1
00:01:34,843 --> 00:01:38,019
<i>We moved here about a month ago.</i>

2
00:01:38,020 --> 00:01:40,587
<i>My parents, they said it'd be better</i>

3
00:01:40,588 --> 00:01:43,285
<i>for me and my brother Eric.</i>

4
00:01:43,286 --> 00:01:45,854
<i>They always say that
when they want something.</i>

5
00:01:46,985 --> 00:01:49,465
<i>Everything's different.</i>

6
00:01:49,466 --> 00:01:51,859
<i>All the streets had different names,</i>

7
00:01:51,860 --> 00:01:54,601
<i>all my friends were far away.</i>

8
00:01:54,602 --> 00:01:57,038
<i>I was miserable.</i>

9
00:01:57,039 --> 00:01:59,345
<i>I hated it.</i>

10
00:01:59,346 --> 00:02:03,088
<i>Till I met my first friend--
Maurice.</i>

11
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:09,790
<i>I'll never, ever have
a friend like him again.</i>

12
00:03:00,363 --> 00:03:02,321
<i>Damn it, I hate this.</i>

13
00:03:02,322 --> 00:03:04,453
<i>You wanted a bigger house,
a fixer-upper.</i>

14
00:03:04,454 --> 00:03:06,325
<i>I wanted something
both of us could do together,</i>

15
00:03:06,326 --> 00:03:08,414
<i>and you're never here.</i>

16
00:03:08,415 --> 00:03:10,329
<i>You think I like commuting
two hours to a job I hate?</i>

17
00:03:10,330 --> 00:03:12,026
<i>I thought things would be different here.</i>

18
00:03:12,027 --> 00:03:13,723
<i>I thought we'd spend time together.</i>

19
00:03:13,724 --> 00:03:16,465
<i>You're the one who stopped working.</i>

20
00:03:16,466 --> 00:03:18,728
- <i>You think I like being a stranger to my kids?
- I don't know.</i>

21
00:03:18,729 --> 00:03:20,774
<i>Oh, come on,
I'm not a monster, I'm a man.</i>

22
00:03:20,775 --> 00:03:22,515
<i>I'm not sure there's a big difference.</i>

23
00:03:22,516 --> 00:03:24,734
<i>Great, now I'm a monster?</i>

24
00:03:24,735 --> 00:03:27,085
<i>Look, I just wish you'd
be here when you're here.</i>

25
00:03:51,849 --> 00:03:54,851
Hi, my name's Sam Yahay,
and welcome to Channel 98

26
00:03:54,852 --> 00:03:57,245
cable access,
"All About Chicks."

27
00:03:57,246 --> 00:04:00,161
- Today, my guest is Lovey.
- Lani.

28
00:04:00,162 --> 00:04:01,684
<i>Oh, sorry, Lani, right.</i>

29
00:04:01,685 --> 00:04:03,425
<i>So, Lani, tell me,
where are you from?</i>

30
00:04:03,426 --> 00:04:07,299
I'm from Fort Lauderdale,
but I'm dying to go to LA.

31
00:04:07,300 --> 00:04:09,126
- Mommy!
<i>- Yeah, right.</i>

32
00:04:09,127 --> 00:04:11,781
- <i>So, uh, Lani...
- Mommy!</i>

33
00:04:11,782 --> 00:04:14,382
<i>What do you think about the world economy?</i>

34
00:04:17,832 --> 00:04:21,356
<i>Mommy! Mommy,
Mommy, a monster!</i>

35
00:04:21,357 --> 00:04:25,229
<i>A monster!
Mommy, Mommy, a monster!</i>

36
00:04:25,230 --> 00:04:26,709
<i>A monster!</i>

37
00:04:26,710 --> 00:04:29,321
Mom, a monster!

38
00:04:29,322 --> 00:04:31,497
Oh, honey, are you all right?

39
00:04:31,498 --> 00:04:35,239
Okay, now, there was a monster in your dream.

40
00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:36,676
I was wide awake.

41
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,852
Oh, well, it was probably
just your mommy snoring.

42
00:04:38,853 --> 00:04:41,681
This is no joke, Dad.
There was a real monster.

43
00:04:41,682 --> 00:04:43,247
Really?

44
00:04:43,248 --> 00:04:45,206
Honey, there's no such thing as monsters.

45
00:04:45,207 --> 00:04:48,818
It ran in from the hall,
grabbed my ankle, and slid under my bed.

46
00:04:48,819 --> 00:04:51,691
- Under the bed?
- Uh-huh.

47
00:04:51,692 --> 00:04:55,521
- Under the bed?
- <i>Yeah.</i>

48
00:04:55,522 --> 00:04:57,261
No, Dad, don't!

49
00:05:03,225 --> 00:05:06,575
Yuck.

50
00:05:06,576 --> 00:05:08,403
- No monsters.
- Sick.

51
00:05:08,404 --> 00:05:11,624
I guess all the dust bunnies scared him away.

52
00:05:11,625 --> 00:05:14,714
- Bunny?
- No, no, no bunnies, no monsters.

53
00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:16,237
There is nothing under your bed.

54
00:05:16,238 --> 00:05:18,021
Now, why don't you just go to sleep, okay?

55
00:05:18,022 --> 00:05:19,545
Can I have the flashlight?

56
00:05:19,546 --> 00:05:21,329
Sure, honey.
Would you get it?

57
00:05:21,330 --> 00:05:24,507
Honey, I thought we--
I'll get the, uh...

58
00:05:26,204 --> 00:05:28,118
get the flashlight.

59
00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:30,470
Okay, come on, tuck up.

60
00:05:33,386 --> 00:05:35,343
<i>You know, I bet those monsters
are more afraid of you</i>

61
00:05:35,344 --> 00:05:36,997
than you are of them.

62
00:05:36,998 --> 00:05:38,433
I know.

63
00:05:38,434 --> 00:05:39,913
Once you realize they don't exist--

64
00:05:39,914 --> 00:05:42,002
poof-- they disappear.

65
00:05:42,003 --> 00:05:45,006
Now, that's a lot of power.

66
00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:54,536
Glen...

67
00:05:59,412 --> 00:06:01,674
- Don't burn up the batteries, okay?
- Dad...

68
00:06:01,675 --> 00:06:03,980
- I won't.
- Good night, sweetheart.

69
00:06:03,981 --> 00:06:05,417
All right, have a good sleep.

70
00:06:05,418 --> 00:06:06,679
Good night, Mom.
Good night, Dad.

71
00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:08,464
<i>Good night, honey.</i>

72
00:06:12,512 --> 00:06:14,469
Do you think he heard us?

73
00:06:14,470 --> 00:06:17,430
Of course he heard us.
That's what scared him.

74
00:06:49,679 --> 00:06:52,594
<i>Eric, did you take your vitamins?</i>

75
00:06:52,595 --> 00:06:55,597
- Yes.
- Good boy.

76
00:06:55,598 --> 00:06:58,905
Okay, no trading for Twinkies today.

77
00:06:58,906 --> 00:07:01,603
Oh, come on, Mom.
I don't do that.

78
00:07:07,567 --> 00:07:10,438
Then you carry over the one.

79
00:07:10,439 --> 00:07:12,005
- Hi, Dad. Hey, Mom.
- Good morning.

80
00:07:12,006 --> 00:07:14,442
Hi, honey.

81
00:07:14,443 --> 00:07:16,009
Hope whatever you watched on TV last night

82
00:07:16,010 --> 00:07:18,533
was worth your allowance and two weeks of TV.

83
00:07:18,534 --> 00:07:20,317
- Huh?
- "Huh"?

84
00:07:20,318 --> 00:07:22,059
We found the sandwich, Brian.

85
00:07:23,583 --> 00:07:26,759
- What sandwich?
- Brian Arthur Stevenson,

86
00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:28,412
you are the only person in this family

87
00:07:28,413 --> 00:07:30,676
who eats peanut butter and onion sandwiches.

88
00:07:30,677 --> 00:07:32,634
You think every time you get caught

89
00:07:32,635 --> 00:07:34,897
you can just lie your way out of it?

90
00:07:34,898 --> 00:07:37,421
<i>Damn.</i>

91
00:07:37,422 --> 00:07:39,206
Damn it.

92
00:07:39,207 --> 00:07:40,860
The plumber's coming next week.

93
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:43,210
Great, I can leave him all these dishes.

94
00:07:43,211 --> 00:07:46,605
<i>Just keep telling yourself
it's our dream house.</i>

95
00:07:46,606 --> 00:07:49,346
It's our dream house,
it's our dream house,

96
00:07:49,347 --> 00:07:51,174
it's our dream house.

97
00:07:51,175 --> 00:07:52,786
Ugh.

98
00:08:07,322 --> 00:08:09,845
You're dead, mister.

99
00:08:09,846 --> 00:08:12,848
- Hey, I didn't do anything.
- Just like the sandwich?

100
00:08:12,849 --> 00:08:15,547
All right, all right, fine.
I admit it, I did have a sandwich,

101
00:08:15,548 --> 00:08:18,027
but I did not have any ice cream.

102
00:08:18,028 --> 00:08:20,377
<i>Why do you always blame everything on me?</i>

103
00:08:20,378 --> 00:08:23,076
Hey, well, somebody put scuff marks
on the door kicking them open

104
00:08:23,077 --> 00:08:25,644
and somebody puts gum under the table.

105
00:08:25,645 --> 00:08:28,124
Brian, you are old enough
to know the difference

106
00:08:28,125 --> 00:08:29,952
between right and wrong.

107
00:08:29,953 --> 00:08:31,781
Why don't you start acting it?

108
00:08:33,348 --> 00:08:36,133
"Why don't you start acting it," Dad?

109
00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:49,276
Look at it this way.
The day can only get better.

110
00:08:49,277 --> 00:08:52,585
Great, then can I stay home from school?

111
00:08:54,978 --> 00:08:56,936
Are you sorry we moved?

112
00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:59,112
I hate it here.

113
00:08:59,113 --> 00:09:01,462
Guess you miss your friends, huh?

114
00:09:01,463 --> 00:09:03,465
Mom, it's killing me.

115
00:09:05,162 --> 00:09:06,902
You know, the realtor, Mr. Coleman,

116
00:09:06,903 --> 00:09:08,121
he had a kid about your age.

117
00:09:08,122 --> 00:09:09,775
Ronnie Coleman's a Toad.

118
00:09:09,776 --> 00:09:11,777
Well, he seemed like a nice kid to me.

119
00:09:11,778 --> 00:09:15,563
Great, then you can invite him
over for milk and dead flies.

120
00:09:15,564 --> 00:09:18,653
I would, but your father ate 'em all.

121
00:09:20,482 --> 00:09:22,483
<i>The stock market tumbled sharply</i>

122
00:09:22,484 --> 00:09:24,616
<i>as the slide most were
anticipating finally happened.</i>

123
00:09:24,617 --> 00:09:28,271
- <i>The Dow Jones Industrial Average...
- Brian!</i>

124
00:09:34,539 --> 00:09:37,280
My bike!
You ran over it!

125
00:09:37,281 --> 00:09:38,847
My car.

126
00:09:38,848 --> 00:09:40,588
Whose fault is this, Brian?

127
00:09:40,589 --> 00:09:42,459
Uh-uh, no way.

128
00:09:42,460 --> 00:09:44,679
I parked it right over there.
Right there.

129
00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:46,725
Oh, right, right.
So, before I got in the car,

130
00:09:46,726 --> 00:09:49,162
I went around and put the bike there myself?
Forget it, Charlie.

131
00:09:49,163 --> 00:09:52,644
<i>First my shirt, now this.
I'm 15 minutes late here.</i>

132
00:09:52,645 --> 00:09:54,515
What do you expect me to do with my bike?

133
00:09:54,516 --> 00:09:56,125
Look, it--
it's destroyed!

134
00:09:56,126 --> 00:09:58,562
Well, you're gonna have
to learn to ride it like that.

135
00:09:58,563 --> 00:10:01,609
You're grounded for two weeks,
no TV for three,

136
00:10:01,610 --> 00:10:04,046
and you can forget about your
allowance till that car is paid up.

137
00:10:04,047 --> 00:10:05,569
Glen, isn't that a little rough?

138
00:10:05,570 --> 00:10:07,267
Holly, don't make me the villain here.

139
00:10:07,268 --> 00:10:09,878
So, Dad, you mean to tell me
that my bike is ruined

140
00:10:09,879 --> 00:10:11,706
and your car has a little dent in it,

141
00:10:11,707 --> 00:10:14,274
I'm being punished?
That's not fair!

142
00:10:14,275 --> 00:10:18,147
Somebody put it there, Brian.

143
00:10:18,148 --> 00:10:20,106
<i>And it didn't slime you.
You're sure?</i>

144
00:10:20,107 --> 00:10:23,109
Sure I'm sure.
I think I'd know if I was slimed.

145
00:10:23,110 --> 00:10:25,024
And it didn't go into the closet?

146
00:10:25,025 --> 00:10:27,679
You know, like,
to rip something off?

147
00:10:27,680 --> 00:10:30,856
- Nope.
- What about your desk?

148
00:10:30,857 --> 00:10:33,249
It didn't do your geography homework, did it?

149
00:10:33,250 --> 00:10:34,642
Look, Todd,

150
00:10:34,643 --> 00:10:36,688
I never would've told you about this,
but--

151
00:10:36,689 --> 00:10:38,559
Okay, all right.

152
00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:40,909
So, this is an exclusively
under-the-bed phenomenon

153
00:10:40,910 --> 00:10:42,432
we're dealing with here.

154
00:10:42,433 --> 00:10:45,915
That's right,
exclusively under <i>my</i> bed.

155
00:10:49,789 --> 00:10:51,659
It really was a monster.

156
00:10:51,660 --> 00:10:53,617
Really?
What did it look like?

157
00:10:53,618 --> 00:10:55,489
I don't know.

158
00:10:55,490 --> 00:10:56,882
Hi, Kiersten.

159
00:10:56,883 --> 00:10:58,928
Hi.

160
00:11:07,763 --> 00:11:08,894
<i>Slow down!</i>

161
00:11:08,895 --> 00:11:10,286
Eric, you Toad.

162
00:11:10,287 --> 00:11:12,071
Why aren't you riding your bike?

163
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:15,465
What bike? Dad ran over it
because you left it in the driveway.

164
00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:17,859
No, way.
Your bike?

165
00:11:17,860 --> 00:11:20,427
- No, way!
- Look, I put it away.

166
00:11:20,428 --> 00:11:22,168
Mom and Dad sure wouldn't touch it.

167
00:11:22,169 --> 00:11:24,213
So that only leaves you.

168
00:11:24,214 --> 00:11:25,780
I didn't touch your bike.

169
00:11:25,781 --> 00:11:27,695
I can hardly reach the pedals.

170
00:11:27,696 --> 00:11:30,002
All right, that's it.
You lie to me, you starve.

171
00:11:30,003 --> 00:11:33,832
My lunch!
You jerk, I didn't do anything!

172
00:11:33,833 --> 00:11:36,051
Oh, yeah, right.
And what about that ice cream?

173
00:11:36,052 --> 00:11:37,923
You snuck some ice cream last night,
too, didn't ya?

