1
00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:40,960
SEAGULLS CALL
2
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,960
{\an8}Is he really here?
He is, yeah.
3
00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,960
{\an8}Do you think he got my letter
at the North Pole?
4
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:50,640
{\an8}Of course he did.
5
00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:52,960
{\an8}Daddy, did you write him a letter?
6
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,000
{\an8}Er, no. I didn't, James, no.
Oh.
7
00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:57,960
{\an8}Oh, look at that.
8
00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:01,960
{\an8}Haven't they done a wonderful job
with the tree this year? Hm.
9
00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:04,960
{\an8}CAROLLERS:
Looked out on the Feast of Stephen
10
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:08,960
{\an8}
Deep and crisp and even...
11
00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:09,960
TURKEY GOBBLES
12
00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:13,000
Hey, fancy guessing the weight
of the turkey, Doc?
13
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,960
One pound, two guesses.
No.
14
00:01:15,960 --> 00:01:18,960
He's very friendly. Turns out
turkeys got a lot of personality.
15
00:01:18,960 --> 00:01:22,960
Hm. Make sure you wash your hands.
They're filthy.
16
00:01:22,960 --> 00:01:24,320
TURKEY GOBBLES
17
00:01:24,320 --> 00:01:26,960
CAROLLERS CONTINUE
18
00:01:27,960 --> 00:01:30,960
Has there always been Christmas?
19
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:32,160
Yeah.
Er, no.
20
00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:33,960
Well, not ALWAYS always.
21
00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:35,960
No, it used to be called
the Winter Solstice,
22
00:01:35,960 --> 00:01:36,960
but in the fourth century,
23
00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:39,960
Pope Julius chose
the 25th of December for Christmas
24
00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:42,800
because he wanted to replace
the pagan Saturnalia festival.
25
00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:44,960
James!
26
00:01:44,960 --> 00:01:47,000
Jenny.
Hi!
27
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,960
Mm, delicious!
Careful, Doc!
28
00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:52,960
Another inch,
you're under the mistletoe.
29
00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:55,960
Anyone who wanted
could lay a smacker on you.
30
00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:57,800
SHE GULPS
What?
31
00:01:57,800 --> 00:01:59,960
Mrs Tishell...
32
00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:03,960
No, I'm fine, Doc. I'm just fine.
33
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,960
It's so nice to see you here, Doc.
34
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,480
How long has this food been outside?
35
00:02:08,480 --> 00:02:09,960
Only since this morning.
36
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,960
You should wear a hair net.
It's unhygienic.
37
00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:16,000
CAROLLERS:
Eight maids a-milking
38
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,960
Six geese a-laying
39
00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:23,320
40
00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:25,960
I think that's my favourite song.
41
00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:27,960
Yeah, as Christmas ones go,
it's all right.
42
00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:30,960
No, not my favourite Christmas song.
My favourite song ever.
43
00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:34,960
This guy buys this girl
all these amazing gifts.
44
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,960
Five gold rings,
four calling birds,
45
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:41,960
three French men...
It's so romantic.
46
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:44,800
I got you some eggnog.
47
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:46,960
Oh, yeah, thanks.
48
00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:48,480
Happy Christmas!
49
00:02:48,480 --> 00:02:50,800
Oh, hello, James! Ha-ha.
50
00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:52,960
Are you here to see Santa?
51
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,960
That'll be £10, please, Doc.
52
00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:56,800
£10?
Yeah.
53
00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:57,960
Oh... It's fine. Thanks.
54
00:02:57,960 --> 00:02:59,960
Thank you.
55
00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:01,960
£10, really (!)
56
00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:03,960
Merry Christmas, Doc.
57
00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:06,960
And what do you want for Christmas?
58
00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:09,320
Oh, an actual list. Excellent.
59
00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:11,960
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
Laura, look this way.
60
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:13,960
And here's your present.
61
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:15,960
Yeah, don't forget.
62
00:03:15,960 --> 00:03:17,960
Merry Christmas. Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
63
00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:19,960
Urgh, look at him.
Martin.
64
00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:24,960
He keeps scratching.
65
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,480
What, Santa?
66
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,640
Well, he's probably just hot
under the lights.
67
00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:30,960
Disgusting!
Oi, Doc, move up.
68
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,960
Ah, what do we have here?
69
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:37,960
A smartly dressed young man
with a very nice tie.
70
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:39,960
Did you tie that yourself?
71
00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:41,960
How wonderful.
72
00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:42,960
And what do you want for Christmas?
73
00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:45,960
Look, don't, Martin.
Excuse me.
74
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,000
I'm afraid you'll
have to join the queue, big boy.
75
00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:50,640
You keep scratching.
Is there something wrong?
76
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:53,320
Santa's got a new costume
and the material's a bit itchy.
77
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:56,000
Now, come and tell Santa
what you want for Christmas.
78
00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,960
Uh-uh, no. Don't go any closer.
79
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,960
He could be contagious. Let me see.
80
00:03:59,960 --> 00:04:01,960
You're being ridiculous.
Show me, please.
81
00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,960
Doc, you're holding up the line!
Leave Santa alone!
82
00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:09,960
Leave it, Martin.
Excuse me, what's the hold-up?
83
00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:11,960
Here, Doc, you're gonna
have to come out of there.
84
00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,960
This man has a potentially
infectious disease.
85
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,960
That rash could be shingles,
erysipelas or scabies.
86
00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:19,960
A virus, a bacteria or a parasite.
87
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,960
Do you really want to infect
your children? Do you?
88
00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:24,960
Right, I want you to come with me.
Seriously?
89
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,160
Seriously. Come with me.
You need to fumigate this place.
90
00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:28,960
Doc, I think you're over-reacting,
just a tad.
91
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:32,000
Shut it down. Come on.
Sorry, he does mean well.
92
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,960
Right, you heard what the doc said.
Everybody out.
93
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:37,960
Come on now. Out you go.
I'm sorry, no returns.
94
00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:40,960
That's what I said, no returns.
I'm sorry, don't be sad.
95
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,000
We'll come back next year.
96
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:45,960
There'll be other Santas,
other grottos.
97
00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,960
You get on the examination table,
please.
98
00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:51,960
Take off your boot
and roll up your trouser leg.
99
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:56,480
How long have you had this for?
A week or so.
100
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:59,160
I'm sorry, I can't hear what you're
saying. Take that beard off.
101
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,160
Probably allergic to the material
in the costume.
102
00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,960
Do you have a history of allergies?
103
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:12,960
No. Do you have a history
of ruining Christmas?
104
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:14,640
I didn't ruin Christmas.
105
00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:17,160
All those traumatised children
who saw you drag away Santa
106
00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:18,960
might well disagree on that.
107
00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:20,960
It doesn't look like
an allergic reaction to me.
108
00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:24,000
I'll do a punch biopsy.
A biopsy?
109
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:26,640
Won't I have to go to hospital
for that?
110
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:29,000
Er, no.
This has a blade which removes
111
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,960
a small plug of skin through
the epidermis and the dermis,
112
00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:33,640
into the subcutaneous fat below.
113
00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:37,000
Do you have any other symptoms?
At my age, there's always something.
114
00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:39,960
Aches and pains, wear and tear.
115
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:44,960
I lost some weight. Stomach's been
a bit dodgy. Probably nerves.
116
00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:45,960
Nerves?
117
00:05:45,960 --> 00:05:49,960
My job is to bring joy and wonder
to the children of Portwenn.
118
00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:50,960
I take that seriously.
119
00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:53,960
Do you suffer from fatigue?
I don't suffer, Doc.
120
00:05:53,960 --> 00:05:55,960
I enjoy the work.
121
00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:58,960
But, yes, it does take a lot
out of me, I suppose.
122
00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:02,960
Right, I'll take a blood sample,
check if you're anaemic or not.
123
00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:06,640
Poke away. So long as it lets me
get back out there and do my job.
124
00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,960
Er, no, you're not to mix
with children, I'm afraid.
125
00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:10,960
Until we've discovered
if you're infectious or not.
126
00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:17,160
I-I've got a big surprise lined up
for the village on Christmas Eve.
127
00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:18,960
I really don't wanna let folk down.
128
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:21,960
I'm sorry, you're not going anywhere
until we have your test results.
129
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:23,960
I should have the blood
available tomorrow
130
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:25,960
and the biopsy sometime next week.
131
00:06:25,960 --> 00:06:27,960
Not a fan of Christmas, are you?
132
00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:30,800
I don't have any feelings about it
either way.
133
00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:32,800
Doesn't come across my desk.
134
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:37,320
Somebody needs to show you
the true magic of the season, Doc.
135
00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:39,960
I'm sure they do, thank you.
And we're finished for now.
136
00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:47,960
Close the door on your way out,
please.
137
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:01,960
How are you?
138
00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,960
Is Santa angry at us?
139
00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,960
No, of course not.
140
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:10,480
I didn't get to meet him.
141
00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:13,960
I'm sorry. It's such a shame.
142
00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:16,960
Here, come and sit down.
143
00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:22,000
Aw...
144
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:24,960
You know, when I was your age,
145
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:27,640
Portwenn used to have
a lantern parade on Christmas Eve.
146
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:28,960
And it was so lovely.
147
00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:31,480
All these lights
would be coming down the hill,
148
00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:33,640
with Santa Claus at the front.
149
00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:35,960
Can we do that?
150
00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:41,960
Well, no, cos someone would need
to arrange and organise it.
151
00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,960
You could.
Oh, I didn't mean me.
152
00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:47,960
And I could get to meet Santa.
153
00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:48,960
Well, yeah, you could,
154
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,960
but it's Christmas Eve tomorrow,
so...
155
00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,000
Please.
156
00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:56,960
..so I suppose
I'd better get a move on, right?
157
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:58,960
Yes.
158
00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:04,960
Tomorrow? That's short notice.
159
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,960
I just want James to have
a Christmas he won't forget.
160
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,160
You know, I have all these
happy memories of it as a child.
161
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:13,960
You know, the parade and the lights.
162
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,160
And I still remember the little
red bike my father gave me
163
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,960
when I was four.
