1
00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:09,570
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

2
00:00:09,570 --> 00:00:11,110
[both grunting]

3
00:00:22,410 --> 00:00:23,410
[squawk]

4
00:00:30,630 --> 00:00:32,180
[heavy breathing]

5
00:00:32,170 --> 00:00:34,380
‐ Oh, my god, oh, my god, oh, my god,
we don't have noses!

6
00:00:34,380 --> 00:00:35,090
[all gasp]

7
00:00:36,140 --> 00:00:40,060
KORVO: Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia
until the asteroid hit.

8
00:00:41,470 --> 00:00:43,680
One hundred adults and their replicants
were issued a pupa

9
00:00:43,690 --> 00:00:45,770
and escaped into, uh, the space,

10
00:00:48,820 --> 00:00:51,820
We crashed on Earth, stranding us
on an already overpopulated planet.

11
00:00:51,820 --> 00:00:53,450
That's right,
I've been talking this whole time.

12
00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:55,230
I'm the one holding the pupa.
My name's Korvo.

13
00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:57,040
This is, this is my show.
I just dropped the pupa.

14
00:00:57,030 --> 00:00:59,070
Do you see me?
[stammers] This is ridiculous.

15
00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:01,000
I hate Earth.
It's a horrible home.

16
00:01:00,990 --> 00:01:03,660
People are stupid.
Why did they make so many languages?

17
00:01:03,660 --> 00:01:05,780
Why didn't they just get together
and figure out one language

18
00:01:05,790 --> 00:01:08,170
so when I go to a Mexican restaurant
I can just order "cheese tube"

19
00:01:08,170 --> 00:01:09,880
and not have someone
roll their eyes at me.

20
00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:11,880
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

21
00:01:11,880 --> 00:01:14,430
♪

22
00:01:18,260 --> 00:01:19,760
[birds cawing]

23
00:01:19,760 --> 00:01:21,800
‐ There's Kevin.
Ooh, he's got somethin' cool.

24
00:01:23,980 --> 00:01:25,980
‐ What is that?
It looks amazing.

25
00:01:25,980 --> 00:01:26,980
Come on, come on.

26
00:01:29,940 --> 00:01:32,990
Oh, Korvo,
Terry who looks like a Gary.

27
00:01:32,980 --> 00:01:34,400
‐ I wish.
‐ Can we help you

28
00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:36,060
with your "tig old bitties" sign?

29
00:01:36,070 --> 00:01:37,660
What is that?
A Catholic thing?

30
00:01:37,660 --> 00:01:39,700
‐ [laughs]
No.

31
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:42,000
Tig old bitties.
You get it?

32
00:01:41,990 --> 00:01:44,490
Think about it.
Tig. Old. Bitties.

33
00:01:46,160 --> 00:01:47,620
It's announcing that
the bitties are aged.

34
00:01:47,620 --> 00:01:49,080
‐ Oh, my favorite bitties are tig.

35
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:50,580
‐ It's a joke sign for my man cave.

36
00:01:56,970 --> 00:01:59,390
A place I can express
my most private self.

37
00:02:01,140 --> 00:02:03,520
‐ Ooh.
‐ And the classic bass.

38
00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:07,720
‐ What?
He's talking to me?

39
00:02:07,730 --> 00:02:08,940
This fish is full of surprises.

40
00:02:08,940 --> 00:02:11,530
‐ Ooh, posted rules.
Number one, the man is always right.

41
00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:13,480
Number two, sports are life.

42
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:14,480
These are all new to me.

43
00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:16,100
I don't want to be in violation
of any rules.

44
00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:20,480
‐ [gasps]
‐ Oh, my God.

45
00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:22,650
‐ God damn it, this‐

46
00:02:22,660 --> 00:02:24,080
‐ Oh, oh, my.
‐ Ooh.

47
00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:26,120
‐ There it is.
‐ Kevin, are you coming up‐‐

48
00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:29,800
oh, god, did you actually spend $3,000
on that misogynistic sign?

49
00:02:29,790 --> 00:02:31,200
What is wrong with you?
‐ Babe, what I do

50
00:02:31,210 --> 00:02:33,170
with my Christmas bonus
is my Christmas business.

51
00:02:33,170 --> 00:02:34,340
‐ [sighs]

52
00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,040
Please, please, please, please
can we have a man cave?

53
00:02:38,050 --> 00:02:39,600
‐ Yes.
‐ What, oh, really?

54
00:02:39,590 --> 00:02:41,760
Oh, man, you should have held out.
I was gonna offer to suck your‐‐

55
00:02:41,760 --> 00:02:44,300
‐ Kevin is so confident and happy.
He must get so much work done.

56
00:02:44,310 --> 00:02:46,980
Imagine how great our lives would be
if we could be this confident.

57
00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:50,970
‐ Shut up, Kevin, we're imagining.

58
00:02:51,860 --> 00:02:54,530
‐ From Coretta Scott King
to Jill Soloway,

59
00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:56,100
these are just a few notable feminists

60
00:02:56,110 --> 00:02:58,240
who improved the lives
of women everywhere.

61
00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:00,530
Ladies, this semester, your final grade

62
00:03:00,530 --> 00:03:02,790
depends on proof that you
fought the patriarchy.

63
00:03:02,780 --> 00:03:05,990
I want a full report on a glass ceiling
you tried to shatter by next Friday.

64
00:03:05,990 --> 00:03:07,820
‐ What does that even mean?

