1 00:00:08,708 --> 00:00:11,708 == HACKS == Season 1 - Episode 4 2 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Episode Title: "D'Jewelry" Aired on: May 20, 2021 3 00:00:31,875 --> 00:00:33,166 - Hi, Mommy. 4 00:00:33,250 --> 00:00:35,041 - Hi, DJ. 5 00:00:38,666 --> 00:00:40,583 - So you hear "resort collection" 6 00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:42,541 and your brain automatically goes to, 7 00:00:42,625 --> 00:00:44,416 "I got the color palette for this. 8 00:00:44,500 --> 00:00:46,250 Pastels." Right? 9 00:00:46,333 --> 00:00:47,625 - Yeah, you've got-- 10 00:00:47,708 --> 00:00:49,166 yeah, you've got some great ones in there. 11 00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,583 - Well, that's where you're wrong. 12 00:00:50,666 --> 00:00:52,125 And now you're thinking, "Oh, shit. 13 00:00:52,208 --> 00:00:53,750 "If I'm wrong about pastels, 14 00:00:53,833 --> 00:00:56,083 then it's got to be gem tones." 15 00:00:56,166 --> 00:00:57,791 And see, now you're getting warmer. 16 00:00:57,875 --> 00:00:59,500 But what I would say to that is, 17 00:00:59,583 --> 00:01:01,458 "Go ahead and drop the 'tones.'" 18 00:01:01,541 --> 00:01:05,000 This year's theme is simply 'gems.'" 19 00:01:05,083 --> 00:01:06,375 - Ah. - Look. 20 00:01:06,458 --> 00:01:07,708 I mean, look at this piece right here. 21 00:01:07,791 --> 00:01:09,000 Are you seeing this? 22 00:01:09,083 --> 00:01:10,500 This is just straight-up wearable art. 23 00:01:10,583 --> 00:01:11,875 - Yeah. 24 00:01:11,958 --> 00:01:13,833 - And it just-- it screams D'Jewelry. 25 00:01:13,916 --> 00:01:16,791 Don't you agree? - It does. 26 00:01:16,875 --> 00:01:18,500 It does. - Okay. 27 00:01:18,583 --> 00:01:20,250 - Are you putting an apostrophe in that word? 28 00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:22,958 I forget. - Yeah, "D'Jewelry." 29 00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:24,666 - Oh, mm-hmm. 30 00:01:24,750 --> 00:01:26,875 - So what do you think? 31 00:01:27,541 --> 00:01:29,875 - I think that juice is just sugar, 32 00:01:29,958 --> 00:01:32,083 and I think you know that. 33 00:01:32,166 --> 00:01:34,041 - Mom. 34 00:01:34,125 --> 00:01:36,000 About the collection. 35 00:01:36,875 --> 00:01:40,958 - I think it is absolutely you, honey. 36 00:01:41,041 --> 00:01:42,291 - Okay! 37 00:01:42,375 --> 00:01:43,750 Okay, I'll send you the whole look book. 38 00:01:43,833 --> 00:01:45,166 It's a really big file, 39 00:01:45,250 --> 00:01:46,541 so you let me know if you need me to zip it. 40 00:01:46,625 --> 00:01:48,791 - Oh, please zip it. - I'll zip it. 41 00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:50,125 I'll zip it, no problem. - Okay. 42 00:01:50,208 --> 00:01:51,416 - The hard copy's still being bound. 43 00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:52,708 Don't even get me started. 44 00:01:52,791 --> 00:01:54,083 I threw a fucking fit at Kinko's. 45 00:01:54,166 --> 00:01:55,708 Don't worry, it was a whole thing. 46 00:01:55,791 --> 00:01:57,083 And I have to say, 47 00:01:57,166 --> 00:01:58,875 this is gonna be huge for QVC as well 48 00:01:58,958 --> 00:02:01,833 because they could really use a young, fresh-faced designer. 49 00:02:01,916 --> 00:02:03,333 - Yeah. 50 00:02:03,416 --> 00:02:05,333 - So you'll talk to 'em? 51 00:02:05,416 --> 00:02:06,291 - Sure. 52 00:02:06,375 --> 00:02:08,000 - Thank you so much. 53 00:02:08,083 --> 00:02:09,333 I really appreciate it. 54 00:02:09,416 --> 00:02:10,958 Just with Dad dying and everything, 55 00:02:11,041 --> 00:02:13,875 I mean, I could just really use a win. 56 00:02:15,875 --> 00:02:18,416 God, this shit is so cool. 57 00:02:18,500 --> 00:02:19,666 Did you see this one? 58 00:02:26,208 --> 00:02:29,458 - So I found someone who wants to rent your LA place. 59 00:02:29,541 --> 00:02:31,541 - Oh, shit, really? Thank you so much. 60 00:02:31,625 --> 00:02:33,208 - Also, I took down a wall in the kitchen. 61 00:02:33,291 --> 00:02:36,208 It begged me to do it. - What? No! You can't-- 62 00:02:36,958 --> 00:02:39,125 Oh, wow, that's-- that's actually much better. 63 00:02:39,208 --> 00:02:40,166 - I know. 64 00:02:42,291 --> 00:02:43,666 - Oh, my God. 65 00:02:43,750 --> 00:02:45,083 We didn't even have to go through security? 66 00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:46,541 Amazing. 67 00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:49,166 Holy shit, this is nice. 68 00:02:49,250 --> 00:02:51,625 - I know. Epstein estate sale. 69 00:02:51,708 --> 00:02:53,333 - No! - No. 70 00:02:53,416 --> 00:02:56,166 Stop acting like a hillbilly and sit down. 71 00:02:58,333 --> 00:02:59,750 - All right, Barry, come on. 72 00:02:59,833 --> 00:03:00,958 Come on, let's go. 73 00:03:01,041 --> 00:03:03,083 - Uh-uh, that's his seat. 74 00:03:07,958 --> 00:03:10,541 She didn't know. It's okay. 75 00:03:10,625 --> 00:03:11,750 Baby boy. 76 00:03:11,833 --> 00:03:14,958 You're mommy's big, handsome boy. 77 00:03:19,500 --> 00:03:21,083 Okay, the first thing that we're gonna be selling 78 00:03:21,166 --> 00:03:22,541 is foot spas. 79 00:03:22,625 --> 00:03:24,583 - Okay, foot spa. 80 00:03:24,666 --> 00:03:27,375 Um, let's see. 81 00:03:27,458 --> 00:03:31,958 Feet, toes, pedicure... 82 00:03:32,041 --> 00:03:33,458 - Wow. 83 00:03:33,541 --> 00:03:35,916 It's like watching Picasso sing. 84 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,125 - You mean paint? - No. 85 00:03:39,541 --> 00:03:41,541 - Okay, um... 86 00:03:41,625 --> 00:03:43,625 oh, what about something about WikiFeet? 87 00:03:43,708 --> 00:03:45,166 Like, um, 88 00:03:45,250 --> 00:03:47,625 "Ladies, use this and your tootsies will look so good, 89 00:03:47,708 --> 00:03:49,250 you'll break WikiFeet." 90 00:03:49,333 --> 00:03:50,708 - What's WikiFeet? 91 00:03:50,791 --> 00:03:51,958 - Oh, um, 92 00:03:52,041 --> 00:03:53,083 so you know how, like, 93 00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:54,625 some men are horny for feet? 94 00:03:54,708 --> 00:03:55,833 - Sure. 95 00:03:55,916 --> 00:03:57,166 - So it's Wikipedia 96 00:03:57,250 --> 00:03:59,041 but for celebrity feet. 97 00:03:59,125 --> 00:04:00,625 - Jesus. 