1 00:00:08,060 --> 00:00:10,580 How dark seems the night, 2 00:00:10,780 --> 00:00:13,580 when we comprehend the dangers therein. 3 00:00:13,780 --> 00:00:15,260 More fear! 4 00:00:15,460 --> 00:00:18,420 - And how small and alone is man, 5 00:00:18,620 --> 00:00:22,380 when at the mercy of a ravenous beast! 6 00:00:22,580 --> 00:00:27,700 Will this great and terrible bear tear apart... 7 00:00:27,900 --> 00:00:29,700 Well, keep going! 8 00:00:29,900 --> 00:00:34,140 - Tear apart my very soul... Honestly? 9 00:00:34,340 --> 00:00:36,660 - Look, is this the best we can do, 10 00:00:36,860 --> 00:00:39,060 great and terrible bear-wise? 11 00:00:39,260 --> 00:00:41,100 On our budget, yes. 12 00:00:41,300 --> 00:00:42,820 - She's trying to make me wear a dress. 13 00:00:42,900 --> 00:00:45,900 - It's a to... It's a toga. - You'll look heroic, darling. 14 00:00:46,100 --> 00:00:48,100 - Look, just take your position behind the boulder. 15 00:00:48,220 --> 00:00:49,300 What if I'm on the boulder? 16 00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:51,020 This is my scene. 17 00:00:51,220 --> 00:00:53,380 It won't be a soliloquy with him 18 00:00:53,580 --> 00:00:56,060 - preening himself on a rock. - "Preening"? 19 00:00:56,260 --> 00:00:59,620 - Just stand behind the boulder if you please. 20 00:00:59,820 --> 00:01:01,520 Right, from the top! 21 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:06,020 - How dark seems the night... 22 00:01:06,220 --> 00:01:08,260 - Sorry. Um, just need a minute 23 00:01:08,460 --> 00:01:10,180 to set up the great and terrible bear again. 24 00:01:10,260 --> 00:01:12,700 Refreshments incoming! 25 00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:14,460 Oh, don't bother, Derek. 26 00:01:14,660 --> 00:01:17,380 Apparently it's time for another break. 27 00:01:17,580 --> 00:01:19,180 Tea drinking, 28 00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:21,740 about the only thing you lot do with any conviction. 29 00:01:21,940 --> 00:01:23,500 - Just popping out for more yellow. 30 00:01:23,700 --> 00:01:26,660 Thought the back cloth needed a jolly sun in the sky. 31 00:01:26,860 --> 00:01:30,340 - "The Cursed Arrow" is a tragedy, Miss Thimble. 32 00:01:30,540 --> 00:01:35,100 - But you said "a child sky over desolate heath." 33 00:01:35,300 --> 00:01:39,380 - A wild sky, Dottie, and the playwright said it. 34 00:01:39,580 --> 00:01:42,220 - Well, I suppose that makes sense. 35 00:01:42,420 --> 00:01:45,100 - One wild sky coming up. - Sir. 36 00:01:45,300 --> 00:01:47,460 - I brought it straight over, sir. - Aha! 37 00:01:47,660 --> 00:01:52,580 Well, the regional arts fund are offering a very generous grant 38 00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:55,480 for "most promising cultural endeavour." 39 00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:58,636 - I don't quite follow, sir. Is this a police... 40 00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:00,020 - What? - Is it a police matter? 41 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:01,700 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 42 00:02:01,900 --> 00:02:04,960 And the grant committee... 43 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:10,380 The grant committee will be 44 00:02:10,580 --> 00:02:13,260 coming to our first performance. 45 00:02:13,460 --> 00:02:14,980 Ooh! 46 00:02:15,180 --> 00:02:21,060 Yes, our beg-borrow-and-steal years will soon be over! 47 00:02:21,260 --> 00:02:23,420 Stay and give us your critique on act one. 48 00:02:23,620 --> 00:02:25,540 - No, sir, I can't. I'm a bit busy at the moment. 49 00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:27,100 Right. 50 00:02:27,300 --> 00:02:31,140 Pressure's on, company... Deliver a cracking performance 51 00:02:31,340 --> 00:02:36,460 and we'll take the sad out of G-SADS once and for all! 52 00:03:09,540 --> 00:03:13,420 - Tis true I neglect my manly duties 53 00:03:13,620 --> 00:03:16,620 and allow my womenfolk to pine, 54 00:03:16,820 --> 00:03:20,100 but can any mortal resist 55 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:24,060 the lure of the ultimate prize? 56 00:03:24,260 --> 00:03:26,020 More pathos, less panto. 57 00:03:26,220 --> 00:03:28,840 And where are the lights? 58 00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:34,140 This is a serious drama, not burlesque! 59 00:03:35,700 --> 00:03:38,100 Or a Nazi interrogation. 60 00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:39,540 I'm coming up. 61 00:03:39,740 --> 00:03:41,760 - We're coming through. Come on, chaps! 62 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:44,700 - Convent cast-offs! 63 00:03:44,900 --> 00:03:46,580 Should get a few togas out of this lot. 64 00:03:46,780 --> 00:03:48,620 - Perfect. - Wish I could help more, but... 65 00:03:48,820 --> 00:03:50,540 - Oh, you're on. - Oh. 66 00:03:50,740 --> 00:03:52,636 - It's basically a semi-circle with a flat bit at the bottom, 67 00:03:52,660 --> 00:03:53,860 one size fits all. 68 00:03:54,060 --> 00:03:56,620 You are a godsend, Sister. 69 00:03:56,820 --> 00:03:59,620 Oh! Godsend. 70 00:03:59,820 --> 00:04:03,540 - Ambrose Chance must be spinning in his grave. 71 00:04:03,740 --> 00:04:06,420 - Ah, yes, the esteemed playwright. 72 00:04:06,620 --> 00:04:08,820 Great Slaughter's most famous son. 73 00:04:09,020 --> 00:04:10,580 Some might say second most famous, 74 00:04:10,780 --> 00:04:13,820 after Monty the albino shire horse, but let's not dwell. 75 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:16,380 I hope this will pass muster. 76 00:04:21,380 --> 00:04:23,500 It's... magnificent. 77 00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:28,420 - I think a round of applause is in order. 78 00:04:30,460 --> 00:04:33,920 - Positions, company! From Mateo's entrance. 79 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:45,020 Who this way comes? 80 00:04:45,220 --> 00:04:48,100 Tis Mateo, a huntsman. 81 00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:52,020 - See how he sharpens his arrows, 82 00:04:52,220 --> 00:04:56,400 unaware this innocent quiver will seal his fate. 83 00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:02,580 - Tis true I neglect my manly duties 84 00:05:02,780 --> 00:05:05,620 and allow my womenfolk to pine, 85 00:05:05,820 --> 00:05:11,900 but can any mortal resist the lure of the ultimate prize, 86 00:05:12,100 --> 00:05:17,080 a creature so white it must have been hewn from moonlight. 87 00:05:29,340 --> 00:05:32,300 - Pick them up and carry on, man! 88 00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:34,460 Shoot me, darling. 89 00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:39,860 Oh. 90 00:05:45,060 --> 00:05:48,380 Ah, someone has returned. 91 00:05:48,580 --> 00:05:50,300 - How are you, my brave soldier? 92 00:05:50,500 --> 00:05:52,540 - No. - You gave us quite a fright. 93 00:05:52,740 --> 00:05:55,140 - Steady. - No, no, no, it can't be. 94 00:05:55,340 --> 00:05:56,880 Where are you going? 