1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,160
Okay, we give up.

2
00:00:01,500 --> 00:00:02,500
Where are you?

3
00:00:05,080 --> 00:00:06,520
Greg, we give up. Where are you?

4
00:00:07,540 --> 00:00:14,360
What are you doing in there?

5
00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:15,800
I was hiding.

6
00:00:16,420 --> 00:00:19,520
You're playing hide -and -go -seek with
a three -year -old. Is it that important

7
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,340
that you maintain your undefeated
streak?

8
00:00:23,220 --> 00:00:26,620
Let's try it again. You go over here by
the jungle gym and start to count. Mommy

9
00:00:26,620 --> 00:00:27,680
and Daddy gonna hide.

10
00:00:31,150 --> 00:00:32,409
Sneaking away for a quickie, huh?

11
00:00:34,230 --> 00:00:37,370
We're playing hide -and -go -seek.
Please, I don't need to hear what you

12
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:38,370
it.

13
00:00:38,910 --> 00:00:39,990
Hey, uh, is Jimmy around?

14
00:00:40,490 --> 00:00:42,790
Yeah. Oh, peanuts. Oh, my God.

15
00:00:43,090 --> 00:00:44,130
Oh, honey, go inside.

16
00:00:44,490 --> 00:00:46,150
Mommy and Daddy will take care of this.

17
00:00:46,750 --> 00:00:47,750
Hey.

18
00:00:48,270 --> 00:00:49,109
What's going on?

19
00:00:49,110 --> 00:00:50,710
Jimmy found some peanuts in the
backyard.

20
00:00:51,290 --> 00:00:52,750
You should have seen him run out of
here.

21
00:00:52,990 --> 00:00:56,050
And if he's that scared of peanuts, that
little guy's going to crap his pants

22
00:00:56,050 --> 00:00:57,290
the first time he sees a coconut.

23
00:00:59,650 --> 00:01:00,930
Peanuts could kill him, stupid.

24
00:01:01,150 --> 00:01:05,290
Get out of here. He's very allergic. He
could become extremely sick just from

25
00:01:05,290 --> 00:01:07,710
touching them. You're kidding me. From a
peanut?

26
00:01:09,830 --> 00:01:11,570
Well, you breed them strong, huh,
Hercules?

27
00:01:13,390 --> 00:01:17,270
It's a food allergy. There's nothing to
be ashamed of. I know, I know. I'm

28
00:01:17,270 --> 00:01:18,268
allergic to mayonnaise.

29
00:01:18,270 --> 00:01:21,670
Really? That's funny. I would have
guessed that 90, 95 % of you was

30
00:01:23,510 --> 00:01:24,950
We need to get rid of those.

31
00:01:26,110 --> 00:01:28,030
Cume, I can't touch them. I'm allergic,
too.

32
00:01:28,270 --> 00:01:31,720
I don't know. if I can touch them. We
don't know if Emily's allergic and I'm

33
00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:32,720
still breastfeeding.

34
00:01:33,080 --> 00:01:34,080
Stand back.

35
00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:36,500
On Earth, I'm a mere mortal.

36
00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:39,120
But here on Planet Geek, I'm Superwoman.

37
00:01:40,740 --> 00:01:42,580
Aha! My work here is done.

38
00:01:43,300 --> 00:01:45,360
Your yard is once again safe,
Geekonians.

39
00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:51,860
How could this happen? I am so careful
about not keeping Peanuts in the house.

40
00:01:52,340 --> 00:01:54,140
Who would leave Peanuts out here?

41
00:01:54,420 --> 00:01:55,420
What up, homies?

42
00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:58,420
Oh, Jimmy, we found some peanuts back
here. Were they yours?

43
00:01:58,820 --> 00:02:02,760
No, and I'm insulted. First of all, I
know how severe Sam's peanut allergy is,

44
00:02:02,820 --> 00:02:05,440
and secondly, when's the last time you
ever saw me misplace a snack?

45
00:02:07,140 --> 00:02:10,060
Oh, my God, you guys, look at that
squirrel. It has peanuts. He's the one

46
00:02:10,060 --> 00:02:11,060
bringing them back here.

47
00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:12,280
It was you!

48
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:15,840
Stay away from my family, you filthy
rat!

49
00:02:18,060 --> 00:02:19,100
Think it'll come back?

