1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,319 This programme contains strong language and adult humour 2 00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:05,320 Don't look away. 3 00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:14,000 Don't put that on telly! 4 00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:16,839 Oo-ar! 5 00:00:16,840 --> 00:00:18,080 I might just do this all day. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,159 Argh! This is weird. 7 00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:24,079 So tight. 8 00:00:24,080 --> 00:00:26,560 ALL EXCLAIM 9 00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:37,159 Hello, and welcome to Taskmaster. 10 00:00:37,160 --> 00:00:39,039 Five comedy show ponies 11 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:42,039 put through their paces at the Gymkhana of Laughs, 12 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:43,719 the Grand National of Chuckles, 13 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:45,239 the Dressage of Mirth. 14 00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:48,599 Who will get off to a good start on firm ground today? 15 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:50,079 Who will refuse at the first jump? 16 00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:54,679 And who, God forbid, will have to be humanely destroyed? 17 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:56,439 Let's find out now! 18 00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:59,999 Please welcome Amy Gledhill, 19 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,479 Armando Iannucci, 20 00:01:02,480 --> 00:01:04,719 Joanna Page, 21 00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:06,679 Joel Dommett 22 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:08,800 and Kumail Nanjiani. 23 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:14,359 And next to me, a man who is surprising 24 00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:16,079 in so, so many ways. 25 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:17,839 He loves to paint, for example, 26 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:19,479 he's a keen bird-watcher, 27 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,759 and he has a tattoo on his lower back that simply reads, 28 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:23,960 "Free Britney." 29 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,999 ♪ Little Alex Horne! ♪ 30 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:34,079 I just think it's about time. Get her out. 31 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:37,359 How are you going to irritate me in the first two minutes of this show? 32 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:39,039 I'm not going to irritate you. I've got something 33 00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:41,639 that I'm going to show you that you're going to love... Mm. 34 00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:43,839 ...because I got my very first smartphone. 35 00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:46,359 AMY LAUGHS 36 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:47,719 You want to see it? Yeah. 37 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:49,799 It's a smartphone. Oh. 38 00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:52,719 It's a smart... Look, there's my little face. 39 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:55,159 It's a smartphone. It's all dressed up smart. 40 00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:57,279 Oh, right. Yeah. 41 00:01:57,280 --> 00:01:59,159 I thought you'd like that. I think two things. 42 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:01,119 I'm irritated because that will be the end of the joke. 43 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:02,559 There'll be no... Right? 44 00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:03,759 What, you think there should be more? 45 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:06,079 Is there a follow-up? I knew you were going to say that. 46 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:08,159 Note to self - make sure you think of a follow-up 47 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:09,639 to the really funny smartphone... 48 00:02:09,640 --> 00:02:11,399 Yeah, no, I... 49 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,519 I sort of think there's something in that. 50 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:15,679 I think sort of moronic teenagers would buy that, wouldn't they? 51 00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:17,359 I've got three, so, yeah, maybe. 52 00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:18,679 I'll ask them when I get home. 53 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:21,040 Put the face up again. It's my face. Wa-hey! 54 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:24,960 Nice. Can we copyright that live on air? 55 00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:30,199 That's a thing, isn't it? Copyright. Copyright! 56 00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:32,039 On with the prize task. 57 00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:33,359 What have they brought in this time? 58 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,519 Well, Greg, we've still got loads of good ideas 59 00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:38,199 for prize task categories, but this week they've brought in 60 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:39,999 the most fun thing to drag behind you 61 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,040 on a piece of string when you go for a walk. 62 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:45,159 We all drag string behind us when we go for a walk, 63 00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:48,039 but what's the most fun thing to be on that string? 64 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:50,039 Well, the owner of the thing judged to be most fun 65 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:51,599 will be given five points by you, Greg. 66 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:53,919 And also, this is important... 67 00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:54,960 No, actually, I'm done. 68 00:02:56,640 --> 00:02:58,079 That was it. 69 00:02:58,080 --> 00:02:59,240 Been quite funny today. 70 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:02,919 Hello, Kumail. Greg. 71 00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:05,359 I'm a 47-year-old man, Greg. Yeah. 72 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:10,959 And to me, nothing is more fun than going to bed at a reasonable hour, 73 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:13,999 so what I would love to drag behind me on a piece of string is 74 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:16,039 an early-to-bed kit. 75 00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:17,720 Let's look at it. OK. 76 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:22,399 It's a clock without an alarm set, 77 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,999 melatonin, sleep mask 78 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:30,479 and a diary with one plan that they cancelled on me on! 79 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:33,360 Oh, I'm getting hard just thinking about it. 80 00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:37,879 This is one sweet bit of kit. 81 00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:40,159 You and I should hang out more often, 82 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:42,519 maybe just in one giant bed... Yeah. 83 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:45,559 ...with biscuits. 5pm dinner, and then, to bed. 84 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:48,559 Joel, what's your fun thing to drag around on a bit of string? 85 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:53,799 A parachute attached to your hip, right? 86 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:58,360 Here is a video of me dragging such a thing behind me. 87 00:04:04,240 --> 00:04:06,999 You might have noticed, the eagle-eyed amongst you, 88 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,959 that there was some writing on that parachute. 89 00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:11,280 Prepare yourself, Greg, you're going to absolutely love this. Here we go. 90 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:14,879 It's a play on words... It's a play on... 91 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:16,639 Don't like play on words. Don't like them. 92 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:18,319 I know you don't. Don't like it. 93 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:19,559 I know you don't, but I was really... 94 00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:22,240 It's not clever. It's not clever. Puns aren't clever! 95 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:25,520 Not a fan of The Masked Singer, I assume. 96 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,720 I have not missed an episode. 97 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:32,479 I don't mind play on words. 98 00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:36,519 I love you having a parachute, because you're far too healthy 99 00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:38,519 and fit and bouncy and happy 100 00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:41,039 and I like the idea of you being slowed down occasionally. 101 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:42,239 Mm-hm. It's nice. 102 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,279 Amy, you're next. What have you brought in? 103 00:04:44,280 --> 00:04:49,199 Well, I brought a projector on wheels... 104 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:51,799 Mm. All right. ...projecting a fun video. 105 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:55,399 And it is a fun video. 106 00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:57,760 I shall be the judge of that. 107 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:01,120 This is what Amy brought in. 108 00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:11,759 And that's just constantly playing, 109 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:13,199 You have to charge the battery for 15 minutes, 110 00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:15,040 and it'll play that for an hour. Yeah. 111 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:17,280 It's... 112 00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:23,559 It's sort of a phenomena of some kind, 113 00:05:23,560 --> 00:05:26,120 that it's only the long breast I can concentrate on. 114 00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:29,440 I thought, "What's fun?" 115 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:35,519 So you started with a blank canvas. A blank sheet of paper. 116 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:36,839 "What's...? In life, what's fun?" 117 00:05:36,840 --> 00:05:39,039 I put, "Fun." Circled it... Yeah. 118 00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:41,079 And then put a little circle in the middle of that circle... 119 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:42,679 A little circle in the middle, and then wrote... 