1
00:00:01,169 --> 00:00:02,503
[ Alarm Beeping ]

2
00:00:02,570 --> 00:00:04,438
[ Earl Narrating ]
Me and Randy don't usually
set the alarm,

3
00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:07,841
but today was
our first day of work.

4
00:00:07,908 --> 00:00:11,845
Rise and shine.
Hands off... mine!
Randy, hands off mine!

5
00:00:11,912 --> 00:00:14,282
[ Earl Narrating ]
Recently I added
somethin' to my list.

6
00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:17,785
Number 273-- kept myself
from bein' an adult.

7
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:20,521
[ Earl Narrating ]
First thing I did
was get a G.E.D.,

8
00:00:20,588 --> 00:00:22,990
and the next step
was findin' a job.

9
00:00:23,057 --> 00:00:25,193
Turns out it was easy
to find a job.

10
00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:27,561
The hard part was findin' one
we'd want to keep.

11
00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:31,099
Well, the crane's broken.
Guess we're usin' the saw.

12
00:00:33,067 --> 00:00:35,436
[ Motor Revving ]
[ Groans ]

13
00:00:35,503 --> 00:00:38,272
[ Earl Narrating ]
But today was lookin'
a little more promising.

14
00:00:38,339 --> 00:00:41,309
Man, these things smell clean,
but they're a little bit itchy.

15
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:44,145
I wish I would've
left my underwear on.

16
00:00:44,212 --> 00:00:47,448
Nice! Wear those colors
with pride.

17
00:00:47,515 --> 00:00:50,351
You last a month,
we sew on a name tag.

18
00:00:50,418 --> 00:00:52,986
Make it a year,
they're yours to keep.

19
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:56,090
And before
we unload a truck,

20
00:00:56,157 --> 00:00:59,393
for good luck,
everybody rubs
my mother's bust.

21
00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:06,066
Lewis,
go in the back.

22
00:01:06,134 --> 00:01:08,202
Hey, Reggie.

23
00:01:08,269 --> 00:01:11,272
These are the new guys,
Earl and Randy.

24
00:01:11,339 --> 00:01:14,508
Show 'em the ropes.
Will do, Mr. Waadt.

25
00:01:15,943 --> 00:01:19,580
Well, all right.
Trucks come in and out
of here all day long.

26
00:01:19,647 --> 00:01:22,316
Truck comes in, you unload it.
Truck goes out, you load it.

27
00:01:22,383 --> 00:01:24,452
Next truck comes in,
you unload it.
Next truck--

28
00:01:24,518 --> 00:01:27,621
Wait a second. Go back
to that first truck.
I think we got it.

29
00:01:27,688 --> 00:01:30,158
My name is Earl.

30
00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:35,763
[ Earl Narrating ]
Havin' a job isn't the most
glamorous way to spend your day,

31
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:38,232
but it felt good bein'
a part of the workforce.

32
00:01:38,299 --> 00:01:40,401
Me and Randy
were real nine-to-fivers.

33
00:01:40,468 --> 00:01:43,137
Hey, Earl. Someone said
Wednesday is "Hump Day."

34
00:01:43,204 --> 00:01:47,308
I haven't seen any ladies here,
so I'll watch your back
and you watch mine.

35
00:01:49,343 --> 00:01:53,113
[ Earl Narrating ] And while
me and Randy were learnin' about
the realities of grown-up life,

36
00:01:53,181 --> 00:01:55,783
Joy was gettin' her own
little dose of reality.

37
00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:57,685
Hey, look who it is!

38
00:01:57,751 --> 00:02:01,189
It's my deaf lawyer's
word talker. What up, Doug?

39
00:02:01,255 --> 00:02:04,392
You are such a sweet son,
takin' your mama out shoppin'
and all.

40
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:08,362
Yeah, she's my wife.
Um, I'll meet you inside?

41
00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,700
Yuck.

42
00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:15,569
I'm sorry. It's just
she's so damn old.

43
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:18,539
Well, that certainly
is a lot of punch.