164
00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:20,640
Yes, probably stolen.
Martin!
165
00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:22,960
PHONE RINGS
166
00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:28,960
Ellingham.
167
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,480
Yes.
168
00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:31,960
I am.
169
00:08:35,160 --> 00:08:36,960
Ah...
170
00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:38,160
I see.
171
00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:41,960
Right.
172
00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:43,960
When would that be?
173
00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:47,960
Yes. I see.
174
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:50,960
Thank you.
175
00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:54,960
Everything OK?
176
00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:59,000
Er, that was the, er,
London Royal Hospital.
177
00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:03,480
My mother died of a heart attack
at 11 o'clock this morning.
178
00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:07,960
Oh, Martin...
179
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,160
I'm so sorry.
180
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,160
I should tell Ruth, I suppose.
181
00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:19,960
After lunch, maybe.
182
00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:24,160
Come here.
183
00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:32,960
It's... I don't want the fish
to get dry.
184
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,160
There goes the Grinch.
CHUCKLING
185
00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:48,960
Thanks for ruining Christmas!
186
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,000
Tosser!
Tosser! Tosser!
187
00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:57,960
KNOCK AT DOOR
188
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:04,960
Hello, Martin. Come in.
Thank you.
189
00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:09,960
You'll have to forgive me.
I'm experimenting with eggnog.
190
00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:12,960
What is it?
191
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:17,960
Er, my mother suffered a
heart attack this morning and died.
192
00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:20,800
Oh, dear.
193
00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:23,160
I'm sorry to hear that.
Mm.
194
00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:24,960
Erm...
195
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,960
Oh, when will the funeral be?
196
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,960
Sometime between Christmas
and the new year.
197
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:32,960
May I ask how you're feeling?
198
00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:36,320
Erm, I'm-I'm fine.
We weren't very close.
199
00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:37,960
She was your mother.
200
00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,000
She stole my clock.
201
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,960
Don't be too hard on yourself,
Martin.
202
00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:46,960
Grief has a way
of stealing up on us all,
203
00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:48,960
even when we think we're free of it.
204
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:50,960
Honestly, I'm fine.
205
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:52,960
Poor Margaret.
206
00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:57,960
I always hoped that she'd become
the mother that you deserved, but...
207
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,960
Oh, well,
I won't speak ill of the dead.
208
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,960
She was an awful woman
and a terrible mother.
209
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:08,960
I thought
you weren't going to speak ill.
210
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:10,960
I was being polite.
211
00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:19,320
'How much?'
212
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:21,960
No, but seriously.
213
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:25,960
Look, I know it's short notice,
but...
214
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:27,960
I'm gonna have to call you back.
215
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:31,960
Hello, Louisa.
What can I do for you?
216
00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:35,960
Joe, you've, er,
got a little something on your face.
217
00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:39,160
It's for, erm, undercover work.
218
00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:41,960
Well, I'm here because
I'd like to organise
219
00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:43,960
a lantern parade for tomorrow.
220
00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:45,960
A lantern parade?
Haven't had one of those for years.
221
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,960
Unfortunately,
from a police standpoint,
222
00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:49,960
tomorrow's just not possible.
223
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:53,640
Oh... Oh, that's a shame.
Mm.
224
00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:56,000
Because I was gonna ask you
to be Santa and lead the parade.
225
00:11:56,000 --> 00:12:00,960
Well, when I say not possible,
I mean not...
226
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:02,960
NOT possible.
227
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:04,960
So it... it is possible?
228
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:06,960
I'm here to help. What do we need?
229
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,960
Well, we need lanterns.
About 40 or 50.
230
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:12,480
No problem. I'll talk to Bert.
Great. And can you spread the word?
231
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,960
Just to confirm,
I shall be playing Santa Claus
232
00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:16,960
and leading the parade?
233
00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:19,960
Yeah.
Wonderful.
234
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:23,960
You know, between you and me,
it's not really for undercover work.
235
00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,160
I know. I can see your costume
hanging up at the back.
236
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:31,960
Ha, very good.
You should be a policeman.
237
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,960
HUMMING A TUNE
238
00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,960
SHE GULPS
239
00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:50,960
GAGGING
240
00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:55,960
Mrs Tishell, I've come
to pick up my medical supplies
241
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:56,960
for the holiday period.
242
00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:01,000
What are you doing? Mrs Tishell?
243
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:02,960
You're choking.
244
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:04,960
Turn round.
245
00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:15,000
Got it?
Oh... Oh...
246
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:17,960
Right, just let go.
Oh, thank you, Doctor.
247
00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:18,960
Let go. Let go of my arms.
248
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:21,960
HOARSELY: Oh, thank you, Doctor.
It went down the wrong way.
249
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:25,800
You were choking before as well.
250
00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:27,960
Well, I-I-I do need
to take more care in future.
251
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:29,960
Why is your voice hoarse?
252
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:33,480
Cos I was singing carols yesterday.
You saved my life, Doctor.
253
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,960
Come here into the light.
Oh...
254
00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:40,960
Mmm... Mm, mm, mm!
255
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:43,960
No, no, no!
256
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:45,960
But the mistletoe...!
No!
257
00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:47,960
No, I'll come and collect
my supplies later.
258
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:49,960
I'm sorry, Doc! I-I had to.
259
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:51,960
Cos this might be my last...
260
00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,960
my last Christmas.
261
00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:00,960
There you go, John.
Cheers, Bert. Merry Christmas.
262
00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:05,960
I know the doc has a job to do,
but so do I.
263
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:09,960
And it's not fair, you know?
It's just not fair.
264
00:14:09,960 --> 00:14:11,960
Yes, we know.
You keep on saying, Leonard.
265
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:15,960
Sorry. Don't mean to go on about it.
It's all right.
266
00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:18,000
If you can't go to your local
for a drink and a moan,
267
00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:21,000
where can you go?
It's good to see you in here again.
268
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:22,960
It's been a while.
269
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:24,960
It's the children I feel sorry for.
270
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:27,960
It's a bit of magic in their lives.
271
00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,960
Takes me months to make these.
272
00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:33,000
I don't blame the doc.
273
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:35,960
No, he's to be pitied.
274
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:37,960
He just...
275
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:40,800
He just doesn't get it.
276
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:44,480
But don't worry,
Santa isn't done yet.
277
00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:46,320
Oh!
278
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:48,960
I think Santa's done for the day
at least.
279
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:51,320
Best go home and sleep it off, eh?
280
00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:54,960
This isn't like you.
Do you need me to call you a taxi?
281
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,960
No, it's OK.
282
00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:58,960
I've got a sleigh.
283
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:01,960
Sorry, she kissed you?
Yeah.
284
00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:03,480
On the cheek or...?
285
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,960
No, no, no. On the...
Smack on the mouth.
286
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:08,960
Maybe she was aiming for the cheek.
No, she wasn't.
287
00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:09,960
It was quite shocking.
288
00:15:09,960 --> 00:15:11,960
And there was this peculiar
metallic tang,
289
00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:13,960
which didn't make it any better.
290
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:15,960
I'm not sure I wanna know
all the details now, thank you.
291
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:17,960
Oh, I don't blame you.
292
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:20,960
Did she say why she did it?
Something about mistletoe.
293
00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:22,960
FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
294
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:25,800
I've brushed my teeth
and I'm ready for bed.
295
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,480
Oh, would you like me
to come and read to you?
296
00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:28,960
No.
It's the new one.
297
00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,960
I said NO.
298
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:32,960
James, you don't raise your voice
to your father.
299
00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:34,960
LOW RUMBLING,
STONES CLATTERING
300
00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:36,960
What is that?!
Oh, my God!
301
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:40,480
THUDDING
It's coming from upstairs.
302
00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:42,960
It's on the roof.
It's Santa Claus!
303
00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:44,960
Don't be ridiculous.
304
00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:45,960
DOG BARKING
305
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:48,960
Ho-ho-ho!
306
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:52,640
What are you doing up there?!
307
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:55,960
I'm showing you
the magic of Christmas!
308
00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:57,160
Well, get down, right now.
309
00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,960
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
310
00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:03,960
What's going on? I saw the commotion
from The Platt. Wait, is that...?
311
00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:05,960
It's Santa Claus!
312
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:07,960
Well, maybe to the untrained eye.
313
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,960
You need to get up there
and get that man down.
314
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:11,960
He is drunk, he's a danger
to himself and my property.
315
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:14,960
Follow me.
Please don't hurt Santa.
316
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:18,960
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
317
00:16:27,960 --> 00:16:29,960
All right, Leonard?
318
00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:31,960
That's not my name.
319
00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:33,960
All right... Santa?
320
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:36,960
Why don't you just come over here
321
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:38,960
nice and slowly...?
Is he coming?
322
00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:43,000
That man needs to learn
the true meaning of Christmas.
323
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,960
Oh, he just wants to teach you
the true meaning of Christmas.
324
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:48,960
No, get back up there,
go and get him!
325
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:51,960
OK, OK. Ah, ah...
326
00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:57,960
Ah...
327
00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:01,960
Well... unless
the true meaning of Christmas
328
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:04,960
is that he's gonna
get his chimney blocked,
329
00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:07,320
I suggest...
330
00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:09,960
Oh, that's a big drop!
331
00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:14,960
It could... It could
make you feel a bit, a bit...
332
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:17,960
Whoa!
PANTING
333
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:19,960
Don't let go, Leonard!
334
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:20,960
That's not my name!
335
00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:23,000
Santa! Don't let go, Santa!
336
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,960
I won't.
HE GRUNTS
337
00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:26,960
Oh, God.
338
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:29,960
Oh, oh, oh...
Argh...
339
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:32,960
Whoops.
Oh, don't say whoops! Argh!
340
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:34,640
Ah, ah, ah...
341
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:38,480
Thanks, Doc. It wasn't me.
342
00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:41,960
It was just everything
started moving. I went dizzy.
343
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:43,800
It's vertigo.
344
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,000
And you're drunk and a disgrace.
Come down.
345
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:47,960
Merry Christmas, Doc!
