1 00:02:16,059 --> 00:02:17,888 Third day of high school and I, 2 00:02:18,105 --> 00:02:21,144 Victor Knudsen was hit by epidemic. 3 00:02:23,533 --> 00:02:26,870 And we're not talking about your everyday epidemic like chicken pox. 4 00:02:27,082 --> 00:02:31,333 Or the flu. Nope, we're talking a case of total, incurable. 5 00:02:31,549 --> 00:02:33,793 'Anya-itis' 6 00:02:35,307 --> 00:02:37,052 Hello, gorgeous. 7 00:02:37,269 --> 00:02:38,646 It's not so much the fact 8 00:02:38,856 --> 00:02:41,943 that she's the most beautiful girl in the history of the world. 9 00:02:42,154 --> 00:02:44,482 It's that.. Well... 10 00:02:47,916 --> 00:02:50,492 - Whassup, ladies? - Hey, Peter! 11 00:02:57,060 --> 00:02:58,769 Why don't you boys go park my precious? 12 00:02:58,980 --> 00:03:00,940 Sure thing, Peter. 13 00:03:01,151 --> 00:03:03,479 If you scratch her, you die. 14 00:03:05,661 --> 00:03:08,867 Open house this evening. Please come by. 15 00:03:20,858 --> 00:03:24,611 Nothing feels quite like expensive wheels. Not even sex. 16 00:03:27,163 --> 00:03:29,476 You ladies should stop by Nick and Ernie's party tonight, 17 00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:30,913 it's gonna be off the hook. 18 00:03:31,129 --> 00:03:34,502 Especially you mama. I'll make sure you're on the VIP list. 19 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:36,845 Take a hike, losers. 20 00:03:37,058 --> 00:03:39,188 They'd never set foot at your retarded little party. 21 00:03:43,071 --> 00:03:44,899 Yo, Vic! 22 00:03:45,409 --> 00:03:46,821 Hey, Vic! 23 00:03:47,663 --> 00:03:49,742 Is he even alive? 24 00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:53,213 Come on, this is your big chance. 25 00:03:53,425 --> 00:03:56,382 Never mind the fact that shes the world's most unattainable girl. 26 00:03:56,598 --> 00:03:59,602 And that's... maybe her boyfriend. 27 00:03:59,813 --> 00:04:02,770 Just walk on up to her and invite her to Ernies party tonight. 28 00:04:02,986 --> 00:04:07,202 So what if she's a Senior? Nothing. It means nothing. 29 00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:11,159 Oh my god, what a smile! 30 00:04:15,637 --> 00:04:17,115 I don't think we've been introduced. 31 00:04:17,140 --> 00:04:19,634 Huh, no we haven't. 32 00:04:20,648 --> 00:04:21,691 Those eyes.. 33 00:04:22,777 --> 00:04:24,747 My name's Vic. 34 00:04:31,593 --> 00:04:33,264 'Vic cup"? 35 00:04:37,261 --> 00:04:39,528 That sure looks like your geek brother trying to score. 36 00:04:40,242 --> 00:04:43,215 How freaking stupid can you be, trying to score a Senior? 37 00:04:43,433 --> 00:04:46,537 Must run in the family. You wrote Paris Hilton, didn't you? 38 00:04:46,749 --> 00:04:49,388 She's not a senior now, is she? 39 00:04:49,604 --> 00:04:52,291 Besides, she's much more mature than high school chicks. 40 00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,220 Right. 41 00:04:55,986 --> 00:04:59,293 We could make the catastrophic film of the century 42 00:04:59,512 --> 00:05:01,232 about Victor and Anya. 43 00:05:01,444 --> 00:05:03,831 "What not to do when one wants to get some ass". 44 00:05:04,047 --> 00:05:06,136 We're gonna win Sundance! 45 00:05:06,356 --> 00:05:09,043 You do the directing, I'll cast the floozies. 46 00:05:09,252 --> 00:05:11,258 - Score! - Yeah! 47 00:05:13,283 --> 00:05:16,757 I think Esmeralda is just about ready... 48 00:05:16,977 --> 00:05:19,150 Adios, mamacita. 49 00:05:19,370 --> 00:05:21,794 Now there's pussy in the air, boys. 50 00:05:22,015 --> 00:05:25,956 - She sure does slide nicely. - Why Esmeralda? 51 00:05:26,172 --> 00:05:28,726 We can name her Anya if you prefer. 52 00:05:28,943 --> 00:05:30,149 What do you think Ernest? 53 00:05:30,370 --> 00:05:33,558 This is America, we can all dream, right? 54 00:05:34,233 --> 00:05:37,253 - Do you think shell come? - Not the first few times. 55 00:05:37,465 --> 00:05:39,638 Victor, my man, she's a senior. 56 00:05:39,858 --> 00:05:42,330 You'd have a better chance trying to score Angelina Jolie. 57 00:05:42,545 --> 00:05:45,852 I don't exactly think she walks around dreaming about a 15 year old 58 00:05:46,072 --> 00:05:49,881 who's never had any, except his own right hand. 59 00:06:15,292 --> 00:06:18,432 - Get lost, you little rug rat! - Alright, fine, lll leave. 60 00:06:18,651 --> 00:06:19,486 I'm sorry, 61 00:06:19,700 --> 00:06:22,278 I thought you were my hideous little brother and his stupid camera. 62 00:06:22,303 --> 00:06:26,077 I don't think Brian looks this great in a dress. 63 00:06:27,551 --> 00:06:30,907 Very sexy. You're out for some trouble tonight, aren't you? 64 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:33,126 - Aren't I always? - Yeah. 65 00:06:35,822 --> 00:06:37,625 - Anya's bedroom, take four. - Marker! 66 00:06:37,837 --> 00:06:40,774 Brian and Zack, that's it!! Get the hell out of my room! 67 00:06:40,986 --> 00:06:42,538 One more time from the top, Sis. 68 00:06:42,749 --> 00:06:44,848 And maybe you could lose the bathrobe in this take? 69 00:06:45,268 --> 00:06:47,107 Out now! 70 00:06:47,325 --> 00:06:48,030 Keep that expression, Anya. 71 00:06:48,249 --> 00:06:50,506 You're totally challenging Uma Thurman in Kill Bill! 72 00:06:50,726 --> 00:06:52,173 Get out! Scram! 73 00:06:55,815 --> 00:06:58,910 Come on Anya, get dressed. 74 00:06:59,125 --> 00:07:02,019 The Froshes are having a party and we're crashing it! 75 00:07:02,228 --> 00:07:03,628 What, Freshmen? 76 00:07:03,842 --> 00:07:07,101 Sure you'll fit right in. They don't have sex either. 77 00:07:07,897 --> 00:07:08,931 Thanks. 78 00:07:28,336 --> 00:07:31,313 - Hey, Ernie! - What's up, baby? 79 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:45,622 No sandals next time, buddy. We're running a classy joint here. 80 00:07:47,286 --> 00:07:50,628 Luckily, lm in a good mood. Hello. 81 00:07:51,134 --> 00:07:53,605 Wearing dancing shoes. 82 00:07:57,547 --> 00:07:58,818 So, have you seen her yet? 83 00:07:59,037 --> 00:08:03,132 If you are referring to your lady friend Anya, she was just here. 84 00:08:03,340 --> 00:08:05,281 - I told her to take a hike. - You did what? 85 00:08:05,491 --> 00:08:07,908 She didn't have an invitation, man. What do you want from me? 86 00:08:07,933 --> 00:08:10,404 But she doesn't, she doesn't need a... a... 87 00:08:10,622 --> 00:08:13,800 Bu, bu, but... Okay, geez, I'm just joking. 88 00:08:14,015 --> 00:08:16,368 That broad has totally ruined your sense of humor. 89 00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:19,474 Madames, proceed to the Garden of Eden. 90 00:08:19,932 --> 00:08:21,497 Nice! 91 00:08:21,711 --> 00:08:23,817 Yo, this place is packed with hotties. 92 00:08:24,028 --> 00:08:26,958 Forget about Anya and just grab whatever you can get. 93 00:08:27,172 --> 00:08:28,490 Which isnt a whole lot, 94 00:08:28,703 --> 00:08:31,551 but, you know, theres gotta be someone desperate enough. 95 00:08:33,296 --> 00:08:37,591 Man, you are a lost cause. Go make sure Ernie's still standing, will you? 96 00:08:38,385 --> 00:08:40,773 Come on, lets just try to get into "Avalon" instead. 97 00:08:40,992 --> 00:08:43,428 Peter just texted me and said it'd be happening tonight. 98 00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:46,699 Peter should just be happy you are practicing on some toddlers. 99 00:08:46,908 --> 00:08:48,555 Thanks for the confidence. 100 00:08:51,584 --> 00:08:54,843 - Are you still scared? - Of what? 101 00:08:55,059 --> 00:08:56,872 Of actually doing it with Peter. 102 00:08:57,087 --> 00:08:58,864 No. 103 00:08:59,404 --> 00:09:03,287 I mean, when we're alone together he's really nice and... 104 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,689 He says all the right things, its just 105 00:09:05,900 --> 00:09:08,453 Anya, if you don't wanna do it, you shouldn't do it. 106 00:09:08,672 --> 00:09:11,190 I do want to, I'm ready! 107 00:09:13,099 --> 00:09:17,017 I don't know. I guess lm just not sure if he's the right one. 108 00:09:18,064 --> 00:09:22,277 Listen, you cant just throw away a woman's greatest treasure, 109 00:09:22,491 --> 00:09:24,551 just because he wants you to. 110 00:09:24,767 --> 00:09:28,191 You have to wait for your one true love. 111 00:09:28,408 --> 00:09:31,138 The one you're gonna marry. 112 00:09:35,359 --> 00:09:38,030 - What was that? - It's in the Bible. 113 00:09:41,243 --> 00:09:43,486 You guys ever hear of role playing? 114 00:09:43,705 --> 00:09:45,449 You got it, doll. 115 00:09:53,386 --> 00:09:56,590 Two of Ernie's famous home juice. 116 00:09:59,269 --> 00:10:02,556 Get lost girls, Hanna Montana starts in 5 minutes. 117 00:10:05,111 --> 00:10:06,440 What was that? 118 00:10:13,791 --> 00:10:15,535 Hi... 119 00:10:17,212 --> 00:10:19,372 Such a lovely dress you're wearing, Anya. 120 00:10:20,509 --> 00:10:23,962 Nice fabric. They don't make them like that anymore. 121 00:10:24,181 --> 00:10:26,258 I just bought it, so I guess they do. 122 00:10:29,272 --> 00:10:31,680 Okay, Tom Ford, fashion week is over. 123 00:10:31,901 --> 00:10:34,772 - I'm Victor. - Hi. 124 00:10:37,075 --> 00:10:38,570 Are you coming or what? 125 00:10:38,786 --> 00:10:41,325 It's the nicest dress I've seen all night. 126 00:10:42,499 --> 00:10:43,543 Okay. 127 00:10:45,671 --> 00:10:49,088 That freshie really liked your dress. 128 00:10:49,301 --> 00:10:51,924 Hey, lets make a bet, whoever gets a freshie hooked first, 129 00:10:52,139 --> 00:10:54,631 has to pick up the tab later on at Avalon. 