1 00:00:04,091 --> 00:00:07,049 All right, Dr. Patel will be administering 2 00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:09,138 the anesthesia now, so why don't you count back from five, 3 00:00:09,139 --> 00:00:10,922 and we'll see you on the other side. 4 00:00:10,923 --> 00:00:13,621 Five, four, three, 5 00:00:13,622 --> 00:00:18,278 two, one, zero. 6 00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:20,062 - Okay, great. - Now what? 7 00:00:20,063 --> 00:00:22,021 Oh, you're still-- yeah, that's okay. 8 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:23,848 You know, sometimes it takes a beat. 9 00:00:23,849 --> 00:00:25,981 Why don't you start naming some colors for me? 10 00:00:25,982 --> 00:00:28,679 Blue, yellow... 11 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,029 orange. 12 00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:32,031 Uh-huh, that's a good one. 13 00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,033 Periwinkle... 14 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,773 sienna, burnt sienna. 15 00:00:35,774 --> 00:00:38,167 Should I keep going? - Patel, what's the deal here? 16 00:00:38,168 --> 00:00:40,082 Let me just adjust the dosage. 17 00:00:40,083 --> 00:00:42,215 Some patients are resistant to anesthesia. 18 00:00:42,216 --> 00:00:43,694 It's just a matter of getting the dosage right. 19 00:00:43,695 --> 00:00:46,523 - Cerulean... - You can stop with the colors. 20 00:00:46,524 --> 00:00:48,482 All right, we should be good. 21 00:00:48,483 --> 00:00:49,613 Finally. 22 00:00:49,614 --> 00:00:51,702 Okay, let's do this. Gina? 23 00:00:51,703 --> 00:00:53,487 - Nope, I'm still here. - Jesus Christ! 24 00:00:53,488 --> 00:00:55,054 What is this guy, Wolverine? 25 00:01:10,244 --> 00:01:13,246 Again, no more tilapia in the microwave, okay? 26 00:01:13,247 --> 00:01:15,204 It smells like a mermaid gave birth in here, 27 00:01:15,205 --> 00:01:17,076 and I think we all deserve better. 28 00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,425 Now, last item on the agenda-- 29 00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:21,515 our operating margins once again have dipped. 30 00:01:21,516 --> 00:01:24,126 Zero gains--it's like we might as well not even be open. 31 00:01:24,127 --> 00:01:26,433 To that end, I need everyone to start 32 00:01:26,434 --> 00:01:27,738 doing a better job of recommending 33 00:01:27,739 --> 00:01:29,958 additional services to our patients. 34 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:31,394 You mean like upselling? 35 00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:33,222 We could push more plastic surgeries. 36 00:01:33,223 --> 00:01:35,224 A lot of our patients are fugly. 37 00:01:35,225 --> 00:01:36,921 Well, it's not upselling, per se, 38 00:01:36,922 --> 00:01:39,924 but I would like you to educate our patients 39 00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:42,710 about scan screenings, wellness practices, 40 00:01:42,711 --> 00:01:46,235 and then encourage them to use their insurance. 41 00:01:46,236 --> 00:01:48,411 So upselling--got it. 42 00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:50,065 How are the hospital's finances 43 00:01:50,066 --> 00:01:51,371 even our responsibility? 44 00:01:51,372 --> 00:01:52,589 We're health-care workers, 45 00:01:52,590 --> 00:01:54,200 not a bunch of sleazy car salesmen. 46 00:01:55,593 --> 00:01:58,117 Oh, maybe we could have, like, a sales contest. 47 00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,119 You know, whoever upsells the most 48 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,425 could--could win some kind of prize. 49 00:02:02,426 --> 00:02:04,297 Well, Ron, you are just gonna love this, 50 00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:05,602 because I was about to announce 51 00:02:05,603 --> 00:02:08,736 that we are having a sales contest. 52 00:02:08,737 --> 00:02:11,608 Anyone want to take a guess what the prize is? 53 00:02:11,609 --> 00:02:13,175 Hmm? Hmm? Hmm? 54 00:02:13,176 --> 00:02:14,785 What's that? A T-shirt? 55 00:02:14,786 --> 00:02:16,352 No. No, it isn't. 56 00:02:16,353 --> 00:02:18,137 I think we can do a lot better than that. 57 00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:19,268 Nobody said T-shirt. 58 00:02:19,269 --> 00:02:21,792 Dakota, start your rounds, please. 59 00:02:21,793 --> 00:02:23,142 I think that'd be good. 60 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:26,623 Uh, who would like to go see "zha" 61 00:02:26,624 --> 00:02:30,584 with some floor-seat tickets in Portland tonight? 62 00:02:30,585 --> 00:02:32,586 Wait, you got floor seats to SZA? 63 00:02:32,587 --> 00:02:34,936 That is another way people pronounce it, yes. 64 00:02:34,937 --> 00:02:37,895 And if you are interested, it certainly wouldn't hurt you 65 00:02:37,896 --> 00:02:41,464 to start promoting our brand-new, state-of-the-art 66 00:02:41,465 --> 00:02:44,250 luxury VIP patient recovery suite. 67 00:02:44,251 --> 00:02:45,512 I'm sorry. 68 00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:47,514 Why are we spending money on a VIP suite 69 00:02:47,515 --> 00:02:49,907 when this hospital is literally falling apart? 