 1344 01:07:30,907 --> 01:07:32,740 Get out! 1345 01:07:34,323 --> 01:07:37,699 You are messing with the wrong man! 1346 01:07:37,782 --> 01:07:40,281 [both screaming] 1347 01:07:42,907 --> 01:07:46,407 Get off me! Get off of me! 1348 01:07:46,490 --> 01:07:48,699 Oww! 1349 01:07:48,782 --> 01:07:51,073 Ahhh! 1350 01:07:54,156 --> 01:07:55,615 Oh! 1351 01:08:00,156 --> 01:08:02,323 Whoa! Whoa! 1352 01:08:04,156 --> 01:08:07,573 - [screaming continues] - [all gasping] 1353 01:08:07,657 --> 01:08:10,281 - [screaming] - [glass breaking] 1354 01:08:12,865 --> 01:08:14,365 - Get off of her! - Let go of me! 1355 01:08:14,448 --> 01:08:17,699 Ladies! Ladies, stop! 1356 01:08:17,782 --> 01:08:19,782 Please! 1357 01:08:22,532 --> 01:08:27,532 When debutantes disagree they say it with their eyes. 1358 01:08:29,031 --> 01:08:30,699 Well, Hastings. 1359 01:08:30,782 --> 01:08:34,407 Why is it that I always find you in the middle of a tussle? 1360 01:08:34,490 --> 01:08:37,782 Bad timing? 1361 01:08:37,865 --> 01:08:39,573 I am convinced he's hiding something. 1362 01:08:39,657 --> 01:08:43,824 Oh, nonsense, Malcolm. He may be a little lost and confused, 1363 01:08:43,907 --> 01:08:48,073 but deep down he's an all-American, red-blooded male. 1364 01:08:48,156 --> 01:08:50,281 - Just like yourself. - [Viola] Mom, I will pick out 1365 01:08:50,365 --> 01:08:53,156 my own dress. And no, I will not wear heels. 1366 01:08:53,240 --> 01:08:55,782 Because heels are a male invention 1367 01:08:55,865 --> 01:08:59,240 designed to make a woman's butt look smaller. 1368 01:08:59,323 --> 01:09:02,490 And to make it harder for them to run away. 1369 01:09:07,532 --> 01:09:11,740 Malcolm, have you ever tried to run away in high heels? 1370 01:09:11,824 --> 01:09:14,907 - No, sir, I wouldn't... - Not that easy. Not that easy. 1371 01:09:14,990 --> 01:09:16,824 [engine revving] 1372 01:09:16,907 --> 01:09:19,323 [romantic pop music] 1373 01:09:21,407 --> 01:09:26,532 ♪ Such a silly game we play, ohh ♪ 1374 01:09:26,615 --> 01:09:28,615 Don't forget your guitar, Mr. Hastings. 1375 01:09:28,699 --> 01:09:33,532 [sighs] Just do it. Just close your eyes and kiss him. 1376 01:09:39,365 --> 01:09:41,573 Sebastian. 1377 01:09:45,532 --> 01:09:47,990 "Wake up. I've been waiting for you to open your eyes 1378 01:09:48,073 --> 01:09:49,782 so I can tell you that I think I'm ready. 1379 01:09:49,865 --> 01:09:52,615 I'm ready to free-fall into the unknown." 1380 01:09:52,699 --> 01:09:55,699 I'll see you at the game tomorrow. 1381 01:10:00,699 --> 01:10:03,657 I think I'm gonna like this school. 1382 01:10:08,907 --> 01:10:10,532 [answering machine beeps] 1383 01:10:10,615 --> 01:10:12,573 [Sebastian] Monique, it's Sebastian. 1384 01:10:12,657 --> 01:10:14,532 I don't know if Viola told you I'm in London, 1385 01:10:14,615 --> 01:10:17,031 but I'm heading home a day early. 1386 01:10:17,115 --> 01:10:20,657 Listen, I've been thinking. We really need to talk. 1387 01:10:20,740 --> 01:10:23,865 - [answering machine beeps] - London? 1388 01:10:23,949 --> 01:10:26,865 Ooh! 1389 01:10:26,949 --> 01:10:29,990 Hey, brother. Dinklage was looking for you, man. 1390 01:10:30,073 --> 01:10:35,240 Dude. Hello! 1391 01:10:35,323 --> 01:10:38,323 You know, it's, um, crazy 1392 01:10:38,407 --> 01:10:41,198 how wrong you can be about a person. 1393 01:10:41,281 --> 01:10:44,699 Huh, it's crazy. 1394 01:10:44,782 --> 01:10:46,865 You know, you think that they're one thing, 1395 01:10:46,949 --> 01:10:50,740 and then they turn out to be the exact opposite. 1396 01:10:50,824 --> 01:10:53,573 - What are you talking about? - You're gonna sit there 1397 01:10:53,657 --> 01:10:56,615 and act like you don't know what I'm talking about? 1398 01:10:59,657 --> 01:11:01,448 OK. 1399 01:11:01,532 --> 01:11:04,490 All right. OK. 1400 01:11:06,281 --> 01:11:08,782 I wanted to tell you, Duke, but... 1401 01:11:08,865 --> 01:11:10,907 ...you have to know... 1402 01:11:10,990 --> 01:11:14,115 ...I love soccer more than anything else in the world, 1403 01:11:14,198 --> 01:11:15,615 and I had a point to prove. 1404 01:11:15,699 --> 01:11:18,407 What?! So you're telling me that you used me 1405 01:11:18,490 --> 01:11:19,865 to help you with soccer, 1406 01:11:19,949 --> 01:11:22,073 and then you turn around and stab me in the back? 1407 01:11:22,156 --> 01:11:25,615 Wait, what? Now I really don't know what you're talking about. 1408 01:11:25,699 --> 01:11:27,907 Save it, man. I saw you with her. 1409 01:11:27,990 --> 01:11:30,907 - With who?! - Who?! Olivia, that's who! 1410 01:11:30,990 --> 01:11:32,615 You kissed her when you got out the cab! 1411 01:11:32,699 --> 01:11:35,073 - What cab?! - We were supposed to be friends! 1412 01:11:35,156 --> 01:11:37,782 - We are friends! - You don't know the meaning of the word! 1413 01:11:37,865 --> 01:11:40,281 Olivia never liked you, OK?! 1414 01:11:40,365 --> 01:11:43,115 She was just using you to make me jealous. 1415 01:11:43,198 --> 01:11:45,281 But Viola, she's crazy about you. 1416 01:11:45,365 --> 01:11:47,782 She has been since the first moment that you kissed her. 1417 01:11:47,865 --> 01:11:51,323 I bet that's part of your plan. Distract me so you can move in next to Olivia. 