1
00:00:00,291 --> 00:00:02,291
(upbeat music)
2
00:00:04,333 --> 00:00:05,133
(grunts)
3
00:00:06,041 --> 00:00:07,171
(grunting)
4
00:00:07,250 --> 00:00:08,880
- (groaning)
- (grunts)
5
00:00:09,500 --> 00:00:11,250
Hey, hey, stop!
6
00:00:12,500 --> 00:00:13,790
(chuckling)
7
00:00:13,875 --> 00:00:16,995
- What was that?
- The Atomic Claw.
8
00:00:17,083 --> 00:00:18,043
Whoo!
9
00:00:18,125 --> 00:00:19,665
That is not a martial arts move.
10
00:00:19,750 --> 00:00:21,750
It's an appetizer at the lobster barn.
11
00:00:21,834 --> 00:00:23,714
It's a pro wrestling move, dude.
12
00:00:23,792 --> 00:00:24,712
You know who uses it?
13
00:00:25,083 --> 00:00:26,963
I'm gonna take a wild guess
and go with the wrestler
14
00:00:27,041 --> 00:00:28,631
called the Atomic Claw.
15
00:00:29,750 --> 00:00:31,210
You know wrestling's fake, right?
16
00:00:31,667 --> 00:00:32,997
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
17
00:00:33,417 --> 00:00:35,577
There is nothing fake
about the Klaus Claw, okay?
18
00:00:35,667 --> 00:00:36,877
It's 100 percent bionic
19
00:00:36,959 --> 00:00:39,789
with robotic titanium fingers
that can crush a man's skull.
20
00:00:40,875 --> 00:00:43,245
It's a catcher's mitt
wrapped in aluminum foil.
21
00:00:44,959 --> 00:00:48,039
So, uh, I guess you guys aren't going
to the Wrestle Frenzy this weekend.
22
00:00:48,750 --> 00:00:50,420
- Of course, we're going.
- We wouldn't miss it.
23
00:00:52,417 --> 00:00:53,747
Can we get back to sparring?
24
00:00:54,125 --> 00:00:54,955
Let's go.
25
00:00:55,959 --> 00:00:56,959
All right, you ready?
26
00:00:57,083 --> 00:00:58,213
Go! Nice.
27
00:00:58,291 --> 00:00:59,131
Whoa!
28
00:00:59,208 --> 00:01:01,578
(screaming)
29
00:01:01,667 --> 00:01:03,667
(in high-pitched voice)
What are you doing? Stop!
30
00:01:03,750 --> 00:01:04,580
(grunts)
31
00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,670
That is crossing the line, dude.
32
00:01:06,750 --> 00:01:09,170
You do not touch another man's ears. Ever.
33
00:01:10,083 --> 00:01:11,383
What are you guys doing?
34
00:01:11,792 --> 00:01:15,382
He gave me the Atomic Claw,
so I gave him the Russian Lobe Lock.
35
00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:17,881
Wait. So I go into my office
for ten minutes,
36
00:01:17,875 --> 00:01:19,325
and you guys just goof off?
37
00:01:19,417 --> 00:01:21,207
(sighs sharply)
Sorry, Rudy.
38
00:01:21,291 --> 00:01:23,251
We're just pumped
about Wrestle Frenzy coming to town.
39
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:25,625
What is it with you kids
and this wrestling stuff?
40
00:01:25,709 --> 00:01:28,669
If I wanted to see giant, sweaty freaks
pounding on each other,
41
00:01:28,750 --> 00:01:30,000
I'd go home for thanksgiving.
42
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:32,415
I don't need this today.
43
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,130
- What happened?
- Oh, I don't know. Let me see.
44
00:01:35,208 --> 00:01:36,878
My cat needs feline braces,
45
00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:38,879
and I had to help my mother's man friend
46
00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:41,039
because his nose was stuck
in a bowling ball.
47
00:01:42,083 --> 00:01:42,923
How do you get--
48
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,250
By playing a game
called "I Bet I Can Fit My Nose in That."
49
00:01:45,542 --> 00:01:47,542
(theme music)
50
00:01:47,625 --> 00:01:50,745
♪ Don't you get all tough with me ♪
51
00:01:50,834 --> 00:01:54,714
♪ I'm saying won't you
Come kick it with me? ♪
52
00:01:54,792 --> 00:01:57,212
♪ And we could have a ball
Run up the wall ♪
53
00:01:57,291 --> 00:01:59,211
♪ That's just how we do ♪
54
00:01:59,291 --> 00:02:01,291
♪ And no matter how much
I chop and punch ♪
55
00:02:01,375 --> 00:02:04,035
♪ It's not as cool
As kickin' it with you ♪
56
00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:06,285
♪ Here we go, let's start the party ♪
57
00:02:06,375 --> 00:02:08,075
♪ Chop it up like it's karate ♪
58
00:02:08,208 --> 00:02:09,418
♪ Everybody ♪
59
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:12,830
♪ Don't you get all tough with me ♪
60
00:02:12,917 --> 00:02:16,787
♪ I'm saying won't you
Come kick it with me? ♪
61
00:02:16,875 --> 00:02:19,455
♪ And we could have a ball
Run up the wall ♪
62
00:02:19,542 --> 00:02:21,252
♪ That's just how we do ♪
63
00:02:21,333 --> 00:02:23,293
♪ And no matter how much
I chop and punch ♪
64
00:02:23,375 --> 00:02:26,035
♪ It's not as cool
As kickin' it with you ♪
65
00:02:30,875 --> 00:02:33,035
I loved the museum.