346
00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:55,960
What on Earth were you thinking of?
Sorry, Doc.
347
00:17:55,960 --> 00:17:58,960
I suppose I get a bit emotional
this time of the year.
348
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:00,960
I had a few drinks.
349
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:04,160
Normally don't touch the stuff.
A few drinks? You're drunk.
350
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:05,960
It was only two.
351
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:07,960
Really? Well, you must have
a very low tolerance for alcohol.
352
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:09,960
I suggest you keep avoiding it.
353
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:13,000
That was incredibly irresponsible.
The harm you could've done yourself
354
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:15,640
or Penhale.
Not to mention my family.
355
00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:17,320
Lucky I was there to save you.
356
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,960
Right, come on, I'll drive you home.
357
00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:24,960
At least your son got to see Santa.
358
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:27,320
Yes, if he'd been really lucky,
he'd have seen Santa
359
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:28,960
fall off the roof
and break his neck.
360
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:35,960
James...
361
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,960
HE SIGHS
362
00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:06,960
Look what Santa brought...
363
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:21,640
Hello?
364
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:23,960
Hello?
365
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,480
DOG BARKS
366
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,960
DOG BARKS,
GROWLS
367
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:31,960
DOG BARKS
368
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:33,960
No! Ow!
369
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:35,000
Out, out, OUT!
370
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:37,960
Why is it in here?
I wonder what's wrong.
371
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:40,960
It's a dog. That's what's wrong.
It's always barking.
372
00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:42,960
No, it's-it's not always barking.
373
00:19:42,960 --> 00:19:45,960
And it's never at this time
in the morning.
374
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,960
BARKING CONTINUES
375
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:49,960
Martin?
Yes.
376
00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:52,960
James has gone!
What? Where?
377
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:56,480
I don't know, he's left this note.
It says he's gone to the North Pole.
378
00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:59,960
Oh, James is a smart, sensible boy,
he wouldn't do that.
379
00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:02,640
He's not in his room and
you're literally holding a note
380
00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:04,320
saying he's gone.
All right, I'll get dressed
381
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:05,800
and we'll go and find him.
382
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:07,960
Yeah, maybe he's just
hiding in the house somewhere.
383
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:10,960
James, James!
Come on, hurry up. James!
384
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:12,960
He's never done
anything like this before.
385
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:14,960
I think it's cos
his head's been filled with
386
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:16,960
all this Father Christmas stuff.
387
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:19,960
Well, you're the one who practically
dragged Santa out the grotto,
388
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:21,960
then shouted at him yesterday.
389
00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:23,960
Well, he was on our roof!
390
00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:25,960
But James doesn't get that.
He just..
391
00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:28,960
He just sees you ruining Christmas.
I'm not ruining Christmas!
392
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:31,960
Is it so bad that he might enjoy it?
393
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:34,960
Even you must have some
happy memories of it as a child.
394
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:36,960
No, I don't.
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
395
00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:39,960
Well, isn't that a good reason
to make sure that James and Mary do?
396
00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:41,960
Ruth.
397
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:44,160
Yes.
398
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,960
We're on our way.
399
00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,960
She's got him.
She's giving him breakfast.
400
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,160
Oh, thank goodness.
Right, but I'll pick him up.
401
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,960
I'm sorry, Martin, it's just
that under the circumstances,
402
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,960
I think it's better
that I go there alone.
403
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:56,960
Right.
404
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:01,960
DOG BARKS
405
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:03,960
Shut up.
406
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:18,960
Oh, good morning, Doc.
Oh, you're all wet.
407
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:20,960
I want to talk about yesterday.
408
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:23,960
Oh, s... Oh, I'm so sorry.
I'm very sorry.
409
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:28,960
Erm, I know it was unprofessional
and that you're probably very angry.
410
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:32,960
Unless you're not... and you want
to suggest that we elope together,
411
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:36,160
slipping away into the night...
No. No. No!
412
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:39,960
When you forced your mouth
against mine yesterday,
413
00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:41,960
I noticed a strong acidic taste.
414
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:44,960
And yesterday I saw you choke twice,
on two different occasions.
415
00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:46,960
Also, your voice is very hoarse.
416
00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:48,640
Well that's cos I've been
singing carols.
417
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,960
And I am sorry,
but I have to close for lunch.
418
00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:52,960
It's 8:15 in the morning.
419
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,960
Well, I'm... I'm not ill, Doctor.
420
00:21:56,960 --> 00:21:58,960
Do you get a sensation
like there's a lump in your throat
421
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:00,960
when you swallow?
No.
422
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:04,960
No, because that would be
very worrying if I thought that...
423
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:07,480
Yes.
424
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:09,960
You can read me like a book, Doctor.
425
00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:11,960
Hmm. Let me take a look.
426
00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:14,960
Ah, oh...
427
00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:20,800
I first noticed it
a couple of weeks ago.
428
00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:23,160
And I feel something
every time I swallow.
429
00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:27,960
{\an8}An enlarged lymph node.
I know what that means, Doctor.
430
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:30,000
Stop talking. Open your mouth
and tilt your head back.
431
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:31,960
Don't try to kiss me.
432
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:34,960
Ahh!
Swallow.
433
00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:38,960
SHE GULPS
Yes. You have GORD.
434
00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:40,960
Gastroesophageal reflux disease.
435
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:42,960
I'll prescribe Omeprazole,
but we should keep an eye on it.
436
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:44,960
Chronic inflammation
of the oesophagus over time
437
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,960
could lead to more serious
complications and damage.
438
00:22:47,960 --> 00:22:52,960
What, so, basically...
439
00:22:52,960 --> 00:22:54,160
heartburn?
440
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:55,960
Yes.
I'm not dying?
441
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:58,800
No, not yet. Hold still.
442
00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:04,960
Mm. Normal movement.
443
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:06,960
Your prolapsed disc
must have healed.
444
00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:08,960
You don't need to wear
the neck brace any more.
445
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,480
Oh, I-I-I think
just to be on the safe side...
446
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:13,320
There is no safe side.
You just don't need to.
447
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:17,960
Maybe just pop it back on
for a few minutes. Not more, I-I...
448
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:19,960
If you have an issue
with taking it off,
449
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,960
then I can refer you to
a clinical psychologist if you like.
450
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:26,960
No. There's no need for that.
451
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:28,960
Consider it gone.
452
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:33,640
And thank you, Doctor, for your
infinite patience and understanding.
453
00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:34,960
Yes.
454
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:56,960
Medical supplies, please.
455
00:23:56,960 --> 00:23:58,960
Yes, Doctor.
456
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,960
Thank you.
457
00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:12,960
I was just coming back
from the newsagents
458
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:14,960
and I saw him
strolling down the street.
459
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,640
I managed to persuade him
to have some breakfast
460
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:20,960
before he continued his journey
to the North Pole.
461
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:23,960
WEATHER REPORT ON TV:
'..freezing conditions, sub-zero.
462
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,960
'And you can see there's
a strong band of low pressure...'
463
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:28,960
What you did was very wrong, James.
464
00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:32,480
You can't just go walking off
like that.
465
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:34,960
Mummy and Daddy were very worried.
466
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:36,960
'..with a good chance of some snow
on the higher ground.
467
00:24:36,960 --> 00:24:38,960
'And that's gonna give some of us
in Cornwall...'
468
00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:40,640
It says it might snow.
469
00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:41,960
'..a white Christmas...'
470
00:24:41,960 --> 00:24:43,960
You won't need to go to
the North Pole now, will you?
471
00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:46,000
Doesn't matter. I hate Christmas!
472
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:47,960
He's just like his father.
473
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:49,960
Well, no. No, he's not, Ruth.
474
00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:52,960
Because, actually, Daddy's very much
looking forward to seeing Santa
475
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:53,960
at the parade tonight as well.
476
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,640
Really?
477
00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:56,960
Of course.
478
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,960
So, why don't you go and clean up
your bowl and we'll get on home?
479
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:09,960
SONG: 'Twelve Days Of Christmas'
480
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:18,960
SHE SCREAMS,
CHICKENS CLUCK
481
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:20,480
FLAPPING
482
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:21,960
SHE WHIMPERS
483
00:25:28,960 --> 00:25:29,960
'Be honest, Doc, how bad is it?'
484
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:32,960
It's just a few minor scratches.
Oh, God.
485
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:35,320
I've probably caught
all kinds of horrible diseases.
486
00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:37,960
Diseases from birds are usually
spread by inhaling the dust
487
00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:38,960
from their droppings.
488
00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:41,480
Worst a scratch'll do is give you
a mild superficial infection.
489
00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:43,320
Did you just say super-infection?
490
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:44,960
No, I said superficial infection.
491
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,480
This is hardly the emergency
you said it was.
492
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:49,960
Hello, hello, hell...! Oh.
493
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,160
Oh, Doc, what are you doing here?
What's happened?
494
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,960
Some psycho left birds in a box
to attack me.
495
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:56,960
They didn't attack you.
They scratched you.
496
00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:57,960
The doc's right.
497
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,960
Bit soon to be using
inflammatory language like psycho.
498
00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:03,960
Maybe someone
just wanted to give you a gift.
499
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:06,960
What, a gift of three chickens?!
And then there's the note.
500
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:09,960
"This is only the beginning."
That's a threat if ever I heard one.
501
00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:11,960
Bye.
Er, no. Wait up, Doc.
502
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:15,640
Er, Louisa asked me to look after
the kids. I'll be safer there.
503
00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:16,960
Joe, deal with those.
504
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:19,640
CHICKENS CLUCK
505
00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:25,640
Oh. Good morning!
Oh, hello, Agatha.
506
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:28,960
I'm afraid the surgery isn't open
till after Christmas now.
507
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:32,960
Oh, no, I've come to see you.
Official Parish Council business.
508
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:34,960
Oh, right. OK.
509
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,960
Of course. Erm...
510
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:37,960
She does realise
511
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:41,960
that that turkey is gonna end up
on someone's dinner table?
512
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:45,640
Yeah, course she does.
Who's a good boy? Yeah, you are.
