1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 2 00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,425 [TELEVISION CLICKS ON] 3 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:10,719 [ANNOUNCER] The following is a paid advertisement from Guy Bilzerian. 4 00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:12,554 It is not approved by the New York Bar Association. 5 00:00:12,638 --> 00:00:16,016 I'm Guy Bilzerian, attorney at law and family man. 6 00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:18,185 But I will happily abandon my family 7 00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:20,854 to get you the divorce settlement you deserve. 8 00:00:20,938 --> 00:00:24,274 You might know me from my bench ads, my three delinquent sons, 9 00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:26,652 or my twice-institutionalized wife. 10 00:00:26,735 --> 00:00:29,404 But I want you to know me as your first line of defense 11 00:00:29,488 --> 00:00:32,366 against bitch ex-wives and asshole ex-husbands, 12 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:34,660 'cause I play both sides of the coin. 13 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:36,828 It's the law, not magic, 14 00:00:36,912 --> 00:00:41,083 and anyone who does magic is a disappointment to his father. 15 00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:45,170 Call me today, because marriage is a sham and love dies. 16 00:00:45,254 --> 00:00:46,797 Let's bury the body together. 17 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,341 - Jay, keep rolling. - [JAY] Dad... oh, shit! 18 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,236 We know you threw a party 19 00:01:25,237 --> 00:01:27,337 while we were at your father's cardiology conference. 20 00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,506 We have half a mind not to give you these T-shirts. 21 00:01:29,589 --> 00:01:30,799 It was just a few people. 22 00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,592 Jud, Leah, you're grounded for three weeks. 23 00:01:32,676 --> 00:01:36,805 - Three weeks? That's ridiculous. - Make it four. I'm writing my manifesto. 24 00:01:36,888 --> 00:01:39,558 - What a work ethic on this kid. - Wait, do I not get punished? 25 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:43,478 Aww. Nicky, you're my sweet little pumpkin. 26 00:01:43,562 --> 00:01:46,064 - You're not responsible. - Mom, I'm not a pumpkin. 27 00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:48,233 - Well, you're my baby... - I'm not a baby. 28 00:01:48,317 --> 00:01:50,193 Besides, you can't be grounded. 29 00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:52,237 You need to dance with me at Jessi's bat mitzvah. 30 00:01:52,321 --> 00:01:53,905 And save a dance for me, too. 31 00:01:53,989 --> 00:01:56,408 Did you know that if you raise the roof, when they do that, 32 00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:58,869 then you can lower your arms and it's hugging arms. 33 00:01:58,952 --> 00:01:59,986 [GROANS] 34 00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:02,706 Kids, I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, 35 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,792 but we've all discussed it, and the parents agree 36 00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:07,878 that neither of you are ready to be in a relationship. 37 00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:09,838 - What? - But we are ready! 38 00:02:09,921 --> 00:02:11,256 We just won't lie to you anymore. 39 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:13,675 And what about the mons pushing? 40 00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:15,802 - What the hell's a mons? - Oh, we don't need... 41 00:02:15,886 --> 00:02:19,473 A mons push is a preamble to sexual intercourse. 42 00:02:19,556 --> 00:02:21,850 - Mom! - Oh, God, our son is a deviant. 43 00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:25,145 What'd you do to her, you pervert? Corrupting this little girl. 44 00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:27,606 Look at her, she's a child. 45 00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,358 But she's six months older than me. 46 00:02:29,441 --> 00:02:31,193 Know what they do to pedophiles in the big house? 47 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,195 - Okay... - Shank 'em in the shower 48 00:02:33,278 --> 00:02:35,822 and turn their pee into wine. That's what they do. 49 00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:38,408 We just think the kids need to stop seeing each other. 50 00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:41,328 - Missy, let's go. - I'm sorry. 51 00:02:41,411 --> 00:02:43,830 - Goodbye, Andrew. - Goodbye, Missy. 52 00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:46,583 No! Missy! 53 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:47,765 Why don't you go outside, 54 00:02:47,766 --> 00:02:50,253 push that mons of yours against the lawnmower? 55 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:53,590 - It's nighttime. - Isn't that when you perverts go out? 56 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:57,844 I finally agree to let your dumbass friends play Jessi's bat mitzvah 57 00:02:57,928 --> 00:03:00,722 - and they back out at the last minute? - Chill, Shannon. 58 00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:03,141 You know what makes a woman not want to chill, Greg? 59 00:03:03,225 --> 00:03:05,060 Having a man tell her to chill. 60 00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:06,812 I can't believe my mom. 61 00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:10,482 She kisses some lady on the street, now she's being mean to Dad? 62 00:03:10,565 --> 00:03:14,236 That is fucked up, but who is the lady? 63 00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:16,947 I don't know. I never even thought about that. 64 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,865 The party is tomorrow! 