1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,320 [Heavy breathing] 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:05,920 [Sean] Did I say something wrong? 3 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,240 Kate? 4 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:08,400 -Hey, where are you going? -[Door opens] 5 00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:09,920 -[Door squeaks] -[Kate breathes heavily] 6 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:10,840 -[Door closes] -[Kate pants] OK. 7 00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:12,480 -[Tap squeaks] -[Water runs] 8 00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:13,360 [Sean] Kate! 9 00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:14,920 What's going on? 10 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,360 Nothing! Just need a minute. 11 00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:18,440 [Whoosh!] 12 00:00:18,520 --> 00:00:19,600 Kate, it's me, 13 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:23,000 Lindy Darwin-Paul from 'Wake Up, Australia!' 14 00:00:23,080 --> 00:00:24,040 in the flesh. 15 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:25,240 -[Giggles] -No, no, no. No. 16 00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:26,320 Well, not in the flesh, exactly. 17 00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:27,600 But, hey, no, you'll remember this, OK? 18 00:00:27,680 --> 00:00:30,640 Um, hello, exercise. Bye-bye, thunder thighs. 19 00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:33,400 Remember? Oh, babe, no, you can't walk through stuff. 20 00:00:33,480 --> 00:00:35,160 -That's a dead-person thing. -[Door closes] 21 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:38,240 [Theme music] 22 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:41,000 [Electricity crackles] 23 00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:45,480 Good news is she can see us. 24 00:00:45,560 --> 00:00:47,640 Bad news is she didn't recognise me. 25 00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:48,840 How is that bad news? 26 00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:50,560 -How is that news? -[Gideon] Splendid. 27 00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:51,880 Now we shall simply parley with this woman 28 00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:52,960 on who lives where. 29 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:55,080 -As in, we stay and she goes. -Where? 30 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:56,680 [Miranda] To one of her other properties. 31 00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:58,080 As an heiress, she'll have several. 32 00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:00,440 Guys, why are we so obsessed with making her leave? 33 00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:01,840 Now we can finally find out 34 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:04,400 all the important stuff that's happened since we died. 35 00:01:04,480 --> 00:01:07,080 Like, did Freddie Mercury ever settle down with a nice girl 36 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,920 and is Princess Diana the queen we all knew she would be? 37 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:11,560 Are Kylie and Jason still together? 38 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:13,560 Oh, my God, did the Cold War ever get hot? 39 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:14,640 Was Y2K a thing? 40 00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:15,840 Did literally everybody 41 00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:16,720 do the locomotion 42 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:18,360 or just some people? 43 00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:19,560 Yeah. 44 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:21,360 Be a shame to boot her out now, boss. 45 00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:23,760 Says the heartless brute who kicked her into a coma. 46 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:26,360 Under the instruction of a complete mutton head. 47 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:28,000 Guys, I'm happy to be 48 00:01:28,080 --> 00:01:30,800 our official ghost-to-breather liaison. 49 00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:33,760 What gave you the authority? You're not in the clergy. 50 00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:36,320 -Or an admiral. -Or the emperor of Australia. 51 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:37,600 OK, learning moment. 52 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:41,200 Um, guys, people these days respect celebrities. 53 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:42,120 What's a celebrity? 54 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:43,160 Someone who's been on telly. 55 00:01:43,240 --> 00:01:44,600 -Or the internet. -What's a telly? 56 00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:47,640 -What's the internet? -What's someone who's been on? 57 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:48,640 Ghosts? 58 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:50,080 -Like...like, actual ghosts? -Yep. 59 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:51,960 Let's go lie down in your bed at the hospital. 60 00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:53,160 I'm sure it's just the drugs coming out of my system, 61 00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:54,320 or, like, concussion, 62 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:55,960 but they say it's best to stay awake, so... 63 00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:58,040 Oh, hey! Don't worry. I totally forgive you. 64 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:00,120 I mean, it must be super weird seeing a ghost. 65 00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:02,200 -[Sean] Uh... -Especially a famous one. 66 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:03,680 You're intimidated, right? 67 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:05,920 I was intimidated when I met Rolf Harris, 68 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,280 but then he was like, "Wobble, wobble," 69 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:08,840 and I was like, "Wow! He's harmless." 70 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,560 [Laughs weakly] This is a nightmare. 71 00:02:10,640 --> 00:02:11,600 We need to be ruthless. 72 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:13,000 So red is chuck and green is keep. 73 00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:14,360 Do you mind just starting over there? 74 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:16,280 I can imagine it brings up all kinds of feelings. 75 00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:19,680 You know, fear, gratitude, arousal. 76 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:21,160 [Sean] Hey, Kate, you sure you're all good? 77 00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:22,200 Stop worrying. 78 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:23,640 I just need you to help me with this. 79 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:25,160 Let's focus on the task at hand. 80 00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:28,640 Hey, Kate, I lost a gold nugget somewhere in the house. 81 00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:31,880 So, small favour, could you pull up all the floorboards? 82 00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:33,920 This is Joon. He's a miner. 83 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:35,840 Oh, the digging kind, not like a ghost kid. 84 00:02:35,920 --> 00:02:37,120 That would be sad, but not as sad 85 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,440 as, like, a kid down the mines. 