1
00:00:03,667 --> 00:00:06,167
Let me guess.
You're painting a cat's soul.

2
00:00:07,709 --> 00:00:08,959
I'm painting my mood.

3
00:00:09,166 --> 00:00:11,746
Wow, Avery.
I've never seen you this down.

4
00:00:11,959 --> 00:00:14,079
But don't worry,
I know how to cheer you up.

5
00:00:14,417 --> 00:00:16,577
♪ I'm your furry fun technician ♪

6
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,627
♪ Here to fix your disposition ♪

7
00:00:18,750 --> 00:00:21,500
♪ Pouting can be infantile ♪

8
00:00:21,583 --> 00:00:25,713
♪ Time to make that infant smile ♪

9
00:00:27,333 --> 00:00:29,463
Jazz paws!

10
00:00:31,500 --> 00:00:33,580
Nothin'? Really?

11
00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:35,917
You always smile at jazz paws.

12
00:00:36,875 --> 00:00:38,915
I really messed up with Wes.

13
00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:42,000
Stan: This is where Avery went on and on
about how she was tutoring Wes

14
00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:45,003
in Spanish to get close to him.
But she doesn't know Spanish.

15
00:00:45,250 --> 00:00:47,380
So, when he asked her out in Spanish,

16
00:00:47,458 --> 00:00:49,708
she didn't know what he was saying
and turned him down.

17
00:00:49,792 --> 00:00:51,002
So now,
she's really bummed.

18
00:00:51,083 --> 00:00:52,543
-- really bummed.

19
00:00:53,208 --> 00:00:57,208
Okay, well, just go tell Wes
there was a misunderstanding.

20
00:00:57,291 --> 00:00:59,421
That's what I would do
if I were in your shoes.

21
00:00:59,875 --> 00:01:03,455
In fact, I am in your shoes!

22
00:01:03,542 --> 00:01:06,962
What?
How did this happen?

23
00:01:08,750 --> 00:01:10,000
( upbeat music playing )

24
00:01:10,583 --> 00:01:12,883
Yeah.

25
00:01:12,959 --> 00:01:14,419
Check it out.

26
00:01:14,542 --> 00:01:15,632
Whoo!

27
00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:19,329
There's the shaker.

28
00:01:20,667 --> 00:01:21,877
You getting this?

29
00:01:24,792 --> 00:01:25,832
Boom!

30
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,670
Wow, I feel so much better.

31
00:01:28,083 --> 00:01:29,333
( music resumes )

32
00:01:32,291 --> 00:01:33,961
Wow, that's hard.

33
00:01:34,959 --> 00:01:36,829
Try doing it without proper knees.

34
00:01:37,709 --> 00:01:39,629
Maybe I do just tell Wes the truth.

35
00:01:39,709 --> 00:01:42,169
That it was just a misunderstanding.
That should be easy.

36
00:01:42,250 --> 00:01:45,040
-You should call him right now.
-No. I have time.

37
00:01:45,125 --> 00:01:46,495
This just happened yesterday.

38
00:01:46,583 --> 00:01:48,173
It's not like he's just gonna
walk up to someone else

39
00:01:48,250 --> 00:01:49,960
and say "Do you want to go out with me?"

40
00:01:50,125 --> 00:01:51,625
Do you want to go out with me?

41
00:01:53,291 --> 00:01:54,711
( theme music playing )

42
00:02:10,875 --> 00:02:13,165
-You want me to go out with you?
-Yeah.

43
00:02:13,583 --> 00:02:17,213
Stan: Oh, snap! Driz-ama.

44
00:02:17,291 --> 00:02:18,921
It's like a drama-cano erupted

45
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,830
and now we're all living in a drama-cracy.

46
00:02:22,583 --> 00:02:24,423
Now, let's see how we got there.

47
00:02:25,166 --> 00:02:27,126
( rewinding )

48
00:02:28,041 --> 00:02:29,461
Bye.

49
00:02:29,542 --> 00:02:32,042
-Oh, I'm so sorry.
-Oh, no, it was my fault.

50
00:02:32,125 --> 00:02:33,745
I wasn't looking
where I was going.

51
00:02:33,834 --> 00:02:35,794
And usually I staple my hats on.

52
00:02:35,875 --> 00:02:36,995
I'm kidding, gross.

53
00:02:37,083 --> 00:02:38,923
Okay, one time, and only to my hair.

54
00:02:40,375 --> 00:02:41,625
Thanks.

55
00:02:42,041 --> 00:02:43,501
Oh, Lindsay, it's you.

56
00:02:43,583 --> 00:02:45,793
I didn't recognize you without your hat.

57
00:02:47,041 --> 00:02:48,631
So, I guess you heard,

58
00:02:48,709 --> 00:02:50,039
Avery totally shot me down.

59
00:02:50,125 --> 00:02:51,625
I thought Avery really liked you.

60
00:02:51,875 --> 00:02:54,915
I kind of thought so, too,
but I guess she changed her mind.

61
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,540
Oh, I'm sorry.

62
00:02:56,667 --> 00:02:58,167
Thanks.

63
00:02:58,250 --> 00:02:59,540
You're really cool.

64
00:02:59,625 --> 00:03:01,075
Do you want to go out with me?

