1
00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:36,359
<i>So, stick with me here.</i>

2
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:39,319
<i>I know y'all came to see
a comedy about the Blacks,</i>

3
00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:42,074
<i>everyone's favorite family
with the perfect daughter</i>

4
00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:44,470
<i>that somehow survived Terror Night.</i>

5
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:49,598
<i>You didn't sign up to see
some Egyptians open an evil box</i>

6
00:00:49,680 --> 00:00:52,957
<i>and a bat flap his ass
across an Indiana Jones map.</i>

7
00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:55,680
<i>Trust me,
it'll all make sense later.</i>

8
00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:58,239
<i>Well, since we last met,</i>

9
00:00:58,320 --> 00:01:00,789
<i>Dad wrote a bestseller
based on Terror Night.</i>

10
00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:05,397
<i>But then Dad and Cronut blew that money
faster than a rapper at a strip club.</i>

11
00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:08,598
<i>We're back in Atlanta.</i>

12
00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:10,034
<i>And Dad's writin' the sequel,</i>

13
00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:12,839
<i>and we were just getting used
to being back home</i>

14
00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:16,197
<i>when this very bat flew into our fives.</i>

15
00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:18,317
<i>Seriously, pray for us, y'all.</i>

16
00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:07,800
<i>We're back
on the GGN News Network.</i>

17
00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:10,520
<i>I'm your host with the most,
Finding Nemo, aka Nemo Hoser.</i>

18
00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:12,830
<i>Today on my show,
I got a very special quest,</i>

19
00:02:12,920 --> 00:02:17,357
<i>the one and only, the author Carl Black
in the motherfucking house.</i>

20
00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:18,589
<i>Mr. Black, what's happening?</i>

21
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,478
<i>Snoop! How are you, man?</i>

22
00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:22,268
<i>I'm good, Carl.
How you doin' today, brother?</i>

23
00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,874
<i>I'm excited, man.
I got this new book coming out.</i>

24
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,759
<i>It's called</i> Terror Night.
<i>Mm. I wrote it.</i>

25
00:02:27,840 --> 00:02:29,877
<i>It's from my heart.
This is my baby.</i>

26
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,752
<i>What makes this book a great read</i>

27
00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:33,920
<i>for the average nigga
sitting at home doing nothing?</i>

28
00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:38,079
<i>You know, most Black people
know about terror.</i>

29
00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:39,788
<i>Mr. Black, I'm forced
to tell you the truth.</i>

30
00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:41,916
<i>It is an easy read.
Real easy.</i>

31
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:43,479
<i>What you mean by that?</i>

32
00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:46,069
<i>"There was a Black man that."</i>

33
00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:47,639
<i>That's bullshit, Snoop.</i>

34
00:02:47,720 --> 00:02:49,320
<i>Go get my book.
It's called Terror Night.</i>

35
00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:52,948
<i>All right. All right. All right.
That's enough Terror Night.</i>

36
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,388
<i>All right. All right.
All right. Thank you.</i>

37
00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:56,516
<i>Now we got a real guest
coming up on the show.</i>

38
00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:59,069
<i>Make some noise for the one and only
Matt Bares.</i>

39
00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:01,028
<i>Snoop, what's going on, man?
Thanks for having me.</i>

40
00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:02,155
<i>Matt!</i>

41
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:03,992
<i>- Who's that?</i>
- Terror Night.

42
00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:06,560
<i>- Ah, this is Carl Black.
- This book is J... Carl Black, man.</i>

43
00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:08,477
<i>You know me.
I wrote</i> Terror Night.

44
00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:10,188
<i>- You read that book?
- The book is crazy.</i>

45
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:11,599
<i>You're gonna love it, man.
And...</i>

46
00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:12,750
<i>That book was terrible.</i>

47
00:03:12,840 --> 00:03:14,188
<i>One of the worst books I ever read.</i>

48
00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:16,481
<i>You must be havin' a bad day today.
It's a good book, man.</i>

49
00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:18,631
<i>- Nah. It's just a bad book.
- Hey, you should...</i>

50
00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:20,751
<i>- Fuck you.
- Fuck you and that book.</i>

51
00:03:20,840 --> 00:03:22,960
<i>I'm gonna get the fucking fuck.</i>

52
00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:25,679
<i>That nigga's excited.</i>

53
00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:44,354
<i>Okay.
Just don't. Here.</i>

54
00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:10,280
Hey.

55
00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:12,360
Hey!

56
00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:15,758
Hey!

57
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:16,955
What are you doin?

58
00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:20,590
We're practicing for the Migos' tour.
The streets need us.

59
00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:22,079
The streets don't need yo ass.

60
00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:24,674
And stop makin' all that damn noise.

61
00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:26,433
- Frickin' old guys!
- And stop playing!

62
00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:27,560
Again from the top. Ready?

63
00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:30,794
I'm gonna kick your ass.

64
00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:32,359
Give me the phone!
Cut if off!

65
00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:34,954
- Dad, come on.
- Cut it off! I'm trying to write.

66
00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,200
You messed it up again! I bet...

67
00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:40,428
Go.

68
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:42,192
- Daddy, get out! Out.
- Hey!

69
00:04:42,280 --> 00:04:43,628
Girl, you better stop throwin' shit.

70
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:46,359
- Go! Shut up!
- I peed in that bed last night.

71
00:04:57,520 --> 00:04:59,431
You know, I didn't escape the Purge

72
00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:01,670
so somebody would be breakin'
in my fuckin' house!

73
00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:19,234
Hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey!
Man, come on, bro.

74
00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:21,834
- What's wrong with you?
- Come on, bro.

75
00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:24,673
- Goddamn!
- What's wrong with you?

76
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,199
Goddamn. Why are you so jumpy?

77
00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:29,398
Yeah, 'cause maybe somebody tried to break
in my house and kill me before.

78
00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:31,508
What you doin' creepin' around my house
this late at night?

79
00:05:31,520 --> 00:05:34,114
The lights in the RV went out.
I had to get some flashlights.

80
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,077
- Some flashlights?
- Not just flashlight.

81
00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:37,992
Purge lights!
You feel me?

82
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:39,957
You know about these.
Did I tell you about 'em?

83
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:42,148
You don't need no battery.
That means you crank it right up.

84
00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:43,708
- Just like this.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, man.

85
00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:44,755
- What? What?
- Hey, hey.

86
00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:47,514
Get rid of that janky shit!
Stop orderin' it.

87
00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:49,637
Y'all run around here ballin'
and spendin' money,

88
00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:54,191
leavin' the lights on, runnin' water,
like there's money growin' on the tree.

89
00:05:54,280 --> 00:05:55,360
I don't have no more money.

90
00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:56,908
'Cause you ain't selling no goddamn books.

91
00:05:56,920 --> 00:05:59,799
If you sell some goddamn books,
we can goddamn sell these bitches.

92
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:03,038
- And why're you broke? Huh?
- Get your ass out of here.

93
00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:06,909
Hey, man. What the fuck, man?
Stop holding me like a side bitch.

94
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,108
- What's you tripping off of?
- This is the reason right here.

95
00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:11,077
'Cause I can't imagine

96
00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:14,790
why I let you talk me into spending
my money on this shit.

97
00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:16,480
It's all part of the business plan, cuz.

98
00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:19,797
No, no, no. The business plan
is the reason why Lorena is out

99
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,713
busting her ass to wipe my old ass.

100
00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:26,270
Don't nobody want to hear about me
moving back into my old neighborhood

101
00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:28,560
while my cousin livin' in an RV
in the back of my house.

102
00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,751
What the fuck is going on over there, man?

103
00:06:32,840 --> 00:06:34,592
Some crackheads.

104
00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:36,353
Next door at the old Marsten house.

105
00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:37,919
They must be squattin' or somethin'.

106
00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:39,788
<i>- Go for dispatch...</i>
- Nah. They live there.

107
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:44,317
I seen 'em move in, but the crazy part is
all the windows are boarded.

108
00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:46,710
They only come out at nighttime.

109
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:50,117
Yeah. Who would move in a place
with a house that's boarded up like that?

110
00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:52,191
And when did they move in?

111
00:06:52,280 --> 00:06:54,590
- Yeah. They got in like a week ago.
- What the fuck?

112
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:57,188
<i>- Snitch, Snitch, where you at?</i>
- Yeah. I watched 'em do it.

113
00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,191
They moved in, man.

114
00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:01,157
I see everything.

115
00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,959
I know you with the neighborhood watch
and everything, but man...

116
00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:05,553
it's getting a little creepy, man.

117
00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:06,789
All right, ladies, in we go.

118
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:08,279
Your coupe is here.

119
00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:10,112
- Did you hear that?
- Shh...

120
00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:11,674
That's some crazy shit.

121
00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:22,716
Somethin' strange goin' on in that house.

122
00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:31,395
I'm gone.

123
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:43,876
<i>You will be mine...</i>

124
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,917
<i>unconditionally.</i>

125
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:58,949
Baby, I think some new people
just moved in next door.

126
00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:01,913
Oh, baby.
Leave those people alone, babe.

127
00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:04,190
Go back to sleep.

128
00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:23,718
This refrigerator's filthy!

129
00:08:25,720 --> 00:08:27,791
- Appreciate shit.
- Ahem.

130
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,519
What are you doing here, Cronut?

131
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:32,080
I had to get some milk for my cereal.

132
00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:34,350
I ran out in the RV.

133
00:08:34,440 --> 00:08:35,714
The door's locked for a reason.

134
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:37,788
Who messed up that damn toilet?

135
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:39,632
Hey, what the fuck you doin' in here?

136
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:41,480
Eating breakfast.
What it look like I'm doin?

137
00:08:41,560 --> 00:08:43,028
You ain't supposed
to be here in the mornings.

138
00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:44,428
You told me I could
come in on Tuesdays.

139
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:45,560
I'm about sick of your shit.

140
00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:47,597
It's liquid.

141
00:08:47,680 --> 00:08:49,548
Stay out of the toilet.

142
00:08:49,560 --> 00:08:51,468
You know there's a serial killer
living next door.

143
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,596
God, this boy run
his damn mouth too much.

144
00:08:53,680 --> 00:08:56,752
Hey, Carl, Carl.
Check this shit out, bro.

145
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,672
<i>...the death of Chante Webster.</i>

146
00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:02,071
<i>Her badly mutilated corpse
was found inside a dumpster</i>

147
00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:06,233
<i>behind Gus's Chicken and Waffles
on Indian Hill Road.</i>

148
00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:07,948
They found that body
right around the comer.

149
00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:09,028
<i>This is the sixth incident</i>

150
00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:12,670
<i>in a vicious string
of kidnappings and murders,</i>

151
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:17,231
<i>all of which were
either African-American or Mexican.</i>

152
00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:19,880
<i>Racially motivated? Perhaps.</i>

153
00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:22,759
This is exactly why we need to move out
of this neighborhood.

154
00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:24,751
- Move? Again?
- Yes, move.

155
00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:26,353
And when we say "move,"

156
00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:29,114
- that means us.
- Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin?

157
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:30,918
Uh, hey... hey.
No thinkin' for you, okay?

158
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,399
What about what we saw last night?

159
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:34,312
Okay, I don't have time for this, Carl.

160
00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:36,828
I got to go to work. I'm going to be
working a double tonight,

161
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:38,274
so you're on your own for dinner.

162
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:41,159
What about what we seen
with the neighbors, bro?

163
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:44,634
You better do what she say.

164
00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:45,790
Fuck you up.

165
00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,439
She payin' the bills around here.

166
00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:50,319
Hey, babe. Don't pay
no attention to Cronut.

167
00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:51,953
He's just a dumb-ass.

168
00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:53,997
He's a neglected Chihuahua.

169
00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:55,115
Carl, I'm not happy here.

170
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:57,953
- Listen...
- This was supposed to be temporary, Carl.

171
00:09:58,040 --> 00:09:59,360
We were supposed to be here

172
00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:01,192
- until you got your money going...
- Money.

173
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:04,079
- ...you wrote your book.
- It's gonna work.

174
00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:06,470
That developer came
around again the other day.

175
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:09,712
He can make us a really good offer
on your mom's house.

176
00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,757
We can move to a safer place.

177
00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:14,918
I can be happy.
Happy wife, happy what?

178
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,116
- Happy wife.
- Happy life.

179
00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,271
The guy's a fuckin' vulture. Okay?

180
00:10:19,360 --> 00:10:20,919
He wants to move in this neighborhood

181
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,753
so he can take it over and tum it
into a fuckin' strip mall.

182
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,956
Do you understand what I'm sayin'? Okay?

183
00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:27,713
It's called... it's called gingivitis.

184
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:29,154
Gentrification!

185
00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:30,240
Shut up, Cronut!

186
00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:31,754
Stupid dumb-ass nigga.

187
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,560
Once we move out of here, who cares
what they do to the neighborhood?

188
00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,553
Just promise me that today you're going
to look at this and consider it.

189
00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:39,313
I'm... I'm gonna think about it.

190
00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:41,198
I appreciate it.

191
00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:42,509
<i>Up next,</i>

192
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:47,356
<i>I survived a hammer to the head
and a boot to the face.</i>

193
00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:49,548
Somethin' fucked-up went down
in that house last night.

194
00:10:49,560 --> 00:10:50,788
You think that was a dead body?

195
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:51,800
Would you stop?

196
00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:55,390
It's already hard enough you got
all this crazy shit in my wife's head.

197
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:58,552
And no! I did not see a body.

198
00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:01,234
I think my first instinct is like,
there's dead body in there.

199
00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,880
But... Oh, there's a nice one over there.

200
00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:18,240
No.

201
00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:23,998
Hey, hey, hey! No!

202
00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:27,476
Why you cock-blocking? She need me.
This could be my old lady, man.

203
00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:30,313
- She's already married.
- You know I've been in the penitentiary.

204
00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:31,708
- Let me just live, brother.
- Okay.

205
00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:35,918
You've been to prison two years ago
for 10 days for drinkin' and drivin'.

206
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:37,718
And you're a "gangster drinker."

207
00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:40,188
I'm just gonna go over there and just...
Just rap a tad to her.

208
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,840
- I'm gonna go. What's up, baby?
- Cronut.

209
00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:46,592
He about to shoot
that midget sperm in that girl.

210
00:11:46,680 --> 00:11:48,432
Bunny! Shit.

211
00:11:48,560 --> 00:11:50,597
Baby, I told you, you got to get
a new wheelchair.

212
00:11:50,680 --> 00:11:52,717
- You got new wheelchair money?
- Ugh!

213
00:11:53,720 --> 00:11:55,199
- I'm sorry, Bunny.
- It's okay.

214
00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:56,475
I didn't mean to snap at you.

215
00:11:56,560 --> 00:11:58,468
If my penis worked,
I'd make love to you right now.

216
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,268
- I'd hit it from the back.
- I know you would.

217
00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:02,476
Marky Mark style
from <i>Boogie Nights.</i>

218
00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:04,551
Hey! Stay off my property!

219
00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:05,755
What's up, Clive?

220
00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:08,960
Shouldn't you be makin' up some bullshit
or whatever else you do you call work?

221
00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:13,273
You know my husband don't like you guys
comin' over here.

222
00:12:13,360 --> 00:12:14,509
But I like seein' you guys.

223
00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:15,668
What you been up to?

224
00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:19,435
You been rollin' around this neighborhood
or you just been kickin' it around?

225
00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:22,680
- Funny, motherfucker!
- Kickin' it!

226
00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:24,910
What are you doing,
writin' your next bestseller?

227
00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,469
Who're you trying to be?
New Alex Haley?

228
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:31,309
Steve Harvey? You gonna try to make
a book into a movie?

229
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:34,472
You see <i>Think Like a Man?
Think Like a Man 2?</i> Sucked!

230
00:12:35,480 --> 00:12:37,630
<i>Pootie Tang</i> blew those two out the water.

231
00:12:37,720 --> 00:12:41,839
Okay, yeah, I'm writin' a book.
When is your next marathon, huh?

232
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,309
You gonna help me tend to my garden?

233
00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,152
I'll tend the shit out of that garden.

234
00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:48,880
Tend more than the garden.
I will bend you over in there. I mean...

235
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:50,189
So, I have carrots.

236
00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:52,476
I got a carrot. With a fat head.

237
00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:53,788
What's up with that house right there?

238
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:55,837
What's up with them people
that live in there?

239
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,759
I know you can't see
with them thick-ass glasses.

240
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:01,120
- You know what these eyes have seen?
- Yeah, these nuts.

241
00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:02,480
I've been in three wars.

242
00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:04,348
- How you think I got Bunny?
- The government.

243
00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:06,520
That little check you get every month,
she's takin' it.

244
00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:08,398
- I saw into her soul.
- Damn.

245
00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:11,268
I see that little man right there with
the 8th-grade body talkin' to my wife.

246
00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:13,508
You don't think I see that?
I saw you catch gonorrhea, baby...

247
00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:14,788
You better watch your fuckin' mouth!

248
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,468
- Watch your mouth, man!
- I wish you would.

249
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:17,908
I wish you...
I've been waiting on this.