70 00:02:49,908 --> 00:02:51,431 I mean, there's been a leak by Zone B for, what, 71 00:02:51,432 --> 00:02:52,997 like, three weeks now? 72 00:02:52,998 --> 00:02:55,043 It's been 19 days. Stop being so dramatic. 73 00:02:55,044 --> 00:02:56,653 I'll follow up with maintenance. 74 00:02:56,654 --> 00:02:59,439 In the meantime, I want you to go out there and just... 75 00:02:59,440 --> 00:03:02,485 - Upsell. - It's not upselling. 76 00:03:02,486 --> 00:03:04,835 This is gonna be a big draw 77 00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:06,968 for our more discerning patients. 78 00:03:06,969 --> 00:03:09,666 All the linens are pure Egyptian cotton. 79 00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:13,322 Mm, It's like cool mayonnaise to the touch. 80 00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:16,499 And we've got wall-to-wall 5G Wi-Fi, 81 00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:18,501 which is the strongest kind. 82 00:03:18,502 --> 00:03:21,025 Drives marine life nuts, apparently. 83 00:03:21,026 --> 00:03:22,505 Hey. 84 00:03:22,506 --> 00:03:24,246 Well, the doctors didn't find anything, 85 00:03:24,247 --> 00:03:25,987 and all your vitals are within range. 86 00:03:25,988 --> 00:03:28,903 So the bad news is, you know, I hate to say it, 87 00:03:28,904 --> 00:03:31,427 but without a specific illness or injury, 88 00:03:31,428 --> 00:03:33,081 I--I can't keep you here, Ruth. 89 00:03:33,082 --> 00:03:34,517 I'm so sorry. - I figured. 90 00:03:34,518 --> 00:03:36,215 My cough always acts up in the cold. 91 00:03:37,347 --> 00:03:38,869 I'm sure it'll go away eventually. 92 00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:41,045 Ruth's what's known as a frequent flyer. 93 00:03:41,046 --> 00:03:42,917 She's a nice person, unhoused, 94 00:03:42,918 --> 00:03:44,962 just looking for a break from outside. 95 00:03:44,963 --> 00:03:46,529 I really wish we could do more for her. 96 00:03:46,530 --> 00:03:47,704 I just think, God, 97 00:03:47,705 --> 00:03:49,619 what if that were my grandmother in there, 98 00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:51,273 you know? 99 00:03:51,274 --> 00:03:53,406 I mean, I guess then we would be like, 100 00:03:53,407 --> 00:03:55,582 "Ah, zombie!" 101 00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:58,367 "Who did we bury?" 102 00:03:58,368 --> 00:03:59,716 Sorry. Sorry. 103 00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:02,415 No, it's--it's not-- it's not funny. 104 00:04:02,416 --> 00:04:04,373 Do you think I could get a blanket? 105 00:04:04,374 --> 00:04:06,201 That wind is just nasty. 106 00:04:06,202 --> 00:04:07,246 - Of course. - I'll bring it back. 107 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,377 It's yours. 108 00:04:08,378 --> 00:04:10,423 Just be careful out there, all right? 109 00:04:10,424 --> 00:04:12,251 And I wish we could do more for you. 110 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,297 I know. If you could, you would. 111 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,654 Man, what are you doing? 112 00:04:24,655 --> 00:04:27,178 Oh, it seems like a pretty straightforward job. 113 00:04:27,179 --> 00:04:29,746 I'm thinking saddle clamp, a little elbow grease. 114 00:04:29,747 --> 00:04:32,183 Yeah, I should be able to bang this out in no time. 115 00:04:32,184 --> 00:04:33,533 And you're basing this on what? 116 00:04:33,534 --> 00:04:35,491 You have zero training in this. 117 00:04:35,492 --> 00:04:37,101 Oh, come on. Sure, I do. 118 00:04:37,102 --> 00:04:38,320 I mean, what is the human body 119 00:04:38,321 --> 00:04:40,148 but an elaborate series of pipes? 120 00:04:40,149 --> 00:04:43,586 You know, veins, intestines-- it's all pipes. 121 00:04:43,587 --> 00:04:46,328 People are pipes. People are pipes. 122 00:04:46,329 --> 00:04:48,330 Man, let the plumbers do their thing. 123 00:04:48,331 --> 00:04:49,723 Oh, I see. 124 00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,377 You don't think I can do it. 125 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:52,856 I don't care. 126 00:04:52,857 --> 00:04:53,770 And, no, I don't. 127 00:04:53,771 --> 00:04:55,294 But, hey, knock yourself out. 128 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:56,425 I gotta go. 129 00:04:56,426 --> 00:04:57,557 Somebody stuck a Barbie doll 130 00:04:57,558 --> 00:04:59,950 in one of their pipes. 131 00:05:02,127 --> 00:05:05,652 And Bingo was his name-o. 132 00:05:05,653 --> 00:05:08,611 See, I think the whole idea of upselling patients 133 00:05:08,612 --> 00:05:11,440 on medical procedures is kind of gross-- 134 00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:12,833 I mean, like, really gross. 135 00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:14,269 It's just not the kind of thing 136 00:05:14,270 --> 00:05:15,488 I'd usually do. - Yo, dude. 137 00:05:15,489 --> 00:05:17,011 Did you see Paige and Dakota teamed up? 138 00:05:17,012 --> 00:05:18,795 Yeah, I was just talking about-- 139 00:05:18,796 --> 00:05:20,841 I high-key want those SZA tix. 140 00:05:20,842 --> 00:05:23,496 What if you and I team up, and if either of us wins, 141 00:05:23,497 --> 00:05:24,801 we split the tickets? 142 00:05:24,802 --> 00:05:26,325 Oh, yeah, 143 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,978 'cause then we'd have them, 144 00:05:27,979 --> 00:05:31,460 you know, like, the two of us together. 