44
00:02:18,606 --> 00:02:21,642
Is someone
at the trailer park
gettin' baptized?

45
00:02:21,709 --> 00:02:23,844
No, it's for me.
They're havin' a sale.

46
00:02:23,911 --> 00:02:26,347
I love the green stuff.
Darnell won't touch it.

47
00:02:26,414 --> 00:02:29,183
I like the orange.
Green gives me the hiccups.

48
00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:33,354
All that's for you?
You do realize your trial
starts next week, right?

49
00:02:33,421 --> 00:02:35,889
Not much of a trial.
I mean, my witness is dead.

50
00:02:35,956 --> 00:02:39,327
They have other evidence, Joy.
This trial could go either way.

51
00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:42,230
You have to prepare
yourself for that.

52
00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:44,865
I don't know if I would
be buying that much punch.

53
00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:52,139
Want me to go get your
money back for the punch?
I can't!

54
00:02:52,206 --> 00:02:55,376
I already spit my gum into
the receipt, just like I did
with the entertainment unit,

55
00:02:55,443 --> 00:02:58,979
which forced me to steal
the truck and is the reason why
I'm facing life in prison.

56
00:02:59,046 --> 00:03:02,250
Swear to God,
if Fruit Stripe just kept its
damn flavor a little longer,

57
00:03:02,316 --> 00:03:04,385
I wouldn't
be in this mess.

58
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:09,757
[ Earl Narrating ] Me and Randy
quickly learned that our new job
came with perks.

59
00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:13,160
They give you
a store credit card,
a week's vacation,

60
00:03:13,227 --> 00:03:17,398
and anything
you put in your 401(k),
the company will match it.

61
00:03:17,465 --> 00:03:19,600
I'm gonna put a puppy
in mine.

62
00:03:19,667 --> 00:03:22,303
[ Earl Narrating ]
And twice a day,
we got to spend 15 minutes...

63
00:03:22,370 --> 00:03:25,373
eatin' food out
of the snack machines.

64
00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:27,408
We're the perfect
cookie-eatin' team.

65
00:03:27,475 --> 00:03:29,577
We used to be good
with gum too.

66
00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:31,979
When we were kids,
Earl'd soften it up,
and I'd blow the bubbles.

67
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,949
Hey, guys, A-9's empty.
I wonder what they're
gonna put in there.

68
00:03:36,016 --> 00:03:38,719
Well, I hope they don't waste
valuable real estate
with stamps again.

69
00:03:38,786 --> 00:03:42,690
Or that Arm and Hammer stuff. Mom
always had that in the fridge,
and it was a terrible snack.

70
00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:45,259
No matter how much you eat,
it doesn't fill you up.

71
00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:48,028
[ Earl Narrating ]
After four hours of box foldin'
and talkin' snacks,

72
00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:49,963
I was gettin' a little bored.

73
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:53,734
You know, one time
I pushed D-5, and two bags
of chips came out.

74
00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:56,637
But then
one time I pushed it,
and no chips came out.

75
00:03:56,704 --> 00:04:00,173
Maybe I should switch the order
of that story, you know,
so it has a happy ending.

76
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,477
[ Earl Narrating ]
I couldn't imagine doin' a job
I'd mastered on my first day...

77
00:04:03,544 --> 00:04:05,646
for the rest of my life.

78
00:04:05,713 --> 00:04:08,616
- That's when I got the call.
- Hey, you!

79
00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:12,252
We need a new floor model.
Bring that dishwasher up front.

80
00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:16,189
[ Earl Narrating ]
It was my first time
on the sales floor,

81
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:18,926
and I had no idea
that through those
plastic curtains...

82
00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:21,729
was a paradise more beautiful
than I'd ever imagined.

83
00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:24,598
They had air conditioning that
felt like Frosty the Snowman...

84
00:04:24,665 --> 00:04:27,535
was blowin' kisses
up my coveralls.

85
00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:33,507
Even the way it smelled
was better than the back.

86
00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:37,678
Where we had B.O.,
they had cinnamon buns.
Oh, wow!

