1 00:00:06,789 --> 00:00:09,109 Oh, simple Allison. 2 00:00:09,636 --> 00:00:12,359 Previously on "Kevin Can [BLEEP] Himself"... 3 00:00:12,384 --> 00:00:15,170 I just don't know when I got so isolated from everyone. 4 00:00:15,195 --> 00:00:17,166 You blew up my life. Was that just for fun? 5 00:00:17,191 --> 00:00:18,546 I felt sorry for you. 6 00:00:18,571 --> 00:00:20,115 I was hoping to do some computer research. 7 00:00:20,139 --> 00:00:22,867 About a woman who decides to kill her husband. 8 00:00:22,892 --> 00:00:26,156 I killed with oxycodone and made it look like an O.D. 9 00:00:26,181 --> 00:00:28,742 These types of pills get abused. 10 00:00:28,767 --> 00:00:30,632 Yeah, I've heard. 11 00:00:30,657 --> 00:00:32,898 - I swear, I know someone. - Thank you. 12 00:00:32,923 --> 00:00:34,359 Oh, it's drugs. 13 00:00:35,039 --> 00:00:36,632 Shit. 14 00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,130 Dad! 15 00:00:43,429 --> 00:00:44,914 I hope you still have some contacts 16 00:00:44,939 --> 00:00:48,016 in the Miracles Department of the church, because this... 17 00:00:48,041 --> 00:00:49,274 ... qualifies. 18 00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:51,671 That is a great bag. 19 00:00:51,696 --> 00:00:53,437 Very roomy. 20 00:00:53,462 --> 00:00:55,551 I think he's talking about what's inside. 21 00:00:55,576 --> 00:00:57,578 Please don't be alive. Please don't be alive. 22 00:00:57,603 --> 00:00:59,213 Also, please don't be dead. 23 00:01:00,321 --> 00:01:02,428 So, there I was, walking down the street. 24 00:01:02,453 --> 00:01:04,560 No one else was around when... boom! 25 00:01:04,585 --> 00:01:06,671 This just appeared in front of me. 26 00:01:09,504 --> 00:01:10,789 Kevin! 27 00:01:12,484 --> 00:01:14,771 "Hart Live at the Worcester Centrum." 28 00:01:14,796 --> 00:01:16,467 W... You took that?! 29 00:01:16,733 --> 00:01:19,882 The wind took it off the side of the Worcester Centrum. 30 00:01:20,158 --> 00:01:21,447 And it's got your name on it, 31 00:01:21,472 --> 00:01:23,320 so legally, it belongs to you. 32 00:01:23,345 --> 00:01:26,539 Wow, your grasp of the legal system is so interesting. 33 00:01:26,564 --> 00:01:29,045 My public defender said the same thing. 34 00:01:29,460 --> 00:01:31,968 Let's hang my banner off the side of the house, yeah? 35 00:01:31,993 --> 00:01:34,199 After we staple the good sheets over 36 00:01:34,224 --> 00:01:36,052 anything that doesn't say "Kevin." 37 00:01:36,077 --> 00:01:37,855 Why would you specify the good... 38 00:01:37,979 --> 00:01:39,459 Never mind. 39 00:01:39,484 --> 00:01:42,058 Alright, ideas on how we can do this? 40 00:01:42,225 --> 00:01:44,100 I got my dad's towing winches. 41 00:01:44,125 --> 00:01:45,366 You're a winch. 42 00:01:46,809 --> 00:01:50,021 No, guys, we use the towing winches 43 00:01:50,046 --> 00:01:51,415 to do a pulley system. 44 00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:53,784 A "system?" Patty, we're climbing one roof. 45 00:01:53,809 --> 00:01:55,343 We're not gonna take Vegas. 46 00:01:55,513 --> 00:01:56,818 I know. 47 00:01:56,843 --> 00:01:58,205 Neil, you shimmy up the drain pipe 48 00:01:58,230 --> 00:01:59,906 and hang it off the old lightning rod. 49 00:01:59,931 --> 00:02:01,906 I'm sure it doesn't do anything important. 50 00:02:01,947 --> 00:02:03,079 Please be careful. 51 00:02:03,104 --> 00:02:05,084 - On it. - Fine! Do it your way! 52 00:02:05,109 --> 00:02:06,251 - Oh. - I'd say break a leg... 53 00:02:06,275 --> 00:02:07,667 but Neil most definitely will. 54 00:02:14,133 --> 00:02:19,133 _ 55 00:02:29,907 --> 00:02:31,720 My brother broke his leg. 56 00:02:33,379 --> 00:02:35,579 40 megs of OxyContin, comin' up. 57 00:02:37,675 --> 00:02:40,222 Remember you missed prom 'cause Neil got a concussion? 58 00:02:41,667 --> 00:02:43,359 Yeah, Terrance. 59 00:02:43,384 --> 00:02:45,360 That's why I didn't go to the prom. 60 00:02:46,532 --> 00:02:48,820 I called ahead, you know. They should be ready. 61 00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:50,210 Gotta wait all day? 62 00:02:51,544 --> 00:02:53,503 You know, these pills are pricey. 63 00:02:53,784 --> 00:02:56,265 I could get my hands on some generics for you. 64 00:02:56,290 --> 00:02:57,438 In the future. 65 00:02:57,463 --> 00:02:59,857 It's alright. Medicaid covers it. 66 00:03:00,121 --> 00:03:01,718 I mean, like... 67 00:03:01,743 --> 00:03:03,487 they only give you 10 of these. 68 00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:06,212 So if your brother ever needs a refill, 69 00:03:06,237 --> 00:03:09,501 come back and see me for the generic. 70 00:03:11,103 --> 00:03:12,884 Oh, I... 71 00:03:14,609 --> 00:03:16,243 No. 72 00:03:19,614 --> 00:03:20,958 You got a degree. 73 00:03:20,983 --> 00:03:22,550 A good job. 74 00:03:22,837 --> 00:03:25,117 Don't be an idiot with this stuff, Terrance. 75 00:03:25,616 --> 00:03:26,895 With what? 76 00:03:31,888 --> 00:03:34,276 Okay, lady, let's get you out of this chair. 77 00:03:34,301 --> 00:03:36,281 - Ooh. - You got it? 78 00:03:36,306 --> 00:03:37,759 I'm not an invalid yet. 79 00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:39,478 Okay. Okay. 80 00:03:43,270 --> 00:03:46,099 Oh, before I forget, hand me my pocket book. 81 00:03:47,835 --> 00:03:49,837 I think you'll like it. 82 00:03:49,862 --> 00:03:52,142 Nobody has taken it out in ages, 83 00:03:52,175 --> 00:03:54,308 so, eh, just keep it. 84 00:03:55,369 --> 00:03:56,498 _ 85 00:03:58,998 --> 00:04:00,501 Thanks. 86 00:04:00,986 --> 00:04:02,631 Oh, Jesus. 87 00:04:03,498 --> 00:04:04,910 Oh... 88 00:04:04,935 --> 00:04:07,615 Hey. You okay? 89 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:09,723 It's just this damn sciatica. 90 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,339 My do-gooder sister-in-law's 91 00:04:12,364 --> 00:04:14,514 taken to picking up my groceries for me. 92 00:04:14,539 --> 00:04:16,193 I-I-It's just hard. 93 00:04:16,361 --> 00:04:17,710 Friggin' doctor visits 94 00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:19,215 are too expensive without insurance, 95 00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:20,583 and the pain is just... 96 00:04:20,608 --> 00:04:22,935 You know, some days, it's just bad. 97 00:04:23,995 --> 00:04:25,849 Judi. 98 00:04:26,603 --> 00:04:28,207 I'm fine. 99 00:04:41,231 --> 00:04:43,621 I'm gonna be needing some generics. 100 00:04:50,683 --> 00:04:55,683 Synced and corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 101 00:04:56,867 --> 00:05:00,207 _ 102 00:05:00,232 --> 00:05:02,090 What the hell are you doing here? 103 00:05:02,462 --> 00:05:04,308 - I... - You've never been in here before. 104 00:05:04,333 --> 00:05:07,467 I know. But I want a wash. 105 00:05:10,198 --> 00:05:11,805 Like Barb gets. 106 00:05:11,830 --> 00:05:13,418 - No, you don't. - Yes, I do. 107 00:05:13,443 --> 00:05:15,289 I need them. I need it. 108 00:05:15,314 --> 00:05:16,619 Why? 109 00:05:18,219 --> 00:05:19,830 Back pain. 110 00:05:22,102 --> 00:05:23,391 - Bullshit. - Okay, well, 111 00:05:23,416 --> 00:05:24,638 how the hell would you know? 112 00:05:24,663 --> 00:05:25,664 Because you're a terrible liar. 113 00:05:25,688 --> 00:05:27,328 Even you don't believe what you're saying. 