145 00:05:31,461 --> 00:05:33,332 Let's do it. 146 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:34,899 Great. 147 00:05:37,206 --> 00:05:38,511 Great. 148 00:05:38,512 --> 00:05:40,904 Really, it's all right. I know my way out. 149 00:05:40,905 --> 00:05:42,428 Yeah, I know. 150 00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:45,474 I just wanted to show you one quick thing before you go. 151 00:05:45,475 --> 00:05:50,349 And that thing is... 152 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,526 your new digs for the rest of the day. 153 00:05:54,310 --> 00:05:56,311 Wait. 154 00:05:56,312 --> 00:05:57,834 This is for me? 155 00:05:57,835 --> 00:05:59,662 If I get in trouble, I get in trouble. 156 00:05:59,663 --> 00:06:01,751 You know, my job is to help people, 157 00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:03,536 and, uh, I'm doing the right thing. 158 00:06:03,537 --> 00:06:05,581 So, you know, come at me, bro. 159 00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:07,670 Get comfy, make yourself at home. 160 00:06:07,671 --> 00:06:09,803 You can take a nap or watch TV 161 00:06:09,804 --> 00:06:12,196 or read a brochure on coping with lupus-- 162 00:06:12,197 --> 00:06:13,633 whatever you want. 163 00:06:13,634 --> 00:06:16,375 Hey, maybe "Shawshank Redemption" is on. 164 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,507 You know, I think it always is. 165 00:06:18,508 --> 00:06:20,335 I don't even know how to thank you. 166 00:06:20,336 --> 00:06:22,469 There's no need, truly. 167 00:06:25,210 --> 00:06:27,429 Wow. Egyptian. 168 00:06:27,430 --> 00:06:29,039 It's funny. 169 00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,564 This really isn't that different from the OR. 170 00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:33,696 You know, you mark the site, use a steady hand, 171 00:06:33,697 --> 00:06:35,219 and make a clean incision. 172 00:06:35,220 --> 00:06:36,656 And... 173 00:06:36,657 --> 00:06:38,135 that's the wrong spot. 174 00:06:38,136 --> 00:06:39,747 All right, well, take two. 175 00:06:44,708 --> 00:06:46,187 How's it coming, Luigi? 176 00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:47,797 That's good. 177 00:06:47,798 --> 00:06:51,018 You see, racist jokes can be funny. 178 00:06:51,019 --> 00:06:53,673 Well, I've identified the main problem area. 179 00:06:53,674 --> 00:06:55,762 Just about to attack the leak head-on. 180 00:06:55,763 --> 00:06:57,677 It just feels good to work with your hands, you know? 181 00:06:57,678 --> 00:06:59,200 You work with your hands all the time. 182 00:06:59,201 --> 00:07:00,419 Please. 183 00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,246 I don't mean those soft, fancy-boy hands 184 00:07:02,247 --> 00:07:03,683 you're sporting--no offense. 185 00:07:03,684 --> 00:07:05,728 I'm talking about man hands, you know-- 186 00:07:05,729 --> 00:07:09,906 calloused and sinewy, covered in grime and grit. 187 00:07:09,907 --> 00:07:11,212 Okay, I'm gonna let you 188 00:07:11,213 --> 00:07:13,388 get back to your blue-collar cosplay. 189 00:07:13,389 --> 00:07:15,259 Look, I just don't want to be one of those rich, 190 00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:17,218 spoiled doctors who always calls up 191 00:07:17,219 --> 00:07:19,046 some grunt to do his dirty work for him-- 192 00:07:19,047 --> 00:07:20,221 again, no offense. 193 00:07:20,222 --> 00:07:22,528 Hiring workers is a convenience. 194 00:07:22,529 --> 00:07:24,965 Obviously, if I had to do the job myself, 195 00:07:24,966 --> 00:07:26,270 I could. - Uh-huh. 196 00:07:26,271 --> 00:07:27,576 Hey, could you pass me that spud wrench? 197 00:07:27,577 --> 00:07:29,665 - Spud? - The spud, yeah. 198 00:07:29,666 --> 00:07:31,188 Okay. 199 00:07:31,189 --> 00:07:33,713 Uh... spud, right? 200 00:07:33,714 --> 00:07:35,715 - Yeah, it's right there. - I see it. 201 00:07:35,716 --> 00:07:37,325 I'm gonna just give you 202 00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:38,893 all these wrenches. 203 00:07:40,808 --> 00:07:42,983 You may want to switch out from that spud. 204 00:07:42,984 --> 00:07:44,550 Okay. Um... 205 00:07:44,551 --> 00:07:46,726 Up to six hours, including throbbing 206 00:07:46,727 --> 00:07:49,076 and sensitivity to light and loud noises... 207 00:07:51,514 --> 00:07:53,559 Hi. 208 00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:56,213 Um, can I help you with something? 209 00:07:56,214 --> 00:07:58,302 Thanks, but I'm doing great. 210 00:07:58,303 --> 00:08:00,261 Bogs and the sisters just assaulted Andy 211 00:08:00,262 --> 00:08:01,436 in the furnace room. 212 00:08:01,437 --> 00:08:03,090 I'm sorry, what I meant was, 213 00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:05,440 um, what are you doing in here? 214 00:08:05,441 --> 00:08:06,789 Oh, just resting. 215 00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:07,921 Nurse's orders. 216 00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:09,531 Uh-huh. 217 00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:12,186 Which nurse's orders? 218 00:08:12,187 --> 00:08:13,579 Got a minute? - Hmm? 219 00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:15,319 Hey, I'm just wondering about the woman 220 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:17,931 currently having a spa day in the VIP suite. 