87
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:40,714
* When I die
and they lay me to rest *

88
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:43,351
* Gonna go to the place
that's the best *

89
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:46,320
[ Earl Narrating ]
And the guys who worked in there
seemed to have it all--

90
00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:50,391
the looks, the charm
and the kind of straight teeth
you can only get from braces.

91
00:04:50,458 --> 00:04:52,993
* Spirit in the sky **

92
00:04:53,060 --> 00:04:55,596
And just like the first time
I drank chocolate milk...

93
00:04:55,663 --> 00:04:58,198
and realized I wanted to
live my life with a mustache,

94
00:04:58,265 --> 00:05:00,167
I knew I wanted to work
in the front.

95
00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:03,804
Hey, guys, how does someone
get a job in the showroom?

96
00:05:03,871 --> 00:05:08,008
As a salesman?
Well, first, you get one
of those braided belts.

97
00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:10,678
Then you put
too much hair gel in,
which is good...

98
00:05:10,744 --> 00:05:14,382
'cause it makes it easier
to shove your head
up your own rump.

99
00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:16,650
And where would I get one
of these braided belts?

100
00:05:16,717 --> 00:05:20,554
- Are you really thinking
you could work up there?
- Maybe.

101
00:05:20,621 --> 00:05:22,590
Let me set you straight
about something right now.

102
00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:24,992
No one's ever moved
from the back to the front.

103
00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:26,727
Yeah, but--
But nothin'.

104
00:05:26,794 --> 00:05:29,062
Now, I know
you got your G.E.D.,

105
00:05:29,129 --> 00:05:31,665
and you think
the world's gonna be
your little oyster,

106
00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:34,368
but those guys out there,

107
00:05:34,435 --> 00:05:36,704
they went to junior college.

108
00:05:36,770 --> 00:05:40,608
South Nathanville
Junior College.

109
00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:44,244
That's the Harvard
of Camden-area
junior colleges.

110
00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:46,246
Overeducated
bastards.

111
00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:50,851
You know what they call us?
Dockers, because we work
on the loading dock.

112
00:05:50,918 --> 00:05:54,287
You know what
the ironical part is?
They actually wear Dockers.

113
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,991
We wear Dickies,
which, by the way,
is what we call them.

114
00:05:58,058 --> 00:06:02,496
In a perfect world
we'd switch pants, but Dockers
doesn't make a coverall.

115
00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:06,600
Yeah, they're
exclusively slacks.
We called.

116
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:10,370
You're not
a front room guy, Hickey.
You're one of us.

117
00:06:11,539 --> 00:06:14,575
There's nothin' wrong
with bein' a Docker.

118
00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:17,911
[ Truck Beeping ]

119
00:06:19,780 --> 00:06:22,616
Man, it sure
smelled good in there.

120
00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:33,961
[ Earl Narrating ] Realizin'
she might actually go to prison,
Joy started to prepare.

121
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:36,797
First she had a yard sale
so the family would have money.

122
00:06:36,864 --> 00:06:41,234
Thank you for your business!
Hey, Darnell, guess what.

123
00:06:41,301 --> 00:06:43,236
What?
[ Grunts ]

124
00:06:43,303 --> 00:06:45,238
I sold the porch.

125
00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:47,775
[ Earl Narrating ]
Then she prepared for gettin'
along with the inmates.

126
00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:52,212
I'm gonna need you to teach me
how to speak Mexican so I can
talk to Latina gangs in prison.

127
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:55,649
'Cause, I mean, I already
know how to speak black,
and I'm not afraid of Asians.

128
00:06:55,716 --> 00:06:58,085
Sure. Just walk up
to the biggest lady
you can find...

129
00:06:58,151 --> 00:07:02,456
and say, "Buenos días.
Estoy aquí para
ser tu perra."

130
00:07:02,523 --> 00:07:05,759
I heard "bitch" in there.
I mean, I'm not stupid.

131
00:07:05,826 --> 00:07:08,328
I've been called "bitch"
in every single language
there is.

132
00:07:08,395 --> 00:07:11,064
God, nice try, beeyotch.
That's black.

