1
00:00:23,980 --> 00:00:26,461
I am the matriarch
of a great American

2
00:00:26,591 --> 00:00:29,029
family taking on the
ultimate challenge--

3
00:00:29,159 --> 00:00:31,118
the perfect family meal.

4
00:00:31,248 --> 00:00:32,423
 I understand, Mama Clara.

5
00:00:32,554 --> 00:00:34,034
 Working in a small
takeout franchise

6
00:00:34,164 --> 00:00:37,298
is traditionally a gateway
to bigger and better things.

7
00:00:37,428 --> 00:00:38,342
 I understand, Mama Clara.

8
00:00:38,473 --> 00:00:39,517
 You create synergies.

9
00:00:39,648 --> 00:00:40,953
You solve problems.

10
00:00:41,084 --> 00:00:42,564
 I understand, Mama Clara.

11
00:00:42,694 --> 00:00:45,262
 But that is what happens
when I go to the bathroom,

12
00:00:45,393 --> 00:00:47,699
and leave you in charge
of the french fries.

13
00:00:47,830 --> 00:00:49,092
 Well, give me another chance.

14
00:00:49,223 --> 00:00:52,052
[boom] Give your Uncle
Bob another chance.

15
00:00:52,182 --> 00:00:54,880
 Bob, you're no
uncle, and I'm no mama.

16
00:00:55,011 --> 00:00:57,231
The cute names are company
policy, that's all.

17
00:00:57,361 --> 00:01:00,016
Just-- feel good stuff,
so they can pay you less.

18
00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:00,886
 But we're a family.

19
00:01:01,017 --> 00:01:02,758
Look around!
- Oh!

20
00:01:02,888 --> 00:01:03,759
[screaming]

21
00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:04,716
 Dad!

22
00:01:04,847 --> 00:01:05,717
[screaming]

23
00:01:05,848 --> 00:01:06,588
 Are you OK?

24
00:01:06,718 --> 00:01:08,372
 Dad?

25
00:01:08,503 --> 00:01:09,808
We're a family.

26
00:01:09,939 --> 00:01:12,028
 This is my real father, Bob.

27
00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:15,336
There's a difference.

28
00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:17,773
[radio chatter]

29
00:01:22,386 --> 00:01:25,172
[sirens]

30
00:01:27,826 --> 00:01:29,176
SINGER: Time is drifting.

31
00:01:29,306 --> 00:01:32,179
This rock has got to roll.

32
00:01:32,309 --> 00:01:37,227
So I hit the road
and made my getaway.

33
00:01:37,358 --> 00:01:40,012
Restless feeling, we gotta go.

34
00:01:40,143 --> 00:01:41,797
 Sorry.

35
00:01:41,927 --> 00:01:45,627
SINGER: I started
searching for a better way.

36
00:01:50,588 --> 00:01:52,764
 No, no, no!

37
00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:53,896
No!
No!

38
00:01:54,026 --> 00:01:54,636
No!
Stop!

39
00:01:54,766 --> 00:01:55,419
Stop!
Stop!

40
00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:56,768
Stop!
[horn]

41
00:01:56,899 --> 00:01:57,639
 Stop!

42
00:02:02,296 --> 00:02:04,167
 Help!

43
00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:07,127
Help!

44
00:02:07,257 --> 00:02:09,346
 Grab onto this rope here.

45
00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:11,131
Pull it.

46
00:02:11,261 --> 00:02:12,306
[screaming]

47
00:02:16,658 --> 00:02:17,441
[giggling]

48
00:02:20,488 --> 00:02:22,664
 Hi, people.

49
00:02:22,794 --> 00:02:23,621
[pop]

50
00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:26,668
 Oh, save the fishies.
Save the fishies!

51
00:02:26,798 --> 00:02:28,496
Save the fishies!
Save the fishes!

52
00:02:28,626 --> 00:02:29,453
Save the--

53
00:02:37,548 --> 00:02:38,375
[beeping]

54
00:02:38,506 --> 00:02:40,812
[screeching]

55
00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:48,690
 I'm an astronaut.
I'm a ballerina.

56
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:49,691
I'm an astronaut.

57
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:52,215
I'm a ballerina.

58
00:02:52,346 --> 00:02:54,696
[crying]

59
00:03:06,838 --> 00:03:08,013
 Shave, shave, shave--

60
00:03:08,144 --> 00:03:08,927
[screaming]

61
00:03:09,058 --> 00:03:11,321
 Sorry.

62
00:03:11,452 --> 00:03:15,673
SINGER: New York City
took me with the tide.

63
00:03:15,804 --> 00:03:17,197
[squishing]

64
00:03:18,241 --> 00:03:19,068
 Ha.

65
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,548
Sorry about that.

66
00:03:28,643 --> 00:03:29,557
[screaming]

67
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:30,949
 Oh.

68
00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:41,525
 Huh I'm gonna
need a bigger board.

69
00:03:44,528 --> 00:03:46,704
It's not a big deal, Rascal.

70
00:03:46,835 --> 00:03:49,359
We're only on the B's, remember?

71
00:03:49,490 --> 00:03:51,013
We've got all this to go.

72
00:03:51,143 --> 00:03:53,058
OK, so we did burger assistant.

73
00:03:53,189 --> 00:03:54,886
Next up we have--

74
00:03:55,017 --> 00:03:56,671
business consulting.

75
00:03:56,801 --> 00:03:57,628
Butcher?

76
00:03:57,759 --> 00:04:00,065
[squeaking]

77
00:04:00,196 --> 00:04:01,328
Hey, listen to this.

78
00:04:01,458 --> 00:04:03,460
Listen.

79
00:04:03,591 --> 00:04:06,202
Cosmopolitan butler school.

80
00:04:06,333 --> 00:04:09,249
Become part of a
family in five days.

81
00:04:09,379 --> 00:04:12,817
Rascal-- we're going butling.

82
00:04:33,447 --> 00:04:34,274
[buzzer]

83
00:04:38,452 --> 00:04:39,844
 Do you think you're
gonna be a lassie?

84
00:04:43,195 --> 00:04:44,196
 9: 30?

85
00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:45,633
[whistle]

86
00:04:47,722 --> 00:04:49,550
 Good morning, students.

87
00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:50,420
 Good morning, sir.

88
00:04:50,551 --> 00:04:51,639
 Good morning, sir.

89
00:04:51,769 --> 00:04:52,770
 Two lines, please.

90
00:04:52,901 --> 00:04:55,773
[clapping] Take up.

91
00:04:55,904 --> 00:04:58,123
My name is Butler.

92
00:04:58,254 --> 00:05:00,691
I'm a born butler, in
all senses of the phrase.

93
00:05:00,822 --> 00:05:03,085
I come from a long
line of butlers.

94
00:05:03,215 --> 00:05:06,131
In only five days,
you will each receive

95
00:05:06,262 --> 00:05:09,613
a certificate of competence
to wait on any family

96
00:05:09,744 --> 00:05:11,398
on this side of the pond.

97
00:05:11,528 --> 00:05:13,356
For those of you
that are interested,

98
00:05:13,487 --> 00:05:16,707
the full English course,
lasting for the 17 years,

99
00:05:16,838 --> 00:05:19,493
standards are slightly higher.

100
00:05:19,623 --> 00:05:22,713
So, what does a butler do?

101
00:05:22,844 --> 00:05:24,149
Hm?

102
00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:26,587
Answer-- anything.

103
00:05:26,717 --> 00:05:30,373
He must cook, clean, tend
the garden, groom the horses,

104
00:05:30,504 --> 00:05:33,289
write letters, iron shirts,
arrange appointments,

105
00:05:33,420 --> 00:05:37,859
greet guests, run barbes,
buy groceries, pack cases,

106
00:05:37,989 --> 00:05:42,603
unpack cases, make reservations,
cancel reservations, and still

107
00:05:42,733 --> 00:05:45,388
find time to be a confidant.

108
00:05:45,519 --> 00:05:46,694
Understood?

109
00:05:46,824 --> 00:05:47,651
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.

110
00:05:47,782 --> 00:05:48,522
 Yes, sir.

111
00:05:51,394 --> 00:05:56,051
 Grooming is crucial
to the [inaudible].

112
00:05:56,181 --> 00:06:00,360
Substantial facial hair
is quite unacceptable.

113
00:06:00,490 --> 00:06:02,318
Rabbi, how would you serve soup?

114
00:06:02,449 --> 00:06:03,319
Well, I--

115
00:06:03,450 --> 00:06:05,887
 Either it goes, or you go.

116
00:06:06,017 --> 00:06:06,801
 Oh.

117
00:06:09,804 --> 00:06:13,024
 Butlers must be
immaculately dressed.

118
00:06:13,155 --> 00:06:16,332
So what's your excuse, you
miserable heap of mess?

119
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:17,812
 This is me tidy.

120
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,727
 Not in my book.

121
00:06:19,857 --> 00:06:23,034
Do you possess any
offensively tasteless tattoos

122
00:06:23,165 --> 00:06:26,473
perpetrated in a drunken haze?

123
00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:28,039
 No.

124
00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:30,781
 Any piercings of body parts?

125
00:06:30,912 --> 00:06:32,783
 I do have a series of
small holes in my tongue

126
00:06:32,914 --> 00:06:34,219
from when I was six.

127
00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:36,483
My cousin, he gave me a
black sea urchin thing,

128
00:06:36,613 --> 00:06:39,355
and told me it was
a chocolate muffin.

129
00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:43,881
I think they've grown over.

130
00:06:44,012 --> 00:06:46,710
Show me your nipples.

131
00:06:46,841 --> 00:06:48,495
 My nipples?

132
00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:49,365
 Yes.

133
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:50,279
Your nipples.

134
00:06:56,459 --> 00:06:58,809
Hm.

135
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,245
Can't blame a man for asking.

136
00:07:00,376 --> 00:07:02,857
Frankly, you look
the weird sort.

137
00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:03,727
 I'm weird?

138
00:07:23,965 --> 00:07:24,705
 Come on.

139
00:07:24,835 --> 00:07:25,619
Come on.

140
00:07:27,838 --> 00:07:28,622
Tess.

141
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:29,492
Tess.

142
00:07:35,977 --> 00:07:38,458
This elevator has already left.

143
00:07:38,588 --> 00:07:39,371
Sop that!

144
00:07:39,502 --> 00:07:40,416
You're causing a delay.

145
00:07:40,547 --> 00:07:41,722
 I have an important meeting.

146
00:07:41,852 --> 00:07:42,897
 If it was so
important, you would

147
00:07:43,027 --> 00:07:44,507
have left earlier, like I did.

148
00:07:44,638 --> 00:07:46,422
 Mother, you're
embarrassing us.

149
00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:47,336
 Stop.

150
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,512
Stop!

151
00:07:49,643 --> 00:07:50,426
 Witch!

152
00:07:50,557 --> 00:07:52,341
 What a rude person.

153
00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:53,211
 Suck up.

154
00:07:56,432 --> 00:07:57,477
 Any news Judith?

155
00:07:57,607 --> 00:07:58,782
 Not yet.

156
00:07:58,913 --> 00:08:00,305
 OK.

157
00:08:00,436 --> 00:08:01,176
Kate.

158
00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:07,791
- All right, go.
- Mr. Dickens called.

159
00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:08,836
Urgent.
- Skip.

160
00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:10,315
Next.

161
00:08:10,446 --> 00:08:11,360
 Makes the investment
conference call urgent.

162
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:12,927
 Safe.
Next.

163
00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:14,798
 Jacques called about
dinner on Monday.

164
00:08:14,929 --> 00:08:15,669
 Confirm.

165
00:08:15,799 --> 00:08:17,584
8:00.

166
00:08:17,714 --> 00:08:20,195
 It's them.

167
00:08:20,325 --> 00:08:21,370
 OK.
Put 'em through.

168
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,284
 Good luck.

169
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:28,551
 A word or two about money.

170
00:08:28,682 --> 00:08:30,727
Money makes the world
go round, doesn't it?

171
00:08:30,858 --> 00:08:31,772
 Yes, Mr. Butler.

172
00:08:31,902 --> 00:08:33,469
 Balderdash.

173
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:37,386
Trust, not money-- that's
what makes the world go round.

174
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:40,345
If I haven't been able
to produce at least

175
00:08:40,476 --> 00:08:44,045
one trustworthy butler
out of this course,

176
00:08:44,175 --> 00:08:45,220
then I've wasted my time.

177
00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:46,134
 Ah-- sorry.

178
00:08:46,264 --> 00:08:47,048
Sorry!

179
00:08:47,178 --> 00:08:48,658
[clattering]

180
00:08:48,789 --> 00:08:50,747
 As I've made clear, you
will be in complete control

181
00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:52,532
of the household.

182
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:55,273
However, you will be treated by
other members of the household

183
00:08:55,404 --> 00:08:57,972
as if you were slightly less
significant than a piece

184
00:08:58,102 --> 00:08:59,800
of used toilet paper.

185
00:08:59,930 --> 00:09:04,761
To simulate this, I've devised a
rather amusing little exercise.

186
00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:07,111
[shouting]

187
00:09:10,593 --> 00:09:12,247
 You're enjoying
this, aren't you?

188
00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:14,989
 I'm getting no pleasure
from it whatsoever!

189
00:09:15,119 --> 00:09:17,600
 Yeah, right.

190
00:09:17,731 --> 00:09:19,471
 Bullseye!

191
00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:26,435
Now look-- open wide for one
teeny, weeny little baked bean,

192
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,524
or I'll tell your mom.

193
00:09:28,655 --> 00:09:30,874
 But I'll tell her you hit me.

194
00:09:31,005 --> 00:09:32,354
 What?

195
00:09:32,484 --> 00:09:36,314
 I'll tell her you hit
me and pulled my hair.

196
00:09:36,445 --> 00:09:38,099
[screaming]
- OK.

197
00:09:38,229 --> 00:09:39,274
Leave the food.

198
00:09:39,404 --> 00:09:41,668
 Can I watch TV tonight?

199
00:09:41,798 --> 00:09:45,889
 I will not be blackmailed
by you children.

200
00:09:46,020 --> 00:09:48,718
[screaming]

201
00:09:57,727 --> 00:09:58,467
[sigh]

202
00:09:59,773 --> 00:10:00,948
 Mrs. Withington,
what happened?

203
00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:07,955
 Sorry, Miss Jamieson, but
they are the devil's seed.

204
00:10:08,085 --> 00:10:10,566
 Oh, no, they're
just playing with you.

205
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:11,698
They're delightful children.

206
00:10:11,828 --> 00:10:13,221
Really.

207
00:10:13,351 --> 00:10:14,396
Underneath all the
horrible stuff.

208
00:10:14,526 --> 00:10:15,919
Please.

209
00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,834
I promised Jacques I would
not let him down again.

210
00:10:17,965 --> 00:10:18,748
[chuckling]

211
00:10:31,326 --> 00:10:33,633
[mumbling]

212
00:10:38,768 --> 00:10:41,118
[phone ringing]

213
00:10:43,730 --> 00:10:44,818
 Hello?

214
00:10:44,948 --> 00:10:47,385
- Bob the babysitter?
- No, ma'am.

215
00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:49,692
This is Bob the Butler.

216
00:10:49,823 --> 00:10:51,346
 Now, look, I definitely
have this number

217
00:10:51,476 --> 00:10:53,740
down for Bob the babysitter.

218
00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:55,959
 Well, that was at
least seven jobs back.

219
00:10:56,090 --> 00:10:59,310
 But you were a
babysitter once?

220
00:10:59,441 --> 00:11:00,877
 Well, yes.

221
00:11:01,008 --> 00:11:02,052
Just once.

222
00:11:02,183 --> 00:11:03,967
 Oh, please, this
is an emergency.

223
00:11:04,098 --> 00:11:06,535
 One minute, please.

224
00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:09,799
Rascal-- damsel in distress.

225
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:12,280
May I have your leave?

226
00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:13,629
Thank you, Master Rascal.

227
00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:19,635
I'd be happy to.

228
00:11:19,766 --> 00:11:22,116
[engine stalling]

229
00:11:33,257 --> 00:11:35,129
[knocking]

230
00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:37,566
 Oh.

231
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:38,436
My.

232
00:11:38,567 --> 00:11:39,394
Are you Bob?

233
00:11:39,524 --> 00:11:42,005
 At your service.

234
00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:43,964
 You have a piece of
tomato in your hair.

235
00:11:44,094 --> 00:11:48,925
 Oh-- Ugh.

236
00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,666
 Gone.

237
00:11:50,797 --> 00:11:51,711
 OK, well, um--

238
00:11:51,841 --> 00:11:53,451
I want you to meet my children.

239
00:11:53,582 --> 00:11:56,193
This is my daughter, Tess.

240
00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:57,325
 Miss Tess.

241
00:11:57,455 --> 00:11:58,282
Hello.

242
00:11:58,413 --> 00:11:59,196
lovely name.

243
00:11:59,327 --> 00:12:00,284
 My son, Bates.

244
00:12:00,415 --> 00:12:01,155
 Mm.

245
00:12:01,285 --> 00:12:04,201
Master-- Bates.

246
00:12:04,332 --> 00:12:05,812
 OK.

247
00:12:05,942 --> 00:12:12,253
I have to go, so do me a
favor, and do not hurt him.

248
00:12:12,383 --> 00:12:13,950
Bob, please don't sit
on any of the nice

249
00:12:14,081 --> 00:12:14,951
chairs unless you have to.

250
00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:16,736
 OK.

251
00:12:16,866 --> 00:12:19,651
 Goodnight, children.

252
00:12:19,782 --> 00:12:21,044
Goodnight, Mother.