65
00:03:01,208 --> 00:03:02,998
You want me to go out with you?

66
00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:06,583
Yeah, I have two tickets to the movie
in the park this weekend. It'll be fun.

67
00:03:06,875 --> 00:03:09,875
Er, I guess if Avery's
not interested anymore...

68
00:03:10,250 --> 00:03:11,580
...I'd love to.

69
00:03:13,542 --> 00:03:14,792
Are you cold?

70
00:03:14,875 --> 00:03:16,705
I get happy chills.
It's normal.

71
00:03:16,792 --> 00:03:18,172
Not really.
But for me.

72
00:03:19,458 --> 00:03:21,128
Well, I'm happy too.

73
00:03:22,166 --> 00:03:24,166
That's not normal for me.

74
00:03:25,542 --> 00:03:27,002
Well, er, I'll see you later.

75
00:03:27,166 --> 00:03:28,326
Bye!

76
00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:32,830
Hey, Lindsay, have you seen Wes?
I really need to talk to him.

77
00:03:32,917 --> 00:03:36,077
Stan: This is where Avery tells Lindsay
what happened when Wes asked her out.

78
00:03:36,166 --> 00:03:38,166
Spanish book, Spanish book.

79
00:03:38,834 --> 00:03:41,334
Lindsay says what happened
when Wes asked her out.

80
00:03:41,417 --> 00:03:43,207
Happy chills, happy chills.

81
00:03:43,417 --> 00:03:45,537
And she's all "What the what?"

82
00:03:45,709 --> 00:03:47,709
And she's all "I know, right?"

83
00:03:48,583 --> 00:03:50,043
And you said yes?

84
00:03:50,166 --> 00:03:52,126
Well, I guess I should've
talked to you first,

85
00:03:52,208 --> 00:03:54,998
but I was kinda stunned
and he put me on the spot and--

86
00:03:55,208 --> 00:03:56,628
Stop happy chilling!

87
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,000
Happy chills?
Is it because I'm here?

88
00:03:59,375 --> 00:04:01,035
I do light up a room.

89
00:04:02,041 --> 00:04:04,581
Wes asked Lindsay out and she said yes.

90
00:04:04,834 --> 00:04:07,754
What does everyone see in this
charming, handsome Wes guy?

91
00:04:07,834 --> 00:04:08,964
I go for weird.

92
00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:12,171
Give me someone who doesn't shower
and laughs at inappropriate times.

93
00:04:12,250 --> 00:04:14,290
-( laughs )
-Sup.

94
00:04:16,291 --> 00:04:19,461
So, Lindsay, now that you know
that I turned Wes down by mistake,

95
00:04:19,542 --> 00:04:21,082
you can't go out with him.
Right?

96
00:04:21,166 --> 00:04:23,786
I mean, I'm the one who had the crush
on him this whole time, right?

97
00:04:24,875 --> 00:04:27,745
-Right?
-Right, you're the one who had the crush.

98
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:29,464
That's the upside of weird dudes.

99
00:04:29,542 --> 00:04:32,332
There's plenty to go around
and nobody fights over them.

100
00:04:33,333 --> 00:04:36,293
-Are you okay with this, Linds?
-Yeah, yeah, it's no big deal.

101
00:04:36,375 --> 00:04:38,705
It's just, you know,
I got asked out by a cute boy.

102
00:04:38,792 --> 00:04:40,672
That's like finding a dollar
bill on the ground

103
00:04:40,750 --> 00:04:42,380
and then finding
the person who dropped it.

104
00:04:42,458 --> 00:04:45,498
You're like, "Ooh, a dollar!"
And then you're like, "Oh, here."

105
00:04:46,333 --> 00:04:49,713
And that person would have said
"Thank you so much!"

106
00:04:49,792 --> 00:04:52,002
You never would have felt right
spending that dollar.

107
00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:55,378
And I would have said,
"Wow. It's just a dollar."

108
00:04:57,792 --> 00:04:59,542
Hey, Dad,
you wanted to talk to me?

109
00:04:59,625 --> 00:05:02,075
Yep, it's something pretty cool.

110
00:05:02,291 --> 00:05:04,461
-My cool or your cool?
-What's the difference?

111
00:05:04,542 --> 00:05:05,922
One is cool.

112
00:05:06,834 --> 00:05:09,174
I just got off the phone
with my publishing company

113
00:05:09,250 --> 00:05:11,250
about my new fathers and sons book called

114
00:05:11,333 --> 00:05:12,923
Fathers and Sons.

115
00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:15,670
-They wanted to pitch me some cover ideas.
-Better titles?

116
00:05:16,667 --> 00:05:19,627
Anyways, I told them that
I wasn't interested in their pitches

117
00:05:19,709 --> 00:05:22,499
because I already had
a cover idea of my own,

118
00:05:22,625 --> 00:05:25,915
a picture of the author and his son.

119
00:05:26,083 --> 00:05:29,253
But you're the author and I'm your son.

120
00:05:29,333 --> 00:05:32,543
I know.
Pretty cool, huh?

121
00:05:32,625 --> 00:05:34,375
They fought me on it, but I won.

122
00:05:34,458 --> 00:05:37,498
You see, son, when you really
want something, you do not take "No,"

123
00:05:37,583 --> 00:05:39,173
or "No, are you serious?"

