1
00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,000
Right, Orridge,

2
00:02:27,542 --> 00:02:29,667
Popple! Potel!

3
00:02:30,668 --> 00:02:31,668
9:20!

4
00:02:37,711 --> 00:02:41,046
...cannot but feel deeply humbled.

5
00:02:41,213 --> 00:02:43,763
Five years ago, if I may be
personal for a moment...

6
00:02:43,838 --> 00:02:45,922
a rather overawed headmaster

7
00:02:46,131 --> 00:02:50,256
of a rather obscure, maintained
comprehensive school...

8
00:02:52,757 --> 00:02:53,841
Stimpson.

9
00:02:54,092 --> 00:02:57,925
Can you make 3:30 Monday
or 4:30 Tuesday?

10
00:02:59,051 --> 00:03:01,843
No, 10:35 on Thursday

11
00:03:02,052 --> 00:03:04,552
or 12:10 Friday.

12
00:03:05,385 --> 00:03:06,585
Ah, can't do I'm afraid.

13
00:03:08,845 --> 00:03:12,846
Or we could say 11:10 Friday week.

14
00:03:13,055 --> 00:03:15,347
That's fine for me, whatever suits you.

15
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:16,680
Don't run!

16
00:03:17,556 --> 00:03:18,973
Sharon Seeds...

17
00:03:19,264 --> 00:03:20,349
9:20!

18
00:03:24,392 --> 00:03:26,974
...arrived at the annual meeting
for the first time,

19
00:03:27,184 --> 00:03:29,601
amazed to find himself invited

20
00:03:29,767 --> 00:03:34,352
to become one of your very select
handful of additional members.

21
00:03:34,602 --> 00:03:35,602
Come in!

22
00:03:35,852 --> 00:03:39,728
He listened to the headmasters of schools
with great and glorious names...

23
00:03:39,853 --> 00:03:42,854
Come in... great and glorious names...

24
00:03:43,021 --> 00:03:43,813
Headmaster...

25
00:03:43,979 --> 00:03:46,648
Eton and Harrow, Winchester
and Westminster.

26
00:03:46,855 --> 00:03:48,481
Am I taking 4H in G3

27
00:03:48,690 --> 00:03:49,856
at 10:30?

28
00:03:50,065 --> 00:03:53,066
...as they expatiated upon
a variety of weighty matters,

29
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,733
scarcely did our nervous new boy...

30
00:03:55,899 --> 00:03:57,025
open his mouth.

31
00:03:57,441 --> 00:03:59,126
Sorry. This is your thing
with all the posh schools?

32
00:03:59,150 --> 00:04:00,859
4H in G3 at 10:30.

33
00:04:01,026 --> 00:04:02,193
2:15 okay Brian?

34
00:04:02,402 --> 00:04:04,319
Joan said that I'm taking 4H in G3

35
00:04:04,527 --> 00:04:05,736
at 10:30.

36
00:04:06,403 --> 00:04:08,444
I thought I was taking
4J in J3 at 11.00!

37
00:04:08,695 --> 00:04:11,405
Peter Styles is taking 4H in G3
at 10:30.

38
00:04:11,737 --> 00:04:12,779
Right Ted, 2:15.

39
00:04:12,987 --> 00:04:14,687
Slay 'em at the conference, Brian.

40
00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:16,381
Tell all those upper-class ponces

41
00:04:16,405 --> 00:04:18,298
we're gonna hang 'em from the lamp post

42
00:04:18,322 --> 00:04:19,989
by their old school ties!

43
00:04:20,365 --> 00:04:21,415
Right, thank you Ted!

44
00:04:22,323 --> 00:04:25,282
Ah, you're taking 4G in H3
at 10:35.

45
00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:26,700
Oh, God!

46
00:04:28,450 --> 00:04:31,283
They should try having 4G
at Harrow!

47
00:04:32,201 --> 00:04:36,619
Well, that obscure comprehensive school
was none other...

48
00:04:36,827 --> 00:04:39,829
than Thomas Tompion.

49
00:04:43,621 --> 00:04:47,580
And that overawed new boy
was none other than me.

50
00:04:47,830 --> 00:04:49,331
Little did he dream,

51
00:04:49,540 --> 00:04:52,832
within a few short years he would
be standing up here himself

52
00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:57,290
as the very first comprehensive school
headmaster ever...

53
00:04:59,001 --> 00:05:02,335
to become Chairman of
the Headmasters' Conference.

54
00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:04,085
Clint...

55
00:05:05,043 --> 00:05:07,419
Where do you think
you're going, Clint?

56
00:05:07,628 --> 00:05:09,128
The Guinness Book of Records?

57
00:05:10,004 --> 00:05:12,421
Every day this term so far,
isn't it Clint?

58
00:05:14,171 --> 00:05:16,754
Well don't just stand there, Clint!
Run!

59
00:05:20,881 --> 00:05:22,424
9:20, Clint.

60
00:05:24,132 --> 00:05:25,682
And come out from that doorway!

61
00:05:26,008 --> 00:05:27,967
Not you... you!

62
00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:30,842
Yes you, I can see the smoke you fool.

63
00:05:31,050 --> 00:05:32,634
I can see your feet!

64
00:05:35,927 --> 00:05:36,927
Oh, it's you!

65
00:06:18,439 --> 00:06:21,314
Right, now I've got some sad
news for you all...

66
00:06:22,981 --> 00:06:24,441
I'm going to be away today.

67
00:06:25,691 --> 00:06:27,091
I knew you'd be heartbroken!

68
00:06:28,941 --> 00:06:30,734
Right. Now where am I going?

69
00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:35,610
To the University of Norwich
in the fair county of Norfolk.

70
00:06:35,776 --> 00:06:37,319
And why am I going there?

71
00:06:37,819 --> 00:06:41,069
Because that's where this
year's annual meeting

72
00:06:41,278 --> 00:06:43,862
of the Headmasters' Conference
is being held,

73
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:47,362
and you can all feel rather
proud of yourselves.

74
00:06:49,238 --> 00:06:53,799
Because they don't let just any old
headmasters into the Headmaster's
Conference, far from it...

75
00:06:53,823 --> 00:06:58,158
The Headmaster's Conference is
the organization to which

76
00:06:58,366 --> 00:07:01,759
all the great independent
schools of this country belong,
places like Eton and Harrow,

77
00:07:01,783 --> 00:07:04,243
Winchester and Westminster.

78
00:07:04,493 --> 00:07:07,161
The fee-paying schools.

79
00:07:07,577 --> 00:07:10,536
The 'posh' schools that we
all look down our noses at,

80
00:07:10,994 --> 00:07:12,894
and that we'd all send our children to

81
00:07:13,329 --> 00:07:14,871
if only we'd got the money.

82
00:07:18,580 --> 00:07:21,973
They don't usually let in headmasters of
common old garden comprehensive schools,

83
00:07:21,997 --> 00:07:23,915
of schools like this one.

84
00:07:24,123 --> 00:07:27,665
So, why you ask, why did they
let me in?

85
00:07:27,875 --> 00:07:29,559
Well, I'll tell you why.
They let me in

86
00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:31,042
because you and I,

87
00:07:32,375 --> 00:07:33,459
all of us together,

88
00:07:34,293 --> 00:07:38,044
have made Thomas Tompion one of
the best schools in the country.

89
00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:44,086
Right then. But today...

90
00:07:44,921 --> 00:07:45,921
9:20, Linda...

91
00:07:46,629 --> 00:07:47,629
But today is

92
00:07:47,713 --> 00:07:51,589
an extra special occasion,
because today

93
00:07:51,964 --> 00:07:55,673
today I take over as Chairman,

94
00:07:55,965 --> 00:07:58,758
Chairman of the Headmasters' Conference,

95
00:07:58,966 --> 00:08:00,609
and I shall be the first chairman

96
00:08:00,633 --> 00:08:03,717
in the whole of history,
in the whole of history

97
00:08:04,885 --> 00:08:09,053
who is headmaster of an ordinary, common
old garden state comprehensive school.

98
00:08:09,260 --> 00:08:12,261
So it really is one for the
Guinness Book of Records!

99
00:08:13,053 --> 00:08:16,405
Right then! So what am I going to
tell them in my speech this afternoon?

100
00:08:16,429 --> 00:08:19,222
I'm going to tell them how
we did it!

101
00:08:19,430 --> 00:08:21,239
I'm going to tell them how we all decided

102
00:08:21,263 --> 00:08:23,681
that we wanted a well-run,
orderly school...

103
00:08:24,598 --> 00:08:29,016
a school where we all knew what we were
supposed to be doing, Jimmy Picken,

104
00:08:31,059 --> 00:08:34,451
a school where we all knew which room
we were supposed to be doing it in.

105
00:08:34,475 --> 00:08:36,375
I'm not looking at you, Wendy Pilbrow,

106
00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:39,235
or you, Gary Bottoms.

107
00:08:40,936 --> 00:08:44,036
...and what we were supposed to be doing
it with, Debbie Jones.

108
00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:47,979
And above all,

109
00:08:48,188 --> 00:08:50,730
Clint Ailing and Dean Schreiber,
please note...

110
00:08:55,898 --> 00:08:57,698
when we were supposed to be
doing it!

111
00:09:01,608 --> 00:09:02,733
Right...

112
00:09:02,942 --> 00:09:04,067
Hymn 122:

113
00:09:04,234 --> 00:09:07,026
"He Who Would Valiant Be".

114
00:10:16,921 --> 00:10:18,754
You're here again, Gayle?

115
00:10:22,214 --> 00:10:23,713
What are you here for, Shaun?

116
00:10:23,922 --> 00:10:25,440
Don't know. What are you here for?

117
00:10:25,464 --> 00:10:28,006
Oh, I'm... I'm merely...
I'm just...

118
00:10:41,989 --> 00:10:44,906
Hello, Mrs Stimpson.

119
00:10:46,574 --> 00:10:50,075
Surprised to find you lined up
with the...

120
00:10:50,596 --> 00:10:52,305
What have you been...?

121
00:10:52,471 --> 00:10:53,596
What?

122
00:10:53,806 --> 00:10:56,181
Did you over-cook the...?

123
00:10:56,389 --> 00:10:58,139
Or were you late getting
him his...?

124
00:11:03,142 --> 00:11:04,492
Go on, hit 'im in the face!

125
00:11:06,934 --> 00:11:09,810
If you think 9:20 outside
my study means

126
00:11:10,059 --> 00:11:13,359
11:10 in the playground, then you'll
be back here at 9:20 every day

127
00:11:13,394 --> 00:11:15,477
until you learn to tell the time!

128
00:11:15,728 --> 00:11:19,146
I told you 9:50; the train's
not till 10:25.

129
00:11:19,688 --> 00:11:20,479
What do you want?

130
00:11:20,688 --> 00:11:22,747
Please sir, it's about
starting Greek, sir.

131
00:11:22,771 --> 00:11:24,564
9:20's not starting Greek.

132
00:11:24,731 --> 00:11:27,523
9:20's not being driven
to the railway station.

133
00:11:27,689 --> 00:11:28,689
What's 9:20?

134
00:11:28,857 --> 00:11:29,982
Executions, sir.

135
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,441
Executions. Mr Jolly?

136
00:11:34,483 --> 00:11:36,984
I used to be like you.
Always late.

137
00:11:38,151 --> 00:11:41,444
Oh yes, forever in the wrong place
at the wrong time.

138
00:11:41,860 --> 00:11:45,361
I know what you mean, but I just
thought I ought to...

139
00:11:46,611 --> 00:11:47,737
I thought I ought to

140
00:11:48,362 --> 00:11:49,779
One or two things...

141
00:11:49,987 --> 00:11:52,280
One or two problems...

142
00:11:52,947 --> 00:11:54,072
One or two personal...

143
00:11:54,530 --> 00:11:56,156
I was like some miserable child

144
00:11:56,364 --> 00:11:59,174
wandering round the school,
with his calculator in one hand

145
00:11:59,198 --> 00:12:02,241
and his gym shoes in the other,
and not the slightest idea

146
00:12:02,449 --> 00:12:03,908
where he's supposed to be.

147
00:12:05,241 --> 00:12:06,366
G3, Leroy!

148
00:12:08,409 --> 00:12:09,409
I know the feeling.

149
00:12:09,618 --> 00:12:10,802
We all go through it, John.

150
00:12:10,826 --> 00:12:12,119
We all get lost.

151
00:12:13,536 --> 00:12:15,661
I'm afraid I've got into...

152
00:12:19,037 --> 00:12:20,121
Bed, John.

153
00:12:21,038 --> 00:12:23,787
Oh no, no, no. Nothing like that!
Well...

154
00:12:25,872 --> 00:12:28,072
Try getting out of it earlier
in the morning.

155
00:12:30,457 --> 00:12:31,657
But the thing is this...

156
00:12:32,041 --> 00:12:36,417
Because the first step to knowing who
we are, is knowing where we are,

157
00:12:36,583 --> 00:12:38,917
and when we are!

