1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162
WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

1
00:00:05,794 --> 00:00:09,431
Oh, those are beautiful pastries.

2
00:00:09,531 --> 00:00:11,309
Yeah, right? I got them
from this amazing bakery

3
00:00:11,333 --> 00:00:12,701
on Abbot Kinney.

4
00:00:12,801 --> 00:00:15,704
I thought this was a cream puff,
but it's got meat in it.

5
00:00:15,804 --> 00:00:19,208
You know how you get your mouth
all ready for something sweet,

6
00:00:19,341 --> 00:00:21,576
and suddenly there's ham?

7
00:00:22,811 --> 00:00:26,115
I don't like mouth surprises.

8
00:00:26,981 --> 00:00:28,483
(WOOD CREAKING)

9
00:00:28,550 --> 00:00:31,253
Malcolm, is that your floor
making that sound?

10
00:00:31,386 --> 00:00:33,388
Uh, yeah, mine's got a few quirks.

11
00:00:33,488 --> 00:00:35,424
(WOOD CREAKING)

12
00:00:37,892 --> 00:00:40,662
Son, your floor shouldn't be mushy.

13
00:00:40,762 --> 00:00:43,832
It's fine. It's just a old house, Pop.

14
00:00:43,932 --> 00:00:44,933
Whoa, Marty, no!

15
00:00:45,066 --> 00:00:47,068
What? What?

16
00:00:47,169 --> 00:00:49,204
You cannot go near the fireplace.

17
00:00:49,271 --> 00:00:50,271
What's wrong?

18
00:00:50,339 --> 00:00:51,773
There's a gap in the floor

19
00:00:51,873 --> 00:00:53,108
right where you're standing.

20
00:00:53,208 --> 00:00:55,510
- A gap?
- It's a small gap.

21
00:00:55,577 --> 00:00:57,646
- But do not move.
- What...

22
00:00:57,746 --> 00:00:59,026
Look, I had to put a rug over it

23
00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:00,615
'cause I didn't want Mama to see it.

24
00:01:00,715 --> 00:01:03,718
So you rather your mother
watch her son fall to his death?

25
00:01:03,785 --> 00:01:04,918
CALVIN: Okay, babe,

26
00:01:05,019 --> 00:01:07,189
it's one foot down and just sand.

27
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Yeah. (LAUGHS)

28
00:01:08,657 --> 00:01:10,625
Well, it's not just sand.
(CLEARS THROAT)

29
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It's a family of crabs under there.

30
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Crabs?!

31
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- Daddy, please...
- You-you gonna be okay, son.

32
00:01:15,797 --> 00:01:17,132
You gonna be all right.

33
00:01:17,232 --> 00:01:18,776
- You can do this.
- Mar-Marty, look at me, okay?

34
00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:20,369
Step towards the plant.

35
00:01:20,435 --> 00:01:21,803
- Come on.
- (WOOD CREAKS)

36
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Step to the edge of the rug.

37
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Okay, now jump.

38
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There you go. See? Yay.

39
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Get off me. Get off me.

40
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See? Look, we all good.

41
00:01:33,582 --> 00:01:35,384
We are not all good.

42
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When people come to visit,
they shouldn't have to

43
00:01:37,152 --> 00:01:40,722
be a American Ninja Warrior
to go to the bathroom.

44
00:01:41,890 --> 00:01:43,592
You know what? You need new floors.

45
00:01:43,691 --> 00:01:46,161
Oh, no, no, I can't afford
new floors right now.

46
00:01:46,295 --> 00:01:47,896
Well, can you afford a lawsuit?

47
00:01:47,996 --> 00:01:50,199
Oh, please, Marty is not gonna sue me.

48
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- I would sue you so fast!
- TINA: See?

49
00:01:51,966 --> 00:01:54,369
Uh, uh, no-nobody's suing nobody.

50
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Listen.

51
00:01:56,671 --> 00:01:57,905
We'll get you new floors.

52
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It'll-it'll be our housewarming gift.

53
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- Yeah.
- Whoa, no, no, look, look. Thanks, y'all.

54
00:02:01,943 --> 00:02:03,612
But-but new floors? That's a fortune.

55
00:02:03,712 --> 00:02:05,079
Eh, not necessarily.

56
00:02:05,146 --> 00:02:07,081
You know what? I'm gonna
call my cousin Crutch.

57
00:02:07,148 --> 00:02:09,583
Oh, Crutch?
That's the one who always has

58
00:02:09,684 --> 00:02:11,186
his shirt off in the Christmas cards?

59
00:02:12,287 --> 00:02:14,856
Yeah, I don't even open
the envelope anymore.

60
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We haven't seen Crutch in years.

61
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Look, the point is is that he owns

62
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a flooring company in New York.

63
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I'm sure he can get us
the materials wholesale.

64
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- Oh.
- Okay.

65
00:02:26,668 --> 00:02:27,969
I'll just call him right here.

66
00:02:28,036 --> 00:02:29,070
(FACETIME RINGS)

67
00:02:29,170 --> 00:02:31,039
CRUTCH: What up, cuz?

68
00:02:31,139 --> 00:02:33,742
Okay, C-Crutch, could-could you
put a shirt on, please?

69
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You called me during my naked time.

70
00:02:37,177 --> 00:02:39,948
Eh... Oh... Okay, Crutch, listen.

71
00:02:40,048 --> 00:02:43,585
Hey, my son Malcolm
just bought a house, and, uh,

72
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he needs new floors, so...

73
00:02:45,354 --> 00:02:47,289
we thought maybe you could hook us up.