124
00:05:39,250 --> 00:05:42,420
or "No, what is this, some kind of
vanity project?" for an answer.

125
00:05:43,166 --> 00:05:44,996
So, my picture will be on your book?

126
00:05:45,166 --> 00:05:46,166
No, Son.

127
00:05:46,291 --> 00:05:48,751
Our picture will be on my book, huh?

128
00:05:48,834 --> 00:05:51,884
What pose do you think?
Uh...Action.

129
00:05:51,959 --> 00:05:53,919
Surprised.

130
00:05:54,583 --> 00:05:56,883
Bulls locking horns.

131
00:05:56,959 --> 00:05:58,919
Pointing at an unknown object.

132
00:05:59,125 --> 00:06:01,375
Two guys just tickling each other.

133
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:03,920
Dad, stop!

134
00:06:04,125 --> 00:06:06,375
Listen, Dad, about this cover thing...

135
00:06:06,458 --> 00:06:09,078
-...all my friends will see it and...
-I know, Son.

136
00:06:09,166 --> 00:06:10,916
It's a dream come true for me, too.

137
00:06:11,166 --> 00:06:12,206
CHLOE: Hey, guys.

138
00:06:12,417 --> 00:06:14,537
I can say that 'cause you're guys.

139
00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:17,375
If you were girls, I'd say,
"Hey, powerful women."

140
00:06:18,542 --> 00:06:20,632
My teacher, Pam, taught me that.

141
00:06:20,709 --> 00:06:23,169
She's a powerful woman.
And I am, too.

142
00:06:23,417 --> 00:06:24,877
( laughing )

143
00:06:25,083 --> 00:06:27,503
Oh, Chloe, you are so cute.

144
00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:30,133
This face here would sell so many books.

145
00:06:30,208 --> 00:06:33,128
You don't want this rotten cantaloupe
driving down sales.

146
00:06:34,208 --> 00:06:37,248
Chloe can't be on the cover.
It's a book about fathers and sons.

147
00:06:37,375 --> 00:06:38,995
So, it's because I'm a girl?

148
00:06:39,250 --> 00:06:40,540
That's sexist.

149
00:06:40,625 --> 00:06:43,075
You're what Pam calls "the problem."

150
00:06:44,083 --> 00:06:47,043
Look, sweetie, this isn't sexist,
it's a book about sons.

151
00:06:47,125 --> 00:06:48,455
And Tyler is my son.

152
00:06:48,583 --> 00:06:51,083
-So, if I was a boy, I could be on it?
-Yes.

153
00:06:51,166 --> 00:06:52,706
Sounds sexist to me.

154
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,498
I see you're getting ready
for your school presentation.

155
00:06:59,583 --> 00:07:01,713
Susan B. Anthony costume is looking great.

156
00:07:01,834 --> 00:07:04,084
Susan B. Anthony wouldn't care
about looking great.

157
00:07:04,250 --> 00:07:06,290
She just cared about women
getting the vote.

158
00:07:06,458 --> 00:07:08,998
But thank you,
'cause I've been working so hard on it.

159
00:07:09,083 --> 00:07:11,333
I remember when I dressed up
like Annie Oakley.

160
00:07:11,417 --> 00:07:14,327
Not for school. It was for a commercial
selling cowhide rugs.

161
00:07:14,583 --> 00:07:15,673
(banjo music)

162
00:07:16,208 --> 00:07:17,668
Howdy, partners.

163
00:07:17,750 --> 00:07:18,880
Ow!

164
00:07:18,959 --> 00:07:21,539
Boy, do we have a range
of great rugs out here on the Rug Ranch.

165
00:07:21,625 --> 00:07:23,325
Ow!

166
00:07:23,417 --> 00:07:24,627
So, mosey on over.

167
00:07:24,709 --> 00:07:26,289
We won't steer you wrong.

168
00:07:26,375 --> 00:07:28,075
Ow! Come on!

169
00:07:28,166 --> 00:07:29,956
Announcer: --down to the Rug Ranch.

170
00:07:31,083 --> 00:07:33,213
Sounds less like Annie Get Your Gun

171
00:07:33,291 --> 00:07:35,501
and more like "Annie,
Get Your Life Together."

172
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,500
It was definitely a wake-up call.

173
00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:41,245
Oh, if you're heading out that way,

174
00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:44,213
can you take this outside
so the sun can give it a weathered look?

175
00:07:44,375 --> 00:07:46,205
It's that kind of attention to detail

176
00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:49,001
that gets you an invite
to the teachers' lounge for coffee cake

177
00:07:49,083 --> 00:07:51,793
and inappropriate gossip
about the other students.

178
00:07:54,750 --> 00:07:56,460
Hey, Avery.

179
00:07:56,750 --> 00:08:00,250
I'm all set to work on
our presentation and...

180
00:08:00,583 --> 00:08:02,253
...I've got wigs!

181
00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,173
And they were free!

182
00:08:05,166 --> 00:08:06,536
They look free.

183
00:08:06,792 --> 00:08:08,292
And they smell like the harbor.

184
00:08:09,333 --> 00:08:10,963
So, how did it go with Wes?

185
00:08:11,041 --> 00:08:12,751
Was it hard?
Did he understand?