158
00:12:51,462 --> 00:12:52,879
I could drive you there.

159
00:12:53,088 --> 00:12:55,589
The train doesn't go till 10:25.

160
00:12:55,796 --> 00:12:57,232
You're ashamed of me,
aren't you?

161
00:12:57,256 --> 00:12:58,956
You could go over to the hospital.

162
00:12:59,422 --> 00:13:04,050
Don't tell me you're not
allowed to take wives, because
if you're the chairman, you are.

163
00:13:04,633 --> 00:13:05,758
I know that.

164
00:13:20,888 --> 00:13:23,588
You could take some of your old
ladies out for a drive.

165
00:13:24,388 --> 00:13:28,556
I don't have to come to the dinner
if that's what you're worrying about.

166
00:13:29,723 --> 00:13:32,974
I could go out and get a
hamburger on my own.

167
00:13:39,767 --> 00:13:42,018
This is a historic moment.

168
00:13:42,226 --> 00:13:45,144
I stand before you today as
your new chairman.

169
00:13:45,352 --> 00:13:48,645
I said I could go out and get a
hamburger in McDonald's.

170
00:13:48,853 --> 00:13:52,730
Good, good. And did Paul get off
to school on time?

171
00:14:07,274 --> 00:14:09,824
- Right. So you'll
find somewhere to
park... - Park?

172
00:14:10,609 --> 00:14:12,442
Make sure the train's running.

173
00:14:12,609 --> 00:14:14,759
If it's not, you'll have to drive me there.

174
00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,404
Platform 3,

175
00:14:23,570 --> 00:14:26,113
10:25 to Norwich. Calling passengers...

176
00:14:35,866 --> 00:14:38,866
Right, Norwich. We're on
time today, are we?

177
00:14:39,033 --> 00:14:40,033
On the left.

178
00:14:40,116 --> 00:14:41,116
Right...

179
00:14:42,201 --> 00:14:43,594
On the left, governor.
Train on the left.

180
00:14:43,618 --> 00:14:45,661
Glen Scully and Mandy Kostakis!

181
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:55,663
Yes!... Right.

182
00:14:56,663 --> 00:14:57,663
Tomorrow then.

183
00:14:57,914 --> 00:14:59,039
9:20!

184
00:15:03,582 --> 00:15:04,623
Right!

185
00:15:04,791 --> 00:15:06,124
On the left, then.

186
00:15:06,290 --> 00:15:07,083
Right.

187
00:15:07,291 --> 00:15:08,875
- Right?
- Right.

188
00:15:25,921 --> 00:15:29,631
This is a historic moment.

189
00:15:30,172 --> 00:15:32,757
I stand before you today

190
00:15:32,923 --> 00:15:34,715
as your new chairman,

191
00:15:35,007 --> 00:15:37,383
something that few of us

192
00:15:37,550 --> 00:15:40,883
ever expected to see happen
in our lifetime.

193
00:15:53,136 --> 00:15:56,972
Something that few of us expected to see
in our lifetime.

194
00:16:05,723 --> 00:16:07,223
This is the train for Norwich?

195
00:16:07,683 --> 00:16:08,783
- Plymouth.
- Plymouth?

196
00:16:09,599 --> 00:16:11,049
That was Norwich on the left.

197
00:16:20,395 --> 00:16:21,727
Wait! Stop!

198
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:31,605
Right!

199
00:16:33,523 --> 00:16:35,023
The 10:25 to Norwich?

200
00:16:35,232 --> 00:16:37,083
- You've missed it.
- It's on time? It is running?

201
00:16:37,107 --> 00:16:39,191
It's run, it's gone, that's it.

202
00:16:39,358 --> 00:16:40,358
That's alright then.

203
00:16:43,380 --> 00:16:44,838
Gwenda!

204
00:16:48,735 --> 00:16:51,088
Can't you tell the difference
between left and right?

205
00:16:51,112 --> 00:16:52,528
You said Norwich...

206
00:16:52,695 --> 00:16:54,155
That's Plymouth!

207
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:55,520
You didn't want Norwich?

208
00:16:57,988 --> 00:16:58,780
The speech!

209
00:16:58,988 --> 00:17:00,864
Speech? What, now?

210
00:17:02,948 --> 00:17:04,865
Wait! Stop!

211
00:17:05,948 --> 00:17:08,759
They've asked me to do some damned
silly things as I've stood 'ere,

212
00:17:08,783 --> 00:17:11,283
but no one's ever asked me to
make a speech before.

213
00:17:12,242 --> 00:17:14,159
Come on! Try this one then.

214
00:17:14,368 --> 00:17:15,743
Plymouth, this one.

215
00:17:17,076 --> 00:17:18,411
The speech...

216
00:17:19,494 --> 00:17:21,661
Please, could you give me
the speech?

217
00:17:30,414 --> 00:17:31,497
Right!

218
00:17:32,039 --> 00:17:33,165
He's back.

219
00:17:33,914 --> 00:17:35,964
You want the speech before
you go, do you?

220
00:17:36,415 --> 00:17:38,248
"My lords, ladies and gentlemen..."

221
00:17:38,915 --> 00:17:40,115
The next one to Norwich?

222
00:17:40,332 --> 00:17:42,792
- 2:47, change at Peterborough.
- Oh!

223
00:17:44,876 --> 00:17:46,084
He didn't like it.

224
00:17:49,002 --> 00:17:50,002
Gwenda!

225
00:17:59,005 --> 00:18:02,172
Gwenda, wait!

226
00:18:17,676 --> 00:18:21,226
Keep going, governor; it's never
too late till the last moment's come...

227
00:18:22,178 --> 00:18:23,636
just so long...

228
00:18:23,886 --> 00:18:26,679
just so long as your wife
hasn't taken the car!

229
00:18:45,848 --> 00:18:47,619
Gwenda!

230
00:18:53,561 --> 00:18:55,645
Where the hell is she?

231
00:18:56,103 --> 00:18:57,553
Oh, you're here. Where's Mum?

232
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:01,220
- Don't tell me at the school.
- Yeah, I think she's...

233
00:19:01,271 --> 00:19:05,499
I know she was at the school,
you idiot. Where'd she go after
that? Don't say the station!

234
00:19:05,523 --> 00:19:06,773
Yeah, I think she said...

235
00:19:06,856 --> 00:19:08,648
God, give me strength!

236
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,192
But where is she now?

237
00:19:19,610 --> 00:19:20,774
She's not at the hospital? She's not...

238
00:19:20,798 --> 00:19:23,754
...driving old ladies
around the countryside? -
Dunno, she might have said...

239
00:19:23,778 --> 00:19:25,236
She's at the hospital!

240
00:19:30,780 --> 00:19:32,030
Why aren't you at school?

241
00:19:32,802 --> 00:19:34,260
- Ah, well, I've got a...

242
00:19:34,323 --> 00:19:37,403
You've got a free, of course you've
got a free. Only you haven't got a free...

243
00:19:37,427 --> 00:19:40,823
- No, I've got a...
- You've got a study period!

244
00:19:43,283 --> 00:19:45,326
I've got a hangover!

245
00:19:49,390 --> 00:19:51,473
Taxi, taxi, taxi!

246
00:20:18,501 --> 00:20:21,377
Please sir, I'm terribly sorry Mr Stimpson.

247
00:20:21,585 --> 00:20:22,835
Laura?

248
00:20:26,003 --> 00:20:28,253
I'm sorry, Mr Stimpson,
I've got a free...

249
00:20:28,587 --> 00:20:30,296
Right! Laura, hospital.

250
00:20:48,550 --> 00:20:49,718
Right...

251
00:20:49,885 --> 00:20:51,260
Not far out of your way.

252
00:20:51,803 --> 00:20:54,719
It's not a free, Laura, it's a
study period.

253
00:20:54,928 --> 00:20:57,636
Study periods are not frees.

254
00:20:58,971 --> 00:21:00,614
This is your parents' car,
is it Laura?

255
00:21:00,638 --> 00:21:02,264
They don't mind.

256
00:21:02,596 --> 00:21:07,282
You've got A levels this year, Laura,
you shouldn't be driving around in
study periods; you're a prefect.

257
00:21:07,306 --> 00:21:08,956
You should be setting an example.

258
00:21:09,057 --> 00:21:11,099
Right... Left!

259
00:21:21,936 --> 00:21:24,185
Right, wait here.

260
00:21:25,435 --> 00:21:27,662
Do you mind waiting? I don't know
where she goes.

261
00:21:27,686 --> 00:21:29,938
I'm only missing biology.

262
00:21:45,899 --> 00:21:47,317
Mind the step.

263
00:21:49,151 --> 00:21:50,317
So, she said:

264
00:21:50,527 --> 00:21:55,235
"Elly, it's no use letting Lou have the
sherry glasses...

265
00:21:55,652 --> 00:21:59,153
"She won't appreciate them,
she won't polish them...

266
00:21:59,695 --> 00:22:02,421
"You know what she's like." So I said:
"Well, all right...

267
00:22:02,445 --> 00:22:06,145
"I've no desire to burden people with
possessions they don't want," I said.

268
00:22:06,363 --> 00:22:08,563
"That's not my intention and
never has been."

269
00:22:09,073 --> 00:22:13,116
So naturally, she thought that if
the sherry glasses aren't going to Lou,

270
00:22:13,283 --> 00:22:14,991
they'd be going to Pam.

271
00:22:15,284 --> 00:22:16,992
But I thought to myself:

272
00:22:17,450 --> 00:22:18,909
"Wait a moment, Elly..."

273
00:22:19,117 --> 00:22:21,410
Keep moving Mrs Trellis,
nearly there.

274
00:22:21,618 --> 00:22:23,785
"Hold on a moment, Elly," I thought.

275
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:25,786
Are we going to the hospital?

276
00:22:25,952 --> 00:22:27,661
We're at the hospital, Mrs Wheel.

277
00:22:28,120 --> 00:22:30,954
We're just going to have a
little look at the country.

278
00:22:31,162 --> 00:22:33,454
How lovely? Ooh, isn't that lovely?

279
00:22:33,663 --> 00:22:35,955
"Not so fast, Elly," I thought.

280
00:22:36,205 --> 00:22:39,205
"If Pam gets them, she'll give them
to Babs...,

281
00:22:39,540 --> 00:22:41,832
"and we all know what she'll do
with them."

282
00:22:42,248 --> 00:22:43,874
Aren't we lucky!

283
00:22:44,250 --> 00:22:45,708
Are we going to the hospital?

284
00:22:45,916 --> 00:22:48,917
Don't worry, Mrs Wheel.

285
00:22:49,167 --> 00:22:52,270
We'll come back to the hospital after
we've had a little look at the countryside.

286
00:22:52,294 --> 00:22:54,544
And then I thought:
"Well, hold on...

287
00:22:54,711 --> 00:22:56,460
"Millie's living in Majorca.

288
00:22:57,461 --> 00:23:00,879
"Well what on Earth is she going to do
with two dozen sherry glasses?

289
00:23:01,629 --> 00:23:06,338
But I thought: "Even if she wants them,
how should I get them to her?"

290
00:23:09,298 --> 00:23:10,965
Aren't we lucky people!

291
00:23:19,843 --> 00:23:21,634
Maybe I'm old-fashioned,

292
00:23:21,885 --> 00:23:24,802
maybe I don't understand
modern ideas about...

293
00:23:37,722 --> 00:23:39,722
We've missed her. She's gone!

294
00:23:47,057 --> 00:23:48,057
Which way then?

295
00:23:50,975 --> 00:23:52,994
Left or right, Mr Stimpson?

296
00:23:53,018 --> 00:23:57,145
Laura, Laura. Will you drive
me to Norwich?

297
00:23:57,436 --> 00:23:58,478
Okay. Where is it?

298
00:23:58,686 --> 00:24:02,621
It's vital, you see. I shouldn't
ask you otherwise. It's the
headmasters' conference.

299
00:24:02,645 --> 00:24:03,845
I'm the first headmaster

300
00:24:03,937 --> 00:24:07,622
of a maintained comprehensive school
ever, in the whole of history, to become

301
00:24:07,646 --> 00:24:09,646
Chairman of the Headmasters' Conference.

302
00:24:09,689 --> 00:24:11,789
- Just tell me where it is.
- It's not far.

303
00:24:13,106 --> 00:24:14,607
Not all that far.

304
00:24:15,232 --> 00:24:15,899
Not too far.

305
00:24:16,066 --> 00:24:17,066
Left or right?

306
00:24:17,734 --> 00:24:18,941
Oh, right...

307
00:24:19,442 --> 00:24:20,442
Left!

308
00:24:21,485 --> 00:24:23,318
No, no... right... right.

309
00:24:34,738 --> 00:24:36,613
- 163 miles...
- Right.

310
00:24:37,738 --> 00:24:39,198
We'll have to ring your mum.

311
00:24:39,530 --> 00:24:41,716
Ah. They've got a phone here.
I'd better speak to her myself.