86 00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:40,880 Thank God those child labour days are over, right? 87 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:43,040 Hey, where do they make clothes now? 88 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:44,000 Kate, are you OK? 89 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:45,480 'Cause this can wait, you know? 90 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:46,680 No, I'm totes fine. 91 00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:48,360 We just need to not get distracted by anyone. 92 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:50,640 As in, by you? 93 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:53,400 Yes, yes, because there's no-one else here, obviously. 94 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:55,120 Well, I'm here and Joon's here 95 00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:56,720 and we're all gonna be best friends. 96 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,120 Hey, should we make a blood pact? 97 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:00,200 Best friends forever! 98 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:01,200 [Quirky music] 99 00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:02,400 [Sighs] 100 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:06,040 Oooh, good. A corpse bride. 101 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:07,320 I beg your pardon. 102 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,680 My name is Miranda Persephone Bathsheba Munchen, 103 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:11,600 but I will also respond to 'Miranda'. 104 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:13,560 You are not real. I'm hallucinating. 105 00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:14,760 [Miranda] Oh, yes. 106 00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:17,400 One of my old servants used to talk to herself. 107 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:19,280 Idiocy, they called it. 108 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:21,400 Actually, she had your hair. 109 00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:22,880 It's just internalised racism. 110 00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:24,520 [Miranda] I'm a writer, you see. 111 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:25,680 I'm like Miles Franklin, 112 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:27,840 except without all that tiresome feminism. 113 00:03:27,920 --> 00:03:29,720 Internalised misogyny. Hm! 114 00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:33,040 And you will have the honour of scribing my debut novel. 115 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:34,360 Very exciting. 116 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:37,120 I'll dictate and you type, yes? 117 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:42,000 You are literate, aren't you? 118 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:43,080 -[Satan] Oi! -Whoa! 119 00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:44,240 Hey, no. Hey, come back. Listen, listen. 120 00:03:44,320 --> 00:03:45,160 I just want to talk to you, alright? 121 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:46,600 -Sean! -Hey, he can't hear ya. 122 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:48,600 Me and the boys soundproofed the place back in the '90s. 123 00:03:48,680 --> 00:03:51,040 Just so the neighbours couldn't hear the screaming. 124 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,200 From the game nights. 125 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:54,920 Karaoke, 'Yahtzee'. 126 00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:56,560 -Murder mystery parties. -Oh. 127 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:58,240 And the murders. 128 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:01,320 Hey, listen, listen, alright? 129 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:02,800 I don't need an apology or nothing, 130 00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:04,720 but you overreacting and going to the hospital, 131 00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:05,600 that was a bit much. 132 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:06,960 Get out of the way! 133 00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:09,840 I'm trying to tell ya I'm not gonna hurt ya. 134 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:11,560 I'm barely even here. 135 00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:13,000 I'm made up of, like, dead air and that. 136 00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:14,320 You could walk straight through me 137 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:15,240 and you wouldn't even feel it. 138 00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:16,120 Ohhh! 139 00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:18,360 I walked straight into that one. 140 00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:19,640 [Sighs] 141 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:21,760 Alright, we're even now, yeah? 142 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:25,680 -[Whoosh!] -Now, you. 143 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:26,680 It's Kate. 144 00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:28,080 -Katherine? -Kate. 145 00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:30,120 Katherine, you must understand that we mean you no harm. 146 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:32,160 We simply wanted you to leave and never come back. 147 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:33,440 Now, as leader... 148 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:34,760 And who are you supposed to be? Captain Cooked? 149 00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:36,560 Cook? James Cook? 150 00:04:36,640 --> 00:04:38,120 The only thing he cooked was his resume. 151 00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:39,960 The man couldn't navigate his way out of a puddle. 152 00:04:40,040 --> 00:04:42,480 Now, in regards to that little bump on your head, 153 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:43,800 as leader of the ghosts, 154 00:04:43,880 --> 00:04:45,720 it is my responsibility to ensure 155 00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:47,840 that Satan takes full responsibility. 156 00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:49,040 [Scoffs] Satan? 157 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:50,360 The Prince of Darkness? 158 00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:53,560 No, my leather-bound first mate with the underbite 159 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:54,960 and the skin of a pirate. 160 00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:56,560 Although his real name is Brian, 161 00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:58,560 but I don't believe in changing names willy-nilly, 162 00:04:58,640 --> 00:04:59,920 not in my New Holland. 163 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,880 -[Quirky music] -You... 164 00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:03,200 Dismissed! 165 00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:06,000 Am I, like, too tough? 166 00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:06,960 -OK... -I'm too tough, eh? 167 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:07,880 ..so she didn't recognise me. 168 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:09,000 That's fine. 169 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:11,400 I mean, she's only one woman, unemployed, 170 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:12,960 on the verge of a mental breakdown, 171 00:05:13,040 --> 00:05:14,520 just my exact target market. 