133
00:07:12,633 --> 00:07:14,434
[ Earl Narrating ]
And finally,
she sold the Brat...

134
00:07:14,502 --> 00:07:18,138
so Darnell would have
the right transportation
while she was away.

135
00:07:18,205 --> 00:07:20,741
But you love that car.
I know.

136
00:07:20,808 --> 00:07:23,644
But you gotta take the highway
to come and visit me in prison.

137
00:07:23,711 --> 00:07:26,780
The Brat gets the shimmies
when you hit 35.

138
00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:38,926
- Now, this is
a very popular model.
- Yes, but is it reliable?

139
00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:41,895
Oh, yeah. My mom's
had that kind of dryer
for over 20 years.

140
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:43,964
And I happen to know
from experience,

141
00:07:44,031 --> 00:07:47,935
you can put a neighbor kid in
every day for most of the year,
and it'll still run good as new.

142
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:51,471
- I'll take it.
- Well, let me get you
a salesman.

143
00:07:51,539 --> 00:07:53,641
Hey, Brandon?

144
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:58,779
You're good with people, Hickey.
You're kind of like
a people person.

145
00:07:58,846 --> 00:08:03,183
Thanks. You know, uh, I've
been thinkin' of talkin' to you
about becomin' a salesman.

146
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:07,821
You don't become a salesman.
You're born a salesman.

147
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:11,592
Except for those people
who learn how to be a salesman.

148
00:08:11,659 --> 00:08:14,027
Truth is, most people
do it that way.

149
00:08:14,094 --> 00:08:15,696
I'll tell you what.

150
00:08:15,763 --> 00:08:19,600
If you show me that you
want it bad enough,

151
00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:21,669
I'll think about
bringin' you up front.

152
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:25,839
Yes.

153
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:29,877
Look. They filled A-9
with popcorn.

154
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:32,245
What are we gonna
talk about now?

155
00:08:32,312 --> 00:08:34,715
B-7's almost empty.

156
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:40,187
Hey, rookie!

157
00:08:40,253 --> 00:08:42,990
Anyone ever teach you
the right way to use a broom?

158
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:49,529
You take the handle,
put it at a 45-degree angle,

159
00:08:49,597 --> 00:08:53,100
lean it against the wall
then sit your ass down
and eat some lunch.

160
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:55,736
[ Laughing ]

161
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,810
You got hair gel in here?

162
00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:05,412
You're still thinkin' about
workin' in the showroom?

163
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:07,815
Didn't you hear
a damn word I said?

164
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,383
Front room and back room
don't mix.

165
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:12,620
Hey, come on.
We're all just people.

166
00:09:12,686 --> 00:09:14,622
They're not people.
They're Dickies.

167
00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:18,191
Dickies who think you're dumber
than they are just because
they're smarter than you.

168
00:09:18,258 --> 00:09:19,927
I hate that.

169
00:09:19,993 --> 00:09:22,930
I wouldn't be like that
if I worked out front.

170
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:26,399
I'm not smarter than anybody.
I'm a regular dude.

171
00:09:26,466 --> 00:09:28,902
If you were a regular dude,

172
00:09:28,969 --> 00:09:31,038
you'd be staying back here.

173
00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:34,742
Ooh, look at me.
I'm Mr. Get Ahead.

174
00:09:34,808 --> 00:09:37,577
I want to
take a shower every day
and wear a tie.

175
00:09:37,645 --> 00:09:40,247
- A tie!
- Enough!

176
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:44,084
My whole life I've been
thinkin' like that-- makin' fun
of kids who studied.

177
00:09:44,151 --> 00:09:47,821
Thinkin' that guys who worked
to get ahead were jerks.

178
00:09:47,888 --> 00:09:50,557
But you know what?
Maybe I was wrong.

179
00:09:50,624 --> 00:09:54,695
'Cause in over 30 years,
it sure hasn't
gotten me anyplace.

180
00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:57,130
Give it up, son.
You'll never be one of them.