186
00:08:12,834 --> 00:08:16,504
Should I call him now to tell him I'll go
out with him or wait till tomorrow?

187
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:19,083
Free from, like, a person
or, like, a lost-and-found?

188
00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:21,254
A person.

189
00:08:21,333 --> 00:08:22,833
And wait till tomorrow.

190
00:08:22,917 --> 00:08:24,877
I actually haven't talked to Wes yet.

191
00:08:25,375 --> 00:08:28,075
Oh? Er...
What's the hold up?

192
00:08:28,166 --> 00:08:29,786
Well, I just wanted to enjoy the fact

193
00:08:29,875 --> 00:08:32,125
that I was asked out on a date
for a couple more hours.

194
00:08:32,208 --> 00:08:33,828
But I'll talk to him, I promise.

195
00:08:34,166 --> 00:08:36,826
Free from a sea captain?
Or a dock worker?

196
00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:38,827
They just reek of low tide.

197
00:08:42,792 --> 00:08:44,542
Hey, can I ask you for some advice?

198
00:08:45,875 --> 00:08:47,875
-Who are you talking to, sweetie?
-You.

199
00:08:47,959 --> 00:08:50,459
Me?
You want to ask me for advice?

200
00:08:50,792 --> 00:08:52,502
( kettle whistles )

201
00:08:55,291 --> 00:08:56,831
So, can I ask you for some advice?

202
00:08:56,917 --> 00:08:58,537
I don't know.
You've never done it before.

203
00:08:58,625 --> 00:09:01,165
You usually go to your dad
because he's the "professional"

204
00:09:01,250 --> 00:09:03,210
and "not prone to emotional outbursts."

205
00:09:04,291 --> 00:09:07,251
Actually, I can't go to Dad this time
because it's about him.

206
00:09:07,458 --> 00:09:10,828
Well, that takes some of the wind
out of my sails, but I can row!

207
00:09:12,083 --> 00:09:14,083
Okay, shoot.
No, wait, let me get a notepad.

208
00:09:14,166 --> 00:09:17,126
No, you know, I want to make eye contact.
I'll just record this on my phone.

209
00:09:17,208 --> 00:09:20,458
I don't know how to do that on my phone.
We'll go old school. You talk, I listen.

210
00:09:20,542 --> 00:09:22,292
I am so nervous.
Are you nervous?

211
00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:26,080
Mom, look.
I really don't want to hurt Dad's feelings

212
00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:28,536
but I don't want to be
on the cover of his book.

213
00:09:28,625 --> 00:09:31,575
This will be the most humiliating thing
that's ever happened to me.

214
00:09:31,667 --> 00:09:34,287
Gosh, my first instinct is
just to tell you to go talk to him,

215
00:09:34,375 --> 00:09:35,625
but that's too easy.

216
00:09:35,709 --> 00:09:38,209
No, I want to advise you so good
that when I'm a grandma,

217
00:09:38,291 --> 00:09:39,921
your children will feel well-advised.

218
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,210
Good one, Nana!

219
00:09:42,417 --> 00:09:44,787
So let me just really think about it
and get back to you.

220
00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:46,707
Okay, Nana.

221
00:09:46,792 --> 00:09:48,082
No, not Nana, not yet.

222
00:09:48,166 --> 00:09:51,036
I know I said that,
but I'm too young, too young.

223
00:09:56,583 --> 00:09:59,423
So here's my idea for our presentation.

224
00:09:59,500 --> 00:10:00,960
I'll be Susan B. Anthony.

225
00:10:02,166 --> 00:10:04,126
Wait, if you have this
all figured out already,

226
00:10:04,208 --> 00:10:05,578
then why'd I
bring these wigs?

227
00:10:05,667 --> 00:10:07,537
I know, it didn't make sense to me either.

228
00:10:08,166 --> 00:10:10,376
I thought we could brainstorm
on ideas together.

229
00:10:10,458 --> 00:10:12,208
Maybe we could be
two of Susan's followers

230
00:10:12,291 --> 00:10:15,131
who tell the story of how she devoted
her life to getting women the vote.

231
00:10:15,208 --> 00:10:16,748
Okay. Or...

232
00:10:16,834 --> 00:10:19,464
I could be Susan B. Anthony
because I have the costume.

233
00:10:21,083 --> 00:10:23,963
Or I could be Susan B. Anthony
because I'm not getting the vote.

234
00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:26,921
Look, Linds.
I'm sorry that I did this without you.

235
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,330
But it's not like
I've got everything figured out.

236
00:10:29,417 --> 00:10:30,627
I just did this costume.

237
00:10:31,125 --> 00:10:32,245
And that costume.

238
00:10:34,750 --> 00:10:36,790
Your dog even has a costume?

239
00:10:36,875 --> 00:10:38,995
Yeah, doesn't he look amazing?

240
00:10:39,125 --> 00:10:42,535
Stan: Well, I've got the figure
to pull off just about anything.

241
00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:45,785
Stan is going to be
Susan B. Anthony's dog.

242
00:10:45,875 --> 00:10:48,785
So, when I recite her line
about how women without the vote

243
00:10:48,875 --> 00:10:51,165
might as well be dogs baying at the moon,

244
00:10:51,250 --> 00:10:53,420
Stan will dramatize it by howling.

