1 00:00:41,994 --> 00:00:47,990 - Alan, it's really a very reasonable plan. - Tell that to the Chief of Defence Staff. 2 00:00:48,154 --> 00:00:53,148 - Why is he late? Not very soldierly. - It's this plan. The Ministry's in turmoil. 3 00:00:53,314 --> 00:00:56,465 It's a relocation proposal, not a Russian invasion. 4 00:00:56,634 --> 00:01:01,025 Be all right if it was. We know what we could do to repel that. 5 00:01:01,194 --> 00:01:03,992 - Could you repel it? - No. 6 00:01:04,154 --> 00:01:09,945 - But we don't have to do any thinking about it. - Let's look at this from the PM's point of view. 7 00:01:10,114 --> 00:01:13,106 We have 420,000 service personnel. 8 00:01:13,274 --> 00:01:17,870 Only 20,000 are stationed in the north. Almost everything's in the south. 9 00:01:18,034 --> 00:01:22,425 Navy at Portsmouth, Air Force in Bedford and the Army in Aldershot. 10 00:01:22,594 --> 00:01:26,348 Almost nothing north of The Wash where the unemployment is. 11 00:01:26,514 --> 00:01:29,790 - Servicemen come from the north. - But spend in the south. 12 00:01:29,954 --> 00:01:32,752 Inevitable. That's where they are now. 13 00:01:32,914 --> 00:01:37,146 Anyway, there's nothing to spend it on in the north, is there? 14 00:01:37,314 --> 00:01:40,511 - Chief of Defence Staff. - This cannot happen... 15 00:01:40,674 --> 00:01:44,633 Don't attack me, I'm on your side, but it is a strong argument. 16 00:01:44,794 --> 00:01:50,824 Move 200,000 or 300,000 service personnel up north and you create masses of civilian jobs. 17 00:01:50,994 --> 00:01:53,792 Clerks, suppliers, builders, vehicle maintenance. 18 00:01:53,954 --> 00:01:56,991 300,000 extra pay packets spent in the shops. 19 00:01:57,154 --> 00:01:59,827 You can't move thousands of men like that. 20 00:01:59,994 --> 00:02:05,466 - I thought that's what you did with armies. - You bring 'em back! This'd be permanent. 21 00:02:05,634 --> 00:02:09,752 Guy, can any servicemen be stationed permanently in the north? 22 00:02:09,914 --> 00:02:12,633 I suppose other ranks, junior officers, 23 00:02:12,794 --> 00:02:17,390 but you can't ask senior officers to live permanently in the north! 24 00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:21,024 The wives wouldn't stand for it for one thing. Children's schools. 25 00:02:21,194 --> 00:02:24,345 I understand there are schools in the north of England. 26 00:02:24,514 --> 00:02:30,111 What about Harrods? What about Wimbledon? Ascot? Henley? The Army and Navy Club? 27 00:02:30,274 --> 00:02:34,426 I mean civilisation, generally! It's just not on! 28 00:02:34,594 --> 00:02:37,062 This is being discussed in Cabinet. 29 00:02:37,234 --> 00:02:42,433 We need more serious arguments than senior officers' wives being 300 miles from Harrods. 30 00:02:42,594 --> 00:02:46,348 What's more serious?! Chaps like us might have to move up there! 31 00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:49,711 But are there any strategic arguments against the move? 32 00:02:49,874 --> 00:02:54,994 - We can find those against anything. - But would they stand up to expert scrutiny? 33 00:02:55,154 --> 00:03:00,148 They won't get expert scrutiny. We'll make it top secret like we always do with defence. 34 00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:05,513 - Prime Minister only. - Then they certainly won't get expert scrutiny. 35 00:03:05,674 --> 00:03:10,873 But I wonder whether we might not do better to play the man instead of the ball. 36 00:03:11,034 --> 00:03:13,628 - Which man? - The Employment Secretary. 37 00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:17,184 - This was his suggestion. - Ah, yes. 38 00:03:17,354 --> 00:03:21,029 Suggest to the PM the Employment Secretary is plotting against him. 39 00:03:21,194 --> 00:03:23,662 - Is he? - Not as far as I know. 40 00:03:23,834 --> 00:03:28,988 But the question is whether the Prime Minister can be made to believe that he is. 41 00:03:29,154 --> 00:03:31,190 Any chance of getting rid of him? 42 00:03:31,354 --> 00:03:35,632 - The PM? He's only just house-trained. - The Employment Secretary. 43 00:03:35,794 --> 00:03:37,989 Field Marshal, are you suggesting 44 00:03:38,154 --> 00:03:42,989 humble civil servants should presume to remove a member of HM Government from Cabinet? 45 00:03:43,154 --> 00:03:45,952 - Yes. - Out of the question. 46 00:03:46,114 --> 00:03:49,106 Only the Prime Minister can remove ministers, 47 00:03:49,274 --> 00:03:54,302 but if the Prime Minister came to suspect the loyalty of a member of his Cabinet... 