1
00:00:50,809 --> 00:00:52,362
You were incredible.

2
00:00:53,018 --> 00:00:55,227
My heart is still racing.

3
00:00:56,677 --> 00:00:58,437
I felt it too.

4
00:00:58,541 --> 00:01:00,474
All thanks to your
brute strength, Dash,

5
00:01:00,577 --> 00:01:03,718
and your knowledge of ancient
Aramaic mathematics.

6
00:01:03,822 --> 00:01:06,721
Please. This has nothing to
do with my two doctorates

7
00:01:06,825 --> 00:01:08,896
and my master's in Gender Studies

8
00:01:09,793 --> 00:01:12,762
and everything to do
with you, Dr. Lovemore.

9
00:01:13,211 --> 00:01:15,109
The truth is,

10
00:01:15,213 --> 00:01:17,594
I never thought I would
find the Lost City of D.

11
00:01:17,698 --> 00:01:20,632
I would choose your words carefully.

12
00:01:20,735 --> 00:01:22,496
They will be your last.

13
00:01:22,599 --> 00:01:26,362
You led me right to King Kalaman's tomb

14
00:01:26,465 --> 00:01:30,055
and his queen's
legendary Crown of Fire.

15
00:01:30,159 --> 00:01:33,058
And now I will be very rich,

16
00:01:33,162 --> 00:01:35,854
and you will be very dead.

17
00:01:36,786 --> 00:01:40,169
Hold up. Are these...
Are these your snakes?

18
00:01:40,272 --> 00:01:41,894
No, they were just here.

19
00:01:41,998 --> 00:01:44,449
There were just hundreds
of snakes in this temple

20
00:01:44,552 --> 00:01:46,416
just waiting for us to show up?

21
00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:48,625
- Who feeds them? You feed them?
- No, what do they eat?

22
00:01:48,729 --> 00:01:50,938
Why is that one not biting that
guy? Why is that happening?

23
00:01:51,041 --> 00:01:53,004
Are they trained not to bite
henchmen or something?

24
00:01:53,028 --> 00:01:53,906
Yeah, well...

25
00:01:54,010 --> 00:01:56,288
I mean, the
snake-to-temple ratio alone...

26
00:01:56,392 --> 00:01:58,842
This is ridiculous. Delete.

27
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,018
I... I think my character
can still work.

28
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:03,847
Delete.

29
00:02:03,951 --> 00:02:06,126
Loretta, you still have
a story to write.

30
00:02:06,816 --> 00:02:08,128
Delete.

31
00:02:10,509 --> 00:02:12,373
<i>Hey, it's me, Beth.</i>

32
00:02:12,477 --> 00:02:14,893
<i>I don't want to pull the whole
"I'm your publisher" card, but I am.</i>

33
00:02:14,996 --> 00:02:17,344
<i>And I'm really looking forward
to seeing this last chapter.</i>

34
00:02:17,447 --> 00:02:19,484
<i>But no pressure. No,
there actually is pressure.</i>

35
00:02:19,587 --> 00:02:23,764
<i>The exact amount of pressure that
motivates you but doesn't paralyze you.</i>

36
00:02:23,867 --> 00:02:25,248
<i>You got this.</i>

37
00:02:26,801 --> 00:02:27,768
Thank you.

38
00:02:27,871 --> 00:02:29,908
<i>Me again.</i>

39
00:02:30,011 --> 00:02:31,875
<i>Okay, so everything
is set for the book tour,</i>

40
00:02:31,979 --> 00:02:34,809
<i>but, uh, the only thing we
need is a book to tour with.</i>

41
00:02:34,913 --> 00:02:37,053
<i>I can't help but get the feeling
that you're not finishing</i>

42
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:39,607
<i>because you don't want
to leave your house.</i>

43
00:02:39,711 --> 00:02:44,888
<i>Listen, I know these last five years
have been hard after John's passing,</i>

44
00:02:44,992 --> 00:02:48,375
<i>and it feels easier to
live in your bathtub,</i>

45
00:02:48,478 --> 00:02:51,136
<i>drinking Chardonnay on ice.</i>

46
00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:54,035
<i>But, girl, there is a great
big world waiting for you</i>

47
00:02:54,139 --> 00:02:57,142
<i>and a book tour that I can't cancel,
so just make it happen, all right?</i>

48
00:02:57,246 --> 00:02:58,488
<i>Love you, bye!</i>

49
00:03:17,507 --> 00:03:19,026
We have to keep going.

50
00:03:20,061 --> 00:03:22,547
Let's see what's on the
other side of that door.

51
00:03:22,650 --> 00:03:24,756
But what if there isn't anything?

52
00:03:25,515 --> 00:03:27,586
There's only one way to find out.

53
00:03:28,484 --> 00:03:30,417
Then Lovemore realized

54
00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:32,798
the treasure she
wanted was lost forever

55
00:03:32,902 --> 00:03:35,284
and her adventures
were coming to an end.

56
00:03:35,387 --> 00:03:36,526
That doesn't feel right.

57
00:03:36,630 --> 00:03:38,425
Yeah, but that's it.

58
00:03:38,528 --> 00:03:39,978
That's the end.

59
00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:50,575
Well, John,

60
00:03:51,161 --> 00:03:52,266
here I go.

61
00:03:52,370 --> 00:03:54,648
Dulcius ex asperis.

62
00:04:01,171 --> 00:04:03,933
- Okay, honey, it's showtime.
- Are you sure about this?

63
00:04:04,036 --> 00:04:07,626
Because I have a wedgie in the
back and in the front in this thing.

64
00:04:07,730 --> 00:04:09,973
I feel like a nerdy figure skater.

65
00:04:10,077 --> 00:04:12,769
- Sexy. Stunner. I'm all about it.
- No, it's not. It's not.

66
00:04:12,873 --> 00:04:14,806
- How do I move in this?
- Don't touch it.

67
00:04:14,909 --> 00:04:17,118
- I'm not touching it. I'm holding it out.
- Stop it. Will you stop?

68
00:04:17,222 --> 00:04:19,397
Get it out now 'cause
you can't do that onstage.

69
00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:22,192
And we're done. And
we're done. Okay, good.

70
00:04:22,296 --> 00:04:24,194
Do I need to be wearing
a glitter onesie?

71
00:04:24,298 --> 00:04:25,748
You only have to wear
this for two hours.

72
00:04:25,851 --> 00:04:27,819
Do not mess this up, do you
hear me? This is on loan.

73
00:04:27,922 --> 00:04:29,924
Everyone's wearing sequins right now.

74
00:04:31,443 --> 00:04:33,514
- Why is she taking my photo?
- This is Allison.

75
00:04:33,618 --> 00:04:35,930
She is our new social media manager.

76
00:04:36,034 --> 00:04:38,864
And she's gonna be helping us
target that younger demographic.

77
00:04:38,968 --> 00:04:41,453
Meaning women in their 30s
who wish they were in their 20s.

78
00:04:41,557 --> 00:04:43,075
Hey, what's up?

79
00:04:43,179 --> 00:04:46,527
Um, I took over your socials,
so this morning you tweeted,

80
00:04:46,631 --> 00:04:51,808
"Where are my ladies at? Meet
me at Ballroom G at 5:00 p.m.

81
00:04:51,912 --> 00:04:53,362
ShawnMendes.

82
00:04:53,465 --> 00:04:56,330
GaggingToMeetYouAll."

83
00:04:56,434 --> 00:04:58,988
Okay, we are having fun. Let's go.

84
00:04:59,091 --> 00:05:02,060
We need to remind people
that you are still alive.

85
00:05:02,163 --> 00:05:03,579
People know I'm alive.

86
00:05:03,682 --> 00:05:05,650
And to remind them why this used to be

87
00:05:05,753 --> 00:05:07,824
- the best selling franchise.
- In Romance.

88
00:05:07,928 --> 00:05:10,551
Yes, which is the top
revenue-generating literary category.

89
00:05:10,655 --> 00:05:13,520
Revenue-generating isn't how I would
describe our presales right now.

90
00:05:13,623 --> 00:05:15,763
Just think of this as a way
that uses word of mouth.

91
00:05:15,867 --> 00:05:17,489
Oh, you want word of mouth?
Here we go. How's this?

92
00:05:17,593 --> 00:05:20,389
"The only thing more lost than
the city is the author herself."

93
00:05:20,492 --> 00:05:22,252
"Loveless." "Passionless."

94
00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:26,256
Uh, "Way past her prime." And, oh,
"This is fake history at its worst."

95
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,535
A book tour could
change everything, okay?

96
00:05:28,638 --> 00:05:30,951
We have to remind the fans
why they love you so much.

97
00:05:31,054 --> 00:05:34,644
Real history. I merely season
it with a smidge more nudity.

98
00:05:34,748 --> 00:05:36,957
History had a ton of nudity.

99
00:05:37,820 --> 00:05:39,891
<i>Deep exploration.</i>

100
00:05:39,994 --> 00:05:42,480
<i>Steamy wondering.</i>

101
00:05:42,583 --> 00:05:47,623
<i>Will Lovemore and Dash find Queen
Taha's priceless Crown of Fire?</i>

102
00:05:47,726 --> 00:05:49,521
<i>Join them on their search.</i>

103
00:05:49,625 --> 00:05:51,558
So, listen, I wanted to talk
to you about something.

104
00:05:51,661 --> 00:05:52,904
There's so many people.

105
00:05:53,007 --> 00:05:55,147
I know how much you
hate doing these things,

106
00:05:55,251 --> 00:05:57,978
so I've invited Alan to do
the Q and A with you today.

107
00:05:58,081 --> 00:06:00,083
- What?
- And the rest of the book tour.

108
00:06:00,187 --> 00:06:03,155
Beth, I expressly asked not to do any
more events with Dash... Alan, Alan!

109
00:06:03,259 --> 00:06:06,089
- He's gonna humiliate me.
- He's not gonna humiliate you.

110
00:06:06,193 --> 00:06:09,230
Thank you. You're very good at your
job. Thank you so much. Thank you.

111
00:06:09,334 --> 00:06:10,542
Let me help you with that.

112
00:06:10,646 --> 00:06:12,544
He is... He's a body wash commercial.

113
00:06:12,648 --> 00:06:14,512
He's always glistening
all over the place.

114
00:06:14,615 --> 00:06:17,515
There hasn't been an event
where his shirt didn't come flying off.

115
00:06:17,618 --> 00:06:19,137
- You wish.
- Well, he's already here,

116
00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:21,381
so put on your big-girl panties
and let's get out there.

117
00:06:21,484 --> 00:06:24,660
Remember, no grumpy face, big
words or boring academic talk.

118
00:06:24,763 --> 00:06:28,042
Yes! Yes!

119
00:06:28,146 --> 00:06:30,079
Come on, RTP!

120
00:06:30,182 --> 00:06:31,667
Ha-ha!

121
00:06:31,770 --> 00:06:34,014
Yes, my Lovemore-heads!

122
00:06:34,117 --> 00:06:37,569
I am so excited to introduce to you

123
00:06:37,673 --> 00:06:41,504
the award-winning author, Loretta Sage!

124
00:06:41,608 --> 00:06:44,162
- Beth, I can't do this. I'm not ready.
- Are you kidding me?

125
00:06:44,265 --> 00:06:45,991
Listen, I've got your
back. You got this.

126
00:06:46,095 --> 00:06:47,614
Go give the people what they want.

127
00:06:47,717 --> 00:06:49,581
- It's not me they want.
- Get out there now!

128
00:06:52,135 --> 00:06:55,967
Hi. How are you? Nice
to see you. Thank you.

129
00:07:01,317 --> 00:07:03,043
Yep. Mount it.

130
00:07:05,494 --> 00:07:08,393
Mount it. Mount it. Okay.

131
00:07:08,497 --> 00:07:10,188
Find your center.

132
00:07:10,291 --> 00:07:13,847
And now, the moment
you've all been waiting for.

133
00:07:13,950 --> 00:07:15,711
The sexiest...

134
00:07:15,814 --> 00:07:19,818
...most influential
hero of a generation.

135
00:07:19,922 --> 00:07:21,130
That's a bit strong.

136
00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:23,857
His 20th cover of an
Angela Lovemore novel.

137
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,584
Dash McMahon!

138
00:07:32,037 --> 00:07:34,557
Oh, my God! Dash!

139
00:07:57,235 --> 00:07:59,582
- Take a bow.
- I already did mine. I did mine.

140
00:07:59,686 --> 00:08:02,654
Okay, come on. One more. I got you.

141
00:08:17,669 --> 00:08:19,326
Did you guys rehearse that? Oh, my God.

142
00:08:19,429 --> 00:08:23,261
I'm loving this chemistry
between you two, and I got to say,

143
00:08:23,364 --> 00:08:25,505
I love this book.

144
00:08:25,608 --> 00:08:26,678
- Oh, thank you, Ray.
- Thank...

145
00:08:26,782 --> 00:08:28,128
Spoiler alert.

146
00:08:28,231 --> 00:08:29,509
A really bold choice

147
00:08:29,612 --> 00:08:31,545
to not have them go
into the tomb at the end.

148
00:08:31,649 --> 00:08:33,271
Talk about what went into this one.

149
00:08:33,374 --> 00:08:36,826
I mean, this one's such a
special book for me personally.

150
00:08:36,930 --> 00:08:39,760
I... I don't know how to say
how much it means to me

151
00:08:39,864 --> 00:08:41,969
that Loretta, word
writer extraordinaire,

152
00:08:42,073 --> 00:08:45,110
has, you know, named the book after me.

153
00:08:45,214 --> 00:08:47,043
The Lost City of Dash.

154
00:08:47,147 --> 00:08:48,251
The Lost City of D.

155
00:08:48,355 --> 00:08:50,599
Um, but that's not
what the D stands for.

156
00:08:50,702 --> 00:08:53,291
- It's D for "dick," right?
- No dick, no.

157
00:08:53,394 --> 00:08:56,501
It's based on the name of an ancient
tribe, Dapocagihou-dysphem-ica.

158
00:08:56,605 --> 00:09:01,161
And, um, it was too difficult for the
European colonizers to pronounce,

159
00:09:01,264 --> 00:09:04,544
- so, in true colonial fashion they abbreviated it.
- No one cares about this.

160
00:09:04,647 --> 00:09:06,373
That's so interesting. Okay.

161
00:09:06,476 --> 00:09:08,789
How about we take some
questions from the audience?

162
00:09:08,893 --> 00:09:10,688
Yes.

163
00:09:10,791 --> 00:09:14,933
Dash, what's your
favorite romantic moment?

164
00:09:15,037 --> 00:09:19,559
What I would really like to know is what
is Loretta's favorite romantic moment?

165
00:09:19,662 --> 00:09:21,595
Ooh, spicy.

166
00:09:21,699 --> 00:09:23,632
Oh, uh...

167
00:09:23,735 --> 00:09:26,427
Well, being a sapiosexual...

168
00:09:26,531 --> 00:09:28,740
Oh, is that when they do
the snakes around the...

169
00:09:28,844 --> 00:09:32,917
No. That's someone
who finds, uh, intellect

170
00:09:33,020 --> 00:09:36,921
or intelligence, uh,
very sexy, you know.

171
00:09:37,024 --> 00:09:38,129
Same.

172
00:09:38,612 --> 00:09:39,855
Really?

173
00:09:39,958 --> 00:09:42,374
Dash! Rip off your shirt!

174
00:09:42,478 --> 00:09:46,206
No, no, no. We're not gonna do that
today. We're here for Loretta's book.

175
00:09:46,309 --> 00:09:48,173
Do we have questions for Loretta?

176
00:09:48,277 --> 00:09:53,454
Uh, yes, studious-looking young
lady? What would you like to ask me?

177
00:09:53,558 --> 00:09:55,595
Can you rip off Dash's shirt?

178
00:09:57,148 --> 00:09:59,978
No, no. We're not gonna
do this again. Sorry.

179
00:10:00,082 --> 00:10:02,602
Rip it off! Rip it off!

180
00:10:02,705 --> 00:10:05,018
Rip it off! Rip it off! Rip it off!

181
00:10:05,121 --> 00:10:08,849
Of course. Of course, yes. Can do.

182
00:10:09,816 --> 00:10:11,093
Is this happening?

183
00:10:11,196 --> 00:10:12,922
- You don't have to do this.
- Oh, we have to.

184
00:10:13,026 --> 00:10:15,097
We have to give the people
what they want. Yes, yes.

185
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,927
We have to give the people
what they want, yes.

186
00:10:18,031 --> 00:10:21,275
Ladies and gentlemen, enjoy.

187
00:10:21,379 --> 00:10:26,039
Because The Lost City of
D is Dash's final adventure.

188
00:10:26,142 --> 00:10:28,213
If there even is a next book,

189
00:10:28,317 --> 00:10:31,423
it will open with Lovemore
receiving the tragic news

190
00:10:31,527 --> 00:10:33,874
of his untimely death.

191
00:10:33,978 --> 00:10:35,358
What?

192
00:10:35,462 --> 00:10:36,912
Shit. I'm sorry. My smartwatch
is stuck.Ow. Hold on.

193
00:10:37,015 --> 00:10:38,085
I know. Don't pull it.

194
00:10:38,189 --> 00:10:39,708
It's okay. Just be real still.

195
00:10:39,811 --> 00:10:41,226
- No. That's pulling it.
- You're pulling it.

196
00:10:41,330 --> 00:10:43,919
You're gonna rip my
wig off. No, you can't...

197
00:10:48,337 --> 00:10:49,303
Oh, my!

198
00:10:49,407 --> 00:10:50,822
- Oh, my God.
- Is he okay?

199
00:10:50,926 --> 00:10:52,548
God, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

200
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:55,309
- I'm so sorry.
- You're a bad person.

201
00:10:55,413 --> 00:10:59,659
Stick around for the costume
contest at 6:00 p.m.

202
00:11:00,521 --> 00:11:02,765
"If there is another book"?

203
00:11:02,869 --> 00:11:07,770
I'm investing everything
we've got into this tour, okay?

204
00:11:07,874 --> 00:11:11,325
I just don't think I have another
Dash and Lovemore adventure in me.

205
00:11:11,429 --> 00:11:12,810
How does Dash die?

206
00:11:12,913 --> 00:11:15,053
- Was it the snakes?
- No.

207
00:11:15,157 --> 00:11:17,504
Okay, so I have something
that I have to take care of.

208
00:11:17,607 --> 00:11:20,058
You guys have an interview
in the next suite in ten minutes.

209
00:11:20,162 --> 00:11:22,578
So can you please do me
a favor and be grown-ups

210
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,200
and get yourselves there on your own?

211
00:11:24,304 --> 00:11:25,512
Okay. Thank you so much.

212
00:11:26,306 --> 00:11:28,377
Does he die from a staph infection?

213
00:11:30,344 --> 00:11:32,415
It is a staph infection. I knew it.

214
00:11:33,589 --> 00:11:34,970
I-I... All right.