250
00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:19,588
Why would you kick me in the leg

251
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:22,433
- where I can't feel it?
- I know you can't can't feel it.

252
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,708
Come on. You ain't the first Black guy
I got in a fight with.

253
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:26,791
I can't feel my legs, Carl.
Hit me in the face.

254
00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:29,270
You little bitch.

255
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:31,078
All day, every day.

256
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:34,073
Listen, man. Somethin' ain't right
at that house, Carl.

257
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:35,468
They moved in the middle of night.

258
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:37,790
There's never any movement during the day.

259
00:13:37,920 --> 00:13:39,868
- Yeah.
- Lazy shits won't answer the door,

260
00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:40,950
had a package dropped off.

261
00:13:41,040 --> 00:13:45,034
Mailman brought it over to me,
sittin' on the front porch right now.

262
00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:48,112
Hey, Bunny! Come get
that package from Africa!

263
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:49,200
Hey, Bunny!

264
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:51,231
Get that package
over there on the back porch.

265
00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:53,028
- I wouldn't. I wouldn't.
- You might get on...

266
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:54,800
- You feel that, Carl?
- Okay. Let my arm go.

267
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:57,748
- Let my arm go.
- Let my cousin... aw!

268
00:13:57,760 --> 00:13:58,795
- It fucking hurts.
- Hey.

269
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:00,791
Let it go!
That shit hurt.

270
00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:02,440
Dang, you got some upper body strength.

271
00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:05,111
There it is.
Look at that... Africa.

272
00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:07,111
Africa. Wrapped in velvet.

273
00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:18,232
I'm gonna take it over there myself.

274
00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,755
Cronut... Cronut!

275
00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:22,757
Why you give him the fuckin' package?!

276
00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:26,191
It's like we're living across the street
from <i>Diff'rent Strokes.</i>

277
00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:27,190
Hey, hey, hey.

278
00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:28,628
- Give me the package, man.
- What the shit?

279
00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:29,869
Cronut!

280
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,476
See? You happy?

281
00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:37,828
You got me runnin' around here,
fightin' motherfuckers and shit...

282
00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:41,310
- I can't do this, man.
- Fuck this, I gotta find out.

283
00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:44,512
- Hey, hey, hey...
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, my ass.

284
00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:45,670
Get it. Get it.

285
00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:05,679
What can I do to... I mean,
for you, gentlemen?

286
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:07,308
Nigga, we saw you transporting
dead bodies last night.

287
00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:09,391
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, man.
Shut the fuck up.

288
00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:10,311
We did.

289
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:13,358
You did not see me
transport any dead bodies.

290
00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:16,114
We standin' in front of a chocolate
vampire-type nigga.

291
00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:19,636
Sir, and this my little cousin, Cronut,
he's a little retarded.

292
00:15:19,720 --> 00:15:21,428
- Slow as fuck.
- He needs special attention.

293
00:15:21,440 --> 00:15:23,113
He's on Ritalin, prednisone,

294
00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:24,588
- and all kind of shit.
- Everything.

295
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,989
This is Dr. Mamuwalde's residence.

296
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,151
Mama... Mama who?

297
00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:30,350
Ma-mu-wal-day.

298
00:15:30,440 --> 00:15:32,511
- How you pronounce that?
- Ma-mu-wal-day.

299
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:34,511
Mamuwal...

300
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:35,920
Ma-mu-wal-day.

301
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:41,508
- Ma-mu-wal-day.
- Ma-mwa-wal-di.

302
00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:42,988
- Fix your mouth.
- All right, all right.

303
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,798
- Excuse me.
- Your mama, nigga.

304
00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:47,719
I am Monty.
I just rent a room here.

305
00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:50,992
And I assure you, you have seen no bodies.

306
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:52,718
Pleasure to make your acquaintance.

307
00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:55,188
Nigga, we saw you transport them goddamn
dead bodies in the back.

308
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:57,589
- If you don't shut the fuck...
- Where you from, bro?

309
00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:00,115
- Hey, man, stop! Sir...
- What?

310
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:02,510
Mr. Black, do you have business here?

311
00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:03,948
No. I don't have no business here.

312
00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:06,948
We just wanted to come through and say hey
and make sure everything was cool.

313
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:08,473
Why wouldn't it be cool?

314
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:11,672
- Excuse me?
- Why wouldn't it be?

315
00:16:11,760 --> 00:16:15,674
Because y'all moving in this motherfucking
house at 12:00 at night.

316
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:17,592
There's people sleeping around here.

317
00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:21,992
You got crackheads back there sunbathing
into fucking midnight.

318
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:25,318
Bye, bitch!

319
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,550
Hey, come on.
Get your ass...

320
00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:31,911
I'm gonna drop a dime
on you motherfuckers.

321
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:35,152
You happy you done made me waste
a whole day on some bullshit?

322
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,160
- Hey, man. Just fall back.
- Fall back for what?

323
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:38,270
What you got to say now?

324
00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:39,794
You don't think that shit weird?

325
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:42,519
How'd he know your last name?

326
00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:44,637
I'm a famous writer, Cronut.

327
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:45,869
This nigga delusional.

328
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:48,873
My book is in-in-in Barnes and Noble's.

329
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:52,635
Nigga! Ain't nobody
reading your books! Retire!

330
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:55,712
Look, you're running around here smoking
that weed, you're paranoid,

331
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:59,111
you're smoking 2K, K2,
or whatever the fuck you doing...

332
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,477
First of all, I'm not smoking K2.
I'm smoking strictly weed.

333
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:04,668
And second of all, something ain't right
about that house,

334
00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:08,355
because boy was from Africa,
but he had a French accent.

335
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:11,239
He got a side burn that curl up,
like the devil.

336
00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:13,834
I'm thinking, man. You? We got to get
to the bottom of it.

337
00:17:13,920 --> 00:17:16,480
We not getting to the bottom of shit.

338
00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:18,600
Well, you write your book.
I'll just be a detective.

339
00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:20,034
A detective for what?

340
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:25,035
Africa, Carl. Africa.
Are you listening to me?

341
00:17:25,120 --> 00:17:26,713
Southwest don't go to Africa.

342
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,393
You won't help me do shit.

343
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:30,039
I'm trying to marry this man wife,

344
00:17:30,120 --> 00:17:32,228
I'm trying to tell you about these devil
worshippers over here

345
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:33,958
and your book suck.
How about that?

346
00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:39,591
<i>Shady Management.</i>

347
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:40,954
<i>Leave a message.</i>

348
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:43,390
Hey, it's Carl Black.
Just calling you again,

349
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:46,677
just lettin' you know
that I'm writing away.

350
00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:48,398
I need that advancement.

351
00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:51,438
The water bill's due,
we need bread, dish wash li...

352
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:56,960
<i>Do you know who I am?</i>

353
00:17:57,040 --> 00:18:01,079
<i>I am Wooky.
The one that survived the Purge.</i>

354
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,798
<i>I can help you survive
your problem.</i>

355
00:18:02,880 --> 00:18:05,190
<i>Are you being bullied?
Do you hear noises at night?</i>

356
00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:06,600
<i>Phone me.</i>

357
00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:08,120
<i>Are you sick?
Do you have a headache?</i>

358
00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:11,152
<i>Are you hearing things?
Malaria? Ebola?</i>

359
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:12,719
<i>Demon spirits?</i>

360
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:15,030
<i>Call me. Whisper to me.</i>

361
00:18:15,120 --> 00:18:17,634
<i>Twill fight your battles for you today.</i>

362
00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:20,349
<i>I am Wooky.</i>

363
00:18:20,440 --> 00:18:23,114
Ain't nobody go for that bullshit.

364
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,029
All right, yeah. Shit.

365
00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:35,872
Allie Black.

366
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:38,600
Yes, Daddy? Yes?

367
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:40,358
- What you doing?
- I'm studying.

368
00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:41,555
- You're studying.
- Yes.

369
00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:43,273
Yeah. I thought you was home for fall?

370
00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:45,160
Doesn't mean I still
don't have to study, Dad.

371
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:48,272
You know our family have been going
through a lot of stuff,

372
00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:51,113
and you don't like
to follow the rules all the time,

373
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:53,350
'cause I've been asked you
a whole bunch of times

374
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,317
to keep these little boys out of my...

375
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,348
- Daddy, I can explain...
- Ah! What the hell is wrong with you?

376
00:18:57,360 --> 00:18:58,668
I know a lot of gang shit.
You know...

377
00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:00,876
- I thought he was dead!
- No, bitch.

378
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,280
Dying's for pussies.

379
00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:04,829
I told you to keep these little boys
out of this house.

380
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:07,036
I sent you to school for a education...

381
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:09,157
- I had to drop out, okay?
- You dropped out?

382
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:10,508
We dropped out.
A couple goes...

383
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:14,070
You and him about to be living
off that little cripple check every month.

384
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:16,071
- Baby, give me my cane. I'm out.
- Okay.

385
00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:19,471
Yeah, this don't make no sense. I don't
know what you going through, Allie.

386
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:20,789
Daddy, Daddy. Just...

387
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:23,108
- Just leave him alone, okay?
- If you're gonna do somethin',

388
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:24,468
- do somethin'.
- It's already done.

389
00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,391
If you're gonna do
somethin', do somethin'.

390
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:27,914
Freezee!

391
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,230
- Daddy, why'd you do that?
- I didn't even touch him.

392
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:31,588
That's all right.
You got it, baby?

393
00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:33,108
Come on. Help his arm.
Get his am right there.

394
00:19:33,120 --> 00:19:35,077
Hey, I don't need your help!
I'm in the ADA.

395
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:36,230
Baby, you do need help.

396
00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:38,033
- All right.
- You need some help, okay?

397
00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:40,520
Yeah. Lift him up.
One, two, three.

398
00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:43,911
Fuck you! Ain't nobody
need your assistance.

399
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:45,108
Baby, go start the car, okay?

400
00:19:45,120 --> 00:19:46,948
- All right.
- We'll be out of here in a second.

401
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:49,190
I'm gonna let you know one thing.
My dick may not work,

402
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,032
but my tongue game's
strong on your girl.

403
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:53,634
Okay. Baby, go.

404
00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:54,948
Ask him for some gas money, baby.

405
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:57,315
I will. I'll ask him for some. Okay.

406
00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:58,959
Oh, thank God.

407
00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:00,917
But why don't you get
somebody that can walk?

408
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:02,320
Ain't helping.

409
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:06,359
Daddy, listen. Okay, I had to drop out
because your check bounced.

410
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,548
And you would know that if you cared
about anybody in this family

411
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:10,517
except yourself and that damn book.

412
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:11,999
He loves me.

413
00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:17,196
He only cares about himself.
He's so selfish.

414
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:19,200
Allie!

415
00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:23,760
Allie!

416
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:25,600
Allie!

417
00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:33,039
Ekekek. Ekekek.

418
00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:34,679
Psst! Ekekek.

419
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:38,756
Carl, come here.

420
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:40,508
- You gotta see this shit.
- Get over where?

421
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:42,830
- How do I get over there?
- Hop over, man.

422
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:47,554
No, no, for real.
For real. Come here.

423
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,876
- What the fuck are you doing?
- Calm down. Calm down.

424
00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:52,076
Check that. Shit!

425
00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:57,839
Is that Michael Jackson?

426
00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:00,116
<i>Where's the box from Africa?</i>

427
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:01,634
- That's so weird.
- Hey, hey, man!

428
00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:02,790
Hey, man, don't do that!

429
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,996
Why are you always
creeping up on people, man?

430
00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:07,549
- Don't do that.
- That's what I do. I creep.

431
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:10,109
- Look, look.
<i>- Find it.</i>

432
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:14,640
They just moved into the house
and people are already coming over.

433
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,669
Goddamn. She got a big 'ol ass.

434
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:24,320
Hello. I'm here for Dr. Mamuwalde.

435
00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:34,880
Something ain't right.

436
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:35,990
I'mma tell you something.

437
00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:39,198
Leave them goddamn neighbors alone.

438
00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:42,557
- Leave them alone! I'm out of here.
- Look!

439
00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:43,869
I think you made him mad.

440
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:45,951
He's always mad at me.
Don't even trip.

441
00:21:46,040 --> 00:21:48,188
She ain't coming back out of there.
I told you, once you go in there,

442
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:50,237
you ain't coming out,
especially if you're fine.

443
00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:52,914
All the ugly bitches came right out,
but this coochie?

444
00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:54,360
I'm going in.

445
00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:56,873
I'm neighborhood watch.

446
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:02,879
Yeah. You go right on in there.

447
00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:05,110
I trust you.

448
00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:06,838
<i>Snitch, Snitch, come in.</i>

449
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:11,749
What can I do for you?

450
00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:14,309
I'm neighborhood watch.
I need to get in this house.

451
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:17,791
Well then, please, come in,
Mr. Neighborhood Watch.

452
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:19,518
You're very welcome here.

453
00:22:26,360 --> 00:22:28,715
- Cronut, what the fuck are you doing?
- Shh!

454
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:35,149
Why are you looking in their window?

455
00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:36,560
Get out of them people's house.

456
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:39,480
What you see?

457
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:41,748
Well, first of all, this house looks
amazing on the inside,

458
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:44,878
but they're doing
some freaky shit for real.

459
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:48,715
What? What's he doing?

460
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:55,396
Cronut! What's going on?

461
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:58,040
- Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
- What? What? What?

462
00:22:58,120 --> 00:23:00,589
- Oh, shit! Oh, shit!
- What? What?

463
00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:02,159
Go, go.

464
00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:07,831
- Oh, shit.
- Why we running, man?

465
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,719
- Hey, <i>¿qué pasó?</i>
- OG. Hugo.

466
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:12,598
There's vampires, man.
There's vampires.

467
00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:13,954
Re-relax. Ain't no...

468
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:16,919
The vampire feeds on blood.

469
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:19,593
But what he really wants...

470
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:23,360
is to find the things that you love most

471
00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:25,397
and twist you...

472
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:30,396
and torment you every day of your life.

473
00:23:32,680 --> 00:23:34,079
You're a dark motherfucker.

474
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:37,312
You've been saying some crazy shit
back here in this backyard.

475
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,073
So what should we do, OG?

476
00:23:39,160 --> 00:23:41,037
Find out what he wants.

477
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,435
Find out what he's doing
in our neighborhood.

478
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:47,510
Think about it.

479
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:49,637
We ain't never seen
Dr. Mamuwalde in the daytime.

480
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:51,313
- You know why?
- Why?

481
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:53,232
"And they rise from the grave at night

482
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:55,391
- to feast on the living."
- Oh, no.

483
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:57,994
Shut the fuck up for a second.

484
00:23:58,120 --> 00:23:59,838
Just for one second,
shut the fuck up.

485
00:23:59,920 --> 00:24:02,639
You know what?
All that coming to... to life

486
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:06,111
and the dead rising up
and the <i>Tales of the Crypt</i>

487
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:08,510
and the Michael Jackson, the monsters,

488
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:10,750
all that is a bunch of bullshit!

489
00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:12,717
Did you see the little guy in the window?

490
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,280
'Cause you probably think it's Prince

491
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:16,197
or I don't know who
the fuck you think it is.

492
00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:17,873
It's a little pimp in there.

493
00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:22,311
Bitches is getting slapped
over in that house.

494
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:24,468
Man, I know what I saw, man.
That was a goddamn vampire.

495
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:25,879
Definitely. I know what I saw.

496
00:24:25,960 --> 00:24:28,236
A pimp live next door to us, okay?

497
00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:32,319
P-I-M-P.
Put it in my pocket.

498
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:35,950
The reason why he sleep all day?
Because pimping is at night!

499
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:37,951
I'm gone. I'm getting
the fuck out of here.

500
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:39,519
I'm finna go write my book.

501
00:24:39,600 --> 00:24:43,150
You done lost your motherfucking mind.
You need to go sign up for the circus.

502
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:46,153
- Oh, man.
- Don't invite him in.

503
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:47,071
What?

504
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:49,629
Only way to keep a vampire
out of your house.

505
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:51,757
Don't invite him in.

506
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:54,394
I'm gone, man. I ain't...

507
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:56,676
Yeah, you go, man.
We're gonna get to the bottom of it.

508
00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:58,828
I'm gonna do some research.
We'll figure it out, bro!

509
00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:00,558
- Just trust me!
- Shut the fuck up.

510
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:03,388
Well, what about...
What about if you live in the RV?

511
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:05,994
- Is there any rules there?
- Don't invite him in.

512
00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:24,315
I ain't got no more bananas,
'cause this shit is...

513
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:26,994
They got... bats.

514
00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:28,559
Vampire coming at me.

515
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:30,080
God, I didn't sign up for this shit.

516
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:35,594
Fucking nude.

517
00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:38,954
<i>Dispatch to Snitch. Over.</i>

518
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:42,032
Do you know what happens to snitches?

519
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,153
Shit!

520
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:53,631
These bitches bit Snitch's neck!

521
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:56,599
Mama! Oh, shit!
That was shit. They got me.

522
00:25:58,040 --> 00:25:59,997
Oh, damn. Oh, damn.

