1
00:00:02,144 --> 00:00:03,745
Hey, Grover, we're almost there.
2
00:00:03,746 --> 00:00:05,513
Check out our new neighborhood.
3
00:00:05,514 --> 00:00:07,382
I guess it looks cool.
4
00:00:07,383 --> 00:00:09,183
I'll tell Grammy how nice it is
5
00:00:09,184 --> 00:00:11,119
so she won't be worried we moved.
6
00:00:11,120 --> 00:00:13,788
Aw, did Grammy tell you
she was worried?
7
00:00:13,789 --> 00:00:16,925
She said she wishes we didn't
have to live so far away.
8
00:00:16,926 --> 00:00:18,760
Aw.
9
00:00:18,761 --> 00:00:20,194
She also wishes we weren't moving
10
00:00:20,195 --> 00:00:21,561
to a black neighborhood.
11
00:00:23,866 --> 00:00:27,101
- I am really gonna miss your mom.
- Okay.
12
00:00:27,102 --> 00:00:29,704
Buddy, I-I wouldn't call it
a black neighborhood.
13
00:00:29,705 --> 00:00:33,274
Really? He's black. He's black.
14
00:00:33,275 --> 00:00:34,642
She's black.
15
00:00:34,643 --> 00:00:36,911
Would you look at over there?
That's a palm tree.
16
00:00:36,912 --> 00:00:38,979
Oh, yeah, right next
to that black guy.
17
00:00:40,482 --> 00:00:41,916
All right, son.
18
00:00:41,917 --> 00:00:43,818
It's time to set up for Yardecue Day.
19
00:00:43,819 --> 00:00:46,721
Got to get the tables, fire up
the smoker, and prep the meats.
20
00:00:46,722 --> 00:00:48,890
Yeah, that sounds like a whole lot.
21
00:00:48,891 --> 00:00:50,157
You'd better get busy.
22
00:00:51,293 --> 00:00:53,561
What is so important on this phone?
23
00:00:53,562 --> 00:00:55,563
I know it's not looking for a job.
24
00:00:55,564 --> 00:00:58,433
It's a video talking about evolution.
25
00:00:58,434 --> 00:01:00,268
It says the number one key to survival
26
00:01:00,269 --> 00:01:01,936
is being able to adapt to change.
27
00:01:01,937 --> 00:01:04,305
Hmm. You know, the number
one key to your survival
28
00:01:04,306 --> 00:01:06,841
is getting your butt up and
helping me stack some wood.
29
00:01:06,842 --> 00:01:09,277
Hey, hey, Pop, look.
30
00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:12,146
I hate stacking that wood, man.
There's always spiders.
31
00:01:12,147 --> 00:01:14,948
(LAUGHS): Exactly. That's
why you're stacking the wood.
32
00:01:16,018 --> 00:01:19,487
Six, seven, eight...
33
00:01:19,488 --> 00:01:21,822
Sweetie, please stop
counting black people.
34
00:01:23,359 --> 00:01:26,661
Okay, just because there's
more diversity here
35
00:01:26,662 --> 00:01:28,529
doesn't mean we won't get along
with everyone.
36
00:01:28,530 --> 00:01:30,131
Inside of all these homes
37
00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:32,166
are people and families
that are just like us.
38
00:01:32,167 --> 00:01:33,768
Plus, my new school
where you're gonna go
39
00:01:33,769 --> 00:01:35,370
is super close by.
40
00:01:35,371 --> 00:01:37,705
Yes, and that's another reason
why we chose this house.
41
00:01:37,706 --> 00:01:38,518
Mm-hmm.
42
00:01:38,519 --> 00:01:40,975
Grammy says that it was the only
house that we could afford.
43
00:01:40,976 --> 00:01:42,809
(SIGHS)
Wow, it's like she's still here.
44
00:01:50,886 --> 00:01:52,720
(SCREAMS) A spider is on me!
45
00:01:52,721 --> 00:01:54,355
It got me! (LAUGHS)
46
00:01:54,356 --> 00:01:56,324
It's not funny, man.
47
00:01:56,325 --> 00:01:59,127
You know, you are extra
annoying on Yardecue Day.
48
00:01:59,128 --> 00:02:01,896
Son, how can you have
such a bad attitude
49
00:02:01,897 --> 00:02:03,564
on a day like today?
50
00:02:03,565 --> 00:02:06,534
Yardecue Day is about bringing
our community together
51
00:02:06,535 --> 00:02:09,337
to celebrate what makes
this neighborhood special.
52
00:02:09,338 --> 00:02:11,404
- Which is?
- Me.
53
00:02:13,375 --> 00:02:15,376
Seriously, son,
54
00:02:15,377 --> 00:02:17,512
our family's been in this
neighborhood for generations,
55
00:02:17,513 --> 00:02:19,347
and the culture
that we helped to create
56
00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:21,215
is worthy of respect.
57
00:02:21,216 --> 00:02:24,485
Now you watch the firebox while
I go in and season the meat.
58
00:02:24,486 --> 00:02:27,889
Oh, boy, you mean I actually
get to touch the smoker?
59
00:02:27,890 --> 00:02:29,657
No, you don't get to touch the smoker.
60
00:02:29,658 --> 00:02:31,858
I said watch the smoker.
Don't touch the smoker.
61
00:02:33,262 --> 00:02:36,064
I'm the only one touches the smoker.
62
00:02:36,065 --> 00:02:38,666
Man, I hate Yardecue Day.