65 00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:20,450 We all know that, everyone knows that! 66 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:23,787 - Guys, stop yelling. - Honey, we're not yelling. [CHUCKLES] 67 00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:27,666 We're discussing the logistics for the best day of your life. 68 00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:29,668 Best day of your life? Hah! 69 00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:31,378 Your parents keep fighting, 70 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:34,464 you got a big ol' pimple percolatin' on your forehead, 71 00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:37,759 and crooked Shannon forced you to buy that dress 72 00:03:37,843 --> 00:03:40,679 - that makes your torso look boxy. - You don't like the dress? 73 00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:43,724 It doesn't work! It never worked! 74 00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:47,185 I hate my life, and I hate my dress! 75 00:03:47,269 --> 00:03:48,645 The dress looks great. 76 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:51,606 Just take a deep breath and relax. 77 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:54,776 You know what makes a person not want to relax, Shannon? 78 00:03:54,860 --> 00:03:57,320 - Nice turn. - Shut up, Dad! 79 00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:59,865 Burn the house to the ground! 80 00:03:59,948 --> 00:04:02,826 Use the boxy dress as kindling. 81 00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:05,829 It's so annoying. She treats me like I'm a little kid. 82 00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:10,041 You are a little kid. I saw your dick, remember? [LAUGHS] 83 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:14,087 - You guys could be prosecuted for that. - Where, in ghost court? 84 00:04:14,171 --> 00:04:18,091 Hey! Ghost Court, that's a good idea for a TV show! 85 00:04:18,175 --> 00:04:21,553 Nick, you got to contact my agent, Jew Fishman. 86 00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:23,305 He'll work out the details. 87 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:24,556 - [LAUGHS] - [KNOCK ON DOOR] 88 00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:28,310 Hi, sweetie. Just wanted to say good night. 89 00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,915 Actually, I don't really feel comfortable 90 00:04:30,916 --> 00:04:32,105 kissing you on the lips anymore. 91 00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:33,356 Is that okay? 92 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:36,026 Okay, sure. Yeah, of course. 93 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:39,529 Um, how about I just tuck you in, kiddo, okay, and I'll be on my way? 94 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:41,141 You know, I actually think I got it. 95 00:04:41,142 --> 00:04:42,824 Just gotta pull the blanket up a bit. 96 00:04:42,908 --> 00:04:44,659 Okay, great, fantastic. 97 00:04:44,743 --> 00:04:46,703 - So... good night, Nicky. - Nick. 98 00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:49,206 I think I'd like you to call me Nick from now on. 99 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,123 Okay, Nick. 100 00:04:50,207 --> 00:04:51,458 - Good night, Diane. - Watch it. 101 00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:53,877 [MUFFLED SOB] 102 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,297 What the hell did you just do to your mama? 103 00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:58,381 I'm setting some boundaries. 104 00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:00,801 That woman loves you unconditionally. 105 00:05:00,884 --> 00:05:04,805 When you were a baby, she made you personalized tittie cocktails. 106 00:05:04,888 --> 00:05:06,264 Are you talking about breast feeding? 107 00:05:06,348 --> 00:05:08,850 Yecch! It's gross when you say it. 108 00:05:08,934 --> 00:05:11,937 I'm getting older, and I don't want to be babied anymore. 109 00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:16,149 I drank my mommy's boobie juice till I was 12 years old. 110 00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:21,488 ♪ And no woman ever measured up ♪ ♪ To the love of my life ♪ 111 00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:23,615 ♪ My mommy ♪ 112 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:25,158 Huge breasts! 113 00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:26,618 - [DOOR SHUTS] - [SOBBING] 114 00:05:26,701 --> 00:05:28,078 What's wrong, my love? 115 00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:30,413 I feel like Nicky just broke up with me. 116 00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:32,087 He doesn't want me to tuck him in anymore, 117 00:05:32,088 --> 00:05:34,376 doesn't even want me to call him Nicky. 118 00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:37,963 [SIGHS] Diane, we have to let our baby bird leave the nest. 119 00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:41,007 I know, but... but when he's gone, 120 00:05:41,091 --> 00:05:43,802 there will be no more babies to take care of. 121 00:05:43,885 --> 00:05:46,680 You can take care of me. You want me to dress up like a baby? 122 00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:48,848 You're such a weird perv sometimes. 123 00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:51,601 Aww, you remember our vows, Mommy. 124 00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,979 [CRYING] 125 00:05:54,938 --> 00:05:55,938 [HORN HONKS] 126 00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:59,234 Oh, please, if you're so handicapped maybe you shouldn't be driving! 127 00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:00,485 [GROANS] 128 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:04,573 We are so square. We look like a couple of Fig Newtons. 129 00:06:04,656 --> 00:06:05,657 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 130 00:06:05,740 --> 00:06:07,242 - Hey, Jess. - Hey, Cantor Dina. 131 00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:10,954 Wow! Really good vibes in this room. Yes! 132 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:13,957 FYI, we're gonna begin the journey in five minutes. 133 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:16,209 - Okay. - Or as we say in the theater, 134 00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,837 - "Thank you, five." - Okay. 135 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,714 You have to say it back to me. 136 00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:23,341 - Thank you, five? - Shalom. 