513
00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:47,480
You know, I've made
almost as much from selling
514
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:48,960
guess-the-weight raffle tickets
515
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:51,960
than I have had from selling food
these past few days.
516
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:54,320
The great thing is, the chances
of someone actually guessing
517
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:57,960
the weight of that bird
are close to zero. Oh, dear.
518
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,960
It's a shame that Christmas comes
but once a year.
519
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:02,960
Here we go. Pop it over there.
520
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:07,960
I got some battery lanterns,
candle ones,
521
00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:09,960
and some of those fancy sky ones.
522
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:12,960
Here, were they expensive?
523
00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:15,800
It doesn't matter, Bert.
It's Christmas.
524
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:18,960
We're not gonna charge for them.
Oh, no, of course not.
525
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:23,960
TURKEY CLUCKS,
GOBBLES
526
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:27,960
Sorry, Agatha, we had a little bit
of an incident here today.
527
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:29,960
Oh.
SHE CHUCKLES
528
00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:32,960
Would you like some tea?
Oh, no, thank you.
529
00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:34,960
I understand you're planning
a lantern parade this evening?
530
00:27:34,960 --> 00:27:36,960
Yes. Well, it's a bit last-minute,
531
00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,960
but it's all coming together,
touch wood.
532
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:42,960
CHUCKLING: How wonderful.
Although, you know the rules.
533
00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:45,960
You haven't lodged your event
notification form with the council
534
00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:48,960
60 days prior to the event
and had it ratified.
535
00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:53,320
No. I thought as it's just a few
people walking down the street...
536
00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:55,960
Oh... A few people
walking down the street...
537
00:27:55,960 --> 00:28:00,640
It's a bit like saying a rock
concert is a few people in a field.
538
00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:05,960
Agatha, James is really
looking forward to this.
539
00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:07,960
I know the village feels the same.
540
00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:10,960
And it really will just be
a few people with lanterns...
541
00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:13,000
Hi, guys.
542
00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:15,960
Martin, this is Agatha.
She's from the Parish Council.
543
00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:17,960
Doctor Ellingham.
Yes.
544
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:19,480
Apologies if I look
a little flustered.
545
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:21,960
I've just been attacked
by some birds.
546
00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:23,000
Oh, my.
It was nothing.
547
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:25,800
Oh, sure!
"Lose one eye, get another."
548
00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:26,960
That must have been horrible.
549
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,960
Those awful things
with their mean, little beaks
550
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:30,960
and lifeless, black eyes.
551
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:33,960
I know!
Thankfully, Janice survived.
552
00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:36,960
I know she's really looking forward
to the parade as well.
553
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:37,960
I'm not really that bothered...
554
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:41,160
But, yes, very much so.
555
00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:43,960
Janice, can you check on Mary,
please?
556
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:44,960
Yes.
557
00:28:49,480 --> 00:28:52,960
Is there any way we can get the
event signed off by this evening?
558
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:55,160
This isn't about paperwork.
559
00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,960
This is about
the safety of the village
560
00:28:57,960 --> 00:29:00,000
during the most dangerous time
of the year.
561
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:02,960
Well, I'm not sure
Christmas is that dangerous.
562
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:04,000
Oh, really?
563
00:29:04,000 --> 00:29:07,960
Over-eating.
People drinking too much alcohol.
564
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,960
Suppose there is
a little bit of that, yeah.
565
00:29:09,960 --> 00:29:11,960
Then there's injuries
from putting up decorations,
566
00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:15,960
injuries from taking them down,
candles, fires, indigestion,
567
00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:19,960
food poisoning, allergies, choking,
slipping on snow, slipping on ice...
568
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:21,960
Have you ever seen
a Christmas tree catch alight?
569
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:24,640
I don't know why people have them
in their homes.
570
00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:27,480
They're incendiary devices.
And don't forget batteries,
571
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:28,960
which children seem to swallow
all day long
572
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:30,800
during the Christmas holidays,
573
00:29:30,800 --> 00:29:31,960
leaking corrosive acid
into the stomach
574
00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:33,960
and destroying its lining.
They're quite lethal.
575
00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:36,960
I did forget them!
Thank you, doctor.
576
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:39,480
Yes, thank you, Martin (!)
577
00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:42,640
You know, we've got a meeting now
about the parade.
578
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:46,320
Why don't you come along and see
that there's nothing to worry about?
579
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:48,960
I suppose I could.
Great.
580
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:51,000
Martin, try and speak to James.
Make sure he's OK.
581
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:52,960
Yes.
582
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:55,640
Come along, we should get going.
Oh. Um...
583
00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:58,960
So, if nobody wins,
do we get to keep Toby?
584
00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:00,960
I don't know.
I hadn't really thought about it.
585
00:30:00,960 --> 00:30:02,960
Chances are
someone's guessed it correctly.
586
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:05,960
Maybe. Maybe not.
587
00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:07,960
The plan is for people
to start at the school
588
00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:11,320
and make their way down here
to the Christmas tree at The Platt.
589
00:30:11,320 --> 00:30:14,320
That's relatively straight-forward.
Yeah, yeah, well, it is.
590
00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:16,960
So, we all set, Louisa?
Not quite.
591
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:20,320
Apparently, we need permission
from Portwenn Parish Council.
592
00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:23,960
Erm, Agatha, you know Joe Penhale
and Bert Large, don't you?
593
00:30:23,960 --> 00:30:25,960
I am aware of them both, yes.
594
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:29,640
What safety procedures
have you in play for the parade?
595
00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:35,960
Well... they're just walking
from up there to there, so...
596
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:38,960
I thought I'd use the 1986
Public Order Act as my framework.
597
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:42,960
Although, for me, the 1936 original
was far more effective.
598
00:30:42,960 --> 00:30:44,800
But then I'm just a police officer
599
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:46,960
with the lowest crime rate
in Devon and Cornwall
600
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:47,960
five years running,
so what do I know?
601
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:49,960
That's true.
602
00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:50,960
High-vis jackets?
603
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,640
Please! I don't get out of bed
in the morning
604
00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:54,960
without a high-vis jacket on.
605
00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:56,960
LAUGHTER
606
00:30:56,960 --> 00:30:59,960
Have you got
a health and safety protocol?
607
00:30:59,960 --> 00:31:01,960
Er, no, not as such.
608
00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:05,960
But then, you know,
we-we only had a day and...
609
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:07,960
Well, so what?
So what?!
610
00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:10,960
Yes. So what!
You know, the village needs this.
611
00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:14,320
To be able to come together
and celebrate as a community.
612
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:16,960
The benefits surely
outweigh the risks.
613
00:31:16,960 --> 00:31:19,960
Agatha, you're the only person
that can make it happen.
614
00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:21,480
Or not.
615
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:24,960
I suppose it's only a short walk.
616
00:31:24,960 --> 00:31:27,320
Great. So we're OK for tonight?
617
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:29,960
TURKEY GOBBLES
Is that a turkey?
618
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:33,960
Er, excuse me, why have you got
livestock next to a food truck?
619
00:31:33,960 --> 00:31:35,640
It's unhygienic.
620
00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:39,800
He's called Toby and he's not
unhygienic, he's very clean.
621
00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:41,960
I gave him a bath this morning.
And we're just weighing him
622
00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:43,960
to see if anyone's
won the competition.
623
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:46,960
What competition?
Well, guess its weight correctly
624
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:48,960
and it could end up on your table
this Christmas.
625
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:50,160
Unfortunately, nobody got it right.
626
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:52,800
Here, have a go. On the house.
627
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:54,160
Oh, I don't know...
628
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:56,000
Nine pounds, 11 ounces.
629
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:00,960
That is amazing.
How did you do that?
630
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:02,960
Wait, I won?!
631
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:05,960
I don't like birds,
and definitely not that one.
632
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:07,160
He's not asking you
to look after it.
633
00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:08,960
It's for Christmas lunch.
634
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:10,960
Yeah, we'll get the butcher
to deliver it later.
635
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:12,960
Or you could have the satisfaction
of knowing you were correct
636
00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:14,960
and leave it at that.
637
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:17,960
Mor, it is a turkey, it's Christmas.
It's had a good, long life.
638
00:32:17,960 --> 00:32:20,960
Not that long. Christmas turkeys
are usually five months old.
639
00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:25,000
Well, we've all learned something
new today. So, the parade...
640
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:27,960
So, the butcher will kill it
and chop it up for me?
641
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:29,960
Yeah. All part of the prize.
642
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:31,960
See what it's like
when a community comes together.
643
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:33,960
AGATHA CHUCKLES
644
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:35,960
He does seem like
a healthy specimen.
645
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,320
TURKEY GOBBLES
Oh, my! Oh!
646
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,960
Mr Maitland,
this is Doctor Ellingham.
647
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:53,960
I have your test results.
648
00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:56,160
Can you please call me
as soon as you get this? Thank you.
649
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,480
DOG BARKS
James...
650
00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:00,960
Can you ask your dog to be quiet,
please?
651
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:01,960
DOG WHIMPERS
652
00:33:01,960 --> 00:33:03,000
James?
653
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:08,320
James?!
654
00:33:11,960 --> 00:33:12,960
DOG BARKS
655
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:14,960
Downstairs, shoo!
656
00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:17,960
Hello, James.
657
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:21,960
You're upset with me.
658
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:26,160
Mmm.
659
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:36,800
When I was your age,
I'd wake up on Christmas morning...
660
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:41,160
..and at the end of my bed,
every year,
661
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:45,960
was a stocking with an orange
and a pencil set in it.
662
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:49,960
And I'd run down to
my mother and father's room...
663
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:52,960
..but...
664
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:54,960
But what?
665
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:57,960
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
666
00:33:57,960 --> 00:33:58,960
Excuse me.
667
00:33:59,960 --> 00:34:00,960
Yes.
668
00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:03,960
Right.
669
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:06,960
Yes.
670
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:08,960
Oh, I'm sorry, there's an emergency.
I have to go.
671
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,960
Janice is downstairs
if you need anything.
672
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:14,960
And we'll, erm...
Er, we'll talk again. Well done.