63
00:02:38,667 --> 00:02:40,367
(TIRES SCREECH)
64
00:02:43,072 --> 00:02:45,173
Hey, we're your new neighbors,
the Johnsons.
65
00:02:45,174 --> 00:02:46,708
Dave, hurry. He needs to pee.
66
00:02:46,709 --> 00:02:49,877
I'm sorry. Long drive, big soda.
67
00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:51,311
I'm coming, hold on.
68
00:02:52,715 --> 00:02:55,482
Hey, look,
our neighbor's diverse, too.
69
00:02:59,055 --> 00:03:02,394
Although maybe today's gonna
be more fun than I thought.
70
00:03:03,859 --> 00:03:05,793
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
71
00:03:05,794 --> 00:03:07,060
♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪
72
00:03:09,702 --> 00:03:11,036
Hey, Ma.
73
00:03:11,037 --> 00:03:12,905
Hey. I heard tires screech.
74
00:03:12,906 --> 00:03:16,008
I hate it when those gangbangers
tear up the street.
75
00:03:16,009 --> 00:03:17,543
You know, I saw them.
76
00:03:17,544 --> 00:03:20,679
Uh, I'm not too sure what gang
they would be a part of.
77
00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:22,047
Oh, really? Well, who was it, then?
78
00:03:22,048 --> 00:03:23,315
Oh, it's the new neighbors.
79
00:03:23,316 --> 00:03:25,417
Says their names are the Johnsons.
80
00:03:25,418 --> 00:03:26,418
- Johnsons?
- Hmm.
81
00:03:26,419 --> 00:03:28,854
- Well, all right.
- Yeah.
82
00:03:28,855 --> 00:03:31,643
It is good to hear another
successful black family
83
00:03:31,644 --> 00:03:33,245
moving into that nice house.
84
00:03:33,246 --> 00:03:34,646
You know, keeping the neighborhood
85
00:03:34,647 --> 00:03:36,214
headed in a positive direction.
86
00:03:36,215 --> 00:03:39,217
(LAUGHS): I'm so glad
to hear you say that.
87
00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:40,585
Calvin, how about we go over there
88
00:03:40,586 --> 00:03:42,721
and invite them to Yardecue Day.
89
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:44,489
- You know what, that's a good idea.
- Mm-hmm.
90
00:03:44,490 --> 00:03:46,857
I think that is a great idea.
91
00:03:49,862 --> 00:03:51,163
How I look, baby?
92
00:03:51,164 --> 00:03:53,165
Mmm, as handsome as ever, baby.
93
00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:54,766
(BOTH CHUCKLE) Hey there.
94
00:03:54,767 --> 00:03:56,767
(CHUCKLES) Hello.
95
00:03:59,172 --> 00:04:01,673
Uh, we're-we're looking
for the Johnsons.
96
00:04:01,674 --> 00:04:04,775
Well, you found 'em.
Dave Johnson. Nice to meet you.
97
00:04:05,611 --> 00:04:06,845
Take a step back
98
00:04:06,846 --> 00:04:08,747
so I can see the handshake.
99
00:04:08,748 --> 00:04:10,348
Uh, nice to meet you, too.
100
00:04:10,349 --> 00:04:13,218
I'm Tina. This is my husband
Calvin. We're the Butlers.
101
00:04:13,219 --> 00:04:14,920
Oh, great, 'cause I rang for some tea
102
00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:16,221
about a half hour ago.
103
00:04:16,222 --> 00:04:17,956
(LAUGHS)
104
00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:19,858
- What the...?
- Actually, we're your new neighbors.
105
00:04:19,859 --> 00:04:22,794
And we live right next door.
106
00:04:22,795 --> 00:04:24,056
Oh, no way. This is
you guys right here?
107
00:04:24,057 --> 00:04:26,631
- Uh-huh.
- It's so nice to meet you.
108
00:04:26,632 --> 00:04:28,172
(STAMMERS) So, your name is Johnson?
109
00:04:28,701 --> 00:04:31,036
Like-like Magic Johnson,
Dwayne Johnson?
110
00:04:31,037 --> 00:04:33,205
All the other black Johnsons?
111
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,606
Oh, yeah.
112
00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:36,241
And like Magic Johnson,
I'm from Michigan,
113
00:04:36,242 --> 00:04:39,077
and like Dwayne Johnson,
I rock. (LAUGHS)
114
00:04:39,078 --> 00:04:41,745
(LAUGHING): That's pretty f...
115
00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:45,512
That's a pretty serious
smoker you got there.
116
00:04:45,513 --> 00:04:46,318
Oh, yeah.
117
00:04:46,319 --> 00:04:47,819
Calvin built it himself.
118
00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:49,454
We own an auto repair shop.
119
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:50,889
Calvin's really good with tools.
120
00:04:50,890 --> 00:04:52,757
Oh, that's so cool.
I love to barbecue.
121
00:04:52,758 --> 00:04:54,125
What kind of wood do you use?
122
00:04:54,126 --> 00:04:57,095
Hickory. Little mixture
of oak and pecan.
123
00:04:57,096 --> 00:04:59,231
Wow. I'd love to try that someday.
124
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:01,099
- I bet you would.
- Why don't you, uh...
125
00:05:01,100 --> 00:05:02,801
come by later.
126
00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:05,136
A bunch of people from the
neighborhood are gonna stop by.
127
00:05:05,137 --> 00:05:06,938
Ooh. You know,
I don't know that we can.
128
00:05:06,939 --> 00:05:08,640
The movers should be here any minute.