98 00:04:01,916 --> 00:04:03,041 Am I on it? 99 00:04:03,125 --> 00:04:04,875 Yes. 100 00:04:04,958 --> 00:04:06,875 - Hmm. 101 00:04:06,958 --> 00:04:08,125 Oh, but the next thing-- 102 00:04:08,208 --> 00:04:09,500 I really want to push this too-- 103 00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:14,750 is the progesterone drink packets. 104 00:04:14,833 --> 00:04:16,125 - What is this? 105 00:04:16,208 --> 00:04:18,083 - That is the Tahitian grapefruit flavor. 106 00:04:18,166 --> 00:04:20,916 - No, like, what's a progesterone packet? 107 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:22,541 - Well, progesterone is the female hormone 108 00:04:22,625 --> 00:04:23,916 that allows women to get pregnant 109 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:25,833 and to stay looking young. 110 00:04:25,916 --> 00:04:27,291 But then when menopause starts, 111 00:04:27,375 --> 00:04:29,166 your body stops producing progesterone 112 00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:30,375 and everything kind of goes to hell. 113 00:04:30,458 --> 00:04:32,375 You know, your hair turns gray. 114 00:04:32,458 --> 00:04:34,333 Your body stops metabolizing fat. 115 00:04:34,416 --> 00:04:37,583 Your skin and your nails start to crack like old clay. 116 00:04:37,666 --> 00:04:39,000 It's pretty much Mother Nature telling you 117 00:04:39,083 --> 00:04:40,875 to move to the back of the cave. 118 00:04:40,958 --> 00:04:43,708 But the Deborah Vance progesterone supplement 119 00:04:43,791 --> 00:04:45,416 replaces some of that progesterone 120 00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:47,666 the body has stopped producing. 121 00:04:47,750 --> 00:04:50,541 You can just stay hot until you... 122 00:04:50,625 --> 00:04:51,833 go off it, 123 00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:53,750 which most people do eventually because 124 00:04:53,833 --> 00:04:55,625 sustained use does sort of raise the risk 125 00:04:55,708 --> 00:04:58,666 of ovarian and breast cancer. 126 00:04:58,750 --> 00:05:00,166 Anyway... 127 00:05:00,250 --> 00:05:01,791 got jokes for that? 128 00:05:02,958 --> 00:05:05,541 - Um... 129 00:05:05,625 --> 00:05:08,458 I'm just learning about all this stuff, so I'm-- 130 00:05:08,541 --> 00:05:09,750 I'm gonna need a minute 131 00:05:09,833 --> 00:05:12,000 before I come up with something funny. 132 00:05:12,083 --> 00:05:14,250 - Okay, honey. You take your minute. 133 00:05:17,875 --> 00:05:20,666 Well, this ruined my first PJ. 134 00:05:22,166 --> 00:05:23,583 Private jet. 135 00:05:24,875 --> 00:05:26,708 - You with those killer heels, I can imagine you need 136 00:05:26,791 --> 00:05:28,000 one of these in every room. 137 00:05:28,083 --> 00:05:29,333 - Oh, I do have one in every room. 138 00:05:29,416 --> 00:05:30,750 I absolutely love them. 139 00:05:30,833 --> 00:05:32,916 And I got to tell you, I get so many emails 140 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,250 and direct messages about how people love this product. 141 00:05:35,333 --> 00:05:36,750 - Oh, Katie, it is really resonating. 142 00:05:36,833 --> 00:05:39,166 And, ladies, if you want to break WikiFeet, 143 00:05:39,250 --> 00:05:40,708 got to order one of my foot spas. 144 00:05:40,791 --> 00:05:43,500 - Oh, absolutely. - I pitched that. 145 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:46,541 - How 'bout we pivot now and talk about 146 00:05:46,625 --> 00:05:48,083 the microfiber dusting kit? 147 00:05:48,166 --> 00:05:49,166 - Let's. 148 00:05:54,750 --> 00:05:56,250 - At some point, you have to pick a genital. 149 00:05:56,333 --> 00:05:57,833 - Okay, maybe we could just have a code word 150 00:05:57,916 --> 00:06:00,583 I can use for when you say something monosexist. 151 00:06:00,666 --> 00:06:02,916 - Monosexist? - There you go. 152 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:05,166 That's a great code word for it, thank you. 153 00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:07,541 - Mom, I've been calling you. 154 00:06:07,625 --> 00:06:09,583 What'd they say at QVC about bringing me in? 155 00:06:09,666 --> 00:06:10,916 - DJ, I'm working, 156 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:12,250 and you're being rude to Ava. 157 00:06:12,333 --> 00:06:14,333 - Who? 158 00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,791 Oh, her? 159 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,458 Okay, did they like the look book, though? 160 00:06:17,541 --> 00:06:18,583 Could they open the zip? 161 00:06:18,666 --> 00:06:19,916 - You know, there really wasn't 162 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,333 a good moment to bring it up. 163 00:06:21,416 --> 00:06:23,333 - Wait a sec, you didn't even mention it? 164 00:06:23,416 --> 00:06:24,833 - DJ, I told you, I'm working. 165 00:06:24,916 --> 00:06:26,791 - Uh-huh. Yeah, you're always working. 166 00:06:26,875 --> 00:06:28,375 You're also lying to me. 167 00:06:28,458 --> 00:06:30,666 'Cause you know they'd listen to anything you said. 168 00:06:30,750 --> 00:06:32,791 - You know, um, you're right. 169 00:06:32,875 --> 00:06:35,083 I was trying to protect you, but since you're pushing me, 170 00:06:35,166 --> 00:06:37,916 I didn't mention D'Jewelry because it's not good enough. 171 00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:42,208 - It looks like junk from a mall kiosk. 172 00:06:43,416 --> 00:06:44,958 - Okay. 173 00:06:45,041 --> 00:06:47,208 You think it's junk? 174 00:06:47,291 --> 00:06:48,458 You're insane. 175 00:06:48,541 --> 00:06:51,041 - Just make it better. 176 00:06:51,125 --> 00:06:53,500 And don't give up on it just because I'm pushing you, 177 00:06:53,583 --> 00:06:55,166 like you did with your essential oils. 178 00:06:55,250 --> 00:06:58,416 - Losing a protracted legal battle isn't giving up. 179 00:06:58,500 --> 00:06:59,875 And I never once said 180 00:06:59,958 --> 00:07:02,500 that my oils would cure all types of autism. 