181
00:09:57,197 --> 00:10:00,200
And once you try,
you'll never be one of us.

182
00:10:04,772 --> 00:10:07,307
I got sweepin' to do.

183
00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:25,693
Don't be mad.
I just want to fit in
with the guys.

184
00:10:34,334 --> 00:10:37,237
[ Earl Narrating ]
While my hard work wasn't
impressin' my coworkers,

185
00:10:38,906 --> 00:10:41,441
they weren't the ones
I was tryin' to impress.

186
00:10:41,508 --> 00:10:43,410
[ Motor Running ]

187
00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:53,286
Hickey, we don't
open for two hours.
How'd you get in here?

188
00:10:53,353 --> 00:10:56,824
Through an air duct.
But don't worry.
I sealed it back up.

189
00:10:56,890 --> 00:11:00,761
What about the alarm?
Disabled. Re-abled.

190
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,502
[ Earl Narrating ]
I wasn't just provin'
I was a hard worker.

191
00:11:09,569 --> 00:11:13,406
I was preparin',
in case Mr. Waadt
gave me a shot.

192
00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:15,408
Toaster oven.

193
00:11:15,475 --> 00:11:19,780
Model DV-2301.

194
00:11:19,847 --> 00:11:23,050
Thirty-minute timer.
Removable crumb tray.

195
00:11:24,885 --> 00:11:27,020
Who's on fire?

196
00:11:37,564 --> 00:11:39,733
Well, I got the dent out.

197
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:43,036
Nice work. We can
sell that full price.

198
00:11:44,337 --> 00:11:46,907
[ Chuckling ]

199
00:11:46,974 --> 00:11:49,076
Have you seen my foot?

200
00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:52,780
Oh! There it is.

201
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,218
[ Earl Narrating ]
And then it happened.

202
00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:05,826
I'm giving you
your shot, kid.
You earned it.

203
00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:08,829
Thank you, sir.
You won't regret this.

204
00:12:08,896 --> 00:12:10,864
But it's just a trial.

205
00:12:10,931 --> 00:12:12,766
If you want
to stay out there,

206
00:12:12,833 --> 00:12:16,569
I need to see five grand
in sales by the end
of the day Sunday.

207
00:12:16,636 --> 00:12:18,605
I promise I won't
let you down, sir.

208
00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:21,341
I can do anything
I put my mind to.

209
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:24,277
Could you tie this for me
so I can slip it on
every morning?

210
00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:28,481
I don't tie ties,
and I don't listen
to excuses.

211
00:12:28,548 --> 00:12:30,450
Five grand, Hickey.

212
00:12:32,152 --> 00:12:34,654
See me
when you get there.
[ Laughs ]

213
00:12:34,721 --> 00:12:36,824
I did it.

214
00:12:41,528 --> 00:12:43,363
Good luck.
I'm proud of you.

215
00:12:44,798 --> 00:12:47,868
[ Spits ]

216
00:12:51,038 --> 00:12:54,141
Keep 'em closed.
I got you somethin'.

217
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:56,977
See, if I go away to prison,
you're gonna want
some companionship.

218
00:12:57,044 --> 00:13:00,247
Plus, I don't
want you to go cheatin',
so... open up.

219
00:13:02,349 --> 00:13:05,819
- Oh, my God.
- I found one that looks
just like me.

220
00:13:05,886 --> 00:13:10,057
She takes two triple-A
batteries, and you can get 'em
outta Dodge's Lite-Brite.

221
00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:12,392
[ Inhales, Exhales ]
Check that out.

222
00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:15,595
She's even got
that new car smell.
I know how you like that.

223
00:13:15,662 --> 00:13:17,564
I do like that smell.

224
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:20,467
I also like the smell
of bacon, but I'm not
going to fornicate it.

225
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:24,071
Oh, come on. It says right here
if you soak her in a hot tub
for 10 minutes,

226
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:26,806
she feels
even more lifelike.

227
00:13:28,375 --> 00:13:31,544
You can even pop her head off
and nuke it in the microwave!

228
00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:43,991
Hey, guys. I'm Earl.