66
00:02:33,125 --> 00:02:35,075
But the prehistoric display was lame.
67
00:02:35,166 --> 00:02:38,286
You could tell the cavemen
were just department store mannequins.
68
00:02:38,875 --> 00:02:41,705
That explains why the Neanderthals
were wearing high heels.
69
00:02:41,792 --> 00:02:43,252
(both laugh)
70
00:02:45,792 --> 00:02:46,882
(both sigh)
71
00:02:48,125 --> 00:02:50,705
Holding hands with you at the museum
is nice.
72
00:02:50,792 --> 00:02:52,042
About that,
73
00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:57,290
I was thinking it's time for us
to go to the next level.
74
00:02:58,750 --> 00:03:03,080
(stuttering)
75
00:03:03,166 --> 00:03:04,286
I think we're doing good.
76
00:03:04,709 --> 00:03:07,629
And my friend Annie told me
the next level is scary at first,
77
00:03:07,667 --> 00:03:09,577
- but then it's really fun.
- Mm-hm.
78
00:03:10,792 --> 00:03:13,712
Yeah, that's... Oh, boy.
79
00:03:13,792 --> 00:03:15,792
Am I late for my dentist thing?
80
00:03:15,875 --> 00:03:16,825
I got... Bye.
81
00:03:18,750 --> 00:03:20,750
- Milton: Oh, excuse me.
- Milton?
82
00:03:22,291 --> 00:03:23,171
Julie: Milton!
83
00:03:26,125 --> 00:03:27,165
(clears throat)
84
00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:32,674
Uh, excuse me. I was here before you.
85
00:03:34,166 --> 00:03:36,956
And now you're after me, pipsqueak.
86
00:03:38,917 --> 00:03:39,877
(chuckles)
87
00:03:42,333 --> 00:03:43,753
Hey, buddy, uh...
88
00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:45,750
I'm kind of having a tough day.
89
00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:47,334
I just wanna get my food,
90
00:03:47,417 --> 00:03:49,417
go home, put my cat in his headgear,
91
00:03:49,542 --> 00:03:51,502
and keep an eye
on my mom's boyfriend's nose.
92
00:03:52,959 --> 00:03:53,999
It's a life.
93
00:03:54,500 --> 00:03:56,130
Hey, you know what--
(grunts)
94
00:04:03,291 --> 00:04:05,331
You just made a big mistake, man.
95
00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:09,833
Rudy, what happened?
96
00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:12,827
I, I don't know. I just lost it.
97
00:04:13,375 --> 00:04:15,705
He shoved me and called me a pipsqueak.
98
00:04:16,375 --> 00:04:18,535
Don't worry, Rudy. You're not alone.
99
00:04:19,083 --> 00:04:20,463
My pip squeaks, too.
100
00:04:21,083 --> 00:04:23,633
I'm not talking about my pip with you.
101
00:04:26,625 --> 00:04:28,125
♪ Kickin' it with you ♪
102
00:04:28,417 --> 00:04:30,787
Dude, the next level.
103
00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:33,168
She's talking about kissing, bro.
104
00:04:33,250 --> 00:04:35,540
I can't. I'm not ready.
105
00:04:36,834 --> 00:04:38,254
It's not that big a deal.
106
00:04:38,583 --> 00:04:42,043
You just have to relax
and let nature take over.
107
00:04:42,500 --> 00:04:43,460
How do you know?
108
00:04:43,542 --> 00:04:46,962
The only thing you ever planted one on
was the punching dummy at the dojo.
109
00:04:48,875 --> 00:04:51,705
And I relaxed and let nature take over.
110
00:04:53,458 --> 00:04:54,918
Milton, dude.
111
00:04:55,375 --> 00:04:56,915
Your first one's important, man.
112
00:04:58,500 --> 00:05:01,670
Well, it's not technically my first one.
113
00:05:02,166 --> 00:05:04,246
Thanks for coming
to my birthday party, Cindy.
114
00:05:05,125 --> 00:05:07,125
So I guess I'll see you around.
115
00:05:11,458 --> 00:05:12,418
(gasps)
116
00:05:14,417 --> 00:05:15,287
Aunt Gerty.