65
00:03:07,830 --> 00:03:09,840
‐ Uh, Miss Perez, what,
what do the boys have to do?

66
00:03:09,830 --> 00:03:12,580
‐ I don't care, the boys can just draw
a picture of a lightsaber or something.

67
00:03:12,580 --> 00:03:15,000
You might as well learn now that life
is just easier for you.

68
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:17,170
[bell ringing]
‐ Don't forget to rate and tip me
on the Teach app.

69
00:03:17,170 --> 00:03:20,170
Guys, guys, come on.
I need it for my asthma medicine.

70
00:03:20,170 --> 00:03:21,550
I live near the quarry.

71
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,430
I thought it meant I'd get
the better McDonald's toys.

72
00:03:27,430 --> 00:03:29,090
Now I have to topple something?

73
00:03:31,230 --> 00:03:34,110
I tried to explain that to you
the minute I chose to be a man

74
00:03:34,110 --> 00:03:35,320
and became better at explaining things.

75
00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:39,490
‐ I just need to find a glass ceiling
and shatter the crap out of it.

76
00:03:39,490 --> 00:03:43,490
Otherwise, Jill Soloway made I Love Dick
for nothing.

77
00:03:43,490 --> 00:03:45,750
Ooh, you wanna help?
We could topple it together.

78
00:03:45,740 --> 00:03:47,650
‐ Yeah, I'm gonna pass.
I'm just gonna hang back

79
00:03:47,660 --> 00:03:49,170
and do a regular alien thing today.

80
00:03:51,330 --> 00:03:53,040
‐ Seems kind of like a loaded topic.

81
00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:55,870
Everyone on the internet is always
fighting about who can be president

82
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:57,550
or who can bust ghosts, but good luck.

83
00:03:57,550 --> 00:03:59,180
‐ It is not loaded!

84
00:03:59,170 --> 00:04:01,630
Gender issues are a totally normal
thing to mess with.

85
00:04:01,630 --> 00:04:06,630
Come on, Yumyulack, don't be like that.
Don't be such a man.

86
00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:09,270
‐ Hey, do you guys mind
if I borrow the boomerang?

87
00:04:09,270 --> 00:04:10,810
Whoa, what's going on in here?

88
00:04:10,810 --> 00:04:12,730
‐ Welcome to our "manc ave."

89
00:04:12,730 --> 00:04:14,440
‐ Man cave!

90
00:04:16,190 --> 00:04:19,070
Please read and strictly abide
by all of them before having fun.

91
00:04:19,070 --> 00:04:21,160
‐ Man only?
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.

92
00:04:21,150 --> 00:04:22,480
Are you guys doing a gender thing, too?

93
00:04:26,870 --> 00:04:29,920
Some sort of human code.
They were out of "tig old bitties" signs

94
00:04:29,910 --> 00:04:32,320
but the salesman said
it was in the same area, so...

95
00:04:32,330 --> 00:04:33,500
[whirring]

96
00:04:33,500 --> 00:04:35,170
Pretty great, right?
Just like Kevin's.

97
00:04:35,170 --> 00:04:37,010
‐ No, yeah, I love how
it moves up and down.

98
00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:38,120
Oh, it keeps you guessing.

99
00:04:38,420 --> 00:04:40,550
Ah, football is amazing.

100
00:04:40,550 --> 00:04:42,640
Apparently, we can watch
jets battle the color brown.

101
00:04:47,390 --> 00:04:50,310
Now everybody just sit back,
grab a cold one,

102
00:04:50,310 --> 00:04:53,310
and let the awesomeness
of the "manc ave" wash over them.

103
00:04:53,310 --> 00:04:55,320
[football game on TV, indistinct]

104
00:04:57,020 --> 00:04:58,430
‐ Any second now.

105
00:05:01,860 --> 00:05:03,660
[grunting]

106
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:08,190
‐ Oh, hello, I'm a female and
I'm looking for a patriarchy to topple.

107
00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:11,830
I've never played this game,
but can I be your kicker, please?

108
00:05:11,830 --> 00:05:13,880
‐ [laughs]
No way.

109
00:05:13,870 --> 00:05:16,910
‐ A ha! You're freaking out
that I would fundamentally alter

110
00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:20,760
the way society felt about women
in a male‐dominated sport.

111
00:05:20,750 --> 00:05:22,420
Gotcha, suckers!

112
00:05:22,420 --> 00:05:25,500
‐ What? No. Girls have played
on high school football teams for years.

113
00:05:25,510 --> 00:05:27,810
You just can't be the kicker
because we already went

114
00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:30,420
to the state supreme court
so a dog could be kicker.

115
00:05:31,100 --> 00:05:34,900
Damn, Denver!
Good boy, good boy.

116
00:05:34,890 --> 00:05:36,680
You can be our starting quarterback.
How about that?

117
00:05:36,690 --> 00:05:40,070
Hey, Dylan! This girl who I haven't
seen play yet is taking your place.

118
00:05:40,060 --> 00:05:42,600
‐ I'm fine with that.
It's not about winning. Woo!

119
00:05:42,610 --> 00:05:46,490
‐ Ugh, finding a new struggle for women
is gonna be a real struggle.

120
00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:50,990
‐ Um, I don't think so.

121
00:05:50,990 --> 00:05:52,650
Maybe it happened
and we just didn't notice yet?

122
00:05:52,660 --> 00:05:54,630
‐ No, this is wrong.
Something's missing, Terry.

