1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,210 (person laughing) 2 00:00:03,210 --> 00:00:06,080 (people droning) 3 00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:21,560 (mellow soulful music) 4 00:00:39,790 --> 00:00:42,200 ♪ What's a man ♪ 5 00:00:42,290 --> 00:00:46,830 ♪ Without a woman ♪ 6 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:51,800 ♪ A fire without a spark ♪ 7 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:54,720 ♪ Where would man be without a woman ♪ 8 00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:56,470 - I want breasts. 9 00:00:56,550 --> 00:00:57,890 ♪ Laying cold and in the dark ♪ 10 00:00:57,970 --> 00:00:59,810 - [Employee] How do you want 'em? 11 00:00:59,890 --> 00:01:00,890 - Big. 12 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:03,640 And juicy. 13 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:06,940 - [Employee] Spicy or regular? 14 00:01:07,020 --> 00:01:08,020 - Bouncy. 15 00:01:08,110 --> 00:01:09,610 - [Employee] Anything else? 16 00:01:09,690 --> 00:01:10,940 - A wing. 17 00:01:11,020 --> 00:01:14,280 - [Employee] That's two spicy breasts and a wing. 18 00:01:16,950 --> 00:01:17,990 - Binjo! 19 00:01:18,070 --> 00:01:20,370 - [Employee] Drive through, please. 20 00:01:20,450 --> 00:01:22,700 ♪ Without a woman ♪ 21 00:01:22,790 --> 00:01:25,750 (car engine rumbling) 22 00:01:25,830 --> 00:01:27,000 - Hey, Turk. 23 00:01:28,210 --> 00:01:29,880 You wanna drink with that? 24 00:01:29,960 --> 00:01:32,340 - Sure, how about a Sex on the Beach 25 00:01:32,420 --> 00:01:35,300 followed by 12 orgasms? 26 00:01:36,300 --> 00:01:37,630 - You know we don't have no liquor. (chuckles) 27 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:40,640 - Lick her? (scoffs) 28 00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:42,260 I barely know her! 29 00:01:42,350 --> 00:01:45,930 (employee scoffs) 30 00:01:46,020 --> 00:01:47,560 (hand booms onto arm) 31 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:48,440 (upbeat rock music) 32 00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:50,900 (tires squealing) 33 00:01:50,980 --> 00:01:54,530 (upbeat rock music continues) 34 00:01:54,610 --> 00:01:59,490 ♪ Looking for some action on a Saturday night ♪ 35 00:02:01,490 --> 00:02:06,660 ♪ I head out to the clubs, ladies looking so right ♪ 36 00:02:08,830 --> 00:02:14,050 ♪ Buying fancy drinks, dropping pick up lines ♪ 37 00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:21,180 ♪ Hours getting late, man, you're running out of time ♪ 38 00:02:23,390 --> 00:02:25,180 ♪ First comes strike one ♪ 39 00:02:25,270 --> 00:02:27,060 ♪ Then comes strike two ♪ 40 00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:28,640 ♪ First strike you are out ♪ 41 00:02:28,730 --> 00:02:32,110 ♪ What you gonna do ♪ 42 00:02:32,190 --> 00:02:33,320 - Oh, yeah. 43 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:35,780 ♪ Look around the room ♪ 44 00:02:35,860 --> 00:02:41,070 ♪ And he struts out from the can ♪ 45 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:45,160 ♪ Get your money out, here comes the wingman ♪ 46 00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:48,660 ♪ Wingman, wingman ♪ 47 00:02:48,750 --> 00:02:50,370 ♪ When the ladies leave you standing ♪ 48 00:02:50,460 --> 00:02:52,580 ♪ With the drinks in your hand ♪ 49 00:02:52,670 --> 00:02:56,000 ♪ It's time to close the deal with the wingman ♪ 50 00:02:56,090 --> 00:02:57,130 ♪ Wingman ♪ 51 00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:59,760 - Turk Thompson. ♪ Wingman ♪ 52 00:02:59,840 --> 00:03:01,090 - Wingman. 53 00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:02,930 ♪ He's the wingman ♪ 54 00:03:03,010 --> 00:03:04,970 ♪ Wingman ♪ 55 00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:06,600 (wing smacks forehead) - Ah! 56 00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:07,850 ♪ Wingman ♪ 57 00:03:07,930 --> 00:03:13,150 (Turk groans and chatters) ♪ Wingman ♪ 58 00:03:14,900 --> 00:03:17,610 (upbeat music) 59 00:03:17,690 --> 00:03:18,610 - Nice face. 60 00:03:18,690 --> 00:03:21,450 (upbeat music) 61 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:24,200 Yeah. 62 00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:25,620 (upbeat music) 63 00:03:25,700 --> 00:03:27,950 (arm whooshes) 64 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:31,540 (sighs) 2100 hours exactly. 65 00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:36,840 Your, uh, wingman is now officially on the clock. 66 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:38,170 Tonight, I'm gonna get you laid 67 00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:41,090 faster than an olive-oil soaked butt plug 68 00:03:41,170 --> 00:03:44,300 bouncing down the side of Brokeback Mountain. 69 00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:47,010 (upbeat music) 70 00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:50,520 - So, how exactly does this work anyhow? 71 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:52,600 - You pick out the hottie you want, 72 00:03:52,690 --> 00:03:54,860 we stride on up there. 73 00:03:54,940 --> 00:03:56,520 And then, I build you up to the point 74 00:03:56,610 --> 00:03:57,650 that you're so irresistible, 75 00:03:57,730 --> 00:04:00,280 even a one-legged nun at a gopher hole festival 76 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:02,360 couldn't resist power-slamming you. 77 00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:03,360 (upbeat music) 78 00:04:03,450 --> 00:04:06,280 (arm whooshing) 79 00:04:07,370 --> 00:04:09,450 I'll take out the Klingon friend, 80 00:04:10,290 --> 00:04:11,870 then you're on your own. 81 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,540 (upbeat music) 82 00:04:14,620 --> 00:04:16,670 - How do I know it works? 83 00:04:16,750 --> 00:04:18,880 - Does an elephant know how to jerk itself off 84 00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:20,260 with its own nose? 85 00:04:20,340 --> 00:04:22,010 (upbeat music) 86 00:04:22,090 --> 00:04:23,050 - I, I. 87 00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:24,720 (upbeat music) 88 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:26,890 - Come on, let's go. 89 00:04:26,970 --> 00:04:32,180 (upbeat music) (people laughing) 90 00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:34,270 (brunette laughing) 91 00:04:34,350 --> 00:04:35,230 - Hello, ladies. 92 00:04:35,310 --> 00:04:36,900 (blonde gasps) 93 00:04:36,980 --> 00:04:38,190 Can we, uh, 94 00:04:39,610 --> 00:04:41,030 buy you some drinks? 95 00:04:41,110 --> 00:04:43,990 - I don't know. Can you afford a bottle of Cristal? 96 00:04:45,070 --> 00:04:45,860 - This is Todd Barker. 97 00:04:45,950 --> 00:04:48,700 5'9", 186 pounds, 98 00:04:48,780 --> 00:04:50,790 half Irish, two-thirds Italian, 99 00:04:50,870 --> 00:04:52,750 1% Native American, 100 00:04:52,830 --> 00:04:54,080 Navajo tribe. 101 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:55,330 Thanks for asking. 102 00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:57,790 He works at a successful law firm downtown, 103 00:04:57,880 --> 00:04:59,340 makes 49K a year, 104 00:04:59,420 --> 00:05:03,010 10-year trajectory, 600K, annually. 105 00:05:03,090 --> 00:05:05,470 Blood type O, no trace of disease 106 00:05:05,550 --> 00:05:07,340 or mental illness in his gene pool, 107 00:05:07,430 --> 00:05:10,260 although he does have a brother who once got arrested 108 00:05:10,350 --> 00:05:13,180 for shooting through an Arby's drive-through window. 109 00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:15,770 He's only been with three women. 110 00:05:15,850 --> 00:05:17,690 Almost had a homosexual encounter 111 00:05:17,770 --> 00:05:20,770 in a public restroom in Germany after he left college. 112 00:05:20,860 --> 00:05:22,320 He's allergic to cats. 113 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:23,530 He doesn't snore. 114 00:05:23,610 --> 00:05:25,950 He prefers steak over seafood. 115 00:05:26,030 --> 00:05:28,160 And he's been circumcised. 116 00:05:29,450 --> 00:05:30,870 Twice. 117 00:05:30,950 --> 00:05:31,990 - Twice. (chuckles nervously) 118 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:34,080 - Any, uh, questions? 119 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:36,460 - Excuse us for a second. 120 00:05:37,210 --> 00:05:38,290 - Are you fucking kidding me? 121 00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:40,170 How did you know all this stuff? 122 00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:42,460 - I'm good at my job. 123 00:05:42,550 --> 00:05:44,920 - Okay, looks like we'll take that drink after all. 124 00:05:45,010 --> 00:05:46,840 - I thought so. 125 00:05:47,090 --> 00:05:48,640 (upbeat music) 126 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,970 - Hi. (upbeat music) 127 00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:55,430 - (sniffs) What is that unbelievable smell? 128 00:05:55,520 --> 00:05:57,270 Are you wearing cologne? 129 00:05:57,350 --> 00:05:58,980 - It's just a little something I picked up 130 00:05:59,060 --> 00:06:00,560 when I was in Paris. 131 00:06:00,650 --> 00:06:03,900 Kindness, forgiveness, cherish, 132 00:06:03,980 --> 00:06:07,070 KFC, number seven. 133 00:06:07,820 --> 00:06:09,660 - You're fucking hot. 134 00:06:09,740 --> 00:06:10,490 - I know. 135 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:11,830 - Hey there, gorgeous. 136 00:06:13,080 --> 00:06:14,490 Do you work in a museum, 137 00:06:14,580 --> 00:06:15,910 because you're a work of art? 138 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,910 (upbeat music) 139 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:19,500 (air whooshes) (Skip gasps) 140 00:06:19,580 --> 00:06:20,920 - Ah, my face! 141 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:23,550 Ah! Ah! 142 00:06:23,630 --> 00:06:25,380 - Upstairs, there's literally, like, 143 00:06:25,460 --> 00:06:26,720 a flight piercing sound in the- 144 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:28,880 - Ugh! Ugh! - [Group] Whoa! 145 00:06:28,970 --> 00:06:30,010 Whoa! - Oh my god. 146 00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:30,840 - What is that? - Skip! 147 00:06:30,930 --> 00:06:32,680 I like the new look! 148 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:35,390 Girls are into narwhals these days, right? 149 00:06:35,470 --> 00:06:36,890 - You better not show up to our wedding like that. 150 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:38,230 You might steal my thunder. 151 00:06:38,310 --> 00:06:39,770 - [Friend] Yeah, and pop all the balloons. 152 00:06:39,850 --> 00:06:40,980 - Dude, come here, come here. - Just take it out, 153 00:06:41,060 --> 00:06:42,150 please, please. 154 00:06:42,230 --> 00:06:43,190 - [Terri] Oh! 155 00:06:43,270 --> 00:06:44,190 (Skip grunts) - [Group] Oh! 156 00:06:44,270 --> 00:06:45,820 - Am I pussing, am I pussing? 157 00:06:45,900 --> 00:06:47,820 - No, it doesn't look good. - All right. 158 00:06:47,900 --> 00:06:50,070 Okay, guys, guys, all right, a toast. 159 00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:53,330 To Bob and Terri and your last few days of being single. 160 00:06:53,410 --> 00:06:55,080 - Aw. - Okay, fine. 161 00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:56,450 Here's to Bob and Terri, 162 00:06:56,540 --> 00:06:58,410 the most obnoxiously cute couple I've ever met. 163 00:06:58,500 --> 00:06:59,660 - [Holly] Mhmm. - Thank you. 164 00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:02,540 - And here's to the world's best boss 165 00:07:02,630 --> 00:07:04,710 becoming the world's best husband. 166 00:07:04,790 --> 00:07:07,590 - Aw. - Okay, fine, my turn. 167 00:07:07,670 --> 00:07:10,720 Here's to the most amazing girlfriend in the world, 168 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:14,430 and come next week, the most amazing wife. 169 00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:17,930 Oh, most importantly, here's to closing the Alfab account! 170 00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:18,850 (friends cheering) Finally! 171 00:07:18,930 --> 00:07:19,930 (glasses clinking) 172 00:07:20,020 --> 00:07:21,440 - Yeah! (friends laughing) 173 00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:23,940 - Yeah! (everyone laughing) 174 00:07:24,020 --> 00:07:27,530 (gentle rhythmic music) 175 00:07:28,650 --> 00:07:29,690 - Hi. 176 00:07:29,780 --> 00:07:30,530 Hello. 177 00:07:30,610 --> 00:07:31,490 - [Terri] Hi. 178 00:07:31,570 --> 00:07:32,990 - My name is Kazzim. 179 00:07:33,660 --> 00:07:36,160 - Nice to meet you, Kazzim. 180 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:38,580 - Very beautiful woman. 181 00:07:38,660 --> 00:07:40,080 Your skin is very beautiful. 182 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,750 It's like the chocolate 183 00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:45,750 cascading down a Dairy Queen sundae. 184 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,920 No nuts, I hope, you know? (laughing) 185 00:07:49,010 --> 00:07:50,420 Day and age. (chuckles) 186 00:07:50,510 --> 00:07:51,970 These kids, nuts, no nuts. 187 00:07:52,050 --> 00:07:53,130 I have nuts, they have nuts. 188 00:07:53,220 --> 00:07:55,100 We all have nuts, everybody's nuts. 189 00:07:55,180 --> 00:07:56,680 (Terri laughs) 190 00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:57,640 - I don't think- 191 00:07:57,720 --> 00:08:00,310 - Can I get you boys some shots? 192 00:08:00,390 --> 00:08:01,730 - And staring in your eyes 193 00:08:01,810 --> 00:08:05,440 is like staring at the beautiful stars in the sky. 194 00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:06,520 - Wow. 195 00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:09,730 Okay. 196 00:08:09,820 --> 00:08:11,610 (friends laughing) 197 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:13,490 - Mm, these are good. 198 00:08:13,570 --> 00:08:14,610 Thank you, man. - Hey. 199 00:08:14,700 --> 00:08:16,570 - You know, one for my dead dog. 200 00:08:16,660 --> 00:08:18,080 - Yeah. 201 00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:20,870 (upbeat music) 202 00:08:22,750 --> 00:08:24,620 - And we will make babies. (Terri chuckles) 203 00:08:24,710 --> 00:08:28,210 We will have little Raju, Sangita. 204 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,510 (Terri chuckles) Rajinder. 205 00:08:31,590 --> 00:08:32,590 Sandeep. 206 00:08:33,510 --> 00:08:34,970 And don't forget Chandala. 207 00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:37,510 He's our crippled one. - Oh. 208 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,560 - You can't have all good ones. 209 00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:41,730 - Wow, that's... - I plan on breeding. 210 00:08:42,730 --> 00:08:45,020 I want to win the breeders cup. 211 00:08:45,100 --> 00:08:46,150 - That's, uh. 212 00:08:46,230 --> 00:08:48,570 - I like your little flower there. 213 00:08:48,650 --> 00:08:49,520 - Mhmm. 214 00:08:49,610 --> 00:08:50,610 - Mm! 215 00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,450 - I like your halitosis, shit breath. 216 00:08:53,530 --> 00:08:55,030 (both laughing) 217 00:08:55,110 --> 00:08:57,530 - Listen, I'm, I'm with someone, so. 218 00:08:58,740 --> 00:08:59,830 - That, that guy? 219 00:08:59,910 --> 00:09:02,830 - Right? (laughs) (friends laughing) 220 00:09:02,910 --> 00:09:03,960 (glass thuds) 221 00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:05,830 Ah! - That guy? 222 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,330 - Yeah, yeah, that guy. 223 00:09:08,420 --> 00:09:09,670 - Are you sure? 224 00:09:09,750 --> 00:09:11,500 Is that what you want for the rest of your life? 225 00:09:11,590 --> 00:09:13,630 (upbeat music) 226 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:16,630 I would love to have the opportunity to win your heart. 227 00:09:18,220 --> 00:09:19,970 Cheers. (glasses clinking) 228 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,060 Cohagala. 229 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:23,180 You know cohagala? 230 00:09:23,270 --> 00:09:25,350 - It's Coca-Cola. - Ah ha, I had it wrong. 231 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:26,390 - Yeah. 232 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,270 (upbeat music) 233 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:32,860 - Mission accomplished. 234 00:09:32,940 --> 00:09:35,570 Jumbo's in the parking lot eating chicken. 235 00:09:35,650 --> 00:09:37,450 (upbeat music) 236 00:09:37,530 --> 00:09:39,820 (Terri and Kazzim laughing) 237 00:09:39,910 --> 00:09:40,910 - Terri! 238 00:09:41,950 --> 00:09:43,240 Terri! - Still working 239 00:09:43,330 --> 00:09:44,500 with the bottom feeders, huh? 240 00:09:44,580 --> 00:09:48,040 (suspenseful western music) 241 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:49,250 It's okay, Turk. 242 00:09:50,210 --> 00:09:52,050 You're gonna hit the big league someday. 243 00:09:53,300 --> 00:09:55,880 - Suck a Shell station glory hole, Eddie. 244 00:09:55,970 --> 00:09:57,430 - What did your client bag ya, tonight? 245 00:09:57,510 --> 00:09:58,680 Five, 600? 246 00:10:00,680 --> 00:10:02,470 (Bob vomiting) 247 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,060 (Bob sighs) 248 00:10:04,140 --> 00:10:05,810 60K for that basket case. 249 00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:07,980 - [Bob] Terri? 250 00:10:08,060 --> 00:10:09,730 - His lady never stood a chance. 251 00:10:09,810 --> 00:10:11,150 Hooked her up with one of my high rollers 252 00:10:11,230 --> 00:10:12,610 in about 20 minutes. 253 00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:16,570 Yeah. 254 00:10:16,650 --> 00:10:18,360 And I'm the only wingman in town 255 00:10:18,450 --> 00:10:20,280 that comes with a guarantee. 256 00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:21,370 Why? 257 00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:23,580 Because I'm that good. 258 00:10:24,490 --> 00:10:26,700 I got a little something for you though. 259 00:10:26,790 --> 00:10:30,670 (suspenseful western music) 260 00:10:30,750 --> 00:10:31,750 - Terri! 261 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,170 Terri, where you are? 262 00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:37,300 I miss you. (sighs) 263 00:10:37,380 --> 00:10:39,720 (suspenseful western music) 264 00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,390 - We'll see about your guarantee. 265 00:10:42,510 --> 00:10:44,100 Asshole. 266 00:10:44,180 --> 00:10:45,010 (Turk sips drink) 267 00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:47,640 (gentle music) 268 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,940 - Terri? Is that you? (panting) 269 00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:57,240 - Terri's gone, kid. 270 00:10:58,530 --> 00:10:59,860 You want her back, 271 00:11:00,700 --> 00:11:01,950 you call me. 272 00:11:02,030 --> 00:11:04,660 You wanna forget about her and get some new tail, 273 00:11:05,700 --> 00:11:06,790 call me, too. 274 00:11:06,870 --> 00:11:08,790 (pen thuds) 275 00:11:08,870 --> 00:11:11,620 (Bob groaning) 276 00:11:13,710 --> 00:11:14,500 (phone ringing) 277 00:11:14,590 --> 00:11:15,960 - Got it, Ms. Cromwell, 278 00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:18,010 the Global Speedway presentation is coming along fine. 279 00:11:18,090 --> 00:11:19,970 - [Ms. Cromwell] The presentation has to be flawless. 280 00:11:20,050 --> 00:11:21,430 - Fast and full of energy. 281 00:11:21,510 --> 00:11:25,430 - This client is building first-class race car tracks 282 00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,220 across the globe. 283 00:11:27,310 --> 00:11:30,140 We have to win this bid. 284 00:11:30,230 --> 00:11:31,600 - Dimples. 285 00:11:31,690 --> 00:11:32,850 - [Ms. Cromwell] What was that? 286 00:11:32,940 --> 00:11:34,440 - (clears throat) Uh, simple. 287 00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,770 It'll be simple, piece of cake. 288 00:11:36,860 --> 00:11:38,320 - It better be. 289 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:40,990 Our future is in your hands, Bob. 290 00:11:41,070 --> 00:11:42,160 (notification beeps) - Ye- 291 00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:45,580 Oh. (clears throat) 292 00:11:45,660 --> 00:11:46,830 - Yo, Bobby! - Hey. 293 00:11:46,910 --> 00:11:48,120 - Bobby, boy! - Hey! 294 00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:50,660 - Time for happy hour at O'Grady's. 295 00:11:50,750 --> 00:11:51,620 - Hey, guys. 296 00:11:52,580 --> 00:11:53,920 Look at those dimples, huh? 297 00:11:56,540 --> 00:11:58,340 - Bob, it's been five months, dude. 298 00:11:58,420 --> 00:11:59,920 - Terri ain't coming back. 299 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:02,090 And if you ask me, 300 00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:03,510 better off now than if you guys got married. 