130 00:10:54,851 --> 00:10:56,560 You're on. 131 00:11:07,453 --> 00:11:10,408 It's the nicest dress I've seen all night? 132 00:11:10,624 --> 00:11:14,410 That's the dumbest thing I've said in my entire life! 133 00:11:18,469 --> 00:11:20,759 Ooooh! 134 00:11:21,766 --> 00:11:23,843 Freak out time! 135 00:11:48,221 --> 00:11:51,639 Just, just, just walk up to her and say. 136 00:11:51,852 --> 00:11:55,388 'Anya, baby, let's, let's groove. 137 00:11:55,607 --> 00:12:01,363 "I got some... R-rated moves for ya." 138 00:12:01,574 --> 00:12:04,493 Dude, what are you doing in here, boy? 139 00:12:08,459 --> 00:12:11,082 Okay. Don't mind me. 140 00:12:12,382 --> 00:12:16,547 Hey, come on, close the door, its not that big. 141 00:12:18,724 --> 00:12:20,848 Or, is it? 142 00:12:34,498 --> 00:12:36,206 Come on, you guys, walk! 143 00:12:36,417 --> 00:12:38,494 You can do it. One foot after the other. 144 00:12:38,712 --> 00:12:40,670 Dont tell me you're talking to your feet, Vic? 145 00:12:40,882 --> 00:12:44,050 - No, I, I... - Just go on up to her, man. Come on. 146 00:12:45,681 --> 00:12:46,761 Just do it, Vic. 147 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:50,895 Do it, man, 148 00:12:55,946 --> 00:12:59,447 Here comes your lover boy to comment on your dress again. 149 00:13:01,496 --> 00:13:04,831 I sense your credit card's gonna hit the limit tonight. 150 00:13:22,193 --> 00:13:25,694 Victor, my man, you obviously have something important to say. 151 00:13:28,035 --> 00:13:29,411 I'm, I'm sorry, what was that? 152 00:13:30,914 --> 00:13:33,537 Any hiccup experts in the house? 153 00:13:33,752 --> 00:13:34,867 I know a good trick. 154 00:13:50,234 --> 00:13:52,809 Come on, you've tortured Victor long enough. 155 00:14:02,210 --> 00:14:07,753 So Victor, do you want me to try to fix these hiccups of yours? 156 00:14:09,429 --> 00:14:14,508 I'll give you a great, big kiss if you can do one more hiccup for me. 157 00:14:39,515 --> 00:14:41,390 Victor? 158 00:14:42,561 --> 00:14:44,555 Victor? 159 00:14:44,773 --> 00:14:46,684 Victor! 160 00:14:52,202 --> 00:14:54,611 So, what will it be, big boy? 161 00:15:05,848 --> 00:15:06,465 Go, buddy! 162 00:15:06,683 --> 00:15:08,142 I, I can't do it. 163 00:15:09,729 --> 00:15:13,681 But the most important thing is that your hiccups are cured, right? 164 00:15:15,405 --> 00:15:17,612 Guess I'm stuck paying the tab tonight. 165 00:15:17,825 --> 00:15:22,205 That's the price you have to pay for having such a 'lovely dress... 166 00:15:25,838 --> 00:15:30,134 - Hey, I got the hiccups too! - No, no, no, no, I do! 167 00:15:44,868 --> 00:15:47,574 She would have kissed me! 168 00:16:05,275 --> 00:16:08,112 Zachary Jaaaaaaaaames!!!! 169 00:16:08,321 --> 00:16:11,324 That's my name, don't wear it out. I got the copyright, lady. 170 00:16:11,535 --> 00:16:14,537 You know I can't stand spiders! 171 00:16:21,008 --> 00:16:22,903 Then it's a good thing it's made out of licorice. 172 00:16:22,928 --> 00:16:25,420 Where did I go wrong? 173 00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:29,011 - When you and dad were getting... - Yes, thank you, young man. 174 00:16:32,735 --> 00:16:34,859 Sounds like you woke up your mom, Zachary. 175 00:16:35,072 --> 00:16:37,860 - Good morning. - Hi, Dad. 176 00:16:38,076 --> 00:16:40,236 What about Victor? Is he up yet? 177 00:16:40,455 --> 00:16:42,116 The old booze hound is hung over. 178 00:16:42,333 --> 00:16:44,826 Oh, don't be silly. Your brother doesn't drink. 179 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:46,874 Yeah, and I don't dig girls over 18. 180 00:16:48,468 --> 00:16:52,384 Victor, breakfast is ready! 181 00:16:52,891 --> 00:16:55,431 Oh, good morning. 182 00:16:57,607 --> 00:16:59,569 So son, any nice-looking girls there last night? 183 00:16:59,610 --> 00:17:01,438 - Yeah, did you get any pussy? - Zachary! 184 00:17:01,655 --> 00:17:03,779 You need to use a different language, young man! 185 00:17:03,992 --> 00:17:07,328 Yes, mom. Hizole consigue cono? 186 00:17:08,249 --> 00:17:10,159 Did you get to bump into any big jugs? 187 00:17:10,377 --> 00:17:11,623 Stop it! 188 00:17:11,838 --> 00:17:13,879 Back in my day, we called them melons. 189 00:17:14,091 --> 00:17:15,207 Christian! 190 00:17:15,427 --> 00:17:17,753 Well, some people did, but, no, no, not me. 191 00:17:17,972 --> 00:17:19,475 You know, I better get back to work. 192 00:17:20,935 --> 00:17:23,558 - Oh, don't forget this one. - Thank you, son. 193 00:17:25,025 --> 00:17:26,105 See you. 194 00:17:26,319 --> 00:17:30,189 So, what kind of trouble are you boys planning on getting into today? 195 00:17:30,409 --> 00:17:31,868 Nothing out of the ordinary, 196 00:17:32,078 --> 00:17:34,223 maybe knock over a liquor store, hit the titty bar. 197 00:17:34,248 --> 00:17:35,660 Oh, that's great! 198 00:17:36,877 --> 00:17:41,589 Hey, mom, did anyone call? 199 00:17:41,802 --> 00:17:45,636 No. Who would have called? 200 00:17:46,601 --> 00:17:48,927 Oh, I don't know. 201 00:17:51,817 --> 00:17:54,274 What if shes crazy about me, but just doesn't know it yet? 202 00:17:54,488 --> 00:17:57,776 In theory she already kissed me. It's all subconscious. 203 00:17:58,202 --> 00:17:59,663 She even smiled at me this morning. 204 00:18:00,790 --> 00:18:03,828 Anya's the type who'd smile at a child molester. 205 00:18:04,754 --> 00:18:07,710 If she likes you so much, why don't you go over and talk to her? 206 00:18:07,926 --> 00:18:10,632 Well, shes sitting with all the Seniors. 207 00:18:10,847 --> 00:18:13,933 What about that smart-ass Peter? Is she dating him or what? 208 00:18:14,144 --> 00:18:16,815 No, I'm sure they're just really good friends. 209 00:18:17,024 --> 00:18:19,812 Is Victor Knudsen really gonna go down in history 210 00:18:20,028 --> 00:18:24,492 as the Kentucky fried chicken who didn't dare fight for his own woman? 211 00:18:27,874 --> 00:18:28,705 You're right. 212 00:18:28,917 --> 00:18:32,454 No, time out, time out. Are you sure there are no hiccups on their way up? 213 00:18:32,673 --> 00:18:33,717 I got it covered. 214 00:18:33,925 --> 00:18:37,628 I didn't drink a single sip of water today, or yesterday. 215 00:18:38,516 --> 00:18:40,556 Good luck, Titanic! 216 00:18:40,769 --> 00:18:43,226 Cant you faint from dehydration? 217 00:18:45,026 --> 00:18:46,231 What's up ladies? 218 00:18:52,155 --> 00:18:55,124 Is this Candid Camera or did you just say 'whats up ladies"? 219 00:18:57,354 --> 00:18:59,912 I just wanted to say how great it was to see you at the party. 220 00:19:01,338 --> 00:19:03,091 Me and my dress? 221 00:19:05,992 --> 00:19:08,718 Don't you know little Freshmen aren't allowed at the senior table? 222 00:19:09,305 --> 00:19:12,442 Last I checked there was no reservation sign. 223 00:19:15,427 --> 00:19:18,027 Listen, you punk, I don't know what you're trying to pull here. 224 00:19:18,069 --> 00:19:19,914 But don't ever talk to any of us ever again, 225 00:19:19,956 --> 00:19:22,210 or I'll split your skull in two! 226 00:19:23,940 --> 00:19:26,324 Go buy yourself a Hershey's kiss, kid. 227 00:19:26,539 --> 00:19:29,640 No one in their right mind would ever give such a loser one for free. 228 00:19:33,710 --> 00:19:35,760 - Nice one! - Huh? You like that? Like that? 229 00:19:35,974 --> 00:19:37,095 Well done. 230 00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:45,239 'Go buy yourself a Hersheys kiss, kid'. 231 00:19:48,596 --> 00:19:50,683 - Hurry up. - Relax already. 232 00:19:53,460 --> 00:19:55,297 Check the stalls, will ya? 233 00:20:00,211 --> 00:20:02,549 Clear. Make this quick. 234 00:20:02,937 --> 00:20:06,741 I seem to remember you never liked it when I was too quick about it. 235 00:20:06,962 --> 00:20:12,031 Look, lm sick and tired of Anya and her unspoiled, virgin bullshit. 236 00:20:12,246 --> 00:20:13,420 What is she trying to prove? 237 00:20:13,504 --> 00:20:16,772 Don't worry, she knows she can't graduate a virgin. 238 00:20:16,984 --> 00:20:18,272 She said that? 239 00:20:18,494 --> 00:20:20,795 She said she wants to do it soon, and 240 00:20:21,010 --> 00:20:24,528 I told her the best way is to do it with someone with experience. 241 00:20:24,742 --> 00:20:26,168 Someone who know's what he's doing. 242 00:20:28,222 --> 00:20:30,523 Thanks for the compliment. Cant you 243 00:20:30,738 --> 00:20:32,372 prepare her a bit? 244 00:20:32,583 --> 00:20:35,970 - Prepare her, are you crazy?! - Just give her a few tips. 245 00:20:36,190 --> 00:20:38,722 I'm going to her house on Wednesday while her parents are playing Bridge. 246 00:20:38,747 --> 00:20:41,168 Seriously Peter, that's between you two. 247 00:20:41,389 --> 00:20:45,194 I wanna see my girl happy and I am not pushing her to do it. 248 00:20:51,537 --> 00:20:53,421 It was a lot easier with you back in the day. 249 00:20:53,634 --> 00:20:55,562 All it took was a ride in the Precious Junior, 250 00:20:55,730 --> 00:20:57,781 and a twenty buck dinner. 251 00:20:57,995 --> 00:21:01,382 Besides, when I've had Anya too, you girls can finally discuss sex. 252 00:21:01,601 --> 00:21:04,236 So, I guess I'll basically be doing you a favor. 253 00:21:04,452 --> 00:21:06,121 Chupa mi verga. 254 00:21:06,339 --> 00:21:08,808 Keep talking dirty, baby. 255 00:21:14,390 --> 00:21:18,326 Okay, Casanova. So you're gonna tell this girl you barely know 256 00:21:18,542 --> 00:21:21,643 that she shouldn't sleep with her boyfriend even though she wants to? 257 00:21:21,854 --> 00:21:26,339 Well, he's not really her boyfriend. But... yeah. 258 00:21:26,551 --> 00:21:29,055 - Great plan, Vic. - lt's not so bad. 259 00:21:30,367 --> 00:21:34,302 - Ah, God, you're so young. - But Peter doesn't love her! 260 00:21:34,518 --> 00:21:37,320 So? When did that become mandatory for love making? 