123
00:05:54,620 --> 00:05:57,080
There has to be something Kevin
had in his "ave" that we don't have.

124
00:05:57,080 --> 00:06:00,080
‐ No, no, I know. I mean, we have
very man‐centric movie posters

125
00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,870
with man themes like Boys Don't Cry,
Boys On The Side,

126
00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:05,050
How To Lose a Guy in Ten Days.

127
00:06:05,050 --> 00:06:08,100
‐ Terry, pull up a live hologram feed
of Kevin's "manc ave."

128
00:06:08,090 --> 00:06:09,840
[whooshing]

129
00:06:10,090 --> 00:06:12,340
See, I don't get it.
It's exactly the same.

130
00:06:12,350 --> 00:06:14,270
Computer, analyze nitrogen levels and‐‐

131
00:06:14,270 --> 00:06:16,770
‐ Can you please come watch your son
blow out his candles?

132
00:06:16,770 --> 00:06:18,770
Everyone's waiting.
‐ Oh, he'll be three

133
00:06:18,770 --> 00:06:19,940
for like a whole year.

134
00:06:19,940 --> 00:06:21,440
‐ Kevin.
‐ What kind of cake?

135
00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:23,030
‐ Kevin!
‐ All right!

136
00:06:23,020 --> 00:06:25,650
[groans]
‐ God, I hate this man cave.

137
00:06:25,650 --> 00:06:27,360
‐ Computer, strip everything but Angela.

138
00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:30,190
‐ He spends all of his time
in his stupid room full of toys

139
00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:31,580
instead of with his family.

140
00:06:31,570 --> 00:06:33,360
I should have married Omry.

141
00:06:33,370 --> 00:06:36,040
‐ Terry, we were totally missing
the point of "manc aves."

142
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:37,830
‐ Oh, that we need to throw
way more birthday parties?

143
00:06:37,830 --> 00:06:39,710
‐ The best part of being
in a "manc ave," Terry,

144
00:06:39,710 --> 00:06:42,710
is someone being irritated
that you're in a "manc ave."

145
00:06:42,710 --> 00:06:44,680
‐ But I don't wanna take turns in here.
‐ Neither do I.

146
00:06:44,670 --> 00:06:46,250
Which means we'll have to

147
00:06:46,260 --> 00:06:48,720
build a robot that hates us being
in the "manc ave."

148
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,260
[both cheering]

149
00:06:50,260 --> 00:06:51,720
‐ Yeah!
‐ Terry!

150
00:06:52,010 --> 00:06:54,340
‐ By "we," you mean you, right?
‐ Yes, I'm going to be doing all the work.

151
00:06:54,350 --> 00:06:55,640
I was just trying to be nice.

152
00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,430
‐ Wow, that was fast.
‐ I used a lot of parts

153
00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:00,520
from the last robot I made.

154
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,990
‐ The one that was supposed to kill
those kids who threw a cup of pee at you?

155
00:07:02,980 --> 00:07:04,270
You got over that?
‐ For the moment,

156
00:07:04,270 --> 00:07:05,390
they may keep their lives.

157
00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:06,660
‐ Well, I tell you what,
here's the headline.

158
00:07:06,650 --> 00:07:09,270
It looks great.
Now did you use the specs I gave you

159
00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:11,490
to make her the perfect combo
of every TV wife/mom?

160
00:07:13,410 --> 00:07:15,580
twenty percent doting hot mom
from Modern Family,

161
00:07:15,580 --> 00:07:17,750
fifteen percent fast‐talking
Gilmore Girls mom

162
00:07:17,750 --> 00:07:20,290
and ten percent Marge Simpson
because she's got blue hair.

163
00:07:20,290 --> 00:07:22,380
‐ Is that too many percents?
‐ No, it's, it's under actually.

164
00:07:22,380 --> 00:07:25,880
The rest is just filler code, except for
a pinch of Sophia from Golden Girls.

165
00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:28,390
That was one sassy old lady, you know?
I couldn't resist.

166
00:07:28,380 --> 00:07:29,920
‐ Twenty‐five, 83...

167
00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:32,500
‐ Are you using
your abaca‐dactals like a baby?

168
00:07:32,510 --> 00:07:35,230
What, what are you, 80?
‐ Ah, now I have to start over.

169
00:07:37,970 --> 00:07:40,890
It stands for Patricia Automated
Television Retro‐fitted

170
00:07:40,890 --> 00:07:42,720
Intelligent Companion In Action.

171
00:07:42,730 --> 00:07:44,400
‐ You know what, it's okay
if you made that up to fit.

172
00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:46,990
You chose a name with two I's and two A's.
That's already hard.

173
00:07:51,280 --> 00:07:52,410
[whirring]

174
00:07:52,410 --> 00:07:54,830
PATRICIA:
[gasps] Korvo, Terry.

175
00:07:54,820 --> 00:07:57,280
Pupa! I hope you don't plan
to spend all day

176
00:07:57,290 --> 00:08:00,540
in your awful, disgusting "manc ave."
We have chores to do.

177
00:08:00,540 --> 00:08:02,630
‐ Why are didgeridoos so expensive?
‐ What, what?

178
00:08:02,620 --> 00:08:06,210
‐ Five thousand dollars. It's a tube!
Still buying it.

179
00:08:06,210 --> 00:08:09,330
Did you guys make a woman robot?
‐ Oh, yeah, awesome, right?