1418 01:11:51,407 --> 01:11:55,824 - That is not what happened! - You... you and your sister have a good life! 1419 01:11:59,198 --> 01:12:02,949 [Malcolm] "The Hastings twins couldn't be more opposite." 1420 01:12:03,031 --> 01:12:05,115 - Twins? - Sebastian? 1421 01:12:05,198 --> 01:12:07,907 - Sebastian? - [banging on door] 1422 01:12:08,031 --> 01:12:09,824 Sebastian, open up! 1423 01:12:09,907 --> 01:12:12,699 It's Monique! You have got a lot of explaining to do, 1424 01:12:12,782 --> 01:12:15,365 followed by a very long night of groveling! 1425 01:12:15,448 --> 01:12:19,115 - He's not here! - Uhh. 1426 01:12:19,198 --> 01:12:20,615 [gasps] 1427 01:12:20,699 --> 01:12:21,990 Take his stupid cell phone. 1428 01:12:22,073 --> 01:12:25,532 Justine calls every 10 seconds. 1429 01:12:25,615 --> 01:12:30,615 [gasps] This isn't Sebastian's phone. 1430 01:12:30,699 --> 01:12:33,532 God! Sebastian! 1431 01:12:33,615 --> 01:12:36,323 - Sebastian! Ew! Ew! - Can I help you? 1432 01:12:36,407 --> 01:12:39,490 - [cell phone rings] - [laughs] 1433 01:12:39,573 --> 01:12:41,657 - Hello? - [Justin] Viola. Hey, baby. 1434 01:12:41,740 --> 01:12:44,323 It's Justin. You know, the big game is tomorrow and... 1435 01:12:44,407 --> 01:12:46,657 Viola. 1436 01:12:46,740 --> 01:12:49,323 Allow me to introduce myself. 1437 01:12:49,407 --> 01:12:53,532 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007... 1438 01:12:53,615 --> 01:12:57,156 Nice night. ...2008. 1439 01:12:57,240 --> 01:12:59,615 Hey, Eunice. 1440 01:13:01,281 --> 01:13:03,198 Sorry about running out on our date. 1441 01:13:03,281 --> 01:13:07,907 Oh, that's OK. My intensity scares some people. 1442 01:13:07,990 --> 01:13:10,198 Yeah. 1443 01:13:10,281 --> 01:13:12,490 Is something wrong? 1444 01:13:12,573 --> 01:13:15,365 Got thrown out of my room. 1445 01:13:15,448 --> 01:13:19,198 You mean... you need a place to sleep? 1446 01:13:19,281 --> 01:13:23,532 I really do. I mean, the Cornwall game is tomorrow. 1447 01:13:23,615 --> 01:13:26,782 I've never had a roommate before. 1448 01:13:30,907 --> 01:13:34,031 [door opens] 1449 01:13:37,824 --> 01:13:41,573 Wow. Vi, you set up all my stuff. 1450 01:13:41,657 --> 01:13:44,407 Thanks. 1451 01:13:44,490 --> 01:13:46,990 [♪ Flipsyde: Spun] 1452 01:13:52,490 --> 01:13:54,615 - [alarm ringing] - ♪ Hey, hey ♪ 1453 01:13:54,699 --> 01:13:57,448 ♪ See we gotta get it right but we always get it wrong ♪ 1454 01:13:57,532 --> 01:14:00,281 ♪ And it be the same old thing and it be the same old song ♪ 1455 01:14:00,365 --> 01:14:02,907 ♪ Tryin' to fight to survive Tryin' to fight for our lives ♪ 1456 01:14:02,990 --> 01:14:05,573 ♪ See I'm only tryin' to live I don't wanna say goodbye ♪ 1457 01:14:05,657 --> 01:14:07,699 And you're absolutely certain about this? 1458 01:14:07,782 --> 01:14:10,949 [both] Yes, sir, we are. 1459 01:14:11,031 --> 01:14:12,573 Dude, what are you doing?! 1460 01:14:12,657 --> 01:14:14,615 Sebastian, the game's about to start! 1461 01:14:14,699 --> 01:14:17,990 Get out of bed and get over to the soccer field, man! 1462 01:14:19,323 --> 01:14:22,281 The soccer game? 1463 01:14:22,365 --> 01:14:24,657 That's what that girl was talking about. 1464 01:14:26,532 --> 01:14:29,740 Sebastian! You're next. Hurry up. 1465 01:14:29,824 --> 01:14:32,198 [girl] Come over here, and I'll do you. 1466 01:14:36,365 --> 01:14:39,156 OK, ladies, listen up. 1467 01:14:39,240 --> 01:14:40,699 Where's Hastings? 1468 01:14:45,323 --> 01:14:47,115 [yells] 1469 01:14:47,198 --> 01:14:48,615 [high voice] Euni... 1470 01:14:48,699 --> 01:14:50,782 [deep voice] Eunice! Why didn't you wake me?! 1471 01:14:50,865 --> 01:14:53,532 You looked so serene. 1472 01:14:54,740 --> 01:14:57,365 I made breakfast, darling. 1473 01:14:59,073 --> 01:15:02,365 [marching band plays] 1474 01:15:05,907 --> 01:15:08,115 [man clears throat] Pardon me. Pardon me. 1475 01:15:14,073 --> 01:15:15,990 What is the big emergency? 1476 01:15:16,073 --> 01:15:18,156 I canceled my squash game for this. 1477 01:15:18,240 --> 01:15:20,782 I don't know. All that Principal Gold said 1478 01:15:20,865 --> 01:15:24,615 was that we were needed at Sebastian's soccer game. 1479 01:15:28,907 --> 01:15:31,990 Hasn't Viola said anything to you the past couple of weeks? 1480 01:15:32,073 --> 01:15:34,323 How should I know? 1481 01:15:34,407 --> 01:15:37,615 She's been living with you. 1482 01:15:38,657 --> 01:15:41,865 Hasn't she? 1483 01:15:41,949 --> 01:15:45,990 - Excuse me. - This is so exciting, guys. 1484 01:15:46,073 --> 01:15:47,448 [crowd cheering] 1485 01:15:49,448 --> 01:15:52,073 [rock music plays] 1486 01:16:07,782 --> 01:16:09,740 [announcer] Welcome, ladies and gentlemen. 1487 01:16:09,824 --> 01:16:12,323 Today, the biggest rivalry in our district is afoot. 1488 01:16:12,407 --> 01:16:14,365 Illyria versus Cornwall. 1489 01:16:14,448 --> 01:16:17,573 It's gonna be something else, and the atmosphere is crazy! 1490 01:16:18,699 --> 01:16:20,448 [man] Afternoon, gentlemen. 1491 01:16:23,490 --> 01:16:25,490 Handshake, please. 1492 01:16:29,824 --> 01:16:31,990 All right, your call. 1493 01:16:32,990 --> 01:16:34,699 Heads. 