221 00:08:17,932 --> 00:08:19,236 Do you know anything about that? 222 00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:20,281 Yeah. 223 00:08:20,282 --> 00:08:21,282 You know what, Joyce? 224 00:08:21,283 --> 00:08:22,762 I do. - Mm. 225 00:08:22,763 --> 00:08:24,546 'Cause she said you told her she could stay in there 226 00:08:24,547 --> 00:08:26,548 without paying for it, which is the exact opposite 227 00:08:26,549 --> 00:08:27,897 of what I told you to do. 228 00:08:27,898 --> 00:08:29,116 Well, that's right. 229 00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:30,944 I did do that. 230 00:08:30,945 --> 00:08:35,818 I did, because, uh-- because that woman... 231 00:08:35,819 --> 00:08:38,255 Yes? 232 00:08:38,256 --> 00:08:40,823 She's an heiress. 233 00:08:40,824 --> 00:08:42,303 What? Her? 234 00:08:42,304 --> 00:08:43,783 Yeah, I know. Yeah, yeah. 235 00:08:43,784 --> 00:08:45,306 She, um... 236 00:08:45,307 --> 00:08:47,917 She comes from a very, very rich, 237 00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:50,572 very philanthropic family, the Dusseldorfs. 238 00:08:50,573 --> 00:08:52,139 I'm sure you're familiar with them, right? 239 00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:54,184 Oh, of course. How could I--how could I not? 240 00:08:54,185 --> 00:08:55,316 Yeah, yeah. 241 00:08:55,317 --> 00:08:56,360 So I figured, you know, 242 00:08:56,361 --> 00:08:57,579 we're having money problems. 243 00:08:57,580 --> 00:08:59,320 I would just give this rich lady 244 00:08:59,321 --> 00:09:00,364 the red-carpet treatment. 245 00:09:00,365 --> 00:09:01,540 She'd become our golden goose, 246 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,324 uh, but it was presumptuous of me. 247 00:09:03,325 --> 00:09:04,499 Sorry, I'm gonna go kick her out. 248 00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:05,848 No, no, no. No. No. No. 249 00:09:05,849 --> 00:09:07,502 You played it perfectly. - No? Oh. 250 00:09:07,503 --> 00:09:09,156 - Ah, I see you, girl. - Thanks. 251 00:09:09,157 --> 00:09:10,461 - I see you. - Yeah. 252 00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:12,594 Um, well, she's not gonna be thrilled, though, 253 00:09:12,595 --> 00:09:15,249 that I--that I--I outed her, 'cause she's, um-- 254 00:09:15,250 --> 00:09:16,946 she's a really private person. 255 00:09:16,947 --> 00:09:18,600 You know, she likes to blend in. 256 00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,820 So--so it might be best if you just don't mention it. 257 00:09:20,821 --> 00:09:22,604 Oh, I promise I'll be discreet. 258 00:09:22,605 --> 00:09:24,171 Okay. You know how the super rich are. 259 00:09:24,172 --> 00:09:25,781 Oh, yeah, it's all, you know, 260 00:09:25,782 --> 00:09:28,131 charcuterie boards and trips to the moon-- 261 00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:30,917 just eating little gherkins in space with the pinkies up. 262 00:09:32,833 --> 00:09:35,617 - I--I meant the anonymity. - Anonymity, yes. 263 00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:36,923 Yes, that's another thing. 264 00:09:36,924 --> 00:09:38,751 Do I need to wear it when I sleep? 265 00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:40,535 That's probably a good idea, 266 00:09:40,536 --> 00:09:42,189 at least for the first week or two. 267 00:09:42,190 --> 00:09:43,712 Great. 268 00:09:43,713 --> 00:09:47,150 But if you're looking to speed up your recovery, 269 00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:50,197 we do offer in-house acupuncture sessions. 270 00:09:50,198 --> 00:09:51,633 It's amazing for fractures-- 271 00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:53,330 really stimulates the blood flow. 272 00:09:53,331 --> 00:09:54,984 Yeah, that's not really my thing. 273 00:09:54,985 --> 00:09:56,203 Totally get it. 274 00:09:56,204 --> 00:09:57,944 Acupuncture has a lot of side effects-- 275 00:09:57,945 --> 00:10:00,990 increased muscle tone, sexual performance boost. 276 00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:02,470 It's not for everyone. 277 00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:04,037 I think I'm good with just the splint. 278 00:10:04,038 --> 00:10:07,214 Okay, well, since you're so obsessed with the splint, 279 00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:09,346 how do you like this idea? 280 00:10:09,347 --> 00:10:10,958 Two splints. 281 00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:17,050 But easily, the most common reason for a leak 282 00:10:17,051 --> 00:10:19,008 is a loose coupling nut. 283 00:10:19,009 --> 00:10:20,967 If working in a confined space, 284 00:10:20,968 --> 00:10:23,753 a basin wrench is going to be your best friend here. 285 00:10:25,276 --> 00:10:28,235 You know, it just occurred to me you might want to try 286 00:10:28,236 --> 00:10:29,671 tightening the coupling nut. 287 00:10:29,672 --> 00:10:31,499 I've had some good success with that in the past. 288 00:10:31,500 --> 00:10:32,718 You don't think I've tried tightening 289 00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:34,545 the coupling nut, Ron? 290 00:10:34,546 --> 00:10:36,330 Obviously, that was the first thing I tried. 