301 00:12:03,590 --> 00:12:05,260 - (laughs) You'll see. 302 00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:06,350 She'll be back. 303 00:12:06,430 --> 00:12:08,180 We had something. 304 00:12:08,260 --> 00:12:09,430 - No, no, no. 305 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,020 Mr. Smooth Moves has something, all right. 306 00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:15,270 Race cars, a Fortune 500 company, style. 307 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,070 She's gone, Bob, move on. 308 00:12:17,150 --> 00:12:20,570 - Yeah, it's time for someone who's not so runaway bride. 309 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,530 - She's the only girl I've ever had. 310 00:12:22,610 --> 00:12:24,660 The only girl I've ever had sex with! 311 00:12:25,910 --> 00:12:27,780 - Jesus, we gotta get you laid. 312 00:12:27,870 --> 00:12:29,290 - All right, let's go, come on, buddy. 313 00:12:29,370 --> 00:12:32,000 - I got so much I gotta do. - Ah, it's time for shots! 314 00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:33,460 Let's go. Tequila. - Come on. 315 00:12:33,540 --> 00:12:34,540 - That can wait till tomorrow. - Tequila? 316 00:12:34,620 --> 00:12:35,710 - Yeah. - Okay. 317 00:12:35,790 --> 00:12:37,000 - There we go. - Yeah, I can use a drink. 318 00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:39,710 ♪ My story's like a sad, sad song ♪ 319 00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:41,090 ♪ Well, she was here ♪ - Tequila! 320 00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:42,720 ♪ But now she's gone ♪ 321 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:45,260 ♪ Gonna keep drinking till I forget ♪ 322 00:12:45,340 --> 00:12:48,390 ♪ So bartender, set 'em up again ♪ 323 00:12:48,470 --> 00:12:50,810 ♪ As long as her memory hangs around ♪ 324 00:12:50,890 --> 00:12:52,730 ♪ Just set 'em up and I'll break 'em down ♪ 325 00:12:52,810 --> 00:12:55,350 - Oh, remind me to stick to girly drinks from now on. 326 00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:57,150 Okay? - Come on, Holly. 327 00:12:57,230 --> 00:12:57,900 You can handle it. 328 00:12:57,980 --> 00:12:59,230 Besides, you know the rule. 329 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,610 Remember, hmm, if you wanna be my assistant, 330 00:13:01,690 --> 00:13:02,740 you have to? 331 00:13:02,820 --> 00:13:04,150 - [Friends] Keep up with the boys. 332 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,030 - Oh, okay, well, thanks. 333 00:13:06,110 --> 00:13:07,910 But I prefer men. - Ah. 334 00:13:07,990 --> 00:13:11,080 - So you boys just carry on. 335 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:13,200 - All right, well, let's get down to business. 336 00:13:13,290 --> 00:13:15,920 It's time to get Bob hooked up again. 337 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,040 - Come on, you guys. 338 00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:20,090 You, you gotta just let it happen. 339 00:13:21,590 --> 00:13:23,880 You can't manufacture love. 340 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:25,930 - It's true. 341 00:13:26,010 --> 00:13:27,220 Phil Collins said you can't hurry it either. 342 00:13:27,300 --> 00:13:28,930 - Yeah. (Holly scoffs) 343 00:13:29,010 --> 00:13:31,060 - Redhead incoming at four o'clock. 344 00:13:31,140 --> 00:13:33,020 - She's beautiful, but I'm good right now, man. 345 00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:35,690 - Come on. - Go introduce yourself, bro. 346 00:13:35,770 --> 00:13:37,350 - Oh, no, ah, right now? 347 00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:40,770 - Ah, come on, we're going. 348 00:13:40,860 --> 00:13:42,480 We're going, we're going, we're going. 349 00:13:42,570 --> 00:13:43,780 - All right, all right. - That a boy. 350 00:13:43,860 --> 00:13:48,410 - Have fun. - I believe in you. (laughing) 351 00:13:48,490 --> 00:13:51,620 - I believe in you. - Thank you. 352 00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:52,580 Howdy! 353 00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:54,950 That was stupid, ah. 354 00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:56,120 You know, I just wanted to, 355 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:57,830 you know, I saw you from my friends 356 00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:59,790 and I just wanted to say hello. 357 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,880 - Look, I'm just, I'm really not in the mood, okay? 358 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:04,130 - Okay, sure. 359 00:14:04,210 --> 00:14:06,840 She's not in the mood. - Be charming. Be funny. 360 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:08,550 - Be funny? - Yes. 361 00:14:09,590 --> 00:14:10,800 - Come on, it's called happy hour, 362 00:14:10,890 --> 00:14:12,600 not depressed hour. (laughs) 363 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:15,140 - Look, this is just a really bad time, okay? 364 00:14:16,100 --> 00:14:19,850 - Come on, it's not like somebody died! (laughs) 365 00:14:19,940 --> 00:14:20,940 Did they? 366 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:23,650 (drink splashes) 367 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:26,740 (people laughing) 368 00:14:27,950 --> 00:14:29,200 - [Skip] It's all right, man. 369 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:31,490 ♪ Just jack 'em up and I'll break 'em down ♪ 370 00:14:31,570 --> 00:14:33,660 - Yeah. - Nice. 371 00:14:33,740 --> 00:14:35,160 - Wow. (Holly chuckles) 372 00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:38,620 That went well, I see. - So you think she's the one? 373 00:14:39,750 --> 00:14:40,830 - There's a possibility, I think. 374 00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:43,170 (friends laugh) 375 00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:48,420 ♪ Well, I wonder what to do ♪ 376 00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:51,050 ♪ As I sit and stare at you ♪ 377 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:52,640 - Well, it looks like, 378 00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,350 (exhales) 379 00:14:55,810 --> 00:14:58,390 looks like it came out pretty clean. 380 00:14:58,810 --> 00:14:59,810 Sorta. 381 00:15:00,850 --> 00:15:03,520 - Hey, thanks for dropping me off, Holly. 382 00:15:03,610 --> 00:15:05,190 Sorry I've been out of my mind. 383 00:15:05,270 --> 00:15:07,360 It's just, you know. 384 00:15:07,940 --> 00:15:09,490 - Yeah, I know. 385 00:15:10,860 --> 00:15:14,450 Oh, um, this bizarre pen in your shirt pocket, 386 00:15:14,530 --> 00:15:15,540 I almost washed it. 387 00:15:15,620 --> 00:15:16,410 It's, um. 388 00:15:16,490 --> 00:15:17,700 - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. 389 00:15:17,790 --> 00:15:19,870 No, I've been holding on to that for months. 390 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,210 - "Get laid." 391 00:15:21,290 --> 00:15:22,420 - The guy that gave it to me 392 00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:23,960 said he could help me get Terri back. 393 00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:26,670 He was there at the bar the night she dumped me. 394 00:15:26,750 --> 00:15:28,550 But I don't, it's so stupid. 395 00:15:28,630 --> 00:15:33,800 - Oh, wait, but you're not actually considering this, 396 00:15:33,890 --> 00:15:35,680 are you? - No! 397 00:15:36,140 --> 00:15:37,680 (scoffs) No. 398 00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:39,600 - Okay, 'cause like a wingman? 399 00:15:39,680 --> 00:15:42,190 (chuckles) What? Are you still in high school? 400 00:15:42,270 --> 00:15:43,060 - I'll get rid of it. - Okay. 401 00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:44,730 - Just, yeah. - Okay. 402 00:15:44,810 --> 00:15:48,570 And not to be your mother, but come on, Bob. 403 00:15:48,650 --> 00:15:51,150 Your place is a disaster area. 404 00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:52,240 Like, look at this. 405 00:15:52,320 --> 00:15:55,120 I found rat turds in the kitchen. 406 00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:56,450 That's disgusting. 407 00:15:56,530 --> 00:15:58,410 - Terri's the one, Holly. 408 00:15:58,490 --> 00:15:59,580 I'm telling you, she's just going through 409 00:15:59,660 --> 00:16:00,540 some stuff right now. 410 00:16:00,620 --> 00:16:01,620 She's gonna, 411 00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:04,880 she'll be back. (gentle music) 412 00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:06,380 (Holly sighs) 413 00:16:06,460 --> 00:16:08,250 (glasses clattering) 414 00:16:08,340 --> 00:16:09,510 My place is falling apart. 415 00:16:09,590 --> 00:16:10,420 It's okay. 416 00:16:10,510 --> 00:16:11,880 (gentle music) 417 00:16:11,970 --> 00:16:13,010 - You know, Bob, 418 00:16:14,180 --> 00:16:16,640 sooner or later you're gonna have to move on. 419 00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:19,430 There are other good people out there in the world. 420 00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:22,060 You just gotta go looking. - No. 421 00:16:22,140 --> 00:16:23,440 No. No. 422 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:25,060 See, I think you saw tonight, 423 00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:26,860 I don't know how to move on. 424 00:16:27,770 --> 00:16:29,530 I'll get Terri back, you'll see. 425 00:16:29,610 --> 00:16:30,780 Mark my words. 426 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:34,320 - Why would you even want her? 427 00:16:35,490 --> 00:16:37,370 (Holly sighs) 428 00:16:37,450 --> 00:16:38,530 - What did you say? 429 00:16:39,830 --> 00:16:41,790 - Uh, goodnight, Bob. 430 00:16:41,870 --> 00:16:43,660 - Oh, yeah. Goodnight. 431 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,960 - Yeah. - Oh, and Holly. 432 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:48,040 - Yep? 433 00:16:49,250 --> 00:16:52,420 - Say "Hi" to Tim for me. ♪ Crying eyes just for you ♪ 434 00:16:52,510 --> 00:16:53,630 - Yeah. 435 00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:54,720 Sure, Bob. 436 00:16:55,550 --> 00:16:57,640 I'll tell him, "Hello." 437 00:16:57,720 --> 00:17:01,140 (heels clacking) 438 00:17:01,220 --> 00:17:04,480 ♪ Still got crying eyes for you ♪ 439 00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:07,440 ♪ Still got crying eyes for you ♪ 440 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:09,650 ♪ 'Cause I've got crying eyes for you ♪ 441 00:17:09,730 --> 00:17:10,730 - Wingman. 442 00:17:12,070 --> 00:17:13,860 What have I got to lose? 443 00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:17,030 ♪ Still got crying eyes for you ♪ 444 00:17:17,110 --> 00:17:21,490 ♪ Still got crying eyes for you ♪ 445 00:17:21,580 --> 00:17:24,710 (vehicles whirring) 446 00:17:24,790 --> 00:17:27,960 ♪ Sh-doop, sh-doo ♪ 447 00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:31,170 ♪ Sh-doop, sh-doo ♪ 448 00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:34,010 ♪ Sh-doop, sh-doo ♪ 449 00:17:34,090 --> 00:17:36,010 ♪ Oh ♪ 450 00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:38,680 (pickle whooshing) 451 00:17:38,760 --> 00:17:41,010 (pickle smacks) - Ow! 452 00:17:41,100 --> 00:17:43,560 - Hey, Numbfuck! - What the? 453 00:17:44,810 --> 00:17:45,980 - Over here. 454 00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:48,650 - Ah. 455 00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:51,190 Was that really necessary? 456 00:17:51,270 --> 00:17:53,030 - How you doing, partner? 457 00:17:53,110 --> 00:17:54,690 Turk Thompson. 458 00:17:54,780 --> 00:17:55,820 Wingman. - Hey. 459 00:17:56,740 --> 00:17:58,660 Bob Erdman, junior executive at the- 460 00:17:58,740 --> 00:18:00,780 - Yeah, yeah, I know who you are. 461 00:18:00,870 --> 00:18:03,160 - You do? - Drink up. 462 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:04,580 Got ya a Coke. 463 00:18:05,790 --> 00:18:07,750 - Oh, that's awfully kind of you, thank you. (laughs) 464 00:18:07,830 --> 00:18:10,710 - Now, how many, uh, 465 00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:12,040 women you've been with? 466 00:18:12,130 --> 00:18:13,090 (Bob scoffs) 467 00:18:13,170 --> 00:18:14,630 - (swallows) One. 468 00:18:14,710 --> 00:18:17,470 (Turk gagging) 469 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,220 - Are you cereal? 470 00:18:23,310 --> 00:18:25,560 - Yeah, but I mean, she was the love of my life. 471 00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:26,560 And a few months ago- 472 00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:28,140 - Oh, yeah. I saw. 473 00:18:28,230 --> 00:18:30,270 And as much as I despise Eddie, 474 00:18:30,350 --> 00:18:32,570 he ran the old shot and shitter perfectly. 475 00:18:32,650 --> 00:18:35,740 Ha, works every time. 476 00:18:35,820 --> 00:18:37,400 - Shot and shitter? I don't understand. 477 00:18:37,490 --> 00:18:40,280 - Yeah, he was buying you shots all night, right? 478 00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:42,450 You were just pounding them down. 479 00:18:42,530 --> 00:18:44,910 And when you're in the shitter puking your guts out, 480 00:18:44,990 --> 00:18:48,000 his client is walking away with your girl. 481 00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:49,420 - Oh my god! 482 00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:50,710 That's exactly what happened. 483 00:18:50,790 --> 00:18:53,210 That's, how did I not? 484 00:18:53,290 --> 00:18:55,420 Am I that stupid? 485 00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:57,590 - Love makes you stupid, kid. 486 00:18:57,670 --> 00:18:59,880 You, uh, sure you want her back again? 487 00:18:59,970 --> 00:19:02,050 ♪ Dreams come true ♪ 488 00:19:02,140 --> 00:19:05,010 ♪ Sh-doop, sh-doo ♪ 489 00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:06,600 - Thanks, baby lumps. 490 00:19:07,390 --> 00:19:08,270 (waitress giggles) 491 00:19:08,350 --> 00:19:09,440 Leave it to me. 492 00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:10,980 We'll get your fiance back. 493 00:19:11,060 --> 00:19:13,230 - Okay, you know what? 494 00:19:13,310 --> 00:19:14,150 I'm in. 495 00:19:14,230 --> 00:19:16,280 I'll drink to that. (laughs) 496 00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:17,740 - First things first. 497 00:19:17,820 --> 00:19:18,780 How big's your cock? 498 00:19:18,860 --> 00:19:20,610 (Bob spits) 499 00:19:20,700 --> 00:19:22,110 The size of a man's hot dog 500 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:25,950 tells me just about everything I need to know about him. 501 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:27,040 - Hot dog? 502 00:19:28,290 --> 00:19:31,620 - Look, I don't do business with guys with small cocks. 503 00:19:31,710 --> 00:19:33,170 They're too angry. 504 00:19:33,250 --> 00:19:35,090 Now, guys that are too big, on the other hand, 505 00:19:35,170 --> 00:19:37,590 think they know more than me and they don't listen. 506 00:19:37,670 --> 00:19:39,840 And that's when things go wrong! 507 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:42,390 (Bob gags) 508 00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:48,310 - I mean, it makes sense. (coughs) 509 00:19:48,390 --> 00:19:50,770 - Here's what I need you to do, Broccoli Teeth. 510 00:19:50,850 --> 00:19:54,060 I need you to take these onion rings down into the john. 511 00:19:54,150 --> 00:19:56,400 Stack them on the bald cyclops, 512 00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:58,320 and let me know the count. 513 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,070 - The count? Are you fucking nuts, man? 514 00:20:01,150 --> 00:20:03,490 - Okay, been nice meeting you, kid. 515 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,570 Good luck with everything. 516 00:20:05,660 --> 00:20:07,280 - Oh, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 517 00:20:07,370 --> 00:20:08,490 Just sit down. 518 00:20:08,580 --> 00:20:11,580 Just... 519 00:20:11,660 --> 00:20:13,500 Look, what do you need me to do? 520 00:20:13,580 --> 00:20:15,670 - Stack 'em on Mushroom Mountain. 521 00:20:16,590 --> 00:20:18,210 14 is too many, 522 00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:20,720 and under three is a deal breaker. 523 00:20:21,630 --> 00:20:25,010 - I can't just stack onion rings on my, 524 00:20:26,050 --> 00:20:28,010 my cock, man. 525 00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:30,020 Besides, I'm not even. 526 00:20:30,100 --> 00:20:31,100 - What? 527 00:20:32,020 --> 00:20:33,520 - Hard. 528 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:37,020 - You, uh, sure about that, Charlie Candy Cane? 529 00:20:37,110 --> 00:20:38,270 - Am I sure? 530 00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:39,820 I think I would know if I have a boner! 531 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:42,030 Oh! 532 00:20:43,110 --> 00:20:44,200 - Viagra. 533 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:46,030 I put three of them in your Coke. 534 00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:48,330 I like to get the, uh, technical stuff 535 00:20:48,410 --> 00:20:50,540 out of the way right at the top. 536 00:20:50,620 --> 00:20:52,040 - You're nuts! You're a madman! 537 00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:54,040 This is a huge mistake! 538 00:20:54,120 --> 00:20:56,080 - Calm down, Space Ranger. 539 00:20:56,170 --> 00:20:58,840 We are gonna get your fiance back. 540 00:20:59,670 --> 00:21:01,130 Now, stack 'em! 541 00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:13,480 (faucet water hissing) (tense music) 542 00:21:14,060 --> 00:21:15,980 (door squeaking) 543 00:21:16,060 --> 00:21:17,150 (door thuds) 544 00:21:17,230 --> 00:21:18,520 (faucet water hissing) (tense music) 545 00:21:18,610 --> 00:21:20,020 (belt buckle jingling) 546 00:21:20,110 --> 00:21:21,780 (zipper whizzes) 547 00:21:21,860 --> 00:21:22,940 (pants flopping onto floor) 548 00:21:23,030 --> 00:21:24,280 (faucet water hissing) (tense music) 549 00:21:24,360 --> 00:21:26,860 (Bob sighs) 550 00:21:28,820 --> 00:21:30,330 - What the hell am I doing? 551 00:21:30,410 --> 00:21:33,120 (suspenseful music) 552 00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:35,330 (exhales) Okay. 553 00:21:35,410 --> 00:21:36,710 Come on, Bob. 554 00:21:36,790 --> 00:21:37,540 (onion ring hisses) 555 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:38,630 Oh! 556 00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:44,760 (Bob heavily breaths) 557 00:21:44,840 --> 00:21:46,300 - Pervert! (Bob screams) 558 00:21:46,380 --> 00:21:47,430 - Asshole. 559 00:21:47,510 --> 00:21:49,760 Should've let 'em cool off first. 560 00:21:49,850 --> 00:21:51,390 (Bob screaming) 561 00:21:51,470 --> 00:21:54,270 (Bob shrieking) 562 00:21:54,350 --> 00:21:55,270 - [Bob] Oh! 563 00:21:56,730 --> 00:21:58,560 God! 564 00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:01,070 ♪ I got a greasy ring of fire ♪ 565 00:22:01,150 --> 00:22:03,440 ♪ And it's flaming in my pants ♪ 566 00:22:03,530 --> 00:22:05,150 ♪ It stings and it burns ♪ 567 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:07,570 ♪ Like a nest of army ants ♪ 568 00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:09,950 - Eight. - Ha, not bad. 569 00:22:10,030 --> 00:22:14,040 Looks like we, uh, we got ourselves a deal. 570 00:22:14,120 --> 00:22:15,250 - Do you think we can maybe stop 571 00:22:15,330 --> 00:22:17,830 and, like, get some ice or something? 572 00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:20,920 - Only thing that's gonna work for that is Slurpee anal. 573 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:23,920 - Slurpee anal? 574 00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:24,760 - Yeah. 575 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:27,420 Large Slurpee, lid, 576 00:22:27,510 --> 00:22:29,050 flip it upside down. 577 00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:30,930 (knife flicks) 578 00:22:31,010 --> 00:22:34,810 Cut in an asshole, put it back on your lap. 579 00:22:34,890 --> 00:22:38,810 And stuff it like a taxidermist stuffing a dead bobcat. 580 00:22:40,060 --> 00:22:43,070 - (scoffs) Yeah, like that's gonna happen. 