172 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:16,040 I mean, I could tell from her elbows 173 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:17,400 that she hadn't done my workouts, 174 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:19,200 but, like, what about my cookbook? 175 00:05:19,280 --> 00:05:20,480 And my Christmas cookbook? 176 00:05:20,560 --> 00:05:22,120 And my after-Christmas-diet cookbook? 177 00:05:22,200 --> 00:05:24,280 Linds, mate, she wasn't even born when you kicked the bucket. 178 00:05:24,360 --> 00:05:26,200 [Lindy] Dying really derailed my career, huh? 179 00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,840 But at least I reached my goal weight of zero kilos. 180 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,120 [Quirky music] 181 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:32,840 Wait, that's the tape of my show. 182 00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:33,920 [Satan] Tape? 183 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,320 [Blows raspberry] Who tapes brekkie TV? 184 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:38,000 Um, 2 million people tuned in to 'Wake Up, Australia!' 185 00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:38,880 every morning, 186 00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:40,400 many because of my segments 187 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:41,480 like 'Smoke Your Way to Skinny'. 188 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:43,160 We helped so many new mums. 189 00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:44,640 Oh, I'd murder a dart. 190 00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:47,440 [Tapes crash] 191 00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:48,320 [Lindy chuckles] Oh! 192 00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:49,320 Kate needs to see this tape. 193 00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:50,960 It proves my icon status. 194 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,400 You take...you take it to... 195 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:54,680 You take it to Kate, sir. 196 00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:56,680 Yes, let's go. Let's take it to Kate. Off we go. 197 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:59,040 We are taking it to Kate, aren't we? 198 00:05:59,120 --> 00:05:59,920 [Insects chirp] 199 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:02,160 [Mysterious music] 200 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:09,680 Don't worry, it's not blood. 201 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:11,200 It's afterbirth. 202 00:06:11,280 --> 00:06:14,360 I pushed a baby out right there. 203 00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:15,280 Me 10th, it was, 204 00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:16,160 so the little bugger 205 00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:17,680 practically walked out. 206 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:20,960 You'll be wanting at least seven if you're staffing a hotel. 207 00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:24,840 12, if they finally put in that railroad. 208 00:06:24,920 --> 00:06:27,560 Ooh, yes, I can see you're scared. 209 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,920 Mothering is hard, 210 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,440 but after a few... 211 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:34,520 ..it just gets harder. 212 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:39,160 Let's say a little prayer now, shall we? 213 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:41,320 Holy Father above, 214 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,520 bless Kate and her eejit of a husband 215 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:45,800 with a pitter-patter of little trotters. 216 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,560 Sow her womb with the seeds of life. 217 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:52,880 [Armour clanks] 218 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,760 -[Yawns noisily] -[Muttering] 219 00:06:56,840 --> 00:06:58,120 Hey! 220 00:06:58,200 --> 00:06:59,320 -Oh! -Nice PJs. 221 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:01,280 -No, absolutely not. Out. -Huh? 222 00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:02,880 Kate, your husband took something very important to me 223 00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:03,840 and threw it away. 224 00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:05,640 -We're not married. -Did I ask? 225 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:08,480 Kate, mirrors don't work for us anymore. 226 00:07:08,560 --> 00:07:10,000 Am I still Chinese? What do I look like? 227 00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:10,960 You're very handsome. 228 00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:12,360 Uh, thank you? 229 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:13,440 Now, about my novel... 230 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:14,960 Any other room. My bedroom. Go. 231 00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:17,000 Look, I don't know what Tash's told you about me, 232 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:18,880 but, uh, my divorce isn't final yet. 233 00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:20,800 -What? -Great! You met Lewis. 234 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,480 Wait, as in a Lewis that you can see too? 235 00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:25,320 He's hooking up the NBN. 236 00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:27,040 [Softly] Oh. 237 00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:28,840 -Hi. Hi, Lewis. -[Sean chuckles] 238 00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:30,640 -Hi. -Hi. I'm so sorry. 239 00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:32,600 I haven't slept very well, so I'm a little bit frazzled. 240 00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:33,920 Yeah, no, it's alright. 241 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,480 Look, you tree-changers are all the same. 242 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,880 You move to the country with dreams of growing your own food 243 00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:39,000 and making your own clothes. 244 00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:40,440 Then you get bored. 245 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:41,920 Then one night, you drink too much 246 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:44,200 and one of you say, "Maybe we should open things up." 247 00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:45,280 Ooh. No, no. No. 248 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:46,480 -Not what I meant. -Nah, I get it. 249 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:49,240 You all have fantasies about the hot NBN guy. 250 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:50,520 -Kate, what's happening? -I don't know. 251 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,520 You threw out my tape. 252 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:52,920 He complimented me on my pyjamas. 253 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:54,880 -I assumed that he was a... -[Lewis] A man of taste? 254 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:56,280 Yeah, I am. 255 00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:57,760 Because I'm an interior designer. 256 00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:59,800 -[Kate] Oh. -And I'm a plumber. 257 00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:03,320 And a chippie and a sparky and a landscaper and a roofer. 