673
00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:16,960
Off, shoo, downstairs!
674
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:18,960
DOG BARKS,
JAMES SIGHS
675
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:22,960
OK, Agatha, I need you
to remain still, yeah?
676
00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:24,960
Just try not to move.
677
00:34:24,960 --> 00:34:26,000
SHOUTING: Out of the way,
coming through!
678
00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:29,800
You can probably hear somebody
barking at people. That's the doc.
679
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:31,960
Er, she's had a fall. She's got
a cut on the back of her head.
680
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,960
I've tried to stem the blood,
but I think she's concussed.
681
00:34:34,960 --> 00:34:36,640
Well done.
Anybody called an ambulance?
682
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:37,960
On its way, Doc.
683
00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:40,160
Do you know where you are?
Turkey.
684
00:34:40,160 --> 00:34:42,960
I think she means the bird, Doc,
not the country.
685
00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:44,960
I won it from the food truck.
686
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:46,640
Told you.
Yes, shush.
687
00:34:46,640 --> 00:34:48,480
I never won anything before!
688
00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:49,960
Keep still and stop talking.
689
00:34:51,960 --> 00:34:54,960
Sorry, I hate to do this,
but do we have the Parish go-ahead
690
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:56,960
for the parade?
691
00:34:56,960 --> 00:34:59,320
Oh, Louisa, really?
Not now, come on. Sorry.
692
00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:00,960
SHE MUTTERS
693
00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:04,960
What did that mean?
694
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:06,960
I'm pretty sure it was a yes.
695
00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:08,960
You're just saying that
cos you wanna be Santa Claus.
696
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:13,960
Yes, I am.
Because you're right, Louisa.
697
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:15,960
We deserve this. All of us.
698
00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:19,960
Do you really wanna tell James that
this has been cancelled as well?
699
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:22,640
You're trying
to emotionally manipulate me.
700
00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:25,320
Is it working?
Might be, yeah.
701
00:35:25,320 --> 00:35:29,000
Because... technically,
Agatha didn't say no...
702
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,960
Everyone! The parade's still on.
Joe, no, that's not what I meant...
703
00:35:31,960 --> 00:35:34,960
Right, let's get to work. Come on!
OK, then.
704
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:38,960
Mor, what are you doing?
705
00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:41,960
Oh, I-I thought I'd drive him
to the butcher's myself.
706
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:43,480
Well, I-I can do that.
707
00:35:43,480 --> 00:35:44,960
Yeah, erm...
708
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:46,960
I know it's silly, but I...
709
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:48,960
I just want a chance to say goodbye.
710
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:51,960
What, to the...?
711
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:53,960
Right, OK. I understand.
712
00:35:53,960 --> 00:35:56,960
But, I mean, it is a...
It's a turkey at Christmas.
713
00:35:56,960 --> 00:35:57,960
Yeah, I know.
714
00:35:57,960 --> 00:35:59,960
Just take it easy. Rest up.
715
00:35:59,960 --> 00:36:01,960
Erm, avoid the bumpy roads.
Keep it smooth.
716
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:03,960
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
Yes, Doc.
717
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:05,960
We know how to drive an ambulance.
718
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:07,640
Ellingham.
719
00:36:07,640 --> 00:36:11,960
Doc, it's Leonard Maitland.
You left a message?
720
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:14,000
Ah, Mr Maitland, yes.
Your test results have come back.
721
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:16,800
It's bad news, isn't it?
722
00:36:17,960 --> 00:36:20,960
To be honest, I've been
having dizzy spells all day.
723
00:36:20,960 --> 00:36:22,960
It's made working in the garage
really tricky.
724
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:25,960
If you're feeling dizzy,
you shouldn't be up and about.
725
00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:26,960
Yeah, all right...
726
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:30,960
'I'll go and get a seat.'
727
00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:35,960
CLATTERING
728
00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:37,960
Oh, oh...
729
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:39,960
Mr Maitland? What's happened?
730
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:44,960
Just fell over and took
the shelf down with me and...
731
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:45,960
Oh, no.
732
00:36:51,960 --> 00:36:53,960
Doc, I don't wanna panic here,
733
00:36:53,960 --> 00:36:56,160
but there's a massive cut in my leg
and a lot of blood.
734
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:02,960
I'll just try and patch myself up.
735
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:04,960
'Bleeding everywhere here.'
736
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:06,960
Right, put pressure on the wound
and keep the leg raised.
737
00:37:06,960 --> 00:37:07,960
I'll call an ambulance.
738
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:09,960
Er, I'm sure it'll be fine.
739
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,800
'Er, no. Your blood test showed
that you're grossly anaemic.
740
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:13,960
'You can't afford
to lose any more blood.'
741
00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:16,960
It's not like as I could
bleed to death, is it?
742
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:20,000
Ah, well, in a worst-case scenario,
er, yes. In a few hours.
743
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:21,960
Then can you please
get off the phone
744
00:37:21,960 --> 00:37:23,960
and call me a bloody ambulance!
745
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:24,960
Yes!
746
00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:27,960
TURKEY CLUCKS
747
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:30,960
I don't want you to go,
but this is the only way.
748
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:35,960
And I just wanna say thank you.
749
00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:38,960
I didn't think I was ready, but...
750
00:37:38,960 --> 00:37:41,480
I hadn't actually finished yet,
Toby.
751
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:45,960
It's fine.
TURKEY CHATTERS
752
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:47,160
Bye, then.
753
00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:48,960
TURKEY GOBBLES
754
00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:54,960
No, no fireworks.
And no sky lanterns.
755
00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:57,960
Hang on a minute! I can get
a really good deal on those.
756
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:00,960
We don't wanna take anyone's
attention away from the parade.
757
00:38:00,960 --> 00:38:02,960
Louisa, excuse me.
Martin, I'm in a meeting.
758
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:05,640
Yes, forgive me.
759
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:07,960
Sorry.
760
00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:09,960
There's been an accident
at Leonard Maitland's
761
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:11,960
and the only ambulance in the area
is tied up with, erm...
762
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:14,960
er, whatshername, so I'm gonna
have to drive up there myself.
763
00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:16,960
Oh, dear, that sounds serious.
Yes, it is.
764
00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:18,960
Will you be back
in time for the parade?
765
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:20,960
Erm, yes, I should be.
766
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:23,320
Er, but if I'm not...
you'll tell James, will you?
767
00:38:23,320 --> 00:38:25,960
It'll be fine. He's fine. Just go.
768
00:38:42,960 --> 00:38:44,960
All OK with the butcher?
769
00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:47,960
You're not gonna believe me.
Toby escaped.
770
00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:48,960
What?
771
00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:51,960
Yeah, so I got to the butcher
and then he just sprung out the cage
772
00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:53,800
and flew away.
773
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:55,960
You're right, I don't believe you.
774
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:57,960
SCREAMING
Is that Janice?
775
00:38:57,960 --> 00:38:59,960
God.
776
00:38:59,960 --> 00:39:00,960
Come on!
777
00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:08,960
What is it?
778
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,160
Oh, that's really nice.
779
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:12,800
Nice?
780
00:39:12,800 --> 00:39:14,960
Someone breaks in
and leaves more birds for me
781
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:16,960
after the last lot
almost blinded me?
782
00:39:16,960 --> 00:39:19,960
It was a tiny scratch. On your hand.
783
00:39:19,960 --> 00:39:22,160
Maybe you should speak to Joe.
784
00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,960
I already have. But you know
what the police are like.
785
00:39:24,960 --> 00:39:26,960
They've always got
more important things to do.
786
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:30,480
It's just that doves are a symbol,
aren't they, of, er, of love?
787
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:31,960
So?
788
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:33,640
So maybe speak to Joe.
789
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,800
Uh, I just told you, I already have.
790
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:37,960
Is he feeling OK?
791
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:39,160
SCREAMING
792
00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:41,960
PHONE RINGING OUT
793
00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:46,960
Mr Maitland?
794
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:50,960
Can you hear me?
795
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:52,160
Mr Maitland?
796
00:39:53,960 --> 00:39:56,960
If you can hear me,
I'm almost with you.
797
00:39:56,960 --> 00:39:58,960
TURKEY CLUCKS
798
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:14,960
TURKEY CHATTERS
799
00:40:19,960 --> 00:40:21,960
WIND WHISTLES
800
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:25,960
HE GROANS
801
00:40:33,960 --> 00:40:35,800
HE MUTTERS
802
00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:45,960
RAGGED BREATHING,
WIND WHISTLES
803
00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:48,960
ENGINE HISSES
804
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:52,960
HE GROANS
805
00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:16,960
HE YELPS
806
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:18,960
Argh!
807
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:30,160
I was just coming to find you.
How's your day been?
808
00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:31,960
Terrible.
Really?
809
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:33,960
What, nothing special happened
or...?
810
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:37,480
Oh, something special happened.
That psycho struck again.
811
00:41:37,480 --> 00:41:39,000
He left two more scary birds
in the salon.
812
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:41,960
OK. What type of birds?
813
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:43,960
I don't know, doves or something.
814
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:45,960
Well, doves are nice.
815
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:48,960
Doves, pigeons, rats, bats -
they're all the same.
816
00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:50,960
When I find out who did this,
they're dead.
817
00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:53,960
Well, maybe if you just
think about it...
818
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:55,960
I am thinking about it!
I can't stop, it's driving me nuts.
819
00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:58,960
Look, if you can't be bothered
to find out who's stalking me,
820
00:41:58,960 --> 00:42:00,960
then at least
go and get rid of them!
821
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:02,960
Yeah. I promise.
I'll-I'll sort it out.
822
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:10,960
Ho-ho-ho!
What do you want for Christmas?
823
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:12,960
How far away
is Leonard Maitland's house?
824
00:42:12,960 --> 00:42:16,960
You do realise I'm Santa Claus,
not the wonderful Joseph Penh...
825
00:42:16,960 --> 00:42:18,960
It's about 20 minutes.
826
00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:20,960
It's just Martin drove up there
a few hours ago.
827
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:22,960
He's still not back
and I can't get a hold of him.