120 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:44,280 And then an even smaller one. 121 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:47,879 And then wrote, "Fun bags." 122 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:49,479 Fun bags. Yeah. Fun bags. Fun bags. Oh. Oh. 123 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:50,959 Yeah, they're literally fun. 124 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:52,400 One of those bags isn't fun. 125 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:54,799 Joanna. 126 00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:59,719 I have brought a hip flask in the shape of a fish 127 00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:00,759 full of sherry. 128 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,240 Yes. Ooh. Thank you. 129 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:06,319 At last, a sensible voice. 130 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:11,000 Now, my love of sherry started when I was about seven... 131 00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:14,799 ...because... Strap in! 132 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:17,079 So I lost my appetite after chicken pox. 133 00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:20,159 My nan, who was a matron in a hospital... Mm-hm. 134 00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:22,599 ...told my mum the best way to get my appetite back 135 00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:23,999 was to give me sherry. 136 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:26,759 It's funny how medical standards have changed over the years. 137 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:28,719 So my love of sherry started then. 138 00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:31,679 It then continued when we got our first dog, a spaniel... 139 00:06:31,680 --> 00:06:33,000 Oh, no. Hang on. 140 00:06:35,040 --> 00:06:37,159 You weren't eight when you got the dog, were you? 141 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:39,680 No, I was about eight. We're not going year by year, Joanna. 142 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:44,519 We used to take our dog for a walk down Park Mill, 143 00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:46,639 which was this lovely place in the woods. 144 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:49,199 But there was a pub and then a big car park... OK. 145 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,679 ...and then you'd walk out the back and there'd be the woods. 146 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:54,439 My dad would get the dog out, and then they'd go into the pub, 147 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:57,599 get me a glass of sherry, and I'd have my glass of sherry, 148 00:06:57,600 --> 00:06:59,319 and then we'd go for our walk. 149 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:02,079 And so that is why I think everything in life 150 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:04,239 is better with a glass of sherry. 151 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:05,719 So if I'm going for a walk, 152 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:07,919 I would have a hip flask full of sherry. 153 00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:09,959 Yeah. It's funny, isn't it? 154 00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:12,640 Not only have I had time to write down, "Joanna, one point," I've... 155 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:18,159 ...I've drawn two flowers either side of it. They're lovely. 156 00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:20,799 Armando. Right, fun. 157 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:24,959 I thought a person who you'd be surprised to meet, 158 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:27,399 but then when you saw her, you'd think, "Oh, yeah, that is fun," 159 00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:28,919 which is Lorraine Kelly. 160 00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:33,279 And I thought I could drag her on an improvised trolley... OK. 161 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:34,479 ...which is what I've done. Yes. 162 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:36,320 No! 163 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:45,839 So the winner of the episode 164 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:49,199 gets this cardboard cut-out of Lorraine Kelly on a trolley. 165 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:52,799 I don't know who that is. How dare you! 166 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:55,679 That's like me asking you who Thomas Jefferson is. 167 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:58,600 Lorraine Kelly drew up our constitution 200... 168 00:08:02,840 --> 00:08:06,000 And every morning, defends it on air. 169 00:08:07,240 --> 00:08:08,519 I really liked all of those, 170 00:08:08,520 --> 00:08:11,279 and it feels very mean to give Joanna one point, 171 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:12,440 but there we are. 172 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:15,439 One point to Joanna. 173 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:17,519 If he hadn't stuck the pun on it, he'd had been right up there. 174 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:19,199 Two points to Joel, OK. 175 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:21,399 Honestly, I think you'd be at the top of the pile 176 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:22,959 if it wasn't for the long breast. 177 00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,079 Argh! Just three points. OK. Well done, Amy. 178 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:28,399 You, a man after my own heart, four points. 179 00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:31,439 But how can I beat...? How can anyone beat Lorraine Kelly 180 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:33,959 being dragged on a trolley? Of course, five points. 181 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,720 Five points to Armando. Thank you. 182 00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:39,959 What's up first, please, Alex? 183 00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:43,599 Well, we have an instruction-heavy task 184 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:46,680 that will give everyone a brand-new earworm. Mm? 185 00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:59,159 You must now sing these words with me. 186 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:01,559 Hello. Hello. Are you OK? 187 00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:02,999 Have a seat. 188 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,000 OK. 189 00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:08,999 How are you? I'm good. Are you comfortable? 190 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,000 Yeah. You're loud. 191 00:09:12,840 --> 00:09:13,880 Oh, hello. 192 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:18,960 OK, before you open that... Yeah? 193 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:24,440 Agh! Agh! 194 00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:28,360 Ooh, Jesus! Ooh, Jesus! 195 00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:33,359 Agh! Agh! 196 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:35,399 AMY LAUGHS 197 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,680 Ah! 198 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,799 It'd be better if the wind was going in a different direction. 199 00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:45,679 They're biodegradable, Joel. I'm glad you clarified that. 200 00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:48,360 Oh, my God. I wish I'd put those on first. 201 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:51,079 I bet it's going to say, 202 00:09:51,080 --> 00:09:53,639 "Time started when the confetti cannon goes off." 203 00:09:53,640 --> 00:09:55,160 I've seen this show. 204 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,080 Nice to see you. Nice to see you. It's a lovely day for tasking. 205 00:10:00,760 --> 00:10:02,039 "Put on the headphones, 206 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:04,319 "obey the instructions and build the tower." 207 00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:06,439 "When you think you have built the correct tower, 208 00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:09,239 "you must clap three times." 209 00:10:09,240 --> 00:10:12,119 "Fastest correct tower wins. 210 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:15,119 "Your time started when you first blinked." 211 00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:17,159 Yeah, you did blink when the confetti went off. 212 00:10:17,160 --> 00:10:18,799 Oh, OK. Because you... Yeah. 213 00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:21,360 But... Yeah. I've seen this show. 214 00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:28,159 Five grown adults who react to a confetti cannon going off 215 00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:32,359 in the way that normal people would react to being attacked by a tiger 216 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:34,279 have to build a tower. 217 00:10:34,280 --> 00:10:36,599 Yes, they do. Shall we, then? We shall. 218 00:10:36,600 --> 00:10:37,719 And first up, 219 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,439 it's the Edinburgh Comedy Award-winning stand-up Amy Gledhill 220 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:42,000 and also Joel Dommett. 221 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:50,759 {\an8}At the bottom of the tower, there is a red brick. Red brick. 222 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:53,039 {\an8}At the top of the tower, there is a blue brick. 223 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:56,359 {\an8}On top of the bottom red brick, there is a yellow brick. 224 00:10:56,360 --> 00:11:00,119 {\an8}You must hold up two green bricks within the next two seconds 225 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:02,839 {\an8}otherwise Alex will dismantle your tower. 226 00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:03,999 Lovely. 227 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,319 {\an8}You must now sing, 228 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,959 ♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 229 00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:08,999 Your turn. 230 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:11,319 ♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 231 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:12,720 Now wink at the camera. 232 00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:17,359 Above the lowest yellow brick, there is a yellow brick. 233 00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:20,079 {\an8}Above that yellow brick, there are two more bricks, 234 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:21,399 {\an8}then a yellow brick. 235 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:23,999 {\an8}You must hold up a blue brick in your left hand 236 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:26,839 {\an8}and a red in your right hand in the next two seconds 237 00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:29,039 {\an8}otherwise Alex will dismantle your tower. 