1 00:00:04,380 --> 00:00:05,380 Ironic, isn't it? 2 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:08,620 I've traveled halfway across the galaxy to find my one true love. 3 00:00:08,940 --> 00:00:09,940 Just a loser. 4 00:00:10,120 --> 00:00:10,879 But why? 5 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:11,880 Why must you leave? 6 00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:13,560 We both know it would never work. 7 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:16,300 It's my parents, isn't it? 8 00:00:18,340 --> 00:00:20,840 No. Was I too clingy? No. 9 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,140 It's the cold -blooded thing! 10 00:00:24,420 --> 00:00:26,060 Don't torture yourself, not you. 11 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:29,920 Our planets are warring. Millions on both sides are dying. 12 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:31,640 Remember me. 13 00:00:52,430 --> 00:00:53,430 Thank God. 14 00:00:55,310 --> 00:00:56,490 Simple. Wonderful. 15 00:00:57,710 --> 00:01:01,110 Thanks. I do my best, even though I am working for scale. 16 00:01:02,130 --> 00:01:03,130 Get it? 17 00:01:03,170 --> 00:01:04,170 Scale? 18 00:01:04,709 --> 00:01:05,890 No, okay, that's funny. 19 00:01:06,650 --> 00:01:07,730 Do you have plans for dinner? 20 00:01:08,210 --> 00:01:12,370 Dinner? Well, thanks for asking, but I'm a little tired. I think I'll just go 21 00:01:12,370 --> 00:01:14,510 home and, ugh, molt. 22 00:01:14,790 --> 00:01:18,330 You know, I'm the guest of honor at a Star Trek convention this weekend. 23 00:01:19,130 --> 00:01:22,280 Anaheim. Fancy hotel, big suite, honor bar. 24 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:26,460 Maybe you'd like to beam down there with me. Beam down there with you? 25 00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:27,720 That's really cute. 26 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:28,920 I don't think so. 27 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:31,900 Come on, babe, lower your shields. Let me in. 28 00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:33,500 You're serious. 29 00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:36,240 We could boldly go where no one has gone before. 30 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,020 Jonathan, snap out of it. 31 00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:42,380 You're not a Starfleet commander, you're an actor. If you want to ask me out, 32 00:01:42,420 --> 00:01:43,960 just ask me out in plain, simple English. 33 00:01:44,260 --> 00:01:45,079 Do you want to go out? 34 00:01:45,080 --> 00:01:46,340 Sorry, I don't date actors. 35 00:02:14,700 --> 00:02:16,700 the earthquake was a mistake, but I was wrong. 36 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:18,420 It's a lot of fun to have around. 37 00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:21,540 I can stop that. 38 00:02:22,880 --> 00:02:26,500 I am a freeloader. I don't belong here. When I wake up, I'll move out and never 39 00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:27,560 bother my ex -wife again. 40 00:02:27,860 --> 00:02:29,620 Unless she wants me to move furniture. 41 00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:31,440 Okay, go ahead. 42 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,960 I say we stuff him full of candy and beat him like a piñata. 43 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:39,360 Hello? 44 00:02:40,220 --> 00:02:41,320 Oh, hi, Jonathan. 45 00:02:42,420 --> 00:02:43,640 How did you get my number? 46 00:02:44,590 --> 00:02:45,710 A Romulan spy? 47 00:02:46,650 --> 00:02:48,030 Ha ha, good one. 48 00:02:48,550 --> 00:02:52,310 No, I haven't changed my mind about Anaheim. I promised my daughter I'd take 49 00:02:52,310 --> 00:02:53,930 to, uh, the circus. 50 00:02:56,870 --> 00:02:59,470 Okay, you live long and prosper, too. 51 00:03:00,090 --> 00:03:01,090 Bye. 52 00:03:01,830 --> 00:03:02,830 Ech, poo. 53 00:03:02,930 --> 00:03:04,570 What are you talking about? He's gorgeous. 54 00:03:04,870 --> 00:03:07,590 Well, then you go out with him. He didn't ask me. You wouldn't go out with 55 00:03:07,590 --> 00:03:08,590 even if he did. 56 00:03:08,610 --> 00:03:10,270 That's because I'm still healing. 57 00:03:10,770 --> 00:03:13,930 You've been separated a year. You're hiding. I am not. 58 00:03:14,570 --> 00:03:16,650 I'm just waiting for the right young fuck to come along. 59 00:03:17,910 --> 00:03:19,350 You know what your problem is? 60 00:03:19,970 --> 00:03:21,890 You're both addicted to orgasms. 