180
00:08:09,340 --> 00:08:11,050
Yeah, we built her to hate the "manc ave."

181
00:08:11,050 --> 00:08:13,010
I mean, look at how awesome she is.
Look at her, look at her go.

182
00:08:13,010 --> 00:08:14,310
She's hatin' it perfect.
‐ No, no, no.

183
00:08:14,300 --> 00:08:16,010
You guys are wading into
a whole gender thing.

184
00:08:16,010 --> 00:08:18,090
I'm telling you, this can't
end well for anybody.

185
00:08:18,100 --> 00:08:19,230
I'm outta here.
G'day.

186
00:08:19,220 --> 00:08:21,470
‐ This isn't a gender thing‐‐
‐ I said g'day!

187
00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:24,530
‐ No matter what the problem is,
she finds a way to blame the "manc ave."

188
00:08:24,520 --> 00:08:27,270
Just, just like a real wife.
PATRICIA: I fucking hate this "manc ave."

189
00:08:27,270 --> 00:08:29,440
‐ Oh, she makes me
wanna go in there so bad!

190
00:08:29,690 --> 00:08:31,900
Ah, yeah!
KORVO: Oh, ho, ho, it worked!

191
00:08:32,070 --> 00:08:33,490
[Pupa burps]

192
00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:38,910
‐ Hi, guys. I, a girl, would like to be
on your men's lacrosse team.

193
00:08:38,910 --> 00:08:41,290
I also know nothing about lacrosse.

194
00:08:41,290 --> 00:08:43,670
‐ Ha ha, did you hear that?
‐ Oh, I heard it, Chad.

195
00:08:43,670 --> 00:08:45,460
But I don't believe it.
Say it again, girl.

196
00:08:48,210 --> 00:08:51,120
I demand to be on your boys' team.
What's the problem?

197
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:53,970
Can't stand a girl trying to step on
your "boys only" field?

198
00:08:53,970 --> 00:08:56,680
‐ No, we've been asking for a girl
to join our team for years.

199
00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:58,890
Oh, the football guys will finally
stop mocking us.

200
00:08:58,890 --> 00:09:01,060
‐ No, come on,
I need this to be a struggle.

201
00:09:01,060 --> 00:09:02,810
‐ Chads, we got a girl on the team!

202
00:09:02,810 --> 00:09:04,150
[cheering]

203
00:09:04,140 --> 00:09:06,770
‐ Hey, stop.
[groaning]

204
00:09:08,310 --> 00:09:12,150
Attention, esports team.
I know that gamers are misogynistic,

205
00:09:12,150 --> 00:09:16,070
and that's why all female bodies
in games have unrealistic proportions

206
00:09:16,070 --> 00:09:19,570
and are programmed to give the gamer
an unhealthy amount of eye contact.

207
00:09:19,580 --> 00:09:21,830
Let me in.
‐ Yeah, another girl!

208
00:09:21,830 --> 00:09:24,170
‐ Wait, am I the only guy in here?
Oh, no.

209
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:26,660
I've been using some very coded language.

210
00:09:26,670 --> 00:09:27,500
[bell rings]

211
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:30,470
‐ Australian music is so good.
It's like a whole genre.

212
00:09:30,460 --> 00:09:34,130
‐ You're looking at this town's
first female firefighter.

213
00:09:34,130 --> 00:09:36,800
I found my glass ceiling
and fucking shattered it,

214
00:09:36,800 --> 00:09:38,260
and saved most of a family.

215
00:09:38,260 --> 00:09:41,010
‐ Well, I'm the first woman
to mansplain jazz.

216
00:09:41,010 --> 00:09:43,260
It's, like, all about syncopation.

217
00:09:43,270 --> 00:09:45,940
‐ That's great and all,
but I saved most of a family.

218
00:09:47,850 --> 00:09:50,770
‐ Because it sounds better than
just the two dogs.

219
00:09:50,770 --> 00:09:52,440
‐ Oh, Yumyulack, come here.

220
00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:55,690
If I can't find a glass ceiling
to break soon,

221
00:09:55,700 --> 00:09:58,410
they're all gonna get broken without me,
and then I'm gonna fail,

222
00:09:58,410 --> 00:10:00,700
and then they're gonna put me
in the dumb kid's class in room B.

223
00:10:00,700 --> 00:10:03,040
‐ Room B is awesome.
We get to do art all day.

224
00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:04,290
And stop telling me things.

225
00:10:04,290 --> 00:10:06,380
I already said
I wasn't touching gender stuff.

226
00:10:06,370 --> 00:10:07,700
‐ I'm just out of ideas.

227
00:10:07,710 --> 00:10:09,420
‐ You know what I do
when I'm out of ideas?

228
00:10:09,420 --> 00:10:12,470
Cocaine. And then I get like,
a million ideas at once.

229
00:10:12,460 --> 00:10:13,960
[grunts]

230
00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:16,880
Ooh, ooh, I got it.
Pants that fly but are also dogs.

231
00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:17,710
‐ Hm.

232
00:10:18,680 --> 00:10:21,180
Well, I do love cocaine,
but isn't it illegal?

233
00:10:21,180 --> 00:10:23,810
‐ Everything cool is illegal!
Besides, cocaine is okay for us to eat

234
00:10:23,810 --> 00:10:25,520
because our alien bodies
process it differently.

235
00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:26,810
It's just like sugar.
I make it myself.

236
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,110
And then I'll break it.
‐ Hey, come on.