581 00:22:43,900 --> 00:22:45,940 (tires squealing) 582 00:22:46,030 --> 00:22:47,570 ♪ Don't go fall in love ♪ 583 00:22:47,650 --> 00:22:49,490 ♪ If you can't take the heat ♪ 584 00:22:49,570 --> 00:22:51,870 ♪ I got a greasy ring of fire ♪ 585 00:22:51,950 --> 00:22:54,160 ♪ And it's burning so damn hot ♪ 586 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:56,200 ♪ I thank the Lord above ♪ 587 00:22:56,290 --> 00:22:58,000 ♪ That I don't gotta squat ♪ 588 00:22:58,080 --> 00:23:00,000 (Turk sniffs) (Bob's voice quivers) 589 00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:01,250 - What is that? 590 00:23:01,330 --> 00:23:03,500 Is that Raspberry Sunblast? 591 00:23:03,590 --> 00:23:05,340 - Uh, no, this is Goofy Grape. 592 00:23:05,420 --> 00:23:07,300 - Oh, that's gonna stain. 593 00:23:07,380 --> 00:23:08,300 - What? - Yeah. 594 00:23:08,380 --> 00:23:10,180 You're gonna have Smurf cock. 595 00:23:10,260 --> 00:23:12,340 - Smurf cock? Jesus Christ! 596 00:23:12,430 --> 00:23:15,430 Look, maybe this whole thing was just a bad idea. 597 00:23:16,180 --> 00:23:17,770 - Listen, Forehead Face. 598 00:23:17,850 --> 00:23:21,900 I take my job very seriously and I ain't lost a client yet. 599 00:23:23,020 --> 00:23:24,730 We are gonna get you laid, 600 00:23:24,820 --> 00:23:27,110 and then we're gonna get your fiance back. 601 00:23:28,150 --> 00:23:29,860 - What if she doesn't want me back? What if- 602 00:23:29,950 --> 00:23:33,530 (care engine revving) (car horn honks a lively tune) 603 00:23:33,620 --> 00:23:36,120 - She will want you back! 604 00:23:37,120 --> 00:23:40,460 One grand up front and the rest when we finish. 605 00:23:42,710 --> 00:23:43,960 - Deal. Deal. 606 00:23:46,460 --> 00:23:50,510 (car engine revving) (tires squealing) 607 00:23:50,590 --> 00:23:52,300 I gotta say, Turk. 608 00:23:52,380 --> 00:23:54,550 This car's a bit of a throwback. 609 00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:56,930 You don't see these around much anymore. 610 00:23:57,010 --> 00:23:59,180 - That's 'cause most people can't handle 'em. 611 00:23:59,270 --> 00:24:01,480 Only someone who understands speed 612 00:24:01,560 --> 00:24:03,690 can drive the orgasm-mobile. 613 00:24:04,980 --> 00:24:06,520 - Orgasm-mobile? 614 00:24:06,610 --> 00:24:11,570 - Yep, and that's her G-spot right there. (laughing) 615 00:24:12,950 --> 00:24:14,530 You touch her just right. 616 00:24:14,620 --> 00:24:16,660 Whisper sweet nothings in her ear. 617 00:24:17,910 --> 00:24:21,830 And there ain't a car alive that can catch her! (laughing) 618 00:24:21,910 --> 00:24:23,330 Oh, what's that, baby, hm? 619 00:24:23,420 --> 00:24:25,380 Oh, mm, oh yeah. 620 00:24:25,460 --> 00:24:26,710 Mm, Daddy hears ya. 621 00:24:26,790 --> 00:24:28,130 (button squeaking) Mmm. 622 00:24:28,210 --> 00:24:31,010 Like a bit of that Cajun blackened catfish, 623 00:24:31,090 --> 00:24:32,260 Honey Child? 624 00:24:32,340 --> 00:24:35,430 Oh, Daddy gon touch you tonight, Baby Love. 625 00:24:35,510 --> 00:24:37,760 Mm, oh, yeah. (button squeaking) 626 00:24:37,850 --> 00:24:39,810 Oh, baby. (fingers tapping) 627 00:24:39,890 --> 00:24:41,980 (Turk groaning) 628 00:24:42,060 --> 00:24:43,690 - Turk, Turk, but... - Shut up! 629 00:24:43,770 --> 00:24:46,900 Ee, I'm in the middle of cunnilingus! 630 00:24:46,980 --> 00:24:50,440 That's right, oh, oh, like a piece of bubble gum 631 00:24:50,530 --> 00:24:52,110 under a school boy's desk. 632 00:24:52,190 --> 00:24:53,200 Mmm. 633 00:24:53,950 --> 00:24:55,200 Mm, Baby Love. 634 00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:58,780 Mm, Daddy got the Cajun catfish finger, Baby Love. 635 00:24:58,870 --> 00:25:01,790 - That's, look, Turk. - Yeah, shut up. 636 00:25:01,870 --> 00:25:05,330 Mm. (groaning) 637 00:25:05,420 --> 00:25:06,630 Oh. 638 00:25:06,710 --> 00:25:08,290 (Turk moaning) 639 00:25:08,380 --> 00:25:09,840 Little Puffy Puff. 640 00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:12,300 - Turk, Turk, listen. - Puffy, Puffy, Puffy Puff. 641 00:25:12,380 --> 00:25:13,130 (Turk moaning) 642 00:25:13,220 --> 00:25:14,470 - Turk, Turk, listen! 643 00:25:14,550 --> 00:25:16,140 I'm already late for a meeting! 644 00:25:16,220 --> 00:25:17,890 - Late? - Yeah. 645 00:25:17,970 --> 00:25:19,600 - Are you fucking cereal? 646 00:25:19,680 --> 00:25:21,470 A wingman's never late! 647 00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:24,310 Hold on, Onion Rings! 648 00:25:24,390 --> 00:25:25,520 (mechanism whirs) - Whoa! 649 00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:26,770 - Ah! 650 00:25:26,850 --> 00:25:28,440 (tires squealing) (Turk laughing) 651 00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:29,310 (upbeat music) 652 00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:30,440 - Oh! (Turk laughing) 653 00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:31,780 (car horn honks a lively tune) 654 00:25:31,860 --> 00:25:32,610 (upbeat music) 655 00:25:32,690 --> 00:25:35,320 (tires squealing) 656 00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:37,990 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 657 00:25:38,070 --> 00:25:40,700 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 658 00:25:40,780 --> 00:25:42,700 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 659 00:25:42,790 --> 00:25:45,960 (Turk laughing) ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ 660 00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:48,830 ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪ - Ah! 661 00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:49,840 (tires squealing) 662 00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:51,130 (Turk yells) (upbeat music) 663 00:25:51,210 --> 00:25:53,010 (Bob panting) (upbeat music) 664 00:25:53,090 --> 00:25:56,180 Oh! (upbeat music) 665 00:25:56,260 --> 00:25:59,640 (upbeat music ending) 666 00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:04,020 How in the hell did you do that? (panting) 667 00:26:04,100 --> 00:26:06,440 - I make my own special fuel, kid. 668 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:09,690 Yeah, even installed an extra tank. 669 00:26:09,770 --> 00:26:12,860 This shit's stronger than nitrous oxide, 670 00:26:12,940 --> 00:26:15,690 but it only lasts about as long as a human orgasm 671 00:26:15,780 --> 00:26:19,660 so you can only use it in real emergencies. 672 00:26:19,740 --> 00:26:21,740 - You make your own gasoline? 673 00:26:21,830 --> 00:26:24,450 So what, now you're an expert in women and cars? 674 00:26:25,450 --> 00:26:27,710 - Well, they're pretty much the same thing. 675 00:26:27,790 --> 00:26:29,370 Keep 'em lubed, you, 676 00:26:29,460 --> 00:26:30,540 you ride 'em fast, 677 00:26:30,630 --> 00:26:32,000 and you trade 'em in 678 00:26:32,090 --> 00:26:35,130 before there's too many cracks in the upholstery. 679 00:26:36,510 --> 00:26:39,800 You, uh, you better get to work, kid. 680 00:26:39,890 --> 00:26:43,350 - Yeah. (swanky music) 681 00:26:43,430 --> 00:26:45,390 (Bob groaning) 682 00:26:45,470 --> 00:26:47,600 (car door thuds) 683 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:48,440 (car engine cranks) 684 00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:51,860 (car engine rumbling) 685 00:26:55,030 --> 00:26:57,530 It was crazy, man, you wouldn't believe it. 686 00:26:57,610 --> 00:26:58,900 - You gotta hire him, bro. 687 00:26:58,990 --> 00:27:00,660 You got nothing to lose. 688 00:27:00,740 --> 00:27:03,410 - This guy's more of a wing nut than a wingman. 689 00:27:03,490 --> 00:27:05,330 - Look, if you want Terri back and he can help, 690 00:27:05,410 --> 00:27:07,580 then who cares, right? 691 00:27:07,660 --> 00:27:09,460 - I guess. - I'll research him. 692 00:27:09,540 --> 00:27:10,670 I'll Google his ass big time 693 00:27:10,750 --> 00:27:12,460 until I know everything about him. 694 00:27:12,540 --> 00:27:13,420 - You're the man, Skip. 695 00:27:13,500 --> 00:27:16,210 (gentle music) 696 00:27:16,300 --> 00:27:17,300 (phone rings) 697 00:27:17,380 --> 00:27:20,010 (call ringing) (birds squawking) 698 00:27:20,090 --> 00:27:21,430 - This is Bob. 699 00:27:21,510 --> 00:27:25,600 - Tonight, eight o'clock at the Grand. 700 00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:28,390 Nice shirt and tie, Choir Boy. 701 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:30,390 What'd you do, rob a trailer park? 702 00:27:30,480 --> 00:27:33,150 (tense music) 703 00:27:36,530 --> 00:27:38,280 (blinds sliding) 704 00:27:38,360 --> 00:27:40,450 I still see you. (blinds sliding) 705 00:27:40,530 --> 00:27:42,320 Coffee stains. (blinds sliding) 706 00:27:42,410 --> 00:27:46,290 Fly's open. (blinds thudding) 707 00:27:46,370 --> 00:27:48,000 (zipper whizzes) 708 00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:51,420 (sighs) Sweet freckled lasagna. 709 00:27:53,920 --> 00:27:55,290 - Hmm? 710 00:27:55,380 --> 00:27:57,550 I like a pop of red, but I don't know with this outfit. 711 00:27:57,630 --> 00:28:00,300 Maybe it's this one? 712 00:28:00,380 --> 00:28:02,470 - Uh, yeah, I don't know, I trust you. 713 00:28:02,550 --> 00:28:05,220 I always let Terri pick up my clothes for me, so. 714 00:28:06,310 --> 00:28:08,220 - And why is that? 715 00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:11,310 - Well, you're my assistant. 716 00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:12,690 You know how busy I am. 717 00:28:12,770 --> 00:28:14,980 I feel like shopping's just this big time waster. 718 00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:20,740 - Sometimes the time wasters are the most important things 719 00:28:20,820 --> 00:28:22,280 in a relationship, Bob. 720 00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:24,660 - Oh, so you're telling me 721 00:28:24,740 --> 00:28:26,870 if I had helped her pick out the candles for our wedding, 722 00:28:26,950 --> 00:28:29,120 then maybe she would've stayed, hmm. 723 00:28:30,790 --> 00:28:32,120 - You'd be surprised. 724 00:28:35,460 --> 00:28:37,040 It's the little things, Bob. 725 00:28:38,420 --> 00:28:39,800 The special things. 726 00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:43,470 (gentle music) 727 00:28:43,550 --> 00:28:46,720 ♪ It's such a mystery ♪ 728 00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:48,850 - Yeah, we had special things. 729 00:28:48,930 --> 00:28:50,770 We like had, 730 00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:55,600 in the mornings, 731 00:28:55,690 --> 00:28:57,560 I used to, uh, call her my morning bird 732 00:28:57,650 --> 00:29:00,070 and I would whistle sweet nothings into her ear, 733 00:29:00,150 --> 00:29:01,570 a little something like... 734 00:29:01,650 --> 00:29:03,820 (whistles like a songbird) 735 00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:13,160 (Bob continues whistling like a songbird) 736 00:29:13,250 --> 00:29:15,420 - Caw! Caw! 737 00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:18,920 - I used to do crow calls as a little girl, so. 738 00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:20,550 - I love that. - Mhmm. 739 00:29:21,210 --> 00:29:22,590 - I didn't know that. 740 00:29:26,260 --> 00:29:27,840 Holy shit, it's Terri. 741 00:29:29,510 --> 00:29:32,310 (gentle music) 742 00:29:33,350 --> 00:29:34,270 - Passion! 743 00:29:34,350 --> 00:29:35,350 - Ooh. 744 00:29:36,190 --> 00:29:37,270 Obsession! 745 00:29:37,350 --> 00:29:39,270 - Mm, a squirter. 746 00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:40,110 - Mm. 747 00:29:40,190 --> 00:29:41,360 - That's him. 748 00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:42,730 That's the guy that stole Terri from me. 749 00:29:42,820 --> 00:29:44,650 - Poison. - Seduction. 750 00:29:44,740 --> 00:29:46,070 - Ooh! 751 00:29:46,150 --> 00:29:47,360 J-Lo. - Oh. 752 00:29:47,450 --> 00:29:48,530 O.J. 753 00:29:48,620 --> 00:29:49,990 - Mmm. 754 00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:51,330 - Killer, it smells killer. 755 00:29:51,410 --> 00:29:52,660 - Oh, look what they're wearing. 756 00:29:52,740 --> 00:29:53,500 They're matching. 757 00:29:53,580 --> 00:29:55,540 (both humming) 758 00:29:55,620 --> 00:29:56,830 - Yeah, it's almost like 759 00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:58,880 they might have gone shopping together 760 00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:01,000 or, as you would say, a time-waster. 761 00:30:01,090 --> 00:30:02,590 - Mm. 762 00:30:02,670 --> 00:30:03,670 Ooh! 763 00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:06,430 Come to Me. - Ooh. 764 00:30:06,510 --> 00:30:08,470 - Does that smell like come to you? 765 00:30:08,550 --> 00:30:10,760 - Ooh, yes. 766 00:30:10,850 --> 00:30:12,260 (bell dings) 767 00:30:12,350 --> 00:30:13,720 - Give me all your Come. 768 00:30:13,810 --> 00:30:15,770 I need you to come to me so I can get the Come to Me, 769 00:30:15,850 --> 00:30:18,020 and we can go once we get all the Come. 770 00:30:18,100 --> 00:30:19,150 I'll be right back, darling. 771 00:30:19,230 --> 00:30:20,690 - Okay! - Can you gift wrap the Come? 772 00:30:20,770 --> 00:30:22,610 - Oh, he's leaving, he's leaving. 773 00:30:22,690 --> 00:30:23,780 - Shouldn't... - I gotta go. 774 00:30:23,860 --> 00:30:25,940 Shh, Holly! - Shouldn't, oh my god. 775 00:30:26,030 --> 00:30:29,160 (gentle suspenseful music) 776 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:30,120 (perfume thuds) 777 00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:32,120 - So you left me for this clown? 778 00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:33,450 - Bob, what are you doing here? 779 00:30:33,540 --> 00:30:34,830 - I can't believe you, Terri. 780 00:30:34,910 --> 00:30:36,250 You're gonna walk away from a good thing 781 00:30:36,330 --> 00:30:37,580 for a guy that likes perfume? 782 00:30:37,660 --> 00:30:39,000 What are you doing? 783 00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:40,330 - This isn't the time. 784 00:30:40,420 --> 00:30:43,300 (perfume box thuds) 785 00:30:43,380 --> 00:30:44,840 - Oh, now's not the time? 786 00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:46,760 But walking out on our wedding a week before it happens, 787 00:30:46,840 --> 00:30:47,760 that's the time? 788 00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:49,050 Is that how you like to do it? 789 00:30:49,130 --> 00:30:50,050 - You know, I didn't just walk out, Bob. 790 00:30:50,140 --> 00:30:51,800 It was a long-time coming. 791 00:30:51,890 --> 00:30:54,890 (perfume box thuds) 792 00:30:56,980 --> 00:30:57,890 - What do you mean a long time coming? 793 00:30:57,980 --> 00:30:58,980 We were happy! 794 00:30:59,060 --> 00:31:00,310 - Really? - Yeah! 795 00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:01,440 You weren't? 796 00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:02,690 You weren't... - No. 797 00:31:02,770 --> 00:31:04,110 - Well, I had no idea you were unhappy! 798 00:31:04,190 --> 00:31:05,190 - Exactly. 799 00:31:05,980 --> 00:31:06,990 - But you're my morning bird. 800 00:31:07,070 --> 00:31:07,990 Remember? 801 00:31:08,070 --> 00:31:12,240 (Bob whistling like a songbird) 802 00:31:13,740 --> 00:31:15,160 - I have to go. 803 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:16,620 (perfume box thuds) 804 00:31:16,700 --> 00:31:18,460 - Well, okay, then I have to go, too. 805 00:31:18,540 --> 00:31:21,330 You know, you're not the only one with hookups, okay? 806 00:31:21,420 --> 00:31:22,670 I got a lot of girls. 807 00:31:22,750 --> 00:31:24,920 So many girls, I had to ice my dick the other day. 808 00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:28,130 And your man's not the only one that can grab a perfume. 809 00:31:28,220 --> 00:31:30,630 Ooh, Come to Me by Ron Jeremy. 810 00:31:30,720 --> 00:31:31,840 It's so hard. 811 00:31:31,930 --> 00:31:32,680 Look, oh. (perfume hisses) 812 00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:34,010 (Bob yells) 813 00:31:34,100 --> 00:31:35,180 Ah, I got Come in my eyes! - I've heard enough. 814 00:31:35,260 --> 00:31:37,810 - There's Come! Ugh! - (sighs) Bob. 815 00:31:37,890 --> 00:31:39,560 - Terri, listen, okay? 816 00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:41,100 It's the little things, you know. 817 00:31:41,190 --> 00:31:42,270 - It's the... - Hey. 818 00:31:42,350 --> 00:31:43,360 - Oh. - Yeah, not Terri. 819 00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:45,610 - Mhmm. - Let's put this back. 820 00:31:47,570 --> 00:31:48,650 Love stinks, Bob. 821 00:31:49,780 --> 00:31:50,570 Sorry! 822 00:31:50,650 --> 00:31:52,740 (upbeat music) 823 00:31:52,820 --> 00:31:55,030 (rhythmic music) 824 00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:56,790 - Have you been crying? 825 00:31:56,870 --> 00:31:58,870 (Turk sniffing) 826 00:31:58,950 --> 00:32:00,460 You smell like my aunt. 827 00:32:01,500 --> 00:32:03,670 (sniffs) Is that Come to Me? 828 00:32:04,580 --> 00:32:06,880 - No, it's allergies. 829 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:10,130 - Oh, well, I hope you ain't allergic to hotties. 830 00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:12,430 Take a look at the boofay tonight. 831 00:32:12,510 --> 00:32:15,390 Go ahead, pick one out. 832 00:32:15,470 --> 00:32:16,220 - Pick one out? 833 00:32:16,300 --> 00:32:17,970 It's not that easy. 834 00:32:18,060 --> 00:32:19,220 - Come on. 835 00:32:19,310 --> 00:32:22,100 - What makes you such an expert on women anyways? 836 00:32:22,190 --> 00:32:23,310 - POP. 837 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:26,570 Power of the Pussy. 838 00:32:27,770 --> 00:32:30,360 - (scoffs) Did you get that in like a gumball machine? 839 00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:33,070 - Well, scoff if you will, one-timer, 840 00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:37,080 but pussy rules the universe. 841 00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,620 - More like money rules the universe. 842 00:32:39,700 --> 00:32:41,250 - Oh, come on, man. 843 00:32:41,330 --> 00:32:43,670 Everything men do is because of the pussy. 844 00:32:44,670 --> 00:32:46,920 You think they want fame, power, money, 845 00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:48,090 just for the sake of it? 846 00:32:48,170 --> 00:32:49,380 Shit, no! 847 00:32:49,460 --> 00:32:52,880 They know that all that crap leads to pussy. 848 00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:56,220 - You know, we evolved from cavemen 849 00:32:56,300 --> 00:32:59,470 like thousands and thousands of years ago, right? 850 00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:02,520 - Well, can't ignore your primality. 851 00:33:02,600 --> 00:33:04,190 - It's not a word. 852 00:33:04,270 --> 00:33:05,650 - See anything you like? 853 00:33:07,940 --> 00:33:09,400 - She's beautiful. 854 00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:10,780 (blonde slurps lips) 855 00:33:10,860 --> 00:33:12,320 (upbeat music) 856 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,160 - Look, have you seen that Julia Roberts movie? 857 00:33:15,240 --> 00:33:18,120 "Eat, Pray, Love." 858 00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:19,280 - Yeah. - Yeah. 859 00:33:19,370 --> 00:33:21,200 Well, now you're looking at the sequel, 860 00:33:21,290 --> 00:33:23,580 "Eat, Eat, Eat." 861 00:33:23,660 --> 00:33:26,790 Come on, man, I have a reputation to uphold! 862 00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:28,960 - Come on, she seems... 863 00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:32,130 (blonde grumbling) 864 00:33:34,550 --> 00:33:37,800 - Oh. - Mother of all Manatees. 865 00:33:37,890 --> 00:33:39,510 (blonde grumbling) 866 00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,640 - Mmm. (Bob gasps) 867 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:44,480 Yep, uh, blonde at the booth. 868 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:45,640 She's beautiful. 869 00:33:45,730 --> 00:33:46,810 - Oh. 870 00:33:46,900 --> 00:33:48,270 Binjo! 871 00:33:48,360 --> 00:33:51,110 - Like, I wasn't that drunk. (laughing) 872 00:33:51,190 --> 00:33:54,360 (ladies laughing) 873 00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:55,570 - Hello, ladies. 874 00:33:57,070 --> 00:33:59,700 Didn't expect to see anyone sitting in our koala booth, 875 00:33:59,780 --> 00:34:02,240 but hey, it happens. 876 00:34:03,120 --> 00:34:04,250 - Koala booth? 877 00:34:04,330 --> 00:34:06,460 - Yeah, you know, donated by the zoo. 878 00:34:06,540 --> 00:34:09,290 Kind of like a, like a hospital wing, ha. 879 00:34:09,380 --> 00:34:12,750 Everybody knows about the, uh, the koala booth. 880 00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:17,260 - Wait, you're from the zoo and work with koalas? 