129
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,408
Aw, just come by for a bit.
130
00:05:10,409 --> 00:05:12,611
In this neighborhood,
we believe in hospitality.
131
00:05:12,612 --> 00:05:15,480
- Right?
- But we also believe in privacy,
132
00:05:15,481 --> 00:05:18,250
so, you know, do what you
got to do. You know. Hey.
133
00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:19,788
Okay, well, we'll try to
make it over for a plate.
134
00:05:19,789 --> 00:05:20,706
- Well, all right.
- Okay.
135
00:05:20,707 --> 00:05:21,786
It was so nice to meet you guys.
136
00:05:21,787 --> 00:05:23,021
- Yeah, okay.
- Nice to meet you.
137
00:05:23,022 --> 00:05:24,923
- We'll see you later.
- All right. All right.
138
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:27,024
- All right, okay... I'm gonna kill you.
- Yeah.
139
00:05:30,129 --> 00:05:31,529
I just got off the phone
with the movers.
140
00:05:31,530 --> 00:05:33,031
They won't be here until tomorrow.
141
00:05:33,032 --> 00:05:35,367
There was a huge accident
on the highway.
142
00:05:35,368 --> 00:05:36,834
Oh, that's great!
143
00:05:38,037 --> 00:05:40,170
I mean, I-I hope no one was hurt.
144
00:05:41,140 --> 00:05:42,774
But now we can go to the barbecue.
145
00:05:42,775 --> 00:05:43,710
What barbecue?
146
00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:45,377
Next door. Our neighbors
just invited us.
147
00:05:45,378 --> 00:05:46,778
Oh, that's nice.
148
00:05:46,779 --> 00:05:48,980
But where are we supposed
to sleep tonight?
149
00:05:48,981 --> 00:05:51,283
Ooh, the camping gear's in the car.
150
00:05:51,284 --> 00:05:52,851
I could set it up in here.
151
00:05:52,852 --> 00:05:55,186
Okay. But I guess that means
152
00:05:55,187 --> 00:05:58,390
you're gonna have
to pitch a tent for me.
153
00:05:58,391 --> 00:06:02,159
I can pitch a tent
if you chop my wood.
154
00:06:04,163 --> 00:06:05,719
Sweetie, we really need
to work on our sexy talk.
155
00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:08,124
Yeah, that was... That was bad.
That was bad.
156
00:06:08,125 --> 00:06:09,901
- (KNOCK AT DOOR)
- MARTY: Hello! Uh, hi.
157
00:06:09,902 --> 00:06:12,404
I'm Marty Butler. My parents
told me you just moved in and...
158
00:06:12,405 --> 00:06:14,806
(LAUGHS)
159
00:06:14,807 --> 00:06:16,641
Ah.
160
00:06:16,642 --> 00:06:18,175
I had to come and see for myself.
161
00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:21,212
Well, hi. I'm Dave Johnson.
Come on in.
162
00:06:21,213 --> 00:06:22,380
- Hi.
- This is my wife Gemma.
163
00:06:22,381 --> 00:06:23,815
Hi, Gemma.
164
00:06:23,816 --> 00:06:25,884
- Hi.
- (LAUGHS)
165
00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:27,552
Oh, boy, oh, boy, they weren't kidding
166
00:06:27,553 --> 00:06:28,987
when they said you guys were-were...
167
00:06:28,988 --> 00:06:31,389
were not from around here.
168
00:06:31,390 --> 00:06:32,657
Oh, no.
169
00:06:32,658 --> 00:06:34,526
We just moved here
from a small town in Michigan.
170
00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:37,062
Right into this neighborhood.
I love it.
171
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:38,363
And why wouldn't you?
172
00:06:38,364 --> 00:06:39,864
Look at these built-ins.
173
00:06:39,865 --> 00:06:41,066
Oh, I know.
174
00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:42,367
Aren't they to die for?
175
00:06:42,368 --> 00:06:44,202
They might just be.
176
00:06:44,203 --> 00:06:46,204
I'm sorry, what?
177
00:06:46,205 --> 00:06:48,840
No, it's just that there aren't
a lot of other people
178
00:06:48,841 --> 00:06:50,275
like you around here.
179
00:06:50,276 --> 00:06:51,776
I'm sorry, are-are you saying
180
00:06:51,777 --> 00:06:53,578
it's gonna be a problem
that we live here?
181
00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:56,114
No, not at all. No, not for me.
You know, I'm an engineer,
182
00:06:56,115 --> 00:06:57,615
so all the science says it's good
183
00:06:57,616 --> 00:06:59,117
for people to live
in diverse communities.
184
00:06:59,118 --> 00:07:01,686
Oh. Well, good. We
couldn't agree more.
185
00:07:01,687 --> 00:07:04,923
Yeah, it's too bad
my dad hates science.
186
00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:07,926
Calvin? But he just
invited us to a barbecue.
187
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:10,061
Oh, no. No, actually, my mom did.
188
00:07:10,062 --> 00:07:12,364
At least, that's how
it's being discussed very loudly
189
00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:13,765
at my house right now.
190
00:07:13,766 --> 00:07:15,300
Oh. Well, Gem,
191
00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:16,888
if that's how he feels,
we shouldn't go.
192
00:07:16,889 --> 00:07:18,937
Ooh. Uh, I'm afraid
it's not that easy.
193
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:21,406
You see, my mom invited
you into her home.
194
00:07:21,407 --> 00:07:23,375
If you don't come,
she will be offended.