48 00:03:54,474 --> 00:03:59,753 Only someone with advanced paranoia would suspect the Employment Secretary of a plot. 49 00:03:59,914 --> 00:04:02,906 Really? Then we're in with a chance. 50 00:04:05,234 --> 00:04:09,671 Other business. Employment Secretary, you wanted views on your paper. 51 00:04:09,834 --> 00:04:13,543 Yes, my plan to reduce unemployment in the northeast 52 00:04:13,714 --> 00:04:17,184 by moving various defence establishments up there. 53 00:04:17,354 --> 00:04:19,549 Defence Secretary, what's your view? 54 00:04:19,714 --> 00:04:21,705 I know, on the face of it, 55 00:04:21,874 --> 00:04:25,913 this plan looks as though it benefits employment in depressed areas, 56 00:04:26,074 --> 00:04:31,671 but this is to be achieved, as I understand it, by relocating most defence establishments. 57 00:04:31,834 --> 00:04:35,952 This affects the Defence Department as well as Employment. 58 00:04:36,114 --> 00:04:41,666 - I need time to do a feasibility study. - Anybody else have an opinion? Quickly. 59 00:04:41,834 --> 00:04:46,225 I don't know much about it, but it does sound a serious upheaval. 60 00:04:46,394 --> 00:04:48,385 - Expensive. - A big move. 61 00:04:48,554 --> 00:04:50,545 I'm in favour of the proposal. 62 00:04:50,714 --> 00:04:53,945 - So am I. - Absolutely! 63 00:04:54,114 --> 00:04:57,868 Looks as though the Defence Secretary is in a minority of one. 64 00:04:58,034 --> 00:05:02,869 I am the responsible minister. The defence of the realm is in question. 65 00:05:03,034 --> 00:05:06,743 We'll have a full discussion at our next meeting on Friday 66 00:05:06,914 --> 00:05:09,382 and then put it to Cabinet for approval. 67 00:05:09,554 --> 00:05:13,342 Thank you. May I request that it be noted in the minutes 68 00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:18,463 that the Cabinet Committee was in favour of my plan save for one member? 69 00:05:18,634 --> 00:05:22,627 The member whose department would be reorganised. It's a problem. 70 00:05:22,794 --> 00:05:28,027 May I remind the Secretary of State for Defence that every problem is also an opportunity? 71 00:05:28,194 --> 00:05:30,549 (CABINET) Hear hear! 72 00:05:30,714 --> 00:05:36,903 The Secretary of State for Defence fears that this may create some insoluble opportunities. 73 00:05:37,074 --> 00:05:39,030 Nonsense. 74 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:51,473 - Er, Prime Minister... - Oh, still here, Humphrey? 75 00:05:51,634 --> 00:05:57,186 Yes. I wonder if I could have a word with you about the Employment Secretary's plan. 76 00:05:58,114 --> 00:06:02,949 - Yes, terrific, isn't it? - The service chiefs aren't entirely happy. 77 00:06:03,114 --> 00:06:04,832 Good. 78 00:06:06,114 --> 00:06:09,709 - Do I have your full attention? - Of course you do. 79 00:06:09,874 --> 00:06:12,468 - I'm just reading these notes. - Mm-hm. 80 00:06:12,634 --> 00:06:16,024 Prime Minister, there's been an earthquake in Haslemere. 81 00:06:19,554 --> 00:06:21,112 Good. 82 00:06:22,954 --> 00:06:25,752 - What? - The service chiefs don't like this plan. 83 00:06:25,914 --> 00:06:29,668 Taking their wives away from Wimbledon and Harrods! 84 00:06:29,834 --> 00:06:35,545 Prime Minister, that is unworthy. Their personal feelings don't come into it. 85 00:06:35,714 --> 00:06:40,026 - Their objections are entirely strategic. - Oh, strategic, of course. 86 00:06:40,194 --> 00:06:45,791 The Admiralty needs a deep-water port so that has to be at Bath, 30 miles inland. 87 00:06:45,954 --> 00:06:50,584 The job of the Marines is to defend Norway, so we station them at Plymouth. 88 00:06:50,754 --> 00:06:56,112 Army vehicle trials take place in Scotland, so the engineering establishment has to be in Surrey. 89 00:06:56,274 --> 00:06:59,505 Well, these are just isolated examples. 90 00:07:01,194 --> 00:07:04,903 I've got another 700 isolated examples. 91 00:07:05,074 --> 00:07:08,783 - Why are you against it, Humphrey? - I assure you I'm not against it. 92 00:07:08,954 --> 00:07:12,993 I'm simply furnishing you with the appropriate questions - like that of cost. 93 00:07:13,154 --> 00:07:15,748 That's the beauty of it - it makes money. 94 00:07:15,914 --> 00:07:21,193 We sell all these expensive properties in the south and move "up north"! 95 00:07:21,354 --> 00:07:24,152 You think the Employment Secretary has done well? 96 00:07:24,314 --> 00:07:28,102 - Indeed I do. He's a good chap. - Oh, I quite agree. 97 00:07:28,274 --> 00:07:31,630 Absolutely brilliant. 98 00:07:31,794 --> 00:07:33,785 Superb intellect. 