61 00:03:23,510 --> 00:03:25,030 Did I black out and miss something? 62 00:03:25,650 --> 00:03:29,470 No, I just think you're both pathetic. All you ever talk about is men and sex. 63 00:03:29,550 --> 00:03:31,230 Men and sex. It's so boring. 64 00:03:31,810 --> 00:03:32,850 What's the big prize? 65 00:03:33,310 --> 00:03:37,030 A few seconds of involuntary muscular contractions. 66 00:03:39,030 --> 00:03:40,990 Well, sometimes you also get car fare. 67 00:03:44,430 --> 00:03:46,290 talking about meaningful relationships. 68 00:03:46,710 --> 00:03:51,630 And yes, orgasms can be a part of that. A wonderful part where two people 69 00:03:51,630 --> 00:03:54,790 connect on a very intimate and spiritual level. 70 00:03:54,990 --> 00:03:56,170 Even if you're faking it. 71 00:03:57,250 --> 00:03:58,250 Here he is. 72 00:03:58,630 --> 00:04:00,790 Like I ever gave him that satisfaction. 73 00:04:02,510 --> 00:04:05,850 Well, I've chosen chastity. 74 00:04:06,350 --> 00:04:07,350 Good. 75 00:04:07,710 --> 00:04:09,830 That's a wonderful choice for a woman your age. 76 00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:12,710 Oh, this has nothing to do with my age. I've chosen it forever. 77 00:04:13,290 --> 00:04:14,290 Oh, really? 78 00:04:14,630 --> 00:04:17,769 Well, I don't want to invalidate your feelings, but I've made that choice 79 00:04:17,769 --> 00:04:19,329 50 times in my life. 80 00:04:20,470 --> 00:04:23,110 After this one, I swore on a stack of Bibles. 81 00:04:23,670 --> 00:04:28,210 Yes, well, I'm serious. I don't want to wind up a bitter, middle -aged, divorced 82 00:04:28,210 --> 00:04:30,730 woman who's obsessed with her erogenous zone. 83 00:04:32,970 --> 00:04:33,970 Am I bitter? 84 00:04:35,290 --> 00:04:37,090 I thought she was talking about me. 85 00:04:38,660 --> 00:04:42,740 This is a phase, right? Oh, yeah. All girls go through that chastity stage, 86 00:04:42,940 --> 00:04:43,679 didn't you? 87 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:47,140 Well, I did dress up as a nun once, but it was an anniversary present for my 88 00:04:47,140 --> 00:04:48,140 husband. 89 00:04:48,180 --> 00:04:50,420 That one? No. Hello, anybody home? 90 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,040 That one. 91 00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:53,500 Come in, Your Holiness. 92 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:54,880 Hello, ladies. 93 00:04:55,060 --> 00:04:56,460 Jeff, don't get up. 94 00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:59,660 I bought this for Zoe. She keeps forgetting it at my house. 95 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:01,760 I can't imagine why. 96 00:05:02,540 --> 00:05:06,520 I never guess who I ran into this morning. Phil Asher. Oh, yeah? How is 97 00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:07,520 and his wife broke up. 98 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:08,760 Oh. 99 00:05:09,230 --> 00:05:13,710 Too bad. They were a great couple. Is he dating yet? Don't even think about it. 100 00:05:14,050 --> 00:05:17,910 Come on. Phil is a good guy. He's down -to -earth, kind, hard -working. 101 00:05:18,190 --> 00:05:21,050 So were the Amish, darling, but I don't want to date them either. 102 00:05:22,130 --> 00:05:25,250 You know what your problem is? You would rather sit at home and make Haagen 103 00:05:25,250 --> 00:05:27,670 -Dazs and Stolichnaya floats than get out there and meet somebody. 104 00:05:28,150 --> 00:05:31,930 First of all, I would never defile good vodka with a dairy product. 105 00:05:32,730 --> 00:05:36,730 And secondly, I have no desire to sit here and be called a coward. 106 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:41,680 Simply because I don't want to date a bland little man named Phil. 107 00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:44,620 Think you had a nerve? 108 00:05:44,980 --> 00:05:46,320 She knows I'm right. 109 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:50,220 Hey, what do you think about inviting Phil tonight to forensic and we'll 110 00:05:50,220 --> 00:05:51,720 accidentally bump them into one another? 111 00:05:51,940 --> 00:05:54,360 So, I would be like your date. 112 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:56,180 Only in the sense that you pick up the check. 113 00:05:56,820 --> 00:05:57,779 Sounds fair. 114 00:05:57,780 --> 00:05:58,860 I'm going to take this up to Zoe. 115 00:05:59,180 --> 00:06:00,180 Eight o 'clock, okay? 116 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:01,500 Perfect. Thanks, Ira. 117 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,340 You never dressed up like a nun for me. 118 00:06:20,780 --> 00:06:22,580 I guess this means the new maid quit. 119 00:06:24,380 --> 00:06:26,540 It's a remarkably good likeness. Yes. 120 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:27,959 Oh, well. 121 00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:29,420 Another day, another voodoo curse. 