74
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Of course, cuzzo. I got you.

75
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Well, all right.

76
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I can't believe Malcolm
is old enough to buy a house.

77
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It feels just like yesterday
you was wearing pull-ups

78
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and eating glue.

79
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Y'all let me eat glue?

80
00:03:02,036 --> 00:03:05,206
Me? No. Your father
let Crutch watch you.

81
00:03:05,307 --> 00:03:07,376
You kept trying to open up
your little mouth.

82
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It was adorable.

83
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CALVIN (LAUGHS): Okay, well,

84
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a-all right, all right, cuz,
thank you so much, man.

85
00:03:12,981 --> 00:03:14,983
We appreciate the help, though.
Thank you.

86
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Look, don't mention it.
As soon as I place the order,

87
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I'll get on a plane.

88
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CALVIN: A plane?

89
00:03:20,255 --> 00:03:22,190
What... Why-why you
getting on a plane?

90
00:03:22,291 --> 00:03:23,858
It's a long drive from New York.

91
00:03:23,925 --> 00:03:25,560
You know I got banned from Amtrak.

92
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They don't joke around
with them quiet cars.

93
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(CALVIN LAUGHS, STAMMERS)

94
00:03:30,632 --> 00:03:32,042
You know, uh, Crutch, there's no need

95
00:03:32,066 --> 00:03:33,478
for you to travel
all the way out here.

96
00:03:33,502 --> 00:03:35,212
We just, you know,
we thought you could just

97
00:03:35,236 --> 00:03:36,638
kind of help us with the materials.

98
00:03:36,737 --> 00:03:38,340
- That's...
- Hold on for a minute.

99
00:03:38,407 --> 00:03:41,676
You want the Crutch discount
without the Crutch?

100
00:03:41,743 --> 00:03:43,211
No. No, no, man, we want the Crutch.

101
00:03:43,312 --> 00:03:45,547
You know we want the Crutch.
We love the Crutch.

102
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MALCOLM: Yeah, we want
the Crutch. Hey, hey, hey.

103
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Hey, hey, thank you, Cousin Crutch.

104
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No problem, Sticky Lips.

105
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♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪

106
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♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪

107
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Hey! Sorry I'm late.
I'll get dinner started.

108
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Already taken care of.

109
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Wow!

110
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I'm sorry you lost your job,

111
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but coming home to a home-cooked
meal is pretty great.

112
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I love having all this free time.

113
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You know, just today

114
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I uploaded all of Grover's
baby photos onto the cloud,

115
00:04:19,514 --> 00:04:24,919
I marked all 761
of your unread emails as read,

116
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and I finally canceled
that gym membership

117
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we still had in Michigan.

118
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Huh. How can I repay you?

119
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I can think of a few ways.

120
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Mmm.

121
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Can you not?

122
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- Why do you hate love?
- We barely touched!

123
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I-I'm sorry. I'm just wiped out.

124
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It feels like I've
been silk-screening T-shirts

125
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- for hours.
- Ooh, let me see that.

126
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What have we got here?

127
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"Capy time, vibing hard"?

128
00:04:50,845 --> 00:04:52,122
Did you mean for it to say that?

129
00:04:52,146 --> 00:04:53,815
Okay, boomer.

130
00:04:55,016 --> 00:04:56,951
'Scuse me. I-I am not a boomer.

131
00:04:57,085 --> 00:04:58,753
Tom Brokaw is a boomer.

132
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I don't know your friends, Dad.

133
00:05:00,455 --> 00:05:02,056
(SPUTTERS)

134
00:05:02,791 --> 00:05:05,527
I guess we're just confused
about this shirt.

135
00:05:05,627 --> 00:05:07,061
Well, you're the only one,

136
00:05:07,128 --> 00:05:08,797
because everybody in my class
loves them.

137
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I've already sold a bunch.

138
00:05:10,331 --> 00:05:11,466
Oh.

139
00:05:11,566 --> 00:05:13,110
Looks like we have
a budding entrepreneur

140
00:05:13,134 --> 00:05:14,302
- in our house.
- Mm.

141
00:05:14,403 --> 00:05:16,083
Yeah. I-I just don't know
how I'm gonna get

142
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all these T-shirts made
and my homework done.

143
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You're in luck, buddy.

144
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I have all this time.

145
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Please, take advantage. Use me.

146
00:05:23,545 --> 00:05:24,946
- R-Really?
- Yeah.

147
00:05:25,046 --> 00:05:26,415
That'd be great, Dad.

148
00:05:26,515 --> 00:05:27,982
But, uh, at your age,

149
00:05:28,082 --> 00:05:29,259
are you sure you have the energy?

150
00:05:29,283 --> 00:05:30,852
- At my age?
- GEMMA: Uh...

151
00:05:30,952 --> 00:05:34,288
I have got to teach you
how to quit while you're ahead.

152
00:05:36,825 --> 00:05:38,603
Morning, babe.
I don't know what you're doing,

153
00:05:38,627 --> 00:05:41,329
but this turkey bacon
smells like real bacon.

154
00:05:41,430 --> 00:05:43,197
Oh. Yeah, you're smelling my bacon,

155
00:05:43,297 --> 00:05:45,366
because my cholesterol is great.

156
00:05:46,435 --> 00:05:47,702
Oh.

157
00:05:47,802 --> 00:05:49,738
Well, can I rub my bacon
on your bacon?

158
00:05:49,838 --> 00:05:51,706
- Ew.
- (KNOCKING)

159
00:05:51,805 --> 00:05:53,362
Don't be nasty.