99 00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:38,550 Strong footwork, excellent elbows. A major figure, without a doubt. 100 00:07:38,714 --> 00:07:42,866 - He's not that good. - But he is a good chap, wouldn't you say? 101 00:07:43,034 --> 00:07:46,583 - I've just said so. - Oh, yes, indeed. Very popular. 102 00:07:46,754 --> 00:07:49,314 - Is he? - Oh, yes! 103 00:07:49,474 --> 00:07:51,863 - Not as popular as that, surely? - Oh, yes. 104 00:07:52,034 --> 00:07:56,346 - In Whitehall and with the parliamentary party. - I suppose, yes. 105 00:07:56,514 --> 00:07:59,392 - And with the grass roots, I'm told. - Are you? 106 00:07:59,554 --> 00:08:03,229 - And he has quite a following in Cabinet, too. - Does he? 107 00:08:03,394 --> 00:08:07,273 People are beginning to talk about him as the next Prime Minister. 108 00:08:07,434 --> 00:08:12,633 - What... What do you mean? - Oh, I mean when you decide to retire. 109 00:08:12,794 --> 00:08:19,393 I'm not going to retire! I've only just got here! Why are people talking about the next PM? 110 00:08:19,554 --> 00:08:22,466 I'm sure it's just general speculation. 111 00:08:23,354 --> 00:08:27,666 - Does he want to be Prime Minister? - Well, even if he does... 112 00:08:27,834 --> 00:08:31,304 ...surely you've got no reason to suspect his loyalty? 113 00:08:31,474 --> 00:08:34,864 He isn't planning to build up a personal following, is he? 114 00:08:35,034 --> 00:08:37,628 Isn't he? 115 00:08:37,794 --> 00:08:41,946 - Is he? - Spends a hell of a lot of time making speeches. 116 00:08:42,114 --> 00:08:46,744 Only as a loyal minister. I'm sure he pays tributes to you in them, doesn't he? 117 00:08:46,914 --> 00:08:50,509 Does he? Bernard, get me his last six speeches. 118 00:08:50,674 --> 00:08:54,064 Er, yes, I'm just getting them, Prime Minister. 119 00:08:54,234 --> 00:08:56,953 He chats up back benchers in the tea room. 120 00:08:57,114 --> 00:09:00,311 You told ministers to take more trouble to communicate. 121 00:09:00,474 --> 00:09:03,910 - And he has them round to dinner parties. - Oh, does he? 122 00:09:04,074 --> 00:09:07,111 - Worrying. - The Employment Secretary's speeches. 123 00:09:07,274 --> 00:09:13,270 I'm sure he talked about the new PM bringing new hope to Britain, the dawn of a new age. 124 00:09:13,434 --> 00:09:19,589 You know, that leaflet you told Party HQ to issue to all MPs and constituencies. 125 00:09:19,754 --> 00:09:24,225 - No, not a word. - Oh, now that IS odd. 126 00:09:24,394 --> 00:09:28,387 It's more than odd, it's suspicious. Bloody suspicious! 127 00:09:28,554 --> 00:09:32,342 Even so, he surely isn't actively plotting against you. 128 00:09:32,514 --> 00:09:35,074 - Isn't he? - Is he? 129 00:09:35,234 --> 00:09:39,625 - How do I know he's not? - I'm sure you can always find out. 130 00:09:40,394 --> 00:09:44,785 - Get me the Chief Whip. - Yes, Prime Minister. Get me the Chief Whip. 131 00:09:44,954 --> 00:09:48,742 - Now! - Now! Oh, hello, Chief Whip. 132 00:09:48,914 --> 00:09:52,509 Are you at No.12? The PM wants to see you urgently. 133 00:09:52,674 --> 00:09:55,268 - Now! - Now! Thank you. 134 00:10:01,074 --> 00:10:03,269 - Sir Humphrey. - Yes? 135 00:10:03,434 --> 00:10:06,267 - I'm troubled by what I've learned. - What? 136 00:10:06,434 --> 00:10:12,111 I feel I've had my eyes shut. I never realised there was a plot against the Prime Minister. 137 00:10:12,914 --> 00:10:16,224 Is there? How interesting. 138 00:10:16,394 --> 00:10:20,182 - But you said there was. - I said nothing, nothing at all. 139 00:10:20,354 --> 00:10:23,346 You mean... Oh. 140 00:10:23,514 --> 00:10:25,982 - Do you know if there is a plot? - No. 141 00:10:26,154 --> 00:10:29,226 - No, there isn't? Or, no, you don't know? - Yes. 142 00:10:30,474 --> 00:10:33,784 What exactly has the Employment Secretary done? 143 00:10:33,954 --> 00:10:38,664 - Nothing yet, and we must keep it that way. - But isn't his plan a good one? 144 00:10:38,834 --> 00:10:40,825 - For whom? - The country. 145 00:10:40,994 --> 00:10:43,462 - That is hardly the point. - Why not? 146 00:10:43,634 --> 00:10:47,832 Bernard, when you move on from here, where do you plan to go? 147 00:10:47,994 --> 00:10:51,145 Well, I... er... I... I don't know. 148 00:10:51,314 --> 00:10:55,865 - Like to be in charge of defence procurement? - Oh, gosh... 149 00:10:56,034 --> 00:11:00,232 - In Sunderland or Berwick or Lossiemouth? - Is that a place? 150 00:11:00,394 --> 00:11:03,989 - Lossiemouth? What'd you think it was? - A dog food. 151 00:11:06,074 --> 00:11:10,784 If the Employment Secretary has his way, you may get a diet of Lossiemouth. 