122 00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:32,340 Why don't you dress? We have an 8 o 'clock reservation. 123 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:33,920 We just stay here. 124 00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:35,080 Order out. 125 00:06:35,380 --> 00:06:36,380 Or you could cook. 126 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:38,420 Come on, I want to take you to dinner. My treat. 127 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:40,440 You never treat. 128 00:06:40,620 --> 00:06:41,319 What's up? 129 00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:44,140 I thought I might have hurt your feelings this afternoon. I want to do 130 00:06:44,140 --> 00:06:46,200 nice. Then give me a pedicure. 131 00:06:49,640 --> 00:06:50,660 Marianne, I set you up. 132 00:06:51,580 --> 00:06:52,580 With who? 133 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:54,040 A bland little man named Phil. 134 00:06:54,420 --> 00:06:58,980 Before you say no, just listen to me. He doesn't even know it's a date. There's 135 00:06:58,980 --> 00:07:00,220 no pressure, no expectations. 136 00:07:00,440 --> 00:07:01,440 It's totally casual. 137 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:05,880 Well, if it means that much to you. 138 00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:07,480 Atta girl! 139 00:07:08,400 --> 00:07:10,840 I have nothing to wear! 140 00:07:12,620 --> 00:07:13,620 Calm down! 141 00:07:13,980 --> 00:07:15,500 It's casual, remember? 142 00:07:15,900 --> 00:07:20,040 It'll... I have not been on a date in twi... 25 years. 143 00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:22,720 So don't talk to me about casual. 144 00:07:23,180 --> 00:07:24,600 Okay. Okay. 145 00:07:25,080 --> 00:07:27,860 This is nice. How about this red one? He'll think I'm a slut. 146 00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:30,840 Purple. Snob. 147 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:32,640 Blue. Boring. Black. 148 00:07:32,900 --> 00:07:35,060 Death. White. Virgin. Yellow. Chicken. 149 00:07:37,140 --> 00:07:38,039 Okay, okay. 150 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:41,240 I have something new hanging in the dressing room that might work. I'll get 151 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:45,340 Where is it? I don't see what you're talking... 152 00:07:55,690 --> 00:07:57,450 If I come out, you're going to make me go. 153 00:07:58,730 --> 00:08:00,290 Stop being such a baby. 154 00:08:00,590 --> 00:08:02,230 I'm not ready for another relationship. 155 00:08:02,590 --> 00:08:05,750 It's not a relationship. It's a plate of ravioli. 156 00:08:06,910 --> 00:08:07,910 Oh, yeah? 157 00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:10,190 What if this Phil and I actually like each other? 158 00:08:10,550 --> 00:08:12,610 What if we start dating, going away on weekends? 159 00:08:12,870 --> 00:08:13,910 Then I'll want to live together. 160 00:08:14,590 --> 00:08:15,590 Get married. 161 00:08:15,910 --> 00:08:18,050 Next thing you know, we'll get divorced. 162 00:08:18,850 --> 00:08:20,470 And I'll have to start stalking him. 163 00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:24,490 Marianne, none of that is going to happen tonight. 164 00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:28,200 All you have to remember is to be pleasant and not to drink directly from 165 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:29,200 wine bottle. 166 00:08:32,059 --> 00:08:33,059 Marianne? 167 00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:35,200 Sybil? 168 00:08:37,260 --> 00:08:39,039 I am so scared. 169 00:08:39,559 --> 00:08:41,080 That's normal, sweetheart. 170 00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:43,559 It'll be okay. 171 00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,580 I'll be by you the whole time. I promise. 172 00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:57,680 You're not going to wear that, are you? 173 00:09:05,780 --> 00:09:07,940 What about you, sir? 174 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,380 Cappuccino, latte, espresso? 175 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:10,840 You have instant? 