261 00:21:38,502 --> 00:21:40,839 Come on guys, her house isnt that far away. 262 00:21:42,024 --> 00:21:44,611 - Hancock Park. - Oh, that's a rich neighborhood. 263 00:21:44,833 --> 00:21:47,785 Yeah, I bought the address off Zack, he's friends with her little brother. 264 00:21:47,811 --> 00:21:50,279 Doesn't that make you two practically related? 265 00:21:50,494 --> 00:21:56,481 Yo, the girl that your in love with 266 00:21:56,700 --> 00:21:59,384 happens just to be your cousin, 267 00:21:59,594 --> 00:22:02,695 Oh, doesn't that hurt a little buzzing 268 00:22:02,906 --> 00:22:05,840 going around in your little wedgie stomach. 269 00:22:06,051 --> 00:22:09,689 I can't believe your feelings just took a plummet. 270 00:22:13,725 --> 00:22:16,575 I can't rap, man, but I'm doing it for you! 271 00:22:17,122 --> 00:22:18,409 It's right there. 272 00:22:18,631 --> 00:22:21,315 - Wow! - Oooohhh! 273 00:22:25,131 --> 00:22:28,935 Damn! Your future wife is loaded! 274 00:22:30,624 --> 00:22:35,645 You guys stay here. Ill handle this. 275 00:22:37,165 --> 00:22:38,834 Heads up, Vic! 276 00:22:39,975 --> 00:22:42,992 - Hi, Victor! - Hey there, Anya. 277 00:22:44,126 --> 00:22:45,795 So, how about that? 278 00:22:46,013 --> 00:22:48,600 - It's almost Wednesday, huh? - Yeah, I guess so. 279 00:22:48,823 --> 00:22:50,289 You live around here? 280 00:22:50,500 --> 00:22:54,936 Uh, yeah, yeah. Um... no. 281 00:22:55,364 --> 00:22:58,501 - Here, ah, let me get those. - Thanks. 282 00:22:58,719 --> 00:23:01,223 So, ah, what's up with all the cans? 283 00:23:01,444 --> 00:23:02,827 Huh? 284 00:23:04,631 --> 00:23:05,752 Hi Anya! 285 00:23:05,973 --> 00:23:10,744 Well, we're turning great profits from the party by selling them. 286 00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,202 I didn't know you were such a businessman. 287 00:23:13,228 --> 00:23:14,945 Oh, yeah, sure. 288 00:23:15,156 --> 00:23:18,758 You know, me and old Billy... Gates, ha. 289 00:23:19,308 --> 00:23:20,566 Let the profits go to charity. 290 00:23:21,027 --> 00:23:24,914 China, Af-Africa, Ca-California... 291 00:23:27,984 --> 00:23:32,578 - So, its almost Wednesday, huh? - You said that already. 292 00:23:32,788 --> 00:23:35,851 I did, I did, yeah. That must make it a fact then. 293 00:23:37,054 --> 00:23:40,611 Look, I came to tell you, um... I wanted to ask you... 294 00:23:45,005 --> 00:23:46,578 You know my little brother Zack, right? 295 00:23:46,661 --> 00:23:49,270 He's friends with your little brother. Small world, huh? Ha, ha. 296 00:23:50,140 --> 00:23:52,283 So Zack's your little brother. 297 00:23:52,500 --> 00:23:54,279 Is that a good thing, or...? 298 00:23:55,855 --> 00:24:01,025 Yeah, yeah, he is. Good old Zackie, he's a real... bro. 299 00:24:01,445 --> 00:24:03,224 Victor, is everything alright? 300 00:24:03,433 --> 00:24:09,475 Hell, no. Yeah! Yeah, yeah, everything's just... dandy. 301 00:24:10,059 --> 00:24:12,909 - Well, I gotta get going. - Are you going to Peter's or...? 302 00:24:14,283 --> 00:24:19,206 No, I actually have an interview at USC. 303 00:24:20,412 --> 00:24:23,639 I'm really nervous. 304 00:24:24,512 --> 00:24:26,868 Do, do I look alright? 305 00:24:28,529 --> 00:24:31,710 You look... beautiful. 306 00:24:34,037 --> 00:24:37,264 Cool. I, I mean, thank you. 307 00:24:38,261 --> 00:24:39,874 I'll see you later, Victor. 308 00:24:51,016 --> 00:24:55,032 Oh, and I really don't want you to sleep with Peter on Wednesday. 309 00:24:56,234 --> 00:24:58,130 Come. 310 00:24:58,802 --> 00:24:59,837 I don't... 311 00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:03,316 Come on, what? 312 00:25:08,741 --> 00:25:11,473 It's a great opening. We need to make it juicierthough. 313 00:25:11,681 --> 00:25:13,130 Not to worry. That's under control. 314 00:25:14,704 --> 00:25:17,601 Victor's going to a party on Saturday. 315 00:25:17,810 --> 00:25:19,953 Anya would be delighted to see Victor, 316 00:25:20,170 --> 00:25:22,856 Saturday, September 10th at 3 PM, 317 00:25:23,069 --> 00:25:27,039 for her 18th birthday celebration. 3 PM. 318 00:25:27,252 --> 00:25:29,277 That's an hour after all the grown-ups arrive. 319 00:25:29,488 --> 00:25:31,467 I like where your head's at. 320 00:25:33,712 --> 00:25:34,748 One question gentlemen... 321 00:25:34,830 --> 00:25:38,846 The lnvasion of Norman die is what? 322 00:25:39,055 --> 00:25:40,998 Took place when? Lead by whom? 323 00:25:41,208 --> 00:25:44,930 Sorry Mein Fraulein, that's three questions, not one. 324 00:25:46,467 --> 00:25:49,977 D-day, 6th of June 1944. 325 00:25:50,194 --> 00:25:51,595 General Eisenhower. 326 00:25:51,810 --> 00:25:54,248 Damn, you ought to teach that shit! 327 00:25:54,460 --> 00:25:58,806 Yes. And you ought to get down to the principals office. Now! 328 00:25:59,015 --> 00:26:02,278 - Herut! - Darn! 329 00:26:06,470 --> 00:26:07,811 It's only an overnight trip, right? 330 00:26:07,836 --> 00:26:08,996 Yeah. So, lm not gonna pass. 331 00:26:09,037 --> 00:26:12,594 - So it's Wednesday... - Yeah. 332 00:26:14,711 --> 00:26:16,111 I can't believe that... 333 00:26:16,326 --> 00:26:17,361 Yeah in Study Hall. 334 00:26:17,817 --> 00:26:20,467 I'm sorry we can't help you out tonight. 335 00:26:21,834 --> 00:26:23,365 Yeah... 336 00:26:26,099 --> 00:26:27,427 Ernie... 337 00:26:28,683 --> 00:26:31,469 Sorry, we gotta bounce. 338 00:26:32,226 --> 00:26:34,217 The Lakers await us. 339 00:26:36,519 --> 00:26:38,060 You gonna be okay. 340 00:26:41,646 --> 00:26:43,886 Good luck, Vic. 341 00:26:52,608 --> 00:26:56,734 This Napa Pinot is elegantly smooth, 342 00:26:56,943 --> 00:26:59,776 full bodied with a hint of blueberry. 343 00:27:01,070 --> 00:27:04,068 And it has an exquisite nose. 344 00:27:09,906 --> 00:27:10,948 Cheers, darling. 345 00:27:11,573 --> 00:27:13,150 Cheers. 346 00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:25,573 I think it tastes a little stale. 347 00:27:25,786 --> 00:27:27,445 Stale? 348 00:27:29,121 --> 00:27:31,990 - I'll give you stale! Huh? - What? Nooo! Nooo! 349 00:27:32,205 --> 00:27:33,035 Huh? Huh? 350 00:27:33,247 --> 00:27:34,954 What? Huh? 351 00:27:35,165 --> 00:27:37,073 Seriously! Stop! 352 00:27:52,046 --> 00:27:53,088 Your turn. 353 00:27:53,713 --> 00:27:57,625 - I'm actually a little cold. - I'll keep you warm. 354 00:28:09,093 --> 00:28:10,135 What the hell? 355 00:28:13,011 --> 00:28:14,504 We'll pretend like no one's home. 356 00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:17,340 Oh, no, no, no, let me just go check it out really quick. 357 00:28:25,057 --> 00:28:26,219 Hi, Anya. 358 00:28:26,974 --> 00:28:29,808 Hey... What are you doing here? 359 00:28:30,017 --> 00:28:34,143 Well, call me a mama's boy, but I promised I would pick up Zack. 360 00:28:34,352 --> 00:28:37,600 He's not here. Brian's with my parents playing Bridge. 361 00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:41,353 Really? You sure you don't have him hiding in here somewhere? 362 00:28:43,147 --> 00:28:46,146 What the hell is hiccups doing here? 363 00:28:46,356 --> 00:28:49,024 Ah, I just swung by to pick up my kid brother. 364 00:28:49,232 --> 00:28:51,638 But apparently he's not here. 365 00:28:51,858 --> 00:28:53,814 Why in the world would your brother be here? 366 00:28:54,025 --> 00:28:55,187 He's friends with Brian. 367 00:28:55,401 --> 00:28:56,729 Exactly. 368 00:28:57,693 --> 00:29:00,479 Well, I hope I'm not disturbing anything? 369 00:29:01,403 --> 00:29:04,485 Not anything we can't get back to. 370 00:29:05,613 --> 00:29:08,695 - Well, I guess you better be going. - Peter, don't be rude! 371 00:29:08,906 --> 00:29:11,988 No, I'll, lll leave you two to do it... 372 00:29:13,074 --> 00:29:14,401 To it! 373 00:29:15,408 --> 00:29:16,985 See you later, Victor. 374 00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:18,943 Time for bed. Kindergarten starts early. 375 00:29:19,159 --> 00:29:21,446 What? Huh... 376 00:29:27,871 --> 00:29:32,328 Okay. Where were we? Oh, yeah... 377 00:29:42,376 --> 00:29:47,200 Yeah... Right there. Right there... Yeah! You feel that? Its pectorals. 378 00:29:56,714 --> 00:29:59,250 Feel those pectorals, baby? It's muscle. 379 00:30:00,590 --> 00:30:03,340 - What the hell is this? - I guess tonight isn't our night. 380 00:30:05,092 --> 00:30:07,000 No shit, Sherlock! 381 00:30:14,387 --> 00:30:15,086 Victor?! 382 00:30:15,304 --> 00:30:19,879 I'm really sorry to bother you, but I cant find my wallet. 383 00:30:20,097 --> 00:30:22,468 So I was trying to back track my night, and I thought, 384 00:30:22,681 --> 00:30:26,890 well, I couldn't possibly have left it here, could I? 385 00:30:27,100 --> 00:30:29,575 Unless you threw the thing through the door when we weren't looking! 386 00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:31,343 You, you didn't come in really. 387 00:30:32,268 --> 00:30:34,555 That's true 388 00:30:40,354 --> 00:30:42,330 ls there something going on that I don't know about? 389 00:30:42,355 --> 00:30:44,022 Do you drop by several times every night? 390 00:30:44,189 --> 00:30:46,513 - No. - Of course not. 391 00:30:47,107 --> 00:30:48,940 Are you trying to cock block me or something? 392 00:30:48,982 --> 00:30:51,187 Look, I, I hope you find your wallet. 393 00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:52,478 Thanks. 