181 00:07:03,250 --> 00:07:04,500 Well, does this mean you're not gonna come 182 00:07:04,583 --> 00:07:06,250 to my trade show this afternoon? 183 00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:08,458 - I told you, I'm going to Marty's daughter's bat mitzvah, 184 00:07:08,541 --> 00:07:10,000 and then I have a show. 185 00:07:10,083 --> 00:07:11,291 - Right, yeah. 186 00:07:11,375 --> 00:07:12,750 I guess it's good that you can be there 187 00:07:12,833 --> 00:07:15,000 for someone's kid, right? 188 00:07:15,083 --> 00:07:17,583 God forbid you do one fucking thing for me. 189 00:07:18,791 --> 00:07:20,500 - You have no idea how much I do for you. 190 00:07:20,583 --> 00:07:22,333 - Um, okay, I think I'll just go in the other-- 191 00:07:22,416 --> 00:07:23,833 - No, no, no, no. It's fine. 192 00:07:23,916 --> 00:07:26,833 I'm just--I'm calling it early today, anyway. 193 00:07:26,916 --> 00:07:28,833 take the afternoon off 194 00:07:28,916 --> 00:07:30,958 and get your tubes tied. 195 00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:39,958 - Hey, um, 196 00:07:40,041 --> 00:07:42,041 do you want me to come to your show with you? 197 00:07:42,125 --> 00:07:43,875 If you need someone there. 198 00:07:43,958 --> 00:07:45,250 - You don't have to do that 199 00:07:45,333 --> 00:07:47,041 just 'cause you feel sorry for me. 200 00:07:47,125 --> 00:07:49,958 - Well, actually, I just think it would really piss her off 201 00:07:50,041 --> 00:07:52,916 if I went with you, so... 202 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:55,791 - Okay, you fucking rule. Let's do it. 203 00:07:55,875 --> 00:07:57,875 I call shotgun. 204 00:07:57,958 --> 00:07:59,666 - I guess I'll drive. 205 00:07:59,750 --> 00:08:01,416 ♪ You breathe ♪ 206 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,041 ♪ I breathe ♪ 207 00:08:03,125 --> 00:08:04,875 ♪ We're breathing each other ♪ 208 00:08:06,708 --> 00:08:08,666 ♪ That you got from your mother ♪ 209 00:08:08,750 --> 00:08:11,916 One practice swing and then... 210 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:14,000 - Shalom! 211 00:08:14,083 --> 00:08:16,791 You look fabulous. 212 00:08:16,875 --> 00:08:18,708 - Thank you. 213 00:08:18,791 --> 00:08:20,541 - Hey, Marcus. - Marty. 214 00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:23,583 I'm gonna get a drink. - Okay. 215 00:08:23,666 --> 00:08:25,666 - So you're not still mad at me. 216 00:08:25,750 --> 00:08:27,083 - Oh, I just really love Ali, 217 00:08:27,166 --> 00:08:28,958 and that's why I got her this. 218 00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:32,250 It's the limited-edition Birkin that she wanted. 219 00:08:32,333 --> 00:08:34,125 - Well, that's very generous of you, Deborah. 220 00:08:34,208 --> 00:08:35,416 - Oh, it's not just the purse. 221 00:08:35,500 --> 00:08:37,458 It's what comes with it. 222 00:08:37,541 --> 00:08:40,583 This is a letter from the headmaster at St. Xavier's. 223 00:08:40,666 --> 00:08:42,500 So you let me keep my dates, 224 00:08:42,583 --> 00:08:46,416 Ali gets to go to school with all her little friends. 225 00:08:46,500 --> 00:08:48,375 - I'm not changing my mind. 226 00:08:48,458 --> 00:08:51,000 But you must have gone through some trouble because 227 00:08:51,083 --> 00:08:52,958 if I remember correctly, DJ drove her Jeep 228 00:08:53,041 --> 00:08:55,625 through the gym at St. Xavier's her junior year. 229 00:08:55,708 --> 00:08:58,166 - It was a Range Rover through the rare book room, 230 00:08:58,250 --> 00:09:00,166 and I fully funded the rebuild. 231 00:09:00,250 --> 00:09:02,083 - Still friends, right? 232 00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:03,666 - Oh, the best of. 233 00:09:07,125 --> 00:09:09,958 - Oh, my God. 234 00:09:10,041 --> 00:09:12,208 Marcus! 235 00:09:12,291 --> 00:09:13,916 Do not get me in trouble today. 236 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:16,208 I always drink too much when you're around. 237 00:09:16,291 --> 00:09:17,583 Double vodka soda. 238 00:09:17,666 --> 00:09:19,708 - This is a beautiful event, Rina. 239 00:09:19,791 --> 00:09:21,500 - It's been like pulling teeth. 240 00:09:21,583 --> 00:09:24,000 Marty nickel-and-dimed it the entire time. 241 00:09:24,083 --> 00:09:25,458 I had to fight him 242 00:09:25,541 --> 00:09:27,500 to have lamb chops as a passed hors d'oeuvre. 243 00:09:27,583 --> 00:09:29,875 Can you believe? This is a bat mitzvah. 244 00:09:29,958 --> 00:09:31,125 - Ugh, God. 245 00:09:31,208 --> 00:09:33,583 Now, where's the new girlfriend? 246 00:09:33,666 --> 00:09:34,750 - Ivy. 247 00:09:34,833 --> 00:09:37,166 Marty says she's an old soul. 248 00:09:37,250 --> 00:09:38,625 - Lucky Marty, keeps finding old souls 249 00:09:38,708 --> 00:09:41,666 in 26-year-old bodies. 250 00:09:45,833 --> 00:09:47,333 - Look, I don't know what to tell you, man. 251 00:09:47,416 --> 00:09:48,916 There's sewage coming out of the shower hole, 252 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:50,625 and this tenant is, like, a giant pain in my ass, 253 00:09:50,708 --> 00:09:52,916 so it needs to be done, like, fricking yesterday. 254 00:09:54,333 --> 00:09:56,875 Yeah, I've got Venmo. 255 00:09:56,958 --> 00:10:00,666 Ugh, managing a building is a nightmare. 256 00:10:00,750 --> 00:10:03,125 - Wait, you're-- you're a building manager? 257 00:10:03,208 --> 00:10:04,666 - Yeah, I manage the building I live in 258 00:10:04,750 --> 00:10:06,500 in exchange for rent. 259 00:10:06,583 --> 00:10:09,000 I get it, you thought I was some, like, hot rich kid 260 00:10:09,083 --> 00:10:10,708 living off her parents' money? 261 00:10:10,791 --> 00:10:13,583 - Um, kind of. 262 00:10:13,666 --> 00:10:14,708 - I don't blame you; I would've thought 263 00:10:14,791 --> 00:10:15,833 the same thing, but nope. 264 00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:18,583 I am a professional. 