1
00:00:02,127 --> 00:00:04,171
Principal Coleman,
we'd love to get your thoughts

2
00:00:04,254 --> 00:00:06,381
on the spike in teacher
layoffs throughout the district.

3
00:00:06,465 --> 00:00:07,674
Oh, I've got thoughts for days.

4
00:00:07,758 --> 00:00:10,302
This Abbott Life has been
begging for a sit-down with Ava.

5
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:12,095
I was afraid it would go off the rails,

6
00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:14,139
but they have some
really insightful questions.

7
00:00:14,223 --> 00:00:15,849
I mean, this may be our best episode yet.

8
00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:18,685
But is this really how
you want to use my airtime?

9
00:00:18,769 --> 00:00:19,978
Podcasts aren't for information.

10
00:00:20,062 --> 00:00:21,104
They're for hot takes.

11
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:24,733
We love hot takes, but Mr. C thinks
we should keep things school-focused.

12
00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:27,069
Yeah, I think it would be
best if we just kind of stay on...

13
00:00:27,152 --> 00:00:29,238
Well, I'm his boss, so overruled.

14
00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:31,698
- No need to give me topics. I'll just go.
- Be our guest.

15
00:00:31,782 --> 00:00:34,368
An actor's height should be
listed on screen whenever they appear.

16
00:00:34,451 --> 00:00:35,494
Even if they're short?

17
00:00:35,577 --> 00:00:37,579
Especially. I need to know
what I'm working with.

18
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,122
Music should not be sad.

19
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:40,666
But… Giveon.

20
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No, sorry, life's hard enough.

21
00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:47,172
- Oh. Cheating is not a crime.
- Ava!

22
00:00:47,256 --> 00:00:50,217
- On people or on tests?
- Both.

23
00:00:50,300 --> 00:00:53,720
I mean, you shouldn't do it,
but it's not illegal.

24
00:00:53,804 --> 00:00:55,305
It's just a fact.

25
00:00:55,389 --> 00:00:57,224
I can't wait
for our listeners to hear this.

26
00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:02,771
I've already deleted the recording.

27
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What about Rehoboth Beach?

28
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{\an8}- Ugh. We really want to try something new.
- Yeah, somewhere neither of us have been.

29
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{\an8}Are you kids planning a trip?

30
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{\an8}Yeah, Gregory and I are taking
our first big vacation out of state.

31
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{\an8}Yeah, we want to go so far
we couldn't walk there,

32
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{\an8}- no matter how much I believe I could.
- Mm-hmm.

33
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{\an8}They're in the ideation phase.

34
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{\an8}Well, you know,
you can't go wrong with the Jersey Shore.

35
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{\an8}Just make sure that you call dibs
on your nickname first

36
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{\an8}'cause I was the original Situation.

37
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{\an8}Yeah, I think we want to go somewhere
a little more…

38
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{\an8}…not the Jersey Shore.

39
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{\an8}- Yeah, somewhere with outdoor activities.
- Yeah.

40
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{\an8}Fine, have a bad time, see what I care.

41
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{\an8}Like day drinking on the boardwalk
is not an outdoor activity.

42
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{\an8}How about wherever your finger lands
on a spinning globe?

43
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{\an8}We know the perfect place
is out there for us.

44
00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:00,037
{\an8}Yeah, we'll figure it out.

45
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{\an8}My advice, just pick somewhere
good enough and make the best of it.

46
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:07,127
{\an8}No couple ever agrees 100%
on the perfect vacation spot.

47
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Well, this couple can and will.

48
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Sorry, my bike got a flat this morning,
Elijah and I broke up,

49
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,386
and my kids won't stop
saying cream cheese bagel.

50
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Janine and Gregory are all I have.

51
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No designer labels.
Looks like a regular outfit, right?

52
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:24,519
Wrong. Those joggers, $900.

53
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{\an8}It's called stealth wealth.

54
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{\an8}Only another wealthy
like myself could clock.

55
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{\an8}Hey, hon, could I request a guest
pass for a Jonathan Pierce, please?

56
00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:34,071
{\an8}Who the hell is that?