174
00:11:37,924 --> 00:11:39,881
Forget it.
Don't blame it on me.

175
00:11:39,882 --> 00:11:42,449
- The monster.
- That's it.

176
00:11:42,450 --> 00:11:45,626
- That's what it was doing.
- There are no monsters.

177
00:11:47,411 --> 00:11:49,891
- Who's Eric?
<i>- Uh-oh.</i>

178
00:11:49,892 --> 00:11:54,853
Who's the Eric who threw his lunch at me?

179
00:11:54,854 --> 00:11:57,159
He did.

180
00:11:57,160 --> 00:11:59,640
You Eric?

181
00:11:59,641 --> 00:12:03,036
You want this back?

182
00:12:04,472 --> 00:12:05,994
<i>Sit down back there!</i>

183
00:12:05,995 --> 00:12:08,475
Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

184
00:12:08,476 --> 00:12:10,173
Like Bigfoot.

185
00:12:11,871 --> 00:12:14,350
Maybe I will.

186
00:12:18,878 --> 00:12:20,661
Get back in your seats

187
00:12:20,662 --> 00:12:23,142
or I'll destroy every one of you!

188
00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:25,144
You're dead meat, Stevenson.

189
00:12:29,845 --> 00:12:31,281
Yeah.

190
00:12:32,674 --> 00:12:34,109
Ow!

191
00:12:34,110 --> 00:12:36,459
<i>Stevenson!</i>

192
00:12:36,460 --> 00:12:38,853
If it's the last thing I do today,
I'm gonna make you eat this shirt.

193
00:12:38,854 --> 00:12:40,768
Fight, fight, fight, fight.

194
00:12:40,769 --> 00:12:43,553
Listen, Coleman, I'm surprised
you haven't eaten it already.

195
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:46,339
- Huh? Huh?
- Why you...

196
00:12:46,340 --> 00:12:48,037
<i>Nail his head!</i>

197
00:12:49,212 --> 00:12:51,692
The principal!

198
00:12:51,693 --> 00:12:53,825
<i>Cool it, man.
Here comes Turner!</i>

199
00:12:53,826 --> 00:12:55,391
<i>Come on, cool it, guys.</i>

200
00:12:55,392 --> 00:12:57,350
Break it up.
Break it up.

201
00:12:57,351 --> 00:12:59,656
Break it up!

202
00:12:59,657 --> 00:13:01,876
What is going on here?

203
00:13:01,877 --> 00:13:04,923
Sir, I was just showing Brian
what he did to my shirt

204
00:13:04,924 --> 00:13:08,361
- and <i>he</i> pushed me away.
- Oh, come on--

205
00:13:08,362 --> 00:13:12,147
- Stevenson, you're new here, aren't you?
- Yes, sir.

206
00:13:12,148 --> 00:13:15,020
Well, I think we'd better
have a little talk in my office.

207
00:13:15,021 --> 00:13:17,326
You have rules to learn.

208
00:13:17,327 --> 00:13:20,243
Toodles, Bri.

209
00:13:37,217 --> 00:13:39,696
Whoa, there's enough power in here

210
00:13:39,697 --> 00:13:41,481
to light up Yankee Stadium.

211
00:13:41,482 --> 00:13:44,006
- Already out on parole?
- Very funny.

212
00:13:54,364 --> 00:13:56,104
So what's up, Miss Deveaux?

213
00:13:56,105 --> 00:13:58,106
You really wanna know
or you're just askin'?

214
00:13:58,107 --> 00:14:01,153
I really wanna know.

215
00:14:02,938 --> 00:14:05,549
Disgusting.
Your face may corrode the camera.

216
00:14:06,768 --> 00:14:09,901
Whoa.
This is cool.

217
00:14:09,902 --> 00:14:11,903
Don't touch.
It's fragile.

218
00:14:11,904 --> 00:14:13,948
It's a night-blooming cactus.

219
00:14:13,949 --> 00:14:15,994
I wanna see if artificial sunlight

220
00:14:15,995 --> 00:14:17,952
changes its normal blooming pattern.

221
00:14:17,953 --> 00:14:19,911
<i>I'm training it to bloom in the daytime.</i>

222
00:14:19,912 --> 00:14:24,133
To be scientific,
I document the results with Polaroids.

223
00:14:27,832 --> 00:14:29,964
Hey, you know what?

224
00:14:29,965 --> 00:14:33,881
If you mounted the camera in one spot,
like, upside down,

225
00:14:33,882 --> 00:14:36,231
you could take a whole bunch of pictures

226
00:14:36,232 --> 00:14:39,235
and make them into like--
you know, like a movie.

227
00:14:41,455 --> 00:14:43,500
Here, look.

228
00:14:45,676 --> 00:14:47,808
Like time-lapse photography.

229
00:14:47,809 --> 00:14:51,725
- That's great.
- Yeah, um, so I guess it's all set.

230
00:14:51,726 --> 00:14:53,727
Me and you will team up on the project.

231
00:14:53,728 --> 00:14:55,555
Forget it, Brian.
I'll end up doing all the work.

232
00:14:55,556 --> 00:14:58,079
No chance.
Find somebody else to leech off of.

233
00:14:58,080 --> 00:14:59,689
Hey, all right.
You know what?

234
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,213
Think about it, take your time.

235
00:15:01,214 --> 00:15:02,606
You'll probably change your mind.

236
00:15:31,809 --> 00:15:35,029
Hey, if you say there's no monster,

237
00:15:35,030 --> 00:15:36,726
then switch rooms with me.

238
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:39,164
- What?
- Switch rooms with me.

239
00:15:39,165 --> 00:15:41,253
Yeah, you sleep in Eric's room

240
00:15:41,254 --> 00:15:42,819
and he sleeps in your room.

241
00:15:42,820 --> 00:15:45,387
- You just want my room.
- Nuh-uh.

242
00:15:45,388 --> 00:15:47,041
I want you to prove me wrong.

243
00:15:47,042 --> 00:15:49,783
- I dare you to switch rooms.
- Double dare.

244
00:15:49,784 --> 00:15:54,179
- Relax, Toad.
- I double dare you to switch rooms.

245
00:15:54,180 --> 00:15:57,052
- Will you guys take a hike?
<i>- I'll pay you.</i>

246
00:15:58,445 --> 00:16:00,185
Okay, Toad.

247
00:16:00,186 --> 00:16:03,057
Brian, you gotta stay the whole night

248
00:16:03,058 --> 00:16:06,539
<i>and you gotta sleep with your
legs sticking out of the covers.</i>

249
00:16:06,540 --> 00:16:09,194
And you have to have the door closed.

250
00:16:09,195 --> 00:16:11,283
Oh, God, please, stop.

251
00:16:11,284 --> 00:16:14,068
I can't take it.
You're frightening me.

252
00:16:14,069 --> 00:16:15,375
Eric, Todd, it's time for bed.

253
00:16:17,942 --> 00:16:20,467
Hey, you guys,
don't touch anything in my room.

254
00:16:22,251 --> 00:16:24,557
- Good night, Dad.
- Good night, Mr. Stevenson.

255
00:16:24,558 --> 00:16:27,299
Good night.

256
00:16:27,300 --> 00:16:30,085
- Hey, Dad.
- Hey, Bri.

257
00:16:32,131 --> 00:16:33,783
You know, I think it's really nice of you

258
00:16:33,784 --> 00:16:35,394
to switch rooms with Eric like this.

259
00:16:35,395 --> 00:16:37,222
- I'm proud of you.
- Thanks.

260
00:16:37,223 --> 00:16:38,658
Yeah.

261
00:16:38,659 --> 00:16:40,529
Personally, I think
you guys are both kinda nuts

262
00:16:40,530 --> 00:16:43,445
about this,
uh, monster thing,

263
00:16:43,446 --> 00:16:46,274
- but if you happen to see him tonight...
- Yeah?

264
00:16:46,275 --> 00:16:48,885
...could you maybe get me some autographs or--

265
00:16:48,886 --> 00:16:50,800
Okay, okay.
Yes!

266
00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:53,194
Okay, I'll get your autographs!
Stop tickling!

267
00:16:53,195 --> 00:16:56,241
<i>So the girl's waiting
for her roommate to get back.</i>

268
00:16:56,242 --> 00:16:58,504
<i>She's getting real scared.</i>

269
00:16:58,505 --> 00:17:02,203
Oh, yeah, her room's on the second floor.

270
00:17:02,204 --> 00:17:03,857
So she's waiting.

271
00:17:03,858 --> 00:17:05,902
It's probably the darkest night ever.

272
00:17:05,903 --> 00:17:10,472
Suddenly, from outside she hears,
"Thump-thump.

273
00:17:10,473 --> 00:17:13,910
<i>Thump-thump."
So she gets real brave.</i>

274
00:17:13,911 --> 00:17:15,869
She inches her way to the door.

275
00:17:15,870 --> 00:17:17,349
She hears it again.

276
00:17:17,350 --> 00:17:19,829
"Thump-thump.
Thump-thump."

277
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:22,180
So this girl is standing by the door

278
00:17:22,181 --> 00:17:26,662
and the "thump-thump"
is getting louder and louder.

279
00:17:26,663 --> 00:17:29,100
<i>So she opens the door and screams.</i>

280
00:17:29,101 --> 00:17:31,319
<i>But she won't come out.</i>

281
00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:34,105
<i>She looks out, terrified as her
roommate comes up the stairs.</i>

282
00:17:34,106 --> 00:17:36,716
Only the axe man cut off all her arms and legs.

283
00:17:36,717 --> 00:17:39,284
She's dragging herself up by her chin.

284
00:17:39,285 --> 00:17:42,243
<i>Thump-thump. Thump-thump. Thump-thump.</i>

285
00:17:42,244 --> 00:17:45,159
Phenomenally incredible, huh?

286
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:47,857
It really happened?

287
00:17:47,858 --> 00:17:49,772
I'm deadly serious, man.

288
00:17:49,773 --> 00:17:52,035
My brother Freddie told me
it happened to a friend

289
00:17:52,036 --> 00:17:54,864
of a friend of a distant cousin
of a cousin of ours.

290
00:18:32,555 --> 00:18:33,991
Darn.

291
00:18:50,660 --> 00:18:54,881
<i>Please, oh, please, no!</i>

292
00:18:54,882 --> 00:18:59,102
<i>Someone please help!</i>

293
00:18:59,103 --> 00:19:02,889
<i>Please!
Help me, please!</i>

294
00:19:02,890 --> 00:19:05,152
<i>Go away!
Go away!</i>

295
00:19:29,177 --> 00:19:30,612
Hey, Brian.

296
00:19:30,613 --> 00:19:32,310
Hey, Brian, you okay?

297
00:19:32,311 --> 00:19:35,748
Looks like you got two
weird phenomenons in your house--

298
00:19:35,749 --> 00:19:38,533
a monster and a giant chicken.

299
00:19:38,534 --> 00:19:40,579
Double or nothing.

300
00:20:03,298 --> 00:20:05,386
Can I be excused?

301
00:20:05,387 --> 00:20:07,171
Yes.

302
00:20:28,889 --> 00:20:31,413
Eric wanted you to have this.

303
00:20:33,285 --> 00:20:35,808
Hi, Mom.

304
00:20:35,809 --> 00:20:37,506
Hi.

305
00:20:38,942 --> 00:20:41,422
Brian, are you all right?

306
00:20:41,423 --> 00:20:44,077
Fine, Mom.
Never felt better.

307
00:20:44,078 --> 00:20:48,516
Oh, well, then what are you
doing in bed at 9:15 at night?

308
00:20:48,517 --> 00:20:50,039
School, Mom.

309
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:51,563
It's a big day ahead of me.

310
00:20:51,564 --> 00:20:53,434
Big, big, day.

311
00:20:53,435 --> 00:20:55,523
Sounds nice, Brian.

312
00:20:55,524 --> 00:20:57,177
Why don't I believe you?

313
00:20:57,178 --> 00:20:59,962
It's the new me.

314
00:20:59,963 --> 00:21:01,877
Okay.

315
00:21:01,878 --> 00:21:05,795
Well, I guess I'll see the brand-new,
all-new you in the morning.

316
00:21:10,409 --> 00:21:11,758
Mom?

317
00:21:15,065 --> 00:21:16,502
I love you.

318
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,548
I love you, too, honey.

319
00:21:20,549 --> 00:21:22,377
- Good night.
- <i>Good night.</i>

320
00:23:31,767 --> 00:23:33,464
Yeah!

321
00:23:58,446 --> 00:23:59,446
Ah!

322
00:24:05,627 --> 00:24:08,499
Dad, a mons...

323
00:24:08,500 --> 00:24:10,589
ter.

324
00:24:14,201 --> 00:24:16,245
What are you doing, Brian?

325
00:24:16,246 --> 00:24:18,378
What the hell is going--
look at this mess.

326
00:24:18,379 --> 00:24:21,120
What the hell am I stepping in?
Doritos? Jesus.

327
00:24:21,121 --> 00:24:22,991
- I'll clean 'em up.
- You're damn right you will.

328
00:24:22,992 --> 00:24:24,471
Get back in that bed, mister.

329
00:24:24,472 --> 00:24:27,953
Dad, wait a minute.
There was a monster here.

330
00:24:27,954 --> 00:24:29,607
You gotta believe me.

331
00:24:29,608 --> 00:24:31,217
A monster.
Brian, it's a pile of clothes.

332
00:24:31,218 --> 00:24:33,349
You're wrestling a pile of clothes.

333
00:24:33,350 --> 00:24:34,916
What's so funny?

334
00:24:34,917 --> 00:24:36,570
After you finish cleaning this room tomorrow,

335
00:24:36,571 --> 00:24:37,931
you're gonna clean out the garage.

336
00:24:40,183 --> 00:24:42,402
And after the garage,
you're gonna cut the hedges.

337
00:24:42,403 --> 00:24:43,969
But it wasn't my fault.

338
00:24:43,970 --> 00:24:45,927
After the hedges,
you're gonna mow the lawn.

339
00:24:45,928 --> 00:24:47,800
- <i>It wasn't my fault.
- Good night.</i>

340
00:26:19,631 --> 00:26:21,588
Boo.

341
00:26:21,589 --> 00:26:24,636
Keep an eye out for monsters!

342
00:26:26,246 --> 00:26:27,986
Uh-uh.

343
00:26:27,987 --> 00:26:30,249
- I'll scream.
- Scream? Good idea.

344
00:26:30,250 --> 00:26:32,164
You scream, your dad's gonna come in here

345
00:26:32,165 --> 00:26:34,514
with a 12-gauge shotgun--
pow-- blow your head off.

346
00:26:34,515 --> 00:26:36,951
Actually, I'll scream.

347
00:26:36,952 --> 00:26:40,476
Shut up!

348
00:26:40,477 --> 00:26:42,870
Great.

349
00:26:42,871 --> 00:26:44,350
Actually, your dad's gonna come in here

350
00:26:44,351 --> 00:26:46,004
and find Dorito puke all over the floor.

351
00:26:46,005 --> 00:26:48,920
What's he gonna say, huh?
Wow, baseball cards!