881 00:34:19,340 --> 00:34:20,760 Oh my god. 882 00:34:20,850 --> 00:34:22,060 Here, sit down. 883 00:34:22,140 --> 00:34:24,060 We didn't mean to take your booth. 884 00:34:25,020 --> 00:34:28,770 - Well, don't mind if we poo. (chuckles) 885 00:34:30,730 --> 00:34:32,770 (Turk and ladies chuckling) 886 00:34:32,860 --> 00:34:34,860 - Oh my god, so koalas. 887 00:34:34,940 --> 00:34:36,070 What are they like? 888 00:34:36,150 --> 00:34:39,110 - Oh, they're the cutest little fuckers ever. 889 00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:42,330 Like, little hairy Italian babies. 890 00:34:43,240 --> 00:34:44,870 - You get to hold them? 891 00:34:44,950 --> 00:34:46,620 - Oh, of course. 892 00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:49,540 Say hello to Butterbuns. 893 00:34:50,880 --> 00:34:54,300 One of the only albino koalas on the whole planet. 894 00:34:54,380 --> 00:34:57,550 - [Both] Aw! So white. 895 00:34:57,630 --> 00:34:59,550 - White like a bleached asshole 896 00:34:59,630 --> 00:35:03,560 staring you in the eye on a moonless night at a Motel 6. 897 00:35:03,640 --> 00:35:06,220 - I love a bleached asshole. 898 00:35:06,310 --> 00:35:08,730 - You have a koala, for Christ's sake? 899 00:35:08,810 --> 00:35:10,350 - [Both] Aw. 900 00:35:11,480 --> 00:35:14,320 - I keep a bottle of eucalyptus juice in the glove box. 901 00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:16,150 Just spray it all over her. 902 00:35:16,230 --> 00:35:18,150 That little white bastard will cling to her 903 00:35:18,240 --> 00:35:21,820 like a dingleberry on a truck driver's ass hair. 904 00:35:21,910 --> 00:35:24,990 - Aw. - Aw, I wanna hold him. 905 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:26,290 - Well, you know, they don't do well 906 00:35:26,370 --> 00:35:29,250 with all the, uh, the noise and the commotion. 907 00:35:29,330 --> 00:35:33,080 So, uh, listen, why don't you take her down to the car 908 00:35:33,170 --> 00:35:35,500 and show her little Butterbuns, Bob? 909 00:35:37,010 --> 00:35:38,510 - Oh my god, really? 910 00:35:38,590 --> 00:35:39,970 - Let's go. 911 00:35:40,050 --> 00:35:41,970 - Oh, okay. (laughing) 912 00:35:42,050 --> 00:35:43,050 Oh my god! 913 00:35:45,220 --> 00:35:47,890 - Ah, isn't he cute? - Oh, yeah. 914 00:35:47,970 --> 00:35:49,890 - White, fluffy. 915 00:35:49,980 --> 00:35:54,110 Like a tampon that's been left out in the rain. (laughing) 916 00:35:54,190 --> 00:35:56,940 (both moaning) 917 00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:01,490 - Yes, okay. 918 00:36:03,530 --> 00:36:05,620 - When can I meet the koala? 919 00:36:05,700 --> 00:36:07,290 - The, uh, koa, yeah! 920 00:36:07,370 --> 00:36:09,200 The, um, right. 921 00:36:09,290 --> 00:36:11,870 - Is he fucking over here? - Oh, yeah! 922 00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:15,210 - This should get him out. 923 00:36:15,290 --> 00:36:16,590 (spray hissing) (Aboriginal Australian music) 924 00:36:16,670 --> 00:36:17,710 - Oh, yeah. 925 00:36:18,550 --> 00:36:20,420 (Butterbuns sniffing) 926 00:36:20,510 --> 00:36:21,510 - Whew! 927 00:36:22,510 --> 00:36:24,010 - While we're waiting, 928 00:36:24,090 --> 00:36:25,720 let's see if I can get the python 929 00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:28,890 to come out of the reptile house, Mr. Zookeeper. 930 00:36:28,970 --> 00:36:30,810 - Oh, that's me. - Oh, yeah. 931 00:36:30,890 --> 00:36:32,940 You got some venom down there for Mommy? 932 00:36:33,020 --> 00:36:34,650 - I don't know. - Oh, yeah! 933 00:36:34,730 --> 00:36:35,610 A big python. 934 00:36:35,690 --> 00:36:38,270 Oh my god! It's purple! 935 00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:39,150 - Oh my god! 936 00:36:39,230 --> 00:36:43,990 - Ah! (spray hissing) 937 00:36:44,070 --> 00:36:44,820 Ah! 938 00:36:44,910 --> 00:36:46,030 (date screaming) 939 00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:47,280 - Oh my god! 940 00:36:48,120 --> 00:36:49,990 (car horn honks a lively tune) 941 00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:52,210 (Bob yelling) 942 00:36:52,290 --> 00:36:53,330 I don't know what to do! 943 00:36:53,420 --> 00:36:54,500 (fist smacking) (Butterbuns pattering) 944 00:36:54,580 --> 00:36:57,040 (date screaming) (Butterbuns pattering) 945 00:36:57,130 --> 00:36:58,170 No! 946 00:36:58,250 --> 00:36:59,340 (date screaming) (Butterbuns pattering) 947 00:36:59,420 --> 00:37:00,340 Help! Please! 948 00:37:00,420 --> 00:37:02,760 (date screaming) (Butterbuns pattering) 949 00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:05,180 Butterbuns! Down! (car horn honks a lively tune) 950 00:37:05,260 --> 00:37:06,340 (date screaming) (Butterbuns pattering) 951 00:37:06,430 --> 00:37:07,550 (light pole pings) 952 00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:09,010 Oh! 953 00:37:09,100 --> 00:37:10,310 (Butterbuns grunting) 954 00:37:10,390 --> 00:37:11,140 Stop! 955 00:37:11,220 --> 00:37:12,850 (Butterbuns grunting) 956 00:37:12,930 --> 00:37:14,270 He's fucking her face! 957 00:37:14,350 --> 00:37:15,350 (Butterbuns grunting) 958 00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:16,190 Koala rape! 959 00:37:16,270 --> 00:37:17,860 (Butterbuns grunting) 960 00:37:17,940 --> 00:37:18,820 Koala fucking! 961 00:37:18,900 --> 00:37:20,530 (Butterbuns grunting) 962 00:37:20,610 --> 00:37:21,610 Please! Help! 963 00:37:21,690 --> 00:37:23,190 (car horn honks a lively tune) 964 00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:24,610 - Wait. What the hell? 965 00:37:24,700 --> 00:37:26,360 She screamed? - Yeah. 966 00:37:27,910 --> 00:37:29,530 My cock is purple, Turk. 967 00:37:29,620 --> 00:37:33,250 Don't you remember the goofy grape Slurpee idea you had? 968 00:37:33,330 --> 00:37:35,370 - Wait a minute, wait a minute. 969 00:37:35,460 --> 00:37:37,920 You're telling me you still have Smurf cock? 970 00:37:38,630 --> 00:37:40,040 - Yeah. 971 00:37:40,130 --> 00:37:42,590 - You didn't, like, douche it in vinegar or something? 972 00:37:42,670 --> 00:37:45,760 - What? Douche it off with vinegar? 973 00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,720 No, more like why did I let you convince me 974 00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:51,850 to put onion rings on my dick in the first place? 975 00:37:51,930 --> 00:37:53,770 (Turk laughing) 976 00:37:53,850 --> 00:37:54,810 It's not funny, Turk. 977 00:37:54,890 --> 00:37:57,690 (Turk laughing) 978 00:38:01,820 --> 00:38:05,820 (Bob and Turk laughing) 979 00:38:05,900 --> 00:38:08,240 It is kind of funny if you think about it. 980 00:38:08,320 --> 00:38:11,830 (Bob and Turk laughing) 981 00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,420 - Hey, I got a box of donuts in the back. 982 00:38:17,500 --> 00:38:18,420 You wanna try those? 983 00:38:18,500 --> 00:38:22,000 (Bob and Turk laughing) 984 00:38:23,170 --> 00:38:25,920 - I got, like, second-degree burns on my dick. 985 00:38:26,010 --> 00:38:28,340 - [Turk] It's like a deep-fried totem pole. 986 00:38:28,430 --> 00:38:32,140 - Yeah! (Bob and Turk laughing) 987 00:38:32,220 --> 00:38:35,730 (Bob and Turk laughing) 988 00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:39,150 Where do you come up with this shit? 989 00:38:39,230 --> 00:38:41,270 I mean, albino koalas? 990 00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:44,820 - Hey, it's what I do, junior. 991 00:38:44,900 --> 00:38:46,360 It's my job. 992 00:38:46,440 --> 00:38:49,360 - Well, you're damn good at it, I gotta tell you that. 993 00:38:49,450 --> 00:38:51,700 I gotta ask, why? All this, why? 994 00:38:51,780 --> 00:38:53,030 I mean, you're a fully grown adult 995 00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:55,700 and yet you do this for a living? 996 00:38:55,790 --> 00:38:57,080 What am I missing here? 997 00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:58,460 Not that there's anything wrong with what you do, 998 00:38:58,540 --> 00:39:00,880 it's just, like, I don't know, come on. 999 00:39:00,960 --> 00:39:03,670 It's not like they teach wingman classes at DeVry. 1000 00:39:03,750 --> 00:39:06,340 (laughs) Fail, you know? (laughs) 1001 00:39:06,420 --> 00:39:07,260 - Hey! 1002 00:39:07,420 --> 00:39:10,090 (tires squealing) 1003 00:39:13,930 --> 00:39:16,980 Failing's for guys that don't complete their missions. 1004 00:39:17,060 --> 00:39:20,400 I will complete my mission, 1005 00:39:20,480 --> 00:39:24,730 so don't ever say fail to me again, ever! 1006 00:39:25,440 --> 00:39:27,400 - Relax, Turk, I was just asking. 1007 00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:30,780 - Yeah, okay. 1008 00:39:30,860 --> 00:39:31,870 Listen, 1009 00:39:33,280 --> 00:39:34,910 we're here to get you laid. 1010 00:39:36,080 --> 00:39:38,120 Not talk about my personal life. 1011 00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:41,830 - Okay, understood. 1012 00:39:46,750 --> 00:39:48,920 Oh, and Turk. - Yeah. 1013 00:39:49,010 --> 00:39:51,090 - Sorry about losing Butterbuns. 1014 00:39:51,180 --> 00:39:55,100 - Don't worry, he always comes home to Daddy. 1015 00:39:56,260 --> 00:39:58,020 Shorty's Sports Bar, 1016 00:39:58,100 --> 00:40:00,600 tomorrow, after work. 1017 00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:02,400 - [Bob] Got it. 1018 00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:06,570 (car engine cranks and rumbles) 1019 00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:12,660 - Come on, there's gotta be something on this guy. 1020 00:40:13,530 --> 00:40:17,870 (keyboard keys clacking) Turk Thompson. 1021 00:40:17,950 --> 00:40:19,330 - What are you doing, baby? 1022 00:40:19,410 --> 00:40:21,370 It's late, come to bed. 1023 00:40:22,170 --> 00:40:24,710 - You ever hear of a wingman, baby? 1024 00:40:24,790 --> 00:40:26,130 - Yeah, of course. 1025 00:40:26,210 --> 00:40:27,840 - You have? - Sure. 1026 00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:29,380 I have an uncle that's a wingman. 1027 00:40:29,460 --> 00:40:32,880 - Can I meet him? - Yes, anything. 1028 00:40:33,970 --> 00:40:34,930 Just come to bed. 1029 00:40:39,640 --> 00:40:42,140 (Megan giggling) 1030 00:40:42,230 --> 00:40:44,850 Mmm. (chuckles) 1031 00:40:46,310 --> 00:40:49,280 (TV crowd cheering) 1032 00:40:49,360 --> 00:40:51,490 (upbeat rock music) 1033 00:40:51,570 --> 00:40:54,490 - I didn't know hot women came to sports bars. 1034 00:40:54,570 --> 00:40:56,620 - Oh yeah, they like to hunt here. 1035 00:40:57,780 --> 00:41:00,240 You, uh, you enjoying the dip? 1036 00:41:02,250 --> 00:41:04,710 - Oh yeah, it's a little gooey, but- 1037 00:41:04,790 --> 00:41:07,250 - Yeah, 'cause that's my hair gel. 1038 00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:10,340 (Bob gags) 1039 00:41:10,420 --> 00:41:12,420 Okay now, let's see. 1040 00:41:12,510 --> 00:41:15,050 No, that one's got a crooked leg. 1041 00:41:15,130 --> 00:41:17,260 Maybe you, not that one. 1042 00:41:18,350 --> 00:41:19,760 - You know, I've been meaning to ask you, Turk. 1043 00:41:19,850 --> 00:41:21,810 You clearly have all these women figured out. 1044 00:41:21,890 --> 00:41:23,060 How are you with the ladies? 1045 00:41:23,140 --> 00:41:25,440 You must have like a million girlfriends. 1046 00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:27,400 - No, I keep it simple. 1047 00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:30,480 Just one, you, uh, you wanna meet her? 1048 00:41:31,690 --> 00:41:33,190 - Sure, yeah. 1049 00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:34,280 Is she here? 1050 00:41:35,450 --> 00:41:37,120 - Say hello to Betty. 1051 00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:39,450 - Oh, what the hell is that? 1052 00:41:39,530 --> 00:41:40,830 - Betty, this is Bob. 1053 00:41:40,910 --> 00:41:42,160 Bob, this is Betty. 1054 00:41:42,250 --> 00:41:44,620 - Turk, please, people are eating. 1055 00:41:44,710 --> 00:41:47,250 - Listen, kid, she's the perfect girl. 1056 00:41:47,330 --> 00:41:48,790 She doesn't need to go to dinner. 1057 00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:50,670 She doesn't need to go shopping. 1058 00:41:50,750 --> 00:41:52,260 She, uh, 1059 00:41:52,340 --> 00:41:53,880 keeps me satisfied. 1060 00:41:53,970 --> 00:41:54,970 - What, do you just carry that thing 1061 00:41:55,050 --> 00:41:56,630 around with you all the time? 1062 00:41:56,720 --> 00:42:01,100 - Listen, kid, the vagina's like a magic amulet, 1063 00:42:01,180 --> 00:42:02,810 turns men into zombies. 1064 00:42:02,890 --> 00:42:07,310 Yeah, wherever it goes, they go. 1065 00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:10,940 Power of the pussy, baby. 1066 00:42:11,020 --> 00:42:14,570 No man can resist. - What the? 1067 00:42:17,410 --> 00:42:19,910 - Dog rescue reject coming in hard. 1068 00:42:20,910 --> 00:42:25,410 Yeah, I see her at every social event in town. 1069 00:42:26,410 --> 00:42:28,460 So here's what we're gonna do, 1070 00:42:28,540 --> 00:42:32,090 I'll use Betty to take out the jock meatheads 1071 00:42:32,170 --> 00:42:34,170 and you go in for the kill. 1072 00:42:34,260 --> 00:42:37,180 (jocks and Valencia speaking faintly) 1073 00:42:37,260 --> 00:42:38,840 Excuse me, boys. 1074 00:42:39,760 --> 00:42:41,180 Okay. 1075 00:42:41,260 --> 00:42:43,220 - Yeah, why don't you watch where you're going, asshole? 1076 00:42:43,310 --> 00:42:46,810 - Oh, why don't you watch this, hm? 1077 00:42:46,890 --> 00:42:49,100 (mesmerizing music) Come on, boys, come on. 1078 00:42:50,940 --> 00:42:52,360 Come on. 1079 00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:53,270 - Hello. - Hi. 1080 00:42:54,610 --> 00:42:55,530 - How are you? 1081 00:42:55,610 --> 00:42:58,490 (mesmerizing music) 1082 00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:14,960 - Hey, what are we doing out here? 1083 00:43:15,050 --> 00:43:16,800 Let's kick this old dude's ass! 1084 00:43:17,470 --> 00:43:20,050 (upbeat thrilling music) 1085 00:43:20,130 --> 00:43:21,220 (Turk grunts) 1086 00:43:21,300 --> 00:43:22,300 (body smacks in wall) 1087 00:43:22,390 --> 00:43:23,350 (upbeat thrilling music) 1088 00:43:23,430 --> 00:43:24,350 (Turk grunts) 1089 00:43:24,430 --> 00:43:27,430 (body thumps) (trash clanking) 1090 00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:30,940 (mesmerizing music) 1091 00:43:31,020 --> 00:43:31,770 (Turk grunts) 1092 00:43:31,850 --> 00:43:32,610 (upbeat thrilling music) 1093 00:43:32,690 --> 00:43:34,480 (thug grunts) 1094 00:43:34,570 --> 00:43:37,400 (trash bin lid thuds) 1095 00:43:37,490 --> 00:43:40,450 - [Stranger] Hey, wingman, you got time for one more? 1096 00:43:40,530 --> 00:43:44,240 (suspenseful music) 1097 00:43:44,330 --> 00:43:48,750 - Jesus, there's always one that won't stay down. 1098 00:43:48,830 --> 00:43:52,460 (thrilling mellow music) 1099 00:43:57,550 --> 00:43:59,420 Fuck me tender in the night. 1100 00:43:59,510 --> 00:44:01,380 - You left your asshat alone in there. 1101 00:44:01,470 --> 00:44:04,300 A wingman never leaves his man. 1102 00:44:04,390 --> 00:44:07,600 - But I had, I had enemy combatants coming in on all sides. 1103 00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:09,680 There was, 'cause they were, they were all- 1104 00:44:09,770 --> 00:44:13,940 (thrilling mellow music ending) 1105 00:44:15,770 --> 00:44:20,990 (gentle mellow music) (sirens blaring in background) 1106 00:44:30,580 --> 00:44:31,790 - It's really interesting. 1107 00:44:31,870 --> 00:44:33,460 - I know. - Yeah. 1108 00:44:33,540 --> 00:44:36,920 - Well, my last dog died. 1109 00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,130 - Oh no. - Yeah. 1110 00:44:39,210 --> 00:44:41,550 - That's unfortunate. - I know. 1111 00:44:43,550 --> 00:44:47,310 Oh, no, that's so sad. 1112 00:44:47,390 --> 00:44:49,600 How did he die, your dog? 1113 00:44:49,680 --> 00:44:51,600 - Hit by a bus. - A greyhound? 1114 00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:55,610 - No, it was a chihuahua. - Oh. 1115 00:44:55,690 --> 00:44:58,150 - Yeah. (sobs) 1116 00:44:59,980 --> 00:45:02,650 - Look, you show her tears, she's all yours. 1117 00:45:02,740 --> 00:45:05,490 - I can't cry on demand. 1118 00:45:05,570 --> 00:45:09,580 - All right, this is gonna sting, but it will get you tears. 1119 00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:12,210 - Ow! 1120 00:45:12,290 --> 00:45:15,710 Fuck! 1121 00:45:15,790 --> 00:45:19,000 (drink sloshing) 1122 00:45:19,090 --> 00:45:21,760 (Bob sobbing) 1123 00:45:23,090 --> 00:45:24,380 - You. - Yeah. 1124 00:45:25,090 --> 00:45:26,180 - You're crying. 1125 00:45:26,260 --> 00:45:27,350 - So sad. 1126 00:45:27,430 --> 00:45:30,140 (both moaning) 1127 00:45:33,270 --> 00:45:34,850 - One sec. - Yeah. 1128 00:45:34,940 --> 00:45:36,730 Oh, no, you don't have- 1129 00:45:36,810 --> 00:45:38,560 (Valencia slurping) 1130 00:45:38,650 --> 00:45:40,150 Oh god. 1131 00:45:40,230 --> 00:45:41,650 Oh, mm-mm, mm-mm. 1132 00:45:42,990 --> 00:45:45,740 (Bob coughing) 1133 00:45:46,570 --> 00:45:49,660 - Is he okay? - Just emotional. 1134 00:45:49,740 --> 00:45:50,740 He, uh, 1135 00:45:50,830 --> 00:45:52,200 he also had a chihuahua. - Oh, yeah? 1136 00:45:52,290 --> 00:45:55,580 - Died in a horrible lawnmower accident. 1137 00:45:55,670 --> 00:45:57,670 Meat everywhere. - Oh my god. 1138 00:45:57,750 --> 00:45:58,920 - Yeah. 1139 00:45:59,000 --> 00:46:00,670 You know what the irony is? - Yeah? 1140 00:46:00,750 --> 00:46:03,420 - Dog's name was Taco. - Taco. 1141 00:46:03,510 --> 00:46:05,930 - The little bugeyed, trembly bastard. 1142 00:46:06,010 --> 00:46:11,180 - Oh my god, Taco? (sobs) 1143 00:46:12,140 --> 00:46:14,600 (Bob gags) 1144 00:46:15,390 --> 00:46:18,270 (car engine rumbling) 1145 00:46:18,350 --> 00:46:20,020 - Turk, you're awfully quiet. 1146 00:46:20,110 --> 00:46:20,940 You okay? 1147 00:46:21,020 --> 00:46:23,320 (car engine rumbling) 1148 00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:26,110 Like you've seen a ghost or something. 1149 00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:29,070 (gentle music) 1150 00:46:29,160 --> 00:46:32,700 - Yeah, maybe I did. 1151 00:46:32,790 --> 00:46:35,500 (gentle music) 1152 00:46:36,330 --> 00:46:40,380 Doesn't matter, time for new targets. 1153 00:46:40,460 --> 00:46:44,010 No more dog ladies, it's time for cats. 1154 00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:46,590 We're headed to Cougar Country. 1155 00:46:46,670 --> 00:46:47,510 (cougar yowls) (upbeat music) 1156 00:46:47,590 --> 00:46:50,930 (car engine rumbling) 1157 00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:56,770 (cougar yowls) (upbeat music) 1158 00:46:57,350 --> 00:47:00,020 (gentle mellow music) 1159 00:47:10,660 --> 00:47:12,870 Barbara Botox at six o'clock. 1160 00:47:12,950 --> 00:47:16,000 (gentle mellow music) 1161 00:47:16,080 --> 00:47:16,910 Let's go. 1162 00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:20,330 (gentle mellow music) 1163 00:47:21,460 --> 00:47:23,420 Hello, Lord Greystoke, uh, 1164 00:47:23,500 --> 00:47:25,050 beautiful art, isn't it? 1165 00:47:27,050 --> 00:47:29,220 This is Bob, he's an artist. 1166 00:47:29,300 --> 00:47:32,140 - It is so sensual. - Mhmm. 1167 00:47:32,220 --> 00:47:35,390 You know, I paint, um- 1168 00:47:35,470 --> 00:47:36,520 - Nudes. 1169 00:47:38,180 --> 00:47:39,810 - Dog lady at three o'clock. 1170 00:47:39,890 --> 00:47:40,810 I told you she's everywhere. 1171 00:47:40,900 --> 00:47:42,270 (dog whimpering) 1172 00:47:42,350 --> 00:47:43,730 Can't let her see you. 1173 00:47:43,810 --> 00:47:45,070 Time to D and D. 1174 00:47:45,150 --> 00:47:47,610 Divert. Distract. 1175 00:47:47,690 --> 00:47:51,030 (gentle mellow music) 1176 00:47:53,410 --> 00:47:56,540 - You know, how about I grab us a couple drinks? 1177 00:47:56,620 --> 00:48:00,790 No, let me. (flaps tongue quickly) 1178 00:48:00,870 --> 00:48:04,210 (gentle mellow music) 1179 00:48:07,420 --> 00:48:09,010 - There's nothing there. 1180 00:48:09,670 --> 00:48:12,800 - Well, maybe to an albino. 1181 00:48:12,890 --> 00:48:15,810 It's like a tampon that's been hit by a steamroller. 1182 00:48:15,890 --> 00:48:17,180 - [Valencia] Oh. 1183 00:48:17,260 --> 00:48:18,520 - Bro, what are you doing here? 1184 00:48:18,600 --> 00:48:20,350 - Skip. - I've been searching the net 1185 00:48:20,430 --> 00:48:22,060 for days on your wingman guy, 1186 00:48:22,140 --> 00:48:23,270 and I can't find anything. 1187 00:48:23,350 --> 00:48:24,270 - Do you think he's on the run? 1188 00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:25,650 You think he's like a criminal? 1189 00:48:25,730 --> 00:48:28,030 - I'm not sure, I might have to go on the dark web. 1190 00:48:28,110 --> 00:48:29,570 Megan has an uncle that might be able to help, 1191 00:48:29,650 --> 00:48:31,150 so I'll set up a lunch meeting. 