195
00:07:23,376 --> 00:07:24,743
Won't she understand?
196
00:07:24,744 --> 00:07:25,844
Seriously?
197
00:07:27,246 --> 00:07:29,480
What is it like where you come from?
198
00:07:31,083 --> 00:07:33,451
Besides, you got to come
or you'll seem racist.
199
00:07:33,452 --> 00:07:34,819
Is that the original hardware
200
00:07:34,820 --> 00:07:36,788
on this door?
201
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:38,957
What? We are not racist.
202
00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:42,127
If-if anyone's being racist,
it sounds like it's your dad.
203
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:44,295
Ooh, no, no, no, no, no. See, uh,
204
00:07:44,296 --> 00:07:46,464
black people can't be racist.
205
00:07:46,465 --> 00:07:48,600
We can be racial.
206
00:07:48,601 --> 00:07:50,434
Not "cist."
207
00:07:51,470 --> 00:07:54,072
"Cial." "Cist."
208
00:07:54,073 --> 00:07:56,608
Well, we're not "cist" or "cial" or...
209
00:07:56,609 --> 00:07:58,342
Whatever we are, we're not.
210
00:07:59,445 --> 00:08:01,279
Your mom was nice enough to invite us,
211
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:04,582
and where we come from, that
means something. We're going.
212
00:08:04,583 --> 00:08:06,563
- Okay, but, Gem, we're...
- I said we're going.
213
00:08:07,319 --> 00:08:10,320
And we are gonna have fun!
214
00:08:11,524 --> 00:08:13,790
Oh, I know I'm gonna have some fun.
215
00:08:18,132 --> 00:08:19,433
Hey, Pop, Mom wants to know how...
216
00:08:19,434 --> 00:08:22,202
(COUGHING)
217
00:08:22,203 --> 00:08:24,304
Mm-hmm.
218
00:08:24,305 --> 00:08:27,326
That's what you get for
pulling that little stunt
219
00:08:27,327 --> 00:08:29,061
you did with the neighbors earlier.
220
00:08:29,062 --> 00:08:31,696
You lucky it's the smoke the
only thing that's choking you.
221
00:08:33,634 --> 00:08:35,301
Okay, man.
222
00:08:35,302 --> 00:08:37,737
Look, why are you so mad that
that guy's coming over here?
223
00:08:37,738 --> 00:08:40,907
Because it's Yardecue Day,
and this is my house,
224
00:08:40,908 --> 00:08:43,776
- and I don't like that guy.
- Oh, yeah? Why?
225
00:08:43,777 --> 00:08:45,177
Because he's too familiar.
226
00:08:45,178 --> 00:08:47,179
He acts like he knows
you when he doesn't,
227
00:08:47,180 --> 00:08:48,814
and I can't stand that.
228
00:08:48,815 --> 00:08:51,284
It sounds like he's
just being friendly, Pop.
229
00:08:51,285 --> 00:08:53,885
Exactly. It's weird, man.
230
00:08:54,988 --> 00:08:56,188
A-And I'm pretty sure
231
00:08:56,189 --> 00:08:57,657
it's racist, too. (SCOFFS)
232
00:08:57,658 --> 00:08:59,859
Oh, man, he's cool.
233
00:08:59,860 --> 00:09:02,662
The first thing he did when
he got here was shake my hand.
234
00:09:02,663 --> 00:09:04,664
Son, look, you're only saying that
235
00:09:04,665 --> 00:09:07,466
because you don't know
there are two types of racists:
236
00:09:07,467 --> 00:09:09,268
there's ones who hate black people
237
00:09:09,269 --> 00:09:11,169
and ones who love black people.
238
00:09:12,139 --> 00:09:14,273
A white guy trying to shake your hand?
239
00:09:14,274 --> 00:09:16,943
(CHUCKLES) Stay woke, son.
240
00:09:16,944 --> 00:09:21,647
Is this meat the only thing
you been smoking all day?
241
00:09:21,648 --> 00:09:25,217
Son, look, there are some white people
242
00:09:25,218 --> 00:09:28,120
that love black people
just because they're black.
243
00:09:28,121 --> 00:09:30,189
Makes them feel all good
on the inside.
244
00:09:30,190 --> 00:09:32,625
You know,
like they're doing us a favor.
245
00:09:32,626 --> 00:09:34,692
"Hey, I have lots of black friends.
246
00:09:35,796 --> 00:09:37,129
"I'm a good person.
247
00:09:37,130 --> 00:09:39,899
I find Rihanna very attractive."
248
00:09:39,900 --> 00:09:42,902
So, basically, you think
this guy is racist
249
00:09:42,903 --> 00:09:44,904
because he's too nice to you?
250
00:09:44,905 --> 00:09:48,073
Think about it. Would you
be nice to me if we just met?
251
00:09:50,043 --> 00:09:52,478
Well, damn, that's a good point.
252
00:09:52,479 --> 00:09:55,181
Besides, man,
this is a black neighborhood,
253
00:09:55,182 --> 00:09:57,717
something built for us by us.
254
00:09:57,718 --> 00:09:59,518
You let one family like that move in,
255
00:09:59,519 --> 00:10:02,188
and next thing you know,
it's gonna be a bunch of dudes
256
00:10:02,189 --> 00:10:04,557
jogging around
in their little short shorts,
257
00:10:04,558 --> 00:10:06,724
walking their vegan labradoodles.
258
00:10:08,161 --> 00:10:10,429
Dad, do we have to go to the barbecue?