352
00:26:48,921 --> 00:26:51,662
I love baseball cards.
Got 'em, got 'em, need 'em,

353
00:26:51,663 --> 00:26:53,359
got' em, got' em,
got' em, need 'em,

354
00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:55,404
got' em, need 'em,
need 'em, got' em,

355
00:26:55,405 --> 00:26:57,755
need 'em, need 'em,
got' em, got' em, need 'em.

356
00:26:57,756 --> 00:26:59,670
Oh, football.

357
00:26:59,671 --> 00:27:01,628
He goes to the 25 yard line,

358
00:27:01,629 --> 00:27:04,196
the 50 yard line,
the 40 yard line.

359
00:27:04,197 --> 00:27:06,067
Stevenson, go for the long bomb.

360
00:27:06,068 --> 00:27:07,939
Whoa.

361
00:27:07,940 --> 00:27:10,637
Light! The sun!
The sun! The sun!

362
00:27:10,638 --> 00:27:14,207
Let me go, let me go,
let me go, let me go!

363
00:27:20,082 --> 00:27:22,214
Ow.

364
00:27:22,215 --> 00:27:24,433
Ooh, oh, ow.

365
00:27:24,434 --> 00:27:26,827
Ooh, whoa, ow.

366
00:27:26,828 --> 00:27:29,134
Ow, ow, ow, ow,

367
00:27:29,135 --> 00:27:32,572
ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

368
00:27:32,573 --> 00:27:36,271
Ow. Ah.

369
00:27:36,272 --> 00:27:38,665
Okay.
Horns.

370
00:27:38,666 --> 00:27:40,449
Great!

371
00:27:40,450 --> 00:27:43,018
Great, now nobody's gonna recognize me.

372
00:27:44,890 --> 00:27:46,499
I gotta get under the bed.

373
00:27:46,500 --> 00:27:48,719
- I gotta go under--
- <i>No!</i>

374
00:27:50,765 --> 00:27:52,331
What's happening?

375
00:27:52,332 --> 00:27:54,246
I gotta get back.
I gotta go.

376
00:27:54,247 --> 00:27:56,683
I gotta go.
I gotta-- oh.

377
00:27:56,684 --> 00:27:58,903
What's going on?

378
00:27:58,904 --> 00:28:01,296
Bacon and eggs, kid.
What do you want,

379
00:28:01,297 --> 00:28:04,170
sunny side up or over easy, huh?

380
00:28:05,301 --> 00:28:06,867
You're dying.

381
00:28:13,396 --> 00:28:14,789
It's the sunlight, isn't it?

382
00:28:18,967 --> 00:28:21,403
First it disfigures you,
then it kills you.

383
00:28:21,404 --> 00:28:25,669
Nah, you're mixing me up
with that pansy with the red cape.

384
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:30,282
<i>Please. Ow.</i>

385
00:28:30,283 --> 00:28:32,501
I have to--

386
00:28:32,502 --> 00:28:36,070
I have to get under the bed before--

387
00:28:36,071 --> 00:28:39,595
before the sun totally rises.

388
00:28:39,596 --> 00:28:43,164
Uh-uh, no way.
You wrecked my bike.

389
00:28:43,165 --> 00:28:45,732
You've been pulling stuff,
trying to get me in trouble.

390
00:28:45,733 --> 00:28:49,997
Brian. Bri-- please.

391
00:29:12,194 --> 00:29:13,935
Damn.

392
00:29:47,403 --> 00:29:49,535
Hey, bud.

393
00:29:49,536 --> 00:29:52,147
The name's Maurice and I'll catch ya later.

394
00:29:56,935 --> 00:30:00,546
<i>He finds Ainge.
DJ, straight away 20.</i>

395
00:30:00,547 --> 00:30:03,244
<i>No. Rebound New York.</i>

396
00:30:03,245 --> 00:30:05,203
<i>Michael Jack--
Mark Jackson.</i>

397
00:30:06,901 --> 00:30:09,033
<i>Fastball inside to Schmidt--</i>

398
00:30:09,034 --> 00:30:10,948
<i>Back in a hurry. Oh, nice.</i>

399
00:30:10,949 --> 00:30:13,211
This is ridiculous!
I want my remote.

400
00:30:13,212 --> 00:30:15,082
Where the hell is it?

401
00:30:15,083 --> 00:30:17,998
<i>How am I supposed to watch TV
without the remote, huh?</i>

402
00:30:17,999 --> 00:30:20,871
Have you, by any chance,
seen a piece of sandpaper

403
00:30:20,872 --> 00:30:23,264
<i>or a paintbrush around here
the last few days?</i>

404
00:30:23,265 --> 00:30:25,049
- Huh?
<i>- Now Reggie.</i>

405
00:30:25,050 --> 00:30:27,616
<i>Straight away foul line.
No.</i>

406
00:30:31,056 --> 00:30:33,274
Well, yeah, sure, there was one.

407
00:30:33,275 --> 00:30:35,015
But there are no more, right?

408
00:30:35,016 --> 00:30:38,584
Right.
Your room is monster-free.

409
00:30:38,585 --> 00:30:42,631
So I'll be taking my master suite back tonight.

410
00:30:42,632 --> 00:30:45,678
<i>- 16 to go.
- He's tired. DJ is tired.</i>

411
00:30:45,679 --> 00:30:48,595
Brian! Eric!

412
00:30:51,380 --> 00:30:53,120
Hey, Bri, Eric?

413
00:30:53,121 --> 00:30:54,905
Have you guys seen the remote thing?

414
00:30:54,906 --> 00:30:58,212
I've got the Celtics, the Sox,
and the Masters are on.

415
00:30:58,213 --> 00:31:01,128
I can't switch without the--
you know, the remote.

416
00:31:01,129 --> 00:31:03,957
I didn't take it, Dad!

417
00:31:03,958 --> 00:31:05,741
Well, then, where--

418
00:31:05,742 --> 00:31:08,180
God damn this house.

419
00:31:28,026 --> 00:31:31,029
<i>Mom, a monster!</i>

420
00:31:35,033 --> 00:31:38,296
Hey, why'd you change rooms
with that whiffle ball, huh?

421
00:31:38,297 --> 00:31:40,167
You know, he's gonna have a heart attack

422
00:31:40,168 --> 00:31:42,169
by the time he's 10.

423
00:31:42,170 --> 00:31:44,302
Ow.

424
00:31:44,303 --> 00:31:47,174
- Ow...
- I get it!

425
00:31:47,175 --> 00:31:48,784
All right, so, like,

426
00:31:48,785 --> 00:31:51,004
when it gets darker,
your eyeballs get bigger.

427
00:31:51,005 --> 00:31:53,572
But then when the lights go on,
you turn into clothes.

428
00:31:53,573 --> 00:31:56,836
Oh, brilliant, Bri.
Just brilliant.

429
00:31:56,837 --> 00:31:58,969
You must be in, what?
At least grade two.

430
00:31:58,970 --> 00:32:01,928
- Six.
- A worldly scholar.

431
00:32:01,929 --> 00:32:04,191
Super. I love it.
Now how about lighting a candle?

432
00:32:04,192 --> 00:32:06,019
These lights are painful, man.

433
00:32:06,020 --> 00:32:07,934
No way.
I have enough problems

434
00:32:07,935 --> 00:32:10,023
without you running around
getting me into more.

435
00:32:10,024 --> 00:32:11,938
You got your stupid remote control back.

436
00:32:11,939 --> 00:32:13,332
Now turn off the lights.

437
00:32:16,988 --> 00:32:19,032
Hey, what about the batteries?

438
00:32:19,033 --> 00:32:21,339
I ate 'em for breakfast.
I'd give 'em to you right now,

439
00:32:21,340 --> 00:32:23,906
but AA batteries constipate me, okay?

440
00:32:23,907 --> 00:32:26,474
- Maybe a little later?
- That's gross.

441
00:32:26,475 --> 00:32:27,823
Hey, and what about my bike?

442
00:32:27,824 --> 00:32:29,434
I'll get you a new bike.

443
00:32:29,435 --> 00:32:32,654
Just get me out of these clothes!

444
00:32:32,655 --> 00:32:34,178
Shh!

445
00:32:34,179 --> 00:32:38,008
Honest, I'm burning up.
My inseams are on fire!

446
00:32:38,009 --> 00:32:41,794
All right, but any funny moves
and you're clothes.

447
00:32:54,808 --> 00:32:56,896
Grazie, boy. Grazie.

448
00:32:56,897 --> 00:32:58,550
Oh, you're a pretty sharp kid.

449
00:32:58,551 --> 00:33:00,508
You're-- oh, you're ugly,
but you're sharp.

450
00:33:02,424 --> 00:33:05,470
Wait, wait, wait.
Let me get it. Let me get it.

451
00:33:07,516 --> 00:33:09,909
You know, I thought it was
something good, but it's snot.

452
00:33:09,910 --> 00:33:13,956
I've been in this business now,
what, well over 200 years,

453
00:33:13,957 --> 00:33:16,003
and I've never been trapped once.

454
00:33:17,787 --> 00:33:20,267
<i>- How old are you?
- 11.</i>

455
00:33:20,268 --> 00:33:22,748
Wow, and I ain't gettin' any prettier.

456
00:33:22,749 --> 00:33:25,707
Hey, dude.
Come here, bud.

457
00:33:25,708 --> 00:33:29,276
You don't know it yet,
but tonight it is your lucky night.

458
00:33:29,277 --> 00:33:31,322
- What do you mean?
- I mean--

459
00:33:31,323 --> 00:33:34,238
Oh, oh, I know.
You're gonna grant me 3 wishes, right?

460
00:33:34,239 --> 00:33:36,370
Wishes?

461
00:33:36,371 --> 00:33:41,201
Wishes?
Wishes are bush-league leprechaun, pal.

462
00:33:41,202 --> 00:33:43,812
I'm a monster, okay?
Okay, listen to this.

463
00:33:43,813 --> 00:33:47,381
I'm a monster,
and monsters don't do wishes.

464
00:33:47,382 --> 00:33:50,732
- Then what do monsters do?
- Good question.

465
00:33:50,733 --> 00:33:55,825
I have the time of my life.

466
00:34:02,267 --> 00:34:04,920
- Tada!
- How do you do that?

467
00:34:04,921 --> 00:34:06,661
<i>It's magic, chump.
It is.</i>

468
00:34:06,662 --> 00:34:09,142
You just gotta be handsome
and gorgeous like me

469
00:34:09,143 --> 00:34:13,320
or have somebody handsome
and gorgeous like me show you how.

470
00:34:13,321 --> 00:34:15,844
Brian Stevenson, come on down.

471
00:34:15,845 --> 00:34:18,064
I can't.

472
00:34:18,065 --> 00:34:20,545
"Can't."
Ooh, I hate that word.

473
00:34:20,546 --> 00:34:22,938
Ooh, ooh, that word's like caca to me.

474
00:34:22,939 --> 00:34:26,072
No, can't, can't.
You can't jam a basketball.

475
00:34:26,073 --> 00:34:28,857
You can't have a hand grenade
go off in your lap and survive.

476
00:34:28,858 --> 00:34:30,337
Those things you can't do.

477
00:34:30,338 --> 00:34:35,081
But you can take a walk on the wild side.

478
00:34:35,082 --> 00:34:37,605
Well, I mean, look.
I mean, even if I do go,

479
00:34:37,606 --> 00:34:39,477
how do I know I'm gonna be able to come back?

480
00:34:39,478 --> 00:34:42,132
Listen to me.
What goes on down there

481
00:34:42,133 --> 00:34:44,831
is every kid's fantasy.

482
00:34:46,746 --> 00:34:48,355
Imagine, if you will...

483
00:34:48,356 --> 00:34:50,879
imagine a world solely of kids,

484
00:34:50,880 --> 00:34:53,665
kids that just wanna have fun.

485
00:34:53,666 --> 00:34:55,362
And make trouble.

486
00:34:55,363 --> 00:34:56,755
Trouble?

487
00:34:56,756 --> 00:34:59,279
Trouble is our code of honor.

488
00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:02,891
It's our blood,
our life support system.

489
00:35:02,892 --> 00:35:05,459
It's our <i>raison d'être.</i>

490
00:35:05,460 --> 00:35:08,201
- That's French.
- Do they all look like you?

491
00:35:08,202 --> 00:35:11,813
Only the good-looking ones.

492
00:35:11,814 --> 00:35:15,730
Think of it, Bri.
No teachers, no rules, no homework.

493
00:35:15,731 --> 00:35:17,776
No parents.
You hear me, boy?

494
00:35:17,777 --> 00:35:20,082
- I said-- I said no parents.
- No parents.

495
00:35:20,083 --> 00:35:22,215
Man, that alone is worth
all the money in the world.

496
00:35:22,216 --> 00:35:23,695
It's about leaving your clothes

497
00:35:23,696 --> 00:35:25,305
wherever it is you wanna leave 'em.

498
00:35:25,306 --> 00:35:27,481
It's about never having
to clean up after you eat.

499
00:35:27,482 --> 00:35:30,180
It's about never worrying
about being on time. Whoa!

500
00:35:30,181 --> 00:35:34,053
It's about staying up late, watching
whatever it is you wanna watch on TV.

501
00:35:34,054 --> 00:35:35,315
You wanna watch "Letterman"?

502
00:35:35,316 --> 00:35:36,756
You wanna watch the Playboy Channel?

503
00:35:38,276 --> 00:35:40,102
It's about nailing somebody that bugs you

504
00:35:40,103 --> 00:35:41,800
in a way that you never dreamed possible.

505
00:35:41,801 --> 00:35:43,584
What's that?

506
00:35:43,585 --> 00:35:46,152
It's about total,
100%, unadulterated,

507
00:35:46,153 --> 00:35:48,286
where's-the-beef anarchy!

508
00:35:49,635 --> 00:35:54,247
Brian, it's about freedom.

509
00:35:54,248 --> 00:35:58,033
Freedom to live life

510
00:35:58,034 --> 00:36:03,169
the way the creators
of this planet intended it.

511
00:36:03,170 --> 00:36:06,128
Man, that sounds great.

512
00:36:06,129 --> 00:36:08,174
What do you say, bud?
You ready?

513
00:36:08,175 --> 00:36:11,091
Maurice, I was born ready.

514
00:36:12,919 --> 00:36:15,355
But first I'm gonna need some insurance.

515
00:36:15,356 --> 00:36:19,707
Whoa, there, thunder.
No, no, no candles, matches.

516
00:36:19,708 --> 00:36:22,841
Even something festive like this--
this would be nice.

517
00:36:22,842 --> 00:36:25,278
But absolutely <i>nada--
no bright light.</i>

518
00:36:25,279 --> 00:36:28,020
Okay, bud?
Oh, all right, all right, all right.

519
00:36:28,021 --> 00:36:30,152
If you wanna take it,
I'm tellin' ya, we gotta hide it.

520
00:36:30,153 --> 00:36:31,632
- Okay, sure.
- Okay? Sure.

521
00:36:31,633 --> 00:36:33,679
Come on.

522
00:36:35,594 --> 00:36:37,682
Maurice!

523
00:36:39,728 --> 00:36:41,252
Whoosh.

524
00:36:49,085 --> 00:36:51,086
Hey, bud.