50
00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,780
Uh, Greg, it's a shoe, not a boomerang.

51
00:02:31,820 --> 00:02:32,638
What are you doing?

52
00:02:32,640 --> 00:02:33,640
Watching the trap.

53
00:02:33,740 --> 00:02:37,140
What? Greg bought a trap to catch the
squirrel. That thing's been out there

54
00:02:37,140 --> 00:02:38,580
every day with more peanuts.

55
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:42,400
Wow, that trap is huge.

56
00:02:42,940 --> 00:02:45,980
Hey, maybe two of them will go in there
and get to see a squirrel cage match.

57
00:02:47,980 --> 00:02:48,980
A what?

58
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,000
A cage match.

59
00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:51,560
You know, WWE.

60
00:02:54,100 --> 00:02:57,380
For God's sakes, people, put down the
books every once in a while and enjoy a

61
00:02:57,380 --> 00:02:58,380
little Smackdown.

62
00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:04,400
Oh, look at poor Sammy in there watching
TV.

63
00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:07,700
The squirrel's made him a prisoner in
his own home.

64
00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:09,620
Yeah, my aunt was the same way.

65
00:03:10,100 --> 00:03:13,700
But in her case, you know, it wasn't a
squirrel. It was an extra 500 pounds

66
00:03:13,700 --> 00:03:14,700
around her waist.

67
00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:18,140
Where do you think the squirrel's
getting the peanuts from, anyway? Well,

68
00:03:18,140 --> 00:03:20,500
don't know. We talked to all the
neighbors, and they claim they're not

69
00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:23,360
him. He could be getting them from
anywhere. The problem is he's bringing

70
00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:24,360
here in the backyard.

71
00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,400
You know, I was doing some research on
the Internet.

72
00:03:26,660 --> 00:03:30,240
Apparently, once animals find a place
they like to eat, they never leave.

73
00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:33,400
Well, you didn't have to look at the
Internet to learn that. Just go look in

74
00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:34,400
guest house.

75
00:03:36,660 --> 00:03:38,300
Well, I hope you catch him soon.

76
00:03:38,540 --> 00:03:41,420
Well, it shouldn't take long. They love
sweets, so I put a candy bar in there.

77
00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:44,440
When he goes inside to get it, the door
closes and traps him inside.

78
00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:46,900
Guess they're not that smart, are they?

79
00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:02,900
So have there been any more peanuts
today?

80
00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:07,380
Yep. We found three by the jungle gym
and a bunch of pistachios by the Chase

81
00:04:07,380 --> 00:04:10,780
Lounge. Oh, the pistachios are mine. I
don't really like them, but with Sam's

82
00:04:10,780 --> 00:04:12,480
allergy, you know, I don't have a lot to
work with.

83
00:04:13,940 --> 00:04:16,980
Where's Greg? He's hiding in the bushes
waiting for the squirrel to go into the

84
00:04:16,980 --> 00:04:17,980
trap.

85
00:04:18,399 --> 00:04:19,399
Hey,

86
00:04:21,140 --> 00:04:24,780
I got it. I got it. It's in there. The
squirrel's in there. Good for you.

87
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:29,320
You should have seen his face when the
door locked him inside. He was all, what

88
00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:31,460
the? I don't know what to do.

89
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:34,960
So what are you going to do with him
now?

90
00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:39,220
Look at his face. He's all like, what
the?

91
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:40,700
I don't know what to do.

92
00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:44,820
Put the trap in the car, drive it to
Griffith Park, and let him go. It's not

93
00:04:44,820 --> 00:04:46,120
like he's going to find his way back
here.

94
00:04:46,380 --> 00:04:48,580
I wish you would have thought of that
when Jimmy got stuck in the trap.

95
00:04:50,340 --> 00:04:53,160
Well, I don't think that trap is going
to fit in the back of your car unless

96
00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:54,039
take it apart.

97
00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:55,240
Well, here, here, put it in his back.

98
00:04:55,740 --> 00:04:58,040
What? Put the squirrel in this bag.

99
00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:04,340
You mean, like, touch him?

100
00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:08,820
Yeah, just reach your hand in, grab his
head, and put him in the bag.

101
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:11,380
Okay, can you believe this guy?

102
00:05:13,280 --> 00:05:14,300
Yeah, go ahead.