1494 01:16:36,031 --> 01:16:37,073 Heads it is. 1495 01:16:37,156 --> 01:16:39,073 We'll stay as we are. 1496 01:16:39,156 --> 01:16:41,782 Good game, gentlemen. 1497 01:16:41,865 --> 01:16:44,156 How's your jaw? 1498 01:16:51,323 --> 01:16:53,615 All right, let's get it on! 1499 01:16:53,699 --> 01:16:55,448 [Toby] Way to go, boys. 1500 01:16:55,532 --> 01:16:57,240 Listen to me. We can do this. Today is the day 1501 01:16:57,323 --> 01:16:59,240 - Cornwall beats Illyria. - [all] Yeah! 1502 01:16:59,323 --> 01:17:01,657 I ain't got much to say to you. 1503 01:17:01,740 --> 01:17:04,824 - Except for, who's gonna bring that blood and pain?! - [all] Black and red! 1504 01:17:04,907 --> 01:17:07,407 - This ain't gonna be no game. This is a war! - [all] Yeah! 1505 01:17:07,490 --> 01:17:09,782 Who's gonna bring that blood and pain?! 1506 01:17:09,865 --> 01:17:13,740 - One, two, three! - [all] Cornwall! 1507 01:17:13,824 --> 01:17:15,407 [all yelling] Whoo! 1508 01:17:15,490 --> 01:17:18,615 [♪ All-American Rejects: Dirty Little Secret] 1509 01:17:18,699 --> 01:17:20,949 All right, boys, here we go! 1510 01:17:21,031 --> 01:17:22,573 [whistle blowing] 1511 01:17:27,198 --> 01:17:29,740 ♪ Let me know that I've done wrong ♪ 1512 01:17:29,824 --> 01:17:34,240 Hastings! Pass it off! Pass it off! Hastings! 1513 01:17:34,323 --> 01:17:36,407 What in the hell is going on?! 1514 01:17:36,490 --> 01:17:38,532 Nice move, moron. 1515 01:17:41,573 --> 01:17:43,615 What? 1516 01:17:43,699 --> 01:17:46,073 This can't be happening. 1517 01:17:56,115 --> 01:17:58,657 Sebastian? 1518 01:17:58,740 --> 01:18:04,156 ♪ Don't tell anyone, or you'll be just another regret ♪ 1519 01:18:04,240 --> 01:18:06,323 Get the ball! Get the ball! 1520 01:18:06,407 --> 01:18:08,323 Get up and get back in there! Get the ball! 1521 01:18:08,407 --> 01:18:10,156 Oh, my God, this is my game! 1522 01:18:10,240 --> 01:18:12,365 What the hell am I doing here? This isn't fun. 1523 01:18:12,448 --> 01:18:14,156 Christ! You look like Bambi on ice, boy! 1524 01:18:14,240 --> 01:18:16,115 Sebastian! 1525 01:18:17,448 --> 01:18:18,532 Sebastian! 1526 01:18:18,615 --> 01:18:21,490 [yelling] 1527 01:18:21,573 --> 01:18:24,532 - [whistle blows] - Can I get a timeout, please? 1528 01:18:24,615 --> 01:18:27,699 A pause? One brief halftime? 1529 01:18:27,782 --> 01:18:30,323 - Stopping the clock. - That's it. Stop the clock. 1530 01:18:30,407 --> 01:18:32,031 - [whistle blows] - What the...? 1531 01:18:32,115 --> 01:18:34,198 [Gold] I don't know the technical lingo. 1532 01:18:34,281 --> 01:18:37,031 Armadillos. Fighting Armadillos, please. 1533 01:18:37,115 --> 01:18:38,865 I need... Gather around. 1534 01:18:38,949 --> 01:18:41,198 I played soccer once as a young man. Or was it chess? 1535 01:18:41,281 --> 01:18:43,532 Is there a problem, principal? 1536 01:18:43,615 --> 01:18:45,365 Yes. Unfortunately there is. 1537 01:18:45,448 --> 01:18:46,865 But I think it's only right 1538 01:18:46,949 --> 01:18:50,490 that Sebastian Hastings tell you himself. 1539 01:18:50,573 --> 01:18:54,156 Sebastian? Son? Or... 1540 01:18:54,240 --> 01:18:56,573 Do you have anything you'd like to say? 1541 01:18:56,657 --> 01:18:59,365 Ahhh... 1542 01:18:59,448 --> 01:19:02,699 I'm sorry I'm not a very good soccer player. 1543 01:19:02,782 --> 01:19:06,031 [sighs] I see. 1544 01:19:06,115 --> 01:19:10,198 Well then, please know that what I say... 1545 01:19:10,281 --> 01:19:12,949 ...I say with a heavy heart. 1546 01:19:16,990 --> 01:19:19,573 Ladies and gentlemen, esteemed alumni, 1547 01:19:19,657 --> 01:19:21,949 friends and family of Sebastian Hastings, 1548 01:19:22,031 --> 01:19:24,073 I am grievously sad... 1549 01:19:24,156 --> 01:19:27,907 - Uh-oh. - ...to inform you that Sebastian Hastings 1550 01:19:27,990 --> 01:19:31,532 - is... a girl. - [all laughing] 1551 01:19:31,615 --> 01:19:34,740 [Gold] I'm sorry, it's for your own good. You'll thank me for it someday. 1552 01:19:34,824 --> 01:19:36,031 Oh, OK. Certainly. Yes. 1553 01:19:36,115 --> 01:19:40,073 Excuse me. I'm not a girl. 1554 01:19:40,156 --> 01:19:41,573 Hello! Yes. 1555 01:19:41,657 --> 01:19:43,532 In fact, yes, he is. He's a big girl. 1556 01:19:43,615 --> 01:19:46,365 He's actually specifically his own sister, Viola, 1557 01:19:46,448 --> 01:19:48,281 who's been impersonating him 1558 01:19:48,365 --> 01:19:50,657 for reasons which will become very clear 1559 01:19:50,740 --> 01:19:52,573 after extensive psychoanalysis. 1560 01:19:52,657 --> 01:19:55,281 Folks. 1561 01:19:55,365 --> 01:19:58,240 I'm a boy. I promise. 1562 01:19:58,323 --> 01:20:02,073 - Prove it. - OK. 1563 01:20:02,156 --> 01:20:04,490 - [crowd whistling] - [boy] Oh! 1564 01:20:04,573 --> 01:20:05,740 God! I saw it. 1565 01:20:05,824 --> 01:20:07,949 Nice work, Paul. Wow. 1566 01:20:08,031 --> 01:20:10,115 That's my boy. 1567 01:20:10,198 --> 01:20:11,573 [man] Kevin, close your eyes. 1568 01:20:11,657 --> 01:20:14,115 Soccer is the world's favorite sport. 1569 01:20:14,198 --> 01:20:15,949 Thank you. Thank you. 1570 01:20:16,031 --> 01:20:18,573 Nothing to see here. No offense. 1571 01:20:18,657 --> 01:20:21,573 Folks, please, hang on for one second. 