152 00:11:10,954 --> 00:11:12,672 - See? - Yes. 153 00:11:12,834 --> 00:11:15,428 - How can it be good for the country? - It can't. 154 00:11:15,594 --> 00:11:19,189 Why will the Chief Whip confirm a plot that doesn't exist? 155 00:11:19,354 --> 00:11:25,543 He's bound to hedge. The Chief Whip cannot state that there's no plot just in case there is. 156 00:11:25,714 --> 00:11:30,185 - He has to cover himself. Good morning. - Could you wait in the private office? 157 00:11:30,354 --> 00:11:35,474 Bernard... now go in there and inform me of their conversation. 158 00:11:35,634 --> 00:11:38,194 I'm not sure I can. It might be confidential. 159 00:11:38,354 --> 00:11:43,747 Bernard, the matter at issue is the defence of the realm and the stability of the government. 160 00:11:43,914 --> 00:11:46,826 You only need to know things on a need-to-know basis. 161 00:11:46,994 --> 00:11:49,827 I need to know everything! 162 00:11:50,874 --> 00:11:54,913 How else can I judge whether or not I need to know it? 163 00:11:56,234 --> 00:12:00,227 So you need to know things even when you don't need to know them? 164 00:12:00,394 --> 00:12:05,104 You need to know them because you need to know whether or not you need to know. 165 00:12:05,274 --> 00:12:09,984 If you don't need to know, you need to know so you know there was no need to know. 166 00:12:10,154 --> 00:12:13,146 - Yes! - Good. That's very clear. 167 00:12:18,554 --> 00:12:20,749 Chief Whip, Prime Minister. 168 00:12:22,154 --> 00:12:24,145 Morning, Prime Minister. 169 00:12:26,274 --> 00:12:30,472 - How are things going, Chief Whip? - Oh, quite well, really. Why? 170 00:12:31,514 --> 00:12:35,712 - You've noticed nothing? - Well, it's a difficult time. 171 00:12:35,874 --> 00:12:38,866 Bit of unrest on the back benches... 172 00:12:39,034 --> 00:12:43,186 What... did you have in mind precisely? 173 00:12:43,354 --> 00:12:45,390 A plot. A leadership challenge? 174 00:12:46,274 --> 00:12:49,072 Ah. Yes... 175 00:12:50,074 --> 00:12:54,272 Well, actually, I have no real evidence of anything. 176 00:12:54,434 --> 00:12:58,143 - But you have suspicions? - Oh, I always have suspicions. 177 00:12:58,314 --> 00:13:02,944 - How far has it got? - Oh, only a very... um... very... um... 178 00:13:03,114 --> 00:13:07,426 - Early stage? - Early stage. As far as one can tell. 179 00:13:08,234 --> 00:13:10,828 Should you have a word with him? 180 00:13:10,994 --> 00:13:16,671 I don't want to lose him from the Cabinet. I... just want him under control. 181 00:13:16,834 --> 00:13:19,871 Perhaps you should have a word with him yourself. 182 00:13:20,034 --> 00:13:24,505 No, no, no, no. No, not at this stage. Who else is involved? 183 00:13:24,674 --> 00:13:26,665 Apart from... 184 00:13:29,314 --> 00:13:32,465 - Apart from Dudley, obviously. - Dudley? 185 00:13:32,634 --> 00:13:37,424 Yes, of course, apart from Dudley. Well, apart from Dudley... 186 00:13:38,874 --> 00:13:43,629 Well, it's... um... It's a bit early to say. There may be nothing in it. 187 00:13:43,794 --> 00:13:47,264 - I'm not taking any risks. - No, absolutely not! 188 00:13:47,434 --> 00:13:50,551 I'll go and make a few more enquiries. 189 00:13:50,714 --> 00:13:52,830 (TO HIMSELF) Dudley? 190 00:13:52,994 --> 00:13:54,586 Yes. 191 00:13:55,754 --> 00:14:00,544 I presume the PM's in favour of the scheme because it'll reduce unemployment. 192 00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:03,706 It'll look as if he's reducing unemployment. 193 00:14:03,874 --> 00:14:06,593 Or look as if he's TRYING to reduce it. 194 00:14:06,754 --> 00:14:11,623 Whereas he's only trying to look as if he's trying to reduce unemployment. 195 00:14:11,794 --> 00:14:18,393 Because he's worried that it doesn't LOOK as if he's trying to look as if he's trying to reduce it. 196 00:14:18,554 --> 00:14:22,342 - So how are you going to stop it? - Well, Arnold, the Prime Minis... 197 00:14:22,514 --> 00:14:24,709 The PM has come to suspect 198 00:14:24,874 --> 00:14:29,311 the plan may be the start of a leadership bid by the Employment Secretary. 199 00:14:29,474 --> 00:14:34,753 How ridiculous, but the higher the office, the higher the level of paranoia. 200 00:14:34,914 --> 00:14:38,623 Fortunately, yes, but paranoia needs something to feed on. 201 00:14:38,794 --> 00:14:41,786 Nothing like press leaks for paranoia fodder. 202 00:14:41,954 --> 00:14:47,267 What if there should be a headline about the Employment Secretary's brilliant plan 203 00:14:47,434 --> 00:14:49,629 being blocked by the Prime Minister? 