525
00:36:51,087 --> 00:36:54,307
- Come on.
- Whoa. What is this place?

526
00:36:54,308 --> 00:36:57,441
<i>I mean, I thought the dining room
was under Eric's room.</i>

527
00:36:57,442 --> 00:37:00,182
<i>Well, we're not
in Kansas anymore, bud.</i>

528
00:37:00,183 --> 00:37:02,664
Come on, take a look at this.

529
00:37:05,363 --> 00:37:08,887
Take a gander, Bri.
Ain't it amazin'?

530
00:37:11,717 --> 00:37:13,501
Wow.

531
00:37:20,813 --> 00:37:23,336
Yo, Brian, move 'em out.

532
00:37:23,337 --> 00:37:25,077
We're burning nightlight, pard'.

533
00:37:25,078 --> 00:37:28,036
Come on, come on, come on.

534
00:37:28,037 --> 00:37:31,344
- Oh.
- Hey, Maurice. Like the horns.

535
00:37:31,345 --> 00:37:33,259
Syd!

536
00:37:33,260 --> 00:37:35,522
I never forget a face.

537
00:37:35,523 --> 00:37:38,177
It's the other one I can't remember.
Get outta here, bud.

538
00:37:38,178 --> 00:37:39,831
Come on, Brian.

539
00:37:39,832 --> 00:37:42,616
- Did not. Did not. Did not.
- Did, too. Did, too. Did, too.

540
00:37:42,617 --> 00:37:45,576
Hey, Owl, Rigsbut,
this is my new bud.

541
00:37:45,577 --> 00:37:47,795
- Hi, bud.
- Hi, the name's Brian.

542
00:37:47,796 --> 00:37:49,188
- Hi, Brian.
- Bud.

543
00:37:49,189 --> 00:37:50,972
- Brian. Brian. Brian.
- Bud. Bud. Bud.

544
00:37:52,366 --> 00:37:54,019
Wait a second.

545
00:37:54,020 --> 00:37:56,369
<i>What are all these stairs
and ladders for?</i>

546
00:37:56,370 --> 00:37:58,240
<i>Good question, bud.</i>

547
00:37:58,241 --> 00:37:59,851
Every one of these staircases

548
00:37:59,852 --> 00:38:01,766
leads to some poor soul's bedroom.

549
00:38:01,767 --> 00:38:04,203
It's like--
let me put this simply.

550
00:38:04,204 --> 00:38:07,946
It's a veritable cornucopia of mischief.

551
00:38:07,947 --> 00:38:10,775
- Hi, Maurice.
- Hey, come here. Come here.

552
00:38:10,776 --> 00:38:12,994
- What's that on your shirt?
- Where? Aw.

553
00:38:12,995 --> 00:38:15,476
Get outta here.
Let me show you around.

554
00:38:17,260 --> 00:38:19,261
Let me show you straight.

555
00:38:19,262 --> 00:38:20,915
Don't do it.
"I have to do it!"

556
00:38:20,916 --> 00:38:23,570
Don't do it. "Nobody likes me!
Good-bye cruel world!"

557
00:38:26,139 --> 00:38:29,054
Gomer, Brian.
Brian, Gomer.

558
00:38:29,055 --> 00:38:33,363
Any friend of Maurice is a friend of mine.

559
00:38:33,364 --> 00:38:35,627
Eh.

560
00:38:37,542 --> 00:38:39,194
- You're gonna love this place.
- What?

561
00:38:39,195 --> 00:38:41,109
All right, the magic word.

562
00:38:41,110 --> 00:38:42,894
Oh, I forget the magic word.

563
00:38:42,895 --> 00:38:44,455
- It's, uh-- it's, uh...
- Think, think!

564
00:38:46,072 --> 00:38:49,901
<i>That's it! Come on, bud!</i>

565
00:38:49,902 --> 00:38:53,339
- Shoot, shoot, shoot!
- How you doing? Strike!

566
00:38:53,340 --> 00:38:56,081
Oh, rock 'n' roll!

567
00:38:56,082 --> 00:38:58,692
- Dance with me, babe.
- Sure.

568
00:38:58,693 --> 00:39:00,955
One, two, cha-cha-cha.

569
00:39:00,956 --> 00:39:04,003
One, two.

570
00:39:13,316 --> 00:39:15,579
- Yeah.
- That's neat, Bri.

571
00:39:15,580 --> 00:39:18,799
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Free ball, free ball!

572
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:21,236
Hey. Hey,
what are you doing?

573
00:39:21,237 --> 00:39:24,196
- You're gonna tilt it!
- I know the place-- ow!

574
00:39:25,851 --> 00:39:27,678
Kiddo, baby, honey, bubby.

575
00:39:27,679 --> 00:39:29,897
Open your eyes.
Don't ya know?

576
00:39:29,898 --> 00:39:33,206
Down here there's no such thing as tilt.

577
00:39:36,078 --> 00:39:37,862
<i>Go. Win it, boss.
Win it!</i>

578
00:39:37,863 --> 00:39:39,995
<i>Come on, Maurice, go!</i>

579
00:39:42,955 --> 00:39:45,739
This is my favorite place on the whole planet.

580
00:39:45,740 --> 00:39:48,699
Every craving you've ever craved.

581
00:39:48,700 --> 00:39:51,571
Every flavor you've ever flaved.

582
00:39:51,572 --> 00:39:55,096
And the best part
is you don't see any parents

583
00:39:55,097 --> 00:39:57,272
telling the kids what they can't eat, do ya?

584
00:39:57,273 --> 00:39:58,535
No.

585
00:39:58,536 --> 00:40:00,232
- Do ya?
- No!

586
00:40:00,233 --> 00:40:02,843
<i>Must get beef!</i>

587
00:40:02,844 --> 00:40:05,367
Oh.

588
00:40:05,368 --> 00:40:07,544
'Za, I love 'za.

589
00:40:07,545 --> 00:40:09,937
Cake.

590
00:40:09,938 --> 00:40:11,504
For later.

591
00:40:11,505 --> 00:40:13,419
Laces tied together.

592
00:40:13,420 --> 00:40:14,812
Hey, somebody wants you over there.

593
00:40:14,813 --> 00:40:15,987
- What?
- Right there, yeah.

594
00:40:15,988 --> 00:40:17,771
Whoa!

595
00:40:17,772 --> 00:40:19,904
- Hey, you hurt me.
- Hey, don't fight.

596
00:40:19,905 --> 00:40:21,558
- Did not.
- Did, too.

597
00:40:21,559 --> 00:40:23,473
Oh, look, somebody dropped a quarter.

598
00:40:23,474 --> 00:40:25,692
- Whose is it? Don't know.
- Don't know.

599
00:40:25,693 --> 00:40:27,346
- Hey, let me give you a hand with that.
- Oh, yeah, me, too.

600
00:40:27,347 --> 00:40:29,435
- Oh.
- Oh, uh-oh.

601
00:40:29,436 --> 00:40:31,742
- Hey, Maurice.
- <i>Hey, Schmoog.</i>

602
00:40:31,743 --> 00:40:34,527
- Who's the drip?
- Hey, ease off, bud.

603
00:40:34,528 --> 00:40:37,487
This young man, he saved me
from a fatal case of sunburn,

604
00:40:37,488 --> 00:40:40,228
so I decided to give him the grand tour.

605
00:40:40,229 --> 00:40:43,014
<i>Oh, well...</i>

606
00:40:43,015 --> 00:40:45,364
- you got a brat in Cleveland.
- A brat in Cleveland.

607
00:40:45,365 --> 00:40:47,714
- An imp in Atlanta.
- An imp in Atlanta.

608
00:40:47,715 --> 00:40:52,066
- And a twerp in Boston.
- And a twerp in-- and a dweeb giving me all this.

609
00:40:52,067 --> 00:40:54,242
Raise hell tonight.

610
00:40:54,243 --> 00:40:57,376
And show him how it's done.

611
00:40:57,377 --> 00:40:59,987
<i>I will.</i>

612
00:40:59,988 --> 00:41:02,163
- Biting--
- Wait a second.

613
00:41:02,164 --> 00:41:04,688
You're not gonna tell me there's
an airport in this place, are you?

614
00:41:04,689 --> 00:41:07,517
Brian, come on.

615
00:41:07,518 --> 00:41:09,562
Does it look like these
hunchbacks can handle a plane?

616
00:41:09,563 --> 00:41:12,652
It's magic.

617
00:41:12,653 --> 00:41:14,175
- That was pretty neat, huh?
- Yeah.

618
00:41:14,176 --> 00:41:16,830
See, down heredistance is like time.

619
00:41:16,831 --> 00:41:19,790
- Yeah?
- And time is like...

620
00:41:19,791 --> 00:41:22,445
it's like polyester with an Acrylon blend.

621
00:41:26,101 --> 00:41:28,887
<i>Whoa, where are you, bud?</i>

622
00:41:30,889 --> 00:41:32,367
Wait a second.

623
00:41:32,368 --> 00:41:34,413
This is somebody else's house.

624
00:41:34,414 --> 00:41:36,546
No. Duh.

625
00:41:36,547 --> 00:41:38,591
Where'd you park the squad car, Dick Tracy?

626
00:41:38,592 --> 00:41:41,768
- Come on.
- Hey, hey, look.

627
00:41:41,769 --> 00:41:46,077
Hey, chill out, babe, okay?
I mean, you're quick.

628
00:41:46,078 --> 00:41:48,775
That's good instinct,
but it's a little...

629
00:41:48,776 --> 00:41:51,170
primitive, huh?

630
00:41:54,608 --> 00:41:57,089
Whoa, not now, Harold.

631
00:42:01,963 --> 00:42:03,747
Isn't he sweet?

632
00:42:03,748 --> 00:42:06,445
I bet you he's dreaming about puppies

633
00:42:06,446 --> 00:42:09,361
and his favorite baseball player.

634
00:42:09,362 --> 00:42:11,363
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

635
00:42:11,364 --> 00:42:14,105
Well, not for long.

636
00:42:29,469 --> 00:42:31,383
- Yellow.
- Yellow.

637
00:42:31,384 --> 00:42:33,777
Yellow.

638
00:42:33,778 --> 00:42:36,214
- Blue, blue.
- Blue, blue.

639
00:42:38,130 --> 00:42:40,392
Ah...

640
00:43:14,993 --> 00:43:17,647
Chocolata.

641
00:43:17,648 --> 00:43:19,779
- All right.
- Never above 3'6".

642
00:43:19,780 --> 00:43:22,521
3'6"?
Ooh.

643
00:43:22,522 --> 00:43:25,786
- Always against white. Looks good against white.
- Yeah.

644
00:43:28,833 --> 00:43:31,182
You know, Bri,
we live in a world

645
00:43:31,183 --> 00:43:35,099
dedicated to wreaking hell
on an entire nation of kids.

646
00:43:35,100 --> 00:43:38,276
- Kids, hey, they're not that bad.
- Mm-hmm.

647
00:43:38,277 --> 00:43:40,931
We're the reason kids
get locked in their rooms.

648
00:43:40,932 --> 00:43:44,021
We're the reason brothers
hate their sisters.

649
00:43:44,022 --> 00:43:48,634
We're also the reason that
parents send their kids back to camp.

650
00:43:48,635 --> 00:43:50,810
I love it!

651
00:43:50,811 --> 00:43:52,856
I'm alive!

652
00:43:52,857 --> 00:43:55,989
Maurice, Maurice, is there any
way I can make, like, a special stop?

653
00:43:55,990 --> 00:43:57,599
I wanna check somebody out.

654
00:43:57,600 --> 00:43:59,950
Oh, you're too good.

655
00:43:59,951 --> 00:44:02,257
You're just too damn good!

656
00:44:06,348 --> 00:44:09,134
- <i>♪ Wanna yell...
- Whoa, something stinks.</i>

657
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:13,267
Look at Ronnie Coleman

658
00:44:13,268 --> 00:44:16,749
with his little teddy bear and thumb.

659
00:44:16,750 --> 00:44:18,708
This is classic.

660
00:44:18,709 --> 00:44:20,579
- What's this? What's this?
- Oh, oh.

661
00:44:20,580 --> 00:44:22,581
- Ronnie's sandwich.
- Ronnie's sandwich.

662
00:44:22,582 --> 00:44:24,626
Yeah.
All right.

663
00:44:24,627 --> 00:44:25,889
- What flavor-- what is it?
- What is it?

664
00:44:25,890 --> 00:44:27,847
Tuna fish.

665
00:44:27,848 --> 00:44:29,980
- Ooh, it stinks.
- Yes.

666
00:44:29,981 --> 00:44:31,243
Cat food.

667
00:44:40,687 --> 00:44:43,036
- Perfect.
- And then-- hoo-hoo.

668
00:44:43,037 --> 00:44:48,128
- Wrap it nicely.
- And then you bake it in the oven 350 degrees.

669
00:44:48,129 --> 00:44:51,044
- Okay. Okay, ready?
- All right, yeah.

670
00:44:51,045 --> 00:44:52,742
- Turn it face up.
- All right.

671
00:44:52,743 --> 00:44:55,440
They'll never notice.

672
00:44:55,441 --> 00:44:57,442
What, what, what?

673
00:44:57,443 --> 00:44:59,139
- Apple juice? So what?
- Hold it.

674
00:44:59,140 --> 00:45:01,794
Yeah, what?

675
00:45:01,795 --> 00:45:03,317
You're drinking it?

676
00:45:03,318 --> 00:45:06,538
Maurice, that's disgusting.

677
00:45:07,888 --> 00:45:09,497
What is that all about?

678
00:45:14,590 --> 00:45:16,069
And good for you, too.

679
00:45:16,070 --> 00:45:18,158
What are you doing?

680
00:45:18,159 --> 00:45:21,249
All right, Maurice! That's great!

681
00:45:22,424 --> 00:45:25,339
All right, yes.
Oh, yes.

682
00:45:25,340 --> 00:45:28,778
Oh, yes.

683
00:45:28,779 --> 00:45:31,519
Oh, boy, what'd you eat today, man.

684
00:45:31,520 --> 00:45:33,391
Ronnie's gonna be pissed.

685
00:45:33,392 --> 00:45:36,307
No kidding.

686
00:45:42,444 --> 00:45:44,837
Hiy-- ow.

687
00:45:44,838 --> 00:45:46,360
Yow!

688
00:45:46,361 --> 00:45:50,495
I feel like I have been on vacation for a week.

689
00:45:50,496 --> 00:45:52,540
Cool, bud.

690
00:45:52,541 --> 00:45:54,891
No.

691
00:45:54,892 --> 00:45:56,980
My dad's getting up in 10 minutes.

692
00:45:56,981 --> 00:46:00,985
Whoa, that means the sun comes up in five.

693
00:46:03,596 --> 00:46:05,292
Okay, bud.

694
00:46:05,293 --> 00:46:07,251
I can't bear to see anybody

695
00:46:07,252 --> 00:46:11,038
go up there without protection.

696
00:46:12,387 --> 00:46:14,127
Those UVs can be pretty dangerous,

697
00:46:14,128 --> 00:46:16,216
if you know what I mean.

698
00:46:16,217 --> 00:46:17,914
- Thanks.
- Yeah.