394 00:30:52,692 --> 00:30:54,564 Lets see, your little brother, your wallet, 395 00:30:54,776 --> 00:30:56,818 is there anything else you want us to check for? 396 00:30:59,069 --> 00:31:01,025 Nope. I think that's about it. 397 00:31:01,236 --> 00:31:02,694 Great! 398 00:31:06,197 --> 00:31:07,239 You alright? 399 00:31:07,322 --> 00:31:08,519 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 400 00:31:08,739 --> 00:31:13,113 I'm fine, I'm fine... Unless it wouldn't be too much trouble 401 00:31:13,741 --> 00:31:15,981 could I get a glass of milk? 402 00:31:18,159 --> 00:31:21,481 Whole milk. My personal favorite. 403 00:31:21,692 --> 00:31:26,219 Lots of energy. Tasty, yet 404 00:31:26,472 --> 00:31:28,422 whole. 405 00:31:43,430 --> 00:31:44,624 More? 406 00:31:44,843 --> 00:31:48,200 Ah, what the hell. The night's still young. Fill me up. 407 00:32:13,190 --> 00:32:15,967 Well... thanks for the drink. 408 00:32:16,182 --> 00:32:17,920 You sure you don't want more? 409 00:32:18,136 --> 00:32:20,583 They say to drink a full gallon when you're still growing. 410 00:32:20,796 --> 00:32:24,402 Naa, I shouldn't. Biking. 411 00:32:25,950 --> 00:32:28,211 I'll put this bad boy in the dishwasher, make myself useful. 412 00:32:28,236 --> 00:32:30,351 - No, that's not necessary, Victor. - I got it. 413 00:32:35,094 --> 00:32:38,746 - Where do the dishes go? - I'll take care of it! Useless! 414 00:32:39,375 --> 00:32:41,278 Guess I better be going! 415 00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:45,111 Thanks for stopping by, and if you need a bedtime story or get hungry... 416 00:32:45,900 --> 00:32:48,513 - Do it at home. Okay?! - Okay. 417 00:32:48,727 --> 00:32:51,008 - See you later. - Much, much later! 418 00:32:51,844 --> 00:32:53,711 Jesus, God! 419 00:32:55,045 --> 00:32:57,444 I don't believe that kid! 420 00:32:57,663 --> 00:33:01,102 I bet you in five minutes he'll want to borrow 3 eggs for a cup cake. 421 00:33:01,321 --> 00:33:03,023 Oh, he's not that bad. 422 00:33:03,233 --> 00:33:04,272 'What's up, ladies? 423 00:33:04,355 --> 00:33:07,464 "My name is Victor. I'm a mamas boy picking up my little brother!" 424 00:33:08,719 --> 00:33:11,580 I think he's sweet, in his own dorky way. 425 00:33:11,795 --> 00:33:14,868 Sweet? Oh. I'll show you sweet. 426 00:33:25,220 --> 00:33:27,419 I only play to win, Roger. 427 00:33:28,462 --> 00:33:32,316 All lm saying is if I open with two diamonds 428 00:33:32,535 --> 00:33:36,058 it isn't particularly intelligent of you to call "no trumps". 429 00:33:36,276 --> 00:33:39,101 I mean for God's sake, there weren't any more spades! 430 00:33:39,310 --> 00:33:40,682 It's called bluffing, my darling. 431 00:33:40,848 --> 00:33:43,109 You saw it for yourself, they had no idea what I was doing. 432 00:33:43,134 --> 00:33:44,173 Well, neither did I! 433 00:33:44,256 --> 00:33:46,407 They're probably porking like pigs right now. 434 00:33:46,625 --> 00:33:48,776 Watch your language, young man! 435 00:33:54,938 --> 00:33:58,047 You know, maybe we should ring the bell, just in case. 436 00:33:58,263 --> 00:34:00,959 We are the ones who live here, are we not? 437 00:34:01,173 --> 00:34:03,583 Yeah, remember when your mother and father walked in on us? 438 00:34:03,625 --> 00:34:05,906 We were on the kitchen counter. 439 00:34:07,490 --> 00:34:09,193 I'm gonna ring. I'm gonna ring. 440 00:34:13,185 --> 00:34:15,170 That's it, you cock blocking son of a bitch! 441 00:34:15,388 --> 00:34:18,165 No more Anya to stand between you and my fist! 442 00:34:18,380 --> 00:34:22,529 Why don't you fuck off so I can finally fuck her!!! 443 00:34:26,693 --> 00:34:29,237 Mr. And Mrs. Benton. Hi. 444 00:34:30,749 --> 00:34:33,211 We were just doing some homework. 445 00:34:33,425 --> 00:34:35,423 Drama. 446 00:34:38,903 --> 00:34:41,745 You wanna put your shirt on? 447 00:34:42,959 --> 00:34:44,005 How was Bridge? 448 00:34:44,172 --> 00:34:47,930 You're right. Peters facial expression is priceless! 449 00:34:49,022 --> 00:34:52,400 I know, the sunglass cam was definitely a good investment. 450 00:34:52,618 --> 00:34:55,044 Especially with the stuff of my dad cheating in Bridge too. 451 00:34:55,127 --> 00:34:57,839 Yeah, that will make us a nice blackmail payoff. 452 00:34:58,054 --> 00:35:00,136 So, what do you think well make on this film? 453 00:35:00,354 --> 00:35:02,399 A couple hundred million at least. 454 00:35:02,612 --> 00:35:05,455 That's what those French folks got from the animal video on YouPorn. 455 00:35:05,665 --> 00:35:08,245 Oh, the one with the porcupine and the giraffe screwing? 456 00:35:08,466 --> 00:35:12,308 Dude! And those are mammals. We're getting people! 457 00:35:12,522 --> 00:35:16,114 - People are mammals, stupid. - Whatever. 458 00:35:30,043 --> 00:35:32,291 Benton residence, talk to me, bitch. 459 00:35:33,263 --> 00:35:36,307 Hi. It's Victor. Is Anya there? 460 00:35:36,524 --> 00:35:38,736 It's Victor. He's actually buying it. 461 00:35:39,953 --> 00:35:42,284 Well, shes out taking a dump. 462 00:35:44,344 --> 00:35:46,008 Are you coming to her birthday party? 463 00:35:46,226 --> 00:35:48,307 I know she really wants to see you. 464 00:35:48,525 --> 00:35:51,450 Really? Yeah, I'd love to come. 465 00:35:51,662 --> 00:35:53,874 Do you know what kind of present she would like? 466 00:35:54,756 --> 00:35:57,056 The idiot wants to know what she wants for her birthday! 467 00:36:06,590 --> 00:36:09,848 Well Vic, if you really wanna make my sister happy, 468 00:36:10,060 --> 00:36:12,058 you'll buy her a tarantula. 469 00:36:12,276 --> 00:36:14,821 She's wanted one of those things since she was little. 470 00:36:18,005 --> 00:36:20,764 Atarantula? Really? 471 00:36:20,974 --> 00:36:22,353 Hell, yeah. 472 00:36:22,563 --> 00:36:25,365 She's always dreamt of having a wrestling match between her lizard, 473 00:36:25,532 --> 00:36:27,494 and one of them black, hairy beasts. 474 00:36:27,706 --> 00:36:31,416 I didn't even know she had a lizard. 475 00:36:31,637 --> 00:36:33,551 Alright. Thanks for the tip. 476 00:36:38,745 --> 00:36:40,493 Are you sure you guys are related? 477 00:36:40,711 --> 00:36:43,755 I know! How can anyone be that thick? 478 00:36:46,356 --> 00:36:50,744 It balances the color. That's what you gotta do, honey. 479 00:36:51,290 --> 00:36:52,335 Hey! 480 00:36:53,130 --> 00:36:54,414 Do you guys happen to know 481 00:36:54,635 --> 00:36:58,144 if tarantulas are like, really deadly poisonous? 482 00:36:58,357 --> 00:37:01,318 - Why, did you see one?! - No. No, I was just curious. 483 00:37:02,413 --> 00:37:05,172 They are one of the most dangerous of all spiders, Victor. 484 00:37:05,382 --> 00:37:07,629 - If you see one, do not touch it! - No. 485 00:37:08,978 --> 00:37:12,356 - What's in the bag, son? - Just some homework. 486 00:37:12,574 --> 00:37:13,406 Wow! 487 00:37:13,619 --> 00:37:16,033 - He's so cool. Let's keep him! - We can't keep him. 488 00:37:16,254 --> 00:37:19,298 Mom will go ballistic if she found out we had a tarantula in the house. 489 00:37:19,515 --> 00:37:22,274 Besides, it's a present for Anya. 490 00:37:24,784 --> 00:37:27,364 - Let's name him Hugo. - Don't piss him off. 491 00:37:27,586 --> 00:37:31,213 - Let's find a dog and feed it. - They don't eat dogs, you idiot! 492 00:37:31,433 --> 00:37:35,655 The big ones do. The Turners down the street, they own a Chihuahua. 493 00:37:35,865 --> 00:37:38,077 - Zack, where are you? - Mom! Mom! Get the door! 494 00:37:42,137 --> 00:37:43,339 Zack! 495 00:37:47,197 --> 00:37:49,213 Zachary James! 496 00:37:49,423 --> 00:37:50,454 What the hell? 497 00:37:51,608 --> 00:37:54,363 I guess he's stronger than we thought. And hungrier... 498 00:37:54,576 --> 00:37:57,577 Oh, no! No, no, no, no. We have to find him now! 499 00:37:58,410 --> 00:37:59,723 Where are you? 500 00:38:01,213 --> 00:38:02,243 Zach! 501 00:38:03,192 --> 00:38:04,422 Arrrhhhh. 502 00:38:05,541 --> 00:38:06,572 You're such a wimp. 503 00:38:06,737 --> 00:38:08,344 Whatever you're doing, young man, don't! 504 00:38:08,427 --> 00:38:09,529 Zach! 505 00:38:09,746 --> 00:38:11,927 Get up! Get up! Get up! 506 00:38:13,374 --> 00:38:14,979 - Oh, you're in here. - Hi, Mom. 507 00:38:15,188 --> 00:38:18,975 - How are you today? - Zachary, what did you do this time? 508 00:38:19,928 --> 00:38:24,172 Nothing at all, mom. I'm just... helping Victor with his homework. 509 00:38:24,380 --> 00:38:27,182 You know, World War Two and stuff. Great war. 510 00:38:28,544 --> 00:38:30,314 Is something wrong, Victor? 511 00:38:30,523 --> 00:38:31,788 You look a little worried. 512 00:38:32,007 --> 00:38:36,122 Ah, no, no, no, I just, have a stomach ache. 513 00:38:36,335 --> 00:38:38,222 Does it hurt bad? Do you want some yoghurt? 514 00:38:38,437 --> 00:38:41,158 - Oh, I'm alright. It'll pass. - We ate three packs of cream puffs. 515 00:38:41,241 --> 00:38:42,846 Well, no wonder! 516 00:38:43,054 --> 00:38:45,892 You have to eat something more substantial. 517 00:38:46,105 --> 00:38:49,435 That's what I kept telling Vic here, but he kept insisting. 518 00:38:49,650 --> 00:38:53,390 I love cream puffs. What time is it? 519 00:38:53,607 --> 00:38:57,265 Oh, my God, its already 5.30. 520 00:38:57,482 --> 00:39:01,140 I'm gonna start dinner shortly. You boys better be able to eat something. 521 00:39:01,357 --> 00:39:03,209 We will. 522 00:39:05,026 --> 00:39:10,255 And it was freezing cold in Stalingrad. 523 00:39:10,468 --> 00:39:12,895 The soldiers had bare feet 524 00:39:13,106 --> 00:39:16,272 as they walked... where...? 