1
00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:54,748
Greece.

2
00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:59,515
People come here from all over

3
00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:04,196
to see the ancient ruins.

4
00:01:06,833 --> 00:01:08,767
To bask in history.

5
00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:14,804
To be a part of the birthplace
of civilization.

6
00:01:16,643 --> 00:01:19,942
People reconnect with their souls.

7
00:01:21,014 --> 00:01:23,039
They find their mojo.

8
00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:30,384
In Greece, it's called kefi,

9
00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:35,324
which means "passion, joy, spirit. "

10
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:39,958
Late!

11
00:01:41,234 --> 00:01:42,792
Goodbye, Genaki.

12
00:01:44,070 --> 00:01:47,039
In a week.
That window's stuck again.

13
00:01:47,140 --> 00:01:50,303
-Bravo. Where is the rent?
-I left it on the trapesi.

14
00:01:57,850 --> 00:02:02,000
Now, me, I love the beauty
and architecture of ancient Greece.

15
00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:06,185
But living in modern Greece
can be a bit frustrating.

16
00:02:07,393 --> 00:02:09,415
Sometimes things go fast.

17
00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:12,950
Most times,

18
00:02:15,768 --> 00:02:17,292
not so much.

19
00:02:17,937 --> 00:02:20,997
I came here a year ago to teach
at Athens University.

20
00:02:21,107 --> 00:02:25,669
Cutbacks left me without a job.
So now, for now,

21
00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:28,414
I work at Pangloss Tours.

22
00:02:28,515 --> 00:02:29,743
Georgia!

23
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,414
Oh, yeah. I've hit rock bottom.

24
00:02:39,225 --> 00:02:41,989
Georgia. Again you cut out beach day.

25
00:02:42,629 --> 00:02:44,688
They can go to the beach in any country.

26
00:02:44,797 --> 00:02:47,823
On my tour,
I teach them about ancient architecture.

27
00:02:47,934 --> 00:02:50,266
Nobody comes to Greece to learn.

28
00:02:50,770 --> 00:02:52,670
Maria, I disagree.

29
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,942
-It's open.
-You didn't get the job.

30
00:03:06,219 --> 00:03:08,153
Don't you read the evaluations?

31
00:03:08,254 --> 00:03:11,451
"What do you think of Georgia
as tour director?"

32
00:03:11,558 --> 00:03:15,153
"Average. Average. Average."

33
00:03:15,261 --> 00:03:16,785
So I'm average.

34
00:03:16,896 --> 00:03:18,864
Average is the lowest box you can check.

35
00:03:18,965 --> 00:03:20,956
Do you think we have
something that says, "Stinks"?

36
00:03:21,067 --> 00:03:23,399
And if we did, you'd be stinks.

37
00:03:23,503 --> 00:03:26,904
-"I find your tour boring."
-My tourists are boring.

38
00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:28,969
I think I've guided, like, 34 tours

39
00:03:29,075 --> 00:03:32,067
and you give me the same tourists
over and over again.

40
00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:35,807
Look! There they are.
The Tipsy Australians.

41
00:03:37,317 --> 00:03:40,377
-The Obnoxious Americans.
-It's called "rip-off."

42
00:03:41,654 --> 00:03:43,622
The Miserable Marriages.

43
00:03:44,457 --> 00:03:47,915
The Disgusted-With-Men-
But-Still-Looking Divorcees.

44
00:03:48,962 --> 00:03:51,897
-Stop!
-And, of course, The Old People.

45
00:03:52,398 --> 00:03:54,559
-I don't see Mr. Funny.
-Who?

46
00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:59,333
There's always one annoying guy
who thinks he's the life of the party.

47
00:04:00,540 --> 00:04:04,237
Canadians. Polite Canadians.

48
00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:05,641
-Can I have them?
-No.

49
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,804
They're in Group A. Nico's group.

50
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,474
Why does Nico always
get the good group?

51
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:13,074
His evaluations don't say, "Average."

52
00:04:14,687 --> 00:04:15,813
God!

53
00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:20,354
By the way,
Spiros eloped with that girl with no foot.

54
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:22,753
-Excellent.
-Why?

55
00:04:22,862 --> 00:04:26,389
-I'm being sarcastic.
-You're not funny. Stop trying.

56
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:30,536
-Who's my driver? Not Themio.
-Relax. He's in jail.

57
00:04:30,803 --> 00:04:33,135
You got the substitute. Procopi.

58
00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:35,736
The creepy, hairy, creepy guy?

59
00:04:36,542 --> 00:04:38,772
He's right behind me, isn't he?

60
00:04:42,548 --> 00:04:45,676
-Does he speak English?
-I don't know if he speaks anything.

61
00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:48,481
Maybe they caught a bear.
Taught it to drive.

62
00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:52,856
So I have rules. You cannot speed,

63
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:56,190
you cannot smoke
and you cannot eat while driving.

64
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,166
Great, he doesn't speak English.

65
00:05:03,469 --> 00:05:05,528
Don't forget to brush him.

66
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:09,965
-Maria! Maria!
-Nico! Nico!

67
00:05:12,845 --> 00:05:15,347
Hey, thank you for my group, eh?

68
00:05:16,015 --> 00:05:18,415
He bribes you for the good group?

69
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:19,746
-No.
-Yes.

70
00:05:29,729 --> 00:05:33,096
That girl. That girl has no kefi.

71
00:05:33,566 --> 00:05:36,091
What Greek does not have spirit, eh?

72
00:05:37,570 --> 00:05:39,003
Maybe she's half Greek.

73
00:05:39,105 --> 00:05:42,768
This was supposed to be temporary while
she looked for some big-shot teaching job.

74
00:05:42,875 --> 00:05:46,333
And now no one will hire her
and I am stuck with her.

75
00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:51,213
Hey, if I make her quit, can I have a raise?

76
00:05:51,651 --> 00:05:54,211
I don't want to know about it. Yes.

77
00:06:01,561 --> 00:06:04,724
-Group B! Group B, everyone.
-Hey!

78
00:06:04,831 --> 00:06:08,790
Group B, hello, I'm Georgia.
Welcome to Greece. I'm your tour guide.

79
00:06:08,901 --> 00:06:11,028
I'm Irv Giddeon,

80
00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:14,129
and I've come here to see
as many ancient ruins as possible.

81
00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:17,732
And judging from your husband,
the trip is already a success.

82
00:06:21,714 --> 00:06:24,080
There you are! And, indeed, funny.

83
00:06:25,585 --> 00:06:27,280
I'm killing me.

84
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,855
How many of you, like me, have come here

85
00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:32,925
to fondle as many nude statues
as possible?

86
00:06:33,025 --> 00:06:35,721
-Half the reason I came.
-Get your hand down.

87
00:06:35,828 --> 00:06:40,162
Jeez. This is comedy.
The Greeks invented it.

88
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:43,131
It's like mustaches on women.

89
00:06:44,837 --> 00:06:49,672
You know, we left Adelaide last night
with 17 pounds of frozen flake.

90
00:06:49,776 --> 00:06:51,607
30 hours later, she's right on the bugle.

91
00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:54,043
I'm giving it liquid yawns in the dunnies.

92
00:06:54,147 --> 00:06:55,671
-It was a shocker, Barry.
-Yeah.

93
00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:58,876
-Are they speaking words?
-Australians are the nicest people,

94
00:06:58,985 --> 00:07:01,249
but you can only understand
about half of what they say.

95
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:04,152
...a bad case of the trots
of last night's tucker.

96
00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:06,452
It's the last time I ate fish.

97
00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:11,728
Excuse me. Is this Pangloss Tours?

98
00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:13,862
Group B?

99
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:18,033
Sweet marble cake, she speaks American.
Come on, get it up now.

100
00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:19,171
Okay.

101
00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:23,135
-Okay, everybody, let's get on the bus.
-Oh, yes.

102
00:07:23,242 --> 00:07:25,870
Okay, Group B, got your tickets?
Follow me.

103
00:07:35,621 --> 00:07:36,849
Spooky.

104
00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:43,084
Okay. Now make sure that your luggage
is tagged and the driver will stow it.

105
00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:45,788
-Okay, you got me.
-Sorry.

106
00:07:45,898 --> 00:07:50,028
-That's okay. Dr. Tullen?
-Oh, no, no. I'm Mr., that's...

107
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:53,572
I am Dr. Tullen.
And this is our daughter, Caitlin.

108
00:07:53,673 --> 00:07:55,334
-Do smile, darling.
-I am.

109
00:07:55,441 --> 00:07:58,740
Hey, big fellow, how many bells
have you got on the old dickory?

110
00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:00,836
What the hell? What the hell is he saying?

111
00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:04,314
Oh, wake up, Australia.
He wants to know what time it is.

112
00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:05,714
-See, if it's...
-Here you go.

113
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:09,049
10 hours ahead here,
then that would make it...

114
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,483
Kimmy, what time is it back in the States?

115
00:08:11,591 --> 00:08:14,287
-The right time.
-Good one, Kimmy.

116
00:08:14,527 --> 00:08:17,496
Kim and AI Sawchuck. S-A-W-Chuck.

117
00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,258
-Come on, Al. Come on, Big Al.
-AI Sawchuck. How are you?

118
00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:20,457
-Okay. How are you?
-Let's go, Big Al.

119
00:08:20,566 --> 00:08:24,127
Okay, there you go. There you go.

120
00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:28,102
There's no smoking on the bus.

121
00:08:33,312 --> 00:08:35,371
-I have a question.
-Yeah.

122
00:08:35,948 --> 00:08:37,939
What's with the beekeeper?

123
00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:41,011
My wife needs protection from the sun.

124
00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,281
But we're not going to the sun.

125
00:08:44,590 --> 00:08:47,855
That man is so rude. Make it stop.

126
00:08:54,066 --> 00:08:56,591
Excuse me, ladies. Hey, there.

127
00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,927
I'm Marc Mallard. IHOP.

128
00:08:59,038 --> 00:09:01,905
That's the International House
of Pancakes.

129
00:09:02,675 --> 00:09:04,506
Did one of you lose this?

130
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:08,309
Thank you, Marc. I must have dropped it.

131
00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:12,179
It looks like a raspberry waffle.

132
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:15,812
-Or a tart.
-Or a tart.

133
00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:21,319
Hi. I'm Lena Mar�a Angustias
Teresa Fern�ndez de la Vega Rodr�guez.

134
00:09:21,427 --> 00:09:22,792
And she's Lala Cruz.

135
00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:24,760
-We're from Espa�a.
-Really?

136
00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:25,990
-Yeah.
-Yeah.

137
00:09:26,098 --> 00:09:29,659
-And we are both recently divorced.
-And off men.

138
00:09:32,605 --> 00:09:34,835
Hi. I'm Marc Mallard. IHOP.

139
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,933
Hello. Georgia Yanokoupolis.
Pangloss Tours.

140
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:41,410
-I'll see you on the bus.
-Okay.

141
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,648
Group B? Yes. Names.

142
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,987
You don't speak English, do you?

143
00:09:50,690 --> 00:09:52,681
And Maria gave you to me.

144
00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:57,725
Luggage this way.
And then you get on the bus.

145
00:09:57,830 --> 00:10:00,663
-Excuse me. I'm looking for the bus.
-Yeah.

146
00:10:01,701 --> 00:10:03,896
-This is it.
-Group B?

147
00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:07,169
-Oh, cool.
-Okay.

148
00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:09,701
Hey, Gator Phillips.

149
00:10:09,809 --> 00:10:14,473
-I'm from Florida, the States.
-You're traveling alone?

150
00:10:14,947 --> 00:10:18,508
No way, man.
I'm gonna meet my girlfriend in Greece.

151
00:10:19,018 --> 00:10:21,043
-We are in Greece.
-Now?

152
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:26,191
Right on. Thanks, man.

153
00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:29,025
-Okay, here you go.
-Is this free?

154
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:30,134
Yeah.

155
00:10:35,501 --> 00:10:38,231
Kalimera, everyone.
That's Greek for, "Good morning."

156
00:10:38,337 --> 00:10:41,898
Hello, beautiful people. I am Nico.

157
00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:44,909
For you, warm loucoumades.

158
00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:48,336
Oh, I'm so sorry. Wrong bus.

159
00:10:50,082 --> 00:10:52,414
-Hey, wait a minute...
-What the hell? Where's our donuts?

160
00:10:52,518 --> 00:10:53,507
What a rip!

161
00:10:53,619 --> 00:10:57,487
I'm gonna get... I could get you some later,
maybe. I'll look around.

162
00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:58,557
-Yeah...
-We should get something.

163
00:10:59,725 --> 00:11:00,692
Let's go.

164
00:11:01,594 --> 00:11:03,858
I mean, who needs the carbs, right?

165
00:11:03,963 --> 00:11:06,727
Not me. My ankles swell from the wheat.

166
00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:12,432
Okay, you might want to write this down.

167
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:17,808
In 1834, Athens became
the capital of modern Greece.

168
00:11:18,444 --> 00:11:22,403
Now, I'm not just a tour guide.
I am a professor of classical history.

169
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,107
Oh, great!
Are we gonna have a test now?

170
00:11:24,216 --> 00:11:27,014
So I'm going to teach you
all about the architecture

171
00:11:27,119 --> 00:11:29,110
and monuments of ancient Greece.

172
00:11:29,221 --> 00:11:32,156
-Like the propylea.
-Which is the word for donuts.

173
00:11:36,262 --> 00:11:38,753
-My name is Georgia.
-Louder, please.

174
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:41,162
-My name is Georgia.
-Yes, dear.

175
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:43,832
I'm Dorcas, Dorcas Wilmore.

176
00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:46,770
And this is my husband, Barnaby.

177
00:11:47,139 --> 00:11:50,597
Oh, I've got everyone a little souvenir.

178
00:11:51,010 --> 00:11:53,604
-To remember our trip together.
-All right.

179
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,841
-Oh, you shouldn't have.
-This must have cost you a shitload.

180
00:11:56,949 --> 00:11:58,883
Oh, no, it was nothing.

181
00:11:59,151 --> 00:12:01,915
Hand those around, would you, dear?