215
00:11:35,073 --> 00:11:38,145
Look, I get it if you need
a break or something,

216
00:11:38,249 --> 00:11:40,251
- but you can't just kill me, okay?
- Okay.

217
00:11:40,354 --> 00:11:44,738
I hate that I have to ask this, but
you do know you're not Dash, right?

218
00:11:44,842 --> 00:11:47,016
Dash is a character I made up.

219
00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:48,362
Dash?

220
00:11:51,193 --> 00:11:52,435
Thanks.

221
00:11:52,539 --> 00:11:53,747
Thank you.

222
00:11:56,232 --> 00:11:58,510
- Loretta, it's this way.
- No, I think it's this way.

223
00:11:58,614 --> 00:12:00,961
Can't you see that Dash
means so much to people?

224
00:12:01,065 --> 00:12:02,929
- Means so much to you.
- Not to me.

225
00:12:03,032 --> 00:12:04,689
Well, yeah, to me, but
to other people too.

226
00:12:04,793 --> 00:12:07,761
- What about Beth?
- You know what? Beth is gonna be fine.

227
00:12:07,865 --> 00:12:11,696
She's gonna find plenty fresh,
young writers full of great ideas.

228
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,802
You can transition gracefully

229
00:12:13,905 --> 00:12:16,252
into the shirt-on phase
of your modeling career,

230
00:12:16,356 --> 00:12:17,702
and I can be left alone.

231
00:12:17,806 --> 00:12:19,531
Everybody is happy.

232
00:12:19,635 --> 00:12:21,430
No, it's this way.

233
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,363
Beth says you don't even
leave the house anymore.

234
00:12:23,466 --> 00:12:25,503
I don't feel like that's very happy.

235
00:12:25,606 --> 00:12:28,506
You should be going out in the world,
filling yourself up on new experiences.

236
00:12:28,609 --> 00:12:30,853
I'm already filled up.
I'm full. I'm fully satiated.

237
00:12:30,957 --> 00:12:34,305
Why would you want to be stuck at home
alone when you could see the world?

238
00:12:34,408 --> 00:12:35,927
You could be visiting ancient Greece.

239
00:12:36,031 --> 00:12:38,930
Okay. How could I visit ancient Greece?

240
00:12:39,034 --> 00:12:41,070
I get it. Because
you're afraid of flying.

241
00:12:41,174 --> 00:12:44,591
No. Because ancient
Greece is in the past.

242
00:12:44,694 --> 00:12:46,248
Just like Dash.

243
00:12:46,351 --> 00:12:49,561
Okay. You want to know who
else is stuck in the past? You are.

244
00:12:49,665 --> 00:12:52,426
You're so afraid of life hurting
you again that you've stopped living.

245
00:12:52,530 --> 00:12:54,843
You're like a human mummy.

246
00:12:56,327 --> 00:12:58,363
I didn't, um...

247
00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:00,814
Oh.

248
00:13:00,918 --> 00:13:03,058
Mummies are human.

249
00:13:12,343 --> 00:13:14,310
Stupid... Oh, crap.

250
00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:17,348
I'm so sorry. I-I will clean this up.

251
00:13:17,451 --> 00:13:19,937
I am not a litterer,
I-I assure you that.

252
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:23,526
Do you, um... Do you think you
could, uh, call a car for me, please?

253
00:13:23,630 --> 00:13:25,149
Thank you. Thank you.

254
00:13:27,910 --> 00:13:29,084
Bring the car around.

255
00:13:29,187 --> 00:13:30,637
God, is that someone's retainer?

256
00:13:30,740 --> 00:13:33,088
I've never said the right
thing one time around her.

257
00:13:33,191 --> 00:13:35,124
I get nervous because
she opens her mouth,

258
00:13:35,228 --> 00:13:39,680
and just an encyclopedia of beautifulness
comes out, and I just never say...

259
00:13:39,784 --> 00:13:41,096
You know she's trying to kill me?

260
00:13:41,199 --> 00:13:43,374
I just need those tomatoes.

261
00:13:43,477 --> 00:13:45,825
You're right. No, you're right.

262
00:13:45,928 --> 00:13:47,412
I should apologize. Thank you, man.

263
00:13:47,516 --> 00:13:49,759
- I appreciate that very, very much.
- You're welcome.

264
00:13:59,908 --> 00:14:02,186
Uh, Loretta Sage. Yeah.

265
00:14:07,398 --> 00:14:08,502
Uh...

266
00:14:09,814 --> 00:14:11,022
Hiya.

267
00:14:11,126 --> 00:14:12,610
Uh, I did not order an UberPool.

268
00:14:12,713 --> 00:14:15,682
Someone wants to meet you.
We'll have you right back.

269
00:14:15,785 --> 00:14:16,959
Um...

270
00:14:20,445 --> 00:14:21,722
Loretta!

271
00:14:21,826 --> 00:14:23,345
Loretta! Loretta?

272
00:14:26,244 --> 00:14:28,108
Uh, Loretta?

273
00:14:28,212 --> 00:14:30,800
- Did you say "Loretta"?
- Yeah.

274
00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:32,112
- Follow that SUV, man.
- No.

275
00:14:32,216 --> 00:14:33,976
- Come on, please!
- No, no, no.

276
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:37,152
I'm not helping any more handsome
strangers. Fool me once. Mm-mmm.

277
00:14:37,255 --> 00:14:40,569
What is this, Taken? Am I "tooken"?

278
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:42,088
Am I sold already?

279
00:14:42,191 --> 00:14:45,194
Am I... Am I sold to him?

280
00:14:45,298 --> 00:14:48,957
- Ow. Stop.
- Oh, no. Did this feel creepy?

281
00:14:49,060 --> 00:14:51,683
I said don't make it creepy, guys.

282
00:14:51,787 --> 00:14:53,616
I'm so sorry about the setting.

283
00:14:53,720 --> 00:14:56,309
I just flew in. I was in a
real panic to meet you.

284
00:14:56,412 --> 00:14:58,483
I didn't have time to
dress the place up much.

285
00:14:58,587 --> 00:15:01,383
I read you love cheese,
so I just got them all.

286
00:15:01,486 --> 00:15:05,559
Are you the one who's been
emailing me for photos of my feet?

287
00:15:05,663 --> 00:15:07,527
No. Um...

288
00:15:07,630 --> 00:15:11,945
And I promise what I'm about to show
you is gonna make you very happy.

289
00:15:12,704 --> 00:15:13,913
But first, a little bit

290
00:15:14,016 --> 00:15:17,226
about the mysterious
rogue you see before you.

291
00:15:17,330 --> 00:15:19,608
Uh, my name is Abigail Fairfax.

292
00:15:19,711 --> 00:15:22,645
- Abigail?
- It's a gender-neutral name, like Leslie or Beverly.

293
00:15:22,749 --> 00:15:26,442
Yes, but you're Abigail Fairfax
of the media-mogul Fairfaxes?

294
00:15:27,374 --> 00:15:30,584
Didn't you just take
over your company or...

295
00:15:30,688 --> 00:15:34,623
No, that was my brother, actually.
That was Leslie. We're all very proud.

296
00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:37,833
Ah. Yes, I should say so,
at such a young age to...

297
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:39,869
Some might even say too young.

298
00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:42,700
But that world never
really interested me.

299
00:15:42,803 --> 00:15:45,392
My passions, as you may know,

300
00:15:45,496 --> 00:15:48,602
lie in the hidden things in the world,

301
00:15:48,706 --> 00:15:51,329
things which defy possession.

302
00:15:51,433 --> 00:15:54,470
Um, some might call me a collector.

303
00:15:54,574 --> 00:15:58,267
But there is one
obsession in particular

304
00:15:58,371 --> 00:16:00,476
that has held me captive.

305
00:16:01,650 --> 00:16:03,134
The Crown of Fire

306
00:16:03,238 --> 00:16:05,619
and its cascading red diamonds.

307
00:16:05,723 --> 00:16:09,382
Is this a... Is this a
hidden-camera thing?

308
00:16:09,485 --> 00:16:13,075
So imagine my surprise
when, in your new book,

309
00:16:13,179 --> 00:16:16,458
amidst the pages of coital reverie,

310
00:16:16,561 --> 00:16:17,390
was something...

311
00:16:17,493 --> 00:16:19,564
- Oh, God...
- quite magnificent.

312
00:16:21,428 --> 00:16:23,983
I get it. I get it. I
so get it right now.

313
00:16:24,086 --> 00:16:25,398
Oh, my gosh.

314
00:16:25,501 --> 00:16:27,676
I literally thought you
guys kidnapped me.

315
00:16:27,779 --> 00:16:30,265
I mean, this is marketing,
right? Beth set this up?

316
00:16:30,368 --> 00:16:33,268
This was so good, you
guys. This was amazing.

317
00:16:33,371 --> 00:16:36,616
You, with your gun and your mustache

318
00:16:36,719 --> 00:16:39,688
and your, "You'd better get
in there" and you know...

319
00:16:40,896 --> 00:16:42,415
Oh, my God.

320
00:16:42,518 --> 00:16:46,281
You, with the G.I. Joe
tone-on-tone outfit.

321
00:16:46,384 --> 00:16:51,389
Your fictional archaeologist was making
real translations of a dead language.

322
00:16:51,493 --> 00:16:54,392
- Mm-hmm.
- Something nobody else has been able to do.

323
00:16:54,496 --> 00:16:56,912
Well, nobody else had ever tried.

324
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,845
Is that right? Am I
saying the right thing?

325
00:16:58,948 --> 00:17:00,605
Except you, right?

326
00:17:00,709 --> 00:17:02,676
Except me!

327
00:17:02,780 --> 00:17:04,506
Yes. See, it turns out

328
00:17:04,609 --> 00:17:07,923
Loretta Sage was once a young
college girl doing her dissertation

329
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,891
on the dead language of
the D with her future husband,

330
00:17:10,995 --> 00:17:14,102
dreaming of finding Kalaman's
tomb and the Crown of Fire.

331
00:17:14,205 --> 00:17:17,312
I was sorry to read you gave
up your search after he died.

332
00:17:17,415 --> 00:17:19,038
But what that means is,

333
00:17:20,315 --> 00:17:22,213
you're all I have left.

334
00:17:22,317 --> 00:17:25,492
All-All you have left for... what?

335
00:17:25,596 --> 00:17:26,631
Hmm.

336
00:17:28,426 --> 00:17:29,669
Oh.

337
00:17:29,772 --> 00:17:31,153
Here we go.

338
00:17:45,271 --> 00:17:46,996
What is this?

339
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:50,793
I believe it is describing the
exact location of Kalaman's tomb,

340
00:17:50,897 --> 00:17:54,349
in which Taha and her
priceless headdress are buried.

341
00:17:54,452 --> 00:17:56,592
Well, if this were authentic,

342
00:17:56,696 --> 00:18:02,046
you would still have
to uncover an entire city

343
00:18:02,150 --> 00:18:05,187
that nobody has been able to find.

344
00:18:05,291 --> 00:18:06,947
I found it.

345
00:18:07,051 --> 00:18:10,192
On a tiny, forgotten island in
the Atlantic called Isla Hundida.

346
00:18:10,296 --> 00:18:13,851
What I have not been able to
find is Kalaman's final resting place.

347
00:18:13,954 --> 00:18:18,235
This piece of parchment is the
only clue we found among the ruins.

348
00:18:18,338 --> 00:18:21,479
I need someone who can
decipher these symbols.

349
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:23,654
I need you.

350
00:18:24,793 --> 00:18:26,243
- Well...
- Miss Sage,

351
00:18:26,346 --> 00:18:29,729
surely this isn't how you
want your story to end.

352
00:18:29,832 --> 00:18:32,421
We both had our dreams
crushed by bad luck,

353
00:18:32,525 --> 00:18:34,768
or in my case, an
arse-kissing little brother,

354
00:18:34,872 --> 00:18:37,978
but this is our chance
to show them all.

355
00:18:38,082 --> 00:18:39,670
Come with me... to the island.

356
00:18:39,773 --> 00:18:44,916
Translate these symbols and
help me find the Crown of Fire.

357
00:18:45,020 --> 00:18:47,643
You can name your price.

358
00:18:50,267 --> 00:18:53,097
I must respectfully decline.

359
00:18:57,964 --> 00:18:59,172
Well...

360
00:19:00,794 --> 00:19:02,762
I can't say I'm not disappointed.

361
00:19:03,659 --> 00:19:06,145
But I understand how you feel.

362
00:19:09,493 --> 00:19:11,253
Will you at least let
us give you a ride?

363
00:19:11,357 --> 00:19:15,637
Oh, no, thank you. I'll call
for my own car, and I'll just...

364
00:19:37,210 --> 00:19:40,972
I don't feel like you're listening
to me. This is urgent, and we...

365
00:19:41,076 --> 00:19:44,010
Okay, so the police are saying
that they put out an APB...

366
00:19:44,113 --> 00:19:45,770
- APB...
- on an SUV,

367
00:19:45,874 --> 00:19:48,117
- and there's this 24-hour rule...
- Why is there a rule?

368
00:19:48,221 --> 00:19:50,637
- ...and they won't do anything until...
- What about the FBI or the CIA?

369
00:19:50,741 --> 00:19:52,708
- They said to call the police.
- I'm sure Loretta's fine.

370
00:19:52,812 --> 00:19:55,401
When I was in college, my
friend Nicki went missing.

371
00:19:55,504 --> 00:19:57,126
Everyone was, like, freaking out.

372
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,577
But then she was just in her car.

373
00:19:59,681 --> 00:20:02,856
She was dead, but we
found her. She wasn't gone.

374
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:07,309
Um, what about...
Maybe we could get a PI

375
00:20:07,413 --> 00:20:09,932
or, like, you know,
private security or...

376
00:20:10,036 --> 00:20:11,934
What about an extraction
team, like the movie?

377
00:20:12,038 --> 00:20:14,523
Yes! But who does that?
The ex-military, right?

378
00:20:14,627 --> 00:20:17,216
Oh, yeah. I think I actually have
somebody that could help us.

379
00:20:17,319 --> 00:20:20,288
- Oh.
- I did this meditation retreat,

380
00:20:20,391 --> 00:20:22,462
and there was this trainer guy there.

381
00:20:22,566 --> 00:20:24,084
You should see this guy meditate.

382
00:20:24,188 --> 00:20:25,603
But he's ex-Navy SEAL.

383
00:20:25,707 --> 00:20:29,504
He... He's a special ops
trainer. What was his name?

384
00:20:30,194 --> 00:20:31,333
Yeah. Jack Trainer.

385
00:20:31,437 --> 00:20:33,059
So he's a trainer named Jack Trainer?

386
00:20:33,162 --> 00:20:35,337
That's how I have everybody in
my phone. See, "Janice Mom."

387
00:20:35,441 --> 00:20:36,890
"Larry Doorknob." "Stacy Butt Stuff."

388
00:20:36,994 --> 00:20:39,686
Look, this is what this
guy does. He finds people.

389
00:20:39,790 --> 00:20:42,068
If there's anybody that
can help us, it's him.

390
00:20:49,006 --> 00:20:51,526
- <i>Jack Trainer.</i>
- Oh, so his name is actually Jack Trainer.

391
00:20:51,629 --> 00:20:55,530
Hi, uh, this is Alan from
"Touching Your Inner Self."

392
00:20:57,014 --> 00:20:58,843
The meditation retreat?

393
00:21:00,569 --> 00:21:03,641
Anyway, uh, okay. Our friend
Loretta has been kidnapped,

394
00:21:03,745 --> 00:21:05,194
and no one's helping us.

395
00:21:05,298 --> 00:21:06,782
<i>How long she been missing?</i>

396
00:21:06,886 --> 00:21:08,128
Maybe two hours now.

397
00:21:08,232 --> 00:21:09,544
<i>Who is that?</i>

398
00:21:09,647 --> 00:21:13,686
Um, this is B... This
is Beth. I'm Beth.

399
00:21:13,789 --> 00:21:16,205
And Allison is on too, sir.

400
00:21:16,309 --> 00:21:18,518
<i>Did she have any Wi-Fi-enabled devices?</i>

401
00:21:18,622 --> 00:21:21,521
- She's got her phone, right?
- No, I have her phone.

402
00:21:21,625 --> 00:21:24,248
Oh! She has a smartwatch.
It ripped my wig off.

403
00:21:24,352 --> 00:21:27,286
<i>What was that scenario?
Never mind. Open the phone.</i>

404
00:21:27,389 --> 00:21:28,942
- <i>Go to the smartwatch app.</i>
- All right.

405
00:21:29,046 --> 00:21:31,359
<i>Then hit "Find My Smartwatch."</i>

406
00:21:31,462 --> 00:21:34,396
Oh, my... That is so good.
That's why we called.

407
00:21:34,500 --> 00:21:36,950
<i>"Anticipate the difficult
by managing the easy."</i>

408
00:21:37,054 --> 00:21:40,747
- Is that Oprah or Deepak?
<i>- Laozi fromTao-te Ching.</i>

409
00:21:40,851 --> 00:21:42,059
Oh, my God.

410
00:21:42,162 --> 00:21:43,854
It's in the Atlantic.

411
00:21:43,957 --> 00:21:46,305
- She's on a plane?
- How can you tell that?

412
00:21:46,408 --> 00:21:48,583
'Cause she can't swim that fast.

413
00:21:48,686 --> 00:21:50,136
<i>Doesn't sound like a ransom scenario.</i>

414
00:21:50,239 --> 00:21:52,863
<i>My guess is blood sport,
Hunger Games type situation.</i>

415
00:21:52,966 --> 00:21:55,797
<i>Possibly some coke-fueled
dark web scavenger hunt.</i>

416
00:21:55,900 --> 00:21:57,937
<i>Real clown shit. We'll
have to move fast.</i>

417
00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:00,974
- How do we pay you?
- <i>Cryptocurrency. Cash App.</i>

418
00:22:01,078 --> 00:22:04,564
<i>I'll have her back within 48 hours
or your next rescue is free.</i>

419
00:22:04,668 --> 00:22:06,152
How many people need a next rescue?

420
00:22:06,255 --> 00:22:07,774
More than you'd think.

421
00:22:07,878 --> 00:22:09,707
<i>- I'm gonna need that phone.</i>
- I'll bring it to you.

422
00:22:09,811 --> 00:22:12,572
<i>Let me know where she lands.
I'll meet you there, Alan.</i>

423
00:22:27,380 --> 00:22:28,623
Hello.

424
00:22:33,213 --> 00:22:34,353
Where am I?

425
00:22:34,456 --> 00:22:36,458
Um, you're on my plane.

426
00:22:36,562 --> 00:22:37,770
It's nice, isn't it? Hmm?

427
00:22:37,873 --> 00:22:39,703
The seats are made
of mama llama leather.

428
00:22:39,806 --> 00:22:42,913
Well, I'm getting off your plane.

429
00:22:43,016 --> 00:22:44,397
Unchain me!

430
00:22:44,501 --> 00:22:46,054
That's your seat belt.

431
00:22:46,641 --> 00:22:48,505
Did you chloroform me?