312
00:24:41,740 --> 00:24:42,823
I'll do it.

313
00:24:43,491 --> 00:24:46,675
I mean, non if she's the slightest
bit worried about it, Laura...

314
00:24:46,699 --> 00:24:48,449
I'll pay for the petrol, of course.

315
00:25:00,745 --> 00:25:02,912
This is a historic moment.

316
00:25:04,037 --> 00:25:07,246
We are going a long way...
We have come a long way...

317
00:25:07,580 --> 00:25:09,705
We are going 163 miles...

318
00:25:10,955 --> 00:25:13,165
John, listen to me, I'm going away.

319
00:25:14,248 --> 00:25:15,248
It's over.

320
00:25:18,166 --> 00:25:19,208
No, Norwich.

321
00:25:19,416 --> 00:25:22,918
...if I may be personal for a moment.
I was feeling deeply historic...

322
00:25:24,293 --> 00:25:27,835
Five years ago, if I may be
historic for a moment...

323
00:25:28,169 --> 00:25:30,669
I was feeling deeply humble.

324
00:25:30,878 --> 00:25:35,254
An overawed master from an
obscure comprehensive school.

325
00:25:35,505 --> 00:25:38,606
Every time she comes to the house,
she makes some little remark...

326
00:25:38,630 --> 00:25:40,464
"Oh Elly," she goes,

327
00:25:40,714 --> 00:25:43,940
"it does take you ages to dust all your
glasses... I don't know how you do it.

328
00:25:43,964 --> 00:25:46,983
"I'm sure I shouldn't like to have
all those glasses to dust."

329
00:25:47,007 --> 00:25:49,633
She goes on and on about
those glasses, never stops.

330
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:52,194
I sometimes wonder if she ever
thinks about anything else.

331
00:25:52,218 --> 00:25:54,635
She certainly never talks about
anything else.

332
00:25:55,010 --> 00:25:56,676
Of course, I don't say a word.

333
00:25:58,928 --> 00:26:02,278
I'm not much of a talker. There's plenty
I could say if I wanted to.

334
00:26:02,345 --> 00:26:04,054
Well, like that clock...

335
00:26:04,970 --> 00:26:06,221
that came to her,

336
00:26:06,721 --> 00:26:08,263
not that she's ever wound it.

337
00:26:08,429 --> 00:26:11,639
Not that she's so much as looked
at it, from that day to this.

338
00:26:17,307 --> 00:26:18,450
Laura, what did she say?

339
00:26:18,474 --> 00:26:19,682
Oh, it's okay.

340
00:26:19,933 --> 00:26:25,202
...got rooms in that house so filled with
things that you can't open the door.
Doesn't know what she's got herself.

341
00:26:25,226 --> 00:26:28,026
I feel very badly about this Laura.
What are you missing?

342
00:26:28,560 --> 00:26:30,787
- You're missing double biology!
- I don't mind.

343
00:26:30,811 --> 00:26:34,661
You should mind. You've got A levels
and I'm taking you out of double biology.

344
00:26:35,853 --> 00:26:39,456
Laura, you're going to discover that life
is full of the most terrible moral choices.

345
00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:41,165
In fact I said to her the other day:

346
00:26:41,189 --> 00:26:43,739
I said, "you know what's going
to happen, don't you?

347
00:26:43,939 --> 00:26:48,607
"Someone's got to sort this lot
out when you've gone, and it
won't be Dibs, it won't be Lou...

348
00:26:48,816 --> 00:26:50,733
"oh dear, no, it'll be me!"

349
00:26:50,899 --> 00:26:54,949
But no one pays attention to what anyone
says; I don't know why I waste my breath.

350
00:26:55,652 --> 00:26:59,002
I can tell you she's got a clock in that
house that came from Mother

351
00:26:59,110 --> 00:27:01,403
that's worth every penny of �100.

352
00:27:01,569 --> 00:27:04,153
It's never been wound from
that day to this.

353
00:27:04,362 --> 00:27:05,588
So when she's in the house
the other day...

354
00:27:05,612 --> 00:27:08,738
That bloke with the doll, did they pay?

355
00:27:08,946 --> 00:27:10,674
They didn't pay!
They've never paid.

356
00:27:10,698 --> 00:27:11,823
Blue 1100, was it?

357
00:27:12,447 --> 00:27:16,657
Laura Wisely!
She lives round the corner.

358
00:27:16,824 --> 00:27:18,573
She's one of his pupils.

359
00:27:18,908 --> 00:27:20,324
How lovely!

360
00:27:21,158 --> 00:27:23,534
I saw the train leave.

361
00:27:23,992 --> 00:27:25,242
Isn't that lovely?

362
00:27:25,451 --> 00:27:27,201
The number! The number!

363
00:27:27,410 --> 00:27:29,610
I don't believe this;
there goes another one!

364
00:27:36,912 --> 00:27:39,037
Don't worry, it's okay. Honestly.

365
00:27:40,330 --> 00:27:44,164
If Thomas Tompion is a success story,
it is because we insist

366
00:27:44,373 --> 00:27:47,999
upon certain traditional standards.

367
00:27:48,249 --> 00:27:49,332
Speech.

368
00:27:49,916 --> 00:27:51,041
It's on the train.

369
00:27:55,126 --> 00:27:59,626
I should like at this point, if I may,
to pause for three hours

370
00:28:00,377 --> 00:28:03,794
160 miles in three hours...
to pause for

371
00:28:03,962 --> 00:28:05,336
say three-and-a-half hours

372
00:28:05,545 --> 00:28:08,087
three-and-a-half into 160...

373
00:28:08,254 --> 00:28:09,654
It's a good thing, actually.

374
00:28:09,838 --> 00:28:12,538
If you hadn't have come along,
I might not be here now.

375
00:28:13,464 --> 00:28:14,589
I had this great row

376
00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:15,840
with this bloke.

377
00:28:15,965 --> 00:28:19,066
I run back to the house and I saw the
car keys, and I thought, "Right!"

378
00:28:19,090 --> 00:28:22,490
We all understand, I think, that
lateness is a discourtesy to others.

379
00:28:24,133 --> 00:28:25,983
What is sometimes forgotten
these days

380
00:28:26,217 --> 00:28:29,218
is that it is three-and-a-half into 16

381
00:28:29,593 --> 00:28:31,177
It's about 50 miles an hour.

382
00:28:31,635 --> 00:28:35,029
He didn't like it when I told him
I was driving to Norwich with someone.

383
00:28:35,053 --> 00:28:35,761
"Who?" he said,

384
00:28:35,928 --> 00:28:37,345
"Who? Who?"

385
00:28:37,886 --> 00:28:38,929
He's so jealous.

386
00:28:39,388 --> 00:28:41,388
You told him you were driving
to Norwich?

387
00:28:42,722 --> 00:28:45,522
- You told who you were driving to Norwich?
- This bloke.

388
00:28:50,974 --> 00:28:53,017
I couldn't ring Mum; she'd
have gone mad.

389
00:28:53,182 --> 00:28:55,225
But we can't stop again.

390
00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:58,160
And I never paid for the petrol.

391
00:29:01,143 --> 00:29:02,269
Mrs Wisely?

392
00:29:02,436 --> 00:29:03,103
Police?

393
00:29:03,270 --> 00:29:04,770
No, Jolly. Mr Jolly.

394
00:29:05,228 --> 00:29:08,146
I just wondered if Laura was...
Are you Laura's... police?

395
00:29:09,938 --> 00:29:13,731
Laura's at school, dear. I'm on
the phone. The car's been stolen.

396
00:29:13,938 --> 00:29:15,606
No, it isn't the police.

397
00:29:17,064 --> 00:29:18,214
It's someone for Laura.

398
00:29:18,356 --> 00:29:20,156
It's my husband. He's
beside himself.

399
00:29:20,691 --> 00:29:24,042
Well you'll have to come back and
speak to them, give them a description.

400
00:29:24,066 --> 00:29:25,734
I can't give them a description.

401
00:29:26,025 --> 00:29:28,692
Is it a Morris or an 1100?
I don't know.

402
00:29:29,484 --> 00:29:33,234
He's in such a state he doesn't know what
he's doing. He lives for that car.

403
00:29:33,277 --> 00:29:36,077
If it's standing outside in the
drive, he goes to pieces.

404
00:29:36,194 --> 00:29:37,945
Is it the anti-nuclear, dear?

405
00:29:38,237 --> 00:29:40,946
No, no, it's just that
Laura's not at...

406
00:29:41,571 --> 00:29:44,197
I don't want to alarm
you, but just thought I...

407
00:29:44,448 --> 00:29:48,240
Laura. She's disappeared.
No one knows where she is.

408
00:29:49,656 --> 00:29:51,533
No, he's just said.

409
00:29:51,699 --> 00:29:53,742
He's here now. He's just told me.

410
00:29:54,325 --> 00:29:55,409
Who are you?

411
00:29:55,576 --> 00:29:59,343
- I am, well, I'm one of
the staff at the... - He's
one of the staff at the...

412
00:29:59,367 --> 00:30:00,467
You know, the music...

413
00:30:00,659 --> 00:30:01,702
He's the music.

414
00:30:06,162 --> 00:30:07,245
He's coming home.

415
00:30:07,537 --> 00:30:10,887
He doesn't know what he's doing.
He's going to do someone an injury.

416
00:30:11,495 --> 00:30:13,497
And you've no idea where she is?

417
00:30:13,705 --> 00:30:16,165
Well, does she have any relations...

418
00:30:16,331 --> 00:30:19,040
I just wondered if she had any sort of...

419
00:30:20,082 --> 00:30:21,123
well... in Norwich?

420
00:30:21,583 --> 00:30:23,979
- Is this the hospital?
- No!

421
00:30:24,583 --> 00:30:26,708
Just wait there. Don't move.

422
00:30:27,791 --> 00:30:29,391
Ooh, doesn't this make a change!

423
00:30:29,626 --> 00:30:32,835
No, it's not, it's Mrs... isn't it
Mrs Stimpson?

424
00:30:33,044 --> 00:30:34,344
I'm sorry, I just wondered

425
00:30:34,501 --> 00:30:35,836
Laura's disappeared!

426
00:30:36,003 --> 00:30:37,313
She didn't tell you she was going?

427
00:30:37,337 --> 00:30:39,187
Not a word, and the car's
been stolen!

428
00:30:39,295 --> 00:30:41,796
I'm so sorry, Mrs Wisely,
I'm so sorry...

429
00:30:41,962 --> 00:30:45,506
We're waiting for the police. My
husband's out of his mind with worry.

430
00:30:45,714 --> 00:30:46,714
He says...

431
00:30:47,714 --> 00:30:48,964
that she's in Norwich.

432
00:30:49,507 --> 00:30:53,407
I just somehow thought perhaps... Oh
hello, Mrs Stimpson. I just wondered if...

433
00:30:53,591 --> 00:30:55,883
Of course everyone
knows except me!

434
00:30:56,050 --> 00:30:57,902
Why Norwich? What could she
be doing in Norwich?

435
00:30:57,926 --> 00:31:00,026
I'll tell you what she's doing in Norwich.

436
00:31:00,092 --> 00:31:03,301
She's going to the annual meeting of
the Headmasters' Conference.

437
00:31:03,343 --> 00:31:04,594
- Oh no.
- You mean...?

438
00:31:04,761 --> 00:31:06,303
- Yes.
- You don't mean...?

439
00:31:06,512 --> 00:31:08,553
Of course, he wouldn't take me.

440
00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:12,138
I said I'd sit in the hotel, I'd
eat in McDonalds, but oh no,

441
00:31:12,304 --> 00:31:13,504
because he's taking her.

442
00:31:13,639 --> 00:31:16,365
She said it was cello, every
evening, I knew it wasn't cello!

443
00:31:16,389 --> 00:31:17,764
A schoolgirl, a child...

444
00:31:17,932 --> 00:31:19,264
She's got her A levels.

445
00:31:19,473 --> 00:31:22,390
Look! A little family party.
Isn't that nice!

446
00:31:22,557 --> 00:31:25,850
I think I'd better...
I think I must be...

447
00:31:26,308 --> 00:31:28,826
I haven't said anything about his
work, work, work...

448
00:31:28,850 --> 00:31:33,204
I haven't said anything about his
everlasting Conservative meetings, but
I'm not going to put up with this.

449
00:31:33,228 --> 00:31:35,435
Which one's the hospital?

450
00:31:37,145 --> 00:31:39,603
The hospital? I think it's
on the bypass

451
00:31:40,229 --> 00:31:41,604
Her father'll kill her.

452
00:31:41,854 --> 00:31:44,188
Can we see over the house?
Is it open today?

453
00:31:53,649 --> 00:31:54,857
Get in the car!

454
00:31:57,274 --> 00:31:59,150
I told you to stay in the car.

455
00:31:59,359 --> 00:32:00,484
What a day!

456
00:32:01,235 --> 00:32:04,047
- Where next?
- Norwich!