117
00:05:15,375 --> 00:05:17,285
Happy birthday, darling.
118
00:05:17,417 --> 00:05:18,747
See you next year.
119
00:05:21,667 --> 00:05:22,997
(exhales sharply)
120
00:05:24,583 --> 00:05:26,583
- (smooches)
- (both groaning)
121
00:05:28,125 --> 00:05:30,875
Oh, he kissed me right on the mouth!
122
00:05:30,959 --> 00:05:33,749
No. No, it wasn't like that.
You turned into it, and I missed.
123
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:35,924
You're a twisted little boy!
124
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:37,500
The whole thing was horrible.
125
00:05:38,041 --> 00:05:41,081
I tasted her lipstick
and cough drops for three weeks.
126
00:05:41,750 --> 00:05:44,250
- (shoes squeaking)
- Guys, you are not gonna believe this.
127
00:05:44,333 --> 00:05:46,253
That wrestler Mondo Mountain is in town.
128
00:05:46,333 --> 00:05:49,293
He was in Falafel Phil's
and apparently, he met Rudy.
129
00:05:49,375 --> 00:05:50,415
- Get out of here!
- No way!
130
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,330
(grunting)
131
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:56,000
Whoa!
132
00:05:56,834 --> 00:06:01,044
Rudy says martial arts is for confidence,
discipline and honor.
133
00:06:01,667 --> 00:06:02,787
But as it turns out,
134
00:06:02,875 --> 00:06:05,165
it's also good for beating down fools.
135
00:06:08,792 --> 00:06:11,332
What's a guy gotta do
to get some up top around here?
136
00:06:14,125 --> 00:06:17,875
Rudy, Rudy, Rudy,
you have well over three million hits.
137
00:06:18,375 --> 00:06:21,205
I can't believe it.
That's more than "Man Kisses Goat."
138
00:06:21,750 --> 00:06:24,670
Hey, I didn't kiss her.
She needed mouth-to-mouth.
139
00:06:28,083 --> 00:06:31,293
Rudy, why didn't you tell us
you took down the Mountain?
140
00:06:31,375 --> 00:06:32,915
Your video's all over the internet.
141
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:34,290
Yeah, Rudy, you're famous.
142
00:06:34,417 --> 00:06:37,327
I know. Today, a woman asked me
to sign her baby.
143
00:06:37,417 --> 00:06:39,577
Do you know how much
that thing is worth now?
144
00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:43,250
(man singing Arabic)
145
00:06:43,333 --> 00:06:44,673
That's me. Hello.
146
00:06:45,625 --> 00:06:47,745
Rudy, I wasn't there,
147
00:06:47,834 --> 00:06:49,794
but you've always taught us
not to use martial arts
148
00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:51,285
unless you absolutely have to.
149
00:06:51,375 --> 00:06:52,535
Oh, no, no, I had to.
150
00:06:52,625 --> 00:06:54,415
That giant jerk cut in front of me.
151
00:06:55,583 --> 00:06:57,833
So what you're saying is sometimes,
you have to take a stand?
152
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,960
Yes. Uh, but I didn't just take a stand
for myself.
153
00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:03,580
I was taking a stand for every little guy
154
00:07:03,667 --> 00:07:07,957
that's ever been pushed around
by a fat cat or a big wig.
155
00:07:08,041 --> 00:07:09,791
Or a big fat cat in a wig.
156
00:07:09,875 --> 00:07:12,915
- Phil: Yes, yes, he'll do it.
- Or a cat with--
157
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,580
Rowdy Rudy will fight Mondo Mountain.
158
00:07:15,917 --> 00:07:17,037
Phil: Okay, ciao, baby.
159
00:07:18,542 --> 00:07:20,082
So you guys need more hummus or anything?
160
00:07:20,166 --> 00:07:21,166
Kids: Phil!
161
00:07:21,250 --> 00:07:22,460
What did you just do?
162
00:07:22,959 --> 00:07:24,789
I called the Wrestle Frenzy people
163
00:07:24,875 --> 00:07:28,325
and told them that you wanted to
get into the ring with The Mondo.
164
00:07:28,417 --> 00:07:31,707
What? No. I am not a pro wrestler.
165
00:07:32,083 --> 00:07:34,043
Don't worry. It's just a show.
166
00:07:34,125 --> 00:07:35,375
They want you to win.
167
00:07:35,458 --> 00:07:39,418
They want to see the mighty mouse
once again take down the elephant.
168
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:42,210
Phil, Phil, I...
169
00:07:42,291 --> 00:07:43,711
I don't crave the spotlight.
170
00:07:43,792 --> 00:07:46,132
- Hmm.
- I'm but a simple man
171
00:07:46,208 --> 00:07:47,748
who lives a quiet life.
172
00:07:48,291 --> 00:07:51,081
- I don't seek fame--
- They say that they will pay you $5,000.