137 00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:25,552 - Found you! - [GROANS] 138 00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:26,886 No. Why? 139 00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:29,973 Listen, I know I'm not supposed to see the bat before the mitzvah, 140 00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:31,933 but ta-da... oww! 141 00:06:32,017 --> 00:06:33,852 Jesus, fuck! 142 00:06:33,935 --> 00:06:37,355 - [GROANS] Please don't give me flowers. - What? I can't help it. 143 00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:38,857 I mean, look at you. 144 00:06:38,940 --> 00:06:42,277 You're like a square, sexy box. 145 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:44,273 I just want to, like, take you to FedEx 146 00:06:44,274 --> 00:06:45,864 and fill you full of packing peanuts. 147 00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:49,826 Stop! I hate this dress. My stupid mother made me get it. 148 00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:51,703 Oh, yeah, moms are so stupid. 149 00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:53,538 They're always passing out drunk in the bath 150 00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:55,915 instead of signing your field trip permission slip. 151 00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:58,335 Oh, Jay, that is real bleak. 152 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:01,421 Look, could we just cool it with the romantic gestures, okay? 153 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:04,758 As you wish, my boxy Jewess. 154 00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:08,470 Wha... aah! Oh! 155 00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:11,932 - Andrew, what are you doing? - I missed you, Missy. 156 00:07:12,015 --> 00:07:13,600 Yeah, I missed you, too. 157 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:15,977 Our parents are being crazy, right? 158 00:07:16,061 --> 00:07:18,813 You want to be with me, and I want to be with you. 159 00:07:18,897 --> 00:07:20,982 What if we... What if we dated in secret? 160 00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:24,235 Ohh. You mean like Fatima and Gustavo? 161 00:07:24,319 --> 00:07:26,529 Yes, except, of course, I won't be a horse. 162 00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:29,324 Yeah, but you're hung like one. Reveal your meat. 163 00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:32,118 Wowzie-wow, forbidden lovers? 164 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:35,872 I can tell that I'm genuinely excited because my back is really sweaty. 165 00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:39,376 - Oh. Shall I dab it with my tallit? - [CHUCKLES] 166 00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:40,961 Is that kosher? 167 00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:45,131 I don't know, but I feel like we're breaking all the rules today. 168 00:07:45,215 --> 00:07:46,254 Ooh... 169 00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,382 [MARTY] Andrew, where are you? 170 00:07:47,383 --> 00:07:50,053 I'm done fighting over the handicapped spot. 171 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:53,473 - I'll find you later, Fatima. - [MUFFLED SCREAM] 172 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:55,892 Sorry, a lot of feelings. Ooh! 173 00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:59,729 ♪ We gather all together ♪ 174 00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:04,401 ♪ The mothers and the fathers ♪ Uh-huh. 175 00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:07,070 Hey, that singing rabbi up there, does she look familiar? 176 00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:10,448 That's the cantor. She just does the "music." 177 00:08:10,532 --> 00:08:13,827 - That's a whole job? - Exactly. It's a scam! 178 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:18,081 - Like soap. Soap is lard. - Marty, be quiet! 179 00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:22,335 Ooh, I spoke to Greg. There will be no scallops at this bat mitzvah. 180 00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:24,921 Thank goodness. Last time, we had to throw away your suit. 181 00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,507 And my shoes. Don't forget my shoes. 182 00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:29,342 They were like the spill tray. 183 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:33,054 Hey, does this church serve those, uh, wafers? 184 00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:35,849 - I didn't eat breakfast. - Oh, you poor starving thing. 185 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:37,892 Let me see what I've got in my purse here. 186 00:08:37,976 --> 00:08:40,562 - Aw, thanks, Mrs. Birch. - Here. Call me Diane. 187 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:42,605 Okay, Mommy. [SNARLING AND MUNCHING] 188 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,276 Psst! Hey, let's sneak off with Missy 189 00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:49,529 while your dad is scratching what appears to be a troll's foot. 190 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:52,240 - Hmm... - [GASPS] 191 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,826 So I'm Cantor Dina Reznick, 192 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:59,581 and I have had the distinct honor of being Jessi's guide. 193 00:08:59,664 --> 00:09:03,376 I don't know what it is, but I do not like that woman. 194 00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:06,421 And it's been a real simcha, right, Jess? 195 00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:10,258 She's the worst. I hate how she "huchs" her words. 196 00:09:10,341 --> 00:09:12,635 She should shut the fucch up. 197 00:09:13,428 --> 00:09:14,468 - Hi. - Hi. 198 00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:17,682 - I can't believe we're alone. - We can do whatever we want. 199 00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,684 Do you boys need a yarmulke? 200 00:09:19,768 --> 00:09:21,186 No, thank you, Mr. Fishman. 