1572 01:20:21,657 --> 01:20:24,949 Just talk amongst yourselves for a second. 1573 01:20:25,031 --> 01:20:27,490 - Malcolm! - [feedback] 1574 01:20:27,573 --> 01:20:33,281 Can you shed some light on the current situation? 1575 01:20:33,365 --> 01:20:36,865 Not any more than has already been shed, sir. 1576 01:20:36,949 --> 01:20:39,657 OK, lads, listen up now. 1577 01:20:39,740 --> 01:20:42,990 Now that we've established this boy... 1578 01:20:43,073 --> 01:20:45,031 ...is a boy... 1579 01:20:45,115 --> 01:20:47,115 ...is it possible we can get back to our game? 1580 01:20:47,198 --> 01:20:49,323 [laughing] 1581 01:20:49,407 --> 01:20:53,115 Yes. Oh! Um, enjoy. That was a skit we... 1582 01:20:53,198 --> 01:20:54,615 OK. Yes. 1583 01:20:54,699 --> 01:20:56,365 Let's get to it, guys. Come on. 1584 01:20:56,448 --> 01:20:59,156 - [boy 1] I know, let's play. - [boy 2] Waste of time. 1585 01:20:59,240 --> 01:21:04,156 Baby. Baby, baby, baby. I have missed you so much. 1586 01:21:04,240 --> 01:21:06,115 Oh, my God, we are both so dead. 1587 01:21:06,198 --> 01:21:10,615 We're over, Monique. Done. 1588 01:21:11,490 --> 01:21:14,907 God! Not again! 1589 01:21:15,657 --> 01:21:17,573 Yah! 1590 01:21:19,782 --> 01:21:21,990 Good work, Hastings. 1591 01:21:22,073 --> 01:21:23,824 Bench. 1592 01:21:23,907 --> 01:21:26,740 - [whistle blows] - [punk music plays] 1593 01:21:36,990 --> 01:21:38,365 - Good one! - [crowd roars] 1594 01:21:38,448 --> 01:21:41,031 [whistle blowing] 1595 01:21:41,115 --> 01:21:42,782 Halftime, gentlemen. 1596 01:21:46,990 --> 01:21:49,240 [dance music plays] 1597 01:22:03,448 --> 01:22:05,073 , Sebastian! 1598 01:22:05,156 --> 01:22:06,907 - Vi? - Yes. 1599 01:22:06,990 --> 01:22:08,407 Why do you look like me?! 1600 01:22:08,490 --> 01:22:10,573 I pretended to be you the last two weeks 1601 01:22:10,657 --> 01:22:13,281 so I could prove I could play in the boys soccer team. 1602 01:22:13,365 --> 01:22:15,615 - Yes. - OK. OK, cool. 1603 01:22:15,699 --> 01:22:19,365 - No, wait! What?! - I don't have time to explain! Why are you wearing my uniform? 1604 01:22:19,448 --> 01:22:24,073 - I came to find the amazing girl that kissed me last night. - Who kissed you? What girl? 1605 01:22:24,156 --> 01:22:26,198 Check it out. That one. 1606 01:22:26,281 --> 01:22:28,031 Olivia? 1607 01:22:28,115 --> 01:22:31,240 She was all over me. She kissed me and then recited my own lyrics. 1608 01:22:31,323 --> 01:22:33,699 Vi, this may be the girl of my dreams. 1609 01:22:33,782 --> 01:22:35,949 That's the kiss that Duke saw. 1610 01:22:36,031 --> 01:22:36,990 Wait, are those real? 1611 01:22:37,073 --> 01:22:38,615 Yeah. I'm growing sideburns now. 1612 01:22:38,699 --> 01:22:40,907 No! Please stay hidden until the end of the game. 1613 01:22:40,990 --> 01:22:43,949 And give me my uniform back right now! 1614 01:22:44,031 --> 01:22:45,865 [crowd cheering] 1615 01:22:50,532 --> 01:22:53,115 [announcer] We start the second half. 1616 01:22:53,198 --> 01:22:54,907 Illyria, zero, Cornwall, zero. 1617 01:22:54,990 --> 01:22:56,990 Nothing but a couple of goose eggs. 1618 01:22:57,073 --> 01:22:58,949 Coach, I'm ready to play. 1619 01:22:59,031 --> 01:23:00,740 Is that what you call it? 1620 01:23:00,824 --> 01:23:03,448 I've seen little girls in tutus kick the ball better. 1621 01:23:03,532 --> 01:23:05,281 I've changed. 1622 01:23:05,365 --> 01:23:07,990 Come on, coach, give me one more chance. 1623 01:23:08,073 --> 01:23:09,740 All right. Go. 1624 01:23:09,824 --> 01:23:11,281 Kick. Kill! 1625 01:23:11,365 --> 01:23:13,949 [whistle blows] 1626 01:23:14,031 --> 01:23:17,407 [♪ OK Go: Invincible] 1627 01:23:24,573 --> 01:23:28,907 - Yeah! Now That's Viola! - Oww! 1628 01:23:32,073 --> 01:23:34,490 ♪ Oh, oh, oh Invincible ♪ 1629 01:23:34,573 --> 01:23:36,824 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1630 01:23:36,907 --> 01:23:38,323 ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪ 1631 01:23:38,407 --> 01:23:41,865 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1632 01:23:41,949 --> 01:23:43,990 You couldn't score on me in the first half. 1633 01:23:44,073 --> 01:23:47,490 You ain't going to score on me this half, baby! I'm ninja! Ninja goalie! 1634 01:23:47,573 --> 01:23:51,699 ♪ Oh, invincible Invincible, oh ♪ 1635 01:23:51,782 --> 01:23:53,865 ♪ Invincible You're invincible ♪ 1636 01:23:53,949 --> 01:23:58,990 ♪ Na, na, na-na-na-na Nah, nah, na-na-na-na ♪ 1637 01:23:59,073 --> 01:24:00,699 Come on guys! 1638 01:24:00,782 --> 01:24:03,907 ♪ Na, na, na-na-na-na Nah, nah, na-na-na-na ♪ 1639 01:24:03,990 --> 01:24:05,198 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1640 01:24:05,281 --> 01:24:06,907 ♪ That crushing, crashing ♪ 1641 01:24:06,990 --> 01:24:09,865 ♪ Atom-smashing white-hot thing ♪ 1642 01:24:09,949 --> 01:24:12,949 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1643 01:24:17,281 --> 01:24:20,532 ♪ You're invincible Invincible ♪ 1644 01:24:20,615 --> 01:24:23,031 [all cheering] 1645 01:24:23,115 --> 01:24:28,198 ♪ Na, na, na-na-na-na Nah, nah, na-na-na-na ♪ 1646 01:24:28,281 --> 01:24:29,573 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1647 