245
00:10:53,500 --> 00:10:55,380
We'll get first place.

246
00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:58,918
Ooh, unless Toby Pointer
dresses up as Nixon and does the splits.

247
00:10:58,959 --> 00:11:02,419
It's not historically accurate,
but he can put on a show.

248
00:11:03,125 --> 00:11:05,625
This is just like our presentation
on Lewis and Clark.

249
00:11:05,709 --> 00:11:08,249
When you played Lewis and Clark.
And Sacajawea!

250
00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:09,713
And I was a buffalo.

251
00:11:09,792 --> 00:11:11,882
You hunted me for meat!

252
00:11:12,417 --> 00:11:14,537
You kept us alive, Lindsay.

253
00:11:14,625 --> 00:11:15,995
We used every part of you.

254
00:11:16,792 --> 00:11:18,882
And you have
a very important job this time.

255
00:11:18,959 --> 00:11:21,379
You're gonna be the reporter
who asks me questions.

256
00:11:21,458 --> 00:11:24,458
Well, okay, I guess that could be fun.
What costume will I wear?

257
00:11:24,542 --> 00:11:27,672
Anything you want.
You'll be offstage with a mic.

258
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:30,630
You could even get some more use out of
your buffalo costume.

259
00:11:31,083 --> 00:11:33,213
So, the dog has a bigger part than I do?

260
00:11:33,291 --> 00:11:34,421
How did that happen?

261
00:11:34,500 --> 00:11:37,210
Stan: It was a very
arduous audition process.

262
00:11:37,291 --> 00:11:39,001
Hi, I'm Stan.

263
00:11:39,083 --> 00:11:41,333
I'll be reading the role
of Miss Doralee Gilley

264
00:11:41,417 --> 00:11:44,077
from the 1980 film "The Executary."

265
00:11:45,542 --> 00:11:48,042
I thought I'd dealt with my last pig
when I left the farm,

266
00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:50,915
but I was wrong, Mr. Coleman.
I was wrong!

267
00:11:52,125 --> 00:11:53,745
You're nothing but an eye winkin',

268
00:11:53,834 --> 00:11:55,294
girl chasin', male chauvinist--

269
00:11:55,375 --> 00:11:56,375
Thank you.

270
00:11:56,458 --> 00:11:58,958
I can also do that as a Valley girl,
if you want.

271
00:12:00,125 --> 00:12:04,125
Okay, so I figured out everything before
you got here. Usually you don't mind that.

272
00:12:04,208 --> 00:12:06,538
Well, maybe this time
I want to be Susan B. Anthony.

273
00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:08,880
And maybe I want to go
to the movie with Wes.

274
00:12:09,125 --> 00:12:11,875
( scoffs ) What does Wes
have to do with anything?

275
00:12:11,959 --> 00:12:13,789
I mean, what are we
even arguing about?

276
00:12:13,875 --> 00:12:16,075
The fact that you decide
everything in our friendship.

277
00:12:16,166 --> 00:12:19,206
If you were really my friend, you'd
understand how much this means to me.

278
00:12:19,291 --> 00:12:22,131
I've never had a boyfriend
or even been asked out, you have!

279
00:12:22,208 --> 00:12:25,918
Lindsay, you're gonna get asked out
by tons of boys who I won't like.

280
00:12:26,333 --> 00:12:27,923
What is that supposed to mean?

281
00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,790
It means I liked Wes first!

282
00:12:29,875 --> 00:12:32,205
I mean, you didn't even like him
before he asked you out.

283
00:12:32,291 --> 00:12:34,631
Listen, I always liked Wes,
but I wasn't allowed to

284
00:12:34,709 --> 00:12:37,329
because you liked him.
And you come first in this friendship.

285
00:12:37,417 --> 00:12:39,747
But you had your chance, Avery,
and now it's my turn.

286
00:12:39,834 --> 00:12:41,174
I'm not canceling my date.

287
00:12:41,250 --> 00:12:44,040
I'm going to the movie with Wes
whether you like it or not.

288
00:12:47,792 --> 00:12:49,252
( door shuts )

289
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,290
What just happened?

290
00:12:51,417 --> 00:12:55,877
So, this would be a bad time to tell you
I want to be Susan B. Anthony?

291
00:13:00,667 --> 00:13:02,787
Hey there, cutes.
What do you got there?

292
00:13:02,875 --> 00:13:05,955
This is your book.
I had an idea for the cover.

293
00:13:06,375 --> 00:13:08,875
Oh, look, it's you.

294
00:13:09,291 --> 00:13:11,211
But where am I?
I'm not on here.

295
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:14,331
Exactly.
Stings a little, huh?

296
00:13:15,417 --> 00:13:18,877
Look, Sweetie, I know that you feel bad
not being on my book--

297
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:21,500
Pam says it's not okay
to talk down to someone.

298
00:13:21,625 --> 00:13:23,125
I'm not talking down to you.

299
00:13:23,208 --> 00:13:25,168
You're up there, I'm down here.

300
00:13:25,250 --> 00:13:27,670
Pam taught us the difference
between up and down.

301
00:13:27,750 --> 00:13:29,290
Up is where the glass ceiling is

302
00:13:29,375 --> 00:13:31,575
and down is where the man
wants to keep us.