57
00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,906
{\an8}Oh, he's an old student of mine.

58
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{\an8}Yeah, great kid, big, big success now,

59
00:02:38,784 --> 00:02:41,328
{\an8}which I can't help but think maybe I got
a little something to do with.

60
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- Which field?
- Finance.

61
00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:45,040
- Oh.
- And I knew he'd make it too.

62
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,709
{\an8}Kid was always whip-smart, real hustler.

63
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What's he drive?

64
00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,171
- Ava, you have a boyfriend.
- Reflex.

65
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{\an8}Yeah, I'm gonna have him talk to the kids,
give 'em a little motivation.

66
00:02:54,216 --> 00:02:55,592
Well, do you at least know his net worth?

67
00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:01,932
- Barbara. Talk to your kids.
- Hmm?

68
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:03,725
They're throwing away your class snacks.

69
00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:06,019
{\an8}What on earth are you talking about,
Mr. Johnson?

70
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{\an8}I'm finding stray raisins
and cheese rounds all over the school.

71
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{\an8}Uh-huh. Well, it's not my children.
Mm-mmm.

72
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They love their snacks and always have.

73
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I know what I'm seeing.

74
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,363
They're gonna bring in the rats.

75
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And when they bring in the rats,
what comes for the rats?

76
00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:20,784
I haven't the slightest idea.

77
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Bigger rats.

78
00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:25,997
- Please leave, Mr. Johnson.
- Suit yourself.

79
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But no one listens to the bald,
Black and beautiful protagonist

80
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until it's too late.

81
00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:31,920
Uh-huh.

82
00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:37,342
Hey, Jacob, we figured out
where we're gonna go on vacation.

83
00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:40,429
And you seemed so invested earlier, we
thought you should be the first to know.

84
00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:41,721
Thank you.

85
00:03:41,805 --> 00:03:45,642
Yeah, well,
we are going to the Outer Banks.

86
00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:46,810
Neither of us has been.

87
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,479
It's on Essence's top ten list
for vacation spots for Black couples,

88
00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:51,731
- and it looks really nice.
- Well, I think it's genius.

89
00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,317
I love the Banks.
Inner, Outer, and Elizabeth.

90
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:57,362
Isn't the Outer Banks where all
those white teens murder each other?

91
00:03:57,446 --> 00:04:00,657
No thanks.
Have fun getting merc'd.

92
00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:03,910
- Wait, that's just on the show, right?
- Yes, don't listen to her.

93
00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:08,248
But just to be safe, if you do see
a white teen, maybe across the street.

94
00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:09,666
- I do that anyway.
- Yeah.

95
00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:13,003
Right, well, now that that is all settled,
it's time for the fun part.

96
00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:14,796
The itinerary.

97
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,093
Melissa, your rich son is here.

98
00:04:20,177 --> 00:04:21,928
Man, I wish. I am not that lucky.

99
00:04:22,012 --> 00:04:23,472
Hey.

100
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:26,683
You are that rich though.
I know a $750 belt when I see one.

101
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Stealth wealth.

102
00:04:28,059 --> 00:04:29,644
It's great to see you, kid.

103
00:04:29,728 --> 00:04:31,438
Ah, it's good to see you too.

104
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:34,608
Oh, man.
Everybody, this is Jonathan Pierce.

105
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,194
He was in the first class I ever taught,

106
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- and he is in town…
- On business.

107
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:42,532
…from New York City,
but don't hold that against him.

108
00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,534
- Say hi.
- Hey.

109
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:47,954
Okay. Well, you guys
have got it good. Okay?

110
00:04:48,038 --> 00:04:51,541
Because I would not be where I am today
without Ms. Schemmenti.

111
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:55,420
I don't get sentimental about much,
but a former student coming back

112
00:04:55,504 --> 00:04:57,088
and telling me I made a difference,

113
00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:59,883
that's right up there
with an Eagles victory.

114
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:04,054
You know, Jonathan, some of these kids
have been talking smack about math.

115
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:07,516
They think it's about as useful
as a fork in a soup convention.