253
00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:23,743
Enjoy your romantic evening out.
- Have fun.

254
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:34,144
 Don't forget the
back ones, master.

255
00:12:34,275 --> 00:12:36,190
 Why do you call me master?

256
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:38,279
 I'm studying to be a butler.

257
00:12:38,409 --> 00:12:40,847
 I don't like it.

258
00:12:40,977 --> 00:12:44,024
Master Bates just feels wrong.

259
00:12:44,154 --> 00:12:45,765
 Indeed.

260
00:12:45,895 --> 00:12:46,983
How about I call you Bates?

261
00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:51,161
- I like that.
- Yeah.

262
00:12:51,292 --> 00:12:51,988
Just Bates.

263
00:12:58,516 --> 00:13:03,478
[humming] Nice chair.

264
00:13:12,922 --> 00:13:14,228
 Bates?

265
00:13:14,358 --> 00:13:15,403
Are you awake?

266
00:13:15,533 --> 00:13:17,492
 When will Mom be back?

267
00:13:17,622 --> 00:13:20,103
 You think Bob's a real find?

268
00:13:20,234 --> 00:13:22,802
 He let me sleep in
my fireman costume.

269
00:13:22,932 --> 00:13:24,368
 He's crazy.

270
00:13:24,499 --> 00:13:27,632
 I like him more
than Mrs. Withington.

271
00:13:27,763 --> 00:13:29,243
Would you like
to have him back?

272
00:13:29,373 --> 00:13:30,766
 Can we?

273
00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:31,680
 Leave it to me.

274
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,606
 Thanks for a lovely evening.

275
00:13:44,736 --> 00:13:46,956
 Ah, the pleasure was all mine.

276
00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:47,870
 I'd invite you up, but--

277
00:13:48,001 --> 00:13:49,045
 I know.

278
00:13:49,176 --> 00:13:50,742
The children will
be up, as usual.

279
00:13:53,354 --> 00:13:54,181
 Oh my god!

280
00:13:54,311 --> 00:13:55,399
 What-- what's wrong?

281
00:13:55,530 --> 00:13:56,531
 The childrens'
lights are all out!

282
00:14:07,194 --> 00:14:08,151
What's wrong?

283
00:14:08,282 --> 00:14:09,587
 Nothing.

284
00:14:09,718 --> 00:14:10,675
They've been good as gold.

285
00:14:10,806 --> 00:14:12,068
 Oh, cut the BS.

286
00:14:12,199 --> 00:14:14,505
What, are they bound
and gagged somewhere?

287
00:14:14,636 --> 00:14:16,116
 You really should be
congratulated, ma'am,

288
00:14:16,246 --> 00:14:19,684
on raising such
wondrous progeny.

289
00:14:19,815 --> 00:14:21,730
Can I go now?

290
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:24,341
Normally they're, uh--

291
00:14:24,472 --> 00:14:26,343
a pain in the derriere.

292
00:14:26,474 --> 00:14:28,432
I think here you say brats.

293
00:14:28,563 --> 00:14:29,346
 Oh.

294
00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:31,087
I never say brats.

295
00:14:31,218 --> 00:14:33,176
 Well, I don't know
what you did, but--

296
00:14:33,307 --> 00:14:34,743
I'm impressed.

297
00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:36,876
Well, Jacques, will
you pay Bob for me?

298
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:37,746
 Of course.

299
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:46,494
I'm, uh-- tipping you
very generously here.

300
00:14:46,624 --> 00:14:49,366
I want you to know why.

301
00:14:49,497 --> 00:14:54,154
Tonight, with the kids in
bed, all night I get to do

302
00:14:54,284 --> 00:14:58,071
what Frenchmen love to do most.

303
00:14:58,201 --> 00:15:01,422
 You're going to look in
the mirror for eight hours?

304
00:15:01,552 --> 00:15:02,336
Thanks, Jack.

305
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:07,254
 This morning, those
of us that remain

306
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:10,126
will address the basic skills
required for a typical day,

307
00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:13,564
starting with
undressing the master.

308
00:15:13,695 --> 00:15:14,914
Now, I shall need a volunteer.

309
00:15:15,044 --> 00:15:16,002
Mr. Tree, please.

310
00:15:19,701 --> 00:15:20,484
Jacket?

311
00:15:23,574 --> 00:15:25,489
Good.

312
00:15:25,620 --> 00:15:26,403
Tie?

313
00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:30,364
Waistcoat?

314
00:15:30,494 --> 00:15:31,408
Or vest, to you.

315
00:15:37,893 --> 00:15:40,113
Shirt?

316
00:15:40,243 --> 00:15:41,331
 Aw, come on.

317
00:15:41,462 --> 00:15:42,898
Haven't you got
some kind of dummy?

318
00:15:43,029 --> 00:15:44,856
 Dear boy, if you
intend to be a butler,

319
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:48,034
you'd better get used
to naked old flesh.

320
00:15:48,164 --> 00:15:49,818
 Are you sure this
isn't a British thing?

321
00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:52,255
I mean, most Americans know
how to dress themselves.

322
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,214
 On the contrary.

323
00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:57,739
We are here to educate
them to do it better.

324
00:15:57,869 --> 00:16:00,394
And to dress for
the right occasion.

325
00:16:00,524 --> 00:16:01,351
 Whoa!

326
00:16:01,482 --> 00:16:04,702
Yo, I'm outta here.

327
00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:11,709
 Well, Bob, you seem
to be the last one left.

328
00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:13,842
 Mr. Butler, I don't really
know if this is necessary.

329
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:17,541
I mean, I'll give you $100
if you leave the rest on.

330
00:16:17,672 --> 00:16:18,455
150.

331
00:16:18,586 --> 00:16:20,327
1,000.

332
00:16:20,457 --> 00:16:23,330
Please stop there.

333
00:16:23,460 --> 00:16:25,810
 Dress me.

334
00:16:25,941 --> 00:16:27,290
 Bob?
No.

335
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:28,422
No.
- It's OK.

336
00:16:28,552 --> 00:16:29,901
It's OK, Nico.

337
00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:31,077
I don't want to work here.

338
00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:33,079
I can't stand the
sight of blood.

339
00:16:33,209 --> 00:16:34,819
And all that screaming.

340
00:16:34,950 --> 00:16:36,778
 You took the
guy's earlobe off.

341
00:16:36,908 --> 00:16:38,867
 Well, not on purpose.

342
00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,042
You used to work here?

343
00:16:40,173 --> 00:16:41,783
 Of course I used to work here.

344
00:16:41,913 --> 00:16:44,829
Barber comes before butler
in the yellow pages.

345
00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,135
 So, how do you like it?

346
00:16:46,266 --> 00:16:48,485
 Neat and tidy.

347
00:16:48,616 --> 00:16:50,357
 As the man says.

348
00:16:50,487 --> 00:16:52,185
 No beard.

349
00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:53,447
 No beard?

350
00:16:53,577 --> 00:16:55,362
 Butlers don't have beards.

351
00:16:55,492 --> 00:16:56,885
 Butlers wear beards.

352
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,539
- No beard.
- A bit of beard.

353
00:16:58,669 --> 00:16:59,453
 No beard at all.

354
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:00,671
 Itty bit of beard?

355
00:17:00,802 --> 00:17:02,586
 No beard whatever.

356
00:17:02,717 --> 00:17:03,979
 Itsy bit of beard?

357
00:17:04,110 --> 00:17:05,589
 Nope.

358
00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:06,982
Not even a little, bitty,
bitty, weeny bit of beard.

359
00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:08,549
 Itty bit of butler beard?
Beardless.

360
00:17:08,679 --> 00:17:09,593
 Itty bit of butler beard.

361
00:17:09,724 --> 00:17:10,768
No beard.

362
00:17:10,899 --> 00:17:11,769
 Itty bit of butler beard.

363
00:17:11,900 --> 00:17:12,988
Itty bit of butler beard.

364
00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:14,337
Itty bit of butler beard.

365
00:17:14,468 --> 00:17:15,730
Settled.

366
00:17:15,860 --> 00:17:18,385
So-- pretty much as it is.

367
00:17:22,737 --> 00:17:26,784
 What do you expect to do,
Bob, if this doesn't work out?

368
00:17:26,915 --> 00:17:28,569
 I'll probably
move on to the C's.

369
00:17:28,699 --> 00:17:35,358
You know, camping guy,
carpet cleaner, car washer--

370
00:17:35,489 --> 00:17:36,881
computer hacker.

371
00:17:37,012 --> 00:17:38,405
 Extraordinary.

372
00:17:38,535 --> 00:17:41,930
You seem to have such
faith in yourself,

373
00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:45,977
where none is justified.

374
00:17:46,108 --> 00:17:47,240
 Thanks, Mr. Butler.

375
00:17:50,373 --> 00:17:51,200
 Well, well, well.

376
00:17:58,338 --> 00:17:59,774
A gentleman's gentleman.

377
00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:00,688
By George.

378
00:18:04,344 --> 00:18:09,131
 Loving breaths of deep--

379
00:18:09,262 --> 00:18:10,176
acceptance.

380
00:18:10,306 --> 00:18:11,046
Ah.

381
00:18:16,530 --> 00:18:19,402
 All right, can we
speed it up, please?

382
00:18:19,533 --> 00:18:21,665
Here's my needs analysis.

383
00:18:21,796 --> 00:18:22,710
I think it'll save time.

384
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:24,538
 What are you saving time for?

385
00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:26,148
Your family?

386
00:18:26,279 --> 00:18:28,150
But you don't even have
time to enjoy your kids.

387
00:18:28,281 --> 00:18:29,020
Or Jacques.

388
00:18:29,151 --> 00:18:32,372
 Jack's not family.

389
00:18:32,502 --> 00:18:34,635
 There's too much work.

390
00:18:34,765 --> 00:18:35,592
I need more time.

391
00:18:35,723 --> 00:18:38,334
 Remember your mantra.

392
00:18:38,465 --> 00:18:40,858
 I cannot organize the world.

393
00:18:40,989 --> 00:18:43,383
Blah, blah, blah.

394
00:18:43,513 --> 00:18:45,167
 Maybe you could
work just as hard,

395
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:48,344
and find someone who brings
the best out of me and Bates?

396
00:18:48,475 --> 00:18:52,174
 Tess, that is a very
sensible suggestion.

397
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:53,828
Do you have anyone in mind?

398
00:18:53,958 --> 00:18:55,569
 Not really.

399
00:18:55,699 --> 00:19:01,618
 Well-- I quite liked the
babysitter we had last night.

400
00:19:01,749 --> 00:19:04,404
 But Tess said he was freaky.

401
00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:05,622
 He's too strict.

402
00:19:05,753 --> 00:19:07,581
 He's way too strict.

403
00:19:07,711 --> 00:19:09,148
 Definitely not him.

404
00:19:09,278 --> 00:19:11,715
 Eh--

405
00:19:11,846 --> 00:19:13,630
 Well, it's not
your call, children.

406
00:19:24,206 --> 00:19:25,207
- What are we doing?
- Come on.

407
00:19:25,338 --> 00:19:26,121
Come on.

408
00:19:26,252 --> 00:19:28,036
Come on.

409
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:28,993
Up you go.

410
00:19:33,084 --> 00:19:35,217
Standing still,
Mr. Tree, is highly

411
00:19:35,348 --> 00:19:38,264
prized in butler circles.

412
00:19:38,394 --> 00:19:39,134
 Freak.

413
00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:40,048
 Just get up.

414
00:19:42,703 --> 00:19:44,008
 Tiny people down below.

415
00:19:48,665 --> 00:19:50,885
[heavy breathing]

416
00:19:54,802 --> 00:19:56,107
 Good.

417
00:19:56,238 --> 00:19:58,762
I want you to clear
your mind, and relax.

418
00:19:58,893 --> 00:20:00,764
 Relax?

419
00:20:00,895 --> 00:20:02,157
Are you kidding me?

420
00:20:02,288 --> 00:20:05,943
I'm standing inches from
certain death, here.

421
00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:07,554
 I'll tell you what--
think of the most

422
00:20:07,684 --> 00:20:11,732
beautiful thing you've
seen of the last 48 hours.

423
00:20:11,862 --> 00:20:13,473
Now, come on.

424
00:20:13,603 --> 00:20:14,865
You can do it.

425
00:20:14,996 --> 00:20:18,391
I'm beginning to have
faith in you, Bob.

426
00:20:18,521 --> 00:20:19,392
 OK.

427
00:20:19,522 --> 00:20:20,306
I've got it.

428
00:20:20,436 --> 00:20:22,003
 What is it?

429
00:20:22,133 --> 00:20:24,005
 It's a woman.

430
00:20:24,135 --> 00:20:24,962
 Can you picture her?

431
00:20:27,965 --> 00:20:29,576
 Yes.

432
00:20:29,706 --> 00:20:30,751
 Excellent.

433
00:20:30,881 --> 00:20:32,666
Hold that thought.

434
00:20:53,208 --> 00:20:54,078
 Hey, kiddo.

435
00:20:54,209 --> 00:20:56,951
How was your day?
- OK.

436
00:20:57,081 --> 00:20:58,735
 Just OK?

437
00:20:58,866 --> 00:20:59,780
 Well, mine was pretty good.

438
00:20:59,910 --> 00:21:01,303
Do you want to hear about it?

439
00:21:01,434 --> 00:21:03,740
Does it have anything
with campaign management?

440
00:21:03,871 --> 00:21:04,654
 Yes.

441
00:21:04,785 --> 00:21:05,568
 No.

442
00:21:15,709 --> 00:21:17,885
 It's polite to knock.

443
00:21:18,015 --> 00:21:19,713
 It's bedtime, sweetheart.

444
00:21:19,843 --> 00:21:21,018
 I haven't finished.

445
00:21:21,149 --> 00:21:23,194
 Now, please.

446
00:21:23,325 --> 00:21:24,108
 No.

447
00:21:32,073 --> 00:21:35,119
 Ah, that's just what I need.

448
00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:37,296
Thank you.

449
00:21:37,426 --> 00:21:39,254
Do you want to
hear about my day?

450
00:21:39,385 --> 00:21:41,038
 Now?

451
00:21:41,169 --> 00:21:43,867
Your mind is full
of work and kids,

452
00:21:43,998 --> 00:21:47,349
work and kids, work and kids.

453
00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:48,916
That leaves little for me.

454
00:21:49,046 --> 00:21:51,658
 I am trying to sell
my business, Jacques.

455
00:21:51,788 --> 00:21:53,486
 For months, mon cheri.

456
00:21:53,616 --> 00:21:55,749
But when?

457
00:21:55,879 --> 00:21:58,012
- I'm thinking of hiring Bob.
- The babysitter?

458
00:21:58,142 --> 00:21:58,926
 The butler.

459
00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:04,497
Are you sure you
want to live with you?

460
00:22:04,627 --> 00:22:05,976
I'm joking.

461
00:22:06,107 --> 00:22:07,804
 No, he'll live in the attic.

462
00:22:07,935 --> 00:22:10,677
We'll have a babysitter
whenever we want.

463
00:22:10,807 --> 00:22:13,070
 Perfect.

464
00:22:13,201 --> 00:22:14,507
[knocking]

465
00:22:14,637 --> 00:22:16,509
 Can you hurry up in there?

466
00:22:16,639 --> 00:22:18,162
You've been in there for hours?

467
00:22:18,293 --> 00:22:19,076
MAN: Almost finished.

468
00:22:27,650 --> 00:22:29,348
 He'll tidy all this up?

469
00:22:29,478 --> 00:22:30,349
 Yeah.

470
00:22:30,479 --> 00:22:31,741
 Bates, stop that.

471
00:22:31,872 --> 00:22:33,395
It's a toilet bidet.

472
00:22:33,526 --> 00:22:35,136
 What's a toilet bidet?

473
00:22:35,266 --> 00:22:36,442
 It's like a
fountain for your a--

474
00:22:36,572 --> 00:22:38,618
 Ask me later.

475
00:22:38,748 --> 00:22:40,881
 Jack says he's here.

476
00:22:41,011 --> 00:22:42,230
 The butler!

477
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:43,753
 Now, then, Robert--

478
00:22:43,884 --> 00:22:45,538
 Actually, my name's Bob.

479
00:22:45,668 --> 00:22:47,888
 Oh, well, Bob is
short for Robert.

480
00:22:48,018 --> 00:22:50,499
 Isn't Rob short for Robert?

481
00:22:50,630 --> 00:22:51,848
 Yes.

482
00:22:51,979 --> 00:22:53,023
 So, then Bob would
be short for Bobert.

483
00:22:53,154 --> 00:22:54,416
 Your name is Bobert?

484
00:22:54,547 --> 00:22:55,286
 No.

485
00:22:55,417 --> 00:22:56,287
Just Bob.

486
00:22:56,418 --> 00:22:58,072
 OK, then.

487
00:22:58,202 --> 00:22:59,943
As long as we're satisfied with
first names, can we continue?

488
00:23:00,074 --> 00:23:01,031
 Of course.

489
00:23:01,162 --> 00:23:02,555
Though I don't know your name.

490
00:23:02,685 --> 00:23:04,426
Is it all right if I call
you Mistress Jamieson?

491
00:23:04,557 --> 00:23:07,516
 Oh-- [laughter] No.

492
00:23:07,647 --> 00:23:09,910
That sounds rather
sordid, doesn't it?

493
00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:13,348
Perhaps you could
just call me Anne?

494
00:23:13,479 --> 00:23:14,784
 Anne?

495
00:23:14,915 --> 00:23:16,525
 Just Anne.

496
00:23:16,656 --> 00:23:18,309
 Anne.

497
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:19,485
 Yes.