201 00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:23,730 Come on, it's too dangerous out here. Come with me. 202 00:09:23,813 --> 00:09:25,982 Yeah, I'll take a yarmulke, for my Jewish penis. 203 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,026 Thank you! 204 00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:30,236 I use it to cover my bald spot. 205 00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:33,281 And now, for the first aliyah, 206 00:09:33,364 --> 00:09:36,409 I'd like to invite up Jessi's beautiful mother Shannon 207 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:37,827 and her husband Greg. 208 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:41,915 [KISSING AND MOANING] 209 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:45,293 Oh, uh... don't worry, I won't mons push you this time. 210 00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,879 You can mons push me all you want. 211 00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:49,005 [CHUCKLING] 212 00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,883 - Look at her pawing at your mama. - Seriously. 213 00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:54,385 That's a very long hug. 214 00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:57,013 [KISSING] 215 00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,974 Andrew, isn't that your jazz hat? 216 00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:01,075 Huh. 217 00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:03,937 [NICK] That's Jessi's mom. 218 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:05,647 Oh, God. 219 00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:07,524 Oh, my God. 220 00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:10,276 It's her. 221 00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,112 Jessi... Jessi... 222 00:10:12,195 --> 00:10:13,404 - Jessi. - Huh? 223 00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:15,657 So it's time for you to read your Torah portion. 224 00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:16,866 I... I... 225 00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,285 - I can't do it. - Yes, you can. 226 00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:23,456 You are a woman now, and this is what women do. 227 00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:27,961 We suck up all the bullshit that the world dumps up on us 228 00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:31,798 and keep smiling through it all in our boxy-ass dresses! 229 00:10:31,881 --> 00:10:34,217 Amen. 230 00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:38,138 Jessi, I loved it. A few small thoughts... 231 00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:41,474 You sang great. The breath in here is... it's terrible. 232 00:10:41,558 --> 00:10:43,977 Jessi, mazel tov. I have to tell you something. 233 00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,770 That cantor lady, she... 234 00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:47,939 She's the woman you saw kissing my mom, isn't she? 235 00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:49,732 Holy shit, she is! 236 00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,152 Oh, my God, I can't believe it! 237 00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:55,196 Barbara, I lost a sock in the pews again. 238 00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:57,532 [AIRHORN SAMPLE BLARING] 239 00:10:57,615 --> 00:11:00,285 DJ Pendejo coming at you! 240 00:11:00,368 --> 00:11:03,163 If you have any music requests, come talk to me. 241 00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:04,747 Do not write them down. 242 00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:08,751 And make sure I can see your lips because I am losing my hearing. 243 00:11:08,835 --> 00:11:11,421 This is how you handled it, Greg? 244 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,840 Give me a break. He said he'd do it for free. 245 00:11:13,923 --> 00:11:15,717 Oh, I don't get paid by the school either. 246 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:19,804 I'm what's known in the business world as, uh, a volunteer person. 247 00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:22,140 Who the hell is Malala? 248 00:11:22,223 --> 00:11:24,350 She's just this girl who got shot in the face 249 00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:26,352 'cause she read a book and now she's super famous. 250 00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:28,980 - Lucky Malala. - That's what they call her. 251 00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:32,901 Diane, I got you a glass of Pinot gris with two ice cubes, 252 00:11:32,984 --> 00:11:35,778 - just the way you like it. - Wow. Thank you, Jay. 253 00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,780 That is so sweet. 254 00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:39,616 Jay, why are you bringing my mom drinks? 255 00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,868 Because she rocks. Not that you care. 256 00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:43,712 I watch how you treat her with all the cameras 257 00:11:43,713 --> 00:11:44,871 I hid all over your house. 258 00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:47,999 - It's fucked up, bro. - Just stay away from her, okay? 259 00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:51,085 And for the last time, get rid of the cameras in my house. 260 00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:53,546 Whatever, man. At the end of the night, 261 00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:56,090 we'll see who's seeing who get tucked in. 262 00:11:56,174 --> 00:11:57,717 - Please. - He's right. 263 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,303 You don't appreciate your mama. 264 00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:02,305 Do you boys need a yarmulke? 265 00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:05,808 Well, I'll be! It's Jew Fishman, my agent. 266 00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:08,394 Jew, I want to pitch a show to Merv Griffin. 267 00:12:08,478 --> 00:12:10,647 It's called Ghost Court. I could be the judge. 268 00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:14,400 - Do you boys need a yarmulke? - Jew's gone senile. 