116
00:05:07,599 --> 00:05:10,435
Well, you know,
I used to think the same thing…

117
00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:12,020
…but things get a lot more interesting

118
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:15,482
when you start using math
to supersize your wallet.

119
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:18,235
$500,000 cash or lunch
with Beyoncé's husband?

120
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,445
Always take the money.

121
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:22,197
Jay-Z told me that personally.

122
00:05:23,615 --> 00:05:26,034
Okay, everybody, hey,
don't forget your homework.

123
00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:27,869
It could make you rich someday.

124
00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:29,621
All right, you're the real deal.

125
00:05:29,704 --> 00:05:30,705
How long you in town?

126
00:05:30,789 --> 00:05:32,582
Uh, you know, a few more days probably.

127
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:34,084
Great. Come back tomorrow.

128
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:38,046
I wanna talk NFTs, ETFs,
and W-H-Y they're not making me any money.

129
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,216
Man, I am…

130
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:42,801
I am just so proud of you.

131
00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:45,929
You're talking to the kids.
You're a businessman.

132
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,889
Thank you. You changed my life, you know?

133
00:05:47,973 --> 00:05:49,933
Not everyone keeps it real with kids,
but you?

134
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,226
"Stick it to the man.

135
00:05:51,309 --> 00:05:54,104
The system is corrupt,
so you got to get yours."

136
00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,522
And I stand by that.

137
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,232
So I wanted to ask you a favor.

138
00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:58,441
Yeah, sure, what's up?

139
00:05:58,525 --> 00:06:01,778
Well, I was hoping that you could
write a letter about my character.

140
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,154
Oh. For like a job?

141
00:06:03,238 --> 00:06:04,447
Close. For a judge.

142
00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:06,032
Oh. It's for a trial?

143
00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:09,119
- Not a trial. I got convicted.
- What happened?

144
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,038
A little crypto coin here,
a little NFT there, rug pull,

145
00:06:12,122 --> 00:06:14,332
and suddenly people want their money back.

146
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:17,210
Anyway, I'm looking at nine to 36 months,

147
00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:20,088
so I was hoping that you could
help me out with that.

148
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,259
I found a great vacation rental.

149
00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,219
And it has a kitchen
in case you want to cook.

150
00:06:26,303 --> 00:06:27,304
Ooh.

151
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:30,682
See, I have been looking at hotels 'cause
I thought we can then get room service,

152
00:06:30,765 --> 00:06:33,268
you know, or weird knocks
at weird times of the day.

153
00:06:33,351 --> 00:06:35,228
Okay, well,
what about a bed-and-breakfast?

154
00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:36,563
- Perfect.
- Yeah?

155
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:38,732
- Best of both worlds. Yes.
- Mm-hmm.

156
00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:42,235
Hopefully we can find one close to a spa
so then we can get massages.

157
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:44,279
- That'll be great after all the hiking.
- Mm-hmm.

158
00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:46,865
Or before.

159
00:06:46,948 --> 00:06:48,325
- Either-or.
- Right. Mm-hmm.

160
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,076
Oh, I also have the perfect route.

161
00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:53,788
If we leave by 4:00 a.m.,
we'll get to the Outer Banks by noon.

162
00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:56,124
Wait, were there no more direct flights?

163
00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:58,501
We should have did that first
because those go.

164
00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,837
Uh, I meant for the drive.

165
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:01,921
Oh.

166
00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,132
Why would we drive when we could fly?

167
00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:05,842
Flying's expensive.

168
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:08,094
Yes, but it's quicker, you know?

169
00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,764
Which leaves you more time to relax,
which is the point of vacation.

170
00:07:10,847 --> 00:07:14,351
Yeah, it's a, um…
It's a really scenic drive though.

171
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,394
Some people say it's better
than the Outer Banks itself.

172
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:20,774
The I-95, it's great. It'll save us a ton.

173
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:23,818
I don't really wanna drive.

174
00:07:24,694 --> 00:07:26,404
I'm not really trying to fly.

175
00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:30,325
It's Jacob.

176
00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:31,993
Oh.

177
00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:37,290
I'm on the edge of my seat.
Tell me the rest of your perfect plan.