95 00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:02,160 The artistic temperament, eh? 96 00:06:02,220 --> 00:06:04,660 - Now where's he going? - I think he needed some air. 97 00:06:04,860 --> 00:06:09,020 - And I need a large whiskey, but we've got a play to put on. 98 00:06:09,220 --> 00:06:11,180 - Might be time to call it a day, Chief Constable. 99 00:06:18,020 --> 00:06:20,860 Excuse me. Thank you. 100 00:06:21,060 --> 00:06:24,140 I'm going in there. Thank you! 101 00:06:26,100 --> 00:06:29,700 Excellent. Bow and arrow? 102 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:34,100 Perfect. Stag runs into clearing? 103 00:06:36,540 --> 00:06:37,700 Needs work. 104 00:06:37,900 --> 00:06:40,160 Right, knife into flesh? 105 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:43,820 Ooh, marvellous! 106 00:06:45,380 --> 00:06:48,940 And finally, a roaring fire? 107 00:06:50,740 --> 00:06:52,340 Jolly well done, old chap! 108 00:06:52,540 --> 00:06:54,860 Right then, Derek, let's get this on, shall we? 109 00:06:55,060 --> 00:06:56,900 We have to raise our game. 110 00:06:57,100 --> 00:06:58,660 The smell should fade. 111 00:06:58,860 --> 00:07:00,860 I really don't want to. 112 00:07:01,060 --> 00:07:02,380 Pull your finger out, man, 113 00:07:02,580 --> 00:07:06,500 - and remember what I taught you. - But... 114 00:07:06,700 --> 00:07:08,980 - We've been in worse predicaments than this before 115 00:07:09,180 --> 00:07:11,660 and come out victorious. 116 00:07:11,860 --> 00:07:14,140 Alright, I'll do it. 117 00:07:14,340 --> 00:07:18,580 - Excellent. Company, gather ye round. 118 00:07:18,780 --> 00:07:23,940 Now, we come to the technically most demanding scene. 119 00:07:24,140 --> 00:07:26,900 Callista stabs Mateo 120 00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:30,420 in a tragic moment of bloody vengeance. 121 00:07:30,620 --> 00:07:32,420 Positions! 122 00:07:32,620 --> 00:07:34,196 - Please, I just wish you would tell me what's going on. 123 00:07:34,220 --> 00:07:36,820 - Just leave it. Trust me, you don't want to know. 124 00:07:37,020 --> 00:07:38,360 - Come on, please. - Lights! 125 00:07:43,560 --> 00:07:47,140 - I come to you in spirit form to offer you a choice. 126 00:07:47,340 --> 00:07:51,720 Admit it was your arrow that slayed me, or feel my vengeance. 127 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:56,660 - I take my orders not from she-demons, 128 00:07:56,860 --> 00:07:59,260 but from mortal men. 129 00:07:59,460 --> 00:08:00,740 Line! 130 00:08:04,100 --> 00:08:05,980 Thank you, Tom. 131 00:08:06,180 --> 00:08:08,260 What's done cannot be undone. 132 00:08:08,460 --> 00:08:10,220 Then your fate is sealed! 133 00:08:11,740 --> 00:08:13,420 Aah! 134 00:08:13,620 --> 00:08:15,156 - Oh, come on, man, you look like you're waiting for a bus. 135 00:08:15,180 --> 00:08:18,220 Aaah, my life ebbs away. 136 00:08:18,420 --> 00:08:21,340 Is this guilt pouring from my veins? 137 00:08:21,540 --> 00:08:24,380 Eee gods, lights! 138 00:08:24,580 --> 00:08:28,300 Lewis, Lewis. Thank you. 139 00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:31,900 Lewis, far be it from me 140 00:08:32,100 --> 00:08:34,340 to put pressure on an actor, 141 00:08:34,540 --> 00:08:38,660 but imagine the entire future of G-SADS, 142 00:08:38,860 --> 00:08:42,700 the... the hopes and dreams of a community, 143 00:08:42,900 --> 00:08:46,060 rest on your performance. 144 00:08:46,260 --> 00:08:49,100 Yes? Good. I'll call an early lunch. 145 00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:50,556 You can run your lines with Myrna. 146 00:08:50,580 --> 00:08:53,940 Oh, a-a-a-and listen... 147 00:08:54,140 --> 00:08:56,460 do it for her. 148 00:08:56,660 --> 00:08:58,700 Do it for Ambrose. 149 00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:01,540 Do it for the Loch Ness monster for all I care, 150 00:09:01,740 --> 00:09:03,860 just don't step on this stage 151 00:09:04,060 --> 00:09:06,420 till you are ready to give us some drama. 152 00:09:15,020 --> 00:09:17,460 - I rue the day I convinced Ambrose's widow 153 00:09:17,660 --> 00:09:19,140 to let us have that play. 154 00:09:19,340 --> 00:09:21,276 It should have stayed in the drawer where she found it. 155 00:09:21,300 --> 00:09:23,820 It was rather a coup, though, Vera. 156 00:09:24,020 --> 00:09:25,900 His only unperformed work. 157 00:09:26,100 --> 00:09:28,380 - Maybe it was never performed because it's so terrible. 158 00:09:28,580 --> 00:09:30,620 - Wait! Let me explain! It's not what you think! 159 00:09:34,380 --> 00:09:39,180 - It seems "The Cursed Arrow" is cursed in more ways than one. 160 00:09:39,380 --> 00:09:40,820 We have a problem. 161 00:09:41,020 --> 00:09:44,660 - Just add feuding thespians to our list of woes 162 00:09:44,860 --> 00:09:47,860 and we shall soldier on in true G-SADS spirit. 163 00:09:48,060 --> 00:09:51,440 No, an even bigger problem. 164 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:54,380 BAPs. 165 00:09:54,580 --> 00:09:56,140 Ah. 166 00:09:56,340 --> 00:09:59,060 - Crack yer head in a paper bag. BAPs! 167 00:09:59,260 --> 00:10:01,660 Barnsford Amateur Players. 168 00:10:01,860 --> 00:10:05,220 - Oh, dear. - Oh, dear with tights on. 169 00:10:05,420 --> 00:10:07,020 They're doing "King Lear." 170 00:10:07,220 --> 00:10:09,660 First performance on Saturday. 171 00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:11,140 - Are they after the grant money? 172 00:10:11,260 --> 00:10:12,660 Is Roger Farnaby a Scotsman? 173 00:10:12,860 --> 00:10:14,340 Is he a Scotsman? 174 00:10:14,540 --> 00:10:17,380 - No idea. All I know is he's Hector's nemesis. 175 00:10:17,580 --> 00:10:20,540 So I expect complete focus, 176 00:10:20,740 --> 00:10:24,140 which means leaving your egos 177 00:10:24,340 --> 00:10:29,100 and petty squabbles at the stage door, understood? 178 00:10:29,300 --> 00:10:32,900 Now, the death scene is our ace in the hole, 179 00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:36,380 so please, let us make it convincing. 180 00:10:36,580 --> 00:10:38,340 - That won't be a problem. - Good. Right. 181 00:10:38,540 --> 00:10:41,180 Greek chorus, to your places. We'll run from page 48. 182 00:10:46,340 --> 00:10:50,580 - But soft, what messenger from the netherworld approaches? 183 00:10:50,780 --> 00:10:54,300 - She who was wronged has returned for vengeance. 184 00:10:54,500 --> 00:10:58,620 - Mateo, I come to you in spirit form to offer you a choice. 185 00:10:58,820 --> 00:11:02,580 Admit it was your arrow that slayed me, or feel my vengeance. 186 00:11:02,780 --> 00:11:07,060 - I take my orders not from she-demons, but from mortal men. 187 00:11:07,260 --> 00:11:09,520 What's done cannot be undone. 188 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,180 Then your fate is sealed! 189 00:11:19,740 --> 00:11:22,040 Oh, eureka! 190 00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:27,320 My very life ebbs away. 191 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:33,020 His very life ebbs away! 192 00:11:33,220 --> 00:11:36,240 Is this guilt pouring from his veins? 193 00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:41,260 - Lewis! - Cut! Bravo! 194 00:11:41,460 --> 00:11:45,100 Well done, Lewis. Best performance so far. 195 00:11:45,300 --> 00:11:47,180 More corn syrup in the blood, perhaps? 