160
00:05:53,386 --> 00:05:55,090
Ain't nobody being nasty.
I'm talking about bacon.

161
00:05:55,091 --> 00:05:56,220
- You're being nasty, you know you are.
- You... No, you were being...

162
00:05:56,244 --> 00:05:57,846
Hey, I'm talking
about breakfast, girl.

163
00:05:57,946 --> 00:06:00,248
- I wasn't even trying to do nothing.
- (CHUCKLING)

164
00:06:01,816 --> 00:06:04,185
- Hey!
- Cuz!

165
00:06:06,254 --> 00:06:08,723
Crutch, man!
Wh-What are you doing here?

166
00:06:08,857 --> 00:06:11,059
I told you I was coming.

167
00:06:11,159 --> 00:06:12,670
Yeah, but, uh, you know,
I thought you'd tell me

168
00:06:12,694 --> 00:06:13,928
when you were coming.

169
00:06:14,028 --> 00:06:15,673
You know you didn't have
to drop everything.

170
00:06:15,697 --> 00:06:16,798
Drop what?

171
00:06:16,865 --> 00:06:18,385
My wife Jeanette been gone five years,

172
00:06:18,467 --> 00:06:19,468
God rest her soul.

173
00:06:19,534 --> 00:06:21,002
Kids are out of the house.

174
00:06:21,069 --> 00:06:22,704
I'm all yours.

175
00:06:22,804 --> 00:06:24,305
- Well...
- Oh, there she is!

176
00:06:24,372 --> 00:06:26,541
- Bring it in, sis! Whoo!
- Hey! How you doing?

177
00:06:26,641 --> 00:06:28,376
Ooh, you smell like bacon.

178
00:06:28,510 --> 00:06:30,211
- Oh.
- Oh, it ain't you.

179
00:06:30,311 --> 00:06:31,345
There is bacon.

180
00:06:31,412 --> 00:06:32,614
Oh.

181
00:06:33,381 --> 00:06:35,016
I'm starving. Do you mind?

182
00:06:35,116 --> 00:06:36,951
No, no, go ahead. Help yourself.

183
00:06:37,051 --> 00:06:38,352
- Mmm.
- You already have it

184
00:06:38,453 --> 00:06:40,755
in your unwashed
airplane hands anyway.

185
00:06:41,656 --> 00:06:43,257
Hmm.

186
00:06:43,391 --> 00:06:44,959
You know, every time I see him,

187
00:06:45,059 --> 00:06:46,394
I can't help but think about

188
00:06:46,495 --> 00:06:48,038
how much he looks like
your brother Curtis.

189
00:06:48,062 --> 00:06:49,063
Really?

190
00:06:49,088 --> 00:06:50,130
Yeah.

191
00:06:50,164 --> 00:06:51,600
I don't see it.

192
00:06:53,267 --> 00:06:55,336
These bacons is good.

193
00:06:55,403 --> 00:06:58,272
I can't wait to soak up
some of this L.A. sun,

194
00:06:58,406 --> 00:06:59,641
meet some celebrities.

195
00:06:59,741 --> 00:07:01,209
Oh, before I forget,

196
00:07:01,275 --> 00:07:03,878
here's the receipt
to my airplane ticket.

197
00:07:04,846 --> 00:07:06,848
Oh, I'm-I'm paying for your flight?

198
00:07:06,915 --> 00:07:09,584
Yeah, I'm supposed to pay
to come fix your floors?

199
00:07:11,285 --> 00:07:12,854
Crutch, this is a lot.

200
00:07:12,921 --> 00:07:14,188
Well, it's a business trip.

201
00:07:14,288 --> 00:07:15,857
That's why I flew business class.

202
00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:17,191
It's in the name.

203
00:07:18,727 --> 00:07:19,794
Where's the commode?

204
00:07:19,819 --> 00:07:20,821
- That way.
- Yeah.

205
00:07:20,929 --> 00:07:22,631
- Right here?
- Yeah.

206
00:07:24,332 --> 00:07:26,668
- Really, Calvin? Really?
- I know, I know.

207
00:07:26,768 --> 00:07:28,436
I know, I know, babe. But, you know,

208
00:07:28,570 --> 00:07:31,239
just think about all the money
we'll save on Malcolm's floors.

209
00:07:31,339 --> 00:07:32,650
- Mm.
- And just think about it...

210
00:07:32,674 --> 00:07:34,509
I get to hang out
with my favorite cousin.

211
00:07:34,609 --> 00:07:36,277
You know, back in New York, man,

212
00:07:36,410 --> 00:07:39,313
we would spend summers there.
It'd be such a good time.

213
00:07:39,413 --> 00:07:41,816
And I remember he was just a...
And it was a...

214
00:07:42,617 --> 00:07:43,818
(KNOCKING)

215
00:07:44,619 --> 00:07:45,920
- Ooh, good morning!
- TINA: Oh.

216
00:07:45,987 --> 00:07:47,689
Tina, I'm bringing back
your Crock-Pot.

217
00:07:47,789 --> 00:07:50,959
Just another way I'm using
my free time to help Gemma.

218
00:07:51,059 --> 00:07:52,126
Oh. Well...

219
00:07:52,226 --> 00:07:53,461
Ooh. Are your hands blue?

220
00:07:53,562 --> 00:07:54,929
Oh, yeah.

221
00:07:54,996 --> 00:07:57,430
I'm also helping Grover
silk-screen some T-shirts.

222
00:07:58,232 --> 00:08:01,202
Oh, man.
Them little soaps are whimsical.

223
00:08:02,336 --> 00:08:04,739
Uh, Crutch,
this is my good friend Dave.