01:24:29,657 --> 01:24:31,323 ♪ That crushing, crashing ♪ 1648 01:24:31,407 --> 01:24:33,323 ♪ Atom-smashing white-hot thing ♪ 1649 01:24:33,407 --> 01:24:34,490 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1650 01:24:34,573 --> 01:24:35,573 ♪ Invincible ♪ 1651 01:24:35,657 --> 01:24:39,782 [chattering] 1652 01:24:39,865 --> 01:24:42,907 [Viola as Sebastian] Duke! Duke! I'm open! 1653 01:24:42,990 --> 01:24:46,907 Give me the ball! Duke! Hey, over here! 1654 01:24:46,990 --> 01:24:49,907 I'm open! 1655 01:24:49,990 --> 01:24:54,031 Duke! Get back! Get back! 1656 01:24:57,782 --> 01:24:59,740 - [whistle blows] - No! 1657 01:24:59,824 --> 01:25:02,699 - Yes, Dan-O, way to go, baby! - [cheering] 1658 01:25:02,782 --> 01:25:05,323 Whoo! 1659 01:25:07,657 --> 01:25:09,949 And Cornwall's right back in it with a goal. 1660 01:25:11,281 --> 01:25:14,198 Whoo-hoo! 1661 01:25:14,281 --> 01:25:15,782 [whistle blows] 1662 01:25:18,990 --> 01:25:20,907 What's the matter?! Sebastian was open! 1663 01:25:21,031 --> 01:25:22,824 Rather lose the goal than let him score?! 1664 01:25:22,907 --> 01:25:24,115 Shut up, man. 1665 01:25:24,198 --> 01:25:26,281 Duke, I know you're mad at me. 1666 01:25:26,365 --> 01:25:28,407 - Don't talk to me. - I didn't do what you... 1667 01:25:28,490 --> 01:25:31,240 - Get out of my face! - Nothing is going on with me and Olivia! 1668 01:25:31,323 --> 01:25:33,615 When the game is over I'll explain! 1669 01:25:33,699 --> 01:25:36,990 But for right now, you don't have to like me, but I'm your teammate, OK?! 1670 01:25:37,073 --> 01:25:39,448 And I want to beat these guys! I have to beat these guys! 1671 01:25:39,532 --> 01:25:43,281 If we're not disturbing you, we have a soccer game we'd like to finish. 1672 01:25:43,365 --> 01:25:44,949 Get back in the net, man. 1673 01:25:45,031 --> 01:25:47,281 Or what? You'll hit my fist with your face again? 1674 01:25:47,365 --> 01:25:49,448 Do you want to see me do it? Come on, let's go! 1675 01:25:49,532 --> 01:25:50,782 Duke, come on. Stop it. 1676 01:25:50,865 --> 01:25:52,824 - Come on! - Duke, stop it. 1677 01:25:55,031 --> 01:25:58,156 Sebastian! 1678 01:25:58,240 --> 01:26:00,573 [Viola as Sebastian] Duke! Stop it! 1679 01:26:00,657 --> 01:26:03,156 Come on! 1680 01:26:03,240 --> 01:26:04,699 - Ah! - OK! 1681 01:26:04,782 --> 01:26:07,156 [Viola as Sebastian] Stop it! Oh, my God! 1682 01:26:07,240 --> 01:26:10,323 If you want to roughhouse, please take it at least 500 yards 1683 01:26:10,407 --> 01:26:13,323 - away from the stadium grounds. - Break it up! Break it up! 1684 01:26:13,407 --> 01:26:16,365 OK, tough guys. 1685 01:26:16,448 --> 01:26:20,281 You want to box? You get out of my stadium. 1686 01:26:20,365 --> 01:26:22,490 Otherwise, get on with the game. All right? 1687 01:26:22,573 --> 01:26:24,699 Come on, now, Armadillos of Illyria. 1688 01:26:24,782 --> 01:26:26,490 That goes for the rest of you! 1689 01:26:26,573 --> 01:26:29,949 Now get on and play some real football! 1690 01:26:30,031 --> 01:26:32,990 - Like a bunch of girls. - [Gold] OK. [clears throat] 1691 01:26:33,073 --> 01:26:37,490 The rest of you, let's play some real football like a bunch of girls. 1692 01:26:37,573 --> 01:26:40,198 - All right? - You suck! 1693 01:26:40,281 --> 01:26:44,031 [Gold] It's not football, it's soccer. That's what we call it in the States. 1694 01:26:44,115 --> 01:26:46,240 - Sebastian! Are you OK? - Uh-oh. 1695 01:26:46,323 --> 01:26:48,031 No, Olivia, Not now. 1696 01:26:48,115 --> 01:26:50,323 Try to tell me again there's nothing going on. 1697 01:26:50,407 --> 01:26:52,031 There is nothing going on! 1698 01:26:52,115 --> 01:26:53,824 What about last night? 1699 01:26:53,907 --> 01:26:56,240 I didn't lie to you, Duke. 1700 01:26:56,323 --> 01:26:59,699 I did, but not about this. 1701 01:26:59,782 --> 01:27:02,532 Here's the truth. 1702 01:27:02,615 --> 01:27:03,865 I love you. 1703 01:27:03,949 --> 01:27:06,407 - [boy] Huh? - I beg your pardon? 1704 01:27:06,490 --> 01:27:10,031 What? All right... What're you...? That's just a little weird. 1705 01:27:10,115 --> 01:27:13,407 OK, you know what? I can't do this anymore. 1706 01:27:13,490 --> 01:27:16,990 Everybody, I have something to tell you. 1707 01:27:17,073 --> 01:27:19,865 I'm not Sebastian. 1708 01:27:19,949 --> 01:27:21,323 I'm Viola. 1709 01:27:21,407 --> 01:27:23,031 Wait. You're not Viola. 1710 01:27:23,115 --> 01:27:25,865 - Yes, I am. - No, I know Viola. 1711 01:27:25,990 --> 01:27:28,365 - I... I kissed Viola. - You kissed me. 1712 01:27:28,448 --> 01:27:32,573 What are you talking about? I didn't kiss you. 1713 01:27:32,657 --> 01:27:36,573 The girls' team at Cornwall got cut. 1714 01:27:36,657 --> 01:27:39,907 The guys wouldn't let me go out for their team. 1715 01:27:39,990 --> 01:27:43,407 So I've been pretending to be my brother 1716 01:27:43,490 --> 01:27:47,615 while he was in London for the past two weeks... Ow. 1717 01:27:47,699 --> 01:27:52,156 ...so I could make the team and beat Cornwall. Ow. 1718 01:27:53,949 --> 01:27:57,281 [all] Whoa! 1719 01:27:57,365 --> 01:27:59,782 But my brother came home early. 