258 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:04,480 Which you would know 259 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:06,000 if you'd asked one single question about me 260 00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:07,880 before trying to get into my tool bag. 261 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:09,080 [Sean] Uh... 262 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:10,520 [Lewis] Thank you. 263 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,200 But, no, thank you. 264 00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:13,760 -[Sean] Um... -Wow. 265 00:08:13,840 --> 00:08:15,360 That's what you get for throwing out my tape. 266 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,200 There goes the highest-rated Airtasker within 100km. 267 00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:19,520 Lewis? 268 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:22,000 What is happening right now? This mirror is crazy. 269 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:23,400 [Miranda] It's not a mirror, you Luddite. 270 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:24,840 It's a time machine, 271 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:26,880 like the time machine from the novel 'The Time Machine'. 272 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:27,960 Yeah, or 'Back to the Future'. 273 00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:29,240 You can't go back to the future. 274 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:30,360 Why not? 275 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:31,800 Maybe if you don't understand the genre, 276 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:33,560 you shouldn't participate in the conversation, yes? 277 00:08:33,640 --> 00:08:35,200 Mate, you're not smarter than me 'cause you read a book. 278 00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:36,560 -It's called a novel. -Kate. 279 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:37,880 I understand if you have to ignore me 280 00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,200 in front of the general public, 281 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:40,360 my last boyfriend did the same. 282 00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:41,840 But now the general public is gone, 283 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,120 so I wondered if we could be best friends already. 284 00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:45,280 -Coffee? -Take me back to hospital. 285 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:46,600 Good plan. 286 00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:48,040 [Lindy] Everyone wants a famous friend, don't they? 287 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:49,760 -Stop touching the time machine. -[Lindy] Don't you? 288 00:08:49,840 --> 00:08:50,760 -Stop it. Stop. -[Lindy] Kate? 289 00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:52,360 -[Birds tweet] -[Car passes] 290 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:54,800 [Sean] We'll talk to a doctor. 291 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:56,520 I'm sure this sort of thing happens all the time. 292 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:58,360 [Kate] What, people are just suddenly hounded 293 00:08:58,440 --> 00:08:59,440 by needy ghosts? 294 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:00,720 What if the doctor fixes her brain 295 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,040 and then she can't see us anymore? 296 00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:03,600 Well, then we'll unfix her brain. 297 00:09:03,680 --> 00:09:04,720 -How? -[Gideon stammers] 298 00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:06,040 I'll get Satan to push her over 299 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:07,640 as many times as necessary. 300 00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:10,920 Aren't you guys excited to, like, meet somebody new? 301 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,360 That girleen isnae gonna be your friend. 302 00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:15,160 She's young and alive. 303 00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:16,440 You're old and dead. 304 00:09:16,520 --> 00:09:18,520 Now, the key will be to run at it at speed. 305 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:19,880 [Lindy] I may never get to have any female friends 306 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,120 because they're always so jealous of me 307 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:22,000 because of the way that I... 308 00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:23,240 [Miranda] What are you doing? 309 00:09:23,320 --> 00:09:24,400 I'm going back to the past to tell my past self 310 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:25,400 not to lose my gold. 311 00:09:25,480 --> 00:09:27,000 But why are you walking backwards? 312 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:31,320 -Because I go back to the past. -No, you go back to the future. 313 00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:32,680 Argh, Satan! We have been over this. 314 00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:33,840 -Huh? -Just concentrate. 315 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:36,280 I got two callbacks for 'Young Talent Time'. 316 00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:38,600 I was nominated for Best New Talent at the Logies. 317 00:09:38,680 --> 00:09:40,120 Please calm yourself. 318 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:41,400 I sang at Carols by Candlelight. [Laughs] 319 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:42,480 -[Electricity crackles] -Lindy... 320 00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:44,000 -Here I go. -[Gideon] The electricity! 321 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,000 Back to the goldmine. 'Bye, everyone! 322 00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:47,520 [Screeches] I was on the cover of 'TV Week' magazine. 323 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:48,480 -[Miranda] Careful! -[Electricity crackles] 324 00:09:48,560 --> 00:09:49,360 [Gasps] 325 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:50,360 Now look what you've done. 326 00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:51,280 Joon could be lost 327 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:52,280 in the past forever. 328 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:53,360 I'm sorry. 329 00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:54,840 Joon? 330 00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:56,360 You in the past, mate? 331 00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:59,960 I'm in some kind of teacup/bowl cave. 332 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,760 Yeah, I'm 90% sure he's in the kitchen. 333 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:05,000 [Paramedics chatter indistinctly] 334 00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:06,840 -[Sean] Hey? -[Kate] Hey. 335 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:08,640 I'm sure it's just a concussion 336 00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:10,120 or maybe the stress of living with my boyfriend 337 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:11,120 for the first time 338 00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:12,560 or sudden home ownership. 339 00:10:12,640 --> 00:10:15,280 Um, but I'm seeing people from different time periods 340 00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:18,600 and they want things from me all the time, all day. 341 00:10:18,680 --> 00:10:20,800 Now, there's no need to get hysterical. 