224
00:08:04,806 --> 00:08:08,342
Oh, this man right here
needs no introduction.

225
00:08:09,143 --> 00:08:10,945
Calvin, have you been talking me up?

226
00:08:11,012 --> 00:08:12,847
David Schwimmer.

227
00:08:13,982 --> 00:08:15,183
What?

228
00:08:15,316 --> 00:08:17,619
Why didn't you tell me you was friends

229
00:08:17,719 --> 00:08:18,753
with a Friend?

230
00:08:18,853 --> 00:08:20,622
Oh, no. Sir, no, no, no, no, no.

231
00:08:20,689 --> 00:08:21,856
That's not... It's not...

232
00:08:21,990 --> 00:08:23,324
- I'm not... - Da-David.
- Dave.

233
00:08:23,457 --> 00:08:25,297
- Don't bother.
- Just go with it. It's better.

234
00:08:26,828 --> 00:08:29,631
See how these boards are all warped?

235
00:08:29,698 --> 00:08:31,933
- Yeah.
- That's from salt air.

236
00:08:32,032 --> 00:08:35,303
Your house is too close
to the big ocean.

237
00:08:36,971 --> 00:08:38,607
Well, Crutch, it's a beach house.

238
00:08:38,707 --> 00:08:40,440
That's actually considered a positive.

239
00:08:40,507 --> 00:08:41,642
Go figure.

240
00:08:41,743 --> 00:08:42,911
California.

241
00:08:44,512 --> 00:08:48,116
Anyway, I ordered you
some oak wood flooring.

242
00:08:48,182 --> 00:08:49,584
But now?

243
00:08:49,684 --> 00:08:52,420
I think that you might want
some engineered hardwood.

244
00:08:52,520 --> 00:08:54,531
But don't worry about it...
I'll get it for you at cost.

245
00:08:54,555 --> 00:08:56,825
- Okay, well, that's good, right?
- But it might take

246
00:08:56,891 --> 00:08:58,693
a day or two
to arrive from the warehouse.

247
00:08:58,827 --> 00:09:00,194
But don't worry.

248
00:09:00,328 --> 00:09:02,030
I have someplace to stay,

249
00:09:02,130 --> 00:09:04,432
and I'll have time
to go see the big donut

250
00:09:04,532 --> 00:09:07,035
and the place where Whoopi
Goldberg put her dreadlocks

251
00:09:07,135 --> 00:09:08,436
in the cement.

252
00:09:10,071 --> 00:09:12,974
Okay. Well, uh, now
that my floors are all torn up,

253
00:09:13,041 --> 00:09:14,976
- I guess I need a place to stay, too.
- Mm.

254
00:09:15,043 --> 00:09:18,012
Well, you're welcome to bunk
with me at your pop's house.

255
00:09:19,714 --> 00:09:22,283
Uh, you should know that he
likes to sleep in the nude.

256
00:09:22,383 --> 00:09:25,219
And go to the kitchen that way, too.

257
00:09:27,889 --> 00:09:29,423
- Hey, Dad.
- (CHUCKLES): Hey!

258
00:09:29,523 --> 00:09:30,925
- Are you taking a break?
- No.

259
00:09:31,059 --> 00:09:32,961
Actually, I've already done
seven this morning.

260
00:09:33,061 --> 00:09:34,061
Oh, that's great,

261
00:09:34,162 --> 00:09:35,630
'cause I just got an order for 24.

262
00:09:35,730 --> 00:09:37,365
Ooh, that's exciting, buddy.

263
00:09:37,465 --> 00:09:39,500
Yeah. Um...

264
00:09:41,375 --> 00:09:42,378
Hey, is...

265
00:09:42,403 --> 00:09:44,438
is this one, uh, for practice?

266
00:09:45,406 --> 00:09:46,975
There something wrong with it?

267
00:09:48,176 --> 00:09:49,878
No, uh... it's fine.

268
00:09:49,978 --> 00:09:51,498
Like, I can tell you were tired, so...

269
00:09:51,579 --> 00:09:53,915
What? Okay, you know,
look, I-I can redo it.

270
00:09:54,048 --> 00:09:56,084
Oh, could you?
That'd be great. Thank you.

271
00:09:56,217 --> 00:09:57,551
Uh, that one, too.

272
00:09:58,319 --> 00:10:00,321
Hey, Dave.
While you're at the drugstore,

273
00:10:00,421 --> 00:10:01,923
I need you to get me some concealer.

274
00:10:02,056 --> 00:10:04,096
Well, I'm gonna need
a little more detail than that.

275
00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:05,645
You know what kind of concealer I use.

276
00:10:05,694 --> 00:10:09,197
I'm only vaguely aware
of the concept of concealer.

277
00:10:09,297 --> 00:10:11,800
Just get my old one
out of the cabinet.

278
00:10:11,933 --> 00:10:13,134
Come on, Grover. We got to go.

279
00:10:13,159 --> 00:10:14,167
Love you. Bye.

280
00:10:14,268 --> 00:10:15,336
This one, too.

281
00:10:19,674 --> 00:10:22,276
Crutch, were you up early watching TV?

282
00:10:22,410 --> 00:10:23,544
Yeah.

283
00:10:23,644 --> 00:10:25,780
I'm on East Coast time.

284
00:10:26,948 --> 00:10:29,684
Well, what was so funny
at 4:00 in the morning?

285
00:10:29,784 --> 00:10:32,453
Your boy David Schwimmer on Friends.

286
00:10:34,088 --> 00:10:35,423
He look different.