498
00:23:19,615 --> 00:23:20,355
Anne.

499
00:23:20,486 --> 00:23:21,269
 Bien.

500
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:22,662
 Anne.

501
00:23:22,792 --> 00:23:27,014
 Mr. Tree, how many
children do you have?

502
00:23:27,144 --> 00:23:28,885
 Well, I don't
have any children.

503
00:23:29,016 --> 00:23:31,671
 But you said in the flier
that you would take care

504
00:23:31,801 --> 00:23:33,107
of the children like your own.

505
00:23:33,237 --> 00:23:36,066
 Yeah, if I had some.

506
00:23:36,197 --> 00:23:38,242
 But you did just
recently attend the,

507
00:23:38,373 --> 00:23:40,680
uh, Cosmopolitan Butler School?

508
00:23:40,810 --> 00:23:41,942
 It's all tidy.

509
00:23:54,824 --> 00:23:56,347
 Ah, how much do I owe you?

510
00:24:08,577 --> 00:24:10,144
 What did he say?

511
00:24:10,274 --> 00:24:12,146
 Uh, he said he'll drop
the bill off next week.

512
00:24:15,671 --> 00:24:19,240
 Um-- Jacques got me
a wonderful present.

513
00:24:19,370 --> 00:24:21,851
A state of the art toilet.

514
00:24:21,982 --> 00:24:24,463
 A toilet?

515
00:24:24,593 --> 00:24:26,290
What a nice gift.

516
00:24:26,421 --> 00:24:27,901
[non-english speech]

517
00:24:31,774 --> 00:24:33,080
My goodness, Bob.

518
00:24:33,210 --> 00:24:35,691
I had no idea that you
were fluent in Japanese.

519
00:24:35,822 --> 00:24:37,519
 I worked in the Asian market.

520
00:24:37,650 --> 00:24:38,738
 Well, that's impressive.

521
00:24:38,868 --> 00:24:40,435
 You sold stock?

522
00:24:40,566 --> 00:24:47,094
 Stocks, vegetables, some
strangely shaped fruits.

523
00:24:47,224 --> 00:24:50,271
Horseshoe shaped fruits.

524
00:24:50,401 --> 00:24:54,144
 Bob, I would like to
go over a few specifics.

525
00:24:54,275 --> 00:24:55,537
I color categorize my sponges.

526
00:24:55,668 --> 00:24:56,886
 Hm?

527
00:24:57,017 --> 00:24:58,627
 Blue for bathroom,
yellow for kitchen,

528
00:24:58,758 --> 00:25:01,369
purple for general, green for
the outdoors-- car included.

529
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:02,457
Please don't confuse them.

530
00:25:02,588 --> 00:25:03,719
 Fine.

531
00:25:03,850 --> 00:25:05,112
- No strange women in the house.
- Fine.

532
00:25:05,242 --> 00:25:06,330
- No drugs.
- Fine.

533
00:25:06,461 --> 00:25:07,593
 No pets.

534
00:25:07,723 --> 00:25:09,246
 You allergic?

535
00:25:09,377 --> 00:25:11,248
 They're unhygenic.

536
00:25:11,379 --> 00:25:12,162
 Fine.

537
00:25:19,256 --> 00:25:20,736
 So, what do you think?

538
00:25:20,867 --> 00:25:22,738
 Well, he is very strange.

539
00:25:22,869 --> 00:25:24,740
I don't understand
this, uh, Rob--

540
00:25:24,871 --> 00:25:26,742
Bob-- Bobert business.

541
00:25:26,873 --> 00:25:27,830
 Well, I suppose
we could always

542
00:25:27,961 --> 00:25:29,266
interview other candidates.

543
00:25:29,397 --> 00:25:31,530
 There are other candidate?

544
00:25:31,660 --> 00:25:33,532
 No.

545
00:25:33,662 --> 00:25:36,012
[squeaking]

546
00:25:37,884 --> 00:25:39,668
 I hired an assistant once.

547
00:25:39,799 --> 00:25:41,278
She seemed perfect,
she worked hard, she

548
00:25:41,409 --> 00:25:43,237
did everything I told her to.

549
00:25:43,367 --> 00:25:45,892
One lunchtime, I
saw her in the gym.

550
00:25:46,022 --> 00:25:49,199
She had a shower, and then
she changed right back

551
00:25:49,330 --> 00:25:53,073
into her workout bra.

552
00:25:53,203 --> 00:25:54,422
 I'm lost.

553
00:25:54,553 --> 00:25:56,511
 I fired her on
the spot, of course.

554
00:25:56,642 --> 00:25:59,862
 You fired her because
of her sweaty bra?

555
00:25:59,993 --> 00:26:03,344
Do you think Bobert wears a bra?

556
00:26:03,474 --> 00:26:04,954
 Oh, who knows?

557
00:26:05,085 --> 00:26:06,956
But if it doesn't work
out, I'll change him.

558
00:26:07,087 --> 00:26:07,870
 OK.

559
00:26:11,308 --> 00:26:12,179
[squeaking]

560
00:26:12,309 --> 00:26:13,659
[glass shattering]

561
00:26:23,277 --> 00:26:24,060
 Bates!

562
00:26:27,150 --> 00:26:28,021
 Sorry, Mom.

563
00:26:31,198 --> 00:26:34,854
 I think you'll find that
it has everything you need.

564
00:26:34,984 --> 00:26:37,378
I'm sure it's not up to
your professional standards.

565
00:26:44,907 --> 00:26:48,781
 Well, it's-- white.

566
00:26:48,911 --> 00:26:49,695
Yeah.

567
00:26:49,825 --> 00:26:52,045
Uh-- oh--

568
00:26:52,175 --> 00:26:53,350
I'm sorry it is such a mess.

569
00:26:58,268 --> 00:27:00,183
I can, indeed,
organize the world.

570
00:27:14,241 --> 00:27:15,634
[squeaking]

571
00:27:15,764 --> 00:27:16,635
 Here, Rascal.

572
00:27:21,291 --> 00:27:22,075
Home.

573
00:27:26,732 --> 00:27:27,820
We are robot.

574
00:27:27,950 --> 00:27:30,910
We are monster robot.

575
00:27:31,040 --> 00:27:32,215
I am robot man.

576
00:27:32,346 --> 00:27:33,521
Get out of my way.

577
00:27:33,652 --> 00:27:34,914
I am computer man.

578
00:27:35,044 --> 00:27:37,220
 Aren't you a little
old to play with toys?

579
00:27:37,351 --> 00:27:40,876
 Well, I don't usually
play with them, but--

580
00:27:41,007 --> 00:27:44,401
I got these when I was
about your age, and--

581
00:27:44,532 --> 00:27:47,143
I figured I'd give them
to my own son one day.

582
00:27:47,274 --> 00:27:49,015
 Do you think he'd want them?

583
00:28:03,594 --> 00:28:05,466
 The children
are in bed, ma'am.

584
00:28:05,596 --> 00:28:06,380
 Thank you, Bob.

585
00:28:06,510 --> 00:28:08,034
Music to my ears.

586
00:28:08,164 --> 00:28:09,862
 Is there anything
else I can do for you?

587
00:28:09,992 --> 00:28:10,906
 No, thank you.

588
00:28:11,037 --> 00:28:12,691
I'll see you in the morning.

589
00:28:12,821 --> 00:28:15,128
 I hope you don't
mind, but, um--

590
00:28:15,258 --> 00:28:17,739
I couldn't find any
towels for your bathroom.

591
00:28:17,870 --> 00:28:18,653
 No.

592
00:28:18,784 --> 00:28:20,611
I don't use them.

593
00:28:20,742 --> 00:28:21,917
 OK, then.

594
00:28:22,048 --> 00:28:23,527
 They breed germs.

595
00:28:23,658 --> 00:28:24,746
I have a body dryer.

596
00:28:24,877 --> 00:28:25,878
 A body dryer?

597
00:28:26,008 --> 00:28:26,922
 Yes.

598
00:28:27,053 --> 00:28:29,142
 Like a hair dryer?

599
00:28:29,272 --> 00:28:30,447
 Bigger.

600
00:28:30,578 --> 00:28:32,885
Much more hygienic.

601
00:28:33,015 --> 00:28:34,538
Did I mention the sponge system?

602
00:28:34,669 --> 00:28:35,409
Blue for the bathroom--

603
00:28:35,539 --> 00:28:37,846
 Purple, yellow, green.

604
00:28:37,977 --> 00:28:38,847
 Oh.

605
00:28:38,978 --> 00:28:39,761
Well, goodnight, then.

606
00:28:43,373 --> 00:28:44,200
 Goodnight.

607
00:28:55,429 --> 00:28:56,778
[whirring]

608
00:28:59,912 --> 00:29:02,218
[sniffing]

609
00:29:07,789 --> 00:29:09,138
 What's that smell?

610
00:29:09,269 --> 00:29:10,400
 Cooking.

611
00:29:10,531 --> 00:29:11,793
 Real food?

612
00:29:11,924 --> 00:29:12,838
 Yeah.

613
00:29:12,968 --> 00:29:13,882
I guess Bob made us breakfast.

614
00:29:14,013 --> 00:29:15,579
Where did you get that blouse?

615
00:29:15,710 --> 00:29:17,190
 It's an old one.

616
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:18,191
 Yeah, like, really old.

617
00:29:18,321 --> 00:29:19,409
Like, five years too old.

618
00:29:19,540 --> 00:29:21,020
It's way too small for you.

619
00:29:21,150 --> 00:29:22,761
- It is not.
- Is.

620
00:29:22,891 --> 00:29:23,631
 Is not.

621
00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:24,719
 Let's have Bob decide.

622
00:29:24,850 --> 00:29:25,589
Bob?

623
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:26,503
 Is not.

624
00:29:26,634 --> 00:29:27,766
 Is.

625
00:29:27,896 --> 00:29:29,463
 Yes, ma'am?

626
00:29:29,593 --> 00:29:34,076
 Tess' blouse-- indecently
small, or acceptable fashion?

627
00:29:34,207 --> 00:29:35,469
 Sorry, Miss Tess.

628
00:29:43,782 --> 00:29:45,305
 That's a lot of pancakes.

629
00:29:45,435 --> 00:29:48,003
 It's more cost effective
to prepare in bulk.

630
00:29:48,134 --> 00:29:50,484
 They teach you that bulk
stuff at butler school?

631
00:29:50,614 --> 00:29:51,354
 Actually, at the finest--

632
00:29:54,705 --> 00:29:57,317
the finest cooking
school in the world.

633
00:29:57,447 --> 00:29:59,232
 The Cordon Bleu.

634
00:29:59,362 --> 00:30:00,363
 The US Army.

635
00:30:00,494 --> 00:30:01,712
 The army?

636
00:30:01,843 --> 00:30:03,410
Cool.

637
00:30:03,540 --> 00:30:05,020
 Would you like some
pancakes, Miss Tess?

638
00:30:05,151 --> 00:30:05,978
 Sure.

639
00:30:06,108 --> 00:30:07,196
Make me put on 50 pounds.

640
00:30:07,327 --> 00:30:08,545
That'll make me popular.

641
00:30:08,676 --> 00:30:10,939
 Getting grounded
for being rude

642
00:30:11,070 --> 00:30:12,245
will definitely
make you popular.

643
00:30:17,163 --> 00:30:18,904
 Miss Tess?

644
00:30:19,034 --> 00:30:21,428
I want to prepare a
special dinner tonight.

645
00:30:21,558 --> 00:30:22,951
Sort of an introduction.

646
00:30:23,082 --> 00:30:24,648
What does your mother like?

647
00:30:24,779 --> 00:30:26,346
 She likes anything
she can eat quickly,

648
00:30:26,476 --> 00:30:29,305
so she can get back to work.

649
00:30:29,436 --> 00:30:31,307
 You know what would be good?

650
00:30:31,438 --> 00:30:32,569
A luau.

651
00:30:32,700 --> 00:30:34,310
She loves the whole
Hawaiian thing.

652
00:30:34,441 --> 00:30:36,269
 A luau, huh?

653
00:30:36,399 --> 00:30:37,444
BATES: Pork?

654
00:30:37,574 --> 00:30:38,401
 OK.

655
00:30:38,532 --> 00:30:39,272
I'll look into that.

656
00:30:42,057 --> 00:30:44,668
I knew a guy once--

657
00:30:44,799 --> 00:30:47,541
He was kind of a nervous fellow.

658
00:30:47,671 --> 00:30:50,109
Used to bite his nails.

659
00:30:50,239 --> 00:30:52,894
One day he was so upset,
he ate his whole hand.

660
00:30:53,025 --> 00:30:54,461
 He did not.

661
00:30:54,591 --> 00:30:55,984
By the time we pulled
him off, he'd chewed

662
00:30:56,115 --> 00:30:57,464
all the way up to the elbows.

663
00:30:57,594 --> 00:30:58,769
 That is stupid.

664
00:30:58,900 --> 00:31:01,120
 That fella has to
wear a muzzle now.

665
00:31:01,250 --> 00:31:02,861
A muzzle!

666
00:31:02,991 --> 00:31:08,214
All because he couldn't
talk about his problems.

667
00:31:08,344 --> 00:31:10,216
I don't know about
that outfit, Miss Tess.

668
00:31:17,745 --> 00:31:18,746
Are you getting out?

669
00:31:18,877 --> 00:31:19,703
 Mm-mm.

670
00:31:19,834 --> 00:31:21,923
I've got basketball today.

671
00:31:22,054 --> 00:31:23,446
 That's great.

672
00:31:23,577 --> 00:31:25,579
I love basketball.

673
00:31:25,709 --> 00:31:26,972
 You're not under four foot.

674
00:31:30,497 --> 00:31:31,280
 Hey.

675
00:31:31,411 --> 00:31:32,194
 Hi.

676
00:31:34,805 --> 00:31:36,285
Guess what?

677
00:31:36,416 --> 00:31:38,635
 You joined the
Britney Spears fan club?

678
00:31:38,766 --> 00:31:41,290
 My mom hired a butler.

679
00:31:41,421 --> 00:31:43,423
 He looks like he's
from Transylvania.

680
00:31:43,553 --> 00:31:46,513
 He's not the only one.

681
00:31:46,643 --> 00:31:48,907
They remind me of
the Addams family.

682
00:31:49,037 --> 00:31:49,864
[laughter]

683
00:31:49,995 --> 00:31:52,432
 Sad, sad, sad.

684
00:31:52,562 --> 00:31:53,302
 Freaks.

685
00:31:56,958 --> 00:31:59,265
[baby crying]

686
00:32:14,193 --> 00:32:16,499
[mumbling]

687
00:32:23,115 --> 00:32:25,421
[baby crying]

688
00:32:31,036 --> 00:32:33,908
[whinnying]

689
00:32:36,041 --> 00:32:37,346
[baby laughing]

690
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:40,871
 Nice melons.

691
00:32:41,002 --> 00:32:42,090
 Thank you.

692
00:32:42,221 --> 00:32:42,961
 Thanks.

693
00:32:45,702 --> 00:32:48,314
- You.
- Please pick me.

694
00:32:48,444 --> 00:32:49,228
 You.

695
00:32:49,358 --> 00:32:50,664
 You.

696
00:32:50,794 --> 00:32:51,839
 You.

697
00:32:51,970 --> 00:32:52,753
 Please pick me.

698
00:32:52,883 --> 00:32:53,623
 You.

699
00:32:56,104 --> 00:32:56,887
 You.

700
00:33:00,108 --> 00:33:00,891
 You.

701
00:33:04,025 --> 00:33:05,331
[whistle]

702
00:33:17,430 --> 00:33:18,344
[beep]

703
00:33:18,474 --> 00:33:20,824
[rock music]

704
00:33:28,484 --> 00:33:29,268
 Ah!

705
00:33:33,881 --> 00:33:36,231
[beeping]

706
00:33:37,450 --> 00:33:38,233
 Woo!

707
00:33:41,367 --> 00:33:43,195
[clattering]

708
00:33:44,848 --> 00:33:45,719
[clattering]

709
00:33:45,849 --> 00:33:48,287
 Oh!

710
00:33:48,417 --> 00:33:49,157
Ah!

711
00:33:52,334 --> 00:33:54,771
Ah!

712
00:33:54,902 --> 00:33:55,685
Whoa!

713
00:34:05,260 --> 00:34:06,087
[water rushing]

714
00:34:07,349 --> 00:34:08,089
 Ah--

715
00:34:12,267 --> 00:34:14,574
[air blowing]

716
00:34:15,836 --> 00:34:16,576
 Yeah.

717
00:34:20,710 --> 00:34:25,150
Ah-- Uh--

718
00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:26,064
Hm.

719
00:34:32,635 --> 00:34:35,725
Oh, yeah.

720
00:34:35,856 --> 00:34:36,639
 Hi.

721
00:34:36,770 --> 00:34:37,901
 How you doing?

722
00:34:38,032 --> 00:34:38,772
 Good.

723
00:34:41,122 --> 00:34:42,080
 Where's your sister?

724
00:34:42,210 --> 00:34:44,038
 I don't know.

725
00:34:44,169 --> 00:34:47,389
Her cool friends
are very sensitive.

726
00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:49,348
 She have a lot of friends?

727
00:34:49,478 --> 00:34:51,306
 Compared to me,
or to normal people?

728
00:34:54,788 --> 00:34:56,746
 Tess said she'd rather die
than be collected by a man who

729
00:34:56,877 --> 00:34:59,836
looks like a penguin.

730
00:34:59,967 --> 00:35:02,056
 I only take random insults
from immediate friends

731
00:35:02,187 --> 00:35:03,101
and family.