525 00:39:16,486 --> 00:39:18,667 That's question number 8. 526 00:39:19,661 --> 00:39:22,498 It'll make an awesome scene when he gives it to her. 527 00:39:22,711 --> 00:39:24,927 Word. Hopefully she'll punch him or something. 528 00:39:26,050 --> 00:39:27,234 Hey! That's mine! 529 00:39:27,452 --> 00:39:29,585 No one gets away with cheating in my class! 530 00:39:29,801 --> 00:39:31,863 You can collect it later at the principal's office. 531 00:39:31,986 --> 00:39:34,495 Out! Both of you! Auf wiedersehen! 532 00:39:34,707 --> 00:39:39,643 - Come on Zack, we're out. - Yeah, this place is dead anyway. 533 00:39:41,426 --> 00:39:43,278 Question number 9! 534 00:39:48,970 --> 00:39:50,001 Ah. 535 00:39:50,866 --> 00:39:52,226 Are you feeling alright, Victor? 536 00:39:53,134 --> 00:39:56,956 Yeah, Mom. I'm... just going to a birthday party. 537 00:39:57,256 --> 00:39:58,979 At a girl's house. 538 00:39:59,194 --> 00:40:00,917 At a girl's house? 539 00:40:01,131 --> 00:40:04,985 A girl named Anya. 540 00:40:06,542 --> 00:40:08,678 Oh, my, my, what did you get her? 541 00:40:08,892 --> 00:40:10,776 Uh. It, it, it's a, it's a book. 542 00:40:10,989 --> 00:40:15,176 - Oh, it's a big book, isn't it? - Yeah, she reads a bunch. 543 00:40:15,394 --> 00:40:18,245 Anya. Do you take classes together? 544 00:40:19,505 --> 00:40:22,476 No, uh, shes... she's a senior. 545 00:40:23,364 --> 00:40:25,368 I don't really like the girls my own age. 546 00:40:26,594 --> 00:40:29,565 Wow! That's amazing! 547 00:40:33,348 --> 00:40:34,684 Let me. 548 00:40:40,437 --> 00:40:43,206 You should invite her over for dinner, so dad and I could meet her. 549 00:40:43,415 --> 00:40:48,271 Uh, I don't think so. Were just friends, ya know... 550 00:40:49,246 --> 00:40:52,098 Is that why you're ironing your underpants? 551 00:40:54,574 --> 00:40:58,260 Sorry. So, what does this Anya look like? 552 00:40:58,475 --> 00:41:02,877 She's... she's got dark hair and, 553 00:41:03,089 --> 00:41:06,525 she's so... 554 00:41:07,997 --> 00:41:09,548 She needs to be seen. 555 00:41:11,940 --> 00:41:14,529 Well, there you go. 556 00:41:15,506 --> 00:41:16,591 The socks 557 00:41:17,645 --> 00:41:19,733 I'll let you do yourself. 558 00:41:19,953 --> 00:41:21,074 Who is getting married? 559 00:41:21,295 --> 00:41:25,566 He's going to a birthday party. For a girl 560 00:41:25,783 --> 00:41:27,202 whos a senior! 561 00:41:27,419 --> 00:41:29,173 So he's not gay, huh? 562 00:41:30,650 --> 00:41:32,951 - I, I got it. - Well, let me just get the other. 563 00:41:33,166 --> 00:41:36,435 No, I'm gonna leave them down. Mom! 564 00:41:56,238 --> 00:41:59,125 Please! Come on! 565 00:42:01,062 --> 00:42:02,816 Please, stop! 566 00:42:07,397 --> 00:42:09,066 So Victor, how does it feel 567 00:42:09,284 --> 00:42:11,927 visiting the girl you've had wet dreams about on her birthday? 568 00:42:13,269 --> 00:42:14,318 Are you nervous? 569 00:42:14,444 --> 00:42:17,129 Brian Henry! Go back in the living room. 570 00:42:17,338 --> 00:42:19,343 We're not buying anything today. 571 00:42:19,562 --> 00:42:23,368 Mom! This is Victor. Anya's new boy toy. 572 00:42:26,022 --> 00:42:27,489 Really? 573 00:42:27,700 --> 00:42:30,634 Hi, Mrs. Benton. Victor Knudsen. Very nice to meet you. 574 00:42:30,846 --> 00:42:33,613 I thought everyone was here. 575 00:42:33,824 --> 00:42:35,542 Victor? 576 00:42:37,558 --> 00:42:40,361 Happy Birthday. Thanks for inviting me. 577 00:42:41,291 --> 00:42:43,546 You're welcome. 578 00:42:45,947 --> 00:42:49,169 What a lovely present you brought for my daughter, Victor. 579 00:42:50,604 --> 00:42:52,405 Thanks. 580 00:42:52,617 --> 00:42:56,769 So, Anya, are you as excited as me to see what's inside that thing? 581 00:43:13,550 --> 00:43:15,434 What the hell is nerd boy doing here? 582 00:43:18,332 --> 00:43:20,849 Why doesn't she just kick him out? He clearly doesn't belong. 583 00:43:21,058 --> 00:43:24,411 She can't kick him out. He dressed up and brought a present and all. 584 00:43:26,050 --> 00:43:28,735 Well, come on already, Anya, open it. 585 00:43:33,475 --> 00:43:36,362 Slower, Sis. With feeling. 586 00:43:49,038 --> 00:43:52,975 Oh. Look at that, there's something moving in there. 587 00:43:53,191 --> 00:43:54,396 It's a... 588 00:44:00,364 --> 00:44:03,335 Oh, wow! It's an Eximius Colosus Aranea!! 589 00:44:05,063 --> 00:44:06,482 Oh, my God! 590 00:44:06,699 --> 00:44:09,484 Oh, Victor, that big, hairy fella must have cost you a fortune, huh? 591 00:44:09,509 --> 00:44:11,060 His name's Hugo. 592 00:44:11,271 --> 00:44:14,993 - Does it attack humans? - Only when it feels threatened. 593 00:44:19,283 --> 00:44:22,218 But, it was to keep your lizard company. 594 00:44:22,429 --> 00:44:24,267 I don't own any lizards, Victor. 595 00:44:24,485 --> 00:44:25,534 You don't? 596 00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:33,502 No, no, no, just keep breathing. It's okay, now he's just 597 00:44:33,714 --> 00:44:36,851 you know, just keep breathing. Take a deep breath. 598 00:44:37,070 --> 00:44:38,873 It's in the box, it's not gonna harm anyone. 599 00:44:39,041 --> 00:44:40,508 It's not funny. 600 00:44:40,971 --> 00:44:45,242 Let me get you a piece of cake to calm your nerves. 601 00:44:47,221 --> 00:44:48,640 Honey, it's okay. 602 00:44:50,074 --> 00:44:51,361 Thank you. 603 00:44:51,584 --> 00:44:53,504 Ooooohhh! 604 00:45:07,986 --> 00:45:09,870 Anya, I'm so sorry about all this. 605 00:45:10,083 --> 00:45:11,419 I'm sure you didn't intend 606 00:45:11,635 --> 00:45:14,689 on releasing a poisonous creature in my house on purpose. 607 00:45:16,208 --> 00:45:18,975 Thanks for hiding me in your bedroom. 608 00:45:19,186 --> 00:45:21,774 Your entire family probably wants to kill me, huh? 609 00:45:21,997 --> 00:45:25,385 For some reason my dad finds you really hilarious. 610 00:45:26,275 --> 00:45:28,077 He seems like a great guy. 611 00:45:29,338 --> 00:45:33,943 I thought it was very sweet of you to buy me such a lovely present. 612 00:45:34,162 --> 00:45:35,331 I'm glad you liked it. 613 00:45:35,546 --> 00:45:38,349 What on earth made you buy me a tarantula? 614 00:45:39,657 --> 00:45:41,281 Brian said you always wanted one! 615 00:45:42,701 --> 00:45:45,819 That little turd had something to do with this. 616 00:45:53,874 --> 00:45:55,830 You did that on purpose, didn't you? 617 00:45:56,709 --> 00:45:58,535 Not at all. 618 00:46:00,545 --> 00:46:04,457 - Never give up, huh? - I guess not. 619 00:46:07,465 --> 00:46:10,999 Well, I guess I better kiss you, then. 620 00:46:15,971 --> 00:46:18,840 Well, we still can't find Hugo. But the good news is, 621 00:46:19,056 --> 00:46:20,598 Aunt Lizzy didn't get bit after all. 622 00:46:20,807 --> 00:46:24,056 It was just her recent Botox that made her face go numb. 623 00:46:24,267 --> 00:46:26,176 I hope I didn't ruin your couch. 624 00:46:27,478 --> 00:46:29,101 Hum. 22 grand. 625 00:46:29,312 --> 00:46:31,683 22,000 dollars?! 626 00:46:31,897 --> 00:46:33,521 No, I'm just messing with you. Kid. 627 00:46:36,400 --> 00:46:37,680 You need a ride home? 628 00:46:37,901 --> 00:46:40,770 Yeah. Thanks. 629 00:46:44,696 --> 00:46:46,439 Sorry again I ruined your birthday. 630 00:46:59,914 --> 00:47:03,578 It's a, it's a really great motor. You can't wear the crankshaft out. 631 00:47:03,791 --> 00:47:06,459 The pistons are cast steel, and the brakes 632 00:47:06,668 --> 00:47:08,494 work every other Tuesday. 633 00:47:09,670 --> 00:47:13,287 Since I don't have no senior babe, I have to drill what I got. 634 00:47:14,506 --> 00:47:16,249 Even if it was just a mercy kiss, 635 00:47:16,466 --> 00:47:19,300 I think I'll see if she wants to go to a movie sometime. 636 00:47:19,509 --> 00:47:21,300 Woa, woa, woa, woa, woa. 637 00:47:21,510 --> 00:47:23,835 No, no. 638 00:47:24,053 --> 00:47:27,551 You can't take a girl you really like to the movies on a first date. 639 00:47:27,764 --> 00:47:31,345 You have to do something that will really impress her. 640 00:47:31,558 --> 00:47:34,048 Yeah. Something to get her panties wet. 641 00:47:35,811 --> 00:47:40,186 Imagine you and her alone together... 642 00:47:42,440 --> 00:47:44,396 Close those eyes. 643 00:47:44,608 --> 00:47:49,066 Somewhere romantic... somewhere that ll make her heart go 644 00:47:49,277 --> 00:47:53,818 Victor, Victor, Victor... 645 00:47:54,572 --> 00:47:56,729 Where would you be? 646 00:47:58,991 --> 00:48:01,528 I got it! I'll take her to Pyramid Lake and, 647 00:48:01,743 --> 00:48:03,569 and get some bananas, organic ones. 648 00:48:03,786 --> 00:48:06,406 Girls like that. And rent a row boat. 649 00:48:06,621 --> 00:48:08,079 Thanks boys, wish me luck! 650 00:48:11,332 --> 00:48:15,280 Bananas? I think we got a situation. 651 00:48:17,085 --> 00:48:19,161 I'm more worried about the row boat. 652 00:48:19,379 --> 00:48:21,619 He doesn't really have the arms for it, you know? 653 00:48:21,838 --> 00:48:24,079 - Truth. - Got the legs, though. 654 00:48:41,642 --> 00:48:43,432 Hey Victor. What's up? 655 00:48:45,768 --> 00:48:48,933 I uh... wanted to make it up to you. 656 00:48:49,895 --> 00:48:51,970 For the mess I made. 657 00:48:54,397 --> 00:48:56,435 Give me five minutes. 658 00:49:07,485 --> 00:49:12,820 So... where's this apology at? 659 00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:18,394 Thanks. 660 00:49:18,614 --> 00:49:23,687 I was also hoping you'd come with me somewhere? 661 00:49:23,907 --> 00:49:25,614 For lunch. 662 00:49:26,075 --> 00:49:28,778 Nowhere near poisonous creatures, I promise. 