265 00:10:24,416 --> 00:10:27,208 I tumble my rocks myself. - Oh, I see. 266 00:10:27,291 --> 00:10:28,833 - It's kind of what sets me apart 267 00:10:28,916 --> 00:10:31,708 'cause, you know, nobody else here self-tumbles. 268 00:10:31,791 --> 00:10:33,166 - Cool. - Yeah. 269 00:10:33,250 --> 00:10:35,500 So what's your earring story? 270 00:10:35,583 --> 00:10:37,125 - My what? - Well, I'm seeing 271 00:10:37,208 --> 00:10:38,541 two studs, a huggie hoop, 272 00:10:38,625 --> 00:10:40,208 and then a couple vacant holes that just aren't 273 00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:41,541 living up to their potential. 274 00:10:41,625 --> 00:10:42,875 What did you have in mind with that? 275 00:10:42,958 --> 00:10:45,041 - Um, God, not much. 276 00:10:45,125 --> 00:10:46,791 I didn't really think about it. - No, you didn't 277 00:10:46,875 --> 00:10:49,083 think it through. - Yeah, no. 278 00:10:49,166 --> 00:10:51,125 - Um... 279 00:10:55,125 --> 00:10:56,541 Okay, all right. 280 00:10:56,625 --> 00:10:58,500 Why don't you scoot that huggie up, 281 00:10:58,583 --> 00:11:00,416 pop these in the empties? 282 00:11:01,666 --> 00:11:03,291 Let's see what's what. 283 00:11:03,375 --> 00:11:05,750 Oh, shit! 284 00:11:05,833 --> 00:11:08,125 I mean, those look hot on you. 285 00:11:08,208 --> 00:11:09,500 - Oh, yeah. 286 00:11:09,583 --> 00:11:10,916 - You go ahead and wear those today. 287 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:12,125 You can be my model. 288 00:11:12,208 --> 00:11:13,375 Check it out. 289 00:11:13,458 --> 00:11:15,000 - Oh, wow. - What do you think? 290 00:11:15,083 --> 00:11:17,958 - They are... 291 00:11:18,041 --> 00:11:19,125 substantial. 292 00:11:19,208 --> 00:11:20,333 - Yeah, right? 293 00:11:20,416 --> 00:11:22,583 - I mean, they look... 294 00:11:22,666 --> 00:11:24,791 like a key to another dimension. 295 00:11:24,875 --> 00:11:25,916 - Thank you. 296 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:27,083 So much cooler than something 297 00:11:27,166 --> 00:11:29,416 from a fuckin' mall kiosk. 298 00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:31,083 Right? 299 00:11:31,166 --> 00:11:32,416 - Yeah, I'm sorry about that. 300 00:11:32,500 --> 00:11:35,000 She was really harsh back there. 301 00:11:35,083 --> 00:11:36,250 - Whatever. 302 00:11:36,333 --> 00:11:38,000 I spent thousands of hours in therapy 303 00:11:38,083 --> 00:11:40,333 trying to process how to deal with Deborah. 304 00:11:40,416 --> 00:11:42,416 - Well it's good you're doing the work. 305 00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:44,875 Your mom once told me therapy is for bulimics 306 00:11:44,958 --> 00:11:45,916 and pedophiles. - Pedophiles? 307 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:47,625 Yeah, she loves that one. 308 00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:50,791 - God, it's so nice to be able to vent about her to someone. 309 00:11:50,875 --> 00:11:52,541 - Oh, God, I am so down. 310 00:11:52,625 --> 00:11:55,125 And look, I get it. I'm not perfect, right? 311 00:11:55,208 --> 00:11:56,833 I'm always gonna be a work in progress. 312 00:11:56,916 --> 00:11:58,291 - Yeah. - But I'm finally able 313 00:11:58,375 --> 00:12:01,000 to practice radical acceptance, right? 314 00:12:01,083 --> 00:12:02,708 So I can just radically accept 315 00:12:02,791 --> 00:12:04,791 that my mom is a cunt. 316 00:12:07,458 --> 00:12:08,958 - I wasn't joking, but... 317 00:12:09,041 --> 00:12:11,000 I can see why you'd laugh. - Oh, sorry. 318 00:12:11,083 --> 00:12:13,083 - Yeah. My chokers are unisex. 319 00:12:15,333 --> 00:12:16,666 - I can't let you drink that. 320 00:12:16,750 --> 00:12:18,916 - Yeah, leave the cheap wine for the kids. 321 00:12:20,416 --> 00:12:21,708 Now... 322 00:12:21,791 --> 00:12:23,875 ah. 323 00:12:23,958 --> 00:12:25,666 Isn't this the one you liked last time? 324 00:12:25,750 --> 00:12:29,166 That is the one I loved last time. 325 00:12:29,250 --> 00:12:30,500 Open it. 326 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,791 - Yes, ma'am. 327 00:12:32,875 --> 00:12:35,166 - Your collection has really grown 328 00:12:35,250 --> 00:12:37,333 since the last time I was down here. 329 00:12:37,416 --> 00:12:38,666 - Well, they say if you collect, 330 00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:40,750 it's not a problem; it's a hobby. 331 00:12:40,833 --> 00:12:42,750 - Well, the first step is admitting you have a hobby. 332 00:12:44,916 --> 00:12:46,666 Ah, I love that sound. 333 00:12:47,916 --> 00:12:50,291 - Let's drink to your daughter 334 00:12:50,375 --> 00:12:51,500 becoming a woman. 335 00:12:51,583 --> 00:12:53,916 - She's a good kid. 336 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,291 Mostly. - Yeah, well, I know 337 00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:57,000 where she gets her naughtiness from. 338 00:12:57,083 --> 00:12:59,333 - Her mother. - Ha, nice try. 339 00:13:00,916 --> 00:13:03,666 So, Deborah Vance, 340 00:13:03,750 --> 00:13:05,583 what's new with you? 341 00:13:05,666 --> 00:13:07,750 - Well, lately I've been trying to wrestle 342 00:13:07,833 --> 00:13:10,666 my stage time back from a handsome tyrant. 343 00:13:10,750 --> 00:13:12,208 - Oh, come on. 344 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:14,083 I talk business all day. 345 00:13:14,166 --> 00:13:15,750 You're the one person I'd love to talk 346 00:13:15,833 --> 00:13:17,541 about anything else with. 347 00:13:18,958 --> 00:13:20,125 - Okay. 348 00:13:20,208 --> 00:13:21,875 Okay. - Okay. 349 00:13:21,958 --> 00:13:25,250 Cheers. 350 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:30,458 Mmm. 351 00:13:31,833 --> 00:13:33,750 I'm getting plum 352 00:13:33,833 --> 00:13:35,708 and licorice? 353 00:13:35,791 --> 00:13:37,875 - Honestly, I'm getting mint. 354 00:13:37,958 --> 00:13:39,250 I forgot to spit out my gum. 355 00:13:39,333 --> 00:13:43,375 Jesus. 