732
00:35:03,231 --> 00:35:04,406
 I'm Tess' best friend.

733
00:35:04,537 --> 00:35:06,104
 Good enough.

734
00:35:06,234 --> 00:35:07,714
Where is she?

735
00:35:07,844 --> 00:35:10,282
 Waiting for you to leave,
or for cover of nightfall.

736
00:35:10,412 --> 00:35:13,111
 Thank you.

737
00:35:13,241 --> 00:35:15,722
Miss Tess?

738
00:35:15,852 --> 00:35:17,550
Tess Jamieson?

739
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:20,988
Your butler is
here, and waiting.

740
00:35:21,119 --> 00:35:25,210
Hurry up, or I'll throw out
your favorite Barney video,

741
00:35:25,340 --> 00:35:27,821
and your stash of letters
to one J. Timberlake.

742
00:35:34,523 --> 00:35:36,177
So, how did basketball go?

743
00:35:36,308 --> 00:35:37,787
 I stunk.

744
00:35:37,918 --> 00:35:39,615
What did you expect?

745
00:35:39,746 --> 00:35:40,616
 I don't know.

746
00:35:40,747 --> 00:35:42,009
What did you expect?

747
00:35:42,140 --> 00:35:44,011
 Well, I thought I'd be lousy.

748
00:35:44,142 --> 00:35:46,579
 Well, then, it all worked
out the way you thought.

749
00:35:46,709 --> 00:35:49,190
Miss Tess, how was your day?

750
00:35:49,321 --> 00:35:50,626
 Do you gamble?

751
00:35:50,757 --> 00:35:51,845
 What do you got in mind?

752
00:35:51,975 --> 00:35:54,152
 I bet you'll be
fired within a week.

753
00:35:54,282 --> 00:35:55,153
 What odds are you offering?

754
00:35:58,025 --> 00:36:00,288
Doesn't anyone want to sit up
front with the luau dinner?

755
00:36:04,945 --> 00:36:17,958
[humming] Dinner is served.

756
00:36:24,225 --> 00:36:25,966
TESS: This is so perfect.

757
00:36:26,096 --> 00:36:27,402
 You think she'll like it?

758
00:36:27,533 --> 00:36:29,839
 She'll be breathless.

759
00:36:29,970 --> 00:36:32,146
It's a napkin, moron.

760
00:36:32,277 --> 00:36:33,278
 Why the hurry?

761
00:36:33,408 --> 00:36:34,975
 He made us all dinner.

762
00:36:35,105 --> 00:36:39,066
The least that we can do is
show him a little gratitude.

763
00:36:39,197 --> 00:36:44,593
Ah-- oh my good god.

764
00:36:44,724 --> 00:36:46,726
A luau?

765
00:36:46,856 --> 00:36:47,640
Mm.

766
00:36:54,037 --> 00:36:55,082
Whose idea was this?

767
00:36:55,213 --> 00:36:55,952
 The butler.

768
00:37:06,746 --> 00:37:08,617
[groaning]

769
00:37:12,752 --> 00:37:14,623
 One Mississippi, two
Mississippi, three Mississippi,

770
00:37:14,754 --> 00:37:16,625
five Mississippi, six
Mississippi, seven Mississippi,

771
00:37:16,756 --> 00:37:17,974
nine Mississippi, 10 Mississ--

772
00:37:23,458 --> 00:37:25,243
[groaning]

773
00:37:26,722 --> 00:37:27,549
 Rich.

774
00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:30,030
Full bodied.

775
00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:33,076
Hm-- I smell a hint of mushroom?

776
00:37:33,207 --> 00:37:34,252
 Shitake?

777
00:37:34,382 --> 00:37:35,296
 Portobello.

778
00:37:35,427 --> 00:37:37,690
Burgundy region.

779
00:37:37,820 --> 00:37:39,518
I will take you there one day.

780
00:37:39,648 --> 00:37:41,563
 Can I come to "Rodungi?"

781
00:37:41,694 --> 00:37:43,652
 Oh, Bates, sweet--

782
00:37:43,783 --> 00:37:45,480
but it's not for les enfantes.

783
00:37:45,611 --> 00:37:49,658
I think it will be a trip
just for your mother and me.

784
00:37:49,789 --> 00:37:51,704
 Jacques is joking.

785
00:37:51,834 --> 00:37:53,619
Of course we can
all go together.

786
00:37:53,749 --> 00:37:55,273
The children would love it.

787
00:37:55,403 --> 00:37:56,970
 Ah, the children?

788
00:37:57,100 --> 00:37:58,014
Of course.

789
00:37:58,145 --> 00:37:59,407
 Can we go, Mom?

790
00:37:59,538 --> 00:38:01,801
Just the three of us?

791
00:38:01,931 --> 00:38:03,411
 Madam.

792
00:38:03,542 --> 00:38:10,679
Lua-- ah-- the custom
is to prepare the food

793
00:38:10,810 --> 00:38:16,555
in an emu, or underground oven.

794
00:38:16,685 --> 00:38:18,208
 Sounds-- wonderful.

795
00:38:18,339 --> 00:38:21,386
Doesn't it, children?

796
00:38:21,516 --> 00:38:22,256
[gasping]

797
00:38:22,387 --> 00:38:23,170
 Gross.

798
00:38:26,216 --> 00:38:33,311
 It is normally served with
a mashed taro root, or poi.

799
00:38:33,441 --> 00:38:34,747
[farting sound]

800
00:38:34,877 --> 00:38:36,226
 Gah!

801
00:38:36,357 --> 00:38:39,142
[farting sound]

802
00:38:39,273 --> 00:38:40,143
 Plug it!

803
00:38:40,274 --> 00:38:42,145
Plug it up!

804
00:38:42,276 --> 00:38:43,625
Ah!

805
00:38:43,756 --> 00:38:45,148
Whoa!

806
00:38:45,279 --> 00:38:46,149
Ah!

807
00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:47,063
 Hot piggy.

808
00:38:47,194 --> 00:38:48,151
Hot piggy.

809
00:38:48,282 --> 00:38:49,152
 Oh, lord!

810
00:38:49,283 --> 00:38:50,110
 Stay with me!

811
00:38:50,240 --> 00:38:51,633
Stay with me!

812
00:38:51,764 --> 00:38:53,592
[screaming]

813
00:38:55,768 --> 00:38:58,118
[screaming]

814
00:38:59,815 --> 00:39:01,339
 I cannot organize the world.
I cannot the world.

815
00:39:01,469 --> 00:39:03,123
I cannot--
[bang]

816
00:39:07,127 --> 00:39:09,695
 I think you'll find that
I've just won the bet.

817
00:39:19,922 --> 00:39:21,315
 Oh, I'm so sorry.

818
00:39:21,446 --> 00:39:24,536
Here, let me help you.

819
00:39:24,666 --> 00:39:26,146
 Imbecile!

820
00:39:26,276 --> 00:39:28,148
But no, you do not
want to [inaudible].

821
00:39:31,673 --> 00:39:34,110
 I just wanted to
make a nice dinner.

822
00:39:34,241 --> 00:39:36,069
Sort of a thank you.

823
00:39:36,199 --> 00:39:37,723
 Well, maybe if I talk to Mom?

824
00:39:37,853 --> 00:39:38,854
Would that help?

825
00:39:38,985 --> 00:39:39,812
 Naw.

826
00:39:39,942 --> 00:39:41,379
I'm a screw up.

827
00:39:41,509 --> 00:39:42,945
I've done this before.

828
00:39:43,076 --> 00:39:45,339
 You blew up another pig?

829
00:39:45,470 --> 00:39:48,342
 Bedtime, Bates.

830
00:39:48,473 --> 00:39:49,561
 Good luck.

831
00:39:49,691 --> 00:39:51,214
 Can you give me
one good reason why

832
00:39:51,345 --> 00:39:53,260
I shouldn't fire you right now?

833
00:39:53,391 --> 00:39:54,130
 Yes.

834
00:39:54,261 --> 00:39:55,305
 OK.

835
00:39:55,436 --> 00:39:58,265
I'm listening.

836
00:39:58,396 --> 00:40:00,180
 Can I have till
tomorrow morning?

837
00:40:00,310 --> 00:40:03,401
 This is a complete
disaster area.

838
00:40:03,531 --> 00:40:08,231
My pristine dining room is
covered in pig shrapnel!

839
00:40:08,362 --> 00:40:09,319
 I'll clean it up.

840
00:40:09,450 --> 00:40:10,364
 You'd better.

841
00:40:10,495 --> 00:40:14,934
 Every-- shred.

842
00:40:15,064 --> 00:40:15,891
 Oh.

843
00:40:16,022 --> 00:40:17,719
And Bob?

844
00:40:17,850 --> 00:40:23,508
I think it's best if you never,
ever, ever cook anything again.

845
00:40:23,638 --> 00:40:24,378
 Yes, ma'am.

846
00:40:27,990 --> 00:40:29,339
[knocking]

847
00:40:33,996 --> 00:40:34,954
Thought you should know--

848
00:40:35,084 --> 00:40:35,911
 Closed door.

849
00:40:36,042 --> 00:40:37,217
Big hint.

850
00:40:37,347 --> 00:40:38,914
 I'm staying.

851
00:40:39,045 --> 00:40:40,655
 I thought service were meant
to be seen, and not heard?

852
00:40:46,052 --> 00:40:47,227
 Hey, these are great.

853
00:40:47,357 --> 00:40:48,446
 Hey!

854
00:40:48,576 --> 00:40:49,359
Give me that.

855
00:40:49,490 --> 00:40:50,709
It's private.

856
00:40:50,839 --> 00:40:52,319
 Don't get your
knickers in a knot.

857
00:40:59,892 --> 00:41:00,719
Watch.
Watch.

858
00:41:00,849 --> 00:41:01,676
Watch.

859
00:41:01,807 --> 00:41:02,677
Watch.

860
00:41:02,808 --> 00:41:03,504
Watch.

861
00:41:06,376 --> 00:41:07,116
 OK.

862
00:41:11,294 --> 00:41:13,166
SINGER: Take your time today.

863
00:41:13,296 --> 00:41:19,085
There's no hurry,
you can wait a while.

864
00:41:19,215 --> 00:41:23,045
If only for a smile.

865
00:41:23,176 --> 00:41:24,046
 I'll get this!

866
00:41:24,177 --> 00:41:25,047
Whoa!

867
00:41:25,178 --> 00:41:26,571
 Oh--

868
00:41:26,701 --> 00:41:27,572
 All right!

869
00:41:27,702 --> 00:41:28,442
 There you go.

870
00:41:28,573 --> 00:41:31,010
Oh!

871
00:41:31,140 --> 00:41:32,011
Geez.

872
00:41:32,141 --> 00:41:33,012
Ah!

873
00:41:33,142 --> 00:41:33,926
 Sorry.

874
00:41:44,632 --> 00:41:45,503
 Hm?

875
00:41:45,633 --> 00:41:47,505
Ah-ha.

876
00:41:47,635 --> 00:41:50,464
Ah-ha.

877
00:41:50,595 --> 00:41:51,465
 I'm watching.

878
00:41:56,601 --> 00:41:57,906
[phone ringing]

879
00:41:58,037 --> 00:41:59,429
 Hello?

880
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:00,953
Hi, Mom.

881
00:42:01,083 --> 00:42:03,042
I'm in a tree.

882
00:42:03,172 --> 00:42:04,391
[laughter]

883
00:42:04,522 --> 00:42:06,306
 Miss Tess.

884
00:42:06,436 --> 00:42:08,221
There you go.

885
00:42:08,351 --> 00:42:09,701
Bates, there you are.

886
00:42:09,831 --> 00:42:11,180
 Bates!

887
00:42:11,311 --> 00:42:12,138
 Nice hat.

888
00:42:20,102 --> 00:42:21,408
Five in a row.

889
00:42:32,114 --> 00:42:33,942
[humming]

890
00:42:35,596 --> 00:42:37,337
 Wanna shoot some
balls with me?

891
00:42:37,467 --> 00:42:38,338
 Sure.

892
00:42:38,468 --> 00:42:40,296
[squeaking]

893
00:42:42,385 --> 00:42:43,430
 What's that?

894
00:42:43,561 --> 00:42:45,127
 What?

895
00:42:45,258 --> 00:42:48,957
 Have you got a
remote controlled ball?

896
00:42:49,088 --> 00:42:49,871
 Rascal?

897
00:42:50,002 --> 00:42:51,481
Who's Rascal?

898
00:42:51,612 --> 00:42:52,874
 Rascal!

899
00:42:53,005 --> 00:42:53,788
Rascal!

900
00:42:57,313 --> 00:42:59,098
[squeaking]

901
00:43:00,186 --> 00:43:01,187
 Rascal!

902
00:43:01,317 --> 00:43:02,318
Rascal!

903
00:43:02,449 --> 00:43:04,233
[squeaking]

904
00:43:05,887 --> 00:43:06,584
 Rascal!

905
00:43:09,195 --> 00:43:09,978
BATES: Bob!

906
00:43:13,503 --> 00:43:14,635
Rascal!

907
00:43:14,766 --> 00:43:17,029
 Rascal!

908
00:43:17,159 --> 00:43:18,944
Bob!

909
00:43:19,074 --> 00:43:20,902
Bob!

910
00:43:21,033 --> 00:43:22,382
Rascal!

911
00:43:22,512 --> 00:43:23,296
Rascal!

912
00:43:34,263 --> 00:43:36,570
 Poor thing.

913
00:43:36,701 --> 00:43:38,311
Someone's been a
very naughty butler.

914
00:43:46,101 --> 00:43:48,626
[heavy breathing]

915
00:43:48,756 --> 00:43:49,670
 Rascal.

916
00:43:49,801 --> 00:43:51,498
Rascal.

917
00:43:51,629 --> 00:43:53,892
He licked the jar right
out of Newton's hand,

918
00:43:54,022 --> 00:43:57,069
sliming his palm with
a streak of black gob.

919
00:43:57,199 --> 00:43:58,897
Perhaps the most
disgusting thing

920
00:43:59,027 --> 00:44:01,116
Newton had experienced
since the time

921
00:44:01,247 --> 00:44:03,336
he mistakenly ate a maggot.

922
00:44:03,466 --> 00:44:04,554
 Hi, guys.

923
00:44:04,685 --> 00:44:06,295
How was your day?

924
00:44:06,426 --> 00:44:09,690
Anything interesting happen?

925
00:44:09,821 --> 00:44:10,691
 The usual.

926
00:44:10,822 --> 00:44:11,605
 Ah.

927
00:44:16,479 --> 00:44:19,265
 Why aren't you our dad?

928
00:44:19,395 --> 00:44:22,790
 Just didn't happen yet.

929
00:44:22,921 --> 00:44:25,706
[off-key music]

930
00:44:35,673 --> 00:44:36,586
 Bob?

931
00:44:36,717 --> 00:44:37,500
Bob?

932
00:44:42,549 --> 00:44:43,332
 Too loud?

933
00:44:43,463 --> 00:44:44,594
 Uh, no.

934
00:44:44,725 --> 00:44:47,989
No, just, uh--
just, it's really--

935
00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:50,426
really horrible.

936
00:44:50,557 --> 00:44:51,819
 I love the trumpet.

937
00:44:51,950 --> 00:44:53,168
Then you should practice.

938
00:44:53,299 --> 00:44:55,214
 Yeah.

939
00:44:55,344 --> 00:45:02,177
 Um-- Bob, you must think
I'm a really horrible mother.

940
00:45:02,308 --> 00:45:03,396
 No.

941
00:45:03,526 --> 00:45:05,528
 Well, it wasn't
an easy decision.

942
00:45:05,659 --> 00:45:07,226
 Sure.

943
00:45:07,356 --> 00:45:10,142
 It's not like time was
exactly on my side, so I--

944
00:45:10,272 --> 00:45:11,012
thought I'd do it on--

945
00:45:11,143 --> 00:45:12,927
 Hey.

946
00:45:13,058 --> 00:45:14,059
You're-- you're blessed.

947
00:45:17,671 --> 00:45:18,454
Sorry.

948
00:45:18,585 --> 00:45:21,893
I, uh-- spoke out of turn.

949
00:45:22,023 --> 00:45:23,242
Zip.

950
00:45:23,372 --> 00:45:25,026
 That's all right.

951
00:45:25,157 --> 00:45:26,419
Thank you.

952
00:45:26,549 --> 00:45:28,726
 Can I ask you a question?

953
00:45:28,856 --> 00:45:30,118
 Yeah.

954
00:45:30,249 --> 00:45:32,730
 What's capital management?

955
00:45:32,860 --> 00:45:36,255
[laughter]

956
00:45:36,385 --> 00:45:37,169
 Bye!

957
00:45:37,299 --> 00:45:38,605
Thanks for the lift!

958
00:45:38,736 --> 00:45:41,042
 See you later.

959
00:45:41,173 --> 00:45:42,478
 Bye bye.

960
00:45:42,609 --> 00:45:45,394
[phone ringing]

961
00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:50,660
 Hello, Judith.

962
00:45:50,791 --> 00:45:52,706
I'll be about an hour, or so.

963
00:45:52,837 --> 00:45:54,229
It can wait.

964
00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:55,622
Yeah.

965
00:45:55,753 --> 00:45:56,666
I'll be on my cell
phone if you need me.

966
00:45:56,797 --> 00:45:57,580
OK.

967
00:45:57,711 --> 00:45:59,931
Bye.

968
00:46:00,061 --> 00:46:00,801
Oh!

969
00:46:00,932 --> 00:46:03,021
[car alarm]

970
00:46:04,544 --> 00:46:05,893
 Oh!