238 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:31,359 Very nice. You've got some confetti in your hair. 239 00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:32,559 OK. 240 00:11:32,560 --> 00:11:34,359 You must now sing these words, 241 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,799 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 242 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:39,199 ♪ Blue, red... ♪ ♪ Yellow, red, red. ♪ 243 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:41,439 {\an8}Oh. You can do better than that. Close? 244 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:44,959 From the bottom, it goes red, something, something, red, 245 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:48,079 something, something, green, something, something, blue. 246 00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:50,599 The bottom brick should be red. Yes. 247 00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:52,200 Argh! Now wink at the camera. 248 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,439 Wink at the camera. 249 00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:58,759 Now wink at the camera. Now wink at the camera. 250 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:00,079 Argh! 251 00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,399 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 252 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:03,599 That bit's right. 253 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:05,999 {\an8}The bottom brick is red. Yes, I know that. 254 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:08,639 {\an8}♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 255 00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:09,719 Is that a clue? 256 00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:12,559 Now wave to the camera holding a red brick in your right hand 257 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:14,599 and a blue brick in your left hand, 258 00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:16,999 otherwise Alex will dismantle your tower. 259 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:18,639 What was that? Oh, fuck! 260 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:20,759 I forgot which way round it was. 261 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:23,159 No, please don't do it! 262 00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:24,719 You didn't wave to the camera, Joel. No! 263 00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,679 You didn't wave to the camera. 264 00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:27,759 {\an8}Let's start again. 265 00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:30,559 {\an8} yellow. ♪ 266 00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:31,759 Yes? ♪ Yellow. ♪ 267 00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:33,279 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 268 00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:34,439 Yeah. 269 00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:36,439 Now wave to the camera 270 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:38,559 holding a red brick and a blue brick... No, I've finished! 271 00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:39,759 ...within the next two seconds... Argh! 272 00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:41,639 ...otherwise Alex will dismantle your tower. 273 00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:43,279 I didn't hear what it said! I didn't listen to that one! 274 00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:45,799 No! No, no, no! 275 00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,200 I have to dismantle your tower. 276 00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:51,239 ♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 277 00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:53,400 ♪ Yellow, red, yellow, yellow, blue. ♪ 278 00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:57,200 I've stopped the clock. 279 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,799 You may remove your headphones. Is it right? 280 00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:02,920 Looks right to me. 281 00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:05,879 Fuck! Whew! 282 00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:06,920 You're annoying. 283 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:16,679 Amy, I've got a question for you - 284 00:13:16,680 --> 00:13:19,160 have you ever winked before? 285 00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:25,119 I can't do it without opening my mouth 286 00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:26,920 and sort of doing this horrible thing with my tongue. 287 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:30,279 Can we have a look at Amy's wink? Oh, no. 288 00:13:30,280 --> 00:13:31,400 OK, here's her wink. 289 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,719 Were you annoyed at any point? 290 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:39,159 Yeah, I was... 291 00:13:39,160 --> 00:13:41,679 You were very sad when you grabbed them like a child. Oh, yeah! 292 00:13:41,680 --> 00:13:43,319 When you grabbed the tower. Yeah. 293 00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:45,919 Well, I've never hugged a brick before, and... 294 00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:47,599 You said you've never held a brick before. 295 00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:50,880 That was the first time that it felt like I'd done manual labour. 296 00:13:54,040 --> 00:13:56,719 The times are not that bad. Joel, 11 minutes, 44, 297 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:59,439 and Amy, nine minutes, 53, in the lead at the moment. Ooh! 298 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:01,400 Well done, Amy. Very good. OK. Ooh! It's not bad. 299 00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:05,559 Shut up! It's the end of part one. 300 00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:07,479 You think I want you talking? Shut up! 301 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,200 We'll see you in a bit. 302 00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:18,879 Welcome back to Taskmaster, 303 00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:22,760 where Alex is tormenting our cast with his horrible, whiny voice. 304 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:26,559 ♪ Red, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 305 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:28,879 Yes, they just have to follow my simple instructions 306 00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:31,759 to stack the coloured bricks in the correct order. 307 00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:32,799 When happy with that order, 308 00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:35,199 they need to clap three times to end the task - 309 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:38,679 I can't stress enough how important that bit is. 310 00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:41,759 And so comes the turn of two guys with very manly names. 311 00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:44,480 It's Armando and Kumail - hunky. 312 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:48,719 That. That can go there. 313 00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:51,999 At the bottom of the tower, there is a red brick. 314 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:55,039 {\an8}At the top of the tower, there is a blue brick. 315 00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:56,359 Blue is the top. 316 00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:59,199 You must now sing these words with me. 317 00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:01,199 ♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 318 00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,039 ♪ Blue, green, yellow, yellow... ♪ Your turn. 319 00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:05,359 {\an8}♪ Blue, green, yellow, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 320 00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:08,399 BUZZER BUZZES The bottom brick is red, 321 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:09,559 remember? Yes. 322 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:11,599 And the top one is blue. OK. 323 00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:13,359 Now wink at the camera. 324 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,639 {\an8}♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 325 00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:17,480 Lovely. This is like Guantanamo Bay. 326 00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:23,199 From the bottom it goes red, something, something, red, 327 00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:26,719 something, something, green, something, something, blue. 328 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:28,159 Oh, my God! 329 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,840 {\an8}♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 330 00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:34,560 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 331 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:44,159 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 332 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:46,679 When you think you have built the correct tower, 333 00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:49,080 you must clap three times. 334 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:51,999 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 335 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:53,719 Uh-huh. 336 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:55,479 The even bricks are... 337 00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:57,879 ♪ Yellow, red, yellow, yellow, blue. ♪ 338 00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:00,999 Yellow, red, yellow, yellow, blue. 339 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:03,079 KUMAIL CHUCKLES 340 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:05,119 When you think you have built the correct tower, 341 00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:07,079 you must clap three times. 342 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:09,640 ♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, fucking red. ♪ 343 00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:13,199 {\an8}♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 344 00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:15,239 {\an8}Which is that. Have you nearly finished? 345 00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,039 Pardon? Have you nearly finished? 346 00:16:17,040 --> 00:16:18,119 I don't know! 347 00:16:18,120 --> 00:16:20,479 ARMANDO CLEARS THROAT 348 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,119 Thanks, Kumail. How's it going? 349 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:24,039 I mean, I'm miserable. 350 00:16:24,040 --> 00:16:26,040 You must clap three times. 