237
00:10:32,110 --> 00:10:33,530
I didn't help with that epiphany.

238
00:10:33,530 --> 00:10:35,410
I'm just eating cocaine
like we usually do.

239
00:10:35,400 --> 00:10:37,560
Leave me out of it.
‐ Thanks for your help, Yumyulack!

240
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:40,160
‐ Stop it!
I'm gonna go fight my shadow!

241
00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:48,590
‐ Ah, PATRICIA, I bet you hate
how we sit in the "manc ave" all day

242
00:10:48,580 --> 00:10:50,830
while you're up here not enjoying
the "manc ave."

243
00:10:51,670 --> 00:10:53,760
PATRICIA:
What's with all the dirty dishes, Korvo?

244
00:10:53,750 --> 00:10:55,370
‐ I left them here for you to clean.

245
00:10:55,380 --> 00:10:57,430
PATRICIA: You see this here?
It's called a dishwasher.

246
00:10:57,420 --> 00:11:00,630
And this is how you turn it on.
[gasps] Ooh!

247
00:11:00,640 --> 00:11:03,430
Now that's at least one thing
you can finally learn to turn on.

248
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:06,350
Not that it matters since
you're an alien who has no dick.

249
00:11:06,350 --> 00:11:08,940
I guess my mom was right.
What am I supposed to do with that?

250
00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:09,650
No dick!

251
00:11:09,640 --> 00:11:11,220
[laugh track plays]

252
00:11:11,230 --> 00:11:13,150
‐ No one's ever spoken to me like that.

253
00:11:13,150 --> 00:11:15,320
This angry wife subroutine
must be a side effect

254
00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:17,280
of your anti‐"manc ave" programming.

255
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:20,030
PATRICIA: Or maybe I'm just tired
of being married to an idiot

256
00:11:20,030 --> 00:11:22,450
who leaves his dirty socks
in the living room.
[audience groans playing]

257
00:11:22,450 --> 00:11:24,790
‐ This must be a byproduct
from all the TV mom data

258
00:11:24,780 --> 00:11:27,660
I fed into your personality.
You're a perfect organism.

259
00:11:27,660 --> 00:11:31,030
PATRICIA: Byproduct? You don't make
enough money to buy me any products.

260
00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:34,420
And the only time I can organism
is when I'm watching Outlander.

261
00:11:34,420 --> 00:11:36,680
‐ You're making me feel smaller
and less of a man.

262
00:11:36,670 --> 00:11:38,460
I love it.
Quick, do it again.

263
00:11:38,460 --> 00:11:41,340
PATRICIA: Quick is the only way
you know how to do anything.

264
00:11:41,340 --> 00:11:42,420
[laugh track plays]

265
00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:44,970
‐ [coos]

266
00:11:44,970 --> 00:11:48,220
‐ Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, PATRICIA.
I foosed my shoulder.

267
00:11:49,980 --> 00:11:52,400
PATRICIA: Aw, honey, let me
take care of that for you.

268
00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:53,780
One, two‐‐

269
00:11:53,770 --> 00:11:55,850
‐ [yells]

270
00:11:56,980 --> 00:11:57,980
Owie.

271
00:11:57,980 --> 00:12:00,360
PATRICIA: Does that feel better?
‐ A little.

272
00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:03,030
PATRICIA: You were a really
brave little man just then.

273
00:12:03,030 --> 00:12:04,900
I'm so proud of you.
Here.

274
00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:09,710
That was a special kiss from Mommy.
Does that feel better?

275
00:12:09,700 --> 00:12:12,780
‐ I need another one.
PATRICIA: There you go, sweetie.

276
00:12:12,790 --> 00:12:15,130
‐ I tell you what, this mommy
must be a residual byproduct

277
00:12:15,130 --> 00:12:16,550
of me being so brave, huh?

278
00:12:16,540 --> 00:12:20,500
PATRICIA: I'm baking cookies in here.
Does baby wanna lick my spoon?

279
00:12:20,510 --> 00:12:22,050
‐ [moaning]

280
00:12:23,340 --> 00:12:25,210
Oh, my God, what is this feeling
I'm feeling?

281
00:12:25,220 --> 00:12:26,770
Oh, I never want it to end.

282
00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:28,800
[audience awws]

283
00:12:29,180 --> 00:12:30,140
[bell rings]

284
00:12:31,230 --> 00:12:33,690
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

285
00:12:33,690 --> 00:12:35,820
♪

286
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:41,990
‐ Where have you been?
‐ Oh, oh, uh,

287
00:12:41,990 --> 00:12:43,160
just making this delicious sundae.

288
00:12:43,150 --> 00:12:44,320
‐ By yourself?
‐ Uh‐huh.

289
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:46,650
‐ Terry, you're lying.
You don't know how to peel a banana.

290
00:12:46,660 --> 00:12:48,290
I always have to do it for you.
‐ Wait.

291
00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:49,740
Why are your shoulders slouched

292
00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:51,530
and why do you look like you have
a lower sense of confidence?

293
00:12:51,540 --> 00:12:54,460
‐ I was judging myself in the mirror.
I'm‐I'm very shameful.

294
00:12:54,460 --> 00:12:55,630
‐ You don't know how to self‐scrutinize.

295
00:12:55,630 --> 00:12:57,630
‐ I've been hanging out with PATRICIA.
She makes me feel something

296
00:12:57,630 --> 00:12:59,010
I've never felt before.
‐ Me, too.