103
00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:15,640
Go ahead?

104
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,580
Go ahead, all of a sudden you're married
to the crocodile hunter?

105
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:23,640
Come on, stop being a wuss. What if it
bites me? Okay, fine, here, give me the

106
00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:24,640
bag, I'll do it.

107
00:05:25,230 --> 00:05:28,250
Great. I'm not ashamed. If Jimmy's more
of a man than me because he'll touch a

108
00:05:28,250 --> 00:05:29,770
squirrel, then fine. Jimmy's more of a
man.

109
00:05:29,990 --> 00:05:33,530
Oh, my God! I touched it! I touched it!
Take it! Take it! Put it in the car! No,

110
00:05:33,570 --> 00:05:35,230
don't put it in the car! Don't put it in
the car! Leave it!

111
00:05:42,030 --> 00:05:43,030
You know,

112
00:05:46,810 --> 00:05:52,010
I'm not gonna, uh... I'm not gonna feel
bad about being a little scared.

113
00:05:52,290 --> 00:05:53,850
You shouldn't. Uh -oh, no. You
shouldn't.

114
00:05:54,710 --> 00:05:59,070
I mean, I know it's just the squirrel,
but, you know, it's still an animal.

115
00:05:59,650 --> 00:06:01,130
A wild animal, Jimmy.

116
00:06:01,450 --> 00:06:02,450
Wild.

117
00:06:05,530 --> 00:06:09,130
And, you know, it wasn't fear talking as
much as it was adrenaline.

118
00:06:10,270 --> 00:06:13,950
Sure, I mean, when your adrenaline gets
pumping too much, that can totally look

119
00:06:13,950 --> 00:06:14,669
like fear.

120
00:06:14,670 --> 00:06:18,150
Remember when everybody went to the top
of the Washington Monument and I stayed

121
00:06:18,150 --> 00:06:19,150
down at the bottom?

122
00:06:19,290 --> 00:06:20,290
That was adrenaline.

123
00:06:26,510 --> 00:06:27,510
How come the bag isn't moving?

124
00:06:30,570 --> 00:06:31,570
I don't know.

125
00:06:34,450 --> 00:06:35,450
Think it's dead?

126
00:06:36,190 --> 00:06:37,370
I don't know. Look inside.

127
00:06:37,650 --> 00:06:39,310
I'm not looking inside. You look inside.

128
00:06:40,470 --> 00:06:41,810
Maybe it's suffocated.

129
00:06:42,290 --> 00:06:44,310
That's impossible. Look, there's a hole
in the back.

130
00:06:47,910 --> 00:06:49,790
Was there always a hole in the back?

131
00:07:18,890 --> 00:07:20,170
How it got out of the bag.

132
00:07:21,010 --> 00:07:23,510
I still don't understand how you let it
out of the car.

133
00:07:24,370 --> 00:07:25,229
Oh, really?

134
00:07:25,230 --> 00:07:28,810
Really? I like to see you alone in the
car with a squirrel, Kim. Trust me, the

135
00:07:28,810 --> 00:07:29,810
adrenaline gets pumping.

136
00:07:32,170 --> 00:07:33,170
Still shaking, honey?

137
00:07:34,670 --> 00:07:35,670
You weren't there, Christine.

138
00:07:38,530 --> 00:07:43,550
I'll never get that image out of my
mind. It's like locked up here with the

139
00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:45,150
I had to help your grandmother off the
toilet.

140
00:07:48,270 --> 00:07:52,110
Maybe it'll just go back into the trap.
It's been sitting out there for an hour.

141
00:07:52,130 --> 00:07:53,430
It knows it's a trap now.

142
00:07:53,650 --> 00:07:56,770
It's not going to be stupid enough to
get caught twice. You'd be surprised.

143
00:07:58,570 --> 00:08:00,330
You got caught in a trap twice.

144
00:08:01,810 --> 00:08:03,810
The first time I didn't know it was a
trap.

145
00:08:04,930 --> 00:08:07,630
The second time I thought I could get
the candy out fast enough.

146
00:08:10,370 --> 00:08:13,070
Well, I don't know what we're going to
do. We have no idea where it's getting

147
00:08:13,070 --> 00:08:14,750
the peanuts. We can't catch him.

148
00:08:15,510 --> 00:08:16,590
He might have to move.