204 00:14:49,794 --> 00:14:53,628 - Man overboard! - With any luck. 205 00:14:53,794 --> 00:14:58,072 But the trouble is a Cabinet Secretary cannot be party to a leak. 206 00:14:58,234 --> 00:15:02,705 - No, of course not. - Whereas a FORMER Cabinet Secretary... 207 00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:09,466 Presumably, as chairman of the Campaign for Freedom of Information, 208 00:15:09,634 --> 00:15:14,389 you have a... a duty to make certain facts available. 209 00:15:14,554 --> 00:15:18,467 Are you suggesting I give confidential information to the press? 210 00:15:18,634 --> 00:15:20,784 Certainly not, Arnold. 211 00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:23,946 This is confidential disinformation. 212 00:15:24,114 --> 00:15:26,230 Ah, that's different. 213 00:15:30,314 --> 00:15:35,911 Oh, excuse me. Is that the evening paper for the Prime Minister? May I? Thank you. 214 00:15:38,034 --> 00:15:42,505 Ah, good. Look, I have to have an urgent word with him. 215 00:15:42,674 --> 00:15:48,670 I wonder if you'd be kind enough to bring that in in, say, three minutes. Thank you. 216 00:15:51,354 --> 00:15:55,552 - Thank you, Bernard. - Humphrey, I know what's been going on! 217 00:15:55,714 --> 00:15:57,432 - You do? - Yes! 218 00:15:57,594 --> 00:16:03,783 A scheme has been hatched behind my back, a disloyal, treacherous plot, and I won't tolerate it. 219 00:16:03,954 --> 00:16:06,263 - I've spoken to the Chief Whip. - And? 220 00:16:06,434 --> 00:16:11,224 He says he has his suspicions. He's going to make enquiries. 221 00:16:11,394 --> 00:16:14,704 He can't tell me more till he has something solid. You see? 222 00:16:14,874 --> 00:16:18,264 - What? - The Employment Secretary is plotting! 223 00:16:18,434 --> 00:16:23,144 - Come on, Humphrey! - Well, I must say, I am surprised. 224 00:16:24,594 --> 00:16:27,791 I should've thought all your Cabinet were loyal. 225 00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:31,549 Loyal! You know what loyalty in a Cabinet minister means? 226 00:16:31,714 --> 00:16:36,344 His fear of losing his own job is slightly greater than his hope of pinching mine. 227 00:16:36,514 --> 00:16:38,903 But with collective responsibility... 228 00:16:39,074 --> 00:16:42,862 If we do something popular, they leak that it was their idea. 229 00:16:43,034 --> 00:16:46,071 If it's unpopular, they leak they were against it. 230 00:16:46,234 --> 00:16:49,943 We're governed on the principle of collective irresponsibility. 231 00:16:50,114 --> 00:16:52,674 - Hah hah (!) - Why do they want your job? 232 00:16:52,834 --> 00:16:58,909 Because I'm the only member of the government who can't be sent to Northern Ireland next week. 233 00:16:59,074 --> 00:17:04,273 I can't believe that the Employment Secretary is actively plotting against you. 234 00:17:04,434 --> 00:17:06,629 What more proof do you want? 235 00:17:06,794 --> 00:17:12,710 This proposal to send defence establishments up north is bound to be leaked to the press. 236 00:17:12,874 --> 00:17:16,264 - Bound to be. - If it were leaked as HIS plan, 237 00:17:16,434 --> 00:17:20,746 it'd confirm your suspicions, but I'm sure it'll go out as a government plan. 238 00:17:20,914 --> 00:17:24,623 - Are you? I'm not. - Ah, the evening paper. 239 00:17:28,154 --> 00:17:33,911 Good God! Look! Swine! There's your proof, Humphrey! 240 00:17:35,274 --> 00:17:37,868 Good heavens, I'm astonished. 241 00:17:39,954 --> 00:17:43,424 "Sources in Whitehall report that this imaginative plan, 242 00:17:43,594 --> 00:17:46,745 "an initiative by the Employment Secretary, 243 00:17:46,914 --> 00:17:49,906 "has been blocked by the Prime Minister"?! 244 00:17:50,074 --> 00:17:52,269 How dare he! 245 00:17:52,434 --> 00:17:54,584 How dare he! I'm... I'm... 246 00:17:54,754 --> 00:17:57,222 - Speechless? - Speechless! 247 00:17:58,274 --> 00:18:01,869 I've backed him all along! I've fought for his sodding plan! 248 00:18:02,034 --> 00:18:05,629 I gave him his first Cabinet post, treated him like a son! 249 00:18:05,794 --> 00:18:07,864 This is the thanks I get! 250 00:18:08,034 --> 00:18:12,869 How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless Cabinet colleague. 251 00:18:13,034 --> 00:18:15,946 It's envy. Dudley is consumed with envy. 252 00:18:16,114 --> 00:18:18,503 It's one of the seven Dudley sins. 253 00:18:23,554 --> 00:18:29,390 Prime Minister, shall we start to draft your letter accepting his resignation? 254 00:18:29,554 --> 00:18:33,342 It's not that simple. He'll deny he leaked, so why am I sacking him? 255 00:18:33,514 --> 00:18:39,225 He'll be more dangerous on the back benches. Sacked, he doesn't have to pretend to be loyal. 