663 00:49:30,785 --> 00:49:33,986 - Okay. - Okay. 664 00:49:43,664 --> 00:49:46,118 Sorry, it's my dads. 665 00:49:46,332 --> 00:49:48,656 - No Lotus. - It has character. 666 00:49:50,417 --> 00:49:52,159 Anya, what the hell you doing, baby? 667 00:49:53,084 --> 00:49:54,661 Shit. 668 00:49:54,877 --> 00:49:58,290 Victor's taking me out to apologize for my birthday party. 669 00:49:58,503 --> 00:50:02,000 But, I was planning to take you to the Four Seasons today. 670 00:50:02,213 --> 00:50:04,168 I booked a room... ahhh, a table. 671 00:50:04,922 --> 00:50:05,964 Sorry. 672 00:50:06,131 --> 00:50:10,541 Anya, come on, its Victor, the hiccup Freshman, for Christ sake. 673 00:50:11,799 --> 00:50:14,751 Are you seriously choosing to go out with some 15 year old loser 674 00:50:14,967 --> 00:50:18,215 who's so not in your league, over moi? 675 00:50:18,427 --> 00:50:21,426 You can be such a jackass, you know that? 676 00:50:24,054 --> 00:50:26,211 - Let's go, Victor. - Yeah. 677 00:50:33,265 --> 00:50:36,798 If I hadn't just had a manicure you'd be dead meat, hiccup boy! 678 00:50:37,017 --> 00:50:40,466 Fine. I hope you two are very happy together, in your 679 00:50:40,685 --> 00:50:44,810 1915 get-out-and-push piece of shit wheels. 680 00:50:45,937 --> 00:50:47,892 Have fun at Dave and Buster's. 681 00:50:53,064 --> 00:50:56,894 - So, that went well. - Yeah, I guess that was that. 682 00:51:08,528 --> 00:51:10,235 I, I... 683 00:51:15,864 --> 00:51:17,902 Try it now. 684 00:51:23,867 --> 00:51:25,111 Wow! 685 00:51:34,746 --> 00:51:37,745 Um. The Queen Nefertiti Rose. 686 00:51:38,497 --> 00:51:41,633 Named after the Roman Queen. 687 00:51:44,115 --> 00:51:47,967 Your pink-white, and your white, and your white pink... 688 00:51:49,859 --> 00:51:53,162 - So, where are you taking me? - You'll see. 689 00:52:06,127 --> 00:52:10,813 - Hi, wed like to ah... - Mr. Victor Knudsen, I presume? 690 00:52:11,032 --> 00:52:14,132 - Yeah... - Everything is ready, sir. 691 00:52:14,344 --> 00:52:17,445 - Just like you requested. - Requested? 692 00:52:18,872 --> 00:52:24,142 Oh, Victor, it's absolutely amazing! How romantic! 693 00:52:25,958 --> 00:52:29,559 - Yeah, well... - I wanna row! 694 00:52:30,528 --> 00:52:33,580 I'm glad everything is to the young lady's liking. 695 00:52:38,536 --> 00:52:42,339 The rest is in your hands. 696 00:52:50,988 --> 00:52:55,340 Come on, let's follow em. Maybe we'll get to see some live porn. 697 00:52:55,558 --> 00:53:00,828 No man, he's on his own now. It's so romantic. 698 00:53:01,176 --> 00:53:04,527 Oh, it's so romantic, boo-boo. 699 00:53:04,740 --> 00:53:07,077 You know what's, what's romantic here? 700 00:53:07,297 --> 00:53:09,717 I like cheese fries. I want some cheese fries. 701 00:53:09,939 --> 00:53:11,071 Lets get some cheese fries. 702 00:53:11,113 --> 00:53:14,129 Really? Cheese fries are fat. 703 00:53:24,319 --> 00:53:27,252 My family and I used to come here when I was a kid. 704 00:53:28,260 --> 00:53:32,577 It's gorgeous. I never knew this place existed. 705 00:54:08,761 --> 00:54:11,862 I'm sorry for what Peter said earlier. 706 00:54:12,451 --> 00:54:15,718 It's okay. He's right. It's a piece of shit car. 707 00:54:16,560 --> 00:54:20,161 No, I mean; You're not a loser. 708 00:54:21,423 --> 00:54:23,843 And I'm not out of your league. 709 00:54:26,245 --> 00:54:27,293 You're not? 710 00:54:46,369 --> 00:54:48,670 I just wanted to make sure that's clear. 711 00:55:01,086 --> 00:55:02,803 Victor? 712 00:55:03,559 --> 00:55:05,979 Have you ever done it? 713 00:55:06,201 --> 00:55:07,488 Done what? 714 00:55:08,926 --> 00:55:11,978 You know... 'lt"? 715 00:55:13,538 --> 00:55:17,854 Oh, oh, it! Yeah, sure, of course... 716 00:55:18,066 --> 00:55:20,653 All the time... Who hasn't? 717 00:55:26,745 --> 00:55:27,949 No. 718 00:55:31,902 --> 00:55:35,586 Do you... maybe want to...? 719 00:55:38,736 --> 00:55:40,154 With me? 720 00:55:41,083 --> 00:55:42,585 Here? 721 00:55:42,802 --> 00:55:47,154 No, silly. My parents play cards on Wednesdays. 722 00:55:48,169 --> 00:55:49,970 Oh, I know. 723 00:55:50,181 --> 00:55:51,982 You do? 724 00:55:53,661 --> 00:55:55,712 You could come by around 8. 725 00:55:56,932 --> 00:55:59,817 Eight? I can do 8, yeah! 726 00:56:00,747 --> 00:56:05,099 And bring something with you. If you know what I mean. 727 00:56:07,455 --> 00:56:10,257 Right. Right. Something. 728 00:56:10,474 --> 00:56:12,357 Sure. 729 00:56:14,038 --> 00:56:16,839 I'm the king of the world!! 730 00:56:55,293 --> 00:56:58,727 Good day, young man, haven't seen you before. How may I help you? 731 00:57:07,075 --> 00:57:09,328 My Miniature Pony? 732 00:57:11,519 --> 00:57:15,323 Yeah, it's for my little br... sister! 733 00:57:15,753 --> 00:57:17,804 Anything else I can get for you? 734 00:57:18,017 --> 00:57:20,903 Yeah, I, I really need some cond 735 00:57:21,120 --> 00:57:23,039 some, some cond 736 00:57:23,594 --> 00:57:27,147 some condensed milk. 737 00:57:27,367 --> 00:57:32,519 Condensed milk? Alright. 738 00:57:36,321 --> 00:57:40,405 - Is that all? - No, no, I, I, I need some cond... 739 00:57:41,231 --> 00:57:44,071 - Some cond... - Cond...? 740 00:57:46,843 --> 00:57:50,176 Condoms... 741 00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:56,578 - I, I mean some rubb... - Rub what? 742 00:57:57,447 --> 00:58:02,435 Some ru... bbing alcohol. Rubbing alcohol. 743 00:58:03,183 --> 00:58:07,091 Hm hum. Yep, that, that's the stuff. 744 00:58:10,982 --> 00:58:13,904 And I really need some cond... 745 00:58:15,232 --> 00:58:19,890 Some co... Ca, Ca, Castillo's, Cas, Castello's. 746 00:58:20,101 --> 00:58:20,922 Those. 747 00:58:21,132 --> 00:58:22,317 How old are you? 748 00:58:22,535 --> 00:58:24,506 Oh, no, I wouldn't touch those things. 749 00:58:24,722 --> 00:58:27,937 - They're for my dad. - Ahh, someone's having a party... 750 00:58:35,615 --> 00:58:37,587 Yo, Victor. Whatcha doing? 751 00:58:42,878 --> 00:58:45,095 Didn't look like a Havana. 752 00:58:51,460 --> 00:58:53,397 You wanna make 5 bucks? 753 00:58:53,606 --> 00:58:56,282 Not really, but I wouldn't mind making 20. 754 00:58:58,805 --> 00:59:00,823 And what may I get for you today, son? 755 00:59:01,033 --> 00:59:03,051 I'd like to buy some jimmy hats. 756 00:59:04,293 --> 00:59:07,050 I'm sorry I'm not familiar with the name. What may they be? 757 00:59:07,264 --> 00:59:11,512 Dingers, johnnies, gloves. 758 00:59:11,720 --> 00:59:14,689 The thing you need when you're banging a chick, of course. 759 00:59:14,897 --> 00:59:15,929 Oh, my! 760 00:59:16,094 --> 00:59:19,639 I suppose you mean condoms, my young fellow? 761 00:59:19,849 --> 00:59:23,018 Duh, what are you deaf? Rubbers with colors. 762 00:59:23,232 --> 00:59:26,941 And you don't suppose you're a bit too young for that sort of thing? 763 00:59:27,152 --> 00:59:30,321 I don't think so mister, the fat ones getting hairy already. 764 00:59:32,063 --> 00:59:33,713 I'm sorry, are you feeling alright, maam? 765 00:59:33,920 --> 00:59:37,628 I just need to lean up against something. 766 00:59:37,839 --> 00:59:40,186 Or should I rather buy the ribbed ones? 767 00:59:40,398 --> 00:59:41,693 They're supposed to prolong the pleasure. 768 00:59:41,718 --> 00:59:45,544 Listen, kid. We only have normal kinds, no colors, knobs or flavors! 769 00:59:45,762 --> 00:59:49,176 Alright, I'll make do with the smooth ones. A carton of Trojans. 770 00:59:49,393 --> 00:59:51,682 A carton? Are you completely out of your mind, kid? 771 00:59:51,896 --> 00:59:53,011 Theres 200 in a carton!! 772 00:59:53,231 --> 00:59:56,815 Yeah, I'm spending the entire weekend with her, 773 00:59:57,028 --> 00:59:59,781 and she's a lush one so... 774 00:59:59,990 --> 01:00:01,699 Alrighty then, give me two. 775 01:00:01,909 --> 01:00:04,864 - Two cartons? - No, just two. 776 01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:06,954 I can always flip them over and reuse. 777 01:00:08,126 --> 01:00:11,247 - Four-fifty. - Keep the change. 778 01:00:13,800 --> 01:00:16,053 You wouldn't happen to have a dressing room out back, 779 01:00:16,220 --> 01:00:17,762 just so I can try them on for size? 780 01:00:17,972 --> 01:00:19,550 Get out! 781 01:00:23,479 --> 01:00:25,936 I can't believe my brother's actually gonna get some. 782 01:00:26,149 --> 01:00:27,977 It'll make great footage. 783 01:00:28,194 --> 01:00:31,813 It's gotta be possible to paint the rain coats with luminous paint. 784 01:00:32,032 --> 01:00:34,191 So we can see the action in details. 785 01:00:34,410 --> 01:00:38,195 Not necessary, my man, this baby's got night vision! 786 01:00:38,415 --> 01:00:43,411 Nice. Not sure how well the film will sell with a "happy ending" though. 787 01:00:43,631 --> 01:00:47,297 Yeah. Right now Victor's the only one who'll get one. 788 01:00:47,511 --> 01:00:50,797 - We need more drama. - Perhaps we can think of something. 789 01:00:51,599 --> 01:00:54,803 Would you mind sharing what you just said with the class? 790 01:00:55,020 --> 01:00:57,310 Yeah, sure thing Mrs. T. 791 01:00:57,524 --> 01:01:00,276 It was about my gang bang with three playmates last weekend... 792 01:01:00,486 --> 01:01:03,322 Alright! That's quite enough sharing, Zack! 793 01:01:03,532 --> 01:01:06,450 Hey, you wanted to know. I also showed the chicks my trapeze stunt... 794 01:01:06,661 --> 01:01:09,152 Principal's office! Both out you! Now! 795 01:01:09,372 --> 01:01:13,371 Yeah, we gotta bounce anyway. Our bitches are waiting. 