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>> Jon: [ Distorted ] WHAT

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HAPPENS WHEN YOU TAKE A FAMILY

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00:00:04,538 --> 00:00:05,738
FROM THE WITNESS PROTECTION

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00:00:05,739 --> 00:00:06,469
PROGRAM...

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MOVE THEM TO NEW YORK CITY...

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AND GIVE THEM THEIR OWN REALITY

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SHOW?

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>> DA-DA-DA-DA, DO-DO *

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>> Jon: PREVIOUSLY, ON

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"DELOCATED"...

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* I WANT TO BE A PART OF

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NEW YORK CITY *

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WHAT THE [BLEEP]

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WHY ELSE WOULD I PUT MY FAMILY

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ON CAMERA AND RISK THEM BEING

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MURDERED IF I WASN'T IN A SWEET

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LOFT?

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THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT WORTH IT.

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>> Susan: [ Distorted ] I'M

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TAKING DAVID TO A HOTEL.

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I NEED TO FIGURE SOME STUFF OUT.

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>> Yvgeny: [ SPEAKING RUSSIAN ]

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[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

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>> Jon: IT'S ABOUT TIME.

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[ DOOR OPENS ]

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>> HEY, MIKE. GOOD TO SEE YOU.

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HOW'S THE SECRET SERVICE

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TREATING YOU?

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HEY, IT'S AMERICA'S NEWEST

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REALITY-TV STAR!

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>> Jon: HEY, IT'S AMERICA'S

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BIGGEST ASSHOLE.

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>> WHOA, J-

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>> Jon: SHUT UP.

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YOU SENT THE CAMERA CREW TO

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COVER THE GUY TRYING TO KILL ME?

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ARE YOU INSANE?

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>> Mike: YVGENY MIRMINSKY --

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MEMBER OF THE MIRMINSKY CRIME

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FAMILY.

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>> WELL, HE'S NOT A TRAINED

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KILLER, AS YOU MIGHT HAVE

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GUESSED FROM THE PAUL RUDD

44
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FIASCO.

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[ SILENCED GUNSHOTS ]

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>> Jon: OH, MY GOD.

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PAUL RUDD IS DEAD? AAH!

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>> JON, I KNOW YOU'RE NOT HAPPY

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ABOUT THIS, BUT I DON'T REALLY

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KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU.

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PART OF YOUR LIFE IS THAT THE

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RUSSIAN MOB WANTS YOU DEAD.

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WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, NOT

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COVER THAT?

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THAT WOULD BE LIKE DOING A

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REALITY SHOW ABOUT...

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JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE AND NOT

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SHOWING HIS, UH...

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BEAUTIFUL BODY.

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>> Jon: SUSAN?

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SUSAN.

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HEY, I THOUGHT THAT WAS YOU.

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>> Susan: OH, WOW.

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HOW'D YOU FIGURE THAT OUT?

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>> Jon: [ SIGHS ]

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>> Susan: OH, JON, THIS IS

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CHRIS, THE AGENT THEY ASSIGNED

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TO DAVID AND ME.

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>> Jon: HEY.

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GREAT TO MEET YOU.

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>> HOW YOU DOING?

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>> Jon: DAVID. [ CHUCKLES ]

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>> David: HI, DAD.

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>> Jon: I LOVE HIS OUTFIT.

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WHAT'S GOING ON THERE?

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>> Susan: IT'S A PHASE.

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>> Jon: OHH, WHAT'S GOING ON

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HERE?

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>> Susan: OH. YEAH, OKAY. OKAY.

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>> Jon: I DIDN'T THINK WE WERE

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ALLOWED TO ALTER THE MASKS.

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YEAH, I DIDN'T THINK SO.

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SO, WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S, UH...

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>> Susan: WELL, I, UM, I JUST

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WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW THAT, UM,

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DAVID AND I ARE GOING TO REMOVE

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OUR SKI MASKS AND OUR VOCAL

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HARMONIZERS FOR HIS BAR MITZVAH

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THIS WEEKEND.