828
00:42:22,960 --> 00:42:25,960
Well, signal's terrible up there.
The important thing...
829
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:26,960
Is not to worry. Yes, I know.
830
00:42:26,960 --> 00:42:29,960
The important thing
is that Leonard can't play Santa
831
00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:30,960
because that's my job now.
832
00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:34,960
And, yes, also not to worry.
833
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:38,960
TURKEY CHATTERS,
WIND WHISTLES
834
00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:32,960
ENGINE SPLUTTERS
THEN CUTS OUT
835
00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:37,000
RAGGED BREATHING
836
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:38,960
You always were a fragile child.
837
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:43,960
I'm not one to be critical,
but it was rather embarrassing.
838
00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:46,320
SHAKILY: Hypothermia.
839
00:43:46,320 --> 00:43:47,960
Hmm?
840
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:52,640
Oh, I've been out in the cold
for nearly two hours
841
00:43:52,640 --> 00:43:54,960
and my body temperature's dropped.
842
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:55,960
And my pulse rate's decreased.
843
00:43:55,960 --> 00:43:58,960
And my pupils are dilated.
844
00:43:58,960 --> 00:44:01,960
My reflexes seem unaffected, though.
845
00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:03,960
Oh, for goodness' sake.
846
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:05,960
Can't you even say hello?
847
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:08,960
Erm.. You're not a person.
You're a symptom.
848
00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:10,640
SHE SCOFFS
849
00:44:10,640 --> 00:44:12,320
That's a dreadful thing to say
to your mother.
850
00:44:12,320 --> 00:44:16,960
Hypothermia can lead to
disorientation and hallucinations.
851
00:44:16,960 --> 00:44:20,960
You always have an excuse for
everything. It's rather tiresome.
852
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:24,960
Right now, my primary concern
is to get the engine started
853
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:26,960
and the heat on again.
854
00:44:26,960 --> 00:44:29,960
And if you don't manage that?
855
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:33,960
My core temperature
could drop to a level
856
00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:36,960
where it's unable
to produce sufficient heat,
857
00:44:36,960 --> 00:44:41,960
which ultimately would lead to
my vital organs failing and then...
858
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:43,160
Death?
859
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:45,960
Yes.
860
00:44:45,960 --> 00:44:47,960
How long do you have?
861
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:50,960
About an hour.
862
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:53,960
Maybe less.
863
00:44:54,960 --> 00:44:55,960
That's not helpful.
864
00:44:55,960 --> 00:44:59,960
Oh, Martin! What makes you think
I'm here to help?
865
00:44:59,960 --> 00:45:01,960
WIND WHISTLES
866
00:45:09,480 --> 00:45:12,960
Do you think he'll be upset
if you don't make it home?
867
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:13,960
Who?
868
00:45:13,960 --> 00:45:15,960
James.
869
00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:17,960
I will make it back.
870
00:45:17,960 --> 00:45:20,320
You don't seem that upset
about my passing.
871
00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:23,960
And it's not as if you're
a better parent to James.
872
00:45:23,960 --> 00:45:24,960
That's not true.
873
00:45:24,960 --> 00:45:28,960
He's already begun to resent you,
Martin.
874
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:30,960
That's a disease that spreads.
875
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:33,960
One that I doubt
even you know how to cure.
876
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:38,960
How old were you when you realised
we didn't love you?
877
00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:42,960
Look what Santa brought.
878
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:45,640
'Was it on one of those
Christmas Day mornings,
879
00:45:45,640 --> 00:45:48,640
'when you woke up and found us gone?
880
00:45:49,960 --> 00:45:51,960
'You can't blame us, Martin.
881
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:56,960
'We were happy before you arrived.'
882
00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:57,960
Hello?
883
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:02,960
We just wanted to enjoy
one special day a year,
884
00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:05,960
when we could be free from you.
885
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:08,480
Be quiet. You're not real.
886
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:11,960
Which, on the balance of things,
is even more disturbing, isn't it?
887
00:46:11,960 --> 00:46:13,960
ENGINE STARTS
888
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:16,960
What a clever boy.
889
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:18,160
CAR BEEPS,
ENGINE STOPS
890
00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:20,960
Well, maybe not.
891
00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:25,960
What are you doing?
892
00:46:25,960 --> 00:46:29,320
My patient is anaemic.
I have to make sure that he's safe.
893
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:32,960
You can't go out there.
You've already tried and failed.
894
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:34,000
Then I'll try again.
895
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:35,960
And you'll freeze to death.
896
00:46:35,960 --> 00:46:39,960
Now, sit back here
and listen with Mother.
897
00:46:39,960 --> 00:46:42,960
Just for the record...
I forgive you.
898
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:45,800
No, you don't.
Oh, shut up!
899
00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:03,960
You ready to go to the parade?
900
00:47:03,960 --> 00:47:05,000
Just fixing my beard.
901
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:06,960
HE CHUCKLES
902
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:09,960
Do I look OK?
903
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:11,960
I don't know. I suppose so.
904
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:14,640
I'm sorry.
It's this whole stalker thing.
905
00:47:14,640 --> 00:47:15,960
It's got me all anxious.
906
00:47:15,960 --> 00:47:17,960
It's over, Janice.
907
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:19,960
You just have to trust me.
908
00:47:19,960 --> 00:47:21,960
It's all over.
909
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:28,000
Right, I couldn't get you
a partridge.
910
00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:30,960
What I have got you is a pheasant,
which is basically
911
00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:32,960
the Rolls Royce of partridges.
912
00:47:34,160 --> 00:47:35,960
Did you not get my message?
913
00:47:35,960 --> 00:47:38,960
Yeah. No more birds to the salon.
So I've, er, brought it here.
914
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:40,960
Just "no more birds".
915
00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:43,960
Well, you've paid for them and
you're not getting your money back.
916
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:48,960
Oh, my God.
917
00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:49,960
You're my stalker.
918
00:47:51,960 --> 00:47:54,960
What's wrong with you? Why would you
want to torture me like this?
919
00:47:54,960 --> 00:47:56,320
It was meant to be romantic.
920
00:47:56,320 --> 00:47:58,960
What's romantic about
being attacked by chickens?
921
00:47:58,960 --> 00:48:00,960
Not chickens. Hens.
922
00:48:00,960 --> 00:48:04,960
Three Cornish hens
because no-one had any French ones.
923
00:48:04,960 --> 00:48:08,640
And then two doves
and then a pheasant.
924
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:11,960
Because, apparently, they're
the Rolls Royce of partridges.
925
00:48:12,960 --> 00:48:15,960
You know, like the song.
926
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:18,960
Well, then, why didn't you just
tell me, then?
927
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:22,960
Because you were upset and...
928
00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:27,960
..I didn't want to spoil this...
929
00:48:29,640 --> 00:48:30,960
..this moment.
930
00:48:33,960 --> 00:48:35,960
Oh.
931
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:40,960
I know we've tried and failed
before, Janice, but...
932
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:43,960
..I love you.
933
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:49,160
Joe, I can't.
934
00:48:50,960 --> 00:48:52,960
Oh. OK.
935
00:48:52,960 --> 00:48:55,960
OK. That's fine.
936
00:48:55,960 --> 00:48:58,960
I mean the beard. It has to go.
937
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:04,000
So...?
938
00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:05,800
Yes!
939
00:49:10,960 --> 00:49:12,960
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
940
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:15,960
Hello?
941
00:49:15,960 --> 00:49:18,960
Martin, thank goodness.
I was so worried.
942
00:49:18,960 --> 00:49:20,960
BREATHLESSLY: 'I crashed the car.'
943
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:21,960
Oh, my God. Are you OK?
944
00:49:21,960 --> 00:49:23,960
Er, wait a minute.
945
00:49:23,960 --> 00:49:26,960
Hello?
'I'm here, Martin.'
946
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:28,960
I think I have hypothermia.
947
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:30,960
My, er... my mother...
948
00:49:30,960 --> 00:49:32,960
Oh, Martin, I know. I'm so sorry.
949
00:49:32,960 --> 00:49:34,960
No, she came to visit me.
950
00:49:35,960 --> 00:49:37,960
What? What do you mean?
Like, as a ghost?
951
00:49:37,960 --> 00:49:41,960
No, it was a symptom of hypothermia.
952
00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:42,960
She said...
953
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:44,960
She said I was losing James.
954
00:49:44,960 --> 00:49:46,960
She wasn't real, though.
955
00:49:46,960 --> 00:49:50,960
I know. But it doesn't mean
she wasn't right, though, does it?
956
00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:52,960
Martin, where are you now?
957
00:49:53,960 --> 00:49:57,000
Well, the car wouldn't start
and my mother was being annoying,
958
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:59,000
so I was trying to find
Leonard Maitland's house,
959
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:00,960
but I think I'm lost.
960
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:04,960
OK. You need to go back to the car,
yeah, and I'll come and find you.
961
00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:06,960
I'm not entirely sure where I am...
962
00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:09,960
and I-I don't know where the car is.
963
00:50:10,960 --> 00:50:13,960
'Martin? Martin, I can't hear you.'
964
00:50:13,960 --> 00:50:15,960
I can see light.
965
00:50:15,960 --> 00:50:19,800
No, no, no, that doesn't sound good.
Don't go into the light, Martin.
966
00:50:19,800 --> 00:50:21,960
I think it's Leonard Maitland's
house.
967
00:50:21,960 --> 00:50:23,960
All right, in that case,
definitely go towards it
968
00:50:23,960 --> 00:50:25,960
and I'll come collect you now.
969
00:50:25,960 --> 00:50:27,960
No. He needs urgent
medical attention.
970
00:50:27,960 --> 00:50:29,320
That's why I'm here.
971
00:50:29,320 --> 00:50:31,960
Martin, you were just in a crash
and you said you had hypothermia.
972
00:50:31,960 --> 00:50:34,800
I just need to warm up.
973
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:35,960
I'll be fine.
974
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:37,960
Really, you're sure?
975
00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:40,960
Yeah. You can come and get me
after the parade.