178
00:07:38,541 --> 00:07:39,959
- We're still… We're, like…
- We're… It's…

179
00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:41,586
We're working on it,
pretty much right now.

180
00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:43,880
Well, then why did you answer?

181
00:07:44,881 --> 00:07:47,926
Okay, so if Sally and Tommy
wanna get from door one

182
00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:51,471
to door two as efficiently as possible,
they would take…

183
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:53,807
a straight shot.

184
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:57,727
Less than eight hours, same vehicle,
the most logical route.

185
00:07:58,645 --> 00:08:01,898
Hey, I couldn't help but overhear
your math lesson, Mr. Eddie,

186
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:04,818
and funnily enough,
I am teaching a sociology lesson

187
00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:06,236
with the exact same characters.

188
00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:08,321
- Second graders?
- Yeah.

189
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:13,451
Here are Tommy and Sally
smiling and laughing, right?

190
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:16,246
Having a beautiful and low-effort time
at the airport.

191
00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:17,664
Until their flight gets delayed,

192
00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:20,834
and then all that airport time starts
cutting into their vacation time.

193
00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:21,918
Mm-hmm.

194
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:26,005
Which is much better than being stuck
in traffic for hours in a cramped car.

195
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:27,590
Well, Sally could throw
her feet up on the dashboard.

196
00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:28,967
You know her feet can't reach.

197
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:33,680
- So...
- Sorry, not sorry to interrupt, children.

198
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:36,391
Mr. Johnson,
we're in the middle of something.

199
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:38,518
See that?

200
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:42,105
I've been stepping on raisins
and walking lopsided all day.

201
00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:44,524
And it's all your little faults.

202
00:08:44,607 --> 00:08:48,236
Excuse me, but nobody gets
to accuse my students

203
00:08:48,319 --> 00:08:51,281
of snack crimes without definitive proof.

204
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,908
In fact, I'm going to end this right here.

205
00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:59,497
Children, if you like the snacks
that I pass out, please raise your hands.

206
00:08:59,581 --> 00:09:02,625
I love your snacks. They're yummy.

207
00:09:03,251 --> 00:09:04,335
They're lying.

208
00:09:04,419 --> 00:09:07,589
Mr. Johnson, I have been teaching
kindergarten long enough to know

209
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,383
when my students are lying
and when they are not.

210
00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:11,718
This is a not.

211
00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:16,765
So please go look elsewhere
because I have a lesson to teach.

212
00:09:16,848 --> 00:09:18,308
Is it on gaslighting?

213
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:21,186
Because I know a few experts.

214
00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:24,189
Mr. Johnson, Thank you, sir.

215
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:25,648
Thank you so much.

216
00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:27,734
Is Jonathan here yet?

217
00:09:27,817 --> 00:09:29,486
I got a hot new investment to run by him.

218
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:32,280
Did you know you could put money
into your retirement?

219
00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:33,573
Yes.

220
00:09:33,656 --> 00:09:34,783
I did too.

221
00:09:34,866 --> 00:09:36,618
It's just that he makes it sound so fresh.

222
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:38,119
- Mmm.
- That man is going places.

223
00:09:38,203 --> 00:09:39,621
Yeah, prison.

224
00:09:39,704 --> 00:09:42,999
- What? For how long?
- Well, it depends. On me.

225
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,335
He asked me to write
a letter to the judge

226
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:47,378
because they got him on some crypto thing.

227
00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:48,505
But you know what?

228
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,382
All those finance guys do
that kind of thing, right?

229
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:53,301
- Yeah, all the good ones.
- Yeah.

230
00:09:53,384 --> 00:09:55,386
So, I believe in second chances.

231
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:58,139
Hell, I'll give you a third or fourth
if my mother makes me.

232
00:09:58,223 --> 00:10:00,391
It's the only reason
my sister is still alive.

233
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:03,144
Anyway, I wrote him the letter, so…

234
00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:04,479
You wrote a letter by yourself?

235
00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,981
Humans don't have to do
that anymore, Melissa.

236
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,363
I was cleaning up.
I found this trail of raisins.

237
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:15,115
I'm following it to see where it leads.