173
00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:53,246
Mondo's going down, baby!
174
00:07:53,333 --> 00:07:54,423
(all cheer)
175
00:07:59,166 --> 00:08:02,206
Julie, you know the other day
in Falafel Phil's
176
00:08:02,291 --> 00:08:05,751
when you told me
you wanted to go to the next level?
177
00:08:05,834 --> 00:08:07,464
Yeah, I'm excited.
178
00:08:07,834 --> 00:08:08,834
Okay.
179
00:08:09,125 --> 00:08:12,075
Well, it's obviously
very important to you,
180
00:08:12,166 --> 00:08:14,456
so I think we should do it.
181
00:08:15,542 --> 00:08:17,962
Just close your eyes as I prepare myself.
182
00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:19,921
Uh...
183
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,540
Just do it. It's for the best.
184
00:08:29,959 --> 00:08:31,959
(romantic music)
185
00:08:33,041 --> 00:08:35,041
You're a twisted little boy!
186
00:08:36,250 --> 00:08:38,830
Gerty, no!
187
00:08:38,917 --> 00:08:40,917
Milton, who's Gerty?
188
00:08:43,333 --> 00:08:45,003
♪ Kickin' it with you ♪
189
00:08:45,083 --> 00:08:48,753
Step right up.
Who wants to get flipped by Rowdy Rudy
190
00:08:48,834 --> 00:08:50,584
the Internet sensation?
191
00:08:54,875 --> 00:08:55,785
Ugh!
192
00:08:56,583 --> 00:08:57,503
There you go.
193
00:08:58,208 --> 00:09:00,288
Rudy! Rudy, I need to talk to you.
194
00:09:00,375 --> 00:09:04,245
Uh, Kim, I'm kind of in the middle
of throwing people around for money here.
195
00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:08,132
Fine. I just thought I'd let you know
196
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:10,960
Jack's gonna miss class today
because he's in detention.
197
00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:13,290
What? Why?
198
00:09:13,834 --> 00:09:16,004
He got into a fight with a kid at school
and flipped him,
199
00:09:16,083 --> 00:09:17,463
just like you did to Mondo.
200
00:09:17,583 --> 00:09:20,583
What? I told you guys
to never fight at school.
201
00:09:20,667 --> 00:09:22,747
Yeah, well, the kids are saying
he went "all Rudy" on him.
202
00:09:23,458 --> 00:09:27,208
Wait, so now going "all Rudy"
means you beat someone up?
203
00:09:27,291 --> 00:09:29,291
Yeah, what did it used to mean?
204
00:09:29,375 --> 00:09:33,875
Oh, you know, losing your gym shorts
during a volleyball match.
205
00:09:37,625 --> 00:09:41,205
Rudy: Jack, where did you get the idea
that I think violence is okay?
206
00:09:41,667 --> 00:09:43,457
Oh, I don't know, "Rowdy Rudy."
207
00:09:44,875 --> 00:09:45,825
What?
208
00:09:45,917 --> 00:09:48,377
I'm just choosing a costume
for Wrestle Frenzy.
209
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,250
Look, I tell you guys all the time,
210
00:09:51,333 --> 00:09:53,383
it's never okay to fight in school.
211
00:09:53,458 --> 00:09:56,418
I saw a big guy picking on a nerd,
so I gave him a little shove.
212
00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:57,420
Did he hit the guy?
213
00:09:57,500 --> 00:09:59,630
No, but he kicked over his tuba case.
214
00:10:00,291 --> 00:10:02,171
So that made it okay for you to shove him?
215
00:10:02,250 --> 00:10:05,290
Rudy, I was just taking a stand
like you did with Mondo.
216
00:10:05,375 --> 00:10:07,745
No, no. Your situation
is completely different.
217
00:10:08,417 --> 00:10:10,127
Yeah, you're right.
218
00:10:10,458 --> 00:10:12,788
I was protecting someone
that really needed help.
219
00:10:12,875 --> 00:10:14,245
And you didn't like cutsies.
220
00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:17,883
Nobody likes cutsies.
They're worse than takesies-backsies.
221
00:10:18,667 --> 00:10:20,997
So you say one thing and do another?
222
00:10:21,458 --> 00:10:22,668
You're a hypocrite.
223
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:26,790
How dare you!
224
00:10:26,875 --> 00:10:29,665
I am your Sensei and I deserve respect.
225
00:10:31,417 --> 00:10:33,667
Oh, great. Now I got a run in my tights.
226
00:10:35,458 --> 00:10:36,628
What happened with Jack?
227
00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:39,285
He's mad because he got in a fight
at school
228
00:10:39,375 --> 00:10:41,955
and thinks it's the same as what happened
to me in Falafel Phil's.
229
00:10:42,041 --> 00:10:43,131
Well, isn't it?
230
00:10:43,208 --> 00:10:45,248
No, it's completely different.