291 00:10:36,331 --> 00:10:37,461 Tighten the coupling nut. 292 00:10:37,462 --> 00:10:38,724 Get serious. 293 00:10:38,725 --> 00:10:40,334 Well, did you use a basin wrench? 294 00:10:40,335 --> 00:10:42,075 Are you just getting this from the Plumber Jordan video? 295 00:10:42,076 --> 00:10:44,773 First YouTube result for "how to fix leaking pipe"? 296 00:10:44,774 --> 00:10:47,689 I came down to your level, and I hate it here. 297 00:10:47,690 --> 00:10:48,734 I'm going to lunch. 298 00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:49,691 No, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 299 00:10:49,692 --> 00:10:50,866 Ron, Ron, Ron, wait. 300 00:10:50,867 --> 00:10:52,476 Can you hold this clamp real quick? 301 00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:54,261 Please, just two seconds. Just hold it. 302 00:10:54,262 --> 00:10:55,610 Right there. 303 00:10:55,611 --> 00:10:57,438 Yeah, that's it. - Watch my finger. 304 00:10:57,439 --> 00:10:59,919 Uh-huh. Perfect. 305 00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:02,095 Oh, look who's done this before. 306 00:11:02,096 --> 00:11:03,270 Nice. 307 00:11:03,271 --> 00:11:04,837 Yeah, well, that's what I was saying. 308 00:11:04,838 --> 00:11:06,403 It's about to get pretty hairy, though. 309 00:11:06,404 --> 00:11:07,448 I can take it from here. 310 00:11:07,449 --> 00:11:08,798 Enjoy your lunch. 311 00:11:13,498 --> 00:11:15,412 Well, I mean, I have a couple minutes. 312 00:11:15,413 --> 00:11:16,631 Hmm? 313 00:11:16,632 --> 00:11:18,459 I ate a NutRageous bar a while ago, 314 00:11:18,460 --> 00:11:19,808 so my blood sugar should still be good. 315 00:11:19,809 --> 00:11:22,463 Ah. Welcome to the party, Mario. 316 00:11:23,552 --> 00:11:25,161 Knock, knock. 317 00:11:25,162 --> 00:11:27,642 Gosh, I just wanted to come in and apologize 318 00:11:27,643 --> 00:11:29,775 for being so dang rude earlier. 319 00:11:29,776 --> 00:11:31,602 We lost a patient this morning, 320 00:11:31,603 --> 00:11:33,953 and I was still in that emotional headspace. 321 00:11:33,954 --> 00:11:36,956 Oh, the patient died off-site, by the way. 322 00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:39,959 Yeah, no, we, um-- we got him healthy, 323 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,961 and then he went to another hospital and died there. 324 00:11:41,962 --> 00:11:44,485 Anyway, this is for you. - Oh, wow. 325 00:11:44,486 --> 00:11:46,139 - Yeah. Mm-hmm. - Thanks. 326 00:11:46,140 --> 00:11:49,011 Ooh, this looks warm. - It is. 327 00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:51,187 Not that a person like you needs more stuff, but-- 328 00:11:51,188 --> 00:11:53,537 Oh, believe me, I always like more stuff. 329 00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:55,191 I am the same way. 330 00:11:55,192 --> 00:11:58,281 Like, no matter how much you get, it's still not enough. 331 00:11:58,282 --> 00:11:59,718 I am a people person. 332 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,371 I love people. 333 00:12:01,372 --> 00:12:04,418 Do I also love the idea of a new radiology suite? 334 00:12:04,419 --> 00:12:05,724 Yes. 335 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,508 Robotics platforms in the OR? 336 00:12:07,509 --> 00:12:09,075 You bet. 337 00:12:09,076 --> 00:12:12,818 A big old helipad that sits atop a surgical amphitheater 338 00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:14,994 that hosts TED Talks on the weekends, 339 00:12:14,995 --> 00:12:17,300 Portland General crapping in their pants. 340 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:21,000 But mostly, I love people. 341 00:12:21,001 --> 00:12:23,176 So you think he's gonna go out the same way as Brooks, 342 00:12:23,177 --> 00:12:25,744 but then he ends up making it down to Zihuatanejo. 343 00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,834 Incredible. Incredible. 344 00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:31,053 Bit of a spoiler, but that's fine. 345 00:12:31,054 --> 00:12:34,753 Um, hey, what do you say I take you on a private tour 346 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,624 of the hospital, show you what we do around here? 347 00:12:36,625 --> 00:12:38,365 - I got time. - Okay. 348 00:12:38,366 --> 00:12:39,801 Stella. Stella. 349 00:12:39,802 --> 00:12:41,977 While we're gone, can you kind of freshen up the bed 350 00:12:41,978 --> 00:12:43,762 and spruce up the pillows? 351 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,067 Thanks, babe. 352 00:12:45,068 --> 00:12:47,026 What do you say we start in the maternity ward 353 00:12:47,027 --> 00:12:48,418 and see some babies? 354 00:12:48,419 --> 00:12:50,029 Adorable! - Oh, great. 355 00:12:50,030 --> 00:12:52,379 There's a 14-pounder in there right now. 356 00:12:52,380 --> 00:12:53,641 - Yikes. - A real chonker. 357 00:12:53,642 --> 00:12:56,079 I just want to bite his face. - Oh! 358 00:13:05,610 --> 00:13:07,437 When Bruce isn't saying anything 359 00:13:07,438 --> 00:13:08,830 for long periods of time, 360 00:13:08,831 --> 00:13:11,311 he's really not a bad guy to be around. 361 00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:13,313 Oh, and, look... 362 00:13:13,314 --> 00:13:15,097 it's a callus forming. 