238
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:18,868
Probably to a giant rat king,
which would be horrifying and exciting.

239
00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:25,792
Oh, my God.

240
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:29,796
Hey, guys.

241
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,882
What's wrong?

242
00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:35,927
- Nothing.
- Oh, my God, it's worse than I thought.

243
00:10:36,010 --> 00:10:38,263
Elijah said nothing
right before he said everything.

244
00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:41,432
We're just having some
disagreements on the itinerary.

245
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:44,561
Yeah, he wants to start a vacation
with an eight-hour drive.

246
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:47,272
Seven hours and 37 minutes.
I found a shortcut.

247
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:49,107
You know what doesn't need shortcuts?
Air travel.

248
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:52,026
Okay. All right. How about…
Let's just take a breath.

249
00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:54,654
Um, yeah, it's just a…
just a bump in the road.

250
00:10:54,737 --> 00:10:57,699
Yeah. There are no roads when you fly.

251
00:11:01,578 --> 00:11:04,914
You two are
the greatest couple known to Jacob

252
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:08,168
and Abbott and probably the world, okay?

253
00:11:08,251 --> 00:11:10,670
You can figure this out. I know you can.

254
00:11:10,753 --> 00:11:14,340
You are Gregory and Janine,
super couple.

255
00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:15,675
Nothing can stop you.

256
00:11:15,758 --> 00:11:18,428
Okay, you know what? Jacob, you are right.

257
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,221
You would've been right
without holding our hands.

258
00:11:20,305 --> 00:11:21,389
Yes.

259
00:11:21,472 --> 00:11:23,766
Yeah, we'll figure something out.
We got this.

260
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,102
- Yeah.
- That's right, you will! And, yes, you do!

261
00:11:32,567 --> 00:11:34,444
But in the end, who helps Jacob?

262
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,780
- What?
- It's about time you showed up.

263
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:39,490
Feast your eyes on this.

264
00:11:40,950 --> 00:11:41,951
Oh.

265
00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,121
What in the world am I looking at?

266
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:46,789
Mount Cheesy Raisin.

267
00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:49,834
Remember what I've been saying to you,
and you've been saying I was wrong?

268
00:11:51,336 --> 00:11:54,797
My students have been lying to me.

269
00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:57,258
And they've been lying to you.

270
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:01,638
You gotta do whatever
it takes to get yours,

271
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:04,432
'cause believe me,
everybody else is getting theirs.

272
00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:07,477
Yeah, but you could also do
good things with your money, right?

273
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:12,440
- Like you could give it to charity or...
- That is a great point, Ms. Schemmenti.

274
00:12:12,523 --> 00:12:16,694
Kids, charities will go a long way
when tax season rolls around.

275
00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:19,322
- Doesn't anyone ever come after you?
- Oh, yeah, they used to.

276
00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:22,575
All the time.
That's why I do things the right way now.

277
00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:24,953
See, when you're
looking for people to invest,

278
00:12:25,036 --> 00:12:27,288
make sure they are vulnerable.

279
00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:28,831
Like desperate even.

280
00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:31,084
Okay, uh, class dismissed.

281
00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:32,752
Uh, class started five minutes ago.

282
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:34,921
Then do your worksheet, okay?
Let's go. Ticktock.

283
00:12:36,047 --> 00:12:39,968
Man, it's just that
inspiring the youth inspires me.

284
00:12:40,051 --> 00:12:43,054
That is a great line for the letter
if you're still working, by the way.

285
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:46,516
- Anybody need help with their math?
- Uh. Yeah.

286
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:47,976
What you got going on over here?

287
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:53,856
- Hey.
- Hey.

288
00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:55,316
Okay, so I figured it out.

289
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,986
Oh, my gosh. Great.
'Cause I'm still stumped.

290
00:12:58,069 --> 00:13:00,113
I know you don't want to be
in the car for seven hours,

291
00:13:00,196 --> 00:13:02,365
and I respect that, and I hear it.
So I have a solution.

292
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,617
- Flying.
- Atlantic City.

293
00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:06,744
That way the drive is
only an hour and a half.