176 00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:12,780 Instant. Thank you if you got it. 177 00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:15,280 I'll try and find a styrofoam cup. 178 00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:17,180 That's okay. I'll drink it here. 179 00:09:19,380 --> 00:09:23,780 So, Marianne, I bet Phil would love to hear how your house is just across the 180 00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:24,960 street from O .J. Simpson's house. 181 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:28,280 My house is just across the street from Mochi Simpson's house. 182 00:09:28,700 --> 00:09:30,880 Tell them about the helicopter at the night of the chase. 183 00:09:31,360 --> 00:09:32,380 They were very loud. 184 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:39,240 Yeah, that's a nice neighborhood that Brentwood, my ex -wife, lives up there 185 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:41,320 with her new husband. You and Stephanie getting along okay? 186 00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,600 Oh, sure. Why not? Life's too short. 187 00:09:44,460 --> 00:09:46,680 What about you, Marianne? You get along with your ex? 188 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:48,740 I hope his colon explodes. 189 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:54,000 Sybil and I got along great after we split up. Even made love one. 190 00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:55,299 We did not. 191 00:09:55,300 --> 00:09:56,239 Did who? 192 00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:59,820 You didn't tell me that. He's lying. I am not. You had three white Russians and 193 00:09:59,820 --> 00:10:00,960 threw yourself at me. 194 00:10:01,380 --> 00:10:03,940 Hey, Phil, that's some beautiful watch you have there. 195 00:10:04,180 --> 00:10:08,020 Oh, what, $24 .95. Can you believe it? Here, look at this darn thing. It's 196 00:10:08,020 --> 00:10:09,020 indestructible. 197 00:10:09,420 --> 00:10:11,680 I can't believe you're denying it. Watch this. 198 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:15,380 Now, that is value and quality. 199 00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:17,720 Even spent most of the night. 200 00:10:18,100 --> 00:10:20,660 Excuse me, ladies' room. Marianne? Oh, yes, me too. 201 00:10:21,780 --> 00:10:24,380 You don't buy a... fine 84 Beau Chalet. 202 00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:25,700 You rented. 203 00:10:26,180 --> 00:10:27,180 Good one. 204 00:10:28,620 --> 00:10:32,320 I am really upset with you. I know, I know. Phil's not your type. I'm sorry I 205 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:35,740 pushed you into this. Yo, how could you do Ira without telling me about it? 206 00:10:35,860 --> 00:10:37,180 Forget that, did you? 207 00:10:37,580 --> 00:10:38,780 No, and I was drunk. 208 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:42,880 Now back to Phil. If you want to leave any time, I understand. 209 00:10:43,420 --> 00:10:45,100 Why would I want to leave? I think he's fascinating. 210 00:10:45,660 --> 00:10:46,820 I said I was sorry. 211 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:50,800 No, I really like him. I think he's sort of cute and cuddly and a... 212 00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:52,530 Sloppy Joe kind of way. 213 00:10:52,770 --> 00:10:54,810 All righty. Do you think he likes me? 214 00:10:55,390 --> 00:10:56,510 Was I talking too much? 215 00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:59,390 Marianne, you hardly said a word. Oh, should I talk more? 216 00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:03,190 Do you realize this is my first date with a man other than my husband since 217 00:11:03,190 --> 00:11:04,670 Jerry Pinkus in the 11th grade? 218 00:11:05,210 --> 00:11:07,630 I'll tell you what. If you ask, I would ask Phil if he likes me. 219 00:11:09,250 --> 00:11:11,110 How about I pass him a note in study hall? 220 00:11:11,790 --> 00:11:12,790 Come on. 221 00:11:12,850 --> 00:11:14,730 But if he doesn't like me, I'll just die. 222 00:11:21,450 --> 00:11:24,870 I'll push away for you, Marianne. Are you okay? Fine, fine. I'm fine. 223 00:11:25,170 --> 00:11:27,630 Miss Sheridan? Yes? There's a call for you. Oh, thank you. 224 00:11:27,910 --> 00:11:28,910 Hello? 225 00:11:29,430 --> 00:11:30,530 Oh, hi, Jonathan. 226 00:11:31,510 --> 00:11:32,810 How did you find me? 227 00:11:33,050 --> 00:11:34,050 My roommate? 228 00:11:34,170 --> 00:11:36,250 No, that's my daughter. My celibate daughter. 