1720 01:27:59,865 --> 01:28:04,865 And that's who you saw kissing Olivia and that's who played the first half. 1721 01:28:04,949 --> 01:28:07,573 Just because you wear a wig doesn't prove you're a girl. 1722 01:28:07,657 --> 01:28:11,824 - OK, then. - [shouting] 1723 01:28:11,907 --> 01:28:14,073 Merciful Jesus. 1724 01:28:14,156 --> 01:28:15,782 - [boy] Yeah! Whoo-hoo! - [whistling] 1725 01:28:15,865 --> 01:28:17,782 - Viola?! - Is it just me 1726 01:28:17,865 --> 01:28:20,323 or does this soccer game have more nudity than most? 1727 01:28:20,407 --> 01:28:22,448 All right, so everybody understand? 1728 01:28:22,532 --> 01:28:24,573 - [boy] Yeah. I get it. - OK. 1729 01:28:24,657 --> 01:28:27,657 Wait a minute. If I kissed your brother, where is he? 1730 01:28:27,740 --> 01:28:31,156 [scoffs] Probably halfway to China. He showed his willis and doodleberries... 1731 01:28:31,240 --> 01:28:33,073 - Present. - Oh. Hi. 1732 01:28:33,156 --> 01:28:35,115 [boy] What the...? 1733 01:28:35,198 --> 01:28:37,448 OK, this is freaking me out. 1734 01:28:37,532 --> 01:28:39,490 [grunting] 1735 01:28:39,573 --> 01:28:43,573 Ladies and gentlemen, I hate to say "I told you so," but I just... Ow. 1736 01:28:43,657 --> 01:28:47,615 See, Duke? I didn't betray you. 1737 01:28:47,699 --> 01:28:48,990 I'm sorry. 1738 01:28:49,073 --> 01:28:51,490 This isn't how I wanted it to happen, 1739 01:28:51,573 --> 01:28:53,990 and I didn't want to hurt you. 1740 01:28:54,073 --> 01:28:57,615 But I just wanted to prove that I was good enough. 1741 01:28:57,699 --> 01:28:59,990 All I'm asking for is a chance. 1742 01:29:03,865 --> 01:29:06,073 Duke? 1743 01:29:11,240 --> 01:29:14,240 It's just like what coach says before every game: 1744 01:29:15,782 --> 01:29:19,532 "Be not afraid of greatness. 1745 01:29:19,615 --> 01:29:23,031 Some are born great. Some achieve greatness. 1746 01:29:23,115 --> 01:29:28,156 And some have greatness thrust upon them." 1747 01:29:28,240 --> 01:29:32,240 I think the best chance for us to be great here today is to have you play. 1748 01:29:32,323 --> 01:29:34,865 - Yeah! - All right! 1749 01:29:34,949 --> 01:29:38,699 - [all cheering] - Yeah! Yeah! No! 1750 01:29:38,782 --> 01:29:40,198 No playing! 1751 01:29:40,281 --> 01:29:42,156 You have to forfeit. 1752 01:29:42,240 --> 01:29:44,907 There's no girls in this league. Here. Look in the manual. 1753 01:29:46,949 --> 01:29:48,198 What manual? 1754 01:29:48,281 --> 01:29:51,323 Listen, pal. You're in Illyria. 1755 01:29:51,407 --> 01:29:56,198 We don't discriminate based on gender. 1756 01:29:56,281 --> 01:29:58,240 All right. 1757 01:29:58,323 --> 01:30:00,365 That's gonna bruise. 1758 01:30:00,448 --> 01:30:03,907 Fine. You really think you can beat us 1759 01:30:03,990 --> 01:30:05,907 - with a girl on your team? - [laughter] 1760 01:30:05,990 --> 01:30:08,365 This should be fun. 1761 01:30:08,448 --> 01:30:09,865 Go. 1762 01:30:09,949 --> 01:30:12,782 I get to say the last word, not you. Go. 1763 01:30:15,031 --> 01:30:16,532 OK, team... 1764 01:30:16,615 --> 01:30:20,198 - ...let's go kick! Kill! - Yeah! 1765 01:30:20,281 --> 01:30:22,031 Come on! Come on! 1766 01:30:22,115 --> 01:30:24,740 [announcer] Well, folks, this is a real nail-biter. 1767 01:30:24,824 --> 01:30:28,323 It's a tie score at the bottom of the second half. 1768 01:30:58,699 --> 01:31:00,949 , , Come on, come on! Open up! 1769 01:31:15,532 --> 01:31:17,907 , - [whistle blows] - What? 1770 01:31:17,990 --> 01:31:22,156 Foul? That's not a foul! He got all ball! 1771 01:31:27,865 --> 01:31:30,407 And the penalty kick will decide the game. 1772 01:31:38,907 --> 01:31:40,532 Where you gonna kick it? Right here? 1773 01:31:40,615 --> 01:31:42,490 I know you're gonna kick it there. 1774 01:31:42,573 --> 01:31:44,782 Am I in your head? Am I in your head? 1775 01:31:44,865 --> 01:31:48,156 You see the goal? It's getting smaller and I'm getting bigger. 1776 01:31:48,240 --> 01:31:49,699 [echoing] Come on. 1777 01:31:49,782 --> 01:31:51,323 I love you. 1778 01:31:51,407 --> 01:31:53,990 Concentrate. Don't kick like a girl. 1779 01:31:54,073 --> 01:31:56,615 Guys are better. It's not gonna happen. 1780 01:31:56,699 --> 01:31:59,281 You're a loser! This is my house! 1781 01:31:59,365 --> 01:32:01,365 You're pathetic! I'm in your head. [chuckles] 1782 01:32:01,448 --> 01:32:03,281 [whistle blows] 1783 01:32:12,699 --> 01:32:14,615 [grunting] 1784 01:32:14,699 --> 01:32:18,365 - Yeah! - [all cheering] 1785 01:32:18,448 --> 01:32:22,949 - That's my girl! - Mine too! 1786 01:32:32,949 --> 01:32:35,907 [sobbing] It's not fair! It's not fair! 1787 01:32:35,990 --> 01:32:37,657 That was a lucky shot! 1788 01:32:37,740 --> 01:32:40,198 I never wanna see you again! 1789 01:32:40,281 --> 01:32:43,949 You suck! [wailing] 1790 01:32:48,949 --> 01:32:51,699 - You did it, Vi! - You were so awesome! 1791 01:32:51,782 --> 01:32:54,532 - I am so proud of you. - It's over. 1792 01:32:54,615 --> 01:32:56,990 You just scored the game-winning goal. Say something. 1793 01:32:57,073 --> 01:32:59,865 Mom? Dad? 1794 01:33:01,990 --> 01:33:04,573 - That was really something. - Thanks, Dad. 1795 01:33:04,657 --> 01:33:06,740 You did all this to play soccer? 