269 00:12:14,484 --> 00:12:17,487 Jew, can you even remember the name of my first single? 270 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,656 Do you boys need a yarmulke? 271 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:23,910 Oh, good, he still remembers some things. [CHUCKLES] 272 00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:26,996 Scallops, sir? 273 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,998 Scallops, what are you doing here? 274 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:32,669 - Would you like one? - Oh. That's a very complicated question. 275 00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:35,421 Marty. It's us, Marty. 276 00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:38,091 - Have a taste. - You know you love our texture. 277 00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:39,801 Stop that, please, all of you. 278 00:12:39,884 --> 00:12:42,804 I'm married, for chrissakes, and these are new shoes. 279 00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:44,764 - Rockports... - 9 1/2... 280 00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:48,017 - Extra wide. - Ooh, that's right. 281 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:51,604 Enough to keep eight packs of Rolaids in. You know me so well. 282 00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:54,941 Hey, why don't you meet us at the dumpster after cocktail hour? 283 00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:57,193 - You won't regret it. - Ohh... 284 00:12:57,276 --> 00:13:01,948 All right, round up the Jews and make 'em walk in a line. 285 00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:06,077 Choo-choo! Get on the train, Jews, it's time to dance! 286 00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:08,663 - [HAVA NAGILA PLAYING] - You can't hide from the party police. 287 00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:11,708 That's right. I'm looking at you, Anne Frank table. 288 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:15,461 Why am I oddly offended we're not being rounded up as well? 289 00:13:15,545 --> 00:13:16,963 I'm just here for the open bar. 290 00:13:17,922 --> 00:13:21,050 This is great. Everyone thinks we're just holding hands 291 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,720 when, really, we're holding hands. 292 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:27,724 - I never wanna let go of you. - Never's a really long time. 293 00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:30,977 - Not when I'm with you. - Oh, I'm getting dizzy. 294 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:32,645 It's moving really fast, right? 295 00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:35,648 It's a magical night. Don't you agree, Connie? 296 00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:38,401 Not now, Maury. I've got my hands full. 297 00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:41,480 Look at her, flaunting her indiscretions 298 00:13:41,481 --> 00:13:43,823 like a pair of diamond earrings. 299 00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:45,283 [LAUGHING] 300 00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:47,452 Oh, I'm having so much fun! 301 00:13:47,535 --> 00:13:49,287 Oh. That's nice, sweetie. 302 00:13:49,370 --> 00:13:51,748 Everyone keeps saying how much we look alike. 303 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:53,583 Mom, stop it, you're embarrassing me. 304 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:57,128 Nicky, it's the horah. Everybody's dancing. 305 00:13:57,211 --> 00:13:59,547 - You can join us if you like. - I don't want to dance. 306 00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:02,300 Well, then you don't have to. Come on, honey. 307 00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:06,554 Spoiler alert: it's time to get Jessi on the chair 308 00:14:06,637 --> 00:14:08,473 for the Jewish push-'em-up. 309 00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,308 Wait, wait, no, please don't. 310 00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:13,144 Aah! 311 00:14:14,437 --> 00:14:15,480 Aaah! 312 00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:18,608 - Huh? - Open up, jellybean. 313 00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:21,277 - Babe. - Oh, come on. 314 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:24,197 Jessi, your parents are very much in love. 315 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:25,782 You'll just have to get used to that. 316 00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,200 Aaah! 317 00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:30,203 Oh, babe, I was gonna watch a Sublime documentary tonight. 318 00:14:30,286 --> 00:14:33,956 It's just one client dinner, two hours, and can you not... ? 319 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:37,543 You got it. I'll just practice "Santeria" some other time, then. 320 00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:42,507 - My dad was a lemon. - My dad was a purple. 321 00:14:42,590 --> 00:14:44,217 Actually, your dad is a lemon. 322 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:45,802 - Okay, Shannon. - Okay, Greg. 323 00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,889 - [CHEERS AND LAUGHTER] - Put me down. Please put me down! 324 00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:54,143 Mazel tov on your boxy dress! 325 00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:55,261 [GROANS] 326 00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:58,064 Hey, come on, no one's in the photo booth. 327 00:14:58,147 --> 00:14:59,315 [PANTING] 328 00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:02,402 - I feel like I can't breathe. - I know, me too. 329 00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:05,738 No, really, I feel like maybe we should go back to the people. 330 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:08,366 I'm seeing sparkles, and my stomach is all swirly. 331 00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:09,742 It... it's so exciting. 332 00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:12,995 I can already picture us getting married and having children 333 00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:14,182 and then they'll get married... 