432
00:22:48,608 --> 00:22:50,817
People actually do that?

433
00:22:53,199 --> 00:22:55,857
Well, you know, it's
a classic for a reason.

434
00:22:56,547 --> 00:22:57,790
My body feels drunk.

435
00:22:57,893 --> 00:22:59,792
It'll wear off in a bit. I am sorry.

436
00:22:59,895 --> 00:23:02,311
I just couldn't wait around
for you to change your mind.

437
00:23:02,415 --> 00:23:04,866
- Stop playing jelly.
- Time is not on our side.

438
00:23:04,969 --> 00:23:07,696
You see, the volcano
we're excavating around

439
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:09,767
has developed a bad
case of indigestion.

440
00:23:09,871 --> 00:23:11,735
I'm rather worried that when it blows,

441
00:23:11,838 --> 00:23:13,909
everything that's left of the
Lost City will be destroyed.

442
00:23:14,013 --> 00:23:15,911
Oh, my God. My legs don't work.

443
00:23:16,015 --> 00:23:21,434
So, this is our last chance to
find both the tomb and the crown.

444
00:23:21,538 --> 00:23:23,574
Oh, God. Oh!

445
00:23:23,678 --> 00:23:25,956
Don't worry. That's
just our final descent.

446
00:23:26,059 --> 00:23:32,065
But it is the beginning of the
greatest adventure of your life.

447
00:24:40,686 --> 00:24:42,757
Welcome to the Lost City.

448
00:24:52,387 --> 00:24:53,802
How did you find it?

449
00:24:53,906 --> 00:24:56,046
So, the city was built on a lava dome.

450
00:24:56,149 --> 00:24:58,842
As the volcano became active,
the dome filled with lava,

451
00:24:58,945 --> 00:25:01,569
and sunken things rose to the surface.

452
00:25:01,672 --> 00:25:03,571
The D exposed itself.

453
00:25:03,674 --> 00:25:06,712
- The entire city?
- No, no. Just the tip.

454
00:25:06,815 --> 00:25:10,025
As soon as I heard rumors of the ruins,
I flew over and bought the place.

455
00:25:10,129 --> 00:25:13,408
- The site?
- No. The island. The southern half.

456
00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:15,859
I got a good deal 'cause
this is where the lava flows.

457
00:25:15,962 --> 00:25:18,206
We've been excavating for a year now.

458
00:25:19,276 --> 00:25:21,830
One doesn't kidnap a
romance novelist on day one.

459
00:25:21,934 --> 00:25:23,970
Ah, yes, as the saying goes.

460
00:25:24,074 --> 00:25:27,077
Rafi doesn't like it. Do you, Rafi?

461
00:25:27,180 --> 00:25:30,356
He says we're
disrespecting his heritage.

462
00:25:30,459 --> 00:25:33,704
But not a lot of other job options
on the island, are there, Rafi?

463
00:25:33,808 --> 00:25:35,879
Beggars can't be choosers.

464
00:25:45,716 --> 00:25:47,546
No more charcuterie, I take it.

465
00:25:47,649 --> 00:25:49,755
Mmm. Please. I'm not a monster.

466
00:25:49,858 --> 00:25:51,688
Whatever you need, just shout.

467
00:25:53,206 --> 00:25:58,073
Uh, leave one hand free.
She has some translating to do.

468
00:25:59,281 --> 00:26:00,524
And then what?

469
00:26:00,628 --> 00:26:03,147
Loretta, I really wish
you would try and see

470
00:26:03,251 --> 00:26:05,391
what an exciting
opportunity this is for us.

471
00:26:05,494 --> 00:26:09,395
I believe this text describes
the exact location of the tomb.

472
00:26:09,498 --> 00:26:12,018
It's a logographic system.

473
00:26:12,778 --> 00:26:15,366
Like cuneiform or hieroglyphics.

474
00:26:15,470 --> 00:26:19,267
Now, if you have other documents
that possibly I can compare...

475
00:26:19,370 --> 00:26:20,648
Yeah, no luck there.

476
00:26:20,751 --> 00:26:23,547
We found some scratching
at a nearby waterfall,

477
00:26:23,651 --> 00:26:24,548
but it was useless.

478
00:26:24,652 --> 00:26:26,205
Just pictures of women.

479
00:26:26,308 --> 00:26:30,899
Look, I, too, wish your dear
old dead archaeologist husband

480
00:26:31,003 --> 00:26:33,730
was here to help, but he's not, so,

481
00:26:33,833 --> 00:26:36,940
time to shine, Loretta,
sex-book writer.

482
00:26:38,355 --> 00:26:40,081
They will come for me.

483
00:26:40,668 --> 00:26:42,393
Who, exactly?

484
00:26:42,497 --> 00:26:44,223
Your... Your many cats?

485
00:26:44,326 --> 00:26:46,121
Oh, I don't have cats.

486
00:26:46,708 --> 00:26:48,537
Somehow even more sad.

487
00:26:48,641 --> 00:26:51,610
I have a hamster, asshole!

488
00:26:51,713 --> 00:26:53,370
You have a hamster's asshole?

489
00:26:53,473 --> 00:26:57,236
No, there was a... there was
a comma between... Forget it.

490
00:26:57,339 --> 00:27:00,757
I bet your brother never
had to kidnap anyone!

491
00:27:51,497 --> 00:27:53,085
Good to see you, man.

492
00:27:53,188 --> 00:27:54,811
- Phone.
- Right.

493
00:28:06,685 --> 00:28:07,927
What?

494
00:28:08,031 --> 00:28:10,619
Yeah, I was thinking
that I could, you know,

495
00:28:10,723 --> 00:28:12,311
maybe just sort of come with you.

496
00:28:12,414 --> 00:28:14,175
- Why?
- To help.

497
00:28:14,278 --> 00:28:18,420
I know CPR. I know some
light karate. CrossFit certified.

498
00:28:18,524 --> 00:28:20,043
Okay, okay, listen, listen!

499
00:28:20,906 --> 00:28:22,597
I just... It's my fault.

500
00:28:22,701 --> 00:28:24,806
Not the kidnapping and stuff,

501
00:28:24,910 --> 00:28:27,982
but, like, I said some really
mean stuff to her, and I regret it,

502
00:28:28,085 --> 00:28:29,708
and I just need to take it back.

503
00:28:29,811 --> 00:28:31,192
I called her a human mummy.

504
00:28:32,538 --> 00:28:33,953
Mummies are human.

505
00:28:34,609 --> 00:28:37,025
I'm aware of that now, yes.

506
00:28:37,129 --> 00:28:40,166
That is true.

507
00:28:40,270 --> 00:28:41,271
Please.

508
00:28:42,548 --> 00:28:45,240
All right, Alan, I can't
be responsible for you.

509
00:28:46,207 --> 00:28:47,208
Okay. Yeah.

510
00:28:47,311 --> 00:28:50,280
- I need you to stay in the car.
- Yeah.

511
00:28:50,383 --> 00:28:52,489
- In the car.
- In the car.

512
00:28:52,592 --> 00:28:55,043
- The whole time.
- The whole time?

513
00:28:55,147 --> 00:28:56,389
Whole time.

514
00:28:56,493 --> 00:28:57,736
Mm-hmm.

515
00:28:59,496 --> 00:29:00,773
Yes!

516
00:29:07,711 --> 00:29:09,057
This is me.

517
00:29:09,955 --> 00:29:12,233
Really? Is this what
the SEAL teams use?

518
00:29:12,336 --> 00:29:14,994
"Only a fool chooses
a horse by its color."

519
00:29:15,098 --> 00:29:17,894
Right, right. The Tao-te Ching?

520
00:29:17,997 --> 00:29:21,138
No, it was on the sign back
there at the rental place.

521
00:29:29,664 --> 00:29:30,872
Thank you.

522
00:30:03,698 --> 00:30:05,148
What? What?

523
00:30:07,391 --> 00:30:09,393
I was hoping to
invite you to breakfast,

524
00:30:09,497 --> 00:30:12,155
but it looks like you
still have work to do.

525
00:30:13,121 --> 00:30:14,882
Uh, wait, wait, wait.

526
00:30:14,985 --> 00:30:16,504
Wait. Wait, wait, wait.

527
00:30:16,607 --> 00:30:18,609
I believe this says

528
00:30:18,713 --> 00:30:20,715
"rest" or "resting."

529
00:30:20,819 --> 00:30:23,718
So it would be, "Kalaman
and his treasure..."

530
00:30:23,822 --> 00:30:28,309
And then there are some missing
pieces, and then "rest," "resting,"

531
00:30:28,412 --> 00:30:31,830
and something about "tears," so...

532
00:30:33,624 --> 00:30:34,625
Resting where?

533
00:30:34,729 --> 00:30:35,937
Hmm? Oh!

534
00:30:36,041 --> 00:30:38,802
Didn't say. It doesn't say.

535
00:30:40,148 --> 00:30:43,151
Miss Sage, I need you to do better.

536
00:30:43,255 --> 00:30:46,706
Then next time maybe don't
kidnap a romance novelist, hmm?

537
00:30:46,810 --> 00:30:49,019
My God, this shouldn't be this hard!

538
00:30:49,123 --> 00:30:51,056
It is not some pauper's
grave we're looking for.

539
00:30:51,159 --> 00:30:53,437
It is a monument to a great man!

540
00:30:53,541 --> 00:30:55,474
King Kalaman was
ambitious, he was powerful,

541
00:30:55,577 --> 00:30:58,028
he was the first man to
build a city in the Atlantic.

542
00:30:58,132 --> 00:31:00,789
The eyes of his subjects
would have turned to him.

543
00:31:00,893 --> 00:31:04,138
He would have had a
pyramid, a ziggurat, a tower

544
00:31:04,241 --> 00:31:06,209
to hold his Crown of Fire.

545
00:31:06,312 --> 00:31:09,212
All I need to know is where it is.

546
00:31:09,315 --> 00:31:12,560
I don't know if you recall,
but you only said translate it.

547
00:31:12,663 --> 00:31:14,803
I-I translated it.

548
00:31:15,597 --> 00:31:17,185
Translate it again.

549
00:31:22,811 --> 00:31:25,849
One day, we're gonna laugh about this.

550
00:31:25,953 --> 00:31:28,093
Such an adventure we're having.

551
00:31:31,199 --> 00:31:35,548
I should go with you, just
for backup and awesomeness.

552
00:31:36,515 --> 00:31:38,172
This is pretty awesome.

553
00:31:38,275 --> 00:31:40,933
You got nature, the radio.

554
00:31:42,072 --> 00:31:45,696
Yeah, you're right, but it's
very, very important to me

555
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:47,664
that she knows that
I came to rescue her.

556
00:31:47,767 --> 00:31:49,459
Why? Do you like this woman?

557
00:31:50,460 --> 00:31:52,669
No, I just brought snacks and stuff.

558
00:31:52,772 --> 00:31:54,947
And she gets a little
grumpy when she's hungry.

559
00:31:55,051 --> 00:31:58,468
Blood pressure drops. And I get that
because I'm a five-meal-a-day kind of guy.

560
00:31:58,571 --> 00:32:01,367
Do you keto, by the way?
You look like you keto.

561
00:32:01,471 --> 00:32:03,162
- No.
- No. Yeah.

562
00:32:03,266 --> 00:32:04,992
You don't need it.

563
00:32:05,095 --> 00:32:06,579
What is it?

564
00:32:06,683 --> 00:32:10,273
I just want her to think of me
as more than a cover model.

565
00:32:10,376 --> 00:32:14,622
But, Alan, you are so much
more. You're my lookout.

566
00:32:14,725 --> 00:32:18,074
Okay, can I at least do the
part where I put her in the car

567
00:32:18,177 --> 00:32:21,905
and I just go, "Shh. You're safe now"?

568
00:32:22,975 --> 00:32:24,977
Sure, champ. She'll love that.

569
00:32:25,081 --> 00:32:26,945
Oh, you're just going? Going to start?

570
00:32:27,048 --> 00:32:29,464
You're starting the mission now? Okay.

571
00:32:53,661 --> 00:32:55,870
Oh!

572
00:33:04,913 --> 00:33:06,398
Go to sleep.

573
00:33:35,220 --> 00:33:36,359
- Alan.
- What?

574
00:33:36,462 --> 00:33:38,223
This is a breach of trust, Alan.

575
00:33:38,326 --> 00:33:39,879
I can help. Let me help.

576
00:33:43,262 --> 00:33:45,920
Stay close. Stay alive.

577
00:33:50,787 --> 00:33:52,030
Hey.

578
00:33:56,965 --> 00:33:58,484
Go to sleep.

579
00:34:00,866 --> 00:34:04,973
I got his head. What do I do with his
head? I'm just gonna set him down.

580
00:34:11,118 --> 00:34:12,326
No.

581
00:34:12,912 --> 00:34:14,086
Hey, hey, no!

582
00:34:14,190 --> 00:34:15,398
No, no, no!

583
00:34:22,957 --> 00:34:24,786
Ooh, yeah! Ooh.

584
00:34:24,890 --> 00:34:25,856
Ow.

585
00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:27,513
Teamwork, yeah!

586
00:34:27,617 --> 00:34:30,896
Great effort, Alan, but that
man was already unconscious.

587
00:34:30,999 --> 00:34:32,691
I was already wound up.

588
00:34:33,623 --> 00:34:36,384
Just don't do it when I'm...

589
00:34:39,456 --> 00:34:40,733
Hi.

590
00:34:42,977 --> 00:34:44,703
Oh!

591
00:34:45,980 --> 00:34:47,602
On your seven!

592
00:34:52,538 --> 00:34:53,608
Oh!

593
00:34:58,406 --> 00:35:00,339
Trainer, he's not asleep!

594
00:35:00,443 --> 00:35:02,617
Stay... Stay down. Stay down.

595
00:35:05,275 --> 00:35:07,795
- You're doing great.
- Thanks.

596
00:35:07,898 --> 00:35:09,417
Where you going?

597
00:35:17,563 --> 00:35:19,047
Loretta Sage?

598
00:35:19,531 --> 00:35:20,325
Yes.

599
00:35:20,428 --> 00:35:22,292
I'm getting you out of here.

600
00:35:23,328 --> 00:35:26,365
- Why are you so handsome?
- My dad was a weatherman.

601
00:35:28,574 --> 00:35:29,403
A-Alan?

602
00:35:29,506 --> 00:35:31,543
- Yeah.
- What are you doing here?

603
00:35:31,646 --> 00:35:34,442
- Uh, irregardless, I'm here to save you.
- That's not...

604
00:35:34,546 --> 00:35:36,789
- I think he meant "regardless."
- Yes.

605
00:35:38,205 --> 00:35:42,174
Ooh, uh, does she need saving in there,
Trainer? I think she's fine there.

606
00:35:42,278 --> 00:35:45,453
No, no, leave it. Don't take
their stuff. They'll come after us.

607
00:35:48,111 --> 00:35:49,664
Alan, why do you keep doing that?

608
00:35:49,768 --> 00:35:51,735
Why do you keep doing
that? I had that one.

609
00:35:51,839 --> 00:35:54,359
It's just getting mean
now. It's unnecessary.

610
00:35:54,462 --> 00:35:56,223
I'm sorry. I just wanted to get one in.

611
00:35:56,326 --> 00:35:58,618
Excuse me. Would it be possible
to remove me from the chair?

612
00:35:58,642 --> 00:35:59,398
No time.

613
00:35:59,502 --> 00:36:01,918
No time? There's been so much chitchat.

614
00:36:02,021 --> 00:36:03,333
We should definitely go.

615
00:36:03,437 --> 00:36:05,059
Let's go! Let's go!

616
00:36:30,912 --> 00:36:32,051
Why are things exploding?

617
00:36:39,714 --> 00:36:40,750
I got...

618
00:36:42,407 --> 00:36:43,615
Okay.

619
00:36:44,512 --> 00:36:45,789
Shh...

620
00:36:45,893 --> 00:36:47,791
Shh. You're safe now.

621
00:36:47,895 --> 00:36:49,034
You're...

622
00:36:49,137 --> 00:36:51,278
How... How are you so calm?

623
00:36:51,381 --> 00:36:53,866
- That was my... That was my line.
- Here.

624
00:36:56,006 --> 00:36:57,905
- What?
- Is that Reiki?

625
00:36:58,008 --> 00:37:00,459
- Are you healing me?
- I think so.

626
00:37:00,563 --> 00:37:03,773
- Ah.
- As Laozi says, "To the mind that is still..."

627
00:37:03,876 --> 00:37:06,776
- "...the whole universe surrenders."
- Hey, yeah, I know some...

628
00:37:06,879 --> 00:37:09,675
I know some, um, quotes that
could be good for this moment.

629
00:37:09,779 --> 00:37:11,505
In omnia paratus.

630
00:37:12,402 --> 00:37:14,266
"Ready for anything."

631
00:37:14,370 --> 00:37:17,027
Maybe we shouldn't be just
staring lovingly into each other's eyes

632
00:37:17,131 --> 00:37:20,583
like you're gonna fall
in love like I'm not here.

633
00:37:21,135 --> 00:37:22,101
Who are you?

634
00:37:22,205 --> 00:37:24,932
Just a guy trying to do his job.

635
00:37:25,035 --> 00:37:27,831
And right now, that job
is to get this lovely lady...

636
00:37:28,660 --> 00:37:30,178
Oh! Oh.

637
00:37:30,282 --> 00:37:32,180
Oh, God. Okay.

638
00:37:33,354 --> 00:37:35,563
No. What is happening?

639
00:37:39,015 --> 00:37:40,982
Okay. What do we do?

640
00:37:41,086 --> 00:37:43,191
We need to do... I can't see.

641
00:37:43,295 --> 00:37:44,710
I don't like it!

642
00:37:44,814 --> 00:37:46,298
Here. Here!

643
00:37:46,402 --> 00:37:48,852
- Why would you throw a gun?
- Seriously?

644
00:37:50,233 --> 00:37:53,063
- Get me out of the chair.
- I can't. We don't have time.

645
00:37:56,619 --> 00:37:58,690
Gotta squeeze! You got
to do a Kegel or something!

646
00:37:58,793 --> 00:38:01,175
- Kegel it!
- What do you think a Kegel is?

647
00:38:01,279 --> 00:38:03,660
I'm not in it, not in! Still not in!

648
00:38:03,764 --> 00:38:06,145
- You got to go in more.
- Stop. Stop. Stop it!

649
00:38:06,249 --> 00:38:08,251
Oh, oh, oh!

650
00:38:08,355 --> 00:38:11,875
Oh, God. Get in the car, get in
the car! Start the car! Start the car!

651
00:38:11,979 --> 00:38:13,256
- Go, go.
- Move your leg.

652
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:15,672
- Which one?
- Both of them! Move them!

653
00:38:19,435 --> 00:38:21,402
- Forward, forward!
- Okay. Okay.

654
00:38:21,506 --> 00:38:25,820
- I'm going! I'm going! Okay!
- Drive!