699
00:46:17,915 --> 00:46:19,524
Visiting hours are over at dawn,

700
00:46:19,525 --> 00:46:22,396
so unless you want a new
residence or a set of horns,

701
00:46:22,397 --> 00:46:24,703
we'd better book, bud, okay?

702
00:46:24,704 --> 00:46:27,706
I suppose you're going to tell me

703
00:46:27,707 --> 00:46:29,447
your sister did this.

704
00:46:29,448 --> 00:46:31,318
Uh-huh.

705
00:46:31,319 --> 00:46:33,277
I'm innocent!
I'm innocent!

706
00:46:33,278 --> 00:46:35,148
I'll take a lie-detector test!

707
00:46:35,149 --> 00:46:37,890
<i>If you didn't do it, who did?!</i>

708
00:46:37,891 --> 00:46:39,500
I don't know!

709
00:46:39,501 --> 00:46:41,981
<i>Peter!</i>

710
00:46:41,982 --> 00:46:44,157
<i>It's because
I'm working, isn't it?</i>

711
00:46:44,158 --> 00:46:47,247
<i>Son, doll hair
never grows back.</i>

712
00:46:47,248 --> 00:46:50,990
<i>What made you think
the cat needed a shave?</i>

713
00:46:50,991 --> 00:46:53,471
<i>Do you want to go
to military school?</i>

714
00:46:53,472 --> 00:46:57,605
<i>Good morning, Mr. Stevenson!</i>

715
00:47:12,186 --> 00:47:15,101
Move it.

716
00:47:22,414 --> 00:47:24,850
Hey, what's with the glasses,
Rip Van Winkle?

717
00:47:24,851 --> 00:47:26,939
I had a late night.

718
00:47:26,940 --> 00:47:29,855
I bet you were up real late working on
<i>your</i> science project.

719
00:47:29,856 --> 00:47:32,336
Actually, I never thought of it that way.

720
00:47:32,337 --> 00:47:34,425
<i>Well, mine's all finished.</i>

721
00:47:34,426 --> 00:47:36,557
Great.

722
00:47:36,558 --> 00:47:37,908
Mmm.

723
00:47:52,357 --> 00:47:54,706
Piss!

724
00:47:54,707 --> 00:47:57,796
Who put piss in my apple juice?

725
00:47:57,797 --> 00:47:59,102
- Yes!
- Gross!

726
00:47:59,103 --> 00:48:01,800
Yes! Yes!
All right!

727
00:48:01,801 --> 00:48:05,326
<i>Ew, he spit piss on the principal!</i>

728
00:48:42,537 --> 00:48:47,498
<i>Maurice!</i>

729
00:48:47,499 --> 00:48:50,196
A natural.

730
00:48:50,197 --> 00:48:51,806
No-holds-barred,
dyed-in-the-wool,

731
00:48:51,807 --> 00:48:53,591
no-assembly-required natural.

732
00:48:53,592 --> 00:48:55,419
Wah!

733
00:48:55,420 --> 00:48:56,768
What?

734
00:48:56,769 --> 00:48:58,291
"What"?
What do you think?

735
00:48:58,292 --> 00:48:59,640
Geez, I thought I was quick,

736
00:48:59,641 --> 00:49:01,468
but you, you, you, Scooby Doo,

737
00:49:01,469 --> 00:49:04,254
you're already moving through the shadows.

738
00:49:04,255 --> 00:49:06,038
- No, I'm not.
- No, you're not?

739
00:49:06,039 --> 00:49:07,300
- No.
- No.

740
00:49:07,301 --> 00:49:08,606
You pulled me through.

741
00:49:08,607 --> 00:49:11,870
Get out of town.
Fine, fine, fine.

742
00:49:11,871 --> 00:49:13,480
Don't believe me,

743
00:49:13,481 --> 00:49:16,092
but I'm tellin' ya one thing, buddy boy.

744
00:49:16,093 --> 00:49:19,791
<i>It was a lot easier
pulling you through tonight</i>

745
00:49:19,792 --> 00:49:21,401
than it was last night.

746
00:49:26,146 --> 00:49:28,626
- Oh.
- Maurice, why'd you do that?

747
00:49:30,846 --> 00:49:33,980
- Oh!
- Nice ass.

748
00:49:35,851 --> 00:49:37,417
I'm good in Twister, too. Wow.

749
00:49:39,594 --> 00:49:42,553
<i>Not even my mother
sees me in my boxer shorts.</i>

750
00:49:42,554 --> 00:49:45,382
Well, do you ever see her in hers?

751
00:49:45,383 --> 00:49:49,516
Say, Bri, don't you have
any cheese in your life, bud?

752
00:49:49,517 --> 00:49:52,389
Cheese?
What kind?

753
00:49:52,390 --> 00:49:55,087
- "Madem-oiselles."
- What?

754
00:49:55,088 --> 00:49:57,437
Squeeze, tomatoes,

755
00:49:57,438 --> 00:49:59,918
broads, chicks, girls.

756
00:49:59,919 --> 00:50:01,876
I said, girls.

757
00:50:01,877 --> 00:50:03,835
Don't you have anybody else
in your life besides your mother

758
00:50:03,836 --> 00:50:06,404
who wears an over-the-shoulder boulder holder?

759
00:50:18,068 --> 00:50:19,808
I think your babe just barked.

760
00:50:21,636 --> 00:50:24,986
<i>So, uh, what's this
Kiersten dame like, huh?</i>

761
00:50:24,987 --> 00:50:29,121
Personally, I'm a--
I'm a wart and mole kinda guy.

762
00:50:29,122 --> 00:50:30,514
Huh?
Huh?

763
00:50:30,515 --> 00:50:32,951
Hey, I'm talkin' to you.

764
00:50:32,952 --> 00:50:34,866
Oh, well, she's pretty neat,

765
00:50:34,867 --> 00:50:37,390
but she is a girl.

766
00:50:37,391 --> 00:50:40,001
You know, real smart,
always knows the answer,

767
00:50:40,002 --> 00:50:41,742
always raises her hand.

768
00:50:41,743 --> 00:50:44,180
- Always has her homework done?
- Exactly.

769
00:50:44,181 --> 00:50:46,486
I amaze me.

770
00:50:46,487 --> 00:50:49,055
Okay, Gumby, showtime.

771
00:50:52,145 --> 00:50:55,626
I don't believe it.
She likes me.

772
00:50:55,627 --> 00:50:57,367
I thought she hated me.

773
00:50:57,368 --> 00:50:59,456
Why would anybody hate you, Bri?

774
00:50:59,457 --> 00:51:01,414
All you are is ugly.

775
00:51:01,415 --> 00:51:03,460
Hey, Brian, Brian, I want you to meet
a couple friends of mine.

776
00:51:03,461 --> 00:51:04,983
This is Barbie and this is Midge.

777
00:51:04,984 --> 00:51:07,594
These chicks are so close to my heart.

778
00:51:07,595 --> 00:51:10,380
No, it's just that ever since we moved here,

779
00:51:10,381 --> 00:51:13,557
I haven't really been able to
make friends, other than you.

780
00:51:13,558 --> 00:51:15,428
And I never thought anybody really cared.

781
00:51:15,429 --> 00:51:16,951
Least of all Kiersten.

782
00:51:16,952 --> 00:51:18,562
Oh, Brian.

783
00:51:18,563 --> 00:51:20,912
Every--
everybody cares.

784
00:51:20,913 --> 00:51:23,044
It's just that--
it's just that certain people

785
00:51:23,045 --> 00:51:24,568
have a different way of showing it.

786
00:51:24,569 --> 00:51:27,528
Some people are more giving
than other people, right?

787
00:51:30,531 --> 00:51:32,184
There ya go, bud.
Enjoy yourself.

788
00:51:32,185 --> 00:51:34,534
Thank you. Thank you very much.
I'll keep this.

789
00:51:34,535 --> 00:51:36,754
Hey, look at her flipbook.

790
00:51:36,755 --> 00:51:39,975
<i>Isn't this neat?
I can't believe it.</i>

791
00:51:47,766 --> 00:51:49,726
You know, I thought of this.
I gave her this idea.

792
00:51:57,254 --> 00:52:00,212
Man's best friend--
his right hand.

793
00:52:02,868 --> 00:52:05,218
Good boy.
Good boy.

794
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:16,707
<i>Fine, I won't stay here anymore.</i>

795
00:52:16,708 --> 00:52:18,448
<i>I'll just sleep in the office
and send you the check.</i>

796
00:52:18,449 --> 00:52:20,450
<i>I wouldn't notice the difference.</i>

797
00:52:20,451 --> 00:52:22,843
<i>That's all you want from me,
my paycheck.</i>

798
00:52:22,844 --> 00:52:24,889
<i>Well, that's not all I want from you.
That's all I get.</i>

799
00:52:24,890 --> 00:52:26,717
<i>I don't know what
you're talking about.</i>

800
00:52:26,718 --> 00:52:28,762
<i>Mr. I've Got a Headache.</i>

801
00:52:28,763 --> 00:52:31,243
<i>We don't even need a door
because we're always fighting.</i>

802
00:52:31,244 --> 00:52:33,898
<i>- Fine, we won't fight anymore.
- Take away the fighting,</i>

803
00:52:33,899 --> 00:52:35,943
<i>there's nothing left
of our marriage at all!</i>

804
00:52:35,944 --> 00:52:37,771
<i>Keep your voice down.
The kids'll hear you.</i>

805
00:52:37,772 --> 00:52:40,948
- Brian?
<i>- Now you care about the kids?</i>

806
00:52:46,738 --> 00:52:48,521
Brian?

807
00:52:48,522 --> 00:52:50,698
Can I have a flashlight?

808
00:53:05,626 --> 00:53:08,324
<i>- Oh, shit!
- It's Snik!</i>

809
00:53:08,325 --> 00:53:12,066
<i>It's Snik! It's Snik!</i>

810
00:53:12,067 --> 00:53:13,895
<i>Run, run, run!</i>

811
00:53:15,419 --> 00:53:18,116
Arn, Arn, Arn.

812
00:53:18,117 --> 00:53:20,684
Arn.

813
00:53:20,685 --> 00:53:23,687
You know, Boy gets what he wants.

814
00:53:23,688 --> 00:53:25,254
When he asks you for a favor,

815
00:53:25,255 --> 00:53:27,604
you should take that as a compliment.

816
00:53:27,605 --> 00:53:29,214
But I tried.

817
00:53:29,215 --> 00:53:31,216
You've gotta believe me, Snik.
I tried.

818
00:53:31,217 --> 00:53:35,002
Oh, you tried, did you, Arnold?

819
00:53:35,003 --> 00:53:36,830
Well, you didn't
try hard enough!

820
00:53:36,831 --> 00:53:39,833
- My knees, they hurt!
- Oh, your knees hurt?

821
00:53:39,834 --> 00:53:42,445
That's not all that's gonna hurt, Arnold.
You know why?

822
00:53:42,446 --> 00:53:46,275
'Cause I'm gonna take my
big thumb and jam it in your eye!

823
00:53:46,276 --> 00:53:48,233
Now I'm gonna take my finger
and put it in the corner of your mouth,

824
00:53:48,234 --> 00:53:50,191
and I'm gonna rip the corner of your mouth out.

825
00:53:50,192 --> 00:53:52,672
That's good for a laugh, isn't it?

826
00:53:52,673 --> 00:53:54,413
Huh?

827
00:53:54,414 --> 00:53:56,415
You're scared of me,
aren't you, Arnold?

828
00:53:56,416 --> 00:53:59,331
Oh, I like that.

829
00:54:02,030 --> 00:54:05,555
I love that.

830
00:54:05,556 --> 00:54:08,340
But do you know what I like
even more than that, Arnold?

831
00:54:08,341 --> 00:54:12,562
I like taking my two big, black

832
00:54:12,563 --> 00:54:16,435
leather-gloved hands and grabbing your head

833
00:54:16,436 --> 00:54:19,177
and tearing it off!

834
00:54:21,702 --> 00:54:25,184
Hey, hey!
Boy gets what he wants!

835
00:54:30,668 --> 00:54:34,148
Hey, remember,
Boy always gets what he wants!

836
00:54:34,149 --> 00:54:37,848
Never, ever, ever forget that!

837
00:54:37,849 --> 00:54:41,068
Ever!

838
00:54:41,069 --> 00:54:43,288
Well, you didn't have
to mess up her room.

839
00:54:43,289 --> 00:54:46,465
Bud, there's one rule.

840
00:54:46,466 --> 00:54:50,556
It's you never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever

841
00:54:50,557 --> 00:54:54,430
get emotionally involved with the victim, ever.

842
00:54:54,431 --> 00:54:57,041
Maurice, she was starting to like me.

843
00:54:58,783 --> 00:55:00,958
I can't wait to see her tomorrow.

844
00:55:04,702 --> 00:55:06,703
Let me show you this, bud.
You're gonna love this.

845
00:55:06,704 --> 00:55:08,618
- Yeah.
- This is great.

846
00:55:08,619 --> 00:55:10,794
Look, look.

847
00:55:17,279 --> 00:55:18,715
How do you play this?

848
00:55:18,716 --> 00:55:22,849
Whoa!

849
00:55:22,850 --> 00:55:25,852
Come here. It's simple.
Let me show you, bud.

850
00:55:25,853 --> 00:55:28,333
- All right, we get the shit...
- Uh-huh.

851
00:55:28,334 --> 00:55:30,422
- ...we smash the shit...
- Yes.

852
00:55:30,423 --> 00:55:32,816
...and then we put the shit back.
It's called monsterball.

853
00:55:32,817 --> 00:55:35,166
We do the bashin',
you get the thrashin'.

854
00:55:35,167 --> 00:55:37,560
Let's play ball.
Come on, bud.

855
00:56:17,035 --> 00:56:19,646
<i>- Oh, my God!
- My God!</i>

856
00:57:06,693 --> 00:57:10,435
Rawr!

857
00:57:10,436 --> 00:57:12,655
No, no, please!

858
00:57:12,656 --> 00:57:15,136
Hang on!

859
00:57:18,618 --> 00:57:19,966
He's a new kid.
He's with me.

860
00:57:19,967 --> 00:57:22,534
- He's with me, Snik.
- Maurice.

861
00:57:22,535 --> 00:57:24,971
No one should ever, ever, ever

862
00:57:24,972 --> 00:57:27,147
come this close to Boy's stairway.

863
00:57:27,148 --> 00:57:29,628
Right.
Never, ever, ever

864
00:57:29,629 --> 00:57:31,978
come this close to Boy's stairway.

865
00:57:31,979 --> 00:57:34,024
<i>Hey, kid, you want a fresh fly?</i>

866
00:57:34,025 --> 00:57:36,374
No, no!

867
00:57:36,375 --> 00:57:37,984
Okay.

868
00:57:37,985 --> 00:57:40,334
I could break his neck, Maurice.
I could.

869
00:57:40,335 --> 00:57:41,945
Let's drop him.

870
00:57:41,946 --> 00:57:43,555
No!
He's just kidding.

871
00:57:43,556 --> 00:57:45,470
Snik, think of this.

872
00:57:45,471 --> 00:57:47,646
Dead people have limited potential,

873
00:57:47,647 --> 00:57:50,780
and I don't think that Boy
would like damaged goods.