259
00:10:10,430 --> 00:10:12,697
Why? Did Mommy say
we didn't have to go?
260
00:10:14,668 --> 00:10:15,901
No.
261
00:10:15,902 --> 00:10:18,404
Oh. Well, why don't
you want to go, buddy?
262
00:10:18,405 --> 00:10:20,706
I think there's gonna be a
bunch of kids over there.
263
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:23,342
I know, but what if no one
wants to play with me?
264
00:10:23,343 --> 00:10:25,211
Oh, come here.
265
00:10:25,212 --> 00:10:27,713
Look... (SIGHS)
266
00:10:27,714 --> 00:10:30,783
I know you're scared, and that's okay.
267
00:10:30,784 --> 00:10:34,954
I-I'm surprisingly worried, too.
268
00:10:34,955 --> 00:10:37,857
But trust me, we're both
gonna go over there.
269
00:10:37,858 --> 00:10:39,725
We're gonna make some friends today.
270
00:10:39,726 --> 00:10:43,061
All right, Johnsons, let's go
make that jerk love us.
271
00:10:44,598 --> 00:10:46,532
Is Mommy why you're worried?
272
00:10:46,533 --> 00:10:48,467
She is now.
273
00:10:48,468 --> 00:10:50,302
Hey, baby.
274
00:10:50,303 --> 00:10:52,405
Any sign of the new neighbors yet?
275
00:10:52,406 --> 00:10:53,572
Nope.
276
00:10:53,573 --> 00:10:55,207
- Well, ain't that something?
- Hmm.
277
00:10:55,208 --> 00:10:56,942
I invite them into my home,
278
00:10:56,943 --> 00:10:58,611
laugh at his corny jokes.
279
00:10:58,612 --> 00:11:01,447
You know, he has the
audacity not to show up.
280
00:11:01,448 --> 00:11:03,916
- Tina!
- Hi, Dave.
281
00:11:03,917 --> 00:11:06,719
So glad you could make it.
282
00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:07,920
Calvin.
283
00:11:07,921 --> 00:11:09,989
Hey, Dave.
284
00:11:09,990 --> 00:11:12,324
Hi, I'm Tina.
285
00:11:12,325 --> 00:11:14,894
I'm Gemma. This is our son, Grover.
286
00:11:14,895 --> 00:11:16,327
Grover?
287
00:11:18,098 --> 00:11:20,466
Grover Johnson?
288
00:11:20,467 --> 00:11:23,636
We brought this. We got it to
celebrate our first night
289
00:11:23,637 --> 00:11:25,404
in the house, but we thought
it'd be fun to share it
290
00:11:25,405 --> 00:11:26,572
with our new neighbors.
291
00:11:26,573 --> 00:11:28,274
Oh, how thoughtful.
292
00:11:28,275 --> 00:11:29,608
Isn't that thoughtful, baby?
293
00:11:29,609 --> 00:11:32,111
I'm more of a beer man, myself.
294
00:11:32,112 --> 00:11:34,246
I'm more of a beer man, too.
295
00:11:34,247 --> 00:11:36,315
I just love a good IPA. How about you?
296
00:11:36,316 --> 00:11:38,984
Dude, I just like beer.
297
00:11:38,985 --> 00:11:42,188
Well, how about we go inside
and pop this baby open?
298
00:11:42,189 --> 00:11:45,857
And show all these freeloaders
how to bring a gift!
299
00:11:47,994 --> 00:11:50,629
So aren't you gonna go in
and have some champagne?
300
00:11:50,630 --> 00:11:54,199
No, like I said,
I'm-I'm a beer man, too.
301
00:11:57,337 --> 00:11:59,037
So, let's take a look at your meat.
302
00:12:01,341 --> 00:12:02,574
I'm gonna go inside.
303
00:12:14,187 --> 00:12:16,020
You guys playing chess?
304
00:12:17,557 --> 00:12:18,724
Who's winning?
305
00:12:18,725 --> 00:12:20,793
Malcolm always beats me,
306
00:12:20,794 --> 00:12:22,995
- but today I got him...
- Checkmate. (LAUGHS)
307
00:12:22,996 --> 00:12:24,964
Oh, you... I'm-I'm-I'm sorry.
308
00:12:24,965 --> 00:12:26,699
That's-that's my fault,
I distracted you.
309
00:12:26,700 --> 00:12:29,301
Yeah. You heard him, he distracted me.
310
00:12:29,302 --> 00:12:31,003
He owes you five dollars, not me.
311
00:12:31,004 --> 00:12:33,706
(LAUGHS)
312
00:12:33,707 --> 00:12:35,641
We started to meet earlier; I'm Dave.
313
00:12:35,642 --> 00:12:36,709
Hey, Dave. I'm Malcolm.
314
00:12:36,710 --> 00:12:38,710
May I? Yeah, go ahead, man.
315
00:12:39,746 --> 00:12:42,046
I'm white.
316
00:12:43,383 --> 00:12:45,885
Yes, you are.
317
00:12:45,886 --> 00:12:49,221
(LAUGHS)
318
00:12:49,222 --> 00:12:51,524
So, you and Marty both live here?
319
00:12:51,525 --> 00:12:53,726
Oh, no, I do. When Marty got a job,
320
00:12:53,727 --> 00:12:55,895
he moved to a different neighborhood.
321
00:12:55,896 --> 00:12:57,196
Oh, how come?
322
00:12:57,197 --> 00:12:58,531
Because my dad said,
323
00:12:58,532 --> 00:13:00,166
"You got a job, now get out."