229 00:11:37,470 --> 00:11:39,350 Listen, I can't talk now. I'm on a date. 230 00:11:39,930 --> 00:11:40,930 I am, too. 231 00:11:41,330 --> 00:11:43,790 Ira. Look, he wants to talk to you. 232 00:11:44,910 --> 00:11:46,710 Tell this man we slept together. 233 00:11:47,450 --> 00:11:48,450 I'm confused. 234 00:11:48,630 --> 00:11:51,030 Just do it. I'll tell him if you'll tell Phil. 235 00:11:51,230 --> 00:11:54,810 Ira! Okay, who is he? The second in command of the Starship Enterprise. 236 00:11:57,430 --> 00:11:58,430 Listen, Nimoy. 237 00:11:59,450 --> 00:12:00,730 Stay away from my woman. 238 00:12:01,030 --> 00:12:02,030 Close enough. 239 00:12:04,150 --> 00:12:06,470 We're leaving. Why? What's wrong? Nothing. 240 00:12:06,930 --> 00:12:09,150 Philip invited me to go have a beer in the valley. 241 00:12:09,450 --> 00:12:12,630 Isn't that sweet? Do you want us to go with you? No, thank you. 242 00:12:13,050 --> 00:12:15,610 Oh, I wish we could go with you, but I have another ex -husband at home, and he 243 00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:17,990 worries if I'm out too late. Don't worry. I got the check. 244 00:12:18,270 --> 00:12:19,089 Oh, thanks. 245 00:12:19,090 --> 00:12:20,090 Bye, Ira. Bye. 246 00:12:20,390 --> 00:12:21,390 Bye -bye. 247 00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:24,610 Can you believe that? 248 00:12:24,930 --> 00:12:25,930 Amazing. 249 00:12:26,050 --> 00:12:28,350 Well, looks like it's just you and me, Seb. 250 00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:32,610 Again. There is no again, Ira. It never happened. 251 00:12:33,110 --> 00:12:36,090 Well, then how about we go back to my house, get you drunk, and have it not 252 00:12:36,090 --> 00:12:37,090 happen again? 253 00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:41,030 We'll take one of these. 254 00:12:44,790 --> 00:12:45,790 One of the ladies. 255 00:12:46,190 --> 00:12:47,190 Marianne. 256 00:12:47,330 --> 00:12:49,550 Who are we supposed to meet at the tea room? What are you doing here? 257 00:12:49,750 --> 00:12:50,750 Working up an appetite. 258 00:12:51,370 --> 00:12:52,370 That's enough for today. 259 00:12:52,630 --> 00:12:53,630 Bag it and ship it. 260 00:12:55,050 --> 00:12:57,410 So are you going to tell me about what happened with Bill last night? 261 00:12:57,930 --> 00:12:59,230 I drank a light beer. 262 00:13:00,170 --> 00:13:01,850 Did you know it's spelled L -I -T -E? 263 00:13:02,170 --> 00:13:03,170 Isn't that adorable? 264 00:13:04,230 --> 00:13:07,010 Yeah. We took a drive in a Sportcon Victoria. 265 00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:08,230 What a car. 266 00:13:08,430 --> 00:13:12,470 You could put my entire Mercedes in the trunk of that car and still have room 267 00:13:12,470 --> 00:13:13,470 for your tool. 268 00:13:14,020 --> 00:13:15,020 Philip said that. 269 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:17,040 I laughed. Oh, how I laughed. 270 00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:21,940 Well, that's very nice. You've got your first date under your belt, and who 271 00:13:21,940 --> 00:13:23,880 knows, the next guy you meet might be really special. 272 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:25,240 And then I bought him shoes. 273 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:26,920 Pardon? 274 00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:30,760 Our moonlight drive led to a midnight sale at Nordstrom's, and I bought him a 275 00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:32,880 pair of Italian loafers. You bought him shoes? 276 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:37,660 Somebody was wearing last night some kind of lumberjack thing. You bought him 277 00:13:37,660 --> 00:13:38,660 shoes? 278 00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:42,980 You should have seen his face. He was really tickled. That's what he said. 279 00:13:43,730 --> 00:13:45,110 Marianne, I'm really tickled. 280 00:13:46,010 --> 00:13:48,970 Mrs. Thorpe, would you like me to send these to your house as well? Oh, no, no, 281 00:13:48,990 --> 00:13:51,010 no. I want them gift -wrapped and sent to this address. 282 00:13:51,470 --> 00:13:52,470 Whoa, whoa, whoa, stop! 283 00:13:52,950 --> 00:13:54,630 You're sending him another pair of shoes? 284 00:13:54,850 --> 00:13:57,670 What, are the tassels too much? Tell me, I don't want to make a faux pas. 285 00:13:58,790 --> 00:14:01,910 Marianne, it's been a while since you last dated. People don't give footwear 286 00:14:01,910 --> 00:14:02,910 like they used to. 287 00:14:03,830 --> 00:14:06,730 Oh, Tish, these will really brighten his day. 288 00:14:06,970 --> 00:14:07,970 Go, go, go. 289 00:14:08,650 --> 00:14:11,790 You know, Sybil, I have you to thank for this new relationship. 