114 00:05:28,336 --> 00:05:30,334 Oh, Jesus, why does this have to be so hard? 115 00:05:31,878 --> 00:05:33,287 I don't have anything for you. 116 00:05:33,312 --> 00:05:34,562 Of course you don't. 117 00:05:34,859 --> 00:05:38,469 You'll have to wait till I re-up Monday afternoon. 118 00:05:39,425 --> 00:05:41,166 W... Monday? 119 00:05:41,191 --> 00:05:44,275 Like, this Monday? Like, three da... Like, 72 hours? 120 00:05:44,300 --> 00:05:45,984 We all know you can do math. 121 00:05:46,009 --> 00:05:49,803 Okay, that... Monday is great. 122 00:05:49,828 --> 00:05:50,872 That is amazing. 123 00:05:50,897 --> 00:05:54,824 I will be here for the wash on Monday. 124 00:05:55,266 --> 00:05:56,590 Thank you, thank you, thank you. 125 00:05:56,615 --> 00:05:57,834 Okay. 126 00:05:57,859 --> 00:05:59,459 But for now, get out of here. 127 00:05:59,805 --> 00:06:03,553 - Is it, like, dangerous or something? - No. 128 00:06:03,578 --> 00:06:05,891 I'm just done being around you. 129 00:06:09,032 --> 00:06:10,945 Thank you. 130 00:06:15,956 --> 00:06:17,741 Here for another free coffee? 131 00:06:17,766 --> 00:06:19,727 Wait, you serve free coffee here? 132 00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:22,357 Uh, you keep leaving before you actually pay. 133 00:06:22,687 --> 00:06:24,750 Oh, my gosh. You're right. 134 00:06:24,775 --> 00:06:27,256 I... Well, I promise to pay for this one... 135 00:06:27,281 --> 00:06:28,883 And the other two. 136 00:06:28,908 --> 00:06:30,757 It's been sitting for a while. Make a fresh pot. 137 00:06:30,781 --> 00:06:32,566 No, no, I'm not picky. 138 00:06:34,367 --> 00:06:36,664 Um... 139 00:06:36,689 --> 00:06:40,171 I am sorry for the other night. 140 00:06:40,312 --> 00:06:41,992 Just had a really bad day, 141 00:06:42,017 --> 00:06:45,156 and you were saying some stuff that I didn't, uh... 142 00:06:45,181 --> 00:06:46,694 It's not a big deal. 143 00:06:46,719 --> 00:06:48,883 Wha... No, I was rude. 144 00:06:49,246 --> 00:06:51,336 When I'm around you, I feel... 145 00:06:51,671 --> 00:06:54,797 I don't know... 15, and I was a brat at 15. 146 00:06:54,822 --> 00:06:57,522 So I am sorry. 147 00:07:01,831 --> 00:07:03,746 - It's cold. - I told you I'd make a new pot. 148 00:07:03,771 --> 00:07:05,105 - I c... it's not... - No, no. 149 00:07:05,129 --> 00:07:07,471 No, it's okay. I deserve this. 150 00:07:10,125 --> 00:07:11,479 Mmm. 151 00:07:11,504 --> 00:07:13,831 - Mm. - Mm. So stoic. 152 00:07:18,592 --> 00:07:21,237 I'm sorry, too. 153 00:07:22,034 --> 00:07:24,751 I think I was kinda harsh to cover the fact 154 00:07:24,776 --> 00:07:27,795 that seeing you again makes me feel a little... 155 00:07:27,972 --> 00:07:29,244 guilty. 156 00:07:29,892 --> 00:07:31,046 Oh, yeah? 157 00:07:31,071 --> 00:07:33,334 When I was working the steps with my sponsor, 158 00:07:33,472 --> 00:07:36,050 I listed out people to make amends to, 159 00:07:36,075 --> 00:07:38,208 and you were on there. 160 00:07:38,722 --> 00:07:41,050 Maybe towards the top. 161 00:07:41,075 --> 00:07:43,073 If anyone deserved a call... 162 00:07:44,054 --> 00:07:45,752 I just didn't do it. 163 00:07:46,487 --> 00:07:48,120 What, did you lose my number? 164 00:07:48,145 --> 00:07:49,683 Nope, just a coward. 165 00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:58,238 You know, I'm getting my chip in AA tomorrow night. 166 00:07:58,590 --> 00:08:00,069 Eight years sober. 167 00:08:00,094 --> 00:08:01,412 - Eight years? - Yeah. 168 00:08:01,437 --> 00:08:03,004 Wow! 169 00:08:03,029 --> 00:08:05,684 Feel like I don't even know this version of you. 170 00:08:07,164 --> 00:08:09,121 You look the same, though. 171 00:08:10,893 --> 00:08:13,199 I like that you think I'm the same. 172 00:08:15,586 --> 00:08:17,113 You are. 173 00:08:18,207 --> 00:08:22,324 They say to invite people to these things. 174 00:08:24,010 --> 00:08:26,481 Would you come? 175 00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:29,396 Consider it me making my amends. 176 00:08:33,234 --> 00:08:36,077 So, you got a special occasion you wanna look nice for? 177 00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:39,507 Sure, my husband's taking me to Paris. 178 00:08:40,407 --> 00:08:43,140 No, this is self-care. 179 00:08:43,350 --> 00:08:45,593 Last time, we did those swoopy layers. 180 00:08:45,618 --> 00:08:47,763 Cathy in accountin' says, "Nice haircut." 181 00:08:47,788 --> 00:08:49,529 And I knew what she meant. 182 00:08:49,647 --> 00:08:52,463 And she's insisting on a band. Can you imagine? 183 00:08:52,488 --> 00:08:54,319 No. 184 00:08:54,791 --> 00:08:56,757 - Hey. - Hey, Cindy. 185 00:08:57,858 --> 00:09:00,201 Hoping you can squeeze me in for a wash? 186 00:09:00,226 --> 00:09:02,063 Okay, great. 187 00:09:02,389 --> 00:09:04,179 One sec, hon. 188 00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:06,882 Let's have a look at the book. 189 00:09:08,218 --> 00:09:11,115 So, thing is, I'm cleaned out at the moment. 190 00:09:11,525 --> 00:09:13,812 We had a couple people in rough shape this week, 191 00:09:13,837 --> 00:09:15,849 needed a bit more, but I'm re-upping Monday. 192 00:09:15,874 --> 00:09:17,710 I sorta need 'em now. 193 00:09:18,271 --> 00:09:20,030 Listen, Cindy, I know your knee's blown, 194 00:09:20,055 --> 00:09:22,630 but for a day or two, toss back a few ibuprofen. 195 00:09:22,655 --> 00:09:24,085 - It'll be fine. - Patty. 196 00:09:24,110 --> 00:09:26,025 Ibuprofen? Are you serious?! 197 00:09:29,111 --> 00:09:31,123 I really need them. 198 00:09:32,438 --> 00:09:33,939 Okay. 199 00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:35,792 Let me see what I can do, okay? 200 00:09:36,373 --> 00:09:37,561 - Thank you. - Yeah. 201 00:09:37,586 --> 00:09:38,858 Thank you. 202 00:09:41,135 --> 00:09:44,863 For last time. Thanks f-for frontin' for me. 203 00:09:45,363 --> 00:09:46,952 It won't happen again. 204 00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:48,196 No big thing. 205 00:10:02,229 --> 00:10:04,364 Hey, babe, you might want to keep your coat on, 206 00:10:04,389 --> 00:10:07,114 'cause it's about to get "chili" in here. 207 00:10:07,716 --> 00:10:09,161 Chili, the food. 208 00:10:09,764 --> 00:10:11,716 Thank you for clearing that up, Neil. 209 00:10:13,202 --> 00:10:15,372 Can't you just buy the chili this year? 210 00:10:15,895 --> 00:10:17,417 Sweet Allison. 211 00:10:17,442 --> 00:10:19,489 The Renzulli Brothers don't plow our street 212 00:10:19,514 --> 00:10:21,216 in exchange for store-bought chili. 213 00:10:21,241 --> 00:10:22,988 No, they do it 'cause we pay taxes. 214 00:10:23,599 --> 00:10:26,138 The Renzulli Brothers plow our street 215 00:10:26,163 --> 00:10:28,521 early and often because we bribe them in, 216 00:10:28,546 --> 00:10:31,344 and I quote, "Yummy-nummy chili in their tummies." 217 00:10:32,907 --> 00:10:34,304 That's right, and this year, 218 00:10:34,329 --> 00:10:35,729 we're making an extra-special batch 219 00:10:35,754 --> 00:10:37,232 with deep-fried turkey meat... 220 00:10:37,257 --> 00:10:39,521 Prepared, of course, using my brand-new 221 00:10:39,546 --> 00:10:43,400 55,000 BTU All-Pro Stainless Steel Turkey Deep Fryer. 