256 00:18:39,394 --> 00:18:45,230 - So you mean you'll go ahead with his plan? - I can't. Not now. 257 00:18:45,394 --> 00:18:50,593 It'll look as though he's defeated me. I can't risk that. It's a good plan. 258 00:18:50,754 --> 00:18:54,588 So... perha... Er... no, no, I... 259 00:18:54,754 --> 00:18:58,303 Prime Minister, you're not being indecisive, are you? 260 00:18:58,474 --> 00:19:01,466 No, no! 261 00:19:01,634 --> 00:19:06,628 - No, I just can't make up my mind. - Well, perhaps I can help. 262 00:19:06,794 --> 00:19:09,991 - How? - Technically, I shouldn't be showing you this. 263 00:19:10,154 --> 00:19:13,510 - Why not? I'm Prime Minister, aren't I? - Indeed you are! 264 00:19:14,474 --> 00:19:17,193 That's why I shouldn't show it to you. 265 00:19:17,354 --> 00:19:22,826 It's a Ministry of Defence draft internal paper. The Secretary of Defence hasn't seen it yet. 266 00:19:22,994 --> 00:19:28,193 - But it casts grave doubts on the plan. - Does it? 267 00:19:28,354 --> 00:19:32,142 Many of the valuable buildings he quotes can't be sold. 268 00:19:32,314 --> 00:19:37,308 Some are listed, some have planning controls. The cost of the move would be prohibitive. 269 00:19:37,474 --> 00:19:41,183 It'd create unemployment in the Home Counties and East Anglia 270 00:19:41,354 --> 00:19:47,748 and in Part 3 there are pages and pages of objections on the grounds of military strategy. 271 00:19:47,914 --> 00:19:52,510 - And all this is honest and accurate? - It comes from the Ministry of Defence. 272 00:19:55,514 --> 00:19:58,506 Even so, it COULD be honest and accurate. 273 00:19:59,514 --> 00:20:03,712 You know, I think the public has a right to know this. 274 00:20:04,514 --> 00:20:06,709 It is a top-secret document. 275 00:20:09,714 --> 00:20:14,310 On the other hand, the service chiefs are notorious for their indiscretion. 276 00:20:14,474 --> 00:20:18,353 It could find its way into the hands of some irresponsible journalist. 277 00:20:18,514 --> 00:20:23,224 - Quite. Or several irresponsible... - Several, indeed, Prime Minister. 278 00:20:23,394 --> 00:20:26,989 - Of course, I could never be a party to that. - Certainly not. 279 00:20:27,154 --> 00:20:31,750 So, shall we defer further discussion of the Employment Secretary's plan 280 00:20:31,914 --> 00:20:33,905 to an unspecified future date? 281 00:20:34,514 --> 00:20:36,903 Yeah, let's drop it. 282 00:20:37,074 --> 00:20:40,749 Prime Minister. Meanwhile, I'll go and attend to the plumbing. 283 00:20:43,314 --> 00:20:48,434 - When's he going to leak it? - Did I ask for a leak, Bernard? 284 00:20:49,514 --> 00:20:53,712 - Well, not in so many... No, you didn't. - No, I didn't. 285 00:20:53,874 --> 00:20:57,787 I occasionally have confidential press briefings, but I have never leaked. 286 00:20:57,954 --> 00:21:02,152 Another irregular verb - I give confidential press briefings, you leak, 287 00:21:02,314 --> 00:21:07,104 he's been charged under Section 2A of the Official Secrets Act. 288 00:21:12,114 --> 00:21:15,026 - (ALL) Good morning, Prime Minister. - Morning. 289 00:21:18,034 --> 00:21:21,344 - (BOTH) Good morning. - Have you seen the papers? 290 00:21:21,514 --> 00:21:25,712 - Indeed. - Dudley's replied to the press about that leak. 291 00:21:25,874 --> 00:21:28,593 He's demanded a public inquiry. 292 00:21:28,754 --> 00:21:33,589 - Shocking. - Inquiries never find the true source of a leak. 293 00:21:34,514 --> 00:21:39,110 - But we know the true source. You asked us... - Bernard. 294 00:21:40,994 --> 00:21:43,792 You're not suggesting I authorised this leak? 295 00:21:43,954 --> 00:21:48,505 Er, no, I... er... That is, yes. Um, I mean... Oh, I remember now. Sorry. 296 00:21:50,354 --> 00:21:54,347 - What do you remember, Bernard? - Whatever you want. 297 00:21:54,514 --> 00:21:57,312 I want the public to know there are no divisions. 298 00:21:57,474 --> 00:22:00,830 - But there are. - I don't want them multiplied. 299 00:22:00,994 --> 00:22:04,430 If you multiply divisions, you get back to where you started. 300 00:22:05,794 --> 00:22:09,946 If you divide four by two, you get two. If you multiply it, you get four. 301 00:22:10,114 --> 00:22:12,833 Unless you multiply different divisions... 302 00:22:12,994 --> 00:22:16,953 - Four by two... Bernard, send them in. - Yes, Prime Minister. 303 00:22:18,034 --> 00:22:22,630 I want to keep the Employment Secretary in the Cabinet, and the Defence Secretary, 304 00:22:22,794 --> 00:22:25,627 but I can't let this row go on any longer. 