342 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:22,600 Excuse me? 343 00:10:22,680 --> 00:10:23,640 It seems the accident 344 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:25,040 brought you so close to death 345 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:27,600 that you gained the ability to see dead people. 346 00:10:27,680 --> 00:10:29,880 Oh! So that's like an actual diagnosable... 347 00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:31,120 -Well, not exactly... -Like a medical condition... 348 00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:32,280 Listen, sweetheart. 349 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:33,880 Like I told my wife, 350 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:37,600 you need to calm down and listen while a man is talking. 351 00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:38,880 [Knock at door] 352 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:41,400 -[Door opens] -[Gasps] 353 00:10:42,680 --> 00:10:44,080 Sorry to keep you. 354 00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:45,320 I'm Dr Green. 355 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:46,520 Don't worry. 356 00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:48,040 She's good...for a woman. 357 00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:50,080 -[Whoosh!] -So what seems to be a problem? 358 00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:51,640 [Laughs nervously] 359 00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:54,360 In terms of your CT scan, everything looks fine. 360 00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:56,560 -[Pages rustle] -Sorry, are you dead? 361 00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:00,880 -[Satan grunts manfully] -Move, move, move those boxes! 362 00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:02,960 Pivot from the pelvis just like Elvis. 363 00:11:03,040 --> 00:11:04,280 Come on, big boy. 364 00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:06,560 You can do it. Find the tape. 365 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:07,920 Why do you want this tape so bad? 366 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,600 Because if I wasn't famous, then who am I? [Chuckles] 367 00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:15,840 I just feel like I don't have any friends in the house. 368 00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,880 You know, Mum and I were so close. 369 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:19,160 We shared everything. 370 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:21,920 Dreams, clothes, men. 371 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:22,960 What? 372 00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:24,320 With Eileen, there's a generation gap. 373 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:25,600 I mean, there's like 10 gaps. 374 00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:28,040 And with Miranda, she has... How do I say this? 375 00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:29,120 Stick up her ass. 376 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:30,280 No, that's mean. 377 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:31,760 Although, maybe that would be helpful. 378 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:33,280 She has terrible posture. 379 00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:35,040 You know... 380 00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:38,120 Maybe I'm just not best friend material. 381 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:39,200 [Downcast music] 382 00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:40,560 [Satan] What are you talking about? 383 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:41,760 -You're fit. -[Lindy chuckles] 384 00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:44,320 -Pretty hot. -Yeah. 385 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,120 And those are really important best friend qualities. 386 00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:50,720 But I just feel like maybe I wasn't important to anyone. 387 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:53,160 You know, I wasn't a third commander like Gideon, 388 00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:56,200 or a wife or a mum. 389 00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:58,040 [Satan] Yet. 390 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:00,760 You weren't a mum yet. 391 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:03,320 Satan, with the amount of chardonnay I had for breakfast, 392 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:04,520 I was never going to be a mum. 393 00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:06,000 Ah, drunk people have kids all the time. 394 00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:07,760 Look at Eileen - she's got, like, 30 of them. 395 00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:10,720 I just mean, like, I feel like I don't have a best friend 396 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:12,480 that I can talk to in the house. 397 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:15,760 And forever feels like a really long time... 398 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,600 -[Clears throat] -..to not have a best friend. 399 00:12:17,680 --> 00:12:19,480 [Tender music] 400 00:12:19,560 --> 00:12:20,720 Um... 401 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,080 I mean, you can talk to me, Lindy. We're mates. 402 00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:34,920 Satan, everyone knows that men and women can't be friends. 403 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:36,600 Someone always falls in love eventually. 404 00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:38,880 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, eventually. 405 00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:42,600 It's a universal fact. 406 00:12:42,680 --> 00:12:43,920 Like, how women can't drive 407 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,840 and men shouldn't be left alone with children. 408 00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,040 Ohhh. 409 00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:52,120 I don't know, that's a bit harsh, don't you think? 410 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:53,560 Some women can drive. 411 00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:55,720 Yeah, legally. Yeah. 412 00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:57,040 [Lindy chuckles] 413 00:12:57,120 --> 00:12:58,040 [Satan] Yeah. 414 00:12:58,120 --> 00:12:59,480 [Birds tweet] 415 00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:00,720 [Satan] Uh... 416 00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:05,240 -[Phone rings in distance] -[Indistinct chatter] 417 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:08,280 Oh, hey. How'd you go? 418 00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:09,560 -You cured? -Um... 419 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:10,880 [Eerie music] 420 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:13,600 I'm free! [Giggles] 421 00:13:13,680 --> 00:13:16,120 [Laughs maniacally] 422 00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:17,920 -[Whoosh!] -[Ghost groans] 423 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:19,000 Can we get out of here? 424 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:20,760 Yeah, yeah, come on. 425 00:13:20,840 --> 00:13:22,520 Let's go. 426 00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:24,640 Hey, what happened? 427 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:26,760 [Kate grunts] 428 00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:29,400 [Quirky, uneasy music] 429 00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:34,320 [Woman] More pills? 430 00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:35,320 Do you have any pills? 