523
00:26:11,120 --> 00:26:13,589
<i>You know me as the one
that survived the Purge.</i>

524
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,513
<i>Therefore, I could survive anything.</i>

525
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:17,954
<i>What is going on in your life?</i>

526
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:20,111
- Late night?
- Oh. Hey.

527
00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:21,918
Yeah. It was the worst last night.

528
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:23,035
I can explain, though.

529
00:26:23,120 --> 00:26:26,272
Can you tell me
what happened with Allie?

530
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:29,193
- She called you?
- She's mad because you don't trust her.

531
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:32,188
No. She had her little boy in my house.
She ain't paying no rent up in here.

532
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,308
You need to be the bigger man
and call her and apologize,

533
00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:36,436
because I'm not dealing
with all of this mess.

534
00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:39,717
And speaking of which, did you call
the real estate agent like I asked you to?

535
00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:40,995
Oh, man.

536
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:43,879
I'm mentally exhausted from all of this.

537
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:46,190
I'm having a hard time writing, okay?

538
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:48,237
<i>Lorena.</i>

539
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,397
<i>Come, Lorena.</i>

540
00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:55,632
Oh, my God.

541
00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:58,553
- Oh, my God.
- What's going on with you?

542
00:26:58,640 --> 00:26:59,516
Oh, my God.

543
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:00,868
<i>- Do you feel it...</i>
- Oh, my God.

544
00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:02,757
<i>- ...all over your body?</i>
- Oh, shit.

545
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,275
- How is this happening?
- Oh, my God.

546
00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:07,192
Am I missing out on something?

547
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,794
Oh, yes.
Don't stop.

548
00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:12,918
Oh, my. Carl...

549
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:14,354
Carl, did you hear that?

550
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:16,148
Hey, you didn't...
you didn't came in here.

551
00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:18,674
Shh!

552
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:22,151
Okay, then.
That's what I needed.

553
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:25,517
<i>Local authorities are
hesitant to label this a serial killer,</i>

554
00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:27,955
- Oh, my God.
<i>- But sources close to the investigation</i>

555
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:33,359
<i>were heard saying, "This is some fucked up
shit right here, my nigga."</i>

556
00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:35,520
Who's doing all these terrible things
to these women?

557
00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:37,308
<i>- ...they went on to say the dead...</i>
- Oh, my God.

558
00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:39,152
I'm telling you,
we need to get out of here.

559
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,754
Can you please, please
call that real estate man?

560
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:43,748
- The paper's right there.
- I'm gonna call. I'm gonna call him.

561
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:45,398
- Okay. Now.
<i>- ..Signing off saying...</i>

562
00:27:45,480 --> 00:27:48,438
- Call him, please.
<i>- ...hoes got to eat too.</i>

563
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:58,033
Allie!

564
00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:01,594
This is my 17th message.

565
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,479
Please call me back, okay?
I'm looking for you.

566
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,074
I'm worried about you.
Call me back.

567
00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:10,594
Hey.

568
00:28:13,120 --> 00:28:16,476
Listen, I'm not letting you in my house
50 you can tell them same ghost stories...

569
00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:17,994
No, you need to see this for real.

570
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:19,668
<i>Snitch, do you read me?</i>

571
00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:23,560
- Look like a busted bike to me.
- No, look. This Rico bike.

572
00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:26,194
- They done kidnapped Rico, bro.
<i>- Dispatch to Snitch, over.</i>

573
00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:28,112
He don't go nowhere without this bike.

574
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,640
His license suspended.
He got no choice but to ride this bike.

575
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,633
Look, Rico is a grown man
who done looked in the mirror

576
00:28:33,720 --> 00:28:38,430
and realized he ain't got no business
being 50 years old on a tricycle.

577
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:40,240
Or the vampires
could have got him.

578
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:43,119
<i>Dispatch to Snitch, over.</i>

579
00:28:44,760 --> 00:28:46,671
Rico saw something last night.

580
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:48,600
I think I bet the vampires
snatched his ass up.

581
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:50,637
<i>Snitch, what is your 411?</i>

582
00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:52,552
That's Freezee's car.

583
00:28:52,640 --> 00:28:54,836
In there pimping my daughter!

584
00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:04,158
The sun's setting.

585
00:29:06,560 --> 00:29:08,153
The vampire's about to wake up.

586
00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:10,753
Don't invite him in.

587
00:29:14,600 --> 00:29:15,715
<i>Imbecile!</i>

588
00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:17,598
<i>Damn it, man!
You scared the hell out of me!</i>

589
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:20,149
<i>Who the hell you callin' an imbecile?</i>

590
00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:23,392
<i>Now listen, you take
your hands off of me! I don't know you!</i>

591
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:28,950
Whoop.

592
00:29:29,040 --> 00:29:30,951
- Stop playing!
- Got you.

593
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:32,150
You little bitch.

594
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:39,309
No, but for real, though, this is crazy.
What is we doing?

595
00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:43,158
I know Allie's in this house.

596
00:29:43,240 --> 00:29:44,514
Allie!

597
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:47,399
These maniacs done kidnapped Rico
and you just banging on the door?

598
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:50,438
I've been calling Allie all day
and she ain't answer the phone. Relax.

599
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:51,794
Allie!

600
00:29:51,880 --> 00:29:55,032
- What the fuck?
- Can I help you, gentlemen?

601
00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:57,475
My daughter's in there, man.

602
00:29:57,560 --> 00:29:59,995
Come on, man. Give me
my daughter back, man. This is crazy.

603
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:02,356
You got the fuckin'
Halloween shit going on?

604
00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:04,113
That's my daughter!

605
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:06,794
I'm sure I don't know
what you mean, neighbor.

606
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:08,712
The car is in the back.

607
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:10,711
I've been looking for my daughter all day.

608
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:13,758
Your pimping gonna stop.
God don't like ugly, man.

609
00:30:13,840 --> 00:30:17,231
Mr. Black, your daughter
is not in this house.

610
00:30:17,320 --> 00:30:18,320
An!

611
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:23,360
Can I come in the house?

612
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,272
The doctor will not be here until later.

613
00:30:25,360 --> 00:30:28,557
I wonder why? You got all them dead bodies
in there you don't want us to see?

614
00:30:28,680 --> 00:30:31,798
But, if you'd like to come in, Mr. Black,

615
00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:37,000
you will find out in fact
that your daughter is not in this house.

616
00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:39,068
- We can come in and search the whole.
- Mr. Black, please.

617
00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:40,468
You want... that's what you want us to do?

618
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:41,834
Please.

619
00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:45,475
Be my guest.

620
00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:48,837
- You want some real niggas...
- Enjoy yourselves, please.

621
00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:50,354
- ...come in your house?
- Go.

622
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:54,831
Hey, stop.

623
00:30:57,920 --> 00:30:58,955
Allie!

624
00:30:59,040 --> 00:31:00,678
Allie!

625
00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:04,351
What?

626
00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:06,556
- Carl, look at this shit.
- What?

627
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:15,429
That shit look crazy, man.

628
00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:17,676
What the fuck is that dog thing
right there?

629
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:18,875
- Mr. Black!
- Hey! Shit!

630
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:20,440
Damn, bro!
What the fuck is going on?

631
00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:21,748
- What's wrong with you, bro?
- Don't touch these dolls.

632
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:23,034
What is wrong with you?

633
00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:27,956
These are very, very expensive
West African voodoo totems.

634
00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,031
- The doctor is a collector.
- Allie!

635
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:33,720
Allie!

636
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:39,679
Allie! Whoa!

637
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:42,680
- Is my daddy in here?
- Please come in, Allie.

638
00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:43,720
Carl.

639
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:46,520
- What?
- Guess who come in.

640
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:48,238
Dad! What are you doing here?

641
00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:50,596
Allie, what are you doing?
Where your ass been at?

642
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:51,835
What the hell's going on?

643
00:31:51,920 --> 00:31:53,560
Why are you in these nice people's house?

644
00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:55,830
These people ain't nice.
This is a pimp's house.

645
00:31:55,920 --> 00:31:57,752
- This is a nice house.
- Oh, my God.

646
00:31:57,840 --> 00:31:59,672
Man, this is crazy!
Look, he's been putting

647
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:02,195
all kind of crazy stories
in my head about you.

648
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:03,839
The car's in the back...

649
00:32:03,920 --> 00:32:06,799
See, I knew you were going to be tripping
when you found out.

650
00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:09,030
God. Found out what?

651
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:12,435
I just gotta tell you.
I'm just going to say it.

652
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:16,477
- I'm movin' out.
- Movin' out where?

653
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:20,155
Me and Freezee are going to get married
and we're going to make a life together.

654
00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:22,629
I will take my belt off
and tear your ass up.

655
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:25,473
Daddy, I can make my own choices.
It's called feminism.

656
00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:28,871
<i>Oh, I know all
about liberating some women.</i>

657
00:32:28,960 --> 00:32:30,678
- You hear that?
- Yeah.

658
00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:44,116
Let me introduce Dr. Mamuwalde!

659
00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:49,150
Dr. Mamuwalde.

660
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:52,390
Dr. Mamuwalde.

661
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:54,710
Dr. Mamuwalde.

662
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:57,791
Dr. Mamuwalde.

663
00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:01,195
Dr. Mamuwalde.

664
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:04,077
So beautiful.

665
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:06,276
Dr. Mamuwalde.

666
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,600
Dr. Mamuwalde.

667
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:14,274
Dr. Mamuwalde.

668
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:17,000
Is that a Black bite-sized Hugh Hefner?

669
00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:22,069
Dr. Mamuwalde.

670
00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:25,715
Dr. Mamuwalde.

671
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:27,234
All right, man.

672
00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:30,233
Monty, I told you, three times.

673
00:33:30,360 --> 00:33:31,919
Yeah, nigga, damn.

674
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:36,915
Every day is a struggle,
but every night is a feast, you feel me?

675
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:40,311
Carl Black! Show me some love.

676
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:41,788
I can give you some from right here.

677
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:43,393
I can't come over and give up no...

678
00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:45,835
- No love shit, dog.
- Mm-mm.

679
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:49,919
Welcome to my humble abode, Carl Black.

680
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:51,957
How the fuck do you know my name?

681
00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:55,078
That's what's crazy.
You been on my IG page?

682
00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:57,470
Oh, I've had my third eye on you.

683
00:33:57,560 --> 00:33:59,188
I mean, if it was about that shit
the other night,

684
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:00,395
all right, look, ain't got...

685
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:02,994
The doctor is a fan of your book...

686
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:04,080
- Ooh.
- Mr. Black.

687
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:05,997
Shit. Mm.

688
00:34:06,080 --> 00:34:08,594
And doodoo is a fan of your mouth.

689
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:10,512
- Dad.
- You know my book?

690
00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:11,431
- Wow.
- Mm.

691
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:13,160
I told you, you got to get back in there.

692
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:15,271
You know he's in,
uh, a tough spot right now.

693
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:17,188
- He's in a artistic bind.
- Yeah. I'm trying to write a new book.

694
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:18,952
Yeah. You see,
the first one was good.

695
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:20,748
- Yeah. The second one.
- Now, I'm trying to do...

696
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:22,868
- I'm trying to do the second one.
- Gotta be off the chain.

697
00:34:22,880 --> 00:34:26,396
It's a fine piece of literature.
The shit was a modem-day classic.

698
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:29,957
Dr. Mamuwalde.

699
00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:32,509
What type of medicine you practice, bro?

700
00:34:33,560 --> 00:34:38,236
I practice the type of medicine
for those with a particular affliction.

701
00:34:38,320 --> 00:34:39,594
Take two of these

702
00:34:39,720 --> 00:34:41,228
and call me in the morning.

703
00:34:42,240 --> 00:34:44,709
Oh, this.

704
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:45,870
Bless his name.

705
00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:46,960
I knew you was a pimp.

706
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:50,192
- Ha. Such harsh language, Mr. Black.
- Yeah.

707
00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:52,556
I am a purveyor and provocateur

708
00:34:52,640 --> 00:34:56,429
of fine ass hitches
and high-priced pleasure.

709
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,909
I know what I'm looking at when I see it.

710
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:00,508
Hold on. Wait a minute,
little George Jefferson.

711
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:04,514
We ain't doing no provocative nothin'
around here. This is my daughter.

712
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:06,750
Ain't nothin' going up
in there but a tampon.

713
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:08,274
- Daddy!
- Mr. Black, I assure you,

714
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:11,432
I may be a pimp,
but I am no monster.

715
00:35:11,520 --> 00:35:14,080
Matter of fact, to prove my point,

716
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:19,280
allow me. A mind
is a terrible thing to waste.

717
00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:21,556
This is for your education.

718
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:22,680
Really?

719
00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:28,952
- No.
- Och. Daddy!

720
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,714
No! We ain't raisin' no THOTs around here!

721
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:33,628
- We ain't doing no THOTin'!
- But we need the money!

722
00:35:33,640 --> 00:35:36,029
You... but we ain't getting
the money that kind of way.

723
00:35:36,120 --> 00:35:38,839
We sellin' books around here, not pussy!

724
00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:41,514
The Black man has yet again
said no to education.

725
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:42,476
Fuck you!

726
00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:44,028
- Come on. Get your ass out of here.
- Daddy!

727
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,388
- Why are you always yelling at people?
- Fuck you, Mr. Mamuwalde.

728
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:47,629
Thank you, nice man!

729
00:35:47,720 --> 00:35:51,111
Well, let me just say I'm having
a soirée tomorrow night

730
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:53,237
and I would be honored
if you would join me.

731
00:35:53,320 --> 00:35:55,152
I'm expensive!

732
00:35:59,640 --> 00:36:02,758
Tomorrow night is the soirée.

733
00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:03,840
Oh, oh.

734
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:08,711
- Save them for me.
- We expect to be seeing you.

735
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:23,595
You always do this, Daddy.

736
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:25,512
Why wouldn't you let
that pretty man help me?

737
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,637
Dolomite was trying
to get in your panties.

738
00:36:27,720 --> 00:36:29,040
- We don't need his money.
- No.

739
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:32,192
We don't need the money.
I need the money, Dad.

740
00:36:32,280 --> 00:36:34,749
I just want to get my education,
so I don't end up like you.

741
00:36:34,840 --> 00:36:35,875
- Like me?
- Yes, Daddy.

742
00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:38,679
- Just write the book or get a job.
- Get a job, broke nigga!

743
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:42,355
I got some money on your hair, Freezee.
I'm about to unthaw yo ass.

744
00:36:42,440 --> 00:36:43,475
- I'm leaving.
- Allie.

745
00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,908
And me and Freezee are gonna live
happily ever after together.

746
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:47,428
- Allie Black.
- That is what we're doing.

747
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:48,874
- Freezee. Let's go!
- Allie Black.

748
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:51,600
- Allie! Allie!
- I think she just called you a dumb-ass.

749
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:52,828
Stop yelling in the neighborhood!

750
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:54,558
- Allie.
- We're going.

751
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:56,597
- Baby, tuck my legs in.
- I got you.

752
00:36:57,720 --> 00:36:59,472
- Baby.
- Look at that.

753
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:01,148
Always falling like this.

754
00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:02,275
Carl!

755
00:37:02,360 --> 00:37:05,239
Why is she leaving like that, baby?
We just talked about this.

756
00:37:05,320 --> 00:37:07,197
- Baby...
- Well-well, the neighbor next door

757
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:09,317
tried to give some goddamn
vampire pimp money

758
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:11,789
to Allie for school
and goddamn hatin' ass Carl,

759
00:37:11,880 --> 00:37:14,633
he gon' take the money and throw it back
in the goddamn vampire face

760
00:37:14,720 --> 00:37:16,154
and goddamn Allie, goddamn...

761
00:37:16,240 --> 00:37:19,358
Hey, hey, hey, hey,
calm down, little infant!

762
00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:21,431
Vampire? Vampire pimp?

763
00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:23,801
That's what you guys
are out here talking about right now?

764
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:26,348
- No. It ain't even like that.
- We just had this conversation.

765
00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:29,159
- Hey.
- I'm tired of all this craziness.

766
00:37:29,240 --> 00:37:31,228
Did you call the real estate agent
like I asked you to?

767
00:37:31,240 --> 00:37:34,153
Called the real estate agent.
I... left a message for him.

768
00:37:34,240 --> 00:37:38,074
Look, Carl, I'll call him, just like I do
everything else around here, okay?

769
00:37:38,160 --> 00:37:39,160
Oh-oh.

770
00:37:39,240 --> 00:37:41,908
But you know what, we need to talk tonight
when I get home from work.

771
00:37:41,920 --> 00:37:43,672
Oh-oh.

772
00:37:43,760 --> 00:37:45,671
- Babe, don't do that.
- I gotta go to work.

773
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:47,508
- She's gonna cheat on you.
- Shut up, Cronut.

774
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:48,588
It's me, baby.

775
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:49,954
- Yeah.
- Babe.

776
00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:53,556
Yeah, she gonna cheat on you.

777
00:37:55,120 --> 00:37:56,599
I'm gonna cheat on you.

778
00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:58,990
Carl. Carl.

779
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:01,669
Carl!