222 00:10:43,425 --> 00:10:44,458 Ooh! 223 00:10:44,483 --> 00:10:46,664 She is a sexy little contraption. 224 00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:48,691 I call her the "Dirty Birdie." 225 00:10:48,996 --> 00:10:50,269 Is that the, uh... 226 00:10:50,294 --> 00:10:51,795 The thing that's set up in our driveway? 227 00:10:51,819 --> 00:10:53,802 Bingo! Best to do it outdoors. 228 00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:55,896 Frying a turkey can be very dangerous. 229 00:10:55,921 --> 00:10:57,871 Yeah, sometimes they explode, 230 00:10:57,896 --> 00:10:59,505 and no one knows why. 231 00:11:00,374 --> 00:11:01,723 Sounds violent. 232 00:11:01,748 --> 00:11:04,935 Don't worry, Mom, I'll be careful. 233 00:11:06,028 --> 00:11:07,255 Oh. 234 00:11:08,146 --> 00:11:10,013 Neil's cooking the exploding turkey. 235 00:11:10,038 --> 00:11:11,779 Yeah. Why? 236 00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:14,552 I guess I was just confused 'cause you usually cook the meat, 237 00:11:14,577 --> 00:11:15,841 so I thought it was your chili. 238 00:11:15,866 --> 00:11:18,809 It is, since I'm the magician behind it. 239 00:11:18,980 --> 00:11:21,801 Uh, well, you know, we both work on it, so... 240 00:11:21,826 --> 00:11:24,615 Yeah, but I'm the main magician. 241 00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,817 You're the random audience member 242 00:11:26,842 --> 00:11:29,018 we can all agree I've never met before. 243 00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:33,214 Um, you're wrong. 244 00:11:34,834 --> 00:11:36,762 What? I said "no offense." 245 00:11:36,918 --> 00:11:38,267 No, you didn't. 246 00:11:38,292 --> 00:11:39,804 I'm wrong? 247 00:11:39,829 --> 00:11:42,090 Uh, if I'm so wrong, 248 00:11:42,115 --> 00:11:44,374 how come my plans, ideas, and goof-arounds work out 249 00:11:44,399 --> 00:11:45,606 99% of the time? 250 00:11:45,639 --> 00:11:48,813 Uh, 'cause you got me jukin' stats and crackin' skulls. 251 00:11:48,916 --> 00:11:50,004 You need me. 252 00:11:50,044 --> 00:11:51,668 Pssh, I don't need anybody. 253 00:11:51,693 --> 00:11:53,260 Fine, then I'll take my 254 00:11:53,285 --> 00:11:55,664 55,000 BTU All-Pro Stainless Steel Turkey Deep Fryer 255 00:11:55,689 --> 00:11:57,082 and make my own chili, 256 00:11:57,107 --> 00:11:59,936 and it's gonna blow yours into the water. 257 00:12:01,248 --> 00:12:04,098 A chili cook-off? 258 00:12:04,616 --> 00:12:06,856 Good luck making anything the Renzulli Bros respect 259 00:12:06,881 --> 00:12:08,143 without my help. 260 00:12:08,168 --> 00:12:11,227 Pfff. I don't need your help! 261 00:12:12,443 --> 00:12:14,317 - 'Cause I've got Allison! - Oh! 262 00:12:14,342 --> 00:12:16,387 She's gonna help me cook the chili, 263 00:12:16,412 --> 00:12:18,277 and she is way better than you. 264 00:12:18,406 --> 00:12:21,184 I can't believe you'd stoop that low. 265 00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:23,848 Oh, we're playing limbo now, baby. 266 00:12:23,873 --> 00:12:26,387 You don't even know how low I can go! 267 00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:28,285 Welcome to the Dream Team, baby. 268 00:12:30,353 --> 00:12:32,418 Yeah, you get out of here with that turkey. 269 00:12:32,567 --> 00:12:34,238 Leave my carrot! 270 00:13:06,830 --> 00:13:08,816 - Neil's not in there. - Geez. 271 00:13:09,904 --> 00:13:11,442 Starting to think I should tie a little bell 272 00:13:11,466 --> 00:13:12,854 to all your cardigans. 273 00:13:13,504 --> 00:13:15,346 This is a new look for you. 274 00:13:15,371 --> 00:13:17,361 No, it's actually an old look. 275 00:13:17,754 --> 00:13:20,707 I used to have a burger every day after swim practice. 276 00:13:20,732 --> 00:13:22,246 I had to earn it. 277 00:13:22,271 --> 00:13:23,715 You go swimming today? 278 00:13:23,740 --> 00:13:26,047 Nope, but I earned it. 279 00:13:26,402 --> 00:13:28,466 And... 280 00:13:28,786 --> 00:13:30,831 the second one was only 50�, 281 00:13:31,262 --> 00:13:33,174 and I can't pass up a deal, so... 282 00:13:33,199 --> 00:13:34,488 You want it? 283 00:13:46,129 --> 00:13:48,697 Of course you're the kind of girl who's always cold. 284 00:13:49,884 --> 00:13:51,879 Why are you eating outside? 285 00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:55,340 Um, I'm just stalling. 286 00:13:56,226 --> 00:13:58,840 Kevin's inside. He and Neil got into a fight. 287 00:13:58,865 --> 00:14:01,112 - They don't do that. - They do now, I guess. 288 00:14:01,137 --> 00:14:02,536 It was nice for the first 30 seconds 289 00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:03,965 until Kevin started looking to me 290 00:14:03,990 --> 00:14:05,950 to fill the Neil-sized hole. 291 00:14:06,404 --> 00:14:08,518 As soon as I go in there, he's gonna put me to work. 292 00:14:08,543 --> 00:14:10,023 So, don't do it. 293 00:14:10,899 --> 00:14:12,814 Like that's an option. 294 00:14:13,069 --> 00:14:15,660 He's just gonna whine until I, like, 295 00:14:15,685 --> 00:14:18,789 drive 90 miles to get pork belly, 296 00:14:18,814 --> 00:14:20,729 or something stupid like that. 297 00:14:20,981 --> 00:14:23,558 This fight between 'em's gonna be the end of me. 298 00:14:23,620 --> 00:14:25,448 Allison, I'm always impressed 299 00:14:25,473 --> 00:14:27,035 with how you can make nothing to do with you 300 00:14:27,059 --> 00:14:28,676 all about you. 301 00:14:29,725 --> 00:14:30,909 Okay. 302 00:14:30,934 --> 00:14:32,012 Well, if I'm so obnoxious, 303 00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,066 why don't you go in there 304 00:14:33,091 --> 00:14:35,707 and deal with Kevin's chili hysteria? 305 00:14:35,732 --> 00:14:37,691 Or go home and deal with Neil's. 306 00:14:37,716 --> 00:14:39,941 Go on, Patty. Go be one of the boys. 307 00:14:45,043 --> 00:14:46,790 I knew it. 308 00:14:47,170 --> 00:14:48,998 You hate them as much as I do. 309 00:14:49,577 --> 00:14:52,344 - I don't hate them. - Yes, you do. 310 00:14:52,369 --> 00:14:54,241 I knew it. 311 00:14:54,402 --> 00:14:56,012 I knew there was something else going on. 312 00:14:56,037 --> 00:14:58,082 I just didn't know it was selling drugs. 313 00:14:58,680 --> 00:15:00,682 Can you just be cool? 314 00:15:01,919 --> 00:15:03,573 I'm right. 315 00:15:03,598 --> 00:15:05,270 That's way better. 316 00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:10,186 I'm so glad you're eating healthy with me. 317 00:15:11,925 --> 00:15:13,668 I can't do anything alone. 318 00:15:14,067 --> 00:15:15,824 Glad my company is good for something. 319 00:15:15,849 --> 00:15:17,957 You're good for more than that. 320 00:15:20,893 --> 00:15:23,504 Got "Ray Donovan" all ready to go. 321 00:15:23,705 --> 00:15:25,721 - I'm hooked. - Ugh. 322 00:15:25,746 --> 00:15:27,831 His accent's for shit, though. 323 00:15:27,856 --> 00:15:29,205 Yeah. 324 00:15:30,016 --> 00:15:31,582 It's true. 325 00:15:34,550 --> 00:15:36,406 Mmm. 326 00:15:38,328 --> 00:15:41,285 Guess how much this salad cost us? 327 00:15:42,007 --> 00:15:43,787 60�. 