231
00:10:45,333 --> 00:10:47,753
I mean, I was, you know...
232
00:10:47,834 --> 00:10:50,924
And he was all, you know...
233
00:10:51,834 --> 00:10:52,674
(stammers)
234
00:10:52,750 --> 00:10:54,380
Do you guys really think
I'm being a hypocrite?
235
00:10:56,375 --> 00:11:00,285
(whispering)
236
00:11:01,667 --> 00:11:02,747
Oh, yeah, totally.
237
00:11:04,834 --> 00:11:05,884
What have I done?
238
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:10,377
♪ Kickin' it with you ♪
239
00:11:11,291 --> 00:11:12,961
Ew! She turned into Gerty?
240
00:11:13,709 --> 00:11:16,499
The girl wants my lips,
but I can't give them to her.
241
00:11:16,959 --> 00:11:17,959
I have to end it.
242
00:11:18,458 --> 00:11:20,748
Oh, no, you're ending nothing.
243
00:11:21,166 --> 00:11:22,286
Julie's your first love.
244
00:11:22,375 --> 00:11:23,535
It's not fair to her.
245
00:11:24,709 --> 00:11:25,629
It's over.
246
00:11:26,291 --> 00:11:28,131
No, no, no!
247
00:11:29,917 --> 00:11:30,747
Listen, you.
248
00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:32,875
I was responsible for you two
getting together,
249
00:11:32,959 --> 00:11:35,749
and I'm not letting you break it off
over some dumb mental block.
250
00:11:36,625 --> 00:11:38,705
Kim, I appreciate your concern,
251
00:11:39,041 --> 00:11:40,331
but you're putting a lot of pressure
252
00:11:40,417 --> 00:11:42,787
on a place that my doctor thinks
may be a third nipple.
253
00:11:46,750 --> 00:11:49,330
I can help you.
Meet me at the dojo at 3:30.
254
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,460
Yeah, I've got some fruit flies in the lab
255
00:11:52,542 --> 00:11:54,882
that'll be livid if I don't show up
with a rotten plum.
256
00:11:54,959 --> 00:11:56,709
- Milton.
- 3:30 will work.
257
00:11:59,417 --> 00:12:01,417
(upbeat music)
258
00:12:07,583 --> 00:12:09,883
- I got your text, Rudy. What's up?
- (thudding)
259
00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:12,705
Jack, I've made some mistakes in my life.
260
00:12:12,792 --> 00:12:15,672
Sushi flavored toothpaste, pet toupees.
261
00:12:15,750 --> 00:12:17,580
Don't forget "man-ty" hose.
262
00:12:17,667 --> 00:12:20,577
No, no, that was a great idea.
Just a bad name.
263
00:12:20,667 --> 00:12:22,747
I should have called them
"Stockings for Dudes."
264
00:12:24,125 --> 00:12:25,125
What do you want, Rudy?
265
00:12:25,959 --> 00:12:27,459
I wanted to apologize, Jack.
266
00:12:28,875 --> 00:12:29,705
Look.
267
00:12:31,166 --> 00:12:32,246
You were right.
268
00:12:32,333 --> 00:12:33,793
I was being a hypocrite.
269
00:12:33,875 --> 00:12:36,245
Fighting should always be the last resort.
270
00:12:37,208 --> 00:12:38,168
Thanks, Rudy.
271
00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:41,330
Wait, why did I have to come down here
for you to tell me that?
272
00:12:41,417 --> 00:12:43,037
'Cause I'm gonna make things right.
273
00:12:43,959 --> 00:12:45,129
Mondo!
274
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:49,627
What do you want?
275
00:12:50,125 --> 00:12:51,415
I have a proposal.
276
00:12:51,792 --> 00:12:54,962
We both know this match tomorrow is fake
and nobody's gonna get hurt.
277
00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:58,075
I'm supposed to win,
but I want you to win instead.
278
00:12:58,834 --> 00:13:00,254
Why do you wanna do that?
279
00:13:00,333 --> 00:13:02,133
'Cause I crossed the line the other day.
280
00:13:02,542 --> 00:13:04,632
Phil's food is not worth fighting over.
281
00:13:05,166 --> 00:13:07,076
You know, it's a bad sign
when you walk in the bathroom
282
00:13:07,166 --> 00:13:09,076
and see a cockroach
throwing up in the toilet.
283
00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:14,038
You made me look like an idiot
on the internet.
284
00:13:14,875 --> 00:13:16,455
My rabbi saw that!
285
00:13:17,166 --> 00:13:18,456
I'm sorry about everything.
286
00:13:18,875 --> 00:13:21,375
I embarrassed you
and I sent a bad message to my students.
287
00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:24,714
If that's what you want,
then that's what we'll do.
288
00:13:27,375 --> 00:13:28,705
That's pretty cool, Rudy.