971
00:46:06,024 --> 00:46:09,288
Oh-- Well, I can't come
to a meeting with stains

972
00:46:09,418 --> 00:46:11,681
on my blouse, now, can I?

973
00:46:11,812 --> 00:46:12,944
I'm back, Bob.

974
00:46:13,074 --> 00:46:14,772
I'm just going to
take a quick bath.

975
00:46:14,902 --> 00:46:16,991
I'll be there as soon as I can.

976
00:46:17,122 --> 00:46:18,819
[humming]

977
00:46:27,175 --> 00:46:29,482
[SINGING] I'll be over at 10,
they tell me time and again.

978
00:46:29,612 --> 00:46:30,788
I can't wait.

979
00:46:34,748 --> 00:46:37,055
[air blowing]

980
00:46:44,149 --> 00:46:47,935
 Why do you build me up,
buttercup, baby, just to--

981
00:46:48,066 --> 00:46:50,372
[screaming]

982
00:46:54,986 --> 00:46:56,204
 Can I get you
some towels, ma'am?

983
00:46:56,335 --> 00:46:57,118
 Uh-huh!

984
00:47:13,091 --> 00:47:14,222
 Don't get that
flipping burgers.

985
00:47:18,966 --> 00:47:23,275
 And then I deep right,
cut left, and slam dunked.

986
00:47:23,405 --> 00:47:27,583
 Who traded in my geek brother
for a jock geek brother?

987
00:47:27,714 --> 00:47:28,846
 Hey.

988
00:47:28,976 --> 00:47:30,282
Where are you all
going on a Sunday?

989
00:47:30,412 --> 00:47:32,458
- Basketball tryouts.
- Well, I'll drive you.

990
00:47:32,588 --> 00:47:33,807
Let me get my purse.

991
00:47:33,938 --> 00:47:36,897
 I wanna go with Bob.

992
00:47:37,028 --> 00:47:37,855
 OK.

993
00:47:37,985 --> 00:47:39,857
Uh-- what about you, Tess?

994
00:47:39,987 --> 00:47:41,859
 I arranged to meet Sophie.

995
00:47:41,989 --> 00:47:44,252
Don't you have work to do?

996
00:47:44,383 --> 00:47:45,210
 Nope.

997
00:47:45,340 --> 00:47:47,473
Amazingly.

998
00:47:47,603 --> 00:47:48,735
All right, well--

999
00:47:48,866 --> 00:47:50,955
I'll see you later.

1000
00:47:51,085 --> 00:47:53,435
[phone ringing]

1001
00:47:55,394 --> 00:47:56,177
 Oui?

1002
00:47:56,308 --> 00:47:57,483
Hello?

1003
00:47:57,613 --> 00:47:58,788
Anne?

1004
00:47:58,919 --> 00:48:00,268
What's wrong?

1005
00:48:00,399 --> 00:48:03,097
 I've got the whole day
free, and I'm lonely!

1006
00:48:08,102 --> 00:48:11,192
Ah-- it's so nice to
do something for myself

1007
00:48:11,323 --> 00:48:12,933
for a change.

1008
00:48:13,064 --> 00:48:15,675
 We'll go out and find
a nice, quiet place.

1009
00:48:15,805 --> 00:48:18,330
 Oh, this is lovely.

1010
00:48:18,460 --> 00:48:20,767
This is nice.

1011
00:48:20,898 --> 00:48:23,465
Now, this is relaxing.

1012
00:48:23,596 --> 00:48:27,687
This-- Take me home.

1013
00:48:27,817 --> 00:48:30,037
 What?

1014
00:48:30,168 --> 00:48:31,647
 I-- I can't be
here without them.

1015
00:48:31,778 --> 00:48:34,955
I-- I just can't enjoy
myself without the kids.

1016
00:48:35,086 --> 00:48:37,305
I mean, you know, I just can't.
- Let's go.

1017
00:48:37,436 --> 00:48:39,133
 OK, Jacques, I have children.

1018
00:48:39,264 --> 00:48:40,352
I love them.

1019
00:48:40,482 --> 00:48:41,614
They're not just
going to disappear.

1020
00:48:41,744 --> 00:48:43,311
You would prefer
that I disappear?

1021
00:48:43,442 --> 00:48:45,009
Examine the situation.

1022
00:48:45,139 --> 00:48:48,142
One, you are a single woman.

1023
00:48:48,273 --> 00:48:53,843
Very beautiful, true,
but very, very anal.

1024
00:48:53,974 --> 00:48:54,714
 Anal.

1025
00:48:54,844 --> 00:48:56,455
I'm anal.

1026
00:48:56,585 --> 00:49:01,895
 Two-- your children,
they are not beautiful.

1027
00:49:02,026 --> 00:49:04,767
Just annoying.

1028
00:49:04,898 --> 00:49:05,986
Three-- if I go--

1029
00:49:06,117 --> 00:49:07,292
 I'll take three.

1030
00:49:07,422 --> 00:49:08,162
You go.

1031
00:49:08,293 --> 00:49:09,294
Now.

1032
00:49:09,424 --> 00:49:11,383
Take a cab.

1033
00:49:11,513 --> 00:49:15,126
 Anne, you are a single
woman of a certain age.

1034
00:49:15,256 --> 00:49:17,824
You will not find another man.

1035
00:49:17,955 --> 00:49:22,742
Statistically, you have a better
chance of being hit by a truck.

1036
00:49:22,872 --> 00:49:24,004
One driven by Bob.

1037
00:49:33,405 --> 00:49:34,449
 So?

1038
00:49:34,580 --> 00:49:35,973
 So, what?

1039
00:49:36,103 --> 00:49:37,017
 How'd it go?

1040
00:49:37,148 --> 00:49:38,671
The tryouts.

1041
00:49:38,801 --> 00:49:41,021
 There was no tryouts.

1042
00:49:41,152 --> 00:49:44,851
The coach had already
decided who was on the team.

1043
00:49:44,982 --> 00:49:45,721
 What?

1044
00:49:45,852 --> 00:49:49,029
That's not fair.

1045
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:50,813
Wait here.

1046
00:49:50,944 --> 00:49:53,381
 You're not going
to embarrass me?

1047
00:49:53,512 --> 00:49:56,341
 You bet I am.

1048
00:49:56,471 --> 00:49:57,733
Hey!

1049
00:49:57,864 --> 00:49:59,431
You the coach?

1050
00:49:59,561 --> 00:50:00,910
 Who's asking?

1051
00:50:01,041 --> 00:50:01,781
 The name's Tree.

1052
00:50:05,654 --> 00:50:07,439
 Bob?

1053
00:50:07,569 --> 00:50:10,355
Bob the mascot?

1054
00:50:10,485 --> 00:50:11,356
 Jerry?

1055
00:50:11,486 --> 00:50:12,835
 Yeah!

1056
00:50:12,966 --> 00:50:15,142
[laughter]

1057
00:50:17,188 --> 00:50:18,406
 Yeah.

1058
00:50:18,537 --> 00:50:20,539
What happened to the
Bismarck Barbarians?

1059
00:50:20,669 --> 00:50:23,629
 Ah-- I left not long
after the owner fired you.

1060
00:50:23,759 --> 00:50:24,543
He was a real a-hole.

1061
00:50:24,673 --> 00:50:25,457
 I know.

1062
00:50:25,587 --> 00:50:27,676
I know.

1063
00:50:27,807 --> 00:50:29,156
 I've still got
your helmet, though.

1064
00:50:29,287 --> 00:50:30,592
You want to see it?

1065
00:50:30,723 --> 00:50:33,160
You bet.

1066
00:50:33,291 --> 00:50:34,640
It's about Bates.

1067
00:50:34,770 --> 00:50:35,815
Bates Jamieson.

1068
00:50:35,945 --> 00:50:36,685
 Pull up a chair.

1069
00:50:43,083 --> 00:50:45,085
Put it on.

1070
00:50:45,216 --> 00:50:48,001
 OK.

1071
00:50:48,132 --> 00:50:49,481
Yeah.

1072
00:50:49,611 --> 00:50:51,178
Still fits like a glove.

1073
00:50:51,309 --> 00:50:54,747
A really-- weird glove.

1074
00:50:54,877 --> 00:50:57,358
 It took them two hours to
remove that from his buttocks.

1075
00:50:57,489 --> 00:51:00,187
 Yeah, I probably shouldn't
have left it on his chair.

1076
00:51:00,318 --> 00:51:03,277
 So, what about
the Jamieson kid?

1077
00:51:03,408 --> 00:51:06,150
 He wants to try
out for the team.

1078
00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:07,107
 He's kinda small.

1079
00:51:11,155 --> 00:51:13,418
Why is it impossible
to say no to you?

1080
00:51:13,548 --> 00:51:14,462
[laughter]

1081
00:51:14,593 --> 00:51:15,420
 All right.

1082
00:51:15,550 --> 00:51:16,334
 Yeah!

1083
00:51:19,424 --> 00:51:20,599
All right.

1084
00:51:20,729 --> 00:51:21,904
[whistle]

1085
00:51:22,035 --> 00:51:22,818
 Go ahead.

1086
00:51:28,476 --> 00:51:31,436
BOB: Come on, Bates.

1087
00:51:31,566 --> 00:51:33,829
He's a little nervous.

1088
00:51:33,960 --> 00:51:35,266
Put one in the net there, Bates!

1089
00:51:35,396 --> 00:51:36,441
Put one in the net, there.

1090
00:51:48,975 --> 00:51:50,585
How you doing?

1091
00:51:50,716 --> 00:51:52,631
 The coach hates me.

1092
00:51:52,761 --> 00:51:54,154
 Forget about him, OK?

1093
00:51:54,285 --> 00:51:55,590
It's just you and me.

1094
00:51:55,721 --> 00:51:57,375
Just like at home.

1095
00:51:57,505 --> 00:51:59,116
Come on.

1096
00:51:59,246 --> 00:52:00,508
Come on, let's go.

1097
00:52:00,639 --> 00:52:01,509
Come on!

1098
00:52:01,640 --> 00:52:03,120
Like we practiced.

1099
00:52:03,250 --> 00:52:04,469
Come on.

1100
00:52:04,599 --> 00:52:05,948
 Hey!
You're too--

1101
00:52:06,079 --> 00:52:07,211
 Oh, you got.
You got it.

1102
00:52:07,341 --> 00:52:08,473
Take it around me.
Take it around me.

1103
00:52:08,603 --> 00:52:09,735
Take it around me.
Take it around me.

1104
00:52:09,865 --> 00:52:10,518
Take it around me.
Take it around me.

1105
00:52:10,649 --> 00:52:11,606
Take it around me.

1106
00:52:11,737 --> 00:52:12,390
Take it around me.
Put it in.

1107
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:12,912
Put it in the net.

1108
00:52:13,042 --> 00:52:13,608
Come on.

1109
00:52:13,739 --> 00:52:14,435
No fancy stuff.

1110
00:52:14,566 --> 00:52:17,525
Put it in the net.

1111
00:52:17,656 --> 00:52:18,483
 Yeah!

1112
00:52:18,613 --> 00:52:19,353
 All right!

1113
00:52:19,484 --> 00:52:21,094
 I got one!

1114
00:52:21,225 --> 00:52:22,226
 Two points.

1115
00:52:22,356 --> 00:52:23,140
Two points.

1116
00:52:26,926 --> 00:52:29,798
Hey, Tess.

1117
00:52:29,929 --> 00:52:32,497
Been shopping?

1118
00:52:32,627 --> 00:52:35,413
What is that, a wristband?

1119
00:52:35,543 --> 00:52:36,718
Pair of socks?

1120
00:52:36,849 --> 00:52:37,676
 Mom!

1121
00:52:37,806 --> 00:52:38,677
 Is it a bib?

1122
00:52:38,807 --> 00:52:39,634
 Hey.

1123
00:52:39,765 --> 00:52:40,679
How were the tryouts?

1124
00:52:40,809 --> 00:52:41,549
 Great!

1125
00:52:41,680 --> 00:52:42,855
 Good.

1126
00:52:42,985 --> 00:52:44,378
I've made salmon skewers.
- Salmon?

1127
00:52:44,509 --> 00:52:45,423
 I'll tell Tess.

1128
00:52:45,553 --> 00:52:46,293
 What?

1129
00:52:49,296 --> 00:52:50,167
BOB: Hey, Tess?

1130
00:52:50,297 --> 00:52:51,516
 Don't come in.

1131
00:52:51,646 --> 00:52:53,257
 Your mother made a barbecue.

1132
00:52:53,387 --> 00:52:54,127
 I'll be down in five.

1133
00:53:02,222 --> 00:53:03,354
[humming]

1134
00:53:06,270 --> 00:53:09,447
 Would you like
to join us, Bob?

1135
00:53:09,577 --> 00:53:12,189
Please.

1136
00:53:12,319 --> 00:53:14,669
We'd like you to.

1137
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:17,106
Thank you.

1138
00:53:17,237 --> 00:53:19,674
Real nice of you to have made
these salmon skewers, isn't it,

1139
00:53:19,805 --> 00:53:21,763
kids?

1140
00:53:21,894 --> 00:53:22,764
And a green salad.

1141
00:53:22,895 --> 00:53:23,635
 Yeah.

1142
00:53:26,464 --> 00:53:27,552
 That was delicious.

1143
00:53:27,682 --> 00:53:29,249
 Well, I should
have made hot dogs.

1144
00:53:29,380 --> 00:53:30,163
 No, no.

1145
00:53:30,294 --> 00:53:31,512
It was really good.

1146
00:53:31,643 --> 00:53:32,426
 Oh.

1147
00:53:32,557 --> 00:53:33,384
You missed a spot.

1148
00:53:33,514 --> 00:53:34,298
 Where?

1149
00:53:34,428 --> 00:53:37,431
 Right there.

1150
00:53:37,562 --> 00:53:41,696
 You know, Tess has drawn
some amazing dress designs.

1151
00:53:41,827 --> 00:53:43,394
You should see her schoolbooks.

1152
00:53:43,524 --> 00:53:44,612
 Schoolbooks?

1153
00:53:44,743 --> 00:53:46,919
 Yeah, she draws
in her schoolbooks.

1154
00:53:47,049 --> 00:53:49,138
TESS: You're such a liar!

1155
00:53:49,269 --> 00:53:52,141
You're such a stupid liar!
- Tess!

1156
00:53:52,272 --> 00:53:53,012
 It's not true!

1157
00:53:53,142 --> 00:53:55,362
I hate you, Bob!

1158
00:53:55,493 --> 00:53:56,320
Tess!

1159
00:53:56,450 --> 00:53:59,236
Tess?

1160
00:53:59,366 --> 00:54:02,674
 I guess that's what it's
like having family, Rascal.

1161
00:54:02,804 --> 00:54:04,415
Ups and downs.

1162
00:54:04,545 --> 00:54:07,113
[knocking] Just a second.

1163
00:54:13,250 --> 00:54:15,469
Come in.

1164
00:54:15,600 --> 00:54:17,341
 Hi.

1165
00:54:17,471 --> 00:54:18,690
I've spoken to Tess.

1166
00:54:18,820 --> 00:54:20,605
And she's shown
me your drawings.

1167
00:54:20,735 --> 00:54:21,519
You're right.

1168
00:54:21,649 --> 00:54:22,998
They're amazing.

1169
00:54:23,129 --> 00:54:24,391
So, thank you for that.

1170
00:54:28,743 --> 00:54:31,964
 Is something wrong?

1171
00:54:32,094 --> 00:54:35,359
 Don't take this
the wrong way, Bob.

1172
00:54:35,489 --> 00:54:37,491
You're the butler.

1173
00:54:37,622 --> 00:54:38,971
You're not her father.

1174
00:54:43,062 --> 00:54:44,846
 I understand completely.

1175
00:54:48,023 --> 00:54:48,763
 Thanks.

1176
00:54:51,853 --> 00:54:53,202
Goodnight, then.

1177
00:54:53,333 --> 00:54:54,203
 Goodnight.

1178
00:55:03,648 --> 00:55:05,563
 Why are we eating in here?

1179
00:55:05,693 --> 00:55:06,738
 More coffee, ma'am?

1180
00:55:06,868 --> 00:55:08,130
- Oh, I'll get it.
- Please, ma'am.

1181
00:55:08,261 --> 00:55:09,044
Leave it to me.

1182
00:55:15,573 --> 00:55:16,313
 It's cool.

1183
00:55:20,142 --> 00:55:20,882
 A new skirt?

1184
00:55:21,013 --> 00:55:21,796
 Yeah.

1185
00:55:21,927 --> 00:55:22,710
Like it.

1186
00:55:22,841 --> 00:55:23,711
 No.

1187
00:55:23,842 --> 00:55:24,930
It's like theirs.

1188
00:55:25,060 --> 00:55:28,281
 That's the point, stupid.

1189
00:55:28,412 --> 00:55:30,805
 So, you coming to watch
me get my nose pierced?

1190
00:55:30,936 --> 00:55:33,242
 Not on this planet.

1191
00:55:33,373 --> 00:55:35,680
 Tomorrow after school, OK?

1192
00:55:35,810 --> 00:55:37,595
[bell ringing]

1193
00:55:37,725 --> 00:55:40,467
 Bye.

1194
00:55:40,598 --> 00:55:43,252
 You're hanging with
the clone Barbies now?

1195
00:55:43,383 --> 00:55:45,951
 Maybe when I'm in tighter
I'll put in a good word for you,

1196
00:55:46,081 --> 00:55:47,953
and you can hang with?

1197
00:55:48,083 --> 00:55:50,956
 I liked you because I
thought you were an individual.

1198
00:55:51,086 --> 00:55:53,350
Like me.