874
00:57:50,781 --> 00:57:52,651
But it's your responsibility and--

875
00:57:52,652 --> 00:57:56,133
No, no, he's <i>your responsibility, Maurice.</i>

876
00:57:56,134 --> 00:57:57,569
Right.
My respons--

877
00:57:57,570 --> 00:58:00,572
You screw up, I drop you!

878
00:58:00,573 --> 00:58:03,575
That's fair.
Let's go, bud.

879
00:58:03,576 --> 00:58:08,450
Oh, my back.

880
00:58:16,458 --> 00:58:19,286
Go on, run.
Go, go, go, go.

881
00:58:19,287 --> 00:58:21,941
Go, go, go.

882
00:58:21,942 --> 00:58:24,161
Damn it, Maurice, who was that?

883
00:58:24,162 --> 00:58:25,815
- Who, Snik?
- Yeah.

884
00:58:25,816 --> 00:58:28,861
Ah, all talk.
Just a big mouth.

885
00:58:28,862 --> 00:58:32,082
And ever since he developed
that hump, he's been such a bitch.

886
00:58:32,083 --> 00:58:35,476
But you learn to stay away
from Snik and this staircase.

887
00:58:35,477 --> 00:58:37,348
- Okay, bud?
- No kidding.

888
00:58:37,349 --> 00:58:40,394
Let's move it.
You're such a doll.

889
00:58:40,395 --> 00:58:42,353
Come on.

890
00:58:42,354 --> 00:58:44,181
<i>But he wasn't there.</i>

891
00:58:44,182 --> 00:58:46,966
- Was the window open?
- I don't know, I didn't check.

892
00:58:46,967 --> 00:58:49,882
Hmm.
Maybe he went outside.

893
00:58:49,883 --> 00:58:53,930
Maybe he stepped outside to
smoke a cigarette. I bet that's it.

894
00:58:53,931 --> 00:58:56,410
- At 4:00 in the morning?
- Hmm.

895
00:58:56,411 --> 00:58:59,892
...with the ashes and how they
preserved the city of Pompeii--

896
00:58:59,893 --> 00:59:02,329
<i>- Was that visible?
- Yes, it was very-- you brought that up. Great.</i>

897
00:59:02,330 --> 00:59:04,418
And I think that--

898
00:59:04,419 --> 00:59:07,900
well, Mr. Stevenson,
thank you for joining us.

899
00:59:07,901 --> 00:59:09,859
<i>Please come in.</i>

900
00:59:09,860 --> 00:59:12,426
<i>You're just in time
for Kiersten's presentation.</i>

901
00:59:12,427 --> 00:59:14,385
Kiersten, are you ready?

902
00:59:14,386 --> 00:59:17,606
- Yes, I am, Mr. Finn.
- Oh, look at this.

903
00:59:17,607 --> 00:59:20,130
- Wow.
- Wonderful.

904
00:59:20,131 --> 00:59:21,653
Thank you.

905
00:59:21,654 --> 00:59:23,524
- Do you have your research report?
- Yes.

906
00:59:23,525 --> 00:59:25,179
<i>Okay.</i>

907
00:59:29,531 --> 00:59:31,837
I-- I thought I did.

908
00:59:31,838 --> 00:59:33,317
Maurice.

909
00:59:33,318 --> 00:59:35,928
I guess my dog chewed it up.

910
00:59:35,929 --> 00:59:40,019
Oh, right, you don't even have a dog.

911
00:59:40,020 --> 00:59:42,632
<i>- All right, that's enough.
- It's not funny.</i>

912
00:59:52,250 --> 00:59:55,556
Oh, hey, Brian!
Nothing to worry about.

913
00:59:55,557 --> 00:59:58,255
Only a drill.

914
00:59:58,256 --> 01:00:01,345
Hey, pard', what's with the light?
Something personal?

915
01:00:01,346 --> 01:00:03,216
- Yeah, you.
- Me?

916
01:00:03,217 --> 01:00:05,218
Your only friend in the whole world?

917
01:00:05,219 --> 01:00:09,266
Whoa! Window pain!

918
01:00:09,267 --> 01:00:12,008
My used-to-be only friend in
the whole wide world.

919
01:00:12,009 --> 01:00:13,662
You messed up Kiersten's homework.

920
01:00:13,663 --> 01:00:16,012
What?
What did I do to the homework?

921
01:00:16,013 --> 01:00:18,405
You chewed it up.
You destroyed it.

922
01:00:18,406 --> 01:00:20,104
You know she got a zero because of you?

923
01:00:22,149 --> 01:00:24,542
Brian, I was hungry, okay?

924
01:00:24,543 --> 01:00:26,196
And it just so--

925
01:00:26,197 --> 01:00:28,415
it just so happened at
that moment I had a craving

926
01:00:28,416 --> 01:00:31,854
for a six-page paper on the daytime
blooming of a nighttime cactus.

927
01:00:31,855 --> 01:00:33,333
And I'll tell you something else.

928
01:00:33,334 --> 01:00:35,031
I got incredible heartburn from that.

929
01:00:35,032 --> 01:00:36,772
I can't believe you did that.

930
01:00:36,773 --> 01:00:39,165
I asked you not to and you just
went ahead and did it anyway.

931
01:00:39,166 --> 01:00:41,603
<i>Brian, I happened to have a--</i>

932
01:00:45,738 --> 01:00:47,652
You like her, don't you?

933
01:00:47,653 --> 01:00:50,829
- No, I don't.
- Mm, yes, you do.

934
01:00:50,830 --> 01:00:53,440
- No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.

935
01:00:53,441 --> 01:00:56,443
- No, I don't.
- Brian's got a girlfriend. Brian's got a girlfriend.

936
01:00:56,444 --> 01:00:58,184
- No, I don't!
- <i>Brian's got a girlfriend.</i>

937
01:00:58,185 --> 01:01:00,709
Brian's got a girlfriend.
Yes, you do.

938
01:01:00,710 --> 01:01:03,886
Would it help the boo-boo
if I said I was sorry, huh?

939
01:01:03,887 --> 01:01:05,801
Here, look, just go back
to your dumb underworld

940
01:01:05,802 --> 01:01:07,934
and leave me and Eric alone.

941
01:01:21,687 --> 01:01:24,689
Dad, what is it?

942
01:01:24,690 --> 01:01:26,691
Hey, Brian, come downstairs with me.

943
01:01:26,692 --> 01:01:29,477
Your mom and I want to talk
to you and Eric for a minute.

944
01:01:39,749 --> 01:01:41,837
You want a ride?

945
01:01:41,838 --> 01:01:43,578
Sure, Daddy.

946
01:01:51,717 --> 01:01:54,719
<i>We wanted to talk
to the both of you because,</i>

947
01:01:54,720 --> 01:01:57,853
well, your mother and I
have come to a decision

948
01:01:57,854 --> 01:02:00,899
and it affects all of us.

949
01:02:00,900 --> 01:02:03,902
We figure you're grown-up
enough to understand.

950
01:02:03,903 --> 01:02:07,993
Mom and I have decided that we're
not gonna live together for a while.

951
01:02:07,994 --> 01:02:11,127
A business trip?

952
01:02:11,128 --> 01:02:13,216
No, honey, not exactly.

953
01:02:13,217 --> 01:02:16,437
Eric, don't you get it?
They're getting a divorce.

954
01:02:18,700 --> 01:02:22,355
No, Brian, we are not getting a divorce.

955
01:02:22,356 --> 01:02:24,575
Yeah, right.

956
01:02:24,576 --> 01:02:27,621
It's just that your father and I

957
01:02:27,622 --> 01:02:29,319
need to work some things out

958
01:02:29,320 --> 01:02:30,929
and we feel it would be better--

959
01:02:30,930 --> 01:02:34,585
Look, it's just, like--
it's a trial separation.

960
01:02:34,586 --> 01:02:37,370
Oh, God, sorry. That's what you do
before you get a divorce.

961
01:02:37,371 --> 01:02:39,503
Brian, we're not getting a divorce.

962
01:02:39,504 --> 01:02:41,374
- So Dad's not leaving?
- Eric...

963
01:02:41,375 --> 01:02:43,550
- Good.
- ...listen to me.

964
01:02:43,551 --> 01:02:45,117
I have to live in the city for a while.

965
01:02:45,118 --> 01:02:46,684
Hopefully it won't be for long.

966
01:02:46,685 --> 01:02:49,993
- No, you don't have to go.
- Yes, I do.

967
01:02:52,169 --> 01:02:54,257
Yes, I do.

968
01:02:54,258 --> 01:02:56,215
<i>But, look, we'll get to talk every day.</i>

969
01:02:56,216 --> 01:02:59,566
I'll be good, I promise.
I'll be better.

970
01:02:59,567 --> 01:03:01,307
You won't have to go live in the city.

971
01:03:01,308 --> 01:03:03,614
I swear to God I'll be better.

972
01:03:03,615 --> 01:03:05,878
Brian, too.
He promises, right?

973
01:03:07,793 --> 01:03:11,230
Eric, it's not your fault.

974
01:03:11,231 --> 01:03:13,537
And it's not Brian's fault.

975
01:03:13,538 --> 01:03:15,844
It isn't anybody's fault.

976
01:03:15,845 --> 01:03:18,890
It isn't anybody's fault.

977
01:03:23,853 --> 01:03:27,465
- Bri, you all right?
- Oh, yeah, Dad. I'm just fine.

978
01:04:24,522 --> 01:04:27,002
I heard it all.

979
01:04:27,003 --> 01:04:28,961
Sucks, huh?

980
01:04:31,442 --> 01:04:32,964
Yep.

981
01:04:32,965 --> 01:04:34,924
It's not too good.

982
01:04:36,534 --> 01:04:39,579
- I hate them.
- No, you don't.

983
01:04:39,580 --> 01:04:41,320
No, you don't.

984
01:04:41,321 --> 01:04:43,410
At least you have a family.

985
01:04:49,416 --> 01:04:51,896
Believe it or not,

986
01:04:51,897 --> 01:04:54,465
you're the only real friend I have.

987
01:04:56,641 --> 01:04:59,034
Why do you think I keep coming back?

988
01:04:59,035 --> 01:05:00,905
If I didn't like you,
I'd have your parents

989
01:05:00,906 --> 01:05:02,952
blaming you for the shooting of Abe Lincoln.

990
01:05:05,606 --> 01:05:08,695
Come on down.
It'll cheer you up. Come on.

991
01:05:08,696 --> 01:05:11,263
I don't really feel like being cheery.

992
01:05:11,264 --> 01:05:13,004
Oh, Bri, baby.

993
01:05:13,005 --> 01:05:16,269
Pranks, snacks, games.

994
01:05:18,968 --> 01:05:22,057
It'll take away the hurt.
Come on.

995
01:05:22,058 --> 01:05:24,537
You know what we could do?
We could go see Kiersten.

996
01:05:24,538 --> 01:05:27,366
We'll bring her flowers.

997
01:05:27,367 --> 01:05:29,847
Ooh, I've got a great idea.
We'll go to Ronnie Coleman's

998
01:05:29,848 --> 01:05:31,805
and we'll loosen all
the bolts on his furniture.

999
01:05:31,806 --> 01:05:33,851
What do you say, huh?

1000
01:05:33,852 --> 01:05:35,722
It'll be quick.
It's good for your bones.

1001
01:05:35,723 --> 01:05:38,856
Cross my heart and hope to die.
Come on.

1002
01:05:38,857 --> 01:05:40,989
Huh? Huh? Huh?

1003
01:05:40,990 --> 01:05:42,903
- Okay.
- All right!

1004
01:05:42,904 --> 01:05:45,384
Whoo!
Come on.

1005
01:05:46,778 --> 01:05:48,998
All right!

1006
01:05:51,174 --> 01:05:53,045
Alley-oop.

1007
01:05:56,875 --> 01:05:59,137
- Uh, you all right, bud?
- Yeah, I'm fine.

1008
01:05:59,138 --> 01:06:01,052
Hey, where's the party?

1009
01:06:01,053 --> 01:06:03,446
- Night-light out at the Grossbergs'.
- Oh.

1010
01:06:03,447 --> 01:06:05,839
Coming through.
New guy.

1011
01:06:05,840 --> 01:06:07,580
Coming-- excuse me.

1012
01:06:07,581 --> 01:06:09,495
Move over.
Come on, bud.

1013
01:06:09,496 --> 01:06:11,280
Is the line with the tickets?

1014
01:06:11,281 --> 01:06:14,631
Come on, bud.
Whoo, new guy.

1015
01:06:20,290 --> 01:06:22,682
<i>Hey, bud.</i>

1016
01:06:26,209 --> 01:06:28,949
We're here.

1017
01:06:28,950 --> 01:06:30,821
Bri, I'd like you to meet some of my friends.

1018
01:06:30,822 --> 01:06:35,304
This is Sherry, Debbie,
Pumpkin, Bernie.

1019
01:06:35,305 --> 01:06:37,132
This is great.
Well, let's do it, man.

1020
01:06:37,133 --> 01:06:39,699
<i>This is fun.
Scare the hell out of her, Bri.</i>

1021
01:06:39,700 --> 01:06:41,875
Go ahead, Tonto.
Make her poop her Pampers.

1022
01:06:41,876 --> 01:06:45,009
Make her doodie her diapers.
Make her caca her crib.

1023
01:06:45,010 --> 01:06:47,403
Watch this, he's great.
Go ahead, bud.

1024
01:06:47,404 --> 01:06:50,275
Maurice, it's just a little baby.

1025
01:06:50,276 --> 01:06:52,364
Baby, baby, baby.
It's our duty, man.

1026
01:06:52,365 --> 01:06:54,018
This is a character builder.

1027
01:06:54,019 --> 01:06:56,368
Come on, Tonto.
Scare the hell out of her.

1028
01:06:56,369 --> 01:06:58,283
<i>Watch this, guys.
Watch this.</i>

1029
01:06:58,284 --> 01:07:00,068
<i>Go ahead. Go.</i>

1030
01:07:00,069 --> 01:07:02,070
Scare the hell out of her.

1031
01:07:02,071 --> 01:07:03,854
- Boo.
- "Boo"?

1032
01:07:03,855 --> 01:07:06,857
- Boo.
- "Boo"? What, are you the boo fairy?

1033
01:07:11,863 --> 01:07:14,952
Stop it.

1034
01:07:14,953 --> 01:07:16,388
Come on, stop it!

1035
01:07:16,389 --> 01:07:19,217
Oh, Brian, relax, okay?

1036
01:07:19,218 --> 01:07:22,002
Maurice, this is cruel.

1037
01:07:25,616 --> 01:07:28,271
<i>Baby.</i>

1038
01:07:32,927 --> 01:07:34,886
<i>- Light!
- Brian!</i>

1039
01:07:55,820 --> 01:07:58,169
Whoa!

1040
01:07:58,170 --> 01:08:01,042
Todd, are you okay?
What happened?

1041
01:08:02,435 --> 01:08:03,828
Brian!

1042
01:08:26,677 --> 01:08:28,679
I'm shrinking.

1043
01:08:33,727 --> 01:08:35,816
Something's wrong.