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>> Jon: UH, NO, YOU'RE NOT.

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WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

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ARE YOU CRAZY?

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>> Susan: DO YOU KNOW WHAT?

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THIS IS END OF DISCUSSION.

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>> Jon: THERE IS NO DISCUSSION

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ABOUT THIS 'CAUSE YOU'RE NOT

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TAKING THEM OFF.

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>> Susan: THEN WE'RE IN

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AGREEMENT.

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I WILL SEE YOU SATURDAY.

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>> Jon: WE ARE NOT IN AGREEMENT.

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THIS IS NOT GONNA HAPPEN.

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SUSAN! ABSOLU--

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>> Mike: SEE YOU AT THE BAR

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MITZVAH!

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>> Jon: "SEE YOU AT THE BAR

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MITZVAH"?

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>> Mike: WHAT, DID I SAY IT

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WRONG?

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>> Jon: WELL, YOU SAID IT RIGHT,

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MIKE.

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HOW ABOUT "YOU KNOW WHAT, SUSAN,

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JON IS RIGHT -- THAT IS A

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TERRIBLE IDEA BECAUSE YOU'LL BE

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MURDERED ALONG WITH YOUR SON"...

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INSTEAD OF "SEE YOU AT THE BAR

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MITZVAH!"

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>> WELL...

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[ SPITS ]

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...YOU KNOW, DAVID'S BAR MITZVAH

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IS OBVIOUSLY NOT HAPPENING UNDER

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THE BEST CIRCUMSTANCES, BUT I'M

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STILL EXCITED.

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>> Mike: WELL, YOU SHOULD BE.

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IT'S A BIG DAY.

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>> Jon: NO, I KNOW.

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IT'S JUST THE ONE THING I'M NOT

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HAPPY ABOUT IS THAT, YOU KNOW,

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HE'S GOING THROUGH A BIG SKA

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PHASE RIGHT NOW.

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[ SKA MUSIC PLAYING ]

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AND INSTEAD OF CALLING IT HIS

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BAR MITZVAH, HE INSISTS

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EVERYONE CALL IT HIS

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"SKA MITZVAH."

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[ SPITS ]

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HEY, HAVE YOU SEEN MY SKINNY

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TIE?

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>> Mike: I LOVE SKA.

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>> Jon: REALLY?

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>> Mike: YEAH.

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A LOT OF US SECRET SERVICE GUYS

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ARE INTO IT, ACTUALLY,

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ESPECIALLY CHRIS.

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>> Jon: WHO'S CHRIS?

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>> Mike: YOU KNOW...

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YOUR WIFE'S AGENT.

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>> Jon: GREAT TO MEET YOU.

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>> Mike: MORSE SKA-CODA IS

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MOSTLY GUYS FROM SKAPOLEON,

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BECAUSE SKAPOLEON BROKE UP.

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>> HEY, GUYS. GET YOU A

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CAB?

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>> Jon: UH, WHERE'S JAY?

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>> WELCOME TO YOUR NEW HOME.

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MY NAME IS JAY. I'M THE DOORMAN.

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>> OH, JAY QUIT.

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>> Jon: WHY?

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>> I DON'T KNOW.

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>> Jon: UH, OH, WELL, I'M JON.

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>> OH, HEY. I'M JAY.

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>> Jon: YOUR NAME IS ALSO JAY.

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>> YES.

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>> BUT YOU'RE ALL SET UP IN 1H.

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>> David: IS THAT A FAKE

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MUSTACHE?

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>> Jon: DAVID!

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IS THAT A FAKE MUSTACHE?

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>> NO.

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>> Jon: UH, OKAY, THEN.

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NICE TO MEET YOU. YEP.

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[ DOOR OPENS ]

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[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

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HEY, MIKE, THIS IS MY MOM AND

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DAD.

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>> DOES IT -- HOW DOES IT STAY

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ON?

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>> Jon: I'M GOING TO CHECK ON

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DAVID.

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HE'S NERVOUS.