324
00:13:00,167 --> 00:13:02,101
(LAUGHS)
325
00:13:02,102 --> 00:13:04,003
So tell me about the other neighbors.
326
00:13:04,004 --> 00:13:05,504
Okay. Well, um,
327
00:13:05,505 --> 00:13:07,339
that's Rudy and Teresa's
place over there.
328
00:13:07,340 --> 00:13:08,674
They're really nice.
329
00:13:08,675 --> 00:13:10,609
Miss Kim, she's an elderly lady,
330
00:13:10,610 --> 00:13:13,913
she lives over there, and
that is where Victor lives.
331
00:13:13,914 --> 00:13:14,947
Oh, what's Victor like?
332
00:13:14,948 --> 00:13:16,615
Oh, he's cool, man.
333
00:13:16,616 --> 00:13:18,650
You know, for a crackhead.
334
00:13:20,053 --> 00:13:22,254
Wow. I mean, that's-that's crazy...
335
00:13:22,255 --> 00:13:24,590
that we live across the
street from a-a crackhead.
336
00:13:24,591 --> 00:13:27,026
Hey, man.
337
00:13:27,027 --> 00:13:29,595
You can't be calling
Crackhead Victor a crackhead.
338
00:13:29,596 --> 00:13:32,531
I'm-I'm sorry, but you just did.
339
00:13:32,532 --> 00:13:34,733
I know I did, because
I know him like that.
340
00:13:34,734 --> 00:13:36,569
You don't, all right?
341
00:13:36,570 --> 00:13:39,305
That dude used to be the
coolest guy on this block.
342
00:13:39,306 --> 00:13:41,941
We used to ride our bikes up
and down the street together.
343
00:13:41,942 --> 00:13:44,743
Wow, so you guys were friends?
What happened?
344
00:13:44,744 --> 00:13:46,344
The dude started smoking crack.
345
00:13:47,747 --> 00:13:50,049
Man, you know, I used to think
that guys like him
346
00:13:50,050 --> 00:13:52,284
were the problem, but now,
seeing everything
347
00:13:52,285 --> 00:13:55,454
that's going on with the opioid
epidemic, starting to think
348
00:13:55,455 --> 00:13:57,392
that it's the addicts who
are the real victims.
349
00:13:57,393 --> 00:13:58,090
Absolutely.
350
00:13:58,091 --> 00:13:59,725
- Who're the real victims?
- The addicts.
351
00:13:59,726 --> 00:14:03,229
Like our neighbor, Crack...
(CLEARS THROAT)
352
00:14:03,230 --> 00:14:05,164
Like Victor.
353
00:14:05,165 --> 00:14:07,900
(CHUCKLES) You see, son?
354
00:14:07,901 --> 00:14:09,501
See? This is what I'm talking about.
355
00:14:09,502 --> 00:14:11,403
This guy likes black people so much,
356
00:14:11,404 --> 00:14:13,105
he thinks he likes Victor.
357
00:14:13,106 --> 00:14:15,341
Okay.
358
00:14:15,342 --> 00:14:16,976
We'll see how much you
like him once he steals
359
00:14:16,977 --> 00:14:18,943
all the airbags out your car.
360
00:14:24,517 --> 00:14:26,252
Hi.
361
00:14:26,253 --> 00:14:28,821
Hey, everybody's almost gone;
maybe we should go, too.
362
00:14:28,822 --> 00:14:31,023
No way. Tina and I are having fun.
363
00:14:31,024 --> 00:14:33,491
Did you know she was
a Laker girl for one game?
364
00:14:34,995 --> 00:14:36,662
But, you know, I don't think
Calvin wants us here.
365
00:14:36,663 --> 00:14:37,963
I keep trying to connect with him
366
00:14:37,964 --> 00:14:39,765
and nothing seems to be working.
367
00:14:39,766 --> 00:14:42,167
Oh, sweetie, relax.
You're trying too hard.
368
00:14:42,168 --> 00:14:43,501
You're coming off thirsty.
369
00:14:44,971 --> 00:14:46,105
Tina just taught me that.
370
00:14:46,106 --> 00:14:47,640
Oh.
371
00:14:47,641 --> 00:14:49,608
Girl, I realized we have
been talking all day,
372
00:14:49,609 --> 00:14:51,644
and I still haven't asked you
why you moved here.
373
00:14:51,645 --> 00:14:53,479
Oh, I got a job as a principal
374
00:14:53,480 --> 00:14:55,981
- at a little progressive school nearby.
- Oh, wow.
375
00:14:55,982 --> 00:14:58,117
Wait a minute now.
What's a "progressive school"?
376
00:14:58,118 --> 00:15:01,220
Oh, it means they don't
teach the kids anything.
377
00:15:01,221 --> 00:15:03,289
That's not true.
378
00:15:03,290 --> 00:15:05,457
We just believe children learn
better when they're motivated
379
00:15:05,458 --> 00:15:08,294
by a feeling of personal
satisfaction instead of grades.
380
00:15:08,295 --> 00:15:11,363
Okay. Yeah. Th-That's the
progressive way of saying
381
00:15:11,364 --> 00:15:13,465
what I just said.
382
00:15:13,466 --> 00:15:15,401
Don't talk to my new friend like that.
383
00:15:15,402 --> 00:15:17,835
It's not her fault that her
school sounds stupid.
384
00:15:19,406 --> 00:15:21,540
I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way.
385
00:15:21,541 --> 00:15:23,328
It's cool. I know you
weren't throwing shade.