328 00:15:44,582 --> 00:15:46,815 Well, no. 329 00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:51,099 I mean, $2.49, though? 330 00:15:51,124 --> 00:15:52,669 Plus the dressing, which we already had, 331 00:15:52,693 --> 00:15:56,626 but at a salad bar, we'd be paying 7 bucks each... 332 00:15:56,651 --> 00:15:58,435 Plus tip and tax. 333 00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:01,199 Maybe by summer, we'll save up enough 334 00:16:01,224 --> 00:16:02,617 for our own place on the Cape... 335 00:16:02,642 --> 00:16:04,851 Show off our skinny arms on the beach. 336 00:16:05,177 --> 00:16:07,745 Yeah, maybe. 337 00:16:26,612 --> 00:16:27,979 Hey, maybe tonight, we could... 338 00:16:28,004 --> 00:16:31,007 Do you mind if we don't tonight? 339 00:16:31,032 --> 00:16:34,159 Oh, yeah. Of course. 340 00:16:34,987 --> 00:16:36,343 I'm just really tired. 341 00:16:36,368 --> 00:16:38,612 Yeah, you don't have to explain. 342 00:16:38,637 --> 00:16:42,948 It's... I'm always happy just sitting here with you. 343 00:16:43,764 --> 00:16:46,432 Yeah. Me, too. 344 00:16:56,144 --> 00:16:57,244 Hey, babe. 345 00:16:57,269 --> 00:16:59,341 It's Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! 346 00:16:59,366 --> 00:17:01,987 Ugh, it's the day of rest. 347 00:17:02,178 --> 00:17:05,550 Only for lazy people like Neil who lose chili cook-offs 348 00:17:05,575 --> 00:17:07,331 'cause they rest on their Lauras. 349 00:17:07,767 --> 00:17:09,065 Rest on their what? 350 00:17:09,090 --> 00:17:11,353 Like, when you're sleeping with some chick named Laura 351 00:17:11,378 --> 00:17:12,566 and you don't want to get out of the bed, 352 00:17:12,590 --> 00:17:13,939 you're lazy. 353 00:17:15,381 --> 00:17:17,628 I learn so much being married to you. 354 00:17:17,783 --> 00:17:19,361 I love you, too, babe. 355 00:17:19,386 --> 00:17:20,831 I have to go run an errand, 356 00:17:20,856 --> 00:17:23,564 but it's for a huge surprise I have planned for ya. 357 00:17:23,589 --> 00:17:25,643 - Planned for me? - Of course. 358 00:17:25,668 --> 00:17:27,560 Well, last time you said you had something planned for me, 359 00:17:27,584 --> 00:17:29,632 you and Neil went to Rock 'N' Roll Camp. 360 00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:32,819 Who doesn't like a weekend alone? 361 00:17:34,324 --> 00:17:37,792 Now, I expect you back here this afternoon for your surprise. 362 00:17:37,817 --> 00:17:40,846 Kevin and Allison, together forevah! 363 00:17:55,518 --> 00:17:57,999 _ 364 00:18:09,959 --> 00:18:12,381 And I never called before, Terrance. 365 00:18:13,287 --> 00:18:14,865 Isn't it good that I'm out? 366 00:18:14,890 --> 00:18:18,107 I mean, I'm... I'm selling, right? 367 00:18:19,272 --> 00:18:22,492 And this is important, so... 368 00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:24,162 Hell... 369 00:18:24,187 --> 00:18:25,754 Geez. 370 00:18:29,748 --> 00:18:31,719 Oh, hell. 371 00:18:35,981 --> 00:18:37,261 Yes? 372 00:18:37,286 --> 00:18:39,897 Um, I was hoping you did walk-ins? 373 00:18:39,922 --> 00:18:41,707 Look, I said Monday, okay? 374 00:18:41,732 --> 00:18:44,272 - Why is everybody up my ass this week? - I mean it. 375 00:18:44,297 --> 00:18:46,412 I was hoping you could give me, like, 376 00:18:46,437 --> 00:18:48,537 a beachy wave or somethin'. 377 00:18:49,291 --> 00:18:50,928 You say "hoping" a lot. 378 00:18:51,310 --> 00:18:54,350 Well, it's nicer than saying "I want." 379 00:18:56,050 --> 00:18:58,982 Just a curl, not a whole wash. 380 00:18:59,537 --> 00:19:01,495 I'll take it. 381 00:19:01,978 --> 00:19:03,762 Whee! 382 00:19:03,787 --> 00:19:06,170 You got a special occasion you wanna look nice for? 383 00:19:06,195 --> 00:19:07,892 Uh, I was hop... 384 00:19:08,657 --> 00:19:10,254 I want to look nice, 385 00:19:10,279 --> 00:19:13,456 but, uh, I'm not sure it's a special occasion. 386 00:19:13,481 --> 00:19:16,042 I... Well, promise you won't tell Kevin? 387 00:19:16,277 --> 00:19:19,595 We're in that mutually-assured destruction territory now, yeah? 388 00:19:19,620 --> 00:19:20,855 Right. 389 00:19:21,518 --> 00:19:24,604 Well, uh, I am seeing an ex. 390 00:19:24,948 --> 00:19:26,329 Well, not really an ex. 391 00:19:26,354 --> 00:19:28,515 He, um... We used to bus tables together 392 00:19:28,540 --> 00:19:30,269 at this really terrible Mexican restaurant... 393 00:19:30,293 --> 00:19:31,599 Aunt Chiladas? 394 00:19:31,624 --> 00:19:33,277 No, Sloppy Jos�'s. 395 00:19:33,854 --> 00:19:35,320 Yeah. 396 00:19:35,354 --> 00:19:38,563 I guess we never actually, like, "dated." 397 00:19:38,588 --> 00:19:40,987 He was always with this girl from Amherst. 398 00:19:41,012 --> 00:19:42,956 Jenn, with two "N's." 399 00:19:42,981 --> 00:19:44,690 Mm, I hate her. 400 00:19:44,715 --> 00:19:48,553 Um, I would lock up and he would turn the sign off, 401 00:19:48,578 --> 00:19:50,841 and then we would go in back in the kitchen 402 00:19:50,866 --> 00:19:52,565 and fool around. 403 00:19:52,590 --> 00:19:54,846 And I didn't know Jenn that well, 404 00:19:54,871 --> 00:19:57,656 so it didn't seem quite as terrible. 405 00:19:58,307 --> 00:20:00,838 It just felt like I wanted to beat her. 406 00:20:01,130 --> 00:20:03,307 And it was fun and dangerous. 407 00:20:03,909 --> 00:20:05,666 Having sex in front of the tortilla chips 408 00:20:05,691 --> 00:20:07,389 is your idea of dangerous? 409 00:20:08,173 --> 00:20:10,390 Well, it's the worst thing I've ever done. 410 00:20:10,718 --> 00:20:12,167 So, you're gonna go fool around. 411 00:20:12,554 --> 00:20:13,701 No. 412 00:20:13,726 --> 00:20:15,301 Kinda sounds like you want to. 413 00:20:15,326 --> 00:20:17,676 - He's married. - You're married. 414 00:20:17,995 --> 00:20:19,280 E... Of co... Yes, of course. 415 00:20:19,305 --> 00:20:20,975 We're both married, yes. 416 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:22,867 It's not gonna happen. 417 00:20:23,881 --> 00:20:25,590 And this is what you're wearing? 418 00:20:25,896 --> 00:20:27,245 Hey. 419 00:20:28,015 --> 00:20:29,576 I'm just saying. 420 00:20:29,601 --> 00:20:31,656 You have that wrap dress from the Gap. 421 00:20:31,681 --> 00:20:34,312 Well, I'm going to go home and change, okay? 422 00:20:36,188 --> 00:20:38,168 So, what about you? 423 00:20:38,390 --> 00:20:40,429 You have fun hanging out with Kurt? 424 00:20:41,187 --> 00:20:42,514 Huh? 425 00:20:42,539 --> 00:20:44,101 Did you have fun? 426 00:20:44,652 --> 00:20:47,600 Uh, yeah. 427 00:20:47,625 --> 00:20:48,812 It was fine. 428 00:20:48,837 --> 00:20:51,143 Okay, did you go out, or...? 429 00:20:53,305 --> 00:20:55,748 - No. - Oh, okay. 430 00:20:55,773 --> 00:20:57,908 Well, that's nice. A man who can cook. 431 00:20:58,346 --> 00:21:00,172 Unless he's bad at it. Is he bad at it? 432 00:21:00,197 --> 00:21:02,451 I don't know. He... He's Kurt. 433 00:21:02,476 --> 00:21:04,176 He opened a bag of salad, put it on a plate, 434 00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:05,865 and then watched me eat it. 435 00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:09,861 Okay, well, I'd take that over being chained to Kevin 436 00:21:09,886 --> 00:21:12,633 while he makes the world's most disgusting chili. 