1044
01:08:50,309 --> 01:08:52,919
So, um, how are the kids taking it?

1045
01:08:52,920 --> 01:08:55,357
Oh, they're fine.
Eric went to school.

1046
01:08:55,358 --> 01:08:57,098
Brian stayed home.
He's upstairs...

1047
01:08:58,883 --> 01:09:01,276
sawing the legs off all the beds.

1048
01:09:03,540 --> 01:09:06,803
Okay, so, I guess each kid

1049
01:09:06,804 --> 01:09:10,459
just has his own way of dealing with it.

1050
01:09:10,460 --> 01:09:12,810
Beats being an axe murderer in 10 years.

1051
01:09:14,899 --> 01:09:16,814
<i>Yeah.</i>

1052
01:09:18,946 --> 01:09:20,382
<i>Just give me a second.</i>

1053
01:09:20,383 --> 01:09:22,122
I can-- I'll--

1054
01:09:22,123 --> 01:09:24,908
We almost had him.

1055
01:09:24,909 --> 01:09:26,475
He was becoming one of us!

1056
01:09:28,652 --> 01:09:30,479
He knows our secrets, Maurice.

1057
01:09:30,480 --> 01:09:32,176
He's harmless.
I'll yell ya--

1058
01:09:32,177 --> 01:09:33,612
you know what?
Let's leave him alone.

1059
01:09:33,613 --> 01:09:34,961
We'll just leave him alone and--

1060
01:09:34,962 --> 01:09:36,354
You just don't get it, Maurice.

1061
01:09:36,355 --> 01:09:38,574
Sometimes Boy gets a little lonely.

1062
01:09:38,575 --> 01:09:41,098
He wanted to play with him.

1063
01:09:41,099 --> 01:09:43,100
Why doesn't he just play with himself?

1064
01:09:43,101 --> 01:09:45,668
"Why doesn't Boy play with himself"?

1065
01:09:45,669 --> 01:09:48,018
Yeah.

1066
01:09:48,019 --> 01:09:50,063
- Come here.
- No, don't get me upset, Snik.

1067
01:09:50,064 --> 01:09:53,937
You know what happens when I get upset.

1068
01:09:53,938 --> 01:09:55,634
That's it, I'm upset.

1069
01:09:59,422 --> 01:10:01,379
What the hell is that?

1070
01:10:01,380 --> 01:10:03,425
I don't know.
That's what happens when I get upset.

1071
01:10:08,431 --> 01:10:10,388
- You know something?
- What? No.

1072
01:10:10,389 --> 01:10:14,218
I don't like you, Maurice.
You're always trying to be so funny.

1073
01:10:14,219 --> 01:10:16,394
- Well, I got a little riddle for you.
- Okay.

1074
01:10:16,395 --> 01:10:21,051
What happens when Boy doesn't get what he wants?

1075
01:10:21,052 --> 01:10:23,401
I don't know.
I have a hunch.

1076
01:10:23,402 --> 01:10:25,229
Hunch?

1077
01:10:25,230 --> 01:10:27,187
Is that my hunch you're
talking about, Maurice?

1078
01:10:27,188 --> 01:10:28,928
Oh, no, no, no.
I take it back.

1079
01:10:28,929 --> 01:10:31,366
- Back? Hunchback?!
- No!

1080
01:10:31,367 --> 01:10:34,238
You bring a kid in here,
you tell him our secrets?

1081
01:10:34,239 --> 01:10:36,327
<i>My horn!</i>

1082
01:10:36,328 --> 01:10:38,287
If you can't get him, I will.

1083
01:11:13,234 --> 01:11:15,628
<i>Mom!</i>

1084
01:11:22,548 --> 01:11:25,376
Brian.
Wake up, wake up.

1085
01:11:25,377 --> 01:11:27,683
Eric's gone. Have you seen him?
Do you know where he went?

1086
01:11:27,684 --> 01:11:29,728
Gone?
He's gone?

1087
01:11:29,729 --> 01:11:32,035
Look, Brian, if you know anything,
tell me right now.

1088
01:11:32,036 --> 01:11:34,037
- He's not in his room?
- No.

1089
01:11:34,038 --> 01:11:35,865
Do you think he went to see Daddy?

1090
01:11:35,866 --> 01:11:38,911
- He wouldn't do that, would he?
- No.

1091
01:11:38,912 --> 01:11:41,045
Todd's house.
Maybe he's there.

1092
01:12:14,992 --> 01:12:17,907
Come on, Toad, be awake.

1093
01:12:21,128 --> 01:12:22,433
All right.

1094
01:12:22,434 --> 01:12:24,348
Go away!

1095
01:12:24,349 --> 01:12:26,611
Toad, come on!
I need you and every spare flashlight

1096
01:12:26,612 --> 01:12:28,396
you have in the house now!

1097
01:12:28,397 --> 01:12:31,137
Leave me alone, Brian.
You're one of them.

1098
01:12:31,138 --> 01:12:34,533
Todd, listen to me.
They have Eric!

1099
01:12:39,146 --> 01:12:42,758
- Who has Eric?
- The monsters. They kidnapped him.

1100
01:12:42,759 --> 01:12:45,108
Kidnapped him?
Which monsters?

1101
01:12:45,109 --> 01:12:46,893
The little monsters!

1102
01:13:08,959 --> 01:13:12,265
- Hi, Kiersten.
- Brian, what's wrong?

1103
01:13:12,266 --> 01:13:14,224
I know you're not gonna believe it,

1104
01:13:14,225 --> 01:13:16,661
but I need some help on my science project.

1105
01:13:16,662 --> 01:13:18,707
Is this some sort of prank?

1106
01:13:18,708 --> 01:13:20,622
No, I'm serious.

1107
01:13:20,623 --> 01:13:22,493
Look, I need your key
to get into the supply room.

1108
01:13:22,494 --> 01:13:24,190
It's an emergency.

1109
01:13:24,191 --> 01:13:25,931
I need some lights.

1110
01:13:25,932 --> 01:13:28,412
Do you expect <i>me to believe that?</i>

1111
01:13:28,413 --> 01:13:31,067
It defies every rule known
to the scientific mind.

1112
01:13:31,068 --> 01:13:32,547
Oh, so you don't believe me?

1113
01:13:32,548 --> 01:13:34,027
Well, watch this.

1114
01:13:39,468 --> 01:13:41,425
Holy shit!

1115
01:13:41,426 --> 01:13:44,341
Amazing!

1116
01:14:26,732 --> 01:14:29,255
Okay, let's hope this works.

1117
01:14:29,256 --> 01:14:31,475
<i>Oh, man! That'll get 'em.</i>

1118
01:14:31,476 --> 01:14:33,608
<i>That's like a howitzer or something.</i>

1119
01:14:33,609 --> 01:14:35,392
<i>You must know a lot
about electricity to do that.</i>

1120
01:14:35,393 --> 01:14:37,829
<i>How come you get Fs in science?</i>

1121
01:14:37,830 --> 01:14:40,354
- Let's go.
- Yeah.

1122
01:14:48,885 --> 01:14:50,233
<i>What are you doing?</i>

1123
01:14:50,234 --> 01:14:52,148
I'm setting my alarm for sunrise.

1124
01:14:52,149 --> 01:14:53,584
<i>What the heck for?</i>

1125
01:14:53,585 --> 01:14:55,064
All right, when this goes off,

1126
01:14:55,065 --> 01:14:56,848
we have three to five minutes.

1127
01:14:56,849 --> 01:14:59,808
If we're not up before
the sun clears the horizon,

1128
01:14:59,809 --> 01:15:01,810
we turn into monsters.

1129
01:15:01,811 --> 01:15:04,421
- Monsters.
<i>- Monsters?</i>

1130
01:15:04,422 --> 01:15:06,597
You mean there's a chance
we might not make it?

1131
01:15:06,598 --> 01:15:09,513
Well, yeah, of course there's a chance.

1132
01:15:09,514 --> 01:15:12,821
I know where Eric is,
but I'm not leaving until I have him.

1133
01:15:12,822 --> 01:15:14,779
Are you still in?
You don't have to.

1134
01:15:14,780 --> 01:15:17,216
I'm in.
Eric's my best friend.

1135
01:15:17,217 --> 01:15:19,349
- Come on, let's go.
- Wait a minute.

1136
01:15:19,350 --> 01:15:21,612
Where are you going?
You're not leaving without me.

1137
01:15:21,613 --> 01:15:23,962
In the name of science,
I'm going.

1138
01:15:23,963 --> 01:15:25,964
Okay.

1139
01:15:25,965 --> 01:15:27,488
Let's do it.

1140
01:15:29,403 --> 01:15:30,969
You can't get through without me.

1141
01:15:30,970 --> 01:15:33,232
Hold on.
Ready?

1142
01:15:33,233 --> 01:15:35,539
I'm ready.

1143
01:15:35,540 --> 01:15:37,586
- Whoa!
- Whoa!

1144
01:15:43,243 --> 01:15:45,594
- It's a parallel dimension.
- Wow.

1145
01:15:49,598 --> 01:15:52,164
- Gimme that!
- My knapsack!

1146
01:15:57,823 --> 01:15:59,824
<i>Light!</i>

1147
01:15:59,825 --> 01:16:02,349
Light! Light!

1148
01:16:04,090 --> 01:16:05,395
No!

1149
01:16:05,396 --> 01:16:08,442
Light! Light!

1150
01:16:16,537 --> 01:16:18,234
This way.

1151
01:16:39,386 --> 01:16:41,518
That's the master staircase.

1152
01:16:41,519 --> 01:16:44,173
<i>It goes up to Boy's room.</i>

1153
01:16:44,174 --> 01:16:47,656
<i>- Who's Boy?
- The guy who runs this place.</i>

1154
01:16:48,918 --> 01:16:51,703
Stick with me.
I know the way.

1155
01:17:11,680 --> 01:17:13,115
Careful.

1156
01:17:13,116 --> 01:17:14,944
It's a long way down.

1157
01:18:08,649 --> 01:18:11,782
Brian Stevenson.

1158
01:18:11,783 --> 01:18:14,176
The real boy wonder.

1159
01:18:14,177 --> 01:18:16,482
<i>What a pleasure it is
to finally make your acquaintance.</i>

1160
01:18:16,483 --> 01:18:18,397
Where's Eric?

1161
01:18:18,398 --> 01:18:20,399
And you brought some little
playmates along with you.

1162
01:18:20,400 --> 01:18:22,053
How nice.

1163
01:18:22,054 --> 01:18:24,664
Are they as tactful and
fleet-footed as yourself?

1164
01:18:24,665 --> 01:18:26,275
I daresay they don't look it.

1165
01:18:26,276 --> 01:18:28,713
I want my brother!

1166
01:18:29,888 --> 01:18:32,672
Now, Brian...

1167
01:18:32,673 --> 01:18:35,458
what sort of a greeting is that?

1168
01:18:35,459 --> 01:18:38,156
After all, we are so much alike.

1169
01:18:38,157 --> 01:18:41,116
If you stay,

1170
01:18:41,117 --> 01:18:45,294
you'll be the one in charge of yourself.

1171
01:18:45,295 --> 01:18:50,212
Perhaps this whole world in time.

1172
01:18:50,213 --> 01:18:52,692
You'll be the one with the power,

1173
01:18:52,693 --> 01:18:54,564
<i>the authority.</i>

1174
01:18:54,565 --> 01:18:57,916
Not your parents,
not your teachers.

1175
01:18:59,309 --> 01:19:00,875
You.

1176
01:19:04,749 --> 01:19:07,751
<i>Now, Brian...</i>

1177
01:19:07,752 --> 01:19:09,753
isn't that what you want?

1178
01:19:13,889 --> 01:19:17,283
<i>I want Eric now!</i>

1179
01:19:18,894 --> 01:19:21,156
Brian...

1180
01:19:21,157 --> 01:19:23,028
why such cruelty?

1181
01:19:27,598 --> 01:19:33,299
You're a very unique individual, Brian.

1182
01:19:35,084 --> 01:19:39,261
Your feat's unprecedented here.

1183
01:19:39,262 --> 01:19:41,916
Why, I can scarcely remember the last time

1184
01:19:41,917 --> 01:19:44,701
one of our little breed had been trapped,

1185
01:19:44,702 --> 01:19:48,009
not once but numerous times.

1186
01:19:48,010 --> 01:19:51,490
Enough wind, loafer breath!
Hand over the kid!

1187
01:19:51,491 --> 01:19:53,102
Where is he?
Let's see him!

1188
01:19:54,581 --> 01:19:55,974
Very well.

1189
01:19:58,672 --> 01:20:00,238
Let's have the contestants

1190
01:20:00,239 --> 01:20:02,806
take a look behind curtain number one.

1191
01:20:10,293 --> 01:20:12,338
Brian?

1192
01:20:13,426 --> 01:20:14,863
<i>Brian.</i>

1193
01:20:21,739 --> 01:20:24,828
Let's make a deal.

1194
01:20:24,829 --> 01:20:28,614
It's your wits and grace that I desire,

1195
01:20:28,615 --> 01:20:31,574
not those of your pugnacious chum

1196
01:20:31,575 --> 01:20:34,925
<i>or even your silly,
mute little girlfriend.</i>

1197
01:20:34,926 --> 01:20:39,844
I'll let them all go,
and your brother...

1198
01:20:41,759 --> 01:20:45,675
if you'll stay

1199
01:20:45,676 --> 01:20:47,938
and be my pal.

1200
01:20:47,939 --> 01:20:49,419
No deals.

1201
01:20:51,551 --> 01:20:53,466
Very well.

1202
01:20:56,382 --> 01:20:58,427
Eric!

1203
01:21:00,604 --> 01:21:02,997
Let him go now!

1204
01:21:02,998 --> 01:21:05,042
I'll give you 10 seconds.

1205
01:21:05,043 --> 01:21:08,742
10, nine, eight...

1206
01:21:10,483 --> 01:21:12,745
Be sensible, Brian.

1207
01:21:12,746 --> 01:21:15,574
Why lose five lives when you can gain four?

1208
01:21:15,575 --> 01:21:18,055
In an hour, you and your
chums will all be monsters

1209
01:21:18,056 --> 01:21:19,709
and then we can all play.

1210
01:21:19,710 --> 01:21:23,191
- ...seven, six...
- Brian?

1211
01:21:23,192 --> 01:21:25,976
...five, four...

1212
01:21:25,977 --> 01:21:28,413
Hi-ya!

1213
01:21:28,414 --> 01:21:30,285
Let's blow 'em away, Brian!

1214
01:21:30,286 --> 01:21:32,026
...three--
let Eric go--

1215
01:21:32,027 --> 01:21:34,898
two, one!

1216
01:22:20,292 --> 01:22:22,902
Hi, are you looking for your brother?

1217
01:22:22,903 --> 01:22:25,775
Well, we've got him!

1218
01:22:25,776 --> 01:22:30,040
No!

1219
01:22:30,041 --> 01:22:33,565
I had hoped we could be friends, Brian.

1220
01:22:33,566 --> 01:22:36,960
But evidently you don't play fair.

1221
01:22:36,961 --> 01:22:41,008
- Boy, I haven't even begun to play.
- Let go!