196 00:11:47,380 --> 00:11:51,700 - Right you are. - Right, let's go again and die 197 00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:55,540 inside the spotlight this time, please. 198 00:11:55,740 --> 00:11:57,580 - Oh, my. Someone call an ambulance! 199 00:12:03,820 --> 00:12:05,660 Very little blood loss, 200 00:12:05,860 --> 00:12:07,836 which would suggest the blade penetrated straight to the heart 201 00:12:07,860 --> 00:12:10,100 or possibly the aortic root, 202 00:12:10,300 --> 00:12:13,660 resulting in more or less instant death. 203 00:12:15,140 --> 00:12:17,660 - Is that glue? - Apparently so, yes. 204 00:12:17,860 --> 00:12:20,580 Mass-produced prop dagger that's been tampered with. 205 00:12:20,780 --> 00:12:22,260 By Myrna? 206 00:12:22,460 --> 00:12:24,980 - She's adamant she's never seen it before. 207 00:12:25,180 --> 00:12:27,276 - I'm not sure if this is relevant, but, Sister, remember 208 00:12:27,300 --> 00:12:29,220 Lewis did have a strange turn yesterday. 209 00:12:29,420 --> 00:12:31,660 - He collapsed on stage. - Oh, yes. 210 00:12:31,860 --> 00:12:34,580 After seeing the backdrop for the first time. 211 00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:37,060 How odd. 212 00:12:37,260 --> 00:12:40,340 Button, search Lewis' lodgings, will you? 213 00:12:40,540 --> 00:12:42,500 I'll see if our hapless killer can enlighten us. 214 00:12:42,700 --> 00:12:43,780 On it, sir. 215 00:12:52,860 --> 00:12:56,740 - I've been reading about this new American method acting. 216 00:12:56,940 --> 00:12:59,420 I was so immersed in the moment, I had no idea 217 00:12:59,620 --> 00:13:02,360 I had an actual deadly weapon in my hand. 218 00:13:04,560 --> 00:13:07,620 - Apparently Lewis collapsed yesterday. 219 00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:10,860 Do you know why? 220 00:13:11,060 --> 00:13:13,120 - No. He wouldn't talk about it. 221 00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:18,940 Then this morning he was in an odd mood. 222 00:13:19,140 --> 00:13:22,700 Snippy, not himself at all. 223 00:13:22,900 --> 00:13:25,320 - Is that why you two argued earlier today? 224 00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:32,860 - I left my bobby pins in the dressing room, 225 00:13:33,060 --> 00:13:35,460 went back to fetch them, and walked in on him and Hildy. 226 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,320 Take your time. 227 00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:49,360 - I thought he was going to propose. 228 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:53,180 To me. 229 00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:54,780 - That must have been quite a shock. 230 00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:02,780 But I'd never have done anything to hurt him. 231 00:14:02,980 --> 00:14:07,660 Lewis wasn't perfect, but I loved him. 232 00:14:09,980 --> 00:14:11,900 I only agreed to be in this wretched play 233 00:14:12,100 --> 00:14:13,860 so that we could be together. 234 00:14:24,340 --> 00:14:26,380 - It was an expletive deleted bloodbath 235 00:14:26,580 --> 00:14:28,060 he'll never unsee and no mistake. 236 00:14:28,260 --> 00:14:29,740 - Right, okay. Thank you, Tom. 237 00:14:29,940 --> 00:14:32,060 Um, if you remember anything else, please let me know. 238 00:14:32,180 --> 00:14:34,180 Or anyone else that's on duty. 239 00:14:34,380 --> 00:14:36,660 - Right, let's all get this place shipshape again 240 00:14:36,860 --> 00:14:38,580 so we can crack on. 241 00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:41,980 - Sir, might a hiatus be necessary, 242 00:14:42,180 --> 00:14:43,660 you know, pending investigations? 243 00:14:43,860 --> 00:14:45,780 - Where's your Blitz spirit, man? 244 00:14:45,980 --> 00:14:48,020 What is "necessary" is a bucket of sawdust 245 00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:50,140 and a can-do attitude, eh, Pargiter? 246 00:14:50,340 --> 00:14:52,380 Well, uh... 247 00:14:52,580 --> 00:14:56,000 - Although of course, G-SADS are now one man down. 248 00:14:57,640 --> 00:14:59,740 Yes. 249 00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:02,700 You'll do. 250 00:15:02,900 --> 00:15:06,260 I will, of course, take Lewis' role, 251 00:15:06,460 --> 00:15:08,900 and you will be our new Second Huntsman, 252 00:15:09,100 --> 00:15:10,780 no audition required. 253 00:15:10,980 --> 00:15:14,660 Congratulations, and well done. 254 00:15:14,860 --> 00:15:16,140 No, no, sir. I can't. 255 00:15:16,340 --> 00:15:17,940 Acting really is not my cup of tea. 256 00:15:18,140 --> 00:15:19,900 - We'll have a one-to-one rehearsal 257 00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:21,460 first thing in the morning. 258 00:15:21,660 --> 00:15:23,860 And as your commanding officer, that's an order. 259 00:15:24,060 --> 00:15:25,060 Good! 260 00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:27,700 Onwards, company! 261 00:15:34,140 --> 00:15:37,180 One spare, as requested. 262 00:15:37,380 --> 00:15:40,060 I suppose it's not a "spare" anymore. 263 00:15:40,260 --> 00:15:43,260 - What was your relationship like with Lewis? 264 00:15:43,460 --> 00:15:46,380 - I know you two were... - Strictly no-strings. 265 00:15:46,580 --> 00:15:48,500 Myrna was saving herself for marriage, bless her, 266 00:15:48,700 --> 00:15:52,380 so Lewis had quite the itch. 267 00:15:52,580 --> 00:15:55,000 It's a shame Myrna walked in when she did. 268 00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:00,860 I know what I saw. 269 00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:02,300 Why wouldn't they believe me? 270 00:16:02,500 --> 00:16:04,100 My advice is stop fidgeting 271 00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:06,980 till I've finished pinning this hem. 272 00:16:07,180 --> 00:16:10,220 - Have you ever doubted yourself, 273 00:16:10,420 --> 00:16:13,760 your memories, your sense of reality? 274 00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:19,900 Don't feel guilty. 275 00:16:20,100 --> 00:16:21,660 Let me take your mind off whatever it is 276 00:16:21,780 --> 00:16:23,540 that's bothering you. 277 00:16:25,540 --> 00:16:28,580 - Lewis? - Ah, we were, um... 278 00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:32,140 - Stage blood. I was putting it up his toga. 279 00:16:32,340 --> 00:16:35,100 - How could you? - No, no. 280 00:16:35,300 --> 00:16:37,180 Maybe it's best she knows. 281 00:16:37,380 --> 00:16:39,540 Then you and I can... 282 00:16:39,740 --> 00:16:42,420 There is no you and I. 283 00:16:42,620 --> 00:16:45,260 Myrna, wait! 284 00:16:45,460 --> 00:16:46,460 Lewis! 285 00:16:51,540 --> 00:16:52,700 He was acting really strange, 286 00:16:52,820 --> 00:16:55,580 but he trotted after her like a lapdog, 287 00:16:55,780 --> 00:16:58,140 so I went for a smoke. 288 00:16:58,340 --> 00:17:00,140 For a whole hour? 289 00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:04,180 - I was also prepping makeup, styling wigs, sewing costumes, 290 00:17:04,380 --> 00:17:06,700 painting props, cleaning the toilets. 291 00:17:06,900 --> 00:17:09,220 Welcome to Amateur Dramatics. 