356 00:13:43,458 --> 00:13:45,666 Maybe it'll be better now. 357 00:13:45,750 --> 00:13:48,458 - Oh, I haven't even told my mom I live here yet. 358 00:13:48,541 --> 00:13:51,541 She's gonna freak when she finds out I lost my deal. 359 00:13:51,625 --> 00:13:54,041 Also, my mom's not a conspiracy theorist, 360 00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:56,666 but I think that's just 'cause her Internet's too slow. 361 00:13:56,750 --> 00:13:58,708 - God, moms are the worst. 362 00:13:58,791 --> 00:14:01,583 I'm so sorry you have to deal with yours and mine now. 363 00:14:01,666 --> 00:14:03,416 I honestly can't believe that she's making you 364 00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:05,916 watch all of the stupid shit she's ever done. 365 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,041 - It's a lot, yeah. 366 00:14:07,125 --> 00:14:08,375 - So stupid. - It's a lot. 367 00:14:08,458 --> 00:14:09,750 Though I got to say, 368 00:14:09,833 --> 00:14:11,833 it is crazy she was almost the first woman 369 00:14:11,916 --> 00:14:13,125 to host a late-night show. 370 00:14:13,208 --> 00:14:14,875 - Yeah, and maybe if she hadn't acted like 371 00:14:14,958 --> 00:14:17,791 a frickin' pyro, they would've picked it up. 372 00:14:17,875 --> 00:14:20,583 - Sounds like it was a dramatic time. 373 00:14:20,666 --> 00:14:22,750 - It's always a dramatic time with her. 374 00:14:22,833 --> 00:14:24,750 - Yeah. - Do you know my aunt/stepmom's 375 00:14:24,833 --> 00:14:27,125 been trying to talk to her for, like, 40 years? 376 00:14:27,208 --> 00:14:28,583 The woman doesn't let anything go. 377 00:14:28,666 --> 00:14:29,791 - Jesus. 378 00:14:29,875 --> 00:14:31,416 - Laurie, my-- that's my therapist. 379 00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:33,041 She's always telling me my trauma started 380 00:14:33,125 --> 00:14:35,041 when she dragged me out on the road with her. 381 00:14:35,125 --> 00:14:36,250 I mean, I was a kid. 382 00:14:36,333 --> 00:14:38,291 I wanted to go to school, you know, 383 00:14:38,375 --> 00:14:40,000 and just be normal. - Yeah. 384 00:14:40,083 --> 00:14:42,500 - Instead, I'm 13 years old doing my first line of coke 385 00:14:42,583 --> 00:14:44,208 in the Chuckle Hut in Kalamazoo. 386 00:14:44,291 --> 00:14:46,000 - Jesus Christ. - I know. 387 00:14:47,375 --> 00:14:49,958 Was it at least good coke? 388 00:14:50,041 --> 00:14:53,583 For a 13-year-old, sure, yeah. 389 00:14:53,666 --> 00:14:54,958 - Listen, I'm not dumb. 390 00:14:55,041 --> 00:14:56,875 I know that I've got to own my actions, 391 00:14:56,958 --> 00:14:58,208 but she's the reason 392 00:14:58,291 --> 00:15:00,625 I've been in recovery for 20 years. 393 00:15:00,708 --> 00:15:01,875 20 years! 394 00:15:01,958 --> 00:15:03,125 And do you think she's ever once 395 00:15:03,208 --> 00:15:04,375 come to a meeting with me? 396 00:15:05,916 --> 00:15:07,583 No, not one. 397 00:15:10,583 --> 00:15:11,625 Whatever. 398 00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:16,291 Can you, like, face forward with those or something? 399 00:15:16,375 --> 00:15:17,458 - Yeah. - I feel like you're not 400 00:15:17,541 --> 00:15:19,333 getting any earring attention. 401 00:15:19,416 --> 00:15:21,958 - Where is it now? - Another one? 402 00:15:22,041 --> 00:15:25,833 Don't you have to go step on a glass or whatever? 403 00:15:25,916 --> 00:15:28,625 More fun down here. 404 00:15:28,708 --> 00:15:30,875 Should we be bad and open the Margaux? 405 00:15:30,958 --> 00:15:32,583 - Oh, you're naughty. 406 00:15:32,666 --> 00:15:34,250 Told you where she got it from. 407 00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:36,916 Yeah, that kid. 408 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,208 She told me if I didn't get her a new iPhone, 409 00:15:39,291 --> 00:15:41,166 she was gonna "join Antifa." 410 00:15:41,250 --> 00:15:44,708 No! 411 00:15:44,791 --> 00:15:46,666 Oh, no, but that's good. That's good. 412 00:15:46,750 --> 00:15:48,250 You want her to be bold, you know, 413 00:15:48,333 --> 00:15:50,875 have personality. 414 00:15:50,958 --> 00:15:54,666 Of course, what do I know about parenting? 415 00:15:54,750 --> 00:15:56,875 - You did the best you could. 416 00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,000 - Thanks. 417 00:16:01,583 --> 00:16:02,916 Let me give you a hand. 418 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:06,166 - Here, I got it. All the way down and... 419 00:16:09,291 --> 00:16:10,166 - Marty? 420 00:16:10,250 --> 00:16:11,708 - Yeah, hey! 421 00:16:11,791 --> 00:16:14,291 - Baby, I've been looking all over for you. 422 00:16:14,375 --> 00:16:15,583 - Yeah, we'll be right up. 423 00:16:15,666 --> 00:16:17,000 Just giving a little tour. - Okay. 424 00:16:17,083 --> 00:16:18,375 - Showing me how to use this thing. 425 00:16:18,458 --> 00:16:20,041 - All right. - Okay, be right up. 426 00:16:20,125 --> 00:16:22,000 - Well, I guess... 427 00:16:22,083 --> 00:16:23,958 we should go. 428 00:16:24,041 --> 00:16:25,375 - Nah. 429 00:16:25,458 --> 00:16:26,583 It's open now. 430 00:16:28,125 --> 00:16:30,708 We might as well just... 431 00:16:30,791 --> 00:16:32,875 drink it. 432 00:16:32,958 --> 00:16:34,708 One glass. - One glass. 433 00:16:37,916 --> 00:16:39,416 - We were right there. 434 00:16:41,375 --> 00:16:42,916 - Oh, perfect, let's get a quick shot 435 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,166 of the beautiful couple. - Oh, no. 436 00:16:45,250 --> 00:16:46,916 No, no, this is my girl. 437 00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,458 Ivy? - Yes? 438 00:16:51,416 --> 00:16:52,833 - Okay. 439 00:16:54,375 --> 00:16:56,166 Beautiful. 440 00:16:56,250 --> 00:16:58,916 Great, good. - One more serious. 441 00:17:00,375 --> 00:17:02,416 - Nah, see, belly chains are always in style 442 00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:04,583 'cause they have ethnic roots. 443 00:17:04,666 --> 00:17:06,875 - Huh. 444 00:17:06,958 --> 00:17:08,375 - Oh, shit. 445 00:17:08,458 --> 00:17:10,166 Oh, I think I know that woman. 446 00:17:10,250 --> 00:17:12,416 That's the buyer for Neiman Marcus. 447 00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:14,416 Oh, God, I'm getting nervous. 