290 00:14:12,410 --> 00:14:15,790 Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm not taking any credit for this. This is all you. 291 00:14:16,570 --> 00:14:17,570 Ooh, 292 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,150 cowboy boots. 293 00:14:19,770 --> 00:14:21,330 Oh, my God, what have I done? 294 00:14:28,890 --> 00:14:35,870 Something I can do for 295 00:14:35,870 --> 00:14:36,870 you, though? 296 00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:38,150 I'm curious. 297 00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:42,620 You're, what, 45, and you live above your ex -wife's garage. What do you do 298 00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:43,620 self -esteem? 299 00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:46,260 Go away, though. 300 00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:49,700 It's not that I don't care for you. I mean, after all, you are the father of 301 00:14:49,700 --> 00:14:53,180 half -sister, which, of course, would make you, well, nothing to me. 302 00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:59,440 It's just that before you graced us with your extended presence, Mom promised me 303 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:00,840 I could have the room above the garage. 304 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:02,820 Oh, I get it. 305 00:15:03,180 --> 00:15:04,180 Boys, huh? 306 00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:06,580 Yeah, that's it, Jeff. Boys. 307 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:11,740 I need to create a private love nest to satiate my burgeoning carnal hunger. 308 00:15:12,980 --> 00:15:14,480 Excuse me? Move out! 309 00:15:18,740 --> 00:15:19,740 I'm coming! 310 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:20,960 Sorry, Mom. 311 00:15:21,180 --> 00:15:22,740 I gave it my best shot. 312 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,040 You talk to Jeff? 313 00:15:24,180 --> 00:15:25,460 I think I was too subtle. 314 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:28,500 Well, thanks for trying, honey. 315 00:15:30,140 --> 00:15:31,300 Oh, hi, Ira. Hi. 316 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:32,760 right down, Dad. Okay, baby. 317 00:15:32,980 --> 00:15:33,839 We need to talk. 318 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:37,340 About Phil? Yeah, I just got off the phone with Marianne. No, no, not Phil. 319 00:15:37,700 --> 00:15:38,459 What's wrong? 320 00:15:38,460 --> 00:15:39,460 Look at my phone bill. 321 00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:43,980 Zoe's been calling a 976 number from my house. What kind of 976 number? I don't 322 00:15:43,980 --> 00:15:45,760 know. Some kind of chastity chat line. 323 00:15:46,300 --> 00:15:49,360 I called it and got to listen to a bunch of teenagers talk about not having sex 324 00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:51,840 for $2 .95 a minute. 325 00:15:52,720 --> 00:15:55,500 I've been meaning to tell you about this. Our daughter has decided to live a 326 00:15:55,500 --> 00:15:56,500 life of celibacy. 327 00:15:57,180 --> 00:15:58,180 Really? Great. 328 00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:02,180 Aren't you even a little concerned that our divorce has turned her off to ever 329 00:16:02,180 --> 00:16:03,260 having an intimate relationship? 330 00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,280 No, celibate daughter, happy dad. 331 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,400 I'm hoping she'll grow out of it. I'm hoping you'll grow out of it. 332 00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:11,800 Zoe! Wait! 333 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:16,140 Your friend Phil hasn't called Mary Ann since they went out. Do you have any 334 00:16:16,140 --> 00:16:19,080 idea what's going on? Well, I have an inkling. He thinks she's nuts. 335 00:16:19,980 --> 00:16:21,440 Just because she sent him a pair of shoes? 336 00:16:21,660 --> 00:16:23,300 She sent him a pair of shoes every day this week. 337 00:16:23,940 --> 00:16:27,200 Nuts? That's the word he used? Well, there was a colorful word in front of 338 00:16:28,220 --> 00:16:29,320 You know, that's not fair. 339 00:16:29,660 --> 00:16:33,920 Marianne is a very loving and giving human being. Shoes, Sybil. Seven pairs 340 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:34,920 shoes. 