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>> SO YOU'RE NOT WORRIED ABOUT

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IT FALLING OFF DURING THE

183
00:04:38,846 --> 00:04:39,546
SERVICE?

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>> WE'LL TALK LATER.

185
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>> ALL RIGHT.

186
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>> Jon: [ SIGHS ]

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>> Susan: OKAY.

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>> Jon: WOW. ACTUALLY DID IT.

189
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WHAT A HUGE MISTAKE.

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>> Susan: [ Normal voice ] JON,

191
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DO NOT -- AND I MEAN DO NOT --

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RUIN TODAY FOR DAVID.

193
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>> Jon: NO PROBLEM.

194
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>> Susan: YEAH?

195
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>> Jon: YEAH.

196
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>> Susan: OKAY.

197
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>> Jon: GREAT.

198
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>> Susan: GOOD.

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>> Jon: MM-HMM.

200
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>> Susan: MIKE.

201
00:05:09,109 --> 00:05:10,439
>> David: [ Normal voice ]

202
00:05:10,444 --> 00:05:11,044
WHATEVER.

203
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:12,154
RELIGION'S ALL, LIKE,

204
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,075
HOCUS-POCUS, ANYWAY.

205
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OKAY, SEE YOU WHEN YOU GET BACK.

206
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:18,393
OKAY, BYE.

207
00:05:18,386 --> 00:05:19,286
>> Jon: WHO'S THAT?

208
00:05:19,286 --> 00:05:20,416
>> David: MY GIRLFRIEND.

209
00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:21,191
>> Jon: OHH!

210
00:05:21,188 --> 00:05:22,658
NEW YORK GIRLFRIEND ALREADY.

211
00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:23,116
NICE!

212
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:24,433
>> David: YEAH, SHE'S IN

213
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:25,825
BARBA-DOS WITH HER FAMILY, SO

214
00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,156
SHE CAN'T MAKE IT.

215
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:28,460
>> Jon: YOU MEAN BAR-BAY-DOS.

216
00:05:28,462 --> 00:05:30,662
>> David: NO, NO, I THINK IT'S

217
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:31,164
BAR-BIH-DOS.

218
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,104
>> Jon: HMM, BARBADOS.

219
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:33,399
>> David: RIHANNA PRONOUNCES IT

220
00:05:33,401 --> 00:05:34,471
"BARBA-DOS," AND SHE'S FROM

221
00:05:34,468 --> 00:05:34,968
BARBA-DOS.

222
00:05:34,968 --> 00:05:36,038
>> Jon: YOU MEAN REE-ANNA...

223
00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:37,136
>> David: NO, IT'S "RIHANNA."

224
00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:38,407
>> Jon: ...WHO'S FROM BARBADOS.

225
00:05:38,406 --> 00:05:39,906
>> David: NO, IT'S BARBA-DOS.

226
00:05:39,907 --> 00:05:40,537
IT'S NOT --

227
00:05:40,541 --> 00:05:41,881
>> Jon: YEAH, IT'S BARBADOS.

228
00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:43,935
LOOK, SON, I KNOW THINGS ARE

229
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:44,654
WEIRD RIGHT NOW.

230
00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:45,775
BUT I'M STILL YOUR DAD, AND I

231
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:46,909
WANT YOU TO PUT THE MASK ON.

232
00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:48,154
>> David: DAD, I DON'T THINK GOD

233
00:05:48,148 --> 00:05:49,778
WOULD WANT ME TO WEAR A SKI MASK

234
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:50,723
WHILE I BECOME A MAN.

235
00:05:50,718 --> 00:05:51,418
>> Jon: I SEE.

236
00:05:51,419 --> 00:05:52,719
GOD DOESN'T WANT YOU TO WEAR THE

237
00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:53,050
MASK.

238
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:53,793
>> David: YEAH.

239
00:05:53,787 --> 00:05:54,917
>> Jon: IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE

240
00:05:54,922 --> 00:05:55,492
TELLING ME?