149
00:08:18,170 --> 00:08:19,170
We're not moving.

150
00:08:19,790 --> 00:08:26,730
I hate to say this, but you might have
to... I think you

151
00:08:26,730 --> 00:08:30,430
might have to put a stop to this.

152
00:08:31,230 --> 00:08:33,929
I am trying to put a stop to this.

153
00:08:34,309 --> 00:08:39,130
No, I mean you have to make the problem
go away.

154
00:08:41,669 --> 00:08:43,250
Go away permanently.

155
00:08:44,010 --> 00:08:46,930
Are you saying you want me to kill it?
Oh, I didn't want to say the words kill

156
00:08:46,930 --> 00:08:50,160
it. Why, do you think I'm wearing a wire
for the squirrel police?

157
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:54,800
Look, I don't think we have any other
choice. The thing is endangering the

158
00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,580
of our son. I think you need to kill it.

159
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,600
I'm not going to kill it. You kill it.

160
00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:02,780
Come on, Greg. I mean, in today's world,
how often does a modern father get a

161
00:09:02,780 --> 00:09:04,120
chance to save his family's life?

162
00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:08,120
You know, I mean, this is your
opportunity to step up and be a man.

163
00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:10,560
This is your chance to be a hero.

164
00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:14,840
No.

165
00:09:19,530 --> 00:09:20,890
Can I go play outside?

166
00:09:21,510 --> 00:09:23,830
Oh, no, honey. The squirrel's still out
there.

167
00:09:24,190 --> 00:09:26,850
I'm sorry I'm allergic to peanuts.

168
00:09:27,190 --> 00:09:30,970
Oh, honey, it's not your fault you're
allergic to peanuts. No, it's not your

169
00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:34,510
fault at all, buddy. Come on. Why don't
you run back in there and watch a little

170
00:09:34,510 --> 00:09:35,950
more TV? We'll figure this out.

171
00:09:36,190 --> 00:09:37,210
Did you hear that?

172
00:09:37,570 --> 00:09:41,710
Did you hear that? My son wants to play
in his own backyard, and that squirrel's

173
00:09:41,710 --> 00:09:44,270
got him thinking that something's wrong
with him. All right, there you go.

174
00:09:44,390 --> 00:09:45,390
There's some fire.

175
00:09:45,530 --> 00:09:46,530
That squirrel's going down.

176
00:09:46,690 --> 00:09:49,330
How should I do it? Should I put some
poison down in the backyard?

177
00:09:50,050 --> 00:09:51,450
Yeah, Greg, that's what I want.

178
00:09:51,710 --> 00:09:55,270
To get rid of peanuts on the ground,
which are like poison to our sun, I want

179
00:09:55,270 --> 00:09:57,310
you to put down poison, which is like
poison to everyone.

180
00:09:58,430 --> 00:10:01,810
Well, what do you want me to do? Call
Acme and get some exploding acorns?

181
00:10:03,670 --> 00:10:04,609
Get a gun.

182
00:10:04,610 --> 00:10:06,190
What? Get a pellet gun.

183
00:10:06,490 --> 00:10:07,910
You need to protect your land.

184
00:10:10,860 --> 00:10:12,740
land, where are we? Little House on the
Prairie?

185
00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:16,580
No, if this were Little House on the
Prairie, we could just let that little

186
00:10:16,580 --> 00:10:18,760
blind girl run around the backyard until
she stepped on it.

187
00:10:20,580 --> 00:10:22,220
I don't want to buy a pellet gun.

188
00:10:22,460 --> 00:10:26,340
There's kids in the house. I don't want
a gun in the house. You could borrow one

189
00:10:26,340 --> 00:10:27,179
for the day.

190
00:10:27,180 --> 00:10:30,920
I could call Billy. He and I used to
hunt all the time back east. I'm sure he

191
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,580
brought some of his stuff out when he
came out here.

192
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:33,739
Well, fine.

193
00:10:33,740 --> 00:10:37,300
I mean, if that's my only option, I'll
shoot it. Call Billy and see if I can

194
00:10:37,300 --> 00:10:38,300
borrow his pellet gun.

195
00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:39,600
Oh, thank you.

196
00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:44,060
You know, this is kind of hot.

197
00:10:44,380 --> 00:10:46,020
What? You getting a gun.