780
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:03,319
- Carl!
- What?

781
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:05,437
Gotta listen to me.
You gotta hear me out for real.

782
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:06,999
I know you're going through a lot.

783
00:38:07,080 --> 00:38:09,754
I know your old lady trippin',
I know your daughter trippin',

784
00:38:09,840 --> 00:38:13,037
I know you have a writer's block,
but please, bro, just listen to me.

785
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:16,112
Go home. All right?
It's over.

786
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:17,838
I'm movin' the fuck out of this house.

787
00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:19,911
This our house!
We can't let him move us out.

788
00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:22,188
- I don't wannna hear that shit.
- I gotta tell you this for real.

789
00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:25,033
Guess what I found while you was talking
to the pimp vampire?

790
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:27,236
These Rico glasses, man.
They probably got him.

791
00:38:27,320 --> 00:38:29,800
They done... they done drunk all his blood
and everything, man.

792
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:32,190
Stop! That motherfucker
just tried to play me.

793
00:38:32,280 --> 00:38:33,395
He's going to jail.

794
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:35,756
Three hots and a cot,
he's going to jail.

795
00:38:35,840 --> 00:38:37,239
So, what you gonna do about it?

796
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:40,068
The little motherfucker's going to jail
for pimping and pandering around here.

797
00:38:40,080 --> 00:38:41,434
What you mean,
what I'm gonna do?

798
00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:44,433
Police ain't never arrestin'
no goddamn vampire.

799
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:46,318
That's shit, okay?

800
00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,640
Did you see he floated down the stairs?

801
00:38:48,720 --> 00:38:50,268
You didn't see him float?

802
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:51,998
<i>911, what's your emergency?</i>

803
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:54,117
Yes, I have a problem here.

804
00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:58,671
Um, I'm a new neighbor
that just moved in the neighborhood.

805
00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:00,592
As you can tell, I'm Caucasian.

806
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:03,240
And there's a real peculiar guy.

807
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,237
<i>- Is he Black? Okay.</i>
- Yes, he's Black.

808
00:39:05,360 --> 00:39:08,348
<i>- We'll send over five units right away.</i>
- Okay, you'll be here in a second?

809
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:10,351
<i>- Right away.</i>
- Thank you.

810
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:13,558
That's how you do that.

811
00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:14,640
He's going to jail.

812
00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:26,788
Hey, hey, hey, hey,
fall back, fall back.

813
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,308
- What's going on?
- I'm the lead cop on this.

814
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:29,320
Laced, you're a rookie.

815
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:31,028
Listen, I'm just tryin' to have some fun.

816
00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:32,314
I said fall back, man.

817
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:34,828
Listen, I got my gun.
I'm going to this house to have some fun.

818
00:39:34,840 --> 00:39:36,069
Do my thing.

819
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:40,114
All right. Go ahead.
Handle this.

820
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:41,520
What kind of spooky shit is this?

821
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:44,558
First time bein' a cop.
This is gonna be a breeze.

822
00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:46,631
That like a old couple relationship.

823
00:39:52,720 --> 00:39:53,790
Come on out of there

824
00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:55,428
- before I put a hot one in your ass!
- Hold on.

825
00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:57,468
There'll be no gun violence.
Put your gun down. This is my first day.

826
00:39:57,480 --> 00:39:59,073
Shut up and stop being a little bitch.

827
00:40:03,720 --> 00:40:05,870
Two of them in up there,
weird as hell.

828
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:08,952
Lock his ass up.
He got Rico.

829
00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:14,957
- Police.
- Good heavens! What is all the fuss?

830
00:40:15,040 --> 00:40:18,237
Oh, a father and son team, splendid.

831
00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:20,311
What may I do for you,
dark-skinned Hutch?

832
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:23,040
Listen, big fella. Dude down there
saying y'all been involved

833
00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:25,236
in the kidnappin'
of the neighborhood watch captain?

834
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:26,151
Rico.

835
00:40:26,240 --> 00:40:27,514
- So y'all kidnap him?
- Yeah.

836
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:30,428
And I heard you got hoes all up in
through there. Y'all freaky-freaky, huh?

837
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:31,874
Not at all, sir.

838
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,952
- This is the residence of Dr. Mamuwalde.
- Mama-who?

839
00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:36,997
<i>Can't a man pimp in peace?</i>

840
00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:41,354
The name is Dr. Mamuwalde.

841
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:44,711
- Shit.
- He trippin'-trippin'.

842
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:46,438
I hope they get his ass, man.

843
00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:48,508
Listen, big fella,
do you mind if I have a look inside,

844
00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:50,188
see what's going on,
see what I can steal?

845
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:51,788
I mean, just see what's going on
in the house.

846
00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:54,997
Absolutely. My house
is your house, officer.

847
00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:58,789
Feel free to look around
as Soon as you present your warrant.

848
00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:00,075
He trippin'.

849
00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:01,833
- Warrant?
- Yes, warrant.

850
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:04,639
What the fuck? You 'posed to be
an expert on the law now?

851
00:41:04,720 --> 00:41:07,633
I'm gonna show you what we do
with experts down here, hm?

852
00:41:07,720 --> 00:41:09,119
Hold on, what you doing?

853
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:11,191
No! Put the taser off!
Put the taser off!

854
00:41:11,320 --> 00:41:13,834
- You trippin'-trippin'.
- Uh-huh, bust him. Bust him.

855
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:16,150
- Put your taser off.
- Don't eyeball me, boy.

856
00:41:16,240 --> 00:41:17,240
Don't play with me.

857
00:41:17,320 --> 00:41:20,233
We just want to know if you know
about the whereabouts of this Rico guy.

858
00:41:20,320 --> 00:41:21,674
Where is Rico?

859
00:41:21,760 --> 00:41:27,950
You're the one supposed to be looking
for whoever you're looking for, sir.

860
00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:31,237
I don't know who Rico is
and you can't make me.

861
00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:32,640
He's lying, man.

862
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:37,391
How y'all gonna believe somebody dressed
like Dr. Seuss is what I'm sayin"?

863
00:41:37,480 --> 00:41:39,391
What do you do, sir?
For a living?

864
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:43,189
Well, for a living,
I take fantasy and dreams

865
00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:46,272
and I make them into reality.

866
00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:49,671
Let me tell you something, creepy
motherfucker. You got two options.

867
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:53,879
Option A, we look around
inside this spooky motherfucker,

868
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:57,237
or option B, we're gonna arrest your ass,
take you down to the precinct,

869
00:41:57,320 --> 00:41:58,708
ask you a bunch of goddamn questions.

870
00:41:58,720 --> 00:42:01,314
He's going to jail.
That's what I'm talking about.

871
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:03,630
I'll take...
I haven't even chosen my options.

872
00:42:03,720 --> 00:42:05,508
Oh, we're gonna do it.
We're gonna take him now.

873
00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:07,955
Option A, I don't.
Option B...

874
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:09,468
We're gonna take you downtown, Midnite.

875
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:10,754
Wait a minute.

876
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:14,111
How can you call me "midnight"
as dark as you are...

877
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:16,560
- What? What did you say?
- ..with all due respect, officer?

878
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:20,031
Well, if I'm Midnite,
aren't you two Nights?

879
00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:21,948
There ain't shit you're gonna do about it.
Come on with your little...

880
00:42:21,960 --> 00:42:23,748
- Stop resisting.
- They're taking him to jail.

881
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:25,440
That's what I'm talking about.
Do your job.

882
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:27,716
This is definitely Black on Black crime.

883
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:29,871
Hey, I got it.
Take his Black ass down.

884
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:44,195
Officer!

885
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:46,351
I believe there's been a misunderstanding.

886
00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:50,198
Do you mean this Rico?

887
00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:57,790
Rico, what the fuck you doing in there?

888
00:42:57,880 --> 00:43:01,032
I'm fine.
I was just in the basement...

889
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:02,868
They didn't fondle with you
down there, did they?

890
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:04,279
They did me fine.

891
00:43:04,360 --> 00:43:07,398
- They served me fresh bananas.
- From Honduras.

892
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:08,749
Bananas in the basement?

893
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:10,592
They done brainwashed his crazy ass.

894
00:43:10,680 --> 00:43:11,908
They did more than brainwashing.

895
00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:13,752
Somethin' ain't right with him.

896
00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:30,433
<i>Come to me, Lorena.</i>

897
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:40,829
<i>Come to me, Lorena.</i>

898
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:44,395
<i>I've been searching for you.</i>

899
00:43:46,440 --> 00:43:50,832
<i>Are you feeling my breath
upon your corpuscle?</i>

900
00:44:02,440 --> 00:44:05,592
What kind of cop shit is this?
Y'all let him go?

901
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:09,389
Mr. Black, you call us down here again
and waste our damn time,

902
00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:11,869
I'm gonna take your ashy ass to jail.

903
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:13,559
We cop cops.
This ain't no damn joke!

904
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:15,916
Man, if you don't get
your retarded ass...

905
00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:19,391
You better watch your mouth before I stick
these goddamn handcuffs up your ass.

906
00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:21,551
Don't eyeball me, boy.

907
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:23,480
Let's go.

908
00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:29,713
Carl, why are you here with the police?
What did the neighbor do to you?

909
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:32,474
This is what happens when you keep
messing with the neighbors.

910
00:44:32,560 --> 00:44:35,791
Why are you blamin' him for everything?
Because clearly, I see you out here too.

911
00:44:35,880 --> 00:44:38,120
For real, this is your plan.
Don't try to put this on me.

912
00:44:38,200 --> 00:44:39,948
- We're movin' out.
- What do you mean? Wait!

913
00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:41,828
- Without you.
- How you gonna move out without me?

914
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:43,433
- We family.
- No. We not family.

915
00:44:43,520 --> 00:44:45,360
You're just my cousin
that fucks up everything.

916
00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:46,588
- That's family.
- You know what?

917
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:47,908
I'm tired of you always blamin' him.

918
00:44:47,920 --> 00:44:51,151
Look right here. This is what it's about,
me and you. You're messing up.

919
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:01,268
- Babe. I can explain.
- You should be ashamed of yourself.

920
00:45:01,280 --> 00:45:04,796
The motherfucker was trying
to disrespect me in front of my daughter.

921
00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:07,269
I'm tired of you embarrassing our family.

922
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:10,797
You owe that man an apology.

923
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:12,109
Babe...

924
00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:16,554
I don't know if this is it for us.

925
00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:20,349
I used to think it was the house,
the neighborhood, your book.

926
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:23,637
But it's not.
It's you.

927
00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:27,433
It's you and I that don't work.

928
00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:36,596
I got to go back to work.
So you figure that out.

929
00:45:38,440 --> 00:45:41,796
I'll apologize.
I'll go apologize.

930
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:45,316
I don't have a problem apologizing to him.

931
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:47,914
<i>Attack and bring me my wife.</i>

932
00:45:49,680 --> 00:45:51,671
Right this way, Mr. Black.

933
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:53,990
The good doctor'll be here
to deal with you shortly.

934
00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:56,071
Hey, man. Did you just change your accent?

935
00:45:56,160 --> 00:45:59,278
Where'd he go? What the fuck
was he saying?

936
00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:02,120
Wow.

937
00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:04,515
It's nice, though.

938
00:46:07,920 --> 00:46:09,240
- Carl Black.
- Hey!

939
00:46:09,320 --> 00:46:12,073
What the fuck! Jesus, Buddha, Allah!

940
00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:15,831
Is every place in here creepy?

941
00:46:15,920 --> 00:46:18,719
I thought I smelled failure in here.

942
00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:23,033
And I thought I smelled
Celine Dion's wig also in here.

943
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:25,555
You're a funny motherfucker, Carl.

944
00:46:25,640 --> 00:46:29,110
And I don't just mean
that dumb expression on your face.

945
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:32,795
Yeah? Well, look, let me be
straight up with you, all right?

946
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:34,234
- Thank you.
- I don't like you.

947
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:35,320
First time I seen you,

948
00:46:35,400 --> 00:46:37,789
- just didn't like you.
- Okay.

949
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:41,874
My wife sent me over here to apologize
to you and that's what I want to do.

950
00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:44,520
I want to apologize,
but I just want to let you know,

951
00:46:44,600 --> 00:46:46,876
I don't give a fuck.

952
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:48,428
We getting the fuck out
of this neighborhood.

953
00:46:48,440 --> 00:46:50,875
Well, that's very interesting,
Green Lantern,

954
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:53,110
but you can't leave just yet.

955
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:54,474
Oh, yes, I can! Shit!

956
00:46:54,560 --> 00:46:56,560
My lease is up next month.

957
00:46:58,400 --> 00:46:59,470
What's this?

958
00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:03,554
There's something I want from you
and you're not leaving until I get it.

959
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:06,473
Man, I hope it's my nuts for these girls.

960
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:07,959
No!

961
00:47:09,840 --> 00:47:13,231
My book. You like my book?

962
00:47:13,320 --> 00:47:15,550
I told you I was a fan of your book.

963
00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:17,870
- That is crazy.
- It was magnificent.

964
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:19,075
You like my book.

965
00:47:19,160 --> 00:47:21,231
I like you and your family, Carl.

966
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:24,597
And not everybody in my family
agreed with you moving in next door to us.

967
00:47:24,680 --> 00:47:26,273
Your wife.

968
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:28,636
My wife? Lorena?

969
00:47:28,720 --> 00:47:30,040
Lorena.

970
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:33,351
Oh, no. She ain't...
She ain't into no pimping shit.

971
00:47:33,440 --> 00:47:35,716
She ain't into no pimping shit
and I ain't either, okay?

972
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:37,359
Tried it, didn't like it.

973
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:41,513
And my daughter?
That's off limits.

974
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:44,240
You're too grown to be messing
with anybody's daughter.

975
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:46,268
Ain't no man gonna let you
mess with they daughter.

976
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:49,432
She's still a little girl.
She's still doing Juicy Juices.

977
00:47:49,520 --> 00:47:52,160
She's not a grown lady.
She don't know what YAK is,

978
00:47:52,240 --> 00:47:54,072
nor does she know what Grey Goose is.

979
00:47:54,160 --> 00:47:57,790
I had no idea how old she was.
She was my size.

980
00:47:57,880 --> 00:48:00,228
Keep your little (as the count) One,
two, three, four, five,

981
00:48:00,240 --> 00:48:03,870
six, seven, eight, nine,
ten, eleven, twelve fingers

982
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:06,031
away from my daughter, blah-blah.

983
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:07,349
Big mistake.

984
00:48:07,440 --> 00:48:08,760
Don't fuck with my daughter.

985
00:48:08,840 --> 00:48:11,070
And Cronut, he's a character.

986
00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:12,958
Oh, Cronut? You can have him.

987
00:48:13,040 --> 00:48:16,351
Ugh. No one wants Cronut.

988
00:48:16,440 --> 00:48:17,760
You can fuck him if you want.

989
00:48:19,320 --> 00:48:20,719
He's crazy.

990
00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:25,431
He's the one that think Michael Jackson
and Biggie and Tupac is still living,

991
00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:28,034
and-and thinks O.J. didn't do it.

992
00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:29,838
He's got a whole lot of shit in his head.

993
00:48:29,920 --> 00:48:32,639
And he gave me
some crazy theories about you too.

994
00:48:32,760 --> 00:48:36,355
I'mma go ahead and sign this autograph
'fore I can get on out of here.

995
00:48:38,480 --> 00:48:41,313
And what was his theory about me?

996
00:48:41,400 --> 00:48:45,109
We still don't know why you moved
in the neighborhood...

997
00:49:02,480 --> 00:49:05,791
What the fuck!
What's wrong with you?

998
00:49:05,920 --> 00:49:08,878
Egad, Carl Black.

999
00:49:08,960 --> 00:49:13,113
Do I detect hostility in your voice?
I thought we were cool now.

1000
00:49:13,200 --> 00:49:18,274
No, we're not cool!
And you do detect hostility in my voice.

1001
00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:20,874
You got a picture of my wife naked
on your fucking wall!

1002
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:22,837
I ain't even got a picture of this bitch.

1003
00:49:22,920 --> 00:49:24,991
- Did you Photoshop the picture?
- No.

1004
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:27,600
No, that's her.

1005
00:49:27,680 --> 00:49:30,957
I bet I know what Cronut thinks about me.

1006
00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:34,349
You know what?

1007
00:49:34,440 --> 00:49:37,876
<i>He was right.</i>

1008
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:02,672
What are you doing?

1009
00:50:02,760 --> 00:50:04,353
Be quiet. I know what I'm doing.

1010
00:50:04,440 --> 00:50:06,158
Would you... Dad, come on.

1011
00:50:06,240 --> 00:50:08,277
Son, I got something
I need to talk to you about.

1012
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:09,400
All right.

1013
00:50:09,440 --> 00:50:12,558
We got a vampire living next door!
I've seen him!

1014
00:50:12,640 --> 00:50:15,519
- Hey, that's cool!
- I think I've seen that dude.

1015
00:50:15,600 --> 00:50:18,718
What's so... What the fuck is wrong...
What's cool about that?

1016
00:50:18,800 --> 00:50:21,440
Dad, Dad, just relax.
Just call the cops.

