1 00:00:02,627 --> 00:00:06,423 Okay, here we go. Time to meet the public. 2 00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:07,757 Hey, guys? 3 00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:11,219 Can I, um, read you some of my new novel? 4 00:00:11,219 --> 00:00:13,096 Of course! 5 00:00:11,302 --> 00:00:13,096 I love to give notes. 6 00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:14,139 I'm not doing anything. 7 00:00:14,139 --> 00:00:16,433 Awesome. Okay. 8 00:00:18,101 --> 00:00:19,144 Eons ago -- 9 00:00:19,144 --> 00:00:21,104 What the [bleep]?! This sucks! 10 00:00:21,104 --> 00:00:22,647 It makes me want to kill myself. 11 00:00:22,731 --> 00:00:26,067 You made me hate reading more than I already do! 12 00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:28,445 Wait, what? Is it really that bad? 13 00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:29,738 Let's kick him in the nuts! 14 00:00:34,909 --> 00:00:37,620 All: Bad writer! Bad writer! Bad writer! 15 00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:41,040 I deserve this. 16 00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:43,209 Go ahead. We wanna hear it. 17 00:00:43,293 --> 00:00:45,795 Uh, I don't know. 18 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,590 You know what? It's not ready yet! 19 00:00:50,008 --> 00:00:51,634 Oh! 20 00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:54,304 I got a papercut on my dong! 21 00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:09,986 Hey, Alex. How's the writing going? 22 00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:11,529 Terrible. 23 00:01:11,613 --> 00:01:13,990 I bet a lot of successful authors have felt this way. 24 00:01:13,990 --> 00:01:15,658 You should ask one for advice. 25 00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:16,993 Maybe email Dr. Seuss? 26 00:01:16,993 --> 00:01:19,496 Oh, buddy, he's 100 percent dead. 27 00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:22,207 No! Why didn't anybody tell me? 28 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:24,209 Oh, I went to Skylight Books to take a selfie 29 00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:26,377 in the poetry section, and they're doing a signing 30 00:01:26,461 --> 00:01:28,671 by that guy who writes that horny space stuff you love! 31 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:32,300 Jack Kleghorn? Author of Lust of the Star Wizards 1-4: 32 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:34,010 The Unfinished Pentology? 33 00:01:34,010 --> 00:01:36,679 Yeah, that sounds the right amount of gross. 34 00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:38,348 He's my favorite writer! 35 00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:40,809 If he's your Seuss, go talk to him. 36 00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:42,143 Before it's too late. 37 00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:53,530 I say! Looks like we've got ourselves a bit of a Kleghead. 38 00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:56,950 Oh, you have no idea, Mr. Kleghorn. 39 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,953 Please, call me "Sir Jack." 40 00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:03,039 Thank you so much, Mr. Kleg-- um, I'm sorry, Sir Jack. 41 00:02:03,039 --> 00:02:06,709 I'm actually a bit of a writer, too. 42 00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:07,752 Really? 43 00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:10,213 I mostly write erotic sci-fi epics 44 00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:13,174 about cyborg Vikings fighting evil space gods. 45 00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:14,384 Do you now? 46 00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:16,636 I actually just finished a novel, but -- 47 00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:18,888 Finished the novel, you say? 48 00:02:18,972 --> 00:02:21,641 Yeah, but I'm too scared to let anyone read it. 49 00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:23,393 Did you ever feel like this? 50 00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:27,730 You mean the existential fear that someone may read your work 51 00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:30,400 and discover you to be a fraud? 52 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:31,484 Yes! 53 00:02:31,568 --> 00:02:32,527 No. 54 00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:33,945 Oh. 55 00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:33,945 But! 56 00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:37,824 It sounds like all you need is a dram of confidence. 57 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:40,743 Why don't you send me your novel, 58 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:44,539 then stop by my chateau to chat about it? 59 00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:47,083 You want... 60 00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:48,918 to read... 61 00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:00,847 Alex, my boy! 62 00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:03,683 Welcome to my humble - 18th- - Century mansion 63 00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:06,811 I had flown in piece by piece from Windsor! 64 00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:09,105 I'm quite wealthy, you see. 65 00:03:09,105 --> 00:03:10,982 From writing. 66 00:03:10,982 --> 00:03:12,650 Can I get you anything? 67 00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:15,194 Spot of tea? Antique sword? 68 00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:16,362 Rembrandt? 69 00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:17,655 Wow! Are those real? 70 00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:19,449 Oh, yes. 71 00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:21,993 I like to keep a couple of mummies around 72 00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:23,703 to lift my spirits. 73 00:03:23,703 --> 00:03:26,956 Who's still alive now, Amenhotep?! 74 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,959 And what is this? 75 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:32,795 Oh, that ancient meteor? 