341 00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:37,280 Okay. 342 00:16:37,340 --> 00:16:38,440 She's slightly nuts. 343 00:16:38,740 --> 00:16:39,940 That wasn't a colorful word. 344 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:46,400 Hey, Dad, what do you say we get really crazy this weekend and go see a movie 345 00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:47,420 with no animals in it? 346 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:53,580 Yeah, fine. Listen, Zoe, I think that maybe... We have to have a talk. 347 00:16:54,010 --> 00:17:00,110 What kind of talk? An honest, frank, no -holds -barred talk about your, uh, 348 00:17:00,650 --> 00:17:01,930 you know. 349 00:17:02,190 --> 00:17:03,490 My what? Hair? 350 00:17:03,950 --> 00:17:05,310 Clothes? Graves? 351 00:17:05,530 --> 00:17:06,530 This. 352 00:17:07,130 --> 00:17:08,349 Nine, seven, six. 353 00:17:08,630 --> 00:17:09,630 Uh -uh. 354 00:17:09,910 --> 00:17:11,210 What do you do? 355 00:17:11,470 --> 00:17:12,650 Trace all my calls? 356 00:17:12,970 --> 00:17:15,609 Just the ones that cost me $374 a month. 357 00:17:16,310 --> 00:17:17,310 Listen, Zoe. 358 00:17:17,609 --> 00:17:21,710 It's perfectly fine with me that you're not doing what you're... 359 00:17:22,810 --> 00:17:23,810 Not doing. 360 00:17:24,170 --> 00:17:27,089 Boy, when you say no holds barred, you ain't kidding. 361 00:17:27,950 --> 00:17:31,070 I just want to make sure you're not not doing this for the wrong reasons. 362 00:17:32,110 --> 00:17:33,110 What? 363 00:17:33,490 --> 00:17:34,490 Zoe, listen. 364 00:17:35,130 --> 00:17:38,590 We never sat down and had a real heart -to -heart discussion about the 365 00:17:38,590 --> 00:17:42,570 toll a divorce had on you. Yes, and I've always been very grateful for that. 366 00:17:42,850 --> 00:17:44,030 Come on, no jokes. 367 00:17:44,650 --> 00:17:46,770 You know your mother and I love you very much. 368 00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:50,250 Just because we couldn't work out our problems doesn't mean you can't have a 369 00:17:50,250 --> 00:17:52,850 wonderful relationship with a wonderful man someday. 370 00:17:53,710 --> 00:17:54,790 Far in the future. 371 00:17:55,790 --> 00:17:56,930 When you feel you're ready. 372 00:17:57,270 --> 00:17:58,270 After I'm dead. 373 00:18:00,750 --> 00:18:06,070 I never told you this, Dad, but the day you moved out was one of the worst days 374 00:18:06,070 --> 00:18:07,070 of my life. 375 00:18:07,570 --> 00:18:11,130 I know, honey. It was hard on all of us. I just felt so helpless, like it was 376 00:18:11,130 --> 00:18:12,069 all my fault. 377 00:18:12,070 --> 00:18:15,230 No, no, no. Don't ever think that. It had nothing to do with you. 378 00:18:15,550 --> 00:18:18,130 saying it. Daddy doesn't stop the bad dreams. 379 00:18:18,430 --> 00:18:19,430 Oh, baby. 380 00:18:19,830 --> 00:18:22,030 You know I would do anything to make you happy. 381 00:18:22,330 --> 00:18:23,550 Anything in the world. 382 00:18:24,330 --> 00:18:25,570 Can I have a car? 383 00:18:28,970 --> 00:18:29,970 No. 384 00:18:30,590 --> 00:18:31,590 Okay, then let's go. 385 00:18:36,590 --> 00:18:37,790 Just like her mother. 386 00:18:40,470 --> 00:18:41,850 It was the shoes. 387 00:18:47,950 --> 00:18:50,530 And he thought it was obsessive and scary. Go figure. 388 00:18:51,790 --> 00:18:53,910 What is the matter with me? What was I thinking? 389 00:18:54,190 --> 00:18:57,390 You were thinking about making someone happy, and there's nothing wrong with 390 00:18:57,390 --> 00:18:59,770 that. I always used to buy things for Richard. 391 00:19:00,250 --> 00:19:04,590 Shirts, shoes, those little nose hair clippers. 392 00:19:05,710 --> 00:19:06,710 I love that. 393 00:19:07,090 --> 00:19:08,530 And you'll get to do it again. 394 00:19:09,050 --> 00:19:11,770 But next time, maybe wait till the second date. 395 00:19:12,730 --> 00:19:15,090 In the meantime, I'm really proud of you, Marianne. 396 00:19:15,850 --> 00:19:16,930 You took a risk. 397 00:19:17,150 --> 00:19:18,150 Made yourself vulnerable. 398 00:19:18,950 --> 00:19:19,950 That's a big step. 399 00:19:21,250 --> 00:19:22,890 I guess I owe Phil an apology. 400 00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:24,470 No, you don't. He's fine. 401 00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:25,910 No, I do. 402 00:19:26,290 --> 00:19:27,470 Come with me to his office. 403 00:19:27,690 --> 00:19:30,250 Just let it go. This isn't about him, Sybil. 404 00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:31,470 It's about me. 405 00:19:31,550 --> 00:19:33,030 No, it's about him. Please. 406 00:19:33,330 --> 00:19:36,970 If I'm going to come out of this with any dignity, I have to explain. 