1192 00:48:31,240 --> 00:48:32,570 - Okay, got it. 1193 00:48:32,660 --> 00:48:33,570 - Nice suit. 1194 00:48:33,660 --> 00:48:36,990 (gentle mellow music) 1195 00:48:37,870 --> 00:48:39,540 - I like old (indistinct). 1196 00:48:39,620 --> 00:48:41,000 - Well. (dog whimpers) 1197 00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:43,370 So do ghosts. (gentle mellow music) 1198 00:48:43,460 --> 00:48:45,920 (gentle mellow music stops abruptly) 1199 00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:48,380 - I give you nothing. 1200 00:48:48,460 --> 00:48:51,550 (patrons clapping) 1201 00:48:51,630 --> 00:48:55,550 We are all nothing. 1202 00:48:55,640 --> 00:48:58,510 You are nothing. 1203 00:48:59,390 --> 00:49:01,020 I am 1204 00:49:02,100 --> 00:49:02,980 nothing. 1205 00:49:03,060 --> 00:49:04,730 (patrons gasping) 1206 00:49:04,810 --> 00:49:07,150 (gentle mellow music) 1207 00:49:07,230 --> 00:49:08,400 - Oh. 1208 00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:13,400 - So what do you think of the art? (laps drink) 1209 00:49:15,030 --> 00:49:17,280 - It is all in the mind, people. 1210 00:49:17,370 --> 00:49:19,660 We are all but fragments. 1211 00:49:20,490 --> 00:49:24,170 For what is a man with no legs? 1212 00:49:25,080 --> 00:49:28,340 What is a woman with one arm? 1213 00:49:29,590 --> 00:49:33,470 - A 50/50 shot at a hand job where I come from? 1214 00:49:35,720 --> 00:49:38,350 (Nothing popping) 1215 00:49:38,430 --> 00:49:39,720 (Nothing clicking) 1216 00:49:39,810 --> 00:49:43,140 (Nothing popping) 1217 00:49:43,230 --> 00:49:44,270 (Nothing clicking and popping) 1218 00:49:44,350 --> 00:49:46,520 (Turk chirps) (patrons clapping) 1219 00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:49,110 (Madame Glaze lapping drink) 1220 00:49:49,190 --> 00:49:53,780 - What you're saying is everything is nothing. 1221 00:49:54,570 --> 00:49:56,110 - Exactly. 1222 00:49:56,200 --> 00:49:59,030 You see, am I petting this dog? 1223 00:49:59,120 --> 00:50:00,120 - Yeah. 1224 00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:01,830 - Or am I petting nothing? 1225 00:50:02,700 --> 00:50:05,960 Am I touching this man's face? 1226 00:50:06,040 --> 00:50:07,670 Or am I touching nothing? 1227 00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:12,460 Am I holding this furried animal? 1228 00:50:13,510 --> 00:50:15,090 Or am I holding nothing? 1229 00:50:17,090 --> 00:50:18,180 Ladies and gentlemen, 1230 00:50:18,260 --> 00:50:21,470 I give to you nothing! (dog growling) 1231 00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:24,270 - Here's something! (dog whimpers) 1232 00:50:24,350 --> 00:50:25,980 (blood splatters) (Valencia screams) 1233 00:50:26,060 --> 00:50:29,310 (patrons yelling) 1234 00:50:29,400 --> 00:50:31,520 - Know anywhere quiet we could go? 1235 00:50:31,610 --> 00:50:34,610 (patrons yelling) 1236 00:50:37,740 --> 00:50:40,910 (upbeat mellow music) 1237 00:50:44,080 --> 00:50:45,830 (upbeat mellow music ends) 1238 00:50:48,170 --> 00:50:51,000 - I have to warn you, my place is a bit of a disaster area. 1239 00:50:51,090 --> 00:50:52,420 Had I known you were coming I- 1240 00:50:52,670 --> 00:50:54,800 (gentle music) 1241 00:50:54,880 --> 00:50:56,840 - Well, if this is messy, 1242 00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:58,630 I'd love to see what clean looks like. 1243 00:50:58,720 --> 00:50:59,510 - Yeah, right. 1244 00:50:59,590 --> 00:51:03,600 - Mm. - Oh, okay. 1245 00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:05,350 - Come on. - Oh, uh, 1246 00:51:05,430 --> 00:51:07,430 well, why don't you make yourself comfortable. 1247 00:51:07,520 --> 00:51:08,890 I'll get us some drinks. 1248 00:51:10,230 --> 00:51:12,270 - [Holly] "Hey, Bob, here's all the work 1249 00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:14,190 for your presentation. 1250 00:51:14,280 --> 00:51:16,360 I hope you don't mind, I straightened up a little. 1251 00:51:16,440 --> 00:51:19,610 P.S. Watch out for the rat traps, Holly." 1252 00:51:19,700 --> 00:51:22,620 ♪ Ooh, sexy lady ♪ 1253 00:51:23,330 --> 00:51:24,540 - So I- 1254 00:51:24,620 --> 00:51:28,120 (Madame Glaze growling) 1255 00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:34,380 - Well. 1256 00:51:34,460 --> 00:51:36,380 What took you so long? 1257 00:51:36,460 --> 00:51:40,130 I'm more swollen than cheese puffs in an air fryer. 1258 00:51:42,890 --> 00:51:43,850 (Bob thumps onto couch) 1259 00:51:43,930 --> 00:51:44,720 - Oh my god. 1260 00:51:45,760 --> 00:51:47,060 (Bob mumbling) 1261 00:51:47,140 --> 00:51:49,390 - Mmm. (Bob mumbling) 1262 00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:51,690 Ah. (Bob mumbling) 1263 00:51:51,770 --> 00:51:52,900 Ah. (Bob mumbling) 1264 00:51:52,980 --> 00:51:54,150 You feel good. 1265 00:51:55,650 --> 00:51:56,440 - Oh! 1266 00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:58,610 (Madame Glaze growls) 1267 00:51:58,690 --> 00:52:02,530 I, you know, I just think we're moving a little bit fast. 1268 00:52:03,740 --> 00:52:04,700 - Good. 1269 00:52:04,780 --> 00:52:06,580 I like it fast. 1270 00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:10,410 It's party time, Pinky. 1271 00:52:10,500 --> 00:52:13,460 ♪ Do that thing that you know how to do ♪ 1272 00:52:13,540 --> 00:52:14,340 - Ooh. 1273 00:52:14,420 --> 00:52:15,500 Oh, no, no. 1274 00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:17,630 (Bob slaps couch) 1275 00:52:17,710 --> 00:52:20,510 (hand smacks butt) Ah! 1276 00:52:20,590 --> 00:52:22,590 - You're a very lucky man, Bob. 1277 00:52:24,140 --> 00:52:26,140 No blood vessels have been ruptured. 1278 00:52:27,390 --> 00:52:29,680 - Look, does everyone have to be in here? 1279 00:52:31,060 --> 00:52:36,360 - Though I've never seen such rampant purple bruising. 1280 00:52:36,520 --> 00:52:40,190 (gentle mellow music) 1281 00:52:40,280 --> 00:52:41,200 - Really? 1282 00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:44,450 (everyone laughing) 1283 00:52:47,330 --> 00:52:50,870 (gentle mellow music ends) 1284 00:52:52,040 --> 00:52:56,380 - All right, that was a mild setback. 1285 00:52:56,460 --> 00:52:59,050 We're gonna let the purple-asaurus rest for a night, 1286 00:52:59,130 --> 00:53:01,130 and then we're back on it tomorrow. 1287 00:53:01,220 --> 00:53:03,090 - Yeah. - Dress real nice. 1288 00:53:03,180 --> 00:53:04,640 We're going for some, uh, 1289 00:53:07,720 --> 00:53:09,140 Wall Street beaver. 1290 00:53:11,480 --> 00:53:14,310 (Turk chatters) 1291 00:53:16,770 --> 00:53:18,440 - Wall Street beaver? 1292 00:53:19,610 --> 00:53:22,150 - We'll get your girl back, Onion Rings. 1293 00:53:22,240 --> 00:53:23,240 You'll see. 1294 00:53:25,070 --> 00:53:27,200 (car engine cranks and rumbles) 1295 00:53:27,280 --> 00:53:32,500 (tires squealing) (car horn honks a lively tune) 1296 00:53:34,420 --> 00:53:36,670 - Holly, I couldn't believe how clean my place was. 1297 00:53:36,750 --> 00:53:37,670 You didn't have to do that. 1298 00:53:37,750 --> 00:53:39,800 - Yeah, you know, I did. 1299 00:53:39,880 --> 00:53:41,960 I was having nightmares about it, 1300 00:53:42,050 --> 00:53:45,800 and I pictured your apartment getting worse and worse, 1301 00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:47,340 and turning into the blob. 1302 00:53:47,430 --> 00:53:48,550 (Bob laughing) 1303 00:53:48,640 --> 00:53:51,600 And devouring the whole city. 1304 00:53:52,270 --> 00:53:55,100 (both laughing) 1305 00:53:56,980 --> 00:53:58,020 (Holly sighs) 1306 00:53:58,110 --> 00:54:01,190 (gentle music) 1307 00:54:01,280 --> 00:54:02,280 - What? 1308 00:54:02,990 --> 00:54:05,860 (gentle music) 1309 00:54:05,950 --> 00:54:08,200 What are you looking at? 1310 00:54:08,280 --> 00:54:09,780 - Nothing, no, uh. 1311 00:54:11,830 --> 00:54:13,950 Did you do something different with your hair? 1312 00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:15,040 - Yeah. 1313 00:54:16,040 --> 00:54:18,290 I brushed it, you should try it sometime. 1314 00:54:19,590 --> 00:54:21,590 Two days until the presentation, Mister. 1315 00:54:21,670 --> 00:54:23,920 You ready? - I'm getting there. 1316 00:54:24,010 --> 00:54:26,220 I'm, uh, on it all night. 1317 00:54:26,300 --> 00:54:27,840 Your research as been a big help. 1318 00:54:27,930 --> 00:54:30,680 Thanks, Holly. - Hey, it's what I do. 1319 00:54:30,760 --> 00:54:32,560 - Oh, and Holly. - Hmm? 1320 00:54:32,640 --> 00:54:35,270 - Tell Tim I wanna rematch on "Halo," all right. 1321 00:54:36,810 --> 00:54:37,980 - Yeah, um, 1322 00:54:39,310 --> 00:54:40,940 look, Bob, Tim and I- 1323 00:54:41,020 --> 00:54:43,110 - Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, my man. 1324 00:54:44,650 --> 00:54:46,110 Better join me for lunch, pal. 1325 00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:47,990 I got the goods on your wingman. 1326 00:54:48,780 --> 00:54:50,740 License plate panned out. 1327 00:54:52,450 --> 00:54:54,580 - [Bob] What are we doing at an airplane museum? 1328 00:54:54,660 --> 00:54:55,950 - [Skip] We're here to meet a wingman. 1329 00:54:56,040 --> 00:54:57,790 Megan's uncle, Corey. 1330 00:54:59,370 --> 00:55:01,080 - Skip, right? 1331 00:55:01,170 --> 00:55:02,170 - Corey. 1332 00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:05,260 (wheelchair thuds) - Oh! 1333 00:55:05,340 --> 00:55:06,760 - You all right, you all right? 1334 00:55:06,840 --> 00:55:09,260 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, give me a hand here, Turkey Legs. 1335 00:55:09,340 --> 00:55:11,550 Jesus, ah, let's go on a tour. 1336 00:55:11,640 --> 00:55:16,100 The other way, the other way, you goof case. 1337 00:55:16,180 --> 00:55:17,770 All right, let's go, boys. 1338 00:55:17,850 --> 00:55:19,140 - You're not still doing the wingman thing? 1339 00:55:19,230 --> 00:55:20,350 Are you, Uncle Corey? 1340 00:55:20,440 --> 00:55:22,060 - Hell no, that's a young man's game. 1341 00:55:22,150 --> 00:55:24,190 - Have you ever heard of a Turk Thompson? 1342 00:55:24,270 --> 00:55:25,150 - He's a wingman. 1343 00:55:25,230 --> 00:55:27,320 - I've never heard of the guy. 1344 00:55:27,400 --> 00:55:28,320 Who'd he fly with? 1345 00:55:28,400 --> 00:55:30,030 Is he out of Camp Pendleton? 1346 00:55:30,110 --> 00:55:32,120 - Uh, no, we're talking about like a wingman. 1347 00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:36,870 - So am I, Vietnam War, I flew 32 missions over Khe Sanh. 1348 00:55:36,950 --> 00:55:40,120 Some say that the wingman was the most dangerous role 1349 00:55:40,210 --> 00:55:41,630 in the whole military, 1350 00:55:41,710 --> 00:55:43,670 but I was just doing my job. 1351 00:55:43,750 --> 00:55:45,090 - Uh, listen, when you say wingman, 1352 00:55:45,170 --> 00:55:47,510 what exactly are you, like, referring to though? 1353 00:55:47,590 --> 00:55:50,180 - We flew in pairs, protected the fighter bombers 1354 00:55:50,260 --> 00:55:52,300 so they could carry out the missions! 1355 00:55:53,220 --> 00:55:56,310 A lot of us never came home, bugeyes! 1356 00:55:56,390 --> 00:55:59,430 All right, Tinsel Tits, follow me. 1357 00:55:59,520 --> 00:56:03,150 (upbeat military music) 1358 00:56:03,230 --> 00:56:04,400 - What about chicks? 1359 00:56:04,480 --> 00:56:05,900 Did you guys ever pick up chicks at bars? 1360 00:56:05,980 --> 00:56:08,030 - What are you talking about, you pervert? 1361 00:56:08,110 --> 00:56:11,240 Flora and I have been together for 65 years! 1362 00:56:11,320 --> 00:56:12,320 Jesus! 1363 00:56:12,410 --> 00:56:14,780 (planes roaring) 1364 00:56:14,870 --> 00:56:17,830 Boys, you wanna go on a bombing run? 1365 00:56:17,910 --> 00:56:19,250 Ha-ha, yeah. 1366 00:56:20,330 --> 00:56:24,130 (upbeat military music) 1367 00:56:24,210 --> 00:56:27,380 (gentle jazz music) 1368 00:56:30,590 --> 00:56:31,590 - Hey, Turk. 1369 00:56:33,890 --> 00:56:35,510 I thought you said to dress up. 1370 00:56:35,600 --> 00:56:37,180 - Yeah, and? 1371 00:56:38,930 --> 00:56:40,640 - You look good. - Look, 1372 00:56:41,690 --> 00:56:43,850 these chicks run with a tough crowd, all right? 1373 00:56:43,940 --> 00:56:46,690 They're smart, most of them have degrees. 1374 00:56:46,770 --> 00:56:48,780 But if you can bag a smart chick, 1375 00:56:48,860 --> 00:56:50,570 you can get just about anyone. 1376 00:56:52,450 --> 00:56:54,870 - Do you have to make it sound so greasy? 1377 00:56:54,950 --> 00:56:56,740 What if I just try being myself? 1378 00:56:57,700 --> 00:56:59,240 - How the hell you gonna do that? 1379 00:56:59,330 --> 00:57:02,660 - I always wanted to go fly fishing with a girl, you know? 1380 00:57:02,750 --> 00:57:04,540 You know, just two people out in the wilderness, 1381 00:57:04,630 --> 00:57:05,460 out in nature? 1382 00:57:05,540 --> 00:57:07,500 No bars, no pickup lines, 1383 00:57:07,590 --> 00:57:10,670 just two people being themselves. 1384 00:57:10,760 --> 00:57:11,720 - Ugh. 1385 00:57:11,800 --> 00:57:14,720 (Turk pattering) 1386 00:57:17,260 --> 00:57:19,470 Are you freaking cereal right now? 1387 00:57:19,560 --> 00:57:21,390 This isn't 1942. 1388 00:57:21,480 --> 00:57:23,890 Those kind of girls don't exist anymore. 1389 00:57:24,730 --> 00:57:25,810 Don't be an idiot. 1390 00:57:25,900 --> 00:57:27,190 Pay attention. 1391 00:57:27,270 --> 00:57:30,110 Do as I say, take this. 1392 00:57:33,150 --> 00:57:35,490 - What the hell am I supposed to do with this? 1393 00:57:35,570 --> 00:57:38,740 - Girls in this place are, uh, thinkers. 1394 00:57:38,830 --> 00:57:41,660 They need stimuli to get their juices going. 1395 00:57:42,580 --> 00:57:43,540 Come on. 1396 00:57:45,170 --> 00:57:47,040 There's your mark, let's go. 1397 00:57:50,090 --> 00:57:51,630 - Fossil fuels got us this far. 1398 00:57:51,710 --> 00:57:52,840 I think we're gonna be okay. 1399 00:57:52,920 --> 00:57:54,590 - No, you can't argue with science. 1400 00:57:54,680 --> 00:57:56,220 Greenhouse gases are real. 1401 00:57:56,300 --> 00:57:58,720 - Did somebody say gases? 1402 00:57:58,800 --> 00:58:01,520 (Turk farting) 1403 00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:07,150 Hey, uh, what's your name, guy? 1404 00:58:07,230 --> 00:58:08,270 - Tim Ryder. 1405 00:58:08,360 --> 00:58:09,360 - Ride her? 1406 00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:10,900 I barely know her. 1407 00:58:10,980 --> 00:58:13,650 Check it out, I can fart your name. 1408 00:58:13,740 --> 00:58:16,030 (Turk farting) Tim Ryder. 1409 00:58:16,110 --> 00:58:17,450 - Hey, do you wanna get some fresh air? 1410 00:58:17,530 --> 00:58:18,620 - Let's get out of here. - Please. 1411 00:58:18,700 --> 00:58:20,080 Yeah. - What's the matter with you? 1412 00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:22,540 - Hey, where's everybody going? 1413 00:58:22,620 --> 00:58:23,620 - Whew! 1414 00:58:24,870 --> 00:58:26,960 What was up with that guy, amirite? 1415 00:58:27,040 --> 00:58:30,250 - Thought he was with you? - No, sort of. 1416 00:58:31,210 --> 00:58:33,840 - Sort of? - Not really. 1417 00:58:34,050 --> 00:58:37,220 - Was he or wasn't he? - Not really. 1418 00:58:38,010 --> 00:58:40,640 - Wow, indecisive and a liar. 1419 00:58:40,720 --> 00:58:42,810 Charming first qualities, goodnight. 1420 00:58:42,890 --> 00:58:44,180 - Okay, wait. 1421 00:58:44,270 --> 00:58:47,600 Okay, I admit, I used him as a diversion 1422 00:58:47,690 --> 00:58:49,480 so I could talk to you. 1423 00:58:49,560 --> 00:58:50,770 - Farting people's names? 1424 00:58:50,860 --> 00:58:52,110 Oh, that's quite the tactic. 1425 00:58:52,190 --> 00:58:54,070 - Oh, no, that part I didn't know. 1426 00:58:55,860 --> 00:58:59,070 - Okay, so you got me away from everybody. 1427 00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:00,410 What's your next move? 1428 00:59:02,030 --> 00:59:03,040 - Move? 1429 00:59:05,040 --> 00:59:07,660 - Look, um, what's your name? 1430 00:59:07,750 --> 00:59:08,710 - I'm Bob. 1431 00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:11,420 - Bob? - Yeah. 1432 00:59:13,340 --> 00:59:16,130 - Bob, I've been hit on by everybody 1433 00:59:16,210 --> 00:59:18,010 from doctors to lawyers. 1434 00:59:18,090 --> 00:59:20,800 Okay, I'm not looking for a booty call, 1435 00:59:20,890 --> 00:59:22,930 or a sexting daddy, friends with benefits. 1436 00:59:23,010 --> 00:59:25,930 - Oh no, I, I, I wasn't trying to be like- 1437 00:59:26,020 --> 00:59:29,140 - What? You just wanna get to know me? 1438 00:59:29,230 --> 00:59:31,940 Find out who I really am deep down inside? 1439 00:59:34,270 --> 00:59:35,780 I've heard it all before, Bob. 1440 00:59:35,860 --> 00:59:37,740 Not all women are as stupid and predictable 1441 00:59:37,820 --> 00:59:39,150 as you want them to be. 1442 00:59:39,990 --> 00:59:41,200 - Okay, all right, you know what? 1443 00:59:41,280 --> 00:59:43,240 You got me, you're 100% right. 1444 00:59:43,330 --> 00:59:45,700 You want me to be real? Let's be real. 1445 00:59:45,790 --> 00:59:47,160 I came in here tonight with the farting guy 1446 00:59:47,250 --> 00:59:49,250 so I could hit on smart girls like you, 1447 00:59:49,330 --> 00:59:51,040 and I used him as a diversion. 1448 00:59:52,460 --> 00:59:53,500 - A wingman, huh? 1449 00:59:54,500 --> 00:59:57,170 How pathetic are you? - I'm not pathetic. 1450 00:59:57,260 --> 01:00:00,760 I'm just a little lonely and a little hurt, 1451 01:00:00,840 --> 01:00:03,600 and sure I was trying to get a little action. 1452 01:00:03,680 --> 01:00:05,600 - Oh, and so now you've come clean, I'm what? 1453 01:00:05,680 --> 01:00:07,970 Supposed to like you for it? 1454 01:00:10,480 --> 01:00:13,690 ♪ To blame, love is just a game ♪ 1455 01:00:13,770 --> 01:00:15,650 - Have you ever been fly fishing? 1456 01:00:16,650 --> 01:00:18,690 'Cause I'd love to go fly fishing with you. 1457 01:00:18,780 --> 01:00:21,240 - Fly fishing? - Yeah. 1458 01:00:21,320 --> 01:00:24,240 - (laughs) Wait. 1459 01:00:24,320 --> 01:00:28,620 That has got to be the lamest pickup line ever. 1460 01:00:28,700 --> 01:00:30,580 Wow, fly fishing? 1461 01:00:30,660 --> 01:00:33,080 Oh, oh, oh gee. 1462 01:00:33,170 --> 01:00:34,580 Oh, you got me! 1463 01:00:36,500 --> 01:00:37,380 - Okay, wait. 1464 01:00:39,090 --> 01:00:40,420 I was hoping you could help me with this. 1465 01:00:40,510 --> 01:00:44,220 ♪ So you play it all again ♪ 1466 01:00:44,300 --> 01:00:47,310 - [Sarah] Hmm, nicely played, Bob. 1467 01:00:47,390 --> 01:00:48,180 Drink? 1468 01:00:50,350 --> 01:00:53,350 - The best way to get a smart chick is to- 1469 01:00:53,440 --> 01:00:57,110 - Let her think she's smarter than you. 1470 01:00:57,190 --> 01:00:59,860 (upbeat jazz music) 1471 01:00:59,940 --> 01:01:01,110 - Well, well, well. 1472 01:01:02,030 --> 01:01:04,820 If it isn't the world's sleaziest wingman. 1473 01:01:06,660 --> 01:01:07,660 - The Elk Room. 1474 01:01:08,950 --> 01:01:13,250 Let me guess, the old Rubik's, to get in her pubes, Cube. 1475 01:01:14,330 --> 01:01:15,790 Who's the client? 1476 01:01:15,880 --> 01:01:17,920 - Take a good look, Cow Tits. 1477 01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:21,130 (Bob and Sarah laughing) 1478 01:01:21,210 --> 01:01:22,130 (upbeat jazz music) 1479 01:01:22,220 --> 01:01:23,800 - Suck my sister's leg braces. 1480 01:01:23,880 --> 01:01:26,430 I think I know that kid. - Yeah, you do. 1481 01:01:27,680 --> 01:01:31,140 I'm getting my client, his fiance back, Sea Otter Balls. 1482 01:01:31,220 --> 01:01:32,890 - We'll see about that, Turk. 1483 01:01:33,560 --> 01:01:34,980 (tense music) 1484 01:01:35,060 --> 01:01:40,280 (clock bonging) (tense music) 1485 01:01:40,940 --> 01:01:43,030 (tense music) 1486 01:01:44,990 --> 01:01:48,030 - This has been a long time coming. 1487 01:01:48,120 --> 01:01:50,580 (tense music) 1488 01:01:53,750 --> 01:01:57,460 - When the clock chimes 10:30, we draw. 1489 01:01:57,540 --> 01:01:58,840 (tense music) 1490 01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:00,590 - Bring it, Cold Slaw Sack. 1491 01:02:00,670 --> 01:02:04,010 (tense music) (clock ticking) 1492 01:02:04,090 --> 01:02:06,760 (tense music) 1493 01:02:07,890 --> 01:02:09,220 (tense music) (clock ticking) 1494 01:02:09,300 --> 01:02:11,350 (tense music) 1495 01:02:11,430 --> 01:02:12,850 (tense music) (clock ticking) 1496 01:02:12,930 --> 01:02:17,520 (tense music) (toothpick whooshing) 1497 01:02:17,600 --> 01:02:22,360 (tense music) (clock ticking) 1498 01:02:22,440 --> 01:02:23,440 (clock bongs) 1499 01:02:23,530 --> 01:02:24,320 (head whooshing) 1500 01:02:24,400 --> 01:02:26,320 (tense music) 1501 01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:27,610 (toothpick whooshes) 1502 01:02:27,700 --> 01:02:29,780 (upbeat tense music) 1503 01:02:29,870 --> 01:02:31,580 (toothpick whooshes) 1504 01:02:31,660 --> 01:02:34,330 (tense music) 1505 01:02:41,250 --> 01:02:45,130 (cap squeaking and clicking) 1506 01:02:46,220 --> 01:02:49,470 (upbeat tense music) 1507 01:02:55,390 --> 01:02:57,100 (Eddie grunts and blows) 1508 01:02:57,190 --> 01:02:58,940 (Turk grunts) 1509 01:02:59,020 --> 01:03:00,150 - It burns. 