287
00:10:35,523 --> 00:10:37,325
I think he had work done.

288
00:10:38,659 --> 00:10:39,961
Oh, my goodness.

289
00:10:40,061 --> 00:10:42,130
What the hell, Calvin?
It's freezing in here.

290
00:10:42,230 --> 00:10:44,498
The thermostat's at 62 degrees.

291
00:10:44,598 --> 00:10:46,400
I'm a hot sleeper.

292
00:10:48,269 --> 00:10:51,572
You know something? You two
have been so gracious to me.

293
00:10:51,672 --> 00:10:53,117
How about letting me
make you breakfast?

294
00:10:53,141 --> 00:10:55,777
Who wants some of my famous waffles?

295
00:10:55,877 --> 00:10:57,245
- Oh...
- Oh, okay. Well, that's

296
00:10:57,345 --> 00:10:58,847
nice of you, Crutch. Thank you.

297
00:10:58,980 --> 00:11:00,448
It's the least I can do.

298
00:11:00,548 --> 00:11:02,183
- Oh.
- Yes.

299
00:11:02,316 --> 00:11:05,119
- Oh, babe, I remember when we were kids.
- Mm.

300
00:11:05,219 --> 00:11:07,856
- Crutch's waffles... fantastic.
- (TRUCK BACKUP ALARM BEEPING)

301
00:11:07,881 --> 00:11:08,898
Ooh, okay.

302
00:11:08,923 --> 00:11:10,324
(BRAKES HISSING)

303
00:11:10,424 --> 00:11:11,726
Oh.

304
00:11:12,493 --> 00:11:14,362
Yeah, it's, uh, the delivery truck.

305
00:11:14,495 --> 00:11:16,064
I think the engineered wood is here.

306
00:11:16,164 --> 00:11:18,399
Oh, hallelujah.

307
00:11:19,233 --> 00:11:21,102
Where's your toaster?

308
00:11:27,809 --> 00:11:30,511
You know, I don't think
all this stuff is gonna fit.

309
00:11:30,611 --> 00:11:31,679
That's okay.

310
00:11:31,813 --> 00:11:33,347
We can make another trip.

311
00:11:33,481 --> 00:11:34,715
Maybe tomorrow.

312
00:11:34,849 --> 00:11:35,850
Oh, hell no.

313
00:11:35,950 --> 00:11:37,485
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!

314
00:11:37,551 --> 00:11:38,719
No!

315
00:11:38,853 --> 00:11:40,955
No, let's get this done today. I mean,

316
00:11:41,055 --> 00:11:44,392
let's just load up
my beautiful Subaru Solterra.

317
00:11:44,525 --> 00:11:47,161
Look, she got all kinds of room.
S-See?

318
00:11:47,261 --> 00:11:50,298
Huh. I never pictured you
driving a EV.

319
00:11:50,364 --> 00:11:51,866
What is that supposed to mean?

320
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:53,567
Electric vehicle.

321
00:11:55,476 --> 00:11:56,479
Calvin?

322
00:11:56,504 --> 00:11:57,972
All right, all right, all right.

323
00:11:58,072 --> 00:11:59,473
Come on, let's just load it up.

324
00:11:59,540 --> 00:12:01,209
Yeah, I don't know.

325
00:12:01,309 --> 00:12:03,577
You sure this car can make it
all the way to the beach?

326
00:12:03,711 --> 00:12:04,712
Are you kidding me?

327
00:12:04,846 --> 00:12:06,114
With the range on this baby,

328
00:12:06,214 --> 00:12:08,682
I could drive all the way to Mexico.

329
00:12:08,749 --> 00:12:10,551
We should go to Cancún.

330
00:12:11,719 --> 00:12:13,021
Do floors tomorrow.

331
00:12:13,087 --> 00:12:15,723
No. O-Okay, o-okay,
how-how about this?

332
00:12:15,857 --> 00:12:17,458
You do the floors today

333
00:12:17,558 --> 00:12:20,594
and then I take you
to Roscoe's in East L.A.

334
00:12:20,694 --> 00:12:23,397
You won't know the difference. Okay?

335
00:12:23,497 --> 00:12:24,732
- Deal.
- Okay. (CHUCKLES)

336
00:12:24,866 --> 00:12:27,235
Even though they waffles
ain't as good as mine.

337
00:12:30,671 --> 00:12:32,073
CRUTCH: Ah!

338
00:12:32,173 --> 00:12:34,342
This is the life.

339
00:12:35,944 --> 00:12:38,679
How many fish you think are in there?

340
00:12:40,081 --> 00:12:42,851
I don't know, Crutch.
It's the Pacific Ocean.

341
00:12:43,617 --> 00:12:45,519
How about you come in here and help us

342
00:12:45,586 --> 00:12:47,555
- and we can count fish later?
- Yeah.

343
00:12:48,356 --> 00:12:49,958
Malcolm, you owe me for this.

344
00:12:50,091 --> 00:12:52,360
I am not built for manual labor. Ow!

345
00:12:52,460 --> 00:12:53,594
See? Splinter.

346
00:12:54,195 --> 00:12:55,763
- Ow!
- CALVIN: Okay, okay.

347
00:12:56,564 --> 00:12:58,232
I'm gonna say two million.

348
00:13:02,036 --> 00:13:03,637
(SIGHS, SPUTTERS)

349
00:13:07,041 --> 00:13:09,443
I see what you were trying to do.

350
00:13:10,778 --> 00:13:11,946
So you don't like 'em?

351
00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:13,414
They're getting better.

352
00:13:13,481 --> 00:13:15,083
It's just...