182
00:12:03,189 --> 00:12:06,158
Guide, this bus is really stuffy.

183
00:12:06,258 --> 00:12:09,819
-My daughter, Caitlin, needs fresh air.
-Okay, no problem.

184
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:22,431
-Turn it off!
-Oh, my God!

185
00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:28,374
Smells like death.

186
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,877
Sorry about that.

187
00:12:32,985 --> 00:12:34,885
-Angie?
-It's Georgia.

188
00:12:34,987 --> 00:12:38,286
Is the Sasquatch gonna be
with us the whole time?

189
00:12:38,991 --> 00:12:41,425
-He's the driver.
-What's his name?

190
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:44,893
Right. Everyone,
please say hello to Procopi.

191
00:12:44,997 --> 00:12:47,363
-Hey, Procopi.
-Hello, Procopi.

192
00:12:49,702 --> 00:12:53,160
Oh, I'm sorry. He has a nickname
he'd rather be known by.

193
00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:54,398
Poupi.

194
00:12:55,474 --> 00:12:56,600
Did he just say, "Poop"?

195
00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:59,405
Fair suck of the sav,
mate, I can't call you Poupi.

196
00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:00,536
What's your last name?

197
00:13:09,255 --> 00:13:10,620
It's Kakas.

198
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,567
They're laughing at your name.

199
00:13:22,868 --> 00:13:24,733
So what? Laughing is good.

200
00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:47,518
-Okay! Yeah.
-It's hot.

201
00:13:48,794 --> 00:13:51,456
Come, come, come.
I love you beautiful people.

202
00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:54,089
All right, everybody,
let's go this way. Come on.

203
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:58,136
Well, I have an exciting day planned.
But, first, listen.

204
00:13:58,237 --> 00:14:02,765
Whenever we stop the bus, whether it be
for restrooms or lunch or for touring,

205
00:14:02,875 --> 00:14:06,242
the driver or I will lock the bus. So you
can leave whatever you need in there.

206
00:14:06,345 --> 00:14:09,075
Cameras, sweaters, handbags, anything.

207
00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:11,547
-What about sweaters?
-Anything.

208
00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:13,174
-Handbags?
-Yes.

209
00:14:13,285 --> 00:14:14,752
Cameras, too?

210
00:14:15,154 --> 00:14:18,646
Cameras, too.
Anything, anytime, anywhere.

211
00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:23,061
-Anything.
-Come on, Barnaby. Come on.

212
00:14:23,162 --> 00:14:27,292
We are now walking through
the tholos. Say it with me? Anyone?

213
00:14:27,399 --> 00:14:30,334
Okay. The Greek word "agora "
means a place of gathering,

214
00:14:30,436 --> 00:14:33,303
and in ancient times,
this was the heart of Athenian life.

215
00:14:33,405 --> 00:14:35,669
Plato and Socrates taught philosophy here.

216
00:14:35,774 --> 00:14:37,366
-She still talking?
-It's hot.

217
00:14:37,476 --> 00:14:38,602
-Yes.
-Where can we get ice cream?

218
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,474
-Is there, like, a mini-mart around here?
-If you just...

219
00:14:40,579 --> 00:14:42,843
I thought this was
the ancient supermarket.

220
00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:44,540
-If you go back to...
-Come, come.

221
00:14:44,650 --> 00:14:47,414
I have a surprise for you. Look. Hey!

222
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,689
Come, beautiful people. Who wants to be
Zeus and Athena? Please, please, come.

223
00:14:50,789 --> 00:14:52,222
-Photo op here.
-Look, he's great.

224
00:14:52,324 --> 00:14:53,723
-Come on.
-Hey, can we do that?

225
00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:56,192
-I wish I was over there.
-That's cheesy.

226
00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:57,819
-That's the good group.
-I want to take a listen.

227
00:14:57,930 --> 00:15:00,831
There's a god with a camera. He's a very
clever god. He invented the camera.

228
00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:05,129
All right, we're going to
the Temple of Hephaestus now. This way.

229
00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:09,071
It's an exciting chapter in history.
Come on, everyone.

230
00:15:09,174 --> 00:15:11,768
I'd rather get my picture taken
as Zeus over there.

231
00:15:11,877 --> 00:15:14,573
It's this way. Come on.
I know it's hot.

232
00:15:17,716 --> 00:15:19,775
The Temple of Hephaestus,

233
00:15:19,885 --> 00:15:22,080
-built between 460 and 415...
-In the words of Big Kev, love...

234
00:15:22,187 --> 00:15:24,246
-We're excited!
-We're excited!

235
00:15:24,356 --> 00:15:26,517
-I'm not sure if they allow beer here.
-Okay, I'll finish it off.

236
00:15:26,625 --> 00:15:28,889
-Okay. There's a trash can over there.
-At last some excitement.

237
00:15:28,994 --> 00:15:31,292
Built between 460 and 415 B.C...

238
00:15:31,397 --> 00:15:34,366
This place looks just like
our Washington, D.C. IHOP.

239
00:15:34,466 --> 00:15:37,196
-No, actually, I'm sure it doesn't.
-Hey, Ange, hey, Ange! Ange!

240
00:15:37,336 --> 00:15:40,362
Al and his crew could have
this place fixed up in a couple of minutes.

241
00:15:40,472 --> 00:15:43,100
Dry wall, new roof, walk-in closets.

242
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:45,134
-Flip that house!
-Flip that house!

243
00:15:48,714 --> 00:15:50,477
That's a joke. I'm sure that's a joke,

244
00:15:50,582 --> 00:15:53,142
because making it new
would not make it more beautiful.

245
00:15:53,252 --> 00:15:55,914
The point is, it's ancient.

246
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,522
It's ancient. I mean, look at it.

247
00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:02,889
Isn't it magnificent?

248
00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:08,032
Come this way, beautiful people.
Nico puts the gloss into Pangloss. Yes?

249
00:16:08,567 --> 00:16:10,501
Now come around. Please, come around.
Thank you.

250
00:16:10,602 --> 00:16:14,003
So come around, please.
That's the temple there.

251
00:16:14,106 --> 00:16:16,006
-It's very nice, yes?
-Yes.

252
00:16:16,108 --> 00:16:19,168
Enough culture. Now, souvenirs, yes?

253
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:22,042
Who wants that temple made of soap?

254
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:25,742
-Temple on a rope, yeah?
-Me, please.

255
00:16:26,285 --> 00:16:27,980
No, no, that's not authentic.

256
00:16:28,087 --> 00:16:29,418
-You don't want that.
-We like those.

257
00:16:29,521 --> 00:16:32,513
Hey, Group B.
You want to come shopping with Nico?

258
00:16:32,624 --> 00:16:34,285
Nico, what are you doing?

259
00:16:34,393 --> 00:16:35,883
No, Group B, you're with me.

260
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:38,862
I've an hour of shopping
scheduled on Day 4.

261
00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:42,258
-This way, hon.
-We got everything, my friend.

262
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:46,270
Come this way, follow the pretty ladies.
Hey, beautiful ladies!

263
00:16:46,372 --> 00:16:48,863
Meet back at the bus in 40 minutes.

264
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:55,003
Standing in the middle
of culture and history,

265
00:16:55,614 --> 00:17:00,449
and they want a 50-50 poly-cotton blend
T-shirt with a picture of a Trojan horse.

266
00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,823
Why am I spending my life
showing tourists

267
00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:15,593
gorgeous ancient ruins
they care nothing about?

268
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:20,035
And Pangloss Tours pays lousy.
They book the worst hotel rooms.

269
00:17:20,139 --> 00:17:23,540
I don't have any friends here.
I actually don't know anybody.

270
00:17:23,642 --> 00:17:26,202
Really, I haven't had sex in forever.

271
00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:29,776
-Forever is a long time.
-Yeah.

272
00:17:34,987 --> 00:17:37,114
-You speak English.
-Yes.

273
00:17:37,222 --> 00:17:38,712
I do, too.

274
00:17:40,092 --> 00:17:41,491
42 euros.

275
00:17:42,361 --> 00:17:44,852
That's great. Anybody else?

276
00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:51,267
Excellent. Excuse me. Nice to meet you.
Excuse me. Bye.

277
00:17:52,971 --> 00:17:55,633
-You must think I'm crazy.
-Yes.

278
00:17:56,608 --> 00:17:59,736
Fair enough. Why would you not tell me?

279
00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:04,310
I thought you needed to talk.
I have 3 sisters. So talk.

280
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:08,818
Do you ever question
what you're doing with your life?

281
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,821
-No.
-What?

282
00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:14,216
-Talk more about the no sex.
-I'm good, thanks.

283
00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:17,796
You don't question? Come on,
Greece is the land of philosophers.

284
00:18:17,896 --> 00:18:21,354
Yes. But that is their job.
My job is to drive the bus.

285
00:18:21,467 --> 00:18:23,230
You know, it pays better.

286
00:18:23,335 --> 00:18:25,530
Come on. You don't have a life plan?

287
00:18:25,637 --> 00:18:27,764
-How do you plan life?
-What?

288
00:18:29,641 --> 00:18:32,508
Come on.
We'll get some coffee and you can talk.

289
00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:34,238
What? We're working.

290
00:18:34,346 --> 00:18:36,337
Everyone should take the time for a coffee.

291
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:39,645
That is the typical Greek mentality.

292
00:18:39,985 --> 00:18:42,647
Woman. Where's your kefi?

293
00:18:42,988 --> 00:18:45,081
-I have kefi. I have lots of kefi.
-No.

294
00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:47,249
-No, you don't. No.
-Yes, I do.

295
00:18:47,359 --> 00:18:50,089
That's why you're so uptight and skinny.

296
00:18:51,396 --> 00:18:52,556
Skinny?

297
00:18:55,267 --> 00:18:57,861
Look, we're late, so no coffee. Hey.

298
00:18:58,003 --> 00:19:00,995
Everybody in Nico's group
has nice vacation.

299
00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:02,568
You want to have relation with me?

300
00:19:03,375 --> 00:19:05,434
What's that postcard there?

301
00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:10,106
Which one? Which side
do you want? The one up above or this one?

302
00:19:10,883 --> 00:19:13,078
Oh, that's nice. Good.

303
00:19:16,288 --> 00:19:17,585
Group B!

304
00:19:19,091 --> 00:19:20,388
Group B!

305
00:19:21,026 --> 00:19:22,891
Gather up, Group B.

306
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:26,260
Well, we're a little behind schedule.
A lot. So...

307
00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:28,629
I picked up something
that we can eat on the bus.

308
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:30,998
And it is a special treat.

309
00:19:31,336 --> 00:19:33,167
-What is that?
-It's souvlaki.

310
00:19:33,272 --> 00:19:36,400
-It's meat on a stick.
-What kind of meat is that?

311
00:19:36,642 --> 00:19:38,041
It looks like poodle.

312
00:19:39,278 --> 00:19:41,212
-That's not right.
-It's not poodle.

313
00:19:41,313 --> 00:19:45,079
Hey. Hey, come to the Hard Rock Cafe.
It's very Greek.

314
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:47,015
-Dude, Hard Rock!
-Come! Come on.

315
00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:49,246
Chicken fingers and French fries!

316
00:19:50,889 --> 00:19:52,083
No, no.

317
00:19:53,559 --> 00:19:55,894
I have souvlaki.
Why would you want to... That...

318
00:19:55,894 --> 00:19:56,383
I have souvlaki.
Why would you want to... That...

319
00:19:56,528 --> 00:19:58,621
Yeah. Get a Greek salad.

320
00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:02,364
Hard Rock.
Doesn't sound very Greek to me.

321
00:20:04,937 --> 00:20:09,704
-Hi, it's Caitlin, right? Having fun?
-No.

322
00:20:10,876 --> 00:20:13,709
-Well, what are you listening to?
-Nothing.

323
00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:17,912
-When are we going to the beach?
-That's not on my itinerary.

324
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,241
Of course not. This sucks.

325
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,415
Sorry about that.

326
00:20:23,522 --> 00:20:27,720
My daughter's chronically unhappy.
It's not her fault. It's a genetic thing.

327
00:20:27,859 --> 00:20:29,520
Hansdorf syndrome.

328
00:20:30,495 --> 00:20:32,554
Mr. Tullen, I'm so sorry.

329
00:20:43,208 --> 00:20:45,108
Okay, let's learn some more Greek.

330
00:20:45,210 --> 00:20:49,169
Kalispera, kalispera, everyone.
That's Greek for, "Good evening."

331
00:20:50,649 --> 00:20:52,116
Can you say it with me?

332
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:58,245
Wow. Are you sure you're not Greek?

333
00:21:27,853 --> 00:21:29,286
Hey, Georgia.

334
00:21:36,495 --> 00:21:40,226
I'm sorry. I got sunblock in my eye.
Do you have any drops?

335
00:21:40,565 --> 00:21:41,623
I do.

336
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:04,546
This way, please. Beautiful people.
Ladies and gentlemen, this way, please.

337
00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:06,385
What is this place?

338
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:09,090
Hey, hey, hey, Georgia, Georgia.

339
00:22:09,928 --> 00:22:12,396
-You're staying there?
-Aren't you?

340
00:22:12,698 --> 00:22:16,361
No way! Great hotel. Best chain in Greece.

341
00:22:17,569 --> 00:22:19,662
This way, please, Canadians.

342
00:22:20,806 --> 00:22:22,797
Everybody got your luggage?

343
00:22:22,908 --> 00:22:24,808
Wow. What a dump.

344
00:22:26,912 --> 00:22:30,541
Only about 3 at a time are
gonna fit in this elevator.

345
00:22:30,782 --> 00:22:34,343
Oh, Al, honey. We gotta get to the room.
I'm ovulating. Like, now.

346
00:22:34,453 --> 00:22:38,412
Kimmy, you know I can't perform
on command like that. That's not natural.

347
00:22:39,925 --> 00:22:41,256
Get into them. It's duck's guts.

348
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:44,022
Crack open a tinny, love. After all
that yakking, you must be bloody thirsty.

349
00:22:44,696 --> 00:22:45,958
Actually, I'm a lightweight.