305 00:22:25,794 --> 00:22:30,185 I can't allow the Employment Secretary to be seen to defeat me. I can't risk it. 306 00:22:30,354 --> 00:22:34,347 I suggest you ask the Committee to agree to these three points. 307 00:22:34,514 --> 00:22:37,108 First, they accept Cabinet's decision. 308 00:22:37,274 --> 00:22:40,983 Secondly, there's a cooling-off period with no further discussion. 309 00:22:41,154 --> 00:22:46,865 Further, that all speeches and press statements are cleared with the Cabinet Office. 310 00:22:47,034 --> 00:22:52,154 Splendid. That should do it, yes. Point one, a cooling-off period. 311 00:22:52,314 --> 00:22:55,624 Point two, no more decisions or discussions... 312 00:22:55,794 --> 00:22:58,228 No, what was the second one? 313 00:22:58,394 --> 00:23:01,989 - I can't quite... - I'll write it down for you, Prime Minister. 314 00:23:03,034 --> 00:23:05,753 Ah, gentlemen, please be seated. 315 00:23:06,874 --> 00:23:10,025 You've all had a copy of the agenda. 316 00:23:10,194 --> 00:23:14,153 Item one, minutes of the last meeting. 317 00:23:14,314 --> 00:23:16,703 Excuse me, a point of order. 318 00:23:16,874 --> 00:23:21,152 My plan for defence establishment relocation is not on the agenda. 319 00:23:21,314 --> 00:23:23,509 - That is correct, Dudley. - Why not? 320 00:23:23,674 --> 00:23:29,465 This leaking is creating a damaging press row. I can't allow the Cabinet to seem divided. 321 00:23:29,634 --> 00:23:33,024 - It is divided. - That's why it mustn't look it. 322 00:23:33,194 --> 00:23:38,507 It's a very complex issue and I've decided to defer further discussion until a later date. 323 00:23:38,674 --> 00:23:42,064 - You were in favour of it last time. - No, I wasn't. 324 00:23:42,234 --> 00:23:47,069 - You were! So was everyone, except Defence. - No, they weren't. 325 00:23:47,234 --> 00:23:52,991 - They were! You promised further discussion! - Um... I'm sorry to interrupt, but I think not. 326 00:23:53,154 --> 00:23:56,146 - What? - There was no such promise. 327 00:23:56,314 --> 00:24:01,513 And the PM did not support the proposal. If he had, it would appear in the minutes. 328 00:24:01,674 --> 00:24:04,472 - It doesn't. - Doesn't it? 329 00:24:04,634 --> 00:24:09,503 Prime Minister, why was my request for a further discussion not minuted? 330 00:24:09,674 --> 00:24:12,472 - I... - Er, Prime Minister. 331 00:24:13,714 --> 00:24:19,710 It is characteristic of committee decisions that every member has a vivid recollection of them 332 00:24:19,874 --> 00:24:24,072 and that every member's recollection differs from every other member's. 333 00:24:24,234 --> 00:24:28,830 Consequently, we accept the convention that official decisions are those 334 00:24:28,994 --> 00:24:31,383 recorded in the minutes by the officials. 335 00:24:31,554 --> 00:24:34,751 From which it emerges, with an elegant inevitability, 336 00:24:34,914 --> 00:24:39,305 that any officially reached decision will have been recorded by the officials. 337 00:24:39,474 --> 00:24:42,671 Any decision not recorded has not been officially reached, 338 00:24:42,834 --> 00:24:45,746 even if one or more members believe they can recollect it, 339 00:24:45,914 --> 00:24:49,224 so, in this case, if the decision had been officially reached, 340 00:24:49,394 --> 00:24:51,783 it would've been recorded by the officials, 341 00:24:51,954 --> 00:24:53,945 and it isn't, so it wasn't. 342 00:24:57,514 --> 00:24:59,505 Told you so. 343 00:24:59,674 --> 00:25:02,063 This is a fiddle! Prime Minister... 344 00:25:02,234 --> 00:25:04,384 - No, this must stop. - Yes, it must! 345 00:25:04,554 --> 00:25:08,752 I have drawn up a three-point plan to which we must all adhere. 346 00:25:08,914 --> 00:25:12,304 Point one... What was point one? 347 00:25:13,314 --> 00:25:18,263 Oh, thank you. Point one, everyone will accept collective decisions, Dudley. 348 00:25:18,434 --> 00:25:22,632 - I am perfectly willing to. How are they defined? - I define them. 349 00:25:24,394 --> 00:25:28,865 Point two, there will be a cooling-off period on defence relocations. 350 00:25:29,034 --> 00:25:34,506 - Point three... Can't read this. Cleaning what? - No, CLEARING all speeches... 351 00:25:34,674 --> 00:25:39,065 All speeches and press statements must be cleared with the Cabinet Office. 352 00:25:39,234 --> 00:25:43,830 We can't cool off discussion on something that hasn't been discussed yet 353 00:25:43,994 --> 00:25:48,272 and I cannot accept that anything I say must be cleared by HIM. 354 00:25:48,434 --> 00:25:50,504 He won't clear what I want to say. 355 00:25:50,674 --> 00:25:54,508 - That is my decision and you must accept it. - I won't accept it! 356 00:25:55,634 --> 00:25:56,987 (PRIME MINISTER) Oh. 357 00:25:59,394 --> 00:26:03,103 Well, Dudley, I'm afraid you must consider your position. 