448 00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:16,250 My pits are going and my mouth is getting dry. 449 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:17,791 How's my breath? 450 00:17:17,875 --> 00:17:19,375 - It's, um-- 451 00:17:19,458 --> 00:17:21,500 - What am I talking about? She's never gonna stop here. 452 00:17:21,583 --> 00:17:24,375 My stuff's not good enough. 453 00:17:24,458 --> 00:17:26,791 Shit. 454 00:17:28,750 --> 00:17:30,291 Where are you-- what are you doing? 455 00:17:30,375 --> 00:17:32,375 What are you doing? 456 00:17:32,458 --> 00:17:33,958 - Oh, hey! 457 00:17:34,041 --> 00:17:35,833 - Hey? - Didn't we meet 458 00:17:35,916 --> 00:17:38,375 at Irene Neuwirth's birthday party? 459 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,458 - I don't think so. 460 00:17:39,541 --> 00:17:41,458 - Blanche from Just One Eye? 461 00:17:41,541 --> 00:17:42,958 - You're from Just One Eye? 462 00:17:43,041 --> 00:17:44,416 I love that store. 463 00:17:44,500 --> 00:17:46,416 I didn't know they had a buyer. - Oh, yeah. 464 00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:49,541 I'm actually buying a ton of stuff right now. 465 00:17:49,625 --> 00:17:51,125 - I self-tumble. 466 00:17:52,833 --> 00:17:53,791 - Cool. 467 00:17:53,875 --> 00:17:55,500 Can I take your look book? 468 00:17:56,458 --> 00:17:58,125 - Yes. 469 00:17:59,375 --> 00:18:01,291 - Hey, if you're ever in LA, stop by the store. 470 00:18:01,375 --> 00:18:02,750 Our offices are upstairs. 471 00:18:02,833 --> 00:18:03,833 - For sure. 472 00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,875 Good to see you. - You too. 473 00:18:05,958 --> 00:18:07,083 - Okay. 474 00:18:11,041 --> 00:18:13,250 What was that? - I don't know! 475 00:18:13,333 --> 00:18:14,875 I follow Busy Philipps on Instagram. 476 00:18:14,958 --> 00:18:17,416 She's constantly posting about jewelry people. 477 00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:19,791 Oh, thank God watching thousands and thousands 478 00:18:19,875 --> 00:18:21,875 and thousands and thousands of those stories 479 00:18:21,958 --> 00:18:23,166 finally paid off. 480 00:18:23,250 --> 00:18:24,666 - Okay, bitch, you keep those earrings 481 00:18:24,750 --> 00:18:26,333 because you earned them. 482 00:18:26,416 --> 00:18:28,333 Let's blow this shit and go celebrate. 483 00:18:28,416 --> 00:18:29,666 I've got the perfect bar for us. 484 00:18:29,750 --> 00:18:31,541 - Oh, my God, I would love that. 485 00:18:31,625 --> 00:18:33,708 Wait, um, aren't you-- 486 00:18:33,791 --> 00:18:35,083 aren't you in recovery? 487 00:18:35,166 --> 00:18:36,833 - Just for powder and pills, babe. 488 00:18:36,916 --> 00:18:39,083 Liquid's on the menu. 489 00:18:39,166 --> 00:18:41,458 - Go with--you go with citrus? 490 00:18:41,541 --> 00:18:43,333 Boom, orchard. 491 00:18:43,416 --> 00:18:46,291 - Marty. - Marcus. 492 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,708 Quieres Cohiba? 493 00:18:47,791 --> 00:18:48,833 - Oh, I would, but I just 494 00:18:48,916 --> 00:18:50,375 bleached my teeth this morning. 495 00:18:51,458 --> 00:18:52,666 - So look, 496 00:18:52,750 --> 00:18:54,708 the smaller theater at the casino, 497 00:18:54,791 --> 00:18:55,833 why don't you give it to Deborah 498 00:18:55,916 --> 00:18:57,083 for Fridays and Saturdays? 499 00:18:57,166 --> 00:18:58,750 - You two are relentless. 500 00:18:58,833 --> 00:19:00,250 - I've already cleared it with the production guys. 501 00:19:00,333 --> 00:19:02,541 They can move the set back easily on Sunday. 502 00:19:02,625 --> 00:19:04,541 You could double the income those nights. 503 00:19:04,625 --> 00:19:06,125 She doesn't feel slighted. 504 00:19:06,208 --> 00:19:08,458 Everybody wins. 505 00:19:08,541 --> 00:19:09,958 - Interesting. 506 00:19:10,041 --> 00:19:12,083 Let's connect next week. 507 00:19:12,166 --> 00:19:13,375 - All right. 508 00:19:15,958 --> 00:19:17,250 - Showbiz people. 509 00:19:19,041 --> 00:19:20,625 It's always something. 510 00:19:20,708 --> 00:19:22,375 - And... 511 00:19:22,458 --> 00:19:23,375 hyah! 512 00:19:23,458 --> 00:19:24,916 - Whoo! - Oh, yeah! 513 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,208 Right? 514 00:19:26,291 --> 00:19:27,750 - It feels good, doesn't it? 515 00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:30,250 I'm telling you, for people with mommy issues, 516 00:19:30,333 --> 00:19:32,000 this place is essential. 517 00:19:32,083 --> 00:19:34,583 Oh, work call. Be right back. 518 00:19:34,666 --> 00:19:37,250 - Grab some throwing stars on your way back. 519 00:19:37,333 --> 00:19:38,583 - Okay. - I'll watch your drink. 520 00:19:38,666 --> 00:19:41,250 - Oh, it's whatever. 521 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:46,666 - How old are you? 522 00:19:50,666 --> 00:19:53,125 - I'm sure you get this all the time, 523 00:19:53,208 --> 00:19:55,375 but it's so awesome to meet you. 524 00:19:55,458 --> 00:19:56,541 - Oh. - I'm a fan. 525 00:19:56,625 --> 00:19:57,750 I feel like I've known you 526 00:19:57,833 --> 00:19:59,791 my whole life. - Oh, thank you. 527 00:20:02,500 --> 00:20:04,125 - Do you like it? 528 00:20:04,208 --> 00:20:06,125 - Yes, actually, I do. 529 00:20:06,208 --> 00:20:07,791 There are so many kids running around today, 530 00:20:07,875 --> 00:20:09,416 I hope Marty's got good insurance. 531 00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:11,041 - Well, the corporation does. 532 00:20:11,125 --> 00:20:12,291 Everything's through the corp. 533 00:20:15,708 --> 00:20:17,666 - It is a beautiful piece. 534 00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:19,958 But you know what? I saw... 535 00:20:20,041 --> 00:20:22,166 a sculpture in the hall. 536 00:20:22,250 --> 00:20:23,500 Was that you too? 537 00:20:23,583 --> 00:20:25,041 Guilty! 538 00:20:25,125 --> 00:20:27,125 I actually redid the whole place myself. 539 00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:30,958 - I knew it. - I fuckin' love art. 540 00:20:31,041 --> 00:20:34,708 - I fucking love art too. It looks so much better. 