350
00:22:46,064 --> 00:22:49,625
One drink and I'm looking
for a bellman to make out with.

351
00:22:50,902 --> 00:22:53,530
-That was a joke.
-You're not funny.

352
00:22:54,106 --> 00:22:55,437
I've heard.

353
00:22:59,111 --> 00:23:01,944
Just a converter?
Yeah, that's no problem at all.

354
00:23:02,047 --> 00:23:04,242
Okay, I can get you water,
and do you need anything?

355
00:23:06,518 --> 00:23:07,644
Here we go. Okay.

356
00:23:07,753 --> 00:23:10,187
Come on, Barnaby. That's right. In you go.

357
00:23:10,288 --> 00:23:11,778
There you go.

358
00:23:43,588 --> 00:23:46,148
Your elevator is broken.

359
00:23:47,392 --> 00:23:48,882
Anthony Quinn.

360
00:23:58,904 --> 00:24:00,997
We have to take the stairs.

361
00:24:03,308 --> 00:24:05,742
-Why?
-Because it's Greece.

362
00:24:09,014 --> 00:24:11,744
In the movie Zorba the Greek, the scene
where Alan Bates and Anthony Quinn

363
00:24:11,850 --> 00:24:15,217
have just lost all their life savings.
What do they do? They dance.

364
00:24:17,322 --> 00:24:20,348
That's the way this whole country works.
Or doesn't.

365
00:24:20,459 --> 00:24:21,687
If the shower doesn't work...

366
00:24:22,928 --> 00:24:24,054
I'm sorry.

367
00:24:24,930 --> 00:24:25,988
...they dance.

368
00:24:26,097 --> 00:24:28,531
Or you want a little privacy,

369
00:24:31,703 --> 00:24:33,034
they dance.

370
00:24:33,472 --> 00:24:37,465
I'm very sorry. I'm very sorry.
Not that sorry.

371
00:24:38,009 --> 00:24:40,477
Or, God forbid, the toilet breaks...

372
00:24:42,814 --> 00:24:44,839
Oh, flapjacks.

373
00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:46,679
...you get the Greek philosophy.

374
00:24:46,785 --> 00:24:48,912
"Relax, pee outside.

375
00:24:49,020 --> 00:24:51,955
"Maybe it is your destiny
to write a poem about the sky."

376
00:24:52,824 --> 00:24:54,621
And then they dance.

377
00:24:56,228 --> 00:25:00,858
You know, Greece was
a happening place 2,500 years ago.

378
00:25:01,266 --> 00:25:04,201
It was the birthplace of art
and democracy and philosophy.

379
00:25:04,302 --> 00:25:06,668
And then they discovered the nap.

380
00:25:13,578 --> 00:25:17,344
This country's disregard for rules
and order is just sloppy.

381
00:25:20,952 --> 00:25:23,785
What is with this hair? Is it a full moon?

382
00:25:26,992 --> 00:25:32,555
You know, you've all just got to get
your act together and stop dancing.

383
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,291
Where's my fleabag of a room?

384
00:25:45,143 --> 00:25:46,474
It's fixed.

385
00:25:54,486 --> 00:25:55,544
Yeah.

386
00:26:34,459 --> 00:26:35,687
Now what?

387
00:26:41,933 --> 00:26:44,367
-Maria!
-Georgia, darling.

388
00:26:44,469 --> 00:26:46,096
I'm up to my ears in work here.

389
00:26:46,204 --> 00:26:49,640
Greece has
the most beautiful accommodation.

390
00:26:51,076 --> 00:26:53,044
Like, first-class hotels with, like,

391
00:26:53,144 --> 00:26:54,975
your own swimming pool in your room.

392
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,275
How do you find these crappy joints?

393
00:26:57,382 --> 00:26:58,974
Lucky I find somewhere.

394
00:26:59,084 --> 00:27:01,314
Yeah, you try finding a hotel
on the budget.

395
00:27:01,419 --> 00:27:02,613
Maria...

396
00:27:08,860 --> 00:27:10,487
Dear Maria,

397
00:27:11,963 --> 00:27:16,229
you are my only friend in Greece.
And you bite the big one.

398
00:27:17,469 --> 00:27:19,027
After this tour,

399
00:27:23,008 --> 00:27:24,202
I quit.

400
00:27:27,078 --> 00:27:28,545
Love, Georgia.

401
00:27:33,318 --> 00:27:36,253
Breakfast is on negative one,
down one floor.

402
00:27:36,554 --> 00:27:37,816
Oh, cool.

403
00:27:42,761 --> 00:27:45,662
Would you please mail this for me?
Certified.

404
00:27:46,765 --> 00:27:51,395
-I am on my coffee break.
-Of course. Look, I have to go.

405
00:28:09,154 --> 00:28:12,214
-11 euros.
-What? That's like $20.

406
00:28:13,024 --> 00:28:17,757
You know, there are other ways to pay.

407
00:28:30,842 --> 00:28:32,571
Does that ever work?

408
00:28:33,745 --> 00:28:37,237
How many women have
actually slept with you for postage?

409
00:28:40,418 --> 00:28:41,476
4.

410
00:28:44,289 --> 00:28:45,756
I'll just pay.

411
00:29:16,454 --> 00:29:19,787
So we have here a beautiful church.
It's very Greek.

412
00:29:20,125 --> 00:29:23,993
But you have ice creams, so we skip. Yes?

413
00:29:24,095 --> 00:29:25,653
-Yeah.
-Okay, souvenirs, yes?

414
00:29:25,764 --> 00:29:27,561
-Yeah!
-You like the vacation so far?

415
00:29:27,899 --> 00:29:30,299
...rocks cut in the Byzantine era.

416
00:29:31,636 --> 00:29:34,730
There are references to this church
in a very old document

417
00:29:34,839 --> 00:29:37,239
called the Praktikon of Athens.

418
00:29:37,342 --> 00:29:39,742
Take a glance and look around
at some of the murals.

419
00:29:39,844 --> 00:29:44,406
The oldest parts of St. Marina's date back
to the 11th to 12th century B.C.

420
00:29:49,220 --> 00:29:52,815
Anybody else want a pamphlet?
Anybody? Want a pamphlet?

421
00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:55,525
Yes. Of course not.

422
00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:58,027
Kimmy, do you see what I see?

423
00:30:01,833 --> 00:30:05,360
That would be a great place for snacks
in the rec room.

424
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:10,799
-Do you think it's for sale?
-Everything's got its price.

425
00:30:11,376 --> 00:30:13,469
Let's go find that preacher.

426
00:30:14,512 --> 00:30:16,377
I think they call him a rabbi here.

427
00:30:16,481 --> 00:30:18,915
We have to have photographs
so people will believe we were here.

428
00:30:19,017 --> 00:30:20,814
Who won't believe we were here?

429
00:30:20,919 --> 00:30:23,217
Well, Donald and Peggy for a start. What?

430
00:30:23,321 --> 00:30:25,585
Why don't you all get in there?

431
00:30:25,690 --> 00:30:27,248
Oh, that's very good of you.
Thank you very much.

432
00:30:27,358 --> 00:30:28,347
You're welcome.

433
00:30:28,459 --> 00:30:29,687
He's going to take
our photograph.

434
00:30:29,794 --> 00:30:31,489
Okay, here we go.

435
00:30:33,031 --> 00:30:36,523
1, 2, 3.

436
00:30:37,468 --> 00:30:40,028
4, 5, 6...

437
00:30:40,138 --> 00:30:41,469
Sorry, how high are you going?

438
00:30:41,573 --> 00:30:44,667
I'm going to keep counting
until the kid cracks a smile.

439
00:30:44,776 --> 00:30:48,143
Forgot where I left off. Gotta start again.

440
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:49,874
1, 2...

441
00:30:49,981 --> 00:30:52,347
Just take the picture, you idiot.

442
00:30:56,654 --> 00:30:58,417
There you go, kiddo.

443
00:31:01,092 --> 00:31:02,559
Oh, my God!

444
00:31:03,361 --> 00:31:04,623
Georgia!

445
00:31:06,731 --> 00:31:09,256
Hey, Poupi, if anybody's looking...
When did you shave?

446
00:31:09,367 --> 00:31:13,269
-Never mind. I'm not here, okay? I'm just...
-Georgia. Georgia.

447
00:31:13,371 --> 00:31:15,635
I cannot put up with that twit any longer.

448
00:31:15,740 --> 00:31:18,504
-Why not? I have to.
-Now you're being rude.

449
00:31:18,610 --> 00:31:21,977
Yes, fine, I'm rude and boring
and not funny. Yes, I know!

450
00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:25,880
If you keep that tone with me,
I shall be forced to call your superiors.

451
00:31:25,984 --> 00:31:27,713
Okay, you know what?

452
00:31:27,819 --> 00:31:30,219
If you have a grievance, use these.

453
00:31:30,321 --> 00:31:33,347
-Your evaluation forms. Take one.
-Don't think I won't.

454
00:31:33,458 --> 00:31:35,517
I usually hand these out
at the end of the trip.

455
00:31:35,627 --> 00:31:38,152
But this will give you 4 more days
to complain about me.

456
00:31:38,263 --> 00:31:40,288
Hey, hand them out to everybody.

457
00:31:40,398 --> 00:31:42,423
What's Greek for "bipolar"?

458
00:31:44,836 --> 00:31:48,363
Hey. Enough. Your jokes aren't funny.

459
00:31:51,009 --> 00:31:54,775
You know, my wife and I have
taken tours for 20 years.

460
00:31:55,346 --> 00:31:58,076
This one, gotta be the worst.

461
00:31:58,182 --> 00:31:59,581
Here we go again. Yeah, yeah,

462
00:31:59,684 --> 00:32:03,211
-I know, yeah, I stink, I wrecked Greece.
-It's the worst because my wife is not here.

463
00:32:03,321 --> 00:32:05,687
-And it's just not the same.
-Well, you know what? If I were her,

464
00:32:05,823 --> 00:32:07,347
I wouldn't be here with you, either.

465
00:32:07,458 --> 00:32:10,621
I'm sure she's spending her vacation
somewhere...

466
00:32:22,407 --> 00:32:23,931
I'm so sorry.

467
00:32:44,395 --> 00:32:47,125
You know what?
I think we should just go shopping.

468
00:32:47,231 --> 00:32:50,758
-Lovely. Just what we wanted, wasn't it?
-Okay.

469
00:32:51,469 --> 00:32:53,801
-Nice bit of shopping.
-I can finish this later.

470
00:32:54,238 --> 00:32:56,934
-I know a good place for shopping.
-Fine.

471
00:33:00,912 --> 00:33:02,641
Look at this stuff.

472
00:33:04,282 --> 00:33:05,874
No, no, no.

473
00:33:10,355 --> 00:33:11,322
Peekaboo!

474
00:33:15,760 --> 00:33:16,727
Do you like the gold?

475
00:33:17,528 --> 00:33:18,517
I love that.

476
00:33:18,629 --> 00:33:22,929
She doesn't have any arms so she makes
up for it by showing her breasts, honey.

477
00:33:23,034 --> 00:33:24,023
Really?

478
00:33:32,610 --> 00:33:34,441
Eat hearty, men.

479
00:33:34,545 --> 00:33:38,037
-For tonight we dine in Greece!
-In Greece!

480
00:33:45,223 --> 00:33:47,248
-What was his name?
-Who?

481
00:33:48,593 --> 00:33:50,458
When it's over,
some women cut their hair.

482
00:33:50,561 --> 00:33:52,529
Some women run away to Greece. So...

483
00:33:52,630 --> 00:33:55,758
I did not move to Greece
because of some man.

484
00:33:56,601 --> 00:33:59,069
-Why? Who'd you shave for?
-Georgia!

485
00:34:00,038 --> 00:34:01,164
Georgia, come here,
come here, come here!

486
00:34:01,272 --> 00:34:03,763
I don't think I like
what's going on around here.

487
00:34:06,177 --> 00:34:08,270
Georgia! We need you. Just, real...
We need you!

488
00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:10,745
-Okay.
-What did you call my wife?

489
00:34:11,516 --> 00:34:12,744
What's going on? What's going on?

490
00:34:12,850 --> 00:34:17,082
Look, this guy here is charging everybody
else one price for the dingle nut

491
00:34:17,188 --> 00:34:21,022
and he's charging me and my wife
2 extra euros. That's what, fellow.

492
00:34:21,125 --> 00:34:22,615
It's just cultural interaction.

493
00:34:22,727 --> 00:34:26,219
He offers you a price and then
he expects you to offer him a price back.

494
00:34:26,330 --> 00:34:28,730
You know, it's just... It's called bargaining.

495
00:34:28,833 --> 00:34:31,666
-It's called "rip-off."
-Thank you very much.

496
00:34:34,105 --> 00:34:36,630
-What did he just call me?
-No, no, no. He wants me to translate.

497
00:34:37,809 --> 00:34:41,540
You fat tourists.

498
00:34:41,646 --> 00:34:43,307
My tourist friends.

499
00:34:43,414 --> 00:34:45,939
I could give you idiots

500
00:34:46,050 --> 00:34:48,484
authentic Greek items made
by my grandmother.

501
00:34:48,586 --> 00:34:52,784
He could give you handmade authentic
items made by his grandmother.

502
00:34:53,091 --> 00:34:56,458
But you dummies
want this cheap crap.

503
00:34:56,561 --> 00:34:58,028
You have good taste.

504
00:34:58,129 --> 00:35:00,063
This junk is made in Korea.

505
00:35:00,164 --> 00:35:01,392
Things are made in Corinth.

506
00:35:01,499 --> 00:35:02,989
By prisoners.

507
00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:04,534
By friends.

508
00:35:04,635 --> 00:35:05,829
For you, I'll double the price.

509
00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:07,165
I can make you a good price.

510
00:35:07,271 --> 00:35:09,967
Yeah, that's what we want
right there, fellow.

511
00:35:10,074 --> 00:35:12,508
And to your guide, a kickback.

512
00:35:12,610 --> 00:35:13,599
What?

513
00:35:13,711 --> 00:35:15,941
Kick back and enjoy your stay.