796 01:01:14,921 --> 01:01:16,998 We out. 797 01:01:31,026 --> 01:01:34,063 Hello baby!! Your man is back! 798 01:01:36,908 --> 01:01:38,487 What did you smoke today? 799 01:01:38,702 --> 01:01:41,823 Oh, good evening Mr. Benton, Sir. 800 01:01:42,040 --> 01:01:44,366 Call me Roger, Spider man. 801 01:01:45,503 --> 01:01:48,540 Did you bring us any other dangerous animals this time? 802 01:01:48,757 --> 01:01:50,335 Not tonight, Mr. Benton. 803 01:01:50,551 --> 01:01:51,927 Oooh! 804 01:01:52,137 --> 01:01:52,967 Roger. 805 01:01:53,180 --> 01:01:57,927 Too bad. Still no Hugo. 806 01:01:59,980 --> 01:02:02,733 Come on, I'll take you up to Any as room. 807 01:02:03,652 --> 01:02:06,226 You two are working on a science project for school tonight? 808 01:02:06,447 --> 01:02:09,817 Yeah. Yeah. For... science class. 809 01:02:10,035 --> 01:02:11,993 Okay. 810 01:02:28,184 --> 01:02:29,513 Hi! 811 01:02:30,186 --> 01:02:32,096 Hey. 812 01:02:41,618 --> 01:02:43,776 I'm almost done. 813 01:03:06,726 --> 01:03:09,217 And... I'm done. 814 01:03:12,982 --> 01:03:18,189 So, aren't your parents gonna play cards tonight? 815 01:03:18,404 --> 01:03:19,814 I don't think so. 816 01:03:22,449 --> 01:03:25,984 They actually asked if we could watch Brian tonight. 817 01:03:26,203 --> 01:03:27,661 Hope that's okay with you. 818 01:03:29,498 --> 01:03:32,701 Sure. Sure, yeah, that's, that's fine. 819 01:03:34,419 --> 01:03:37,373 Gotcha! They leave in 10 minutes! 820 01:03:39,132 --> 01:03:41,006 That is not even funny. 821 01:03:41,217 --> 01:03:42,877 No... Okay... 822 01:03:44,846 --> 01:03:46,340 Stop! 823 01:03:47,724 --> 01:03:49,099 Hey, there. 824 01:03:49,308 --> 01:03:50,993 Just wanted to let you two know that we're leaving. 825 01:03:51,018 --> 01:03:52,975 - Okay, see you. - Bye. 826 01:03:53,187 --> 01:03:57,019 Get some work done. We'll be back shortly. 827 01:03:58,275 --> 01:04:00,398 Have fun! Live free. 828 01:04:07,743 --> 01:04:08,786 So...? 829 01:04:10,287 --> 01:04:11,450 So... 830 01:04:20,422 --> 01:04:23,588 You want a glass of milk? To break the ice? 831 01:04:26,678 --> 01:04:28,255 Only if it's whole milk. 832 01:05:00,877 --> 01:05:03,878 Now that we've got that taken care of 833 01:05:04,548 --> 01:05:06,090 do you wanna go back to my room? 834 01:05:17,227 --> 01:05:19,349 Can you turn off the lights? 835 01:06:35,719 --> 01:06:38,636 Maybe it's a little too dark. 836 01:06:38,847 --> 01:06:41,089 No, it isn't, it's okay. 837 01:06:52,444 --> 01:06:54,270 Victor, what are you doing? 838 01:06:55,154 --> 01:06:58,819 - I'm touching you. - No, no, no, you're not! 839 01:07:05,456 --> 01:07:10,367 - I thought it felt a little funny. - Thanks for the compliment. 840 01:07:16,675 --> 01:07:20,459 Are you ready to get completely naked? 841 01:07:53,711 --> 01:07:57,661 Victor, did you... bring something? 842 01:07:58,049 --> 01:07:59,424 Of course. 843 01:08:04,263 --> 01:08:05,543 One second. 844 01:08:08,642 --> 01:08:10,053 Got it. 845 01:08:15,315 --> 01:08:16,358 One second. 846 01:08:20,904 --> 01:08:24,403 I can't get this piece of crap open. Come... 847 01:08:28,661 --> 01:08:30,321 Alright. 848 01:08:43,676 --> 01:08:45,170 Is it on? 849 01:08:45,678 --> 01:08:49,296 - Yeah, on my fingers. - Relax. 850 01:08:49,515 --> 01:08:51,804 It's my first time too, remember? 851 01:08:52,017 --> 01:08:55,682 Yeah... 852 01:08:56,063 --> 01:08:59,646 It was a lot easier putting it on Ernie's fingers in sex-ED. 853 01:09:00,526 --> 01:09:02,684 How in the... hell...? 854 01:09:07,282 --> 01:09:08,657 I have another one! 855 01:09:08,867 --> 01:09:09,910 Okay. 856 01:09:20,795 --> 01:09:23,630 Aren't we lucky, it has a manual. 857 01:09:24,549 --> 01:09:29,839 'Roll slowly over erect penis'. 858 01:09:30,805 --> 01:09:32,548 How poetic. 859 01:09:32,890 --> 01:09:34,265 Let me try. 860 01:09:41,148 --> 01:09:45,276 "Erect penis'. That certainly isn't a problem." 861 01:09:47,279 --> 01:09:50,315 Abracadabra... 862 01:09:52,409 --> 01:09:54,068 Voila! 863 01:10:01,994 --> 01:10:04,565 - My parents! Already? - What? 864 01:10:10,578 --> 01:10:11,858 Victor, that's my dress! 865 01:10:18,746 --> 01:10:21,365 The bed, the bed. Help me, help me make the bed. 866 01:10:22,830 --> 01:10:26,741 I just don't think it's necessary! She is 18 now, you know. 867 01:10:28,706 --> 01:10:31,195 Hey kids. We're back. 868 01:10:31,914 --> 01:10:32,956 - Hello. - Hey. 869 01:10:33,248 --> 01:10:35,737 So, have you two been, uh, behaving yourselves? 870 01:10:35,957 --> 01:10:37,699 What do you think, dad? 871 01:10:37,915 --> 01:10:40,914 Well, your father seems to believe that you are a responsible adult. 872 01:10:42,333 --> 01:10:44,786 Victor, my man, did you hit all the angles? 873 01:10:46,041 --> 01:10:47,949 Okay, come on, Brian, time for bed. 874 01:10:48,167 --> 01:10:54,164 Hey. That's a nice science project there, guys. What is it? 875 01:10:55,251 --> 01:11:00,324 - It's a... - Lexington Hussil. 876 01:11:00,543 --> 01:11:02,451 Hussil. A Lexington Hussil. 877 01:11:03,169 --> 01:11:05,207 Oh, I see. 878 01:11:05,544 --> 01:11:09,455 Victor, could I have a little chat with you for a minute? 879 01:11:09,670 --> 01:11:10,748 In the kitchen. 880 01:11:11,503 --> 01:11:13,708 For Christ sakes, dad, does it have to be right now? 881 01:11:15,254 --> 01:11:18,702 It's, it's fine. It's, it's fine. 882 01:11:19,171 --> 01:11:20,333 Victor! 883 01:11:20,546 --> 01:11:23,959 - Where did the other one go? - I didn't have a chance to take it off! 884 01:11:28,089 --> 01:11:29,131 Cheers. 885 01:11:31,339 --> 01:11:35,630 One has to be careful not to sit down on Hugo. 886 01:11:36,298 --> 01:11:39,250 Still haven't found that little bugger. 887 01:11:42,549 --> 01:11:46,674 You know, Victor, its become clear to me that 888 01:11:46,883 --> 01:11:51,458 my daughter likes you very much and you like her, and... 889 01:11:51,884 --> 01:11:55,925 Constance and I think that you're just ah, well, you know... 890 01:11:57,426 --> 01:12:00,508 In fact, you remind me very much of myself when I was your age. 891 01:12:00,718 --> 01:12:03,005 Always going after the hot, older gal. 892 01:12:04,302 --> 01:12:09,256 So, I hope that the two of you, you know, could be together for... 893 01:12:09,470 --> 01:12:13,511 - At least some time. - So do I, sir. 894 01:12:14,012 --> 01:12:17,343 Yeah. So, I understand that the two of you wanna have sex with each other. 895 01:12:21,221 --> 01:12:22,798 No. Hey, relax, 896 01:12:23,013 --> 01:12:25,514 it's, you know it's completely natural. Completely natural. 897 01:12:25,597 --> 01:12:30,136 At your ages, you know. Even at my age, I like to have it occasionally. 898 01:12:30,348 --> 01:12:32,671 Mostly with my wife. 899 01:12:35,723 --> 01:12:38,675 I'm in the cut-throat world of advertising, alright? 900 01:12:38,890 --> 01:12:40,265 It's kill or be killed. 901 01:12:40,474 --> 01:12:43,887 We're working on a big campaign now, spending millions of dollars in fact, 902 01:12:44,099 --> 01:12:47,880 to get young people to understand that protection can be 'hip... 903 01:12:48,100 --> 01:12:50,849 And that its important for them to have a condom on them 904 01:12:51,059 --> 01:12:53,215 every time they leave their home. 905 01:12:53,434 --> 01:12:55,923 Well, I don't mean on them, of course... 906 01:12:56,143 --> 01:12:58,098 - No. - But with them. 907 01:12:58,935 --> 01:13:00,842 You know, in their wallet, or their pocket, 908 01:13:01,060 --> 01:13:05,386 it doesn't matter where, as long as they have the darn thing. 909 01:13:08,603 --> 01:13:10,724 So, can I ask you a personal question? 910 01:13:14,020 --> 01:13:15,679 Of course. Yeah. 911 01:13:15,896 --> 01:13:19,344 How often do you have a rubber on you? 912 01:13:22,230 --> 01:13:26,224 Well I, I, I just started having one 913 01:13:26,439 --> 01:13:28,725 on me, recently. 914 01:13:29,814 --> 01:13:33,015 You know, everyone's so liberated now that its important to have one 915 01:13:33,231 --> 01:13:35,103 on you, with you. 916 01:13:36,190 --> 01:13:39,272 Oh, I'm glad to hear that, Victor. You know, you're adults now, 917 01:13:39,482 --> 01:13:41,805 and that comes with some responsibilities. 918 01:13:42,024 --> 01:13:43,221 Of course. 919 01:13:44,191 --> 01:13:47,143 I'm glad you have such a good head for these things. 920 01:13:51,400 --> 01:13:55,726 - Want another drink for the road? - Yes, sir. 921 01:14:15,070 --> 01:14:18,104 Well, I'm glad we had this talk son. 922 01:14:22,030 --> 01:14:23,772 Me too, sir. 923 01:14:25,363 --> 01:14:26,405 Ow, alright. 924 01:14:27,989 --> 01:14:30,276 - That's cool. - Yeah. 925 01:14:33,990 --> 01:14:37,403 - Sorry about my dad. - It's all good. 926 01:14:38,199 --> 01:14:40,818 Your dad and I understand each other. 927 01:14:42,908 --> 01:14:46,984 So, do you wanna do something after school tomorrow? 928 01:14:48,033 --> 01:14:50,071 I actually have to hang out with Marisa. 929 01:14:50,992 --> 01:14:53,113 Oh. Alright. 930 01:14:53,326 --> 01:14:56,526 - You should come. - With Marissa?! 931 01:14:56,743 --> 01:15:00,275 You'll grow on her. Like a cactus. 932 01:15:03,369 --> 01:15:04,566 Good night, Victor. 933 01:15:04,786 --> 01:15:07,156 Sweet dreams... 934 01:15:23,622 --> 01:15:26,655 - What up? - I think I have an idea for our ending. 935 01:15:26,872 --> 01:15:28,034 Nice.. 936 01:15:34,831 --> 01:15:37,367 How the hell does he forget to take it off? 937 01:15:37,582 --> 01:15:39,656 I don't know, we both completely panicked. 