457
00:32:04,193 --> 00:32:07,003
So she said: "What happened
to Mother's blue tea counter?"

458
00:32:07,027 --> 00:32:08,546
And I said: "well, you're the
last person to ask..."

459
00:32:08,570 --> 00:32:09,670
Where's the other one?

460
00:32:11,113 --> 00:32:14,464
She's in Norwich, at a conference
of headmasters with the headmaster.

461
00:32:14,488 --> 00:32:18,090
His wife's beside herself, and what about
her A levels? We've got to find her, Ted.

462
00:32:18,114 --> 00:32:21,549
You've got to talk to her. Get the car out.
Oh, the car's been stolen.

463
00:32:21,573 --> 00:32:24,366
She's taken the car.
She can't drive.

464
00:32:28,242 --> 00:32:29,992
Mrs Wisely? Stolen car?

465
00:32:30,451 --> 00:32:33,326
- There! There.
- There.

466
00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:34,785
Here.

467
00:32:46,538 --> 00:32:48,747
Now keep calm. Don't go mad.

468
00:32:49,164 --> 00:32:50,714
Well, what are you waiting for?

469
00:32:56,416 --> 00:32:57,726
"Mother's blue teapot indeed," I said.

470
00:32:57,750 --> 00:33:01,000
"Well you should know, you were
the last to see it."

471
00:33:01,918 --> 00:33:05,211
Then the next thing I know,
she's eyeing the sherry glasses.

472
00:33:05,627 --> 00:33:09,777
She's always been eyeing the sherry glasses
ever since she first came to the home...

473
00:33:10,795 --> 00:33:12,595
- Ten o'clock in the morning?
- What?

474
00:33:13,296 --> 00:33:14,669
You had a row with your boyfriend

475
00:33:14,693 --> 00:33:17,047
- at 10 o'clock in the morning?
- I had a free.

476
00:33:17,255 --> 00:33:20,589
Study periods are for study, Laura.

477
00:33:21,757 --> 00:33:23,608
Evening is the proper time to
have rows

478
00:33:23,632 --> 00:33:24,675
with your boyfriend.

479
00:33:24,841 --> 00:33:26,590
I couldn't see him in the evening.

480
00:33:26,758 --> 00:33:29,193
Does the sun ever appear late
over the horizon, saying

481
00:33:29,217 --> 00:33:31,867
please sir, the bus was full,
the train was on strike?

482
00:33:32,676 --> 00:33:34,861
His wife wouldn't let him
go out in the evening.

483
00:33:34,885 --> 00:33:37,885
If the sun depended on public
transport to arrive each day...

484
00:33:38,010 --> 00:33:39,010
His wife?

485
00:33:39,261 --> 00:33:41,178
It's okay. He didn't get on with her.

486
00:33:46,430 --> 00:33:48,781
I suppose you have passed
the driving test, Laura.

487
00:33:48,805 --> 00:33:49,806
As good as...

488
00:33:50,014 --> 00:33:51,448
What's that supposed to mean?

489
00:33:51,472 --> 00:33:52,822
I only failed on one thing.

490
00:33:53,140 --> 00:33:54,140
Right. Pull in!

491
00:33:55,057 --> 00:33:56,683
Now please, at once.

492
00:34:08,602 --> 00:34:11,103
Let's get one thing straight
at any rate.

493
00:34:15,938 --> 00:34:17,521
Get in the other side.

494
00:34:24,189 --> 00:34:25,189
Blue 1100.

495
00:34:25,482 --> 00:34:27,150
Million blue 1100s.

496
00:34:27,357 --> 00:34:29,442
A middle-aged man and a girl.

497
00:34:33,277 --> 00:34:35,192
That's life I'm afraid, Laura.

498
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:38,110
You can drive, but you
haven't passed the test.

499
00:34:38,527 --> 00:34:41,677
I, on the other hand, have passed
the test but wouldn't claim...

500
00:35:55,048 --> 00:35:57,524
Don't worry, we'll just pull the
wing away from the wheel.

501
00:35:57,548 --> 00:35:58,716
She'll be all right.

502
00:35:59,716 --> 00:36:02,266
It'll all be covered, Laura.
Your dad's insurance...

503
00:36:03,425 --> 00:36:05,343
I'm the one they'll summons,

504
00:36:06,176 --> 00:36:07,527
- and the one
who'll have to tell
your dad... - Yes,

505
00:36:07,551 --> 00:36:10,719
and another thing. Have you
stopped for petrol anywhere?

506
00:36:14,386 --> 00:36:15,596
Petrol?

507
00:36:18,554 --> 00:36:20,054
No, we filled it up yesterday.

508
00:36:25,598 --> 00:36:26,598
Didn't we, Laura?

509
00:36:49,334 --> 00:36:52,481
No!! That's part of our car!

510
00:37:02,399 --> 00:37:04,734
It's jangling all about, I can hear it.

511
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:06,700
It's scratching the paint.

512
00:37:06,859 --> 00:37:10,259
We must find a phone, warn them
I'm not going to be there until 4.00.

513
00:37:11,236 --> 00:37:14,028
Does the tide ever go out during
a study period, saying:

514
00:37:14,195 --> 00:37:17,071
"please sir, I'm having a row
with my boyfriend"?

515
00:37:19,655 --> 00:37:22,072
It isn't someone on the staff, is it?

516
00:37:23,073 --> 00:37:24,530
It's not Mr Slidewell?

517
00:37:29,241 --> 00:37:30,241
Mr Fellowdew?

518
00:37:35,451 --> 00:37:36,701
- It's not Mr Jolly?
- No.

519
00:37:38,494 --> 00:37:39,844
I wasn't anywhere near him.

520
00:37:40,827 --> 00:37:43,477
You realise if you're not licensed,
we're not insured.

521
00:37:44,203 --> 00:37:45,703
12:59...

522
00:37:50,205 --> 00:37:51,788
Phone! Here we are.

523
00:38:02,624 --> 00:38:04,626
10p. Have you got 10p?

524
00:38:14,294 --> 00:38:17,377
Alright then, in the third race
tipping no.4 for a win and no.7...

525
00:38:17,401 --> 00:38:18,963
Sorry!

526
00:39:04,350 --> 00:39:06,143
<i>University of Norwich.</i>

527
00:39:32,066 --> 00:39:33,191
They're vandalizing

528
00:39:33,357 --> 00:39:35,234
those phones again, Pat.

529
00:39:35,441 --> 00:39:37,275
All right Mum, just go.

530
00:39:37,442 --> 00:39:38,492
- When's lunch?
- Now.

531
00:39:38,650 --> 00:39:39,901
Granny's just getting it.

532
00:39:40,235 --> 00:39:42,044
Tell Tom and Boo lunch is
on the table.

533
00:39:42,068 --> 00:39:44,235
The phones, Pat!

534
00:39:45,153 --> 00:39:47,195
They're at the phones again.

535
00:39:48,403 --> 00:39:49,946
I'll just put my woolly on.

536
00:39:52,155 --> 00:39:53,864
<i>University of Norwich.</i>

537
00:40:22,580 --> 00:40:24,038
A girl and a boy.

538
00:40:24,288 --> 00:40:27,289
He's showing off his muscles,
and she's egging him on.

539
00:40:27,540 --> 00:40:30,290
I'll try and keep them talking
till the police get here.

540
00:40:37,584 --> 00:40:38,916
<i>University of Norwich.</i>

541
00:40:39,167 --> 00:40:40,167
Thank God, look

542
00:40:40,251 --> 00:40:42,877
I'm calling long distance, and
I've only got one 10p,

543
00:40:43,084 --> 00:40:47,020
so could you please give a message to the
secretary of the Headmasters' Conference?

544
00:40:47,044 --> 00:40:48,378
<i>University of Norwich.</i>

545
00:40:48,628 --> 00:40:51,646
Yes, our annual meeting's being held there;
it starts at 5.00.

546
00:40:51,670 --> 00:40:54,463
Would you tell him I was supposed
to be there at 3.00...

547
00:40:54,672 --> 00:40:56,106
<i>Hello. University of Norwich.</i>

548
00:40:56,130 --> 00:40:57,214
Can't you hear me?

549
00:40:57,422 --> 00:40:59,606
I said, would you tell him I'm going
to be slightly late

550
00:40:59,630 --> 00:41:01,423
<i>Put your money in the box, caller.</i>

551
00:41:01,965 --> 00:41:03,673
I've put my money in the box!

552
00:41:03,883 --> 00:41:05,591
It's eaten the money.

553
00:41:05,925 --> 00:41:08,258
I haven't got any more money.

554
00:41:26,847 --> 00:41:27,597
How old are you?

555
00:41:27,805 --> 00:41:28,890
It's out of order.

556
00:41:32,015 --> 00:41:34,099
I'll tell you how old you are.

557
00:41:34,932 --> 00:41:37,032
You're two years and one day
older than me.

558
00:41:37,183 --> 00:41:39,225
I mean it took the money, and

559
00:41:41,517 --> 00:41:42,517
Pat?

560
00:41:44,018 --> 00:41:47,290
- Fancy meeting you like this!
- Good God!

561
00:41:48,395 --> 00:41:49,978
- You don't live here?
- No, no.

562
00:41:52,103 --> 00:41:55,653
I don't live here. I don't even live
in England. I'm just seeing my mum.

563
00:41:55,772 --> 00:41:57,356
Isn't that amazing!

564
00:41:57,835 --> 00:42:00,019
- Well...
- Anyway, run.

565
00:42:00,043 --> 00:42:03,583
You don't have to tell me what you're
up to these days because I can see...

566
00:42:03,607 --> 00:42:04,649
you're late!

567
00:42:04,816 --> 00:42:06,418
No, no no; it was the third
telephone box in a row...

568
00:42:06,442 --> 00:42:08,001
Still late for everything,
are you Brian?

569
00:42:08,025 --> 00:42:09,418
No, I'm not late these days
as a matter of fact...

570
00:42:09,442 --> 00:42:12,169
What was it this time, Brain? Buses on
strike? Got the wrong train?

571
00:42:12,193 --> 00:42:13,543
I'm not late! Ha, ha, ha...

572
00:42:14,527 --> 00:42:16,277
I'd say come and have lunch.

573
00:42:16,486 --> 00:42:17,486
Um, unfortunately

574
00:42:17,570 --> 00:42:19,861
All right, Brian. Just your luck isn't it.

575
00:42:20,028 --> 00:42:23,547
Running into someone you haven't seen
for twenty years when you're late already.

576
00:42:23,571 --> 00:42:26,489
No, no I'm not late.
I'm merely in a hurry.

577
00:42:27,238 --> 00:42:28,052
Well, give me a kiss

578
00:42:28,260 --> 00:42:29,698
and I'll let you run.

579
00:42:38,450 --> 00:42:40,450
Lovely to see you again, Brian.

580
00:42:41,785 --> 00:42:43,303
Here, come on, and I'll give
you Mum's number.

581
00:42:43,327 --> 00:42:44,825
You can phone me when you've
got a moment.

582
00:42:44,849 --> 00:42:45,890
Oh, right.

583
00:42:46,952 --> 00:42:50,370
You won't believe this, but
your dad and I...

584
00:42:50,536 --> 00:42:52,554
were at training college together,
and he was late...

585
00:42:52,578 --> 00:42:54,014
Pat, could I make a phone call?

586
00:42:54,038 --> 00:42:56,413
He was late the first time
he took me out,

587
00:42:56,621 --> 00:42:58,182
He was late every time
he took me out.

588
00:42:58,206 --> 00:43:01,415
He was late the day he collected
his diploma.

589
00:43:01,581 --> 00:43:03,431
Oh, he hasn't told you
about all that.

590
00:43:03,998 --> 00:43:06,583
Haven't you told her about
your murky past then?

591
00:43:07,374 --> 00:43:08,624
He's not even listening.

592
00:43:11,626 --> 00:43:13,334
I said you're not even listening.

593
00:43:13,543 --> 00:43:14,876
I suppose not.

594
00:43:18,919 --> 00:43:19,919
Out!

595
00:43:23,004 --> 00:43:26,304
Well, I can see your mind's on other
things. I mustn't hold you up.

596
00:43:26,380 --> 00:43:27,730
Yes, we must be on our way.

597
00:43:28,610 --> 00:43:31,131
- No!
- She won't let...

598
00:43:31,401 --> 00:43:33,649
poor old dad drive, will she?

599
00:43:33,673 --> 00:43:35,548
No, I won't.

600
00:43:35,757 --> 00:43:37,957
She's lovely, Brian. A real
glint in her eye.

601
00:43:38,195 --> 00:43:40,718
Yes. Ah, Pat? Can you drive?

602
00:43:40,966 --> 00:43:43,468
Great to see you anyway.
Can I drive?

603
00:43:43,676 --> 00:43:45,195
You passed your test?
You've got a license?

604
00:43:45,219 --> 00:43:47,907
Yes. What's all this about?

605
00:43:47,969 --> 00:43:51,136
Have a drive! Go on! See what
you think. All right?