541 00:20:34,791 --> 00:20:36,791 I'm thinking of doing some redecorating myself. 542 00:20:36,875 --> 00:20:38,833 Would you mind terribly if I just 543 00:20:38,916 --> 00:20:41,208 took a couple pictures for inspiration? 544 00:20:41,291 --> 00:20:43,083 - I am so flattered. Yeah. 545 00:20:43,166 --> 00:20:44,500 - Thank you. 546 00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:49,083 Do you think I could also get a little tour? 547 00:20:49,833 --> 00:20:51,291 - I don't know. 548 00:20:51,375 --> 00:20:53,458 Marty doesn't want guests in certain areas of the house. 549 00:20:53,541 --> 00:20:55,041 - Oh, gosh, I would have loved 550 00:20:55,125 --> 00:20:57,208 to have seen more of your work, 551 00:20:57,291 --> 00:21:00,750 but I guess Marty's the boss. 552 00:21:01,833 --> 00:21:04,375 - I can probably show you around just a little bit. 553 00:21:04,458 --> 00:21:06,083 - Oh, great. - But you can't tell Marty. 554 00:21:06,166 --> 00:21:07,166 - Oh. 555 00:21:11,333 --> 00:21:13,166 - That really is 556 00:21:13,250 --> 00:21:14,500 a striking piece. 557 00:21:14,583 --> 00:21:15,958 It's really-- 558 00:21:16,041 --> 00:21:18,333 Would you mind getting one with me in it for scale? 559 00:21:18,416 --> 00:21:21,375 - Of course; get in there. - Thanks. 560 00:21:28,916 --> 00:21:31,250 - You dog. - Just like. 561 00:21:31,333 --> 00:21:33,375 Great. 562 00:21:36,791 --> 00:21:37,916 Fun. 563 00:21:39,291 --> 00:21:41,375 - Ready to go? - Yup. 564 00:21:41,458 --> 00:21:43,000 Arrange a lunch with Tim Gurley. 565 00:21:43,083 --> 00:21:46,166 I have some assets that I want him to appraise. 566 00:21:46,250 --> 00:21:48,166 Marty, sweetie, 567 00:21:48,250 --> 00:21:50,375 we're gonna have to get together for drinks soon. 568 00:21:50,458 --> 00:21:52,791 - Great, I'll have Phyllis set. 569 00:21:52,875 --> 00:21:54,000 - Great. 570 00:21:55,750 --> 00:21:57,041 I don't like that. 571 00:22:01,416 --> 00:22:02,875 - The one time I was in LA, 572 00:22:02,958 --> 00:22:05,541 I saw Tobey Maguire coming out of a Coffee Bean. 573 00:22:05,625 --> 00:22:06,958 - Mm. - He was wearing one 574 00:22:07,041 --> 00:22:08,375 of those boots like when, 575 00:22:08,458 --> 00:22:10,708 you know, you break your ankle. 576 00:22:10,791 --> 00:22:12,375 Do you think that he was 577 00:22:12,458 --> 00:22:14,875 wearing that for a role, or... 578 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,125 do you think he was injured? 579 00:22:16,208 --> 00:22:17,583 Like, does he ski? 580 00:22:18,375 --> 00:22:21,666 - Oh, I--I don't know if Tobey Maguire skis. 581 00:22:24,791 --> 00:22:27,333 Hey, DJ's been gone a while, huh? 582 00:22:27,416 --> 00:22:29,583 I guess managing an apartment building 583 00:22:29,666 --> 00:22:30,875 is actually a lot of work. 584 00:22:33,333 --> 00:22:34,958 What? 585 00:22:35,041 --> 00:22:36,708 What am I missing? 586 00:22:37,458 --> 00:22:40,416 - That's not what she means by "work." 587 00:22:40,500 --> 00:22:41,916 She sells photos, honey. 588 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,541 She hires a photographer to take photos of Deborah, 589 00:22:44,625 --> 00:22:46,583 and then she sells them to, like, TMZ or wherever. 590 00:22:46,666 --> 00:22:48,291 - Yeah, she makes hella cash. - Hella. 591 00:22:48,375 --> 00:22:50,958 - And she makes, like, a lot more 592 00:22:51,041 --> 00:22:52,833 if Deborah looks like shit. 593 00:22:52,916 --> 00:22:54,250 - That's so fucked. 594 00:22:54,333 --> 00:22:55,791 - Hey, you're in the house all the time. 595 00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:57,166 You should do it too; I bet you could sell, 596 00:22:57,250 --> 00:22:58,458 like, her medical records 597 00:22:58,541 --> 00:22:59,875 or her diary or whatever. 598 00:22:59,958 --> 00:23:01,750 - Her underwear. - Okay, ladies. 599 00:23:01,833 --> 00:23:04,375 I got next round, so finish up. 600 00:23:04,458 --> 00:23:06,708 - Whoo! - Time me. 601 00:23:06,791 --> 00:23:09,541 - Nice, nice, nice. - Get it, get it. 602 00:23:09,625 --> 00:23:11,208 - Yes, yes, almost there, almost there. 603 00:23:11,291 --> 00:23:13,291 - Whoo! - Oh! 604 00:23:13,375 --> 00:23:14,791 - What'd you get? 605 00:23:14,875 --> 00:23:16,291 - Uh, I didn't time. 606 00:23:16,375 --> 00:23:17,666 - Oh, fuck. 607 00:23:17,750 --> 00:23:19,041 Give me yours. - Okay. 608 00:23:19,125 --> 00:23:20,666 - Ready, go. 609 00:23:20,750 --> 00:23:21,958 Go! 610 00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:36,208 - Hey, can I talk to you? 611 00:23:36,291 --> 00:23:38,250 - Yeah. 612 00:23:40,750 --> 00:23:42,791 - You know what? It's right before your show. 613 00:23:42,875 --> 00:23:45,458 Maybe later is a better time. I don't want to mess you up. 614 00:23:45,541 --> 00:23:47,666 - You can't mess me up. 615 00:23:47,750 --> 00:23:49,708 What is it? 616 00:23:49,791 --> 00:23:51,291 - Okay, I'm gonna-- I'm gonna tell you this, 617 00:23:51,375 --> 00:23:53,708 but please don't ask me how I know. 618 00:23:53,791 --> 00:23:56,541 But, um, 619 00:23:56,625 --> 00:23:59,791 someone I know is--is selling pictures of you to TMZ, 620 00:23:59,875 --> 00:24:02,916 and I don't know if you can stop it, but I just-- 621 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:04,583 I thought I should tell you. 622 00:24:06,375 --> 00:24:07,916 - All right, thank you. 623 00:24:09,250 --> 00:24:10,333 - You're just gonna let it go? 624 00:24:10,416 --> 00:24:11,875 You're not gonna... 625 00:24:11,958 --> 00:24:13,541 ask me who it is? 626 00:24:18,583 --> 00:24:21,083 Oh, you let her. 627 00:24:22,625 --> 00:24:25,000 - Makes her feel self-sufficient. 628 00:24:26,916 --> 00:24:29,416 I have to get dressed. - Yeah. 629 00:25:12,125 --> 00:25:13,000 - Hello. 630 00:25:13,083 --> 00:25:14,375 - Hey, Mom. 631 00:25:14,458 --> 00:25:15,916 Sorry, is it too late? 632 00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:18,916 - No, no, I'm just being quiet because your father 633 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:20,416 finally fell asleep. 