1510 01:03:01,560 --> 01:03:02,570 It burns. 1511 01:03:03,320 --> 01:03:06,740 (Turk gasping faintly) 1512 01:03:10,950 --> 01:03:14,290 (gentle mellow music) 1513 01:03:17,370 --> 01:03:19,830 - There's two kinds of wingmen, Wingman. 1514 01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:22,840 Ones who can take the heat, 1515 01:03:22,920 --> 01:03:24,670 and the ones who fail their mission 1516 01:03:24,750 --> 01:03:27,760 and let life slap 'em in the face with its balls. 1517 01:03:27,840 --> 01:03:30,260 (gentle mellow music) 1518 01:03:30,340 --> 01:03:32,640 (balls whooshing) 1519 01:03:32,720 --> 01:03:33,810 (balls smacking face) 1520 01:03:33,890 --> 01:03:37,020 (Turk grunting) 1521 01:03:37,100 --> 01:03:39,850 (gentle music) 1522 01:03:44,020 --> 01:03:46,690 (Turk grunts) 1523 01:03:48,360 --> 01:03:49,650 - Daddy's home. 1524 01:03:49,740 --> 01:03:53,030 (upbeat tense music) 1525 01:03:54,870 --> 01:03:56,200 - No. 1526 01:03:56,290 --> 01:04:01,210 (toothpicks pecking) (Eddie grunting) 1527 01:04:01,710 --> 01:04:04,460 (Eddie thuds and grunts) 1528 01:04:04,540 --> 01:04:05,800 Oh, shit. 1529 01:04:05,880 --> 01:04:07,010 No. No. 1530 01:04:07,090 --> 01:04:12,300 (toothpick thuds) (Eddie grunts) 1531 01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:15,010 - Binjo, asshole. 1532 01:04:15,260 --> 01:04:16,350 (doors squeaking) 1533 01:04:16,560 --> 01:04:18,770 - On the floor now! 1534 01:04:22,150 --> 01:04:25,400 - Hey, hold on, Hawaii Five-O, show's over. 1535 01:04:25,480 --> 01:04:30,700 (spray hissing) (Turk groaning) 1536 01:04:31,610 --> 01:04:34,910 (car engine rumbling) 1537 01:04:34,990 --> 01:04:37,200 - Can't believe you know the guy that helped steal my fiance 1538 01:04:37,290 --> 01:04:39,000 and you didn't say anything! 1539 01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:40,460 - Just get me home, all right? 1540 01:04:40,540 --> 01:04:42,330 And be careful, I've never let anyone else 1541 01:04:42,420 --> 01:04:44,710 drive the orgasm-mobile before. 1542 01:04:44,790 --> 01:04:47,250 - Oh yeah? (tires squealing) 1543 01:04:47,340 --> 01:04:49,090 - Ah! 1544 01:04:49,170 --> 01:04:49,920 What the hell was that? 1545 01:04:50,010 --> 01:04:51,220 - That was a pothole! 1546 01:04:51,300 --> 01:04:52,680 Oh, look, another one coming up, 1547 01:04:52,760 --> 01:04:53,840 so you better start talking. 1548 01:04:53,930 --> 01:04:55,100 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. 1549 01:04:55,180 --> 01:04:57,310 No more potholes! - Who is he? 1550 01:04:58,390 --> 01:04:59,560 - All right. 1551 01:05:00,600 --> 01:05:03,480 He's a guy just like me, does what I do. 1552 01:05:03,560 --> 01:05:05,690 Look, I always have my client's back. 1553 01:05:05,770 --> 01:05:07,190 I always complete the mission. 1554 01:05:07,270 --> 01:05:09,440 - Oh, and you, you really had my back tonight, didn't you? 1555 01:05:09,530 --> 01:05:12,030 I mean, I finally had the perfect girl. 1556 01:05:12,110 --> 01:05:13,660 She was ready to come home and close the deal. 1557 01:05:13,740 --> 01:05:16,370 As stupid as your Rubik's Cube idea was, it worked. 1558 01:05:16,450 --> 01:05:19,540 But then you had to get all "Good, Bad, and Ugly" on us. 1559 01:05:19,620 --> 01:05:22,460 - Now settle down, we still got tomorrow. 1560 01:05:23,120 --> 01:05:24,330 Never lost a client yet. 1561 01:05:24,420 --> 01:05:26,790 Just get me home. 1562 01:05:28,000 --> 01:05:29,960 You there? - Of course, I'm here, Turk! 1563 01:05:30,050 --> 01:05:31,630 I'm still driving the car! 1564 01:05:31,710 --> 01:05:32,920 - Well, fucking talk to me! 1565 01:05:33,010 --> 01:05:35,590 What are you, side languaging me over there? 1566 01:05:35,680 --> 01:05:37,890 'Cause I can do it too! - Let's see it. 1567 01:05:39,260 --> 01:05:40,720 - You know what I just said? - What? 1568 01:05:40,810 --> 01:05:43,390 - "Fuck off," in seven languages! 1569 01:05:45,520 --> 01:05:48,520 There's eight, I just hit you with Chinese. 1570 01:05:48,610 --> 01:05:49,690 - All right, I wanna hear Jamaican. 1571 01:05:49,770 --> 01:05:50,900 It's impressive at this point. 1572 01:05:50,980 --> 01:05:52,900 - [Turk] To Bob-a-rasscrack, 1573 01:05:53,030 --> 01:05:56,780 better fuck off the papparasp, mon. 1574 01:05:57,700 --> 01:05:59,410 Here's one in English, fuck off. 1575 01:05:59,490 --> 01:06:03,660 ♪ I'll help you close your eyes ♪ 1576 01:06:04,460 --> 01:06:05,540 - [Turk] Bedroom's on the left. 1577 01:06:05,620 --> 01:06:09,340 ♪ And forget about to ♪ 1578 01:06:09,420 --> 01:06:13,590 - Yep, there you go. ♪ Day ♪ 1579 01:06:13,670 --> 01:06:15,090 - Listen, uh, 1580 01:06:15,180 --> 01:06:18,050 go into the kitchen and get me a rag for my eyes. 1581 01:06:19,050 --> 01:06:21,510 And there's a beer and cold cuts in the fridge 1582 01:06:21,600 --> 01:06:23,060 if you need a snack. 1583 01:06:25,140 --> 01:06:27,900 (gentle music) 1584 01:06:31,520 --> 01:06:34,440 - Nothing, just as I expected. 1585 01:06:34,530 --> 01:06:37,280 (gentle music) 1586 01:06:37,990 --> 01:06:42,330 Hmm. 1587 01:06:42,410 --> 01:06:43,410 Ice cream? 1588 01:06:44,700 --> 01:06:45,710 Okay. 1589 01:06:49,210 --> 01:06:51,590 Little salty, but that'll do. 1590 01:06:53,420 --> 01:06:55,630 (Turk grunts) 1591 01:06:55,720 --> 01:06:57,590 - Ah yeah. 1592 01:06:57,680 --> 01:06:58,840 Oh. 1593 01:06:58,930 --> 01:07:00,760 (Bob slurps) 1594 01:07:00,850 --> 01:07:03,930 (suspicious music) 1595 01:07:04,890 --> 01:07:06,640 - What the fuck is this, Turk? 1596 01:07:06,730 --> 01:07:08,390 Why is there a photo of you with the slime ball 1597 01:07:08,480 --> 01:07:09,730 from the bar tonight? 1598 01:07:11,560 --> 01:07:12,820 - Hey. 1599 01:07:12,900 --> 01:07:14,900 Hey, listen, you know what? 1600 01:07:14,980 --> 01:07:17,240 Why don't we just call tonight a write off, okay? 1601 01:07:17,320 --> 01:07:18,990 Look, I, I won't even charge you. 1602 01:07:19,070 --> 01:07:20,160 - Oh, you won't even charge me? 1603 01:07:20,240 --> 01:07:22,160 No, what the fuck is going on, Turk? 1604 01:07:22,240 --> 01:07:23,490 - I trained him. 1605 01:07:24,290 --> 01:07:26,200 - You, you trained the guy 1606 01:07:26,290 --> 01:07:28,000 who stole my fiance? - Yeah. 1607 01:07:28,080 --> 01:07:29,750 - This just keeps getting better. 1608 01:07:29,830 --> 01:07:31,960 - Yeah, look, relax, okay. 1609 01:07:32,040 --> 01:07:34,590 This gig is gonna put him out of business, 1610 01:07:34,670 --> 01:07:37,630 and I'm gonna be the only wingman on the block again. 1611 01:07:37,720 --> 01:07:41,390 - So, you've just been using me to get to this prick? 1612 01:07:41,470 --> 01:07:43,680 Is that what this has all been about? 1613 01:07:43,760 --> 01:07:44,760 - No. 1614 01:07:46,310 --> 01:07:47,600 Don't you see, kid? 1615 01:07:48,270 --> 01:07:49,600 It's about the money. 1616 01:07:51,600 --> 01:07:52,610 - Obviously. 1617 01:07:53,610 --> 01:07:54,690 Asshole. 1618 01:07:54,770 --> 01:07:57,490 (gentle music) 1619 01:07:59,240 --> 01:08:01,740 - [Newscaster] Reports have come in of enemy combatants 1620 01:08:01,820 --> 01:08:05,790 shooting an American jet fighter out of the sky. 1621 01:08:05,870 --> 01:08:07,330 - [Military Official] It's our belief 1622 01:08:07,410 --> 01:08:11,540 that Captain Scott Riker is still alive behind enemy lines. 1623 01:08:11,620 --> 01:08:14,000 - [Newscaster] Reports have come in of enemy combatants 1624 01:08:14,090 --> 01:08:17,960 shooting an American jet fighter out of the sky. 1625 01:08:18,050 --> 01:08:19,510 - [Military Official] It is our belief 1626 01:08:19,590 --> 01:08:24,010 that Captain Scott Riker is still alive behind enemy lines. 1627 01:08:24,100 --> 01:08:26,350 - Reports have come in of enemy combatants 1628 01:08:26,430 --> 01:08:29,140 shooting an American jet fighter out of the sky. 1629 01:08:29,220 --> 01:08:31,350 - It is our belief that Captain Scott Riker 1630 01:08:31,440 --> 01:08:34,690 is still alive behind enemy lines. 1631 01:08:34,770 --> 01:08:37,070 - [Newscaster] Reports have come in of enemy combatants 1632 01:08:37,150 --> 01:08:39,820 shooting an American jet fighter out of the sky. 1633 01:08:39,900 --> 01:08:40,860 - [Military Official] It is our belief 1634 01:08:40,950 --> 01:08:41,950 that Captain Scott Riker- 1635 01:08:42,030 --> 01:08:44,240 - What the hell are you doing in here? 1636 01:08:44,320 --> 01:08:46,530 - Don't worry, I was just leaving. 1637 01:08:46,620 --> 01:08:48,120 - Wait, wait, wait, wait. 1638 01:08:48,200 --> 01:08:50,000 Wait, wait, no, no, no. 1639 01:08:50,080 --> 01:08:54,080 Tomorrow night, 2100 hours, Pink Taboo. 1640 01:08:54,920 --> 01:08:56,920 Our final mission. - No, no, no. 1641 01:08:57,000 --> 01:08:58,920 Tonight was our final mission. 1642 01:08:59,010 --> 01:09:02,840 You delusional G.I. Joe fantasy boy. 1643 01:09:04,510 --> 01:09:06,010 You used me, Turk. 1644 01:09:06,970 --> 01:09:09,720 Yeah, and worst of all, 1645 01:09:09,810 --> 01:09:12,730 you're the reason I lost the love of my life. 1646 01:09:12,810 --> 01:09:16,230 - Oh, boo, hoo, hoo. 1647 01:09:16,310 --> 01:09:19,360 Like, you're the only one who's ever lost somebody, huh? 1648 01:09:21,150 --> 01:09:23,740 - You're a real piece of... 1649 01:09:27,530 --> 01:09:30,500 (gasps) I, I get it now. 1650 01:09:30,580 --> 01:09:32,870 I, I can't believe I didn't understand it. 1651 01:09:33,920 --> 01:09:36,040 Microscopes, beakers. 1652 01:09:37,090 --> 01:09:38,460 Crystal meth, how did I not see this before? 1653 01:09:38,540 --> 01:09:41,300 You're some kind of insane meth head, aren't you? 1654 01:09:41,380 --> 01:09:42,760 - It's not meth, shithead. 1655 01:09:42,840 --> 01:09:44,970 I told you, I brew my own gasoline. 1656 01:09:45,050 --> 01:09:48,220 Jesus, if you don't believe me, look for yourself. 1657 01:09:51,270 --> 01:09:54,230 (dramatic music) 1658 01:09:55,850 --> 01:09:57,440 - What the hell is this? 1659 01:09:58,690 --> 01:10:01,190 - Sperm cells. (chuckles) 1660 01:10:01,280 --> 01:10:04,320 They travel at about 100 million miles an hour 1661 01:10:04,400 --> 01:10:05,740 racing to the egg, 1662 01:10:05,820 --> 01:10:07,570 to the finish line. 1663 01:10:08,490 --> 01:10:10,910 It's like the Fallopian Tube 500 in there. 1664 01:10:12,160 --> 01:10:17,080 You know, if I could just catch that energy in a bottle. 1665 01:10:18,750 --> 01:10:21,130 - So wait, is, is this your- 1666 01:10:21,210 --> 01:10:22,840 - Pancake batter? 1667 01:10:22,920 --> 01:10:25,430 That's right. - Oh my god. 1668 01:10:25,510 --> 01:10:27,010 - Me and Betty like to have our fun, 1669 01:10:27,090 --> 01:10:30,350 but, uh, I don't like to waste anything. 1670 01:10:30,430 --> 01:10:34,180 - So you turn your spunk into gasoline? 1671 01:10:34,270 --> 01:10:35,350 - What do you think powers 1672 01:10:35,440 --> 01:10:37,520 the orgasm-mobile, Broccoli Teeth? 1673 01:10:37,600 --> 01:10:40,020 I didn't fill it up with Shell unleaded. 1674 01:10:40,110 --> 01:10:41,190 - What? 1675 01:10:41,270 --> 01:10:42,690 But, but that, that's impossible. 1676 01:10:42,780 --> 01:10:44,650 The sperm would die! 1677 01:10:44,740 --> 01:10:48,030 - No shit, genius, that's why I freeze it. 1678 01:10:48,110 --> 01:10:50,120 You ever heard of frozen sperm? 1679 01:10:50,200 --> 01:10:54,120 Keeps those pollywogs alive forever. (chuckles) 1680 01:10:54,200 --> 01:10:55,710 Until finally you defrost 'em, 1681 01:10:55,790 --> 01:10:58,460 and then they, they start squiggling around like you, 1682 01:10:58,540 --> 01:11:01,380 like you just squirted 'em out fresh. 1683 01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:05,470 (Bob gagging) 1684 01:11:09,930 --> 01:11:11,260 What the hell? 1685 01:11:11,970 --> 01:11:14,930 (Bob continues gagging) 1686 01:11:15,020 --> 01:11:16,060 My ice cream. 1687 01:11:16,140 --> 01:11:18,310 (Bob gags violently) 1688 01:11:18,390 --> 01:11:20,440 No wonder his breath smelled like a, 1689 01:11:22,190 --> 01:11:24,190 a George Michael youth camp. 1690 01:11:25,490 --> 01:11:26,440 - What if I blow it? - Come on, Bob. 1691 01:11:26,530 --> 01:11:27,780 You can do this. - Yeah. 1692 01:11:27,860 --> 01:11:29,070 Of course, you would say that. 1693 01:11:29,160 --> 01:11:30,320 But what if I can't? What if I can't do it? 1694 01:11:30,410 --> 01:11:31,780 What if I blow it? 1695 01:11:31,870 --> 01:11:32,830 - You're not gonna blow it. 1696 01:11:32,910 --> 01:11:33,830 Hey, hey. - I could blow it. 1697 01:11:33,910 --> 01:11:35,580 - Hey, hey, Maxine picked you, 1698 01:11:35,660 --> 01:11:37,500 because she knows you're the best. 1699 01:11:37,580 --> 01:11:40,580 (gentle music) 1700 01:11:40,670 --> 01:11:42,170 - Thanks, Holly, look, I couldn't have done 1701 01:11:42,250 --> 01:11:43,380 any of this without you. 1702 01:11:43,460 --> 01:11:45,590 Seriously, thanks, Holly. 1703 01:11:47,720 --> 01:11:49,840 - Good luck. - Thanks. 1704 01:11:49,930 --> 01:11:51,840 - Um, I'm meeting a friend for drinks 1705 01:11:51,930 --> 01:11:54,510 later at Rummy's if you wanna come. 1706 01:11:55,600 --> 01:11:57,480 We'll celebrate. - Yeah, we'll celebrate, 1707 01:11:57,560 --> 01:11:59,440 'cause great. - Yeah. 1708 01:11:59,520 --> 01:12:01,600 - At Rummy's, yeah, for sure. - Yeah. 1709 01:12:01,690 --> 01:12:03,360 Okay, go, go, go. - Oh, I gotta, yeah, yeah. 1710 01:12:03,440 --> 01:12:05,820 - Go. (audience clapping) 1711 01:12:05,900 --> 01:12:07,240 (audience continue clapping) 1712 01:12:07,320 --> 01:12:10,490 (suspenseful music) 1713 01:12:14,240 --> 01:12:17,870 My honored guests and esteemed colleagues, 1714 01:12:18,750 --> 01:12:20,540 it is my pleasure to be here today. 1715 01:12:23,380 --> 01:12:25,380 As you know, the global appetite 1716 01:12:25,460 --> 01:12:29,380 for world-class car racing is growing day by day. 1717 01:12:30,380 --> 01:12:33,390 Our vision at Raw Image is your vision, 1718 01:12:34,510 --> 01:12:37,600 to bring modernized, state-of-the-art racetracks 1719 01:12:38,430 --> 01:12:42,650 to that motherfucker right there! 1720 01:12:42,730 --> 01:12:43,980 - I'm a motherfucker? 1721 01:12:44,810 --> 01:12:45,980 You're a motherfucker! 1722 01:12:46,070 --> 01:12:48,070 - That's the fucker that stole my fiance! 1723 01:12:48,150 --> 01:12:49,740 - Then I'm a fiance fucker! - Oh, shit! 1724 01:12:49,820 --> 01:12:51,650 - Fucker! - I'm a fiance fucker! 1725 01:12:51,740 --> 01:12:53,160 And bring your mother, I will fuck her too! 1726 01:12:53,240 --> 01:12:54,620 - Oh, shit! (audience gasps) 1727 01:12:54,700 --> 01:12:58,580 (Kazzim speaking aggressively in foreign language) 1728 01:12:58,660 --> 01:13:02,080 - You son of a bitch! 1729 01:13:02,250 --> 01:13:03,500 (audience gasps) Oh, I'm gonna kill you! 1730 01:13:03,580 --> 01:13:05,710 - Son of a bitch, get off me, you hooker! 1731 01:13:05,790 --> 01:13:07,210 Bitch slap, man, you bitch! 1732 01:13:07,300 --> 01:13:08,800 Aye, you hit me! 1733 01:13:09,670 --> 01:13:10,840 - Oh my god. 1734 01:13:13,090 --> 01:13:16,010 I totally fucked this whole thing up completely. 1735 01:13:16,100 --> 01:13:17,680 Maxine is gonna be so pissed at me. 1736 01:13:17,970 --> 01:13:18,970 Shit. 1737 01:13:19,850 --> 01:13:21,140 - How could you know, Bob? 1738 01:13:21,230 --> 01:13:24,770 I mean, I would've done the same thing. 1739 01:13:26,270 --> 01:13:27,940 - Yeah, exactly, right? 1740 01:13:28,020 --> 01:13:29,320 You, you, you, think of it, 1741 01:13:29,400 --> 01:13:31,400 you came face to face with a broad 1742 01:13:31,490 --> 01:13:33,070 who stole Tim away from you. 1743 01:13:36,070 --> 01:13:37,330 - Well, um, 1744 01:13:38,280 --> 01:13:42,500 since we're talking about bad news here, um, 1745 01:13:43,620 --> 01:13:45,710 Tim and I broke up 1746 01:13:47,080 --> 01:13:48,170 a few months ago. 1747 01:13:51,670 --> 01:13:52,670 - Ugh. 1748 01:13:54,510 --> 01:13:57,140 I'm such an idiot. 1749 01:13:57,220 --> 01:13:58,550 A few months ago? 1750 01:13:58,640 --> 01:13:59,970 How did I not know? 1751 01:14:00,060 --> 01:14:03,480 - I, you were going through your own stuff, 1752 01:14:03,560 --> 01:14:05,520 and I don't know, I didn't wanna... 1753 01:14:07,270 --> 01:14:08,940 - Hey, come here. 1754 01:14:09,020 --> 01:14:11,230 (Bob hiccups) 1755 01:14:11,320 --> 01:14:14,110 Sorry. - It's okay. 1756 01:14:16,910 --> 01:14:19,870 - I'm such a selfish prick. 1757 01:14:19,950 --> 01:14:22,410 I've been in my own little world and I, I should've asked. 1758 01:14:22,500 --> 01:14:25,040 I should've... - Hey, it's okay. 1759 01:14:25,750 --> 01:14:27,670 I guess it was coming for a while. 1760 01:14:27,750 --> 01:14:28,960 You know, we were fighting, 1761 01:14:29,040 --> 01:14:31,710 and somehow he always made me feel like 1762 01:14:31,800 --> 01:14:33,460 I wasn't smart enough for him. 1763 01:14:34,170 --> 01:14:35,880 - You're not smart enough? 1764 01:14:35,970 --> 01:14:38,140 Holly McCarthy, not smart enough? 1765 01:14:39,100 --> 01:14:40,390 You work with me, don't you? (Holly chuckles) 1766 01:14:40,470 --> 01:14:43,020 Gotta be pretty smart. (chuckles) 1767 01:14:43,100 --> 01:14:45,310 Actually, I... 1768 01:14:47,690 --> 01:14:50,940 (key chain jingling) 1769 01:14:52,480 --> 01:14:53,940 Let's see how smart you are. 1770 01:14:54,030 --> 01:14:57,610 (gentle piano bar music) 1771 01:14:59,780 --> 01:15:00,830 (Bob hiccups) 1772 01:15:00,910 --> 01:15:03,120 (gentle piano bar music) 1773 01:15:03,200 --> 01:15:04,200 Ah. Oh. 1774 01:15:05,710 --> 01:15:08,540 (both laughing) 1775 01:15:11,090 --> 01:15:13,550 (gentle piano bar music) 1776 01:15:13,630 --> 01:15:15,380 See, you're plenty smart. 1777 01:15:15,460 --> 01:15:18,300 You're smart enough to get away from Tim. 1778 01:15:18,380 --> 01:15:21,970 (gentle piano bar music) 1779 01:15:22,050 --> 01:15:23,560 Oh, you know what? 1780 01:15:25,600 --> 01:15:27,060 I don't need this anymore. 1781 01:15:28,480 --> 01:15:29,730 You take it. 1782 01:15:29,810 --> 01:15:31,360 You know, here. 1783 01:15:32,730 --> 01:15:34,860 (key chain jingles) 1784 01:15:34,940 --> 01:15:35,940 It's yours. 1785 01:15:36,030 --> 01:15:39,070 (gentle piano bar music) 1786 01:15:39,160 --> 01:15:40,110 A toast. 1787 01:15:40,200 --> 01:15:43,530 (gentle piano bar music) 1788 01:15:43,620 --> 01:15:44,870 To new beginnings. 1789 01:15:46,540 --> 01:15:49,540 - To new beginnings. (glasses clinking) 1790 01:15:49,620 --> 01:15:52,380 (gentle music) 1791 01:16:04,260 --> 01:16:06,470 - Wow, look how much people love you. 1792 01:16:06,560 --> 01:16:08,270 Look at all this love. 1793 01:16:08,350 --> 01:16:10,350 Who got you all this stuff? 1794 01:16:10,440 --> 01:16:11,270 - I did. 1795 01:16:11,350 --> 01:16:13,900 (bed whirring) - Oh. 1796 01:16:13,980 --> 01:16:16,030 - Is this how you treat your clients? 1797 01:16:16,820 --> 01:16:18,400 By sending a date rapist? 1798 01:16:18,490 --> 01:16:19,820 - Oh, it wasn't a date rapist, honey. 1799 01:16:19,900 --> 01:16:21,530 It was an assault. 1800 01:16:21,610 --> 01:16:22,870 - What do you think a rapist is? 1801 01:16:22,950 --> 01:16:23,740 It's an assault. 1802 01:16:23,820 --> 01:16:25,240 And he called me a fucker! 1803 01:16:25,330 --> 01:16:26,450 - What can I do? 1804 01:16:26,540 --> 01:16:29,410 What can we do to make this right? 1805 01:16:29,500 --> 01:16:32,710 - Where I come from, we still believe in honor. 1806 01:16:32,790 --> 01:16:35,880 If the rapist comes forward and proves himself worthy, 1807 01:16:35,960 --> 01:16:37,960 I might show leniency. 1808 01:16:38,050 --> 01:16:39,630 - Of course, he will, no question. 1809 01:16:39,720 --> 01:16:41,840 He's one of our best rapist, I mean- 1810 01:16:41,930 --> 01:16:46,560 - I will send Bob over there tomorrow to heal this wound. 1811 01:16:46,640 --> 01:16:48,560 - No, you won't send him here. 1812 01:16:48,640 --> 01:16:51,480 Bob will show up and prove his honor 1813 01:16:51,560 --> 01:16:53,020 where real men prove it, 1814 01:16:53,100 --> 01:16:54,400 at the racetrack! 1815 01:16:54,480 --> 01:16:56,400 And, Doctor, get me a new bed, please! 1816 01:16:56,480 --> 01:16:58,190 I feel like I'm breakdancing! 1817 01:16:58,280 --> 01:17:00,320 I just sent you 50,000. 1818 01:17:00,400 --> 01:17:01,860 - Are those rupees? 1819 01:17:01,950 --> 01:17:03,240 - Yes, they're rupees. 1820 01:17:03,320 --> 01:17:05,740 That's a lot of money, in India. 1821 01:17:05,830 --> 01:17:06,620 Get me a bed. 1822 01:17:06,700 --> 01:17:09,500 (gentle music) 1823 01:17:14,710 --> 01:17:16,790 - Why have I never kissed you before? 1824 01:17:17,670 --> 01:17:20,550 - Well, uh, two reasons. 