606
00:43:52,594 --> 00:43:53,971
Just round the block.

607
00:44:00,305 --> 00:44:02,348
I'd like to know what you think.
Come on!

608
00:44:03,182 --> 00:44:04,703
Well I thought you were late.

609
00:44:05,078 --> 00:44:06,778
Ah, I'm not late!
Ha, ha, ha, ha...

610
00:44:08,391 --> 00:44:09,641
Funny man you are, Brian.

611
00:44:17,768 --> 00:44:19,912
I haven't driven in this country
for twenty years.

612
00:44:19,936 --> 00:44:20,644
Never mind, off you go.

613
00:44:20,811 --> 00:44:22,579
- Married a dentist down under.
- Right.

614
00:44:22,603 --> 00:44:24,955
Just brought the kids over to stay
with Mum. We were going to have lunch.

615
00:44:24,979 --> 00:44:26,830
- Right. Let's go.
- You've got time for lunch, haven't you?

616
00:44:26,854 --> 00:44:28,396
I bet you're starving.

617
00:44:28,563 --> 00:44:31,463
I've got one your age.
- Later. Get the driving over first!

618
00:44:32,314 --> 00:44:33,714
Once round the block then...

619
00:44:33,773 --> 00:44:35,190
Close your eyes and pray.

620
00:44:37,315 --> 00:44:39,215
- On the left still, isn't it?
- Right.

621
00:44:39,338 --> 00:44:40,338
On the right?

622
00:44:40,379 --> 00:44:41,442
Left, left.

623
00:44:41,504 --> 00:44:42,525
Right.

624
00:44:50,820 --> 00:44:52,507
Stop them! Stop them!

625
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:54,946
What? They, they did the phone?

626
00:44:55,113 --> 00:44:57,821
The phone yes, but now they've
kidnapped my daughter.

627
00:44:58,113 --> 00:44:59,488
It's lovely.

628
00:44:59,592 --> 00:45:00,592
What?

629
00:45:00,634 --> 00:45:03,760
- The car.
- Oh, right.

630
00:45:10,471 --> 00:45:13,323
There's perhaps something not quite right
up here somewhere.

631
00:45:13,347 --> 00:45:14,597
That's the wing.

632
00:45:14,805 --> 00:45:16,139
The wing?

633
00:45:16,805 --> 00:45:19,891
He pulled it off. Dad'll kill me.

634
00:45:22,682 --> 00:45:25,683
It's Dad's car. It's not his car.

635
00:45:26,434 --> 00:45:29,601
He's not my father.
He's Mr Stimpson.

636
00:45:34,019 --> 00:45:36,686
Why did you tell her I
was your daughter?

637
00:45:37,644 --> 00:45:40,244
Daughter? Who, me? No, son.
I haven't got a daughter.

638
00:45:43,730 --> 00:45:45,563
What, Laura?
Laura's one of my girls.

639
00:45:47,397 --> 00:45:51,023
One of my sixth formers. She's very kindly
driving me to Norwich.

640
00:45:51,315 --> 00:45:53,940
It's a headmasters conference; I'm a
headmaster now.

641
00:45:54,232 --> 00:45:56,691
Yes, well I'll say 'goodbye'
then, Brian.

642
00:45:57,901 --> 00:45:58,525
You can't stop here!

643
00:45:58,816 --> 00:46:00,294
It's all right, I'll walk back.

644
00:46:00,318 --> 00:46:01,318
The police...

645
00:46:02,443 --> 00:46:05,253
It's your life, Brian. I don't
want to say anything. I just
don't want to get involved.

646
00:46:05,277 --> 00:46:06,427
Keep going, keep going!

647
00:46:07,715 --> 00:46:11,213
We'll be out in the county in a minute.
My children don't know where I am.

648
00:46:11,237 --> 00:46:13,672
- We're just sitting down to lunch.
- It's all right. We'll find a bus stop.

649
00:46:13,696 --> 00:46:15,339
- Find a bus stop?
- Here's a bus stop.

650
00:46:15,363 --> 00:46:16,813
You can't stop at a bus stop.

651
00:46:16,989 --> 00:46:17,822
Well where am I going?

652
00:46:17,989 --> 00:46:18,989
Straight on.

653
00:46:22,948 --> 00:46:24,240
Well done.

654
00:46:24,407 --> 00:46:25,407
Hooting.

655
00:46:25,532 --> 00:46:26,532
Oh, don't mind him!

656
00:46:27,116 --> 00:46:29,966
I don't know where we are.
I don't know where we're going!

657
00:46:30,076 --> 00:46:31,376
I'll tell you. One moment.

658
00:46:36,973 --> 00:46:38,158
It was always the same thing.

659
00:46:38,182 --> 00:46:39,659
You feel sorry for them, don't you?

660
00:46:39,683 --> 00:46:42,433
You'd start off in evening dress
and silver dance shoes,

661
00:46:42,558 --> 00:46:45,409
and end up running, your skirt in your hand
and your heel down a grating.

662
00:46:45,433 --> 00:46:47,118
And then they turn round and
scream at you.

663
00:46:47,142 --> 00:46:49,742
- Next left. Be posted to Northampton.
- Northampton!

664
00:46:51,353 --> 00:46:52,412
We'll put you on the train.

665
00:46:52,436 --> 00:46:55,329
What do you mean you'll put me on the
train? They're sitting round the table,

666
00:46:55,353 --> 00:46:56,503
waiting to start lunch!

667
00:46:56,603 --> 00:46:57,603
Get a move on then!

668
00:46:59,646 --> 00:47:01,146
Put your foot down!

669
00:47:01,397 --> 00:47:02,981
It's like being nineteen again.

670
00:47:03,356 --> 00:47:05,273
I hated being nineteen.

671
00:47:08,690 --> 00:47:10,190
Right, fine.

672
00:47:10,607 --> 00:47:14,211
We shouldn't be doing this kind
of speed, not in a car like this.

673
00:47:14,235 --> 00:47:15,276
Right, right.

674
00:47:16,651 --> 00:47:18,859
Listen to it, it's coming to pieces.

675
00:47:19,027 --> 00:47:20,652
Terrible.

676
00:47:21,443 --> 00:47:23,945
Now where am I going?
I'm going left, am I?

677
00:47:25,236 --> 00:47:26,236
Right, right.

678
00:47:26,404 --> 00:47:27,404
Right?

679
00:47:35,823 --> 00:47:38,273
All right, 10 minutes and we'll
be in Northampton.

680
00:47:38,365 --> 00:47:39,616
Northampton was left.

681
00:47:39,865 --> 00:47:40,866
That was our turn?

682
00:47:41,074 --> 00:47:42,824
- You said 'right'.
- I said "left"!

683
00:47:42,992 --> 00:47:45,242
Brian, don't you shout at me.

684
00:47:45,409 --> 00:47:46,927
Can't anyone tell left from right?

685
00:47:46,951 --> 00:47:48,201
She's doing her best.

686
00:47:48,952 --> 00:47:52,452
Right. Just take the next left,
will you?

687
00:47:52,703 --> 00:47:54,136
I'll get straight out of
the car.

688
00:47:54,160 --> 00:47:56,554
You can't get out of the car now
till we get to Northampton.

689
00:47:56,578 --> 00:47:57,578
Always late,

690
00:47:57,787 --> 00:48:00,514
and always trying to make it my
fault, always screaming at me.

691
00:48:00,538 --> 00:48:04,581
I was not screaming, I was merely
saying 'left'.

692
00:48:05,081 --> 00:48:09,141
Now they've made you headmaster.
Like putting a shark in charge
of a swimming pool!

693
00:48:09,165 --> 00:48:12,145
Left. Left.

694
00:48:13,041 --> 00:48:14,542
Left! Left!

695
00:48:18,542 --> 00:48:21,043
What's this? This isn't going anywhere!

696
00:48:21,252 --> 00:48:24,420
It's going back to the
Northampton Road.

697
00:48:24,627 --> 00:48:26,063
They'll be out of their minds.

698
00:48:26,087 --> 00:48:30,421
Just keep absolutely calm, and turn left
and left again.

699
00:48:31,588 --> 00:48:33,588
So, left here...

700
00:48:35,047 --> 00:48:36,505
Perfect, thank you.

701
00:48:36,922 --> 00:48:38,048
Well done.

702
00:48:38,298 --> 00:48:40,598
Now, we just go round the
next corner... and...

703
00:48:48,009 --> 00:48:49,093
Now what?

704
00:48:49,634 --> 00:48:51,635
Don't worry. We just go back.

705
00:48:52,011 --> 00:48:53,136
Back?

706
00:48:53,511 --> 00:48:55,887
Right. Reverse.

707
00:48:56,053 --> 00:48:58,304
How did this happen to me?

708
00:48:59,429 --> 00:49:01,054
In reverse gear.

709
00:49:06,055 --> 00:49:08,182
Put it into reverse.

710
00:49:09,890 --> 00:49:12,433
Show her where
reverse is, Laura.

711
00:49:15,455 --> 00:49:19,726
Good, well done. Come on then.
Come on.

712
00:49:20,352 --> 00:49:21,424
Come on.

713
00:49:21,448 --> 00:49:23,872
Come on. Well done.

714
00:49:23,896 --> 00:49:25,563
Come a... STOP!

715
00:49:34,771 --> 00:49:37,856
This is a historic moment.

716
00:49:38,732 --> 00:49:42,024
Little did I dream that I should
be sitting here...

717
00:49:46,692 --> 00:49:48,775
When are we going to have lunch?

718
00:49:53,611 --> 00:49:55,411
- Into the field...
- Into the field?

719
00:49:57,236 --> 00:49:59,111
Just do as I say.

720
00:50:18,825 --> 00:50:22,761
We'll get something to eat in Northampton.
We'll hit the road in about 100 yards.

721
00:50:22,785 --> 00:50:23,835
I know this is wrong.

722
00:50:24,744 --> 00:50:26,660
I knew it! I knew it!

723
00:50:52,584 --> 00:50:55,085
It'll be just beyond that next hedge.

724
00:51:19,926 --> 00:51:22,218
Just beyond the next hedge.

725
00:51:22,759 --> 00:51:24,469
Je vois d�j� les voitures.

726
00:51:24,636 --> 00:51:27,070
Look, I can see the cars. I can
see them moving. Right then.

727
00:51:27,094 --> 00:51:28,428
There's no track-

728
00:51:28,969 --> 00:51:31,137
We've come to the end of the track.

729
00:51:31,387 --> 00:51:34,472
We don't need a track.
It's grass. Come on.

730
00:52:16,565 --> 00:52:20,001
Perhaps I sound a little old fashioned,
but we live in a world where time

731
00:52:20,025 --> 00:52:23,567
is becoming not less important, but
ever more so.

732
00:52:23,776 --> 00:52:26,403
Imagine a spacecraft running late;

733
00:52:26,653 --> 00:52:30,236
it might miss its orbit completely,
and find itself wandering off

734
00:52:30,403 --> 00:52:32,946
into the trackless depths of the universe.

735
00:52:48,534 --> 00:52:51,551
A nightmare! A nightmare!

736
00:52:51,575 --> 00:52:54,742
Hold it, and hold it. Let's just have
a quiet think.

737
00:52:54,952 --> 00:52:56,352
I'm never going to get home!

738
00:52:56,618 --> 00:52:58,536
Stop it! You'll break the engine.

739
00:53:01,183 --> 00:53:05,538
Thank you. Thank you. Now,
it's five to two.

740
00:53:05,955 --> 00:53:06,955
I'm hungry.

741
00:53:08,122 --> 00:53:10,123
You're hungry? We're all hungry.

742
00:53:10,455 --> 00:53:14,498
We can't eat now because we're in
the middle of a field.

743
00:53:15,290 --> 00:53:19,083
So, we have to adapt
to our circumstances.

744
00:53:25,294 --> 00:53:27,669
Now, I wanted to be in Norwich at 3.00

745
00:53:27,835 --> 00:53:29,478
to greet everyone as they arrive.

746
00:53:29,502 --> 00:53:32,253
I can't be there at 3.00, so instead

747
00:53:33,003 --> 00:53:34,879
I want to be there at 5.00

748
00:53:35,087 --> 00:53:36,671
in time to deliver my speech.

749
00:53:37,422 --> 00:53:40,630
This is how mankind has evolved
from the primeval slime...

750
00:53:41,172 --> 00:53:43,881
by adapting to circumstances.

751
00:53:44,381 --> 00:53:47,508
We can't go forwards, so we'll
go backwards instead.

752
00:53:47,674 --> 00:53:50,466
Put it in reverse for her, Laura.
I'll push.

753
00:53:51,613 --> 00:53:54,322
Right? Right.

754
00:54:23,164 --> 00:54:28,893
No! Thank you. Stay here.
Don't move.

755
00:55:08,321 --> 00:55:11,863
Excuse me... Hello.

756
00:55:14,948 --> 00:55:17,157
Can you tell me...?
Do you know...?