241
00:05:55,489 --> 00:05:56,819
WELL, YOU'RE ON THE PHONE WITH A

242
00:05:56,824 --> 00:05:57,964
GIRLFRIEND YOU'RE TRYING TO

243
00:05:57,958 --> 00:05:58,958
IMPRESS BY SAYING, "AH,

244
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:00,129
RELIGION'S ALL HOCUS-POCUS,"

245
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,527
'CAUSE YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH

246
00:06:01,529 --> 00:06:01,899
HER.

247
00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:03,195
I GUESS GOD IS OKAY WITH THE

248
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:04,526
WHOLE SKA-THEMED BAR MITZVAH,

249
00:06:04,532 --> 00:06:05,872
BUT THE MASK IS TOO MUCH FOR

250
00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:06,196
GOD.

251
00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:07,669
[ SIGHS ] AND WHILE WE'RE AT IT,

252
00:06:07,668 --> 00:06:09,068
I GUESS EVERY SURVIVING MEMBER

253
00:06:09,069 --> 00:06:10,769
OF THE HOLOCAUST GOT NO PROBLEM

254
00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:12,511
WITH THE SKA-THEMED BAR MITZVAH,

255
00:06:12,506 --> 00:06:12,966
RIGHT?

256
00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:14,213
ALTHOUGH, WAIT A MINUTE.

257
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:14,877
I'M SORRY.

258
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,435
I GUESS TODAY WE GOT TO CALL IT

259
00:06:16,444 --> 00:06:17,854
THE "SKA-LOCAUST."

260
00:06:17,845 --> 00:06:21,775
THINK ABOUT THE MASK, PLEASE.

261
00:06:26,787 --> 00:06:27,717
>> Susan: GOOD.

262
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:29,221
>> Jon: WELL, IT'S HARD, YOU

263
00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:31,322
KNOW.

264
00:06:31,324 --> 00:06:33,064
MY WIFE'S AGENT, CHRIS, IS INTO

265
00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:33,490
SKA?

266
00:06:33,494 --> 00:06:35,134
>> Mike: YEAH, "RUDE CHRIS."

267
00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:36,858
>> David: RELIGION'S ALL, LIKE,

268
00:06:36,864 --> 00:06:38,074
HOCUS-POCUS, ANYWAY.

269
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:39,925
>> Mike: RUDE CHRIS.

270
00:06:39,933 --> 00:06:42,003
RUDE CHRIS.

271
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:57,794
>> David: [ SINGING IN HEBREW ]

272
00:06:57,785 --> 00:07:00,145
>> All: * AMEN

273
00:07:00,153 --> 00:07:02,623
[ SKA MUSIC PLAYS ]

274
00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:09,255
>> Jon: ALL RIGHT!

275
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:12,272
* I AM HAVING A GOOD TIME

276
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:14,935
* I AM HAVING A GOOD TI-IME

277
00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:15,595
>> David: DAD.

278
00:07:15,603 --> 00:07:16,873
>> Jon: * OOH, DEE-DEE-DEE-DEE,

279
00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:18,370
DEE-DEE-DEE-DEE-DEE *

280
00:07:18,371 --> 00:07:19,711
>> David: IT'S EMBARRASSING,

281
00:07:19,707 --> 00:07:20,067
DAD.

282
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:23,543
>> Jon: WHAT A BABY.

283
00:07:23,544 --> 00:07:24,884
>> Susan: DIDN'T DAVID DO A

284
00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:25,508
GREAT JOB?

285
00:07:25,513 --> 00:07:26,583
I'M SO PROUD OF HIM.

286
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:27,980
>> Jon: HE WAS TERRIFIC, AND

287
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:29,521
IT'S TOO BAD HE WAS NOT WEARING

288
00:07:29,517 --> 00:07:31,277
HIS MASK.

289
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:32,154
>> Susan: OKAY.

290
00:07:32,152 --> 00:07:33,252
JON, TAKE TODAY OFF.

291
00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:34,863
YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME, ALL RIGHT?