353
00:13:15,149 --> 00:13:16,550
(SIGHS) When people buy a Grover,

354
00:13:16,650 --> 00:13:19,320
they expect
a certain level of quality.

355
00:13:20,154 --> 00:13:22,556
Okay. Grover,
I'm doing the best I can.

356
00:13:22,656 --> 00:13:24,368
I mean, look at my hands.
They're all cramped up.

357
00:13:24,392 --> 00:13:25,793
They look like blue claws.

358
00:13:25,894 --> 00:13:27,561
I mean, I get it. I get it.

359
00:13:27,661 --> 00:13:29,497
It's just... (SIGHS)

360
00:13:29,630 --> 00:13:31,665
These new orders are from juniors.

361
00:13:31,799 --> 00:13:35,503
Okay? So it's one thing to sell
subpar shirts to freshmen,

362
00:13:35,603 --> 00:13:37,138
but this...

363
00:13:37,238 --> 00:13:38,439
whatever this is,

364
00:13:38,506 --> 00:13:40,708
it's-it's not gonna fly
with the juniors.

365
00:13:43,344 --> 00:13:45,246
Hmm.

366
00:13:46,047 --> 00:13:47,515
Oh. Let me guess...

367
00:13:47,648 --> 00:13:49,117
the concealer's wrong.

368
00:13:49,183 --> 00:13:50,518
Well, it's just the color.

369
00:13:50,651 --> 00:13:51,953
This is frosted linen.

370
00:13:52,053 --> 00:13:53,854
I use almond pearl.

371
00:13:55,623 --> 00:13:58,292
They looked exactly the same.

372
00:13:58,392 --> 00:14:00,128
I have peach undertones.

373
00:14:00,228 --> 00:14:02,997
(SCOFFS) But it's okay.

374
00:14:03,097 --> 00:14:04,798
It's okay. You didn't know.

375
00:14:04,899 --> 00:14:05,934
(CHUCKLES)

376
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:08,669
Well, I can only do so much.

377
00:14:08,769 --> 00:14:11,305
Okay, this one's
definitely a freshman shirt.

378
00:14:13,207 --> 00:14:14,542
Oh, God.

379
00:14:14,675 --> 00:14:16,210
Oh. What now?

380
00:14:16,344 --> 00:14:19,513
It's fine. It's just I asked you
for a shampoo and conditioner,

381
00:14:19,647 --> 00:14:21,715
and you got me shampoo-conditioner.

382
00:14:22,516 --> 00:14:23,884
What am I missing?

383
00:14:23,985 --> 00:14:25,653
The "and."

384
00:14:28,122 --> 00:14:32,460
I'm sorry that your husband
is not Vidal Sassoon.

385
00:14:33,627 --> 00:14:35,329
Is that another one
of your boomer friends?

386
00:14:35,429 --> 00:14:37,531
I am an elder millennial!

387
00:14:37,665 --> 00:14:40,001
And you are taking advantage
of my generosity.

388
00:14:40,068 --> 00:14:41,535
But no more!

389
00:14:44,705 --> 00:14:46,040
(DOOR OPENS)

390
00:14:46,140 --> 00:14:48,943
I did not mean
to slam the door that hard.

391
00:14:49,043 --> 00:14:51,745
But I am still quite upset.

392
00:14:58,619 --> 00:15:02,156
It's like whatever I do
for them, it's never enough.

393
00:15:02,256 --> 00:15:03,291
Get the dry cleaning.

394
00:15:03,357 --> 00:15:04,892
Make these T-shirts.

395
00:15:04,993 --> 00:15:07,595
Become a shampoo expert.

396
00:15:08,796 --> 00:15:10,198
So you ran away from home?

397
00:15:10,331 --> 00:15:11,565
No, Tina.

398
00:15:11,699 --> 00:15:13,667
Running away from home
is for children.

399
00:15:13,767 --> 00:15:15,203
I stormed out.

400
00:15:15,303 --> 00:15:16,504
Like a man.

401
00:15:17,871 --> 00:15:19,540
Ah, ah! Don't move.

402
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:20,841
This area is still wet.

403
00:15:20,908 --> 00:15:23,411
Man, I tell you,
these floors are solid.

404
00:15:23,544 --> 00:15:25,346
Ain't no crabs getting in here.

405
00:15:25,413 --> 00:15:26,747
Great.

406
00:15:26,847 --> 00:15:28,316
Malcolm, you owe me a mani-pedi.

407
00:15:28,416 --> 00:15:30,618
What? Why am I getting your toes done?

408
00:15:30,718 --> 00:15:32,486
It's cheaper to do the set.

409
00:15:33,554 --> 00:15:36,924
Once all that sealant dries, Malcolm,

410
00:15:37,025 --> 00:15:39,160
you'll be able to Cha-Cha Slide
on these floors, man.

411
00:15:39,227 --> 00:15:41,529
- Hey!
- Oh, yes!

412
00:15:41,629 --> 00:15:43,531
And look at the time!

413
00:15:43,631 --> 00:15:44,865
Crutch, you are in luck.

414
00:15:44,965 --> 00:15:46,534
You could be able to catch
your red-eye.

415
00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:48,102
- Oh.
- Yeah.

416
00:15:48,236 --> 00:15:49,537
Flag on the play, guys.

417
00:15:49,637 --> 00:15:51,639
What-what-what flag? What flag?

418
00:15:52,440 --> 00:15:53,807
This ain't gonna work.

419
00:15:53,907 --> 00:15:56,410
- Why?
- The sealant was for the original wood.