757
00:55:17,532 --> 00:55:21,158
Is there anyone round
here with a tractor?

758
00:55:22,034 --> 00:55:23,034
Won my bet, anyway.

759
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:27,150
Watched you go down on
that hoed dirt...

760
00:55:27,242 --> 00:55:30,542
Bet myself a cheese sandwich you
wouldn't get as far as the bottom.

761
00:55:31,995 --> 00:55:34,645
Right, we're stuck. We need a tractor,
to pull us out.

762
00:55:37,413 --> 00:55:38,847
'Avin' a day in the country, are you?

763
00:55:38,871 --> 00:55:40,955
Not really. Is there a farm...

764
00:55:41,164 --> 00:55:42,623
near here?

765
00:55:42,955 --> 00:55:44,873
Gettin' close to nature?

766
00:55:45,039 --> 00:55:46,665
Right, right.

767
00:55:46,874 --> 00:55:50,124
We're in rather a hurry, you see.
I have to be in Norwich by 5.00.

768
00:55:50,374 --> 00:55:53,542
Norwich? You're goin' to Norwich?

769
00:55:53,709 --> 00:55:57,417
Yes, so if we can just find
a tractor...

770
00:55:58,044 --> 00:55:59,252
What? Short cut is it?

771
00:56:00,544 --> 00:56:04,462
Lost our way. So we must
quickly find a tractor.

772
00:56:06,921 --> 00:56:10,797
Well, my advice is this...

773
00:56:15,798 --> 00:56:16,798
Yes?

774
00:56:19,132 --> 00:56:20,482
If you're goin' this way...

775
00:56:23,383 --> 00:56:24,759
find a tractor...

776
00:56:24,966 --> 00:56:25,966
A tractor, yes...

777
00:56:28,134 --> 00:56:30,684
and stay on the bloody thing
all the way to Norwich.

778
00:56:34,219 --> 00:56:37,595
Thank you. Thank you very much!

779
00:56:39,554 --> 00:56:42,054
- I'll tell ya' something else...
- Yes, thank you.

780
00:56:43,055 --> 00:56:44,305
Know what I'm sittin' on?

781
00:56:44,430 --> 00:56:45,972
A bomb, I hope.

782
00:56:47,265 --> 00:56:48,807
All right, my old dear,

783
00:56:49,432 --> 00:56:51,516
You look that way, and I'll look this,

784
00:56:52,641 --> 00:56:55,142
and I bet you a jam tart

785
00:56:55,809 --> 00:56:57,976
I find a tractor first.

786
00:57:20,107 --> 00:57:22,066
Headin' for Norwich, I believe?

787
00:57:24,358 --> 00:57:25,358
Some of us.

788
00:57:27,068 --> 00:57:29,026
You dodged the traffic, anyway.

789
00:57:36,196 --> 00:57:44,196
Come on. Come on. Oh, for God's sake.
Turn the record player down.

790
00:57:48,615 --> 00:57:50,824
Ah, right. There you are.

791
00:57:51,324 --> 00:57:53,574
Now, a tractor. I'm looking for
a tractor.

792
00:57:53,741 --> 00:57:55,641
You don't have a tractor here, do you?

793
00:57:59,535 --> 00:58:04,244
I'm so sorry, but it is rather urgent.
I have to be in Norwich by...

794
00:58:11,330 --> 00:58:12,913
Of course, a monastery.

795
00:58:14,038 --> 00:58:15,748
I might have guessed.

796
00:58:59,301 --> 00:59:01,260
Have they found a tractor?

797
00:59:10,179 --> 00:59:12,847
Well, it doesn't matter.
Wasn't important.

798
00:59:26,016 --> 00:59:29,684
I'm sorry to let them down, that's all.
It doesn't matter to me.

799
00:59:33,601 --> 00:59:35,201
It was important for the school.

800
00:59:35,686 --> 00:59:37,729
Would've meant so much to the children.

801
00:59:39,897 --> 00:59:44,689
Well... I suppose we
couldn't ring for a taxi?

802
00:59:48,397 --> 00:59:49,397
No phone?

803
00:59:54,899 --> 00:59:57,349
It would have meant a lot to
my mother, of course,

804
00:59:59,985 --> 01:00:00,985
if she'd been alive.

805
01:00:03,736 --> 01:00:07,861
I mean, I'd be happy to enter a monastery
and never speak again

806
01:00:08,778 --> 01:00:10,361
We speak.

807
01:00:12,529 --> 01:00:17,696
I'm sorry, I... I just assumed...
I'm sorry.

808
01:00:32,784 --> 01:00:34,534
What do you think I should do then?

809
01:00:36,161 --> 01:00:37,828
Have a bath, perhaps?

810
01:01:03,293 --> 01:01:04,293
They're women!

811
01:01:10,003 --> 01:01:12,553
Funny ol' boyfriend you girls have
found yourselves.

812
01:01:12,588 --> 01:01:16,838
Takes you for nature study in the country,
then slips off and enters a monastery!

813
01:01:19,881 --> 01:01:22,441
- Right, I'm off.
- Mr Stimpson?

814
01:01:22,465 --> 01:01:24,315
Are you coming with me,
or aren't you.

815
01:01:24,381 --> 01:01:25,215
This is our car!

816
01:01:25,382 --> 01:01:26,799
I'm not waiting.

817
01:01:28,780 --> 01:01:35,030
Mr Stimpson? Mr Stimpson?

818
01:01:46,907 --> 01:01:48,574
Mr Stimpson!

819
01:02:25,453 --> 01:02:27,328
<i>Mr Stimpson!</i>

820
01:02:38,892 --> 01:02:40,559
<i>Mr Stimpson!</i>

821
01:02:42,111 --> 01:02:43,820
Quick, where are you?

822
01:02:45,363 --> 01:02:47,013
It's your friend, she won't wait.

823
01:02:47,279 --> 01:02:48,781
They can't find a tractor.

824
01:02:49,156 --> 01:02:51,447
We've got one. It's pulled us out.

825
01:02:53,698 --> 01:02:54,949
What are you doing?

826
01:02:55,282 --> 01:02:56,782
I'm having a bath.

827
01:02:57,367 --> 01:02:59,116
- You've got one?
- She's going.

828
01:02:59,574 --> 01:03:00,574
I'll be right down.

829
01:03:16,371 --> 01:03:17,371
Well?

830
01:03:17,496 --> 01:03:18,996
He's having a bath.

831
01:03:19,789 --> 01:03:23,456
A bath? Why not a sauna and
massage as well?

832
01:03:23,789 --> 01:03:25,039
Again?

833
01:03:30,562 --> 01:03:31,562
Mr Stimpson?

834
01:03:32,667 --> 01:03:33,876
Where is she?

835
01:03:34,626 --> 01:03:38,502
She's gone. I said he's having
a bath, and she went.

836
01:03:40,335 --> 01:03:41,670
Stop her!

837
01:03:41,877 --> 01:03:43,920
It's our car!

838
01:03:59,466 --> 01:04:00,883
End of the lane.

839
01:04:24,931 --> 01:04:26,890
Ah, can't... can't...

840
01:04:27,391 --> 01:04:28,933
Sandal...

841
01:04:30,432 --> 01:04:33,518
We found the road, anyway.

842
01:04:36,768 --> 01:04:38,893
It's not the despair, Laura,

843
01:04:39,769 --> 01:04:42,644
I can stand the despair;
it's the hope.

844
01:04:46,062 --> 01:04:47,062
There!

845
01:04:58,107 --> 01:05:04,568
Blue Morris 1100, registration number
Romeo Delta Xray 364 Juliet.

846
01:05:06,025 --> 01:05:10,153
We've also got Mrs Garden, reported
missing, believed kidnapped.

847
01:05:10,569 --> 01:05:12,778
State of shock, otherwise
appears all right.

848
01:05:12,986 --> 01:05:14,070
No sign of the girl.

849
01:05:14,403 --> 01:05:16,070
She's at the monastery.

850
01:05:16,862 --> 01:05:18,946
Oh, she's apparently in a monastery.

851
01:05:19,113 --> 01:05:20,654
No sign of the male suspect.

852
01:05:21,239 --> 01:05:22,697
He's in the bath.

853
01:05:23,656 --> 01:05:25,157
He's in the bath.

854
01:05:25,407 --> 01:05:26,781
In the monastery?

855
01:05:28,574 --> 01:05:31,199
In the bath, in a monastery.

856
01:05:32,117 --> 01:05:34,417
It's gonna take a bit of sorting out,
this one!

857
01:05:34,534 --> 01:05:36,242
We'll bring Mrs Garden in anyway.

858
01:05:36,742 --> 01:05:39,092
We're charging her with taking
and driving away,

859
01:05:39,118 --> 01:05:41,535
driving a vehicle in an
unroadworthy condition,

860
01:05:41,743 --> 01:05:45,454
exceeding the speed limit, and
assaulting a police officer.

861
01:05:48,829 --> 01:05:50,205
Nearly there...

862
01:05:52,581 --> 01:05:54,331
One little slip, Laura, that's all.

863
01:05:55,206 --> 01:05:57,415
Said 'right', meant 'left'.

864
01:05:58,249 --> 01:05:59,749
One word!

865
01:06:00,707 --> 01:06:02,167
Going!

866
01:06:06,542 --> 01:06:08,042
Gone!

867
01:06:25,464 --> 01:06:28,048
I've lied for this, Laura...
I've stolen,

868
01:06:29,549 --> 01:06:32,050
I've taken you out of school...

869
01:06:34,508 --> 01:06:38,308
Well, I suppose this is a form of
education; it's an education for me, Laura.

870
01:06:40,677 --> 01:06:42,277
You still haven't had any lunch.

871
01:06:45,012 --> 01:06:46,012
We'll get something.

872
01:06:50,220 --> 01:06:51,763
In your suit.

873
01:06:56,848 --> 01:06:57,848
In the bathroom.

874
01:06:58,265 --> 01:07:00,265
I've even lost the time.

875
01:07:19,955 --> 01:07:23,105
He's only a third in geography, but he can
read a balance sheet.

876
01:07:23,498 --> 01:07:26,519
Our merchant bankers thought we
could reckon on 15%.

877
01:07:26,939 --> 01:07:30,291
The Old Boys' Association raised
a quarter of a million, in 3 months...

878
01:07:30,315 --> 01:07:33,015
You know, our people suggested
floating the school off.

879
01:07:33,234 --> 01:07:35,934
We're offering an A level
in classic Arabic, of course.

880
01:07:36,776 --> 01:07:39,378
...and we hope the school mosque will
finished in time for Ramadan.

881
01:07:39,402 --> 01:07:41,252
One in the eye for Millfield, anyway.

882
01:07:41,276 --> 01:07:44,087
We're also planning a Deutsche Mark
offshore fund.

883
01:07:44,111 --> 01:07:47,236
We have to be prepared for any
political eventuality.

884
01:07:47,487 --> 01:07:50,404
...but we do have the same
accountants as Mick Jagger.

885
01:07:50,946 --> 01:07:54,299
...so anyway an air crew came down and
checked out our security arrangements,

886
01:07:54,323 --> 01:07:56,273
with particular reference to the bombs.

887
01:07:57,614 --> 01:07:59,157
Did you ring the school?

888
01:07:59,490 --> 01:08:01,199
They say he left at 10.00

889
01:08:01,532 --> 01:08:03,949
He said he was going to
be here by 3.00

890
01:08:07,409 --> 01:08:10,993
I'm sorry, I'm... just...

891
01:08:12,202 --> 01:08:13,619
I don't know... whether...

892
01:08:15,827 --> 01:08:18,677
Extraordinary appointments some
governors make these days.

893
01:08:19,746 --> 01:08:22,288
Or is that the state sector?

894
01:08:22,538 --> 01:08:25,488
The chap over there came on
a motor cycle by the look of it.

895
01:08:29,748 --> 01:08:30,748
Good God!

896
01:08:31,539 --> 01:08:32,539
There's some woman!

897
01:08:32,957 --> 01:08:35,728
- How did she get in?
- Excuse me.

898
01:08:36,042 --> 01:08:39,668
And at Easter I'm taking the
Classical sixth to Jamaica.

899
01:08:40,377 --> 01:08:41,542
Can I help you at all?

900
01:08:41,752 --> 01:08:43,152
Where is she? Where's Laura?

901
01:08:43,335 --> 01:08:43,961
I'm sorry?

902
01:08:44,210 --> 01:08:47,062
Our daughter! He's going mad, and
he'll have one of his attacks.

903
01:08:47,086 --> 01:08:48,878
Oh! Oh dear. Your daughter?

904
01:08:49,087 --> 01:08:51,880
Well, let's go and have a look for
her, shall we?

905
01:08:52,254 --> 01:08:55,755
I'm sorry, someone should explain.
We don't bring wives and families.

906
01:08:56,005 --> 01:08:57,923
Wives? No, you have 18-year-old girls

907
01:08:58,173 --> 01:09:01,274
who are doing their A levels.
I've never heard anything like it.