437 00:21:16,177 --> 00:21:18,309 Kurt thinks we're eating healthy together. 438 00:21:19,994 --> 00:21:21,404 That cheeseburger I had last night 439 00:21:21,429 --> 00:21:22,985 was my third this week. 440 00:21:25,856 --> 00:21:27,597 Shut up. 441 00:21:29,236 --> 00:21:32,196 Oh, you got all done up for me, huh, sweetie? 442 00:21:32,587 --> 00:21:34,894 Really putting yourself out there, aren't ya? 443 00:21:35,051 --> 00:21:37,532 Yeah, settling in to your new profession. 444 00:21:37,862 --> 00:21:39,404 Hey, let me know if you want me to set up 445 00:21:39,428 --> 00:21:41,720 any more appointments under the bridge. 446 00:21:48,940 --> 00:21:49,955 Yes, hello. 447 00:21:49,980 --> 00:21:52,799 Um, I was just walking by Clark Street Elementary, 448 00:21:52,824 --> 00:21:54,897 and I saw a man selling drugs. 449 00:21:54,922 --> 00:21:57,549 And I followed him to the auto body on Buckingham Ave. 450 00:21:57,574 --> 00:21:59,345 He works there. 451 00:21:59,658 --> 00:22:01,426 Please help, because I don't want this monster 452 00:22:01,450 --> 00:22:03,541 getting children hooked on drugs. 453 00:22:04,552 --> 00:22:06,169 Okay, well, you're welcome. 454 00:22:06,470 --> 00:22:08,254 Thank you for your time. 455 00:22:08,279 --> 00:22:09,665 Okay, bye-bye. 456 00:22:16,612 --> 00:22:18,224 Kev, you back yet? 457 00:22:29,024 --> 00:22:31,428 Jesus Christ, Kev, come on. 458 00:22:43,038 --> 00:22:44,318 Oh, hey! 459 00:22:44,343 --> 00:22:45,866 Perfect timing! 460 00:22:46,523 --> 00:22:49,607 - Guess what I got? - A pig. 461 00:22:49,632 --> 00:22:51,271 Dinga-ding-ding! 462 00:22:51,296 --> 00:22:53,168 This is our trump card, baby! 463 00:22:53,193 --> 00:22:55,335 It's, um, staring at me. 464 00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:56,412 Can you... 465 00:22:56,437 --> 00:22:59,048 Oh, there you go. Much better. 466 00:22:59,073 --> 00:23:00,335 Peek-a-boo! 467 00:23:00,360 --> 00:23:01,646 Just kidding. 468 00:23:03,219 --> 00:23:04,612 I'm just kidding. 469 00:23:05,238 --> 00:23:07,271 Stupid Neil thinks he's gonna win 470 00:23:07,296 --> 00:23:09,707 with bird meat when I got a pig on my side! 471 00:23:10,867 --> 00:23:14,455 This is game over, right here. 472 00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,525 Certainly is for the pig. 473 00:23:16,673 --> 00:23:18,879 I'm gonna cook him as God intended... 474 00:23:18,904 --> 00:23:21,490 All night long over a roaring open flame 475 00:23:21,515 --> 00:23:23,168 10 feet from our house. 476 00:23:23,193 --> 00:23:24,683 It's gonna be a great time, babe! 477 00:23:24,708 --> 00:23:26,162 You're gonna love it. 478 00:23:27,060 --> 00:23:28,810 I'm gonna love it? 479 00:23:28,835 --> 00:23:31,582 Oh, yes. That's my surprise. 480 00:23:31,607 --> 00:23:33,506 You and me... Kevin and Allison... 481 00:23:33,531 --> 00:23:36,142 The greatest duo that this backyard has ever seen. 482 00:23:36,167 --> 00:23:37,951 We got eight hours of togetherness 483 00:23:37,976 --> 00:23:39,935 over a roasting pig. 484 00:23:40,252 --> 00:23:42,570 You want me to be here? 485 00:23:42,595 --> 00:23:44,263 I can't do this on my own! 486 00:23:44,288 --> 00:23:46,285 Not that I need anyone! 487 00:23:46,310 --> 00:23:47,529 Okay, well, all you have to do 488 00:23:47,554 --> 00:23:49,943 is just watch an open flame and try not to fall asleep, 489 00:23:49,968 --> 00:23:51,451 so w-why do you need me here? 490 00:23:51,476 --> 00:23:54,131 It's so much more than just not falling asleep. 491 00:23:54,257 --> 00:23:57,107 Neil and I... 492 00:23:58,022 --> 00:24:00,755 That neighbor guy and I 493 00:24:00,780 --> 00:24:03,240 used to do this sort of stuff all the time. 494 00:24:03,265 --> 00:24:05,398 Come on, it's gonna be the best time. 495 00:24:05,431 --> 00:24:08,204 We got an excuse to pound beers all night long. 496 00:24:08,229 --> 00:24:10,035 And then, around 3:00 A.M., 497 00:24:10,060 --> 00:24:12,896 I'll do my line-for-line reenactment of "Good Will Hunting." 498 00:24:12,921 --> 00:24:15,733 - Oh, as great as that sounds, I... - Allison. 499 00:24:15,758 --> 00:24:17,107 It's not your fault. 500 00:24:17,649 --> 00:24:19,113 Yeah, I-I know. 501 00:24:19,138 --> 00:24:20,275 It's not your fault, Allison. 502 00:24:20,299 --> 00:24:21,605 Yes. No, I understand. 503 00:24:21,630 --> 00:24:22,723 - Allison. - It's from the film. 504 00:24:22,747 --> 00:24:24,096 - It's not your fault. - Uh-huh. 505 00:24:24,121 --> 00:24:26,192 I mean, see? How great is that?! 506 00:24:26,217 --> 00:24:27,755 Where else are you gonna be? 507 00:24:27,780 --> 00:24:29,130 Well, I have a work... 508 00:24:29,155 --> 00:24:31,880 I have a work at the package store. 509 00:24:33,145 --> 00:24:34,712 I'll be here. 510 00:24:34,737 --> 00:24:36,537 Waitin' for you. 511 00:24:38,845 --> 00:24:40,340 "So will I!" 512 00:24:45,022 --> 00:24:46,372 It was his fault! 513 00:24:54,434 --> 00:24:55,947 Hey. 514 00:24:55,972 --> 00:24:57,310 Would you just hold on one second? 515 00:24:57,334 --> 00:24:58,640 Yeah, sure. 516 00:24:58,993 --> 00:25:00,386 Hey. 517 00:25:00,411 --> 00:25:01,587 - Hi. - Oh, my God. 518 00:25:01,612 --> 00:25:04,390 - Uh... - S-Sorry. Hi. 519 00:25:04,730 --> 00:25:05,941 So glad you made it. 520 00:25:05,982 --> 00:25:07,301 - Ugh. - Uh, you look great. 521 00:25:07,326 --> 00:25:09,746 Oh, thank you. 522 00:25:09,931 --> 00:25:12,621 Uh, I-I don't really know what to do. 523 00:25:12,646 --> 00:25:14,465 I've never been to one of these before. 524 00:25:14,490 --> 00:25:16,418 Oh, yeah, don't worry. It's not a big deal. 525 00:25:16,443 --> 00:25:18,753 Um, you've never been to a meeting? 526 00:25:18,778 --> 00:25:20,170 No. 527 00:25:20,195 --> 00:25:21,849 Do you think I should have? 528 00:25:21,874 --> 00:25:24,224 No. No, please. That's not what I meant. 529 00:25:24,249 --> 00:25:25,903 Um, you're the most self-controlled person 530 00:25:25,928 --> 00:25:27,059 I ever met. 531 00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:29,590 Well, it's been a while. 532 00:25:29,615 --> 00:25:31,278 Maybe I've changed. 533 00:25:31,303 --> 00:25:33,393 Totally lost it. 534 00:25:34,688 --> 00:25:38,126 Eh, I'm not buying it. 535 00:25:39,844 --> 00:25:41,830 Okay. 536 00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:44,469 Bon app�tit. 537 00:25:58,814 --> 00:26:00,604 Hey, you need the Honda this week? 538 00:26:01,808 --> 00:26:03,114 Maybe. 539 00:26:04,132 --> 00:26:05,940 I'll let you know. 540 00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,276 Oh. 541 00:26:09,724 --> 00:26:12,553 "Bon app�tit" means you can start eating. 542 00:26:14,396 --> 00:26:16,323 Uh... 543 00:26:17,677 --> 00:26:20,466 Can we please just have some real food? 544 00:26:20,491 --> 00:26:23,331 W-Wha... Thi... But this is. 545 00:26:23,356 --> 00:26:25,097 This... This is... This is protein and vegetables. 