334 00:15:14,183 --> 00:15:15,998 well, not to each other, to other people. 335 00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,542 - Oh, life. - Oh, Lordy. 336 00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:21,170 The thing I'm trying to say is I... I love you. 337 00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:24,132 - What? - [DISTORTED] I love you... 338 00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:28,928 [CAMERA SHUTTER WHIRRING] 339 00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:34,559 Sorry, got a little handsy with Jessi's bubbie on the dance floor. 340 00:15:34,642 --> 00:15:37,186 She's ten pounds of dynamite in a five pound bag. 341 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,564 - What'd I miss? - I told her I loved her. 342 00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:42,066 Jessi's bubbie? 'Cause get in line, Larry. 343 00:15:42,150 --> 00:15:44,610 No, I told Missy I loved her. 344 00:15:44,694 --> 00:15:46,529 - Why? - Because I do. 345 00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:48,865 Who the fuck cares? It's way too soon. 346 00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:51,701 You might be right. [SOBS] She barfed. 347 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:55,246 You idiot! She's a delicate orchid who needs to be gently misted, 348 00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:58,749 and you unleashed a fire hose of Monster Energy drink on her. 349 00:15:58,833 --> 00:16:00,960 Which is great for people but not for orchids. 350 00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:02,503 Take it from this monster. 351 00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:05,047 Are you trying to get sponsored by Monster Energy drink? 352 00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:07,800 - Stay focused, Andrew. You fucked up. - I know that. 353 00:16:07,884 --> 00:16:11,387 Monster Energy, brings out the monster in you. 354 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:13,303 Brings out the monster... Uh... 355 00:16:13,304 --> 00:16:15,349 Let me just try this one more time here. 356 00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:18,352 Brings out the monster in you! Yeah, nailed it. 357 00:16:18,436 --> 00:16:20,021 Get my agent. Where's Jew Fishman? 358 00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:24,484 Mmm... 359 00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:27,653 - What are you doing out here? - Nothing. I'm doing nothing. 360 00:16:27,737 --> 00:16:29,363 You know I love you, right, Barbara? 361 00:16:29,447 --> 00:16:31,491 Love me? Ugh! Marty, don't be weird. 362 00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:32,783 [SIGHS] 363 00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:36,496 J is for Jessi, the girl everyone loves. 364 00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:39,999 E is for everyone, the people who love Jessi. 365 00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:44,420 S is for slut. It's what everyone says Jessi is. 366 00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:46,797 - Lola! - What? 367 00:16:46,881 --> 00:16:48,591 [CHUCKLING] 368 00:16:49,383 --> 00:16:51,385 She's rubbing our faces in it, 369 00:16:51,469 --> 00:16:54,597 just like she rubbed her face in Cantor Dina's... 370 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:59,435 - Okay, okay. - What? I was gonna say mons pubis. 371 00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:01,646 Mom, I need to talk to you. 372 00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:03,189 - What's wrong, Jessi Bear? - Now. 373 00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:07,610 - I know everything! - What? What do you mean? 374 00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:10,696 I know you're cheating on Daddy with Cantor Dina. 375 00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:14,283 Okay, Jessi, let's just take a deep breath. 376 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:17,203 This whole time, you guys have been... ? 377 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,872 What are you? You're, like, a lesbian now? 378 00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:22,792 [STAMMERS] 379 00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:25,670 I don't know. I'm still figuring things out. 380 00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:27,463 But what about you and Daddy? 381 00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:30,675 Your father and I have been struggling for a long time. 382 00:17:30,758 --> 00:17:33,344 Do you even... [SIGHS] do you even love him anymore? 383 00:17:33,427 --> 00:17:34,804 I don't know. 384 00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:38,057 [COUGHING] Whoa. 385 00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:40,560 That's heavy. 386 00:17:40,643 --> 00:17:44,564 Now I can see the family's having a particularly tense moment, 387 00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:49,151 so it's the perfect time for a speech from Mom and Dad! 388 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:51,821 - [CLEARS THROAT] - [MIC FEEDBACK] 389 00:17:51,904 --> 00:17:54,657 Jessi, you were so amazing today. 390 00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:57,243 You really did Eleanor Roosevelt proud. 391 00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:58,411 She did, didn't she? 392 00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,413 Shannon, can I see the mic for a second? 393 00:18:00,496 --> 00:18:04,333 - Greg, we agreed I would speak. - Oh, we agreed on a lot of stuff. 394 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,335 - Gimme, gimme! Just gimme. - [SOFT FEEDBACK SQUEAL] 395 00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:09,463 - Don't worry, Daddy, I got two mics. - Oh, Jesus. 396 00:18:09,547 --> 00:18:12,842 Jesus? Not in this house of worship. Am I right? 