1825 01:17:21,220 --> 01:17:22,130 Tim. 1826 01:17:22,220 --> 01:17:23,090 - Mhmm. 1827 01:17:25,340 --> 01:17:27,100 - Terri. - Oh. 1828 01:17:28,060 --> 01:17:30,100 - Your fiance, remember? - I actually forgot 1829 01:17:30,180 --> 01:17:31,390 about her for a second. - Hmm. 1830 01:17:31,480 --> 01:17:32,940 - Yeah. 1831 01:17:33,020 --> 01:17:34,770 (gentle music) 1832 01:17:34,850 --> 01:17:36,310 Can I ask you a question? 1833 01:17:38,360 --> 01:17:41,780 Would you wanna go fly fishing with me sometime? 1834 01:17:43,570 --> 01:17:46,820 - I'd love that, Bob. - You would? 1835 01:17:46,910 --> 01:17:48,870 Yeah? Okay. - Yeah. 1836 01:17:48,950 --> 01:17:51,290 - Well, well, looks like I got here just in time. 1837 01:17:51,370 --> 01:17:53,370 - Sarah. (Bob sighs) 1838 01:17:53,460 --> 01:17:55,830 Hey, hi, oh, okay, this is Bob. 1839 01:17:55,920 --> 01:17:58,750 - Oh, I know who he is. - Oh. 1840 01:17:59,710 --> 01:18:00,500 Really? 1841 01:18:00,590 --> 01:18:03,050 - Yeah, we, um, 1842 01:18:03,130 --> 01:18:05,840 met at a function recently, right? 1843 01:18:05,930 --> 01:18:07,640 - Oh, right. 1844 01:18:07,720 --> 01:18:10,310 Yeah, you are the sleazy lowlife who thinks all women 1845 01:18:10,390 --> 01:18:12,180 are idiots and just put on this Earth 1846 01:18:12,270 --> 01:18:14,980 so that guys like you can get their rocks off. 1847 01:18:15,060 --> 01:18:16,730 - Sarah, no, no. 1848 01:18:16,810 --> 01:18:19,610 This is Bob Erdman, he's my boss. 1849 01:18:19,690 --> 01:18:23,240 - He's a pervert who hits on anything that moves. 1850 01:18:25,070 --> 01:18:27,160 - No, I'm sorry, you have the wrong guy. 1851 01:18:27,240 --> 01:18:28,240 - Really? 1852 01:18:29,330 --> 01:18:30,780 Has he asked you to go fly fishing with him yet? 1853 01:18:30,870 --> 01:18:33,330 In the mountains, just the two of you? 1854 01:18:35,120 --> 01:18:36,120 - Bob? 1855 01:18:37,290 --> 01:18:39,420 - Look, I could explain. 1856 01:18:39,500 --> 01:18:40,380 I was planning- 1857 01:18:40,460 --> 01:18:43,170 - What were you planning, Bob? 1858 01:18:43,260 --> 01:18:44,630 - To go fly fishing with you. 1859 01:18:44,720 --> 01:18:46,470 I want that, that was all me, what? 1860 01:18:46,550 --> 01:18:47,680 - [Sarah] Really? I don't believe it. 1861 01:18:47,760 --> 01:18:51,010 - Bob, were you just trying to use me? 1862 01:18:51,100 --> 01:18:52,220 - No, Holly, I swear to- 1863 01:18:52,310 --> 01:18:54,680 - Has he given you a Rubik's Cube yet? 1864 01:18:54,770 --> 01:18:55,560 (Holly gasps) 1865 01:18:55,640 --> 01:18:56,770 - It's not what you think. 1866 01:18:56,850 --> 01:18:59,610 - Oh, oh, oh, have you met the wingman? 1867 01:18:59,690 --> 01:19:01,980 Okay, he should be popping up here any second. 1868 01:19:02,070 --> 01:19:04,780 Now this guy, this guy, you gotta see to believe. 1869 01:19:04,860 --> 01:19:07,490 You know, he can fart people's names. 1870 01:19:09,530 --> 01:19:11,160 (Holly sighs) 1871 01:19:11,240 --> 01:19:15,080 - You know, I felt bad for you all these months 1872 01:19:15,160 --> 01:19:16,540 watching your heart break. 1873 01:19:16,620 --> 01:19:19,040 You seemed like a sincere guy 1874 01:19:19,120 --> 01:19:20,920 who was going through a lot of pain. 1875 01:19:21,000 --> 01:19:22,880 A guy who I thought was real 1876 01:19:22,960 --> 01:19:25,170 and who didn't deserve being dumped. 1877 01:19:25,260 --> 01:19:26,840 But Terri was smart. 1878 01:19:29,300 --> 01:19:32,760 Losing you was the best thing she could've done for herself. 1879 01:19:32,850 --> 01:19:36,600 (gentle solemn music) 1880 01:19:36,680 --> 01:19:39,140 You can take your stupid cube. 1881 01:19:40,100 --> 01:19:42,020 Why don't you put it on your fly line 1882 01:19:42,110 --> 01:19:44,230 and go fishing for someone else? 1883 01:19:44,320 --> 01:19:45,730 - No. 1884 01:19:45,820 --> 01:19:47,400 Holly! - Let's go, Sarah. 1885 01:19:47,490 --> 01:19:48,990 (gentle dramatic music) 1886 01:19:49,070 --> 01:19:52,280 - [Sarah] Fly fishing? You can do so much better. 1887 01:19:52,370 --> 01:19:56,000 (gentle piano bar music) 1888 01:19:57,370 --> 01:20:00,330 - Oh my god, what is this strange and colorful cube thingy? 1889 01:20:00,420 --> 01:20:03,420 (gasps) Is this the new iPhone 97? 1890 01:20:04,340 --> 01:20:05,250 - No. 1891 01:20:05,340 --> 01:20:08,260 (gentle piano bar music) 1892 01:20:08,340 --> 01:20:11,090 This is my fucked up life. 1893 01:20:11,180 --> 01:20:12,390 (key chain clinks into glass) 1894 01:20:12,470 --> 01:20:13,930 (gentle piano bar music) 1895 01:20:14,010 --> 01:20:14,970 - Excuse me for a second. 1896 01:20:15,060 --> 01:20:16,430 Okay, Bobby, holy crap. 1897 01:20:16,520 --> 01:20:18,850 I got the 4-1-1 on your mystery wingman. 1898 01:20:18,930 --> 01:20:20,690 - Oh, dude, no, that's old news now. 1899 01:20:20,770 --> 01:20:22,190 He's fucking done. 1900 01:20:23,360 --> 01:20:25,770 - Yeah, well good, because it turns out Mr. Wingman 1901 01:20:25,860 --> 01:20:27,360 was a real wingman. 1902 01:20:27,740 --> 01:20:28,320 - What? 1903 01:20:28,440 --> 01:20:31,280 - So dig this, he went over on a covert operation 1904 01:20:31,360 --> 01:20:32,870 over in Afghanistan or somewhere, 1905 01:20:32,950 --> 01:20:36,120 and things went wrong, real wrong. 1906 01:20:36,200 --> 01:20:37,580 - Whoa, whoa, back up. 1907 01:20:37,660 --> 01:20:40,370 Turk is a real pilot? - Was a real pilot. 1908 01:20:40,460 --> 01:20:42,250 He just lost his fighter. 1909 01:20:42,330 --> 01:20:44,790 There's only been one jet shot down in the region ever, 1910 01:20:44,880 --> 01:20:46,590 and guess who was supposed to be protecting him? 1911 01:20:46,670 --> 01:20:50,010 Turk fucking Thompson, your wingman. 1912 01:20:50,090 --> 01:20:51,720 - No shit. 1913 01:20:52,380 --> 01:20:53,800 - But here's the best part. 1914 01:20:53,890 --> 01:20:56,470 They've never found the pilot, he's MIA. 1915 01:20:57,930 --> 01:20:59,140 - So what are you saying? 1916 01:20:59,220 --> 01:21:00,480 They think he's still alive. 1917 01:21:00,560 --> 01:21:03,230 Holed up in some shitty foreign prison. 1918 01:21:03,310 --> 01:21:04,770 That son of a bitch, Thompson, 1919 01:21:04,860 --> 01:21:07,320 all that talk about completing the mission, 1920 01:21:07,400 --> 01:21:09,530 and he never even brought his own man back home. 1921 01:21:09,610 --> 01:21:10,740 What a jackass. 1922 01:21:11,990 --> 01:21:13,990 - No, Skip, you got it wrong. 1923 01:21:14,070 --> 01:21:15,410 I'm the jackass. 1924 01:21:16,490 --> 01:21:18,450 Take me to the Pink Taboo. 1925 01:21:18,540 --> 01:21:21,410 ♪ When I get to drinking ♪ 1926 01:21:21,500 --> 01:21:24,920 ♪ That's when I get to thinking ♪ 1927 01:21:25,000 --> 01:21:28,710 ♪ It's 'cause I ain't been thinking that I drink ♪ 1928 01:21:28,800 --> 01:21:29,760 - I fucked up. 1929 01:21:30,510 --> 01:21:32,010 It was me who trained Eddie. 1930 01:21:32,090 --> 01:21:35,010 But Eddie, he was a loose cannon. 1931 01:21:35,090 --> 01:21:37,550 That night, he didn't follow the pattern. 1932 01:21:38,390 --> 01:21:40,680 He compromised a formation and bang. 1933 01:21:42,890 --> 01:21:45,150 That's when Riker took the hit. 1934 01:21:45,230 --> 01:21:46,940 - So it wasn't your fault. 1935 01:21:47,020 --> 01:21:49,400 - Try telling that to Riker's family. 1936 01:21:49,480 --> 01:21:52,030 (upbeat music) 1937 01:21:54,820 --> 01:21:58,950 - So you trained Eddie as a wingman, not a wingman. 1938 01:21:59,030 --> 01:22:00,870 - Yeah, that's right. 1939 01:22:01,750 --> 01:22:03,210 - It's been 20 years, Turk, 1940 01:22:03,290 --> 01:22:05,210 and what have you been doing this whole time? 1941 01:22:05,290 --> 01:22:08,460 - Hanging out in places like this, drinking, 1942 01:22:11,960 --> 01:22:13,880 trying to forget Scott Riker. 1943 01:22:15,220 --> 01:22:17,340 But everywhere I look, I see his face. 1944 01:22:17,430 --> 01:22:20,760 (gentle mellow music) 1945 01:22:23,980 --> 01:22:27,520 I see his face on dumb shits like you, 1946 01:22:28,360 --> 01:22:30,770 guys that can't complete their missions, 1947 01:22:31,730 --> 01:22:33,150 who can't get laid. 1948 01:22:34,400 --> 01:22:37,450 I'm a wingman, that's what I do. 1949 01:22:38,450 --> 01:22:40,080 And I figure if I, 1950 01:22:40,160 --> 01:22:41,950 I save up enough dollars, 1951 01:22:43,790 --> 01:22:45,870 one day I could go back over there and 1952 01:22:50,840 --> 01:22:52,090 bring Scott Riker home. 1953 01:22:53,920 --> 01:22:55,720 - You really are a wingman. 1954 01:22:55,800 --> 01:22:57,630 - (laughs) Hell yeah, I am! 1955 01:22:57,720 --> 01:22:59,720 And, tonight, we're gonna crack your nuts 1956 01:22:59,800 --> 01:23:02,640 and get you laid! (laughs) 1957 01:23:03,680 --> 01:23:05,560 - Look, thanks, Turk. 1958 01:23:05,640 --> 01:23:06,390 But... 1959 01:23:06,480 --> 01:23:07,690 (Turk chuckles) 1960 01:23:08,690 --> 01:23:10,610 Here's the rest of what I owe you. 1961 01:23:11,400 --> 01:23:13,230 I'm sorry for all that's happened and 1962 01:23:14,030 --> 01:23:15,780 good luck with everything. 1963 01:23:15,860 --> 01:23:17,910 - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait a minute. 1964 01:23:17,990 --> 01:23:20,160 You still gotta get your girl back. 1965 01:23:20,240 --> 01:23:23,790 - No, I just came to apologize for what I said. 1966 01:23:24,200 --> 01:23:25,790 The mission's over, Wingman. 1967 01:23:27,920 --> 01:23:29,420 - Are you cereal? 1968 01:23:30,250 --> 01:23:31,250 - Yeah. 1969 01:23:33,380 --> 01:23:34,920 I am. 1970 01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:38,220 Maybe it's time to let the past go and move on. 1971 01:23:39,180 --> 01:23:40,590 ♪ Maybe ♪ 1972 01:23:40,680 --> 01:23:45,140 ♪ Then that'll stop you drinking, you old drunk ♪ 1973 01:23:45,220 --> 01:23:47,310 ♪ Maybe not ♪ 1974 01:23:47,390 --> 01:23:52,060 ♪ Blinkin', stinkin', drink, drank, drunk ♪ 1975 01:23:52,150 --> 01:23:54,480 (Eddie laughing) 1976 01:23:54,570 --> 01:23:56,490 - You thinking about leaving town? 1977 01:23:57,740 --> 01:23:59,200 Well, you probably should. 1978 01:24:00,410 --> 01:24:01,740 'Cause word on the street 1979 01:24:01,820 --> 01:24:04,280 is you failed in your mission last night, Fungus Face. 1980 01:24:07,370 --> 01:24:11,500 - How'd you find out so fast, Fart Festival Lips? 1981 01:24:11,580 --> 01:24:13,750 - News in our business travels fast. 1982 01:24:14,630 --> 01:24:15,840 It's a crazy world. 1983 01:24:15,920 --> 01:24:18,510 - Crazy like Forest Whitaker's left eye, 1984 01:24:19,760 --> 01:24:21,010 but I'll be all right. 1985 01:24:22,800 --> 01:24:24,810 - You lost your touch, Turk. 1986 01:24:24,890 --> 01:24:27,140 Maybe it's time you get out, hm? 1987 01:24:27,220 --> 01:24:29,730 - Like a retard in a bouncy house, 1988 01:24:30,940 --> 01:24:32,440 there is no getting out. 1989 01:24:33,610 --> 01:24:35,770 - You're like an old lady's tit, 1990 01:24:35,860 --> 01:24:37,820 all dried up just hanging around. 1991 01:24:39,030 --> 01:24:40,360 - What's to stop me right now 1992 01:24:40,450 --> 01:24:44,030 from shoving a giant pretzel so far up your ass 1993 01:24:44,120 --> 01:24:46,160 you think you have fallopian tubes? 1994 01:24:46,950 --> 01:24:48,160 - Because unlike you, 1995 01:24:49,120 --> 01:24:53,000 I have an employer who currently pays me. 1996 01:24:53,080 --> 01:24:56,420 (Eddie whooshing air) 1997 01:24:58,380 --> 01:25:00,220 (Eddie laughing) 1998 01:25:00,300 --> 01:25:03,050 (gentle music) 1999 01:25:14,900 --> 01:25:16,650 - Look, Holly, Bob was desperate. 2000 01:25:16,730 --> 01:25:17,900 You saw him. 2001 01:25:17,980 --> 01:25:21,320 - Hiring a wingman is more than desperate. 2002 01:25:21,400 --> 01:25:23,740 I didn't think he'd really do it. 2003 01:25:23,820 --> 01:25:25,660 Why didn't you tell me, Skip? 2004 01:25:25,740 --> 01:25:26,950 - He was crushed, Holly. 2005 01:25:27,030 --> 01:25:28,740 His fiance left a week before the wedding. 2006 01:25:28,830 --> 01:25:29,950 What would you have done? 2007 01:25:30,040 --> 01:25:31,250 - Where is he? 2008 01:25:31,330 --> 01:25:33,460 (upbeat suspenseful music) 2009 01:25:33,540 --> 01:25:35,380 Where is that son of a bitch? 2010 01:25:35,460 --> 01:25:38,250 - Who the hell are you? - Who the hell are you? 2011 01:25:38,340 --> 01:25:41,630 - Ah, shit, uh, this is, this is the wingman. 2012 01:25:41,720 --> 01:25:44,890 (suspenseful music) 2013 01:25:51,520 --> 01:25:52,980 - Everyone out! 2014 01:25:55,980 --> 01:25:57,190 Now! 2015 01:25:57,270 --> 01:26:02,360 (footsteps trampling) (employees murmuring) 2016 01:26:05,700 --> 01:26:07,200 (Holly sighs) 2017 01:26:07,280 --> 01:26:11,790 Okay, we are gonna have a little talk. 2018 01:26:11,870 --> 01:26:12,870 Me and you. 2019 01:26:15,120 --> 01:26:17,040 I wanna know everything. 2020 01:26:17,130 --> 01:26:20,170 (upbeat tense music) 2021 01:26:20,250 --> 01:26:21,380 Everything! 2022 01:26:21,460 --> 01:26:24,720 (upbeat tense music) 2023 01:26:25,720 --> 01:26:28,300 - My dear friends, welcome. 2024 01:26:28,390 --> 01:26:29,810 You know why you're here, 2025 01:26:29,890 --> 01:26:32,140 because you're all part of my inner circle. 2026 01:26:32,220 --> 01:26:33,600 - [Group] Mmm! 2027 01:26:33,680 --> 01:26:37,480 - You see, in my culture, business is important, 2028 01:26:37,560 --> 01:26:41,820 but not as important as honor and respect. 2029 01:26:43,110 --> 01:26:45,450 My multi-billion dollar vision 2030 01:26:45,530 --> 01:26:49,200 for car racing's future is here today. 2031 01:26:50,160 --> 01:26:52,870 And it must be earned, it must be won. 2032 01:26:52,950 --> 01:26:55,830 (everyone clapping) 2033 01:26:55,910 --> 01:26:58,290 - Let the race begin, motherbitches! 2034 01:26:58,380 --> 01:26:59,210 - Woo! - Yeah! 2035 01:26:59,290 --> 01:27:02,460 (everyone clapping) 2036 01:27:04,920 --> 01:27:07,010 - And that's all of it. 2037 01:27:07,930 --> 01:27:10,010 I put the dumb fuck up to everything. 2038 01:27:11,600 --> 01:27:13,470 Except for the fly fishing part, 2039 01:27:13,560 --> 01:27:15,060 that was all him. 2040 01:27:16,350 --> 01:27:18,650 - That was the part I love. 2041 01:27:18,730 --> 01:27:19,480 (Turk grunts) 2042 01:27:19,560 --> 01:27:22,770 (Turk pattering) 2043 01:27:22,860 --> 01:27:26,860 (Turk grunting and pattering) 2044 01:27:36,660 --> 01:27:41,250 - Look, you seem like a nice girl, hm? 2045 01:27:41,330 --> 01:27:45,210 Why don't you find somebody that's not so messed up? 2046 01:27:45,300 --> 01:27:46,380 I can help you. 2047 01:27:47,380 --> 01:27:50,010 What's your type? What are you, uh, Hindu? 2048 01:27:50,090 --> 01:27:51,430 Catholic? 2049 01:27:51,510 --> 01:27:52,510 - Quaker. 2050 01:27:55,640 --> 01:27:57,230 - Are you cereal? 2051 01:27:57,310 --> 01:27:59,810 - Excuse me. - Forget it. 2052 01:28:00,810 --> 01:28:02,610 He fired me. It's over. 2053 01:28:02,690 --> 01:28:04,320 - Mission failed? 2054 01:28:05,320 --> 01:28:07,030 - Mission aborted. 2055 01:28:07,110 --> 01:28:09,820 (gentle music) 2056 01:28:13,490 --> 01:28:16,660 (Turk spits toothpick) 2057 01:28:16,750 --> 01:28:18,000 - See you later, toots. 2058 01:28:18,080 --> 01:28:21,540 (gentle pleasant music) 2059 01:28:21,630 --> 01:28:23,590 Daddy's gotta ride. 2060 01:28:23,670 --> 01:28:27,170 (gentle pleasant music) 2061 01:28:32,140 --> 01:28:34,970 (tags jingling) 2062 01:28:37,350 --> 01:28:38,600 Hey! 2063 01:28:38,680 --> 01:28:40,940 Hey, pal, you dropped something. 2064 01:28:41,020 --> 01:28:43,230 - You keep it, you need it more than me. 2065 01:28:44,650 --> 01:28:46,320 (gentle mellow music) 2066 01:28:46,400 --> 01:28:48,740 You never leave a man behind, Wingman. 2067 01:28:49,490 --> 01:28:51,070 And I'm fucking cereal. 2068 01:28:52,110 --> 01:28:53,450 - Wait, wait, wait, wait! 2069 01:28:53,530 --> 01:28:56,870 (gentle mellow music) 2070 01:28:57,490 --> 01:29:01,250 (gentle mellow music ends) 2071 01:29:02,040 --> 01:29:04,670 - Please, choose your vehicle. 2072 01:29:05,500 --> 01:29:06,960 - No, I don't, I don't know how to race a car. 2073 01:29:07,050 --> 01:29:07,920 Let's just... 2074 01:29:08,300 --> 01:29:09,460 - Beat me in the race 2075 01:29:09,920 --> 01:29:11,130 and I'll sign the deal. 2076 01:29:11,220 --> 01:29:12,550 That's what you want, isn't it? 2077 01:29:12,630 --> 01:29:14,140 - Yeah, uh. 2078 01:29:19,430 --> 01:29:20,390 I'll tell you what, 2079 01:29:21,390 --> 01:29:23,810 since we're going for all the marbles here, 2080 01:29:23,900 --> 01:29:25,810 why don't you put something on the line? 2081 01:29:25,900 --> 01:29:28,190 Make it a little more worth my while, huh? 2082 01:29:28,820 --> 01:29:29,900 - There's honor in that. 2083 01:29:29,990 --> 01:29:30,940 More money? 2084 01:29:31,030 --> 01:29:33,700 - No, I'm thinking, Terri. 2085 01:29:34,160 --> 01:29:35,950 - What do you mean you're thinking Terri? 2086 01:29:36,030 --> 01:29:39,910 - Well, if I win, 2087 01:29:40,000 --> 01:29:42,040 you disappear, okay? 2088 01:29:42,120 --> 01:29:44,250 You break up with her, you leave, 2089 01:29:44,330 --> 01:29:46,330 and you let me have a fighting chance 2090 01:29:46,420 --> 01:29:47,920 of getting my girl back. 2091 01:29:48,840 --> 01:29:51,550 (Kazzim laughs) 2092 01:29:51,630 --> 01:29:52,670 - Sure, that sounds great. 2093 01:29:52,760 --> 01:29:54,180 Absolutely, no problem. 2094 01:29:54,260 --> 01:29:55,640 Yes, yeah, 2095 01:29:55,720 --> 01:29:57,850 'cause you have no bloody chance in hell to beat me. 2096 01:29:57,970 --> 01:30:01,100 So, please, select your vehicle. 2097 01:30:01,180 --> 01:30:02,100 - Uh, 2098 01:30:03,230 --> 01:30:03,980 I want- 2099 01:30:04,060 --> 01:30:07,560 (car horn honks a lively tune) 2100 01:30:07,650 --> 01:30:08,570 That one. 2101 01:30:08,650 --> 01:30:10,400 (upbeat rock music) 2102 01:30:10,480 --> 01:30:11,610 - That one? - Yeah. 2103 01:30:11,690 --> 01:30:13,740 (car engine rumbling) ♪ Wingman ♪ 2104 01:30:13,820 --> 01:30:15,860 - An old hot rod? - Yeah. 2105 01:30:15,950 --> 01:30:18,370 - You might as well drive a hot dog. (laughs) 2106 01:30:18,450 --> 01:30:20,910 You think a car made in 1932 2107 01:30:20,990 --> 01:30:23,830 is going to beat a car with all the newest technology? 2108 01:30:23,910 --> 01:30:25,920 - I don't know, but I want that one. 2109 01:30:26,000 --> 01:30:27,210 Okay, that's my car. 2110 01:30:27,290 --> 01:30:28,380 - Are you serious? 2111 01:30:28,460 --> 01:30:30,460 - Oh, I'm cereal. 2112 01:30:30,550 --> 01:30:32,300 - Be all the cereals you want. 2113 01:30:32,380 --> 01:30:34,550 Cocoa Puffs, Froot Loops, Frosted Flakes. 2114 01:30:34,630 --> 01:30:35,880 You are all of them. 2115 01:30:35,970 --> 01:30:37,640 Tony the Tiger, you're a Honeycomb. 2116 01:30:37,720 --> 01:30:38,760 - Okay. 2117 01:30:38,850 --> 01:30:40,930 - You are cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. 2118 01:30:41,010 --> 01:30:42,470 Follow my nose! 2119 01:30:42,560 --> 01:30:46,390 - (hiccups) Is it? Is there a bathroom here somewhere? 2120 01:30:48,440 --> 01:30:51,070 (Terri hiccupping) 2121 01:30:51,150 --> 01:30:52,360 - What the hell are you doing? 2122 01:30:52,440 --> 01:30:53,900 How'd you even find me? 2123 01:30:53,990 --> 01:30:57,360 - Look, I almost gave up on you, Dildo Tits. 2124 01:30:57,450 --> 01:31:00,370 But a true wingman never gives up on his mission. 2125 01:31:00,450 --> 01:31:03,080 Now it's time for you to make like Santa 2126 01:31:03,160 --> 01:31:06,290 and show the world you got a giant sack. 2127 01:31:07,790 --> 01:31:08,880 Jump in. 2128 01:31:08,960 --> 01:31:12,300 (inspirational music) 2129 01:31:15,720 --> 01:31:17,760 (car door thumps) 2130 01:31:17,840 --> 01:31:20,010 (Bob exhales) Now, 2131 01:31:20,100 --> 01:31:23,520 I didn't let any man ever ride with Betty before. 2132 01:31:24,180 --> 01:31:25,930 If you're gonna win this race, 2133 01:31:26,020 --> 01:31:27,690 you're gonna need the best motivation 2134 01:31:27,770 --> 01:31:29,810 on God's good, green Earth. 2135 01:31:29,900 --> 01:31:33,230 (whimsical music) 2136 01:31:33,320 --> 01:31:34,190 (Betty plops) 2137 01:31:34,280 --> 01:31:36,860 (whimsical music) - Wow. 2138 01:31:36,950 --> 01:31:37,950 - POP. 2139 01:31:39,160 --> 01:31:42,200 (arm whooshing) (ring twinkles) 2140 01:31:42,280 --> 01:31:43,950 - Power of the pussy. 2141 01:31:44,040 --> 01:31:45,790 - Binjo. 2142 01:31:45,870 --> 01:31:49,330 (car engine cranks and rumbles) 2143 01:31:49,420 --> 01:31:52,380 (upbeat rock music) 2144 01:31:55,380 --> 01:31:58,590 - You're going down, bitch. 