351 00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,879 {\an8}♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 352 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:30,999 Yes! Your turn. 353 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,679 ♪ Blue, green, yellow, green, yellow. ♪ 354 00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:35,279 Now wink at the camera. 355 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:37,359 I've stopped the clock. Oh, my God! 356 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,800 I forgot you could clap! 357 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:44,279 I've stopped the clock, Armando. 358 00:16:44,280 --> 00:16:46,279 I forgot I could stop it at any time. 359 00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:48,319 I thought I had to listen to all of this. 360 00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:51,080 Yeah, I enjoyed that. I'm glad YOU enjoyed it. 361 00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:54,919 You finished it half your time ago. 362 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:57,879 So I did this for twice as long as I needed to? 363 00:16:57,880 --> 00:16:59,000 Exactly that, yeah. 364 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:07,519 I mean, absolutely textbook, 365 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:09,519 apart from forgetting the three claps. 366 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:10,759 Your wink was incredible. 367 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:13,199 Oh, my God! Wowee! Oh, my God, it was really nice. 368 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,119 One of the loveliest winks I've ever seen. Yeah. 369 00:17:15,120 --> 00:17:17,479 Well, when I was very young, my dad told me, 370 00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:19,159 "You should be able to wink so that 371 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,319 "only the person you're winking at knows you're winking." 372 00:17:21,320 --> 00:17:22,360 Wow. 373 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,120 What a creepy bit of advice. 374 00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:30,679 Now... 375 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,639 Yes. Did you have a good time during that? 376 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:35,719 One part of my brain, I was enjoying myself, 377 00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:39,119 and another part, I was thinking, "Why?" Yeah. 378 00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:41,279 Yeah. Oh, I mean, just reordering coloured bricks, 379 00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:43,119 you started weirdly coughing. 380 00:17:43,120 --> 00:17:44,399 Yeah. 381 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:45,439 I don't know why I was coughing. 382 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:47,359 I thought... Maybe it's because I saw that thing about 383 00:17:47,360 --> 00:17:49,960 how it helped someone on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire... 384 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,159 ...so I was just, "Aah-hargh!" 385 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,439 It was just sort of... 386 00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:59,199 Don't take this the wrong way, it sort of felt like we were 387 00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:01,719 watching someone playing a game in an old people's home. 388 00:18:01,720 --> 00:18:04,039 Yeah. Yeah. 389 00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,000 I have taken it the wrong way. 390 00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:11,439 Tell me some times. Yeah. 391 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:13,599 Well, I mean, obviously, Kumail would have been 392 00:18:13,600 --> 00:18:15,639 the fastest so far by quite a long way... 393 00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:18,639 Really? ..had he clapped when he was told to clap. Aw. 394 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,119 But 12 minutes 06. 395 00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:21,799 Literally couldn't be closer to Armando's, 396 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,679 because he was 12 minutes 30. 397 00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:24,999 Oh. Couldn't be closer. 398 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:29,959 Who's next? Finally, it's time to see Joanna Page stacking it. 399 00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:30,960 I'm on. 400 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:34,600 {\an8}OK, that's for the top. 401 00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,839 {\an8}♪ Blue, red, yellow, yellow, red. ♪ 402 00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:41,600 What the hell is it? It's green. 403 00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:46,839 Then a yellow brick, then another brick. 404 00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:49,519 The top is blue, so that must be green. 405 00:18:49,520 --> 00:18:51,959 This is... It's not right. It's not right. 406 00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:53,960 Is there anything else that's going to show me? 407 00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:57,639 Waah! 408 00:18:57,640 --> 00:18:59,799 AUDIENCE GASP There. That's where it is. 409 00:18:59,800 --> 00:19:02,080 Right. Right. 410 00:19:03,720 --> 00:19:04,800 OK. Right. 411 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:07,319 I've stopped the clock. 412 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:10,479 I mean, I genuinely probably would have kept going all day. 413 00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,760 Yeah, I think so. You were nowhere near getting it right. 414 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:21,240 Wow! Wow! 415 00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:26,599 Well done. Well, I didn't trust you. I knew something was up. 416 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,399 And also, I just couldn't follow the song. 417 00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:30,079 She was getting nowhere near. It was just like... Yeah. 418 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:33,399 It took her eight minutes, 50. Ooh. 419 00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:36,199 If we went by who did the tower first, 420 00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:37,639 I would have had the shortest time? 421 00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:39,319 Yeah. You did it the best and the second worst. 422 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:40,759 That's life, though, isn't it? Mm. 423 00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:44,720 If I hadn't consistently eaten pies my whole life, I'd be able to run. 424 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:51,199 Unfortunately, Armando, you're last with one point. 425 00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:52,479 Kumail, you get two points 426 00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:54,480 because you were so slow in the end. Don't... 427 00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:57,999 Joel was third, three points. Four points to Amy. 428 00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,920 But Joanna Page gets the full five points. Yay! 429 00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,399 Feels like it's scoreboard time, is it? 430 00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:08,399 It is, and it's so close at this stage. 431 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:11,719 Armando, Joanna and Kumail in joint second on six points. 432 00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:13,399 Amy's in the lead with seven points. 433 00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:16,800 Whoa! Wa-hey! Sorry, Joel. And Joel. 434 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,559 Give me more task. 435 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:21,479 Yes, and just like our relationship, 436 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:25,080 this task involves an equal amount of hugging and grunting. Mm. 437 00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:39,039 Oh, look. Right, here's the donkey. He's... 438 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,679 Oh, my God, he's got plasters on his bum. 439 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:43,719 Hello, Joel. Hello! Hello, Amy. 440 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:44,999 Hey! Hello, Kumail. 441 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,039 Please don't touch that or look underneath it. Sorry. 442 00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:50,479 Shall we...? Yes. Let's have a look. 443 00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:55,359 "Paint the best painting of the painting while hugging." 444 00:20:55,360 --> 00:20:57,119 Right. Oh, that must be the painting. Excellent. 445 00:20:57,120 --> 00:21:01,159 "One person must always look at the original painting 446 00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:05,119 "and hug the other two people with both arms. 447 00:21:05,120 --> 00:21:06,719 "The other two people 448 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:09,719 "must always look at the new painting." 449 00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:12,199 "The hugger may only grunt." 450 00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,039 Did you write this? 451 00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:17,799 "The painter may ask questions for one minute..." 452 00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:19,479 "..then for the rest of the task, 453 00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:22,959 "they may only say colours, shapes or directions." 454 00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:26,679 "Colours, shapes or directions." You have ten minutes. 455 00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:29,319 "Your time starts on the whistle." 456 00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:32,079 I can't draw for toffee. I don't mind. 457 00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:34,439 Do you want to have a go? OK. I'll paint, yeah. OK. 458 00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:35,839 I kind of want to paint. You want to paint? OK. 459 00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:37,479 Do you want to paint? All right. 460 00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:38,959 I might actually... Right, you've got to... 461 00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,479 ...put my hands under there. Yeah. 462 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:42,799 I'm going to get a paintbrush in each hand. Yeah, yeah. 463 00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:44,919 OK.OK. WHISTLE BLOWS 464 00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:47,240 Are you looking at the painting? KUMAIL GRUNTS 465 00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:53,199 I had no idea... Mm. 466 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:55,359 ...on top of all of your many talents, 467 00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:57,839 that you could do impressions. 468 00:21:57,840 --> 00:22:00,839 Who's that? Oh, you don't know your own impression? 469 00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:02,359 Let's see it again. 