655
00:38:26,959 --> 00:38:30,584
Shh. You're safe now. Shh.

656
00:38:32,240 --> 00:38:33,621
Ow.

657
00:38:33,725 --> 00:38:35,865
- Shh. You're safe now.
- No, I'm not. Not safe.

658
00:38:35,968 --> 00:38:37,729
Oh, no, am I bleeding?

659
00:38:37,832 --> 00:38:40,835
- I don't think that's yours.
- Oh, no, that's a lot of blood.

660
00:38:42,147 --> 00:38:43,976
Cheese and rice!

661
00:38:44,080 --> 00:38:45,564
- Are those his brains?
- What?

662
00:38:45,668 --> 00:38:47,635
I think his brains are on my face!

663
00:38:47,739 --> 00:38:51,363
Definitely his brains are in my
mouth. I can taste his thoughts!

664
00:38:51,467 --> 00:38:52,675
Focus on the road.

665
00:38:52,778 --> 00:38:54,918
He just liked training people. Trainer.

666
00:38:55,022 --> 00:38:57,887
- What are you talking about?
- He loved me.

667
00:38:57,990 --> 00:39:00,579
Can you just scooch
the car over to the left?

668
00:39:00,683 --> 00:39:04,411
- Get it off. Get it off.
- Oh, God.

669
00:39:04,514 --> 00:39:05,791
Watch out!

670
00:39:10,002 --> 00:39:12,902
Oh! Oh! Oh!

671
00:39:15,145 --> 00:39:16,906
Oh, did you see...

672
00:39:19,874 --> 00:39:20,910
No.

673
00:39:26,329 --> 00:39:27,641
Oh.

674
00:39:29,090 --> 00:39:31,403
Oh, no. Oh, no.

675
00:39:31,955 --> 00:39:33,440
Oh, no.

676
00:39:41,862 --> 00:39:43,415
Oh, no.

677
00:39:44,105 --> 00:39:45,900
Alan?

678
00:39:46,004 --> 00:39:49,594
Oh, holy Christmas. Are
you okay? Are you okay?

679
00:39:49,697 --> 00:39:51,768
Do you think you could
get me out of here?

680
00:39:51,872 --> 00:39:53,425
Yeah. Okay.

681
00:39:53,529 --> 00:39:56,428
- You just flew out of the car.
- I did. I did, indeed.

682
00:39:56,532 --> 00:39:57,981
Okay. I got you. I got you.

683
00:39:58,085 --> 00:40:00,536
Can you get me out of the
chair? Get me out of the chair.

684
00:40:00,639 --> 00:40:02,469
You're right. You're
right. You're right.

685
00:40:03,815 --> 00:40:05,644
- Is that... Is that a nail filer?
- Yeah.

686
00:40:05,748 --> 00:40:07,232
- Can you just rip it?
- It's working.

687
00:40:07,335 --> 00:40:09,130
And maybe next time
I toss a gun at you,

688
00:40:09,234 --> 00:40:11,132
you can catch it instead of ducking.

689
00:40:11,236 --> 00:40:14,446
How about the next time you toss a
gun at me, you say, "Hey, Alan, catch"?

690
00:40:14,550 --> 00:40:16,414
Then maybe do that before you throw it?

691
00:40:16,517 --> 00:40:18,623
Well, "here" is a synonym for "catch."

692
00:40:18,726 --> 00:40:20,245
No, "here" is not a
cinnamon for "catch."

693
00:40:20,348 --> 00:40:22,420
In a colloquial kind
of way, yes, it is.

694
00:40:22,523 --> 00:40:24,629
You say, "Here," I
toss you a sweatshirt.

695
00:40:24,732 --> 00:40:26,734
You say, "Here," I toss you a pen.

696
00:40:26,838 --> 00:40:29,910
How 'bout just, "Hey! Catch! Gun!"

697
00:40:30,013 --> 00:40:33,016
Anything that you want to throw, I'll
catch it because you said, "Catch."

698
00:40:33,120 --> 00:40:34,880
And I'll catch it because you said it.

699
00:40:34,984 --> 00:40:37,400
That is also an option, and
then we would have a gun with us.

700
00:40:37,504 --> 00:40:38,608
That's a thing.

701
00:40:38,712 --> 00:40:40,990
- Be careful.
- Okay, we need to call...

702
00:40:41,093 --> 00:40:42,750
Be careful.

703
00:40:42,854 --> 00:40:45,373
We need to call for help, get to
the airport and get out of here.

704
00:40:45,477 --> 00:40:47,479
And I am driving.Okay.

705
00:40:49,688 --> 00:40:52,553
Oh. Oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh!

706
00:41:02,287 --> 00:41:04,669
Okay, call for... call for help.

707
00:41:04,772 --> 00:41:06,567
Where's your phone?

708
00:41:09,950 --> 00:41:10,985
Okay.

709
00:41:14,610 --> 00:41:17,440
- Tell me you caught them.
- I tagged the blond one.

710
00:41:19,097 --> 00:41:21,927
Oh, Loretta.

711
00:41:22,031 --> 00:41:24,102
What are you thinking?

712
00:41:24,205 --> 00:41:27,312
You might've killed one of them,
but his partner's still with her.

713
00:41:27,415 --> 00:41:31,074
And he is clearly
skilled, highly trained

714
00:41:32,075 --> 00:41:33,732
and very dangerous.

715
00:41:43,535 --> 00:41:47,608
So, Miss Sage said she
was gonna leave the event,

716
00:41:47,712 --> 00:41:52,371
then got in a car and left the event?

717
00:41:52,475 --> 00:41:55,167
- Did you try calling her?
- She doesn't have her phone.

718
00:41:55,271 --> 00:41:56,686
- Stolen phone.
- Didn't say that.

719
00:41:56,790 --> 00:41:58,550
Where's my magnifier?

720
00:41:58,654 --> 00:42:00,656
Listen, can you please help with Nana?

721
00:42:00,759 --> 00:42:03,141
I don't want her hearing about
Loretta 'cause it's going to upset her.

722
00:42:03,244 --> 00:42:06,316
- What about Loretta?
- Nothing, Nana. She just went on a trip.

723
00:42:06,420 --> 00:42:07,697
Good. Yeah.

724
00:42:07,801 --> 00:42:10,251
That girl needed to
get out of the house.

725
00:42:10,355 --> 00:42:14,532
So, this is the thing. Loretta's
phone is not stolen. I took it.

726
00:42:14,635 --> 00:42:19,088
I gave it to Alan. Alan then gave
it to the trainer, uh, Jack Trainer.

727
00:42:19,191 --> 00:42:21,469
And that is how we found her wearable.

728
00:42:21,573 --> 00:42:23,264
- And who's Alan?
- Dash.

729
00:42:23,368 --> 00:42:26,198
- What's that?
- He's the hero in all of her books.

730
00:42:26,302 --> 00:42:29,339
- Nana. Hey, slut.
- Mm-mmm.

731
00:42:29,443 --> 00:42:32,377
Let's go in the other room and talk
about whichever war you lived through.

732
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:35,622
Okay. Come on, it'll be
fun. I'm sorry. It'll be fun.

733
00:42:35,725 --> 00:42:37,658
Listen, Loretta Sage is missing.

734
00:42:37,762 --> 00:42:39,971
When I looked at her smartwatch,
it said that she had flown

735
00:42:40,074 --> 00:42:41,731
to some island I've
never even heard about.

736
00:42:41,835 --> 00:42:43,561
That means y'all need to
do something about this.

737
00:42:43,664 --> 00:42:46,046
And if you can't, I will, and
that won't look good for you.

738
00:42:46,149 --> 00:42:48,876
Pretty sure that's
outside our jurisdiction.

739
00:42:48,980 --> 00:42:52,017
- You'd have to call the Feds.
- Okay.

740
00:42:52,121 --> 00:42:54,502
And if you do go to the Feds,
put in a good word for me.

741
00:42:54,606 --> 00:42:56,988
- For me.
- For us.

742
00:43:02,614 --> 00:43:04,133
Oh, oh.

743
00:43:11,174 --> 00:43:13,418
What are you gonna do,
put the car back together?

744
00:43:13,521 --> 00:43:15,731
Well... we could...

745
00:43:31,643 --> 00:43:34,335
- Where did you say the phone was?
- Passenger glove.

746
00:43:34,439 --> 00:43:36,199
- What?
- Passenger glove compartment.

747
00:43:36,303 --> 00:43:37,545
Goodness.

748
00:43:38,650 --> 00:43:40,169
Oh, my God.

749
00:43:40,272 --> 00:43:42,516
Oh, my God. No phone, no
car. We're so gonna die out...

750
00:43:42,620 --> 00:43:44,345
- Here.
- What is this?

751
00:43:44,449 --> 00:43:46,106
Boots for the jungle.

752
00:43:46,969 --> 00:43:48,798
It's not exactly hiking boots, but...

753
00:43:48,902 --> 00:43:51,559
I figured your feet would be killing
you after wearing heels for this long.

754
00:43:51,663 --> 00:43:54,010
It was the best we could
do. They're Allison's. Sorry.

755
00:43:54,804 --> 00:43:56,875
Oh. Okay, well, thank you.

756
00:43:56,979 --> 00:43:58,774
Here, oh, I got you cheese.

757
00:43:58,877 --> 00:44:00,672
- Oh, my God.
- You got to stay hydrated.

758
00:44:00,776 --> 00:44:02,743
- Thank you so much.
- They didn't have glass bottles,

759
00:44:02,847 --> 00:44:04,849
so we'll definitely hold
onto it and recycle.

760
00:44:07,437 --> 00:44:12,132
Okay, so what we need to do is find a
phone, we need to call the authorities,

761
00:44:12,235 --> 00:44:15,135
and we need to wait here until
somebody comes and rescues us.

762
00:44:15,238 --> 00:44:18,759
Uh... This... This is the rescue.

763
00:44:18,863 --> 00:44:20,140
No one else is coming.

764
00:44:20,243 --> 00:44:22,211
- I'm sorry?
- I'm the rescue.

765
00:44:22,314 --> 00:44:25,248
It was originally just gonna be me,
then I was like, Trainer should come.

766
00:44:25,352 --> 00:44:27,078
Oh, Trainer. Rest in peace.

767
00:44:27,181 --> 00:44:31,427
So, our best bet is to get to the
airport. See this road right here?

768
00:44:31,530 --> 00:44:34,223
From this area, just take a shortcut
through the jungle to the road.

769
00:44:34,326 --> 00:44:36,225
Did you just say "shortcut
through the jungle"?

770
00:44:36,328 --> 00:44:37,847
- Yeah.
- Okay, do you see us?

771
00:44:37,951 --> 00:44:40,470
- Uh-huh.
- You are not Dash, and I'm not Lovemore. Okay?

772
00:44:40,574 --> 00:44:41,989
I'm Loretta, and you are Alan.

773
00:44:42,093 --> 00:44:44,405
- And jungles eat people like us, okay?
- Eat people.

774
00:44:44,509 --> 00:44:47,823
And I don't want to mess up the jumpsuit.
It's on loan. So we're gonna stay put.

775
00:44:47,926 --> 00:44:49,859
We're not just gonna
stand around here, okay?

776
00:44:49,963 --> 00:44:51,343
We're gonna go through the jungle,

777
00:44:51,447 --> 00:44:53,552
we're gonna go to the
airport and find a phone,

778
00:44:53,656 --> 00:44:55,751
so you can have your cake
and get what you want.

779
00:44:55,775 --> 00:44:56,659
"And eat it too"?

780
00:44:56,763 --> 00:44:59,213
If that's what you want to do
with your cake, fine. Let's go.

781
00:44:59,317 --> 00:45:01,250
- That's the only thing you do with cake.
- Not mine.

782
00:45:01,353 --> 00:45:03,804
I don't know what your people
do, but my people eat it.

783
00:45:03,908 --> 00:45:06,117
You could give it to someone as a gift.

784
00:45:06,220 --> 00:45:08,429
Those people are still
going to eat the cake.

785
00:45:08,533 --> 00:45:10,086
Everybody eats cake.

786
00:45:10,190 --> 00:45:12,019
What about the kind people jump out of?

787
00:45:12,123 --> 00:45:15,057
- They don't eat it, when they're in it.
- Oh, my God.

788
00:45:41,359 --> 00:45:42,947
What did they kidnap you for anyhow?

789
00:45:43,050 --> 00:45:44,914
Is it some weird sex stuff like Taken?

790
00:45:45,018 --> 00:45:46,571
Oh, my God, thank you.

791
00:45:46,674 --> 00:45:49,401
I thought so too, but the
guy's one of the Fairfaxes.

792
00:45:49,505 --> 00:45:51,334
- Beverly?
- No, the older one.

793
00:45:51,438 --> 00:45:54,890
The really odd one that had the
vlog on finding Montezuma's treasure.

794
00:45:54,993 --> 00:45:57,409
The dude that was on the news
for trying to raise the Titanic?

795
00:45:57,513 --> 00:45:59,308
Yes, he's looking
for the Crown of Fire.

796
00:45:59,411 --> 00:46:03,381
Wait a minute. Like the actual
Crown of Fire? Like the one...

797
00:46:03,484 --> 00:46:06,833
- So those ruins were...
- They were the Lost City of D, yes.

798
00:46:06,936 --> 00:46:09,249
- What? Are you kidding me right now?
- Shh.

799
00:46:09,352 --> 00:46:10,802
This is like your book.

800
00:46:10,906 --> 00:46:13,736
So we're basically on a Lovemore
and Dash adventure right now?

801
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:15,842
What is that?

802
00:46:15,945 --> 00:46:18,430
What if Fairfax
actually finds the crown?

803
00:46:18,534 --> 00:46:19,915
He won't. He won't.

804
00:46:22,089 --> 00:46:23,194
- Where do we go?
- Uh...

805
00:46:23,297 --> 00:46:25,265
Oh, oh, oh.

806
00:46:28,337 --> 00:46:30,477
Okay, uh, we need to get in the water.

807
00:46:30,580 --> 00:46:32,686
- W-What?
- We need to go by river.

808
00:46:32,790 --> 00:46:34,619
No, no, I don't really do water.

809
00:46:34,722 --> 00:46:37,070
What do you mean, "do water"? I'm
not asking you to procreate with it.

810
00:46:37,173 --> 00:46:39,624
Uh, my body and water
don't really go together.

811
00:46:39,727 --> 00:46:42,075
How do you feel about dying? Oh, God.

812
00:46:42,178 --> 00:46:44,042
Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're okay. You're okay.

813
00:46:44,146 --> 00:46:46,976
- I got you. Fine.
- I can swim. I can swim. Thank you very much.

814
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:49,151
- Where are you going?
- I'm crossing.

815
00:46:49,254 --> 00:46:51,222
No, we have to stay in the water.

816
00:46:51,325 --> 00:46:53,776
I researched aquatic counter-tracking
for my book, A Year in the Bush.

817
00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:55,882
They'll lose our tracks in the water.

818
00:46:55,985 --> 00:46:58,781
Why is it warm here?
Wait, are you peeing?

819
00:46:58,885 --> 00:47:00,887
Just go around it.

820
00:47:29,674 --> 00:47:31,193
Okay, I think...

821
00:47:31,296 --> 00:47:33,195
I think we lost them, right?

822
00:47:33,298 --> 00:47:36,301
Yeah. That wasn't so bad. Yeah.

823
00:47:36,405 --> 00:47:38,062
Okay, uh...

824
00:47:38,165 --> 00:47:40,581
- Don't panic.
- What do you mean, don't panic?

825
00:47:40,685 --> 00:47:41,893
- Just don't panic.
- No.

826
00:47:41,997 --> 00:47:43,757
Stop saying "panic." I'm panicking now.

827
00:47:43,861 --> 00:47:45,724
You have something on your back.

828
00:47:47,243 --> 00:47:48,037
No!

829
00:47:48,141 --> 00:47:49,625
- Stop screaming.
- What is that?

830
00:47:49,728 --> 00:47:50,971
- What is that?
- Stop screaming.

831
00:47:51,075 --> 00:47:52,524
- Do you have any on you?
- No. No.

832
00:47:52,628 --> 00:47:54,078
Why don't you have any on you?

833
00:47:54,181 --> 00:47:55,976
Maybe the jumpsuit scared
them off. I don't know.

834
00:47:56,080 --> 00:47:57,598
- Get 'em off.
- Oh, my God.

835
00:47:57,702 --> 00:48:00,222
Okay. No, I can't touch those
blood-gorged mucous sacks.

836
00:48:00,325 --> 00:48:01,775
- Can you fling it?
- Right now.

837
00:48:01,879 --> 00:48:03,259
- Get it.
- Just pick it and fling it.

838
00:48:03,363 --> 00:48:05,261
- Just pick it and fling it.
- You pick it and fling it!

839
00:48:05,365 --> 00:48:07,436
- Can you spin it off?
- Please, get it off.

840
00:48:07,539 --> 00:48:09,576
I don't like touching
it. I'm feeling faint.

841
00:48:09,679 --> 00:48:12,786
- They're sucking my soul out.
- Okay, okay. Stop, stop, stop.

842
00:48:14,443 --> 00:48:16,686
Don't make that sound.

843
00:48:20,276 --> 00:48:21,760
How many of them are there?

844
00:48:21,864 --> 00:48:23,383
Oh, there's not many.

845
00:48:23,486 --> 00:48:25,488
- It feels like there's so many.
- What are you...

846
00:48:25,592 --> 00:48:26,904
- I feel so many.
- Oh!

847
00:48:27,007 --> 00:48:29,561
- Holy mother of God!
- Why are you praying?

848
00:48:29,665 --> 00:48:32,702
Is it that bad? It can't be that
bad. Is it that bad? How many?

849
00:48:32,806 --> 00:48:34,049
It's not great.

850
00:48:34,152 --> 00:48:35,809
They're gonna suck every bit of me out.

851
00:48:35,913 --> 00:48:38,570
Just please stop speaking. I
just need to... need to get low.

852
00:48:38,674 --> 00:48:40,400
Hold on a second.

853
00:48:40,503 --> 00:48:43,299
Oh, God! I can feel them just...
they're just sucking out so much.

854
00:48:43,403 --> 00:48:46,268
I'm gonna be like a shriveled-up
skin sack when they're done.

855
00:48:46,371 --> 00:48:48,339
You cannot tell my dad
I died this way, okay?

856
00:48:48,442 --> 00:48:52,481
You gotta tell him I was wrestling an
anaconda with a sword or something.

857
00:48:52,584 --> 00:48:55,380
I'm like a blood Jamba Juice.
They're just sucking it all out.

858
00:48:55,484 --> 00:48:57,106
Why are they all on my butt though?

859
00:48:57,210 --> 00:48:59,833
Kind of like picking anchovies
off my Caesar salad.

860
00:48:59,937 --> 00:49:01,662
- It's actually not so bad.
- Anchovies?

861
00:49:01,766 --> 00:49:03,354
Why do you go to food right now?

862
00:49:03,457 --> 00:49:06,322
Just find the queen, and
let's be done with this.