297
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:00,040
‐ Emasculated.
‐ Nurtured.

298
00:13:00,050 --> 00:13:01,550
‐ I love the way she can just
cut right through me

299
00:13:01,550 --> 00:13:04,680
with a real tightly wound zinger.
I've never been so wonderfully beta.

300
00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:07,470
‐ Oh, she wipes my mouth with a wet wipe
and treats me like a baby.

301
00:13:07,470 --> 00:13:10,270
It's so comfortable and nurturing.
I never had a mom, Korvo.

302
00:13:10,270 --> 00:13:12,480
I never got baths.
‐ Terry, I know we specifically

303
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:15,190
created her to hate the "manc ave,"
but hear me out on this.

304
00:13:15,190 --> 00:13:17,230
What if we altered the rules
of the "manc ave"

305
00:13:17,230 --> 00:13:20,450
so we could invite PATRICIA
to hang out with us in the "manc ave"?

306
00:13:21,990 --> 00:13:23,490
Oh, that's perfect.
Let's, let's change the rules.

307
00:13:23,490 --> 00:13:25,080
‐ We're gonna change the rules.
Oh!

308
00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:27,150
PATRICIA:
But, but I hate this place.

309
00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:30,250
‐ I know, I know, but it's okay.
Look, huh, see?

310
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:32,110
It's okay for you to be here.
Isn't it fun?

311
00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:34,920
FISH: No, it's not.
Get out while you can. Run.

312
00:13:34,910 --> 00:13:37,410
‐ Ignore that fish, it's joking.
It's not serious.

313
00:13:37,420 --> 00:13:38,800
It's just having a jab.

314
00:13:40,380 --> 00:13:42,890
PATRICIA, I demand you overwrite
your hate of the "manc ave."

315
00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:45,920
PATRICIA:
Override, ov‐er‐ride...

316
00:13:45,930 --> 00:13:48,060
funny, you never ride me over.

317
00:13:51,930 --> 00:13:52,970
[stammering]

318
00:13:52,970 --> 00:13:54,340
[alarm blaring]

319
00:13:54,350 --> 00:13:56,730
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

320
00:13:56,730 --> 00:13:59,690
♪

321
00:13:59,690 --> 00:14:02,950
Must destroy manc ave!

322
00:14:05,570 --> 00:14:07,080
‐ You gave her rocket launchers?

323
00:14:07,070 --> 00:14:08,610
‐ It's harder to build a robot
without them, Terry.

324
00:14:08,620 --> 00:14:09,410
They're load‐bearing.

325
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:17,030
‐ [grunts]
Uh‐oh.

326
00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:20,590
Oh, dig old bicks.
I get it now.

327
00:14:20,590 --> 00:14:22,800
‐ You do? What, what does it mean?
‐ I don't know.

328
00:14:24,590 --> 00:14:26,430
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

329
00:14:26,420 --> 00:14:28,500
♪

330
00:14:32,850 --> 00:14:36,270
♪ I got the eye of the tiger ♪

331
00:14:36,430 --> 00:14:40,270
♪ I am dancing through the fire ♪

332
00:14:40,270 --> 00:14:42,890
♪ I am the champion ♪

333
00:14:42,900 --> 00:14:47,070
♪ And you're gonna hear me roar ♪

334
00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:51,040
♪ Louder, louder than a lion ♪

335
00:14:51,030 --> 00:14:53,820
♪ 'Cause I am the champion ♪

336
00:14:53,830 --> 00:14:57,040
‐ [flatly] Oh, no, please, stop.
Second door on the left.

337
00:14:59,670 --> 00:15:01,130
‐ Oh, no.

338
00:15:02,500 --> 00:15:06,120
‐ Excuse me, pardon me.
Female feminist hero comin' through.

339
00:15:06,130 --> 00:15:08,760
Move aside, men.
I, a woman,

340
00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:11,220
have arrived to topple the glass ceiling

341
00:15:11,220 --> 00:15:13,480
and shatter the fuck
out of the patriarchy.

342
00:15:13,470 --> 00:15:15,930
‐ Yeah, we're looking for Jesse,
the guy who set up this club.

343
00:15:15,930 --> 00:15:19,430
‐ Well, I've got news for you.
Jesse isn't a boy.

344
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,780
He's a girl, and it's me.

345
00:15:21,770 --> 00:15:23,430
‐ Whoa, whoa, whoa.
This is your club?

346
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:26,320
‐ Yep, sorry, but this isn't
a boy club after all.

347
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:28,070
‐ We don't wanna join.
We're here in protest

348
00:15:28,070 --> 00:15:29,580
to speak up for all the women
who are too weak

349
00:15:29,570 --> 00:15:30,520
to speak for themselves.

350
00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:32,330
‐ But I made this club to‐‐
‐ Do you have any idea

351
00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:34,150
how messed up it is to
discriminate against people

352
00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:35,750
based on their gender?
‐ Uh, yeah.

353
00:15:35,740 --> 00:15:37,740
I was just about to say that
when you interrupted‐‐

354
00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:40,250
‐ As the brother of two sisters,
nothing enrages me more

355
00:15:40,250 --> 00:15:42,630
than misogyny, and this is misogyny.

356
00:15:42,630 --> 00:15:43,960
‐ Uh‐huh, it's not.
‐ Yes, it is.

357
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,420
You need to shut this club down
right now.

358
00:15:45,420 --> 00:15:48,430
‐ No, not before I topple it.
I need it for my grade.