229
00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:47,460
This is great, huh?
Livin' the dream.

230
00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:50,463
Livin' the dream!

231
00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:56,703
Did I have it
tied wrong?

232
00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:58,671
Everything about you
being here is wrong.

233
00:13:58,738 --> 00:14:01,074
I didn't take
Intro to Beginning Statistics
twice at junior college...

234
00:14:01,141 --> 00:14:03,243
to work
with some Docker.

235
00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:06,246
We're gonna make sure
that you don't sell
five grand by Sunday.

236
00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:09,482
And if you think
we're kiddin',

237
00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:11,451
we're not.

238
00:14:13,753 --> 00:14:16,957
[ Earl ] In my younger days,
I would've either stabbed him
with the scissors...

239
00:14:17,024 --> 00:14:19,026
or strangled him
with the tie.

240
00:14:19,092 --> 00:14:21,328
But not this time.
I was an adult now.

241
00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:23,830
And I was gonna prove
to everyone I could do it.

242
00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:27,200
They could cut my tie,
but they couldn't
cut out my heart.

243
00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:33,907
The nice thing
about this model is it's
a pain in the ass to steal.

244
00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:36,476
See, it's got these
triangle-shaped lock nuts.

245
00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:39,947
Try to unhook it in the dark
with a regular wrench,
you get a scar like this.

246
00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:43,816
Hey, Earl, have you told her
the amortized value?

247
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,186
[ Woman ]
Mmm.
"Amoritized."

248
00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:48,421
Uh--

249
00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:53,593
* When the moon hits your eye
like a big pizza pie *

250
00:14:53,660 --> 00:14:56,796
* That's "amoritized" **

251
00:14:56,863 --> 00:14:59,232
You better let me help you
with this one.

252
00:14:59,299 --> 00:15:03,103
You have to excuse him.
He didn't go to junior college.

253
00:15:03,170 --> 00:15:07,407
I like your cologne.
Yeah. I know you do.

254
00:15:07,474 --> 00:15:11,011
[ Chuckling ]
[ Woman On P.A. ]
Jim, you got a call on line 2.

255
00:15:16,049 --> 00:15:19,152
[ Earl Narrating ]
The next day, I came back
with a can-do attitude...

256
00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:21,421
and a tie Randy bought
back in the '80s.

257
00:15:21,488 --> 00:15:24,457
It took some time,
but I finally made
my first sale.

258
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,693
I don't know
if I mentioned this, but
the microwave you bought...

259
00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:30,964
has a tray that spins around
so your food doesn't
get tired of the view.

260
00:15:31,031 --> 00:15:35,235
Hey, Earl, those
pretty desert ladies with
the long boobies are right.

261
00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:38,205
It is easier to carry
somethin' on your head.

262
00:15:39,739 --> 00:15:42,809
Damn it, Randy! That was
the last one in stock.

263
00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:47,214
How freakin' hard is it to
carry a box without pretendin'
you're an African lady?

264
00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:50,883
Billy was right
about front room guys.

265
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:54,621
You are a Dickie.

266
00:15:54,687 --> 00:15:59,059
[ Earl Narrating ] I hated
snappin' at Randy, but stress
makes you do crazy things,

267
00:15:59,126 --> 00:16:02,029
as Darnell would find out
the next day.

268
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:08,601
Good morning, baby.

269
00:16:11,404 --> 00:16:14,241
Can I interest you
in a little lovemaking?

270
00:16:15,108 --> 00:16:17,177
[ Sniffs ]

271
00:16:23,016 --> 00:16:24,951
[ Screaming ]

272
00:16:25,018 --> 00:16:29,089
[ Earl Narrating ]
He was shocked, but he had
a bigger shock comin'.

273
00:16:31,024 --> 00:16:33,960
Joy was gone.

274
00:16:34,027 --> 00:16:37,530
Well, baby, by now you're
probably figurin' out
what I've done.

275
00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:40,600
[ Earl Narrating ]
What Joy had done was
pull off a master plan.