294
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:10,707
Oh. But I feel like that's a place
that we could still walk to.

295
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,959
Yeah, but it'd be like 32 hours,
still pretty far.

296
00:13:13,543 --> 00:13:14,669
Okay.

297
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:16,963
But this option
cuts out flying altogether.

298
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,048
Absolutely.

299
00:13:21,718 --> 00:13:23,553
I wanted to go to the Outer Banks.

300
00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:27,682
Ah, there you are.

301
00:13:27,765 --> 00:13:29,767
Gregory told me the problemo went adios.

302
00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:31,019
My words, not his.

303
00:13:31,102 --> 00:13:32,812
So, what's the plan, Stan?

304
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:35,690
Atlantic City. Problem solved.

305
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,819
Why isn't your beautiful smile
reaching your beautiful eyes?

306
00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:41,404
It's great, you know. I just…

307
00:13:41,487 --> 00:13:45,199
I really wanted to go to the Outer Banks.
Out of the tristate area.

308
00:13:45,283 --> 00:13:47,660
But-But Atlantic City is great too.

309
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:52,498
That's it. I'm going full millennial
because you two are

310
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,542
Waves got rough, you stayed the course,

311
00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:57,587
and here you are arriving
on the coveted Compromise Island.

312
00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:00,965
Which Elijah and I can't seem to dock on,
but maybe I could bring the anchor.

313
00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:03,009
- You're right.
- About what? I know I just said a lot.

314
00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:05,011
Compromise is the key.

315
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:08,931
But what if there was
a better compromise out there?

316
00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:11,100
Exactly. Plenty of compromises in the sea.

317
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:12,894
- Let's go talk to Gregory.
- Ta-ta-ta.

318
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,563
I will talk to Gregory.
And maybe you should call Elijah?

319
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:17,231
Aye, aye, Captain.

320
00:14:20,443 --> 00:14:23,112
Wow, big things ahead for those kids.

321
00:14:23,196 --> 00:14:24,864
- Well, they loved you.
- Aw.

322
00:14:24,947 --> 00:14:27,950
So, um, you got any big plans
for after you get out?

323
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,410
Any takeaways from this?

324
00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:32,205
Yeah, lots of changes,
lots of room for improvement.

325
00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:33,915
- Okay.
- You don't have to worry about that.

326
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:36,459
I'm worried 'cause I looked up your case.

327
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:38,586
Senior citizens,
that's who you're scamming?

328
00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:40,505
I mean, come on. You got any remorse?

329
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:42,006
You got any plans to make it right?

330
00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:44,008
Oh, yeah, big time. All that.

331
00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:47,553
Okay, so I… I wrote the letter.

332
00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:49,180
Phew. Thank you.

333
00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:52,809
You know, it was no after no
until I was finally like,

334
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,770
"Hold on a minute,
who is the ultimate hustler?"

335
00:14:55,853 --> 00:14:57,230
- Right.
- "Ms. Schemmenti."

336
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:58,940
Next time I'm coming to you first.

337
00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:01,109
Okay, wait. Next time?

338
00:15:01,192 --> 00:15:03,444
No, you're right, I'm not
gonna get caught again. No paper trail.

339
00:15:03,528 --> 00:15:05,029
You taught us that back in the day.

340
00:15:05,113 --> 00:15:06,614
I never taught you to punch down.

341
00:15:06,697 --> 00:15:08,574
I taught you give them
a taste of their own medicine,

342
00:15:08,658 --> 00:15:10,910
not make it so nonna can't afford hers.

343
00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:13,621
Okay, look, I can't sign off on this, kid.

344
00:15:13,704 --> 00:15:16,332
No, no, no, no, no. Hold on. Wait.

345
00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,042
You're right. No more old people.

346
00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:20,294
I'll find a different group
for my next thing,

347
00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:21,963
and I'll let you invest.

348
00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:24,507
I'll give you a great deal. Okay?
Whatever it takes. I just…

349
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,008
- All right. Listen.
- I need that letter.

350
00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:28,594
You were a really bright kid, Jonathan.

351
00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:31,097
But more than that, you had a good heart.

352
00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:33,182
And I know it's still in there.