292 00:17:09,420 --> 00:17:14,900 - Considering your, um, mutual scratching, 293 00:17:15,100 --> 00:17:17,620 you don't seem too bothered by Lewis' death. 294 00:17:17,820 --> 00:17:20,100 No, I'm not bothered. 295 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:22,460 I'm devastated, 296 00:17:22,660 --> 00:17:24,900 but it wouldn't do to let Myrna see that, now would it? 297 00:17:31,140 --> 00:17:33,700 - She's definitely more upset than she's letting on. 298 00:17:33,900 --> 00:17:35,100 Who else is in the frame? 299 00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:36,516 - Everyone who didn't spend the duration 300 00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:38,580 of the lunch break in the foyer. 301 00:17:38,780 --> 00:17:40,116 The thing is, they rehearsed before lunch 302 00:17:40,140 --> 00:17:41,380 and the dagger was un-doctored, 303 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:43,116 so the perpetrator must have made the switch 304 00:17:43,140 --> 00:17:45,260 between 12:00 and 1:00 p.m. 305 00:17:45,460 --> 00:17:47,140 Captain Pargiter apparently always spends 306 00:17:47,340 --> 00:17:48,540 his lunch breaks at home. 307 00:17:48,740 --> 00:17:50,340 Derek was painting the boulder backstage. 308 00:17:50,420 --> 00:17:52,060 And Hildy was mostly in the dressing room, 309 00:17:52,220 --> 00:17:54,580 and, unfortunately for her, 310 00:17:54,780 --> 00:17:58,540 Myrna's alibi is the murder victim's. 311 00:17:58,740 --> 00:18:00,260 What about the dagger? 312 00:18:00,460 --> 00:18:02,220 - Myrna always left it in the same place, 313 00:18:02,420 --> 00:18:05,100 the props table in the wings, stage right. 314 00:18:05,300 --> 00:18:07,620 - Um, may I? - No, I... 315 00:18:07,820 --> 00:18:10,340 - Blunt sprung blade, retracts into the handle on impact. 316 00:18:10,540 --> 00:18:12,500 Harmless and pretty foolproof, as you can see. 317 00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:14,620 Our murder weapon, on the other hand, 318 00:18:14,820 --> 00:18:16,500 tempered steel blade, 319 00:18:16,700 --> 00:18:17,980 glued into position at the handle 320 00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:20,540 using a fast-setting epoxy. 321 00:18:20,740 --> 00:18:23,580 A simple adaptation that would nevertheless 322 00:18:23,780 --> 00:18:26,580 have involved thought, planning, and manual dexterity. 323 00:18:26,780 --> 00:18:28,260 And time. 324 00:18:28,460 --> 00:18:31,500 - Well, depending on our perpetrator's skill, 325 00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:34,300 I'd estimate 5 to 10 minutes to replace the blade 326 00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:36,540 and wait for the glue to set. 327 00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:37,980 Obviously not a permanent bond, 328 00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:40,180 but strong enough for a fatal, single use. 329 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:42,100 Hmm. Any fingerprints? 330 00:18:42,300 --> 00:18:43,820 Oh, yes, mostly bloody, 331 00:18:44,020 --> 00:18:46,420 and nearly all, apart from the victim's, Myrna's. 332 00:18:46,620 --> 00:18:49,740 - Hmm, our innocent proxy murderer. 333 00:18:49,940 --> 00:18:52,020 - Lewis' diary from when he was a boy. 334 00:18:52,220 --> 00:18:54,020 - Good work, Button. - Bravo! 335 00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:55,700 This was on his bed. 336 00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:59,020 He must have looked at it, traumatised, last night. 337 00:18:59,220 --> 00:19:03,060 - "Ma doesn't believe me, but I know what I saw." 338 00:19:03,260 --> 00:19:04,860 Hmm. 339 00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:07,980 "There were two of them, bent over, digging. 340 00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:10,460 I could see a lump. 341 00:19:10,660 --> 00:19:12,820 They dragged it into the hole. 342 00:19:13,020 --> 00:19:15,580 I think it was a dead body." 343 00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:18,180 June 6, 1935. 344 00:19:18,380 --> 00:19:20,636 - Are there any missing persons unaccounted from that time? 345 00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:23,220 - Lowsley was a beat copper back in 1935. 346 00:19:23,420 --> 00:19:26,140 Maybe he's got some intel. 347 00:19:26,340 --> 00:19:28,060 And I know exactly where to find him. 348 00:19:28,260 --> 00:19:32,140 - Kenny Buck, 18 when he went missing, 349 00:19:32,340 --> 00:19:34,780 used to grub about Great Slaughter 350 00:19:34,980 --> 00:19:39,580 with his ne'er-do-well pals, pilfering and pick-pocketing. 351 00:19:39,780 --> 00:19:41,420 Can't remember much else 352 00:19:41,620 --> 00:19:46,020 except that he was a right... royal headache. 353 00:19:46,220 --> 00:19:48,180 - Perhaps a trawl of the police files 354 00:19:48,380 --> 00:19:50,460 might yield some useful information? 355 00:19:50,660 --> 00:19:53,440 - Rather you than me. - Will you excuse me, gents? 356 00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:59,780 - We're throwing caution to the wind. 357 00:19:59,980 --> 00:20:01,860 We're doing no such thing. 358 00:20:02,060 --> 00:20:04,540 It's just been a very taxing day. 359 00:20:04,740 --> 00:20:06,540 - At the risk of taxing you further, 360 00:20:06,740 --> 00:20:10,300 um, might I ask you about your magnificent rendering 361 00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:12,020 of the Plain of Aegis? 362 00:20:12,220 --> 00:20:14,860 Oh, that. 363 00:20:15,060 --> 00:20:16,900 I just read what it said in the play 364 00:20:17,100 --> 00:20:19,620 and sploshed some paint around. 365 00:20:19,820 --> 00:20:21,660 - It reminds me somewhat of a real place. 366 00:20:21,860 --> 00:20:24,140 Ingleby Heath, in fact. 367 00:20:24,340 --> 00:20:27,580 - Ah, yes. Now you come to mention it. 368 00:20:27,780 --> 00:20:29,756 - Might it be possible to borrow a copy of the play 369 00:20:29,780 --> 00:20:32,260 - until tomorrow? - Be my guest. 370 00:20:32,460 --> 00:20:35,100 I'm the only cast member who's off-book, 371 00:20:35,300 --> 00:20:36,900 as we say in the theatre. 372 00:20:37,100 --> 00:20:39,980 - I shall take utmost care as I burn the midnight oil. 373 00:20:40,180 --> 00:20:43,660 - Uh, tonight's dinner is kidney pie. 374 00:20:43,860 --> 00:20:46,580 I'm afraid my purse wouldn't stretch to the steak. 375 00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:48,700 - Don't be late. - Terribly sorry, Mrs. Clam, 376 00:20:48,900 --> 00:20:50,116 but I shall be spending the evening 377 00:20:50,140 --> 00:20:51,540 in the police records office. 378 00:20:51,740 --> 00:20:54,020 - Extra helping for you then, Inspector Gillespie. 379 00:20:54,220 --> 00:20:56,700 Mm. 380 00:20:56,900 --> 00:20:59,000 Callista... 381 00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:04,060 Callista raises the, um... 382 00:21:04,260 --> 00:21:06,660 the what? 383 00:21:06,860 --> 00:21:08,060 Callista raises... 384 00:21:09,860 --> 00:21:12,660 Oh, gosh, is that the time? 385 00:21:12,860 --> 00:21:16,500 I really should, um, just for a moment... 386 00:21:19,340 --> 00:21:20,980 Hello, and welcome, Ambrose Chance, 387 00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:22,900 to this special dead playwrights episode 388 00:21:23,100 --> 00:21:25,260 of "Questions for Thespians." 