289
00:13:29,250 --> 00:13:31,750
Oh, uh, let's not ruin the show
for the guys.
290
00:13:31,834 --> 00:13:33,214
We'll just keep this our secret.
291
00:13:33,250 --> 00:13:35,420
You mean like how you wax your chest
every Wednesday night?
292
00:13:36,083 --> 00:13:38,213
Wait. How'd you know about that?
293
00:13:38,667 --> 00:13:41,957
It's a combination of the screams
and the way the toilet backs up
294
00:13:42,041 --> 00:13:43,581
'cause it's full of wax and hair.
295
00:13:45,417 --> 00:13:46,877
We'll see you tomorrow, Mondo.
296
00:13:46,875 --> 00:13:48,075
Let's give 'em a good show.
297
00:13:48,166 --> 00:13:49,286
Okay.
298
00:13:50,291 --> 00:13:52,211
Oh, it's gonna be a good show.
299
00:13:52,667 --> 00:13:55,417
I'm gonna rip off his face
and show it to his butt.
300
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:56,880
(laughs)
301
00:13:57,709 --> 00:13:58,749
That doesn't make any sense.
302
00:13:58,834 --> 00:14:00,004
- Shut it!
- (grunts)
303
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,630
♪ Kickin' it with you ♪
304
00:14:06,417 --> 00:14:07,377
I can't do it.
305
00:14:07,458 --> 00:14:08,918
- You can do it.
- I can't.
306
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,380
It's just a picture.
307
00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:12,498
Every time I pucker, I see Gerty.
308
00:14:13,166 --> 00:14:15,456
- It's hopeless.
- It's not hopeless.
309
00:14:15,542 --> 00:14:18,632
We'll just take it slowly,
like, uh, getting into a hot tub.
310
00:14:19,083 --> 00:14:20,463
I don't get into hot tubs.
311
00:14:20,542 --> 00:14:22,632
They're bubbling cauldrons of bacteria.
312
00:14:23,291 --> 00:14:25,291
For the love of... it's just a stupid...
313
00:14:25,375 --> 00:14:26,325
(smooches)
314
00:14:28,291 --> 00:14:30,501
Oh, wow, what did we just do?
315
00:14:32,750 --> 00:14:35,790
Milton David Krupnick, you and Kim?
316
00:14:36,291 --> 00:14:38,251
Uh, no, Julie,
I think you have the wrong...
317
00:14:38,333 --> 00:14:39,173
(Kim screams)
318
00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:43,710
Julie, no, Kim was just kissing me
to see if I'd like it.
319
00:14:43,792 --> 00:14:44,632
And I did.
320
00:14:44,709 --> 00:14:46,039
- (screaming)
- (grunts)
321
00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:49,080
No, no, no, Julie,
it's not what you think, okay?
322
00:14:49,542 --> 00:14:51,792
Milton was nervous because he knew
you wanted to kiss him,
323
00:14:51,875 --> 00:14:54,165
and he wanted your first kiss
to be perfect.
324
00:14:54,417 --> 00:14:55,377
(sighs)
325
00:14:55,458 --> 00:14:58,918
Yes, and I didn't wanna ruin things
by vomiting on your shoes.
326
00:15:00,458 --> 00:15:02,038
This was never about me, Julie.
327
00:15:02,875 --> 00:15:04,745
This was all about you.
328
00:15:07,667 --> 00:15:11,287
Milton, where did you get the idea
that I wanted you to kiss me?
329
00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:14,035
You said you wanted to go
to the next level.
330
00:15:14,125 --> 00:15:16,995
I was talking
about the upper level of the museum.
331
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:19,003
What?
332
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:22,080
But you said it would be scary at first,
333
00:15:22,166 --> 00:15:23,326
and then it would be fun.
334
00:15:23,417 --> 00:15:25,577
Yeah, because after you get off
the elevator,
335
00:15:25,667 --> 00:15:27,537
the first thing you see
is the mummy exhibit.
336
00:15:27,625 --> 00:15:29,455
- (sighs sharply)
- Julie: But if you keep going,
337
00:15:29,542 --> 00:15:32,792
there's a simulator that lets you travel
through the human digestive tract.
338
00:15:33,709 --> 00:15:35,079
I heard about that.
339
00:15:35,500 --> 00:15:39,670
It's a magical journey
from mastication to evacuation.
340
00:15:40,750 --> 00:15:42,960
That's one wild ride
I wanna take with you.
341
00:15:45,375 --> 00:15:46,745
Oh, Milton.
342
00:15:47,458 --> 00:15:50,668
And about the other thing,
we don't need to rush.
343
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:52,540
When we're ready, it'll happen.
344
00:15:53,458 --> 00:15:54,628
Thanks, Julie.
345
00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:56,880
Let's go get a smoothie.
346
00:15:57,667 --> 00:15:58,787
Just, just a second.