470 00:22:02,360 --> 00:22:03,799 HE GRUNTS 471 00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:05,520 "Painting, I am!" 472 00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:10,119 Let's see them do some painting. 473 00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:12,239 Yes. Here they all are, painting and grunting 474 00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:14,880 and holding each other tightly. GREG GRUNTS 475 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:18,439 {\an8}Is it a human? Uh-huh. 476 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:20,559 It's a human. Is it the Prime Minister? 477 00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:22,119 Uh-uh. 478 00:22:22,120 --> 00:22:24,119 Is it an animal? Uh-huh! 479 00:22:24,120 --> 00:22:25,639 Yes, it's an animal. Yeah. 480 00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:27,679 Is it a horse? Is it a donkey? 481 00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:29,679 Urgh! It's a donkey? 482 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,599 Urgh! No, a horse. Argh-ah! 483 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:32,919 Is it a man? Uh-huh. 484 00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:34,959 Is it just his head or is it all of his body? 485 00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:36,479 Hu-er, ah, eh, er! 486 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:39,399 It's a... He on a ho-rse! 487 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:40,719 He's on a horse? 488 00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:42,519 Is that grunting? Yeah. 489 00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:44,039 He's on a horse. Uh-huh. 490 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,839 It's a horse with a jockey? Uh-huh! 491 00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,040 Is it Putin? Uh-uh. OK. 492 00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:54,319 Is the horse brown? Uh-huh! 493 00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:55,519 I'm going to start on a brown horse. 494 00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:58,199 WHISTLE BLOWS - Is there anything...?No. - Oh! 495 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,199 Colours, shapes and directions, please. 496 00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:02,359 Is there blue? Uh-huh! Is there red? 497 00:23:02,360 --> 00:23:04,439 Yellow? Is there yellow? Orange? 498 00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:06,399 Uh-uh. Uh-uh. 499 00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:07,759 Skin colour, white? 500 00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,239 Skin colour? 501 00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:10,480 Is that...? It's a shape? 502 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:13,959 Colours, shapes and directions, Joanna. 503 00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:16,320 Colours, shapes... Running?! No. Up? 504 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:20,839 Any squares? Uh-uh. 505 00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:22,239 Square? Uh-uh. 506 00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:23,999 Any circles? Circle? 507 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,039 Any triangles? Triangle? 508 00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:28,800 Diamond? Uh-uh. Uh-uh. 509 00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:32,519 What other shapes are there? 510 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,599 Rhombus? ARMANDO CAWS 511 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:37,479 Bird? Seagull? Uh-huh! In the sky? 512 00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:38,999 Green? Uh-uh. 513 00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:41,959 I've done quite a lot of green. Uh. 514 00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:43,999 Brown down? KUMAIL GRUNTS 515 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,879 Brown. Brown. Is that...? Do brown down. 516 00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:50,120 BOTH GRUNTING 517 00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:56,759 WHISTLE BLOWS Please stop painting. 518 00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:57,880 Do not look back. 519 00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:01,000 Kumail, you can look at what they did. 520 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:05,759 Honestly, it's not bad. 521 00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:08,440 Ah! Yeah! 522 00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:16,319 You did some interesting grunting, Armando. 523 00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:18,799 I've never heard anyone grunt "he's on a horse" before. 524 00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:20,839 Yeah, I know. 525 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:22,679 Yeah, there was a bit of flexibility on the rules. 526 00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:26,079 They also said leg as a shape, and I guess a leg is a shape. 527 00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:28,920 Well, no, it isn't. Is it not? No, it isn't a shape. 528 00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:31,639 Is it not? No. 529 00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:33,879 If someone told you to draw a leg shape, 530 00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:35,519 you'd know exactly what to draw. 531 00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:37,960 That's true. Very clever. 532 00:24:40,360 --> 00:24:43,959 We'll see their paintings after you have watched some adverts 533 00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:45,999 and Alex has flossed me. 534 00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,160 Bring forth the gooch floss! 535 00:24:57,720 --> 00:24:59,119 Welcome back to Taskmaster, 536 00:24:59,120 --> 00:25:02,519 and an intimate team task involving painting and grunting. 537 00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:05,759 Oh, yes. One person from each team could look at the original painting 538 00:25:05,760 --> 00:25:07,679 while the painters held them and asked questions. 539 00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:11,119 The answers could, of course, only come in the form of grunts, 540 00:25:11,120 --> 00:25:13,439 or in Armando's case, quite a lot of words. 541 00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:17,079 Let's see the Team of 3's picture first of all. 542 00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:20,999 This is what Joel, Amy and Kumail came up with. 543 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,359 {\an8}Ooh. 544 00:25:22,360 --> 00:25:25,280 {\an8}Pretty good. Unseen! Not bad. Wow. 545 00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:30,120 Who's to say that Freddie Mercury didn't ride horses? 546 00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:33,439 {\an8}We don't know. R-I-P. 547 00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:35,359 {\an8}Look at all those beautiful leg shapes. 548 00:25:35,360 --> 00:25:36,559 Yeah. 549 00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:38,719 And look at the direction of the horse as we compare the two. 550 00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:41,639 Yeah. Oh. 551 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:43,519 The only thing that's let it down. It's pretty good. 552 00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:44,999 Yeah, it's pretty good. That's not bad. 553 00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,280 Quite a coquettish back leg from their horse. 554 00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:51,920 "May I?" 555 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:54,999 You might not think it's quite as good when you see 556 00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:56,959 what the team of two managed to come up with. Let's go. 557 00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:58,320 Ready? They did this. 558 00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:11,359 Oh, my God! 559 00:26:11,360 --> 00:26:13,079 That was with Armando saying full words! 560 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:14,239 Yeah. 561 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:18,639 I think I made the mistake by facing the man forward, 562 00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:21,560 because that's what Putin does in the photo I've seen of him. 563 00:26:23,120 --> 00:26:25,919 {\an8}So the man's forward, but the horse is sideways. 564 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:27,519 {\an8}And you can see it's got... What? Where's the horse? 565 00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:29,359 Hang on, where's the horse? 566 00:26:29,360 --> 00:26:32,759 It's ears are this way... No, the only way that's a horse is 567 00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:35,440 if it was painted seconds after it was hit by a bazooka! 568 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,039 I haven't said this in 20 series, 569 00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:42,160 but I sort of think you should be removed from the show. 570 00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:47,559 Let's have a look at all three. 571 00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:49,559 OK, all three, and then, some points, please, Greg. 572 00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:54,719 It says something when that painting of Freddie Mercury 573 00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:59,760 sitting on the back of an anteater is by far the best picture. 574 00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:02,439 So is that five points for the team of three? 575 00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:04,439 Of course. Right. Of course. 576 00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:07,800 And now it's... "How low do we go?" I suppose. 577 00:27:09,360 --> 00:27:11,239 So, I was going to give you two points, 578 00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:14,599 but you do you need to be penalised for Armando's flagrant cheating, 579 00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:16,839 so you'll have one point and you'll thank me for it. 580 00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:18,319 It's one for the team of two. 581 00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:20,720 It's five for the team of three. Thank you. Well done. 582 00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:26,279 Let's get on with the next task, please. OK. 583 00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:28,479 And Taskmaster gets all classy now, 584 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:32,599 as this task involves ascension via a gilded royal staircase, 585 00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:35,040 upon which there are boobs. 586 00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:49,200 Alex. Kumail. 587 00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:54,559 Ah. 588 00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:56,920 Ooh! 589 00:27:59,040 --> 00:28:01,399 Have you seen it? Have I seen what? 590 00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:03,239 This. 591 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:05,639 I like the echo. Me too. 592 00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:08,320 How are you? Good. 593 00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:11,920 There's so many boobs. 