389 00:21:30,500 --> 00:21:32,660 First question, what's the real reason 390 00:21:32,860 --> 00:21:35,300 "The Cursed Arrow" has been hidden in a drawer until now? 391 00:21:35,500 --> 00:21:36,740 Oh, a strategist, 392 00:21:36,940 --> 00:21:38,660 ladies and gentlemen. Let's try another. 393 00:21:38,860 --> 00:21:41,100 If the Plain of Aegis on the backdrop is an actual place, 394 00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:43,220 are the two huntsmen based on real... 395 00:21:43,420 --> 00:21:45,100 Bonus point for this next question, 396 00:21:45,300 --> 00:21:47,780 did you, Ambrose Chance, know local teenager Kenny Buck? 397 00:21:47,980 --> 00:21:51,060 Wait! Buck... stag. 398 00:21:51,260 --> 00:21:52,836 Um, does the white stag in the play represent... 399 00:21:52,860 --> 00:21:54,180 - Sister? - Quickest on the buzzer 400 00:21:54,380 --> 00:21:55,780 for a bonus point! 401 00:21:55,980 --> 00:21:57,860 - I'm sorry? - Oh. 402 00:21:58,060 --> 00:22:00,220 Oh, my. 403 00:22:00,420 --> 00:22:02,940 I think I've just had my own epiphany. 404 00:22:03,140 --> 00:22:06,140 Anyway, yes, how did you get on? 405 00:22:06,340 --> 00:22:08,060 - No epiphanies, but I did discover 406 00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:09,500 that Kenny got himself mixed up 407 00:22:09,580 --> 00:22:11,500 with a London gang called "The Magpies." 408 00:22:11,700 --> 00:22:13,460 Um, he returned back to Great Slaughter 409 00:22:13,660 --> 00:22:15,196 to look after his sick mother a few months 410 00:22:15,220 --> 00:22:16,300 before he disappeared. 411 00:22:16,500 --> 00:22:18,420 - Well, I'll wager that what 8-year-old 412 00:22:18,620 --> 00:22:22,260 Lewis described in his diary was Kenny's final resting place. 413 00:22:22,460 --> 00:22:28,260 Lewis was simply not believed and forgot about it until he saw 414 00:22:28,460 --> 00:22:29,620 Miss Thimble's backdrop. 415 00:22:29,820 --> 00:22:31,196 - And the next day, he ended up dead. 416 00:22:31,220 --> 00:22:33,740 So these murders must be linked. 417 00:22:33,940 --> 00:22:35,580 Let's share the news with Sam. 418 00:22:35,780 --> 00:22:38,340 Right, you hop in the sidecar, we'll be there in a jiff. 419 00:22:38,540 --> 00:22:40,620 - I can't, I have rehearsals with CC Lowsley 420 00:22:40,820 --> 00:22:42,940 and I don't know my lines. 421 00:22:43,140 --> 00:22:44,756 - Well, is just as well you have the dauntless Tom 422 00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:45,900 Thomas as line prompt then. 423 00:22:46,100 --> 00:22:47,860 Yeah, that's what I fear. 424 00:22:48,060 --> 00:22:50,740 - So you think this play will lead us to Kenny Buck's body? 425 00:22:50,940 --> 00:22:52,500 - Well, the play is about two huntsmen 426 00:22:52,700 --> 00:22:54,740 who become obsessed with a white stag. 427 00:22:54,940 --> 00:22:57,020 Okay, stag, buck. Go on. 428 00:22:57,220 --> 00:22:58,940 - Well, they fire a brace of arrows at it, 429 00:22:59,140 --> 00:23:00,700 but as the animal gasps its last breath, 430 00:23:00,740 --> 00:23:02,940 it transforms into an innocent maiden. 431 00:23:03,140 --> 00:23:04,620 Now you've lost me. 432 00:23:04,820 --> 00:23:06,900 - The stag turned maiden could be a metaphor 433 00:23:07,100 --> 00:23:10,020 for a blameless innocent, possibly a play on words, 434 00:23:10,220 --> 00:23:13,580 chaste as in decorous, and chased as in hunted. 435 00:23:13,780 --> 00:23:17,620 Either way, the huntsmen dispute over whose was the deadly arrow. 436 00:23:17,820 --> 00:23:20,500 They quickly bury her and speak no more of their crime. 437 00:23:20,700 --> 00:23:22,700 Given that the play was written in cathartic style, 438 00:23:22,860 --> 00:23:25,620 - it would appear to be... - A confession? 439 00:23:25,820 --> 00:23:27,420 Indeed. 440 00:23:27,620 --> 00:23:30,460 - So we've got a dead suspect in Ambrose Chance, 441 00:23:30,660 --> 00:23:32,180 but who's our other huntsman? 442 00:23:32,380 --> 00:23:35,300 - Well, that, Inspector, is the ten-bonus-point question. 443 00:23:35,500 --> 00:23:39,500 Ah, behold! 444 00:23:39,700 --> 00:23:43,340 The mythical Plain of Aegis, if I'm not mistaken. 445 00:23:43,540 --> 00:23:49,100 Right, yes, see the burial mounds, identical positions. 446 00:23:49,300 --> 00:23:52,620 The standing stones and large boulder is still here. 447 00:23:52,820 --> 00:23:54,620 There are the three pine trees, look. 448 00:23:54,820 --> 00:23:57,540 So Little Lewis must have been standing here when he... 449 00:23:57,740 --> 00:24:00,700 Wait... 450 00:24:00,900 --> 00:24:03,620 That's Captain Pargiter's house. 451 00:24:03,820 --> 00:24:06,520 More to the point, that's his land. 452 00:24:11,320 --> 00:24:13,340 - I was about to leave for the theatre. 453 00:24:13,540 --> 00:24:15,660 Whitcomb, would you get us some more coffee? 454 00:24:15,860 --> 00:24:17,420 Thank you but no 455 00:24:17,620 --> 00:24:19,276 I don't want to take up any precious rehearsal time. 456 00:24:19,300 --> 00:24:22,820 - Yes, first performance tomorrow, 457 00:24:23,020 --> 00:24:25,260 what with the grant committee and a full house, 458 00:24:25,460 --> 00:24:28,540 the pressure is on somewhat. 459 00:24:28,740 --> 00:24:30,700 Of course we're still reeling from the loss 460 00:24:30,900 --> 00:24:33,020 of our leading man. 461 00:24:33,220 --> 00:24:35,420 - I heard there was some friction between you two? 462 00:24:35,620 --> 00:24:39,740 - Only the usual jovial thespian rivalry. 463 00:24:39,940 --> 00:24:42,980 Tragic business, really. 464 00:24:43,180 --> 00:24:45,660 - And, um, why did you go home for lunch yesterday? 465 00:24:45,860 --> 00:24:48,100 Always do, anything to avoid 466 00:24:48,300 --> 00:24:52,260 Mrs. Clam's mystery-meat sandwiches. 467 00:24:52,460 --> 00:24:54,100 - Captain, might we have your permission 468 00:24:54,300 --> 00:24:57,620 to excavate an area on Ingleby Heath? 469 00:24:57,820 --> 00:24:58,980 Sounds ominous. 470 00:24:59,180 --> 00:25:00,580 - Yes, we're re-opening the case 471 00:25:00,780 --> 00:25:02,500 into the disappearance of Kenny Buck. 472 00:25:02,700 --> 00:25:04,860 Buck... 473 00:25:05,060 --> 00:25:07,620 Buck, yes, I remember. 474 00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:09,260 Long time ago, though? 475 00:25:09,460 --> 00:25:12,020 We have new information. 476 00:25:12,220 --> 00:25:14,140 I see. 477 00:25:14,340 --> 00:25:16,740 I met Kenny once or twice during my time 478 00:25:16,940 --> 00:25:19,860 as patron of the church's Wayward Youth Project. 479 00:25:20,060 --> 00:25:21,420 Seemed nice enough 480 00:25:21,620 --> 00:25:23,036 fell in with the wrong crowd, obviously, 481 00:25:23,060 --> 00:25:24,660 but then so did a lot of boys 482 00:25:24,860 --> 00:25:27,660 who lost their fathers during the war. 483 00:25:27,860 --> 00:25:29,900 And you think he's... 484 00:25:30,100 --> 00:25:33,300 - We think it's a strong possibility, yes. 485 00:25:33,500 --> 00:25:35,620 Poor lad. 486 00:25:35,820 --> 00:25:40,980 One can't help but wish you don't find him out there. 487 00:25:41,180 --> 00:25:43,540 - Do you remember anything else about the case, Captain? 