1017
00:50:21,520 --> 00:50:22,715
I can't call the cops.

1018
00:50:22,800 --> 00:50:24,677
Okay, everybody knows the vampire rules.

1019
00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:27,388
Like, a vampire cannot come in your house
unless you invite him in.

1020
00:50:27,400 --> 00:50:28,993
Did you invite him in?

1021
00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:31,117
- No. I didn't invite him in.
- All right.

1022
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:32,428
All right, then you're good.
That's good.

1023
00:50:32,440 --> 00:50:33,708
- I'm cool. Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1024
00:50:33,720 --> 00:50:35,028
Come on now.
Everybody knows that.

1025
00:50:35,040 --> 00:50:36,838
It's in literally
every vampire comic book.

1026
00:50:36,920 --> 00:50:37,920
Every one.

1027
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:41,470
Oh, man. You got some weed?

1028
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:43,318
Dad, what?
Just leave. Just leave.

1029
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:45,600
I know who got it.

1030
00:50:45,680 --> 00:50:47,398
No, he doesn't. He's kidding.
Bro, shut up.

1031
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:49,875
- A dime bag? Twenty?
- No, no. Leave. Leave. He's kidding.

1032
00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:52,270
He's kidding. He's kidding.
Go take a nap.

1033
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:54,630
- But do.
- Just be quiet. Just stop.

1034
00:51:03,640 --> 00:51:06,109
I'm gonna watch you all night,
motherfucker.

1035
00:51:37,120 --> 00:51:39,475
Don't invite him in.

1036
00:51:48,080 --> 00:51:49,878
Oh, shit.

1037
00:51:55,520 --> 00:51:56,520
Give me your money.

1038
00:51:56,600 --> 00:51:58,273
Please don't hurt me.

1039
00:51:58,360 --> 00:51:59,759
Please don't hurt...

1040
00:52:24,360 --> 00:52:26,351
Hi, Carl.

1041
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:34,790
<i>No.</i>

1042
00:52:36,160 --> 00:52:37,912
<i>No. I'm being serious.</i>

1043
00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:41,789
I'm telling you, it's been
an interesting week and I apologize.

1044
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:44,872
I feel the timing of it all
is pretty, um, special,

1045
00:52:44,960 --> 00:52:48,476
that you would... I don't know where you
came from, but I appreciate it.

1046
00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:51,831
And I think it's important
that we met tonight

1047
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:54,108
because I wanted to really
apologize for the other night.

1048
00:52:54,120 --> 00:52:56,634
I know my husband was in there tonight.

1049
00:52:56,720 --> 00:52:59,189
Is everything okay?
Mamuwalde, right?

1050
00:52:59,320 --> 00:53:02,233
I have to, um, really get this out,

1051
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:05,756
because I feel like I'm having a little
bit of an out-of-body experience,

1052
00:53:05,840 --> 00:53:09,720
because I typically don't invite
complete strangers into my house

1053
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:13,077
to have a glass of wine.
In this case...

1054
00:53:13,160 --> 00:53:14,992
<i>Don't invite him in.</i>

1055
00:53:19,200 --> 00:53:21,476
- Hey.
- Thank you. I appreciate that.

1056
00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:24,994
What you doing?

1057
00:53:25,080 --> 00:53:26,718
Baby, hi.
Hi. Were you sleeping?

1058
00:53:26,800 --> 00:53:29,872
What is he doing here?
He's not supposed to be here.

1059
00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:32,759
Where are your manners, baby?
This is Dr. Mamuwalde.

1060
00:53:32,840 --> 00:53:34,988
- Our neighbor from earlier...
- I know what you doing!

1061
00:53:35,000 --> 00:53:36,752
Yes, where are your manners, baby?

1062
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:38,717
He's not supposed to be in this house.

1063
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:40,552
Invited him to have
a glass of wine with me

1064
00:53:40,640 --> 00:53:42,268
because if anything,
we owe him a thank you.

1065
00:53:42,280 --> 00:53:44,148
- I don't wanna hear all that.
- If it wasn't for our neighbor,

1066
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:46,515
- I would have gotten mugged tonight.
- You got mugged?

1067
00:53:46,600 --> 00:53:49,353
He swooped... Where did you come from?
Where? How did you get there?

1068
00:53:49,440 --> 00:53:50,794
- Swooped.
- What happened?

1069
00:53:50,880 --> 00:53:55,636
Fortunately for you, I happened to be
in the area looking for a late-night snack

1070
00:53:55,720 --> 00:53:59,554
and happened to stumble
upon your tastiness.

1071
00:53:59,640 --> 00:54:03,315
He's not supposed to be in our home.
He was not invited by no one.

1072
00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:07,678
Under ordinary circumstances,
Carl Black here would be right,

1073
00:54:07,760 --> 00:54:10,479
- but I was invited, Carl.
- You know the rules.

1074
00:54:10,600 --> 00:54:13,160
- His kind is not invited in our house.
- Listen...

1075
00:54:13,240 --> 00:54:15,356
- My kind?
- Yeah.

1076
00:54:15,480 --> 00:54:19,075
That is a racist statement, Negro.

1077
00:54:19,160 --> 00:54:21,197
I'll have you know,

1078
00:54:21,280 --> 00:54:25,160
in this age of divisiveness and bigotry,

1079
00:54:25,280 --> 00:54:27,556
we can't do this to each other.

1080
00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:29,800
Sheesh!

1081
00:54:29,880 --> 00:54:32,190
Yes. Baby, listen,
please just calm down.

1082
00:54:32,280 --> 00:54:35,636
We got a real live vampire in my house
and you're telling me to calm down?

1083
00:54:35,720 --> 00:54:40,669
If I had a wife as fine as yours,
I'd never let her out of my sight.

1084
00:54:40,760 --> 00:54:43,308
Hey, man! What-what-what
you doing? You can't do that, man.

1085
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:44,988
What the fuck! What if I grab
your hair, man?

1086
00:54:45,000 --> 00:54:48,516
<i>Do not...</i>

1087
00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:51,353
Touch my hair, Carl Black.

1088
00:54:51,440 --> 00:54:54,319
You got two Bo Derek braids
hanging on both sides of your face

1089
00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:56,630
and you gon' touch on my girl's shit.

1090
00:54:56,720 --> 00:54:59,360
Baby, just calm down, okay?

1091
00:54:59,480 --> 00:55:01,148
Okay, that's enough. That's enough.

1092
00:55:01,160 --> 00:55:03,197
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- What are you doing, Carl?

1093
00:55:03,320 --> 00:55:04,674
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it.

1094
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:07,036
- Ouch!
- You know I'm clumsy a little bit.

1095
00:55:28,520 --> 00:55:31,717
That looks exquisitely painful.

1096
00:55:31,800 --> 00:55:33,950
Ah-ah-ah. Go in there
and rinse your arm off.

1097
00:55:34,040 --> 00:55:35,748
- I got it, Carl. I got it.
- Yeah, you cut your hand

1098
00:55:35,760 --> 00:55:38,149
cause you're standing up there
reckless eyeballing.

1099
00:55:38,240 --> 00:55:41,949
I got it. Dr. Mamuwalde,
it was really, really nice to meet you.

1100
00:55:42,040 --> 00:55:43,668
- Well, go wash your hand, baby.
- Yeah, I'm...

1101
00:55:43,680 --> 00:55:45,512
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Put a band-aid on it.

1102
00:55:45,600 --> 00:55:48,035
O-positive we'll see each other again.

1103
00:55:48,120 --> 00:55:52,318
Listen, you little neglected <i>Harry Potter</i>
cast member, let me tell you something.

1104
00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:56,234
That's my princess, and that's my wife,
and I love her.

1105
00:55:56,320 --> 00:55:58,311
You're not going to destroy my family!

1106
00:55:58,400 --> 00:56:01,472
What do you intend
to do about it, Carl Black?

1107
00:56:01,560 --> 00:56:03,915
Install my cable, motherfucker?

1108
00:56:04,000 --> 00:56:05,434
Nah.

1109
00:56:05,520 --> 00:56:09,354
I'm gonna pimp-slap
the shit out of your ass, motherfucker!

1110
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:15,000
Damn, you're strong!

1111
00:56:15,080 --> 00:56:18,755
Let me tell you a little story.

1112
00:56:20,840 --> 00:56:24,720
<i>I've been looking
for Lorena for centuries.</i>

1113
00:56:24,800 --> 00:56:29,510
<i>I first laid eyes on that fine
young thing in the Caribbean.</i>

1114
00:56:29,600 --> 00:56:33,070
<i>Lost her, found her again.</i>

1115
00:56:33,200 --> 00:56:37,717
<i>I've seen all types of women
in all shapes and sizes,</i>

1116
00:56:37,800 --> 00:56:41,953
<i>but none compare
to the governor's daughter.</i>

1117
00:56:42,040 --> 00:56:46,989
<i>We were in love
and I was finally going to make her mine.</i>

1118
00:57:00,280 --> 00:57:03,113
You were warned, vampire.

1119
00:57:04,240 --> 00:57:08,950
Tonight's the night
that I send your soul to hell!

1120
00:57:09,040 --> 00:57:10,951
Demon!

1121
00:57:11,040 --> 00:57:13,634
Come, woman.

1122
00:57:13,720 --> 00:57:15,950
No. No. No!

1123
00:57:16,040 --> 00:57:18,953
<i>They took
the love of my life from me</i>

1124
00:57:19,080 --> 00:57:23,233
<i>and I have been looking
for my Puerto Rican princess ever since.</i>

1125
00:57:27,320 --> 00:57:30,597
<i>Go to hell, vampire.</i>

1126
00:57:34,320 --> 00:57:37,233
They took my life.

1127
00:57:39,960 --> 00:57:41,837
Man, that was a cool story!

1128
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:46,551
But the real fact is, is that's my wife,
and I love her.

1129
00:57:46,640 --> 00:57:48,200
And you're not gonna destroy my family.

1130
00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:51,796
You're doing a pretty good job
of that yourself.

1131
00:57:51,880 --> 00:57:53,359
What the fuck?

1132
00:57:53,440 --> 00:57:55,272
She will be mine.

1133
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:00,955
No, no!

1134
00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:03,799
<i>Mine...</i>

1135
00:58:03,880 --> 00:58:05,439
Carl Black!

1136
00:58:14,480 --> 00:58:17,359
<i>The authorities are still in shambles</i>

1137
00:58:17,440 --> 00:58:19,511
<i>as they scurry about for clues</i>

1138
00:58:19,640 --> 00:58:22,632
<i>- in the murders of these prostitutes.</i>
- Wow.

1139
00:58:22,720 --> 00:58:25,997
<i>If anyone out there has any information
or any leads...</i>

1140
00:58:26,080 --> 00:58:27,080
- Damn.
<i>- ..Feel free.</i>

1141
00:58:27,160 --> 00:58:31,119
<i>...to DM me personally at jack_...</i>

1142
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:33,589
Hey, babe. Hey, hey.

1143
00:58:33,680 --> 00:58:36,035
- How's your arm?
- It's better. It's feeling good.

1144
00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:37,400
- I gotta go to work. What?
- No!

1145
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:39,588
- Why you gotta go to work?
- Because you put me in this situation.

1146
00:58:39,600 --> 00:58:40,948
I got to go to work to pay the bills.

1147
00:58:40,960 --> 00:58:43,395
Let me pay you for the night.

1148
00:58:43,480 --> 00:58:45,630
You can't afford me for the night.

1149
00:58:47,040 --> 00:58:49,190
- Listen, I love you.
- I know.

1150
00:58:49,280 --> 00:58:51,388
I'll just want to get you guys
out of this neighborhood.

1151
00:58:51,400 --> 00:58:53,596
Okay. Wait, wait, call me crazy.

1152
00:58:53,680 --> 00:58:55,910
I-I'm just throwing this out there.

1153
00:58:56,000 --> 00:58:58,469
I'm having second thoughts
about selling the house.

1154
00:58:58,560 --> 00:59:00,119
- What?
- I don't know,

1155
00:59:00,200 --> 00:59:04,398
ever since I met the neighbor last night,
the way that he was helping me

1156
00:59:04,480 --> 00:59:05,628
- or the way that he...
- Hey, hey.

1157
00:59:05,640 --> 00:59:06,755
No, but maybe it's not

1158
00:59:06,840 --> 00:59:08,948
- such a bad neighborhood, babe.
- No, no, no, no, no. No!

1159
00:59:08,960 --> 00:59:10,908
- Wait, wait. He's a nice guy.
- Baby, listen. No! That... no.

1160
00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:13,388
He's not no fucking nice...
What did I tell you about liking people?

1161
00:59:13,400 --> 00:59:15,437
- Liking?
- You always liking somebody.

1162
00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:17,591
- No! Hey!
- He saved me.

1163
00:59:17,680 --> 00:59:20,877
Relax. Let's put this to rest
until I come home from work tonight, okay?

1164
00:59:20,960 --> 00:59:22,473
And we can talk about it then.

1165
00:59:22,560 --> 00:59:25,234
- I got something I want to tell you.
- What?

1166
00:59:25,320 --> 00:59:26,754
The next-door neighbor...

1167
00:59:26,840 --> 00:59:28,478
- Yeah?
- He's a vampire.

1168
00:59:28,560 --> 00:59:29,880
A vampire.

1169
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:31,513
- He's a fucking vampire.
- Okay.

1170
00:59:31,600 --> 00:59:33,511
A vampire.
You're crazy.

1171
00:59:33,600 --> 00:59:34,600
You're just jealous.

1172
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:41,232
Cronut, let me in.
There's a vampire living next door.

1173
00:59:56,440 --> 00:59:57,669
Cronut?

1174
01:00:02,400 --> 01:00:03,400
Eww.

1175
01:00:09,600 --> 01:00:11,955
What's wrong with you?
Die, vampire!

1176
01:00:12,040 --> 01:00:14,793
- Die, vampire! Die!
- Let me go. Let me go. Let me go!

1177
01:00:14,920 --> 01:00:16,240
Get up off of me, man.

1178
01:00:16,320 --> 01:00:17,908
Fuck you doing in my house all uninvited?

1179
01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:20,548
- I didn't invite you in here.
- Why you sneaking up on me like that?

1180
01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:22,836
Why am I sneaking up on you?
This is my house!

1181
01:00:22,920 --> 01:00:25,588
Fuck you doing up in my house?
I thought you won't fuck with me no more.

1182
01:00:25,600 --> 01:00:26,396
Whoa.

1183
01:00:26,480 --> 01:00:28,198
Why you got them damn glasses on?

1184
01:00:28,280 --> 01:00:30,999
Why you care? You don't like 'em?
They don't go with my 'fit?

1185
01:00:31,080 --> 01:00:32,718
- No.
- What... what you want?

1186
01:00:32,800 --> 01:00:35,269
Shit. I, well, I just...

1187
01:00:35,400 --> 01:00:37,038
Hey, man, look.

1188
01:00:37,120 --> 01:00:38,713
All right. You was right.

1189
01:00:38,800 --> 01:00:41,314
We do have a creature
living next door to us.

1190
01:00:41,400 --> 01:00:42,993
It's a real vampire, man.

1191
01:00:43,080 --> 01:00:44,354
I seen his teeth!

1192
01:00:44,440 --> 01:00:47,512
I thought you was lying at first,
but he's real.

1193
01:00:47,600 --> 01:00:50,319
And he already got Allie,
and I don't want him to get my wife!

1194
01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:52,073
And?

1195
01:00:52,160 --> 01:00:54,754
And that's about the closest
to an apology you gon' get.

1196
01:00:54,840 --> 01:00:58,515
I've been doing my research
and what I came up with?

1197
01:00:58,600 --> 01:00:59,999
That house right over there?

1198
01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:02,594
It's a master vampire over there,
and that's the nest.

1199
01:01:02,720 --> 01:01:03,994
And we should kill him.

1200
01:01:04,080 --> 01:01:06,276
- What?
- We should kill him.

1201
01:01:06,360 --> 01:01:08,510
We, we.
That's French. We?

1202
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:11,393
Yes, it is we.
Ain't no I in us.

1203
01:01:11,520 --> 01:01:14,876
It's we. Me and you. We family.

1204
01:01:14,960 --> 01:01:17,156
Yeah. Whatever.

1205
01:01:17,240 --> 01:01:18,992
We should kill that motherfucker.

1206
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:20,832
Let's bury him in the ground, man.

1207
01:01:20,920 --> 01:01:24,231
Just leave his head out
and just kick him in the head all day.

1208
01:01:24,320 --> 01:01:26,277
Check this out.
What's my name?

1209
01:01:26,360 --> 01:01:28,351
- Cronut.
- No, what's my real name?

1210
01:01:28,440 --> 01:01:30,238
- Man, look, man. Stop playing.
- Mr. what?

1211
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:31,958
- Mister?
- Mr. Right.

1212
01:01:32,080 --> 01:01:34,833
Mr. Right. You want to get rid
of the vampire?

1213
01:01:34,960 --> 01:01:37,759
- Yeah.
- Trust me. I made a call.