292
00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:36,315
>> Jon: OKAY, I'M WAVING THE

293
00:07:36,323 --> 00:07:37,633
WHITE FLAG THAT HAS BLACK

294
00:07:37,625 --> 00:07:38,655
CHECKERS ON IT, ALSO.

295
00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:40,159
>> I DON'T LIKE WHAT I'M HEARING

296
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:40,730
FROM YOU.

297
00:07:40,728 --> 00:07:42,228
>> SORRY TO INTERRUPT, BUT I GOT

298
00:07:42,229 --> 00:07:43,129
TO RUN.

299
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,060
GREAT PARTY. GREAT.

300
00:07:44,064 --> 00:07:45,104
>> THANKS FOR COMING.

301
00:07:45,098 --> 00:07:47,668
>> Jon: YEAH, THANK YOU.

302
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:49,168
>> Susan: [ Distorted ] THIS IS

303
00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:50,599
CHRIS, THE AGENT THEY ASSIGNED

304
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:51,544
TO DAVID AND ME.

305
00:07:51,539 --> 00:07:52,809
>> Mike: ROCK-STEADY CHRIS.

306
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,166
>> Jon: * I AM HAVING A GOOD

307
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:54,644
TIME *

308
00:07:54,642 --> 00:07:56,542
>> David: IT'S EMBARRASSING,

309
00:07:56,544 --> 00:07:57,084
DAD.

310
00:07:57,077 --> 00:07:58,407
>> Susan: [ Normal voice ] WE

311
00:07:58,411 --> 00:07:59,681
JUST WANTED TO SAY THANK YOU

312
00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:02,550
SO MUCH FOR COMING, ESPECIALLY

313
00:08:02,550 --> 00:08:03,950
TO OUR OUT-OF-TOWN GUESTS.

314
00:08:03,951 --> 00:08:05,921
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

315
00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:09,189
BUT MAINLY TO DAVID, WHO DID SO

316
00:08:09,189 --> 00:08:11,629
GREAT TODAY, I JUST WANTED TO

317
00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:14,185
SAY "SKAZEL TOV" ON YOUR

318
00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:15,404
SKA MITZVAH.

319
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:16,795
YAY!

320
00:08:16,797 --> 00:08:18,867
[ APPLAUSE ]

321
00:08:18,866 --> 00:08:21,836
OH, AND ALSO, THERE'S LOTS AND

322
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,735
LOTS OF "SKATZAH BALL" SOUP.

323
00:08:23,737 --> 00:08:24,937
[ LAUGHTER ]

324
00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:27,708
YEAH, AND, OH, AND LOTS OF

325
00:08:27,708 --> 00:08:28,978
POTATO "SKATKES."

326
00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:30,036
[ LAUGHTER ]

327
00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:32,053
YEAH, SO, ANYWAY, EAT UP AND

328
00:08:32,045 --> 00:08:33,045
ENJOY.

329
00:08:33,046 --> 00:08:34,346
OKAY, THANK YOU.

330
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,077
OH, DID YOU WANT TO SAY

331
00:08:36,083 --> 00:08:37,893
SOMETHING?

332
00:08:37,885 --> 00:08:40,145
>> Jon: UH, YES, YES, EAT UP AND

333
00:08:40,153 --> 00:08:40,793
ENJOY.

334
00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:42,458
THIS IS ALL ABOUT DAVID.

335
00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:44,585
LET'S CELEBRATE.

336
00:08:44,592 --> 00:08:46,632
UM, REALLY QUICK, I DO HAVE TO

337
00:08:46,627 --> 00:08:49,357
THANK RICK AND EVERYBODY AT

338
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:50,432
COPY TOWN.

339
00:08:50,430 --> 00:08:51,800
THEY SPONSORED THE WHOLE EVENT.

340
00:08:51,799 --> 00:08:54,099
COPY TOWN COPY SHOP -- FROM BAR

341
00:08:54,101 --> 00:08:56,441
MITZVAHS TO BRISSES, YOU'LL SAY,

342
00:08:56,436 --> 00:09:00,636
"OY VE, NOW, THAT'S QUALITY."