488 00:25:43,740 --> 00:25:46,340 - Nothing specific, lot of trouble 489 00:25:46,540 --> 00:25:48,940 on the heath during those problem years. 490 00:25:49,140 --> 00:25:52,580 Reported a few incidents myself, in fact. 491 00:25:52,780 --> 00:25:55,220 Thank you. 492 00:25:55,420 --> 00:25:57,860 Oh, you didn't know Ambrose Chance, did you? 493 00:25:58,060 --> 00:26:02,700 - Not well, our paths crossed at functions and whatnot. 494 00:26:02,900 --> 00:26:04,220 Why do you ask? 495 00:26:04,420 --> 00:26:05,960 Just ticking boxes. 496 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,460 Is there any point digging deeper? 497 00:26:16,660 --> 00:26:18,900 - The play's quite specific about a shallow grave; 498 00:26:19,100 --> 00:26:20,820 the huntsmen buried the stag where it fell, 499 00:26:21,020 --> 00:26:24,180 by the tree on the right. 500 00:26:24,380 --> 00:26:27,320 - Let's take a break, boys. Regroup in ten. 501 00:26:41,360 --> 00:26:42,700 Is there a reason 502 00:26:42,900 --> 00:26:45,140 you're digging around outside of the cordon? 503 00:26:45,340 --> 00:26:49,160 - Silly mistake, stage left and stage right are opposite. 504 00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:06,000 A bullet. Hidden under three decades of bark. 505 00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:13,220 - Lads, we've been digging under the wrong tree. 506 00:27:13,420 --> 00:27:15,940 - Good dress rehearsal, everyone but more tears in the third act. 507 00:27:16,140 --> 00:27:19,940 Tomorrow is the big day. Curtain up. 508 00:27:20,140 --> 00:27:22,980 And I want each and every one of you here rested 509 00:27:23,180 --> 00:27:25,500 and word perfect. Hildy? 510 00:27:25,700 --> 00:27:28,100 I've got a wobbly rampart, stage right. 511 00:27:28,300 --> 00:27:30,220 Be right there. 512 00:27:30,420 --> 00:27:33,380 He's in high dudgeon. Or is it low. 513 00:27:33,580 --> 00:27:34,940 One of the dudgeons anyway. 514 00:27:35,140 --> 00:27:38,100 He's just discovered BAPS have a dramaturg. 515 00:27:38,300 --> 00:27:41,100 - Oh. - Do you need any help, Myrna? 516 00:27:41,300 --> 00:27:44,760 - I can do it, thank you. - Suit yourself. 517 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:01,120 This must not be easy for you? 518 00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:04,836 - Sometimes I don't know how to put one foot 519 00:28:04,860 --> 00:28:07,740 in front of the other. 520 00:28:07,940 --> 00:28:09,480 But I'd rather keep busy. 521 00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:15,920 - The truth will out, Myrna, be sure of that. 522 00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:24,620 - Can't be easy for you either, stepping in at the last minute? 523 00:28:24,820 --> 00:28:26,320 Any more costumes? 524 00:28:32,120 --> 00:28:33,820 What kind of bird is that? 525 00:28:34,020 --> 00:28:37,460 - I wish I knew, that'll teach me for getting drunk in Blackpool 526 00:28:37,660 --> 00:28:39,060 on my 18th birthday. 527 00:28:39,260 --> 00:28:41,900 - You can take this. - Thank you. 528 00:28:46,060 --> 00:28:48,820 - Seems like we're running out of daylight and morale. 529 00:28:49,020 --> 00:28:52,460 - And orange squash. No one likes the lemon. 530 00:28:52,660 --> 00:28:54,820 - Are you sure we haven't missed something in the text? 531 00:28:54,940 --> 00:28:57,780 No other coded meanings or hidden information? 532 00:28:57,980 --> 00:28:59,660 Well, it's hard to know. 533 00:28:59,860 --> 00:29:02,780 Classics, unlike viticulture, not being an exact science. 534 00:29:02,980 --> 00:29:06,580 - Sir? - Finally. 535 00:29:17,740 --> 00:29:19,640 Trowel please, Peggy? 536 00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:24,340 - Sister. - Thank you. 537 00:29:37,900 --> 00:29:41,140 One tibia. 538 00:29:41,340 --> 00:29:44,220 What's this? 539 00:29:44,420 --> 00:29:47,140 One pair of glasses. 540 00:29:47,340 --> 00:29:49,160 And one mystery solved. 541 00:29:56,720 --> 00:29:59,260 - You can't ascertain cause of death from this, can you? 542 00:29:59,460 --> 00:30:00,980 - Well, there certainly isn't an arrow 543 00:30:01,180 --> 00:30:04,100 conveniently protruding from his chest cavity but... 544 00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:08,580 Oh! Aha! 545 00:30:08,780 --> 00:30:09,860 A rifle bullet? 546 00:30:10,060 --> 00:30:12,260 9 mm would be my guess, 547 00:30:12,460 --> 00:30:15,300 though hard to say exactly given the degree of corrosion, 548 00:30:15,500 --> 00:30:17,580 but I'll try to clean it up and get some more detail. 549 00:30:17,740 --> 00:30:20,860 Morning Team, how are... ugh, 550 00:30:21,060 --> 00:30:23,036 you never get used to some of these things on this job. 551 00:30:23,060 --> 00:30:25,980 Quite so. 552 00:30:26,180 --> 00:30:28,500 Derek has a tattoo of a bird. 553 00:30:28,700 --> 00:30:30,180 A Magpie. 554 00:30:30,380 --> 00:30:32,420 - Kenny's gang? - Are you sure? 555 00:30:32,620 --> 00:30:36,300 - Well, the records show that Kenny here, 556 00:30:36,500 --> 00:30:38,620 and Derek got a warning for getting into a fight 557 00:30:38,820 --> 00:30:42,380 at a cinema a week before Kenny disappeared. 558 00:30:42,580 --> 00:30:45,220 Top marks, Felix! 559 00:30:45,420 --> 00:30:48,820 - I guess we'd better talk to our erstwhile Magpie. 560 00:30:49,020 --> 00:30:53,020 - Alright, so I knocked about with that lot and yes, 561 00:30:53,220 --> 00:30:57,140 I'll admit, there were bad blood between me and Kenny. 562 00:30:57,340 --> 00:30:59,620 He had a gift of getting on the wrong side of people. 563 00:30:59,820 --> 00:31:02,180 People like who? 564 00:31:02,380 --> 00:31:03,660 Ambrose Chance? 565 00:31:03,860 --> 00:31:05,380 - Ambrose wouldn't have wasted his time 566 00:31:05,540 --> 00:31:07,900 - on a scrote like Kenny. - But you would? 567 00:31:08,100 --> 00:31:11,580 - No, I gave up my gang proclivities decades ago, 568 00:31:11,780 --> 00:31:15,380 thanks to the church and the Wayward Youth Project. 569 00:31:15,580 --> 00:31:17,636 - So you must have known Captain Pargiter, back then? 570 00:31:17,660 --> 00:31:19,060 Yes, Sir. 571 00:31:19,260 --> 00:31:22,580 I was also in his regiment... Glorious Glosters. 572 00:31:22,780 --> 00:31:25,620 Me and Kenny, sorry, Kenny and I, 573 00:31:25,820 --> 00:31:28,540 used to do odd jobs around the estate. 574 00:31:28,740 --> 00:31:30,380 And Ambrose and the Captain even let us 575 00:31:30,580 --> 00:31:32,620 shoot the odd round of clay pigeons. 576 00:31:32,820 --> 00:31:35,300 - Sorry, Ambrose Chance and Captain Pargiter 577 00:31:35,500 --> 00:31:38,260 - knew each other? - Yes. They were friends. 578 00:31:38,460 --> 00:31:41,500 Ambrose was an arse but he was great fun. 579 00:31:43,340 --> 00:31:44,740 - Curtains up in an hour and a half. 580 00:31:44,820 --> 00:31:46,196 Chief says you're to bring his cast and crew 581 00:31:46,220 --> 00:31:47,780 back to the theatre PDQ. 582 00:31:47,980 --> 00:31:49,380 - Fair enough, I need to interrogate 583 00:31:49,580 --> 00:31:50,860 one of his leading men anyway. 584 00:31:51,060 --> 00:31:52,600 Break a leg with that, Sir. 585 00:31:56,060 --> 00:31:57,340 Had I known, had I known. 