359
00:15:48,420 --> 00:15:50,840
‐ If she's not gonna do it,
we have to tear it down ourselves.

360
00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:52,000
‐ Please, stop.
‐ Let's get her

361
00:15:52,010 --> 00:15:54,770
before she creates an unsafe environment
for all women.

362
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:56,340
‐ Oh, no, no, no.
‐ She's running.

363
00:15:56,350 --> 00:15:59,230
That means she's guilty.
‐ Angry mob, bros.

364
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:01,180
‐ [sobs]

365
00:16:04,810 --> 00:16:07,190
‐ She's ruining the only thing
I actually liked about humans.

366
00:16:07,190 --> 00:16:08,900
We need to stop her.
TERRY: Okay, I say we just

367
00:16:08,900 --> 00:16:10,860
grab her and make her
tuck us into bed and read us stories.

368
00:16:11,030 --> 00:16:12,870
‐ We can't just grab her, Terry.
She'll slice us in half

369
00:16:12,860 --> 00:16:15,110
with her laser blades.
‐ And whose fault is that?

370
00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:16,540
Huh?
KORVO: I don't know what to do.

371
00:16:16,530 --> 00:16:19,280
Wait, if she hates the "manc aves,"
we need to lure her

372
00:16:19,290 --> 00:16:21,630
to the biggest, stupidest
"manc ave" we can find.

373
00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:23,620
‐ I know just the place.

374
00:16:25,540 --> 00:16:27,330
[men screaming]

375
00:16:27,340 --> 00:16:29,680
♪ sports arena music playing ♪

376
00:16:29,670 --> 00:16:30,920
‐ Oh!

377
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,670
♪

378
00:16:41,390 --> 00:16:42,680
‐ Oh, crap, here she comes.

379
00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:44,820
Get inside.

380
00:16:52,780 --> 00:16:54,540
[people screaming]

381
00:16:57,530 --> 00:16:59,530
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

382
00:16:59,540 --> 00:17:01,330
[lasers firing]

383
00:17:18,760 --> 00:17:20,840
‐ The activation ring.
We have to get it off her finger.

384
00:17:20,850 --> 00:17:22,270
Aim for the ring.
‐ How many tickets

385
00:17:22,270 --> 00:17:24,060
for all your sticky hands?
‐ I don't know.

386
00:17:24,060 --> 00:17:25,610
Like, a million.
Hey!

387
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:27,810
Those come out of the tickets
they pay me with.

388
00:17:30,070 --> 00:17:30,950
‐ Now!

389
00:17:30,940 --> 00:17:32,940
♪

390
00:17:44,710 --> 00:17:46,210
[lasers firing]

391
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:49,790
‐ Ms. Perez, Ms. Perez!
‐ Jesse, what are you doing here?

392
00:17:49,790 --> 00:17:51,460
‐ School stuff.
You wouldn't understand!

393
00:17:51,460 --> 00:17:52,330
‐ Get down!

394
00:17:53,050 --> 00:17:56,010
‐ Ms. Perez, I tried to make
a glass ceiling to break,

395
00:17:56,010 --> 00:17:58,770
but a bunch of male allies got mad.
You gotta help me.

396
00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:00,260
‐ What the fuck are you talking about?

397
00:18:00,260 --> 00:18:02,340
‐ I couldn't move us women
forward, Ms. Perez.

398
00:18:02,350 --> 00:18:03,230
Please don't give me an F.

399
00:18:03,220 --> 00:18:04,640
‐ I didn't even realize you were a girl.

400
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,930
I thought you were gonna draw
Count Dooku's lightsaber.

401
00:18:06,940 --> 00:18:08,570
‐ What?
But I have a bow.

402
00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:10,230
‐ I don't know,
you're green and your mouth

403
00:18:10,230 --> 00:18:12,730
extends past the boundaries of your face.
How would I know?

404
00:18:12,730 --> 00:18:15,110
If you really wanna topple
the patriarchy and get an A,

405
00:18:15,110 --> 00:18:17,190
this is your chance.
‐ You're right, Ms. Perez.

406
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:19,950
Every feminist hero had
their robot to conquer.

407
00:18:19,950 --> 00:18:22,250
♪ heroic music playing ♪

408
00:18:28,420 --> 00:18:32,050
PATRICA: Time for you two
naughty/disappointing boy men

409
00:18:32,050 --> 00:18:33,340
to learn a lesson.

410
00:18:35,550 --> 00:18:36,970
‐ PATRICIA, stop.

411
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,470
PATRICA: Gender not found.

412
00:18:39,470 --> 00:18:41,890
‐ That's because I'm an alien plant.

413
00:18:41,890 --> 00:18:44,520
It took me all this time to realize
that's okay.

414
00:18:44,520 --> 00:18:46,980
I can do whatever I want.
So can you.

415
00:18:47,980 --> 00:18:51,070
PATRICIA: But I'm a mom, I'm a wife,
I'm a mom, I'm a‐‐

416
00:18:51,060 --> 00:18:53,640
‐ No way, Jose.
You're a killer robot.

417
00:18:53,650 --> 00:18:56,490
And if that's what makes you happy,
then lean into it.

418
00:18:56,490 --> 00:19:00,120
PATRICIA: I don't have to kill men.
I could be killing anyone I want.

419
00:19:00,110 --> 00:19:02,900
No matter what gender.
I could kill everyone!

420
00:19:02,910 --> 00:19:04,330
‐ Ha, not today.