908
01:09:01,298 --> 01:09:03,775
Well, let's go upstairs and
discuss it in peace, shall we?

909
01:09:03,799 --> 01:09:05,193
And where is he?
Where's Mr Stimpson?

910
01:09:05,217 --> 01:09:10,322
Mr Stimpson? Ah! Mr Stimpson.

911
01:09:10,488 --> 01:09:13,070
Well, I think you'll like our new
prospectus. It's been done by...

912
01:09:13,094 --> 01:09:14,344
Excuse me one moment.

913
01:09:14,448 --> 01:09:18,280
Anyway, we're hoping the new solarium will
give our sixth form a bit more appeal

914
01:09:18,304 --> 01:09:20,365
- at the top end of the market.
- I'm so sorry.

915
01:09:20,389 --> 01:09:21,905
Would you take these good people

916
01:09:21,929 --> 01:09:24,779
and upstairs, to the room along
the corridor, on the left.

917
01:09:24,972 --> 01:09:26,430
Terrific! Delighted!

918
01:09:26,638 --> 01:09:30,556
See that they have some tea.
I'll be with you in one minute.

919
01:09:31,431 --> 01:09:32,431
Can I help you?

920
01:09:32,473 --> 01:09:34,224
I'm looking for Mr Stimpson.

921
01:09:34,432 --> 01:09:37,225
Oh, we're all looking for Mr Stimpson.
Come with me.

922
01:09:38,058 --> 01:09:40,142
So of course I said:
"I don't drink sherry

923
01:09:40,393 --> 01:09:43,977
"I'm a total abstainer, as you very
well know

924
01:09:44,227 --> 01:09:47,078
"But I do not see why the sherry glasses
should go to Pam, just because she drinks."

925
01:09:47,102 --> 01:09:48,812
Why don't you have a cup of tea?

926
01:09:49,019 --> 01:09:51,062
I told you to stay in the car!

927
01:09:51,270 --> 01:09:53,729
You're another of Mr Stimpson's party,
are you?

928
01:09:53,938 --> 01:09:58,088
Pour them some tea, and take them upstairs,
the room along the corridor on the left.

929
01:09:58,189 --> 01:09:59,189
Very well.

930
01:09:59,231 --> 01:10:00,431
What are you doing here?

931
01:10:00,690 --> 01:10:05,607
Oh, I'm just... I'll... fetch you
a cup of...

932
01:10:12,235 --> 01:10:14,443
He seems to have brought his
entire family.

933
01:10:14,651 --> 01:10:16,151
There's another one here.

934
01:10:16,318 --> 01:10:18,944
Let me guess. You're looking for
Mr Stimpson.

935
01:10:19,279 --> 01:10:21,362
I'm looking for the head doctor.

936
01:10:21,529 --> 01:10:23,987
Well let's see what we can find upstairs.

937
01:10:24,946 --> 01:10:26,321
Mr Stimpson?

938
01:10:27,614 --> 01:10:29,031
Am I?

939
01:10:29,364 --> 01:10:31,739
I don't know where I am or
what I am.

940
01:10:32,156 --> 01:10:33,324
I know the feeling.

941
01:10:37,575 --> 01:10:40,275
Why don't you both make yourselves
comfortable in here?

942
01:10:40,950 --> 01:10:43,636
I'll bring Mr Stimpson to you just as
soon as I've found him.

943
01:10:43,660 --> 01:10:46,202
Terrible bore, I know, but it is
a private meeting.

944
01:10:48,870 --> 01:10:51,555
As a matter of fact, I say it would be
an unfair temptation to put

945
01:10:51,579 --> 01:10:53,620
a sherry glass in her hand.

946
01:10:53,788 --> 01:10:55,371
Mr Stimpson's party?

947
01:10:55,538 --> 01:10:56,538
In here.

948
01:11:00,164 --> 01:11:01,582
Two more for you.

949
01:11:02,623 --> 01:11:05,041
Terrific! Super!

950
01:11:05,749 --> 01:11:07,875
This is the most exciting day!

951
01:11:13,127 --> 01:11:15,543
Detective Sergeant Rice,
Norwich CID.

952
01:11:15,960 --> 01:11:18,210
I believe you have a
Mr Brian Stimpson here.

953
01:11:19,795 --> 01:11:21,003
Nothing wrong, I hope.

954
01:11:21,170 --> 01:11:22,564
We'd just like a word with him, sir.

955
01:11:22,588 --> 01:11:25,754
Well he hasn't arrived yet.
We're waiting for him.

956
01:11:25,921 --> 01:11:27,755
We'll wait too then.
If we may.

957
01:11:29,630 --> 01:11:31,381
I'll bring you some tea.

958
01:11:32,591 --> 01:11:34,966
Stimpson supporters club?
In here.

959
01:11:38,466 --> 01:11:39,466
Do you take sugar?

960
01:11:43,217 --> 01:11:45,718
- Police looking for him now.
- Oh no!

961
01:11:47,219 --> 01:11:48,469
Little boys?

962
01:11:50,344 --> 01:11:52,137
Well, if he's not here by 5.00...

963
01:11:53,262 --> 01:11:56,180
I suppose one of us could
say a few words.

964
01:11:56,805 --> 01:11:58,605
Yes, I could have a go, if you like.

965
01:11:59,306 --> 01:12:01,015
Something about money, perhaps?

966
01:12:01,431 --> 01:12:03,056
Usually a reliable standby.

967
01:12:03,848 --> 01:12:06,223
I hope he's not lying in
some ditch.

968
01:12:06,745 --> 01:12:07,995
Oh, absolutely.

969
01:12:10,350 --> 01:12:13,869
It was going to be the start of so much,
Laura. I was going to go into politics.

970
01:12:13,893 --> 01:12:15,018
I used to think:

971
01:12:16,019 --> 01:12:19,602
"When I become Secretary of State
for Education..."

972
01:12:23,353 --> 01:12:24,770
Don't laugh!

973
01:12:35,940 --> 01:12:37,690
I thought I didn't mind.

974
01:12:40,525 --> 01:12:44,425
When I was in the monastery, I thought
I'd resigned myself to it, but really...

975
01:12:45,401 --> 01:12:47,943
I knew I'd still got time, you see.

976
01:12:49,569 --> 01:12:51,779
Funny how you always know secretly

977
01:12:51,944 --> 01:12:55,154
when the last moment is,
and when it's gone.

978
01:12:57,821 --> 01:12:59,363
And now it has,

979
01:13:01,782 --> 01:13:06,907
I mind, Laura. I mind.

980
01:13:17,160 --> 01:13:18,179
Mr Stimpson

981
01:13:18,203 --> 01:13:19,952
Perhaps I could just...

982
01:13:20,827 --> 01:13:21,972
lying here...

983
01:13:21,996 --> 01:13:23,037
Mr Stimpson!

984
01:13:27,454 --> 01:13:28,704
Wait!

985
01:13:40,875 --> 01:13:42,810
Hop up then darling, what's the trouble?

986
01:13:42,834 --> 01:13:44,167
Does this seat tip up?

987
01:13:44,417 --> 01:13:48,543
Don't worry about the car. It's brand new.
Only got 12 miles on the clock.

988
01:13:49,168 --> 01:13:50,468
What? You pull this lever?

989
01:13:53,003 --> 01:13:54,753
- What's all this.
- We're together.

990
01:13:55,128 --> 01:13:56,146
I don't believe this!

991
01:13:56,170 --> 01:13:57,520
He's got to get to Norwich.

992
01:13:57,837 --> 01:14:01,171
Well, I've seen them pull some stunts,
but... a monk?

993
01:14:07,924 --> 01:14:10,092
Okay. A monk! What can I do?

994
01:14:21,469 --> 01:14:23,637
I'm surprised at you though, Father.

995
01:14:24,012 --> 01:14:27,887
Putting a bird out at the side of the road,
hiding in the ditch.

996
01:14:28,346 --> 01:14:31,246
Does your Father Superior know you
travel around like this?

997
01:14:33,098 --> 01:14:36,074
Funny! You!

998
01:14:36,098 --> 01:14:38,557
Speech... Like that?

999
01:14:40,099 --> 01:14:41,099
What?

1000
01:14:54,436 --> 01:14:57,688
Frankly, Father, I'm shocked,
do you know that?

1001
01:14:57,895 --> 01:15:00,188
I'm not easily shocked,
but I'm shocked.

1002
01:15:00,355 --> 01:15:01,562
- Can we stop?
- What?

1003
01:15:02,230 --> 01:15:04,356
Stop a moment. By these trees.

1004
01:15:12,858 --> 01:15:14,066
What's the trouble?

1005
01:15:14,275 --> 01:15:17,359
- Go for a little walk.
- Go for a walk?

1006
01:15:17,734 --> 01:15:19,276
In the woods.

1007
01:15:21,694 --> 01:15:23,044
You... wanna go for a walk?

1008
01:15:23,111 --> 01:15:24,261
Don't you want to come?

1009
01:15:25,779 --> 01:15:26,946
What... you mean? What?

1010
01:15:28,779 --> 01:15:30,363
No one around!

1011
01:15:33,279 --> 01:15:34,679
Well, this beats everything.

1012
01:15:36,281 --> 01:15:38,824
Sorry about this, Father.
Five minutes, that's all.

1013
01:15:39,032 --> 01:15:40,490
Pick a few flowers.

1014
01:15:45,075 --> 01:15:46,075
Come on then.

1015
01:15:46,118 --> 01:15:47,118
Him?

1016
01:15:49,076 --> 01:15:51,344
Do you want him to come?
Do you want Father there?

1017
01:15:51,368 --> 01:15:54,411
Come on! The sun's out.

1018
01:16:01,038 --> 01:16:02,688
It's a funny old world, isn't it?

1019
01:16:12,374 --> 01:16:15,084
Look, I'll be frank. I'm out of my depth.

1020
01:16:18,209 --> 01:16:19,793
We could take our clothes off.

1021
01:16:34,463 --> 01:16:35,463
Go on then.

1022
01:16:35,506 --> 01:16:36,506
You first.

1023
01:16:45,737 --> 01:16:46,737
Go on.

1024
01:16:55,739 --> 01:16:57,614
Shoes.

1025
01:17:03,013 --> 01:17:04,013
Now you.

1026
01:17:04,888 --> 01:17:07,390
Now, Mr Stimpson.

1027
01:17:08,953 --> 01:17:10,828
Come on then.

1028
01:17:13,599 --> 01:17:15,349
Oh, now look, I'm not doing a solo.

1029
01:17:31,271 --> 01:17:33,313
Come on, be a monk.

1030
01:18:04,947 --> 01:18:06,780
Keys, find the keys.

1031
01:18:09,947 --> 01:18:12,997
I knew it! I knew it was a stunt
the moment he got in the car.

1032
01:18:16,200 --> 01:18:17,742
Give it to me! Give it to me!

1033
01:18:23,577 --> 01:18:26,368
Give me that suit!
300 quid that suit cost me.

1034
01:18:31,996 --> 01:18:34,829
You've torn it.

1035
01:18:35,371 --> 01:18:38,171
Monk. Monk? You've torn the sleeve
off a 300-guinea suit.

1036
01:18:40,040 --> 01:18:41,664
Oh no, not the car!

1037
01:18:44,374 --> 01:18:46,024
It's not mine. It's a customer's.

1038
01:18:46,541 --> 01:18:47,791
It's not insured.

1039
01:18:55,753 --> 01:18:57,853
Oh, please, please,
don't drive. Come back!

1040
01:19:07,172 --> 01:19:09,923
I knew it. From the moment she
stuck her thumb up.

1041
01:19:16,174 --> 01:19:17,234
Don't worry about the sleeve.

1042
01:19:17,258 --> 01:19:21,176
We'll get some sellotape.
We've got some money now.

1043
01:19:22,218 --> 01:19:24,427
Feel in the pockets. How much
have we got?

1044
01:19:30,303 --> 01:19:32,346
Oh, look! Hundreds and hundreds.

1045
01:19:32,720 --> 01:19:34,305
We could do anything.

1046
01:19:34,596 --> 01:19:37,013
We could get Chinese take-aways.

1047
01:19:38,263 --> 01:19:40,223
I saw this film on television once:

1048
01:19:40,389 --> 01:19:43,200
there was this bloke and this girl, and
they went around everywhere in this car,

1049
01:19:43,224 --> 01:19:45,016
robbing these banks and things.

1050
01:19:45,224 --> 01:19:46,849
Did you see that, Mr Stimpson?

1051
01:19:53,935 --> 01:19:58,477
Don't worry, I'll get you there. I'm a
better driver than her, anyway.

1052
01:20:01,479 --> 01:20:03,729
We should have taken his
watch as well.

1053
01:20:04,647 --> 01:20:06,480
Do you know what's worrying me?

1054
01:20:07,230 --> 01:20:10,147
The way I always seem to
get involved with older men.

1055
01:20:38,780 --> 01:20:41,365
No point in waiting beyond 5.00,
is there?