586 00:31:57,540 --> 00:31:59,580 That at nightfall a great and terrible... 587 00:31:59,780 --> 00:32:03,380 - Red Lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, yellow lorry... 588 00:32:03,580 --> 00:32:06,420 - La, la, la, la, la, la, la. La, la, la, la, la, la, la. 589 00:32:06,620 --> 00:32:10,680 La, la, la, la, la, la, la. La, la, la, la, la, la, la. 590 00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:16,940 - Red Lorry, yellow lorry, red lorry, 591 00:32:17,140 --> 00:32:19,900 - yellow lorry... - Finally! 592 00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:22,300 - What time d'you call this? - I'm sorry, Sir. 593 00:32:22,500 --> 00:32:25,220 - Gillespie. Haven't you made enough disruption for one day? 594 00:32:25,420 --> 00:32:26,620 This can't wait, I'm afraid. 595 00:32:26,820 --> 00:32:31,000 - Gosh, it's like Laurel and Hardy round here! 596 00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,060 - We found Kenny's body on his land, 597 00:32:39,260 --> 00:32:40,860 he lied about knowing Ambrose Chance. 598 00:32:41,060 --> 00:32:44,140 He was obviously trying to silence Lewis. 599 00:32:44,340 --> 00:32:45,980 - Should I get Peggy to shut the house 600 00:32:46,180 --> 00:32:48,820 - and send everybody home? - You'll do no such thing! 601 00:32:49,020 --> 00:32:51,940 Look, that's the grant committee and you're not even in costume! 602 00:32:52,140 --> 00:32:53,420 Skidaddle! 603 00:32:57,780 --> 00:33:01,500 Do none of you people respect the sanctity of the theatre? 604 00:33:01,700 --> 00:33:03,700 This couldn't wait. 605 00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:05,660 I'm all ears, Sister. 606 00:33:05,860 --> 00:33:07,260 - There's evidence of an entry wound 607 00:33:07,380 --> 00:33:09,020 at the edge of Kenny's scapula. 608 00:33:09,220 --> 00:33:10,660 Bone fragments from the sixth rib, 609 00:33:10,860 --> 00:33:13,260 - where the bullet exited. - Meaning? 610 00:33:13,460 --> 00:33:17,100 - Meaning, with a few trajectory calculations 611 00:33:17,300 --> 00:33:20,180 I can say without doubt that Kenny was shot in the back. 612 00:33:20,380 --> 00:33:23,780 As if he was running away. After all, Kenny was a Magpie. 613 00:33:23,980 --> 00:33:26,140 I'd say that he was caught stealing... 614 00:33:26,340 --> 00:33:29,500 - Pargiter's no murderer. - You can't deny he is a hunter. 615 00:33:29,700 --> 00:33:30,980 - Yes, but where's your evidence? 616 00:33:31,180 --> 00:33:33,460 You're holding it, Sir. 617 00:33:33,660 --> 00:33:35,340 Five minutes till curtain up. 618 00:33:35,540 --> 00:33:38,780 - Bring me a matching gun or a confession, 619 00:33:38,980 --> 00:33:40,500 then you can take him. 620 00:33:43,780 --> 00:33:45,580 - Fancy a trip to the Captain's gun cabinet? 621 00:33:45,780 --> 00:33:48,660 Yes, please. 622 00:33:48,860 --> 00:33:51,380 Right, places, everyone! 623 00:33:51,580 --> 00:33:53,460 Make sure you nail that first line, Dottie. 624 00:33:53,660 --> 00:33:56,740 - Will do. - Curtain, Derek. 625 00:34:08,440 --> 00:34:11,580 - What's the line again? - Save us, Vera. 626 00:34:16,060 --> 00:34:18,500 Welcome to this, 627 00:34:18,700 --> 00:34:21,460 a warning rendered in words, 628 00:34:21,660 --> 00:34:24,620 a carnival of souls. 629 00:34:24,820 --> 00:34:30,220 Is this a tale of treachery, or of a man wronged? 630 00:34:30,420 --> 00:34:35,540 Only the Gods know what smoke and mirrors we mortals weave. 631 00:34:35,740 --> 00:34:41,540 Oh, oh... 632 00:34:41,740 --> 00:34:44,500 What treasures and mysteries 633 00:34:44,700 --> 00:34:49,100 abound within this sphere, to be but discovered 634 00:34:49,300 --> 00:34:54,920 and conquered by a vigourous youth such as I! 635 00:34:57,680 --> 00:35:01,460 - Hmm, the ethics of lock picking are somewhat complex. 636 00:35:01,660 --> 00:35:04,380 - Can't you just say a few hail Marys? 637 00:35:04,580 --> 00:35:06,540 - Unfortunately, the Lord doesn't operate on a buy 638 00:35:06,580 --> 00:35:08,260 now pay later basis. 639 00:35:08,460 --> 00:35:09,460 Bingo! 640 00:35:09,620 --> 00:35:12,580 Yes! 641 00:35:12,780 --> 00:35:14,300 Quite an arsenal. 642 00:35:14,500 --> 00:35:18,020 - Couple of shot guns, but no rifle. 643 00:35:18,220 --> 00:35:20,700 - Wait. Perhaps our murder weapon has been staring us 644 00:35:20,900 --> 00:35:23,100 in the face this entire time. 645 00:35:23,300 --> 00:35:24,860 Wrong calibre. 646 00:35:25,060 --> 00:35:27,220 - Actually, it's what's missing that caught my eye. 647 00:35:27,420 --> 00:35:31,220 See the photograph, and the empty scabbard? 648 00:35:31,420 --> 00:35:33,420 The bayonet's been removed. 649 00:35:33,620 --> 00:35:37,180 - Yes. And used to kill Lewis Garner. 650 00:35:37,380 --> 00:35:39,420 - We should be able to get back for the interval. 651 00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:07,740 - You'd better be bringing me a choc-ice, Gillespie, 652 00:36:07,940 --> 00:36:09,820 and not another half-baked supposition? 653 00:36:10,020 --> 00:36:11,660 - Pargiter is definitely our man. 654 00:36:11,860 --> 00:36:15,300 - Can he please be our man, just till the end of the show? 655 00:36:15,500 --> 00:36:17,620 He's a double murderer, Sir. 656 00:36:17,820 --> 00:36:21,060 - Surely protocol would dictate... - Let me worry about protocol. 657 00:36:21,260 --> 00:36:23,180 You worry about your lacklustre performance, 658 00:36:23,380 --> 00:36:26,140 Livingstone. 659 00:36:26,340 --> 00:36:28,660 Surround the theatre, you can take him 660 00:36:28,860 --> 00:36:30,980 as soon as the curtain falls. 661 00:36:31,180 --> 00:36:34,460 Depart. 662 00:36:34,660 --> 00:36:37,460 - Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats, 663 00:36:37,660 --> 00:36:40,140 the performance is about to continue. 664 00:36:40,340 --> 00:36:42,260 - Let's hope this is fast and painless. 665 00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:59,340 - What great adventures await us, on this... 666 00:37:01,540 --> 00:37:04,380 Broccoli? 667 00:37:04,580 --> 00:37:06,140 Bright day. 668 00:37:06,340 --> 00:37:09,700 Oh. Bright day! 669 00:37:09,900 --> 00:37:13,780 How lucky we are to have such... 670 00:37:13,980 --> 00:37:16,580 Youth and purpose. 671 00:37:16,780 --> 00:37:19,700 - Yawning purpose. - Youth and purpose! 672 00:37:19,900 --> 00:37:23,920 - Youth and purpose! As we stride forth... 673 00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:31,180 You've been called. 674 00:37:31,380 --> 00:37:33,220 - You sure you're alright to do this? 675 00:37:33,420 --> 00:37:35,300 The show must go on. 676 00:37:35,500 --> 00:37:37,940 You're a trooper. 677 00:37:38,140 --> 00:37:40,620 Myrna, you were always the one... 678 00:37:40,820 --> 00:37:44,020 - I know. I'm doing this for him. 679 00:37:44,220 --> 00:37:45,660 He'd be proud. 680 00:37:45,860 --> 00:37:49,740 But don't do it for him. Do it for yourself. 681 00:37:49,940 --> 00:37:52,500 Okay. Go on. 682 00:37:56,700 --> 00:37:59,780 How dark seems the night, 683 00:37:59,980 --> 00:38:03,820 when we comprehend the danger therein. 684 00:38:04,020 --> 00:38:07,700 And how small and alone is man, 685 00:38:07,900 --> 00:38:10,580 when at the mercy of a ravenous beast! 