976
00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:42,960
'Right, just, please,
just stay in touch.'
977
00:50:42,960 --> 00:50:44,960
DISCONNECTED TONE
978
00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:11,480
Hold on!
979
00:51:14,960 --> 00:51:17,960
Bloody hell, what happened to you?
Come in.
980
00:51:17,960 --> 00:51:19,960
You shouldn't be walking around.
981
00:51:19,960 --> 00:51:21,960
I had to answer the door, didn't I?
982
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:28,960
Lie down there and elevate your leg.
983
00:51:35,320 --> 00:51:36,960
You look awful, Doc.
984
00:51:38,640 --> 00:51:40,960
My car came off the road.
985
00:51:40,960 --> 00:51:42,640
I just need to warm up for a bit.
986
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:45,960
I would make you a hot drink, but...
987
00:51:45,960 --> 00:51:47,960
feel free to help yourself.
988
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:49,800
Thank you.
989
00:51:50,960 --> 00:51:53,960
I'm a bit worried about
your blood loss, though.
990
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:55,960
Let me take your pulse.
991
00:51:59,960 --> 00:52:02,960
Yeah, you don't have a radial pulse.
992
00:52:02,960 --> 00:52:04,960
I'll set up a drip
and get some fluids into you,
993
00:52:04,960 --> 00:52:07,480
but first
I'll have a look at that wound.
994
00:52:07,480 --> 00:52:10,000
Sorry to drag you up here, Doc.
995
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:13,960
It's Christmas Eve.
You should be with your family.
996
00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:14,960
Stop talking.
997
00:52:19,320 --> 00:52:20,960
HE RETCHES
998
00:52:20,960 --> 00:52:22,960
It's bad, right?
999
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:26,960
Yes, you've, er,
torn a varicose vein.
1000
00:52:26,960 --> 00:52:28,960
That's why you're bleeding so much.
1001
00:52:30,960 --> 00:52:31,960
HE GASPS
1002
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,960
Well, yeah, luckily, he's OK,
but it could've been a lot worse.
1003
00:52:37,960 --> 00:52:39,960
Well, that's a relief.
1004
00:52:39,960 --> 00:52:42,960
And don't worry about Mary.
I'm more than happy
1005
00:52:42,960 --> 00:52:44,960
to look after her
while you're at the parade.
1006
00:52:44,960 --> 00:52:46,960
Oh, that's wonderful.
1007
00:52:46,960 --> 00:52:49,960
Oh, hello.
I didn't realise you were here.
1008
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:51,960
Sal dropped in
for some of my eggnog.
1009
00:52:51,960 --> 00:52:54,960
I don't know if the doctor told you?
He did.
1010
00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:56,960
Oh.
1011
00:52:56,960 --> 00:52:58,960
Sorry.
1012
00:52:58,960 --> 00:53:00,960
Why, what happened?
1013
00:53:00,960 --> 00:53:02,960
Oh, it's nothing. Thank you, Ruth.
1014
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:04,960
Come on, James. It's almost time.
1015
00:53:04,960 --> 00:53:07,160
I'm going to see Santa.
1016
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:09,960
Well, tell him I said hello.
1017
00:53:09,960 --> 00:53:11,320
Bye.
1018
00:53:15,960 --> 00:53:16,960
I don't want to pry...
1019
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:20,960
I may have accidentally tried
to kiss the doctor earlier.
1020
00:53:20,960 --> 00:53:22,320
Oh, Sally.
1021
00:53:22,320 --> 00:53:24,320
Well, there was mistletoe.
1022
00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:25,960
And he'd just helped me.
1023
00:53:25,960 --> 00:53:30,800
I had what I thought was
a malignant lump in my throat
1024
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:35,640
and it turned out to be
gastroesophageal reflux disease.
1025
00:53:35,640 --> 00:53:39,320
Well, usually, a handshake
or "thank you very much" will do.
1026
00:53:39,320 --> 00:53:40,960
And he also...
1027
00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:43,960
He said that my prolapsed disc
was healed
1028
00:53:43,960 --> 00:53:46,480
and I don't need to wear
my neck brace any more.
1029
00:53:46,480 --> 00:53:48,960
But I don't know. I just...
1030
00:53:48,960 --> 00:53:51,160
I can't seem to take it off.
1031
00:53:51,160 --> 00:53:53,960
Would you like me to do it?
1032
00:54:00,640 --> 00:54:01,960
Sorry.
1033
00:54:01,960 --> 00:54:02,960
Oh, er...
1034
00:54:02,960 --> 00:54:04,960
Oh-oh-oh, sorry...
1035
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:07,960
I-I know it's stupid
and it's sentimental,
1036
00:54:07,960 --> 00:54:09,960
but, erm...
1037
00:54:11,960 --> 00:54:13,640
..I will miss it.
1038
00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:17,960
It's a permanent symbol
of a medical condition,
1039
00:54:17,960 --> 00:54:21,960
which means it's also
a permanent link to a certain doctor
1040
00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:24,000
you may have feelings for.
1041
00:54:25,960 --> 00:54:27,960
It's not the neck brace
you're giving up...
1042
00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:30,960
..it's Martin.
1043
00:54:42,960 --> 00:54:43,960
Do it.
1044
00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:47,960
Good girl.
Yeah.
1045
00:54:47,960 --> 00:54:50,960
I, no-no...
Stay still.
1046
00:54:50,960 --> 00:54:52,960
I-I-I... Oh, oh...
There.
1047
00:55:10,960 --> 00:55:14,960
You're right, it's time.
1048
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:17,960
Yeah.
1049
00:55:25,960 --> 00:55:27,960
So, you need to rest up.
1050
00:55:27,960 --> 00:55:31,960
No strenuous activity
for at least two weeks.
1051
00:55:31,960 --> 00:55:33,960
No more Santa, then.
No.
1052
00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:38,960
Have you worked out
what this rash is yet?
1053
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:40,960
Er, no, I haven't had
the results back from your biopsy,
1054
00:55:40,960 --> 00:55:43,960
but I'm fairly certain
that it's dermatitis herpetiformis.
1055
00:55:43,960 --> 00:55:46,960
Is it catching?
No.
1056
00:55:46,960 --> 00:55:49,320
So there was no need
to close the grotto down.
1057
00:55:49,320 --> 00:55:51,960
No, no, precautions were necessary.
1058
00:55:51,960 --> 00:55:54,960
Anyway, I think it was just
a symptom of something bigger.
1059
00:55:54,960 --> 00:55:57,960
All indicators point towards
coeliac disease,
1060
00:55:57,960 --> 00:56:00,800
which is a condition
where your immune system
1061
00:56:00,800 --> 00:56:03,960
starts to attack your own tissue
when you eat gluten.
1062
00:56:03,960 --> 00:56:07,960
It would certainly explain
your low blood iron
1063
00:56:07,960 --> 00:56:10,480
and your stomach issues
and your weight loss.
1064
00:56:10,480 --> 00:56:13,160
And your stronger than normal
reaction to wheat-based alcohol.
1065
00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:16,960
My body's attacking itself?
Bloody heck, that sounds serious.
1066
00:56:16,960 --> 00:56:19,480
Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah.
Unless you change your diet,
1067
00:56:19,480 --> 00:56:21,960
you run the risk of malabsorption
and malnutrition.
1068
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:24,000
It can be very serious.
I'll run some tests.
1069
00:56:24,000 --> 00:56:25,960
Urgent tests?
1070
00:56:25,960 --> 00:56:27,320
Not this minute, no.
1071
00:56:27,320 --> 00:56:29,960
Great, so I can drive you
back to the village now,
1072
00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:31,960
seeing as I'm not contagious.
1073
00:56:31,960 --> 00:56:32,960
Ah, no, that won't be necessary.
1074
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:34,960
Louisa's coming to collect me
after the parade.
1075
00:56:34,960 --> 00:56:36,960
After the parade?
1076
00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:39,480
Doc, it's Christmas Eve.
1077
00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:41,960
I'm more than grateful,
you risking yourself,
1078
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:44,960
coming up here and stitching me up,
but you should be with your family.
1079
00:56:44,960 --> 00:56:47,960
Yes, now I appreciate that,
but I need to be thorough.
1080
00:56:50,800 --> 00:56:51,960
Doc...
1081
00:56:51,960 --> 00:56:53,960
I hate Christmas. I always have.
1082
00:56:53,960 --> 00:56:56,800
What do you mean?
1083
00:56:56,800 --> 00:56:58,960
See, my wife loved it.
1084
00:56:58,960 --> 00:57:00,960
I was only ever Santa to please her.
1085
00:57:00,960 --> 00:57:03,960
And to be honest,
I still couldn't stand it.
1086
00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:06,960
I'd moan, complain,
you know how it is.
1087
00:57:08,640 --> 00:57:13,960
Then, five years ago, she died.
December the 23rd, without warning.
1088
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:16,960
Yes, I remember, it was very sad.
1089
00:57:16,960 --> 00:57:20,000
After that,
putting on the beard, the suit,
1090
00:57:20,000 --> 00:57:22,960
becoming someone else for a while,
well, it was an escape.
1091
00:57:25,960 --> 00:57:29,960
And once I stopped fighting it,
I started to get it.
1092
00:57:29,960 --> 00:57:33,960
Making toys for the kids,
giving folk some happy memories...
1093
00:57:33,960 --> 00:57:38,960
it's... it's a privilege, Doc.
An honour.
1094
00:57:38,960 --> 00:57:41,960
I just wish I'd understood that
when she was still alive.
1095
00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:48,960
Yes, well, erm... I'm sorry, you'll
have to wait until next year now.
1096
00:57:48,960 --> 00:57:50,960
And is that your plan?
1097
00:57:50,960 --> 00:57:52,960
Wait until next year
1098
00:57:52,960 --> 00:57:55,960
and MAYBE celebrate Christmas
with your family then?
1099
00:57:55,960 --> 00:57:57,960
I had an emergency to attend to.
1100
00:57:57,960 --> 00:57:59,960
And now the emergency's over.
1101
00:57:59,960 --> 00:58:00,960
Er, yeah, well, even if I...