343
00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:01,841
UM, BEFORE I GET AHEAD OF

344
00:09:01,842 --> 00:09:03,142
MYSELF HERE, I JUST WANT TO

345
00:09:03,143 --> 00:09:04,483
CLEAR UP IN CASE -- I'VE GOT

346
00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:05,947
SOME UNFAMILIAR FACES, TO ME AT

347
00:09:05,946 --> 00:09:06,776
LEAST, OUT HERE.

348
00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:09,320
I'M DAVID'S DAD. MY NAME IS JON.

349
00:09:09,316 --> 00:09:10,616
I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE NO

350
00:09:10,618 --> 00:09:11,918
ONE OUT THERE THINKS THERE WAS A

351
00:09:11,919 --> 00:09:13,649
BANK "SKA-BER" RUNNING AROUND.

352
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:15,124
[ CHUCKLES ]

353
00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:17,662
>> [ COUGHS ]

354
00:09:17,658 --> 00:09:19,158
>> Jon: OH, COME ON.

355
00:09:19,159 --> 00:09:20,189
BANK SKABER.

356
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:21,833
BANK ROBBER, BANK SKABER.

357
00:09:21,829 --> 00:09:24,829
ROBBER, SKA, SKABER.

358
00:09:24,832 --> 00:09:26,302
EASILY THE MOST CREATIVE AND

359
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:27,739
LEAST OBVIOUS SKA PUN OF THE

360
00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:28,795
NIGHT GETS NOTHING.

361
00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:29,542
I SEE. OKAY.

362
00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:31,096
I DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO DO THIS IN

363
00:09:31,104 --> 00:09:31,974
THE FIRST PLACE.

364
00:09:31,972 --> 00:09:33,372
YOU KNOW, I WOULDN'T EVEN BE

365
00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:35,983
THINKING OF SKA PUNS, WASTING MY

366
00:09:35,976 --> 00:09:38,006
TIME WITH IT, IF DAVID HADN'T

367
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:40,811
DECIDED TO DISGRACE GOD WITH

368
00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:42,184
A SKA-THEMED BAR MITZVAH.

369
00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:43,782
IT WAS HIS FIRST DECISION AS A

370
00:09:43,784 --> 00:09:45,454
MAN, AND I DECIDED TO GO WITH

371
00:09:45,452 --> 00:09:45,822
IT.

372
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,189
AND LET'S JUST HOPE HIS

373
00:09:47,187 --> 00:09:48,857
DECISIONS GET A LITTLE BETTER

374
00:09:48,856 --> 00:09:50,116
FROM HERE.

375
00:09:50,123 --> 00:09:51,363
OH, ALSO, I THOUGHT OF A PRETTY

376
00:09:51,358 --> 00:09:52,658
GOOD KNOCK-KNOCK JOKE TODAY THAT

377
00:09:52,660 --> 00:09:53,660
I THOUGHT I WOULD SHARE.

378
00:09:53,661 --> 00:09:54,831
YOU GUYS CAN TELL IT AT SCHOOL

379
00:09:54,828 --> 00:09:55,198
LATER.

380
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:56,125
HERE IT GOES.

381
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:57,299
"KNOCK KNOCK."

382
00:09:57,297 --> 00:09:58,467
"WHO'S THERE?"

383
00:09:58,465 --> 00:09:59,995
"THE FEDERAL AGENT."

384
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,970
"THE FEDERAL AGENT WHO?"

385
00:10:01,969 --> 00:10:03,899
"THE FEDERAL AGENT WHO IS

386
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:05,714
OBVIOUSLY TRYING TO PLANT HIS

387
00:10:05,706 --> 00:10:07,406
BONE IN MY WIFE'S FRONT YARD."

388
00:10:07,407 --> 00:10:08,107
SO OBVIOUS.

389
00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:09,578
IT'S LIKE EVERY TIME I LOOK,

390
00:10:09,576 --> 00:10:10,876
IT'S LIKE -- OH, REALLY?