514
00:35:16,514 --> 00:35:17,742
-Okay?
-Okay.

515
00:35:17,849 --> 00:35:18,816
How much do you want for it?

516
00:35:18,916 --> 00:35:20,144
20 euros.

517
00:35:20,251 --> 00:35:21,275
20 euros.

518
00:35:21,385 --> 00:35:23,910
-Is that good?
-Yeah, now that sounds more reasonable.

519
00:35:24,021 --> 00:35:25,181
-Okay.
-Okay.

520
00:35:25,289 --> 00:35:26,654
Okay. Okay.

521
00:35:34,432 --> 00:35:36,866
-Nobody touches Big Al's hottie.
-Thank you.

522
00:35:36,968 --> 00:35:38,868
-Dirty greaseball.
-Bye.

523
00:35:41,272 --> 00:35:43,035
How much are these?

524
00:35:43,141 --> 00:35:47,510
Oh, good heavens. They're far too
expensive. Can't possibly afford that.

525
00:35:54,285 --> 00:35:57,083
Oh, yeah, we're getting checked out, dude.

526
00:35:57,455 --> 00:36:00,015
-Really?
-Yeah, the Spanish divorcees.

527
00:36:00,925 --> 00:36:05,021
It's only a matter of time before
they start coming around. Hello.

528
00:36:06,230 --> 00:36:08,164
-Dude, behind you.
-What?

529
00:36:09,634 --> 00:36:12,728
They're checking out
the community shower thing.

530
00:36:14,205 --> 00:36:16,366
It's like 4th of July
at Elton John's house.

531
00:36:16,474 --> 00:36:18,408
Okay. They want a show?

532
00:36:18,509 --> 00:36:21,945
Let's show the Spaniards
a little American showmanship.

533
00:36:42,967 --> 00:36:45,993
It doesn't count
if you're on vacation, right?

534
00:36:49,140 --> 00:36:51,836
What is it with tourists and ice cream?

535
00:36:51,943 --> 00:36:55,504
They had some this morning,
then again after lunch,

536
00:36:56,113 --> 00:36:59,708
and now again with the $4 cones.
I don't get it. You, too?

537
00:37:02,153 --> 00:37:05,054
-No, thank you.
-This for you to give to him.

538
00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,461
Okay, fine.

539
00:37:24,375 --> 00:37:26,240
I sort of got you this.

540
00:37:27,778 --> 00:37:29,609
Thanks, but no thanks.

541
00:37:36,020 --> 00:37:37,510
That is tasty.

542
00:37:53,671 --> 00:37:55,832
I'm sorry about this morning.

543
00:38:01,345 --> 00:38:04,872
You know, I was a much nicer guy
when my wife was alive.

544
00:38:06,584 --> 00:38:08,518
She died 3 years ago.

545
00:38:09,820 --> 00:38:13,847
She used to say to me,
"They don't know you're kidding, Irv."

546
00:38:16,093 --> 00:38:20,496
She would say, "You're not as funny
as you think you are," just like you.

547
00:38:22,266 --> 00:38:24,666
It's nice you had a good marriage.

548
00:38:25,102 --> 00:38:26,763
We fought every day.

549
00:38:27,705 --> 00:38:30,333
I took her to Egypt. We fought all day

550
00:38:30,775 --> 00:38:35,872
about whether the pyramids
were "majestic" or "magnificent."

551
00:38:38,783 --> 00:38:40,216
It was magic.

552
00:38:42,553 --> 00:38:44,350
28 years.

553
00:38:45,423 --> 00:38:49,689
I woke up every day smiling.

554
00:38:51,095 --> 00:38:54,155
-I could live with that.
-You got the potential.

555
00:38:54,765 --> 00:38:58,929
All you gotta do is let it happen.
You know, relax. Open up.

556
00:39:00,137 --> 00:39:03,197
-I'm open.
-You're open? Look at you.

557
00:39:03,974 --> 00:39:07,034
You're as tight as my Aunt Gladys' ass.

558
00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:10,742
-Hey.
-Open up. Open.

559
00:39:12,883 --> 00:39:16,842
-Be alert. Be like...
-Like this. Like this?

560
00:39:18,122 --> 00:39:20,556
Okay. I'm open, yay!

561
00:39:21,759 --> 00:39:23,158
Oh, no, no!

562
00:39:24,128 --> 00:39:26,790
Come on, Irv, look what you made me do.

563
00:39:28,899 --> 00:39:32,232
-Okay, that's a keeper.
-Okay. So here's what we do.

564
00:39:32,336 --> 00:39:35,567
You get some kerosene.
You pour it on the stain.

565
00:39:35,673 --> 00:39:37,698
-Yeah.
-Keep it there for about an hour.

566
00:39:38,909 --> 00:39:42,380
And then you light that sucker on fire
and buy something nice.

567
00:39:42,380 --> 00:39:43,278
And then you light that sucker on fire
and buy something nice.

568
00:39:43,948 --> 00:39:46,542
All right. I have to gather the group.

569
00:39:47,952 --> 00:39:50,443
-We're good?
-We're better.

570
00:39:52,289 --> 00:39:53,347
Okay.

571
00:39:56,193 --> 00:39:58,627
Group B! Group B, everybody.

572
00:39:59,130 --> 00:40:03,191
Everybody. I hope everyone enjoyed their
ice cream. I ate some. I'm wearing some.

573
00:40:03,300 --> 00:40:05,894
Let's get on the bus and sweat it off.

574
00:40:06,771 --> 00:40:09,205
Has anybody seen Dorcas? Anybody?

575
00:40:09,540 --> 00:40:11,735
All right. We'll wait for her.

576
00:40:25,456 --> 00:40:29,483
I'd like to apologize for
my unprofessional attitude this morning.

577
00:40:29,794 --> 00:40:34,026
Have you ever had one of those days?
Actually, it's been about a year.

578
00:40:34,331 --> 00:40:36,094
-Yes, Irv.
-Me, too.

579
00:40:36,634 --> 00:40:40,468
I would like to apologize to everybody.
It was my medication.

580
00:40:40,571 --> 00:40:43,301
I take Preparation H, 'cause I'm an asshole.

581
00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:47,737
Wait for me. Thank you, Georgie.

582
00:40:47,878 --> 00:40:52,076
I'm the last one. Okay, Poupi, let's go.
I'm spent!

583
00:40:53,317 --> 00:40:55,376
I got these for you, girls.

584
00:40:56,187 --> 00:41:00,123
-It's too much.
-No. They cost nothing.

585
00:41:07,531 --> 00:41:09,260
Drive, Poupi, drive!

586
00:41:16,740 --> 00:41:19,800
Hey! Who's seen the Olympics on TV?

587
00:41:23,180 --> 00:41:26,911
Well, we're going to Olympia,
the site of the very first Olympics.

588
00:41:27,017 --> 00:41:29,679
The ancient games began in 776 B.C.

589
00:41:30,254 --> 00:41:32,154
Now, all through the era of the Pisatans...

590
00:41:32,256 --> 00:41:35,453
Flapjack, you want to race me
Michael Johnson style?

591
00:41:35,559 --> 00:41:37,959
...the Olympic games took place
every 5 years.

592
00:41:39,196 --> 00:41:40,527
Here's something interesting.

593
00:41:40,631 --> 00:41:44,362
Until they were abolished
from 393 until 426 A.D.

594
00:41:45,436 --> 00:41:47,199
And then in 1896...

595
00:41:49,006 --> 00:41:52,066
Well, that's about the year
I started to stink.

596
00:42:07,224 --> 00:42:10,523
I know every fact and every figure
about this place.

597
00:42:10,928 --> 00:42:14,056
I mean, I love it here.
And they just want to have fun.

598
00:42:14,164 --> 00:42:16,689
And I get it,
but I don't know how to make this job fun.

599
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:19,564
Well, if you call it a job, it ain't fun.

600
00:42:20,104 --> 00:42:24,165
I mean, look at porn stars. They get to
schtup all day. They should be happy.

601
00:42:24,275 --> 00:42:26,937
You never hear about a happy porn star.

602
00:42:27,044 --> 00:42:30,138
I had the best job in the whole world.

603
00:42:32,316 --> 00:42:34,079
You were a porn star?

604
00:42:37,821 --> 00:42:40,915
-No, really, were you?
-I was an ice-cream taster.

605
00:42:41,025 --> 00:42:43,960
-Get out.
-35 years.

606
00:42:44,595 --> 00:42:48,292
-I wish I had that job.
-That's what my friends used to say.

607
00:42:49,033 --> 00:42:53,060
But then Elinor got sick.

608
00:42:55,372 --> 00:42:57,772
I had to take care of her and...

609
00:42:58,943 --> 00:43:01,434
She always wanted to come to Greece.

610
00:43:05,950 --> 00:43:10,444
Hey. Yesterday, I quit. This is my last tour.

611
00:43:13,958 --> 00:43:16,859
Well, it's my last tour, too.

612
00:43:20,764 --> 00:43:25,701
Georgie! How did these columns fall over?

613
00:43:26,236 --> 00:43:28,704
Well, there were 2 earthquakes
in the 5th and 6th century...

614
00:43:31,809 --> 00:43:35,870
The columns fell over from the incredible
pull of Ulysses' love.

615
00:43:37,381 --> 00:43:39,246
Isn't that sweet?

616
00:43:42,386 --> 00:43:44,115
-Better.
-Better?

617
00:43:44,221 --> 00:43:46,712
Looks like a short stack fell over.

618
00:43:47,224 --> 00:43:48,748
Come on, Barnaby.

619
00:43:55,933 --> 00:43:58,868
Hey, does everybody know
about the Olympic torch?

620
00:43:58,969 --> 00:44:00,493
This way. Come on, this way.

621
00:44:00,604 --> 00:44:04,165
Okay. That flame that you saw
being passed around the world

622
00:44:04,274 --> 00:44:07,072
is first lit by a reflection from the sun.

623
00:44:07,778 --> 00:44:11,214
All right, now, this is the palestra.

624
00:44:11,982 --> 00:44:14,780
This is where the athletes would wrestle.

625
00:44:34,271 --> 00:44:35,465
What?

626
00:44:35,572 --> 00:44:38,735
Do you need anything?
Medicine or anything at all?

627
00:44:39,109 --> 00:44:40,576
Doing okay? Hey!

628
00:44:43,113 --> 00:44:46,640
-You really are listening to nothing.
-The battery died.

629
00:44:47,317 --> 00:44:49,148
We forgot the charger.

630
00:44:50,688 --> 00:44:52,280
This trip sucks.

631
00:44:53,424 --> 00:44:54,618
Caitlin?

632
00:44:56,260 --> 00:44:58,956
It's okay. And I understand.

633
00:44:59,730 --> 00:45:02,392
-What is it you understand?
-Oh, well...

634
00:45:03,033 --> 00:45:05,501
-The genetic thing.
-What thing?

635
00:45:06,103 --> 00:45:08,571
Sorry, your husband told me
about the thing

636
00:45:08,672 --> 00:45:11,038
that makes your daughter prickly.

637
00:45:12,042 --> 00:45:13,737
Hansdorf syndrome.

638
00:45:17,514 --> 00:45:22,008
Hansdorf is my maiden name.

639
00:45:27,091 --> 00:45:28,922
That's a coincidence.

640
00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:31,320
Stuart.

641
00:45:31,562 --> 00:45:33,689
How dare you insult me
in front of that woman?

642
00:45:33,797 --> 00:45:35,230
It was a joke, dear. Good heavens!

643
00:45:35,332 --> 00:45:37,527
-How could you possibly say...
-Why don't you just lighten up?

644
00:46:00,390 --> 00:46:03,325
Beautiful ladies,
don't forget to smash the plates.

645
00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:05,019
-Yeah?
-Very Greek.

646
00:46:05,129 --> 00:46:06,892
Everybody. Everybody.

647
00:46:07,264 --> 00:46:10,097
The newspaper says
it's gonna rain tomorrow.

648
00:46:12,102 --> 00:46:13,364
And the good part is?

649
00:46:13,470 --> 00:46:16,371
If we all think good thoughts,
maybe we'll get some nice weather.

650
00:46:16,473 --> 00:46:17,565
Are you listening, God?

651
00:46:17,674 --> 00:46:20,268
You don't have to shout,
I'm sitting right here.

652
00:46:20,377 --> 00:46:24,677
<i>* Blue skies shining on me</i>

653
00:46:26,383 --> 00:46:27,350
1, 2, 3!

654
00:46:29,586 --> 00:46:30,610
No!

655
00:46:31,088 --> 00:46:32,385
-Here you go.
-Come on!

656
00:46:32,489 --> 00:46:34,423
No, no, no!

657
00:46:35,559 --> 00:46:39,427
I'm ever so sorry,
but that Nico said it was a Greek tradition.

658
00:46:40,230 --> 00:46:42,289
-It's okay.
-Okay.

659
00:46:44,268 --> 00:46:46,395
Kimmy, stop doing the dishes
and get over here.

660
00:46:46,503 --> 00:46:48,835
Sue, bung your Khy Pass over here,
have a crack at the foosball.

661
00:46:51,175 --> 00:46:53,837
-10 euros.
-Don't worry. Leave it to me.

662
00:46:57,047 --> 00:47:01,450
I say, that was ever such fun.
We did enjoy it. You are wonderful.

663
00:47:01,552 --> 00:47:04,316
Hello. Hello, lovely lady. Thank you.

664
00:47:05,055 --> 00:47:06,454
Silly twit.

665
00:47:10,861 --> 00:47:14,592
Dorcas, here's the deal.
You gotta stop with the stealing.

666
00:47:15,532 --> 00:47:18,194
-I'm sorry.
-Okay. Okay.

667
00:47:19,803 --> 00:47:24,035
Okay. You're a lovely woman.
I really don't mean to judge in any way.

668
00:47:24,441 --> 00:47:26,238
It's just that people are going to
start to notice...

669
00:47:26,343 --> 00:47:29,176
That's my cell phone.
And somehow, you got it out of here.

670
00:47:29,279 --> 00:47:31,975
I just want to ask... Wow! You're good.