420
00:15:57,411 --> 00:15:58,446
Look at the streaks.

421
00:15:58,579 --> 00:15:59,819
What streaks? Uh, what streaks?

422
00:15:59,847 --> 00:16:02,450
I don't see no streaks. What?

423
00:16:02,583 --> 00:16:05,286
You can't see,
because when it come to floors,

424
00:16:05,419 --> 00:16:07,421
you don't have the professional eye.

425
00:16:07,521 --> 00:16:09,923
But that's okay.
It's gonna take a few days.

426
00:16:10,924 --> 00:16:13,361
I'm just glad I'm getting used
to your hard bed.

427
00:16:14,428 --> 00:16:16,130
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait.

428
00:16:16,264 --> 00:16:17,565
You staying?

429
00:16:17,631 --> 00:16:19,100
- He's staying?
- Okay.

430
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:21,835
All right. Let-let-let me
just talk to him.

431
00:16:21,935 --> 00:16:24,405
- Crutch, what's going on, man?
- Get on that.

432
00:16:24,505 --> 00:16:26,674
Nothing.
The floors, they just not right.

433
00:16:26,774 --> 00:16:28,642
Come on, these floors are beautiful.

434
00:16:28,742 --> 00:16:30,478
And-and when it comes to flooring,

435
00:16:30,611 --> 00:16:31,979
you don't make mistakes.

436
00:16:32,113 --> 00:16:33,447
Not on the East Coast.

437
00:16:33,547 --> 00:16:34,948
But due to the time change

438
00:16:35,049 --> 00:16:36,450
and your house being so hot...

439
00:16:36,550 --> 00:16:38,319
Oh. Oh, no, no, no.

440
00:16:38,452 --> 00:16:39,753
I know what this is.

441
00:16:39,820 --> 00:16:41,822
See, this is what you always do

442
00:16:41,955 --> 00:16:43,591
whenever you don't want
to do something.

443
00:16:43,657 --> 00:16:47,661
What? You crazy.

444
00:16:48,561 --> 00:16:49,930
Am I?

445
00:16:49,997 --> 00:16:52,042
I mean, you've been doing this
since we were kids, man.

446
00:16:52,066 --> 00:16:54,935
This reminds me... when you were
afraid to play tackle football

447
00:16:55,002 --> 00:16:59,039
and told your daddy
you had geriatric arthritis.

448
00:17:00,408 --> 00:17:02,243
You were nine.

449
00:17:02,310 --> 00:17:03,611
Fine.

450
00:17:03,677 --> 00:17:05,245
- You got me.
- Okay.

451
00:17:05,346 --> 00:17:06,680
The truth is,

452
00:17:06,780 --> 00:17:08,182
been running from my problems,

453
00:17:08,282 --> 00:17:09,883
just like TV's Ross.

454
00:17:11,185 --> 00:17:14,053
You guys, again, I stormed out.

455
00:17:16,090 --> 00:17:18,091
Been married so long.

456
00:17:18,192 --> 00:17:20,328
When Jeanette passed,

457
00:17:20,461 --> 00:17:21,962
just got lonely.

458
00:17:22,029 --> 00:17:23,864
(CLICKS TONGUE) Aw, Crutch.

459
00:17:23,997 --> 00:17:25,533
I'm sorry.

460
00:17:25,633 --> 00:17:27,701
I mean, well, what about your kids?

461
00:17:27,801 --> 00:17:29,570
My daughter's in Minnesota.

462
00:17:29,670 --> 00:17:31,405
My son's off in law school.

463
00:17:32,440 --> 00:17:34,808
We don't have what you have here.

464
00:17:36,477 --> 00:17:38,546
I got used to being around family.

465
00:17:38,679 --> 00:17:41,048
Guess I was just trying
to make the feeling last.

466
00:17:41,182 --> 00:17:43,517
- Come on, man. We got you, cuz, man.
- We're your family.

467
00:17:43,651 --> 00:17:45,553
- You can always FaceTime us.
- Yeah.

468
00:17:45,653 --> 00:17:46,920
Yeah, man.

469
00:17:47,688 --> 00:17:48,728
So my floors are finished?

470
00:17:48,822 --> 00:17:50,624
Wrong with you?

471
00:17:51,531 --> 00:17:52,535
Um...

472
00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:54,128
we love you, cuz.

473
00:17:54,228 --> 00:17:55,729
- Yes.
- TINA: Yes.

474
00:17:55,863 --> 00:17:57,898
Crutch, you know what, take your time.

475
00:17:57,998 --> 00:17:59,967
- You can stay as long as you like.
- Yeah.

476
00:18:00,067 --> 00:18:01,469
Till Sunday.

477
00:18:03,497 --> 00:18:05,579
Okay, come on, y'all.
Let's get out of here.

478
00:18:05,603 --> 00:18:06,617
All right.

479
00:18:06,740 --> 00:18:09,477
No, no, no, no.
Not you, David Schwimmer.

480
00:18:09,543 --> 00:18:11,645
You have to wait
for that sealant to dry.

481
00:18:11,712 --> 00:18:13,247
How long is that gonna take?

482
00:18:13,381 --> 00:18:15,048
About two, three hours.

483
00:18:16,750 --> 00:18:18,295
All right, now, we gonna see you
at the house, Dave.

484
00:18:18,319 --> 00:18:19,887
Yeah, see you later.

485
00:18:24,392 --> 00:18:26,894
You know, your cousin Crutch
can be a handful,

486
00:18:26,994 --> 00:18:28,095
but I'm-a miss him.