1199
00:55:53,480 --> 00:55:54,655
Now you're just
more like pathetic.

1200
00:56:08,452 --> 00:56:10,279
Stop!

1201
00:56:10,410 --> 00:56:13,239
Excuse me.

1202
00:56:13,370 --> 00:56:15,154
 Kate, is the fruit washed?

1203
00:56:15,284 --> 00:56:17,374
Judith, did you wash the fruit?

1204
00:56:17,504 --> 00:56:18,375
 It's pre-washed.

1205
00:56:18,505 --> 00:56:20,028
 Pre-washed?
Pre-washed?

1206
00:56:20,159 --> 00:56:20,986
 Pre-washed.

1207
00:56:26,383 --> 00:56:27,732
 I do not want to lose
this deal because one

1208
00:56:27,862 --> 00:56:30,038
of my investors has the runs.

1209
00:56:30,169 --> 00:56:30,952
 The runs?

1210
00:56:35,000 --> 00:56:37,394
 Done.

1211
00:56:37,524 --> 00:56:38,960
Done.

1212
00:56:39,091 --> 00:56:39,874
Done.

1213
00:56:44,488 --> 00:56:45,358
[squeak]

1214
00:56:45,489 --> 00:56:47,839
[screaming]

1215
00:56:55,455 --> 00:56:57,326
 Rodent!

1216
00:56:57,457 --> 00:56:58,327
Rodent!

1217
00:56:58,458 --> 00:56:59,851
Huge rodent!

1218
00:56:59,981 --> 00:57:01,461
 Where is he?

1219
00:57:01,592 --> 00:57:02,331
 Oh!

1220
00:57:02,462 --> 00:57:03,855
Huge!

1221
00:57:03,985 --> 00:57:05,334
[inaudible]
- Rascal!

1222
00:57:05,465 --> 00:57:06,379
 Rat!
Rat!

1223
00:57:06,510 --> 00:57:07,336
 Rascal, don't do this to me.

1224
00:57:07,467 --> 00:57:09,295
 Furry thing on the table!

1225
00:57:09,426 --> 00:57:10,209
He's on the table!

1226
00:57:10,339 --> 00:57:11,297
 Hold it!

1227
00:57:11,428 --> 00:57:12,820
 What are you doing, Bob?

1228
00:57:12,951 --> 00:57:13,821
Don't move.

1229
00:57:13,952 --> 00:57:15,170
 What are you doing, Bob?

1230
00:57:15,301 --> 00:57:16,171
[squeak]

1231
00:57:18,260 --> 00:57:19,653
[squeaking]

1232
00:57:20,698 --> 00:57:23,004
[screaming]

1233
00:57:23,744 --> 00:57:24,441
 Rascal.

1234
00:57:27,574 --> 00:57:28,967
[phone ringing]

1235
00:57:29,097 --> 00:57:29,837
 Oh, jeez.

1236
00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:34,625
I guess this is urgent?

1237
00:57:34,755 --> 00:57:36,191
 Of course it's urgent.

1238
00:57:36,322 --> 00:57:37,323
 Stay calm, Anne.

1239
00:57:37,454 --> 00:57:38,803
Do not explode.

1240
00:57:38,933 --> 00:57:39,760
 Too late.

1241
00:57:39,891 --> 00:57:41,327
I've already exploded.

1242
00:57:41,458 --> 00:57:42,067
I've dumped Jacques, and
I've kicked out the hamster.

1243
00:57:42,197 --> 00:57:43,285
What hamster?

1244
00:57:43,416 --> 00:57:45,374
 Oh, keep up.
Bob's taken over.

1245
00:57:45,505 --> 00:57:46,724
He spends more time
with my kids than--

1246
00:57:46,854 --> 00:57:48,160
 Than you do?

1247
00:57:48,290 --> 00:57:49,248
 Than butling.

1248
00:57:49,378 --> 00:57:50,684
It's exasperating.

1249
00:57:50,815 --> 00:57:52,207
 Have you fired him?

1250
00:57:52,338 --> 00:57:53,948
 I told him the hamster
has to leave immediately,

1251
00:57:54,079 --> 00:57:56,690
and I want this whole house
disinfected from top to bottom.

1252
00:57:56,821 --> 00:57:57,735
 Ah.

1253
00:57:57,865 --> 00:58:00,085
Sounds like someone has a crush.

1254
00:58:00,215 --> 00:58:01,042
 Huh?

1255
00:58:01,173 --> 00:58:02,043
I'm paying you for this?

1256
00:58:02,174 --> 00:58:03,349
I'm not paying you for this.

1257
00:58:03,480 --> 00:58:06,004
Don't you dare bill
me for this call!

1258
00:58:06,134 --> 00:58:06,918
Ridiculous!

1259
00:58:13,751 --> 00:58:15,927
 Oh, Rascal.

1260
00:58:16,057 --> 00:58:17,102
Who let you out?

1261
00:58:27,025 --> 00:58:28,287
You know what, Tess?

1262
00:58:28,417 --> 00:58:30,245
That was out of order.

1263
00:58:30,376 --> 00:58:33,161
If I was your father, you
would be in so much trouble.

1264
00:58:33,292 --> 00:58:34,075
You dig?

1265
00:58:34,206 --> 00:58:34,946
 It wasn't me.

1266
00:58:35,076 --> 00:58:37,296
 Yeah, whatever.

1267
00:58:37,426 --> 00:58:38,210
 Whatever.

1268
00:58:51,310 --> 00:58:52,877
Bates?

1269
00:58:53,007 --> 00:58:53,704
Was it you?

1270
00:58:56,794 --> 00:58:58,012
Aw, Bates, why?

1271
00:58:58,143 --> 00:58:59,666
Come on.

1272
00:58:59,797 --> 00:59:00,537
Talk to me, buddy.

1273
00:59:04,149 --> 00:59:05,106
 I didn't make the team.

1274
00:59:07,979 --> 00:59:08,762
 You didn't?

1275
00:59:08,893 --> 00:59:09,981
OK.

1276
00:59:10,111 --> 00:59:11,591
That's a shame.

1277
00:59:11,722 --> 00:59:13,288
 I didn't make the team!

1278
00:59:13,419 --> 00:59:14,855
You said I would!

1279
00:59:14,986 --> 00:59:16,248
 Well, I never said that.

1280
00:59:16,378 --> 00:59:18,424
I said I would help.

1281
00:59:18,555 --> 00:59:21,035
I said I would try.

1282
00:59:21,166 --> 00:59:23,908
 Well, I wasn't good enough.

1283
00:59:24,038 --> 00:59:25,736
 Not being good enough is--

1284
00:59:25,866 --> 00:59:27,389
life.

1285
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:29,914
But you'll find you're
good at something.

1286
00:59:30,044 --> 00:59:31,350
Everybody's good at something.

1287
00:59:31,480 --> 00:59:32,264
 Oh.

1288
00:59:32,394 --> 00:59:33,657
What are you good at?

1289
00:59:38,096 --> 00:59:41,186
 I can catch grapes my mouth.

1290
00:59:41,316 --> 00:59:42,666
[laughter]

1291
00:59:48,802 --> 00:59:49,586
 Mom?

1292
00:59:53,633 --> 00:59:56,984
I put Rascal in your room.

1293
00:59:57,115 --> 01:00:00,466
I didn't make the team.

1294
01:00:00,597 --> 01:00:02,120
 OK.

1295
01:00:02,250 --> 01:00:03,817
It doesn't matter, though.

1296
01:00:03,948 --> 01:00:05,471
I'll find something
to be good at.

1297
01:00:32,280 --> 01:00:35,066
 Hello, Mr. Butler?
Bob here.

1298
01:00:48,296 --> 01:00:49,123
[squeak]

1299
01:00:51,256 --> 01:00:54,302
 You'll look after him?

1300
01:00:54,433 --> 01:00:55,390
 Of course.

1301
01:00:55,521 --> 01:00:57,958
 Can I make you a cup of tea?

1302
01:00:58,089 --> 01:00:59,046
 Ah.

1303
01:00:59,177 --> 01:01:02,180
We have a regular little butler.

1304
01:01:02,310 --> 01:01:04,530
What's your name, master?

1305
01:01:04,661 --> 01:01:06,488
 It's Bates.

1306
01:01:06,619 --> 01:01:08,969
Just Bates.

1307
01:01:09,100 --> 01:01:09,840
 Hm.

1308
01:01:17,848 --> 01:01:21,155
 You're gonna be just fine.

1309
01:01:21,286 --> 01:01:22,679
 It's, like, an
initiation thing.

1310
01:01:28,293 --> 01:01:29,207
 I'll start you a room.

1311
01:01:36,823 --> 01:01:39,347
[knocking] How's
everything going?

1312
01:01:39,478 --> 01:01:40,218
 It's fine.

1313
01:01:40,348 --> 01:01:41,132
Thanks.

1314
01:01:59,237 --> 01:02:00,151
 Let's go.

1315
01:02:00,281 --> 01:02:01,369
 You got the stuff?

1316
01:02:01,500 --> 01:02:04,416
 No problem.

1317
01:02:04,546 --> 01:02:06,244
[alarm]

1318
01:02:06,374 --> 01:02:07,593
 Security!

1319
01:02:07,724 --> 01:02:09,421
[screaming]

1320
01:02:09,551 --> 01:02:10,378
 Let me go!

1321
01:02:10,509 --> 01:02:11,815
You guys lied!

1322
01:02:16,776 --> 01:02:17,559
 Purple.

1323
01:02:17,690 --> 01:02:18,473
Purple for general.

1324
01:02:18,604 --> 01:02:20,214
 What?

1325
01:02:20,345 --> 01:02:24,392
 Purple for general, yellow
for kitchen, blue for bathroom.

1326
01:02:24,523 --> 01:02:26,003
Purple for general.

1327
01:02:26,133 --> 01:02:27,047
 Right.

1328
01:02:27,178 --> 01:02:29,528
[phone ringing]

1329
01:02:32,661 --> 01:02:33,532
 Hello?

1330
01:02:33,662 --> 01:02:36,491
Hey, Bob!

1331
01:02:36,622 --> 01:02:39,799
It's for you.
- Hello.

1332
01:02:39,930 --> 01:02:41,322
Jamieson family butler speaking.

1333
01:02:44,499 --> 01:02:45,239
I'll be right there.

1334
01:02:48,373 --> 01:02:49,809
I have to go.

1335
01:02:49,940 --> 01:02:51,898
Will you be OK with
Mr. Butler for a while?

1336
01:02:52,029 --> 01:02:54,596
 Sure.

1337
01:02:54,727 --> 01:02:56,294
 Come on, Bates.

1338
01:02:56,424 --> 01:02:59,732
When we're finished here,
I'll teach you how to publish

1339
01:02:59,863 --> 01:03:02,213
silver by spitting on it.

1340
01:03:02,343 --> 01:03:03,127
 Cool!

1341
01:03:03,257 --> 01:03:04,041
 Yeah.

1342
01:03:07,958 --> 01:03:08,872
 Hey!

1343
01:03:09,002 --> 01:03:11,657
I'm looking for Tess Jamieson.

1344
01:03:11,788 --> 01:03:13,050
 Tough love.

1345
01:03:13,180 --> 01:03:14,791
We give kids a dose
of reality, scare 'em

1346
01:03:14,921 --> 01:03:16,444
straight before it's too late.

1347
01:03:16,575 --> 01:03:18,142
 This one's not like that.

1348
01:03:18,272 --> 01:03:19,621
 Oh, so you're one of those
"always looking for the best

1349
01:03:19,752 --> 01:03:20,622
in people" guys, huh?

1350
01:03:34,985 --> 01:03:36,073
 Don't worry about it.

1351
01:03:36,203 --> 01:03:36,987
This'll be our little secret.

1352
01:03:40,077 --> 01:03:42,079
 Bob, I'm sorry--

1353
01:03:42,209 --> 01:03:44,298
about everything.

1354
01:03:44,429 --> 01:03:47,519
I lied-- about the luau.

1355
01:03:47,649 --> 01:03:50,217
Our mom's practically
a vegetarian.

1356
01:03:50,348 --> 01:03:51,305
 I guess she is now.

1357
01:03:51,436 --> 01:03:52,219
Come on.

1358
01:03:52,350 --> 01:03:53,133
Let's go.

1359
01:04:10,324 --> 01:04:12,718
 Oh my god.

1360
01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:14,633
Bates!

1361
01:04:14,763 --> 01:04:15,590
 I'm standing still, Mom.

1362
01:04:15,721 --> 01:04:17,027
I can be a butler.

1363
01:04:20,117 --> 01:04:22,467
 Good evening, Miss Jamieson.

1364
01:04:22,597 --> 01:04:23,468
[clattering]

1365
01:04:31,041 --> 01:04:31,868
[pop]

1366
01:04:33,043 --> 01:04:34,609
 Tess, where have you been?

1367
01:04:34,740 --> 01:04:36,960
 I got hung up at Sophie's.

1368
01:04:37,090 --> 01:04:38,613
Bob came and got me.

1369
01:04:38,744 --> 01:04:40,485
 In that?

1370
01:04:40,615 --> 01:04:41,834
Both of you inside, now!

1371
01:04:46,883 --> 01:04:49,668
Bob, I have known
for quite some time

1372
01:04:49,798 --> 01:04:52,279
that you're not the
world's greatest butler,

1373
01:04:52,410 --> 01:04:55,369
but you at least seem
to care for my kids.

1374
01:04:55,500 --> 01:04:57,589
What kind of a man
leaves an eight-year-old

1375
01:04:57,719 --> 01:04:59,896
with a total stranger?

1376
01:05:00,026 --> 01:05:01,288
Stranger?

1377
01:05:01,419 --> 01:05:02,986
What am I saying?

1378
01:05:03,116 --> 01:05:05,466
A psycho, who thinks that
standing on the roof of a house

1379
01:05:05,597 --> 01:05:08,687
is good training?

1380
01:05:08,817 --> 01:05:09,862
 I'm sorry, Anne.

1381
01:05:09,993 --> 01:05:12,517
 Miss Jamieson.

1382
01:05:12,647 --> 01:05:17,696
 I'm truly sorry,
Miss Jamieson.

1383
01:05:17,826 --> 01:05:19,132
 I have to let you go, Bob.

1384
01:05:22,179 --> 01:05:24,921
I'll pay you to the
end of the month, but--

1385
01:05:25,051 --> 01:05:26,052
I want you to leave
in the morning.

1386
01:06:39,996 --> 01:06:41,562
 Let's not get
ourselves down, Rascal.

1387
01:06:41,693 --> 01:06:44,261
You keep going.

1388
01:06:44,391 --> 01:06:46,785
And I'll keep going.

1389
01:06:46,915 --> 01:06:48,656
[squeaking]

1390
01:06:50,919 --> 01:06:53,226
 To the end of ATBJ
Capital Management.

1391
01:06:53,357 --> 01:06:54,097
 Finally!

1392
01:06:56,751 --> 01:06:58,492
 Mm.

1393
01:06:58,623 --> 01:06:59,363
 OK.

1394
01:07:02,670 --> 01:07:04,977
 I don't feel like celebrating.

1395
01:07:13,942 --> 01:07:15,292
[knocking]

1396
01:07:17,859 --> 01:07:19,905
 Ah.

1397
01:07:20,036 --> 01:07:21,298
Why aren't you in school?

1398
01:07:21,428 --> 01:07:22,473
 Lunch.

1399
01:07:22,603 --> 01:07:23,909
What are you doing?

1400
01:07:24,040 --> 01:07:25,693
 Lunch.

1401
01:07:25,824 --> 01:07:28,087
Welcome to my home.

1402
01:07:28,218 --> 01:07:29,480
Nice.

1403
01:07:29,610 --> 01:07:31,569
 My natural state is messy.

1404
01:07:31,699 --> 01:07:34,093
 I'm sorry you got fired.

1405
01:07:34,224 --> 01:07:38,358
I just wanted the
cool kids to like me.

1406
01:07:38,489 --> 01:07:40,186
 You know, when I
was a kid, I used

1407
01:07:40,317 --> 01:07:43,189
to like building model cars.

1408
01:07:43,320 --> 01:07:47,889
But there was always one
piece, I could never figure out

1409
01:07:48,020 --> 01:07:50,370
where it was supposed to go.

1410
01:07:50,501 --> 01:07:53,373
I always felt like that piece.

1411
01:07:53,504 --> 01:07:56,289
I've spent my whole life trying
to figure out where I fit,

1412
01:07:56,420 --> 01:07:59,205
so when you figure it out--

1413
01:07:59,336 --> 01:08:04,167
well, that's good.

1414
01:08:04,297 --> 01:08:06,386
 So you're saying
it's good to shoplift

1415
01:08:06,517 --> 01:08:10,347
if it helps you fit in?

1416
01:08:10,477 --> 01:08:12,914
 I worked for a New
York designer once.

1417
01:08:13,045 --> 01:08:13,959
 You?

1418
01:08:14,090 --> 01:08:15,221
 Yeah.

1419
01:08:15,352 --> 01:08:16,657
I was just sewing,
but it was better

1420
01:08:16,788 --> 01:08:18,833
than a lot of jobs I've done.

1421
01:08:18,964 --> 01:08:20,139
Here.

1422
01:08:20,270 --> 01:08:24,012
Severance pay from
the sweat shop.

1423
01:08:24,143 --> 01:08:26,189
 Bob?

1424
01:08:26,319 --> 01:08:27,538
Can you teach me how to sew?

1425
01:08:41,029 --> 01:08:41,943
 Sorry for skipping out on you.

1426
01:08:42,074 --> 01:08:42,944
 Yeah.