1214
01:01:40,720 --> 01:01:42,996
- Who is that? Is that Barack Obama?
- Trust me.

1215
01:01:43,080 --> 01:01:45,310
Not quite, but close.

1216
01:01:50,160 --> 01:01:51,160
Oooh.

1217
01:01:53,840 --> 01:01:58,198
Oh. Did you see that African booty
scratcher come out of there?

1218
01:01:58,280 --> 01:01:59,634
- Yes.
- No!

1219
01:01:59,720 --> 01:02:01,791
- Yes.
- Why'd you call him?

1220
01:02:01,880 --> 01:02:03,359
- Just trust me.
- Oh, man.

1221
01:02:03,440 --> 01:02:05,480
- Have I ever let you down?
- Yeah, a million times.

1222
01:02:05,520 --> 01:02:06,948
Don't worry about that.
That don't count.

1223
01:02:06,960 --> 01:02:09,600
- Oh, man. Look how he dressed.
- It looks crazy.

1224
01:02:09,680 --> 01:02:11,228
- Don't worry about it.
- Whoopi Goldberg.

1225
01:02:11,240 --> 01:02:13,550
- You smell a vampire?
- Not yet, wait.

1226
01:02:13,640 --> 01:02:16,393
Right now,
I smell fear.

1227
01:02:16,480 --> 01:02:19,518
- Fear?
- And I smell broke-ass-ness

1228
01:02:19,600 --> 01:02:21,034
coming from this direction.

1229
01:02:21,120 --> 01:02:24,078
- Broke-ass-ness?
- No, you smell your bottom lip.

1230
01:02:24,160 --> 01:02:25,639
Last but not least, I smell...

1231
01:02:28,440 --> 01:02:30,511
two bitch-ass niggas.

1232
01:02:30,640 --> 01:02:33,154
That's why you called me
to save you like I did the Purge.

1233
01:02:33,240 --> 01:02:34,880
Saved me? You ain't
saved me from nothin'!

1234
01:02:34,920 --> 01:02:36,228
You better take your Black ass off.

1235
01:02:36,240 --> 01:02:39,073
- Punk bitch nigga, you owe me money!
- I don't owe you nothin'.

1236
01:02:39,160 --> 01:02:41,390
You little dick bitch.
You pee on your boss.

1237
01:02:41,480 --> 01:02:43,915
- Fuck you too.
- I hope your wife get pregnant again

1238
01:02:44,000 --> 01:02:45,832
and I hope the baby is not yours.

1239
01:02:45,920 --> 01:02:46,920
You kiss my ass!

1240
01:02:46,960 --> 01:02:50,191
Your mother, your grandfather,
your uncles are all the same nigga.

1241
01:02:50,280 --> 01:02:51,760
I know you work for that cab company.

1242
01:02:51,800 --> 01:02:53,828
You need to get back in there
and drive that cab, so-

1243
01:02:53,840 --> 01:02:55,268
- Carl Black, you owe me money!
- Hey, hey, hey.

1244
01:02:55,280 --> 01:02:57,308
Calm down, calm down.
I got it. I got it, calm down.

1245
01:02:57,320 --> 01:02:59,308
- This nigga is pissing me off.
- If you calm down a little

1246
01:02:59,320 --> 01:03:01,357
- for a second. Look...
- Don't you hit my head.

1247
01:03:01,440 --> 01:03:03,556
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

1248
01:03:03,640 --> 01:03:06,109
Look, I promised him I'd show him
some crazy spooky shit

1249
01:03:06,200 --> 01:03:08,714
if I recorded it and put it
on his live TV show.

1250
01:03:08,800 --> 01:03:09,800
- On YouTube?
- Yeah.

1251
01:03:09,880 --> 01:03:11,628
- You ain't got no followers.
- He's popular.

1252
01:03:11,640 --> 01:03:13,711
Five hundred thousand subscribers.

1253
01:03:13,800 --> 01:03:16,872
I got a live vampire livin' next door
to me. That's what I got.

1254
01:03:16,960 --> 01:03:18,075
Nigga, that's why I'm here.

1255
01:03:18,160 --> 01:03:19,948
- That's why I brought these!
- Hey, hey!

1256
01:03:19,960 --> 01:03:21,120
Put your leftovers down, man.

1257
01:03:21,200 --> 01:03:25,319
You must listen to me
because I am a vampire slayer.

1258
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,357
The vampires are very dangerous.

1259
01:03:27,440 --> 01:03:29,397
They will kill you.

1260
01:03:29,480 --> 01:03:32,677
He will suck your blood.
He could be after your wife.

1261
01:03:32,760 --> 01:03:34,876
You have a wife. I know that.
I've seen her.

1262
01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:36,439
She have a nice ass.
No disrespect.

1263
01:03:36,520 --> 01:03:38,708
Tell me about these niggas, please.
What did he look like?

1264
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:40,631
He's bite-size,
he's real short.

1265
01:03:40,720 --> 01:03:42,074
How short is he?

1266
01:03:42,160 --> 01:03:44,037
He's short.
He's-he's, you know, he's...

1267
01:03:44,120 --> 01:03:45,548
Between you and this nigga,
where is he?

1268
01:03:45,560 --> 01:03:47,228
Like this way? This way?
That way? Under the table?

1269
01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:48,878
- Pocket size.
- Pocket size nigga?

1270
01:03:48,960 --> 01:03:50,553
He got like a little perm.

1271
01:03:50,680 --> 01:03:52,830
He looked like that little man
on the dime.

1272
01:03:52,920 --> 01:03:54,069
- What dime?
- The dime.

1273
01:03:54,160 --> 01:03:56,595
- The dime, motherfucker. The dime.
- Dime. Ten cents.

1274
01:03:56,680 --> 01:03:58,318
Ten cents a day,
like what you eat.

1275
01:03:58,400 --> 01:04:00,311
Shut the fuck up,
little bitch nigga. Fuck you.

1276
01:04:00,400 --> 01:04:02,914
If I had a choice between the vampires,

1277
01:04:03,000 --> 01:04:05,514
the devil and Donald Trump,

1278
01:04:05,600 --> 01:04:07,591
I would take Donald Trump.

1279
01:04:07,680 --> 01:04:11,389
The question is now he's trying
to take your family away,

1280
01:04:11,480 --> 01:04:13,520
- what are you are gonna do?
- Hey, hey, hey!

1281
01:04:13,600 --> 01:04:15,788
We're not the vampire.
You don't have to keep putting that on us.

1282
01:04:15,800 --> 01:04:18,633
Don't be a bitch!
If I want to talk to a little nigga,

1283
01:04:18,720 --> 01:04:20,320
I go to Chuck E. Cheese.

1284
01:04:22,400 --> 01:04:24,948
Either you gon' help me, or you gon'
help me, somebody gonna help me

1285
01:04:24,960 --> 01:04:26,680
or I'm going up
in there with a wooden thing

1286
01:04:26,760 --> 01:04:28,188
- and I'm gonna stab him in the...
- Mm.

1287
01:04:28,200 --> 01:04:31,795
I'm telling you! You know how...
I'm going up in there and...

1288
01:04:31,880 --> 01:04:32,880
Hey!

1289
01:04:32,960 --> 01:04:35,600
- You guys are crazier'n shit!
- Who the fuck is that?

1290
01:04:37,680 --> 01:04:39,990
Carl Black, I'm all you have.

1291
01:04:40,080 --> 01:04:42,196
You must save your wife.

1292
01:04:42,280 --> 01:04:44,959
<i>Before it's too late.</i>

1293
01:05:06,120 --> 01:05:07,394
Fellas, listen to me.

1294
01:05:07,480 --> 01:05:10,279
The vampire is very tricky and old.

1295
01:05:10,360 --> 01:05:14,274
It has survived many centuries
because he's smart.

1296
01:05:14,360 --> 01:05:17,830
Much smarter than your stupid
ignorant ass, Carl Black.

1297
01:05:17,920 --> 01:05:21,436
That insidious bastard
is a master vampire.

1298
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:23,312
A master vampire?

1299
01:05:23,400 --> 01:05:27,519
He's not to be played with.
That means he has companions.

1300
01:05:27,600 --> 01:05:30,114
- Companions?
- We have a lot more to deal with.

1301
01:05:30,200 --> 01:05:31,713
You have to get to know your enemy.

1302
01:05:31,800 --> 01:05:32,949
I thought I knew him.

1303
01:05:33,040 --> 01:05:34,917
And how about his crew?
Do you know them?

1304
01:05:35,000 --> 01:05:37,640
His crew? What?
The butler?

1305
01:05:37,720 --> 01:05:41,190
Butler?! That's not a butler!
That's his ghoul!

1306
01:05:41,280 --> 01:05:42,554
What is a ghoul?

1307
01:05:42,640 --> 01:05:45,678
This is not the time
to be a bitch, Carl Black.

1308
01:05:45,760 --> 01:05:48,229
A ghoul is very dangerous.

1309
01:05:48,320 --> 01:05:49,588
What about those fine-ass girls
he had in there?

1310
01:05:49,600 --> 01:05:51,716
- Yeah. They was fine.
- Cronut!

1311
01:05:51,840 --> 01:05:56,038
- I liked them.
- Those are not average fine-ass girls.

1312
01:05:56,120 --> 01:05:59,158
Those are his bodyguards.
They are murderous.

1313
01:05:59,240 --> 01:06:00,116
What?

1314
01:06:00,200 --> 01:06:03,158
The more beautiful they are,
the more dangerous.

1315
01:06:03,240 --> 01:06:05,754
This is getting more serious
than I imagined.

1316
01:06:05,840 --> 01:06:08,753
What's this shit?
It was addressed to him.

1317
01:06:08,840 --> 01:06:10,388
He got a little chain on.
He got your same facial structure...

1318
01:06:10,400 --> 01:06:12,755
Don't be a dick face.
Give me that.

1319
01:06:22,280 --> 01:06:24,749
It is nothing.
Just some stupid fucking doll.

1320
01:06:24,840 --> 01:06:26,558
- Put it away.
- Are you sure?

1321
01:06:26,640 --> 01:06:28,108
How we going to kill this motherfucker?

1322
01:06:28,120 --> 01:06:29,872
- Dad. Dad. I got an idea.
- What?

1323
01:06:29,960 --> 01:06:32,156
I turned the Purge bats into stakes.

1324
01:06:32,240 --> 01:06:34,277
If you stab a vampire with it, it'll die.

1325
01:06:34,360 --> 01:06:37,716
Shut up! This is why I'm here.

1326
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:40,792
We have to kill the vampire!

1327
01:06:58,320 --> 01:07:00,231
Why you wipe my kisses off like that?

1328
01:07:00,320 --> 01:07:02,436
Baby, because you put
too much lip gloss on.

1329
01:07:02,520 --> 01:07:04,068
- No, I don't.
- Yeah, you do, and then my shit

1330
01:07:04,080 --> 01:07:06,268
- be all glittery for the rest of the day.
- Shut up. I do it for you

1331
01:07:06,280 --> 01:07:08,188
- when I'm around you. Whatever.
- Use Chapstick.

1332
01:07:08,200 --> 01:07:09,948
- You cute. You fine and all, baby.
- Whatever.

1333
01:07:09,960 --> 01:07:11,473
Give me a little bit of head now.

1334
01:07:11,560 --> 01:07:12,560
- What?
- I'm just saying,

1335
01:07:12,640 --> 01:07:14,148
like, I wanna get a little bit of head...

1336
01:07:14,160 --> 01:07:15,948
We're in front of my parents' house.
Are you serious?

1337
01:07:15,960 --> 01:07:17,473
Baby, they're sleeping a little bit.

1338
01:07:17,560 --> 01:07:18,595
- Babe.
- Come on, baby.

1339
01:07:18,720 --> 01:07:20,428
- Just a little bit of head.
- Stop playing all the time.

1340
01:07:20,440 --> 01:07:23,080
- Baby, my-my legs. I'm-I'm paralyzed.
- Stop.

1341
01:07:23,160 --> 01:07:25,595
That's the least you could do,
community service.

1342
01:07:25,680 --> 01:07:27,228
Let me get a little bit of community head.

1343
01:07:27,240 --> 01:07:28,594
Shut up. We need to talk.

1344
01:07:28,680 --> 01:07:31,600
Talk about what? Baby, look, talk
with my dick in your mouth a little bit.

1345
01:07:31,640 --> 01:07:33,668
- I don't mean to be disrespectful.
- Wait, wait. Listen.

1346
01:07:33,680 --> 01:07:35,557
Listen to what?

1347
01:07:35,640 --> 01:07:37,392
- Baby.
- Did you hear that?

1348
01:07:37,480 --> 01:07:38,788
The only thing you need to listen to is.

1349
01:07:38,800 --> 01:07:41,872
Listen!

1350
01:07:42,880 --> 01:07:43,995
The fuck was that?

1351
01:07:46,720 --> 01:07:49,234
Shit! Oh, shit!

1352
01:07:49,320 --> 01:07:50,799
- What is that?
- Ooh.

1353
01:07:50,920 --> 01:07:51,920
Oh, my God.

1354
01:07:54,280 --> 01:07:56,590
Freezee! Freezee!

1355
01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:58,751
That was Allie.

1356
01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:00,239
Time to get the fuck out.

1357
01:08:02,560 --> 01:08:05,473
- What just happened?
- I don't know. I just heard screams, man.

1358
01:08:05,600 --> 01:08:08,194
He made the first move.
He has taken your daughter.

1359
01:08:08,280 --> 01:08:09,679
It's all fucked up, man.

1360
01:08:09,760 --> 01:08:12,513
I didn't know they had Allie, too.
I like Allie! But there's more.

1361
01:08:12,600 --> 01:08:14,508
- Well, tell us more.
- Yeah, you better say something

1362
01:08:14,520 --> 01:08:16,680
- before we take your banana bag, nigga.
- Come on now.

1363
01:08:16,720 --> 01:08:18,552
The vampires, man, they got me.

1364
01:08:18,640 --> 01:08:20,313
See that house next door?

1365
01:08:20,400 --> 01:08:23,631
They havin' a big-ass
vampire party up there, man.

1366
01:08:23,720 --> 01:08:25,438
Dracula kind of blushin'.

1367
01:08:25,520 --> 01:08:28,831
They said when it's over,
they gonna kill everybody.

1368
01:08:28,920 --> 01:08:30,433
- Oh, God.
- Shit.

1369
01:08:30,520 --> 01:08:32,238
Things all fucked up around here, man.

1370
01:08:32,320 --> 01:08:34,880
Not me.
They ain't gonna get me.

1371
01:08:34,960 --> 01:08:36,712
They ain't gonna get me!

1372
01:08:37,920 --> 01:08:38,920
Come back here!

1373
01:08:39,000 --> 01:08:43,039
Fuck that!
I'm a real snitch!

1374
01:08:43,120 --> 01:08:45,794
Those vampires, they done bit me.

1375
01:08:47,120 --> 01:08:48,120
Did you hear that?

1376
01:08:48,200 --> 01:08:49,759
Yeah, you saw how he took off?

1377
01:08:49,840 --> 01:08:52,229
This is exactly what the monster wants.

1378
01:08:52,320 --> 01:08:54,709
He wants you to attack him at night,
when he's strongest.

1379
01:08:54,800 --> 01:08:56,757
Don't fall for it.

1380
01:08:56,840 --> 01:08:59,148
What am I supposed to do?
I got a wife and a daughter over there.

1381
01:08:59,160 --> 01:09:01,276
Just wait till the daytime,
when he's weak.

1382
01:09:01,360 --> 01:09:02,948
- And then we kill him.
- No, no, no, no.

1383
01:09:02,960 --> 01:09:06,271
If you wait fill the morning,
Lorena and Allie will be vampires.

1384
01:09:06,360 --> 01:09:08,829
- Oh.
- Junior, I love you to death.

1385
01:09:08,920 --> 01:09:12,151
They already got your sister in there.
They're trying to get your mama.

1386
01:09:12,240 --> 01:09:16,029
This is a good neighborhood and I'm here
to protect it, because I'm Carl Black.

1387
01:09:16,120 --> 01:09:18,919
And I'm Cronut. We ride together,
we die together.

1388
01:09:19,000 --> 01:09:20,673
Go lock up the house!

1389
01:09:20,800 --> 01:09:24,077
We need the right weapons
to kill this vampire.

1390
01:09:24,160 --> 01:09:26,037
- I made a phone call.
- Who you call?

1391
01:09:26,120 --> 01:09:28,077
- Mr. Saturday Night.
- What?

1392
01:09:28,160 --> 01:09:30,117
He knows everything
about killing vampires.

1393
01:09:30,200 --> 01:09:31,235
Saturday Night?

1394
01:09:31,320 --> 01:09:34,358
I met him last Friday at Fat Tuesday's.

1395
01:09:34,480 --> 01:09:36,391
Let's go. It's war.

1396
01:09:44,520 --> 01:09:46,591
Friends, let me do all the talking.

1397
01:09:48,400 --> 01:09:50,869
I've seen this guy kill lots of people.

1398
01:09:50,960 --> 01:09:52,792
Don't do no bitch shit now.