863
00:49:06,426 --> 00:49:08,773
Think you're good. I need
to just check your front.

864
00:49:08,876 --> 00:49:11,120
Okay. I can't look.

865
00:49:13,364 --> 00:49:14,675
Is it bad?

866
00:49:14,779 --> 00:49:17,885
- Uh, wow.
- What is it? Just say it.

867
00:49:17,989 --> 00:49:21,337
I mean, you expect
it to, you know, not...

868
00:49:21,441 --> 00:49:24,168
Then suddenly there
it is, and it is, uh...

869
00:49:24,271 --> 00:49:26,515
- You know, you get excited for a person.
- What?

870
00:49:26,618 --> 00:49:29,242
- I mean, I'm excited for all people.
- Why are you excited?

871
00:49:29,345 --> 00:49:31,658
Well, you know, people
wonder, they wonder,

872
00:49:31,761 --> 00:49:33,384
but they don't know, right?

873
00:49:33,487 --> 00:49:35,973
They don't, until
suddenly they do know,

874
00:49:36,076 --> 00:49:40,391
and then they... they know
something that wasn't known before.

875
00:49:40,494 --> 00:49:42,358
Just... Do I have any leeches or not?

876
00:49:42,462 --> 00:49:46,569
Oh, your plucky warrior
hangs in tranquil solitude.

877
00:49:46,673 --> 00:49:47,777
What?

878
00:49:47,881 --> 00:49:50,021
No, you're good. You're good.

879
00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:52,886
We were so brave just then.

880
00:49:52,990 --> 00:49:55,233
Why do they go for the butt so much?

881
00:50:16,530 --> 00:50:19,395
What's that song you're singing?

882
00:50:19,499 --> 00:50:22,502
A song my abbi used to
sing to me when I was a kid.

883
00:50:23,468 --> 00:50:26,126
"If you suck life from the island...

884
00:50:26,230 --> 00:50:29,026
...the island will suck of you."

885
00:50:29,129 --> 00:50:33,064
Your grandma sang you songs about
getting sucked off by an island?

886
00:50:33,168 --> 00:50:35,515
It doesn't translate super well.

887
00:50:36,412 --> 00:50:39,243
Is phantom leech
syndrome, like, a thing?

888
00:50:39,346 --> 00:50:41,348
They don't lay eggs, do they?

889
00:51:30,466 --> 00:51:31,674
Queen Taha?

890
00:51:45,274 --> 00:51:49,658
"King Kalaman and his
treasure laid to rest..."

891
00:51:50,590 --> 00:51:54,249
laid to rest in the
well of endless tears.

892
00:51:54,352 --> 00:51:56,285
"Laid to rest in the
well of endless tears."

893
00:51:56,389 --> 00:51:58,253
- What does that mean?
- Loretta!

894
00:51:58,943 --> 00:52:00,669
You gave me a heart attack.

895
00:52:01,359 --> 00:52:03,016
Where'd you go?

896
00:52:07,089 --> 00:52:08,642
What is this?

897
00:52:08,746 --> 00:52:11,990
I'm not sure, but maybe
they gathered here?

898
00:52:14,545 --> 00:52:17,203
Can you imagine being right here,

899
00:52:17,306 --> 00:52:19,964
right in this very spot back then?

900
00:52:20,067 --> 00:52:21,793
The stories that they told?

901
00:52:21,897 --> 00:52:24,658
So much history I'm
sure happened right here.

902
00:52:29,974 --> 00:52:31,355
They've got us cornered.

903
00:52:31,458 --> 00:52:33,150
- Okay. We've got to go up. Come on.
- What?

904
00:52:33,253 --> 00:52:36,360
Have you seen what I'm wearing?
I'm in a glitter straitjacket.

905
00:52:36,463 --> 00:52:39,432
There's nowhere to go
but up. Come on. Let's go.

906
00:52:39,535 --> 00:52:43,090
Oh! I should not be doing
this. I'm too old for this.

907
00:52:43,194 --> 00:52:44,299
No, you're not. You're beautiful.

908
00:52:44,402 --> 00:52:46,059
I didn't say I'm not beautiful.

909
00:52:46,163 --> 00:52:48,061
I said I'm too old to be doing this.

910
00:52:48,165 --> 00:52:51,789
My skill is sitting and thinking
and eating when I can't think.

911
00:52:51,892 --> 00:52:54,309
Yeah, you definitely could be
wearing better shoes for this.

912
00:52:54,412 --> 00:52:56,311
You brought me these shoes.

913
00:52:56,414 --> 00:52:58,968
I can't go any further.
I can't go any further.

914
00:52:59,072 --> 00:53:00,798
I'm not doing so great here.

915
00:53:00,901 --> 00:53:02,317
You got it. Come on.

916
00:53:02,420 --> 00:53:04,284
I know you think that
you're safer holding on,

917
00:53:04,388 --> 00:53:05,665
but you have to keep going.

918
00:53:05,768 --> 00:53:07,667
- I can't. I can't, I can't.
- Okay?

919
00:53:08,461 --> 00:53:09,910
- Do you smell that?
- Smell what?

920
00:53:10,014 --> 00:53:11,774
- I smell something.
- Is it a predator? What is it?

921
00:53:11,878 --> 00:53:13,811
- A downward cascading fire?
- You got to smell deeper.

922
00:53:13,914 --> 00:53:15,088
I don't smell anything!

923
00:53:18,505 --> 00:53:21,750
Take a big, deep breath.

924
00:53:21,853 --> 00:53:23,165
All right.

925
00:53:23,269 --> 00:53:24,891
Good job.Okay.

926
00:53:24,994 --> 00:53:28,619
- That was manipulative. Thank you.
- Yeah, it was.

927
00:53:28,722 --> 00:53:31,208
Here we go. I'm gonna help
you out a little bit, all right?

928
00:53:31,311 --> 00:53:33,382
- One, two, three... Here we go!
- What are you doing?

929
00:53:33,486 --> 00:53:34,866
- Get out of there.
- Come on.

930
00:53:34,970 --> 00:53:37,041
- No, no, don't flex.
- That's my hoo-hoo.

931
00:53:37,144 --> 00:53:40,078
Just ride the head. Keep the
hands moving and ride the head.

932
00:53:40,182 --> 00:53:41,494
- Oh, God.
- You're doing great.

933
00:53:41,597 --> 00:53:44,255
Sorry about the scratchy
haircut. Come on.

934
00:54:04,344 --> 00:54:06,588
Dulcius ex asperis.

935
00:54:07,174 --> 00:54:08,555
What was that?

936
00:54:08,659 --> 00:54:10,177
Oh, nothing.

937
00:54:10,281 --> 00:54:12,525
It was just something
that John and I would say

938
00:54:12,628 --> 00:54:15,769
after we finished
something big, like a...

939
00:54:15,873 --> 00:54:17,840
like an archaeological
dig or a manuscript.

940
00:54:17,944 --> 00:54:21,258
It's Latin. It means
"sweeter after difficulty."

941
00:54:22,397 --> 00:54:23,777
What's...

942
00:54:23,881 --> 00:54:25,814
What's Latin for "Loretta's a badass"?

943
00:54:25,917 --> 00:54:30,405
I am a badass. I climbed a mountain.

944
00:54:30,508 --> 00:54:33,477
Oh, my God. I wish Beth
could've seen us do this.

945
00:54:33,580 --> 00:54:36,411
- Oh, God. Beth.
- Don't worry about Beth.

946
00:54:36,514 --> 00:54:40,000
She's probably got the whole
navy after us right now.

947
00:54:40,104 --> 00:54:43,176
<i>I get that you think you have to
go to the island authorities yourself,</i>

948
00:54:43,280 --> 00:54:46,697
<i>but don't worry, I'm keeping
Loretta's socials super active.</i>

949
00:54:46,800 --> 00:54:49,182
<i>Just tweeted, "Did I
just get kidnapped?</i>

950
00:54:49,286 --> 00:54:52,806
<i>FML, @ShawnMendes, ShawnMendes."</i>

951
00:54:52,910 --> 00:54:54,567
And you're traveling alone?

952
00:54:54,670 --> 00:54:57,501
Yes, I'm traveling alone.
Mm-hmm. I'm single.

953
00:54:58,087 --> 00:54:59,296
Then this might work.

954
00:54:59,399 --> 00:55:01,228
- Okay! Talk to me.
- You'll hit New York.

955
00:55:01,332 --> 00:55:04,853
From there, you'll fly to Guinea, where
you can pick up a puddle jumper.

956
00:55:04,956 --> 00:55:06,026
A what?

957
00:55:06,958 --> 00:55:08,443
- Small plane.
<i>- Yeah, no leg room.</i>

958
00:55:08,546 --> 00:55:09,720
That's fine. I'll take it.

959
00:55:09,823 --> 00:55:11,860
- <i>Or you could just come home.</i>
- Thank you.

960
00:55:19,730 --> 00:55:22,215
We need something more flammable.
Everything is just so wet.

961
00:55:22,319 --> 00:55:23,837
What's in here? What's in your bag?

962
00:55:23,941 --> 00:55:25,805
- Uh...
- Oh, a lot. Okay.

963
00:55:25,908 --> 00:55:27,358
What are you doing?

964
00:55:27,462 --> 00:55:29,326
Okay. Face masks.

965
00:55:29,429 --> 00:55:30,844
Yeah, that was like
a gift-basket thing.

966
00:55:30,948 --> 00:55:32,915
You brought a scented
candle into the jungle?

967
00:55:33,019 --> 00:55:34,296
My mom gave me that.

968
00:55:34,400 --> 00:55:35,953
It was like a weird
gift for Mother's Day.

969
00:55:36,056 --> 00:55:38,335
Your mom gives you
gifts for Mother's Day?

970
00:55:39,646 --> 00:55:40,440
Noir...

971
00:55:40,544 --> 00:55:42,511
Eucalyptus rosemary oil. Ooh.

972
00:55:43,098 --> 00:55:44,375
Oh, that smells good.

973
00:55:44,479 --> 00:55:46,653
Um... Oh, okay. All right.

974
00:55:46,757 --> 00:55:48,379
Whoo! Yes!

975
00:55:48,483 --> 00:55:50,933
Yes, I made fire!

976
00:55:51,037 --> 00:55:54,592
- That's pretty impressive. You have to...
- It is a beautiful fire.

977
00:55:54,696 --> 00:55:56,629
Who would have thought?

978
00:55:56,732 --> 00:55:59,217
Oh, you're just, um,
taking your shirt off?

979
00:56:00,322 --> 00:56:02,359
That looks really uncomfortable.

980
00:56:02,462 --> 00:56:04,361
Are you okay? The back?

981
00:56:04,464 --> 00:56:08,537
Yeah. That is why I don't do water.

982
00:56:08,641 --> 00:56:10,919
- Okay.
- My body becomes an eighth-grader's face.

983
00:56:11,022 --> 00:56:13,887
Do you have anything for it?
Like some ointment or something?

984
00:56:13,991 --> 00:56:15,889
Yeah, I do. Well, I did.

985
00:56:15,993 --> 00:56:18,064
It was in a little, tiny little bottle.

986
00:56:18,167 --> 00:56:20,135
It was this. I'm sorry.

987
00:56:20,238 --> 00:56:22,275
Oh, God, I'm sorry.

988
00:56:22,379 --> 00:56:23,725
It's okay.

989
00:56:23,828 --> 00:56:26,141
- Hold on. Yes. Come here. Come here.
- What?

990
00:56:26,244 --> 00:56:28,661
- Come here. Sit down.
- Let me see.

991
00:56:28,764 --> 00:56:30,248
- Just sit down.
- Right here?

992
00:56:30,352 --> 00:56:31,560
Yeah.

993
00:56:32,768 --> 00:56:34,391
Okay.

994
00:56:34,494 --> 00:56:36,358
Oh, no, you don't have to
touch it. It's okay. It's fine.

995
00:56:36,462 --> 00:56:38,464
I touched your engorged sacks, so...

996
00:56:40,673 --> 00:56:42,399
- The leeches.
- Oh, okay.

997
00:56:42,502 --> 00:56:45,298
Okay, this might be a little bit cold.

998
00:56:46,472 --> 00:56:48,197
- Sorry.
- Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm.

999
00:56:48,301 --> 00:56:49,578
Sorry, sorry, sorry.

1000
00:56:49,682 --> 00:56:51,649
Maybe this is how Dash should die.

1001
00:56:51,753 --> 00:56:54,790
Horrible eczema
outbreak. That's so sexy.

1002
00:56:54,894 --> 00:56:56,413
I could make it work.

1003
00:56:56,861 --> 00:56:57,897
Yeah?

1004
00:56:58,553 --> 00:57:00,002
All right, then.

1005
00:57:01,279 --> 00:57:03,005
How would you write this?

1006
00:57:03,109 --> 00:57:04,593
Okay.

1007
00:57:06,492 --> 00:57:09,805
"Warmed by the fragrant fire..."

1008
00:57:09,909 --> 00:57:12,359
Mm-hmm.

1009
00:57:12,463 --> 00:57:14,361
Starting strong.Mm-hmm.

1010
00:57:14,465 --> 00:57:17,572
"Lovemore's hands explored the..."

1011
00:57:19,332 --> 00:57:21,817
The contoured scenery

1012
00:57:21,921 --> 00:57:23,509
of Dash's body.

1013
00:57:25,649 --> 00:57:28,341
Familiar terrain made

1014
00:57:28,445 --> 00:57:30,792
new and exciting with every...

1015
00:57:31,724 --> 00:57:34,071
"with every scarlet rim."

1016
00:57:35,175 --> 00:57:36,867
And that didn't, uh...

1017
00:57:37,695 --> 00:57:39,214
didn't turn her off?

1018
00:57:39,317 --> 00:57:40,526
No.

1019
00:57:41,354 --> 00:57:43,183
"Because with every cardinal ridge,

1020
00:57:44,184 --> 00:57:46,601
Lovemore discovered
another letter in the language

1021
00:57:46,704 --> 00:57:48,810
"that only their bodies spoke."

1022
00:57:49,845 --> 00:57:51,882
And what were their bodies saying?

1023
00:57:53,849 --> 00:57:55,402
"Take me..."

1024
00:57:57,301 --> 00:57:58,923
Take me,

1025
00:57:59,510 --> 00:58:01,201
"take me."

1026
00:58:01,305 --> 00:58:02,617
How's that?

1027
00:58:03,445 --> 00:58:04,722
It was good.

1028
00:58:04,826 --> 00:58:06,552
- Your back. I mean, how is your back?
- Good.

1029
00:58:06,655 --> 00:58:08,070
- Okay. You sure?
- Yeah.

1030
00:58:08,174 --> 00:58:12,730
- I also meant my back. Right there, yeah.
- Okay.

1031
00:58:20,980 --> 00:58:22,015
Supplies.

1032
00:58:24,155 --> 00:58:28,435
Okay, I'm chilly. I think I'm gonna
probably turn in in a little bit.

1033
00:58:28,539 --> 00:58:29,747
- Okay.
- You good?

1034
00:58:29,851 --> 00:58:32,509
Yeah, I'm fire... fine. I'm fine.

1035
00:58:32,612 --> 00:58:35,546
I'm not "fire." I'm fine by the fire.

1036
00:58:36,236 --> 00:58:37,962
Okay. All right.

1037
00:58:45,867 --> 00:58:49,180
Uh, it's up to you, but if you're cold,

1038
00:58:49,284 --> 00:58:53,495
maybe we could probably both
fit in here, if you wanted to.

1039
00:58:54,151 --> 00:58:55,877
Both of us?

1040
00:58:55,980 --> 00:58:59,018
- Only if you want to. I mean, it's just...
- Yeah, no, that sounds...

1041
00:58:59,121 --> 00:59:00,606
Uh...

1042
00:59:00,709 --> 00:59:02,090
Okay. How do you...

1043
00:59:02,193 --> 00:59:04,161
You can go first,
then I'll figure it out.

1044
00:59:04,264 --> 00:59:07,405
No, no, you go. It's definitely
a "ladies first" type of situation.

1045
00:59:07,509 --> 00:59:10,167
- Keep hands out of the bag at all times.
- That's what I was gonna do.

1046
00:59:10,270 --> 00:59:11,927
- Butt to butt.
- Hands out and butt to butt.

1047
00:59:12,031 --> 00:59:15,344
- Yeah. What do I do?
- Just get in. Go ahead and sit.

1048
00:59:15,448 --> 00:59:18,140
I sit first? Okay. I'm in.

1049
00:59:19,694 --> 00:59:22,282
You're too heavy. You're gonna
flip this thing like a cruise ship.

1050
00:59:22,386 --> 00:59:25,044
You watch yourself.
Hold on. I'm not in.

1051
00:59:25,147 --> 00:59:28,323
Why is this engaging my core so much?

1052
00:59:29,117 --> 00:59:31,015
How 'bout you shimmy?

1053
00:59:31,119 --> 00:59:33,224
- I can't breathe. I'm not breathing.
- Are you good?

1054
00:59:33,328 --> 00:59:34,640
My face.

1055
00:59:35,226 --> 00:59:36,469
Yeah. Okay.

1056
00:59:39,576 --> 00:59:41,060
Hands are out. Butt to butt.

1057
00:59:41,163 --> 00:59:42,199
Okay.

1058
01:00:13,402 --> 01:00:14,990
Well!

1059
01:00:15,094 --> 01:00:16,233
Come on.

1060
01:00:16,336 --> 01:00:17,993
Come on! Let's hear it!

1061
01:00:18,097 --> 01:00:21,583
Let's give a nice round
of applause to Loretta!

1062
01:00:21,687 --> 01:00:23,309
She earned it.

1063
01:00:23,412 --> 01:00:27,278
A geriatric shut-in left you
holding your dicks in the jungle.

1064
01:00:27,382 --> 01:00:28,763
Good job, Loretta.

1065
01:00:28,866 --> 01:00:31,386
Boss, come on. People are dying now.

1066
01:00:31,489 --> 01:00:35,148
Don't you think that maybe
this has all gone too far?

1067
01:00:36,391 --> 01:00:38,117
Is it really worth it?

1068
01:00:38,220 --> 01:00:41,603
I am on the cusp of
attaining the unattainable.

1069
01:00:41,707 --> 01:00:44,710
Something singular,
something no nation,

1070
01:00:44,813 --> 01:00:48,403
no emperor, no brownnosing
brothers ever have.

1071
01:00:48,506 --> 01:00:51,613
The legendary Crown of Fire.

1072
01:00:52,062 --> 01:00:53,201
So, yes.

1073
01:00:53,304 --> 01:00:55,617
Yes, I would definitely
say it's worth it.

1074
01:01:05,351 --> 01:01:06,870
Excuse me!

1075
01:01:06,973 --> 01:01:09,873
Excuse me, sir. I need to get
to my next connecting flight.

1076
01:01:09,976 --> 01:01:11,322
No flight.

1077
01:01:11,426 --> 01:01:14,015
The pilot is sick. Come tomorrow.