1427
01:08:43,075 --> 01:08:45,686
We were, like, so cowardly.

1428
01:08:45,817 --> 01:08:47,340
 This is ace.

1429
01:08:47,471 --> 01:08:48,776
Did you steal it?

1430
01:08:48,907 --> 01:08:49,647
 I made it.

1431
01:08:49,777 --> 01:08:51,388
 Shut up.

1432
01:08:51,518 --> 01:08:52,432
I want one.

1433
01:08:52,563 --> 01:08:53,999
 Me too.

1434
01:08:54,130 --> 01:08:56,306
 Then wouldn't she be
wearing the same top?

1435
01:08:56,436 --> 01:08:57,524
 Yeah.

1436
01:08:57,655 --> 01:08:58,395
Like a club.

1437
01:09:04,575 --> 01:09:05,402
 Hey, Soph.

1438
01:09:09,536 --> 01:09:10,494
[whirring]

1439
01:09:10,624 --> 01:09:11,408
 Ah!

1440
01:09:11,538 --> 01:09:12,887
[knocking]

1441
01:09:15,499 --> 01:09:17,065
 I had the best day.

1442
01:09:17,196 --> 01:09:19,242
 Great.

1443
01:09:19,372 --> 01:09:20,634
 He followed me.

1444
01:09:20,765 --> 01:09:22,288
I want to be
good at something.

1445
01:09:22,419 --> 01:09:23,333
 Well of course you do.

1446
01:09:27,119 --> 01:09:29,817
You ever seen one
of these before?

1447
01:09:29,948 --> 01:09:31,602
Check, check, check, check.

1448
01:09:31,732 --> 01:09:33,473
 Check, check.
Check, check.

1449
01:09:33,604 --> 01:09:34,474
 Does it look all right?

1450
01:09:34,605 --> 01:09:35,780
 Wicked.

1451
01:09:35,910 --> 01:09:36,824
 I hope you're ready.

1452
01:09:36,955 --> 01:09:37,956
 Oh, god.

1453
01:09:38,086 --> 01:09:40,480
 It's showtime.

1454
01:09:40,611 --> 01:09:43,309
Thank you for
coming, ladies and--

1455
01:09:43,440 --> 01:09:44,876
just lady.

1456
01:09:45,006 --> 01:09:48,923
I am pleased to present
original creations by Tess.

1457
01:09:55,800 --> 01:09:59,107
In a stunning outfit of
skirt and top, retro chick.

1458
01:09:59,238 --> 01:10:00,587
That's our Sophie.

1459
01:10:00,718 --> 01:10:01,545
[clapping]

1460
01:10:01,675 --> 01:10:03,764
 Chic, not chick.

1461
01:10:03,895 --> 01:10:05,288
 Whatever.

1462
01:10:05,418 --> 01:10:08,769
And next up, the twins of evil.

1463
01:10:08,900 --> 01:10:10,031
Oh!

1464
01:10:10,162 --> 01:10:11,511
[applause]

1465
01:10:13,426 --> 01:10:18,866
 And finally, the heroine of
the hour, the one and only Miss

1466
01:10:18,997 --> 01:10:20,390
Tess!

1467
01:10:20,520 --> 01:10:22,827
[clapping]

1468
01:10:36,319 --> 01:10:39,147
[off-key music]

1469
01:10:45,719 --> 01:10:47,547
[knocking]

1470
01:10:53,118 --> 01:10:54,859
 Miss Jamieson.

1471
01:10:54,989 --> 01:10:58,819
 Yeah, I was just
in the neighborhood.

1472
01:10:58,950 --> 01:11:01,300
I wasn't, obviously.

1473
01:11:01,431 --> 01:11:04,085
I came to see you.

1474
01:11:04,216 --> 01:11:05,043
Come on in.

1475
01:11:12,964 --> 01:11:13,791
Here we are.

1476
01:11:19,318 --> 01:11:20,841
She's very talented.

1477
01:11:20,972 --> 01:11:23,888
 You've been so good with them.

1478
01:11:24,018 --> 01:11:26,456
But I know the truth.

1479
01:11:26,586 --> 01:11:29,633
 I just helped her
make a few dresses.

1480
01:11:29,763 --> 01:11:33,463
 You got my little
girl out of jail.

1481
01:11:33,593 --> 01:11:37,989
I got a phone call this morning
from a Detective Alvarez.

1482
01:11:38,119 --> 01:11:40,470
He said that he wished that
half the fathers that he met

1483
01:11:40,600 --> 01:11:44,125
were as loyal and
determined as you.

1484
01:11:44,256 --> 01:11:46,693
 Don't be too hard on her.

1485
01:11:46,824 --> 01:11:48,869
 I think you know
me better than that.

1486
01:11:49,000 --> 01:11:50,610
 I do.

1487
01:11:50,741 --> 01:11:52,438
 So, what's next for you?

1488
01:11:52,569 --> 01:11:53,787
 Well, I've got a job.

1489
01:11:53,918 --> 01:11:56,355
One of those butler cruises.

1490
01:11:56,486 --> 01:11:59,532
Around the world in 365 days.

1491
01:11:59,663 --> 01:12:03,884
 Well, uh-- that's
good for you.

1492
01:12:04,015 --> 01:12:05,451
When do you leave?

1493
01:12:05,582 --> 01:12:08,628
 First thing Saturday.

1494
01:12:08,759 --> 01:12:12,937
 Oh, um-- well, these
are for tomorrow.

1495
01:12:15,853 --> 01:12:17,158
 Oh, wow.

1496
01:12:17,289 --> 01:12:18,334
I love the trumpet.

1497
01:12:18,464 --> 01:12:19,509
 Yeah.

1498
01:12:19,639 --> 01:12:21,119
Jacques and I were
supposed to go,

1499
01:12:21,249 --> 01:12:23,208
but I thought maybe you
had someone special.

1500
01:12:25,776 --> 01:12:26,559
 No.

1501
01:12:31,564 --> 01:12:32,826
 Well, I guess we, um--

1502
01:12:32,957 --> 01:12:34,611
we each could take one.

1503
01:12:34,741 --> 01:12:35,525
 Sure.

1504
01:12:38,919 --> 01:12:41,313
 OK, then.

1505
01:12:41,444 --> 01:12:44,055
 OK.

1506
01:12:44,185 --> 01:12:46,362
 OK, well, I'll
see you there, then.

1507
01:12:46,492 --> 01:12:47,667
8:00 tomorrow.

1508
01:12:47,798 --> 01:12:48,538
 OK.

1509
01:12:55,632 --> 01:12:57,677
It's not a date.

1510
01:12:57,808 --> 01:12:58,591
 It's a date.

1511
01:12:58,722 --> 01:12:59,549
 It is not.

1512
01:12:59,679 --> 01:13:00,767
 Is.

1513
01:13:00,898 --> 01:13:01,768
 It's not a date.

1514
01:13:01,899 --> 01:13:02,726
A date?

1515
01:13:02,856 --> 01:13:03,683
Ha.

1516
01:13:03,814 --> 01:13:05,468
We're just two people.

1517
01:13:05,598 --> 01:13:08,949
Two individual people who happen
to be going to the same place

1518
01:13:09,080 --> 01:13:10,603
at the same time.

1519
01:13:10,734 --> 01:13:12,997
All I did was give
Bob my extra ticket.

1520
01:13:13,127 --> 01:13:15,695
 It's so a date.

1521
01:13:15,826 --> 01:13:16,740
 Who's going on a date?

1522
01:13:16,870 --> 01:13:17,697
 Mom.

1523
01:13:17,828 --> 01:13:19,177
With Bob.

1524
01:13:19,307 --> 01:13:20,178
 Awesome!

1525
01:13:24,269 --> 01:13:26,619
[phone ringing]

1526
01:13:28,752 --> 01:13:30,057
 Hello?

1527
01:13:30,188 --> 01:13:33,583
JACQUES: What are you
doing at this moment?

1528
01:13:33,713 --> 01:13:34,540
[beep]

1529
01:13:35,585 --> 01:13:37,500
[toilet flushing]

1530
01:13:39,676 --> 01:13:41,068
 Ew.

1531
01:13:41,199 --> 01:13:43,636
 I'm taking care of my family.

1532
01:13:43,767 --> 01:13:46,683
I'm a single woman of a
certain age, remember?

1533
01:13:46,813 --> 01:13:50,861
 Ah, tonight we have those,
uh, tickets to the concert.

1534
01:13:50,991 --> 01:13:51,905
 Bye, Jacques.

1535
01:13:52,036 --> 01:13:53,472
 You will not use them.

1536
01:13:53,603 --> 01:13:55,605
You would not go alone.

1537
01:13:55,735 --> 01:13:58,259
Are you-- going alone?

1538
01:13:58,390 --> 01:14:00,392
 Are you jealous,
my little Jacques?

1539
01:14:00,523 --> 01:14:01,698
 Oh, easy.

1540
01:14:01,828 --> 01:14:03,526
 [FRENCH ACCENT] "Roberre."

1541
01:14:04,657 --> 01:14:06,224
 Roberre?

1542
01:14:06,354 --> 01:14:07,094
Boberre?

1543
01:14:10,184 --> 01:14:12,578
Bob?

1544
01:14:12,709 --> 01:14:16,147
 It's just a night out
with a beautiful woman,

1545
01:14:16,277 --> 01:14:18,802
who's stolen my heart.

1546
01:14:18,932 --> 01:14:19,759
[squeaking]

1547
01:14:19,890 --> 01:14:22,153
[knocking]

1548
01:14:26,810 --> 01:14:28,551
 I've got a doorbell, you know?

1549
01:14:28,681 --> 01:14:30,378
[knocking]

1550
01:14:32,380 --> 01:14:33,207
 We're here to help.

1551
01:14:33,338 --> 01:14:34,818
Let's see what you've got.

1552
01:14:34,948 --> 01:14:38,212
 Could you have knocked
a little more, maybe?

1553
01:14:38,343 --> 01:14:39,344
 Ugly.

1554
01:14:39,475 --> 01:14:40,345
Ew.

1555
01:14:40,476 --> 01:14:41,607
No.

1556
01:14:41,738 --> 01:14:42,956
Tragic.

1557
01:14:43,087 --> 01:14:44,305
Ew.

1558
01:14:44,436 --> 01:14:45,437
Gross.

1559
01:14:45,568 --> 01:14:46,307
No.

1560
01:14:48,614 --> 01:14:49,963
What's wrong with this?

1561
01:14:50,094 --> 01:14:52,096
 I'm kind of bored
of suits, you know?

1562
01:14:52,226 --> 01:14:53,489
 It's perfect.

1563
01:14:53,619 --> 01:14:55,447
What time is the concert?

1564
01:14:55,578 --> 01:14:57,405
 Doesn't take me
long to get ready.

1565
01:14:57,536 --> 01:14:58,319
 Maybe it should.

1566
01:15:07,415 --> 01:15:08,678
 Oh, hello, sir.

1567
01:15:08,808 --> 01:15:10,027
Can I help you?

1568
01:15:10,157 --> 01:15:13,987
 This is the Cosmopolitan
Butler School?

1569
01:15:14,118 --> 01:15:16,207
 It is no more.

1570
01:15:16,337 --> 01:15:17,904
It is closing?

1571
01:15:18,035 --> 01:15:19,776
 I'm afraid so.

1572
01:15:19,906 --> 01:15:23,214
Not enough filthy
lucre to keep it alive.

1573
01:15:23,344 --> 01:15:27,740
 So, you trained the great Bob?

1574
01:15:27,871 --> 01:15:30,482
 What about Bob?

1575
01:15:30,613 --> 01:15:33,180
 Five day course.

1576
01:15:33,311 --> 01:15:34,704
[french]

1577
01:15:34,834 --> 01:15:36,923
You're not a professional!

1578
01:15:37,054 --> 01:15:43,190
Just a sad British man with
his sad little tradition.

1579
01:15:43,321 --> 01:15:47,804
So, now we have
Bob the liar, too.

1580
01:15:47,934 --> 01:15:55,507
 If I may say so, sir, Bob
Tree is a finer man than most.

1581
01:15:55,638 --> 01:15:57,248
And it has been an
honor to know him.

1582
01:15:57,378 --> 01:15:58,249
 Oh, boo.

1583
01:16:04,255 --> 01:16:05,125
 Wow.

1584
01:16:05,256 --> 01:16:07,867
 Mom, is that you?

1585
01:16:07,998 --> 01:16:10,087
 I'll take that as a
compliment, I think.

1586
01:16:10,217 --> 01:16:12,742
Now, don't stay up too late.

1587
01:16:12,872 --> 01:16:13,960
You're sure it's not too much?

1588
01:16:14,091 --> 01:16:14,961
 You're a hottie.

1589
01:16:15,092 --> 01:16:16,441
 That's a good thing, right?

1590
01:16:16,572 --> 01:16:17,573
It's not too risque?

1591
01:16:17,703 --> 01:16:18,661
 If you've got it, flaunt it.

1592
01:16:18,791 --> 01:16:20,706
That's what I always say.

1593
01:16:20,837 --> 01:16:23,535
 You'd better not say that.

1594
01:16:23,666 --> 01:16:24,405
Goodnight.

1595
01:16:52,695 --> 01:16:53,478
 You're early.

1596
01:16:57,090 --> 01:16:57,917
 Yes, I am.

1597
01:17:34,693 --> 01:17:39,393
You look-- radiant.

1598
01:17:39,524 --> 01:17:41,004
 You said it yourself.

1599
01:17:41,134 --> 01:17:42,396
I have a very talented daughter.

1600
01:17:46,052 --> 01:17:48,794
[trumpet music]

1601
01:18:02,460 --> 01:18:03,548
- Yeah, I couldn't believe it.
- Whoa.

1602
01:18:03,679 --> 01:18:04,767
Ticket please, sir.

1603
01:18:04,897 --> 01:18:06,029
 Oh, my-- my ticket,
it's in there.

1604
01:18:06,159 --> 01:18:07,030
Bob has it.

1605
01:18:07,160 --> 01:18:08,118
 Bob who?

1606
01:18:08,248 --> 01:18:09,162
 Uh, Bob has my ticket.
Bob.

1607
01:18:09,293 --> 01:18:11,382
Bob.
Bob.

1608
01:18:11,512 --> 01:18:12,296
Oh--

1609
01:18:18,911 --> 01:18:19,782
 Forget it.

1610
01:18:19,912 --> 01:18:21,261
 Oh, come on.

1611
01:18:21,392 --> 01:18:24,264
[trumpet music]

1612
01:18:52,771 --> 01:18:54,120
 It's like a dream, isn't it?

1613
01:18:58,777 --> 01:19:01,084
[trumpet music]

1614
01:19:04,217 --> 01:19:06,611
[applause]

1615
01:19:09,832 --> 01:19:11,529
 You want to go backstage?

1616
01:19:11,659 --> 01:19:13,052
 I don't think we're allowed.

1617
01:19:13,183 --> 01:19:17,013
 All right, we'll go backstage.

1618
01:19:17,143 --> 01:19:17,970
 Bob?

1619
01:19:18,101 --> 01:19:19,363
Yeah!

1620
01:19:19,493 --> 01:19:20,320
 Hi, Bob.

1621
01:19:20,451 --> 01:19:22,235
- How you doing?
- Bob?

1622
01:19:22,366 --> 01:19:23,149
Bob!

1623
01:19:23,280 --> 01:19:24,760
 Mama Clara.

1624
01:19:24,890 --> 01:19:26,936
She fired me.

1625
01:19:27,066 --> 01:19:29,460
 Are you sure we can do this?

1626
01:19:29,590 --> 01:19:30,678
 Bob, is that you?

1627
01:19:30,809 --> 01:19:31,592
 Vince.

1628
01:19:34,508 --> 01:19:35,553
How you doing?
- Good.

1629
01:19:35,683 --> 01:19:36,728
How are you?

1630
01:19:36,859 --> 01:19:38,034
Good to see ya.

1631
01:19:38,164 --> 01:19:39,687
 I want you to meet
a friend of mine.

1632
01:19:39,818 --> 01:19:41,428
Anne Jamieson.
- Charmed.

1633
01:19:41,559 --> 01:19:43,169
 The pleasure is mine.

1634
01:19:43,300 --> 01:19:45,302
You know, a few of us are
going out for something to eat.

1635
01:19:45,432 --> 01:19:48,479
Would you and your date
like to, uh, go with us?

1636
01:19:48,609 --> 01:19:49,697
 She's not a date.

1637
01:19:49,828 --> 01:19:51,395
 Uh, we'd love to.

1638
01:19:51,525 --> 01:19:53,092
 Fantastic.

1639
01:19:53,223 --> 01:19:54,354
 I-- I saw them go back there.

1640
01:19:54,485 --> 01:19:55,268
 Who?

1641
01:19:55,399 --> 01:19:56,400
 Oh, uh, Bob.

1642
01:19:56,530 --> 01:19:57,836
Bob.

1643
01:19:57,967 --> 01:19:59,185
Are-- are you deaf?

1644
01:19:59,316 --> 01:20:00,534
Hey!
Hey!

1645
01:20:00,665 --> 01:20:01,492
Hey!

1646
01:20:01,622 --> 01:20:04,408
[excited shouting]

1647
01:20:12,372 --> 01:20:13,721
[laughter]

1648
01:20:13,852 --> 01:20:15,288
 Whoa.

1649
01:20:15,419 --> 01:20:17,682
 You seem like you know
everyone in the whole city.

1650
01:20:17,813 --> 01:20:18,683
 Yeah.

1651
01:20:18,814 --> 01:20:20,685
Well, I've been fired a lot.