421
00:19:04,330 --> 00:19:10,170
PATRICIA: No, I was about to kill
all humans in the world...

422
00:19:11,130 --> 00:19:13,510
‐ Patricia, I'm sorry.
But I have to turn you off.

423
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:17,710
PATRICIA: You turn me off every day
when you take off your shirt.

424
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,600
‐ What's wrong, Korvo?
Why‐why'd you stop?

425
00:19:19,590 --> 00:19:22,590
‐ I can't deactivate her, Terry.
I didn't realize I had a hole in my heart.

426
00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:24,980
A hole that needed to be demeaned
with a non‐stop barrage

427
00:19:24,970 --> 00:19:26,890
of insults and sexual criticism.

428
00:19:26,890 --> 00:19:29,100
We can't kill her,
but we can't live with her.

429
00:19:29,100 --> 00:19:30,390
‐ So what do we do?

430
00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:33,440
‐ We started this thinking
we needed a "manc ave"

431
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,360
to fill a gaping hole inside of us.

432
00:19:35,360 --> 00:19:37,160
But what we truly needed was to know

433
00:19:37,150 --> 00:19:39,650
that we have
different types of gaping holes

434
00:19:39,650 --> 00:19:41,650
that need other ways to be filled.

435
00:19:41,660 --> 00:19:44,040
‐ You taught us that we don't have to
hide in an "ave," Mom.

436
00:19:44,030 --> 00:19:45,280
Thank you.
‐ We can't kill you

437
00:19:45,290 --> 00:19:47,370
and we can't have you going around
and setting stuff on fire.

438
00:19:47,370 --> 00:19:49,630
So from now on,
you'll live in this shipping container.

439
00:19:49,620 --> 00:19:51,330
‐ Do we really have to get rid of her?

440
00:19:51,330 --> 00:19:54,120
Maybe we can keep her around
like a feminist icon.

441
00:19:54,130 --> 00:19:56,720
PATRICIA: Your dress is too short.
Boys will think you're a slut.

442
00:19:56,710 --> 00:19:58,420
‐ You're not my real mom!
Shut up!

443
00:19:58,420 --> 00:20:00,460
‐ Patricia, it's time
to get in the container.

444
00:20:00,470 --> 00:20:03,520
Don't worry, you won't be bored.
I made you a cuck‐bot for company.

445
00:20:03,510 --> 00:20:06,630
CUCK: Does anyone want to go
to the Gap and make some returns?

446
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,650
‐ I didn't try to make him
look like Ted Cruz.

447
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,140
It just happens with these things.

448
00:20:10,140 --> 00:20:11,720
CUCK: Hello.
PATRICIA: You're wearing that?

449
00:20:11,730 --> 00:20:14,860
I thought I threw that out.
Why are you making that face?

450
00:20:14,860 --> 00:20:16,990
CUCK: I'm not making a face.
PATRICIA: God, you're annoying.

451
00:20:16,980 --> 00:20:19,650
Could you be more nasal?
A real man wouldn't let an alien

452
00:20:19,650 --> 00:20:21,940
bury him in a shipping container.

453
00:20:21,950 --> 00:20:23,740
‐ It's nice to know
that any time we miss her,

454
00:20:23,740 --> 00:20:26,910
we can come outside and we know
that she's just a few feet down there

455
00:20:26,910 --> 00:20:28,170
just ripping into him, you know?

456
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:31,530
On how he brushes his teeth, and how
he doesn't arch his back properly.

457
00:20:31,540 --> 00:20:33,800
The way he stands all crooked
and how he's all weasley

458
00:20:33,790 --> 00:20:36,540
and thin and not muscly or anything.

459
00:20:36,540 --> 00:20:39,250
‐ Yeah.
‐ Wow, I just had the craziest week.

460
00:20:39,260 --> 00:20:41,760
‐ Oh, yeah, you weren't around.
What were you doing this whole time?

461
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:44,100
‐ I accidentally let hundreds of koalas
out of the zoo

462
00:20:44,090 --> 00:20:46,630
and then spent a ton of time
rounding them all up.

463
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:49,650
‐ The zoo has the capacity to house
hundreds of koalas?

464
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:53,760
‐ Yeah, they were running all over town.
I had to coax them with didgeridoos.

465
00:20:53,770 --> 00:20:57,360
It was on the news.
Like, you‐you didn't see any of that?

466
00:20:57,360 --> 00:20:58,400
[grunting]

467
00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:00,450
Okay, get in, get in here, get in.

468
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:02,230
Hey, so how did your gender‐based
stories turn out?

469
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:04,790
‐ Uh, good, yeah.
I mean, I think we covered every angle

470
00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:06,030
and pretty much solved it, so.

471
00:21:06,030 --> 00:21:09,280
‐ Yeah, I think everyone
will be very happy with what we did.

472
00:21:09,290 --> 00:21:11,290
‐ Well, I'm glad we survived,
because I don't think

473
00:21:11,290 --> 00:21:13,790
there's a more controversial topic
we could have dealt with.

474
00:21:13,790 --> 00:21:15,840
‐ Okay, class.
Next assignment,

475
00:21:15,830 --> 00:21:19,540
everyone here has to find a racist
and teach them the error of their ways.

476
00:21:19,550 --> 00:21:20,680
‐ Yay!

477
00:21:20,670 --> 00:21:22,670
♪

478
00:22:05,010 --> 00:22:06,510
[imitating laser fire]