407 00:19:37,290 --> 00:19:38,590 Wait. Wait, Marianne. 408 00:19:38,910 --> 00:19:41,790 If you're going to insist on doing this, I'm going to have to tell you the 409 00:19:41,790 --> 00:19:42,870 truth. What truth? 410 00:19:43,130 --> 00:19:44,670 He's dead. Phil's dead. 411 00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:48,440 Nice try. 412 00:19:52,940 --> 00:19:59,560 So, the basic plans call for 18 413 00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:05,020 residential units ranging from 3 ,000 square feet. I hope I'm not 414 00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:06,240 Oh, Mary Ann. 415 00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:10,900 Hi. Yes, I'm sort of in a meeting. This will only take a minute. 416 00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:12,160 Hi, Phil. How you doing? 417 00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:13,439 Hi, fellas. 418 00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:16,340 I just came over to explain about the shoes. 419 00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:20,860 Uh -huh. Could we do this later? I simply want you to know that I am not a 420 00:20:20,860 --> 00:20:24,720 lunatic. I'm sure you're not. You see, I've just come out of a very long 421 00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:29,460 marriage, and you were my first date, and perhaps I was a tad overzealous. 422 00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:30,699 Say no more. 423 00:20:30,700 --> 00:20:31,539 Thank you. 424 00:20:31,540 --> 00:20:32,780 Good work, Marianne. Let's go. 425 00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:37,940 Thank you, Phil, for being so understanding. 426 00:20:39,220 --> 00:20:40,220 You're wearing the shoes. 427 00:20:41,220 --> 00:20:42,640 Those are the Tuesday shoes. 428 00:20:43,820 --> 00:20:44,860 I sent you those on Tuesday. 429 00:20:45,080 --> 00:20:46,600 Come on, Marianne. He's wearing the shoes. 430 00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:51,800 Say bye -bye. You won't return my phone calls, but you'll wear my shoes? 431 00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:55,160 Well, they are nice shoes. 432 00:20:57,100 --> 00:20:58,100 Give me the shoes. 433 00:20:58,980 --> 00:21:00,540 Maybe Phil could just send them to you. 434 00:21:00,780 --> 00:21:03,000 I want them now! 435 00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:04,520 Marianne. 436 00:21:05,020 --> 00:21:06,840 Phil, you better give her the shoes. 437 00:21:07,220 --> 00:21:08,220 Maybe. 438 00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:11,000 Could I just send you a check? 439 00:21:16,740 --> 00:21:18,840 I feel nice to see you. Hey, great sock. 440 00:21:22,760 --> 00:21:29,220 What a wonderful way to start the day. 441 00:21:33,220 --> 00:21:36,140 Yes, you're a good boy. Yes, you are. 442 00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:37,500 Isn't that yummy? 443 00:21:38,060 --> 00:21:39,740 Yeah. Here you go. 444 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:41,140 Don't forget dessert. 445 00:21:42,449 --> 00:21:45,870 That's a wonderful habit he's learning, Marianne. Relax, I'm teaching him to 446 00:21:45,870 --> 00:21:48,710 appreciate fine Italian leather. He won't touch your shoes. 447 00:21:50,030 --> 00:21:51,770 Marianne, it's all set. Thank you, Jeffrey. 448 00:21:51,970 --> 00:21:52,869 What's all set? 449 00:21:52,870 --> 00:21:55,590 I've fixed her up with one of my buddies. A former stuntman. 450 00:21:55,790 --> 00:21:56,810 Isn't that exciting? 451 00:21:57,150 --> 00:22:00,130 You really think that's wise, so soon after the shoe incident? Oh, don't 452 00:22:00,250 --> 00:22:03,190 He's the perfect transition man for me. Only has one foot. 453 00:22:04,870 --> 00:22:08,230 Oh, my God, you'll never guess who's at the door. Jonathan Frakes, you pervert! 454 00:22:08,610 --> 00:22:09,610 Don't touch it! 455 00:22:09,710 --> 00:22:10,369 Why not? 456 00:22:10,370 --> 00:22:11,550 You know he's been asking me out. 457 00:22:11,870 --> 00:22:13,510 Somebody even told me he's married. 458 00:22:13,710 --> 00:22:17,170 You know what? I'd jump his bones in a minute. What? What happened to your vow 459 00:22:17,170 --> 00:22:18,089 of chastity? 460 00:22:18,090 --> 00:22:21,890 Heather, this is the number two guy on the Enterprise. If the bald guy dies, 461 00:22:21,950 --> 00:22:22,950 he's the boss. 462 00:22:23,610 --> 00:22:24,830 Stay away from that door. 463 00:22:25,130 --> 00:22:26,130 Shh. 464 00:22:33,090 --> 00:22:34,090 Nobody's home. 465 00:22:34,170 --> 00:22:35,510 Let's try Candice Bergen's house.