76 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:36,507 It's actually quite helpful with my process. 77 00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:39,969 Now let's stop pissing about and get into it. 78 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:42,138 I read your novel, and I loved it 79 00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:44,515 like a badger loves brambleberries. 80 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,809 You... Jack Kleghorn... 81 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:48,102 Sir Jack. 82 00:03:48,186 --> 00:03:49,646 Sir Jack Kleghorn. 83 00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,314 Loved my novel. 84 00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:54,525 When Psybjorn seduces Lord Universo 85 00:03:54,609 --> 00:03:56,152 to discover his weakness? 86 00:03:56,152 --> 00:03:59,447 I practically -- what's the American phrase? 87 00:03:59,447 --> 00:04:01,032 "Busted a nut?" 88 00:04:01,032 --> 00:04:02,992 Ah! This is... 89 00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,577 Oh! I just... 90 00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:07,163 Don't get too excited, old sport. 91 00:04:07,163 --> 00:04:10,792 You have work to do if you want to be the next 92 00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,543 Sir Jack Kleghorn. 93 00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:16,798 Yes, yes! I'll do whatever I have to do! 94 00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,925 Then get to writing! 95 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:20,093 Wait, right now? 96 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,469 Type, boy, type! 97 00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:24,806 Do you think James Patterson has confidence issues? 98 00:04:24,806 --> 00:04:29,268 He's finished a book since I started this sentence. 99 00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:37,402 ♪ Please Mr. Kleghorn ♪ 100 00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:39,737 ♪ Read my book, it's erotic fiction ♪ 101 00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:41,280 ♪ With a Viking hook ♪ 102 00:04:41,364 --> 00:04:44,367 ♪ I would give my right arm to write like you ♪ 103 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:49,414 ♪ I crave success as a serial fiction author ♪ 104 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:53,501 ♪ Serial fiction author ♪ 105 00:04:57,422 --> 00:04:59,966 Alex, it seems like Jack is working you to the bone. 106 00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:02,844 Sir Jack is working me to the bone? 107 00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:04,178 And I'm fine. 108 00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:06,889 My favorite author thinks I've got potential. 109 00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:08,891 And I finally feel confident. 110 00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,810 Why does he make you do a ton of exercise? 111 00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:13,479 Strong body strong mind, no-doy. 112 00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:15,231 You wouldn't get it. 113 00:05:15,231 --> 00:05:16,983 We think you should at least get some sleep. 114 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:21,070 Jack says sleep is for wankers, and wanking is for losers, 115 00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:23,948 so I don't do either anymore. 116 00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:25,450 Alex, you're being insane. 117 00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,326 Ohhh, I see. 118 00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:29,245 You're all jealous. 119 00:05:29,245 --> 00:05:32,081 I'm going back to Sir Jack's, and if you don't like it, 120 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,458 you can kiss my... 121 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:37,837 ...novel-writing ass! 122 00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:40,339 You close the door, Josh. 123 00:05:41,758 --> 00:05:43,634 Sir Jack? 124 00:05:43,718 --> 00:05:47,096 His name is Alex Dorpenberger. 125 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:48,598 He's brilliant! 126 00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:51,267 A once-in-a-generation talent! 127 00:05:51,267 --> 00:05:54,771 Yes, you've got to meet him right away. 128 00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:57,106 I'm sorry, I couldn't help overhearing. 129 00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:59,525 Was that...? My agent, dear boy! 130 00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:04,072 I was just calling to let him know that I'm the next you. 131 00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:05,698 That's incred-- 132 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:09,243 Wait, don't you mean I'm the next you? 133 00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:11,746 Absolutely not! 134 00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:17,502 Huh? 135 00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:19,962 Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey! 136 00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:23,299 I hope I didn't bash your bally brains in. 137 00:06:23,299 --> 00:06:24,675 What the hell is going on?! 138 00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:28,221 We're going to do a little freaky Friday! 139 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:32,016 What? We're swapping bodies, dear boy! 140 00:06:33,559 --> 00:06:36,646 Okay, got it. You're crazy. 141 00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:39,315 Crazy about eternal life! 142 00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:42,360 How would you like to hear a yarn? 143 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:43,945 Do I have a choice? 144 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:48,825 Once upon a time, 44,000 years ago give or take, 145 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:52,703 I was but a humble caveman. 