1399
01:10:01,200 --> 01:10:02,200
Let's go.

1400
01:10:07,200 --> 01:10:09,840
He's the only one to kill vampires.

1401
01:10:09,920 --> 01:10:11,911
He'll give us all the weapons.

1402
01:10:13,400 --> 01:10:14,674
Just stay calm.

1403
01:10:16,520 --> 01:10:18,318
I believe in God,
first and foremost.

1404
01:10:18,440 --> 01:10:19,874
So we have vampires.

1405
01:10:19,960 --> 01:10:22,110
- I'm scared.
- What you scared of?

1406
01:10:22,200 --> 01:10:23,360
He looks like The Undertaker.

1407
01:10:23,440 --> 01:10:26,876
I may not have what you want,
but I got just what you need.

1408
01:10:26,960 --> 01:10:28,560
Holy shit.

1409
01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:31,671
- You ain't playin'.
- No, he's not.

1410
01:10:31,760 --> 01:10:33,831
- Damn!
- You're gonna like this.

1411
01:10:35,360 --> 01:10:36,759
Whoa.

1412
01:10:36,840 --> 01:10:38,908
- Oh, that's cool. I like that.
- That's alkaline water.

1413
01:10:38,920 --> 01:10:40,194
Alkaline? It's holy water!

1414
01:10:40,280 --> 01:10:42,112
Joel Osteen holy water.

1415
01:10:42,200 --> 01:10:43,793
It kind got a pineapple taste to it.

1416
01:10:43,880 --> 01:10:49,159
Since we have vampires,
I got us some UV sunlight.

1417
01:10:49,240 --> 01:10:51,993
Hey, hey, hey.

1418
01:10:54,360 --> 01:10:56,351
You're Black, motherfucker.
It don't work as well.

1419
01:10:56,480 --> 01:10:58,039
Nigga, I can't see now.

1420
01:10:58,120 --> 01:11:01,033
They say short motherfuckers
love to get freaky,

1421
01:11:01,120 --> 01:11:04,192
so I brought this just for you.

1422
01:11:04,320 --> 01:11:06,516
My boy. You know me, don't you?

1423
01:11:06,600 --> 01:11:08,398
- Not really.
- Is this real leather?

1424
01:11:08,480 --> 01:11:10,232
- Not really.
- I'm wearing this.

1425
01:11:10,320 --> 01:11:11,913
Look at that. Look, look, look, look.

1426
01:11:12,000 --> 01:11:14,833
When y'all really ready to take out
some motherfuckers...

1427
01:11:14,920 --> 01:11:16,115
Ooh.

1428
01:11:16,200 --> 01:11:18,191
- This what I pull out.
- Shit.

1429
01:11:18,280 --> 01:11:21,079
- God is great.
- All the time.

1430
01:11:22,200 --> 01:11:23,474
If it ain't not Jesus.

1431
01:11:23,560 --> 01:11:25,597
You got it cold.
You put that on.

1432
01:11:25,680 --> 01:11:27,717
- Me?
- You put that on.

1433
01:11:30,120 --> 01:11:31,633
God gon' protect you.

1434
01:11:33,600 --> 01:11:35,080
There's something I want to show you.

1435
01:11:37,120 --> 01:11:39,191
That look like Leslie Jones' dildo.

1436
01:11:39,280 --> 01:11:41,112
Oh.

1437
01:11:41,200 --> 01:11:42,388
- Nigga...
- Hey, wait, wait, man.

1438
01:11:42,400 --> 01:11:44,400
- I think he just stabbed me, he just...
- Stop it.

1439
01:11:44,440 --> 01:11:45,588
I felt it in my... in my body.

1440
01:11:45,600 --> 01:11:47,273
No, you're cool.
Don't be bitches.

1441
01:11:47,360 --> 01:11:49,271
You look like you know
what's goin' on.

1442
01:11:49,360 --> 01:11:51,397
I know exactly what's goin' on.

1443
01:12:00,160 --> 01:12:02,037
Nigga, you're Illuminati. I see you.

1444
01:12:02,120 --> 01:12:03,520
Enough of that.

1445
01:12:04,560 --> 01:12:07,439
- Thank you, Mr. Friday the 13th.
- It's Saturday.

1446
01:12:07,520 --> 01:12:09,068
Nigga, this nigga
Friday the 13th.

1447
01:12:09,080 --> 01:12:11,390
This nigga's... nigga!
All right, cool, cool.

1448
01:12:11,480 --> 01:12:12,754
You keep doing your thing.

1449
01:12:15,880 --> 01:12:17,553
That nigga's on some <i>Harry Potter</i> shit.

1450
01:12:17,640 --> 01:12:19,868
It's cool, really. I know the nigga.

1451
01:13:02,000 --> 01:13:04,514
This motherfucker lit!

1452
01:13:04,600 --> 01:13:05,999
They know how to party here.

1453
01:13:07,160 --> 01:13:09,674
We gotta find Allie.

1454
01:13:09,760 --> 01:13:12,991
Damn, man, I'm staying right here.
I think I feel good right here.

1455
01:13:21,600 --> 01:13:24,114
Cronut! Go that way.

1456
01:13:36,520 --> 01:13:38,909
<i>...with three people
dragging someone.</i>

1457
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:41,108
- Neighborhood, somebody.
<i>- Harrison.</i>

1458
01:13:41,120 --> 01:13:43,316
- This is Harrison.
<i>- Do you guys need a backup unit?</i>

1459
01:13:43,400 --> 01:13:44,799
No, I'm good, Captain.
I mean,

1460
01:13:44,880 --> 01:13:46,880
this shit making me
a little nervous for real, man.

1461
01:13:46,960 --> 01:13:48,871
I mean, we back down
to this spooky-ass house.

1462
01:13:48,960 --> 01:13:50,837
We just left here a couple of days ago.

1463
01:13:50,920 --> 01:13:52,479
Listen, I don't want to be no cop.

1464
01:13:52,560 --> 01:13:54,668
I just thought pieces of shit
dropped-dropped big time.

1465
01:13:54,680 --> 01:13:56,353
Man. My man is shitting on himself.

1466
01:13:56,440 --> 01:13:57,868
This shit is spooky out here, Captain.

1467
01:13:57,880 --> 01:14:00,759
I mean, shit, there's all kinds
of noises out here

1468
01:14:00,840 --> 01:14:03,275
and fucking some...
Some wind and shit. Can y'all...

1469
01:14:03,360 --> 01:14:04,600
I don't got the heart for this.

1470
01:14:04,680 --> 01:14:05,840
<i>Harrison, is everything okay?</i>

1471
01:14:05,960 --> 01:14:07,598
What's wrong?
You're supposed to be...

1472
01:14:07,680 --> 01:14:09,308
You're supposed to be hard.
You're acting scared.

1473
01:14:09,320 --> 01:14:11,596
- What's wrong? Harry, what's wrong?
<i>- Harrison.</i>

1474
01:14:11,680 --> 01:14:13,668
I thought you had all the tricks
and now you're acting like a bitch.

1475
01:14:13,680 --> 01:14:15,193
<i>Harrison.</i>

1476
01:14:18,960 --> 01:14:20,997
A bite of crime 'bout to bite you, nigga.

1477
01:14:37,320 --> 01:14:40,711
I'm not a vampire.
My name's Allie, Allie Black.

1478
01:14:40,800 --> 01:14:42,393
I live next door.

1479
01:14:42,480 --> 01:14:45,472
If you could just get me
out of this, it would...

1480
01:14:46,560 --> 01:14:48,039
Okay. Look, my... my...

1481
01:14:48,120 --> 01:14:52,478
Can you ask Dr.Mama-tunday-wanday
to come here?

1482
01:14:53,480 --> 01:14:55,118
Damn.

1483
01:15:04,120 --> 01:15:06,589
What the fuck was that?

1484
01:15:08,800 --> 01:15:10,950
Shut up.

1485
01:15:13,240 --> 01:15:15,595
Don't talk.

1486
01:15:15,680 --> 01:15:17,318
What the fuck is your problem?
Shut up.

1487
01:15:21,200 --> 01:15:25,273
Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Hey.

1488
01:15:55,080 --> 01:15:57,720
- What?
- That was a silver metal nigga.

1489
01:15:57,800 --> 01:16:00,189
Oh, God.
A silver metal nigga?

1490
01:16:00,280 --> 01:16:01,998
Silver metal.
Not a regular nigga.

1491
01:16:02,080 --> 01:16:03,479
Metal nigga?

1492
01:16:03,560 --> 01:16:05,710
There are more of them niggas
around. Trust me.

1493
01:16:08,880 --> 01:16:10,439
- Oh, shit.
- Whoo-whoo.

1494
01:16:11,640 --> 01:16:12,914
Oh, God.

1495
01:16:14,600 --> 01:16:16,113
Please don't hurt me.

1496
01:16:18,000 --> 01:16:20,276
Please, Mr. knight
in big, black armor.

1497
01:16:20,360 --> 01:16:21,873
- Oooh.
- Oh, my God.

1498
01:16:21,960 --> 01:16:24,349
Oh, my God.

1499
01:16:24,440 --> 01:16:28,434
- Shh.
- Mmm.

1500
01:16:28,560 --> 01:16:30,119
- It's Cronut, baby!
- What?!

1501
01:16:30,200 --> 01:16:31,548
- I got you, didn't I?
- Cronut... Cronut...

1502
01:16:31,560 --> 01:16:33,988
- You didn't even know it was me, did you?
- Cronut! Get me out of here.

1503
01:16:34,000 --> 01:16:36,868
- You gotta untie me out, please.
- Yeah. You're as fine as a motherfucker.

1504
01:16:36,880 --> 01:16:38,868
- When did you grow up?
- Cronut, shut... Shut the fuck up!

1505
01:16:38,880 --> 01:16:41,228
If you like it, we second cousins,
we ain't no kin, so we can...

1506
01:16:41,240 --> 01:16:43,748
Are you serious right now?
Shut the fuck up. I'm gonna tell Daddy.

1507
01:16:43,760 --> 01:16:45,910
Oh, shit, man.

1508
01:16:46,920 --> 01:16:48,513
Now I know why the vampire wanted her.

1509
01:16:48,600 --> 01:16:52,389
Oh, hell no!
That's my baby.

1510
01:16:53,680 --> 01:16:58,277
Baby, please wake up.
Wake up, baby. Oh...

1511
01:16:58,360 --> 01:16:59,360
God.

1512
01:16:59,400 --> 01:17:00,548
- Get your damn hands off!
- Jesus, fuck!

1513
01:17:00,560 --> 01:17:01,560
Don't touch my lady!

1514
01:17:01,640 --> 01:17:03,074
He's in there, trying to kill us.

1515
01:17:03,160 --> 01:17:05,436
What the fuck is you in this shit
for in the first place?

1516
01:17:05,520 --> 01:17:07,511
I was trying to escape.
I was going with Freezee.

1517
01:17:07,640 --> 01:17:09,188
That's what getting
hot in the ass get you.

1518
01:17:09,200 --> 01:17:10,840
Hurry up and get me the fuck out of here.

1519
01:17:14,080 --> 01:17:15,150
All right. Let's go.

1520
01:17:15,240 --> 01:17:16,719
- What? Oh, oh!
- My feet.

1521
01:17:16,800 --> 01:17:18,628
I was going with Freezee
and I don't even know where he is.

1522
01:17:18,640 --> 01:17:19,908
Yeah, there it is, right...

1523
01:17:19,920 --> 01:17:21,680
- Stop looking at me.
- Shut the fuck... shh.

1524
01:17:22,360 --> 01:17:25,398
Please come back to life.

1525
01:17:25,480 --> 01:17:28,632
Please, baby, I want
some of that pussy again.

1526
01:17:28,720 --> 01:17:31,234
I mean, I love you again.
I swear I love you.

1527
01:17:34,800 --> 01:17:36,120
Carl? Carl?

1528
01:17:37,400 --> 01:17:39,038
Jesus Christ, what happened?

1529
01:17:39,120 --> 01:17:40,713
I had the worst dream.

1530
01:17:40,840 --> 01:17:41,875
What did he do to you?

1531
01:17:41,960 --> 01:17:45,874
I was, uh,
I was trying to bite you.

1532
01:17:46,880 --> 01:17:48,518
Carl, what's in my mouth?

1533
01:17:48,640 --> 01:17:49,755
You look like Blac Chyna.

1534
01:17:49,840 --> 01:17:51,433
Oh, stop. What's in my mouth?

1535
01:17:51,560 --> 01:17:53,597
I don't know, but I don't want
no head no more.

1536
01:17:53,680 --> 01:17:55,000
What is this, Carl?
What is this?

1537
01:17:55,040 --> 01:17:57,077
It look like a pimple on the mouth.

1538
01:18:00,880 --> 01:18:02,360
Where is Daddy at?
Where is everybody?

1539
01:18:02,440 --> 01:18:03,948
They right here looking
for your stupid ass.

1540
01:18:03,960 --> 01:18:04,791
But how we gonna get them?

1541
01:18:04,880 --> 01:18:06,428
All right. This is what we're gonna do.
All right.

1542
01:18:06,440 --> 01:18:08,590
This me, this you.
When I'm gonna say "hike,"

1543
01:18:08,680 --> 01:18:09,788
- you're gonna throw the ball...
- Right.

1544
01:18:09,800 --> 01:18:10,828
Nah, I don't like that play.

1545
01:18:10,840 --> 01:18:12,877
This what we gon' do, go right here,
ten yards cut.

1546
01:18:12,960 --> 01:18:15,268
- Are you playing football?
- You-you want to get out of here or not?

1547
01:18:15,280 --> 01:18:17,396
- It doesn't work! Shut the fuck up.
- Just let's go.

1548
01:18:28,920 --> 01:18:31,389
- No.
- Calm down. No.

1549
01:18:31,480 --> 01:18:32,800
Don't you do your neck like that.

1550
01:18:32,880 --> 01:18:34,518
Calm down.

1551
01:18:37,040 --> 01:18:38,792
- Calm the fuck down.
- Please, please.

1552
01:18:41,080 --> 01:18:44,789
No! Cronut, no!

1553
01:18:44,880 --> 01:18:46,473
Please.

1554
01:18:52,960 --> 01:18:55,839
Don't you do it,
don't you do it.

1555
01:18:55,920 --> 01:18:58,480
No...

1556
01:19:01,560 --> 01:19:02,560
Mayweather.

1557
01:19:02,640 --> 01:19:04,268
He gave it like that.

1558
01:19:06,240 --> 01:19:08,038
Yeah!

1559
01:19:20,440 --> 01:19:23,717
I'm a vampire slayer.
I'm like Blade.

1560
01:19:23,800 --> 01:19:25,074
- I did that.
- You did what?

1561
01:19:25,160 --> 01:19:27,071
- I killed him.
- No, I did that. I did...

1562
01:19:27,160 --> 01:19:28,514
- Really?
- I'm Blade. Yeah, yeah.

1563
01:19:31,280 --> 01:19:32,953
Let's go find your dad.

1564
01:19:33,040 --> 01:19:35,600
Carl, I don't feel well.
Tell me, where are we?

1565
01:19:35,680 --> 01:19:36,795
<i>Lorena?</i>

1566
01:19:38,240 --> 01:19:39,150
There he is!

1567
01:19:39,240 --> 01:19:40,275
Carl Black.

1568
01:19:41,400 --> 01:19:43,596
Release my beloved.

1569
01:19:43,680 --> 01:19:45,273
That's the nigga next door.

1570
01:19:45,360 --> 01:19:47,271
You don't mess with a man's wife!

1571
01:19:47,360 --> 01:19:48,873
That is our wife.

1572
01:19:48,960 --> 01:19:51,110
She is at least on a time share.

1573
01:19:51,200 --> 01:19:53,350
I've been waiting my whole life for you

1574
01:19:53,440 --> 01:19:58,719
to kill you, you punk-bitch,
little ass, dick-looking bitch.

1575
01:19:58,800 --> 01:20:00,711
You call him a bitch? Come on.

1576
01:20:00,800 --> 01:20:02,708
We ain't finna be too many
more bitches up in here now.

1577
01:20:02,720 --> 01:20:03,788
You better watch your mouth.

1578
01:20:03,800 --> 01:20:06,314
Listen here, Black Baltimore Raven.

1579
01:20:06,400 --> 01:20:11,031
You will no longer
disparage my household.

1580
01:20:11,120 --> 01:20:12,349
Hit him with that juice.

1581
01:20:16,480 --> 01:20:19,359
Hit him again. Damn,
let me see your shit.

1582
01:20:19,440 --> 01:20:21,636
Man, that's mango juice
you're throwing on that man.

1583
01:20:21,720 --> 01:20:23,199
Why this nigga is not dying?

1584
01:20:23,280 --> 01:20:24,759
- Why?
- Oh, man. That's bullshit.

1585
01:20:24,880 --> 01:20:27,068
- What kind of nigga is this?
- Fuck you're gonna kill a vampire

1586
01:20:27,080 --> 01:20:29,356
with Visine, motherfucker?

1587
01:20:29,440 --> 01:20:30,560
Hit him with that third one.