1078
01:01:14,118 --> 01:01:16,258
No, no, sir. I cannot come
tomorrow. I need to do this today.

1079
01:01:16,362 --> 01:01:21,091
I need to get to the island Isla
Hundida tonight. Lives are at stake.

1080
01:01:21,194 --> 01:01:22,679
Come tomorrow.

1081
01:01:26,510 --> 01:01:28,201
- Excuse me, miss?
- Yes?

1082
01:01:28,305 --> 01:01:32,378
I couldn't help but overhear
you say that you like steak.

1083
01:01:32,481 --> 01:01:35,761
Okay, this is a little bit crazy,

1084
01:01:35,864 --> 01:01:37,659
but I also like steak.

1085
01:01:37,763 --> 01:01:40,110
- What?
- I also like steak.

1086
01:01:40,213 --> 01:01:43,665
Would you like to,
maybe, I don't know...

1087
01:01:43,769 --> 01:01:46,599
- Maybe there's a...
- No. "Lives are at stake."

1088
01:01:46,703 --> 01:01:48,463
I need to go to the island tonight.

1089
01:01:48,566 --> 01:01:49,982
- Ah.
- Yes.

1090
01:01:50,085 --> 01:01:51,673
- Even more serious.
- Extremely.

1091
01:01:51,777 --> 01:01:54,780
Well, I believe that I
may be able to assist you.

1092
01:01:54,883 --> 01:01:56,816
I have a cargo plane.

1093
01:01:57,990 --> 01:02:01,683
Maybe after I make my delivery,
we could swing by your island.

1094
01:02:01,787 --> 01:02:04,582
I'm about to ask you something,
and you better tell me the truth.

1095
01:02:04,686 --> 01:02:06,550
Have you ever murdered anyone before?

1096
01:02:06,653 --> 01:02:09,898
No!

1097
01:02:13,488 --> 01:02:16,215
I don't know if I really buy it,
but let me tell you something.

1098
01:02:16,318 --> 01:02:20,564
If you ever think about murdering
me, I promise, I will murder you first.

1099
01:02:20,667 --> 01:02:22,014
My pleasure.

1100
01:02:22,117 --> 01:02:24,257
You are weird. Let's go.

1101
01:03:19,657 --> 01:03:23,075
"King Kalaman and his
treasure laid to rest in the well

1102
01:03:23,730 --> 01:03:25,146
of endless tears."

1103
01:03:26,837 --> 01:03:28,011
What is that?

1104
01:03:29,184 --> 01:03:32,636
Oh, it's a... it's a thing.
I mean, it's not, uh...

1105
01:03:32,739 --> 01:03:34,983
You know, it's not
what you think it is.

1106
01:03:35,087 --> 01:03:38,884
So it's not Fairfax's fragment
of an ancient parchment?

1107
01:03:38,987 --> 01:03:42,784
Okay. It's what you think it is.

1108
01:03:42,888 --> 01:03:44,337
Loretta, I thought you
were smarter than that.

1109
01:03:44,441 --> 01:03:47,237
Fairfax is never gonna
stop hunting us now.

1110
01:03:47,340 --> 01:03:48,341
What were you thinking?

1111
01:03:48,445 --> 01:03:50,412
We have a volcano
that could bury the tomb

1112
01:03:50,516 --> 01:03:54,071
before we get to it, before we see
it, before we preserve its memory.

1113
01:03:54,175 --> 01:03:56,108
- This is...
- I'm sorry. Is that what we're doing?

1114
01:03:56,211 --> 01:03:58,731
'Cause no one told me.
When were you gonna tell me?

1115
01:03:58,835 --> 01:04:00,250
Why would I tell you?

1116
01:04:00,353 --> 01:04:02,183
We're in this together. I
came here to rescue you.

1117
01:04:02,286 --> 01:04:03,978
You know you're not Dash, right?

1118
01:04:04,081 --> 01:04:06,325
You don't ride in on a
white horse to rescue people.

1119
01:04:06,428 --> 01:04:10,708
You... spray yourself with bronzer and
you stand in front of wind machines,

1120
01:04:10,812 --> 01:04:12,331
which is great for you.

1121
01:04:12,434 --> 01:04:15,092
How would you have any
idea what I'm actually like?

1122
01:04:15,196 --> 01:04:18,130
I know you. You're a
pretty open book, Alan.

1123
01:04:18,233 --> 01:04:20,028
- Okay, then who am I?
- Really?

1124
01:04:20,132 --> 01:04:21,167
Yeah.

1125
01:04:23,238 --> 01:04:25,447
O... Okay, uh...

1126
01:04:25,551 --> 01:04:28,657
You were a homecoming king and
you coasted on your good looks to LA,

1127
01:04:28,761 --> 01:04:31,281
but then realized that being the most
handsome kid in the middle of nowhere

1128
01:04:31,384 --> 01:04:33,110
doesn't mean you're going to be a star.

1129
01:04:33,214 --> 01:04:35,043
Until one day, when a woman
who couldn't publish her book

1130
01:04:35,147 --> 01:04:38,736
on Spanish colonization in the Atlantic
decided to write a romance novel,

1131
01:04:38,840 --> 01:04:40,773
uh, chose you at
random to be on the cover.

1132
01:04:40,877 --> 01:04:44,294
Lucky for you and her, the
novels were a smashing success.

1133
01:04:44,397 --> 01:04:47,400
She kept writing her
schlock, you kept posing,

1134
01:04:47,504 --> 01:04:52,958
um, you know, neither one of us
becoming who we'd hoped we would be.

1135
01:04:53,061 --> 01:04:57,169
Uh, and then one day,
we both die in the jungle

1136
01:04:57,272 --> 01:05:01,173
on one of those Atlantic islands
I wrote about all those years ago.

1137
01:05:01,276 --> 01:05:02,312
Right?

1138
01:05:03,658 --> 01:05:04,970
Mm-hmm.

1139
01:05:16,257 --> 01:05:17,983
It was Sarasota, by the way.

1140
01:05:18,500 --> 01:05:20,088
It's not nowhere.

1141
01:05:20,192 --> 01:05:22,435
I grew up there with
my mom and two sisters.

1142
01:05:22,539 --> 01:05:23,574
And yeah...

1143
01:05:24,575 --> 01:05:27,268
I started modeling 'cause
I wanted to get away.

1144
01:05:27,371 --> 01:05:29,304
It was the only job
that I could think of

1145
01:05:29,408 --> 01:05:32,652
that could take me to all of the
places that I always dreamed of going.

1146
01:05:32,756 --> 01:05:34,068
Then finally to Los Angeles,

1147
01:05:34,171 --> 01:05:36,933
where I posed on the cover
of your romance novel.

1148
01:05:37,036 --> 01:05:39,936
And I was so embarrassed that
one of my friends might've seen me

1149
01:05:40,039 --> 01:05:42,179
in that wig on the cover of your book

1150
01:05:42,283 --> 01:05:44,941
that I avoided talking
to them for months.

1151
01:05:45,907 --> 01:05:47,391
And then one day,

1152
01:05:48,116 --> 01:05:49,980
I'm walking home,

1153
01:05:50,084 --> 01:05:52,879
and I hear this lady yell, "Dash!"

1154
01:05:52,983 --> 01:05:55,503
She runs up, and she is so happy.

1155
01:05:55,606 --> 01:05:59,369
Then I thought, "How
could I be this embarrassed

1156
01:05:59,472 --> 01:06:02,165
about something that
makes people this happy?"

1157
01:06:05,513 --> 01:06:07,204
Loretta, you can do whatever you want.

1158
01:06:07,308 --> 01:06:09,413
If you don't want to
write anymore, don't write.

1159
01:06:09,517 --> 01:06:14,004
But don't minimize the people that
love your work by calling it schlock.

1160
01:06:14,108 --> 01:06:16,662
That's not fair to them.

1161
01:06:17,870 --> 01:06:20,769
You know what's ironic? I thought
you of all people would know

1162
01:06:20,873 --> 01:06:23,324
not to judge a book by its cover.

1163
01:06:27,397 --> 01:06:29,986
Judge a book by its cover model.

1164
01:07:01,465 --> 01:07:02,639
Alan?

1165
01:07:02,742 --> 01:07:04,020
Alan.

1166
01:07:15,997 --> 01:07:17,343
There's two of them.

1167
01:07:23,453 --> 01:07:26,145
- Loretta! I'm over here!
- Alan!

1168
01:07:27,215 --> 01:07:30,287
Alan! Motorcycles and
guns, motorcycles and guns!

1169
01:07:30,391 --> 01:07:32,531
Come on, this way!

1170
01:07:32,634 --> 01:07:34,257
Stop shooting!

1171
01:07:39,503 --> 01:07:41,471
- Just give 'em the parchment!
- I can't.

1172
01:07:41,574 --> 01:07:44,232
Yes, you can, actually. You just
say, "Here," and throw it at 'em.

1173
01:07:44,336 --> 01:07:46,648
Right. And then I'm sure
they'll happily let us go.

1174
01:07:46,752 --> 01:07:48,754
- Okay, keep down.
- How do they keep finding us?

1175
01:07:48,857 --> 01:07:51,343
- You're basically a walking disco ball.
- We need to come up with a plan.

1176
01:07:51,446 --> 01:07:52,516
I have an idea.

1177
01:07:52,620 --> 01:07:54,070
We're gonna dig a
hole, throw our voices.

1178
01:07:54,173 --> 01:07:56,106
"We're over here." Can
you sound like a bird?

1179
01:07:56,210 --> 01:07:58,522
- No, I have a plan.
- Alan, please, I'm thinking.

1180
01:07:58,626 --> 01:08:02,319
- I know, but I have a plan.
- Please, just let me think about...

1181
01:08:02,423 --> 01:08:06,047
- Wait a minute. They're shooting at you.
- Yeah, that's why we're hiding.

1182
01:08:06,151 --> 01:08:08,463
No. No, no, no. They're
shooting only at you.

1183
01:08:08,567 --> 01:08:11,087
They won't shoot me. It's
my brain that's valuable.

1184
01:08:11,190 --> 01:08:15,056
What? I don't think you actually
hear the things you say sometimes.

1185
01:08:15,160 --> 01:08:17,852
- Maybe I can shield you.
- You are not shielding me.

1186
01:08:17,955 --> 01:08:20,199
- I should be shielding you.
- Why? Because I'm a woman?

1187
01:08:20,303 --> 01:08:23,375
- That's supremely sexist.
- Well, look, I don't think using women as human shields

1188
01:08:23,478 --> 01:08:26,205
is exactly the change that Gloria
Seinfeld had in mind, do you?

1189
01:08:26,309 --> 01:08:29,139
- Gloria Steinem?
- Whatever. Her too. You know what? Fine.

1190
01:08:29,243 --> 01:08:32,315
- Please mansplain sexism to me right now.
- Oh, my God. I am a woman.

1191
01:08:32,418 --> 01:08:34,524
I can't mansplain anything.

1192
01:08:34,627 --> 01:08:39,356
Uh, I'm a feminist, and I think a
woman can do anything a man can do.

1193
01:08:39,460 --> 01:08:41,910
- We just need to stay here until they get tired.
- I have an idea.

1194
01:08:42,014 --> 01:08:43,705
- Please can I tell you my plan?
- Alan!

1195
01:08:43,809 --> 01:08:47,123
This is not a situation you can
get out of by ripping your shirt off.

1196
01:08:47,226 --> 01:08:49,159
Not my shirt.

1197
01:09:20,604 --> 01:09:21,916
Three!

1198
01:09:22,019 --> 01:09:23,607
- Yes!
- Oh!

1199
01:09:27,715 --> 01:09:29,579
Oh.

1200
01:09:29,682 --> 01:09:32,927
That was different
than I had in my head.

1201
01:09:33,030 --> 01:09:37,103
- I just wanted us to stop them.
- Could it have been the wind that made it do that?

1202
01:09:37,207 --> 01:09:39,313
No, I think it was us.
I think... we did it.

1203
01:09:39,416 --> 01:09:41,832
We did the one guy,
right? But that was, like...

1204
01:09:41,936 --> 01:09:45,284
We just wanted him to stop. But I think
the other guy could've moved, really.

1205
01:09:45,388 --> 01:09:47,528
So, that was... that one was on him.

1206
01:09:47,631 --> 01:09:50,496
Even if we weren't here,
that could've happened.

1207
01:09:50,600 --> 01:09:52,326
Why are you gonna stop next to a cliff?

1208
01:09:52,429 --> 01:09:54,880
They were wearing helmets,
so maybe they're...

1209
01:09:54,983 --> 01:09:57,158
But the rest of their body
didn't have a helmet.

1210
01:09:57,262 --> 01:09:58,470
So there'd just be a head.

1211
01:09:58,573 --> 01:10:00,851
They were driving recklessly, right?

1212
01:10:00,955 --> 01:10:02,681
Don't be mean on a bike.

1213
01:10:03,371 --> 01:10:05,131
Don't do mean stuff on a bike.

1214
01:10:08,928 --> 01:10:11,172
I mean, perhaps they're fine.

1215
01:10:11,276 --> 01:10:13,692
Yeah, probably not. But that's okay.

1216
01:10:13,795 --> 01:10:18,075
That's all right. You know,
things happen. Let's go.

1217
01:10:20,285 --> 01:10:23,460
- You gonna put it back together?
- It's on loan.

1218
01:10:36,266 --> 01:10:38,579
- Look at me.
- Okay.

1219
01:10:39,476 --> 01:10:41,513
What more can I do, you know?

1220
01:10:41,616 --> 01:10:43,549
You've done so much already, Beth.

1221
01:10:43,653 --> 01:10:46,690
My poor, sweet, little
Nana has lost her sight.

1222
01:10:46,794 --> 01:10:49,521
The book release is
a complete disaster,

1223
01:10:49,624 --> 01:10:51,281
which I've leveraged everything on,

1224
01:10:51,385 --> 01:10:53,732
so I'm probably, most
definitely broke right now.

1225
01:10:53,835 --> 01:10:57,080
And most importantly,
I've lost a writer.

1226
01:10:57,183 --> 01:10:58,737
Who does that? Who loses a writer?

1227
01:10:58,840 --> 01:11:03,362
Okay, Beth, you remind
me of my best friend, Randy.

1228
01:11:03,466 --> 01:11:05,951
Always looking out for other people,

1229
01:11:06,054 --> 01:11:08,402
never taking care of herself.

1230
01:11:09,403 --> 01:11:10,818
Isn't that right, Randy?

1231
01:11:13,338 --> 01:11:15,201
She's like my therapist,
this one over here.

1232
01:11:15,305 --> 01:11:17,411
LOL. "Laughing Out Loud."

1233
01:11:17,514 --> 01:11:19,482
After you take care of your friend,

1234
01:11:20,379 --> 01:11:21,725
how about we go to a beach?

1235
01:11:21,829 --> 01:11:24,314
- What?
- Look, I have a pickup in Hawaii.

1236
01:11:24,418 --> 01:11:26,385
She doesn't have to come.

1237
01:11:26,489 --> 01:11:29,285
Okay! Okay, you can come!

1238
01:11:29,388 --> 01:11:31,390
She's hilarious.

1239
01:11:32,184 --> 01:11:34,013
Let me ask you something.

1240
01:11:34,117 --> 01:11:36,222
We're all sitting here chitchatting,
but who's flying the plane?

1241
01:11:36,326 --> 01:11:38,259
- Autopilot.
- What?

1242
01:11:38,363 --> 01:11:41,089
Sir, go to the cockpit, fly the plane.

1243
01:11:41,538 --> 01:11:42,539
Okay.

1244
01:11:43,299 --> 01:11:45,059
I'm going to go land the plane.

1245
01:11:45,162 --> 01:11:46,612
Okay.

1246
01:11:46,716 --> 01:11:48,614
No, no, no. Take the
goat. Please, take the goat.

1247
01:11:48,718 --> 01:11:51,376
She's on break. Enjoy the flight!

1248
01:12:26,790 --> 01:12:28,136
- Hi.
- Hola.

1249
01:12:32,589 --> 01:12:35,281
This English dude came in
and basically kidnapped her.

1250
01:12:37,422 --> 01:12:40,735
<i>Hey, it's Beth. Please leave a message,
and I'll get right back to you.</i>

1251
01:12:40,839 --> 01:12:43,704
Uh, hi, Beth.

1252
01:12:43,807 --> 01:12:44,808
It's me.

1253
01:12:44,912 --> 01:12:46,741
Uh, I'm alive!

1254
01:12:47,466 --> 01:12:49,503
Uh, listen, um...

1255
01:12:50,814 --> 01:12:51,850
Uh...

1256
01:12:53,299 --> 01:12:57,407
I'm sorry that I blew up the book tour.

1257
01:12:57,511 --> 01:12:59,236
Um...

1258
01:12:59,340 --> 01:13:01,722
I was just afraid

1259
01:13:02,861 --> 01:13:04,518
and selfish. Uh...

1260
01:13:04,621 --> 01:13:07,348
Oh, here comes
Alan. I'll call you back.

1261
01:13:10,524 --> 01:13:13,527
So, uh, police are
searching for Fairfax,

1262
01:13:13,630 --> 01:13:16,081
and they're gonna provide
us protection while we're here.

1263
01:13:16,184 --> 01:13:18,014
Did they say how long we'd be here?

1264
01:13:18,117 --> 01:13:20,775
They're gonna try to get us on a
puddle jumper later this evening.

1265
01:13:20,879 --> 01:13:23,088
But, uh, they said in the
meantime, the inn is really nice,

1266
01:13:23,191 --> 01:13:25,780
and we can get cleaned up
and maybe a change of clothes.

1267
01:13:25,884 --> 01:13:27,299
Okay.

1268
01:13:30,751 --> 01:13:32,304
Okay. Yeah.

1269
01:14:25,081 --> 01:14:26,531
Thank you.

1270
01:14:27,117 --> 01:14:30,362
Come on.

1271
01:14:30,466 --> 01:14:31,708
Dance with your husband.

1272
01:14:31,812 --> 01:14:33,607
- No, no, no.
- He's not my husband.

1273
01:14:33,710 --> 01:14:35,436
- It's okay.
- Dance with him.

1274
01:14:35,540 --> 01:14:38,025
No, no. She doesn't want to.
She doesn't have the right shoes.

1275
01:14:38,128 --> 01:14:40,648
Actually, it's the only thing
these shoes are right for.

1276
01:14:40,752 --> 01:14:42,995
You don't have to do this.

1277
01:14:43,099 --> 01:14:44,859
It's okay. It's okay.

1278
01:14:45,757 --> 01:14:46,723
Yeah?

1279
01:16:05,353 --> 01:16:07,045
I wonder what she's saying.

1280
01:16:09,426 --> 01:16:10,911
It's folklore.

1281
01:16:12,326 --> 01:16:14,362
Love song about a woman

1282
01:16:14,466 --> 01:16:17,780
whose lover died, and she
didn't want to leave his side.