686 00:38:14,180 --> 00:38:16,940 Had I known that at nightfall 687 00:38:17,140 --> 00:38:19,500 a great and terrible bear 688 00:38:19,700 --> 00:38:23,580 would tear apart my very soul. 689 00:38:23,780 --> 00:38:26,660 - Hold your nerve, noble shepherd. 690 00:38:29,180 --> 00:38:31,780 - Oh. Um... - Stop that Shepherd! 691 00:38:31,980 --> 00:38:35,380 - It shall be the, um, the policeman with the handcuffs! 692 00:38:35,580 --> 00:38:38,860 - Stop! - Hark? Is that thunder I hear? 693 00:38:39,060 --> 00:38:41,380 - You have no proof! - We have all the proof we need. 694 00:38:41,580 --> 00:38:45,100 - Grab him Felix! - Ah, you are mistaken Mateo. 695 00:38:45,300 --> 00:38:48,380 Tis but the terrible bear after all. 696 00:38:48,580 --> 00:38:50,476 Who knew his presence would be such sweet relief? 697 00:38:50,500 --> 00:38:52,860 Get away from me Gillespie! 698 00:38:53,060 --> 00:38:56,020 - Behold, what nightmarish visions 699 00:38:56,220 --> 00:39:01,260 may befall the insubordinate mind. 700 00:39:01,460 --> 00:39:03,980 - Sorry. - Friends! 701 00:39:04,180 --> 00:39:06,580 Let us start anew! 702 00:39:06,780 --> 00:39:08,180 From page 41. 703 00:39:08,380 --> 00:39:12,900 - Rather let us, let us exit, being pursued by a bear. 704 00:39:13,100 --> 00:39:16,180 Or rather pursuing, pursuing the bear. 705 00:39:16,380 --> 00:39:19,260 - Methinks the second huntsman is, in all regards, 706 00:39:19,460 --> 00:39:20,980 is in the wrong play. 707 00:39:22,660 --> 00:39:26,460 Stop him! 708 00:39:26,660 --> 00:39:30,220 - The Shepherd returneth to his flock 709 00:39:30,420 --> 00:39:34,180 great be that the fates allow him to tend them 710 00:39:34,380 --> 00:39:37,560 before the conclusion of our tale. 711 00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:49,540 - Curtains for you, Shepherd. I mean, Captain. 712 00:39:49,740 --> 00:39:53,380 - I supposed you're both very pleased with yourselves? 713 00:39:53,580 --> 00:39:56,940 An arresting performance, Sir. 714 00:39:57,140 --> 00:39:59,340 You shot a teenager in the back. 715 00:39:59,540 --> 00:40:02,460 A boy, who you were supposed to be helping. 716 00:40:02,660 --> 00:40:04,740 I did help Kenny, 717 00:40:04,940 --> 00:40:08,260 and he repaid me by breaking into my home. 718 00:40:08,460 --> 00:40:11,180 - He was unarmed and running away. 719 00:40:11,380 --> 00:40:14,580 - A man has a right to protect his own property. 720 00:40:14,780 --> 00:40:18,780 We caught the little deviant redhanded. 721 00:40:18,980 --> 00:40:20,300 Oi! 722 00:40:20,500 --> 00:40:23,340 So then Ambrose, fancy another trophy? 723 00:40:23,540 --> 00:40:25,640 - So you hunted him down like an animal? 724 00:40:34,560 --> 00:40:36,780 - You can't prove it was my bullet that killed him. 725 00:40:36,980 --> 00:40:38,700 - We won't need to in order to send you down 726 00:40:38,900 --> 00:40:41,260 for a very long time. 727 00:40:41,460 --> 00:40:43,580 - We'll see what my solicitors have to say about that. 728 00:40:43,780 --> 00:40:47,940 - It must have been a relief when Ambrose died, 729 00:40:48,140 --> 00:40:49,680 taking your secret with him. 730 00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:54,240 If only there hadn't been a witness. 731 00:40:58,520 --> 00:41:02,140 - You're the second huntsman. - What are you on about, man? 732 00:41:02,340 --> 00:41:04,940 I'm the shepherd. Learn the script for heavens sake. 733 00:41:05,140 --> 00:41:09,760 - This play, it's Ambrose's confession, isn't it? 734 00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:15,900 Oh, you didn't realise? 735 00:41:16,100 --> 00:41:17,580 The whole time we've been rehearsing, 736 00:41:17,780 --> 00:41:20,460 you didn't have a clue. 737 00:41:20,660 --> 00:41:23,020 Well, I remembered everything, 738 00:41:23,220 --> 00:41:26,900 the moment I saw that backdrop. 739 00:41:27,100 --> 00:41:29,780 You're a murderer. 740 00:41:29,980 --> 00:41:33,220 I'm a decorated veteran. 741 00:41:33,420 --> 00:41:36,580 - Then let's see what the police think. 742 00:41:36,780 --> 00:41:40,900 - Who's going to believe the testimony of a child, 743 00:41:41,100 --> 00:41:44,640 30 years after the event? 744 00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:52,960 I'd be very careful if I were you. 745 00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:58,080 So you silenced him, right? 746 00:41:59,720 --> 00:42:03,740 You doctored the dagger and you used poor Myrna 747 00:42:03,940 --> 00:42:05,640 to do your dirty work. 748 00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:10,780 Hopefully Myrna will be able to start again. 749 00:42:10,980 --> 00:42:13,900 Unlike those two men whose lives you ended on a whim. 750 00:42:14,100 --> 00:42:18,940 - No need to get sentimental, Inspector Gillespie. 751 00:42:19,140 --> 00:42:20,460 Preston Hadley Pargiter, 752 00:42:20,660 --> 00:42:22,436 I'm arresting you for the murders of Kenny Buck 753 00:42:22,460 --> 00:42:23,580 and Lewis Garner. 754 00:42:23,780 --> 00:42:24,796 You are not obliged to say anything 755 00:42:24,820 --> 00:42:26,460 unless you wish to do so 756 00:42:26,660 --> 00:42:28,076 but anything you do say may be put into writing 757 00:42:28,100 --> 00:42:29,420 and given in evidence. 758 00:42:34,300 --> 00:42:37,580 - Chins up, G-SADS, only three more shows to go. 759 00:42:37,780 --> 00:42:39,860 But we've lost half our cast. 760 00:42:40,060 --> 00:42:46,100 - I could perform it as a one man play experimental, you know? 761 00:42:46,300 --> 00:42:47,540 Give BAPS a run for it's money. 762 00:42:47,620 --> 00:42:49,940 - We're already a laughing stock. 763 00:42:50,140 --> 00:42:51,680 No offence. 764 00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:56,380 Oh, Morning all. 765 00:42:56,580 --> 00:42:58,196 The good news is I brought some leftover madeira 766 00:42:58,220 --> 00:43:02,140 cake from the polio fundraiser. 767 00:43:02,340 --> 00:43:04,140 And the bad news. 768 00:43:04,340 --> 00:43:08,020 - Ah, well, I trust Roger Farnaby will be happy 769 00:43:08,220 --> 00:43:11,000 having something more to gloat about. 770 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:18,460 - "The Cursed Arrow fell well short of its target... 771 00:43:18,660 --> 00:43:20,660 turgid and incomprehensible"? 772 00:43:20,860 --> 00:43:23,100 Who wrote this drivel? "However... 773 00:43:23,300 --> 00:43:25,740 "It was agreed that the play had surreal 774 00:43:25,940 --> 00:43:29,820 echoes of early Beckett." 775 00:43:30,020 --> 00:43:33,020 "While the cast were somewhat unpolished 776 00:43:33,220 --> 00:43:38,460 and with, um, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, 777 00:43:38,660 --> 00:43:42,380 it was thought that Mr. Livingstone was a rare talent 778 00:43:42,580 --> 00:43:46,460 with a remarkable gift for the avant-garde." 779 00:43:46,660 --> 00:43:48,020 "with all things considered, 780 00:43:48,220 --> 00:43:50,260 we are very pleased to confirm G-SADS 781 00:43:50,460 --> 00:43:53,620 the worthy recipient of the inaugural grant 782 00:43:53,820 --> 00:43:57,180 for Most Promising Cultural Endeavour." 783 00:43:57,380 --> 00:43:59,520 No! Never! 784 00:44:03,400 --> 00:44:05,340 Onwards!