397 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:16,596 Honestly, am I right? I... I don't know the different ones. 398 00:18:16,679 --> 00:18:18,848 [AIRHORN SAMPLE BLARING] 399 00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:22,727 Jellybean, wow. You've grown up so fast. 400 00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:24,759 It's like one of those Internet videos 401 00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:26,939 where they take a picture every day. 402 00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:29,191 A different picture every day, you show them together real fast, 403 00:18:29,275 --> 00:18:31,777 it looks like the guy, like, grows a beard right in front of you. 404 00:18:31,861 --> 00:18:34,196 - Greg. - I remember when we brought you home. 405 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,449 We were so happy. 406 00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:38,242 But things are so different now. 407 00:18:38,326 --> 00:18:40,995 I mean, not necessarily worse, but, uh... 408 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:42,538 What are we talking about? Yeah, they're worse. 409 00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,665 [NERVOUS CHUCKLE] Right, Shannon? You made it worse. 410 00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:47,376 - Greg, please give me the mic. - It's my turn to talk. 411 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,837 - Chill, Greg. - Don't tell my dad to chill. 412 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:53,090 Yeah, shove it up your cantor ass, Cantor Dina. 413 00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:55,051 Greg, that is uncalled for. 414 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:57,678 Can everyone please stop saying my name like that, 415 00:18:57,762 --> 00:19:01,307 - like... like I'm some kind of maniac? - Then stop acting like one, Greg! 416 00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:02,725 [WOMAN] Oh, boy. 417 00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:04,352 [AIRHORN SAMPLE BLARING] 418 00:19:04,435 --> 00:19:06,187 I may not know how to read, 419 00:19:06,270 --> 00:19:10,399 but I do know how to read a room... Greg. 420 00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:13,653 Now it's time to dance the Electric Slide. 421 00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:15,112 [DANCE MUSIC PLAYING] 422 00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:17,698 Are we really gonna do the Electric Slide right now? 423 00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:20,159 I guess. It is a bat mitzvah. 424 00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:27,541 ♪ Love doesn't last forever ♪ ♪ It will die and break your heart ♪ 425 00:19:27,625 --> 00:19:31,754 ♪ And you can't have a sexual awakening ♪ ♪ Without tearing lives apart ♪ 426 00:19:32,421 --> 00:19:36,550 ♪ Take your mom for granted ♪ ♪ And you'll lose her in due time ♪ 427 00:19:36,634 --> 00:19:42,348 ♪ The only way to dull that pain ♪ ♪ Is get stoned out of your mind ♪ 428 00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:43,432 ♪ Whoo! ♪ 429 00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:47,019 ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ 430 00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:52,191 ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ ♪ Oh, it's a shitshow ♪ 431 00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:56,696 ♪ Never share your feelings ♪ ♪ Or life will kick you in the face ♪ 432 00:19:56,779 --> 00:20:01,117 ♪ Sometimes everything moves so fast ♪ ♪ You throw up all over the place ♪ 433 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:05,538 ♪ Children grow up and abandon you ♪ ♪ To die broken and alone ♪ 434 00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:11,127 ♪ Scallops take you to paradise ♪ ♪ But your asshole will atone ♪ 435 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:12,253 ♪ Whoo! ♪ 436 00:20:12,378 --> 00:20:16,632 - ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ - ♪ People are horrible ♪ 437 00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:20,553 ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ ♪ Oh, it's a shitshow ♪ 438 00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:23,389 - ♪ It's all just heartbreak and misery ♪ - ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ 439 00:20:23,472 --> 00:20:26,225 - ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ - ♪ No one is truly happy ♪ 440 00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:27,893 ♪ Life is a fucked up mess ♪ 441 00:20:27,977 --> 00:20:30,646 ♪ And it doesn't get any better ♪ ♪ When you're dead ♪ 442 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,523 [LAUGHING] 443 00:20:33,357 --> 00:20:35,109 [MUSIC PLAYING] 444 00:20:36,986 --> 00:20:39,572 Go, talk to your mama, Nick. 445 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:42,324 - You only get one mother. - Jew Fishman? 446 00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:45,786 The bad news is Jew passed away during the horah. 447 00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:48,581 The good news is Ghost Court is back on! 448 00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:50,916 We're gonna get Duke points on the back end. 449 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,668 I'm happy for you guys. I'm... 450 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,420 I'm gonna go talk to my mom. 451 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:57,006 Jay, I need a minute with my mom. 452 00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:59,842 - Is this guy bothering you, Diane? - Not at all. This guy's my son. 453 00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:02,720 That's right, and she's my mom. I'm really lucky to have her. 454 00:21:02,803 --> 00:21:04,972 She's a good mom. Take care of her, okay? 455 00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:07,183 Okay, Jay, just get lost. 456 00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,560 Mom, will you please dance with me? 457 00:21:09,643 --> 00:21:11,812 - I would love to, Nick. - You can call me Nicky. 458 00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:13,856 - Okay, Nicky. - All right, Diane. 459 00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:16,025 Seriously, cut that shit out. 460 00:21:16,984 --> 00:21:19,278 - What about me? - Come here, son. 461 00:21:19,361 --> 00:21:21,864 - I'll be your mom. - This is nice. 462 00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:25,034 You're wrong, Jay. It's dynamite. 