363 00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:16,533 Still in the early stages, 364 00:13:16,534 --> 00:13:18,013 but by tomorrow, 365 00:13:18,014 --> 00:13:19,885 coal-miner vibes. 366 00:13:19,886 --> 00:13:22,802 Hey, I brought you some tea... 367 00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:28,894 Hey, do you know where the lady who was in here went? 368 00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:31,548 Yeah, uh, Joyce went to take her 369 00:13:31,549 --> 00:13:33,376 on a tour of the hospital or something. 370 00:13:33,377 --> 00:13:34,551 What? 371 00:13:34,552 --> 00:13:35,901 Ooh, that's nice. 372 00:13:35,902 --> 00:13:38,904 Oh, yes, that is one of my personal favorites. 373 00:13:38,905 --> 00:13:41,036 Ah, of course, it's just a print, but who knows? 374 00:13:41,037 --> 00:13:43,604 Maybe one day we'll have a real Monet in here. 375 00:13:43,605 --> 00:13:46,520 - Oh, that would be amazing. - Wouldn't it be? 376 00:13:46,521 --> 00:13:48,174 Hey. Oh. 377 00:13:48,175 --> 00:13:49,392 What you doing, girlfriends? 378 00:13:49,393 --> 00:13:50,567 What you talking about? 379 00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:52,308 Oh, Ruth and I are just discussing 380 00:13:52,309 --> 00:13:54,136 our mutual love of art. - Hmm. 381 00:13:54,137 --> 00:13:56,747 Oh, you must have some wonderful pieces in your home. 382 00:13:56,748 --> 00:13:58,445 Oh, I don't really have a home. 383 00:13:58,446 --> 00:14:00,751 Oh, yeah, I so get that, right, you know? 384 00:14:00,752 --> 00:14:02,144 You're coming, and you're going, 385 00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:03,798 and one week you're in Nice, 386 00:14:03,799 --> 00:14:05,191 and one week you're in Vail, right? 387 00:14:05,192 --> 00:14:06,235 You know, you're everywhere, 388 00:14:06,236 --> 00:14:07,889 and yet you're nowhere, so... 389 00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:10,892 Oh, boy, it has been such a day, though, huh? 390 00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:12,763 You must be dying to get back in that big, comfy bed. 391 00:14:12,764 --> 00:14:14,417 This firecracker? Are you kidding me? 392 00:14:14,418 --> 00:14:16,593 She's got more energy than I do. 393 00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,900 In fact, why don't we go storm the gift shop 394 00:14:18,901 --> 00:14:21,685 and then we'll snag some brownies in the cafeteria? 395 00:14:21,686 --> 00:14:23,557 They are a triumph. - Hey, why don't I take her? 396 00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:25,167 You've got important things to do. 397 00:14:25,168 --> 00:14:26,603 Nothing is more important 398 00:14:26,604 --> 00:14:28,344 than this little lady right here. 399 00:14:28,345 --> 00:14:31,608 Now, let's get 5 CCs of brownie into that mouth, stat. 400 00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:32,740 I'm kidding. 401 00:14:32,741 --> 00:14:34,437 5 CCs is barely anything. 402 00:14:34,438 --> 00:14:38,485 Yeah, I'm happy that Ruth is inside and thriving, frankly, 403 00:14:38,486 --> 00:14:40,269 but I'm a little n-nervous. 404 00:14:40,270 --> 00:14:43,229 Uh, you really don't want to get caught lying to Joyce. 405 00:14:43,230 --> 00:14:45,318 Uh, just ask Theresa. 406 00:14:45,319 --> 00:14:47,102 But you'd have to ask her at 3:00 in the morning, 407 00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:49,670 'cause that's when her shift starts now. 408 00:14:49,671 --> 00:14:51,063 I hear a lot of people saying 409 00:14:51,064 --> 00:14:53,108 that our health-care system is broken, 410 00:14:53,109 --> 00:14:55,719 but it seems pretty great, if you ask me. 411 00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:58,113 Nobody even mentions the brownies. 412 00:14:58,114 --> 00:15:00,028 "If the pipes are on the older side, 413 00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:04,293 then epoxy putty may be used to repair any corroded seals." 414 00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:05,381 Interesting. 415 00:15:05,382 --> 00:15:06,513 But that's not gonna work 416 00:15:06,514 --> 00:15:08,210 if you're dealing with a faulty flange. 417 00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,733 Try not moving around, please. 418 00:15:09,734 --> 00:15:11,126 You've got a real bee in your bonnet 419 00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:12,649 about this flange theory. 420 00:15:12,650 --> 00:15:13,999 I'm not married to the flange. 421 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,609 Maybe it's a press fitting. - Ooh! 422 00:15:15,610 --> 00:15:19,308 Ooh, ooh, did we try swapping out the O-ring? 423 00:15:19,309 --> 00:15:21,093 - We're about to. - Jackpot. 424 00:15:21,094 --> 00:15:23,095 Dakota, can you come in here and finish this off? 425 00:15:23,096 --> 00:15:26,141 She's much better than me anyway. 426 00:15:26,142 --> 00:15:28,665 Dakota. Dakota! 427 00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:29,971 So we knock out this wall, 428 00:15:29,972 --> 00:15:32,191 then the whole thing becomes a courtyard-- 429 00:15:32,192 --> 00:15:34,193 topiaries, a koi pond. 430 00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:36,499 I'm imagining your name on a fountain. 