386
00:15:23,329 --> 00:15:24,362
Ah.
387
00:15:24,363 --> 00:15:26,010
I learned that, too.
388
00:15:27,514 --> 00:15:29,915
Oh, baby, there you are.
Come on in, join us.
389
00:15:29,916 --> 00:15:31,884
Oh, actually, I was gonna eat outside.
390
00:15:31,885 --> 00:15:33,519
But there's nobody out there.
391
00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:35,387
Exactly.
392
00:15:35,388 --> 00:15:36,855
Please.
393
00:15:36,856 --> 00:15:38,991
(SIGHS)
394
00:15:38,992 --> 00:15:41,526
Oh. Oh.
395
00:15:43,897 --> 00:15:46,265
Th-There's a button
right next to you, on the side.
396
00:15:46,266 --> 00:15:49,501
It's all you.
397
00:15:49,502 --> 00:15:52,738
So, Dave, what do you do?
398
00:15:52,739 --> 00:15:55,240
I'm a professional conflict mediator.
399
00:15:55,241 --> 00:15:56,342
What's that?
400
00:15:56,343 --> 00:15:57,676
Well, you know, when two people
401
00:15:57,677 --> 00:15:59,211
have a problem they can't solve,
402
00:15:59,212 --> 00:16:02,414
they hire me to come in
and help them fix it.
403
00:16:02,415 --> 00:16:04,850
So it's like when I fix a car,
but what I do is real,
404
00:16:04,851 --> 00:16:07,619
and... what you do
405
00:16:07,620 --> 00:16:10,055
is some touchy-feely
fairy-tale-type crap.
406
00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:12,558
Well, I wouldn't call it a fairy tale.
407
00:16:12,559 --> 00:16:15,694
Yeah, it's a real job,
and he's good at it.
408
00:16:15,695 --> 00:16:17,229
It sounds like to me, you think
409
00:16:17,230 --> 00:16:19,431
you just know better
than everybody else.
410
00:16:19,432 --> 00:16:20,799
MALCOLM: Oh, please.
You are the only one here
411
00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:23,469
who thinks he knows better
than everybody else.
412
00:16:23,470 --> 00:16:26,605
Okay, you know, I've had about
enough of your disrespect today.
413
00:16:26,606 --> 00:16:28,540
Pop, you're always talking
to me about respect,
414
00:16:28,541 --> 00:16:30,776
- and you never show me any.
- Well, that's because
415
00:16:30,777 --> 00:16:34,912
when I get up, I go to work;
when you get up, you go pee.
416
00:16:36,449 --> 00:16:39,918
You know what, man? I don't need this.
417
00:16:39,919 --> 00:16:41,754
- You don't need what?
- I don't need you telling me
418
00:16:41,755 --> 00:16:44,123
to get a job all the time like
I don't have plans of my own.
419
00:16:44,124 --> 00:16:46,592
Plans of your own? (LAUGHS)
Boy, you can't even afford
420
00:16:46,593 --> 00:16:49,061
your own data plan.
421
00:16:49,062 --> 00:16:50,829
Well, that's funny, right?
Embarrassing me in front
422
00:16:50,830 --> 00:16:52,331
- of these people I don't know?
- You-you started it.
423
00:16:52,332 --> 00:16:56,935
(OVERLAPPING ARGUING)
424
00:16:56,936 --> 00:16:58,404
Hey, uh, guys.
425
00:16:58,405 --> 00:17:00,439
Guys.
426
00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:02,673
Maybe I can help.
427
00:17:04,244 --> 00:17:05,811
- Oh, God, Dave, please don't.
- No, no, no, it's okay.
428
00:17:05,812 --> 00:17:08,013
Look, this-this is what I do.
429
00:17:08,014 --> 00:17:13,018
Now, it seems to me like neither
one of you is feeling respected.
430
00:17:13,019 --> 00:17:14,552
Wow.
431
00:17:18,425 --> 00:17:19,958
Dave, you are really good at your job.
432
00:17:19,959 --> 00:17:22,094
Thanks.
433
00:17:22,095 --> 00:17:24,129
Malcolm, tell your dad
434
00:17:24,130 --> 00:17:25,831
why you feel like
he doesn't respect you.
435
00:17:25,832 --> 00:17:28,300
Come on, come on. I'm not doing this.
436
00:17:28,301 --> 00:17:29,635
See, no.
437
00:17:29,636 --> 00:17:30,969
This is just another white guy
438
00:17:30,970 --> 00:17:32,504
trying to fix a black man's problem
439
00:17:32,505 --> 00:17:34,606
so he can feel good about himself.
440
00:17:34,607 --> 00:17:36,208
Calvin, that's not fair.
441
00:17:36,209 --> 00:17:38,110
Really? Okay.
442
00:17:38,111 --> 00:17:40,512
Tell me how you feel about Rihanna.
443
00:17:40,513 --> 00:17:41,713
I find her very attractive.
444
00:17:41,714 --> 00:17:43,015
Oh, God.
445
00:17:43,016 --> 00:17:44,817
You see? This is what
I'm talking about.
446
00:17:44,818 --> 00:17:47,286
I've been giving this guy
a hard time all day,
447
00:17:47,287 --> 00:17:48,987
yet he's still being nice to me.
448
00:17:48,988 --> 00:17:51,190
Why? Because I'm a black man.
449
00:17:51,191 --> 00:17:53,959
It's like affirmative
action for friends.
450
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:56,995
Okay, look. Uh, Calvin,
that's not true.