276
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:46,473
That sex doll she bought
was just a diversion
to help her buy some time.

277
00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:53,180
And the reason Joy traded in
the Brat was 'cause she needed
a car with a comfortable trunk.

278
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:59,419
Hey! Drive careful.
Every bump you hit knocks
a point off this baby's I.Q.

279
00:16:59,486 --> 00:17:03,390
* I got to run
to keep from hiding *

280
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:06,559
[ Earl Narrating ]
And prison wasn't the place Joy
was gonna be speaking Spanish.

281
00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:08,928
[ Animal Howling ]
* Keep on riding **

282
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:11,498
So "snap" is chasquido.

283
00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:15,368
Oh, chasquido.
That'll work.

284
00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:18,738
I knew if I told you I was
running, you'd just stop me
because you worry so much.

285
00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:21,874
But I'll send
for you and the kids
just as soon as I can.

286
00:17:21,941 --> 00:17:24,344
I'm just scared, Darnell.
I'm sorry.

287
00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:27,480
Please don't be mad.
Please, please, please.

288
00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:29,382
I love you.

289
00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:41,261
Go, baby. Go.

290
00:17:41,328 --> 00:17:43,630
[ Earl Narrating ]
The Sunday shift
was almost over,

291
00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:47,600
and I was so far away
from my sales goal that I was
willin' to try anything.

292
00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:52,239
[ Door Closes ]
Oh, hi.
I need to buy, um--

293
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:54,874
Okay, hold on.
I have it written down.

294
00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:56,809
Uh--

295
00:17:58,245 --> 00:18:01,047
There we are.
Oh, that's not it.

296
00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:05,218
That's the coupon.
Five dollars off.

297
00:18:05,285 --> 00:18:08,521
Hey, Docker.
This big spender's
all yours.

298
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:11,291
Just make sure not to count
the coupon in your total.

299
00:18:11,358 --> 00:18:13,460
[ Chuckles ]
Here's my list.

300
00:18:13,526 --> 00:18:17,464
We're remodeling
our church's soup kitchen.

301
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:20,267
I'm going to need
three refrigerators,

302
00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:23,970
two stoves
and two dishwashers.

303
00:18:24,036 --> 00:18:26,906
I hope this
isn't too much.

304
00:18:26,973 --> 00:18:30,109
[ Wheezing Laugh ]
Oh!

305
00:18:30,177 --> 00:18:32,445
You're an angel in
a tiny, wrinkled package.

306
00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:37,784
Reggie! This woman
just bought a ton of stuff
for her church.

307
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:40,320
She needs it loaded
in that truck out front.

308
00:18:40,387 --> 00:18:43,122
Most of these are still
out on the semi.

309
00:18:43,190 --> 00:18:44,991
Can we get somebody
workin' on it?

310
00:18:45,057 --> 00:18:49,929
It's rainin'.
We don't unload when
it's rainin', Dickie.

311
00:18:49,996 --> 00:18:52,199
- Dickie!
- Look, please, guys.

312
00:18:52,265 --> 00:18:55,635
I've only got 30 minutes
to complete this sale,
or it doesn't count.

313
00:18:57,737 --> 00:19:00,139
Randy?

314
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:03,643
Fine.

315
00:19:29,402 --> 00:19:32,839
Well, I'll be
a son of a bitch.

316
00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:36,543
I've never seen a Dickie
pull his own stock before.

317
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:39,912
Kid's got guts.
He could slip and fall.

318
00:19:49,922 --> 00:19:53,626
[ Ferocious Shout ]

319
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:59,932
Well, you're
all packed up, ma'am.
Just sign here.

320
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:02,034
Oh, hi.

321
00:20:02,101 --> 00:20:05,238
I switched my sale
over to Rick.

322
00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:08,908
What?
Turns out we go
to the same church.

323
00:20:08,975 --> 00:20:11,411
And this sweet
young man...

324
00:20:11,478 --> 00:20:14,647
promised he'll give
half his commission
to the church.

325
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:17,884
I'll see you at church
on Sunday.