353
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:35,059
So that's it?

354
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:37,311
I guess.

355
00:15:44,819 --> 00:15:46,070
Mr. Johnson.

356
00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:47,530
I have spoken to my class,

357
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:51,159
and there will be no more snacks
on the floor or shoved into the cabinets.

358
00:15:51,242 --> 00:15:53,828
- Where they gonna shove them then?
- Nowhere.

359
00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:58,082
I've reminded them that snacks are
for eating and trash is for the garbage.

360
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:02,545
Although who knows if I can even tell
if they're being truthful anymore.

361
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,589
And I thought I had them all figured out.

362
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:06,299
These aren't the kids of yesteryear.

363
00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:07,925
Oh, honey, you got that right.

364
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:11,095
Between Pokémon,
YouTube Kids and the Zeus Network,

365
00:16:11,179 --> 00:16:13,055
who knows what they're
learning on these tablets?

366
00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:14,390
- Mmm.
- Tell you what.

367
00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:16,184
I got your back as long as you got mine.

368
00:16:16,267 --> 00:16:17,727
- Deal?
- Deal.

369
00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:19,937
- Hey.
- Hmm?

370
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:22,273
For your shopping, here's a list of snacks

371
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:25,610
that I've always wanted to try
that the kids might like too.

372
00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,653
Most of them have been discontinued,

373
00:16:27,737 --> 00:16:30,072
and the rest can only be found
in North Korea.

374
00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:32,533
I've got it.

375
00:16:33,534 --> 00:16:34,785
Got what?

376
00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:37,580
Okay, so I love how
you and I can compromise,

377
00:16:37,663 --> 00:16:39,582
but I thought,
what if there was a compromise

378
00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:41,584
that was a little bit more compromise-y?

379
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:43,961
Okay, I guess I'll be open to that.

380
00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:47,340
I thought that you would,
which is why…

381
00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:50,343
I went ahead and purchased
our plane tickets to the Outer Banks.

382
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,596
- Wait, what?
- Yeah, we both wanted to go there.

383
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,139
It's the perfect place.

384
00:16:55,223 --> 00:16:57,225
Money was the issue. I took care of it.

385
00:16:58,059 --> 00:17:02,104
Uh, no, the issue was that we shouldn't be
spending money on flights

386
00:17:02,188 --> 00:17:03,856
if we don't have to. It's a waste.

387
00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:05,983
Well, it was my money.

388
00:17:06,067 --> 00:17:07,777
I don't think it was a waste.

389
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:11,614
Look, you and I have always had
different philosophies on money, you know?

390
00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:13,950
You like to budget your tokens
at Dave and Buster's,

391
00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:16,244
which I think is insane,
but we make it work.

392
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:19,121
Well, it works because my system
yields the best result.

393
00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:21,207
Buying the tickets isn't a compromise.

394
00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:26,212
- All right, well, to be fair, your idea...
- Atlantic City was a good compromise.

395
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:28,631
Except only you chose it.

396
00:17:29,507 --> 00:17:30,800
It was a cheap idea.

397
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,219
I'd rather be cheap
than be bad with money.

398
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:34,804
What was… What was that?

399
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:37,557
Are those the chirps
of my jet-setting lovebirds?

400
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,103
Ready to go?

401
00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:43,980
- Ready.
- Yeah, yeah, let me, um…

402
00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:52,071
Hey. Did you send that man to the slammer?

403
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:57,076
Okay, well, I didn't personally,
but I kind of feel like I did.

404
00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:02,039
Come on. He is not your responsibility.

405
00:18:02,123 --> 00:18:05,042
It's not like you're his mom,
his dad or his teacher.

406
00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:07,086
Okay, you had me till the last one.

407
00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:09,672
He's had plenty of teachers
before and after you.

408
00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:11,799
Hell…
…maybe it was Barbara's fault.

409
00:18:11,882 --> 00:18:16,095
I just feel like he took
the wrong idea from my lessons, you know.

410
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:18,639
No offense,
but you're not that influential.

411
00:18:18,723 --> 00:18:21,225
If you were, you'd be getting asked
to write a lot more of those statements.