1652
01:20:20,816 --> 01:20:22,513
[laughter]

1653
01:20:23,688 --> 01:20:25,429
 It was a wonderful evening.

1654
01:20:25,559 --> 01:20:26,560
 Oh, Anne, your dress.

1655
01:20:26,691 --> 01:20:27,474
Your dress.

1656
01:20:27,605 --> 01:20:31,000
Oh-- your dress.
- Ah--

1657
01:20:31,130 --> 01:20:32,479
 Oh, jeez.

1658
01:20:32,610 --> 01:20:34,264
 Did you and Tess plan this?

1659
01:20:34,394 --> 01:20:35,308
 Yeah.

1660
01:20:35,439 --> 01:20:37,136
I-- I did teach her to sew.

1661
01:20:37,267 --> 01:20:38,659
Yeah?

1662
01:20:38,790 --> 01:20:39,660
 Bob!

1663
01:20:39,791 --> 01:20:41,619
But not for long.

1664
01:20:41,749 --> 01:20:44,970
If I weren't a gentleman,
I would kill you right now.

1665
01:20:45,101 --> 01:20:46,929
 Oh, Jacques, this isn't
any of your business.

1666
01:20:47,059 --> 01:20:48,800
 It is my business.

1667
01:20:48,931 --> 01:20:50,019
Put some clothes on.

1668
01:20:50,149 --> 01:20:51,455
 Don't you tell me what to do.

1669
01:20:51,585 --> 01:20:56,982
I'll-- run around stark
naked, if I want to.

1670
01:20:57,113 --> 01:20:59,028
 Anne, you have been fooled.

1671
01:20:59,158 --> 01:21:01,247
He is not a proper butler.

1672
01:21:01,378 --> 01:21:02,553
 Maybe I should just go.

1673
01:21:02,683 --> 01:21:04,294
 Oh, you think you
can just sneak away?

1674
01:21:04,424 --> 01:21:05,991
After what you did?

1675
01:21:06,122 --> 01:21:09,952
You cannot take advantage
of a middle aged woman!

1676
01:21:10,082 --> 01:21:12,084
 I am not middle aged!

1677
01:21:12,215 --> 01:21:14,173
Am I?

1678
01:21:14,304 --> 01:21:16,784
 You're beautiful.

1679
01:21:16,915 --> 01:21:18,612
 And I'm going to hire Bob.

1680
01:21:18,743 --> 01:21:19,875
 To do what?

1681
01:21:20,005 --> 01:21:21,615
He trained for five days.

1682
01:21:21,746 --> 01:21:22,703
Five!

1683
01:21:22,834 --> 01:21:23,879
Cinc!

1684
01:21:24,009 --> 01:21:26,055
 You were going to hire me?

1685
01:21:26,185 --> 01:21:29,145
 Well, you really care for my
children, and they adore you.

1686
01:21:29,275 --> 01:21:30,320
 Anne!

1687
01:21:30,450 --> 01:21:32,452
This situation is intolerable!

1688
01:21:32,583 --> 01:21:34,324
 No, this situation is fine.

1689
01:21:34,454 --> 01:21:37,414
You are intolerable.

1690
01:21:37,544 --> 01:21:38,328
 Ah.

1691
01:21:38,458 --> 01:21:40,591
So, finni?

1692
01:21:40,721 --> 01:21:42,114
Over!

1693
01:21:42,245 --> 01:21:43,333
 Au revoir.

1694
01:21:43,463 --> 01:21:44,421
Good riddance!

1695
01:21:44,551 --> 01:21:45,335
 Talk to my hand!

1696
01:21:48,686 --> 01:21:49,513
 So, would you--

1697
01:21:49,643 --> 01:21:51,515
come back to work?

1698
01:21:51,645 --> 01:21:53,343
The children miss you, and--

1699
01:21:53,473 --> 01:21:55,911
well, we all miss you.

1700
01:21:56,041 --> 01:21:57,216
 I can't.

1701
01:21:57,347 --> 01:21:59,088
 I don't understand?

1702
01:21:59,218 --> 01:22:00,393
 It wouldn't be appropriate.

1703
01:22:14,059 --> 01:22:16,975
 Are you going after him?

1704
01:22:17,106 --> 01:22:18,759
 He's leaving first
thing in the morning.

1705
01:22:35,385 --> 01:22:37,735
 Get up, Mom.

1706
01:22:37,865 --> 01:22:39,737
 Tess, what are you doing?

1707
01:22:39,867 --> 01:22:43,001
 Why did you work
this hard, Mom?

1708
01:22:43,132 --> 01:22:45,177
You're all alone.

1709
01:22:45,308 --> 01:22:46,657
 Mom, he's part of our family.

1710
01:22:58,147 --> 01:22:59,148
 Stay here.

1711
01:22:59,278 --> 01:23:00,497
 Go, Mom!

1712
01:23:00,627 --> 01:23:01,541
BATES: Go, Mom!

1713
01:23:01,672 --> 01:23:03,021
 Go, Mom!
Go, Mom!

1714
01:23:03,152 --> 01:23:04,022
 Go, Mom!

1715
01:23:04,153 --> 01:23:05,023
Go, Mom!

1716
01:23:05,154 --> 01:23:05,893
Go, Mom!

1717
01:23:10,115 --> 01:23:11,464
Go, Mom!

1718
01:23:11,595 --> 01:23:12,465
Go, Mom!

1719
01:23:12,596 --> 01:23:13,553
Go, Mom!

1720
01:23:13,684 --> 01:23:14,467
Go, Mom!

1721
01:23:20,604 --> 01:23:21,474
Go, Mom!

1722
01:23:21,605 --> 01:23:22,345
Go, Mom!

1723
01:23:26,871 --> 01:23:27,654
 What happened?

1724
01:23:31,571 --> 01:23:32,355
That happened.

1725
01:23:36,837 --> 01:23:38,796
That's the butler cruise.

1726
01:23:38,926 --> 01:23:39,927
 You mean--

1727
01:23:40,058 --> 01:23:40,798
Bob left?

1728
01:23:50,286 --> 01:23:51,504
 What a mess!

1729
01:23:51,635 --> 01:23:52,418
A real mess.

1730
01:23:55,508 --> 01:23:56,379
It's a real mess.

1731
01:23:59,164 --> 01:24:02,428
 Maybe he'll come back?

1732
01:24:02,559 --> 01:24:03,734
 Get tidy, Anne.

1733
01:24:03,864 --> 01:24:04,648
Tidy.

1734
01:24:16,747 --> 01:24:17,835
I'm sorry, kids.

1735
01:24:17,965 --> 01:24:20,838
We lost Bob, and
it's all my fault.

1736
01:24:20,968 --> 01:24:23,275
But I want to thank you both.

1737
01:24:23,406 --> 01:24:26,496
I love you so much.

1738
01:24:26,626 --> 01:24:29,499
Both of you.

1739
01:24:29,629 --> 01:24:30,978
Please don't look
at me like that.

1740
01:24:36,810 --> 01:24:38,203
Huh.

1741
01:24:38,334 --> 01:24:40,640
They say that kids
bounce back, but--

1742
01:24:51,216 --> 01:24:51,999
Bob!

1743
01:24:55,525 --> 01:24:56,395
Bob!

1744
01:24:56,526 --> 01:24:57,527
 Hi.

1745
01:24:57,657 --> 01:25:00,182
 What about the butler cruise?

1746
01:25:00,312 --> 01:25:01,835
 I couldn't leave.

1747
01:25:01,966 --> 01:25:03,272
Thought I'd stay.

1748
01:25:03,402 --> 01:25:04,621
 Car washing?

1749
01:25:04,751 --> 01:25:07,145
 Well, it's early
on in the C's.

1750
01:25:23,640 --> 01:25:25,555
[laughter]

1751
01:25:26,643 --> 01:25:29,472
TESS: We love you, Mom!

1752
01:25:29,602 --> 01:25:31,909
[laughter]

1753
01:25:32,039 --> 01:25:33,954
 Hey!

1754
01:25:34,085 --> 01:25:38,872
SINGER: This is a song about
my desire to find work.

1755
01:25:39,003 --> 01:25:42,876
My desire to find a family.

1756
01:25:43,007 --> 01:25:46,097
 For the food we are about to
receive, and for my new dad,

1757
01:25:46,228 --> 01:25:47,881
Bob, we thank you, God.

1758
01:25:48,012 --> 01:25:48,795
 Amen.

1759
01:25:48,926 --> 01:25:50,406
 Amen.

1760
01:25:50,536 --> 01:25:53,583
 Oh, honey-- why don't I carve?

1761
01:25:53,713 --> 01:25:54,975
 Ahem.

1762
01:25:55,106 --> 01:25:56,977
That's a gentleman's job, ma'am.

1763
01:26:01,982 --> 01:26:02,809
SINGER: Check it.

1764
01:26:02,940 --> 01:26:05,203
[farting sound]

1765
01:26:06,813 --> 01:26:08,641
 Not again!

1766
01:26:08,772 --> 01:26:10,556
No!

1767
01:26:10,687 --> 01:26:11,557
[pop]

1768
01:26:11,688 --> 01:26:13,037
[squishing]

1769
01:26:13,168 --> 01:26:16,606
 Dinner is served.

1770
01:26:16,736 --> 01:26:17,824
SINGER: My name is Bob.

1771
01:26:17,955 --> 01:26:19,435
I'm looking for a job.

1772
01:26:19,565 --> 01:26:21,263
When I'm not getting fired,
I'm living like a slob.

1773
01:26:21,393 --> 01:26:24,266
Go through the phonebook
looking for work.

1774
01:26:24,396 --> 01:26:26,790
I wanna be an astronaut,
like Captain Kirk.

1775
01:26:26,920 --> 01:26:28,618
Flip burgers to make me a buck.

1776
01:26:28,748 --> 01:26:30,402
I burned down the restaurant.

1777
01:26:30,533 --> 01:26:31,664
It's just my luck.

1778
01:26:31,795 --> 01:26:34,580
I got another occupation
under my belt.

1779
01:26:34,711 --> 01:26:36,408
Keeping a job for two
weeks, I'm doing well.

1780
01:26:36,539 --> 01:26:39,585
Like the time at the barber
shop, gave it all I got.

1781
01:26:39,716 --> 01:26:41,848
Chopped off an earlobe.
It bled a lot.

1782
01:26:41,979 --> 01:26:43,633
He never said a lot.

1783
01:26:43,763 --> 01:26:47,680
He just screamed, and got blood
on my brand new blue jeans.

1784
01:26:47,811 --> 01:26:49,552
Oh, golly, gee, did it again.

1785
01:26:49,682 --> 01:26:52,424
I talk to my hamster,
my only friend.

1786
01:26:52,555 --> 01:26:54,513
Go through the phonebook
again, like a fool,

1787
01:26:54,644 --> 01:26:55,688
and I see something.

1788
01:26:55,819 --> 01:26:57,647
It's butler school!

1789
01:26:57,777 --> 01:26:59,257
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1790
01:26:59,388 --> 01:27:00,606
Bob!

1791
01:27:00,737 --> 01:27:01,564
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1792
01:27:01,694 --> 01:27:02,608
Bob!

1793
01:27:02,739 --> 01:27:03,479
My name is Bob, not Bobert.

1794
01:27:03,609 --> 01:27:04,871
Just Bob.

1795
01:27:05,002 --> 01:27:06,351
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1796
01:27:06,482 --> 01:27:07,744
Bob!

1797
01:27:07,874 --> 01:27:09,049
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1798
01:27:09,180 --> 01:27:10,399
Bob!

1799
01:27:10,529 --> 01:27:11,530
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1800
01:27:11,661 --> 01:27:12,575
Bob!

1801
01:27:12,705 --> 01:27:13,793
My name is Bob, not Bobert.

1802
01:27:13,924 --> 01:27:15,186
Just Bob.

1803
01:27:15,317 --> 01:27:17,057
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1804
01:27:17,188 --> 01:27:18,363
So I jumped on my motorbike.

1805
01:27:18,494 --> 01:27:19,582
Gonna be a butler.

1806
01:27:19,712 --> 01:27:20,800
Went to the school.

1807
01:27:20,931 --> 01:27:22,541
It was like no other.

1808
01:27:22,672 --> 01:27:24,326
They made me balance
plates on my head.

1809
01:27:24,456 --> 01:27:25,718
Yeah!

1810
01:27:25,849 --> 01:27:27,764
They made me make a
naked dude get dressed.

1811
01:27:27,894 --> 01:27:30,201
He dressed me up in
a suit and a vest.

1812
01:27:30,332 --> 01:27:32,247
Took me to the
rooftop for a test.

1813
01:27:32,377 --> 01:27:33,813
Made me climb to
the edge real slow.

1814
01:27:33,944 --> 01:27:35,206
Ha!

1815
01:27:35,337 --> 01:27:37,077
Looked at the ground,
and I got vertigo.

1816
01:27:37,208 --> 01:27:39,558
I thought about a woman
that I met the other day,

1817
01:27:39,689 --> 01:27:41,343
and the vertigo
stopped spinning.

1818
01:27:41,473 --> 01:27:42,648
It went away.
What?

1819
01:27:42,779 --> 01:27:43,606
It felt real good.

1820
01:27:43,736 --> 01:27:44,824
What can I say?

1821
01:27:44,955 --> 01:27:46,217
I think I'm gonna be a butler.

1822
01:27:46,348 --> 01:27:48,741
I'm on my way, cause
my name is Bob,

1823
01:27:48,872 --> 01:27:49,786
and I'm looking like a slob.

1824
01:27:49,916 --> 01:27:51,178
Bob!

1825
01:27:51,309 --> 01:27:52,136
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1826
01:27:52,267 --> 01:27:53,006
Bob!

1827
01:27:53,137 --> 01:27:53,920
My name is Bob.

1828
01:27:54,051 --> 01:27:55,313
Not Bobert, just Bob.

1829
01:27:55,444 --> 01:27:57,359
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1830
01:27:57,489 --> 01:27:58,751
Bob!

1831
01:27:58,882 --> 01:27:59,970
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1832
01:28:00,100 --> 01:28:01,363
Bob!

1833
01:28:01,493 --> 01:28:02,712
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1834
01:28:02,842 --> 01:28:03,974
Bob!
My name is Bob, not Bobert.

1835
01:28:04,104 --> 01:28:05,367
Just Bob.

1836
01:28:05,497 --> 01:28:07,934
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1837
01:28:08,065 --> 01:28:10,850
Went to the place, and
I got a job on the spot.

1838
01:28:10,981 --> 01:28:13,157
Living in the attic,
I didn't need a lot.

1839
01:28:13,288 --> 01:28:14,724
Take the duster, dust.

1840
01:28:14,854 --> 01:28:16,029
I attack this.

1841
01:28:16,160 --> 01:28:18,075
Drive the kids to
basketball practice.

1842
01:28:18,205 --> 01:28:20,773
I make dinner,
some kind of luau.

1843
01:28:20,904 --> 01:28:22,819
I wanna make the lady say wow!

1844
01:28:22,949 --> 01:28:25,387
But the lady comes home
and the pig explodes.

1845
01:28:25,517 --> 01:28:28,259
Messed up again,
that's all she wrote.

1846
01:28:28,390 --> 01:28:31,088
Pretty soon I'll be back
on the street, looking

1847
01:28:31,218 --> 01:28:33,220
for a job with nothing to eat.

1848
01:28:33,351 --> 01:28:35,919
And maybe I could be a
rapper, rapping on the beat.

1849
01:28:36,049 --> 01:28:37,529
Get you on the dance
floor, moving your feet.

1850
01:28:37,660 --> 01:28:38,965
Ha!

1851
01:28:39,096 --> 01:28:39,923
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1852
01:28:40,053 --> 01:28:41,316
Bob!

1853
01:28:41,446 --> 01:28:42,317
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1854
01:28:42,447 --> 01:28:43,274
Bob!

1855
01:28:43,405 --> 01:28:44,623
My name is Bob, not Bobert.

1856
01:28:44,754 --> 01:28:45,537
Just Bob.

1857
01:28:45,668 --> 01:28:46,886
Bob!

1858
01:28:47,017 --> 01:28:47,974
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1859
01:28:48,105 --> 01:28:49,411
Bob!

1860
01:28:49,541 --> 01:28:49,933
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1861
01:28:50,063 --> 01:28:51,326
Bob!

1862
01:28:51,456 --> 01:28:52,457
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1863
01:28:52,588 --> 01:28:53,328
Bob!

1864
01:28:53,458 --> 01:28:54,416
My name is Bob.

1865
01:28:54,546 --> 01:28:55,895
Not Bobert, just Bob.

1866
01:28:56,026 --> 01:28:58,376
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1867
01:28:58,507 --> 01:28:59,812
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1868
01:28:59,943 --> 01:29:01,205
Bob!

1869
01:29:01,336 --> 01:29:02,162
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1870
01:29:02,293 --> 01:29:03,947
Bob!
My name is Bob.

1871
01:29:04,077 --> 01:29:05,949
Not Bobert, just Bob!

1872
01:29:06,079 --> 01:29:07,385
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1873
01:29:07,516 --> 01:29:08,778
Bob!

1874
01:29:08,908 --> 01:29:10,040
My name is Bob, and I'm
looking like a slob.

1875
01:29:10,170 --> 01:29:11,433
Bob!

1876
01:29:11,563 --> 01:29:12,825
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job.

1877
01:29:12,956 --> 01:29:14,000
Bob!
My name is Bob.

1878
01:29:14,131 --> 01:29:15,828
Not Bobert, just Bob.

1879
01:29:15,959 --> 01:29:20,050
My name is Bob, and
I need to get a job!