671
00:47:34,117 --> 00:47:36,108
Actually, it was only 10.

672
00:47:36,386 --> 00:47:39,184
Well, waste not, want not, is what I say.

673
00:47:39,489 --> 00:47:40,786
All right.

674
00:47:43,961 --> 00:47:49,957
<i>* Nothing but blue skies
from now on</i>

675
00:47:52,035 --> 00:47:54,401
I wish I could be happy like you.

676
00:47:54,705 --> 00:47:57,173
God, you've gotta get more sex.

677
00:47:57,741 --> 00:48:00,710
-Irv...
-I'm sorry, but what is it with you?

678
00:48:00,811 --> 00:48:02,711
Don't you have a boyfriend?

679
00:48:02,813 --> 00:48:04,974
I'm on a tour bus, like,
6 days a week.

680
00:48:05,082 --> 00:48:08,848
Well, you gotta get in touch
with your wild thing.

681
00:48:10,854 --> 00:48:13,652
I think we can get in here
and just touch on everything...

682
00:48:13,757 --> 00:48:17,056
Actually, there's someone
I'm kind of interested in.

683
00:48:17,794 --> 00:48:19,125
At the bar.

684
00:48:22,399 --> 00:48:24,424
-Yes.
-Really?

685
00:48:24,534 --> 00:48:25,831
Go for it.

686
00:48:35,212 --> 00:48:38,147
Just make sure it's zoned for a parking lot.

687
00:48:42,185 --> 00:48:43,675
I like daisies.

688
00:48:45,455 --> 00:48:47,150
I'll call you back.

689
00:48:47,357 --> 00:48:48,619
So do I.

690
00:48:49,359 --> 00:48:51,293
2 Metaxa tonics, Nick.

691
00:48:51,395 --> 00:48:51,795
So you work at an IHOP?

692
00:48:51,795 --> 00:48:53,262
So you work at an IHOP?

693
00:48:53,964 --> 00:48:56,728
Yeah, well, I mean, that makes it sound
like I'm a waiter, you know.

694
00:48:56,833 --> 00:48:59,233
I'm the number one
corporate representative for IHOP.

695
00:48:59,336 --> 00:49:01,861
I sold 100 franchises last year.

696
00:49:01,972 --> 00:49:05,499
We're expanding Ohio,
if you're looking for an investment.

697
00:49:05,609 --> 00:49:07,668
How do we say, "Cheers"?

698
00:49:08,445 --> 00:49:10,037
We say, "ya mas, to our health."

699
00:49:15,552 --> 00:49:18,487
So what do you do for fun?

700
00:49:18,855 --> 00:49:20,083
For fun?

701
00:49:22,726 --> 00:49:23,852
Syrup.

702
00:49:25,562 --> 00:49:28,292
I collect vintage syrups.

703
00:49:29,266 --> 00:49:33,760
Yeah. Some people are
into art or wines, you know.

704
00:49:33,870 --> 00:49:36,998
I'm into vintage syrups.
Not too old. When you say "vintage,"

705
00:49:37,107 --> 00:49:40,042
you think, "Oh, my God,
the guy's drinking syrup from 1912."

706
00:49:40,143 --> 00:49:42,668
No. The oldest I have is 1948.

707
00:49:42,779 --> 00:49:45,907
So it's post-war, but it's still really special.

708
00:49:46,083 --> 00:49:49,712
I mean, it's still edible. You can pote it.
It's potent, potable? Potable?

709
00:49:49,820 --> 00:49:50,809
I never watch Jeopardy!

710
00:49:50,921 --> 00:49:53,617
Anyway, so the thing that
I like about syrup is it's sweet,

711
00:49:53,724 --> 00:49:55,157
no matter how bad your day is.

712
00:49:55,258 --> 00:49:58,489
...a German waffle,
but there's also a French crepe.

713
00:49:58,595 --> 00:50:00,256
I mean, we had to have
a whole meeting in Iowa,

714
00:50:00,364 --> 00:50:02,525
because the waitresses
were calling them "craps."

715
00:50:02,632 --> 00:50:05,999
And no one wants to eat crap
so much anymore.

716
00:50:06,103 --> 00:50:07,263
Sometimes in Mississippi.

717
00:50:07,371 --> 00:50:09,430
But usually you find that
people don't want to have

718
00:50:09,539 --> 00:50:12,975
a food that's not appetizingly named,
you know.

719
00:50:13,076 --> 00:50:16,603
That's why I love any kind
of an international flair.

720
00:50:16,713 --> 00:50:20,649
Swedish crepes. It just automatically
sounds better. It's exotic.

721
00:50:20,751 --> 00:50:24,687
My favorite, though, natural.
Pecans, coconut, which is so, so good.

722
00:50:24,788 --> 00:50:28,815
It's very, very fattening, and... Not that
I have anything against fat people.

723
00:50:28,925 --> 00:50:30,825
Fat people are our biggest demographic.

724
00:50:30,927 --> 00:50:33,589
I bought 2 houses in Florida
off of fat people. God bless them.

725
00:50:46,243 --> 00:50:50,805
-Good morning.
-Good morning. Hi. Good morning.

726
00:50:53,250 --> 00:50:57,186
Georgia. Did I see you on a date last night?

727
00:50:58,088 --> 00:51:01,751
-How was it?
-Well, I now know the history of syrup.

728
00:51:01,858 --> 00:51:03,416
Hey, that was fun last night.

729
00:51:03,527 --> 00:51:05,927
-Maple trees rock.
-Yeah, they do.

730
00:51:07,798 --> 00:51:10,733
Please, to the left here,
thank you very much.

731
00:51:11,334 --> 00:51:12,892
I see you enjoy Greece, eh?

732
00:51:13,003 --> 00:51:14,868
-Yeah.
-Yeah? For you.

733
00:51:15,338 --> 00:51:16,362
Thanks!

734
00:51:16,473 --> 00:51:19,465
Hey, listen, I can't buy for everybody, so...

735
00:51:19,810 --> 00:51:22,677
-Yeah. What does it say?
-"I love Greece."

736
00:51:24,014 --> 00:51:28,314
I do, bro! Awesome! Thank you, man!

737
00:51:29,686 --> 00:51:31,210
-Let me help you.
-Pardon?

738
00:51:31,321 --> 00:51:32,379
I'm just helping you.

739
00:51:32,489 --> 00:51:34,423
-Louder, please.
-I'm just helping you.

740
00:51:34,524 --> 00:51:37,425
-No! I can manage. Really.
-Okay.

741
00:51:37,527 --> 00:51:39,324
-Thank you.
-All right.

742
00:51:41,598 --> 00:51:43,998
Your group. Losers.

743
00:51:46,169 --> 00:51:47,534
"What? What?"

744
00:51:50,740 --> 00:51:52,469
"So hot. So hot."

745
00:51:52,576 --> 00:51:54,601
"How much is this? How much is that?"

746
00:52:04,254 --> 00:52:06,051
Hello, everybody.

747
00:52:06,156 --> 00:52:07,214
Hey!

748
00:52:08,358 --> 00:52:11,122
Don't diss my group. They're nice people.

749
00:52:12,095 --> 00:52:15,622
It's so cold in here.

750
00:52:22,672 --> 00:52:25,197
That's everyone. Except the Americans.

751
00:52:25,308 --> 00:52:29,369
Al, just think. This course
could be thousands of years old.

752
00:52:31,047 --> 00:52:34,039
Well, I wonder if Jesus ever played here.

753
00:52:34,518 --> 00:52:36,076
Big Al. Kim.

754
00:52:37,787 --> 00:52:41,814
You know how you like to get up
in front of everybody and bore us?

755
00:52:41,925 --> 00:52:43,483
Please go on.

756
00:52:43,593 --> 00:52:47,927
I have a very exciting idea.
Why don't you try entertaining everybody?

757
00:52:48,031 --> 00:52:49,555
Irv, how am I gonna do that?

758
00:52:49,666 --> 00:52:52,829
History has got a lot of dirty stories.

759
00:52:55,105 --> 00:52:56,470
Sex sells.

760
00:53:07,584 --> 00:53:10,075
Well, it turned out to be
a beautiful day.

761
00:53:10,987 --> 00:53:13,182
Thanks for the nice weather, Irv.

762
00:53:14,691 --> 00:53:15,715
Good on you, Irv.

763
00:53:15,825 --> 00:53:19,761
I thought you were joking last night.
You got some power, fellow.

764
00:53:19,863 --> 00:53:23,060
Irv, do you think you could bless Barnaby?

765
00:53:23,166 --> 00:53:25,498
Maybe he'd move a bit faster.

766
00:53:25,602 --> 00:53:30,005
I bless you in the name of Socrates,
Hippocrates and feta cheese.

767
00:53:30,574 --> 00:53:32,565
Hallelujah.

768
00:53:32,676 --> 00:53:35,338
This is appropriate,
because we're headed to Delphi,

769
00:53:35,445 --> 00:53:38,175
which is the most mystical spot
in all of Greece.

770
00:53:38,281 --> 00:53:42,183
In ancient times, the oracle of Delphi
would answer questions

771
00:53:42,285 --> 00:53:46,016
for kings and commoners, like,
"Who should I vote for?"

772
00:53:47,190 --> 00:53:48,953
Or other stuff.

773
00:53:52,362 --> 00:53:55,627
Like, "Shall I take a lover?"

774
00:53:55,732 --> 00:53:57,791
-Hey, look out.
-Hello.

775
00:53:58,501 --> 00:54:00,799
That's what we're talking about.

776
00:54:01,204 --> 00:54:04,173
-Now, the oracle was a virgin.
-Here we go.

777
00:54:04,274 --> 00:54:08,301
And she was dressed in flowing gowns
of sheer silk.

778
00:54:09,613 --> 00:54:12,241
Some say she wore nothing at all.

779
00:54:12,349 --> 00:54:13,941
Hey, I like that.

780
00:54:14,951 --> 00:54:16,043
Oh, my.

781
00:54:16,152 --> 00:54:18,518
And then she would inhale
the sacred vapors.

782
00:54:18,622 --> 00:54:21,591
-Louder, please.
-And she would go into raptures.

783
00:54:21,691 --> 00:54:25,923
-Louder.
-She would say, "Oh, Zeus, take my body.

784
00:54:26,663 --> 00:54:30,690
"Oh, Zeus, fill me with your wisdom.

785
00:54:31,268 --> 00:54:34,931
"Oh, Zeus, my body is your vessel.

786
00:54:39,509 --> 00:54:42,273
"Take me! Take me! Take me! "

787
00:54:44,714 --> 00:54:45,976
Poupi!

788
00:54:57,827 --> 00:54:59,954
-Caitlin, are you all right?
-I dropped my phone.

789
00:55:00,063 --> 00:55:01,462
-Everybody all right?
-Yeah.

790
00:55:01,564 --> 00:55:04,931
Alive! Alive! Please, alive, everybody.

791
00:55:08,171 --> 00:55:09,536
Okay. Okay.

792
00:55:09,906 --> 00:55:12,101
Everybody, let's get off the bus, okay?
Everybody.

793
00:55:12,776 --> 00:55:14,368
Okay, it's gonna be
about 20 more minutes.

794
00:55:14,477 --> 00:55:17,469
Irv, Olga, Svetlana? You okay?
You're alive.

795
00:55:18,682 --> 00:55:20,673
-Is everybody okay?
-Everybody's fine.

796
00:55:20,784 --> 00:55:23,719
Everybody's fine,
and we got a good story out of it.

797
00:55:23,820 --> 00:55:26,846
You know, this whole thing happened
'cause he was staring at you, Angie.

798
00:55:26,956 --> 00:55:30,392
-Who?
-Poupi. Up there.

799
00:55:31,461 --> 00:55:34,089
Creepy driver, checking out the goats.

800
00:55:34,331 --> 00:55:37,789
Angie, everyone on the bus
has a different word for it.

801
00:55:37,901 --> 00:55:40,096
I call it "mysterious."

802
00:55:40,203 --> 00:55:43,036
Personally, I think he shaved his neck
just for you.

803
00:55:43,139 --> 00:55:45,801
-What?
-He's a nice guy, go talk to him.

804
00:55:45,909 --> 00:55:47,900
Yeah, he's quiet, but he's nice.

805
00:55:48,011 --> 00:55:51,606
Fine. Yeah, sometimes he's nice,
but mostly he just makes me mad.

806
00:55:51,715 --> 00:55:54,809
Hot, not mad.
It's been so long, you forgot the difference.

807
00:55:54,918 --> 00:55:57,546
-Okay. Smile, he feels terrible.
-Come on.

808
00:55:57,654 --> 00:55:59,849
He's the one not wearing the bell.

809
00:55:59,956 --> 00:56:01,753
-Work it.
-Kimmy.

810
00:56:16,940 --> 00:56:18,805
Sorry about your bus.

811
00:56:20,944 --> 00:56:25,381
You distracted me.
I could have killed you. All of us.

812
00:56:26,015 --> 00:56:28,848
-I was just trying to have fun.
-Oh, well...

813
00:56:30,954 --> 00:56:32,751
That's good, I guess.

814
00:56:35,091 --> 00:56:36,581
The first day,

815
00:56:37,694 --> 00:56:41,562
you asked me if I wonder
what I'm doing with my life. Right?

816
00:56:41,765 --> 00:56:43,824
-Yeah.
-Maybe I can explain.

817
00:56:45,668 --> 00:56:47,693
What do you call that guy?

818
00:56:48,338 --> 00:56:52,672
He goes in front of people
and waves his dick around.

819
00:56:53,843 --> 00:56:55,811
We called him Uncle Phil.

820
00:56:56,513 --> 00:56:58,481
What? No. No.

821
00:56:58,748 --> 00:57:00,943
He's in front of the people
who play the music.

822
00:57:01,050 --> 00:57:03,416
Stick! That's a conductor.

823
00:57:03,520 --> 00:57:06,250
Right. Right. A conductor. He comes out.

824
00:57:07,056 --> 00:57:09,388
-He waves his stick.
-His stick.

825
00:57:10,026 --> 00:57:13,826
And people get to hear
the most beautiful sounds in the world.