938 01:15:39,874 --> 01:15:43,370 You'll never get your cherry popped if you keep hanging with that kid! 939 01:15:43,583 --> 01:15:47,577 I don't know about that. It was pretty damn close. 940 01:15:47,792 --> 01:15:49,617 Besides I really like him. 941 01:15:49,834 --> 01:15:53,116 I mean he's, he's sweet, and sincere, and... 942 01:15:53,334 --> 01:15:54,711 Victor! 943 01:15:54,921 --> 01:15:59,138 Baby, Oh, I missed you so much. Why haven't you called me back? 944 01:15:59,348 --> 01:16:00,809 Are you still dating that old hag? 945 01:16:06,323 --> 01:16:08,152 Victor, what the hell are you doing?! 946 01:16:09,455 --> 01:16:12,330 I... I don't, I don't know! Who are you? 947 01:16:12,546 --> 01:16:15,966 Good one. I'll see you tomorrow, stud. 948 01:16:17,390 --> 01:16:19,682 Anya, I don't know what's going on... 949 01:16:19,896 --> 01:16:21,817 Well, I do! What, you just wanted to show off 950 01:16:22,026 --> 01:16:24,257 in front of your stupid Freshmen friends, didn't you? 951 01:16:24,282 --> 01:16:27,287 - No, I, I would never... - Was I some sort of bet or something? 952 01:16:27,497 --> 01:16:27,995 Not at all! 953 01:16:28,207 --> 01:16:30,981 Since you didn't get any last night, you're done with me, is that it? 954 01:16:31,006 --> 01:16:33,880 - Would you listen to me? - Don't touch me! 955 01:16:37,563 --> 01:16:38,228 Anya! 956 01:16:38,440 --> 01:16:41,314 - Leave me alone! - You, bastard! 957 01:16:47,795 --> 01:16:50,503 But... I love you. 958 01:17:01,034 --> 01:17:04,490 - Oh, that looks great! - Well, they travel, you know. 959 01:17:04,710 --> 01:17:07,668 Look. He's a little fat, but you know, for what this has 960 01:17:09,638 --> 01:17:11,015 Victor, are you alright? 961 01:17:11,225 --> 01:17:14,895 - You look terrible. - Honey, what's wrong? 962 01:17:15,109 --> 01:17:19,029 - Oh, is it Anya? - Has she fallen for someone else? 963 01:17:19,244 --> 01:17:20,990 Christian!! 964 01:17:22,836 --> 01:17:26,423 It doesn't matter. Its no use. 965 01:17:34,196 --> 01:17:37,486 - Why are you so dumb? - Me? 966 01:17:38,205 --> 01:17:45,012 - No. Men! - Oh, men. Yeah, I know, honey. 967 01:17:45,221 --> 01:17:49,640 I guess we just sometimes do the wrong thing, Anya. 968 01:17:50,567 --> 01:17:53,775 I thought, I thought he loved me, Dad. 969 01:17:53,992 --> 01:17:58,042 Oh, baby, maybe he does, but he's young. 970 01:17:58,419 --> 01:18:01,923 He may not know how to express it, that's all. 971 01:18:03,097 --> 01:18:05,770 We all make mistakes, sweetheart. 972 01:18:08,192 --> 01:18:12,065 Why did your mother have to go to ballet tonight of all nights? 973 01:18:12,452 --> 01:18:15,991 Oh, baby, don't. Come on, come on, come on. 974 01:18:21,849 --> 01:18:25,804 I put extra marshmallows in it, so you could drown your sorrows. 975 01:18:27,571 --> 01:18:31,621 I guess there might be a chance I'd get lucky enough to choke and die. 976 01:18:32,415 --> 01:18:34,957 Now tell me what happened? 977 01:18:36,174 --> 01:18:40,676 Anya and I are done and my life is totally over. 978 01:18:40,935 --> 01:18:44,273 Nonsense. Of course your life isn't over. 979 01:18:44,485 --> 01:18:47,526 It is! Nothing else matters in this world. 980 01:18:47,743 --> 01:18:51,247 And she won't even listen to me. 981 01:18:52,880 --> 01:18:54,674 You just need to rest and you'll see. 982 01:18:54,885 --> 01:18:58,804 The world will look a lot brighter in the morning, I promise. 983 01:19:20,319 --> 01:19:22,231 Rise and shine, playboy. 984 01:19:22,449 --> 01:19:24,611 We got something you're gonna love. 985 01:19:24,830 --> 01:19:25,874 Go away! 986 01:19:26,083 --> 01:19:30,169 I know it isn't blue ray, but still, I think you wanna see this. 987 01:19:30,385 --> 01:19:34,435 We shot a masterpiece, a film about you and Anya. 988 01:19:34,645 --> 01:19:36,791 Why don't we show you a clip, so you can see for yourself. 989 01:19:36,816 --> 01:19:39,358 If you can afford it, of course. 990 01:19:43,541 --> 01:19:46,462 - I'll fast forward a bit. - Shouldn't we call his bank first? 991 01:19:49,262 --> 01:19:52,267 Nice work bro, I personally never thought you had it in you. 992 01:19:52,478 --> 01:19:54,022 You little bastards! 993 01:19:54,232 --> 01:19:56,477 Hold your horses and watch this... 994 01:19:56,696 --> 01:19:57,741 Open it. 995 01:20:00,664 --> 01:20:02,041 Oooooh! 996 01:20:03,253 --> 01:20:05,962 You think that was bad? Watch this! 997 01:20:08,641 --> 01:20:12,514 - Okay, but why would I do it? - Lisa, you're my favorite cousin. 998 01:20:12,734 --> 01:20:15,138 And.. I'll pay you 100 dollars. 999 01:20:15,357 --> 01:20:19,763 And a night out on the town with my favorite cousin? 1000 01:20:21,520 --> 01:20:23,509 I can't believe this! 1001 01:20:23,726 --> 01:20:26,343 Wait. How did Peter even know where we would be yesterday? 1002 01:20:28,931 --> 01:20:32,093 - Why didn't you tell me right away? - We are businessmen after all. 1003 01:20:32,304 --> 01:20:34,921 And we had to finish the cut first. 1004 01:20:35,135 --> 01:20:37,966 A true artist never shows his work until it is finished. 1005 01:20:38,175 --> 01:20:40,045 So bro, what will you pay for it? 1006 01:20:40,257 --> 01:20:45,455 We gotta start remembering to get our blackmail money up front! 1007 01:20:46,169 --> 01:20:49,331 Dude, all I got from him was a text saying his life was finished. 1008 01:20:49,542 --> 01:20:50,791 And he spelled finished wrong. 1009 01:20:50,833 --> 01:20:53,118 Ernie, buddy, I need to borrow your Vespa! 1010 01:20:53,331 --> 01:20:55,138 - What's going on, Vic, you ok? - There's no time to explain. 1011 01:20:55,163 --> 01:20:56,820 It's a life or death situation! Please!! 1012 01:20:57,037 --> 01:20:59,026 Well, alright, alright. Take a chill pill. 1013 01:20:59,244 --> 01:21:01,446 So look, the ah, the blinkers are here and, 1014 01:21:01,659 --> 01:21:04,027 this is a visor for your face, gas. 1015 01:21:04,240 --> 01:21:06,655 - Vic, most importantly, the brake. - Okay, yeah, whatever. 1016 01:21:06,863 --> 01:21:08,485 But how do I start this damn thing? 1017 01:21:08,696 --> 01:21:10,919 Perhaps you're better off having your dad mail you in, 1018 01:21:10,944 --> 01:21:12,980 that way you'll get there a little faster. 1019 01:21:13,192 --> 01:21:16,970 - Ernie, start it up!! - Damn! Someone's got their period! 1020 01:21:19,147 --> 01:21:20,852 Do it. 1021 01:21:24,060 --> 01:21:26,976 Hey, Vic, be careful, the brakes aren't what they used to be! 1022 01:21:36,400 --> 01:21:41,143 Oh! Damn! 1023 01:21:44,529 --> 01:21:46,106 Ahhh! 1024 01:21:53,909 --> 01:21:57,158 On the third day of high school I, 1025 01:21:57,369 --> 01:22:00,736 Victor Knudsen, was hit by an epidemic. 1026 01:22:00,954 --> 01:22:03,870 And were not talking chicken pox or the flu. 1027 01:22:04,081 --> 01:22:06,618 Nope, we're talking a case of total, 1028 01:22:06,832 --> 01:22:09,453 incurable "Anya-it is". 1029 01:22:10,293 --> 01:22:14,419 And I Victor Knudsen, didn't live. 1030 01:22:14,712 --> 01:22:18,293 Goodbye Anya, my love. 1031 01:22:32,721 --> 01:22:34,713 Anya? 1032 01:22:36,806 --> 01:22:38,300 Is it really you? 1033 01:22:39,183 --> 01:22:41,554 Hey, you. 1034 01:22:42,351 --> 01:22:44,883 I'm sorry I doubted you. 1035 01:22:45,097 --> 01:22:48,374 I was just so hurt when I saw that girl kissing you. 1036 01:22:48,716 --> 01:22:51,283 But, how did you know? 1037 01:22:51,504 --> 01:22:53,159 I saw the film. 1038 01:22:53,916 --> 01:22:55,194 You did? 1039 01:22:55,414 --> 01:22:58,112 Zack and Brian had an extra copy. 1040 01:22:58,326 --> 01:23:01,024 Actually, they have quite a few copies. 1041 01:23:02,445 --> 01:23:04,192 We may have to make it worth their while, 1042 01:23:04,359 --> 01:23:06,145 so we don't end up on YouTube... 1043 01:23:07,562 --> 01:23:11,052 At least some of the footage was used for something good. 1044 01:23:22,622 --> 01:23:23,947 Oh, my God! 1045 01:23:25,701 --> 01:23:29,984 This is gonna be good! 1046 01:23:34,812 --> 01:23:36,929 What the fuck...?! 1047 01:23:43,714 --> 01:23:45,749 - Pervert Peter! - Pervert! 1048 01:23:45,961 --> 01:23:49,529 But, she was only my third cousin!! 1049 01:23:50,488 --> 01:23:54,020 Bye! Bye, Peter, we'll miss you. 1050 01:23:56,395 --> 01:23:58,247 I brought you a cactus. 1051 01:24:01,569 --> 01:24:04,500 Oh! Thanks. 1052 01:24:06,830 --> 01:24:10,276 Anya, if I make it 1053 01:24:10,883 --> 01:24:14,108 do you think I could come over again? 1054 01:24:14,332 --> 01:24:15,705 On a Wednesday? 1055 01:24:15,927 --> 01:24:19,753 Seriously. I'm pretty sure you're gonna make it. 1056 01:24:19,980 --> 01:24:22,697 And to hell with Wednesdays. My parents are gone this weekend, 1057 01:24:22,783 --> 01:24:25,443 so well have the entire house to ourselves. 1058 01:24:26,319 --> 01:24:29,973 But, what would we do all weekend long? 1059 01:24:31,234 --> 01:24:33,429 But, what about my leg? 1060 01:24:35,158 --> 01:24:38,861 Victor, I'm pretty sure you don't really need your leg to do it. 1061 01:24:42,444 --> 01:24:44,381 You really never give up, do you? 1062 01:25:20,603 --> 01:25:24,134 Oh, Victor will be so sorry he didn't pay us for that footage. 1063 01:25:24,354 --> 01:25:27,714 And my sister found the stash of DVDs and destroyed them all. 1064 01:25:27,933 --> 01:25:30,556 Plus all the hidden cameras in her room. 1065 01:25:33,322 --> 01:25:35,211 What's that flashing red light? 1066 01:25:35,435 --> 01:25:37,548 Don't tell me you didn't charge the battery again! 1067 01:25:37,634 --> 01:25:39,571 - It was your turn! - Shiiiit! 1068 01:25:39,790 --> 01:25:42,721 - Gimme a break! - No, no, no, no, no! Damn