391
00:10:10,878 --> 00:10:12,348
YOU CAN'T BE, LIKE, A LITTLE

392
00:10:12,345 --> 00:10:13,505
MORE SUBTLE ABOUT IT?

393
00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:13,983
JUST --

394
00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:14,651
[ FEEDBACK ]

395
00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:15,918
HEY, GIVE ME THE MICROPHONE

396
00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:16,316
BACK.

397
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:17,416
>> Mike: JON, LET'S GO.

398
00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:18,817
>> Jon: GIVE ME THE MICROPHONE.

399
00:10:18,819 --> 00:10:20,149
OR DO YOU WANT TO HAVE A GANG

400
00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:21,553
BANG WITH ALL YOUR SKA BUDDIES

401
00:10:21,554 --> 00:10:22,924
WITH MY WIFE AT THE SKA CLUB?

402
00:10:22,923 --> 00:10:24,163
>> Mike: SORRY, EVERYBODY.

403
00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:24,857
>> Jon: MOVE.

404
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:27,128
>> Mike: UH, SKAZEL TOV.

405
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,397
>> GET SOME AIR.

406
00:10:28,395 --> 00:10:30,195
>> Jon: WHAT? GET SOME AIR?

407
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:31,527
GET SOME SKA. HOW'S THAT?

408
00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:33,001
>> Susan: PUT SOME MUSIC ON.

409
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:36,200
JUST -- THERE'S MORE DANCING.

410
00:10:36,203 --> 00:10:36,873
UM, THANKS.

411
00:10:36,870 --> 00:10:38,510
>> Jon: HEY, DON'T FORGET I PAID

412
00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:39,335
FOR THIS, TOO.

413
00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:40,709
I PAID FOR EVERYTHING THAT

414
00:10:40,708 --> 00:10:42,208
YOU'RE EATING, AND I PAID FOR

415
00:10:42,209 --> 00:10:43,779
EVERYTHING THAT YOU'RE GONNA GO

416
00:10:43,777 --> 00:10:44,977
TO THE BATHROOM LATER.

417
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,378
WHEN THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR

418
00:10:46,379 --> 00:10:47,649
BODY, I PAID FOR THAT.

419
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,177
YOU'LL THANK ME FOR IT WHEN

420
00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:50,522
YOU'RE WIPING YOUR ASS.

421
00:10:50,517 --> 00:10:52,347
DON'T PUSH ME. YOU PROTECT ME.

422
00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:54,092
DID YOU FORGET THERE'S A RUSSIAN

423
00:10:54,087 --> 00:10:55,717
GUY OUT THERE RIGHT NOW TRYING

424
00:10:55,723 --> 00:10:56,463
TO KILL ME?

425
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:58,426
>> PLEASE GIVE A BIG ROUND OF

426
00:10:58,425 --> 00:11:01,255
APPLAUSE TO YVGENY MIRMINSKY.

427
00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:05,131
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

428
00:11:05,132 --> 00:11:06,902
>> Yvgeny: SO, UH, GAS PRICES

429
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:08,270
KEEP GOING UP AND UP.

430
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:09,568
IT'S CRAZY.

431
00:11:09,569 --> 00:11:11,199
I DON'T REALLY CARE.

432
00:11:11,204 --> 00:11:13,444
I'M JUST GLAD THAT CARS DON'T

433
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,840
RUN ON VODKA.

434
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:19,352
[ LAUGHTER ]

435
00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:20,746
>> Jon: * I AM HAVING A GOOD

436
00:11:20,748 --> 00:11:22,248
TIME *

437
00:11:22,249 --> 00:11:23,919
* I AM HAVING A GOOD TI-IME

438
00:11:23,917 --> 00:11:25,047
>> David: DAD.

439
00:11:25,052 --> 00:11:26,752
>> Jon: * OOH, DEE-DEE-DEE-DEE,

440
00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:28,064
DEE-DEE-DEE-DEE-DEE *