594 00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:14,120 Greg did the high ones. 595 00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:20,759 It's the alphabet. Nothing gets by me. 596 00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:23,439 "Get to the top of the staircase. 597 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:26,600 "You must take one step at a time. 598 00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:32,920 "On each step, you must discard a letter and say at least one word. 599 00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:35,759 "You must not use a word..." 600 00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:36,999 I'll have to start it again 601 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:38,719 because I'm not listening to what I'm saying. 602 00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:40,119 I'm performing now. 603 00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:44,640 "Get to the top of the staircase." 604 00:28:46,080 --> 00:28:47,759 This feels like a bit of me, this. 605 00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:49,719 "You must take one step at a time." 606 00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:54,800 "On each step, you must discard a letter and say at least one word." 607 00:28:55,960 --> 00:29:00,039 "You must not use a word containing a letter you have discarded..." 608 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:03,039 "..and you must not repeat any words at any point..." 609 00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:04,599 Nah, it's not a bit of me, this. 610 00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:06,959 Really not a bit of me. 611 00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:09,439 "You must not repeat any words at any point..." 612 00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:11,279 "..otherwise you must start again. 613 00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:13,959 "Highest step reached wins. 614 00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:17,839 "You have ten minutes. Your time starts on the whistle." 615 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:19,040 Do you understand? 616 00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:21,320 That's very condescending. 617 00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:24,479 Yes, I understand. 618 00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:26,079 It's pretty simple. 619 00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:28,599 All the information is on the task. 620 00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:30,279 {\an8}If you want to put on the alphabet gauntlet. 621 00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:31,320 Uh... 622 00:29:33,320 --> 00:29:34,360 Look at this. 623 00:29:35,880 --> 00:29:37,279 This is going to go badly. 624 00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:39,040 There are 25 steps. 625 00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:43,279 Are there 25 letters in the alphabet? 626 00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:44,479 There are, aren't they? 627 00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:46,800 - Are there? - Roughly. WHISTLE BLOWS 628 00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:52,679 So early on, you said, 629 00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:55,119 "Oh, this is a bit of me, this is," right? 630 00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:58,359 And then later, you went, "Oh, actually, this is not a bit of me." 631 00:29:58,360 --> 00:30:01,519 What happened to change your mind that this was a bit of you? 632 00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:03,679 I realised that when I said, "Oh, this is a bit of me..." 633 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:05,279 Yeah. 634 00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:07,240 ...it was just steps. Right. 635 00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:11,160 That's what I'm intrigued by. So... 636 00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:15,720 So, the thing that's a bit of you is walking up steps? Yeah. 637 00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:20,759 And I'm always interested in digging into an actor's method. 638 00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:25,280 Your method is to say the words, but not think about them. 639 00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:30,200 Yes. Yes! 640 00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:33,479 Yeah. 641 00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:34,999 Right, who are we going to see first? 642 00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,279 First up, it's Ian, Dom and Page. 643 00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:39,920 That's Iannucci, Dommett and Joanna Page. 644 00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:49,239 Hi. 645 00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:51,079 Just say the letter and then the word, that would be great. 646 00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:52,799 {\an8}Z. Hi. 647 00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,079 {\an8}H-I? Yeah, H-I. OK. 648 00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:57,079 {\an8}You've now said, "Yeah," as well, so just... 649 00:30:57,080 --> 00:30:58,680 {\an8}Let's not say yes again, please. 650 00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,040 I'm discarding the letter X. 651 00:31:06,880 --> 00:31:07,880 ...Z. 652 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,519 G. 653 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:16,159 N. 654 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:17,160 T. 655 00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,439 Back. What's the letter? T. 656 00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:22,839 T. Back. OK. 657 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:24,680 What's the letter? S. Mm-hm. 658 00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,000 What's the letter? R. Yep. 659 00:31:31,080 --> 00:31:32,319 K. 660 00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:33,399 Y. 661 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:34,520 J. Pool. 662 00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:37,639 F. 663 00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:40,039 {\an8}Yeah, you've got a T in helicopter, unfortunately. 664 00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:43,240 Yes, but you can't use words using any of these letters. 665 00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:45,920 Yeah, it's harder than you thought it was. 666 00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:48,479 Same. 667 00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:49,959 Pardon? 668 00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:51,559 Well, I don't think you can say that really, 669 00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:53,439 because what was the one you just put down? Mm. 670 00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:55,040 So now you have to pick them all up and start again. 671 00:31:56,120 --> 00:31:57,279 {\an8}Yep. Don't say anything else. 672 00:31:57,280 --> 00:31:58,399 OK. 673 00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,280 Yep. OK. 674 00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:07,120 ...W. B. U. O. 675 00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:09,639 Lovely. 676 00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:11,679 We're halfway through the alphabet. 677 00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:13,439 Well, you can't really say, "Yes," 678 00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:15,360 because you've got rid of Y. 679 00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:18,359 Sorry about that. Can I ask a question? 680 00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:20,319 Do I have to say, "I'm discarding the letter"? 681 00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:21,839 I don't know why you're doing that. 682 00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:23,439 I thought you said... 683 00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:25,799 Well, this changes everything. 684 00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:27,199 G. 685 00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:28,200 B. 686 00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:30,360 S. 687 00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:34,999 No. Start again. 688 00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:36,000 Y. 689 00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:38,999 X. 690 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:40,159 Soppy. 691 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:41,919 You've had Y, though, so start again. 692 00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:42,920 Oh! 693 00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:46,080 R. 694 00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:49,640 This is where we got to last time. 695 00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:53,959 Wank. 696 00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:55,000 Pardon? 697 00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,359 Are you saying, "Wank"? Right, start again. 698 00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:01,319 {\an8}The W. No. Yeah. There's a W in wank. 699 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:02,439 Also not appropriate. 700 00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:04,279 One minute, 30 left. Oh, no! 701 00:33:04,280 --> 00:33:05,280 Q. 702 00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:07,399 Z. 703 00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:08,800 {\an8}Still got a minute 20. 704 00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:15,560 I. 45 seconds. 705 00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:21,200 {\an8}How are we spelling nail? 706 00:33:24,080 --> 00:33:26,240 Is it with an I? No. 707 00:33:28,680 --> 00:33:31,040 Are we spelling it wrong? Yeah. 708 00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:34,800 Um... 709 00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:39,720 Yeah, we've only got 15 seconds now. 710 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:42,079 ...and, like, spell stuff off that. 711 00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:44,319 Well, you said that twice, so start again. 712 00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:46,039 You've got ten seconds. 713 00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:48,919 Should I just take this ten seconds just to think for, like, a moment? 714 00:33:48,920 --> 00:33:50,839 Just enjoy the fact that we're in a beautiful place? 715 00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:52,560 Yeah, yeah. Let's have a look around. 716 00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:58,679 WHISTLE BLOWS 717 00:33:58,680 --> 00:33:59,920 B. 718 00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:05,119 WHISTLE BLOWS And that is your time up. 719 00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:06,879 Your language in the last one wasn't great. 720 00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:07,999 Yeah. Lovely. 