198
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:51,260
You know, I never would have thought I
was this kind of woman, but it's kind of

199
00:10:51,260 --> 00:10:52,260
turning me on.

200
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:54,660
Really? Yeah.

201
00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:56,960
My man's getting a gun.

202
00:10:57,760 --> 00:11:01,220
He sure is, baby. And I'm going to pop a
cap right in that squirrel's bushy

203
00:11:01,220 --> 00:11:02,220
little ass.

204
00:11:08,490 --> 00:11:12,410
Everyone considered him a coward of the
county.

205
00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:18,710
He had never stood one single time to
prove the county wrong.

206
00:11:20,770 --> 00:11:21,830
What are you doing?

207
00:11:24,290 --> 00:11:26,110
Getting in the mood for hunting
squirrel.

208
00:11:28,350 --> 00:11:32,110
Been listening to country music, eating
beef jerky. Good thing my sister's not

209
00:11:32,110 --> 00:11:33,150
here. I'd be all over her.

210
00:11:38,190 --> 00:11:38,849
Rogers, huh?

211
00:11:38,850 --> 00:11:40,510
Yep. The Coward of the County.

212
00:11:41,070 --> 00:11:43,570
It's a song about a boy who everyone
thinks is yellow.

213
00:11:43,890 --> 00:11:45,170
And he proves them wrong.

214
00:11:45,390 --> 00:11:46,390
It's my new anthem.

215
00:11:47,270 --> 00:11:49,050
When's Billy coming over? He's on his
way.

216
00:11:49,270 --> 00:11:51,010
All right. Well, we'll be at the beach.
Good luck.

217
00:11:51,450 --> 00:11:55,350
Luck has nothing to do with it, Kim.
This classic confrontation between man

218
00:11:55,350 --> 00:11:58,510
beast is going to come down to a
Darwinian struggle for survival.

219
00:11:59,390 --> 00:12:02,690
I heard that on Behind the Music right
before Ted Nugent shot a deer in the

220
00:12:02,690 --> 00:12:03,690
face.

221
00:12:05,750 --> 00:12:07,190
You going to come to the beach with us,
Jimmy?

222
00:12:07,630 --> 00:12:08,770
No, I think I better stay here.

223
00:12:09,030 --> 00:12:11,870
Something tells me if we leave Greg here
alone with a squirrel and a gun,

224
00:12:11,910 --> 00:12:14,690
there's a 50 -50 chance we'll come home
to find the squirrel sitting on the

225
00:12:14,690 --> 00:12:15,770
couch listening to Kenny Rogers.

226
00:12:18,110 --> 00:12:22,310
Everyone considered him the coward of
the county.

227
00:12:24,070 --> 00:12:25,070
He didn't.

228
00:12:31,570 --> 00:12:35,210
Excuse me, I think you've made a
mistake. The wascally wabbit lives next

229
00:12:36,939 --> 00:12:39,080
That's funny. You see him holding a gun,
right? Sorry.

230
00:12:41,220 --> 00:12:42,440
Hey, Billy. Hey, Jim.

231
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:44,600
Want to do a little squirrel hunting,
huh?

232
00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:50,020
Yep. Ah, the gray ghost. There's three
things I know about squirrels. They're

233
00:12:50,020 --> 00:12:51,580
quick, they're crafty, and they're
delicious.

234
00:12:53,580 --> 00:12:56,760
You eat them? Oh, yeah, sure. Back home,
we used to eat them all the time. Yeah,

235
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Billy's uncle would go kill some
squirrels, catch some turtles, and then

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00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,220
cook us up some Cumberland County surf
and turf.

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00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:05,160
I'm telling you, the meat's delicious.

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00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:07,200
You got squirrel chops, squirrel mignon.

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00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:10,020
But the true delicacy is squirrel milk.

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00:13:10,220 --> 00:13:13,260
Now, it's a chore to get more than a
bottle cap full, but it is sweet as

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00:13:13,260 --> 00:13:14,260
molasses.

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00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:19,160
Wow, you brought a lot of stuff with
you. Yeah, well, I like to be prepared.

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00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:22,180
So who's shooting this thing, Jimmy, you
or me? He is.

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00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:26,800
What? Me. I mean, this is my son's life
we're talking about. I will protect my

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00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:27,800
family.