326
00:20:17,950 --> 00:20:20,219
I'll see you there.

327
00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:22,855
If it's the church
of some hot chick's
crotchless panties,

328
00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:25,224
'cause that's where I'm
gonna be on Sunday.

329
00:20:25,292 --> 00:20:27,694
Boom, boom.

330
00:20:32,031 --> 00:20:34,166
Closing time.

331
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,270
Say hi to the other Dockers
when you're back lifting boxes
tomorrow morning.

332
00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:39,572
[ Clicks Tongue ]

333
00:20:44,977 --> 00:20:47,714
So you're giving up.

334
00:20:49,349 --> 00:20:51,851
There's no more customers.

335
00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:53,820
I blew it.

336
00:20:53,886 --> 00:20:58,358
So you didn't make
bein' a salesman
your first try.

337
00:20:58,425 --> 00:21:01,594
There are
greater tragedies
in the world.

338
00:21:01,661 --> 00:21:04,130
But I wanted to do this.
I wanted to prove to everybody--

339
00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:07,500
- Prove what?
- That I was somebody.

340
00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:10,269
Oh, you are so full of crap.

341
00:21:10,337 --> 00:21:12,405
Look at you.

342
00:21:12,472 --> 00:21:15,408
You're six feet something,
a hundred and something,

343
00:21:15,475 --> 00:21:18,745
and you've got hardly
a speck of sales ability,

344
00:21:18,811 --> 00:21:21,047
and you hung in
with some of the best...

345
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:24,250
junior college
appliance salesmen
Camden has to offer...

346
00:21:24,317 --> 00:21:26,285
for two days.

347
00:21:26,353 --> 00:21:30,657
In this lifetime,
you don't have to prove nothin'
to nobody except yourself.

348
00:21:30,723 --> 00:21:32,725
And after what
you've gone through,

349
00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:35,362
if you haven't
done that by now,

350
00:21:35,428 --> 00:21:37,630
it ain't gonna
never happen.

351
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:47,173
I'm sorry. I failed.

352
00:21:47,239 --> 00:21:49,308
It's over.

353
00:21:58,485 --> 00:22:01,388
I let you down, Mr. Waadt.

354
00:22:01,454 --> 00:22:03,523
I'm sorry.

355
00:22:05,124 --> 00:22:09,529
Here's my tie...
and my name tag.

356
00:22:10,697 --> 00:22:13,099
I'll wash the shirt
and bring it by tomorrow.

357
00:22:23,743 --> 00:22:25,778
I'd like to buy
a refrigerator,

358
00:22:25,845 --> 00:22:29,416
and I'd like to buy it
from this Docker.

359
00:22:34,153 --> 00:22:36,789
It's too late.
Store's closed.

360
00:22:36,856 --> 00:22:41,160
Mr. Waadt said
the end of the day Sunday.
It's still Sunday.

361
00:22:41,227 --> 00:22:43,095
That's true.

362
00:22:50,937 --> 00:22:55,642
I'd like to buy a dishwasher,
and I'd like to buy it
from this Docker.

363
00:23:00,847 --> 00:23:03,850
I'd like to buy a microwave
from this Docker.

364
00:23:10,122 --> 00:23:12,592
I'd like to buy
a washer-dryer
from my brother.

365
00:23:14,961 --> 00:23:16,796
Randy, that's my card.

366
00:23:16,863 --> 00:23:20,399
I lost mine.
Sorry I wasn't nicer
to you before.

367
00:23:34,614 --> 00:23:38,350
[ Earl Narrating ]
So one by one, my fellow Dockers
helped me start my new career.

368
00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:41,788
And I must've been right
about how wantin' to get ahead
was a good thing...

369
00:23:41,854 --> 00:23:45,257
'cause I was feelin'
pretty good.

370
00:23:45,324 --> 00:23:49,962
Joy, on the other hand,
wasn't havin' the same luck
with her new Mexican career.

371
00:23:50,029 --> 00:23:51,998
¡Vámonos!

372
00:23:52,064 --> 00:23:54,701
Oh, chasquido.