431 00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:37,320 -Where are my pills? -Look out! Stop! 432 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:38,520 -[Engine revs] -[Ghost cyclist groans] 433 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:39,720 Ooh. 434 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:41,520 [Music crescendos] 435 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:47,760 [Sean sighs wearily] 436 00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:49,680 OK, so... 437 00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:51,120 ..dead people everywhere. 438 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:53,840 Yep, with horrific injuries. 439 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:55,600 What? Kate, that's awful. 440 00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:57,400 Are they, like... 441 00:13:57,480 --> 00:13:58,480 [Whispers] ..evil? 442 00:13:58,560 --> 00:14:00,240 Well, one of the ones in there 443 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:01,720 is literally Captain Cook's frenemy, so... 444 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:02,600 Oh. [Puffs] 445 00:14:02,680 --> 00:14:03,640 Is there any mob? 446 00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:05,400 Like...like, can you see any ancestors? 447 00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:07,360 No, I can't... 448 00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:08,480 -Ohh! -Whoa, what? 449 00:14:08,560 --> 00:14:10,280 -What? -It's the hot Chinese miner. 450 00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:11,880 OK, you didn't mention he was hot. 451 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:13,480 Yeah, well, he's also pantless. 452 00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:14,800 What? 453 00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:17,040 And he's... Ooh, yep, he's right up in my face. 454 00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:18,560 Can you come fix the time machine? 455 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:20,000 I just ended up in the kitchen. 456 00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:23,200 Um, can't they just walk through windows? 457 00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:24,360 Yeah, I don't know why I did that. 458 00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:26,160 -[Sean] Hmm. -[Breathes shakily] 459 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:27,720 Sean, what are we gonna do? 460 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,560 OK, you know what? 461 00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:31,280 We just...we just leave the house, yeah? 462 00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:33,640 And we'll deal with all that horrible loan stuff later. 463 00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:37,040 [Quirky, light-hearted music] 464 00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:41,440 No! This is my house, Sean. 465 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:42,840 I'm not leaving. 466 00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:44,240 So they have to. 467 00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:46,360 Yeah, yeah. 468 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:47,880 Yeah... Oh, you know what? 469 00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:49,040 Why don't we call your mum 470 00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:51,040 and we can do, like, a smoking ceremony, 471 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:52,680 like she did for Uncle Tony last year, 472 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:55,120 and she can just smoke out the bad spirits 473 00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:57,760 and now that I'm looking at you, maybe not. 474 00:14:57,840 --> 00:14:59,600 -No. -No. 475 00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:01,480 I don't want to get Mum involved, Sean. 476 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:04,040 Also, I'm not from here, so it's really not our place. 477 00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:05,600 Valuable teaching moment. 478 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:08,440 But they don't know that. 479 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:10,440 [Music brightens] 480 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:15,360 OK, I am giving you one hour to vacate the premises 481 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:17,240 or I'm smoking you out, mob rules. 482 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:20,320 [Ghosts laugh] 483 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:21,960 Why are you laughing? 484 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:24,520 Girleen, that isnae how it works. 485 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,080 Mother said ladies who smoke in public are strumpets. 486 00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:27,160 Are you kidding? 487 00:15:27,240 --> 00:15:29,520 Smoking looks cool, it burns calories, 488 00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:30,960 it helps you breathe shorter. 489 00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:32,760 It's like the only thing in life without a downside. 490 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:35,320 I'm not smoking ciggies. I'm gonna smoke you out of here. 491 00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:36,920 I wish you would stop talking about smoking. 492 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,400 [Sean grunts and groans] 493 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,440 -Huh! -That was awesome. 494 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,040 If it was that easy, I would have been sucked off 495 00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:45,560 after the fire of 1895. 496 00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:47,000 Wait, sucked...sucked off? 497 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:48,480 Did the pantless ghost say that? 498 00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:50,960 It's the process of ascending from this mortal realm 499 00:15:51,040 --> 00:15:52,160 to whatever lies above. 500 00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:53,960 -Or below. -[Eileen] Eejit. 501 00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:55,880 That's going down. 502 00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:56,800 Going down? 503 00:15:56,880 --> 00:15:58,880 -Was this place a brothel? -No. 504 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:01,000 -Aye, for a short time, it was. -Yes. 505 00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:02,440 I am so in the dark. 506 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:04,640 Bit of ghost logic, Kate - you stay where you die. 507 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:06,360 And how you die. 508 00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:07,440 Oh, yes, I can see that. 509 00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:08,680 It was a misunderstanding. 510 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:11,400 Hang on, so you are all stuck here. 511 00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:14,000 Do you think I would cohabitate with these people otherwise? 512 00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:15,600 [Gideon] 'Stuck' is a negative term. 513 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:18,240 I'm honoured to stand guard over my land. 514 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:20,680 Always was, always will be. 515 00:16:20,760 --> 00:16:22,400 That's why you'll always be a human kebab. 