146 00:06:52,787 --> 00:06:54,997 Twas the early days of art, 147 00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,917 but I saw how rewarding it could be. 148 00:07:00,503 --> 00:07:04,215 I saw an opportunity to "cash in." 149 00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:07,385 I was history's first plagiarist, 150 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:12,181 and that didn't bust anyone's nuts. 151 00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:15,518 But then a miracle! 152 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:31,200 This space meteor had caused us to switch bodies! 153 00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:34,162 I'd escaped death, and as a bonus, 154 00:07:34,162 --> 00:07:38,541 I was able to rip off the other guy without consequence! 155 00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:42,336 My life, as the modern teens say, "slapped." 156 00:07:42,420 --> 00:07:47,258 And with the meteor in my possession, it never had to end. 157 00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:49,218 Whenever my body grew old, 158 00:07:49,302 --> 00:07:51,888 I'd find an undiscovered young artist, 159 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,015 make them churn out fresh content, 160 00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:57,560 take over their body, and murder the poor twit. 161 00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:02,523 So, wait a minute, you're just some kind of crappy thief? 162 00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:06,360 I am an exceptional thief, Mr. Dorpenberger! 163 00:08:06,444 --> 00:08:10,740 Time for you to shut what is soon to be my mouth. 164 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:16,120 Oh, no! I'm old as shit! 165 00:08:17,788 --> 00:08:20,583 Well, everything seems to be tickety-boo! 166 00:08:20,583 --> 00:08:22,960 Let's get to killing you, shall we? 167 00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:25,546 Oh, bollocks. 168 00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:29,217 I always forget to untie myself before swapping. 169 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:37,892 Guys! You have to help me! 170 00:08:37,892 --> 00:08:40,144 I'm actually Alex! 171 00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:44,106 Sir Jack used a magic meteor to swap bodies with me! 172 00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,983 Okay, at first I thought you were 173 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,360 just really good at impressions, 174 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,779 and I was like "Hello?! SNL?" 175 00:08:49,779 --> 00:08:51,364 But the meteor thing makes more sense. 176 00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,074 Look, you guys were right when you said 177 00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:55,952 Sir Jack was mistreating me, but you've got to help me! 178 00:08:57,787 --> 00:08:59,455 Alex? 179 00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:00,957 Not for long! 180 00:09:00,957 --> 00:09:03,459 Now, hand over the manuscripts and meteor 181 00:09:03,459 --> 00:09:05,795 and I shan't decapitate you. 182 00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:07,338 You're way hotter with that voice. 183 00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:08,798 Hey! 184 00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:18,182 My precious! 185 00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:23,688 Josh: Whoa. Everyone's friggin huge. 186 00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,648 Candice: Hell yeah, I'm old enough to cuss! 187 00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:28,025 Bridgette: I'm literally inside my ex. 188 00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:29,485 My therapist is gonna love this. 189 00:09:29,485 --> 00:09:31,279 Emily: Wait. So who's in Bridgette? 190 00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:32,738 That's Sir Bridgette. 191 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:39,829 Josh, you need to do some curls. 192 00:09:41,289 --> 00:09:44,417 Ow! I did not think that through. 193 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,419 No, you really didn't. 194 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,504 Anyhoo, enjoy hell! 195 00:09:48,504 --> 00:09:50,589 Stop! 196 00:09:50,673 --> 00:09:54,051 Let her go, or I'll torch the manuscripts! 197 00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:57,638 What sort of imbecile would destroy his life's work? 198 00:09:57,722 --> 00:10:02,518 An imbecile who loves his friends! 199 00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:05,354 No! My livelihood! 200 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,442 Catch! 201 00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:15,740 Well, that's no good. 202 00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:20,202 Can someone please cover my eyes? 203 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,206 Well, that took a ton of math, 204 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,541 but I think everyone 205 00:10:25,541 --> 00:10:27,877 is who they're supposed to be at this point. 206 00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,545 I'm sorry your idol turned out to be 207 00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:31,714 an ancient body-stealing fraud. 208 00:10:31,714 --> 00:10:34,508 Eh. Could happen to anyone. 209 00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:39,889 Guess I should cancel my meeting with Jack's agent, though. 210 00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:42,141 You must have something you can show him. 211 00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:44,560 Nope. This was everything. 212 00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:46,645 Unless... 213 00:10:46,729 --> 00:10:49,190 And then right at the last second, 214 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:54,028 they switch bodies again, and Jack dies. 215 00:10:54,028 --> 00:10:55,654 The end. 216 00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,908 Yeahhh, it's gonna be a pass. 217 00:10:58,908 --> 00:10:59,909 That's fair.