634 00:25:20,500 --> 00:25:21,791 Hopefully he sleeps through the night 635 00:25:21,875 --> 00:25:23,750 so I can get some rest. 636 00:25:23,833 --> 00:25:25,708 - I'm sorry. - Oh, no, no. 637 00:25:25,791 --> 00:25:27,083 It's okay, it's okay, honey. 638 00:25:27,166 --> 00:25:28,541 How's your new place? 639 00:25:28,625 --> 00:25:29,958 - It's good. 640 00:25:31,500 --> 00:25:33,041 Though, uh, 641 00:25:33,125 --> 00:25:35,291 I'm not actually there right now. 642 00:25:37,083 --> 00:25:39,333 I've actually been living in Las Vegas. 643 00:25:39,416 --> 00:25:40,708 - Vegas? 644 00:25:40,791 --> 00:25:41,833 Are you gambling? 645 00:25:41,916 --> 00:25:44,208 - No, I-- I lost my deal and-- 646 00:25:44,291 --> 00:25:45,500 - Wait, lost your deal? 647 00:25:45,583 --> 00:25:47,208 But you just bought that place in LA. 648 00:25:47,291 --> 00:25:49,250 - I know, that's why I got another job. 649 00:25:49,333 --> 00:25:50,750 That's what I'm trying to tell you. 650 00:25:50,833 --> 00:25:52,625 Also, isn't Dad asleep? You're yelling. 651 00:25:52,708 --> 00:25:54,000 - Oh, my God, Ava, I told you 652 00:25:54,083 --> 00:25:56,375 that business is so unstable. 653 00:25:56,458 --> 00:25:57,708 I mean, what's next? 654 00:25:57,791 --> 00:25:59,125 You're gonna have to move home here 655 00:25:59,208 --> 00:26:00,250 and live with us? 656 00:26:00,333 --> 00:26:02,208 I don't have room for you here. 657 00:26:02,291 --> 00:26:04,291 I mean, I guess we can put a cot in the kitchen. 658 00:26:04,375 --> 00:26:06,083 - No, Mom, no cot in the kitchen. 659 00:26:06,166 --> 00:26:07,916 I'm not coming home. Jesus. 660 00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:10,000 - No, it's okay, Ava. I know where the cot is. 661 00:26:10,083 --> 00:26:12,041 It's in the basement next to the Christmas decorations. 662 00:26:12,125 --> 00:26:13,416 - I'll be fine, okay? - I'm on it. 663 00:26:13,500 --> 00:26:15,750 - You'll be fine. 664 00:26:15,833 --> 00:26:17,375 I got to go. - Wait, Ava-- 665 00:26:45,416 --> 00:26:46,750 Hello. - I think they've been 666 00:26:46,833 --> 00:26:48,958 overcharging you for room service. 667 00:26:50,916 --> 00:26:52,875 - Who is this? 668 00:26:52,958 --> 00:26:54,000 - I've been going over your charges. 669 00:26:54,083 --> 00:26:55,291 They have you ordering 670 00:26:55,375 --> 00:26:57,708 three chicken Parms in one night. 671 00:26:57,791 --> 00:26:59,708 What are you, the NSA? 672 00:26:59,791 --> 00:27:01,833 You're going through my room service bills? 673 00:27:01,916 --> 00:27:03,625 - Well, of course, it's my money. 674 00:27:03,708 --> 00:27:05,958 I think they made a mistake. I don't like being overcharged. 675 00:27:06,041 --> 00:27:08,125 - Wow, three chicken Parms. 676 00:27:08,208 --> 00:27:09,250 In one night? 677 00:27:09,333 --> 00:27:11,166 That's crazy. 678 00:27:12,125 --> 00:27:13,791 But I did order them. 679 00:27:13,875 --> 00:27:15,291 - What, were you entertaining? 680 00:27:15,375 --> 00:27:16,708 - No, it was just me. 681 00:27:16,791 --> 00:27:18,125 But they're medium size, though, 682 00:27:18,208 --> 00:27:19,458 and I eat the leftovers for breakfast, 683 00:27:19,541 --> 00:27:21,416 so you're actually saving money. 684 00:27:21,500 --> 00:27:22,458 - For breakfast? 685 00:27:22,541 --> 00:27:24,916 - I may have been high. 686 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:26,333 - Yeah, you must have been. 687 00:27:26,416 --> 00:27:28,291 Oh. Oh, oh, what do I hear? 688 00:27:28,375 --> 00:27:30,541 Is that "SVU"? - "Criminal Intent." 689 00:27:30,625 --> 00:27:33,291 - What channel? - Um... 690 00:27:35,166 --> 00:27:36,416 55. 691 00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:38,440 Corrected and improved by == Flatto (subscene.com) == 692 00:27:39,916 --> 00:27:41,708 - Oh, I've seen this one. 693 00:27:41,791 --> 00:27:44,208 Yeah, this attorney turns out to be a schizophrenic. 694 00:27:44,291 --> 00:27:46,208 - Deborah! - I didn't write it. 695 00:27:46,291 --> 00:27:47,708 - Yeah, but you spoiled it. 696 00:27:47,791 --> 00:27:49,208 - Oh, it's so obvious. 697 00:27:49,291 --> 00:27:51,125 He's the biggest guest star on the episode. 698 00:27:51,208 --> 00:27:52,500 If his name comes before 699 00:27:52,583 --> 00:27:54,000 the opening credits, he did it. 700 00:27:54,083 --> 00:27:56,416 - No! Now you've spoiled every single one of them. 701 00:27:56,500 --> 00:27:58,583 - Well, it's better you know. 702 00:27:58,666 --> 00:28:00,500 - I think I could play a dead body. 703 00:28:00,583 --> 00:28:02,166 - Well, you certainly have the complexion. 704 00:28:05,125 --> 00:28:07,083 - This is actually pretty triggering for me 705 00:28:07,166 --> 00:28:08,625 'cause I've never learned how to swim. 706 00:28:08,708 --> 00:28:10,041 - What? 707 00:28:10,125 --> 00:28:11,416 You don't know how to swim? 708 00:28:11,500 --> 00:28:12,541 That's ridiculous. 709 00:28:12,625 --> 00:28:14,041 - No one taught me as a kid. 710 00:28:14,125 --> 00:28:16,250 I thought about taking swim classes for adults, 711 00:28:16,333 --> 00:28:18,833 but honestly, that's sadder than just drowning. 712 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,375 ♪ So move over, darling ♪ 713 00:28:25,916 --> 00:28:29,666 ♪ If my heart bends ♪ 714 00:28:29,750 --> 00:28:31,375 ♪ I'll know ♪ 715 00:28:36,625 --> 00:28:40,875 ♪ And if I had to stay ♪ 716 00:28:40,958 --> 00:28:44,708 ♪ You know I would ♪ 717 00:28:44,791 --> 00:28:46,708 ♪ Have stayed ♪ 718 00:28:51,541 --> 00:28:55,875 ♪ So, baby, don't hold me back ♪ 719 00:28:55,958 --> 00:28:59,666 ♪ 'Cause if I win ♪ 720 00:28:59,750 --> 00:29:01,500 ♪ I'll change ♪ 721 00:29:06,750 --> 00:29:10,875 ♪ And if I lose my way ♪ 722 00:29:10,958 --> 00:29:14,708 ♪ You know I would ♪ 723 00:29:14,791 --> 00:29:16,500 ♪ Escape ♪ 724 00:29:22,916 --> 00:29:26,416 ♪ Damaged by disease ♪ 725 00:29:26,500 --> 00:29:30,333 ♪ The sun blaze over me ♪ 726 00:29:30,416 --> 00:29:33,500 ♪ Ooh, baby, tie me down ♪ 727 00:29:33,583 --> 00:29:36,750 ♪ I am dangling ♪