1796 01:33:06,824 --> 01:33:08,240 I told you, it's important to me. 1797 01:33:08,323 --> 01:33:11,907 If Viola was here pretending to be you, 1798 01:33:11,990 --> 01:33:14,115 - where were you? - Oh, he was, um... 1799 01:33:14,198 --> 01:33:16,115 I was in London playing my music. 1800 01:33:16,198 --> 01:33:18,240 - [both] London? - It was important to me. 1801 01:33:18,323 --> 01:33:21,740 [shouts overlapping] 1802 01:33:21,824 --> 01:33:24,115 Mom, Dad... Hey! 1803 01:33:24,198 --> 01:33:28,365 Why don't we go to dinner? As a family? 1804 01:33:28,448 --> 01:33:31,532 - Maybe tomorrow? - I suppose I could fit that in. 1805 01:33:31,615 --> 01:33:34,031 Would you like to have my cell phone number? 1806 01:33:34,115 --> 01:33:36,407 - Let me give you my email. - All right. 1807 01:33:36,490 --> 01:33:37,782 Yay! 1808 01:33:37,865 --> 01:33:39,782 - Good job. - Thank you. 1809 01:33:39,865 --> 01:33:42,990 Oh, wait! There is somebody I want you to officially meet. 1810 01:33:43,073 --> 01:33:48,615 Sebastian Hastings, Olivia Lennox. 1811 01:33:48,699 --> 01:33:51,073 - It's very nice to meet you. - You too. 1812 01:33:51,156 --> 01:33:54,699 So, uh, I heard you like my lyrics. 1813 01:33:56,865 --> 01:34:00,865 - Eunice? - Toby? 1814 01:34:03,532 --> 01:34:06,115 I have something to say. 1815 01:34:06,198 --> 01:34:08,782 I think you are... 1816 01:34:08,865 --> 01:34:11,573 ...amazing. 1817 01:34:12,657 --> 01:34:15,073 And I'm not ashamed of it. 1818 01:34:18,365 --> 01:34:20,657 I know tricks. 1819 01:34:20,740 --> 01:34:23,031 Oh, Eunice. 1820 01:34:25,198 --> 01:34:29,156 [moaning] 1821 01:34:29,240 --> 01:34:32,740 [♪ Ray LaMontagne: Hold You in My Arms] 1822 01:34:38,281 --> 01:34:42,657 ♪ When you came to me ♪ 1823 01:34:42,740 --> 01:34:47,198 ♪ With your bad dreams and your fears ♪ 1824 01:34:47,281 --> 01:34:49,865 ♪ It was easy to see ♪ 1825 01:34:49,949 --> 01:34:56,031 ♪ That you'd been crying ♪ 1826 01:34:56,115 --> 01:34:58,156 ♪ Seems like everywhere you turn ♪ 1827 01:34:58,240 --> 01:35:00,949 Hey, roomie. 1828 01:35:01,031 --> 01:35:03,281 This is for you. 1829 01:35:03,365 --> 01:35:09,448 ♪ But who really profits from the dying ♪ 1830 01:35:12,824 --> 01:35:18,615 ♪ I could hold you in my arms ♪ 1831 01:35:21,448 --> 01:35:25,699 ♪ I could hold you forever ♪ 1832 01:35:25,782 --> 01:35:28,657 "The Stratford Junior League invites you 1833 01:35:28,740 --> 01:35:33,115 to the 38th Annual Debutante Ball." 1834 01:35:34,990 --> 01:35:38,740 - He still could show, you know. - You didn't see his face. 1835 01:35:38,824 --> 01:35:41,073 I found the perfect dress. 1836 01:35:41,156 --> 01:35:42,990 Aw, thanks, Mom, 1837 01:35:43,073 --> 01:35:45,073 but I don't think I'm gonna get a chance to wear it. 1838 01:35:45,156 --> 01:35:46,782 Nonsense. 1839 01:35:46,865 --> 01:35:51,407 You don't need a man to wear a beautiful dress. 1840 01:35:51,490 --> 01:35:53,532 But it doesn't hurt. 1841 01:35:53,615 --> 01:35:55,407 Viola Hastings, 1842 01:35:55,490 --> 01:35:58,073 it would be my honor to escort you tonight. 1843 01:35:58,156 --> 01:36:00,073 Thanks, Paul. That's really sweet. 1844 01:36:00,156 --> 01:36:02,573 Caterpillars! Caterpillars! My precious caterpillars. 1845 01:36:02,657 --> 01:36:05,907 In 20 minutes you'll all be beautiful butterflies. 1846 01:36:05,990 --> 01:36:09,115 [all chuckling] Caterpillars! Butterflies! 1847 01:36:09,198 --> 01:36:13,156 You look beautiful. I just... I gotta get some air. 1848 01:36:35,990 --> 01:36:38,532 [footsteps approaching] 1849 01:36:44,990 --> 01:36:48,615 I didn't think you'd show up. 1850 01:36:48,699 --> 01:36:52,532 It really means a lot to me that you're here. 1851 01:36:53,365 --> 01:36:54,657 Say something. 1852 01:36:54,740 --> 01:36:57,865 I gotta turn the sprinklers on. 1853 01:36:58,990 --> 01:37:01,073 Sorry. 1854 01:37:08,865 --> 01:37:10,532 Hi. 1855 01:37:10,615 --> 01:37:11,990 Hi. 1856 01:37:12,073 --> 01:37:15,281 So, what brings you here? 1857 01:37:16,365 --> 01:37:19,323 Well, a few days ago, 1858 01:37:19,407 --> 01:37:23,532 I kissed this girl at a kissing booth. 1859 01:37:23,615 --> 01:37:29,365 And now I just can't seem to stop thinking about it. 1860 01:37:29,448 --> 01:37:31,323 Neither can she. 1861 01:37:31,407 --> 01:37:33,824 Plus, 1862 01:37:33,907 --> 01:37:35,824 I miss my roommate. 1863 01:37:35,907 --> 01:37:39,323 [laughs] I really liked him. 1864 01:37:39,407 --> 01:37:41,824 Well... 1865 01:37:41,907 --> 01:37:44,699 ...he's right in here. 1866 01:37:44,782 --> 01:37:50,198 Listen, I know I should've told you who I was but... 1867 01:37:50,281 --> 01:37:51,782 ...I was afraid. 1868 01:37:53,907 --> 01:37:57,156 - Sorry. - Well, 1869 01:37:57,240 --> 01:37:59,699 you know, maybe if I'd have known you were a girl, 1870 01:37:59,782 --> 01:38:02,156 we wouldn't have talked like we did 1871 01:38:02,240 --> 01:38:05,490 and got to know each other the same way. 1872 01:38:05,573 --> 01:38:09,532 And that would have been a shame. 