1283
01:16:18,815 --> 01:16:21,646
So she laid down and refused to get up.

1284
01:16:22,232 --> 01:16:23,993
Must be scary.

1285
01:16:24,096 --> 01:16:27,997
Having to face your future without
the person that you planned it with.

1286
01:16:40,354 --> 01:16:41,907
What was that?

1287
01:16:44,047 --> 01:16:47,706
Excuse me. Excuse me. The,
um... the last line that you sang.

1288
01:16:47,810 --> 01:16:50,157
�Qui�n llorar� junto a m�?

1289
01:16:53,091 --> 01:16:55,921
"The island will weep for me
in the well of endless tears."

1290
01:16:56,025 --> 01:16:59,407
What is that, the well of endless
tears? Is that a real place, or...

1291
01:16:59,511 --> 01:17:01,133
Sinkhole place.

1292
01:17:02,928 --> 01:17:04,654
Thank you. Gracias, gracias.

1293
01:17:04,758 --> 01:17:06,829
- Come here, come here.
- What is it?

1294
01:17:08,451 --> 01:17:10,280
Hey, on the parchment, it said,

1295
01:17:10,384 --> 01:17:14,457
"King Kalaman and his treasure laid
to rest in the well of endless tears."

1296
01:17:14,560 --> 01:17:16,666
I thought maybe it was a metaphor.

1297
01:17:17,184 --> 01:17:18,737
It's not.

1298
01:17:18,841 --> 01:17:21,706
The Well of Endless Tears is a place.

1299
01:17:21,809 --> 01:17:23,811
It's a sinkhole.

1300
01:17:23,915 --> 01:17:26,089
There's a sinkhole on the map.

1301
01:17:27,435 --> 01:17:29,196
I think the tomb is there.

1302
01:17:29,299 --> 01:17:31,681
- This is so much better than your books.
- What?

1303
01:17:31,785 --> 01:17:33,269
There's like... No, I
don't mean any offense.

1304
01:17:33,372 --> 01:17:35,271
- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- It's, like, equal.

1305
01:17:35,374 --> 01:17:37,583
- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- Look at you. You want to go there.

1306
01:17:37,687 --> 01:17:39,551
- What? No.
- I can see. Yes, you do.

1307
01:17:39,655 --> 01:17:42,761
That would be insane. That
would be insane. I just... I just...

1308
01:17:42,865 --> 01:17:47,248
It's just that we're so close
to it, but, you know, we can't...

1309
01:17:47,352 --> 01:17:48,664
No.

1310
01:17:48,767 --> 01:17:51,459
This is your story. How
do you want to write it?

1311
01:17:52,253 --> 01:17:54,566
I'd like to know that it's there,

1312
01:17:54,670 --> 01:17:56,326
that all this meant something.

1313
01:17:56,430 --> 01:17:58,294
Okay. Then let's go.

1314
01:17:58,397 --> 01:18:00,261
We'll stay one more day.
As soon as the sun's up,

1315
01:18:00,365 --> 01:18:02,125
we're gonna go find the
Well of Endless Tears.

1316
01:18:02,229 --> 01:18:05,094
- But what if it's nothing?
- So what? Then we say we tried.

1317
01:18:05,197 --> 01:18:06,440
And Fairfax?

1318
01:18:06,543 --> 01:18:08,960
The cops are after Fairfax.
Don't worry about him.

1319
01:18:10,064 --> 01:18:10,858
This is crazy.

1320
01:18:10,962 --> 01:18:12,653
- Yeah, but look at you.
- What?

1321
01:18:12,757 --> 01:18:15,725
It's the very first time I've
ever seen you totally unafraid.

1322
01:18:16,346 --> 01:18:18,072
And alive.

1323
01:18:18,176 --> 01:18:20,696
I'm gonna go tell them our plans
have changed and find us a ride.

1324
01:18:20,799 --> 01:18:22,249
Where are you going?

1325
01:18:25,908 --> 01:18:27,979
I see you met my friend here.

1326
01:18:28,082 --> 01:18:32,466
He told me you were just
about to jump on a plane,

1327
01:18:32,569 --> 01:18:35,020
without so much as saying goodbye.

1328
01:18:35,124 --> 01:18:38,541
I said, "No way. Not my Loretta.

1329
01:18:38,644 --> 01:18:43,097
Not when she's the only one
who can lead me to the tomb."

1330
01:18:46,514 --> 01:18:48,585
Stop squeezing so hard.

1331
01:18:49,414 --> 01:18:52,210
Ow. Get your hands off of me!

1332
01:18:53,073 --> 01:18:54,937
Ow! Let go!

1333
01:18:55,420 --> 01:18:56,628
I-I need a car.

1334
01:18:56,732 --> 01:18:58,664
A car, an auto. Does
anybody have an auto?

1335
01:19:07,156 --> 01:19:08,226
No, no. No.

1336
01:19:08,951 --> 01:19:10,262
I-I-I need an auto.

1337
01:19:10,366 --> 01:19:11,712
I'll trade you my watch.

1338
01:19:11,816 --> 01:19:13,231
It's a really expensive
watch. Do you have a car?

1339
01:19:13,334 --> 01:19:14,853
It's a Bulgari. This
thing glows in the dark.

1340
01:19:14,957 --> 01:19:16,752
- It's waterproof.
- I have motorcycle.

1341
01:19:30,351 --> 01:19:32,112
Cool, isn't it?

1342
01:19:32,215 --> 01:19:35,322
I always thought, why can't your
personal tank also have a minibar?

1343
01:19:35,425 --> 01:19:36,910
Have a drink.

1344
01:19:37,013 --> 01:19:38,566
Do you mind?

1345
01:19:38,670 --> 01:19:40,085
Uh, yes.

1346
01:19:40,189 --> 01:19:42,329
He has a bit of a grudge
against you, I'm afraid.

1347
01:19:42,432 --> 01:19:45,228
Something about a motorbike
accident his friends had?

1348
01:19:45,332 --> 01:19:46,505
Why are you doing this?

1349
01:19:46,609 --> 01:19:48,369
I want something nobody else has.

1350
01:19:49,267 --> 01:19:51,096
When my father gifted...

1351
01:19:54,168 --> 01:19:55,687
As I was saying,

1352
01:19:55,791 --> 01:19:58,724
when my father gifted his empire

1353
01:19:58,828 --> 01:20:01,279
to my baby brother...

1354
01:20:08,320 --> 01:20:09,839
Who is that?

1355
01:20:18,572 --> 01:20:20,781
Is that a Ken doll on a moped?

1356
01:20:21,575 --> 01:20:23,094
I know him from somewhere.

1357
01:20:23,197 --> 01:20:24,854
Oh, I-I-I doubt that.

1358
01:20:24,958 --> 01:20:27,167
Because what you are looking at

1359
01:20:27,270 --> 01:20:30,170
is a highly trained combat specialist,

1360
01:20:30,273 --> 01:20:33,863
forged in the furnaces
of Afghanistan, Iraq,

1361
01:20:33,967 --> 01:20:36,555
Kuwait, Sa... Sarasota...

1362
01:20:36,659 --> 01:20:38,730
Incredible skin. No eczema problems.

1363
01:20:38,834 --> 01:20:42,527
And he will not stop until I am safe!

1364
01:20:42,630 --> 01:20:44,840
So you pull this space tank over,

1365
01:20:44,943 --> 01:20:48,084
unless you would like to
perish like his friends did.

1366
01:20:48,188 --> 01:20:51,605
And he is responsible
for their perishment.

1367
01:20:51,708 --> 01:20:54,401
He might not have meant to,

1368
01:20:54,504 --> 01:20:57,783
but they... perished, so...

1369
01:21:12,729 --> 01:21:13,972
Okay, who-who is this?

1370
01:21:14,076 --> 01:21:15,974
I have seen him somewhere before.

1371
01:21:18,459 --> 01:21:19,702
No, no, no.

1372
01:21:19,805 --> 01:21:21,531
That's your cover model, isn't it?

1373
01:21:21,635 --> 01:21:23,913
Yes. I knew I knew him from somewhere.

1374
01:21:24,810 --> 01:21:25,881
Get up there.

1375
01:21:25,984 --> 01:21:27,365
And kill him creatively.

1376
01:21:27,468 --> 01:21:29,574
I love watching hunks fail.

1377
01:21:31,921 --> 01:21:34,165
I guess I-I will have that drink.

1378
01:21:35,856 --> 01:21:37,133
Oh, shit.

1379
01:21:37,237 --> 01:21:39,791
Is it okay if I just top 'er off?

1380
01:21:39,895 --> 01:21:41,068
Yeah, that's fine, but...

1381
01:21:41,172 --> 01:21:43,139
Oh, my God, have you
used a glass before?

1382
01:21:43,243 --> 01:21:44,589
Sorry.

1383
01:21:44,692 --> 01:21:46,177
What would Jack Trainer do?

1384
01:21:48,386 --> 01:21:49,456
It's hot in here.

1385
01:21:49,559 --> 01:21:52,562
Anyone else feeling how hot it is?

1386
01:21:52,666 --> 01:21:53,736
Are you trying to be sexy?

1387
01:21:53,839 --> 01:21:55,634
This is very weird. Please, stop.

1388
01:21:55,738 --> 01:21:57,636
I could set your world on fire.

1389
01:22:08,233 --> 01:22:10,546
Go to sleep! Go to sleep!

1390
01:22:10,649 --> 01:22:12,375
Go to sleep! Sleep!

1391
01:22:14,791 --> 01:22:16,621
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

1392
01:22:16,724 --> 01:22:18,002
Time-out.

1393
01:22:18,105 --> 01:22:19,037
Time-in!

1394
01:22:24,870 --> 01:22:27,701
No! Don't shoot her! I need her!

1395
01:22:29,358 --> 01:22:31,222
Oh, Jesus!

1396
01:22:31,325 --> 01:22:32,740
Ow, ow, ow.

1397
01:22:36,675 --> 01:22:39,092
Move your foot! Move your foot!

1398
01:22:42,164 --> 01:22:44,373
Go to sleep, asshole.

1399
01:22:44,476 --> 01:22:46,133
Get out there! Look!

1400
01:22:50,724 --> 01:22:52,036
A bigger guy?

1401
01:22:52,139 --> 01:22:53,347
Oh, no.

1402
01:22:54,693 --> 01:22:55,936
What?

1403
01:22:58,421 --> 01:22:59,353
Move it!

1404
01:23:01,079 --> 01:23:03,392
No, no, no. No, no, no.

1405
01:23:04,289 --> 01:23:06,188
Hey! Get in.

1406
01:23:06,705 --> 01:23:07,810
Him or me?

1407
01:23:11,917 --> 01:23:16,715
This is not one of your cheap,
vapid lady-fantasy books, Loretta.

1408
01:23:16,819 --> 01:23:18,786
This is real life.

1409
01:23:19,718 --> 01:23:21,582
And we will kill him.

1410
01:23:21,686 --> 01:23:23,412
Tell us where the tomb is.

1411
01:23:38,082 --> 01:23:39,393
Hi. So, whoever's in charge,

1412
01:23:39,497 --> 01:23:42,120
I need you to send
officials to go here.

1413
01:23:42,224 --> 01:23:43,328
Here.

1414
01:23:44,467 --> 01:23:46,297
We are closed.

1415
01:23:46,400 --> 01:23:47,746
You're closed?

1416
01:23:49,679 --> 01:23:52,786
You know I've been trying to
take a nap for a year and a half?

1417
01:23:52,889 --> 01:23:54,443
A year and a half.

1418
01:23:55,375 --> 01:23:58,481
I have been burning
the candle at both ends,

1419
01:23:58,585 --> 01:23:59,931
the midnight oil,

1420
01:24:00,035 --> 01:24:03,003
since way before my
friend got kidnapped.

1421
01:24:03,107 --> 01:24:04,970
And all I want to do

1422
01:24:05,523 --> 01:24:07,663
is kick my feet back

1423
01:24:07,766 --> 01:24:09,009
and drink some wine

1424
01:24:09,113 --> 01:24:11,494
that I'm probably too tired to drink.

1425
01:24:11,598 --> 01:24:13,531
And I want a massage.

1426
01:24:13,634 --> 01:24:18,294
I want someone to massage
my shoulders and my feet,

1427
01:24:18,398 --> 01:24:20,434
and I want it at the same time.

1428
01:24:20,538 --> 01:24:24,231
And I don't care if logistically
that doesn't make sense.

1429
01:24:24,335 --> 01:24:26,992
Because I have worked hard.

1430
01:24:27,855 --> 01:24:30,306
The same way that I know that you have.

1431
01:24:31,204 --> 01:24:33,413
So I hate to ask you

1432
01:24:33,516 --> 01:24:35,898
to leave this place
open a few more minutes,

1433
01:24:36,001 --> 01:24:37,934
because if we don't,

1434
01:24:38,038 --> 01:24:41,593
a very close friend of
mine and her cover model

1435
01:24:41,697 --> 01:24:43,457
are going to die.

1436
01:25:06,308 --> 01:25:07,861
No good way in, boss!

1437
01:25:07,964 --> 01:25:10,105
What about the caves?

1438
01:25:10,864 --> 01:25:12,210
That's too dangerous!

1439
01:25:12,314 --> 01:25:15,317
Well, we'll be very careful then.

1440
01:25:28,882 --> 01:25:30,194
Well, come on!

1441
01:25:34,888 --> 01:25:36,717
- This way.
- I have a rule about

1442
01:25:36,821 --> 01:25:38,340
not going into super creepy caves.

1443
01:25:49,696 --> 01:25:52,630
- Julian?
- His name is Julian?

1444
01:25:52,733 --> 01:25:55,598
He seems more like a Buck or a Bruce.

1445
01:25:55,702 --> 01:25:57,186
Lead the way.

1446
01:26:00,879 --> 01:26:03,261
Go on. Don't be scared.

1447
01:26:33,015 --> 01:26:34,810
Watch your step there.

1448
01:26:34,913 --> 01:26:36,087
Bruce!

1449
01:26:36,191 --> 01:26:37,192
- Julian. Oh, no!
- Julian!

1450
01:26:37,295 --> 01:26:38,917
Whoa.

1451
01:26:39,021 --> 01:26:40,540
Whoa.

1452
01:26:41,196 --> 01:26:42,680
Well...

1453
01:26:43,508 --> 01:26:45,234
Let's not have his death be in vain.

1454
01:26:45,338 --> 01:26:48,099
- Onward and upward.
- What do you mean onward?

1455
01:26:48,203 --> 01:26:50,653
We're not gonna go and
get him now, are we?

1456
01:26:50,757 --> 01:26:52,172
Oh, man.

1457
01:27:04,564 --> 01:27:06,221
- It's nothing.
- Okay.

1458
01:27:06,324 --> 01:27:09,016
Yeah. Look, let's just
go back to the boat.

1459
01:27:09,120 --> 01:27:10,984
This is over. Nobody else has to die.

1460
01:27:11,087 --> 01:27:13,262
No, no, no. Ha-ha! It's a breeze.

1461
01:27:13,366 --> 01:27:15,816
There's a tunnel. This
could lead to the tomb.

1462
01:27:15,920 --> 01:27:17,784
- That's not person-sized.
- Ah, speak for yourself.

1463
01:27:17,887 --> 01:27:20,165
Come on. It's
practically a kiddie slide.

1464
01:27:20,269 --> 01:27:22,582
- More like a rock sphincter.
- Or a troll anus.

1465
01:27:22,685 --> 01:27:25,067
All right, well, you are
going through the anus...

1466
01:27:25,170 --> 01:27:26,482
The hole... the tunnel!

1467
01:27:26,586 --> 01:27:28,588
- Why her?
- You are our canary in the coal mine.

1468
01:27:28,691 --> 01:27:30,106
No, that's impossible. I can't.

1469
01:27:30,210 --> 01:27:31,660
Please let us know if you get through.

1470
01:27:31,763 --> 01:27:34,076
If we don't hear from
you, Fabio's got to die.

1471
01:27:34,179 --> 01:27:36,354
Wait, I'm the damsel in distress?

1472
01:27:37,044 --> 01:27:38,287
It's okay. I'm fine.

1473
01:28:14,323 --> 01:28:16,774
I can't. I'm so sorry. I can't.

1474
01:28:16,877 --> 01:28:18,603
- Hey.
- What?

1475
01:28:19,328 --> 01:28:21,296
Hey, you smell that?

1476
01:28:21,399 --> 01:28:24,333
You mean centuries worth of bat
feces? Yes, I definitely smell that.

1477
01:28:24,437 --> 01:28:26,646
You gotta take a big breath for me.

1478
01:28:31,754 --> 01:28:33,135
There you go.

1479
01:28:33,238 --> 01:28:35,102
You can do it, Loretta.

1480
01:28:48,046 --> 01:28:50,808
I think I see a way out.

1481
01:28:54,363 --> 01:28:56,572
Oh, cheese and rice!

1482
01:29:01,266 --> 01:29:02,613
I made it!

1483
01:29:02,716 --> 01:29:04,200
I made it!

1484
01:29:04,304 --> 01:29:06,789
See? Totally safe.

1485
01:29:07,790 --> 01:29:08,860
Go on. Your turn.

1486
01:29:10,552 --> 01:29:13,451
I'm coming through!
Be right there, okay?

1487
01:30:17,619 --> 01:30:19,759
Why would they build this here?

1488
01:30:20,863 --> 01:30:22,589
But how is anyone supposed to worship

1489
01:30:22,693 --> 01:30:24,384
or remember you if
they can't even see it?

1490
01:30:24,488 --> 01:30:26,351
They aren't.

1491
01:30:26,455 --> 01:30:29,424
This isn't a monument
to Kalaman's power.

1492
01:30:30,528 --> 01:30:33,117
It's a hiding place
for a grieving woman.

1493
01:30:33,220 --> 01:30:36,672
Taha came here to
be with her fallen lover.

1494
01:30:38,329 --> 01:30:39,779
She just wanted to be alone.

1495
01:30:41,436 --> 01:30:42,954
Taha doesn't want us here.

1496
01:30:43,058 --> 01:30:44,404
God, shut up, Rafi.

1497
01:30:44,508 --> 01:30:46,371
It's just the volcano.

1498
01:30:48,028 --> 01:30:49,340
Come on.

1499
01:30:54,483 --> 01:30:56,140
We have to keep going.

1500
01:31:04,320 --> 01:31:05,977
All right. Let's go, Muscles.

1501
01:31:06,771 --> 01:31:08,601
Open it up.

1502
01:31:08,704 --> 01:31:11,155
- Don't disturb them.
- She will be wearing the headdress.

1503
01:31:11,258 --> 01:31:13,847
Come on. We didn't come all
this way just to pay our respects.

1504
01:31:13,951 --> 01:31:15,608
I can't, um...

1505
01:31:18,369 --> 01:31:20,578
- Uh...
- I'm sorry, abuela.

1506
01:31:41,806 --> 01:31:43,118
What is that?

1507
01:31:45,258 --> 01:31:47,674
Are those... seashells?