451
00:17:56,996 --> 00:17:59,298
Look, I-I just want to be
friends with my neighbors.
452
00:17:59,299 --> 00:18:01,333
And yeah, maybe I'm trying
a little extra hard
453
00:18:01,334 --> 00:18:02,901
because I'm the only white guy around.
454
00:18:02,902 --> 00:18:04,803
If that makes me seem racist,
455
00:18:04,804 --> 00:18:08,406
then... (SIGHS) I'm-I'm sorry.
456
00:18:09,709 --> 00:18:11,943
In fact... Hey, look, I'm...
457
00:18:13,179 --> 00:18:14,246
I'm sorry...
458
00:18:14,247 --> 00:18:17,615
if-if I seem racist.
459
00:18:21,020 --> 00:18:22,221
(STAMMERS) I'm... Hey, hey, man,
460
00:18:22,222 --> 00:18:23,754
I'm-I'm sorry if I seem racist.
461
00:18:27,694 --> 00:18:28,926
All right.
462
00:18:31,865 --> 00:18:33,030
Thank you.
463
00:18:37,437 --> 00:18:40,104
Look, if I give you a hug,
would you leave my house?
464
00:18:43,176 --> 00:18:46,911
All right. Okay. All right.
465
00:18:49,949 --> 00:18:52,149
Cool, Dad, you made the jerk like you.
466
00:18:53,386 --> 00:18:56,421
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you.
467
00:18:56,422 --> 00:18:58,891
Thank you, thank you, thank
you so much for having us.
468
00:18:58,892 --> 00:19:00,592
Yeah, uh, you'll have to
come over to our house next.
469
00:19:00,593 --> 00:19:01,927
Okay.
470
00:19:01,928 --> 00:19:03,529
And it's because we want you there,
471
00:19:03,530 --> 00:19:04,796
not just because you're black.
472
00:19:04,797 --> 00:19:07,232
- Dave!
- Okay.
473
00:19:07,233 --> 00:19:09,301
(DOOR CLOSES)
474
00:19:09,302 --> 00:19:10,903
Can you believe it?
475
00:19:10,904 --> 00:19:12,871
I mean, can you believe it?
476
00:19:12,872 --> 00:19:15,573
That little boy's name
is Grover Johnson.
477
00:19:24,533 --> 00:19:25,667
Hey, what's up, man?
478
00:19:25,668 --> 00:19:28,069
Oh, hey.
479
00:19:28,070 --> 00:19:29,671
Wait.
480
00:19:29,672 --> 00:19:30,839
You're not gonna jump over here
481
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:32,107
and try to hug me again, are you?
482
00:19:32,108 --> 00:19:35,543
(LAUGHS) No, no.
483
00:19:35,544 --> 00:19:38,280
Hey, thanks for having my back
in there with your dad.
484
00:19:38,281 --> 00:19:39,781
Oh, that's cool.
485
00:19:39,782 --> 00:19:41,449
But, you know, if he kicks me out,
486
00:19:41,450 --> 00:19:43,150
I'm coming to move in with y'all.
487
00:19:47,089 --> 00:19:49,124
Hey, can I ask you a question?
488
00:19:49,125 --> 00:19:51,526
Do you think it was a
mistake to move here?
489
00:19:51,527 --> 00:19:53,361
Why would that be a mistake?
490
00:19:53,362 --> 00:19:54,863
Well, I-I don't know.
491
00:19:54,864 --> 00:19:57,032
You know, maybe you're dad's right;
492
00:19:57,033 --> 00:19:58,633
I don't fit in here.
493
00:19:58,634 --> 00:20:00,535
I kept trying to be a good guy today,
494
00:20:00,536 --> 00:20:03,371
but no one seemed to see me that way.
495
00:20:03,372 --> 00:20:06,942
Yeah, well, you know, it's hard
when you see yourself one way,
496
00:20:06,943 --> 00:20:10,844
and the rest of the world,
they... see you another.
497
00:20:13,783 --> 00:20:15,483
Doesn't feel very good, does it?
498
00:20:15,484 --> 00:20:18,352
Nope. Not at all.
499
00:20:20,589 --> 00:20:22,324
Look, you know... (SIGHS)
500
00:20:22,325 --> 00:20:25,060
this is gonna sound corny,
501
00:20:25,061 --> 00:20:26,761
but I-I really believe
502
00:20:26,762 --> 00:20:28,930
that if people would just focus
on what we have in common
503
00:20:28,931 --> 00:20:31,132
instead of how we're different,
504
00:20:31,133 --> 00:20:34,402
w-we could solve
so many of our problems.
505
00:20:34,403 --> 00:20:37,505
You know what? That may be true.
506
00:20:37,506 --> 00:20:40,241
But I also think it's a lot
easier for someone like you
507
00:20:40,242 --> 00:20:42,976
to believe that, than it is
for someone like me.
508
00:20:45,247 --> 00:20:47,014
Okay.
509
00:20:48,451 --> 00:20:50,018
I better get to bed.
510
00:20:50,019 --> 00:20:51,953
Uh, good night.
511
00:20:51,954 --> 00:20:54,656
Good night, man.
512
00:20:54,657 --> 00:20:55,957
Hey, Dave.
513
00:20:55,958 --> 00:20:57,592
Yeah?
514
00:20:57,593 --> 00:20:59,860
Welcome to the neighborhood.
515
00:21:05,368 --> 00:21:07,669
"I have lots of black friends."
516
00:21:07,670 --> 00:21:11,479
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