826
00:57:14,297 --> 00:57:18,495
He hears the music up close.
He feels it in his bones.

827
00:57:19,636 --> 00:57:22,537
And that's what my job is like. I sit there.

828
00:57:22,839 --> 00:57:25,774
I turn the wheel this way. Turn that way.

829
00:57:26,109 --> 00:57:29,806
And before me comes this great vision.
Always beautiful.

830
00:57:31,181 --> 00:57:32,773
The scenery

831
00:57:34,250 --> 00:57:37,117
is frozen.

832
00:57:38,321 --> 00:57:39,754
Frozen music.

833
00:57:42,692 --> 00:57:44,455
And you know what I like?

834
00:57:44,561 --> 00:57:47,029
You got the best seat in the house.

835
00:57:48,064 --> 00:57:49,088
Yes.

836
00:58:12,722 --> 00:58:14,053
Thank you.

837
00:58:15,158 --> 00:58:17,683
I like your passion for our history.

838
00:58:18,261 --> 00:58:20,525
But you are too busy looking up.

839
00:58:22,565 --> 00:58:23,862
Look here.

840
00:58:28,291 --> 00:58:30,657
I know, I'm touching your chests.

841
00:58:31,094 --> 00:58:32,288
Good.

842
00:58:42,171 --> 00:58:45,140
What happened with the pancake man
last night?

843
00:58:45,241 --> 00:58:46,435
Nothing.

844
00:58:47,944 --> 00:58:49,002
Good.

845
00:58:54,784 --> 00:58:56,251
Yeah!

846
00:59:07,030 --> 00:59:09,123
You can do it. Come on.

847
00:59:11,634 --> 00:59:14,865
Take deep breaths of
the healing powers of Delphi.

848
00:59:15,371 --> 00:59:17,601
Better than my workout at Curves.

849
00:59:18,575 --> 00:59:21,043
-Trick or treat?
-It's quite good, actually.

850
00:59:21,144 --> 00:59:22,907
-Come on.
-Georgia,

851
00:59:23,746 --> 00:59:26,647
it's beautiful, but, come on,
so is an escalator.

852
00:59:26,749 --> 00:59:28,979
This is a very spiritual place.

853
00:59:29,085 --> 00:59:32,316
You can actually feel the energy
coming from the ground.

854
00:59:32,422 --> 00:59:35,653
Do you feel it? This is the temple of Apollo

855
00:59:36,559 --> 00:59:38,891
and the sanctuary of the oracle.

856
00:59:39,262 --> 00:59:40,752
Come on, Barnaby.

857
00:59:40,997 --> 00:59:43,932
Now, the Pythia, or the oracle,
was hidden from everyone

858
00:59:44,033 --> 00:59:47,799
except for the high priest.
And she would crouch behind him,

859
00:59:47,904 --> 00:59:50,236
she was hidden,
and she would answer questions.

860
00:59:50,340 --> 00:59:52,501
Like, she would go,

861
00:59:54,010 --> 00:59:57,275
"The oracle is in. Any questions?"

862
00:59:58,147 --> 00:59:59,444
Wasn't she a virgin?

863
01:00:00,617 --> 01:00:02,244
-How's that?
-Yeah.

864
01:00:02,919 --> 01:00:04,853
Then maybe you better do it.

865
01:00:04,954 --> 01:00:07,320
Yeah, go on Irv. You go in there.

866
01:00:07,957 --> 01:00:10,619
You can't spell virgin without I-R-V.

867
01:00:11,928 --> 01:00:14,863
All right, the oracle is open.

868
01:00:15,131 --> 01:00:16,359
-Anybody got a question?
-Yes.

869
01:00:16,466 --> 01:00:19,230
Are my legs good enough for a miniskirt?

870
01:00:19,969 --> 01:00:21,561
Hubba-hubba.

871
01:00:22,505 --> 01:00:24,496
I've got a serious question.

872
01:00:24,607 --> 01:00:26,802
Am I ever gonna get
cell reception up here?

873
01:00:26,909 --> 01:00:29,810
Turn the damn phone off.
This is a vacation.

874
01:00:30,380 --> 01:00:32,678
-I know that. All right.
-Guys.

875
01:00:32,915 --> 01:00:34,746
She's got one. Yeah.

876
01:00:35,852 --> 01:00:38,116
Why did my husband cheat on me?

877
01:00:38,821 --> 01:00:40,812
It wasn't you he cheated.

878
01:00:41,557 --> 01:00:46,119
Some men cheat themselves
out of living a life with a woman they love.

879
01:00:48,331 --> 01:00:49,628
Thank you.

880
01:00:51,801 --> 01:00:52,859
Okay.

881
01:00:54,070 --> 01:00:56,971
I've always wanted to start a family, but...

882
01:00:58,374 --> 01:01:01,502
Well, Big Al is
just gonna come out and say it.

883
01:01:02,612 --> 01:01:03,977
I'm scared.

884
01:01:05,281 --> 01:01:08,273
Being a parent is the best thing
in the world.

885
01:01:08,718 --> 01:01:12,677
And I guarantee you,
you're gonna be a great dad.

886
01:01:14,490 --> 01:01:16,185
-See?
-Thanks, Irv.

887
01:01:16,759 --> 01:01:20,593
Irvacle. What is it? Orvacle.

888
01:01:20,697 --> 01:01:22,164
Well, go on, Caitlin, ask a question.

889
01:01:22,265 --> 01:01:24,233
-Go on. Go on.
-No.

890
01:01:26,002 --> 01:01:27,492
Will my daughter ever stop sulking?

891
01:01:27,603 --> 01:01:30,071
Will my parents ever stop fighting?

892
01:01:30,807 --> 01:01:33,935
Parents sometimes forget
that they're an example.

893
01:01:40,717 --> 01:01:42,014
Thank you.

894
01:01:43,519 --> 01:01:46,511
Look, basically,
I gotta take a Johnny Riddle.

895
01:01:46,622 --> 01:01:48,249
Siph the pyth.

896
01:01:48,357 --> 01:01:49,915
-Where's the gents'?
-Yeah.

897
01:01:50,026 --> 01:01:52,494
-The men's room.
-Yeah. God.

898
01:01:52,595 --> 01:01:55,029
It's right up there. Oracle closed.

899
01:01:55,631 --> 01:01:57,098
Yay! Good job.

900
01:02:02,672 --> 01:02:05,539
I got a bar. I got a bar! I lost it.

901
01:02:20,389 --> 01:02:22,755
Hi, Oracle.

902
01:02:24,193 --> 01:02:28,357
I can't start something when
I'm about to leave this country. Right?

903
01:02:28,731 --> 01:02:31,222
-I mean, it's...
-What are you doing?

904
01:02:31,701 --> 01:02:33,760
I'm looking for something.

905
01:02:34,303 --> 01:02:36,601
-What?
-My dignity.

906
01:02:38,908 --> 01:02:40,034
-Georgia.
-What?

907
01:02:40,143 --> 01:02:44,637
You're looking for obstacles
rather than looking for magic.

908
01:03:01,531 --> 01:03:03,999
-This place is great.
-I felt a vibe.

909
01:03:04,167 --> 01:03:05,964
I'm so happy to hear that.

910
01:03:06,068 --> 01:03:08,059
Barnaby, do come on.

911
01:03:09,272 --> 01:03:10,899
Oh, my God!

912
01:03:12,875 --> 01:03:14,365
Barnaby!

913
01:03:14,477 --> 01:03:16,911
-What?
-Barnaby!

914
01:03:17,013 --> 01:03:18,480
What? What?

915
01:03:18,581 --> 01:03:20,947
He hasn't got his walker.

916
01:03:24,587 --> 01:03:26,578
It's the healing powers of Delphi.

917
01:03:26,689 --> 01:03:28,714
No, it was Irv.

918
01:03:28,825 --> 01:03:31,589
You heard him bless Barnaby on the bus.

919
01:03:31,694 --> 01:03:33,594
He's a miracle worker.

920
01:03:34,030 --> 01:03:36,123
Maybe he's a god of Delphi.

921
01:03:36,499 --> 01:03:39,559
I'm not a god.
That's just a rumor my mother started.

922
01:03:41,904 --> 01:03:44,634
-Okay.
-To the bus!

923
01:03:44,740 --> 01:03:47,937
-To the bus!
-Irvinator.

924
01:03:52,014 --> 01:03:53,948
Sexy! Very nice.

925
01:03:55,952 --> 01:03:58,182
-Let's go again!
-Again! Again!

926
01:03:58,487 --> 01:04:01,422
I've never even seen
this kind of alcohol before!

927
01:04:09,665 --> 01:04:11,929
-You look beautiful!
-Thank you.

928
01:04:12,034 --> 01:04:14,093
-Is it new?
-No, I had it.

929
01:04:15,638 --> 01:04:17,367
Do I have a tag? Anywhere?

930
01:04:17,473 --> 01:04:18,770
-No.
-Okay.

931
01:04:20,409 --> 01:04:21,569
Poupi?

932
01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:26,576
You ever kill a man?

933
01:04:34,991 --> 01:04:36,185
-He nodded.
-He didn't nod!

934
01:04:36,292 --> 01:04:37,884
-I saw him nod.
-Look, a nod is that.

935
01:04:37,994 --> 01:04:40,394
-That's $700.
-He didn't... No. Bet's off.

936
01:04:40,496 --> 01:04:41,963
No, I saw him nod.

937
01:04:43,666 --> 01:04:45,634
You looking for somebody?

938
01:04:47,069 --> 01:04:48,093
No.

939
01:04:48,404 --> 01:04:50,235
Really? Me, neither.

940
01:04:54,911 --> 01:05:00,679
Irv, don't you think everyone in the group
seems healthier and alive?

941
01:05:01,984 --> 01:05:04,111
-Yes, I do.
-It's Delphi.

942
01:05:06,355 --> 01:05:08,050
Or maybe you're God?

943
01:05:08,157 --> 01:05:09,317
-Georgia.
-Yeah?

944
01:05:09,425 --> 01:05:12,189
I haven't made a number 2
since Chicago.

945
01:05:12,361 --> 01:05:15,023
If I was God, I would fix that first.

946
01:05:15,131 --> 01:05:17,531
Okay, maybe you're not the God,
but maybe you're a Greek god.

947
01:05:17,633 --> 01:05:18,930
Like Zeus or Apollo.

948
01:05:19,035 --> 01:05:20,161
-That's true.
-Yeah.

949
01:05:20,269 --> 01:05:22,169
-No, no. No, I'm Zeus.
-I knew it.

950
01:05:22,271 --> 01:05:25,365
I'm Zeus.
I'm casting a spell on you and Poupi.

951
01:05:26,475 --> 01:05:30,070
-Irv, you know what? I can't.
-That's it.

952
01:05:30,446 --> 01:05:32,346
-Where are you going?
-I'm going to bed.

953
01:05:32,448 --> 01:05:36,441
But the guy that you're not looking for
went that way.

954
01:05:37,420 --> 01:05:38,580
-Okay.
-Georgia.

955
01:05:38,688 --> 01:05:39,746
What?

956
01:05:40,356 --> 01:05:42,551
I think you have a bigger problem.

957
01:05:42,658 --> 01:05:44,091
Yeah, Greece!

958
01:05:59,809 --> 01:06:01,208
Hey, Gator!

959
01:06:02,178 --> 01:06:03,611
Hey! Georgia!

960
01:06:03,713 --> 01:06:06,614
Georgia, I've been kicking
these guys' asses!

961
01:06:06,849 --> 01:06:08,783
-Asses!
-Asses.

962
01:06:09,552 --> 01:06:11,110
Hey, where'd you get this shirt?

963
01:06:11,220 --> 01:06:12,653
-You like it?
-Yeah.

964
01:06:12,755 --> 01:06:14,723
-That guy Nico gave it to me.
-Yeah.

965
01:06:14,824 --> 01:06:17,349
-He's so cool!
-And it's got Greek writing on it.

966
01:06:17,460 --> 01:06:20,691
-Yeah! It's got, "I love Greece! "
-Yeah, it says...

967
01:06:32,441 --> 01:06:33,772
Excuse me.

968
01:06:33,976 --> 01:06:36,740
-Greek toes taste funny to you, hey?
-Yes.

969
01:06:37,913 --> 01:06:38,902
No, no, no.

970
01:06:40,116 --> 01:06:41,105
Orgy!

971
01:06:41,951 --> 01:06:43,714
I get the tour guide!

972
01:06:45,755 --> 01:06:46,881
Gator!

973
01:06:49,058 --> 01:06:50,491
50 on Gator.

974
01:06:50,659 --> 01:06:51,819
Gator!

975
01:07:14,750 --> 01:07:16,911
-Hello.
-Hello.

976
01:07:18,187 --> 01:07:20,018
-You want to sit?
-Yes.

977
01:07:20,156 --> 01:07:22,181
-Let me.
-Thank you.

978
01:07:25,227 --> 01:07:31,166
I just wanted to tell you that I really liked
what you said today about driving the bus.

979
01:07:34,403 --> 01:07:35,893
It was poetry.

980
01:07:36,005 --> 01:07:38,303
-No, it wasn't.
-Yes.

981
01:07:38,407 --> 01:07:42,503
-Where did you learn English?
-I rode my motorcycle across England.

982
01:07:44,113 --> 01:07:45,444
Of course.

983
01:07:46,382 --> 01:07:48,680
Wait. What should we drink to?

984
01:07:49,819 --> 01:07:52,117
It's my birthday in 6 months.

985
01:07:53,055 --> 01:07:54,545
You will be 25?

986
01:07:55,458 --> 01:07:56,857
Yes, I will.

987
01:08:07,636 --> 01:08:08,837
So...

988
01:08:15,945 --> 01:08:19,938
Thank you. I should eat more fruit.
It's healthy.

989
01:08:22,585 --> 01:08:24,177
It's really good.

990
01:08:27,156 --> 01:08:30,216
So I just wanted to tell you...

991
01:08:32,628 --> 01:08:36,086
You're such a nice guy. And I'm...
Okay, look.