1508
01:31:48,433 --> 01:31:51,298
The crown is made of seashells?

1509
01:31:51,402 --> 01:31:52,955
Where's the treasure?

1510
01:31:53,956 --> 01:31:55,406
She's holding him.

1511
01:31:58,202 --> 01:31:59,962
You mean the dead guy?

1512
01:32:06,486 --> 01:32:07,694
Look.

1513
01:32:09,696 --> 01:32:11,422
It's their courtship.

1514
01:32:11,526 --> 01:32:15,426
Kalaman is searching
the island for something.

1515
01:32:18,256 --> 01:32:19,844
Rare red seashells.

1516
01:32:19,948 --> 01:32:24,953
To prove his love, he gave her
one shell every day for a year

1517
01:32:25,056 --> 01:32:26,610
and made them into a crown,

1518
01:32:26,713 --> 01:32:29,509
bright red like the
flame of their love,

1519
01:32:29,613 --> 01:32:32,995
until the day came where
she accepted his proposal.

1520
01:32:33,099 --> 01:32:34,859
It was never about jewels.

1521
01:32:34,963 --> 01:32:38,691
Kalaman and Taha's
riches weren't material.

1522
01:32:40,624 --> 01:32:42,557
It was their love.

1523
01:32:42,660 --> 01:32:45,007
That's what it meant. That was enough.

1524
01:32:45,111 --> 01:32:46,319
So that's it?

1525
01:32:47,216 --> 01:32:50,116
All of that time and money

1526
01:32:50,944 --> 01:32:54,534
spent on, what, just a cheap metaphor?

1527
01:32:54,638 --> 01:32:57,433
- It's a pretty rich metaphor.
- Oh, shut up!

1528
01:32:57,537 --> 01:32:59,574
We got to go. We got to go now.

1529
01:32:59,677 --> 01:33:02,853
- Come on. Let's go.
- No, no, no. You are staying here.

1530
01:33:02,956 --> 01:33:05,027
You think it's all so sweet and poetic.

1531
01:33:05,131 --> 01:33:07,616
Well, then you can stay here
and spend your last moments

1532
01:33:07,720 --> 01:33:10,654
pondering the richness
of that metaphor.

1533
01:33:11,344 --> 01:33:13,622
- Get in.
- What? Come on, man.

1534
01:33:13,726 --> 01:33:16,176
- Oh, God. Just get in. Get in the tomb.
- Okay, okay.

1535
01:33:16,280 --> 01:33:18,903
It's better to be buried alive
than buried dead, I guess.

1536
01:33:19,007 --> 01:33:22,286
- It's really not.
- You know, it is a shame, really.

1537
01:33:22,389 --> 01:33:23,908
This is a hell of a story.

1538
01:33:24,012 --> 01:33:26,704
Pity you won't be around
to tell it. Come on.

1539
01:33:26,808 --> 01:33:28,395
- But they'll die.
- So will you

1540
01:33:28,499 --> 01:33:31,088
if you don't stop being such
a snowflake! Get over here!

1541
01:33:40,684 --> 01:33:42,686
This is fine. This is not
an active nightmare

1542
01:33:42,789 --> 01:33:44,446
I've had since I was 14 years old.

1543
01:33:46,206 --> 01:33:47,691
Ow!

1544
01:33:47,794 --> 01:33:51,522
Why are you going
so fast? It's not a race.

1545
01:33:56,527 --> 01:33:58,840
Wait, no! What are you
doing? Come back here!

1546
01:33:58,943 --> 01:34:03,638
You may have bought the island,
but now the island owns you!

1547
01:34:04,500 --> 01:34:05,985
You can't just leave me here!

1548
01:34:08,021 --> 01:34:10,403
Rafi! Come back!

1549
01:34:12,577 --> 01:34:13,993
I need a boat!

1550
01:34:23,416 --> 01:34:25,521
Hey, hey, stop! Stop!

1551
01:34:27,523 --> 01:34:29,387
Help! Help!

1552
01:34:29,491 --> 01:34:31,596
One of the locals just stole my boat!

1553
01:34:31,700 --> 01:34:33,460
Have you seen a woman?

1554
01:34:33,564 --> 01:34:36,671
She's a brunette in
a sequined jumpsuit.

1555
01:34:36,774 --> 01:34:40,778
No. Is she in some sort of trouble?

1556
01:34:52,445 --> 01:34:54,171
It's kind of funny.

1557
01:34:55,586 --> 01:34:57,381
I used to think this...

1558
01:34:57,484 --> 01:34:59,383
this sort of thing was so romantic.

1559
01:34:59,486 --> 01:35:00,867
Yeah?

1560
01:35:00,971 --> 01:35:04,319
Being locked in a coffin
about to be buried by lava,

1561
01:35:04,422 --> 01:35:07,011
or... cuddling dead people?

1562
01:35:07,805 --> 01:35:10,877
Just laying down with a lost love.

1563
01:35:10,981 --> 01:35:12,189
Like Taha did.

1564
01:35:14,743 --> 01:35:15,951
God.Oh...

1565
01:35:16,538 --> 01:35:17,919
Oh, God.

1566
01:35:18,022 --> 01:35:20,231
I'm sorry.

1567
01:35:20,335 --> 01:35:22,786
I'm sorry that I couldn't save you.

1568
01:35:22,889 --> 01:35:24,857
I'm sorry I couldn't be Dash.

1569
01:35:25,443 --> 01:35:26,721
You're right.

1570
01:35:27,756 --> 01:35:29,309
You're nothing like Dash.

1571
01:35:29,413 --> 01:35:32,450
You didn't ride in on a
white horse to save me.

1572
01:35:32,554 --> 01:35:37,939
You rode in on a... borrowed
scooter with a broken muffler.

1573
01:35:39,319 --> 01:35:40,735
Yeah.

1574
01:35:40,838 --> 01:35:43,738
I never could've
written a Dash like you.

1575
01:35:45,636 --> 01:35:47,569
'Cause I never knew

1576
01:35:48,259 --> 01:35:50,054
a Dash like Alan.

1577
01:35:50,158 --> 01:35:52,608
I was so afraid of
being hurt by life again

1578
01:35:52,712 --> 01:35:54,093
that I just stopped living.

1579
01:35:54,196 --> 01:35:56,198
Couldn't see the good
things in front of me.

1580
01:35:56,302 --> 01:35:59,788
I'm just so sorry I
didn't see you sooner.

1581
01:36:00,755 --> 01:36:02,480
I have a confession too.

1582
01:36:02,584 --> 01:36:06,484
See, I was really liking where
this new story of ours was headed.

1583
01:36:06,588 --> 01:36:09,798
I just wanted to see how it
was gonna turn out, I guess.

1584
01:36:11,110 --> 01:36:13,664
The Adventures of Loretta and Alan.

1585
01:36:15,770 --> 01:36:17,702
No, it would need a
better title than that.

1586
01:36:17,806 --> 01:36:19,774
Yeah, definitely. Definitely.

1587
01:36:20,913 --> 01:36:24,709
Sorry. Just... Taha's
femur is poking me.

1588
01:36:28,403 --> 01:36:30,163
Rafi must have left that.

1589
01:36:30,267 --> 01:36:32,787
How do you forget your
crowbar? It's gonna help us escape.

1590
01:36:32,890 --> 01:36:34,512
No, he left it on purpose.

1591
01:36:34,616 --> 01:36:36,307
Oh, cool. I always liked him.

1592
01:36:36,411 --> 01:36:37,826
- One...
- Okay.

1593
01:36:37,930 --> 01:36:39,759
- ...two, three!
- Okay.

1594
01:36:39,863 --> 01:36:43,798
I would've preferred him to not leave
us here in the first place, but...

1595
01:36:44,488 --> 01:36:45,316
Okay.

1596
01:37:06,372 --> 01:37:08,581
Dulcius ex asperis.

1597
01:37:12,930 --> 01:37:14,829
Sweeter after difficulty.

1598
01:37:21,456 --> 01:37:22,906
Go up! Run for the trees!

1599
01:37:24,114 --> 01:37:27,013
Wait. Nope. Never
mind. Trees are on fire.

1600
01:37:27,462 --> 01:37:29,153
Okay.

1601
01:37:30,741 --> 01:37:32,605
We can go back through the tunnel.

1602
01:37:33,571 --> 01:37:34,849
Nope. Tunnel's a no-go.

1603
01:37:39,957 --> 01:37:41,925
Um, okay. I'm open to other ideas.

1604
01:37:42,028 --> 01:37:45,583
There's a current. We
can follow it into the ocean.

1605
01:37:45,687 --> 01:37:47,309
How do we know
what's on the other side?

1606
01:37:47,827 --> 01:37:48,897
We don't.

1607
01:37:50,726 --> 01:37:52,867
There's only one way to find out.

1608
01:37:54,420 --> 01:37:56,077
- Worth the rash.
- Yeah?

1609
01:38:17,063 --> 01:38:18,064
Alan?

1610
01:38:26,521 --> 01:38:27,763
Alan!

1611
01:39:05,215 --> 01:39:06,216
Alan?

1612
01:39:06,319 --> 01:39:09,012
A... Alan?

1613
01:39:10,220 --> 01:39:11,221
Alan!

1614
01:39:14,500 --> 01:39:16,226
Oh, my God! You're alive!

1615
01:39:16,329 --> 01:39:18,573
- I'm alive.
- Oh, my God. I thought I killed you.

1616
01:39:21,541 --> 01:39:22,508
Is that Beth?

1617
01:39:22,611 --> 01:39:23,854
Loretta!

1618
01:39:24,475 --> 01:39:25,649
Beth!

1619
01:39:25,752 --> 01:39:27,409
Beth! Beth!

1620
01:39:27,513 --> 01:39:28,755
Beth!

1621
01:39:34,416 --> 01:39:35,797
Beth, you're here!

1622
01:39:36,453 --> 01:39:37,661
Why are you here?

1623
01:39:37,764 --> 01:39:40,560
I told you I got your back, girl!

1624
01:39:41,147 --> 01:39:42,942
I'm so sorry!

1625
01:39:43,046 --> 01:39:45,151
I destroyed the jumpsuit!

1626
01:39:45,600 --> 01:39:46,601
What?

1627
01:39:46,704 --> 01:39:49,224
Never mind! Later.

1628
01:39:49,328 --> 01:39:51,330
I found a British guy in a cave.

1629
01:39:51,433 --> 01:39:53,918
I thought he was a little
boy, but he has a full beard.

1630
01:39:54,022 --> 01:39:57,301
Beth, that's Fairfax! He kidnapped us!

1631
01:39:57,405 --> 01:40:00,166
He's a bad guy, Beth!
He killed my trainer!

1632
01:40:00,270 --> 01:40:01,271
Get him!

1633
01:40:01,788 --> 01:40:02,962
Stop him!

1634
01:40:10,797 --> 01:40:13,007
I got your back, girl.

1635
01:40:15,147 --> 01:40:17,114
Where were you running? It's a boat.

1636
01:40:17,218 --> 01:40:18,736
This guy's hilarious.

1637
01:40:18,840 --> 01:40:20,566
Got you.

1638
01:40:20,669 --> 01:40:21,946
Swim over to the rock!

1639
01:40:22,050 --> 01:40:24,121
- I don't got you. No, I got you.
- I got you.

1640
01:40:24,225 --> 01:40:26,123
We're gonna get you.
It's gonna be okay.

1641
01:40:26,227 --> 01:40:28,815
<i>"Finding refuge on a nearby rock,</i>

1642
01:40:28,919 --> 01:40:31,025
<i>he lifted her from the water,</i>

1643
01:40:31,128 --> 01:40:34,304
<i>his powerful arms
pulling her body close.</i>

1644
01:40:34,407 --> 01:40:35,546
<i>Alan whispered..."</i>

1645
01:40:35,650 --> 01:40:38,204
<i>Shh. You're safe now.</i>

1646
01:40:40,620 --> 01:40:45,280
<i>"In that moment, Loretta could feel
a new adventure was just beginning."</i>

1647
01:40:46,557 --> 01:40:49,215
"The heart-pounding passion
of the narrow escape

1648
01:40:49,319 --> 01:40:52,253
only inflamed Loretta's desire for him.

1649
01:40:52,356 --> 01:40:56,567
She was thirsty for the hot lava
soon to be pulsing from his..."

1650
01:40:56,671 --> 01:41:00,261
Don't you go stopping
right at the good part.

1651
01:41:01,607 --> 01:41:03,436
It's nothing she hasn't read before.

1652
01:41:03,540 --> 01:41:04,920
Didn't I tell you?

1653
01:41:05,024 --> 01:41:08,027
The most beautiful beach in the world.

1654
01:41:08,131 --> 01:41:11,444
Maybe later, I'll show you
the Cove of Enchantment?

1655
01:41:11,548 --> 01:41:13,136
No, you can take Randy.

1656
01:41:13,239 --> 01:41:16,898
Remember, you are
my platonic man friend.

1657
01:41:17,001 --> 01:41:20,039
Platonic? I like the sound of that.

1658
01:41:20,143 --> 01:41:22,800
Not sure what it means,
but I like the sound of it.

1659
01:41:22,904 --> 01:41:25,113
Here you go, Randy.

1660
01:41:26,873 --> 01:41:29,186
- My dear.
- You are an angel. Thank you.

1661
01:41:29,842 --> 01:41:31,257
How did you know?

1662
01:41:43,166 --> 01:41:45,961
- Nice way to end a book tour, right?
- Mm-hmm.

1663
01:41:46,514 --> 01:41:48,343
Um...

1664
01:41:48,447 --> 01:41:52,692
You know, I have a phrase I like to
use in moments like these, actually.

1665
01:41:52,796 --> 01:41:54,038
Um...

1666
01:41:55,523 --> 01:41:56,938
Quid deinde?

1667
01:41:58,077 --> 01:42:01,253
It's Latin. It means,
uh, "What's next?"

1668
01:42:03,151 --> 01:42:04,670
Quid cogitas?

1669
01:42:04,773 --> 01:42:06,154
Mmm.

1670
01:42:06,879 --> 01:42:08,052
Buca di Beppo.

1671
01:42:11,470 --> 01:42:13,127
- Yeah. I know zero other Latin.
- No. Yes.

1672
01:42:13,230 --> 01:42:16,164
I looked it up for this
moment right now.

1673
01:42:16,992 --> 01:42:19,133
So, what does come next?

1674
01:42:19,236 --> 01:42:21,721
- How would you write this?
- I don't know.

1675
01:42:21,825 --> 01:42:24,379
- How would you write it?
- Do we really want me to write this?

1676
01:42:24,483 --> 01:42:26,830
- Just try. Take a stab at it.
- Okay. I'll write it.

1677
01:42:26,933 --> 01:42:28,280
Okay.

1678
01:42:28,383 --> 01:42:31,386
"We were... They were,
uh... standing on a beach."

1679
01:42:31,490 --> 01:42:33,423
Sets the stage for the audience.
They know where we are.

1680
01:42:33,526 --> 01:42:35,321
You're already laughing.
Why are you laughing at me?

1681
01:42:35,425 --> 01:42:37,220
- I'm not laughing. I'm smiling.
- You are.

1682
01:42:37,323 --> 01:42:41,327
"There are palm trees above a brown

1683
01:42:42,190 --> 01:42:44,813
bark-like hair of the maiden.

1684
01:42:44,917 --> 01:42:46,781
"There is a dead jellyfish..."

1685
01:42:46,884 --> 01:42:49,335
All you're doing is describing what
you're actually seeing right now.

1686
01:42:49,439 --> 01:42:52,269
"He's nervous because
he really likes her."

1687
01:42:53,132 --> 01:42:55,169
It's nice writing.

1688
01:42:55,272 --> 01:42:56,584
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.

1689
01:42:56,687 --> 01:42:57,792
I'll keep going.

1690
01:42:57,895 --> 01:42:59,483
"He looked deep in her eyes."

1691
01:42:59,587 --> 01:43:03,038
The only thing that could compare
to the pulse of that ocean

1692
01:43:03,832 --> 01:43:04,902
"was the throbbing in the..."

1693
01:43:05,006 --> 01:43:08,112
- Okay, no, you can't throb.
- Why not?

1694
01:43:08,216 --> 01:43:09,942
Can't come out of
the gate with a throb.

1695
01:43:10,045 --> 01:43:12,358
- You throb all the time.
- I don't come out of the gate with it.

1696
01:43:12,462 --> 01:43:14,360
- You have to earn the throb.
- Who made you the queen of throb?

1697
01:43:14,464 --> 01:43:18,157
It's usually a chapter four thing. You
want it brought up appropriately in four.

1698
01:43:18,261 --> 01:43:20,366
I think you throb in all
the chapters. "Pulsating."

1699
01:43:20,470 --> 01:43:22,403
It's a precursor to throb.

1700
01:43:22,506 --> 01:43:24,612
- "Undulating."
- You just jumped to five.

1701
01:43:24,715 --> 01:43:27,580
- How 'bout they just kiss? Why not?
- Just like a regular kiss?

1702
01:43:27,684 --> 01:43:29,548
Yeah. Like a
beginning-of-the-chapter kiss.

1703
01:43:29,651 --> 01:43:31,239
I'm good at starting...

1704
01:43:35,105 --> 01:43:36,589
How was that? Any notes?

1705
01:43:37,349 --> 01:43:40,731
Very good first chapter attempt.

1706
01:45:05,989 --> 01:45:07,473
Psst!

1707
01:45:08,129 --> 01:45:09,613
Psst.

1708
01:45:10,580 --> 01:45:11,581
Psst.

1709
01:45:13,652 --> 01:45:14,618
Mother...

1710
01:45:14,722 --> 01:45:16,448
You were dead.

1711
01:45:16,551 --> 01:45:19,416
Your brains came out of your
face and hit the back of my throat.

1712
01:45:19,520 --> 01:45:22,074
- He was in my mouth.
- Don't say he was in your mouth.

1713
01:45:22,177 --> 01:45:23,800
- I could taste you.
- Don't ever say that.

1714
01:45:23,903 --> 01:45:29,081
We only use 10% of our brain,
so I just switched to another 10%.

1715
01:45:29,184 --> 01:45:32,015
So, you're okay?

1716
01:45:32,118 --> 01:45:33,810
One hundred percent.

1717
01:45:33,913 --> 01:45:35,398
Meaning 10%.

1718
01:45:35,501 --> 01:45:37,261
We thought you were dead.

1719
01:45:37,365 --> 01:45:40,092
Naturally, I have some anger
issues I need to let go of.

1720
01:45:40,195 --> 01:45:42,543
- Of course.
- And resentment.

1721
01:45:44,441 --> 01:45:45,787
So good to see you, man.

1722
01:45:45,891 --> 01:45:47,962
Okay, let's keep the chatter down.

1723
01:45:48,065 --> 01:45:52,449
We're closing our eyes and
reconnecting to our breath.

1724
01:45:53,519 --> 01:45:54,624
Great.

1725
01:45:55,452 --> 01:45:56,453
Great.