546 00:26:25,121 --> 00:26:26,301 No, Kurt. 547 00:26:26,326 --> 00:26:30,476 I would like some real-ass food, you know? 548 00:26:30,501 --> 00:26:32,145 With carbs and animal fat 549 00:26:32,170 --> 00:26:33,583 so I don't have to keep speed-eating 550 00:26:33,607 --> 00:26:35,827 alone in my car on the way over here. 551 00:26:35,852 --> 00:26:38,551 It's lonely and I'm getting heartburn. 552 00:26:39,746 --> 00:26:41,628 Yeah, o-okay. 553 00:26:41,653 --> 00:26:42,856 I'll order something. 554 00:26:42,881 --> 00:26:44,543 Thank you! 555 00:26:44,568 --> 00:26:46,971 Yes, God! Thank you! 556 00:26:46,996 --> 00:26:49,477 Ugh. 557 00:26:51,256 --> 00:26:54,303 Ooh, maybe chimichangas! 558 00:26:56,328 --> 00:26:58,722 Once again, welcome to the Sunday Trinity 559 00:26:58,747 --> 00:27:03,129 Big Book Discussion Meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. 560 00:27:03,446 --> 00:27:05,536 I've stated that I'm an alcoholic. 561 00:27:06,799 --> 00:27:09,504 Are there any other alcoholics present tonight? 562 00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:13,646 We also celebrate the anniversaries at this meeting. 563 00:27:14,328 --> 00:27:18,568 An anniversary is defined as 365 days free of alcohol 564 00:27:18,593 --> 00:27:21,770 or anything else that affects you from the neck up. 565 00:27:21,795 --> 00:27:23,599 We have one anniversary tonight, 566 00:27:23,624 --> 00:27:26,366 and that is Sam, celebrating eight years. 567 00:27:26,497 --> 00:27:28,012 Get up here, Sam. 568 00:27:39,795 --> 00:27:40,970 Hey, I'm Sam. 569 00:27:40,995 --> 00:27:42,200 Alcoholic. 570 00:27:42,225 --> 00:27:44,029 - Hi, Sam. Hi, Sam. Hi, Sam. - Hi, Sam. 571 00:27:44,054 --> 00:27:46,685 Uh, I dragged myself into the Program 572 00:27:46,710 --> 00:27:49,104 when I finally hit rock bottom. 573 00:27:49,650 --> 00:27:51,373 One night, I got so loaded 574 00:27:51,398 --> 00:27:55,435 that I stole a bundle of heroin from some guy I met at a bar... 575 00:27:55,581 --> 00:27:57,931 Too drunk to even remember his name. 576 00:27:57,956 --> 00:27:59,870 Jason, maybe? 577 00:28:00,146 --> 00:28:03,256 If he'd caught me, I bet he would've killed me. 578 00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:07,435 I can still feel that fear and that shame, and that's good. 579 00:28:07,460 --> 00:28:09,636 It keeps the cycle from starting again. 580 00:28:10,328 --> 00:28:13,435 I've been done with destructive patterns for eight years. 581 00:28:14,605 --> 00:28:16,662 I'm not going back. 582 00:28:28,803 --> 00:28:30,814 Oh. 583 00:28:30,839 --> 00:28:33,223 Um, thank you so much for having me. 584 00:28:33,248 --> 00:28:34,451 - Really? - This... Yeah. 585 00:28:34,484 --> 00:28:37,482 Uh, I know these things can be painful. 586 00:28:37,507 --> 00:28:40,512 Oddly, I'm, uh... I'm proud. 587 00:28:40,537 --> 00:28:41,903 - I... - Sam. 588 00:28:41,928 --> 00:28:42,928 - Oh, hey! - Hey. 589 00:28:42,953 --> 00:28:45,082 - What are you doing here? - Oh, I wanted to surprise you. 590 00:28:45,106 --> 00:28:46,106 Did I miss it? 591 00:28:46,131 --> 00:28:48,238 Yeah, but that's okay. There's plenty more. 592 00:28:48,263 --> 00:28:50,772 My dad was at the house looking at tile samples, 593 00:28:50,797 --> 00:28:52,334 and I lost track of time. 594 00:28:52,359 --> 00:28:53,967 - Sorry. - Eh, that's okay. 595 00:28:53,992 --> 00:28:55,428 House looks great though. 596 00:28:55,453 --> 00:28:58,282 Good. Uh, Jenn, this is Allison. 597 00:28:58,307 --> 00:28:59,570 Allison, my wife, Jenn. 598 00:28:59,595 --> 00:29:01,758 - Hi. - Hi. Oh. Hi. 599 00:29:01,783 --> 00:29:03,498 Uh, we've actually met before. 600 00:29:03,523 --> 00:29:05,865 I, uh, worked with Sam in high school. 601 00:29:06,037 --> 00:29:07,707 Oh, how sweet of you to come. 602 00:29:07,732 --> 00:29:08,920 Of course. 603 00:29:08,973 --> 00:29:11,105 It's a big deal. 604 00:29:12,538 --> 00:29:14,849 Sorry, you got, um... You have something. 605 00:29:16,303 --> 00:29:17,371 Oh. 606 00:29:20,424 --> 00:29:22,034 Is that a bean? 607 00:29:22,059 --> 00:29:23,496 A pinto bean. 608 00:29:23,521 --> 00:29:25,300 It's, uh... It's from a chili. 609 00:29:25,746 --> 00:29:27,052 Oh. 610 00:29:32,702 --> 00:29:35,512 Um, anyway... 611 00:30:09,989 --> 00:30:11,468 Hello. 612 00:30:20,247 --> 00:30:22,544 - I can't do it! - What? 613 00:30:22,926 --> 00:30:24,560 I can't hurt him! 614 00:30:24,953 --> 00:30:28,087 You cooked him over a fire all night long. 615 00:30:28,112 --> 00:30:30,281 That was different. This is murder! 616 00:30:32,210 --> 00:30:35,029 We had a totally life-changing night together. 617 00:30:35,573 --> 00:30:38,159 You and the already-dead pig? 618 00:30:38,184 --> 00:30:39,544 Don't say it like that. 619 00:30:39,569 --> 00:30:41,677 You don't know. You weren't here. 620 00:30:42,536 --> 00:30:44,029 I slept here. 621 00:30:44,824 --> 00:30:46,148 But you were late. 622 00:30:46,173 --> 00:30:47,914 You totally missed the connection I had 623 00:30:47,939 --> 00:30:49,708 with this beautiful creature. 624 00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:53,280 We talked about real big-picture stuff, you know? 625 00:30:53,305 --> 00:30:55,872 Life. Love. 626 00:30:55,912 --> 00:30:57,625 How dudes who say they don't pee in the shower 627 00:30:57,649 --> 00:30:59,194 are definitely lying. 628 00:31:00,758 --> 00:31:02,705 Do you pee in the shower? 629 00:31:03,726 --> 00:31:04,818 No. 630 00:31:05,932 --> 00:31:07,015 Look, the point is, 631 00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:09,210 there's no way that I can cut up my best friend! 632 00:31:09,235 --> 00:31:12,779 Okay... Do you think that this might possibly be about Neil? 633 00:31:12,804 --> 00:31:14,179 Of course not. 634 00:31:14,204 --> 00:31:18,107 This is about my new friend, Piggy Stardust. 635 00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,733 And worse... about how, now I'm completely screwed 636 00:31:22,758 --> 00:31:24,522 because I got no meat for the chili! 637 00:31:24,547 --> 00:31:26,733 Just give them vegetarian chili. 638 00:31:26,758 --> 00:31:30,327 Vegetarian chili is worse than no chili at all. 639 00:31:30,352 --> 00:31:32,256 Nobody wants salad soup! 640 00:31:32,632 --> 00:31:34,015 Well, then, you'll just be 641 00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,043 the laughing stock of the whole neighborhood. 642 00:31:36,986 --> 00:31:38,492 You're right. 643 00:31:38,953 --> 00:31:41,135 I won't be able to leave the house. 644 00:31:41,382 --> 00:31:42,413 That's it. 645 00:31:42,438 --> 00:31:44,030 I'm gonna become a Kermit. 646 00:31:44,937 --> 00:31:45,937 A "Kermit"? 647 00:31:45,962 --> 00:31:49,186 Yeah... someone who's alone and inside all the time. 648 00:31:49,211 --> 00:31:51,580 Like Kermit always hiding from Miss Piggy. 649 00:31:52,892 --> 00:31:55,343 This is when you feel humiliation? 650 00:31:55,368 --> 00:31:57,675 You definitely pee in our shower. 651 00:31:57,838 --> 00:32:00,061 I'm never leaving this house again, 652 00:32:00,086 --> 00:32:04,335 and you're gonna be here right by my side the whole time. 653 00:32:04,438 --> 00:32:06,290 In it till we kick it, baby! 654 00:32:06,819 --> 00:32:07,904 Lucky you. 655 00:32:07,929 --> 00:32:09,593 So lucky. 