516 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:24,120 -Oh, I'd murder a kebab. -[Switch clicks] 517 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:25,320 Sorry. [Giggles nervously] 518 00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,040 The electricity fritzes 519 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:30,040 whenever I get upset or excited or horny. 520 00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:31,840 -That still happens? -Yeah, I still get stiffies. 521 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:33,400 Yeah, everyone's seen it. You want to take a look? 522 00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:35,000 Speak for yourselves. 523 00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:37,320 My curtains are practically canvas. 524 00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:39,240 They repel all water. 525 00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:40,120 What, like Driza-Bone? 526 00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:41,600 [Feebly] Aye, as a bone. 527 00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:44,200 Dry as a bone. 528 00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:46,240 [Sean] What's happening? 529 00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:48,360 -Is it working? -Yeah. 530 00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:51,280 [Lindy] Fixing the fuse box is a little tricky. 531 00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:52,960 The key is actually just remembering the order, 532 00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:54,840 which is easy because I've made it a dance. 533 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:57,120 OK, so it's yellow knob, red knob, 534 00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:59,080 wiggle, wiggle, boom, boom, 535 00:16:59,160 --> 00:17:00,680 turn around, underground, 536 00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:01,680 lights abound. 537 00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:03,080 Oh, that's nonsense. [Screams] 538 00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:04,080 [Ghosts scream] 539 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:06,240 Ohhh! What was that? 540 00:17:06,320 --> 00:17:07,800 -Oh, they're just convicts. -Uh, spiders. 541 00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:08,880 Spi... 542 00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:10,440 For some reason, they prefer it down here. 543 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:11,640 Don't ask. 544 00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:12,720 Why not? 545 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:13,880 Um, oh, because I don't know. 546 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:14,920 Sorry, I thought that was obvious. 547 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,320 Well, the dark reminds us of the ship. 548 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:18,160 -Such a magical time. [Laughs] -Yeah. 549 00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:19,440 I thought the conditions were awful. 550 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:20,320 [Convict] You've been talking to Gideon. 551 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:21,680 He was Third Fleet. 552 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:22,960 He would say that. 553 00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:23,960 [Convicts] Fake news! 554 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:25,600 First Fleet rules! 555 00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:26,880 Third Fleet drools! 556 00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:28,760 First Fleet rules! 557 00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:29,640 Third Fleet drools! 558 00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:31,200 Kate, hurry up, hurry up. 559 00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:32,640 The spiders are sensing my fear. 560 00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:34,240 -[Convict] Fake news! -OK, so follow me. 561 00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:37,200 So you wanna go yellow knob, red knob. 562 00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:38,400 OK. 563 00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:39,960 -Yellow knob. -[Both] Red knob. 564 00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,120 And then wiggle, wiggle. 565 00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:43,560 Is that necessary? 566 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,000 Well, your uncle once sat in the dark for a month 567 00:17:45,080 --> 00:17:46,480 because he didn't wiggle. 568 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:47,840 OK, um... 569 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,240 -Wiggle. -[Sean snorts] 570 00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,800 -[Circuits whirr] -Then boom, boom. 571 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:53,040 [Convicts and Kate] Boom, boom. 572 00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:54,080 Turn around. 573 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:55,560 -[Convicts] Turn around. -That one. 574 00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:56,600 -Turn. -Yes. 575 00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:57,560 [Knob clicks] 576 00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:58,600 Underground. 577 00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:00,240 -[Convicts] Underground. -That's it. 578 00:18:00,320 --> 00:18:02,400 -[Kate] Underground. -And there you have it. 579 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:03,720 -[Electricity fizzes] -[Convicts] Lights abound! 580 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:05,440 [Convicts gibber painfully] 581 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:06,600 [Convict] That's enough. Oh! 582 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:08,080 -Turn it off! -Turn it off! 583 00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:09,360 -[Laughs] -How'd you do that? 584 00:18:09,440 --> 00:18:10,920 It's Lindy, right? 585 00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,080 Yes. 586 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:13,720 Um... [Chuckles awkwardly] 587 00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:15,240 But you can just call me, 588 00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:17,320 "This is my new best friend, Lindy." 589 00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:19,160 -[Whoosh!] -[Lindy groans] 590 00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:20,640 -[Lindy grunts] -[Convicts] Oh. 591 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:21,880 -[Groans painfully] -Are you alright? 592 00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:23,680 Mm! Yes. Goo... 593 00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:27,080 I just...I feel so happy that I could die... 594 00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:28,160 [Grunts and inhales] ..again. 595 00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:31,280 -He wasn't going fast enough. -That's what I said. 596 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:32,160 That's why he ended up 597 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:33,080 in the kitchen, not the past. 598 00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:34,640 -You don't listen to me. -88mph. 599 00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:35,640 [Kate] Alright. 600 00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:36,800 Who wants to watch 601 00:18:36,880 --> 00:18:38,720 a bit of 'Wake Up, Australia'? 602 00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:40,240 -Where's your telly? -What do you think that is? 603 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,840 Well, it's certainly not a time machine. 