2145 01:31:58,680 --> 01:32:00,220 (tires squealing) 2146 01:32:00,300 --> 01:32:03,430 Woo-hoo! 2147 01:32:03,510 --> 01:32:05,100 (cars whooshing) 2148 01:32:05,180 --> 01:32:08,770 ♪ Gonna ride my hot rod like an Arizona whore ♪ 2149 01:32:08,850 --> 01:32:12,980 (cars rumbling and whooshing) 2150 01:32:13,060 --> 01:32:17,190 - Turk, Turk, I don't know what to do! 2151 01:32:17,280 --> 01:32:19,610 - Stay focused, Erdman, you got this! 2152 01:32:19,700 --> 01:32:20,820 ♪ Got the need for speed ♪ 2153 01:32:20,910 --> 01:32:25,040 ♪ Take the foot up off the brake ♪ 2154 01:32:25,120 --> 01:32:26,950 - Hello, hello, is somebody here? 2155 01:32:27,040 --> 01:32:28,620 ♪ First comes gear one ♪ 2156 01:32:28,710 --> 01:32:30,460 ♪ Then comes gear two ♪ 2157 01:32:30,540 --> 01:32:31,670 ♪ Shift it into third ♪ 2158 01:32:31,750 --> 01:32:33,500 - Whoa! Hey! 2159 01:32:33,590 --> 01:32:36,210 - We're moving now! Woo-hoo! 2160 01:32:36,300 --> 01:32:37,880 - Turk, he's going too fast! 2161 01:32:37,960 --> 01:32:39,130 - Just breathe, Erdman. 2162 01:32:39,220 --> 01:32:40,800 Listen to my voice. 2163 01:32:40,880 --> 01:32:42,340 - Gotcha. - Straighten her out. 2164 01:32:42,430 --> 01:32:45,430 (tires squealing) 2165 01:32:46,930 --> 01:32:51,440 - Now, punch it like a drunk stepfather teaching his kids 2166 01:32:51,520 --> 01:32:55,190 that the world ain't all horses and clowns! 2167 01:32:55,270 --> 01:32:56,440 (tires squealing) 2168 01:32:56,520 --> 01:32:57,570 - Yeah-he-he-he-ah! 2169 01:32:57,650 --> 01:33:01,070 (Terri gagging loudly) 2170 01:33:02,490 --> 01:33:03,870 (tires squealing) 2171 01:33:03,950 --> 01:33:05,450 (Kazzim laughing maniacally) 2172 01:33:05,530 --> 01:33:07,200 (tires squealing) - No! 2173 01:33:07,290 --> 01:33:09,950 - Next time don't bring a Tonka toy to a turbo party! 2174 01:33:10,040 --> 01:33:11,460 - I like my men hairy. 2175 01:33:11,540 --> 01:33:13,210 ♪ Wingman ♪ 2176 01:33:13,290 --> 01:33:14,880 ♪ Wingman ♪ 2177 01:33:14,960 --> 01:33:15,880 - He passed me, Turk! 2178 01:33:15,960 --> 01:33:17,050 - Take it to the left. 2179 01:33:17,130 --> 01:33:18,510 - What do I do? 2180 01:33:18,590 --> 01:33:20,550 - And then, slide her up the middle and try to get home 2181 01:33:20,630 --> 01:33:22,130 before you go diarrhea. 2182 01:33:22,220 --> 01:33:24,260 (car engines rumbling) 2183 01:33:24,340 --> 01:33:25,720 (Terri burping) 2184 01:33:25,800 --> 01:33:27,060 - Oh, that felt good. 2185 01:33:27,140 --> 01:33:28,850 (car engines rumbling) 2186 01:33:28,930 --> 01:33:29,890 - Turk! 2187 01:33:29,970 --> 01:33:31,480 Turk, I don't know what to do, man! 2188 01:33:31,560 --> 01:33:35,400 - POP, baby. ♪ You gotta shoot your shot ♪ 2189 01:33:35,480 --> 01:33:36,690 - Power of the pussy. 2190 01:33:36,770 --> 01:33:38,860 - Talk dirty to her. 2191 01:33:38,940 --> 01:33:41,030 I showed you what to do. 2192 01:33:41,110 --> 01:33:43,070 (car engines rumbling) 2193 01:33:43,150 --> 01:33:46,740 - Yeah, that's right, my little licorice whip. 2194 01:33:46,830 --> 01:33:49,410 Ooh, you like when I fondle you like that? 2195 01:33:49,490 --> 01:33:51,700 Ooh, you're firmer than I thought. 2196 01:33:51,790 --> 01:33:54,250 Maybe I'll get one a little lower. 2197 01:33:54,330 --> 01:33:56,630 Oh, not that hole, hoo-hoo-hoo. 2198 01:33:56,710 --> 01:33:58,630 Let me get you a little wet, yeah. 2199 01:33:58,710 --> 01:34:00,510 You ready for me? 2200 01:34:00,590 --> 01:34:02,590 Mm, 'cause I'm ready for you. 2201 01:34:02,670 --> 01:34:03,510 (button clicks) (car engine revs) 2202 01:34:03,590 --> 01:34:04,300 Whoa! 2203 01:34:04,380 --> 01:34:05,430 (car engine rumbles) 2204 01:34:05,510 --> 01:34:06,680 Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 2205 01:34:06,760 --> 01:34:08,220 - [Kazzim] (indistinct) Koala! 2206 01:34:08,300 --> 01:34:11,470 (energetic music) 2207 01:34:11,560 --> 01:34:13,230 (Butterbuns chattering) 2208 01:34:13,310 --> 01:34:14,940 (car engine rumbling) 2209 01:34:15,020 --> 01:34:16,440 (Bob laughing loudly) 2210 01:34:16,520 --> 01:34:17,860 (car engines rumbling) 2211 01:34:17,940 --> 01:34:19,940 - Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 2212 01:34:20,860 --> 01:34:21,940 We passed him! 2213 01:34:22,030 --> 01:34:24,400 I passed him, Turk, I'm gonna win! 2214 01:34:24,490 --> 01:34:28,120 - Drive like your mother's chasing you to boarding school! 2215 01:34:29,080 --> 01:34:29,830 Drive! 2216 01:34:29,910 --> 01:34:32,000 (energetic music) 2217 01:34:32,080 --> 01:34:33,620 - I'm gonna win! 2218 01:34:33,710 --> 01:34:35,210 I'm gonna win! 2219 01:34:35,290 --> 01:34:36,210 I won! 2220 01:34:36,290 --> 01:34:37,290 We did it! 2221 01:34:38,000 --> 01:34:39,540 - Rubber tire's coming in hot! 2222 01:34:39,630 --> 01:34:44,840 - Oh, tires! Oh, no! (dramatic music) 2223 01:34:45,380 --> 01:34:46,800 (dramatic music ends) 2224 01:34:46,890 --> 01:34:50,390 (gentle pleasant music) 2225 01:34:53,430 --> 01:34:55,520 - Welcome, come in. 2226 01:34:55,600 --> 01:34:56,480 We've been waiting for you. 2227 01:34:56,560 --> 01:34:59,270 - [Bob] Uh, am, am I in heaven? 2228 01:34:59,360 --> 01:35:02,440 - Hell, you won, kid, (chuckles) 2229 01:35:02,530 --> 01:35:04,150 but you had a little accident. 2230 01:35:04,240 --> 01:35:05,400 You hit pretty hard. 2231 01:35:05,490 --> 01:35:06,990 - What? 2232 01:35:07,070 --> 01:35:08,910 What the hell is on my face, Turk? 2233 01:35:08,990 --> 01:35:10,910 - Picture a pug 2234 01:35:10,990 --> 01:35:14,250 that's been smacked in the face with a canoe paddle. 2235 01:35:14,330 --> 01:35:15,330 - What? 2236 01:35:17,460 --> 01:35:18,630 Oh! 2237 01:35:18,710 --> 01:35:20,500 Is that Betty? 2238 01:35:20,590 --> 01:35:21,590 Ow! What? 2239 01:35:22,590 --> 01:35:24,670 - Some of your teeth are cracked. 2240 01:35:24,760 --> 01:35:27,510 Betty's the only thing holding everything together. 2241 01:35:28,590 --> 01:35:30,510 It's time your victory speech, champ. 2242 01:35:30,600 --> 01:35:33,770 (audience clapping) 2243 01:35:34,600 --> 01:35:36,060 - Thank you, boob. 2244 01:35:36,140 --> 01:35:38,270 - Have you been getting lip injections? 2245 01:35:39,270 --> 01:35:41,360 - You won an incredible race. 2246 01:35:41,440 --> 01:35:43,690 You're quite a racist. (chuckles) 2247 01:35:43,780 --> 01:35:46,070 (audience clapping) 2248 01:35:46,150 --> 01:35:47,110 - There's something stuck in your lip. 2249 01:35:47,200 --> 01:35:48,320 - No. - Is that corn? 2250 01:35:48,400 --> 01:35:49,530 What is that? Let me get it. 2251 01:35:49,610 --> 01:35:51,370 What is that? 2252 01:35:51,450 --> 01:35:52,370 - No, no, no, no. 2253 01:35:52,490 --> 01:35:54,580 (clears throat) That's, 2254 01:35:54,660 --> 01:35:56,370 that's my clit. - What? 2255 01:35:56,450 --> 01:35:58,920 - Also, congratulations on winning 2256 01:35:59,000 --> 01:36:02,130 one of the most beautiful women in the world, Terri. 2257 01:36:03,130 --> 01:36:05,170 - What the hell is he talking about? 2258 01:36:05,250 --> 01:36:06,460 Bob? 2259 01:36:06,550 --> 01:36:07,880 - It's, um, 2260 01:36:08,550 --> 01:36:09,800 you know what? 2261 01:36:12,350 --> 01:36:14,680 Uh, (clears throat) look, 2262 01:36:15,520 --> 01:36:19,140 a few months ago, my life was in complete order. 2263 01:36:19,810 --> 01:36:22,980 Good job, gorgeous wife to be. 2264 01:36:23,820 --> 01:36:25,940 I thought I had everything figured out. 2265 01:36:27,530 --> 01:36:29,400 But then a good, good friend of mine 2266 01:36:29,490 --> 01:36:31,660 taught me that in the blink of an eye 2267 01:36:31,740 --> 01:36:34,370 your life can go into a tailspin and change. 2268 01:36:35,620 --> 01:36:38,580 And if you're not ready for it, you can lose everything, 2269 01:36:38,660 --> 01:36:41,710 and, more importantly, everyone that matters. 2270 01:36:41,790 --> 01:36:43,710 (gentle music) 2271 01:36:43,790 --> 01:36:46,710 Terri, you're a great girl, 2272 01:36:46,800 --> 01:36:48,550 my little songbird. 2273 01:36:48,630 --> 01:36:51,550 (Bob sputtering) 2274 01:36:55,560 --> 01:36:58,060 (audience clapping) 2275 01:36:58,140 --> 01:37:02,190 But I see now that Terri left for a reason. 2276 01:37:02,270 --> 01:37:03,440 You see, in every relationship, 2277 01:37:03,520 --> 01:37:05,060 if you're not each other's wingman 2278 01:37:05,150 --> 01:37:08,650 or wingwoman, then who has your back? 2279 01:37:08,740 --> 01:37:11,030 Who helps you get through every damn day 2280 01:37:11,110 --> 01:37:13,110 avoiding those tailspins? 2281 01:37:14,200 --> 01:37:16,990 I can see now that I blew it. 2282 01:37:17,700 --> 01:37:18,950 I took my eye off the mission 2283 01:37:19,040 --> 01:37:21,410 and I wasn't that guy for you, Terri. 2284 01:37:23,120 --> 01:37:25,420 But I can see Kazzim makes you happy. 2285 01:37:27,710 --> 01:37:31,300 Hell, one more kiss for old time's sake? 2286 01:37:32,220 --> 01:37:35,050 (lips smacking) 2287 01:37:36,640 --> 01:37:39,890 (Terri gags faintly) 2288 01:37:42,270 --> 01:37:43,850 (Terri spits) 2289 01:37:43,940 --> 01:37:48,320 With that being said, I did still win that race. 2290 01:37:48,400 --> 01:37:50,990 And, Kazzim, as a man of great honor, 2291 01:37:51,070 --> 01:37:55,200 I ask that you consider changing the prize. 2292 01:37:55,280 --> 01:37:57,700 - You won fair and square, whatever you want. 2293 01:37:58,490 --> 01:37:59,950 - Then for my prize, 2294 01:38:00,660 --> 01:38:02,910 I ask that you help my friend 2295 01:38:03,000 --> 01:38:07,590 locate Captain Scott Riker and bring him home. 2296 01:38:07,670 --> 01:38:08,920 - Consider it done. 2297 01:38:09,000 --> 01:38:11,880 - Suck my saliva glands. (audience clapping) 2298 01:38:11,960 --> 01:38:14,590 - [Terri] A prize? - A wingman is born. 2299 01:38:14,680 --> 01:38:16,140 - [Terri] Fuck all you men! 2300 01:38:16,220 --> 01:38:19,100 - [Kazzim] Terri, come back, please, my little muffin top! 2301 01:38:19,180 --> 01:38:20,390 Terri! - Hey! 2302 01:38:21,350 --> 01:38:23,940 So you're the scumbag that hired Eddie. 2303 01:38:24,020 --> 01:38:25,520 - You see me as a scumbag? 2304 01:38:25,600 --> 01:38:27,190 - Where are you from? - India. 2305 01:38:27,270 --> 01:38:28,730 - What part? - Downtown. 2306 01:38:28,820 --> 01:38:30,360 - What street? - Elliot Road. 2307 01:38:30,440 --> 01:38:32,650 - What number? - 37. 2308 01:38:32,740 --> 01:38:35,240 - I'm watching you. - I watched you. 2309 01:38:35,320 --> 01:38:38,830 - I'm watching you even more. - Look at me watch you. 2310 01:38:38,910 --> 01:38:40,240 Watch. (watch ticking) 2311 01:38:40,330 --> 01:38:41,620 Edward, let's go. 2312 01:38:43,290 --> 01:38:47,500 - Hey, this isn't over, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Face. 2313 01:38:48,750 --> 01:38:50,800 - I'm watching you too, Eddie. 2314 01:38:50,880 --> 01:38:52,050 - Watch away. 2315 01:38:52,130 --> 01:38:54,260 - I am. - Pay-per-view. 2316 01:38:55,380 --> 01:38:57,260 - [Kazzim] Terri, come back! 2317 01:38:57,340 --> 01:38:59,350 ♪ American girl ♪ 2318 01:38:59,430 --> 01:39:02,770 ♪ I got a message ♪ 2319 01:39:02,850 --> 01:39:06,690 ♪ That she's back in town ♪ 2320 01:39:06,770 --> 01:39:10,060 ♪ She'd really like to see me ♪ 2321 01:39:10,150 --> 01:39:13,070 ♪ Am I still around ♪ 2322 01:39:13,150 --> 01:39:16,860 ♪ Really, really sorry and she'd like to talk ♪ 2323 01:39:16,950 --> 01:39:20,410 ♪ Must wanna tell me why she took that walk ♪ 2324 01:39:20,490 --> 01:39:24,120 ♪ Took a little while, but I'm back in stride ♪ 2325 01:39:24,200 --> 01:39:29,420 ♪ Finally realized you just can't hide ♪ 2326 01:39:30,330 --> 01:39:31,920 - Come on, let's go jump in the boat. 2327 01:39:32,000 --> 01:39:33,750 ♪ I love ♪ 2328 01:39:33,840 --> 01:39:35,760 ♪ American girls ♪ ♪ Nothing like ♪ 2329 01:39:35,840 --> 01:39:38,760 ♪ American ♪ 2330 01:39:38,840 --> 01:39:40,300 ♪ Girls ♪ 2331 01:39:40,390 --> 01:39:41,260 (Bob grunts) 2332 01:39:41,350 --> 01:39:43,850 (both breathing heavily) 2333 01:39:43,930 --> 01:39:44,930 - Wow! 2334 01:39:45,850 --> 01:39:48,850 (both exhaling deeply) 2335 01:39:48,940 --> 01:39:52,230 So, Turk told you everything? 2336 01:39:52,320 --> 01:39:53,150 - Everything. 2337 01:39:53,230 --> 01:39:56,400 - Oh, no! (both laughing) 2338 01:39:56,490 --> 01:39:58,860 - I guess I should apologize for those rat traps. 2339 01:39:58,950 --> 01:40:00,990 - (laughs) You think? Yeah. 2340 01:40:02,240 --> 01:40:04,620 (Bob exhales deeply) 2341 01:40:04,700 --> 01:40:06,410 It's weird, in a way, 2342 01:40:07,460 --> 01:40:09,580 I actually helped him complete his mission, 2343 01:40:09,670 --> 01:40:12,920 but he didn't help me complete mine. 2344 01:40:13,000 --> 01:40:14,130 I'm the first guy 2345 01:40:14,210 --> 01:40:17,090 he's never actually successfully got a girl. 2346 01:40:19,970 --> 01:40:22,510 - Oh, I wouldn't be so sure about that. 2347 01:40:22,600 --> 01:40:25,010 - (chuckles) Oh yeah? 2348 01:40:25,100 --> 01:40:26,020 Why is that? 2349 01:40:26,100 --> 01:40:28,890 (upbeat music) 2350 01:40:30,560 --> 01:40:32,900 - I have my eight reasons. 2351 01:40:32,980 --> 01:40:35,570 - He told you about the onion rings? 2352 01:40:35,650 --> 01:40:37,240 - I think actually nine. 2353 01:40:38,240 --> 01:40:39,280 - Maybe it's 10. 2354 01:40:39,360 --> 01:40:41,490 (both laughing) 2355 01:40:41,570 --> 01:40:43,320 ♪ I love ♪ 2356 01:40:43,410 --> 01:40:45,950 ♪ American girls ♪ 2357 01:40:46,040 --> 01:40:48,580 (upbeat music) 2358 01:40:50,750 --> 01:40:52,380 - I wonder where he is now. 2359 01:40:52,460 --> 01:40:55,040 (upbeat music) 2360 01:40:56,750 --> 01:40:58,590 - (exhales) He's on a mission. 2361 01:40:59,550 --> 01:41:04,640 (person chanting) (machine guns pattering) 2362 01:41:06,470 --> 01:41:09,020 - [Turk] Hey! 2363 01:41:09,100 --> 01:41:09,980 Ooh. 2364 01:41:10,060 --> 01:41:13,940 (Turk grunting and pattering) 2365 01:41:16,860 --> 01:41:18,860 (toothpick whooshes) 2366 01:41:18,940 --> 01:41:21,570 (body thuds) 2367 01:41:22,450 --> 01:41:24,620 Captain Scott Riker. 2368 01:41:24,700 --> 01:41:27,910 (gentle thrilling music) 2369 01:41:27,990 --> 01:41:29,120 - What took you so long, 2370 01:41:29,200 --> 01:41:30,540 you son of a bitch? 2371 01:41:30,620 --> 01:41:34,170 (gentle thrilling music) 2372 01:41:38,380 --> 01:41:40,340 - It's time to go home, Captain. 2373 01:41:40,420 --> 01:41:42,380 - Home? 2374 01:41:42,470 --> 01:41:43,470 Screw that. 2375 01:41:44,890 --> 01:41:47,180 I've been locked up in here for 18 years. 2376 01:41:48,970 --> 01:41:51,430 Take me to a bar, Wingman. 2377 01:41:51,520 --> 01:41:53,060 I need to get laid, 2378 01:41:54,150 --> 01:41:55,690 and that's an order. 2379 01:41:55,770 --> 01:41:59,070 (gentle thrilling music) 2380 01:42:02,700 --> 01:42:03,950 - Ah! 2381 01:42:04,030 --> 01:42:05,110 Ha-ha! 2382 01:42:05,200 --> 01:42:10,040 (energetic music) (dancers cheering) 2383 01:42:24,220 --> 01:42:29,430 (energetic music continues) (dancers continue cheering) 2384 01:42:30,680 --> 01:42:35,560 ♪ So what's a man, without a woman ♪ 2385 01:42:35,650 --> 01:42:40,190 - (grunts) Oh, that was incredible. 2386 01:42:41,360 --> 01:42:43,150 Oh, wow. 2387 01:42:44,360 --> 01:42:47,530 The way you just bend me like, 2388 01:42:48,200 --> 01:42:49,120 like a tree branch, 2389 01:42:49,200 --> 01:42:51,540 and then just snap me right back 2390 01:42:51,620 --> 01:42:55,210 like you just found the second cure to polio. 2391 01:42:56,170 --> 01:42:57,120 Oh! 2392 01:42:57,210 --> 01:43:01,420 ♪ And we love because we're lovers ♪ 2393 01:43:03,210 --> 01:43:04,470 - You're a beast. ♪ Tell your daughters ♪ 2394 01:43:04,550 --> 01:43:07,800 ♪ To be strong ♪ 2395 01:43:07,890 --> 01:43:09,140 (Butterbuns inhaling) - Mhmm. 2396 01:43:09,220 --> 01:43:11,390 ♪ 'Cause what's a man ♪ (Butterbuns exhaling) 2397 01:43:11,470 --> 01:43:14,640 ♪ Without a woman ♪ 2398 01:43:14,730 --> 01:43:16,770 ♪ Mm ♪ 2399 01:43:16,850 --> 01:43:20,150 - Where do I ever find a man that can beat that? 2400 01:43:20,230 --> 01:43:22,650 (Butterbuns pattering) 2401 01:43:22,730 --> 01:43:23,650 What's that? 2402 01:43:23,730 --> 01:43:26,990 (mellow soulful music) 2403 01:43:27,070 --> 01:43:28,570 Oh. 2404 01:43:28,660 --> 01:43:30,200 Ooh. 2405 01:43:30,280 --> 01:43:31,280 Okay. 2406 01:43:33,080 --> 01:43:34,250 "Wingman. 2407 01:43:34,330 --> 01:43:37,000 If you don't get laid, I don't get paid." 2408 01:43:37,080 --> 01:43:38,290 (Butterbuns pattering) 2409 01:43:38,370 --> 01:43:41,500 (chuckles) Well, what have I got to lose? 2410 01:43:42,920 --> 01:43:45,170 - You ready for round 12, baby? 2411 01:43:46,340 --> 01:43:47,720 - Fuck yeah! - Fuck ya? 2412 01:43:47,800 --> 01:43:50,390 I barely no ya. 2413 01:43:50,470 --> 01:43:53,390 (Terri laughing) 2414 01:43:54,890 --> 01:43:58,020 (upbeat rock music) 2415 01:43:59,100 --> 01:44:01,360 (balloons popping) 2416 01:44:01,440 --> 01:44:03,610 - Hey, pal, who do you think you are? 2417 01:44:05,440 --> 01:44:07,280 - Turk Thompson. - Give me that. 2418 01:44:08,400 --> 01:44:09,820 Wingman? 2419 01:44:09,910 --> 01:44:15,120 What kind of moron hires a wingman? (scoffs) 2420 01:44:15,490 --> 01:44:16,580 Loser-ville. 2421 01:44:16,660 --> 01:44:19,670 (ladies laughing) 2422 01:44:21,750 --> 01:44:23,920 - I'll call ya. - Yeah. 2423 01:44:24,000 --> 01:44:25,340 I know. 2424 01:44:25,420 --> 01:44:29,840 In the meantime, take these motion sickness pills. 2425 01:44:29,930 --> 01:44:33,050 I want you to start practicing on your mattress, 2426 01:44:33,140 --> 01:44:35,310 humping it like a boarding school pervert 2427 01:44:35,390 --> 01:44:36,770 caught in an Arizona shitstorm. 2428 01:44:36,850 --> 01:44:38,850 ♪ What you gonna do ♪ 2429 01:44:38,930 --> 01:44:40,730 - [Character] Hey, where you going, baby? 2430 01:44:40,810 --> 01:44:42,230 Come back. - Loser. 2431 01:44:42,310 --> 01:44:43,860 ♪ Look around the room ♪ 2432 01:44:43,940 --> 01:44:45,230 (Butterbuns pattering) (Butterbuns farts) 2433 01:44:45,320 --> 01:44:46,650 - Brush teeth. 2434 01:44:47,990 --> 01:44:50,400 (toothbrush swishing) 2435 01:44:50,490 --> 01:44:51,280 (Butterbuns pattering) 2436 01:44:51,360 --> 01:44:52,950 Nature's answer. 2437 01:44:53,030 --> 01:44:55,410 ♪ Wingman, wingman ♪ 2438 01:44:55,490 --> 01:44:56,330 - Yeah. 2439 01:44:56,410 --> 01:44:58,950 - All clean and ready to cream. 2440 01:44:59,040 --> 01:45:00,870 (Butterbuns farts) 2441 01:45:00,960 --> 01:45:02,750 (toilet flush whooshing) 2442 01:45:02,830 --> 01:45:03,670 ♪ Wingman ♪ 2443 01:45:03,750 --> 01:45:07,590 ♪ Wingman, wingman ♪ 2444 01:45:07,670 --> 01:45:11,590 ♪ He drives up to the bar as your hopes begin to fade ♪ 2445 01:45:11,680 --> 01:45:13,090 - [Character] I have my own car. 2446 01:45:13,180 --> 01:45:14,930 I promise. - (chuckles) You wish. 2447 01:45:15,010 --> 01:45:18,560 ♪ Now he don't get paid if he don't get you laid ♪ 2448 01:45:18,640 --> 01:45:22,100 - [Wingman] Come on, show Daddy some lettuce. 2449 01:45:22,190 --> 01:45:25,940 ♪ He'll get you what you want, skinny, fat, or tall ♪ 2450 01:45:26,020 --> 01:45:29,150 - [Wingman] Oh, looking juicy. - Oh. 2451 01:45:29,240 --> 01:45:33,570 ♪ But you better hurry up, they just yelled, "Last call" ♪ 2452 01:45:33,660 --> 01:45:36,830 - Naked body shots! - Woo-hoo! 2453 01:45:36,910 --> 01:45:38,410 ♪ Strike out number four ♪ 2454 01:45:38,490 --> 01:45:40,450 ♪ Strike out number five ♪ 2455 01:45:40,540 --> 01:45:45,710 ♪ Totally rejected, chances barely alive ♪ 2456 01:45:47,710 --> 01:45:51,550 ♪ He'll get you hooked up with a brunette or a blonde ♪ 2457 01:45:51,630 --> 01:45:54,930 - Ooh, release the Kracken. (date laughing) 2458 01:45:55,010 --> 01:45:58,220 ♪ You're going home with a hottie, now the wingman's done ♪ 2459 01:45:58,310 --> 01:46:01,980 ♪ Wingman, wingman ♪ 2460 01:46:02,060 --> 01:46:03,640 ♪ If you can't get a date ♪ 2461 01:46:03,730 --> 01:46:05,730 ♪ He's always got a plan ♪ 2462 01:46:05,810 --> 01:46:07,190 ♪ No time left waiting ♪ 2463 01:46:07,270 --> 01:46:09,110 ♪ He's the wingman ♪ 2464 01:46:09,190 --> 01:46:12,820 ♪ Wingman, wingman ♪ 2465 01:46:12,900 --> 01:46:16,450 ♪ Wingman, wingman ♪ 2466 01:46:16,530 --> 01:46:19,160 - [Wingman] I'm the wingman. 2467 01:46:19,240 --> 01:46:20,240 Yeah. 2468 01:46:21,370 --> 01:46:22,830 - [Date] (giggling) You're cute. 2469 01:46:22,910 --> 01:46:26,080 - Are you cereal? (date laughs) 2470 01:46:26,170 --> 01:46:29,750 ♪ His love is just a game ♪ 2471 01:46:29,840 --> 01:46:35,050 ♪ All the pain driving you insane ♪ 2472 01:46:35,970 --> 01:46:40,390 ♪ Insane, it gets inside your brain ♪ 2473 01:46:41,390 --> 01:46:45,690 ♪ It stains, sucks you down its drain ♪ 2474 01:46:46,520 --> 01:46:50,110 ♪ Its drain, love is just a game ♪ 2475 01:46:58,120 --> 01:47:01,450 ♪ Love is just a game ♪ 2476 01:47:08,210 --> 01:47:13,380 ♪ No matter how you plan ♪ 2477 01:47:13,960 --> 01:47:18,640 ♪ Or craft a strategy ♪ 2478 01:47:19,300 --> 01:47:24,220 ♪ Once you're in the game ♪ 2479 01:47:24,810 --> 01:47:29,360 ♪ You are never free ♪ 2480 01:47:29,440 --> 01:47:34,610 ♪ You play it all again ♪ 2481 01:47:35,490 --> 01:47:38,820 ♪ Love is just a game ♪ 2482 01:47:40,990 --> 01:47:43,490 (firework whooshing) 2483 01:47:43,580 --> 01:47:45,080 (firework pops) 2484 01:47:45,160 --> 01:47:48,460 (logo whooshes) 2485 01:47:48,540 --> 01:47:52,130 (gentle sparkling music)