721 00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:09,439 "Imdsca the N-L-F." 722 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:10,839 Yes. 723 00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:12,159 Right, 724 00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:13,520 I'm off for some ice cream. 725 00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,679 I wrote out that Joel and Armando 726 00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:26,799 are very different men, aren't they? Mm. 727 00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:28,519 And my evidence for that was 728 00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:31,960 that your opener was "hi" and his was "dromedary". 729 00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:37,559 Would you all like to see a grown man say words 730 00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:39,639 that he knows he shouldn't be saying? 731 00:34:39,640 --> 00:34:40,680 Let's have a look at that. 732 00:34:44,200 --> 00:34:45,200 Wank. 733 00:34:48,640 --> 00:34:49,760 Yeah. 734 00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:54,559 It's so cute. 735 00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:56,239 It's like a lady's gone to you, "Right, we've kissed. 736 00:34:56,240 --> 00:34:57,960 "What should we do next?" And you're like... 737 00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:00,240 ..."Wank?" 738 00:35:02,040 --> 00:35:04,519 You started going "fuck" and "piss" as well! 739 00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:07,839 Yeah. I shouted, "Bomb!" of which I just thought... 740 00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:09,679 I know. I know. I just couldn't help it. 741 00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:11,279 I wrote down something when you started "bomb." Yeah. 742 00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:14,359 I wrote, "Armando started to look like 743 00:35:14,360 --> 00:35:16,680 "a politician having a breakdown in Westminster." 744 00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:20,519 Joanna was most confident in her decisions, I think. Mm. Yes. 745 00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:23,559 I had a system, and it was animals, and that... 746 00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:25,679 Every third word you said was an animal... 747 00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:27,759 Was it? ..which is a strange pattern of vocabulary. 748 00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:30,079 She got the highest out of these three, 749 00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:31,440 except for Armando. 750 00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:34,959 You got the 11th step, Armando the 12th. 751 00:35:34,960 --> 00:35:36,719 Joel, very pleased with his eight. 752 00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:38,639 "I'll take that. I'll take eight." 753 00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:40,359 Yeah, I'll definitely take that. 754 00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:41,720 I just enjoyed the stairs. Yeah. 755 00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:44,799 Right, that's the end of part three. 756 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:48,519 In part four, someone will win a hip flask, a parachute, 757 00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:51,879 some melatonin, a video of a lady dancing in the nude 758 00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:53,919 and a trolley with Lorraine Kelly in it. 759 00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:55,759 It sounds like one hell of a night out. 760 00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:56,920 Count me in! 761 00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:07,999 Welcome back to the final part of the show, 762 00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:12,279 and the task which feels like a sad metaphor for the ageing process. 763 00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:13,639 Yes, I suppose you're right - 764 00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:14,919 they're struggling to get up the stairs, 765 00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:17,279 then forgetting what they're doing and heading back down again, 766 00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:19,959 and they seem to have lost the most basic of vocabulary. 767 00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:21,719 It's a laugh, though, isn't it, Greg? 768 00:36:21,720 --> 00:36:23,799 It's a laugh. Simple rules. Simple rules. 769 00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:25,159 Lose a letter every step, 770 00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:27,919 and don't repeat words or say words that contain the lost letters. 771 00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:30,640 Just two people left to go. It is Amy and Kumail. 772 00:36:35,880 --> 00:36:38,319 {\an8}Put it on the floor. 773 00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:40,519 {\an8}Wherever you want. 774 00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:42,520 {\an8}Right, now pick it up and start again. 775 00:36:44,440 --> 00:36:46,999 {\an8}You've discarded X and then used the word "box," which has an X in it. 776 00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:49,360 I wanted to do it the other way around, didn't I? Yes. 777 00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:51,680 Z. 778 00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:54,520 Hello. X. 779 00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:56,840 Hi. 780 00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:59,439 {\an8}Box. No, you've said box. 781 00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:00,440 You can't repeat words. 782 00:37:03,720 --> 00:37:04,959 On the step. 783 00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:06,280 No, you've got to be on the step. 784 00:37:09,040 --> 00:37:10,479 {\an8}You can say X. That would be helpful. 785 00:37:10,480 --> 00:37:11,799 {\an8}X. Great. 786 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:13,560 And what word are you going to say? 787 00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:19,559 W. 788 00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:20,599 J. 789 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:21,639 G. 790 00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:23,439 L. F. 791 00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:24,840 V. 792 00:37:28,080 --> 00:37:29,080 {\an8}Wow. 793 00:37:35,800 --> 00:37:36,840 C. 794 00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:40,919 Hour. Hour, spelling...? 795 00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:42,759 H-our. 796 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:44,280 H. Our. 797 00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:46,600 U. 798 00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:49,159 S. 799 00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:50,319 E. 800 00:37:50,320 --> 00:37:51,759 T. 801 00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:52,880 E. 802 00:37:55,120 --> 00:37:56,120 I. 803 00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:01,400 FANFARE TRUMPET PLAYS 804 00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:03,680 N. 805 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:06,040 A. 806 00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:09,839 FANFARE TRUMPET PLAYS 807 00:38:09,840 --> 00:38:12,240 AMY SQUEALS 808 00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:19,319 What a performance from both, really... 809 00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:20,919 Mm. Strong. ..wasn't it? Yeah. 810 00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:24,119 Apart from the double "box" nightmare. Oh, yeah. 811 00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:25,799 I didn't quite get it and then I got it. 812 00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:27,399 Then you got it. You got it. And then I got it. 813 00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,879 And I knew you were sure when you got to the word "loaf" 814 00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:33,279 because you said "loaf" so threateningly. 815 00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:34,759 Lurrf. Lurrf. 816 00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:36,159 Very Hull. Yeah. 817 00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:39,679 I never thought I would see a grown man discard 818 00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:42,919 a child's play letter and say, "I," 819 00:38:42,920 --> 00:38:45,760 and internally, go, "Oh, he's so cool." 820 00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:50,839 I feel like that was the best I ever did on any of the tasks. 821 00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:53,919 Well, you say that - there's a slight... Oh, no, don't do this! 822 00:38:53,920 --> 00:38:55,999 Oh, yes! Yes! No! Can I say something? 823 00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:57,839 Can I...? Don't... What? Sorry. 824 00:38:57,840 --> 00:38:59,120 Hey, hey, hey. 825 00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:02,279 Ten seconds ago, I was saying how cool you were. 826 00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:04,320 Yeah. Can I say something? 827 00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:08,039 Wiggle your boobs. When... 828 00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:09,960 Oh, my God! 829 00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:13,239 Whoa! 830 00:39:13,240 --> 00:39:15,639 The thing was, you ended up with two letters 831 00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:18,839 and Amy ended up with one letter when they got to the top. 832 00:39:18,840 --> 00:39:21,319 25 steps, 26 letters, but you still had two left. 833 00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:22,960 Imagine if I did better. 834 00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:26,680 Nowhere near, Joel. Nowhere near. 835 00:39:28,880 --> 00:39:30,760 There's no way Wank Boy's beaten him! 836 00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:33,719 We laugh about this episode - 837 00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:35,719 it started with someone struggling with a wink 838 00:39:35,720 --> 00:39:37,560 and ended with someone struggling with a wank. 839 00:39:39,640 --> 00:39:41,320 Isn't that life? That's great. 840 00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:46,560 Oh, that's a lovely bit of work. 841 00:39:48,040 --> 00:39:51,160 Once you've all gone, we'll re-record that with me saying it. 842 00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:55,879 Well, we couldn't understand what happened with all the letters, 843 00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:56,960 so have a look at this. 844 00:39:58,000 --> 00:39:59,480 H. Our. 845 00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:03,639 S. Rib. 846 00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:05,999 U. Was it rib or rip? 847 00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:07,000 B. 848 00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:11,679 U. U. 849 00:40:11,680 --> 00:40:14,240 AUDIENCE GASP 850 00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:19,479 FANFARE TRUMPET PLAYS 851 00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:21,679 Thank you. Thank you. Congratulations. 