303
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,790
Well, if you don't want to be down there,

304
00:13:35,875 --> 00:13:36,955
how's this?

305
00:13:37,166 --> 00:13:39,876
I love being lifted.
Now swing me.

306
00:13:39,959 --> 00:13:42,579
Both: Wheee!

307
00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:46,751
Don't tell Pam about this.

308
00:13:48,333 --> 00:13:50,883
I'm starting to wonder
about this teacher of Chloe's.

309
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,540
Pam? I love her.
She asked me to join her drum circle.

310
00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:54,785
Listen, I need some advice.

311
00:13:54,917 --> 00:13:58,037
Let the good drummers take the lead,
you just play quietly in the back.

312
00:13:59,792 --> 00:14:02,462
No, it's advice about giving advice.

313
00:14:02,625 --> 00:14:04,495
But I just realized I can't ask you

314
00:14:04,583 --> 00:14:06,883
for reasons I can't really say,

315
00:14:06,959 --> 00:14:09,039
so I'll just have to work it out myself.

316
00:14:09,125 --> 00:14:10,495
Why don't you ever lift me?

317
00:14:13,417 --> 00:14:15,377
-This is hurting my arms.
-It's hurting my pits.

318
00:14:15,458 --> 00:14:17,748
-Why are we doing this? All right.
-I don't know.

319
00:14:21,917 --> 00:14:22,957
This is crazy.

320
00:14:23,041 --> 00:14:26,251
Lindsay and I haven't even talked
since she stormed out yesterday.

321
00:14:26,333 --> 00:14:27,753
I don't even know what we're doing.

322
00:14:27,875 --> 00:14:31,455
Well, you're playing Susan B. Anthony
and I'm not because my argument

323
00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:33,962
for non-traditional casting
fell on deaf ears.

324
00:14:34,458 --> 00:14:36,828
I guess we'll just get up
there and do our thing.

325
00:14:36,917 --> 00:14:40,877
Then, maybe Lindsay and I can talk
and figure out this whole Wes situation.

326
00:14:40,959 --> 00:14:43,329
Hopefully, she'll do the right thing
and bow out.

327
00:14:43,417 --> 00:14:45,577
( laughs )

328
00:14:45,792 --> 00:14:47,502
It sounded like you said "bow wow."

329
00:14:51,750 --> 00:14:54,080
Oh, Chloe, your class came to see this?

330
00:14:54,208 --> 00:14:56,998
Yep, Pam thought it would be
a great lesson for our class.

331
00:14:57,083 --> 00:14:59,333
When I told her you were
playing Susan B. Anthony,

332
00:14:59,417 --> 00:15:01,377
she got so excited,
she picked me up.

333
00:15:01,458 --> 00:15:03,418
I'm getting lifted a lot lately.

334
00:15:03,500 --> 00:15:05,210
It's pretty sweet.

335
00:15:06,875 --> 00:15:08,955
And Max,
you're not even dressed up.

336
00:15:09,083 --> 00:15:11,793
I'm Secret Service protecting
all the Presidents here.

337
00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:13,915
Oh-oh, John Wilkes Booth is on the move.

338
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,920
Nah, I don't want to mess with history.

339
00:15:16,792 --> 00:15:19,172
Well, both of you wish me luck.

340
00:15:19,250 --> 00:15:21,710
Ooh, Nixon's going on.
I'm up next.

341
00:15:21,792 --> 00:15:24,042
Oh, he's doing the splits.

342
00:15:24,291 --> 00:15:25,671
( applause )

343
00:15:26,083 --> 00:15:28,713
That's not historically accurate!

344
00:15:30,125 --> 00:15:32,915
Ha! Not so limber now,
are you, Nixon?

345
00:15:34,041 --> 00:15:37,081
Wait, the splits was a metaphor
for his resignation.

346
00:15:37,166 --> 00:15:38,666
How did I not see that before?

347
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,960
( clapping ) Brilliant work, Toby!

348
00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:44,749
Hello, other Susan.

349
00:15:46,959 --> 00:15:49,579
Lindsay? What are you doing
wearing that costume?

350
00:15:49,667 --> 00:15:50,827
I'm Susan B. Anthony.

351
00:15:50,959 --> 00:15:52,959
No. I'm Susan B. Anthony.

352
00:15:53,041 --> 00:15:55,251
You're her evil twin
in an overpriced wig.

353
00:15:55,333 --> 00:15:57,293
At least that's what it says
in my speech.

354
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,920
That's not historically accurate!

355
00:16:00,083 --> 00:16:03,173
Wait, unless it's a metaphor--
No, that's not historically accurate!

356
00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:04,750
And neither is that hat!

357
00:16:05,125 --> 00:16:06,495
( nervous laugh )

358
00:16:07,542 --> 00:16:09,212
Stan: None of this is in the script.

359
00:16:09,291 --> 00:16:11,251
What's my cue?
I might have missed it.

360
00:16:11,333 --> 00:16:13,423
When do I howl?
I'd better do it now.

361
00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:15,000
( groans )

362
00:16:15,250 --> 00:16:16,380
( laughter )

363
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,960
Ah! Indigestion!

364
00:16:19,041 --> 00:16:20,381
This is so embarrassing.

365
00:16:20,458 --> 00:16:23,828
Why did I eat Oliver Wendell Holmes'
breakfast burrito?