358 00:26:08,074 --> 00:26:09,393 - Prime Minister. - Yes? 359 00:26:09,554 --> 00:26:13,786 I have news. Do you want the bad news first? 360 00:26:13,954 --> 00:26:18,266 - There's bad news and good news? - No, bad news and worse news. 361 00:26:18,434 --> 00:26:21,631 The Employment Secretary has resigned. His letter. 362 00:26:21,794 --> 00:26:25,503 - I didn't want to lose him. - Would you like the worse news now? 363 00:26:25,674 --> 00:26:30,429 He's accused you of being dictatorial and running a presidential-style government. 364 00:26:31,314 --> 00:26:33,703 Oh. Well, I don't mind that. 365 00:26:34,794 --> 00:26:38,992 Rather good, isn't it? People like to know they've got a strong leader. 366 00:26:39,154 --> 00:26:42,191 - Dictatorial, eh? - It will be a new pleasure for them. 367 00:26:42,354 --> 00:26:44,743 - No, it won't. - No, it won't. 368 00:26:44,914 --> 00:26:49,305 Humphrey, I'm upset about this resignation. YOUR three-point plan provoked it. 369 00:26:49,474 --> 00:26:52,307 Yes, indeed, Prime Minister, but I understand 370 00:26:52,474 --> 00:26:56,672 the Employment Secretary was planning to resign soon in any case. 371 00:26:56,834 --> 00:26:59,029 Was he? Why? And when? 372 00:26:59,194 --> 00:27:04,951 On budget day, as it was expected to give him insufficient money to deal with unemployment. 373 00:27:05,114 --> 00:27:08,106 - Damaging. - It would've made him extremely popular. 374 00:27:08,274 --> 00:27:13,473 - Perhaps it's as well I made him go. - Prime Minister, you handled it brilliantly! 375 00:27:13,634 --> 00:27:18,230 You forced him to resign on an obscure administrative issue of your choosing, 376 00:27:18,394 --> 00:27:21,386 rather than on a policy issue of his choosing. 377 00:27:21,554 --> 00:27:26,309 Nobody will support him because nobody will understand why he's gone. A masterstroke! 378 00:27:26,474 --> 00:27:29,272 Yes... it was pretty clever, wasn't it? 379 00:27:29,434 --> 00:27:31,470 Oh, masterly! 380 00:27:31,634 --> 00:27:34,626 Here's a press statement you might release. 381 00:27:34,794 --> 00:27:38,992 - Shall I phone Bill? - No, Bernard, I shall phone Bill. 382 00:27:39,154 --> 00:27:41,145 Dictatorial, hm? 383 00:27:42,954 --> 00:27:46,742 I didn't know he was thinking of resigning over the budget. 384 00:27:46,914 --> 00:27:50,509 - Nor did I. - You mean it's not true? 385 00:27:50,674 --> 00:27:55,065 I didn't say it was true. I said I understood it to be true. 386 00:27:55,234 --> 00:27:59,022 - I may have misunderstood. - So you don't know it's true? 387 00:27:59,194 --> 00:28:02,584 - I don't know it's not. It might be. - Anything might be! 388 00:28:02,754 --> 00:28:06,224 Exactly. Well done, Bernard. 389 00:28:06,394 --> 00:28:08,385 Take this down, Bill. 390 00:28:08,554 --> 00:28:14,743 "I'm puzzled because his plan was being studied, but there was a danger of much greater cost 391 00:28:14,914 --> 00:28:19,510 "without necessarily achieving the employment objectives." 392 00:28:19,674 --> 00:28:22,666 Fine. Send it up to me when it's typed. 393 00:28:23,514 --> 00:28:26,824 Well, Humphrey, looks as if you've done me a good turn. 394 00:28:26,994 --> 00:28:30,589 - Yes, indeed, Prime Minister. - Pity, though. 395 00:28:30,754 --> 00:28:34,793 Yes. But he was plotting against you, you said so yourself. 396 00:28:34,954 --> 00:28:37,832 Yes. Hold on, I've got an idea! 397 00:28:37,994 --> 00:28:39,791 Prime Minister! 398 00:28:41,034 --> 00:28:45,346 Now that the Employment Secretary's gone, we could reinstate the plan! 399 00:28:46,394 --> 00:28:48,191 But... 400 00:28:48,354 --> 00:28:52,950 I could press on with it now and it won't look like weakness, but strength! 401 00:28:53,114 --> 00:28:56,106 - But the whole point was... - Was what? 402 00:28:56,274 --> 00:29:00,745 - It wasn't to stop the plan, surely? - No, no, no, no, no. 403 00:29:00,914 --> 00:29:04,384 It was to... um... um... er... er... 404 00:29:04,554 --> 00:29:07,944 ...establish your authority. - Exactly. And I've done that. 405 00:29:08,114 --> 00:29:11,311 So, if we recreate the plan, it'll show I wasn't against it 406 00:29:11,474 --> 00:29:15,467 and that Dudley's resignation was pointless, right? 407 00:29:15,634 --> 00:29:20,025 Put it top of the agenda for the next Cabinet... OK? 408 00:29:21,674 --> 00:29:24,063 Yes, Prime Minister.