1222
01:22:41,009 --> 01:22:45,316
Snik, show Brian to his room.

1223
01:22:45,317 --> 01:22:48,406
What? No!

1224
01:22:52,107 --> 01:22:54,587
Bye-bye, Brian!

1225
01:23:11,865 --> 01:23:14,693
Brian, it's you.

1226
01:23:14,694 --> 01:23:17,696
Todd, is Eric here?

1227
01:23:17,697 --> 01:23:20,352
- Nope.
- Kiersten.

1228
01:23:32,364 --> 01:23:34,366
Ow.

1229
01:23:36,368 --> 01:23:38,891
Maurice, what happened?

1230
01:23:38,892 --> 01:23:41,285
What happened?
What happened?

1231
01:23:41,286 --> 01:23:43,418
Two inches lower and this bonehead

1232
01:23:43,419 --> 01:23:45,594
would be talking to my lawyer, buddy boy.

1233
01:23:45,595 --> 01:23:47,248
You know him?
He's a monster.

1234
01:23:47,249 --> 01:23:49,554
Yeah. Todd, Kiersten,
this is Maurice.

1235
01:23:49,555 --> 01:23:52,949
<i>- Hi, pleasure to meet you.
- A monster? I have an idea.</i>

1236
01:23:52,950 --> 01:23:55,604
We can generate light
by wiring pencils to the phone.

1237
01:23:55,605 --> 01:23:58,085
Yo, babe, light from pencils?

1238
01:23:58,086 --> 01:24:02,045
And I'm the Pope.

1239
01:24:02,046 --> 01:24:04,396
Just like a carbon lamp from a projector.

1240
01:24:07,878 --> 01:24:10,184
- Done.
- Todd, you crank.

1241
01:24:10,185 --> 01:24:12,011
<i>Brian, you hold the pencils,</i>

1242
01:24:12,012 --> 01:24:14,101
and I'll slide the dirty laundry under the door.

1243
01:24:19,150 --> 01:24:20,759
Good idea.

1244
01:24:20,760 --> 01:24:22,326
Faster, Todd.

1245
01:24:22,327 --> 01:24:26,940
- Go, Toad, go! Go, Toad, go!
- Faster!

1246
01:24:28,681 --> 01:24:31,640
- Faster!
- I'm tryin'!

1247
01:24:31,641 --> 01:24:34,338
<i>- If at first you don't succeed...
- Come on!</i>

1248
01:24:34,339 --> 01:24:38,691
...try, try--
alive!

1249
01:24:59,538 --> 01:25:01,149
Okay, now, open the door.

1250
01:25:04,108 --> 01:25:07,632
Okay, Maurice, let us out.

1251
01:25:07,633 --> 01:25:11,245
<i>Any of you freaks know
how to pick a combination lock?</i>

1252
01:25:15,815 --> 01:25:18,295
Just jokin'.

1253
01:25:18,296 --> 01:25:21,472
What are you doing lying around?
We got work to do, bud.

1254
01:25:21,473 --> 01:25:23,518
Where are you going?

1255
01:25:23,519 --> 01:25:25,346
To get some more firepower.

1256
01:25:25,347 --> 01:25:27,566
Well, you see--

1257
01:25:30,003 --> 01:25:31,483
Let's go.

1258
01:25:38,751 --> 01:25:40,970
All right, let's boogie.

1259
01:25:40,971 --> 01:25:42,189
Come on.

1260
01:25:42,190 --> 01:25:43,451
Keep going, come on.

1261
01:25:46,716 --> 01:25:49,284
Oh, Ronnie.

1262
01:25:54,898 --> 01:25:56,681
<i>Only the sunlamps.</i>

1263
01:25:56,682 --> 01:25:59,554
<i>Oh, this is good.</i>

1264
01:25:59,555 --> 01:26:02,122
<i>Oh, yeah. That's good.</i>

1265
01:26:05,387 --> 01:26:07,345
Here we go!

1266
01:27:22,899 --> 01:27:24,422
Say good night, Boy!

1267
01:27:36,391 --> 01:27:39,132
Aw, shit!

1268
01:27:47,489 --> 01:27:51,579
<i>The beep. We gotta get outta here.</i>

1269
01:27:51,580 --> 01:27:54,277
Eric's here somewhere, I know it.

1270
01:27:54,278 --> 01:27:55,844
Come on!

1271
01:27:55,845 --> 01:27:57,280
Good luck.

1272
01:27:57,281 --> 01:27:59,326
Oh.

1273
01:27:59,327 --> 01:28:02,372
Wait till I get my hand--
I'm gonna kick your butt with this boot.

1274
01:28:02,373 --> 01:28:06,246
I gotta get it together.
I gotta get myself together.

1275
01:28:16,866 --> 01:28:18,823
Take the room.
You guys take the box.

1276
01:28:18,824 --> 01:28:22,174
- I got it.
- Right.

1277
01:28:22,175 --> 01:28:24,568
- Nope, nothing in there.
- Nothing?

1278
01:28:24,569 --> 01:28:26,527
<i>Brian?</i>

1279
01:28:26,528 --> 01:28:28,398
<i>Come here, Brian.</i>

1280
01:28:28,399 --> 01:28:31,053
- Help us with this one, guys.
<i>- Please.</i>

1281
01:28:31,054 --> 01:28:33,447
It won't budge.

1282
01:28:33,448 --> 01:28:35,797
- Look, a crank, a crank.
- It won't budge.

1283
01:28:38,801 --> 01:28:40,236
<i>Eric!</i>

1284
01:28:40,237 --> 01:28:43,326
- Eric!
- All right, man.

1285
01:28:43,327 --> 01:28:47,287
Come on, let's get outta here.

1286
01:28:52,641 --> 01:28:55,120
Oh, shit!

1287
01:28:55,121 --> 01:28:57,688
How much time?

1288
01:28:57,689 --> 01:29:00,387
Maybe a minute.

1289
01:29:00,388 --> 01:29:03,172
Great. Coleman,
you think you could take him?

1290
01:29:03,173 --> 01:29:04,695
No way!

1291
01:29:04,696 --> 01:29:07,655
Looks like there's no way out!

1292
01:29:11,834 --> 01:29:14,052
Oops.

1293
01:29:14,053 --> 01:29:16,794
Who is that guy?

1294
01:29:22,018 --> 01:29:23,976
Hey, Snik.

1295
01:29:25,587 --> 01:29:28,893
How about a light, bud?

1296
01:29:34,030 --> 01:29:36,118
Come on, let's go home!

1297
01:30:08,673 --> 01:30:10,805
Ding dong, the Snik is dead!

1298
01:30:10,806 --> 01:30:14,417
- Yeah!
<i>- Snik is dead! Snik is dead!</i>

1299
01:30:14,418 --> 01:30:16,812
Snik is dead!

1300
01:30:27,083 --> 01:30:29,868
Ow, ah.

1301
01:30:33,916 --> 01:30:35,831
Brian, Brian.

1302
01:30:37,354 --> 01:30:38,789
Wait.

1303
01:30:38,790 --> 01:30:41,531
- Let's go.
- Sit down.

1304
01:30:41,532 --> 01:30:45,667
- What?
- Brian, sit down.

1305
01:30:46,842 --> 01:30:48,757
It's--

1306
01:30:52,151 --> 01:30:55,067
It's-- it's too late.

1307
01:30:56,547 --> 01:30:58,635
What's that supposed to mean?

1308
01:30:58,636 --> 01:31:02,552
It means we've dissected our last frog.

1309
01:31:02,553 --> 01:31:05,817
We're stuck.
We're monsters.

1310
01:31:08,124 --> 01:31:10,560
Well, I can handle that.

1311
01:31:10,561 --> 01:31:13,302
Yeah.

1312
01:31:13,303 --> 01:31:15,174
Yeah, well, I can't.

1313
01:31:16,654 --> 01:31:19,787
Come on, follow me.

1314
01:31:19,788 --> 01:31:21,528
Whoa, where you going, bud?

1315
01:31:21,529 --> 01:31:24,052
<i>- West!
- Hey, Brian, wait up!</i>

1316
01:31:24,053 --> 01:31:25,619
- Yeah, Brian.
- Brian.

1317
01:31:25,620 --> 01:31:27,447
Hey, Brian, wait up!

1318
01:31:31,974 --> 01:31:34,324
- Come on!
- I'm coming!

1319
01:31:55,519 --> 01:31:57,346
Whoa, whoa.

1320
01:31:57,347 --> 01:31:59,087
Sun's up in St. Louis, bud.

1321
01:32:01,438 --> 01:32:04,483
Phoenix! Phoenix!
Where's Phoenix?

1322
01:32:04,484 --> 01:32:06,398
Huh, Phoenix?
Thataway!

1323
01:32:06,399 --> 01:32:08,097
Thataway.
Come on, kids.

1324
01:32:23,155 --> 01:32:24,895
Ah, ooh, ooh, ah, ooh.

1325
01:32:24,896 --> 01:32:27,637
Whoa, hey, Bob.
Guess the sun's up, huh?

1326
01:32:27,638 --> 01:32:29,030
I got it.
It's really smoking.

1327
01:32:29,031 --> 01:32:31,816
Ooh, ooh, ah, ah.
Try California!

1328
01:33:06,372 --> 01:33:08,286
All right!

1329
01:33:08,287 --> 01:33:10,506
Come on, kids!
You're going home!

1330
01:33:10,507 --> 01:33:12,595
- All right!
- We're coming!

1331
01:33:12,596 --> 01:33:14,945
- Yeah.
- Here we go. Goin' home.

1332
01:33:14,946 --> 01:33:16,731
Going up.
Yeah.

1333
01:33:21,039 --> 01:33:22,910
Wow.

1334
01:33:22,911 --> 01:33:24,389
- We're going home.
- You're going home.

1335
01:33:24,390 --> 01:33:26,088
Whoo!

1336
01:33:30,962 --> 01:33:34,226
- Come on.
- We're going home, guys.

1337
01:33:42,191 --> 01:33:47,675
- Come on.
- Radical, man.

1338
01:33:52,897 --> 01:33:54,594
Come on, yeah.

1339
01:33:56,988 --> 01:33:59,469
Come on, Ronnie.

1340
01:34:02,428 --> 01:34:05,170
Oh, pardon me, sir.

1341
01:34:08,260 --> 01:34:09,522
Well...

1342
01:34:12,047 --> 01:34:13,526
you're next.

1343
01:34:17,487 --> 01:34:19,707
Kinda wish I could stay.

1344
01:34:21,230 --> 01:34:23,274
You'd be a hero down here.

1345
01:34:23,275 --> 01:34:27,017
Maurice, my arm--
I mean, it turned to clothes last night.

1346
01:34:27,018 --> 01:34:30,325
Don't worry about that.
You'll sleep that off.

1347
01:34:30,326 --> 01:34:32,849
Nothing's permanent unless
you get trapped down here, bud.

1348
01:34:34,156 --> 01:34:37,680
But I suppose you gotta get up there

1349
01:34:37,681 --> 01:34:39,682
'cause you're gonna get married pretty soon.

1350
01:34:39,683 --> 01:34:42,598
Married?
To who?

1351
01:34:42,599 --> 01:34:45,863
Well, to Lightbulb, Red.

1352
01:34:46,951 --> 01:34:50,258
Oh, Kiersten?
No.

1353
01:34:50,259 --> 01:34:51,868
Just friends.

1354
01:34:51,869 --> 01:34:54,828
Friends.

1355
01:34:54,829 --> 01:34:56,699
Yeah.

1356
01:34:56,700 --> 01:34:59,310
Well...

1357
01:34:59,311 --> 01:35:01,399
I guess that's what it's all about, huh?

1358
01:35:01,400 --> 01:35:03,793
Yeah.

1359
01:35:03,794 --> 01:35:07,057
I guess.

1360
01:35:07,058 --> 01:35:10,408
- You know what?
- What?

1361
01:35:10,409 --> 01:35:12,324
You're the best friend I've ever had.

1362
01:35:14,936 --> 01:35:16,676
Well...

1363
01:35:18,330 --> 01:35:21,724
you're the ugliest friend I ever had.

1364
01:35:21,725 --> 01:35:23,813
But you belong up there.
Come on.

1365
01:35:23,814 --> 01:35:25,989
I'm gonna miss you, Maurice.

1366
01:35:25,990 --> 01:35:27,991
I really am.

1367
01:35:27,992 --> 01:35:30,820
<i>Let's go, Brian.
The sun's coming up.</i>

1368
01:35:30,821 --> 01:35:33,476
There's no way I'm running to Hawaii.

1369
01:35:36,566 --> 01:35:40,483
Hang on.

1370
01:35:45,096 --> 01:35:46,836
Oh, no, Maurice.

1371
01:35:46,837 --> 01:35:49,447
Ah, just relax.

1372
01:35:49,448 --> 01:35:51,537
I can get another one.

1373
01:35:52,887 --> 01:35:55,149
How else are you gonna remember me, anyway?

1374
01:35:55,150 --> 01:35:57,935
<i>Come on, Brian.
Let's go.</i>

1375
01:36:04,899 --> 01:36:07,205
Bye, Maurice.

1376
01:36:27,878 --> 01:36:32,230
Remember, where there's a bed,
there's a way.

1377
01:36:34,842 --> 01:36:36,887
Come on, buddy.

1378
01:36:45,591 --> 01:36:48,506
Yeah!

1379
01:36:51,859 --> 01:36:53,729
Come on, let's go!

1380
01:37:10,878 --> 01:37:12,574
<i>- Come on!
- Come on, Brian!</i>

1381
01:37:14,838 --> 01:37:19,015
<i>Let's go.</i>

1382
01:37:25,805 --> 01:37:27,545
Yeah!

1383
01:37:29,679 --> 01:37:31,724
Yeah!

1384
01:37:49,481 --> 01:37:52,179
- Hello?
- Mom, I've got Eric.

1385
01:37:52,180 --> 01:37:54,094
- Oh, it's Brian.
- It's Brian.

1386
01:37:54,095 --> 01:37:55,747
- He found Eric.
- Are they all right?

1387
01:37:55,748 --> 01:37:57,445
- Are you all right?
- <i>Yeah, we're fine.</i>

1388
01:37:57,446 --> 01:37:59,273
- Oh, they're all right.
- Thank God.

1389
01:37:59,274 --> 01:38:01,666
- Hey, tell 'em I'm here.
- Look, Dad's here.

1390
01:38:01,667 --> 01:38:03,538
<i>Stay right where you are.
We'll come and pick you up.</i>

1391
01:38:03,539 --> 01:38:05,279
- Where are they?
- Where are you?

1392
01:38:05,280 --> 01:38:07,759
- Malibu.
- They're in Malibu.

1393
01:38:07,760 --> 01:38:09,500
- Malibu?
- Massachusetts?

1394
01:38:09,501 --> 01:38:10,937
- Where the hell's that?
- Where the hell is that?

1395
01:38:10,938 --> 01:38:14,549
- California.
- California.

1396
01:38:14,550 --> 01:38:16,290
California?
How the hell'd they get there?

1397
01:38:16,291 --> 01:38:17,682
What on earth are you doing there?

1398
01:38:17,683 --> 01:38:21,817
Um, it's kind of a long story.