347
00:16:01,458 --> 00:16:03,628
Kim, thanks for helping Milton.
348
00:16:04,166 --> 00:16:05,746
I know you're a black belt...
349
00:16:07,125 --> 00:16:10,125
but if your lips get anywhere
near my man ever again,
350
00:16:10,208 --> 00:16:11,788
I will end you, sister.
351
00:16:13,750 --> 00:16:14,960
Got it.
(nervous chuckle)
352
00:16:15,792 --> 00:16:16,712
Bye-bye.
353
00:16:19,041 --> 00:16:20,581
♪ Kickin' it with you ♪
354
00:16:22,709 --> 00:16:23,829
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen,
355
00:16:23,959 --> 00:16:25,629
welcome to the Seaford Rec Center
356
00:16:25,709 --> 00:16:28,209
where Wrestle Frenzy is well underway.
357
00:16:30,458 --> 00:16:32,628
Oh, this is disgusting.
358
00:16:32,709 --> 00:16:34,539
These guys are sweating all over us.
359
00:16:34,625 --> 00:16:37,375
I know. Rudy got us
the greatest seats ever.
360
00:16:38,875 --> 00:16:39,955
Eddie: Check it out.
361
00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:42,500
I caught one of his teeth in my snow cone.
362
00:16:44,083 --> 00:16:44,963
(bell rings)
363
00:16:45,083 --> 00:16:46,963
(crowd cheering)
364
00:16:47,917 --> 00:16:49,747
Hello, everybody, I'm Jason Sehorn.
365
00:16:51,542 --> 00:16:53,582
And I used to play in the NFL,
366
00:16:53,667 --> 00:16:55,327
and now I'm here
367
00:16:55,417 --> 00:16:58,627
as your celebrity wrestling announcer
in Seafood.
368
00:16:58,709 --> 00:17:00,629
- Seaford!
- Don't care.
369
00:17:02,041 --> 00:17:03,581
And now into the ring,
370
00:17:03,917 --> 00:17:07,417
he's mad, he's mean, he's Mondo Mountain!
371
00:17:07,875 --> 00:17:09,875
(crowd booing)
372
00:17:16,792 --> 00:17:19,882
The Internet phenomenon,
the mighty mouse that roared,
373
00:17:20,291 --> 00:17:22,291
the Sensei sensation,
374
00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:24,792
Rowdy Rudy!
375
00:17:25,583 --> 00:17:27,543
(crowd cheering)
376
00:17:31,458 --> 00:17:35,748
That's right. Rowdy Rudy is here
to bring the pain, baby.
377
00:17:37,417 --> 00:17:39,537
Oh! My bad. My bad.
378
00:17:39,625 --> 00:17:40,825
Walk it off. Walk it off.
379
00:17:42,542 --> 00:17:44,462
Hey, so I've seen these things.
380
00:17:44,542 --> 00:17:46,332
I think we should do a little smack talk.
381
00:17:46,417 --> 00:17:49,207
I'm gonna say something about your mama
that I in no way mean.
382
00:17:49,875 --> 00:17:51,625
Your mama is so big--
383
00:17:51,709 --> 00:17:52,999
(Mondo grunting)
384
00:17:54,667 --> 00:17:55,497
(groans)
385
00:17:57,041 --> 00:17:58,631
(indistinct chatter)
386
00:17:58,709 --> 00:17:59,879
Rudy: Mondo, buddy.
387
00:18:00,542 --> 00:18:01,462
I kind of felt that one.
388
00:18:01,542 --> 00:18:03,002
Maybe we can lighten it up a little bit.
389
00:18:03,458 --> 00:18:04,578
- I'm sorry.
- (groans)
390
00:18:04,667 --> 00:18:05,707
- Oh!
- (gasps)
391
00:18:06,542 --> 00:18:08,132
- How was that?
- Not good.
392
00:18:08,208 --> 00:18:09,878
I think I just peed into my lungs.
393
00:18:10,166 --> 00:18:11,076
(Mondo grunts)
394
00:18:11,709 --> 00:18:12,789
Crowd: Oh!
395
00:18:13,583 --> 00:18:15,963
I knew I shouldn't have kept my car keys
in my pocket.
396
00:18:16,750 --> 00:18:18,580
And that can opener, that was just stupid.
397
00:18:19,208 --> 00:18:20,038
(grunts)
398
00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:21,670
(straining)
399
00:18:21,750 --> 00:18:22,920
Come on, Mondo!
400
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,750
Rip his leg off and kick him with it.
401
00:18:24,750 --> 00:18:25,580
(Mondo screaming)
402
00:18:25,667 --> 00:18:27,207
- I heard that, Jerry.
- Sorry, Rudy.
403
00:18:27,625 --> 00:18:28,915
Ow!
404
00:18:29,750 --> 00:18:31,790
I'd really appreciate it
if you'd stop that.