431 00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:38,501 I'm imagining your name on it. 432 00:15:38,502 --> 00:15:40,155 Wow. 433 00:15:40,156 --> 00:15:42,766 How generous is this woman? - Oh. 434 00:15:42,767 --> 00:15:44,594 Is it okay if I use the ladies' room? 435 00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:45,769 Oh, sure. You know what? 436 00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:46,988 Use the one in our staff room. 437 00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:48,381 The other one's for the riff-raff. 438 00:15:48,382 --> 00:15:50,252 It's disgusting. - Oh. 439 00:15:50,253 --> 00:15:51,471 Thank you. - Scoot. 440 00:15:53,256 --> 00:15:56,693 Joyce, come on, a koi pond? 441 00:15:56,694 --> 00:15:59,348 It's Japanese for "fish." 442 00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:02,525 I'm saying that if we were to get a large donation, 443 00:16:02,526 --> 00:16:05,833 we should probably use that money to buy new Alaris pumps 444 00:16:05,834 --> 00:16:07,487 or hire more patient techs. 445 00:16:07,488 --> 00:16:09,271 Yeah, I love that. I love that idea. 446 00:16:09,272 --> 00:16:11,795 But I'm saying, lure people in with the koi pond, 447 00:16:11,796 --> 00:16:14,146 become a health-care destination, 448 00:16:14,147 --> 00:16:15,799 and then we can hire an infinite number 449 00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:17,366 of patient techs. 450 00:16:17,367 --> 00:16:19,368 Oh, look at us jammin'. 451 00:16:19,369 --> 00:16:20,587 We're jammin'. 452 00:16:22,068 --> 00:16:24,243 A koi pond? That's what we need? 453 00:16:24,244 --> 00:16:26,159 People here are burning themselves out just to-- 454 00:16:28,074 --> 00:16:31,032 Sorry, I just remembered that this is imaginary money, so... 455 00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:36,820 Hmm... 456 00:16:36,821 --> 00:16:40,041 - Is everything okay? - Oh, yeah, totally. 457 00:16:40,042 --> 00:16:41,956 Just seeing here that you haven't had 458 00:16:41,957 --> 00:16:44,915 a colonoscopy since... ever. 459 00:16:44,916 --> 00:16:46,656 That can't be right, can it? 460 00:16:46,657 --> 00:16:49,398 Yeah, but I thought you don't need that until you're 45. 461 00:16:49,399 --> 00:16:50,747 I'm 37. 462 00:16:50,748 --> 00:16:52,097 Yeah, sure, they say 45, 463 00:16:52,098 --> 00:16:54,273 but they also say you should get your oil changed 464 00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:56,840 every 10,000 miles, when-- I mean, we all know it's 5,000. 465 00:16:56,841 --> 00:16:58,886 5,000, yeah. 466 00:16:58,887 --> 00:17:01,410 Then, one day, bam, your engine's shot. 467 00:17:01,411 --> 00:17:03,499 Turns out, they were wrong. 468 00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:05,372 Yeah, I'll think about it. 469 00:17:09,245 --> 00:17:11,551 Oh, Gary. 470 00:17:11,552 --> 00:17:13,814 Gary, Gary, Gary. 471 00:17:13,815 --> 00:17:16,817 Either there is cancer in your colon right now 472 00:17:16,818 --> 00:17:20,081 waiting to attack the rest of your body, or... 473 00:17:20,082 --> 00:17:21,822 there isn't. 474 00:17:21,823 --> 00:17:23,998 And if you're willing to wait eight years 475 00:17:23,999 --> 00:17:27,175 to find out which it is, it's brave. 476 00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:29,960 I guess I could schedule something. 477 00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:31,179 - Yes! - Yes! 478 00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:32,876 Let's go. 479 00:17:32,877 --> 00:17:36,880 Sorry, just excited to keep your colon healthy. 480 00:17:36,881 --> 00:17:39,796 - Matt, super-good liar. - It's kind of fun. 481 00:17:39,797 --> 00:17:41,320 The key is, as you're lying, 482 00:17:41,321 --> 00:17:43,409 you clench your butt together super hard, 483 00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:44,845 to the point where it hurts, 484 00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:47,630 and that keeps your mind off the guilty feeling. 485 00:17:47,631 --> 00:17:49,764 Hey, whatever gets you there. 486 00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:54,289 I really thought this would be a number-one situation. 487 00:18:01,645 --> 00:18:03,733 What are you two doing? 488 00:18:03,734 --> 00:18:06,606 I have a very important VIP coming through here. 489 00:18:06,607 --> 00:18:07,868 I cannot have my doctors 490 00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:09,696 ripping into the walls like lunatics. 491 00:18:09,697 --> 00:18:10,827 No, no, no, no, no, Joyce, come on. 492 00:18:10,828 --> 00:18:12,002 We're right at the one-yard line 493 00:18:12,003 --> 00:18:13,526 with this thing, really, and I'm sorry. 494 00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:14,962 Are you talking about her? 495 00:18:14,963 --> 00:18:16,877 That's not a VIP. I've treated her before. 496 00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:18,618 That's just--I don't know-- some lady. 497 00:18:18,619 --> 00:18:19,706 What? 498 00:18:19,707 --> 00:18:22,622 Yeah, what? 499 00:18:22,623 --> 00:18:24,493 Just some lady? 500 00:18:24,494 --> 00:18:26,365 She's just some--some lady? 501 00:18:26,366 --> 00:18:29,803 Are we all just some ladies to you, Bruce, huh? 502 00:18:29,804 --> 00:18:31,848 I don't think Eleanor Roosevelt would like that. 503 00:18:31,849 --> 00:18:33,850 - Okay. Okay. - Yeah. And you know what? 504 00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:36,026 Every patient matters, all right? 