463 00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:33,417 - Ooh! - We knew you'd come. 464 00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:36,128 Why don't you slip us inside you? 465 00:21:37,755 --> 00:21:39,882 Oh, my God! What am I doing? 466 00:21:39,965 --> 00:21:41,550 I'm an angrily married man. 467 00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:43,636 - Marty. - You know you want us. 468 00:21:43,719 --> 00:21:46,096 Damn it! There comes a time in every man's life 469 00:21:46,180 --> 00:21:49,850 when he must choose between his wife and guaranteed automatic diarrhea. 470 00:21:49,934 --> 00:21:53,062 - It'll be our secret. - No one has to know. 471 00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:56,190 I would know, and so would my wife. 472 00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:59,443 Because of the relentless fecal explosion. 473 00:21:59,527 --> 00:22:03,656 - [GRUNTS] - [SOBBING] Marty, what are you doing? 474 00:22:03,739 --> 00:22:06,659 What? You've never seen a hormone monster's Jewish penis 475 00:22:06,742 --> 00:22:08,285 eat dumpster scallops? 476 00:22:08,369 --> 00:22:09,578 Get a life. 477 00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:11,956 Give me Malala! 478 00:22:12,039 --> 00:22:15,000 I will kick you in the pussy, you stupid shit. 479 00:22:15,084 --> 00:22:17,044 At least I still have a pussy. 480 00:22:17,127 --> 00:22:19,421 Maury, we need to talk. 481 00:22:19,505 --> 00:22:21,507 Oh, shit. This is bad. 482 00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:23,717 - Hi, Andrew. - Hi, Missy. 483 00:22:23,801 --> 00:22:26,637 Listen, um, about what I said in the photo booth, 484 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,180 let's just pretend it didn't happen. 485 00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:31,183 Oh, but it did. We need to face it. 486 00:22:31,267 --> 00:22:33,352 Andrew, you're like sugar to me. 487 00:22:33,435 --> 00:22:36,355 I like you, but every time I have you, I lose control, 488 00:22:36,438 --> 00:22:38,899 and I... I hate to say it, but I end up regretting it. 489 00:22:38,983 --> 00:22:41,068 - But, Missy... - My parents were right. 490 00:22:41,151 --> 00:22:43,529 We need to break up. For real this time. 491 00:22:43,612 --> 00:22:45,197 No, don't say that. We can fix this. 492 00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:47,449 - Connie, please? - I lost her, Maury. 493 00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:49,368 For, at least, the next few years. 494 00:22:49,451 --> 00:22:52,663 She came in hot, but burned out bright. 495 00:22:52,746 --> 00:22:55,583 Missy, come on, I don't need to be sugar. 496 00:22:55,666 --> 00:22:57,084 I can be raisins. 497 00:22:57,167 --> 00:23:01,589 Oh, Andrew. Raisins are chock-full of natural sugar. 498 00:23:01,672 --> 00:23:04,008 I'm sorry, there's no way around it. 499 00:23:04,091 --> 00:23:06,093 You're just too sweet for me. 500 00:23:07,011 --> 00:23:10,556 With all due respect, Connie, this girl's a little fucking cunt. 501 00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:12,808 And me and the boy are gonna kill ourselves tonight. 502 00:23:12,891 --> 00:23:16,020 Yeah, I get it. You do you, Maury. You gotta do you. 503 00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:18,230 Well, Steve, you did it. 504 00:23:18,314 --> 00:23:19,690 I really did, didn't I? 505 00:23:19,773 --> 00:23:23,152 You played the wrong music, constantly referenced the Holocaust, 506 00:23:23,235 --> 00:23:25,529 and you appear to have killed an old man. 507 00:23:25,613 --> 00:23:26,655 Congratulations. 508 00:23:26,739 --> 00:23:29,408 Thanks, Matthew. That really means the world. 509 00:23:29,491 --> 00:23:33,037 I truly envy your ability to bat away every one of my insults. 510 00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:34,830 Right back at you, my dude. 511 00:23:35,998 --> 00:23:37,333 [SIGHS] 512 00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:40,586 - [CLEARS THROAT] - That's not really gonna keep me warm. 513 00:23:40,669 --> 00:23:43,505 Can't you let me do nice things? [GROANS] God! 514 00:23:43,589 --> 00:23:46,634 - Today sucked. - Your parents' speech was weird. 515 00:23:46,717 --> 00:23:48,969 - I know. You have no idea. - I kinda do. 516 00:23:49,053 --> 00:23:52,181 I'm pretty sure my dad cheats on my mom, like, all the time. 517 00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:54,391 He makes me wait in the car while he does it. 518 00:23:54,475 --> 00:23:56,518 Oh, Jay, I'm... I'm sorry. 519 00:23:56,602 --> 00:23:58,646 Eh, don't be. Love dies. 520 00:23:58,729 --> 00:24:00,939 Let's bury the body together. 521 00:24:01,023 --> 00:24:03,359 Stop quoting your dad's law commercials. 522 00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:06,028 Kiss him. Kiss him hard on the mouth. 523 00:24:08,906 --> 00:24:12,409 Oh, my God, I can't believe this is happening again! 524 00:24:12,493 --> 00:24:14,203 Shut up and kiss me. 525 00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:18,248 Now stick your pinkie in his little toffee-colored tushie. 526 00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:20,292 Okay, I learned my lesson. 527 00:24:20,376 --> 00:24:22,878 You just go at your own pace, bubbale. 528 00:24:27,383 --> 00:24:29,009 - Good night, Nicky. - Good night, Mom. 529 00:24:31,261 --> 00:24:33,972 - Good night, Jay. - Good night, Mr. Birch. 530 00:24:34,056 --> 00:24:36,433 I mean, Mom. 531 00:24:37,518 --> 00:24:39,520 - Sour Patch Kid? - Sure. 532 00:24:39,603 --> 00:24:43,357 - Hey, Dad, you're not a lemon. - Thanks, jellybean. 533 00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:45,526 You're my best little girl. 534 00:24:50,489 --> 00:24:52,574 [SOBBING] 535 00:24:54,076 --> 00:24:55,577 [CRYING] 536 00:24:55,661 --> 00:24:59,081 - [HOWLS] - Oh, I knew it was too good to be true. 537 00:24:59,164 --> 00:25:01,041 It's worse than I thought. 538 00:25:01,125 --> 00:25:03,711 - And I knew it was gonna end badly. - [SNIFFLES] 539 00:25:03,794 --> 00:25:07,172 - You did? - Of course. You're such a fucking dork! 540 00:25:07,256 --> 00:25:10,008 - I know. - Aww, come here. 541 00:25:10,092 --> 00:25:12,428 [BOTH SOBBING] 542 00:25:16,265 --> 00:25:20,185 ["I WANT TO KNOW WHAT LOVE IS" PLAYING] 543 00:25:20,186 --> 00:25:25,186 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -