1
00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:15,360
Give it to me straight.

2
00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:17,720
Virginal bride, or...

3
00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:19,560
slut in white?

4
00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:21,720
He is so lucky.

5
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:34,800
You okay in there?

6
00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:36,440
I feel sick.

7
00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:40,720
You're getting nervous.

8
00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:44,320
You remember last year when Jesse
and I broke up for a couple of weeks...

9
00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:47,800
and I thought she spent
those two weeks in bed...

10
00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:49,520
sad and depressed?

11
00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:52,360
- Yeah.
- This morning she tells me...

12
00:01:52,520 --> 00:01:55,840
out of the blue that she spent
one of those weeks in bed with Jake Lee.

13
00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:59,160
- What did you do?
- Nothing.

14
00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:03,720
Good. That's good. So, what's wrong?

15
00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:05,920
She slept with Jake Lee.

16
00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,760
She slept with him for like a week.

17
00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:12,120
How am I supposed to live with that?
What if all this is a mistake?

18
00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:14,040
Come on,
you would've known that by now.

19
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:17,120
- Am I overreacting?
- Yes, you are.

20
00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:19,480
Come on, man,
it's not like she actually cheated.

21
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:22,080
I mean, you know, you had broken up.

22
00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:23,600
Right.

23
00:02:24,040 --> 00:02:25,440
What would you do?

24
00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:29,160
I'd be happy, man.

25
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:32,400
I mean, it's Jesse.
Everyone you know wants Jesse.

26
00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:35,400
- What do you mean by that?
- I didn't... I didn't...

27
00:02:35,560 --> 00:02:38,560
I didn't mean it like that.
I just...

28
00:02:39,080 --> 00:02:42,200
Look, you wanted this, right?

29
00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:46,320
So, pull yourself together,
go out there and get married.

30
00:02:57,840 --> 00:02:59,480
Ed?

31
00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:01,240
Mr. Allen.

32
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:04,680
You caught me reminiscing.
A lot of memories here.

33
00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:06,240
Buy you a drink?

34
00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:09,800
Oh, I'd love to, Frank, but I'm kind of...
I'm in a bit of a rush.

35
00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:11,160
I insist.

36
00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:14,680
After all, it is the traditional function
of the father of the bride.

37
00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:15,960
What is?

38
00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:17,880
Keeping the groom away from back exits.

39
00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:22,080
No, I was just gonna go outside,
get some air.

40
00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:24,760
Your best tequila, on the rocks.
Come over here a second.

41
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:27,200
- It's tequila, right?
- None for me, thanks.

42
00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:29,120
That's great. He'll have a double.

43
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:31,800
You know, I realize that you don't
know me very well, Ed.

44
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,840
You and Jesse down at school,
my wife and I here, but trust me...

45
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,000
you can talk to me.

46
00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:39,040
Nothing really to talk about, sir.

47
00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:40,600
Doubts?

48
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,680
No, no. No doubts.
No doubt in my mind.

49
00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:46,880
I'm totally doubt-free.
I'm... I'm doubtless.

50
00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:48,600
Yeah.

51
00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:51,320
I'll tell you what.

52
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:55,280
Why don't we make a little list, shall we?

53
00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:57,400
Let's start with doubt number one.

54
00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,000
None.

55
00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:02,480
No, I promise. None.
Number one is "none."

56
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:05,440
Come on, we can do better than that.

57
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,320
What about that thing with Jake Lee?

58
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:12,240
- She told you that?
- Two weeks, last year.

59
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:14,000
Two weeks? She told me a week.

60
00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:18,360
One, two, most of Lent,
that's hardly the point.

61
00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:20,600
That's not why you're eyeing the exit.

62
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,760
Jake Lee's an excuse.

63
00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:25,880
Tell me something, Ed.

64
00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:28,000
Do you love her?

65
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,840
Yeah, of course I do.

66
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,160
Then maybe, just maybe,
you're wondering...

67
00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:36,400
why it isn't pure and constant.

68
00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:39,800
Why all of these ups and downs.
Conviction, then doubt?

69
00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:42,720
How can something that feels
so right one moment...

70
00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:45,360
make you so queasy the next?

71
00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:48,480
Relax.

72
00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:50,600
Life is a mess.

73
00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:56,120
All you have to do is choose to love her
the best way that you know how.

74
00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:59,200
You know,
I've really gotta get out of here.

75
00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:01,240
Thank you for the advice and the drink...

76
00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,280
You know, I've had a marriage
of ups and downs.

77
00:05:05,840 --> 00:05:09,720
Dazzling extremes. Perhaps you've
never heard the full account?

78
00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:12,920
Frankly, Frank, another time.

79
00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:15,640
- Maybe Christmas?
- Not really a Christmas story.

80
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,320
Tell you what.

81
00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:22,320
One says "walk."

82
00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:25,040
And the other says "talk."

83
00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:27,520
Pick one. You choose.

84
00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:30,840
Pick the one that says "walk"
and you'll be free of me.

85
00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:34,240
Pick the one that says "talk"
and, well...

86
00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:37,400
You're kidding, right?

87
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:39,960
No.

88
00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:57,200
I get the feeling sometimes, Mr. Allen,
that you don't like me very much.

89
00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,200
I like Jake Lee.

90
00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:02,160
But my daughter loves you.

91
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,280
Which means you have
a great capacity to hurt her.

92
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:07,280
And you've never done a damn thing
to prove to me that you won't.

93
00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:10,640
Like I said, my marriage...

94
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,520
has been one of extremes.

95
00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:17,200
Certainty and doubt. Deceit and truth.

96
00:06:17,840 --> 00:06:20,000
But it started with truth.

97
00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:23,640
And it started right here in this hotel.

98
00:06:23,840 --> 00:06:26,160
In this very room.

99
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,000
- Hey!
- Hey.

100
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:43,600
- How you doing, man?
- Good.

101
00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:45,720
- Resolutions?
- Yeah.

102
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,480
I always make mine on December 29th.

103
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:50,880
That way I only have 48 hours
to feel bummed about not keeping them.

104
00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:53,080
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

105
00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:55,800
Hey, have you seen Susan yet?

106
00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,360
No, she's always late.
Have you seen her lately?

107
00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,760
No, not since Teddy's party last week.

108
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,320
Teddy had a party?

109
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:03,920
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

110
00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:07,040
- Was she there with anyone, or...?
- No, not really.

111
00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:10,200
Oh. Which is it? "Not" or "really"?

112
00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:12,280
It's hard to say.

113
00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:28,240
Careful, Frank,
she'll leave nothing but your bones.

114
00:07:48,280 --> 00:07:49,400
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

115
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:51,640
- Amen.
- Amen.

116
00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:54,840
All right, okay.
Resolutions, who's got one?

117
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,840
- Sherri?
- Thank you. Take off five pounds.

118
00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,640
- Oh, come on.
- Take it off now.

119
00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:03,440
- Your turn, Frank.
- Okay. I...

120
00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:07,280
I resolve to be bolder.

121
00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:11,480
What a dick. God.

122
00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:14,720
Well, I resolve to fall in love.

123
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,520
Okay.
This is getting a little kinky now, kids.

124
00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:20,440
- That's pretty ambitious.
- I am almost holding your hand.

125
00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:28,640
Okay, next, next. Who, who?

126
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:30,640
- Come on, Susan.
- Okay, okay.

127
00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:35,720
I resolve to buy a motorcycle.
A red Harley.

128
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:39,160
Nice. Nothing nicer or sexier
than a chick on a hog.

129
00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:41,240
I resolve to stop you from doing that.

130
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,360
Why? Don't you like motorcycles
or something?

131
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:46,720
It's just that 95 percent of riders
get injured in the first six months.

132
00:08:46,880 --> 00:08:48,560
- Here we go.
- You memorized the stats?

133
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,800
And 55 percent of riders
get seriously injured.

134
00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:52,240
But it gets better than that.

135
00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:55,160
Do you know what doctors call riders
that don't wear a helmet?

136
00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:56,400
- No, tell us.
- Sexy.

137
00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:58,360
Organ donors.

138
00:08:58,520 --> 00:08:59,920
Organ donors. Yeah.

139
00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:02,520
Just, look, promise me
that you'll always wear a helmet.

140
00:09:02,720 --> 00:09:06,280
Somebody take the pole out of his ass.
Frank, come on, you gotta loosen up, man.

141
00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:09,080
- You take the pole.
- Okay, so I have another resolution.

142
00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:11,560
- An even better one, I think.
- It better be better.

143
00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:13,400
- Does anyone wanna hear it?
- Come on.

144
00:09:13,560 --> 00:09:17,800
Okay. So I resolve to...

145
00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:18,960
find a husband.

146
00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:21,920
- What?
- Yeah. I'm afraid so. It's true.

147
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:27,480
And I've decided
to pick from my friends.

148
00:09:27,680 --> 00:09:31,840
You know, I don't wanna marry
a stranger or anything. So...

149
00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,920
- Who wants to be my husband?
- I do.

150
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:36,200
- I'll do it.
- Me, me, me.

151
00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:39,800
Shit. Oh, God. How will I ever choose?

152
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,840
- By size. By size, boys.
- By size of what, exactly?

153
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,880
- Whatever pleases you the most.
- I don't like guesswork, Buddy.

154
00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:49,520
- There won't be any guesswork involved.
- You just keep Mr. Ed in your pants.

155
00:09:49,680 --> 00:09:52,160
Oh, my God. That's actually
what you call it. Mr. Ed?

156
00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:54,720
- That's charming.
- Wait, that's it. That's perfect.

157
00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:58,160
What could be more revealing about a man?
Best nickname for your dick...

158
00:09:59,520 --> 00:10:01,200
becomes my husband.

159
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,320
Right. Okay, so who's first? Come on.

160
00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,760
Ken, what do you got for me?

161
00:10:05,920 --> 00:10:07,320
Come on, baby.

162
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:09,960
Is it too hard of a question
for you or something?

163
00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:12,280
- Okay.
- What's her name?

164
00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:14,960
I call him...

165
00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:17,680
Squeaky the Bald-Headed Mouse.

166
00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:20,160
- Oh, my God, you don't.
- Because he likes holes.

167
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:23,000
- Are you serious?
- There's an animal theme going on here.

168
00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:25,360
- Buddy? Come on.
- You already know, come on.

169
00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:27,160
What?

170
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,880
It's Master of the Universe,
Defender of our Galaxy.

171
00:10:30,040 --> 00:10:31,960
Oh, shit, man.

172
00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:34,000
Couldn't it be "God Almighty"
or something?

173
00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:37,440
- Well, that's my tongue, actually.
- God. Whatever.

174
00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:40,320
- Okay, Frank?
- Truth.

175
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:42,680
- Yeah, come on, spit it out.
- The truth.

176
00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:45,520
That's... That's what I call it.

177
00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:47,320
Truth.

178
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:51,160
I'm sorry it's not a farm animal.
I'm sorry.

179
00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:53,400
- You should be.
- Ten, nine...

180
00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:56,840
eight, seven, six, five...

181
00:10:57,000 --> 00:11:00,400
four, three, two, one.

182
00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:02,800
Happy New Year!

183
00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,240
It was always gonna be you.

184
00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:34,360
Daddy.

185
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,640
- What is that?
- It's your daughter.

186
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,400
No.

187
00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:41,560
I don't have a daughter this early.

188
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:44,200
- Whatever's there, kill it.
- Hurry.

189
00:11:44,360 --> 00:11:46,360
- It's wide awake.
- We're gonna miss the sun.

190
00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:48,840
Okay, okay, okay. I'm going, I'm going.

191
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,560
Go away.

192
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:52,880
- Hurry, Daddy.
- Let's let Mommy sleep.

193
00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,120
- Hurry.
- Okay.

194
00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:58,160
Come on.

195
00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:04,320
Okay, okay, okay.

196
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:10,400
Ready?

197
00:12:18,560 --> 00:12:20,000
To give a good speech.

198
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:21,720
Your turn.

199
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:30,680
Nice writing.

200
00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:35,760
I wish, I wish, upon the sun,
that my wish is number one.

201
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:37,120
And what did you wish for?

202
00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:40,120
That Mary Ross will get hit by a truck.

203
00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:44,120
Well, that's not very nice.
I thought Mary was your best friend.

204
00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:47,360
- I divorced her.
- You can't divorce a friend.

205
00:12:47,520 --> 00:12:51,160
- Why not?
- Because divorce is for married people.

206
00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:54,520
That's okay. As long as a truck hits her.

207
00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:58,360
All right, killer, come on.

208
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:00,440
- Let's go dogpile Mommy.
- Yay.

209
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:04,160
Shoot. Hey, Monster,
have you seen my morning list?

210
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,320
You need a list to keep
track of your lists.

211
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,400
Oh, thank you.

212
00:13:12,560 --> 00:13:14,560
No, honey, that's all sugar
and food coloring.

213
00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:17,120
You've had enough. Go get dressed.

214
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,240
"Conscious". Is it "sc" or "cs"?
Stop right there.

215
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:23,920
Come and give me a kiss, please.
I got a big lecture today.

216
00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:27,000
- I'll be home in the morning. I love you.
- I love you, too, Dad.

217
00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:28,480
All right.

218
00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:31,480
Don't forget to return the movies.

219
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:33,760
Movies?

220
00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:37,080
No, no, no. I can't.

221
00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:40,000
Would you do it if it was on that list?

222
00:13:41,040 --> 00:13:42,880
- Of course I would.
- Give me your pen.

223
00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,560
- No, I don't have time.
- It's on your way.

224
00:13:45,760 --> 00:13:49,240
- I can't be late for the ferry, so...
- What time do you have to leave the house?

225
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,280
- Eighteen after.
- Eighteen after is not a time.

226
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:57,920
- It's a symptom. It's like a twitch.
- Well, you used to find it adorable.

227
00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:01,920
Yeah, well, I used to pound Jägermeister.

228
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:05,120
Anyway, you won't be late.

229
00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:07,280
- Yes, I will.
- No, you won't.

230
00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:12,640
- You didn't.
- I did.

231
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:16,280
- Oh, shit.
- What? I've given you an extra ten minutes.

232
00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:20,280
No, you didn't. You set it the wrong way.
You've given me ten minutes less.

233
00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:22,040
Oh, shit.

234
00:14:22,240 --> 00:14:24,040
- I'm sure you'll be fine.
- Yeah.

235
00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:25,520
Bye.

236
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:27,720
You forgot the movies.

237
00:14:36,160 --> 00:14:38,160
- Hello?
- Hey, it's Buddy. Is Frank there?

238
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,480
- He just left.
- I might be late.

239
00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:43,800
- So might he.
- Frank? I don't think that's possible.

240
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:46,440
Don't drag him into anything
unsavory tonight.

241
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,360
What do you consider unsavory?

242
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:51,040
<i>Anything that might lead to a rash.</i>

243
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:52,840
- What are you wearing?
- Buddy.

244
00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:56,440
- Come on.
- I'm naked, Buddy.

245
00:14:57,800 --> 00:14:59,440
Thank you.

246
00:15:01,920 --> 00:15:03,560
We're okay.

247
00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:05,760
We're okay. No, no, no.

248
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:08,600
Come on. No, no, no, you're kidding me.

249
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:16,280
Please, please, please. No, no.
Check the time. I'm right here, please.

250
00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:19,480
Hey, congratulations.
You'll be the first one on the next boat.

251
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:22,680
God, come on. Look, sir, please,
I'm begging you right now.

252
00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:25,560
There's plenty of room on the ferry.
Just let me drive it on.

253
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:30,160
Please. I beg you, I have a speech.
My wife, the movies...!

254
00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:33,120
Next boat leaves in an hour.
This boat leaves at eight o'clock.

255
00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:36,120
Oh, look at that, it's eight o'clock.

256
00:15:36,920 --> 00:15:39,400
Next boat, pal.
Schedule to keep, you know.

257
00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,520
<i>The relationship between time and you...</i>

258
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:51,480
<i>is always one of master and slave.</i>

259
00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:56,320
List-making.

260
00:15:56,480 --> 00:16:00,160
It is your anchor,
your harbor in the storm of life.

261
00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:02,480
Start each morning
with your wish for the day.

262
00:16:02,640 --> 00:16:04,960
And then move right on
into your daily goal list.

263
00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:08,440
And remember to keep them
in behavioral terms, and to be specific.

264
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:11,360
Why? Because a specific list...

265
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:14,520
is a happy list.

266
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:19,160
And don't forget, it's chaos out there.

267
00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:22,840
And we conquer that by taking control,
setting priorities.

268
00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:24,600
Life cannot be based on whim.

269
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,360
Those who fail to control whim...

270
00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:30,800
are destined to be controlled by it.

271
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:32,600
Thank you.

272
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,800
Hey, back in the city.

273
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,400
- Good to see you, man.
- Yeah.

274
00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:49,200
Excellent talk, by the way.
That was truly inspirational.

275
00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:51,080
I saw you come in.

276
00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,920
Yeah. My old man
wasn't through busting my ass...

277
00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:55,840
for being late on the Bethnal job.

278
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,960
Do you have any idea how many
windows are in a building that size?

279
00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:01,280
I don't know. Fifty?

280
00:17:02,440 --> 00:17:04,160
Something wrong in Camp Frank?

281
00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:05,520
No.

282
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:07,840
- What?
- It's a little complicated, that's all.

283
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:11,640
That's all right. No, that's okay. I like
knowing your life isn't totally perfect.

284
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,880
- Okay, look. You know this talk today?
- Yeah.

285
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:16,600
It's a big break for me
in the corporate lecture circuit.

286
00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:20,280
Susan. Susan. She knows
how important this is to me.

287
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:22,520
She knows how nervous I get
before a talk...

288
00:17:22,720 --> 00:17:25,080
yet she doesn't say anything,
not a word, you know.

289
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:27,680
Instead, she gets all over me
about my schedule.

290
00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:30,080
She sets the clocks forward
to give me more time...

291
00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:33,000
only she gives me less time
and I end up missing the ferry.

292
00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:35,800
Now, do you have any idea
how embarrassing it is...

293
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:39,280
to show up late to a lecture
on the efficient use of time?

294
00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:42,080
- She actually set the clock forward?
- Actually set the clock forward.

295
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:46,080
- Man, that's good.
- Yeah, it's very funny.

296
00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,640
Come on, man. She's just trying
to unwind you a bit.

297
00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:52,480
I'm not a clock. I'm not wound.
Stop saying that.

298
00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:55,840
Look, not everything in your life
needs to be ordered, Frank.

299
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:59,000
You know, if you don't take any chances,
you never try anything new.

300
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:01,880
That's not true.
Yeah, I take plenty of chances.

301
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:05,680
Great. Let's ask those chicks if they want
to go play some blackjack with us.

302
00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:07,600
- That's not taking a chance.
- Why not?

303
00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:08,920
- Because.
- Because?

304
00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,960
Because everybody knows...

305
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:15,120
that the house advantage for blackjack
is 5.9 percent.

306
00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:17,800
And that doesn't make sense.

307
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,880
- Five point nine percent?
- Yeah.

308
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:24,120
- I thought we were hanging out.
- Yeah, we just did, and it was fun.

309
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:27,720
But if you're not gonna take a chance,
then there's two of them and one of me.

310
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:29,760
I like those odds.

311
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,560
Hi, ladies.
That's my friend Frank over there.

312
00:19:10,880 --> 00:19:14,680
I was at your lecture today. It's not bad.

313
00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:16,200
Thank you.

314
00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:19,360
My boss forced me to read your book,
The Ten Minute...

315
00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:21,280
- It's five.
- What?

316
00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:24,280
- The Five Minute Efficiency Trainer.
- Oh, right. Five.

317
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:27,840
- It worked. It totally worked.
- Really?

318
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:31,640
I didn't expect that.
Usually my boss is an idiot. So...

319
00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:34,520
- It was amazing. I mean, I make lists.
- That's great.

320
00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:38,960
- They're color-coded. It's...
- Yeah. It gets the life on track.

321
00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:41,440
- Am I gushing?
- I have no idea.

322
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:44,000
I'm Paula. Paula Crowe.

323
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:47,600
- I'm Frank. Frank Allen. Nice to meet you.
- You too.

324
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:54,080
Would you like to try something
a little bit different, Mr. Frank Allen?

325
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:55,760
Well...

326
00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:01,680
You know... yeah. Yes, I would actually.

327
00:20:01,840 --> 00:20:02,960
- Yeah?
- Yep.

328
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:09,120
Two Tangerinis, please.

329
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:16,200
You know, you're very brave to be able
to talk in front of so many people.

330
00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:19,360
No. I...

331
00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:22,440
Every night before I give a talk,
I get this nightmare...

332
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:27,240
that I'm giving a huge lecture
and suddenly I notice that I'm naked.

333
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:33,960
Anyway. When I'm actually
giving the talk for real, I reverse it.

334
00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:37,960
I pretend that everyone in the audience
is naked. That helps me breathe a little.

335
00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:40,000
After today's crowd,
I may reconsider that.

336
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:48,640
Frank?

337
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:52,120
Can I ask you a big favor?

338
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:55,320
I really, really have to go tinkle.

339
00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:59,840
And I have this phobia
about public restrooms.

340
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,720
- Would you...?
- I have the same phobia.

341
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,080
- All my life. All my life.
- Right?

342
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:09,480
Would you mind terribly
if I use the bathroom in your room?

343
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:13,280
You're funny.

344
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,120
- Oops.
- Check, please.

345
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:35,280
- Frank?
- Yo.

346
00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:38,520
You know when you said that you
imagined everyone in the audience naked?

347
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,760
Oh, what's this?

348
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:44,760
Does that mean
that you imagined me naked?

349
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:49,640
Yeah, married.
Going on eight years now. Yeah.

350
00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:51,160
How did I look?

351
00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:54,360
Just one. Jesse, she's, great.

352
00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:59,160
We're talking about another one
though, so...

353
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:02,640
This good?

354
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:05,360
I'm gonna
have some juice or something.

355
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:08,760
I made my daily goal list for today.

356
00:22:08,920 --> 00:22:12,240
- It's very specific.
- Yeah. Well, specific...

357
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:15,160
Because it's chaos out there
and you conquer it...

358
00:22:15,320 --> 00:22:18,360
by setting priorities
and taking control.

359
00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:21,560
Well, these aren't
instant gratification priorities...

360
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:24,160
Yeah. We... There's a system to it.

361
00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:29,360
Oh, I'm gonna get that.
Yep, yep, yep. Let me get that.

362
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:31,800
- Hello?
- Hey.

363
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:33,360
Hey.

364
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:36,160
<i>I'm sorry about this morning.
How did the talk go?</i>

365
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:39,120
Score one for the good guys.
I aced it.

366
00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:42,480
What was that?

367
00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:49,560
Nothing.
I think, I have no idea. So...

368
00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:51,640
- Are you all right?
- I'm fine, baby.

369
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,360
<i>I'm just so exhausted right now...</i>

370
00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:57,440
and I love you, and I'm gonna
see you tomorrow, okay? All right?

371
00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:01,040
- Okay, okay.
- Love you too.

372
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:05,920
You should've seen your face.

373
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:10,560
The way you squirmed,
like a squashed little snake.

374
00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:12,440
- I love married men.
- Oh, my God.

375
00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:15,640
Come here. How about
the five more minutes of efficiency?

376
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:19,320
I don't feel well. I have a wife and a kid.
I gotta go home.

377
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:23,720
Relax. It's too late to go anywhere.
You missed the last ferry.

378
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:30,400
- I'll drive around the peninsula, it's fine.
- Well, that would take forever.

379
00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:32,400
- A waste of time.
- Yeah.

380
00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:35,200
Remember that the relationship
between time and you...

381
00:23:35,360 --> 00:23:39,640
- ...is always one of master and slave.
- Watch it, watch it, watch it.

382
00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:42,240
Look, I'm really, really sorry
about this, okay?

383
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:45,480
Use the room as long as you want.
Nothing personal. Honest.

384
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,480
I love my wife.

385
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:51,480
Jerk.

386
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:00,720
Hello?

387
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:04,000
- Hello?
- Hello?

388
00:24:04,920 --> 00:24:07,160
You're probably looking for Frank.

389
00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:10,880
He just left on a mission
of great secrecy. Sorry.

390
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:39,640
Pick a lane. God.

391
00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:54,560
Oh, God.

392
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:57,400
Are you okay? Are you okay?

393
00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,760
Can you unlock the door? Can you...?

394
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:03,320
Okay, what's wrong? Is it your head?
You hit your head?

395
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:05,760
What's wrong with your stomach?
There's something...

396
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:07,160
You're having a baby!

397
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:10,560
Fifteen minutes. We're gonna be there.

398
00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:13,600
We're gonna be at the hospital
in 15 minutes! Just hang in there.

399
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,640
- I'm Frank Allen. What's your name?
- Nancy.

400
00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:19,760
Nancy. Okay, Nancy. You're doing great.
Just keep breathing, okay?

401
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:23,120
Breathe in, out, in, just think about
how happy this child's gonna make you.

402
00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:25,600
I don't... I don't want it.

403
00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:28,360
Well, my thought is
that you're gonna have it.

404
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:31,200
- So you know, just in, out.
- You know what?

405
00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:33,600
- Breathe in.
- I want you to have it. You take it.

406
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:36,200
That's very generous of you,
but no, thank you.

407
00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:40,080
No, thank you... Okay, just hold it.
Hold it!

408
00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:43,360
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Just, come on, we're almost there.

409
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:46,920
Oh, God! That's it, just keep breathing.
Just...

410
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:50,720
Oh, it's just leaking everywhere.
Okay. Just breathe.

411
00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:57,200
Excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm gonna need some information.

412
00:25:57,360 --> 00:26:00,000
- Information on you and your wife.
- No, she's not my wife.

413
00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:04,600
- Well, fill out what you can.
- Okay. Lightheaded here.

414
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:17,040
- Hello?
- Good day.

415
00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:20,400
- May I speak with Mr. Allen, please?
- No, Mr. Allen isn't home.

416
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:23,000
Do you know where he is?
It's very important.

417
00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:24,600
No, I don't.

418
00:26:24,760 --> 00:26:29,040
It seems that Mrs. Allen
is no longer on the hospital premises.

419
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:30,880
I'm Mrs. Allen.

420
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:35,320
Mrs. Allen. You're in no condition
to have left the hospital.

421
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,040
<i>Post-childbirth
can be a very serious condition.</i>

422
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:39,320
Post what?

423
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:42,760
- Your baby needs you.
- What baby?

424
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:45,240
<i>Do I have the right Allen?</i>

425
00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:48,280
I'm... I'm sorry. Who are you looking for?

426
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:51,760
<i>Frank Allen of 17 River Drive.</i>

427
00:26:55,040 --> 00:26:56,600
<i>Hello?</i>

428
00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:59,680
Mrs. Allen? Hello?

429
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:12,000
- Get out.
- What?

430
00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:14,200
- I said, get out.
- Why? What'd I do?

431
00:27:14,360 --> 00:27:19,120
- No, don't give me that. See, I know.
- I have no idea what you're talking about.

432
00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:20,320
- You're a liar.
- Okay...

433
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:23,480
You're a liar!

434
00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:27,280
God! Okay, okay, listen, listen, listen,
I made a small mistake.

435
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,520
- Oh, God!
- Wait! Susan!

436
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,680
I didn't do anything really wrong!
It was a professional flirtation!

437
00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:36,280
Is this what you've been getting up to
all these dumb business trips of yours?

438
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:39,480
She was a nobody!
Yelling! Yelling! Yelling!

439
00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:41,280
- Okay!
- Oh, God!

440
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:44,320
All right, there was a small
chaste-like kiss, more of a peck.

441
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:48,120
- I've been up the whole night.
- There was some tongue, not my tongue.

442
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:51,040
- You've been boning some woman?
- You called, and it was over.

443
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:54,840
- Nothing happened!
- How can you call a baby nothing?

444
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,720
- What baby?
- The baby at the hospital!

445
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,840
- Oh, that baby.
- Get out of my house!

446
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:04,720
- Fuck off!
- I deny everything, Susan! Susan? I...

447
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:10,080
This is absurd. You're a hospital.
How could you treat somebody...

448
00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:11,480
and not know who she is?

449
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:16,080
We occasionally treat the patient before
obtaining their social security number.

450
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:20,680
- And then you let them escape.
- Mr. Allen, this is a hospital, not a prison.

451
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:23,960
We don't expect mothers
to desert their babies.

452
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:35,360
Okay, okay, okay, I'm sorry.
You're absolutely right.

453
00:28:35,520 --> 00:28:38,120
Can you call my wife?
Explain the misunderstanding...

454
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:39,400
and I'll be on my way.

455
00:28:39,560 --> 00:28:41,920
- And tell her what?
- Well, that the baby's not mine.

456
00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:45,280
- That I only met the mother last night.
- I don't know that, Mr. Allen.

457
00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:48,400
Well, it's true.
I drove them here, and that's it.

458
00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:50,400
Save it for your wife.

459
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:54,680
Here's what Susan dropped off for you.

460
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:57,560
What do you think I should do?

461
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,720
Well, are you asking me as your friend
or your lawyer?

462
00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:03,480
Friend.

463
00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:07,280
- Talk. Just talk to her. Be honest.
- I've tried. I'm trying.

464
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:11,520
She won't talk to me until I prove
it's not my child. This is ridiculous.

465
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:13,680
You don't remember the last name?

466
00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:15,400
- No.
- No make on the car?

467
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:16,600
No, it was dark.

468
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:19,960
As your lawyer, if there's anything
you wanna tell me...

469
00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:23,040
you know I'm sworn
to hold it private and confidential.

470
00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:29,440
I didn't know her, Damon!

471
00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:33,200
Well. Without the mother's consent
you're gonna have to get a court order...

472
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,480
for a DNA sample from the baby
for a test.

473
00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:37,520
- How long?
- Four months minimum.

474
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:39,760
Oh, God.

475
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:43,160
Look, stop worrying.

476
00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:47,000
If what you say is true, there's no way
the mother, the hospital or the queen...

477
00:29:47,160 --> 00:29:49,440
could prove that child's yours
in a court of law.

478
00:29:49,600 --> 00:29:53,080
I'm not worried about a court of law.
I'm worried about the court of Susan.

479
00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:56,440
Susan, I demand that you listen to me.
I refuse to be hung...

480
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:20,000
<i>Honey, I'm begging you.</i>

481
00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:21,160
I...

482
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:38,840
Monster, I love you. I...

483
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:41,200
<i>- I love you too, Frank.
- Ken?</i>

484
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:43,440
<i>What are you doing over there?
Where's Susan?</i>

485
00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:45,080
She doesn't want to talk to you.

486
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:47,360
- Put her on.
- Frank, she went to the hospital.

487
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:49,440
You're on the form as the father.

488
00:30:49,600 --> 00:30:52,280
- That's not true.
- Whatever you say.

489
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:53,480
I believe you.

490
00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:56,600
You just need to give Susan
a little more time for your sake, okay?

491
00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:59,320
All right.

492
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:01,560
<i>Hang in there, Frank.</i>

493
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:03,480
Yeah.

494
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:24,480
You should be aware that results
are rarely couched in yes-no responses.

495
00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:27,160
It just doesn't have the exactitude
of DNA testing.

496
00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:31,400
The best is usually a statistical probability
with a significant margin of error.

497
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:33,000
When can I expect results?

498
00:31:33,160 --> 00:31:35,640
Four or five days.

499
00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,360
Now, for the fun part.

500
00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:56,320
- Bye, sweetie. See you later.
- Bye.

501
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:58,120
What's he doing here?

502
00:31:58,280 --> 00:31:59,560
Picking Jesse up.

503
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,160
You're letting him see Jesse?

504
00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:04,360
He's still her father.

505
00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:07,840
Look at that.

506
00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:10,880
Big kiss, please. Okay.

507
00:32:11,840 --> 00:32:13,400
Daddy, when are you coming home?

508
00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:15,320
Hopefully in a few days, sweetie.

509
00:32:15,520 --> 00:32:17,880
How's Mommy? Did she get
any of the messages I left?

510
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:20,240
She called you a moral slob.

511
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:21,920
Well, you know Mommy.

512
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:26,520
Sometimes she gets upset
for no good reason at all.

513
00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:29,720
- Like cleaning my room?
- Exactly.

514
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:32,120
She gets awfully mad
when I don't clean my room.

515
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:34,080
It's just like cleaning your room.

516
00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:36,040
So we're both slobs.

517
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:38,920
I guess so. Yeah.

518
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:43,400
Does that make me a bigamist too?

519
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:46,200
Mommy.

520
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:57,360
What the hell is that?

521
00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:00,360
I'm calling him Abigail.

522
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,960
Unbelievable. He's dressed you
as a princess, and bought you vermin.

523
00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:06,920
He's the best daddy ever!

524
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:18,720
Please.

525
00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:27,280
As far as your question of paternity goes,
Mr. Allen...

526
00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:30,240
the tests prove 100 percent,
without a fraction of doubt...

527
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:32,120
that it is not your child.

528
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:36,560
Yes! Proof! Proof.

529
00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:40,440
Yes, well, I checked the results twice.
There's no question about it.

530
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:43,000
You saved my life here.
I'm just really excited.

531
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:46,760
I was expecting some kind of completely
ambiguous statistic here...

532
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:49,640
so this is.

533
00:33:49,800 --> 00:33:55,040
No, it's actually quite simple.
You have an extra X-chromosome.

534
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:58,360
- No joke?
- Yeah.

535
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:00,400
What is that?

536
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,680
Well, it's a condition called
Klinefelter's Syndrome.

537
00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:07,800
Don't worry, it's harmless. Most men
don't even know they have it...

538
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:11,160
except for one of its manifestations.

539
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:14,560
In what? What manifestation?

540
00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:17,240
Sterility.

541
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:22,320
- Excuse me?
- You've been sterile since birth.

542
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:26,880
I don't understand.

543
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:29,920
It is impossible for you to have children.

544
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:49,560
You got the wrong guy, doc, because
I have a little girl at home, and that...

545
00:34:50,560 --> 00:34:51,880
I'm sorry.

546
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:56,680
Okay, something's wrong here.
I'm gonna sit down and just...

547
00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:59,120
You have the wrong label,
or wrong test.

548
00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:02,200
I mean, this is a hospital.
These things happen here all the time.

549
00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:06,320
I... I'm sorry to drop this on you.
I know this isn't easy to accept.

550
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:08,080
Hey.

551
00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:13,880
Come on, I'm a father. I have a little girl.
A 7-year-old girl. Jesse.

552
00:35:14,040 --> 00:35:18,080
Unlike humans, chromosomes can't betray,
deceive, or willfully lie.

553
00:35:18,240 --> 00:35:20,560
The truth is all they state.

554
00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:34,560
But, Jesse. I have a... A little girl.

555
00:35:34,720 --> 00:35:38,240
I will, of course, take another sample,
but I've run the test twice.

556
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:41,320
I'm afraid, Mr. Allen,
there's been no mistake.

557
00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:11,160
It's all been a lie, hasn't it?

558
00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:12,960
- You tell me.
- I know.

559
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:14,960
Oh, yeah? Well, I know, too!

560
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:16,240
Hi, Daddy.

561
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:22,520
Go to your room, sweetie.
Daddy and I need to talk, okay?

562
00:37:50,560 --> 00:37:51,640
Excuse me?

563
00:37:51,840 --> 00:37:54,760
I'm willing to bet ten bucks
that you're naked under those clothes.

564
00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:56,720
Why don't you join me for a drink?

565
00:38:02,880 --> 00:38:05,040
Hey, buddy?
I think you're sitting in my seat.

566
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,280
I wanna sit next to the pretty girl here?

567
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:12,320
Hey, pinhead, I'm talking to you.
You're in my seat.

568
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:18,120
You work the ferry?

569
00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:21,440
Yeah, so? Move your ass.

570
00:38:22,240 --> 00:38:24,920
If you'd let me on,
I wouldn't have been late.

571
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:27,160
I wouldn't have been so mad at Susan.

572
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:29,480
I wouldn't have been so stupid.

573
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,440
I wouldn't know the things
that I know today.

574
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:35,720
Do I know you or something?

575
00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:39,000
What time is it now?

576
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:41,240
What?

577
00:38:44,400 --> 00:38:46,400
What time is it now?

578
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:48,120
- Screw you.
- What time is it?

579
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:51,680
You want a piece of me, asshole?
Let's take it outside.

580
00:39:40,560 --> 00:39:42,480
That felt good.

581
00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:45,640
Thank you for doing that.

582
00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:10,560
- What is your name?
- Tracy.

583
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:37,520
We're gonna be late again. Get your bag,
sweetie. I'll be in the car, okay?

584
00:40:43,640 --> 00:40:46,240
- Can I help you?
- Does Frank live here?

585
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:48,760
He's not home.

586
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:50,960
I'm his wife.

587
00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:54,080
Hi. I'm Nancy.

588
00:40:54,240 --> 00:40:55,800
I wanted to thank him.

589
00:40:58,200 --> 00:40:59,320
For what?

590
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:01,880
All his help.

591
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:05,800
Is that Frank's baby?

592
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:08,280
Oh, no.

593
00:41:10,720 --> 00:41:15,280
Frank, it's me. Why won't you call
me back? We need to talk. Please?

594
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:17,080
Call me.

595
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:26,360
Flat out on the floor. Then he gets so
scared he takes off on his Harley...

596
00:41:32,920 --> 00:41:34,800
What's going on?

597
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:40,920
Let's talk outside.

598
00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:42,520
Yeah.

599
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:52,120
There are some rumors about Frank.
Crazy stuff.

600
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:55,440
Tom has a cousin who said his best friend
was at the River Shore Bar...

601
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:58,320
when your husband got into a fight
and shredded this big bruiser.

602
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:01,560
- Frank?
- Yes. And he bought a bitchen Harley.

603
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:05,200
No, that's not Frank. That's just
not possible. Somebody's confused.

604
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:10,280
No. John's son works at the shop.
Frank bought a Harley. A red one.

605
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:13,160
- A red Harley?
- Yes.

606
00:42:16,960 --> 00:42:18,640
Without me?

607
00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:25,520
Frank?

608
00:42:25,680 --> 00:42:28,400
Oh, I'm sorry.

609
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:30,400
I'll leave a note.

610
00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:16,800
- I need to talk to you.
- Oh, yeah?

611
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:20,360
I found this in his hotel room.
I'm worried.

612
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:21,800
It's very succinct.

613
00:43:21,960 --> 00:43:24,360
I met the mother.
She says it's not Frank's baby.

614
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,600
Well, that's great.
You can take Frank back.

615
00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:28,760
There was still a woman in his hotel room.

616
00:43:28,960 --> 00:43:32,440
Come on, give the boy a break.
I mean, we all have urges.

617
00:43:32,600 --> 00:43:35,320
- You never look at the pool boy?
- We don't own a pool.

618
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:37,440
You don't need a pool for a pool boy.

619
00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:40,280
It's different.
I never thought of Frank as duplicitous.

620
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:42,680
- It's not Frank-ish.
- No, it's not.

621
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:44,440
It's not really his style.

622
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:47,920
Buddy, stop it. I'm not this wanton
creature you got floating around...

623
00:43:48,120 --> 00:43:50,680
- ...in your sleazy little brain.
- Really?

624
00:43:50,840 --> 00:43:53,280
I've had three men my whole life, okay?

625
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:57,920
And this isn't about me, and it's damn sure
not about you. It's about Frank.

626
00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:00,280
Hey, come on.
You know I'll do anything for Frank.

627
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:04,240
Then find him and make sure
he doesn't do anything dumb.

628
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:16,520
Hey. It's open.

629
00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:18,200
Hey.

630
00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:20,760
- Hey.
- Are you trying to kill yourself?

631
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:23,360
Well, obviously,
but I think it's gonna take a little while.

632
00:44:23,520 --> 00:44:26,440
Good,
because I bring happy news.

633
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:28,640
Susan will take you back.

634
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:30,680
A little begging may be required.

635
00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:33,000
What I do is send red roses
every day for a week.

636
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:36,880
By day five of the big red, she'll forgive
you three hookers and a missed birthday.

637
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:38,600
I'm not going back.

638
00:44:38,760 --> 00:44:41,960
- I had a pretty major revelation, Buddy.
- What?

639
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:44,560
All the decisions I've made in my life
have been wrong.

640
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:48,520
- Everybody feels that way, come on.
- No, it's true.

641
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:51,880
I've always been so goddamn careful
about every choice that I've made...

642
00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:54,080
and what the hell has it gotten me?
Nothing.

643
00:44:54,240 --> 00:44:56,680
So, instead I look around here...

644
00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:59,960
and I write lists of everything
that I really wanna do...

645
00:45:00,120 --> 00:45:02,840
and then I just randomly pick
between them. It's beautiful.

646
00:45:03,040 --> 00:45:06,120
Frank, did you hear me?
Susan will take you back.

647
00:45:06,280 --> 00:45:07,760
What are you doing?

648
00:45:07,920 --> 00:45:11,960
- There's no choice to be made.
- Exactly. This is what I'm talking about.

649
00:45:12,120 --> 00:45:14,040
Whim. Chance.

650
00:45:14,240 --> 00:45:17,240
I've decided to never decide
another thing again.

651
00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:20,720
Hockey.

652
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:23,480
And so it is.

653
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:32,440
Frank, maybe I didn't
make myself perfectly clear.

654
00:45:32,640 --> 00:45:34,240
I really think she'll take you back.

655
00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:37,560
Hey, she loves you, you know?
And you obviously can't live without her.

656
00:45:37,720 --> 00:45:40,960
That's not true.
I'm walking on sunshine out here, man.

657
00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:44,640
When you look at me, you look at
a creature of freedom. A man released.

658
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:48,040
Any chance this "creature of freedom"
is really a monster of depression?

659
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:49,240
No.

660
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:52,600
Look, what you need, and I say this
as your best friend, is a vacation.

661
00:45:52,760 --> 00:45:57,320
A bit of sun, a bit of relaxation,
and a huge chunk of Prozac.

662
00:45:57,480 --> 00:45:59,320
- I like that.
- Yeah?

663
00:45:59,480 --> 00:46:01,680
I like that idea. Watch this.

664
00:46:01,840 --> 00:46:03,320
Okay.

665
00:46:03,520 --> 00:46:05,080
"Prozac."

666
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:08,760
"Streak ice."

667
00:46:11,200 --> 00:46:14,320
- And "become Slayers fan."
- What are you doing?

668
00:46:14,480 --> 00:46:16,760
I'm gonna pick one.
I'm gonna abide by the choice.

669
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:18,720
- You know what that makes me?
- A flake?

670
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:20,000
- Free.
- That's bullshit.

671
00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:23,800
You've been a Meteor since you were 6.
You can't change who you are.

672
00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:25,840
- I can.
- You can't.

673
00:46:26,040 --> 00:46:27,440
Okay, then.

674
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:30,800
To do that, you'd have to be
really twisted, man. Slayers?

675
00:46:30,960 --> 00:46:34,600
That's morally abhorrent. A man
who would do that is capable of anything.

676
00:46:34,760 --> 00:46:36,600
Exactly.

677
00:46:40,640 --> 00:46:44,480
Frank, if you're gonna go nuts, you should
at least have a god or a dog talking to you.

678
00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:47,520
Index cards? It's just not that sexy.

679
00:46:48,440 --> 00:46:50,960
You need help, man.
You need to see a doctor.

680
00:46:51,120 --> 00:46:54,120
- I did.
- You saw a shrink?

681
00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:55,680
No.

682
00:46:55,840 --> 00:46:57,840
No, not a shrink.

683
00:46:58,400 --> 00:47:01,720
If there's something wrong,
you can talk to me, you know?

684
00:47:03,120 --> 00:47:05,080
Jesse's not my genetic daughter.

685
00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:07,320
- What?
- Yeah.

686
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:09,080
Yeah. I have Klinefelters Syndrome.

687
00:47:09,240 --> 00:47:10,600
- Kline-what?
- Klinefelters.

688
00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:15,200
I was born with an extra X-chromosome.
I've been sterile since birth.

689
00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:18,240
- Are they sure? I mean...
- Yeah. Yeah.

690
00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:21,160
It's impossible for me to be a father.

691
00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:50,080
I saw her.

692
00:47:50,240 --> 00:47:54,720
It was December 19.

693
00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:58,320
Oh, God. Oh, no.

694
00:48:09,960 --> 00:48:12,320
- Hey, Jesse.
- Hi, Buddy.

695
00:48:12,480 --> 00:48:14,000
Jesse, how old are you?

696
00:48:14,160 --> 00:48:15,320
- Seven.
- You're seven.

697
00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:17,760
Really? Now when's your birthday?

698
00:48:18,240 --> 00:48:21,240
- Today.
- Today? Today's your birthday?

699
00:48:21,440 --> 00:48:23,600
You didn't get me a present, did you?

700
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:27,480
Oh, jeez. Of course I did.

701
00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:30,480
I got you this watch.

702
00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:33,320
And be careful, it's a Rolex.

703
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:36,560
- Is your mother inside?
- Yeah.

704
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:49,760
Susan, I found a man wandering aimlessly
in the hallway looking for you.

705
00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:52,360
- Thanks, Peg. Goodbye, Peg.
- And what a man he is.

706
00:48:53,280 --> 00:48:56,440
- Is today really Jesse's birthday?
- No, it's in August.

707
00:48:56,600 --> 00:48:58,440
What about Frank? Is he all right?

708
00:48:59,280 --> 00:49:01,600
- Yeah, Damon bailed him out.
- Damon what?

709
00:49:01,760 --> 00:49:03,600
- Who was the third lover?
- Who?

710
00:49:03,760 --> 00:49:06,160
You said I was one of three lovers.
Frank would be two.

711
00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:08,520
- So there must have been a third. Who?
- What?

712
00:49:08,720 --> 00:49:10,280
- Who was the third man?
- Let me go.

713
00:49:10,440 --> 00:49:12,200
- No, not until you tell me.
- You're crazy.

714
00:49:12,360 --> 00:49:14,320
- I want a name. Who was it?
- Alan Zelf.

715
00:49:14,480 --> 00:49:18,240
- Alan Zelf. When?
- When I worked at that burger joint.

716
00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:21,440
I was 17, we did it in the basement
on top of a pile of buns, okay?

717
00:49:21,600 --> 00:49:23,600
What's gotten into you?

718
00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:24,960
Fatherhood.

719
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:39,880
Time.

720
00:49:40,280 --> 00:49:41,920
Efficiency.

721
00:49:42,840 --> 00:49:44,960
Organizational skills.

722
00:49:48,080 --> 00:49:50,480
Do any of you really give a shit?

723
00:49:50,880 --> 00:49:53,840
You're here because your boss thinks...

724
00:49:54,000 --> 00:49:57,080
that if you keep your desk clear
and your calendars streamlined...

725
00:49:57,240 --> 00:50:00,760
you'll sell a few more computers,
and who knows, maybe he's right.

726
00:50:01,200 --> 00:50:03,960
But will that make you any happier?

727
00:50:04,120 --> 00:50:07,800
Will it prevent you from waking up
one morning with an incurable disease?

728
00:50:08,000 --> 00:50:12,160
Will it stop your wife, Susan,
from whoring around on you?

729
00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:15,320
Must've been that week
before New Year's.

730
00:50:15,480 --> 00:50:17,240
At Teddy's party.

731
00:50:17,440 --> 00:50:21,120
I knew it was stupid. Even when we were
doing it I knew it was stupid.

732
00:50:21,280 --> 00:50:23,520
Thanks.
That makes me feel so much better.

733
00:50:23,680 --> 00:50:25,600
- You could've used birth control.
- I did.

734
00:50:25,760 --> 00:50:28,160
- I guess it wasn't completely effective.
- Yeah, no kidding.

735
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:31,440
I could die.

736
00:50:31,600 --> 00:50:34,200
Betrayed.
Yeah, sure, we've been betrayed.

737
00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:36,880
By the assumptions of our own society.
You stay in line.

738
00:50:37,040 --> 00:50:39,840
Keep your shoes shined. Hard work
and devotion will be rewarded.

739
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:43,000
Well, let me ask you something,
is anyone here truly happy?

740
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:45,680
If so...

741
00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:48,040
raise your happy hand.

742
00:50:49,640 --> 00:50:52,200
Then the decisions that you've made
in your life are crap.

743
00:50:52,360 --> 00:50:54,400
You're a crappy person.
Leading a crappy life.

744
00:50:54,560 --> 00:50:55,960
- Crappy, crappy, crappy.
- No.

745
00:50:56,120 --> 00:50:58,120
Yeah. Crappy.

746
00:50:58,280 --> 00:51:01,440
Poor Frank, suddenly finding out
he's not a father.

747
00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:04,680
Enough poor Frank. What about
poor Buddy, suddenly finding out he is?

748
00:51:04,840 --> 00:51:06,400
- Poor Jesse.
- Poor Jesse?

749
00:51:06,560 --> 00:51:08,520
- No father.
- What am I? Chopped liver?

750
00:51:08,680 --> 00:51:09,720
You're a mistake!

751
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:12,080
It could have been me you married
eight years ago.

752
00:51:12,240 --> 00:51:14,040
It would've cramped your style.

753
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:16,800
You don't think I crave stability?

754
00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:20,280
You don't think I haven't wanted a family,
or desired intimacy?

755
00:51:21,840 --> 00:51:24,120
You don't think I've always loved you?

756
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:27,040
No.

757
00:51:30,520 --> 00:51:32,080
- Yes. Yes.
- No. No!

758
00:51:56,240 --> 00:51:58,040
Whim...

759
00:51:58,240 --> 00:51:59,760
not thought.

760
00:51:59,920 --> 00:52:01,680
Chance...

761
00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:03,640
not planning.

762
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:06,800
You are where you are today
because you've been comatose.

763
00:52:06,960 --> 00:52:09,720
You've all lacked passion!

764
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:14,960
Act on those passions.

765
00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:17,680
Succumb to your whim.

766
00:52:17,840 --> 00:52:23,000
Forge a new being, goddamn it.
Do something before it's too late!

767
00:52:28,040 --> 00:52:30,000
Say yes to whim!

768
00:52:30,160 --> 00:52:34,560
Say yes to chance! Say yes to chaos!

769
00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:28,880
Paula, right?

770
00:53:30,560 --> 00:53:35,840
Frank Allen. Are you still a
time tamer?

771
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:39,440
Are you still a home-wrecking bitch?

772
00:53:39,600 --> 00:53:41,520
Still gay?

773
00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:49,200
What's with the cards?

774
00:54:26,240 --> 00:54:27,880
What happened?

775
00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:31,160
What, you don't remember, beasty-boy?

776
00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:32,760
No.

777
00:54:32,920 --> 00:54:34,760
It was terrible.

778
00:54:35,560 --> 00:54:37,240
In a good way?

779
00:54:37,440 --> 00:54:41,040
You passed out halfway in, so to speak.

780
00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:43,360
Why is my pillow wet?

781
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:46,680
You cried in your sleep
for two-and-a-half hours.

782
00:54:46,880 --> 00:54:50,320
Whimpering like a little girl.

783
00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:54,520
It was like soft hotel-porn...

784
00:54:54,960 --> 00:54:57,840
unsatisfying and sad.

785
00:54:59,160 --> 00:55:01,760
- See you.
- See you.

786
00:55:14,360 --> 00:55:16,120
Hey, it's me.

787
00:55:16,280 --> 00:55:20,280
I know this is the 33rd message I've left,
but please call me, okay?

788
00:55:20,440 --> 00:55:22,320
I need to talk to you, Frank.

789
00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:24,040
Please.

790
00:55:25,120 --> 00:55:26,080
Bye.

791
00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:34,160
- Hello.
- Hey.

792
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:35,320
Here you go.

793
00:55:35,480 --> 00:55:37,800
- Thanks.
- Have a good day.

794
00:56:28,120 --> 00:56:29,080
Susan?

795
00:56:29,240 --> 00:56:31,560
No, no, wait, wait, wait, wait!

796
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:45,560
- Stop.
- You have to stop following me.

797
00:56:45,720 --> 00:56:48,280
- And stop getting me flowers.
- For chrissake, Susan.

798
00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:50,640
Cut me some slack.
I'm trying to do what's right.

799
00:56:50,800 --> 00:56:53,800
- Okay. I'm trying to do what's not wrong.
- It's already been done.

800
00:56:53,960 --> 00:56:56,360
- But I love you, doesn't that count?
- No.

801
00:56:56,520 --> 00:56:59,160
Don't play the martyr with me.
You're not alone in this.

802
00:56:59,320 --> 00:57:03,120
- I'm just as smashed up as you are.
- Then find your own hole to crawl into.

803
00:57:04,080 --> 00:57:06,920
Well, what about Jesse?
I mean, she's ours.

804
00:57:10,040 --> 00:57:12,120
Jesse has nothing to do with you.

805
00:57:12,280 --> 00:57:13,760
She hates me, doesn't she?

806
00:57:13,920 --> 00:57:16,600
She doesn't know you well enough
to hate you.

807
00:57:16,800 --> 00:57:19,000
So if she knew me, then she'd hate me?

808
00:57:21,480 --> 00:57:23,120
Buddy, what do you want?

809
00:57:28,120 --> 00:57:30,840
My whole life people have been telling me
I'm not responsible.

810
00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:33,400
I'm not, you know?
I haven't wanted to be.

811
00:57:33,560 --> 00:57:35,520
But this is different.

812
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:39,200
I just desperately wanna do what's right.

813
00:57:46,240 --> 00:57:48,000
What is right?

814
00:58:55,720 --> 00:58:57,080
Hi.

815
00:58:58,800 --> 00:59:00,880
Oh, God. I'm so...

816
00:59:01,760 --> 00:59:03,080
I'm...

817
00:59:04,360 --> 00:59:05,560
I'm sorry, Frank.

818
00:59:09,280 --> 00:59:10,840
You know?

819
00:59:11,520 --> 00:59:13,120
Yeah.

820
00:59:15,840 --> 00:59:17,440
Why didn't you tell me?

821
00:59:17,760 --> 00:59:20,040
It's hard to talk
with a knife in your back, Susan.

822
00:59:20,200 --> 00:59:23,120
No, come on, it wasn't like that.

823
00:59:23,880 --> 00:59:28,120
It had to have happened before New Year's,
after that night it was only you.

824
00:59:31,080 --> 00:59:34,560
- No double-life?
- No, sweetie, no. Never.

825
00:59:37,560 --> 00:59:39,120
Do you know whose it is?

826
00:59:40,120 --> 00:59:44,880
- She's not an "it," she's Jesse.
- Do you know, Susan?

827
00:59:48,560 --> 00:59:49,880
Yes.

828
00:59:50,040 --> 00:59:52,280
She's yours, Frank. She's...

829
00:59:52,800 --> 00:59:55,760
Maybe not medically...

830
00:59:55,960 --> 00:59:59,800
but in all other ways she's your daughter.
You're her father.

831
01:00:01,760 --> 01:00:05,080
Whose is she? Whose is she, Susan?

832
01:00:05,240 --> 01:00:08,160
She's yours. She's yours.

833
01:00:08,320 --> 01:00:12,120
She's yours. She's yours because...

834
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:17,120
Because when she had strep throat
you held her through three nights of fever.

835
01:00:17,280 --> 01:00:20,120
Yours because her first word was "Dad."

836
01:00:20,320 --> 01:00:23,160
Because how scared you got
when you thought you lost her...

837
01:00:23,320 --> 01:00:26,360
in the mall for 40 seconds.

838
01:00:26,520 --> 01:00:29,280
Because of how happy you feel
every time you open your eyes...

839
01:00:29,440 --> 01:00:31,720
and she's standing there looking at you.

840
01:00:32,440 --> 01:00:36,440
She loves you, Frank. You love her.
This is...

841
01:00:36,600 --> 01:00:40,000
This is our home. It's our family.
Come on, Frank.

842
01:00:40,160 --> 01:00:41,880
Mommy.

843
01:00:44,040 --> 01:00:45,320
Mommy.

844
01:00:45,480 --> 01:00:47,320
I'm coming.

845
01:00:52,920 --> 01:00:55,280
I'll be two seconds, okay?

846
01:00:55,480 --> 01:00:57,200
Yeah.

847
01:01:26,440 --> 01:01:31,080
- What is it, honey?
- I had a bad dream.

848
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:37,000
Go back to sleep, okay?

849
01:01:38,280 --> 01:01:40,120
Try to go back to sleep.

850
01:02:21,960 --> 01:02:23,560
Frank?

851
01:02:33,760 --> 01:02:35,160
Shit.

852
01:03:39,200 --> 01:03:43,280
- Can I help you?
- I'd like a weapon, a gun, preferably.

853
01:03:43,440 --> 01:03:45,240
I need to shoot something tonight.

854
01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:49,440
There's a three-day waiting period
on all handguns...

855
01:03:49,600 --> 01:03:52,400
but I can sell you a shotgun,
or a rifle, today.

856
01:03:52,560 --> 01:03:53,840
I'll take one.

857
01:03:54,000 --> 01:03:55,200
Great. What type?

858
01:03:56,440 --> 01:03:58,680
What are you using it for?

859
01:04:00,120 --> 01:04:02,440
- Hunting.
- Hunting.

860
01:04:02,600 --> 01:04:03,600
What are you hunting?

861
01:04:03,800 --> 01:04:05,800
- Duck.
- Duck?

862
01:04:05,960 --> 01:04:08,800
Yes. A huge duck.

863
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:11,520
Are you using a blind?

864
01:04:13,000 --> 01:04:14,480
No.

865
01:04:14,680 --> 01:04:16,640
No. I'd like to do this face to face.

866
01:04:18,680 --> 01:04:21,320
This would be a solid choice for you, sir.

867
01:04:35,120 --> 01:04:36,600
- Hello?
- Hey, it's Damon.

868
01:04:36,760 --> 01:04:37,760
Oh, hey. What's up?

869
01:04:37,920 --> 01:04:40,880
Listen, Frank came by and picked up
the key to the boathouse.

870
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:43,960
He was, acting really weird.
I almost didn't give it to him.

871
01:04:44,120 --> 01:04:46,240
He said he found a faster way
than cigarettes...

872
01:04:46,400 --> 01:04:48,440
<i>and that maybe you should
meet him up there?</i>

873
01:04:48,600 --> 01:04:50,800
<i>I'm a little worried.
Maybe I should go with you.</i>

874
01:04:50,960 --> 01:04:53,080
No, I'll take care of it. Thanks, Damon.

875
01:04:56,520 --> 01:04:57,840
<i>It's Buddy.</i>

876
01:04:58,000 --> 01:05:01,120
<i>I think Frank might've gone up
to the lake to try something rash.</i>

877
01:05:01,280 --> 01:05:04,480
<i>I'm just gonna make sure he's all right.
I'll call you when I get there.</i>

878
01:05:25,160 --> 01:05:26,960
That's amazing.

879
01:05:27,880 --> 01:05:30,520
I was just gonna call you,
and lo and behold, here you are.

880
01:05:30,720 --> 01:05:33,080
Well, Damon told me you came up.

881
01:05:33,600 --> 01:05:36,800
I thought maybe you could use a friend,
you know? Someone to talk to.

882
01:05:36,960 --> 01:05:38,920
Anything on your mind?

883
01:05:39,080 --> 01:05:43,120
This thin mountain air can give
people strange ideas, you know?

884
01:05:43,480 --> 01:05:47,320
Ain't that the truth. No, nothing
I can think of off the top of my head.

885
01:05:48,160 --> 01:05:49,200
How about you?

886
01:05:49,880 --> 01:05:52,120
- Me?
- Anything you wanna tell me?

887
01:05:52,280 --> 01:05:54,200
Not really, no.

888
01:05:58,840 --> 01:06:00,080
Let's go for a boat ride.

889
01:06:08,120 --> 01:06:10,640
So you finished with all those index cards?
Has whim waned?

890
01:06:10,800 --> 01:06:13,200
Hell, no.

891
01:06:13,360 --> 01:06:16,120
It was in the cards to come up here
and accomplish something.

892
01:06:16,280 --> 01:06:18,840
- What sort of something?
- Something big.

893
01:06:19,000 --> 01:06:22,120
- How big?
- Biggest thing in my life.

894
01:06:22,320 --> 01:06:23,960
Is the keyword here "life"?

895
01:06:25,040 --> 01:06:29,240
- Could be. Definitely could be.
- You don't wanna do anything drastic.

896
01:06:29,400 --> 01:06:30,920
Don't I?

897
01:06:31,080 --> 01:06:33,560
I mean, something you can't take back,
you know? Final.

898
01:06:33,720 --> 01:06:35,720
Oh, you mean something I'll regret.

899
01:06:36,800 --> 01:06:40,200
You have to think of those who love you.
I mean, think of your friends.

900
01:06:40,720 --> 01:06:43,600
- Why my friends?
- Because your actions affect them.

901
01:06:44,720 --> 01:06:47,040
Oh, I'll give you that. Yeah.

902
01:06:47,200 --> 01:06:50,000
One should always think
of one's friends before considering...

903
01:06:50,360 --> 01:06:51,680
certain things.

904
01:06:51,840 --> 01:06:53,280
That's profound of you, Buddy.

905
01:06:53,440 --> 01:06:56,600
I suppose that "certain things"
would test the limit of our friendship.

906
01:06:56,760 --> 01:06:58,320
- Wouldn't you think?
- Exactly.

907
01:06:58,480 --> 01:07:00,120
Exactly.

908
01:07:01,080 --> 01:07:03,480
- Aren't we getting out a little far?
- Yeah, Buddy.

909
01:07:03,640 --> 01:07:05,720
We're getting out a little far.

910
01:07:08,240 --> 01:07:11,200
Frank? Buddy?

911
01:07:14,000 --> 01:07:15,800
What the hell are we doing here, Frank?

912
01:07:15,960 --> 01:07:18,800
- I think you know.
- I won't let you.

913
01:07:18,960 --> 01:07:22,160
Yeah? Well, why don't you try
and stop me. Go ahead.

914
01:07:22,360 --> 01:07:24,400
- Where the hell did you get that?
- Who cares?

915
01:07:24,560 --> 01:07:26,800
- I'm not shooting blanks this time.
- Put it down.

916
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:29,720
- We can talk about this, can't we?
- Let's just cut the shit.

917
01:07:29,880 --> 01:07:33,560
- Don't start whimpering now.
- Whimpering? Hey, it's your decision.

918
01:07:33,880 --> 01:07:37,400
- Oh, that's generous of you.
- It doesn't mean I agree with it.

919
01:07:37,680 --> 01:07:39,600
Well, I would hope not!

920
01:07:39,800 --> 01:07:42,200
Look, you can't do this to me,
or you, I won't let you.

921
01:07:42,360 --> 01:07:45,240
- You're gonna have to shoot me first.
- There's a hell of an argument.

922
01:07:45,400 --> 01:07:46,360
Give me that.

923
01:07:52,120 --> 01:07:53,400
Come on.

924
01:07:53,560 --> 01:07:55,880
Shooting me first
was just a figure of speech.

925
01:07:56,040 --> 01:07:58,360
Oh, shit.
Oh, that went all the way through.

926
01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:02,000
I don't think it's smart to put holes
in things that sink or breathe.

927
01:08:02,160 --> 01:08:04,920
But you're the one with the gun.
I can appreciate that.

928
01:08:05,080 --> 01:08:07,880
- Are you looking for something?
- A lifejacket.

929
01:08:10,200 --> 01:08:12,440
Son of a bitch!

930
01:08:13,920 --> 01:08:15,280
Frank!

931
01:08:15,720 --> 01:08:19,600
Frank! Frank, what the hell is going on?

932
01:08:19,800 --> 01:08:20,800
Frank!

933
01:08:22,440 --> 01:08:24,480
They're just dancing, Mommy.

934
01:08:24,640 --> 01:08:26,320
Give me that.

935
01:08:29,360 --> 01:08:30,800
We gotta get help, come on.

936
01:08:35,960 --> 01:08:39,000
There! Go ahead, commit suicide now!

937
01:08:39,720 --> 01:08:42,840
Suicide?
You think I'm trying to commit suicide?

938
01:08:43,000 --> 01:08:46,040
- Yeah.
- You impossibly stupid man.

939
01:08:46,200 --> 01:08:50,560
You philandering, dumba... Murder!

940
01:08:51,080 --> 01:08:54,160
I'm trying to commit murder! You idiot!

941
01:08:58,640 --> 01:09:00,560
Yeah, yeah, a boat.

942
01:09:01,200 --> 01:09:02,880
I... I don't know.

943
01:09:03,040 --> 01:09:07,000
Yeah, I heard a rifle shot.
You need to get out here, now, okay?

944
01:09:07,160 --> 01:09:09,600
Yeah. Yeah, okay.

945
01:09:10,280 --> 01:09:14,280
Sweetie, I need you to stay in the cabin,
okay? Just stay here.

946
01:10:01,560 --> 01:10:04,520
Yeah, don't worry, you still have
a chance to freeze to death.

947
01:10:04,680 --> 01:10:07,120
No, I wanna kill you!

948
01:10:10,720 --> 01:10:14,480
Well, if I knew what you
obviously know, I'd wanna kill me too.

949
01:10:16,520 --> 01:10:19,640
That's understanding of you.

950
01:10:22,680 --> 01:10:23,880
I'm sorry.

951
01:10:24,040 --> 01:10:26,240
Fuck you.

952
01:10:38,960 --> 01:10:41,840
Mrs. Allen, you best wait inside.

953
01:10:42,040 --> 01:10:43,320
Have you found them yet?

954
01:10:43,480 --> 01:10:47,320
When I know something, you'll know
something. Please, wait inside.

955
01:10:55,280 --> 01:10:58,040
Do you even know
where the hell we're going?

956
01:10:58,200 --> 01:11:00,120
There's a footbridge up ahead.

957
01:11:00,280 --> 01:11:02,800
The cabin's a mile from that.

958
01:11:36,320 --> 01:11:38,320
They're searching for us.

959
01:11:38,840 --> 01:11:42,040
- How do they know we're here?
- I told Susan.

960
01:11:46,000 --> 01:11:47,760
Do you love her?

961
01:11:50,480 --> 01:11:52,280
Does it matter?

962
01:11:54,080 --> 01:11:55,880
And Jesse?

963
01:11:59,560 --> 01:12:01,280
She's just a kid.

964
01:12:01,440 --> 01:12:03,560
What does that mean, Buddy?

965
01:12:05,520 --> 01:12:07,640
I hardly know her.

966
01:12:13,640 --> 01:12:15,480
What now?

967
01:12:19,760 --> 01:12:22,840
I just, I thought if I did everything...

968
01:12:23,000 --> 01:12:25,680
for the now,
that I could forget the past...

969
01:12:25,840 --> 01:12:28,480
and the past is who I am.

970
01:12:29,680 --> 01:12:32,600
And I just, I don't... I...

971
01:12:33,040 --> 01:12:36,880
How am I supposed to go back to Susan
if I don't know how to forgive her?

972
01:12:40,320 --> 01:12:42,040
Look.

973
01:12:44,920 --> 01:12:48,600
I'm gonna disappear. Just, look,
tell them that you lost me, okay?

974
01:12:49,000 --> 01:12:51,440
No, Frank. No, I won't.

975
01:12:51,640 --> 01:12:53,680
- Yeah. You owe me that!
- No.

976
01:12:53,840 --> 01:12:56,720
Owe you? I don't owe you anything!

977
01:12:57,800 --> 01:13:01,280
And you know what?
You're a freaking idiot!

978
01:13:04,120 --> 01:13:06,680
I wish Susan had picked me.

979
01:13:07,200 --> 01:13:08,880
I wish Susan loved me.

980
01:13:09,240 --> 01:13:12,080
I wish Jesse thought of me as her father.

981
01:13:12,600 --> 01:13:14,960
But all they do is love you.

982
01:13:17,960 --> 01:13:20,040
God, I even love you.

983
01:13:21,400 --> 01:13:25,120
I'm cold, I'm wet, and I'm past feeling sad
for anyone but myself.

984
01:13:25,280 --> 01:13:29,760
So you know, stay out here if you want.
Become one with nature, go hump Bigfoot.

985
01:13:29,920 --> 01:13:32,920
But I'm going back into the cabin
and getting warm.

986
01:13:35,000 --> 01:13:36,440
God.

987
01:14:17,880 --> 01:14:19,960
I think we got one over here.

988
01:14:20,640 --> 01:14:22,560
Somebody get a blanket!

989
01:14:42,440 --> 01:14:43,720
Where's Mr. Allen?

990
01:14:47,160 --> 01:14:48,480
It's complicated.

991
01:16:20,480 --> 01:16:21,920
Daddy!

992
01:16:26,560 --> 01:16:28,160
Daddy!

993
01:16:58,880 --> 01:17:01,600
<i>You ever hear of chaos theory, Ed?</i>

994
01:17:01,760 --> 01:17:03,000
<i>It's a science.</i>

995
01:17:03,840 --> 01:17:06,720
It tries to determine underlying patterns
in chaotic systems:

996
01:17:06,880 --> 01:17:10,560
Weather, ocean currents, blood flow,
that sort of thing.

997
01:17:10,720 --> 01:17:13,680
Well, it turns out
that there are few things...

998
01:17:13,880 --> 01:17:17,120
more chaotic than the beat
of a human heart.

999
01:17:17,280 --> 01:17:22,040
Speeding up, slowing down.
A pretty face, a flight of stairs.

1000
01:17:22,200 --> 01:17:25,360
It's always changing depending
on what's happening to us out there.

1001
01:17:25,520 --> 01:17:27,960
It's an erratic son of a bitch.

1002
01:17:28,600 --> 01:17:33,040
But underneath all of that bump-a-ta-bump
mess, there is, in fact, a pattern.

1003
01:17:33,240 --> 01:17:34,960
A truth.

1004
01:17:35,120 --> 01:17:36,720
And it's love.

1005
01:17:37,240 --> 01:17:40,960
The most important thing about love
is that we choose to give it...

1006
01:17:41,120 --> 01:17:43,560
and we choose to receive it.

1007
01:17:44,080 --> 01:17:47,520
Making it the least random act
in the entire universe.

1008
01:17:47,680 --> 01:17:50,480
It transcends blood,
it transcends betrayal...

1009
01:17:50,640 --> 01:17:53,520
and all the dirt that makes us human.

1010
01:17:54,640 --> 01:17:57,120
And if you can figure that out...

1011
01:17:57,280 --> 01:18:00,000
the Jake Lees of the world
got nothing on you.

1012
01:18:00,160 --> 01:18:01,680
Now, what's all this about?

1013
01:18:03,120 --> 01:18:06,040
Poor Ed, has Frank been torturing you
with tales of love and war?

1014
01:18:06,200 --> 01:18:08,720
- Well, yes, ma'am.
- You're gonna be late.

1015
01:18:08,920 --> 01:18:10,960
I'll see you in there.

1016
01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:16,080
Thanks.

1017
01:18:20,680 --> 01:18:23,120
- Have you been bad?
- No.

1018
01:18:27,720 --> 01:18:29,120
A little bit.

1019
01:18:30,280 --> 01:18:33,240
Come on, let's go.
Monster, we're gonna be late.

1020
01:18:47,320 --> 01:18:50,800
- You're beautiful.
- I'm nervous, Daddy.

1021
01:18:50,960 --> 01:18:52,280
Jake loves you very much.

1022
01:18:52,440 --> 01:18:55,200
- Ed.
- He loves you too, honey.

1023
01:19:24,920 --> 01:19:28,400
Friends,
we have been invited here today...

1024
01:19:28,560 --> 01:19:32,760
to share in a most important moment
in the lives for Edward and Jessica.

1025
01:19:32,920 --> 01:19:35,160
In the time they've been together...