656 00:32:10,125 --> 00:32:12,523 Alright, I'm gonna go upstairs 657 00:32:12,548 --> 00:32:15,246 and stew this out over a bath. 658 00:32:18,538 --> 00:32:19,931 You're gonna have to come up in 45 659 00:32:19,956 --> 00:32:22,219 - with a beer and a sandwich. - Oh... 660 00:32:22,659 --> 00:32:24,439 Not that I need anyone! 661 00:32:41,755 --> 00:32:44,435 It's a dangerous thing, falsely accusing someone... 662 00:32:44,460 --> 00:32:46,312 Especially a guy high up in the community. 663 00:32:46,337 --> 00:32:48,035 Good job, family. 664 00:32:48,757 --> 00:32:51,814 Might as well accuse Father O'Donnell of peddling pills. 665 00:32:51,839 --> 00:32:54,812 So, please, keep in mind, if you're full of crap, 666 00:32:54,837 --> 00:32:57,187 no one would think twice about sending you to Walpole. 667 00:32:57,212 --> 00:32:59,692 And I'll tell my friends over there that you touch little kids. 668 00:33:02,415 --> 00:33:04,914 I swear on my mother's life, 669 00:33:04,939 --> 00:33:07,222 this is the guy you're looking for, okay? 670 00:33:07,247 --> 00:33:09,777 Who am I? I'm nobody. Whoever ratted me out, like... 671 00:33:09,802 --> 00:33:11,902 Listen, pal, the amount of stuff you got caught with, 672 00:33:11,927 --> 00:33:13,536 that's an intent to distribute. 673 00:33:13,561 --> 00:33:15,128 Forget intent to distribute. 674 00:33:15,153 --> 00:33:17,199 It's like Black Friday in there. 675 00:33:17,473 --> 00:33:20,161 Yeah, we'll see. 676 00:33:27,997 --> 00:33:30,163 If you have any questions, give me a call. 677 00:33:31,968 --> 00:33:33,794 Hey, buddy. 678 00:33:35,053 --> 00:33:36,069 How can I help you? 679 00:33:36,094 --> 00:33:38,780 Uh, it's Monday. 680 00:33:39,265 --> 00:33:40,818 I'm here for the generics. 681 00:33:40,843 --> 00:33:42,672 You're not supposed to call. 682 00:33:42,843 --> 00:33:44,674 I know. I know, I'm sorry. 683 00:33:44,699 --> 00:33:46,929 It was a huge mistake. It won't happen again. 684 00:33:50,991 --> 00:33:52,552 Terrance. 685 00:33:53,178 --> 00:33:54,379 Please. 686 00:33:57,992 --> 00:33:59,490 Thank you, Terrance. 687 00:33:59,515 --> 00:34:01,366 I love you, Terrance. 688 00:34:05,669 --> 00:34:09,022 - Oh. Hey. - Hey. 689 00:34:09,187 --> 00:34:11,091 Back for more Lipitor, huh? 690 00:34:12,137 --> 00:34:15,021 Maybe it's all those, uh, carbs and animal fat. 691 00:34:18,333 --> 00:34:19,691 Listen, last night, 692 00:34:19,716 --> 00:34:21,654 I think I just got confused, right? 693 00:34:21,679 --> 00:34:24,740 - Because we had... - Worcester PD! 694 00:34:25,419 --> 00:34:27,630 Everybody stay where you are. 695 00:34:28,214 --> 00:34:30,005 Sir, put your hands behind your back. 696 00:34:30,030 --> 00:34:31,597 Don't move. 697 00:34:31,826 --> 00:34:33,437 You're under arrest. 698 00:34:33,755 --> 00:34:35,474 You have the right to remain silent. 699 00:34:35,499 --> 00:34:37,232 Anything you say can and will be used... 700 00:34:43,037 --> 00:34:45,431 Well, they say witnesses can't leave 701 00:34:45,456 --> 00:34:47,896 for another 45, at least, so... 702 00:34:48,192 --> 00:34:50,296 Great. 703 00:34:51,090 --> 00:34:52,568 Oh, here. 704 00:34:52,593 --> 00:34:54,255 I'm not cold. 705 00:34:55,369 --> 00:34:56,892 Okay. 706 00:35:02,069 --> 00:35:04,095 That was insane. 707 00:35:04,928 --> 00:35:07,148 It was terrifying. 708 00:35:08,704 --> 00:35:10,485 Yeah. 709 00:35:10,517 --> 00:35:13,868 It reminded me of this one 4th of July when I was a kid. 710 00:35:14,304 --> 00:35:15,798 I couldn't have been more than 3, 711 00:35:15,823 --> 00:35:19,610 and my parents took me into town to see the fireworks. 712 00:35:20,087 --> 00:35:22,660 Dad put me up on his shoulders. 713 00:35:22,685 --> 00:35:24,252 They started up... 714 00:35:24,315 --> 00:35:26,970 These huge explosions right above us. 715 00:35:27,476 --> 00:35:29,821 I remember thinking, like, 716 00:35:30,579 --> 00:35:32,524 "The world is on fire." 717 00:35:33,579 --> 00:35:36,065 Sound hit me in my chest. 718 00:35:36,279 --> 00:35:37,976 Smoke was in my eyes. 719 00:35:38,001 --> 00:35:40,390 Everybody just laughing and smiling. 720 00:35:40,415 --> 00:35:42,884 Like, they didn't understand. 721 00:35:46,079 --> 00:35:47,845 This was the end. 722 00:35:49,011 --> 00:35:50,949 Kurt, what the hell are you doing? 723 00:35:50,974 --> 00:35:53,345 Being that close to death 724 00:35:53,370 --> 00:35:55,378 makes you think... really... 725 00:35:55,829 --> 00:35:57,677 About what's important 726 00:35:58,149 --> 00:36:00,189 and what you can't live without. 727 00:36:00,541 --> 00:36:02,368 And, Patty... 728 00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:08,649 I can't live without you a-and your chimichangas. 729 00:36:19,196 --> 00:36:21,046 Okay, it's Monday. 730 00:36:21,071 --> 00:36:22,832 Time... 731 00:36:22,872 --> 00:36:25,831 Whoa. You okay? 732 00:36:26,005 --> 00:36:27,398 Rough morning. 733 00:36:27,442 --> 00:36:30,178 Ye... Well, I guess that, but, how? 734 00:36:30,203 --> 00:36:31,552 What happened? You okay? 735 00:36:32,643 --> 00:36:35,646 Okay, what's with all the questions all the time? 736 00:36:36,079 --> 00:36:39,017 I... W... I don't ask you stuff to piss you off. 737 00:36:39,042 --> 00:36:41,752 I just want to know the answers. 738 00:36:44,991 --> 00:36:46,297 Why? 739 00:36:47,256 --> 00:36:48,867 Because... 740 00:36:49,626 --> 00:36:52,663 uh, I thought I knew your whole thing. 741 00:36:53,353 --> 00:36:56,126 We practically spent the last 10 years in the same room, 742 00:36:56,151 --> 00:36:58,321 but no one knows that I'm buying drugs, 743 00:36:58,346 --> 00:36:59,869 and I'm guessing that no one knows 744 00:36:59,894 --> 00:37:02,070 that you're selling them. 745 00:37:02,321 --> 00:37:05,310 Unless Kurt's some kind of secret drug mule. 746 00:37:07,095 --> 00:37:08,592 No. 747 00:37:09,228 --> 00:37:11,524 He has no idea. 748 00:37:16,633 --> 00:37:18,837 If he did, 749 00:37:18,862 --> 00:37:25,259 he probably wouldn't have, like, proposed. 750 00:37:26,241 --> 00:37:27,872 Wha... Ser... 751 00:37:32,048 --> 00:37:33,525 Seriously? 752 00:37:34,844 --> 00:37:36,411 Yeah. 753 00:37:36,794 --> 00:37:38,361 Ooh. 754 00:37:38,393 --> 00:37:41,704 Um, what does the ring look like? 755 00:37:41,729 --> 00:37:43,165 There was no ring. 756 00:37:43,190 --> 00:37:45,757 It was in the parking lot of the pharmacy. 757 00:37:45,782 --> 00:37:47,631 That... 758 00:37:47,656 --> 00:37:48,962 Hmm. 759 00:37:48,987 --> 00:37:50,685 Yeah, m-minutes after we were caught 760 00:37:50,710 --> 00:37:52,118 in the middle of a drug raid. 761 00:37:53,228 --> 00:37:54,794 At the pharmacy? 762 00:37:55,350 --> 00:37:56,702 Was that your... 763 00:37:56,727 --> 00:37:59,993 Yep, my friend was hauled off in a pair of handcuffs 764 00:38:00,018 --> 00:38:02,712 and my stash is in an evidence bag somewhere. 765 00:38:03,411 --> 00:38:06,384 And that's when Kurt decided to propose. 766 00:38:07,981 --> 00:38:11,415 Okay, uh, so, does that mean that y-you're... 767 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:14,179 I'm out. Dry. No pills. 768 00:38:14,204 --> 00:38:16,579 - Nothing. - God damn it. 769 00:38:17,352 --> 00:38:19,085 Well, hey, it's not my fault. 