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00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:31,980
Wow, really? Okay, all right. Well, good
for you. Here, you have to put on some

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00:13:31,980 --> 00:13:32,980
camouflage.

248
00:13:33,699 --> 00:13:36,200
Also, squirrels have a very acute sense
of smell.

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00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:41,460
Rub some of this on your pulse points,
and it'll mask your human pheromones.

250
00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:45,660
This smells awful. What is it? Squirrel
pee.

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00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:54,320
Hey, hey, don't waste it. You think the
milk's hard to get? Try squeezing pee

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00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:55,320
out of them.

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00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:58,520
It's a semi -automatic pellet gun, okay?

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00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:01,840
Hey, Jimmy, remember when we used to
dare each other to take a shot in the

255
00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:02,840
with that thing? Yeah, man.

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00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:06,180
We were jackasses before jackasses had
TV shows.

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00:14:07,860 --> 00:14:09,920
So what do you look through this little
hole right here?

258
00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:12,860
Now, Greg, that's a kaleidoscope. I
bought it for your sweet 16.

259
00:14:13,220 --> 00:14:15,440
What's the matter with you? Haven't you
ever held a gun before?

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00:14:15,740 --> 00:14:19,280
Once. It was a glue gun. I burnt three
knuckles, but it didn't stop me from

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00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:20,500
finishing my pine cone wreath.

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00:14:35,210 --> 00:14:36,210
You're a bush.

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00:14:37,970 --> 00:14:40,670
This is ridiculous. We've been out here
for three hours. We haven't seen

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00:14:40,670 --> 00:14:43,850
anything. Okay, Greg, hunting is about
being patient, okay?

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00:14:44,110 --> 00:14:47,330
It's about being out in the great
outdoors, roughing it, getting in touch

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00:14:47,330 --> 00:14:50,030
the predator within, relying on your
most primitive instincts.

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00:14:50,950 --> 00:14:52,170
Oh, man, the dominoes.

268
00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:56,550
Hey, Greg, can I use your bathroom?

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00:14:56,870 --> 00:15:01,350
Sure. Thanks. You know, I like hunting
right next to the house instead of out

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00:15:01,350 --> 00:15:02,159
the woods.

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00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:04,760
I'd think a fresh roll of Charmin over a
pine cone any day.

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00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:47,320
What are you doing?

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00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:48,960
Kenny Rogers.

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00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:51,920
I'm not Kenny Rogers, but I'm the Kenny
Rogers in you.

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00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:54,200
Okay.

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00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:56,260
What are you doing here?

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00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:58,440
I'm here to help you shoot that
squirrel.

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00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:00,700
I know. I've never shot anything before.

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00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:02,500
Oh, come on. Don't be a yeller.

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00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:06,240
This is your son's life we're talking
about. You have to protect the family.

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00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:09,300
I know. I just don't. Come on, Greg.
It's time to be a man.

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00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:12,200
I know. You're right. I just don't think
I can.

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00:16:13,850 --> 00:16:18,290
Everyone considered him the coward of
the county.

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00:16:18,550 --> 00:16:22,950
He never stood one single time to prove
the county wrong.

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00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:28,030
His mama named him Greggy, but the
folks, they called him Yeller.

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00:16:28,450 --> 00:16:32,870
Something always told me they were
reading Greggy wrong.

287
00:16:33,590 --> 00:16:35,670
Thirty years of crawling.

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00:16:36,250 --> 00:16:42,690
was bottled up inside him. He wasn't
holding nothing back. He let him have it

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00:16:42,690 --> 00:16:48,310
all. When Greggy left the backyard, not
a single squirrel was standing.

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00:16:48,770 --> 00:16:53,110
He said, this one's for Sammy, as he
watched the last one fall.

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00:16:55,750 --> 00:16:59,870
I can't do it. What? Come on, I made up
the words about a squirrel and

292
00:16:59,870 --> 00:17:00,829
everything.

293
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:03,870
I know, and it was great. I just don't
think I can do it.

294
00:17:04,170 --> 00:17:05,170
Ugh.

295
00:17:05,630 --> 00:17:06,630
It's Howard.

296
00:17:10,890 --> 00:17:13,970
Right, there it is. There's the
squirrel. I know. I can't do it. You do

297
00:17:14,190 --> 00:17:16,010
Yeah, go ahead. Do it. Hurry up and do
it.