366
00:16:24,333 --> 00:16:26,713
-He liked me first.
-He likes me now.

367
00:16:26,792 --> 00:16:28,632
Oh, we'll see.
I'm going out with him!

368
00:16:28,709 --> 00:16:30,289
There's nothing you can do about it.

369
00:16:30,375 --> 00:16:33,455
Oh, yeah? All I have to do
is explain the misunderstanding,

370
00:16:33,542 --> 00:16:34,752
and you guys are over!

371
00:16:34,875 --> 00:16:37,495
No wonder it took us
so long to get the vote.

372
00:16:42,125 --> 00:16:43,325
What do you think
about my outfit, Stan?

373
00:16:43,417 --> 00:16:45,077
I want to look cute
when I tell Wes

374
00:16:45,166 --> 00:16:47,166
that I'll go out with him
and Lindsay's a jerk!

375
00:16:47,250 --> 00:16:48,880
But not like I'm trying to look cute.

376
00:16:49,250 --> 00:16:52,670
You look great, but I can't believe
you're doing this to Lindsay.

377
00:16:52,875 --> 00:16:54,375
She's your best friend.

378
00:16:54,458 --> 00:16:57,248
I mean, I'm your best friend.
I am your best friend, right?

379
00:16:57,333 --> 00:16:59,043
Say it.
And pet me while you say it.

380
00:17:00,250 --> 00:17:02,670
Yes, you're my best friend, Stan.

381
00:17:02,959 --> 00:17:05,249
You'd never betray me like Lindsay did.

382
00:17:05,542 --> 00:17:08,542
She went after the boy I liked.
She is a bad friend.

383
00:17:08,750 --> 00:17:11,920
You know, with dogs,
every pack has an alpha who's in charge.

384
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:15,330
And sometimes another dog steps up
and tries to become the alpha.

385
00:17:15,417 --> 00:17:17,747
And the alpha needs to put
that dog in its place.

386
00:17:17,834 --> 00:17:19,174
Exactly.

387
00:17:19,250 --> 00:17:20,830
I'm the leader,
he's fighting me,

388
00:17:20,917 --> 00:17:22,707
and I need to put her in her place.

389
00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:24,332
That is a great point, Stan.

390
00:17:24,417 --> 00:17:26,707
No! My point is
you're not dogs.

391
00:17:26,792 --> 00:17:28,382
Stop acting like it.

392
00:17:28,458 --> 00:17:31,078
Friendship isn't about who's in charge.
It's a two-way street.

393
00:17:31,166 --> 00:17:33,706
I liked the alpha dog thing
better a minute ago

394
00:17:33,792 --> 00:17:36,002
when I thought it was
supporting my position.

395
00:17:36,083 --> 00:17:38,173
I take back a little bit of my petting.

396
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,458
You can't.

397
00:17:39,542 --> 00:17:41,252
The tingle is already in my fur.

398
00:17:41,959 --> 00:17:43,499
Just think about this, Avery.

399
00:17:43,583 --> 00:17:47,083
If you have to picture your life
with only Wes or Lindsay in it,

400
00:17:47,208 --> 00:17:48,578
who's in that picture?

401
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:55,920
Mom, you around?
Still need that advice.

402
00:17:57,250 --> 00:17:59,330
Mom, are you hiding behind the curtains?

403
00:17:59,417 --> 00:18:01,247
No, I'm just busy.
Can't talk to you now.

404
00:18:01,417 --> 00:18:04,127
Busy...
hiding behind the curtains?

405
00:18:05,083 --> 00:18:07,883
I'm not hiding.
This is my thinking spot.

406
00:18:07,959 --> 00:18:09,999
I'm thinking about the advice
I'm gonna give you,

407
00:18:10,083 --> 00:18:13,083
so if you want good advice,
you just need to leave me alone to think.

408
00:18:13,709 --> 00:18:15,539
Behind the curtains?

409
00:18:16,834 --> 00:18:19,674
You know, I had a thought,
you just distracted me from it.

410
00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:22,460
Now I have to start all over again.
I hope you're happy.

411
00:18:29,458 --> 00:18:31,958
I think she's lying about
getting ideas back here.

412
00:18:32,083 --> 00:18:36,753
( gasps ) Or did standing back here
give me the clarity to see that?

413
00:18:36,834 --> 00:18:38,254
Whoa.

414
00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:42,250
Hey, just poking my head in,
seeing if you needed anything.

415
00:18:42,333 --> 00:18:43,633
Actually, I could go for--

416
00:18:43,709 --> 00:18:45,879
Yeah, I don't really care
if you need anything.

417
00:18:45,959 --> 00:18:48,289
This advice thing is really
doing a number on me.

418
00:18:48,375 --> 00:18:49,625
So, let me try this again.

419
00:18:49,792 --> 00:18:52,212
( clears throat )
Hypothetically speaking,

420
00:18:52,291 --> 00:18:54,171
if there was someone named Tyler

421
00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:56,290
who didn't want to be
on the cover of your book

422
00:18:56,375 --> 00:18:59,125
but didn't want to hurt your feelings,
what would you advise?

423
00:18:59,458 --> 00:19:01,578
That you look up the word hypothetically.

424
00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:05,882
-Tyler doesn't want to be on my book?
-Well, let's focus on the positive.