992
01:08:38,134 --> 01:08:39,795
This can't happen.

993
01:08:39,902 --> 01:08:43,338
But it must.
You said you haven't made love in forever.

994
01:08:44,340 --> 01:08:46,274
Yeah, when I thought
you didn't speak English.

995
01:08:46,375 --> 01:08:49,401
You know what?
I've decided I'm leaving Greece,

996
01:08:49,812 --> 01:08:52,303
because this whole moving here
was an experiment

997
01:08:52,414 --> 01:08:54,905
to be brave and spontaneous, and...

998
01:08:57,520 --> 01:08:58,612
Okay.

999
01:09:04,727 --> 01:09:07,958
You know,
this whole impulsive and crazy and,

1000
01:09:08,063 --> 01:09:10,930
you know, jump into a thing, thing?

1001
01:09:11,734 --> 01:09:13,258
-Georgia?
-Yeah?

1002
01:09:14,036 --> 01:09:15,936
Your butt is too small.

1003
01:09:16,539 --> 01:09:17,904
That did it.

1004
01:09:45,434 --> 01:09:48,597
Is this the first time you made love
to a tour guide?

1005
01:09:48,771 --> 01:09:50,864
No. This was the third time.

1006
01:09:51,640 --> 01:09:53,073
-What?
-Yes.

1007
01:09:53,175 --> 01:09:56,110
The first time was 2 hours ago
by the boat.

1008
01:09:58,047 --> 01:10:01,107
-Second time, elevator.
-And the night is young.

1009
01:10:01,450 --> 01:10:02,610
Yeah.

1010
01:10:06,622 --> 01:10:08,089
What was that?

1011
01:10:08,624 --> 01:10:09,921
The Tullens?

1012
01:10:10,025 --> 01:10:11,686
Let's go find out.

1013
01:10:12,228 --> 01:10:14,924
-Come on. Come on. Come on.
-Look at me.

1014
01:10:24,206 --> 01:10:25,833
Hi.

1015
01:10:29,845 --> 01:10:31,506
Hi.

1016
01:10:35,751 --> 01:10:37,981
Hi.

1017
01:10:41,390 --> 01:10:43,017
Hi.

1018
01:10:46,328 --> 01:10:47,295
Hi.

1019
01:10:47,396 --> 01:10:48,385
Hi.

1020
01:10:49,832 --> 01:10:50,856
Hi.

1021
01:10:51,967 --> 01:10:53,901
-What time is it?
-Yeah.

1022
01:10:54,003 --> 01:10:55,595
I have to drive.

1023
01:10:57,640 --> 01:11:00,268
Irv! I don't know how you do it.

1024
01:11:01,110 --> 01:11:04,671
Little blue pill. Pfizer make it.
Medicare pay for it.

1025
01:11:07,316 --> 01:11:08,749
I'm sweating.

1026
01:11:08,951 --> 01:11:10,748
Oh! Hello.

1027
01:11:11,520 --> 01:11:13,715
Hot in your rooms, too, is it?

1028
01:11:15,424 --> 01:11:17,517
Yeah, it's hot. It's...

1029
01:11:19,561 --> 01:11:21,028
-Dorcas?
-Yes?

1030
01:11:21,597 --> 01:11:25,624
-Irv, do you wanna do something crazy?
-What did you have in mind?

1031
01:11:25,834 --> 01:11:27,358
A little swap.

1032
01:11:28,704 --> 01:11:30,467
I think I'm gonna need another blue pill.

1033
01:11:30,572 --> 01:11:32,403
Not that kind of swap!

1034
01:11:37,780 --> 01:11:40,908
Poor Nico. Did you hurt your lip?

1035
01:11:41,016 --> 01:11:42,711
No, it's nothing.

1036
01:11:42,818 --> 01:11:44,547
You hurt your head.

1037
01:11:44,953 --> 01:11:48,480
Poor Nico, let me kiss it better.

1038
01:11:51,293 --> 01:11:54,456
Now I'll buy us all a drink. Waiter!

1039
01:12:08,377 --> 01:12:09,366
Yes.

1040
01:12:29,732 --> 01:12:31,256
I feel so tired.

1041
01:12:32,568 --> 01:12:34,695
Good night.

1042
01:12:35,371 --> 01:12:36,804
Good night.

1043
01:12:39,041 --> 01:12:40,770
Good night, you two.

1044
01:12:59,862 --> 01:13:02,729
Good morning, good morning.

1045
01:13:03,198 --> 01:13:04,460
Good morning.

1046
01:13:04,566 --> 01:13:05,590
Hey!

1047
01:13:06,301 --> 01:13:07,461
Gotcha.

1048
01:13:08,837 --> 01:13:10,532
-Irv.
-Gesundheit.

1049
01:13:11,707 --> 01:13:13,004
-Good morning.
-Hey, rip-snort.

1050
01:13:13,108 --> 01:13:14,769
Okay. Right back at you.

1051
01:13:14,877 --> 01:13:16,970
-Hot today, huh, Nico?
-So?

1052
01:13:17,546 --> 01:13:18,877
Yo, Gator.

1053
01:13:20,282 --> 01:13:21,306
Morning, gang!

1054
01:13:21,417 --> 01:13:24,181
Georgia. How are you this morning?

1055
01:13:25,354 --> 01:13:29,085
-Fine, thank you. And how are you?
-Excellent.

1056
01:13:32,895 --> 01:13:34,863
8:00 a.m. and already hot?

1057
01:13:36,331 --> 01:13:38,196
Good morning, Caitlin.

1058
01:13:45,941 --> 01:13:49,968
-Poupi, do you know of a close beach?
-Of course.

1059
01:13:50,078 --> 01:13:53,479
And do you have any
16-year-old handsome nephews?

1060
01:13:54,216 --> 01:13:57,151
-Of course.
-Good. Will you call him for me?

1061
01:13:57,453 --> 01:13:58,943
-Good.
-Hey, wait.

1062
01:13:59,054 --> 01:14:00,351
-Yes.
-Why?

1063
01:14:00,956 --> 01:14:03,254
I like to keep my options open.

1064
01:14:08,564 --> 01:14:13,024
Wow! Is it hot, huh? Sorry about that.

1065
01:14:14,436 --> 01:14:17,496
Poupi? What do you say we try the AC?

1066
01:14:19,308 --> 01:14:21,242
-Are you sure?
-Well...

1067
01:14:21,343 --> 01:14:22,503
Oh, no, please.

1068
01:14:22,611 --> 01:14:25,546
I don't want to be asphyxiated
all over again.

1069
01:14:26,114 --> 01:14:28,912
Well, Irv?
Maybe you could work your magic?

1070
01:14:30,652 --> 01:14:34,213
Boogie-woogie, bully-bully.
Whirlpool working!

1071
01:14:38,494 --> 01:14:39,984
Hey, it works!

1072
01:14:41,430 --> 01:14:42,897
That's lovely.

1073
01:14:42,998 --> 01:14:44,329
That's great, Irvinator.

1074
01:14:47,803 --> 01:14:50,431
We've got a packed schedule today.
The Mycenaean tombs,

1075
01:14:50,539 --> 01:14:54,498
a tour of a monastery,
then a stop at the Thessaloniki Museum.

1076
01:14:57,112 --> 01:15:02,675
But we're not doing any of that.
Because Caitlin wants to go to the beach.

1077
01:15:04,553 --> 01:15:06,714
-Yeah!
-Yeah!

1078
01:15:07,956 --> 01:15:09,423
Hit it, Poupi.

1079
01:15:11,059 --> 01:15:13,289
And now we dance.

1080
01:15:16,865 --> 01:15:18,730
Georgia's got some moves!

1081
01:15:18,834 --> 01:15:20,096
-Here we go.
-No, I'm not dancing.

1082
01:15:20,202 --> 01:15:23,330
-Come on, come on. Up you get.
-No, no. I'm not.

1083
01:15:24,740 --> 01:15:29,200
Come on! Everybody up!
Put your arms like this! Yes!

1084
01:15:51,833 --> 01:15:53,357
This is great!

1085
01:16:01,577 --> 01:16:03,238
And go!

1086
01:16:03,345 --> 01:16:05,677
Come on! Come on! Come on!

1087
01:16:11,019 --> 01:16:13,419
<i>* I've got money in my pocket</i>

1088
01:16:13,522 --> 01:16:15,752
<i>* I've got loving in the air</i>

1089
01:16:15,857 --> 01:16:18,155
<i>* There is nothing that will stop me</i>

1090
01:16:18,260 --> 01:16:20,490
<i>* And I really just don 't care</i>

1091
01:16:23,699 --> 01:16:25,530
Elizabeth, dear,
do please come out of there.

1092
01:16:25,634 --> 01:16:28,467
I won't, I don't want to
get sunburned.

1093
01:16:29,805 --> 01:16:34,105
If you don't come out,
I'm going to tell everyone how old you are.

1094
01:16:35,711 --> 01:16:37,269
You know you set my world on fire

1095
01:16:37,379 --> 01:16:40,780
-It's got to be love
-It's got to be love from the very start

1096
01:16:40,882 --> 01:16:42,873
It's got to be love not a broken heart

1097
01:16:42,985 --> 01:16:45,715
Well, that was certainly worth the wait.

1098
01:16:45,821 --> 01:16:47,584
You know you set my world on fire

1099
01:16:47,689 --> 01:16:50,351
-It's got to be love
-It's got to be love from the very start

1100
01:16:50,459 --> 01:16:52,120
Here. My nephew.

1101
01:16:52,294 --> 01:16:56,788
Feel like jumping in the river
or dancing in the rain

1102
01:16:57,232 --> 01:17:01,692
The different places smiling faces
It always make my day

1103
01:17:01,837 --> 01:17:06,331
And all are happy people
just following your dream

1104
01:17:06,775 --> 01:17:10,973
'Cause everything you want
is not a fly-by fantasy

1105
01:17:13,649 --> 01:17:16,447
-What's your name?
-Caitlin. What's yours?

1106
01:17:16,952 --> 01:17:18,817
I'm Doudi, Doudi Kakas.

1107
01:17:21,857 --> 01:17:22,949
Of course.

1108
01:17:23,425 --> 01:17:26,394
-It's got to be love
-It's got to be love from the very start

1109
01:17:26,495 --> 01:17:28,827
It's got to be love not a broken heart

1110
01:17:28,930 --> 01:17:31,728
Come on! Get in there! Tsunami time!

1111
01:17:31,833 --> 01:17:33,357
You know you set my world on fire

1112
01:17:33,468 --> 01:17:35,959
-It's got to be love
-It's got to be love from the very start

1113
01:17:36,071 --> 01:17:38,039
It's got to be love not a broken heart

1114
01:17:38,140 --> 01:17:40,836
-It's got to be love
-It's got to be love my one true desire

1115
01:17:40,942 --> 01:17:43,433
You know you set my world on fire

1116
01:17:53,588 --> 01:17:55,021
-It's got to be love
-It's got to be love from the very start

1117
01:17:55,123 --> 01:17:57,318
You know you set my world on fire

1118
01:17:57,426 --> 01:17:59,951
It's got to be love

1119
01:18:00,062 --> 01:18:02,155
You know you set my world on fire

1120
01:18:04,733 --> 01:18:05,859
Here.

1121
01:18:13,809 --> 01:18:16,334
A woman sends me kisses on the wind.

1122
01:18:24,486 --> 01:18:26,984
Hoping they will bring love to her.

1123
01:18:34,930 --> 01:18:37,490
She's waiting for a long time.

1124
01:18:58,687 --> 01:19:00,416
You waited too long.

1125
01:19:01,456 --> 01:19:05,051
Well, I had to give you a few years
to sow some wild oats.

1126
01:19:05,627 --> 01:19:07,151
You're welcome!

1127
01:19:09,464 --> 01:19:11,022
I've missed you.

1128
01:19:13,101 --> 01:19:15,194
Not as much as I missed you.

1129
01:19:20,542 --> 01:19:22,407
...of a woman in love.

1130
01:19:31,453 --> 01:19:32,920
That's lovely.

1131
01:19:34,756 --> 01:19:35,916
Classic.

1132
01:19:36,024 --> 01:19:39,118
-All right, who wants the last pancake?
-Delicious.

1133
01:19:39,227 --> 01:19:41,195
Hook me up! Hook me up now!

1134
01:19:41,530 --> 01:19:43,828
I feel like I've had a month of Sundays.

1135
01:19:43,932 --> 01:19:46,025
I'm gonna re-up the firewood
to get a bigger fire.

1136
01:19:46,134 --> 01:19:49,103
Hey, I've got something better for that fire.

1137
01:19:53,074 --> 01:19:54,905
Yes! Yeah!

1138
01:19:56,011 --> 01:19:57,273
She did it.

1139
01:19:57,379 --> 01:19:59,006
That really burns.

1140
01:19:59,314 --> 01:20:00,781
It's a blazer!

1141
01:20:02,884 --> 01:20:04,511
Keep your day job.

1142
01:20:06,087 --> 01:20:07,782
-All right.
-What?

1143
01:20:07,889 --> 01:20:09,516
-Oh, yeah.
-Not the cell phone.

1144
01:20:09,624 --> 01:20:11,057
No, no, no, you're not.

1145
01:20:11,159 --> 01:20:12,888
Yes! Yes! Burn it.

1146
01:20:14,596 --> 01:20:16,655
I cannot believe you just did that.

1147
01:20:16,765 --> 01:20:18,198
I feel lighter.

1148
01:20:18,300 --> 01:20:20,234
I can't believe it. Irv?

1149
01:20:21,469 --> 01:20:22,834
-Irv!
-Wait.

1150
01:20:23,405 --> 01:20:25,168
-What happened?
-Irv.

1151
01:20:26,441 --> 01:20:28,170
-Irv!
-What's wrong?

1152
01:20:31,847 --> 01:20:34,077
-Call an ambulance!
-I'll do it.

1153
01:20:34,182 --> 01:20:37,345
Now, you stay with us!
And you listen to my voice, all right?

1154
01:20:37,452 --> 01:20:39,443
Irv? Irv?