412
00:18:21,309 --> 00:18:23,352
I've written one
for every member of my family.

413
00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:24,979
But that's family.

414
00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:27,523
Look, this is how he wants you to feel.

415
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:29,400
The only thing scammers
love more than scamming

416
00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:31,277
is blaming other people for their scams.

417
00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:32,695
He did what he did.

418
00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:34,780
Yeah.

419
00:18:35,323 --> 00:18:36,657
Okay, yeah.

420
00:18:36,741 --> 00:18:39,076
Thank you, Ava.
I appreciate that. Thank you.

421
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:40,244
It's what I do.

422
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:43,789
Now, did he happen to explain any
of the inner workings of that scam to you?

423
00:18:43,873 --> 00:18:45,833
I'm not doing this with you.

424
00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:47,960
I need to supplement my income.

425
00:18:48,044 --> 00:18:50,004
I took a pay cut in my relationship.

426
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:59,805
Look, I think we both said things
that we didn't mean earlier.

427
00:19:01,432 --> 00:19:02,642
And I love you.

428
00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:05,353
I love you too.

429
00:19:06,687 --> 00:19:08,898
All right.

430
00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:11,150
So what are we gonna do?

431
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:13,736
I still think we can
make Atlantic City work.

432
00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:17,615
Gregory, I don't want to do that.

433
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:20,284
Okay, well, then I guess we're
driving to the Outer Banks then.

434
00:19:20,368 --> 00:19:23,162
- You're not hearing me.
- I am hearing you, but it doesn't change

435
00:19:23,245 --> 00:19:26,082
the way I feel about spending
money on flights. It's irresponsible.

436
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:28,334
You understand you're calling me
irresponsible when you say...

437
00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:29,543
- No, I'm not. I didn't.
- You are!

438
00:19:29,627 --> 00:19:32,004
- I didn't say anything about you.
- That's been the implications of this.

439
00:19:32,088 --> 00:19:35,508
- Janine, I don't want to fight about this.
- You think I want to? I don't either.

440
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:41,055
Maybe we just shouldn't go on vacation.

441
00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:43,307
So what, we're never gonna go on vacation?

442
00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:46,394
I would love to,
but if we can't figure out

443
00:19:46,477 --> 00:19:50,064
how to travel without pointlessly
spending money, then I don't know.

444
00:19:50,147 --> 00:19:52,566
Okay, well, that's not a good sign
for our relationship.

445
00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:54,443
Then I'm at a loss.

446
00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:56,946
That's not a good sign either.

447
00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:59,448
This shouldn't be this hard.

448
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:02,493
I mean, if we cannot
figure out something like this,

449
00:20:02,576 --> 00:20:04,453
then how are we even
going to make it together?

450
00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,497
We won't if we can't get on the same page.

451
00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:07,957
Then maybe we should break up.

452
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:30,020
That was not, uh…

453
00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:32,356
I have no idea what just happened.

454
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:37,987
What are you doing here so early?

455
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,822
I woke up on cloud nine.

456
00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:43,242
Elijah came over last night,
and we got back together.

457
00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:44,326
Life is good.

458
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:47,955
Thought I'd come in early
and take a gratitude stroll.

459
00:20:48,038 --> 00:20:50,583
Feeling pretty grateful myself
this morning.

460
00:20:50,666 --> 00:20:54,253
Now that I'm with Ms. Carol,
trash smells even sweeter.

461
00:20:54,336 --> 00:20:56,088
I'm happy for you, Mr. Johnson.

462
00:20:56,172 --> 00:20:59,049
And, hey, if you two ever need advice,
don't hesitate to come to me.

463
00:20:59,133 --> 00:21:00,926
Stay out of grown folks' business.

464
00:21:01,010 --> 00:21:03,262
I'm just saying, I've become
sort of the relationship expert.

465
00:21:03,345 --> 00:21:04,680
Ask Janine and Gregory.

466
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,932
They're in love as a clam
all 'cause of me.

467
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:11,228
Oh. That's Janine texting me now.

468
00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:22,531
Damn it, Jacob, I just put a bag in that.