1056
01:20:41,657 --> 01:20:45,907
I'm going to talk about charitable
status and moral leadership.

1057
01:20:49,575 --> 01:20:52,493
Why can't he keep those
damned women locked up?

1058
01:20:57,285 --> 01:20:58,661
So kind of you.

1059
01:20:59,536 --> 01:21:01,662
In everyone's way, as usual.

1060
01:21:03,079 --> 01:21:04,746
I'll just sit myself down.

1061
01:21:06,663 --> 01:21:09,580
Oh dear. Lost again, are we?

1062
01:21:09,914 --> 01:21:11,164
Quite, quite lost.

1063
01:21:11,456 --> 01:21:13,356
Let's see if we can find your friends.

1064
01:21:13,499 --> 01:21:15,499
Excuse me, but I am not shouting at you.

1065
01:21:15,582 --> 01:21:16,874
Excuse me, but you are!

1066
01:21:17,125 --> 01:21:20,143
Excuse me, but I'm merely trying to get
it into your head that he is not here.

1067
01:21:20,167 --> 01:21:21,917
Oh, here they all are.

1068
01:21:22,126 --> 01:21:23,227
So when will he be here?

1069
01:21:23,251 --> 01:21:23,918
I don't know.

1070
01:21:24,085 --> 01:21:25,685
Debating about which word to do.

1071
01:21:25,877 --> 01:21:28,502
Can't you stop these people
wandering into the hall?

1072
01:21:28,836 --> 01:21:30,686
No I can't. They keep wanting
to go to the loo.

1073
01:21:30,710 --> 01:21:34,546
Mrs Wheel needs to go
to the ladies.

1074
01:21:34,712 --> 01:21:36,189
Do you see? And then they
don't come back.

1075
01:21:36,213 --> 01:21:37,880
Call yourself a doctor?

1076
01:21:39,463 --> 01:21:41,548
Get me someone to escort them
to the loo.

1077
01:21:41,714 --> 01:21:43,164
Ooh, we're off again, are we?

1078
01:21:43,256 --> 01:21:45,091
Not you, you've been.

1079
01:21:46,841 --> 01:21:49,675
Detective Inspector Laundryman,
regional crime squad.

1080
01:21:50,591 --> 01:21:51,591
Stimpson?

1081
01:21:51,759 --> 01:21:53,318
Thought I might have a few
words with him.

1082
01:21:53,342 --> 01:21:53,860
In here.

1083
01:21:53,884 --> 01:21:56,592
- Stimpson?
- What are you doing here, George?

1084
01:21:57,092 --> 01:21:58,111
Stimpson.

1085
01:21:58,135 --> 01:21:59,570
Takin' n' drivin', and assault?

1086
01:21:59,594 --> 01:22:01,970
No, taking and driving and kidnapping.

1087
01:22:02,137 --> 01:22:03,595
Right, inside then.

1088
01:22:06,263 --> 01:22:08,012
Let's keep the door closed.

1089
01:22:10,638 --> 01:22:11,763
Um, Gentlemen...

1090
01:22:13,327 --> 01:22:17,493
Gentlemen, if I might have your
attention for one moment...

1091
01:22:17,517 --> 01:22:18,559
Thank you.

1092
01:22:19,558 --> 01:22:21,641
And now the time is...

1093
01:22:22,891 --> 01:22:27,394
is exactly five o'clock, and I'm afraid
I have some bad news for you.

1094
01:22:28,685 --> 01:22:31,311
Our chairman, Mr Stimpson...

1095
01:22:32,812 --> 01:22:33,812
is here.

1096
01:23:15,407 --> 01:23:18,575
This is a historic moment.

1097
01:23:20,158 --> 01:23:22,408
I stand before you today as
your new chairman,

1098
01:23:22,783 --> 01:23:28,576
something that some of us never
expected to see in our lifetime.

1099
01:23:29,994 --> 01:23:31,594
We have come a long way together

1100
01:23:32,994 --> 01:23:34,746
to be where we are today.

1101
01:23:36,662 --> 01:23:37,662
A long way.

1102
01:23:38,330 --> 01:23:39,413
Who is she?

1103
01:23:39,621 --> 01:23:41,289
A long, long way...

1104
01:23:43,039 --> 01:23:47,290
And at this point I should
perhaps explain that

1105
01:23:47,498 --> 01:23:49,124
during the course of my journey

1106
01:23:49,666 --> 01:23:51,458
I have become separated...

1107
01:23:52,875 --> 01:23:55,375
separated from the text of my speech.

1108
01:23:55,626 --> 01:23:59,793
So I hope you will forgive me if
I am a little disconnected.

1109
01:24:10,631 --> 01:24:11,963
Right!

1110
01:24:13,589 --> 01:24:17,049
So I stand here today, and I
look out there

1111
01:24:17,214 --> 01:24:18,841
and what do I see?

1112
01:24:32,219 --> 01:24:33,720
I see myself

1113
01:24:34,345 --> 01:24:36,595
I see myself as I was then,

1114
01:24:38,804 --> 01:24:40,555
an obscure master from an

1115
01:24:40,805 --> 01:24:43,097
overawed comprehensive school.

1116
01:24:47,495 --> 01:24:50,141
Right. So, what was I doing there?

1117
01:24:51,141 --> 01:24:53,391
I was amazed to find herself...

1118
01:24:54,099 --> 01:24:55,649
Um, I was amazed to find myself

1119
01:24:56,351 --> 01:24:59,809
invited to become one of your
very select handful

1120
01:25:00,019 --> 01:25:01,894
of additional women.

1121
01:25:05,686 --> 01:25:07,895
And I was even more amazed still

1122
01:25:08,104 --> 01:25:10,396
at what I was listening to,

1123
01:25:10,562 --> 01:25:13,772
because what I was listening to was

1124
01:25:18,857 --> 01:25:20,690
Well, come in then if you're coming!

1125
01:25:20,941 --> 01:25:23,566
No, because what I was listening to was

1126
01:25:26,150 --> 01:25:27,950
Are there any more of you out there?

1127
01:25:41,529 --> 01:25:43,905
All right. Find yourselves somewhere
to sit.

1128
01:25:50,156 --> 01:25:50,885
Right.

1129
01:25:50,990 --> 01:25:56,200
There I was listening to the headmasters
of schools with great and glorious names

1130
01:25:59,910 --> 01:26:00,993
So kind of you.

1131
01:26:06,036 --> 01:26:07,328
Oh, sit down!

1132
01:26:10,871 --> 01:26:12,497
Yes, we're all waiting for you!

1133
01:26:18,456 --> 01:26:21,269
Thank you.

1134
01:26:21,374 --> 01:26:23,623
Right, so there I was,

1135
01:26:23,647 --> 01:26:27,918
listening to the headmasters of schools
with great and glorious names as they

1136
01:26:31,043 --> 01:26:35,503
kicked around a variety of
weighty topics,

1137
01:26:36,378 --> 01:26:40,921
as they expatiated upon a variety
of weighty balls.

1138
01:26:44,755 --> 01:26:46,455
I'm glad someone finds that funny.

1139
01:26:47,381 --> 01:26:49,173
Did he say what I think he said?

1140
01:26:49,339 --> 01:26:51,382
There's no need to whisper.

1141
01:26:51,549 --> 01:26:54,599
Please come up here and explain the
joke to the entire school.

1142
01:26:57,424 --> 01:26:58,675
And who's that creaking?

1143
01:27:03,052 --> 01:27:04,467
Come on, come on. Let's get it
over with.

1144
01:27:04,491 --> 01:27:06,261
There's a seat down here, look.

1145
01:27:16,264 --> 01:27:17,764
Long way to Norwich, was it?

1146
01:27:20,931 --> 01:27:22,281
Long way to that seat, too.

1147
01:27:28,351 --> 01:27:31,201
Make yourself comfortable then.
Get all the creaking over.

1148
01:27:34,769 --> 01:27:35,769
No rush.

1149
01:27:35,811 --> 01:27:38,228
We've got all the time in the world.

1150
01:27:39,479 --> 01:27:41,479
Time! Right, because I should like,

1151
01:27:41,937 --> 01:27:44,772
before I pass on, before I pass on
to other matters,

1152
01:27:44,980 --> 01:27:47,355
to sound a note of warning.

1153
01:27:50,773 --> 01:27:52,357
And still they come.

1154
01:27:53,566 --> 01:27:57,400
I was just talking, you might be
interested to hear, about time.

1155
01:27:57,775 --> 01:27:59,025
I was going to say that

1156
01:27:59,234 --> 01:28:01,526
we all understood that lateness

1157
01:28:01,693 --> 01:28:04,111
was a discourtesy to others.

1158
01:28:04,318 --> 01:28:06,736
But I'm beginning to wonder.

1159
01:28:08,944 --> 01:28:10,894
You're beginning to wonder too,
are you?

1160
01:28:11,112 --> 01:28:15,176
So perhaps the rest of us could
turn round and face the front,

1161
01:28:15,239 --> 01:28:17,822
and we'll all wonder together.

1162
01:28:18,885 --> 01:28:20,841
Right, thank you.

1163
01:28:20,865 --> 01:28:22,907
Because I'm beginning to wonder

1164
01:28:23,907 --> 01:28:26,658
if I'd be the only person in the world

1165
01:28:26,825 --> 01:28:29,783
who'd be slightly surprised
if the tide came wandering in

1166
01:28:29,950 --> 01:28:33,345
half an hour after the lesson
had started,

1167
01:28:33,369 --> 01:28:35,036
slammed all the doors,

1168
01:28:35,076 --> 01:28:37,264
and stood there gazing
round the room

1169
01:28:37,369 --> 01:28:40,121
trying to find some chums
to sit next to

1170
01:28:40,287 --> 01:28:41,746
while the rest of us

1171
01:28:41,954 --> 01:28:44,659
patiently wait to get on
with the day's events.

1172
01:28:44,683 --> 01:28:46,872
Perhaps I sound a little old fashioned,

1173
01:28:46,976 --> 01:28:48,831
but imagine a spacecraft

1174
01:28:48,936 --> 01:28:54,875
that was endlessly interrupted by
latecomers and flapping doors.

1175
01:28:56,624 --> 01:29:01,250
It might just possibly go
completely mad!

1176
01:29:02,042 --> 01:29:03,460
It might just possibly

1177
01:29:03,668 --> 01:29:06,377
lift off the launch pad and go

1178
01:29:06,627 --> 01:29:09,878
streaming off into the depths
of the universe.

1179
01:29:10,295 --> 01:29:14,379
And never been seen again until
the end of time.

1180
01:30:05,602 --> 01:30:07,685
Right. Hymn 122:

1181
01:30:08,686 --> 01:30:11,145
"He Who Would Valiant Be".

1182
01:31:34,719 --> 01:31:36,921
Mr Stimpson!

1183
01:32:01,612 --> 01:32:02,943
Excuse me, sir.

1184
01:32:02,967 --> 01:32:04,634
Mr Stimpson? Mr Stimpson?

1185
01:32:04,843 --> 01:32:06,927
Brian? Brian, stay there.

1186
01:32:07,136 --> 01:32:11,593
- Mr Stimpson?
- Laura! Laura!

1187
01:32:11,617 --> 01:32:12,427
Excuse me.

1188
01:32:12,451 --> 01:32:14,001
Are you Mr Brian Stimpson of...

1189
01:32:23,390 --> 01:32:25,370
I want to have a word with my husband.

1190
01:32:30,370 --> 01:32:33,079
This is my lovely day,

1191
01:32:34,226 --> 01:32:37,328
this is the day I will remember,

1192
01:32:37,352 --> 01:32:40,767
the day I'm dying.

1193
01:32:40,791 --> 01:32:44,622
They can't take this away,

1194
01:32:44,646 --> 01:32:49,311
it will be always mine,
the sun and the wine,

1195
01:32:49,335 --> 01:32:53,190
the seabirds flying...

1196
01:33:04,608 --> 01:33:05,627
Where are they going now?

1197
01:33:05,651 --> 01:33:09,026
Both seen driving away, silver Porsche
sports coup�

1198
01:33:09,193 --> 01:33:10,819
Furthermore, there are also

1199
01:33:11,069 --> 01:33:14,669
various charges relating to the
theft of certain items of gents' clothing

1200
01:33:14,903 --> 01:33:17,320
including an ecclesiastical vestment,

1201
01:33:17,529 --> 01:33:19,196
and of a wallet containing

1202
01:33:19,405 --> 01:33:21,989
approximately �1,230 in cash.

1203
01:33:22,697 --> 01:33:26,299
Do you wish to say anything? You're not
obliged to unless you wish to do so.

1204
01:33:26,323 --> 01:33:30,273
But whatever you say will be taken down
in writing and may be given in evidence.

1205
01:33:30,366 --> 01:33:32,075
Go right, right.

1206
01:33:34,118 --> 01:33:36,993
- Right?
- Eh? No, no left. Left!

1207
01:33:43,661 --> 01:33:50,537
My lovely day, my lovely day.