604 00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,680 I told you that. Time machines look like cars. 605 00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:44,680 [Miranda] Oh, you... 606 00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:45,680 -[Satan] Sit down. -[Kate sighs] 607 00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:47,960 OK. 608 00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:49,960 [Video] Welcome to Pump and Dump, mummies. 609 00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:51,200 Just because you're stuck in the house... 610 00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:53,320 -It's my tape. -[Kate laughs] 611 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:55,120 Oh, my God, it's actually you. [Laughs] 612 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:57,240 Whoa. You look great. 613 00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:58,240 You're welcome. 614 00:18:58,320 --> 00:18:59,360 [Video] Grab anything heavy. 615 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:01,080 Your man's tinnies will do just fine. 616 00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:02,280 Ooh! Oh, I know her. 617 00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:03,840 My mum had all her videos. 618 00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:04,880 I used to watch them all the time 619 00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:05,760 when my parents went to bed, 620 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:06,640 and oh, my God, 621 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:07,520 she's in the room, isn't she? 622 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:08,560 [Pop music plays on video] 623 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:10,120 [Miranda sighs] There you go, Lindy. 624 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,560 You were famous... to self-polluting young men. 625 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,000 I know, and it's all I ever wanted. 626 00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:15,960 -[Miranda] Ugh! -Until now. 627 00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:17,280 Now I want friendship as well. 628 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:19,160 Hey, babe, can you...can you tell her I was joking? 629 00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,160 I was joking. I was joking, obviously. 630 00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:22,960 -It's so fine. -Oh, don't worry. 631 00:19:23,040 --> 00:19:24,120 You just made her afterlife. 632 00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:25,280 We both did. 633 00:19:25,360 --> 00:19:26,520 [Video] And pass it to your husband. 634 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,720 Get that beer out of the esky. Yes! 635 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,960 And pass it to your bloke. OK. 636 00:19:31,040 --> 00:19:34,480 And remember, if you're hungry... No, you're not. 637 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:35,720 [Lindy giggles on video] 638 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:37,440 I actually thought it would get her sucked off, 639 00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:38,760 but no. 640 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,400 I will need an explanation for that at some point. 641 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:42,400 We'll do it later. 642 00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:43,280 [Video] We're marching 643 00:19:43,360 --> 00:19:45,160 like we're in the army. 644 00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:46,360 [Laughs] Just kidding. 645 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:48,000 We're girls. We can't join. 646 00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:49,400 Pick up your knees, Sheree. 647 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:51,760 I saw you have that cheesecake at lunch. [Laughs] 648 00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:53,760 [Sheep bleat on video] 649 00:19:55,040 --> 00:19:55,880 [Sean] Oh. 650 00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:57,080 Um, what hap...what happened? 651 00:19:57,160 --> 00:19:58,280 [Sean] Oh. 652 00:19:58,360 --> 00:19:59,440 [Sheep bleat] 653 00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:01,240 Uncle Alfred taped over you. Sorry. 654 00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:02,240 No, please. 655 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,360 [Satan] That's all good, Linds. 656 00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:05,040 We'll watch a family movie instead, yeah? 657 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:07,000 -Something like 'Scarface'. -Wait, wait, wait, wait. 658 00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:08,000 I want to see what happens. 659 00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:09,240 My goodness! 660 00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:12,160 That looks exactly like Daddy's prize Merino. 661 00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,680 Prince Woolliam Bunty McDanglerum. 662 00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:16,280 No, no, no. Change it. 663 00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:17,800 Is there anything on colonisation? 664 00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:20,080 What's that say? Colonoscopy. 665 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:21,640 Oh, that'll be right up your alley. 666 00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:22,840 This is nice, isn't it? 667 00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:27,720 [Sheep bleat on video] 668 00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:30,760 [Animals hoot and chitter] 669 00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:34,360 [Sean] Mm-mm! 670 00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:36,920 -What? -Sorry. 671 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,520 [Sighs] Stage fright. 672 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:41,520 No, they're not here. We're alone. 673 00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:42,520 Promise? 674 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,360 [Bed squeaks] 675 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,480 [Kate] Yeah. Promise. 676 00:20:47,560 --> 00:20:48,800 [Sean laughs] 677 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:49,920 [Kate] Hmm. 678 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,000 -[Electricity crackles] -[Kate] Mm! 679 00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:53,440 Hey, it's OK. 680 00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:56,040 I want to know all about your first pash. 681 00:20:56,120 --> 00:20:57,920 -Mine was with my cousin Leslie. -That's gross. 682 00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:58,920 Can you please get out? 683 00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:00,400 No, it wasn't as bad as you think. 684 00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:01,280 We'd known each other our whole lives. 685 00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:02,600 -So... -Out. 686 00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:04,440 At least my flatmates had boundaries. 687 00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:05,600 I have boundaries. 688 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:07,040 I just want to know how flexible Kate is. 689 00:21:07,120 --> 00:21:08,520 -Out. -Kate, I can't go. 690 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:09,640 It's our first sleepover. 691 00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:10,880 -'Sleepover Club'. -[Groans] 692 00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:12,600 [Hums theme song] 693 00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:14,600 694 00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:18,960 [Bright music]