770 00:38:19,807 --> 00:38:21,779 Blame the corner-kid-asshole at the auto body 771 00:38:21,804 --> 00:38:25,545 who got arrested and gave up the area's only supplier. 772 00:38:27,341 --> 00:38:28,846 Maybe this is good. 773 00:38:29,078 --> 00:38:30,873 This whole s... Like, selling this shit... 774 00:38:30,898 --> 00:38:32,232 It's too much trouble. 775 00:38:32,257 --> 00:38:34,904 - Bu... No. - I was close to going off the rails. 776 00:38:35,275 --> 00:38:37,053 My hair's startin' to break from the stress. 777 00:38:37,078 --> 00:38:39,256 We can't give up on this. Okay? 778 00:38:39,837 --> 00:38:42,318 I-I can't deal with going home right now, 779 00:38:42,350 --> 00:38:46,603 so, um, why don't we grab a bite and... 780 00:38:46,628 --> 00:38:50,066 Real food... And just talk about it? 781 00:38:52,015 --> 00:38:53,973 I have to get home to Neil. 782 00:38:54,006 --> 00:38:55,428 When he deep-fried the turkey, 783 00:38:55,453 --> 00:38:58,369 it exploded and burnt up his arms. 784 00:38:58,568 --> 00:39:00,425 This goddamn chili. 785 00:39:00,450 --> 00:39:02,539 He didn't even make the chili. 786 00:39:02,564 --> 00:39:04,392 Just a pile of deep-fried turkey 787 00:39:04,417 --> 00:39:05,857 sittin' on the kitchen counter. 788 00:39:06,341 --> 00:39:08,951 I can smell it from downstairs. 789 00:39:12,951 --> 00:39:15,584 I think I know how to make both our lives easier. 790 00:39:18,214 --> 00:39:21,060 We just have to make them think that it's their... 791 00:39:21,085 --> 00:39:23,324 ... brilliant idea to merge ingredients. 792 00:39:24,382 --> 00:39:26,662 My lame-ass batch of vegetarian stew... 793 00:39:26,687 --> 00:39:29,037 And my gorgeous pile of manly meat. 794 00:39:29,062 --> 00:39:31,256 Into the greatest friendship chili 795 00:39:31,281 --> 00:39:32,718 this world has ever tasted. 796 00:39:32,743 --> 00:39:34,354 Well, I gotta give this a little test. 797 00:39:34,379 --> 00:39:35,705 W... No, no, no, no. Pete, I love you, 798 00:39:35,729 --> 00:39:37,233 but you smell like the pellets at a petting zoo, 799 00:39:37,257 --> 00:39:39,564 and I need you to stay five feet away from the chili. 800 00:39:40,882 --> 00:39:42,256 Well, how is that okay? 801 00:39:42,281 --> 00:39:44,139 Because it's my chili. 802 00:39:44,771 --> 00:39:46,471 I'm sorry. 803 00:39:46,514 --> 00:39:48,037 Our chili. 804 00:39:48,062 --> 00:39:49,654 I'm so glad we were both man enough to admit 805 00:39:49,678 --> 00:39:50,972 we need each other. 806 00:39:50,997 --> 00:39:53,217 - In a totally normal way. - In a totally normal way. 807 00:39:53,867 --> 00:39:56,065 You ask me, you could both do with some more time apart. 808 00:39:56,089 --> 00:39:57,193 - No. - No, no, no. 809 00:39:57,218 --> 00:39:59,998 No, he... Kevin needs a Neil. 810 00:40:00,023 --> 00:40:01,131 We've already begun planning 811 00:40:01,155 --> 00:40:02,809 to make up for the lost goofin' time. 812 00:40:02,842 --> 00:40:05,201 Yeah, water balloon fight. Then, "Ace Ventura" marathon 813 00:40:05,233 --> 00:40:07,638 followed by one of our epic games of hide and seek. 814 00:40:07,663 --> 00:40:10,350 Allison, you might not see me for the next 24 hours. 815 00:40:10,375 --> 00:40:12,333 Oh, no! 816 00:40:12,358 --> 00:40:15,146 But first, let's get this chili to the Renzulli Brothers. 817 00:40:15,171 --> 00:40:16,693 To the Kev-mobile! 818 00:40:17,170 --> 00:40:18,342 Let's go. 819 00:40:18,564 --> 00:40:21,004 - Come on. Left. - Ow. Ow. 820 00:40:21,029 --> 00:40:23,308 - Left. Keep going. - Ow! 821 00:40:27,130 --> 00:40:28,890 It's looking at me. 822 00:40:28,915 --> 00:40:30,508 Yeah, it does that. 823 00:40:32,025 --> 00:40:34,636 So, I guess they just assume you'll clean it up. 824 00:40:35,157 --> 00:40:37,289 Okay, what are we gonna do about this? 825 00:40:38,345 --> 00:40:41,295 - Chainsaw? - N... I mean the pills. 826 00:40:41,666 --> 00:40:43,929 Listen, Allison, I already told you at the salon. 827 00:40:43,954 --> 00:40:46,506 - I'm out, okay? - Patty, you don't understand. 828 00:40:46,976 --> 00:40:48,661 I need this, and you're m... 829 00:40:48,686 --> 00:40:50,937 - The only one that can help. - Okay, you know what? 830 00:40:50,962 --> 00:40:53,426 We're sharing so much now? You like answers? 831 00:40:53,451 --> 00:40:55,104 So do I. 832 00:40:55,601 --> 00:40:57,148 Why do you actually need these? 833 00:40:57,173 --> 00:40:58,783 What the hell's been going on with you? 834 00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:01,320 I just... 835 00:41:03,164 --> 00:41:05,406 I'm in a really bad place. 836 00:41:06,174 --> 00:41:08,539 The night that you told me that Kevin drained the account, 837 00:41:08,564 --> 00:41:10,164 I lost it. 838 00:41:10,984 --> 00:41:12,914 I went on a bender. 839 00:41:13,862 --> 00:41:15,961 That powder that you wiped off my face, 840 00:41:15,986 --> 00:41:19,273 that was coke... "cain". 841 00:41:19,298 --> 00:41:21,648 Ye... I know what you meant. 842 00:41:21,673 --> 00:41:23,893 Somethin' in me just snapped, 843 00:41:23,918 --> 00:41:26,906 and I made this decision. 844 00:41:28,132 --> 00:41:30,233 I don't know if I should tell you. 845 00:41:35,468 --> 00:41:41,047 Um, I got blackout drunk, and apparently, 846 00:41:41,072 --> 00:41:44,242 I stole a bunch of oxys from this guy at a bar. 847 00:41:44,267 --> 00:41:46,609 I was so drunk, I don't even remember his name. 848 00:41:46,634 --> 00:41:49,419 It was, um, Jason, maybe. 849 00:41:49,444 --> 00:41:51,476 And they must be hard to get, 850 00:41:51,501 --> 00:41:53,287 because he won't take money for them, 851 00:41:53,312 --> 00:41:56,726 and he said that I g... I'd better get more. 852 00:41:57,528 --> 00:42:00,484 Patty, I screwed up, and I'm scared. 853 00:42:01,243 --> 00:42:02,844 Please. 854 00:42:06,436 --> 00:42:09,178 Okay. I... 855 00:42:09,539 --> 00:42:11,441 I got no guarantee. 856 00:42:12,265 --> 00:42:15,278 But I may have a connection in Vermont. 857 00:42:15,609 --> 00:42:17,291 - I'll make a few phone calls. - Oh, thank you. 858 00:42:17,315 --> 00:42:18,318 Well, don't thank me yet. 859 00:42:18,343 --> 00:42:20,338 I mean, if this works, I'll go up there soon. 860 00:42:20,947 --> 00:42:22,645 But even if I get anything, 861 00:42:22,670 --> 00:42:24,829 I'm using this pipeline once, okay? 862 00:42:24,854 --> 00:42:26,188 Of course, of course. 863 00:42:26,213 --> 00:42:28,549 I'll get your stuff and enough to wean my clients off, 864 00:42:28,574 --> 00:42:30,097 and then, I'm done. 865 00:42:30,122 --> 00:42:31,602 Yes, sure. 866 00:42:32,526 --> 00:42:34,290 And I think you should come with me. 867 00:42:37,195 --> 00:42:38,761 Really? 868 00:42:40,055 --> 00:42:42,573 I need a car. You can borrow Kevin's. 869 00:42:44,101 --> 00:42:46,073 Oh. Okay. 870 00:42:46,362 --> 00:42:47,892 Yeah, okay. 871 00:42:47,917 --> 00:42:50,045 We'll... We'll go together. 872 00:42:55,150 --> 00:42:56,757 God, it smells like death out here. 873 00:42:56,790 --> 00:43:00,673 ? You always hurt ? 874 00:43:00,698 --> 00:43:04,486 ? The one you love ? 875 00:43:04,511 --> 00:43:07,511 Synced and corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com