1873 01:38:09,615 --> 01:38:12,073 Just so you know, 1874 01:38:12,156 --> 01:38:16,657 everything you told me when I was a guy just... 1875 01:38:16,740 --> 01:38:20,657 ...made me like you so much more as a girl. 1876 01:38:20,740 --> 01:38:23,532 OK, but just from here on in, 1877 01:38:23,615 --> 01:38:26,657 everything would just be a lot easier 1878 01:38:26,740 --> 01:38:30,198 - if you stayed a girl. - [laughs] 1879 01:38:30,281 --> 01:38:32,365 I promise. 1880 01:38:32,448 --> 01:38:37,782 Monique Valentine, escorted by Justin Drayton. 1881 01:38:37,865 --> 01:38:41,031 [applause] 1882 01:38:46,782 --> 01:38:48,448 [boy] Justin, you're the man! 1883 01:38:55,156 --> 01:38:59,740 Olivia Lennox, escorted by Sebastian Hastings. 1884 01:38:59,824 --> 01:39:01,990 [cheering] 1885 01:39:06,281 --> 01:39:12,448 Viola Hastings, escorted by Paul Antonio. 1886 01:39:12,532 --> 01:39:15,907 [applause] 1887 01:39:17,365 --> 01:39:19,615 Viola Hastings. 1888 01:39:19,699 --> 01:39:21,782 - [crowd silences] - [man sneezes] 1889 01:39:21,865 --> 01:39:25,031 This is typical. Well, where is she? 1890 01:39:28,824 --> 01:39:31,407 [crowd cheering] 1891 01:39:39,532 --> 01:39:42,657 [screaming] 1892 01:39:59,031 --> 01:40:01,240 [inaudible] 1893 01:40:02,407 --> 01:40:04,824 Whoo! 1894 01:40:04,907 --> 01:40:07,240 [♪ All-American Rejects: Move Along] 1895 01:40:15,281 --> 01:40:21,156 ♪ Go ahead as you waste your days with thinking ♪ 1896 01:40:21,240 --> 01:40:24,365 ♪ When you fall everyone stands ♪ 1897 01:40:24,448 --> 01:40:29,824 ♪ Another day, and you've had your fill of sinking ♪ 1898 01:40:29,907 --> 01:40:32,865 ♪ With the life held in your... ♪ 1899 01:40:32,949 --> 01:40:36,532 ♪ Hands are shaking cold ♪ 1900 01:40:36,615 --> 01:40:40,865 ♪ These hands are meant to hold ♪ 1901 01:40:40,949 --> 01:40:42,532 ♪ Speak to me ♪ 1902 01:40:42,615 --> 01:40:45,240 ♪ When all you got to keep is strong ♪ 1903 01:40:45,323 --> 01:40:51,198 ♪ Move along, move along like I know ya do ♪ 1904 01:40:51,281 --> 01:40:54,031 ♪ And even when your hope is gone ♪ 1905 01:40:54,115 --> 01:40:58,573 ♪ Move along, move along just to make it through ♪ 1906 01:40:58,657 --> 01:41:01,323 ♪ Move along ♪ 1907 01:41:02,657 --> 01:41:08,031 ♪ Move along ♪ 1908 01:41:08,115 --> 01:41:13,532 ♪ So a day when you've lost yourself completely ♪ 1909 01:41:13,615 --> 01:41:17,031 ♪ Could be a night when your life ends ♪ 1910 01:41:17,115 --> 01:41:22,240 ♪ Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving ♪ 1911 01:41:22,323 --> 01:41:25,407 ♪ All the pain held in your... ♪ 1912 01:41:25,490 --> 01:41:29,115 ♪ Hands are shaking cold ♪ 1913 01:41:29,198 --> 01:41:32,782 ♪ Your hands are mine to hold ♪ 1914 01:41:32,865 --> 01:41:37,740 ♪ Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong ♪ 1915 01:41:37,824 --> 01:41:43,407 ♪ Move along, move along like I know you do ♪ 1916 01:41:43,490 --> 01:41:46,448 ♪ And even when your hope is gone ♪ 1917 01:41:46,532 --> 01:41:50,949 ♪ Move along, move along just to make it through ♪ 1918 01:41:51,031 --> 01:41:55,740 ♪ Move along Go on, go on, go on, go on ♪ 1919 01:41:55,824 --> 01:41:58,907 ♪ When everything is wrong ♪ 1920 01:41:58,990 --> 01:42:00,573 ♪ We move along ♪ 1921 01:42:00,657 --> 01:42:04,573 ♪ Go on, go on, go on, go on ♪ 1922 01:42:04,657 --> 01:42:07,448 ♪ When everything is wrong ♪ 1923 01:42:07,532 --> 01:42:11,281 ♪ We move along ♪ 1924 01:42:11,365 --> 01:42:12,949 ♪ Along ♪ 1925 01:42:13,031 --> 01:42:15,281 ♪ Along ♪ 1926 01:42:15,365 --> 01:42:17,281 ♪ Along ♪ 1927 01:42:17,365 --> 01:42:19,615 ♪ Along ♪ 1928 01:42:19,699 --> 01:42:21,615 ♪ Along ♪ 1929 01:42:21,699 --> 01:42:27,323 ♪ Along ♪ 1930 01:42:27,407 --> 01:42:30,115 ♪ When all you got to keep is strong ♪ 1931 01:42:30,198 --> 01:42:35,949 ♪ Move along, move along like I know you do ♪ 1932 01:42:36,031 --> 01:42:38,782 ♪ And even when your hope is gone ♪ 1933 01:42:38,865 --> 01:42:44,699 ♪ Move along, move along just to make it through ♪ 1934 01:42:44,782 --> 01:42:47,657 ♪ When all you got to keep is strong ♪ 1935 01:42:47,740 --> 01:42:53,365 ♪ Move along, move along like I know you do ♪ 1936 01:42:53,448 --> 01:42:56,323 ♪ And even when your hope is gone ♪ 1937 01:42:56,407 --> 01:43:00,323 ♪ Move along, move along just to make it through ♪ 1938 01:43:00,407 --> 01:43:02,281 ♪ Just to make it through ♪ 1939 01:43:02,365 --> 01:43:05,115 ♪ When all you got to keep is strong ♪ 1940 01:43:05,198 --> 01:43:09,198 ♪ Move along, move along like I know you do ♪ 1941 01:43:09,281 --> 01:43:10,949 ♪ I know you do ♪ 1942 01:43:11,031 --> 01:43:13,824 ♪ And even when your hope is gone ♪ 1943 01:43:13,907 --> 01:43:18,782 ♪ Move along, move along just to make it through ♪ 1944 01:43:18,865 --> 01:43:19,990 ♪ Move along ♪ 1945 01:43:20,073 --> 01:43:23,657 ♪ Go on, go on, go on, go on ♪ 1946 01:43:23,740 --> 01:43:26,740 ♪ Right back what is wrong ♪ 1947 01:43:26,824 --> 01:43:28,490 ♪ We move along ♪ 1948 01:43:28,573 --> 01:43:32,532 ♪ Go on, go on, go on, go on ♪ 1949 01:43:32,615 --> 01:43:35,240 ♪ Right back what is wrong ♪ 1950 01:43:35,323 --> 01:43:37,365 ♪ We move along ♪ 1951 01:43:37,448 --> 01:43:41,198 ♪ Go on, go on, go on, go on ♪ 1952 01:43:41,281 --> 01:43:44,198 ♪ Right back what is wrong ♪ 1953 01:43:44,281 --> 01:43:46,699 ♪ We move along ♪ 1954 01:43:46,782 --> 01:43:49,949 ♪ Go on, go on, go on, go on ♪