505 00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:38,116 And shouldn't just be kicked to the curb. 506 00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,682 Right. Right. 507 00:18:39,683 --> 00:18:42,555 But especially Ms. Dusseldorf, 508 00:18:42,556 --> 00:18:44,905 who is filthy rich and is going to build us 509 00:18:44,906 --> 00:18:47,342 a Japanese koi pond for our new courtyard. 510 00:18:47,343 --> 00:18:48,778 Exactly. 511 00:18:48,779 --> 00:18:50,824 Now make this stuff go away before you blow it. 512 00:18:50,825 --> 00:18:53,087 - Yeah. - Dusseldorf? 513 00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:55,307 You try making up a last name that sounds real! 514 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:01,574 - Bang! - We won! 515 00:19:01,575 --> 00:19:03,228 What about Paige and Dakota? 516 00:19:03,229 --> 00:19:05,099 They didn't even check people's coverage. 517 00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:07,884 Almost every procedure got rejected by insurance. 518 00:19:07,885 --> 00:19:09,277 That's amazing. 519 00:19:09,278 --> 00:19:11,888 I mean, you know, very bleak on a society level, 520 00:19:11,889 --> 00:19:14,064 but really good in this one instance. 521 00:19:14,065 --> 00:19:16,023 So are you gonna go to the show? 522 00:19:16,024 --> 00:19:17,155 Of course, yeah. What do you mean? 523 00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,634 Hey, Gavin. 524 00:19:18,635 --> 00:19:20,593 I sold mine to Gavin from the lab 525 00:19:20,594 --> 00:19:22,638 for 200 bucks--way over face. 526 00:19:22,639 --> 00:19:24,684 Here you go, boy. 527 00:19:24,685 --> 00:19:26,207 This my date? 528 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,905 Uh, I guess so. 529 00:19:28,906 --> 00:19:30,385 You guys are gonna have the best time. 530 00:19:30,386 --> 00:19:32,214 Tell me how it is. 531 00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:35,521 So you want to drive and I drink, 532 00:19:35,522 --> 00:19:38,350 or do you want me to drive and just roll the dice? 533 00:19:38,351 --> 00:19:40,917 Oh. 534 00:19:40,918 --> 00:19:42,484 Well, Plumber Jordan would be proud. 535 00:19:43,965 --> 00:19:45,748 - I fixed a leak today! - Oh, yeah. 536 00:19:45,749 --> 00:19:46,880 And not some run-of-the-mill, 537 00:19:46,881 --> 00:19:48,403 "just swapped out the O-ring" leak. 538 00:19:48,404 --> 00:19:49,709 Give me a break. 539 00:19:49,710 --> 00:19:51,145 This is a leak's leak, you know, 540 00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:52,668 the kind you tell your grandkids about. 541 00:19:52,669 --> 00:19:53,930 Oh, yeah. 542 00:19:53,931 --> 00:19:55,628 I also reset a broken neck 543 00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:57,760 and took a battery out of a kid's esophagus. 544 00:19:57,761 --> 00:19:59,327 - Sure. - But... 545 00:19:59,328 --> 00:20:01,373 I fixed a leak... 546 00:20:02,766 --> 00:20:05,986 In the wall! - There you go. 547 00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:08,249 I'm gonna have to get a whole crew in here tomorrow. 548 00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:10,425 They Mickey Moused the whole thing. 549 00:20:10,426 --> 00:20:12,340 Who told them to do this? 550 00:20:12,341 --> 00:20:14,038 It's no good. 551 00:20:15,605 --> 00:20:17,824 This was wonderful. 552 00:20:17,825 --> 00:20:21,784 Oh, you guys have the most amazing hospital. 553 00:20:21,785 --> 00:20:23,438 Well, thank you. 554 00:20:23,439 --> 00:20:26,267 We--we really do have a lot of good stuff going on here, 555 00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:28,617 but, um, we could do so much more 556 00:20:28,618 --> 00:20:30,619 if only we had the money. 557 00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:33,579 You have to have the money. 558 00:20:33,580 --> 00:20:36,146 Yes, exactly. 559 00:20:36,147 --> 00:20:39,889 Um, do you--do you think we'll get it? 560 00:20:39,890 --> 00:20:41,674 I really do. 561 00:20:41,675 --> 00:20:42,849 I know you'll get it. 562 00:20:42,850 --> 00:20:44,416 You'll get the money. 563 00:20:46,462 --> 00:20:48,420 You just made my day with that. 564 00:20:48,421 --> 00:20:49,682 Oh! 565 00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:52,250 The truly wealthy are a complex breed-- 566 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:56,863 uh, refined yet eccentric, discriminating yet fickle. 567 00:20:56,864 --> 00:20:59,822 Extracting their money is a delicate art, 568 00:20:59,823 --> 00:21:02,912 but I have been known to... 569 00:21:02,913 --> 00:21:05,915 Pick a pocket or two... 570 00:21:05,916 --> 00:21:09,267 right, guv'na? 571 00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:11,051 Am I--am I the gu--oh. 572 00:21:11,052 --> 00:21:14,184 Uh, you got that right, Joyce. 573 00:21:14,185 --> 00:21:16,012 Just use your normal voice. 574 00:21:16,013 --> 00:21:17,666 Okay. Um... 575 00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:21,017 uh, Joyce did a really good job today. 576 00:21:21,018 --> 00:21:22,758 Hello, hello.