852 00:40:21,680 --> 00:40:23,880 Thank you. I know the alphabet. 853 00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:28,119 You didn't discard the U on a step 854 00:40:28,120 --> 00:40:29,959 until you took a second step with the U. 855 00:40:29,960 --> 00:40:32,599 So you took one extra step. 856 00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:34,759 You had already got to 20 at that point. 857 00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:39,759 I just want you to know that I did not cheat on purpose. 858 00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:41,039 That was an oversight. 859 00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:42,519 I would never cheat. 860 00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:43,640 That's what Nixon said. 861 00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:49,919 I am not a cheat. So points-wise, eight steps for Joel, one point. 862 00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:51,239 Joanna got to 11, two points. 863 00:40:51,240 --> 00:40:52,839 Armando, 12, three points. 864 00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:54,439 Kumail, you got to 20 steps so you get four points. 865 00:40:54,440 --> 00:40:56,759 But the winner, 25 steps, all of them, 866 00:40:56,760 --> 00:40:58,759 and five points to Amy Gledhill! Aw! 867 00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:00,160 So... 868 00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:03,919 ...let's take a look at the scores, then, shall we? 869 00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:07,159 Yes. I think we could have a first look at the series scoreboard. 870 00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:08,239 An early look at that. 871 00:41:08,240 --> 00:41:10,199 We have three men in their 30s. 872 00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:11,319 Kumail's on 37, 873 00:41:11,320 --> 00:41:13,639 Armando, 36, and Joel, 35. 874 00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:15,759 Two women in their 50s. 875 00:41:15,760 --> 00:41:17,239 Way ahead. 876 00:41:17,240 --> 00:41:20,479 Joanna's got 50 and Amy's got 53 at this stage. 877 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,480 Wow. Wow. Yes. 878 00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:25,760 Yes. And also... 879 00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:29,080 Oh, for God's sake. 880 00:41:30,240 --> 00:41:32,639 {\an8}Take it out. Take it out. 881 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:35,039 {\an8}Take it out. Take it out. 882 00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:36,959 {\an8}Take it out! Take it out! 883 00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:39,160 {\an8}It's taking so long today! Ah! 884 00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:41,880 Just in time. Just in time. 885 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:44,719 OK, everyone, 886 00:41:44,720 --> 00:41:47,680 please make your way to the stage for the final task of the show! 887 00:41:57,880 --> 00:41:59,799 Hello, you delightful cherub. 888 00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:02,800 Hello, Greg. These are available at just 19.99. 889 00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:08,799 Who will be reading the task out? 890 00:42:08,800 --> 00:42:10,160 Armando Iannucci. 891 00:42:11,720 --> 00:42:14,399 The colonel. OK, here we go. 892 00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:16,839 {\an8}"Transfer Greg's balls 893 00:42:16,840 --> 00:42:19,639 {\an8}"from your bucket to your beaker. 894 00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:21,799 "You must wave with one hand at all times 895 00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:25,679 "and that hand must not touch balls or snooker cues. 896 00:42:25,680 --> 00:42:27,679 "Also, your snooker cue must balance 897 00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:30,239 "with one end touching the table at all times, 898 00:42:30,240 --> 00:42:32,999 "and you can only touch your snooker cue 899 00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:35,439 "with your non-waving hand. 900 00:42:35,440 --> 00:42:39,239 "For every one of Alex's balls that ends up in your beaker, 901 00:42:39,240 --> 00:42:42,959 "three of Greg's balls will be subtracted from your score." 902 00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:45,559 I'm already questioning this as I'm reading it. 903 00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:47,479 "You have 100 seconds. 904 00:42:47,480 --> 00:42:49,039 "Most Greg's balls wins." 905 00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:52,079 They had to be Greg's balls, did they, for this task? 906 00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:54,440 Everyone likes them. Wow. Really? Everyone. 907 00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:58,119 You can all grasp your cues now, as Armando is. 908 00:42:58,120 --> 00:42:59,599 Mm-hm. OK. 909 00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:01,039 And have one hand ready to wave. 910 00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:02,639 So they must be waving at all times. 911 00:43:02,640 --> 00:43:04,639 Greg, if they don't wave, we need to be on them. 912 00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:07,159 Oh, I'll be on them like a puma. It's grab and go. 913 00:43:07,160 --> 00:43:10,719 Start waving and start transferring balls. 914 00:43:10,720 --> 00:43:11,760 They're off. 915 00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:18,239 Wave, Joel. Waving. 916 00:43:18,240 --> 00:43:19,879 Waving, please, Joel. 917 00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:21,280 Waving, Joel. Waving! 918 00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:26,999 Waving. Whoa, no! 919 00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:28,879 Ah! Ooh. 920 00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:30,760 Waving. Waving. 921 00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:33,319 Next one. 922 00:43:33,320 --> 00:43:34,920 Waving. 923 00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:38,199 Hello, Kumail. Right. 924 00:43:38,200 --> 00:43:39,280 N-ah! 925 00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:43,079 - Good. - N-ah! JOANNA CHUCKLES 926 00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:45,760 Hello, Amy. Hello, everybody. 927 00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:49,959 Oh! Oh, Armando! 928 00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:51,959 Your balls are everywhere, Greg! 929 00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:53,479 Oh, my God! Ah! 930 00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:57,160 Right. OK. 15 seconds left, everyone. 931 00:44:02,480 --> 00:44:04,519 Eight seconds left. Wave. 932 00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:06,240 Waving. 933 00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:11,039 Three, two, one. 934 00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:13,160 WHISTLE BLOWS Stop! 935 00:44:15,840 --> 00:44:18,280 You've got some Alex... I've got some Alexes. 936 00:44:19,600 --> 00:44:20,759 Argh. 937 00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:22,759 Well, Greg, I'll have to count up how many Alex balls 938 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:24,879 there are in their beakers. Yes. 939 00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:26,639 I'll be honest, halfway through, 940 00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:29,519 I forgot which one was supposed to be in there, 941 00:44:29,520 --> 00:44:31,119 the Gregs or the Alexes. 942 00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:33,519 Which one were we supposed to have in? Greg. Greg. Greg. 943 00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:35,159 Greg's balls, yeah. Greg. Greg. 944 00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:36,560 Well, it was fun. 945 00:44:38,200 --> 00:44:39,999 Listen, we'll add them up, we'll add it to your final scores. 946 00:44:40,000 --> 00:44:41,120 Yeah! Come down and join me. 947 00:44:48,840 --> 00:44:50,919 Well, well, well. Well, well, well, exactly. I was going to say that. 948 00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:52,479 Well, well, well. A lot of balls in tubes. 949 00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:54,839 Were they the right balls? Well, interesting. 950 00:44:54,840 --> 00:44:58,880 I mean, Amy and Joel both got 11 balls in tubes. 951 00:44:59,960 --> 00:45:01,759 Oh, Joel was like a machine during that. 952 00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:04,640 He was like a machine, but was he like a good machine? 953 00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:08,879 Six of me, five for Greg, so that's a score of -13. 954 00:45:08,880 --> 00:45:10,559 No! 955 00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:12,880 Oh... Wank? 956 00:45:18,960 --> 00:45:21,999 Armando and Joanna both put four of Greg's balls 957 00:45:22,000 --> 00:45:23,839 in the bucket correctly. 958 00:45:23,840 --> 00:45:25,159 Kumail put eight balls in. 959 00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:27,319 One was an Alex, which means you get a score of five. 960 00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:28,639 You're in second place, but the winner, 961 00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:31,599 five points, 11 of Greg's balls, Amy Gledhill again. 962 00:45:31,600 --> 00:45:33,559 Wow! 963 00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:35,000 Strong. Wow. 964 00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:38,999 You want to hear the final scores, then? 965 00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:40,479 I want to hear the final scores, then. 966 00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:42,879 In joint fourth, Joanna and Joel with 12 points, 967 00:45:42,880 --> 00:45:46,319 but in joint first by herself, it's Amy Gledhill with 22 points! 968 00:45:46,320 --> 00:45:48,279 Wow! Yay! 969 00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:51,159 Amy Gledhill wins the episode. 970 00:45:51,160 --> 00:45:55,079 Please head up to go silly with your string that pulls things! 971 00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:56,320 Yay! 972 00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:03,759 So what have we learnt today? Well, we've learnt a lot about people. 973 00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:05,879 Some actors don't think about what they're saying, 974 00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:07,439 they're just saying the words. 975 00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:09,399 Some people cough in words. 976 00:46:09,400 --> 00:46:12,839 Some people think that skin colour is a shape. 977 00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:14,879 It's been a funny old show. 978 00:46:14,880 --> 00:46:17,160 Started off with someone struggling with a wink... 979 00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:24,520 ...and ended with someone struggling with a wank. 980 00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:43,439 We're off again, but here's your winner. 981 00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:44,880 It's Amy Gledhill! 982 00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:08,320 Subtitles by Red Bee Media