425
00:19:05,959 --> 00:19:08,129
He came to me for advice.
Isn't that great?

426
00:19:08,667 --> 00:19:10,827
Tyler, get in here!
I want to talk to you!

427
00:19:10,959 --> 00:19:13,459
I was gonna say that!
That's the advice I was gonna give.

428
00:19:13,542 --> 00:19:15,082
Why didn't I just go with my gut?

429
00:19:15,166 --> 00:19:16,956
Talk to your father.
That's my advice.

430
00:19:17,041 --> 00:19:19,881
I did that. Plenty more
where that came from. Come to me anytime.

431
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,170
-Tyler, take a seat.
-I'm gonna stay and watch.

432
00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:25,670
It was my advice, so I get to.
Don't mess this up, Bennett.

433
00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:28,250
Got a lot riding on it.
And that's the last thing I'm gonna say.

434
00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:29,463
I doubt it.

435
00:19:31,792 --> 00:19:36,172
Listen, Son, if you don't want to be
on the cover of my book, that's fine.

436
00:19:36,250 --> 00:19:37,630
You can always come talk to me.

437
00:19:37,709 --> 00:19:39,379
My advice.

438
00:19:40,250 --> 00:19:45,130
But, Dad, sometimes parents push kids
to do things they don't really want to do.

439
00:19:45,208 --> 00:19:49,418
That creates a sense of obligation
which can push the father and son apart.

440
00:19:49,667 --> 00:19:52,577
That's from my book.
You read my book?

441
00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:55,169
Yeah, I read all your books.

442
00:19:55,250 --> 00:19:57,290
-You do?
-Of course.

443
00:19:57,792 --> 00:19:58,962
You're my dad.

444
00:19:59,583 --> 00:20:03,333
Wow, this means a lot to me, Son.

445
00:20:03,750 --> 00:20:05,460
Why didn't you ever mention it?

446
00:20:05,875 --> 00:20:08,825
'Cause I knew you'd get all,
"Wow, this means a lot to me, Son."

447
00:20:09,041 --> 00:20:12,381
-Did you know I was gonna do this?
-( grunts ) Yes.

448
00:20:12,583 --> 00:20:16,633
This is the best advice
anyone has ever given.

449
00:20:21,625 --> 00:20:22,955
( slow music playing )

450
00:20:33,375 --> 00:20:34,705
( music intensifies )

451
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:56,290
Mm...This jicama is really good.

452
00:20:56,375 --> 00:20:59,785
Yeah, finally a vegetable for people
who find celery too rich.

453
00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:03,330
Thanks for letting me take the lead
on the snacks tonight.

454
00:21:03,417 --> 00:21:04,827
It means a lot that you did that.

455
00:21:05,041 --> 00:21:08,331
-Well, friendship is a two-way street.
-Yeah.

456
00:21:08,709 --> 00:21:10,289
But this jicama is terrible.

457
00:21:10,375 --> 00:21:12,705
Why did I put it in the bag with my wigs?

458
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,540
( all spit out )

459
00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:18,792
Luckily, I brought my just-in-case melon.

460
00:21:18,875 --> 00:21:20,785
You know, just in case.
( chuckles )

461
00:21:21,083 --> 00:21:23,833
Oh, thank goodness.
You're a good friend.

462
00:21:24,041 --> 00:21:26,501
I couldn't imagine us
ever not being friends.

463
00:21:26,583 --> 00:21:29,923
I'm just trying to imagine the movie
I can't hear with all this talking.

464
00:21:30,125 --> 00:21:32,075
-All: Sshh!
-Me?

465
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:35,330
I don't know what happened with Lindsay.

466
00:21:35,417 --> 00:21:36,917
But it's for the best.

467
00:21:37,250 --> 00:21:39,330
Avery is the one
I really wanted to go with.

468
00:21:39,667 --> 00:21:41,207
( soft acoustic music plays )

469
00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:46,831
Stan: I'm glad that Avery and Lindsay
patched things up,

470
00:21:46,917 --> 00:21:48,417
and that I was able to help a little.

471
00:21:48,542 --> 00:21:50,292
My only regret is that unfortunate

472
00:21:50,375 --> 00:21:53,325
howl mishap
at the Historical People Pageant.

473
00:21:53,667 --> 00:21:55,577
But I did get a chance to redeem myself

474
00:21:55,667 --> 00:21:58,667
at the movie in the park
when I saw the full moon.

475
00:21:59,041 --> 00:22:00,381
( groans )

476
00:22:00,500 --> 00:22:03,670
Schnauzer!
Why did I eat so much jicama?

477
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:10,042
-Just let me give you some advice!
-I don't need any advice!

478
00:22:10,125 --> 00:22:11,915
-Everyone needs advice!
-Not me!

479
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,130
Don't run on the stairs!
Ha! There's some advice!

480
00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:15,958
That's not advice, that's mothering!

481
00:22:17,208 --> 00:22:19,168
I'm counting it.

482
00:22:21,750 --> 00:22:25,000
Oh, Mom wants to give
advice to feel needed.

483
00:22:25,750 --> 00:22:27,420
Thanks, Curtain.

484
00:22:28,250 --> 00:22:29,380
( music playing )

485
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:32,210
( boing )