298
00:17:25,569 --> 00:17:26,569
I can't do it.

299
00:17:27,329 --> 00:17:28,329
What?

300
00:17:28,670 --> 00:17:32,650
I've never really... I've never really
shot anything before.

301
00:17:33,050 --> 00:17:36,190
But he used to go hunting all the time.
I know, but just so I could chug beer

302
00:17:36,190 --> 00:17:37,190
and paint my face.

303
00:17:38,030 --> 00:17:41,070
I mean, come on, it's the same reason I
went trick -or -treating until I was 28.

304
00:17:42,950 --> 00:17:45,950
Well, I can't do it either, so I guess
the lucky little guy's gonna live.

305
00:17:47,550 --> 00:17:48,550
Lunchtime.

306
00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:04,200
Okay, man, it's okay. It's better this
way. Sam's life was in danger. I don't

307
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,360
like it either. But that squirrel, he
had to go.

308
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:10,700
I know, I know. You're right. I mean, it
was either him or us. And I could only

309
00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:12,840
keep Sam out of the backyard for so
long.

310
00:18:13,060 --> 00:18:15,960
And plus, I'm going to feel better
knowing there's not going to be any

311
00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:17,040
What the hell?

312
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:21,020
Billy, you shot the wrong squirrel.
That's the squirrel that's been bringing

313
00:18:21,020 --> 00:18:23,440
nuts into the yard. You shot an innocent
squirrel.

314
00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:27,840
Guilty, innocent. They all taste the
same with a little mustard on them.

315
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:29,199
That's it.

316
00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:29,949
That's it.

317
00:18:29,950 --> 00:18:32,210
Now an innocent squirrel is dead because
of you.

318
00:18:33,150 --> 00:18:35,810
Enjoy your nuts in hell.

319
00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:04,760
shooting, Tex.

320
00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:07,120
My God, look, there's blood.

321
00:19:07,420 --> 00:19:10,660
Are you kidding me? You missed him by a
mile. No, I'm talking about my finger. I

322
00:19:10,660 --> 00:19:11,660
pinched it in the trigger.

323
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:23,320
It's okay, kids. The squirrel's fine.
You know, all animals shake and twitch

324
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:24,680
like that before they go to sleep.

325
00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:31,680
My God, it just ran out into the car.

326
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:36,280
He killed a squirrel.

327
00:19:36,660 --> 00:19:38,820
Kim, you didn't kill a squirrel.

328
00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:40,940
You killed the squirrel.

329
00:19:41,860 --> 00:19:44,060
Thanks to you, Sammy's safe. You're a
hero.

330
00:19:44,320 --> 00:19:48,960
Really? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I
think we've got two heroes here. Let's

331
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:51,240
not forget who scared that squirrel
under the tire.

332
00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:56,600
So you flushed him out of hiding so Kim
could finish him off.

333
00:19:56,900 --> 00:19:58,920
Yeah. Ah, good doggie.

334
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:02,460
I'm going to scrape the squirrel off the
street.

335
00:20:02,810 --> 00:20:04,830
Oh, thanks. I'll go get you a bag to put
them in.

336
00:20:05,190 --> 00:20:08,170
Oh, I don't need a bag. I'll just scoop
them right into the crockpot.

337
00:20:14,210 --> 00:20:15,210
Oh, my God.

338
00:20:15,530 --> 00:20:18,970
What is it? What is it? There's a mouse
under the sink. Stop pushing me. Well,

339
00:20:18,970 --> 00:20:21,750
go get it. I'm not going to get it. You
get it. Craig, you are the man of the

340
00:20:21,750 --> 00:20:22,910
house. Now, you have to do this.

341
00:20:26,330 --> 00:20:27,330
Go for it, Craig.

342
00:20:28,130 --> 00:20:28,929
Who are you?

343
00:20:28,930 --> 00:20:30,170
I'm the Kenny G in you.

344
00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:33,660
Kenny Rogers washed his hands of you
after that whole squirrel incident.

345
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:34,960
But don't you worry.

346
00:20:35,340 --> 00:20:36,380
I'll get you through this.

347
00:20:49,580 --> 00:20:52,580
Hey, look. The mouse is leaving on its
own. Keep playing, Kenny.

348
00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:53,880
Keep playing.