1588
01:20:30,600 --> 01:20:31,874
Punk bitch, die!

1589
01:20:33,560 --> 01:20:35,870
This nigga is not dying.
Back up.

1590
01:20:35,960 --> 01:20:37,758
Thank you, ladies.

1591
01:20:37,840 --> 01:20:39,433
- Whoa.
- Daddy.

1592
01:20:39,560 --> 01:20:41,188
- Where you been?
- We've been looking for you.

1593
01:20:41,200 --> 01:20:43,760
- I saved Allie.
- No, I saved you.

1594
01:20:43,840 --> 01:20:45,672
<i>Enough!</i>

1595
01:20:47,680 --> 01:20:50,240
Look how you got
my woman's mouth looking, man.

1596
01:20:50,320 --> 01:20:53,631
I bring to you from Africa, Egypt,

1597
01:20:53,720 --> 01:20:55,916
Denmark and Dayton.

1598
01:21:03,560 --> 01:21:04,914
That's Jodeci!

1599
01:21:08,720 --> 01:21:10,393
No!

1600
01:21:11,800 --> 01:21:15,031
I swear by the black hairs
of your chinny chin chin,

1601
01:21:15,120 --> 01:21:17,475
I will huff and puff.

1602
01:21:17,600 --> 01:21:21,230
<i>And these demons
will blow your house down.</i>

1603
01:21:21,320 --> 01:21:23,152
What's up, y'all?

1604
01:21:23,240 --> 01:21:25,880
- Watch out... oh!
- Oh, shit!

1605
01:21:25,960 --> 01:21:27,280
What the hell are you doing here?

1606
01:21:27,360 --> 01:21:28,794
Freezee,

1607
01:21:28,880 --> 01:21:30,154
what happened to you?

1608
01:21:30,280 --> 01:21:32,999
Vampire gang.
We out here, gang-gang!

1609
01:21:33,080 --> 01:21:34,718
They done hooked your boy up.

1610
01:21:34,800 --> 01:21:39,158
Half vampire, half goat legs,
full horse dick.

1611
01:21:39,240 --> 01:21:41,151
Donkey dick.

1612
01:21:42,720 --> 01:21:44,438
It's all backwards though.

1613
01:21:44,520 --> 01:21:46,238
Your ass is forward, Freezee.

1614
01:21:46,320 --> 01:21:47,674
They done fuck me up in the lab.

1615
01:21:47,760 --> 01:21:50,274
You're a hairy retarded vampire.

1616
01:21:50,360 --> 01:21:52,108
- This ain't the life I chose.
- You fucked him up.

1617
01:21:52,120 --> 01:21:54,111
You fucked him up.
You fucked him up.

1618
01:21:54,200 --> 01:21:56,077
I appreciate it.
At least I can walk now.

1619
01:21:56,160 --> 01:21:58,834
Listen here, Switchblade.

1620
01:21:58,920 --> 01:22:01,833
You already know Black Lives Matter.

1621
01:22:01,920 --> 01:22:05,879
This is Black matter lives.

1622
01:22:07,160 --> 01:22:09,834
Welcome to the dark, motherfucker.

1623
01:22:09,920 --> 01:22:11,108
<i>Attack!</i>

1624
01:22:11,120 --> 01:22:12,160
Come on. Come on. Come on.

1625
01:22:44,200 --> 01:22:46,032
- You hit me in the nuts!
- I'm sorry.

1626
01:22:47,280 --> 01:22:48,873
I'm tired of your ass.

1627
01:22:53,600 --> 01:22:55,591
Let's go, bitch.
Let's go.

1628
01:23:02,480 --> 01:23:04,073
I got you!

1629
01:23:11,760 --> 01:23:15,390
- Yeah, bitch!
- Die slow! Die slow!

1630
01:23:15,480 --> 01:23:17,073
Carl! Behind you!

1631
01:23:28,800 --> 01:23:29,800
Help her.

1632
01:23:34,760 --> 01:23:37,912
- I can't move my hand.
- I can't move mine.

1633
01:23:38,000 --> 01:23:40,071
I'm throwing up gang signs.

1634
01:23:48,640 --> 01:23:50,677
Finally, Lorena.

1635
01:24:22,040 --> 01:24:25,271
Nigga is not dead yet.
I don't think he's dead.

1636
01:24:35,200 --> 01:24:36,599
Baby, he's not dead.

1637
01:24:39,840 --> 01:24:44,152
<i>You know I'm coming now.</i>

1638
01:24:46,480 --> 01:24:48,869
Go get the voodoo doll.
It's the only way to kill him.

1639
01:24:48,960 --> 01:24:51,076
- All right. Cool.
- Hurry.

1640
01:24:56,280 --> 01:24:58,476
Go lock the back door.
Get the doors locked. Come on.

1641
01:24:58,560 --> 01:25:00,471
We can't kill him without the voodoo doll!

1642
01:25:02,920 --> 01:25:04,877
Cronut, hurry up. Hurry.

1643
01:25:06,400 --> 01:25:07,913
Hurry up, Cronut.

1644
01:25:09,800 --> 01:25:12,030
Wooky said this will kill the vampire.

1645
01:25:12,120 --> 01:25:13,440
Is that it?

1646
01:25:13,520 --> 01:25:14,919
- Yeah.
- All right. Let's go.

1647
01:25:17,000 --> 01:25:18,195
Whoa! Shit!

1648
01:25:19,920 --> 01:25:21,638
Ah, shit!

1649
01:25:24,000 --> 01:25:26,560
Come on, come on. Oh, shit!

1650
01:25:26,680 --> 01:25:28,557
- Please. Please.
- Hey, hey, stop.

1651
01:25:28,640 --> 01:25:31,075
Please.

1652
01:25:32,840 --> 01:25:35,070
Shit!

1653
01:25:54,960 --> 01:25:56,314
<i>Lorena.</i>

1654
01:25:57,960 --> 01:26:00,474
<i>Come to me, Lorena.</i>

1655
01:26:00,560 --> 01:26:02,597
- Carl...
- What's wrong?

1656
01:26:02,680 --> 01:26:04,273
He's calling me.

1657
01:26:07,560 --> 01:26:12,714
<i>You can kill me,
but you cannot make me die.</i>

1658
01:26:22,640 --> 01:26:25,553
<i>I will have what belongs to me.</i>

1659
01:26:35,240 --> 01:26:37,231
I'm 'bout to go kill Mamuwalde.

1660
01:26:37,320 --> 01:26:38,958
Okay.

1661
01:26:43,360 --> 01:26:46,398
- Damn, Hugo.
- Nobody calls me Hugo.

1662
01:26:47,600 --> 01:26:48,999
What do they call you then?

1663
01:26:49,080 --> 01:26:51,276
<i>Filero.</i>

1664
01:26:51,360 --> 01:26:53,670
And what's <i>Filero?</i>

1665
01:26:53,760 --> 01:26:56,832
It means blade in Mexican.

1666
01:27:00,000 --> 01:27:01,434
Really?

1667
01:27:15,400 --> 01:27:17,073
Carl... no...

1668
01:27:18,840 --> 01:27:21,229
<i>Where do you think you're going?</i>

1669
01:27:21,320 --> 01:27:22,993
What did you just do to me?

1670
01:27:23,080 --> 01:27:24,593
<i>Do you feel that?</i>

1671
01:27:26,120 --> 01:27:27,394
I got the voodoo doll.

1672
01:27:27,480 --> 01:27:30,120
Break the voodoo doll.

1673
01:27:30,200 --> 01:27:32,350
- What?
- Break the voodoo doll!

1674
01:27:33,600 --> 01:27:34,396
Cronut!

1675
01:27:34,480 --> 01:27:36,869
<i>Release your meaningless life.</i>

1676
01:27:36,960 --> 01:27:38,394
Fuck about that...

1677
01:27:38,520 --> 01:27:41,319
<i>I see we don't know what immortal means.</i>

1678
01:27:41,440 --> 01:27:43,954
Break the doll, the voodoo doll!

1679
01:27:45,840 --> 01:27:47,160
- Break it!
- Break it!

1680
01:28:01,960 --> 01:28:04,600
- You motherfucker.
<i>- Don't you touch me.</i>

1681
01:28:09,120 --> 01:28:11,157
<i>Come to me, Lorena.</i>

1682
01:28:12,160 --> 01:28:15,039
- You better stop!
<i>- Come this way.</i>

1683
01:28:15,120 --> 01:28:17,316
Lorena, wake up!

1684
01:28:17,400 --> 01:28:18,959
<i>Lorena.</i>

1685
01:28:20,520 --> 01:28:23,034
<i>Take your place with me.</i>

1686
01:28:23,120 --> 01:28:24,838
Babe, don't do this! Baby!

1687
01:28:24,920 --> 01:28:29,471
<i>We are the Jay-Z and Beyoncé
of the underworld.</i>

1688
01:28:31,400 --> 01:28:35,030
<i>Complete my darkness.</i>

1689
01:28:35,160 --> 01:28:38,312
<i>Come with me.
There's not much time left.</i>

1690
01:28:50,480 --> 01:28:52,835
<i>You don't need him.</i>

1691
01:28:52,920 --> 01:28:56,515
<i>He doesn't have a job
and he can't write a book.</i>

1692
01:29:07,440 --> 01:29:10,000
<i>I got this new book coming out.</i>
Terror Night.

1693
01:29:10,080 --> 01:29:11,639
Nigga! Ain't nobody reading your book!

1694
01:29:11,720 --> 01:29:14,394
My book is in... in...
in Barnes and Noble's.

1695
01:29:14,480 --> 01:29:17,000
<i>That book was terrible. It's one
of the worst books I ever read.</i>

1696
01:29:17,120 --> 01:29:18,349
Carl, I'm not happy here.

1697
01:29:18,440 --> 01:29:19,828
I need the money, Dad.

1698
01:29:19,840 --> 01:29:21,831
Just just leave.
Just leave. Go take a nap.

1699
01:29:21,920 --> 01:29:23,560
This ain't the time
for your goddamn book.

1700
01:29:24,440 --> 01:29:26,113
I don't know if this is it for us.

1701
01:29:26,200 --> 01:29:29,192
I used to think it was the house,
the neighborhood, your book.

1702
01:29:31,600 --> 01:29:32,708
<i>You need to realize</i>

1703
01:29:32,720 --> 01:29:35,189
<i>that family's the most important thing
in life, not a book.</i>

1704
01:29:36,200 --> 01:29:37,680
- I'm moving out.
- You're messing up.

1705
01:29:39,760 --> 01:29:42,513
It's you and I
that don't work. It's you.

1706
01:29:45,760 --> 01:29:48,036
<i>Come to me now.</i>

1707
01:29:52,800 --> 01:29:54,473
Carl Black, save your wife.

1708
01:30:09,760 --> 01:30:13,799
Global warming is real.

1709
01:30:31,480 --> 01:30:34,871
Jack Mihoff, ANN News Live
with the Buzz.

1710
01:30:34,960 --> 01:30:37,270
So you've survived the Purge.

1711
01:30:37,360 --> 01:30:40,671
You and this ragtag band of pimps, hoes...

1712
01:30:40,760 --> 01:30:42,108
- No, that's my family.
- Sorry, what?!

1713
01:30:42,120 --> 01:30:43,760
No. It wasn't no pimps
and hoes over here.

1714
01:30:43,800 --> 01:30:45,473
You defeated the vampire.

1715
01:30:45,560 --> 01:30:47,676
Saved the whole entire neighborhood.

1716
01:30:47,760 --> 01:30:50,991
Have you, Black Panther,
Chloe, and Bow-Wow

1717
01:30:51,080 --> 01:30:54,471
ever thought about becoming
the new Black Ghostbusters?

1718
01:30:57,240 --> 01:31:00,437
- Hunting ghosts?
- Hunting ghosts? I mean...

1719
01:31:00,520 --> 01:31:01,908
You don't have to answer that, Carl.

1720
01:31:01,920 --> 01:31:03,718
It's a good idea.
We could make money.

1721
01:31:03,800 --> 01:31:04,949
Let's wait, let's wait.

1722
01:31:05,040 --> 01:31:07,350
Don't be a bitch.
Let's make this money, Carl.

1723
01:31:07,480 --> 01:31:09,915
Yes. Don't be a bitch.
Make the money.

1724
01:31:10,000 --> 01:31:11,673
And what the fuck did you do?

1725
01:31:11,760 --> 01:31:13,468
- Look at me.
- We could make money, Carl.

1726
01:31:13,480 --> 01:31:15,517
- Get the money, Carl.
- Carl, let's do it.

1727
01:31:15,600 --> 01:31:17,557
- I'm gonna make money.
- Yeah. Why-why not?

1728
01:31:17,640 --> 01:31:19,313
One more question.
Handicapped white man,

1729
01:31:19,400 --> 01:31:22,392
is it true that your first experience
with vampires

1730
01:31:22,480 --> 01:31:25,871
was in the jungle in Hanoi
where your troop was ambushed,

1731
01:31:26,000 --> 01:31:30,437
you were ravaged, and your legs
were completely destroyed?

1732
01:31:30,520 --> 01:31:32,670
Fuck you, Sammy Sosa.

1733
01:31:32,760 --> 01:31:34,428
One thing I hate
about this neighborhood...

1734
01:31:34,440 --> 01:31:36,192
All the goddamn vampires.

1735
01:31:36,280 --> 01:31:39,193
Well, we would just like to thank you

1736
01:31:39,280 --> 01:31:41,430
for your service
to this country and make...

1737
01:31:41,520 --> 01:31:42,590
Oh, my Lord!

1738
01:31:42,680 --> 01:31:44,388
His hands are strong,
but his legs are dead.

1739
01:31:44,400 --> 01:31:46,160
Come on. Come on.
Let his hand. Let his hand.

1740
01:31:46,200 --> 01:31:48,000
Get off me, Carl!
Your wife's cheating on you!

1741
01:31:48,040 --> 01:31:49,308
- What are you talking about?
- What?

1742
01:31:49,320 --> 01:31:50,480
- I see everything!
- Shut up!

1743
01:31:50,560 --> 01:31:53,518
- Cronut's gay.
- No, I'm not. That don't count in jail.

1744
01:31:53,600 --> 01:31:54,748
That's not even your daughter!

1745
01:31:54,760 --> 01:31:57,400
- Uh-uh.
- No. I'm sick of this.

1746
01:31:57,480 --> 01:31:59,437
Yeah. I'm sick of you.

1747
01:31:59,520 --> 01:32:01,511
Come on, Carl.

1748
01:32:04,600 --> 01:32:06,188
<i>Are you ready?</i>

1749
01:32:06,200 --> 01:32:08,430
<i>Give me one second,
baby. I'm coming.</i>

1750
01:32:08,520 --> 01:32:10,033
Lord knows I'm coming.

1751
01:32:10,120 --> 01:32:13,431
I know you happy
you ain't with Clive no more.

1752
01:32:13,520 --> 01:32:15,840
- But what's taking you so long?
- You're rushing me, babe.

1753
01:32:15,880 --> 01:32:18,235
You ain't rush Clive.
I know you waited for his ass.

1754
01:32:18,320 --> 01:32:20,834
Just calm down.
You gon' get this dick.

1755
01:32:20,920 --> 01:32:22,558
Gonna drop some good dick on you.

1756
01:32:22,680 --> 01:32:24,193
Well, hurry.

1757
01:32:24,280 --> 01:32:25,873
- Oh.
- Yeah.

1758
01:32:25,960 --> 01:32:28,031
Yeah.

1759
01:32:28,120 --> 01:32:32,990
You see it.
You see it. Yeah.

1760
01:32:33,080 --> 01:32:35,117
Say you're ready for me
to draw some dick O's.

1761
01:32:38,320 --> 01:32:40,675
<i>Yeah. Yeah. Oh-oh.</i>

1762
01:32:40,760 --> 01:32:42,751
<i>That's it?</i>

1763
01:32:42,840 --> 01:32:44,751
<i>You're kidding.</i>

1764
01:32:44,840 --> 01:32:47,480
Wait. I-I...
Damn, this was a long song.

1765
01:32:47,560 --> 01:32:48,880
- Wow.
- You did good. No, no, no.

1766
01:32:49,000 --> 01:32:50,877
What you wowing for?

1767
01:32:52,640 --> 01:32:54,278
<i>Who knocked it down, nigga?</i>

1768
01:32:56,600 --> 01:32:58,637
<i>Bitch ass!</i>

1769
01:34:26,280 --> 01:34:30,956
<i>This is Jack Mihoff
with today's latest buzz.</i>

1770
01:34:31,040 --> 01:34:34,192
<i>There has been reports
of a ragtag band</i>

1771
01:34:34,280 --> 01:34:38,513
<i>of Negro thug
vigilantes and a Mexican.</i>

1772
01:34:38,600 --> 01:34:42,559
<i>Reports have been stated
that they are calling themselves</i>

1773
01:34:42,640 --> 01:34:45,314
<i>the Ghetto Ghostbusters,</i>

1774
01:34:45,400 --> 01:34:49,155
<i>and they are out for street vengeance.</i>