487
00:18:28,229 --> 00:18:30,030
Yeah. You know, me, too.

488
00:18:30,097 --> 00:18:32,566
And he did save us a few bucks
on those new floors.

489
00:18:32,666 --> 00:18:36,003
I just don't know how he managed
to spend $300 at Roscoe's.

490
00:18:36,069 --> 00:18:37,471
(CHUCKLES) I do.

491
00:18:37,571 --> 00:18:40,007
This suitcase is full
of chicken and waffles.

492
00:18:40,107 --> 00:18:41,242
What?

493
00:18:43,744 --> 00:18:44,912
Hey, Dad.

494
00:18:45,012 --> 00:18:46,447
Um...

495
00:18:47,681 --> 00:18:51,619
Look, I-I really felt bad
when you ran away from home.

496
00:18:53,987 --> 00:18:57,057
Grover, I stormed out.

497
00:18:57,124 --> 00:18:58,826
That's not really how it came off.

498
00:18:58,926 --> 00:19:00,261
But...

499
00:19:00,394 --> 00:19:01,862
regardless, um,

500
00:19:01,929 --> 00:19:04,865
I'm sorry I rode you so hard
about the shirts.

501
00:19:04,965 --> 00:19:06,534
I was not a good boss.

502
00:19:06,634 --> 00:19:09,437
Son, you were not my boss.

503
00:19:10,604 --> 00:19:12,473
Well, not to worry,

504
00:19:12,573 --> 00:19:14,642
because I fixed my production issue.

505
00:19:14,742 --> 00:19:16,610
Um, I'm outsourcing my silk-screening

506
00:19:16,710 --> 00:19:20,013
to a bunch of eighth graders who
will do it for 50 cents a shirt.

507
00:19:21,249 --> 00:19:23,817
Grover, that's, like,
two dollars an hour.

508
00:19:23,917 --> 00:19:26,454
Yeah, that's why I didn't
go to the math kids.

509
00:19:30,791 --> 00:19:32,793
Dave, I just want you to know

510
00:19:32,893 --> 00:19:35,629
how much I appreciate
all you've been doing for us.

511
00:19:35,729 --> 00:19:36,997
And if I haven't said it...

512
00:19:37,130 --> 00:19:38,532
You haven't said it.

513
00:19:39,867 --> 00:19:41,269
Well, I just said it.

514
00:19:44,405 --> 00:19:45,806
Okay, well...

515
00:19:45,906 --> 00:19:46,907
I forgive you.

516
00:19:47,007 --> 00:19:49,009
- Aw.
- Can you not?

517
00:19:49,109 --> 00:19:52,613
- How do you think we made you?
- It's so normal.

518
00:19:52,680 --> 00:19:54,648
- Hey, hey, cuzzo!
- (CHUCKLES)

519
00:19:54,748 --> 00:19:55,949
You ready to go?

520
00:19:56,016 --> 00:19:57,017
- Yep.
- (CHUCKLES)

521
00:19:57,150 --> 00:19:58,819
Been fun, but I got to go home.

522
00:19:58,919 --> 00:20:00,588
- Aw.
- Need to feed my snake

523
00:20:00,688 --> 00:20:02,022
or I won't have a cat.

524
00:20:03,591 --> 00:20:05,192
Wow!

525
00:20:05,293 --> 00:20:07,160
Lisa Kudrow!

526
00:20:09,797 --> 00:20:11,632
You guys are friends in real life?

527
00:20:11,699 --> 00:20:13,567
- Just go with it.
- Oh.

528
00:20:15,002 --> 00:20:17,137
It's been great seeing you, Crutch.

529
00:20:17,204 --> 00:20:19,940
Yeah, you know, I hope it's
not so long till the next time.

530
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,276
Well, it doesn't have to be.
You know, my son Jake

531
00:20:22,343 --> 00:20:24,312
is graduating from law school.

532
00:20:24,412 --> 00:20:25,546
Y'all two should come.

533
00:20:25,679 --> 00:20:27,581
Oh, my God. To New York?

534
00:20:27,606 --> 00:20:28,616
Oh, yeah. I'm in.

535
00:20:28,682 --> 00:20:30,718
I mean, shopping, Broadway show,

536
00:20:30,851 --> 00:20:32,453
room service, shopping.

537
00:20:32,478 --> 00:20:33,496
- Well...
- Oh, my God.

538
00:20:33,521 --> 00:20:34,788
I mean, you know,

539
00:20:34,855 --> 00:20:35,932
I already spent a lot of money

540
00:20:35,956 --> 00:20:37,157
on these new floors, so...

541
00:20:37,257 --> 00:20:38,668
- Oh, come on.
- I mean, it's got to be

542
00:20:38,692 --> 00:20:40,461
the most expensive hookup
I've ever gotten.

543
00:20:40,561 --> 00:20:43,030
But Calvin, you keep saying
how important family is.

544
00:20:43,130 --> 00:20:44,131
Right, Crutch?

545
00:20:44,156 --> 00:20:45,165
Absolutely.

546
00:20:45,232 --> 00:20:46,300
Huh.

547
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:47,835
I'm gonna go book it right now.

548
00:20:47,901 --> 00:20:49,069
Ha!

549
00:20:50,203 --> 00:20:52,072
See what you did?

550
00:20:52,205 --> 00:20:53,374
You know what?

551
00:20:53,474 --> 00:20:55,142
I hope TSA confiscate every breast,

552
00:20:55,242 --> 00:20:56,777
thigh, and wing you got in there.

553
00:20:58,779 --> 00:21:04,979
sync and corrections awaqeded
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