405
00:18:32,625 --> 00:18:33,955
I really don't bend that way!
406
00:18:37,291 --> 00:18:39,131
(indistinct chatter)
407
00:18:42,875 --> 00:18:46,625
No!
408
00:18:49,542 --> 00:18:50,882
All: Oh!
409
00:18:52,041 --> 00:18:55,001
But, mommy,
I don't wanna go to school today.
410
00:18:57,250 --> 00:18:59,000
Guys, something's not right.
411
00:18:59,375 --> 00:19:01,745
This is what you get for embarrassing me.
412
00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:05,002
Oh, Mongo, now!
413
00:19:05,083 --> 00:19:07,293
Mondo's brother Mongo
is coming from the locker room.
414
00:19:07,959 --> 00:19:08,829
(Rudy groaning)
415
00:19:11,125 --> 00:19:13,165
(crowd jeering)
416
00:19:13,709 --> 00:19:14,829
Crowd: Oh!
417
00:19:17,250 --> 00:19:18,080
Mondo: Whoo!
418
00:19:18,166 --> 00:19:18,996
All right, Rudy.
419
00:19:19,458 --> 00:19:20,378
We got this.
420
00:19:20,875 --> 00:19:22,165
(grunting)
421
00:19:25,208 --> 00:19:26,208
(groans)
422
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:28,133
(Mondo screaming)
423
00:19:30,583 --> 00:19:31,633
(grunting)
424
00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:36,330
(Mongo grunts)
425
00:19:37,458 --> 00:19:39,288
- (groaning)
- (grunting)
426
00:19:41,375 --> 00:19:43,075
(grunts)
Huh?
427
00:19:49,166 --> 00:19:50,416
(bell rings)
428
00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:52,330
(crowd cheering)
429
00:19:54,583 --> 00:19:55,423
Thanks, Jack.
430
00:19:55,500 --> 00:19:56,540
You saved me.
431
00:19:56,875 --> 00:19:58,875
Sometimes, you do have
to take a stand, Rudy.
432
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:02,460
And the winner is Rowdy Rudy!
433
00:20:02,542 --> 00:20:03,792
(crowd cheering)
434
00:20:03,875 --> 00:20:06,455
Uh, people, people,
I have something to say.
435
00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:07,674
All right?
436
00:20:07,750 --> 00:20:09,630
If you have a disagreement with someone,
437
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,169
try to work it out
without resorting to violence.
438
00:20:12,291 --> 00:20:14,631
Violence is never the answer.
439
00:20:14,709 --> 00:20:17,079
- All: Yeah!
- Violence rocks!
440
00:20:17,166 --> 00:20:18,206
Men: Yeah!
441
00:20:18,291 --> 00:20:19,671
No, no, no, violence is bad.
442
00:20:19,750 --> 00:20:21,880
It only leads to more violence.
443
00:20:21,959 --> 00:20:22,789
All: Yeah!
444
00:20:22,875 --> 00:20:24,995
Good. We love violence!
445
00:20:25,083 --> 00:20:26,213
(cheering)
446
00:20:27,041 --> 00:20:29,211
No, no. Peace is the answer.
447
00:20:29,583 --> 00:20:33,383
Oh! That's it! I saw who threw that.
I'm going all Rudy on you!
448
00:20:33,458 --> 00:20:35,498
(clamoring)
449
00:20:36,959 --> 00:20:39,879
Oh, this Internet dating
has been so good to us, huh?
450
00:20:40,583 --> 00:20:43,673
Today's the day that
we have been together for three months.
451
00:20:44,542 --> 00:20:47,962
And I was thinking it's time for the kiss.
452
00:20:52,291 --> 00:20:53,251
Oh, Phil.
453
00:20:54,291 --> 00:20:55,961
I didn't see this coming.
454
00:20:58,041 --> 00:21:01,541
All right, just close your eyes
while I get ready.
455
00:21:01,625 --> 00:21:02,665
Okay.
456
00:21:08,709 --> 00:21:09,669
All right.
457
00:21:10,667 --> 00:21:12,497
- I'm ready.
- Phil: Okay.
458
00:21:13,208 --> 00:21:14,128
(clears throat)
459
00:21:17,166 --> 00:21:18,076
Milton!
460
00:21:18,834 --> 00:21:21,884
That twisted little boy has ruined me.
461
00:21:21,875 --> 00:21:23,415
Gah!
(cries)
462
00:21:24,250 --> 00:21:26,750
Oh, I thought we were having moment
of good times.
463
00:21:26,834 --> 00:21:29,134
Come back, Gerty. Gerty, come back!
464
00:21:29,208 --> 00:21:31,538
Why?
(cries)
465
00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:35,250
(closing theme music)
466
00:21:56,750 --> 00:21:57,880
Man: Poor soul.
467
00:21:57,875 --> 00:21:58,995
(dog snarls, barks)