1102
00:58:00,960 --> 00:58:03,960
Even if I... I mean, it's just...
It'll be just too late now.
1103
00:58:03,960 --> 00:58:05,640
It wouldn't be too late
if you left right now.
1104
00:58:05,640 --> 00:58:07,800
I still have to run those tests
on you.
1105
00:58:07,800 --> 00:58:08,960
The tests can wait.
1106
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:13,160
You're avoiding your family
1107
00:58:13,160 --> 00:58:15,960
because you don't want
to ruin things for them.
1108
00:58:19,960 --> 00:58:22,960
Do you wanna know what
the true magic of Christmas is?
1109
00:58:22,960 --> 00:58:24,480
It's being exactly who you are,
1110
00:58:24,480 --> 00:58:26,960
but, still,
your family want you around,
1111
00:58:26,960 --> 00:58:28,960
even if you are
an irritating bugger.
1112
00:58:30,800 --> 00:58:32,160
That truly is a miracle.
1113
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:36,960
And sometimes we don't know how
lucky we are until it's too late.
1114
00:58:40,960 --> 00:58:44,960
The only way you can ruin their
Christmas is by not being there.
1115
00:58:46,960 --> 00:58:49,960
Yes, I see what you mean.
1116
00:58:49,960 --> 00:58:51,960
Great. Now,
it's gonna be cold out there,
1117
00:58:51,960 --> 00:58:53,960
so we'll need to wrap up.
1118
00:58:53,960 --> 00:58:55,960
You're not coming. You need
to recuperate and rest that leg.
1119
00:58:55,960 --> 00:58:58,160
Doc, it's Christmas Eve.
I have plans.
1120
00:58:58,160 --> 00:59:00,960
Absolutely not.
I'm the one with the wheels.
1121
00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:03,960
Either we go together,
or we don't go at all.
1122
00:59:15,960 --> 00:59:17,960
Here we go. I've got some spares.
1123
00:59:18,960 --> 00:59:20,960
As I was saying, it'll be cold,
1124
00:59:20,960 --> 00:59:22,960
on account of there
being no windscreen.
1125
00:59:22,960 --> 00:59:23,960
What?
1126
00:59:24,960 --> 00:59:27,960
Maybe better I just show you, Doc.
1127
00:59:33,960 --> 00:59:34,960
Really?!
1128
00:59:34,960 --> 00:59:38,960
Mind out, it's Santa coming through.
It's Santa coming through.
1129
00:59:38,960 --> 00:59:40,960
Attention, please.
1130
00:59:40,960 --> 00:59:44,960
Attention, everyone.
The parade is about to begin.
1131
00:59:44,960 --> 00:59:46,160
CHEERING
1132
00:59:46,160 --> 00:59:49,960
But before we begin,
I'd like to make a little speech.
1133
00:59:49,960 --> 00:59:50,960
This is boring!
I'm cold.
1134
00:59:50,960 --> 00:59:52,800
Ten years ago...
1135
00:59:52,800 --> 00:59:54,960
Santa? Maybe we could just,
you know, begin?
1136
00:59:54,960 --> 00:59:57,960
Well, we'll begin
when Santa says so.
1137
00:59:57,960 --> 01:00:00,960
All those in favour
of starting the parade, say aye!
1138
01:00:00,960 --> 01:00:02,480
ALL: AYE!
1139
01:00:02,480 --> 01:00:04,960
OK, everybody behind me,
stay in formation!
1140
01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:06,960
What about Daddy?
1141
01:00:06,960 --> 01:00:09,960
Yeah, he said he really wanted
to be here, but...
1142
01:00:09,960 --> 01:00:13,960
Don't worry about Daddy, little man.
Santa's here now.
1143
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:17,960
Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas!
1144
01:00:17,960 --> 01:00:21,960
Merry Christmas, everyone!
1145
01:00:21,960 --> 01:00:23,960
Ho-ho-ho!
What the...?
1146
01:00:23,960 --> 01:00:26,960
Sit down! Your leg!
You'll burst the stitches.
1147
01:00:26,960 --> 01:00:28,960
Keep your eyes on the road.
1148
01:00:28,960 --> 01:00:33,960
Merry Christmas, everybody!
1149
01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:36,960
Presents for everyone!
Martin?!
1150
01:00:36,960 --> 01:00:38,800
Hello.
1151
01:00:38,800 --> 01:00:42,960
Merry Christmas! Ho-ho-ho!
1152
01:00:42,960 --> 01:00:44,960
Merry Christmas!
Put your seatbelt on.
1153
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:47,960
Come on, Doc!
All right.
1154
01:00:47,960 --> 01:00:51,960
CHEERING
1155
01:00:51,960 --> 01:00:54,960
All together now! Ho-ho-ho!
1156
01:00:54,960 --> 01:00:56,960
PARADERS:
1157
01:00:56,960 --> 01:01:01,960
In a one-horse open sleigh, hey!
1158
01:01:01,960 --> 01:01:05,960
Jingle all the way
1159
01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:08,960
In a one-horse...
1160
01:01:08,960 --> 01:01:11,960
Told you I'd show you
the magic of Christmas, didn't I?
1161
01:01:11,960 --> 01:01:15,960
Er, yes. Yes, you did, yes.
But take it easy. Stay here.
1162
01:01:15,960 --> 01:01:17,320
Best seat in the house, Doc.
Yeah.
1163
01:01:17,320 --> 01:01:19,960
Mummy!
Did you enjoy that? Did you?
1164
01:01:20,960 --> 01:01:24,960
Well, that was quite an entrance.
I wanted to be here on time.
1165
01:01:24,960 --> 01:01:26,960
Daddy!
1166
01:01:30,960 --> 01:01:32,960
Did you enjoy that?
Yes!
1167
01:01:37,960 --> 01:01:39,960
There we go, my love,
you take care now.
1168
01:01:39,960 --> 01:01:41,960
I thought I said no sky lanterns.
1169
01:01:41,960 --> 01:01:44,960
During the parade, yes.
But the parade's over now.
1170
01:01:44,960 --> 01:01:47,960
Oh, come on. It's Christmas,
everybody's enjoying themselves.
1171
01:01:47,960 --> 01:01:48,960
No means no!
1172
01:01:48,960 --> 01:01:51,960
You know what, you're a great Santa.
1173
01:01:53,960 --> 01:01:55,960
Really?
Best we've ever had.
1174
01:01:56,960 --> 01:01:59,960
Well, I suppose you have already
given them out, haven't you?
1175
01:01:59,960 --> 01:02:02,960
So...
Here, go on. On the house.
1176
01:02:02,960 --> 01:02:05,960
Thanks. Merry Christmas, Bert.
1177
01:02:05,960 --> 01:02:07,960
And Merry Christmas to you, too.
1178
01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:13,960
OK. I believe you.
The turkey escaped.
1179
01:02:13,960 --> 01:02:16,960
I let it go.
Oh, I knew it, Mor. I knew it.
1180
01:02:16,960 --> 01:02:18,960
I'm sorry.
1181
01:02:18,960 --> 01:02:22,960
I think I was just feeling
a bit broody and hormonal.
1182
01:02:22,960 --> 01:02:24,960
Right, yeah.
1183
01:02:24,960 --> 01:02:27,960
You know, because of the baby.
1184
01:02:29,960 --> 01:02:31,960
What, the... the baby turkey?
1185
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:35,960
No.
What, er...?
1186
01:02:40,960 --> 01:02:44,960
I was gonna wait till Christmas Day
to tell you, but, erm...
1187
01:02:44,960 --> 01:02:46,480
surprise!
1188
01:02:47,960 --> 01:02:48,960
Baby.
1189
01:02:48,960 --> 01:02:50,960
Yeah, a baby...
What?
1190
01:02:50,960 --> 01:02:53,960
Our baby.
Oh, Mor! Mor!
1191
01:02:56,960 --> 01:02:58,960
We're getting married. Again.
1192
01:02:58,960 --> 01:03:01,480
Congratulations, again!
Can I tell 'em?
1193
01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:05,960
We're having a baby!
Oh, it's not a competition, Al.
1194
01:03:05,960 --> 01:03:08,960
Well...
Congratulations!
1195
01:03:11,960 --> 01:03:14,480
Here, take this.
1196
01:03:16,960 --> 01:03:18,960
You know, some people,
when they light these lanterns,
1197
01:03:18,960 --> 01:03:20,960
they like to dedicate them
to people.
1198
01:03:20,960 --> 01:03:25,320
Absent friends or family...
or maybe someone they've lost.
1199
01:03:26,960 --> 01:03:29,960
I'm not sure if my mother
would appreciate a lantern.
1200
01:03:30,960 --> 01:03:32,960
It's not for her, Martin.
1201
01:03:52,960 --> 01:03:53,960
Thank you.
1202
01:03:57,960 --> 01:03:58,960
I love you.
1203
01:03:59,960 --> 01:04:01,960
I love you, too, Martin.
1204
01:04:07,960 --> 01:04:09,960
Hang on!
1205
01:04:09,960 --> 01:04:11,960
That one, where's it going?
1206
01:04:11,960 --> 01:04:13,960
Is that your lantern burning up?
1207
01:04:15,960 --> 01:04:18,960
Yeah, it looks like it's falling.
1208
01:04:18,960 --> 01:04:22,960
As long as the wind doesn't catch it
and it lands in the sea.
1209
01:04:24,960 --> 01:04:26,960
I think it's coming this way.
1210
01:04:32,160 --> 01:04:34,960
Oh, that's bad.
Oh, dear.
1211
01:04:35,960 --> 01:04:38,960
Erm, sorry. Sorry, everybody,
but I, er...
1212
01:04:38,960 --> 01:04:40,960
James!
1213
01:04:40,960 --> 01:04:43,960
Martin! James! James, come here.
1214
01:04:45,960 --> 01:04:48,800
Where's Penhale?
Penhale, call the fire brigade!
1215
01:04:48,800 --> 01:04:50,960
Everybody, stand back. Stand back!
1216
01:04:55,640 --> 01:04:57,800
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