1155
01:20:41,423 --> 01:20:44,620
So we've been told the hospital
is keeping him for observation.

1156
01:20:44,726 --> 01:20:46,421
They're gonna run some tests and...

1157
01:20:46,528 --> 01:20:48,928
-When does he get out?
-Well, they're not sure, Gator.

1158
01:20:49,030 --> 01:20:52,591
They really aren't. The doctors actually
won't know anything until he wakes up.

1159
01:20:52,701 --> 01:20:55,829
But, look, they don't know Irv
like we do, right?

1160
01:20:55,937 --> 01:20:57,632
-Right.
-Yeah.

1161
01:20:58,506 --> 01:21:00,667
All right. This is the propylaeum.

1162
01:21:00,775 --> 01:21:03,243
Just up those stairs is the Parthenon.

1163
01:21:03,879 --> 01:21:05,813
How many more stairs?

1164
01:21:06,147 --> 01:21:08,672
About 30, 50. A lot.

1165
01:21:10,018 --> 01:21:11,383
It's okay.

1166
01:21:11,953 --> 01:21:16,583
We're tired, and the stress of Irv is... Yeah.

1167
01:21:18,093 --> 01:21:20,425
Anyone who wants to, follow me.

1168
01:21:49,557 --> 01:21:51,286
Incredible, isn't it?

1169
01:21:52,894 --> 01:21:55,158
-Tell us about it.
-Yeah, what's the John Dory?

1170
01:21:55,263 --> 01:21:59,791
Well, we have traveled
within a very mysterious triangle.

1171
01:22:00,635 --> 01:22:03,331
Delphi, Athens, Olympia.

1172
01:22:04,205 --> 01:22:09,802
And this city, Athens, got its name
from the goddess of wisdom, Athena.

1173
01:22:10,545 --> 01:22:13,514
And the Parthenon was built to honor her.

1174
01:22:13,949 --> 01:22:16,008
It was finished in 432 B.C.

1175
01:22:19,154 --> 01:22:21,622
Let me tell you why I love it here.

1176
01:22:23,158 --> 01:22:26,855
Listen to the sound of the wind
blowing through the columns.

1177
01:22:34,502 --> 01:22:39,132
That is the same wind that
mankind has listened to for centuries.

1178
01:22:40,342 --> 01:22:44,802
It's the sound of nature
meeting human imagination.

1179
01:22:47,482 --> 01:22:50,144
And for me, that's history.

1180
01:22:53,054 --> 01:22:54,919
I tell you what, Angie.

1181
01:22:55,357 --> 01:22:57,882
It's just plain beautiful. That's what it is.

1182
01:22:57,993 --> 01:23:00,621
-It was lovely.
-Best thing I ever set eyes on.

1183
01:23:00,729 --> 01:23:02,458
It's Greek-alicious.

1184
01:23:06,868 --> 01:23:08,199
Yes, Gator.

1185
01:23:08,903 --> 01:23:10,768
There's still something I haven't seen.

1186
01:23:10,872 --> 01:23:11,964
What's that?

1187
01:23:12,073 --> 01:23:13,665
A Greek hospital.

1188
01:23:16,044 --> 01:23:17,033
-Yeah.
-Yeah.

1189
01:23:17,145 --> 01:23:19,943
-Good call, Gator.
-I'd like to see one of those, too.

1190
01:23:20,048 --> 01:23:22,676
I know a good one. I'll take us all.

1191
01:23:23,218 --> 01:23:26,051
Fine, fine, take your stupid pictures

1192
01:23:26,154 --> 01:23:28,520
and I go get you some ice cream.

1193
01:23:29,057 --> 01:23:30,786
Good morning, Nico.

1194
01:23:31,192 --> 01:23:34,389
Yeah? I have a headache in my head.

1195
01:23:34,496 --> 01:23:38,159
The bus air conditioner, it break,
and these American idiots

1196
01:23:38,266 --> 01:23:40,757
never stops to complain,
complain, complain.

1197
01:23:40,869 --> 01:23:42,427
Wait a minute!

1198
01:23:42,537 --> 01:23:45,506
Did you just call us Americans?

1199
01:23:45,707 --> 01:23:48,471
Americans, Canadians.
What's the difference?

1200
01:23:48,576 --> 01:23:49,804
You jerk!

1201
01:23:57,986 --> 01:23:59,453
Runs like a sheila!

1202
01:24:01,823 --> 01:24:04,621
And the Greek word for hospital
is nosocomio.

1203
01:24:04,726 --> 01:24:05,750
Say it with me.

1204
01:24:07,162 --> 01:24:09,756
Very good. This is one of
the finest hospitals in Athens.

1205
01:24:09,864 --> 01:24:11,855
Only the best for our Irv.

1206
01:24:12,767 --> 01:24:14,166
-Hey, hey, hey.
-Irv!

1207
01:24:16,504 --> 01:24:17,471
Dude!

1208
01:24:18,706 --> 01:24:19,866
This nice guy is for you.

1209
01:24:19,974 --> 01:24:21,601
You coming
to the farewell party tonight, then?

1210
01:24:21,709 --> 01:24:22,767
Here you go, mate,
shove that down your gullet.

1211
01:24:22,877 --> 01:24:24,902
This is great. Thank you, all.

1212
01:24:25,013 --> 01:24:27,743
-Looking good, Irv.
-Made in America, Irv.

1213
01:24:28,083 --> 01:24:29,380
Because you missed the Parthenon.

1214
01:24:29,484 --> 01:24:32,749
-Wear it in good health, boss.
-You're in the pink, Irv.

1215
01:24:32,854 --> 01:24:34,014
Friends.

1216
01:24:35,090 --> 01:24:36,284
This is great.

1217
01:24:36,391 --> 01:24:38,951
So many visitors. Nice.

1218
01:24:39,394 --> 01:24:41,919
-Now get out, yes.
-Take care of him.

1219
01:24:42,497 --> 01:24:43,964
Get well, Irv.

1220
01:24:44,699 --> 01:24:47,167
-You're looking good, Irv.
-Hey, stay up, man.

1221
01:24:47,268 --> 01:24:49,361
-Yo, Gator.
-On you, mate.

1222
01:24:50,839 --> 01:24:53,069
-Bye, Irv.
-Dorcas.

1223
01:24:55,910 --> 01:24:57,138
Bye, Irv.

1224
01:25:00,181 --> 01:25:01,478
Thank you.

1225
01:25:02,851 --> 01:25:04,216
My pleasure.

1226
01:25:25,840 --> 01:25:27,205
Say, "Cheese."

1227
01:25:29,077 --> 01:25:32,376
Great buffet, Ange.
These baklavas are a riot.

1228
01:25:33,815 --> 01:25:37,876
Angie, I've got benecoupola and dolmades
and they look very good.

1229
01:25:37,986 --> 01:25:42,218
-Or, as they say in Greek, poli kala.
-That's pretty good.

1230
01:25:42,323 --> 01:25:46,225
Hey, listen, it's not a big deal,
but my name is not Angie or Ange.

1231
01:25:46,327 --> 01:25:48,420
Yeah. We know. It's Georgia.

1232
01:25:49,197 --> 01:25:51,324
So why do you call me Angie?

1233
01:25:51,666 --> 01:25:54,726
Look at you.
You look just like Angelina Jolie.

1234
01:25:55,236 --> 01:25:57,466
You know,
that actress that adopts everybody.

1235
01:25:57,572 --> 01:26:00,541
-We love her.
-You must get that all the time.

1236
01:26:01,075 --> 01:26:02,906
Yes, I do. Yes.

1237
01:26:06,214 --> 01:26:07,806
Look who's here.

1238
01:26:11,553 --> 01:26:13,418
-Hi.
-Caitlin, hi.

1239
01:26:14,155 --> 01:26:15,952
-For you.
-Thank you.

1240
01:26:16,057 --> 01:26:18,048
Let's have a look at you.

1241
01:26:18,159 --> 01:26:21,185
<i>* No, I cannot count the ways</i>

1242
01:26:22,197 --> 01:26:25,826
<i>* You have made my life so blessed</i>

1243
01:26:26,167 --> 01:26:30,035
<i>* All I know is that you came</i>

1244
01:26:30,138 --> 01:26:33,801
<i>* And made beauty of my mess</i>

1245
01:26:33,908 --> 01:26:37,605
<i>* You make me happy</i>

1246
01:26:37,712 --> 01:26:40,579
<i>* You make me feel the way I do</i>

1247
01:26:40,682 --> 01:26:42,013
Hey, Poups.

1248
01:26:42,850 --> 01:26:47,514
You know, you turned out to be all right
for a guy that doesn't say much.

1249
01:26:49,257 --> 01:26:52,249
-Am I interrupting something?
-It's all right.

1250
01:26:53,161 --> 01:26:54,458
Excuse me.

1251
01:26:56,464 --> 01:26:58,591
-I'll get some wine.
-Okay.

1252
01:26:58,700 --> 01:27:00,793
Georgie, I got these for you.

1253
01:27:00,902 --> 01:27:03,166
Dorcas, you shouldn't do this.

1254
01:27:04,005 --> 01:27:06,496
It's all right. I've got the receipt.

1255
01:27:07,709 --> 01:27:10,337
-Good for you.
-Well, it's a start.

1256
01:27:16,050 --> 01:27:18,712
-Georgia. I saw you.
-Good.

1257
01:27:19,520 --> 01:27:21,488
To my hand you can speak.

1258
01:27:22,457 --> 01:27:24,550
You wrote this. "Excellent."

1259
01:27:24,792 --> 01:27:27,590
"Georgia is terrific."
"Georgia is wonderful."

1260
01:27:27,695 --> 01:27:30,664
"You are so lucky
to have someone like Angie."

1261
01:27:30,765 --> 01:27:32,790
I look like Angelina Jolie.

1262
01:27:32,900 --> 01:27:34,834
No, you don't. Who wrote this?

1263
01:27:34,936 --> 01:27:37,131
-I did. I wrote that.
-I did.

1264
01:27:37,238 --> 01:27:39,536
-I did.
-I totally did.

1265
01:27:39,641 --> 01:27:41,541
-We love Angie.
-Georgia.

1266
01:27:41,643 --> 01:27:43,372
-She's the best.
-Thank you, guys.

1267
01:27:43,478 --> 01:27:45,503
It's a fluke. So no raise.

1268
01:27:45,613 --> 01:27:46,671
Fine.

1269
01:27:47,448 --> 01:27:50,110
All right, 10%. That's as high as I go.

1270
01:27:50,218 --> 01:27:51,276
Okay.

1271
01:27:51,753 --> 01:27:53,186
You didn't get a letter from me, did you?

1272
01:27:53,288 --> 01:27:55,813
Sure I did. Butt-smoocher.

1273
01:27:57,558 --> 01:28:00,686
"Dear Maria,
you are my only friend in Greece."

1274
01:28:01,129 --> 01:28:03,427
The rest got stained. Coffee?

1275
01:28:05,700 --> 01:28:06,758
Coffee?

1276
01:28:06,868 --> 01:28:09,735
Everybody should take the time
for a coffee.

1277
01:28:10,071 --> 01:28:13,336
I've heard everyone should take time
for a coffee.

1278
01:28:13,441 --> 01:28:16,103
I just said that. What?

1279
01:28:16,911 --> 01:28:19,209
You found your kefi.

1280
01:28:20,014 --> 01:28:21,106
Yes.

1281
01:28:22,183 --> 01:28:24,242
And who the hell are you?

1282
01:28:24,752 --> 01:28:25,620
-Procopi.
-Who?

1283
01:28:25,620 --> 01:28:26,644
-Procopi.
-Who?

1284
01:28:27,221 --> 01:28:30,088
-Poupi Kakas.
-Shut up.

1285
01:28:30,725 --> 01:28:33,523
Maria, will you make me a full-time driver?

1286
01:28:33,628 --> 01:28:38,190
Okay. Georgia, 20%. That's as high as I go.

1287
01:28:38,299 --> 01:28:40,767
Okay. Why are you being nice to me?

1288
01:28:47,775 --> 01:28:50,300
-It's open.
-Michigan University.

1289
01:28:50,812 --> 01:28:52,677
You got the job there.

1290
01:29:00,388 --> 01:29:02,015
I have a job here.

1291
01:29:04,225 --> 01:29:08,958
And it won't be easy.
Nico? He quit. Mama's boy.

1292
01:29:09,630 --> 01:29:12,064
I knew his father. Same thing.

1293
01:29:13,368 --> 01:29:16,201
-Are you sure?
-Yes, I'm sure.

1294
01:29:16,938 --> 01:29:19,406
-If you'll be my driver.
-Of course.

1295
01:29:20,842 --> 01:29:23,811
-Will you hold on just a second?
-I'm waiting.

1296
01:29:27,181 --> 01:29:29,240
Everyone. Everyone.

1297
01:29:29,350 --> 01:29:32,979
I'm so happy I met you,
and I'm gonna miss you all.

1298
01:29:33,755 --> 01:29:35,245
To Georgia!

1299
01:29:36,090 --> 01:29:37,751
To Georgia!

1300
01:29:38,226 --> 01:29:40,126
-To Irv!
-To the Irvinator.

1301
01:29:41,896 --> 01:29:44,490
<i>Okay, so I'm staying in Greece.</i>

1302
01:29:45,600 --> 01:29:47,966
<i>I have no idea what's going to happen.</i>

1303
01:29:48,069 --> 01:29:51,197
<i>But as the man says,
"How do you plan life?"</i>

1304
01:29:51,839 --> 01:29:54,706
<i>I've waited a long time to be this happy.</i>

1305
01:29:55,610 --> 01:29:57,771
<i>And the thing about happy...</i>

1306
01:29:58,446 --> 01:30:00,539
<i>Wait. What was I saying?</i>

1307
01:30:01,182 --> 01:30:03,616
<i>Yeah, I'm gonna enjoy it.</i>

1308
01:30:13,795 --> 01:30:16,229
<i>-Teach me to dance.
-Dance?</i>

1309
01:30:17,231 --> 01:30:19,165
<i>Did you say dance?</i>

1310
01:30:25,273 --> 01:30:27,468
And now we dance.