1 00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:10,880 2 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,280 3 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:16,600 4 00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:22,640 5 00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:26,720 6 00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:31,680 DOORBELL RINGS 7 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:37,080 Good morning, name of Hardcastle? 8 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:39,960 That's right. Ignore his face he's got the hump. 9 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:42,000 I've got the right to have the hump. 10 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:45,240 Not on duty you haven't, it's unprofessional. Now smile! 11 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:49,400 You can look at his face now, if you like? 12 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:51,920 I think I preferred him with the hump! 13 00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:54,080 All over a bag of toffees. 14 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:56,880 Chocolate raisins! Toffees! 15 00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:59,600 Are you here specifically for a row, or something else? 16 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:01,400 Sorry, name of Hardcastle. 17 00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:05,320 Yeah, we've established that. So we did. Delivery for you.Cots. 18 00:01:05,320 --> 00:01:07,760 Cots? Cots. 19 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:11,320 For babies. I think you've got the wrong address. 20 00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,800 You claimed your name was Hardcastle. 21 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:17,240 I didn't CLAIM anything, it is. So where do you want the cots? 22 00:01:19,320 --> 00:01:22,360 Jean? She'll know, women always know where to put things. 23 00:01:22,360 --> 00:01:23,440 If you were a woman, 24 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:26,240 you'd never have put that bag of toffees on my seat. 25 00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:28,960 They were chocolate raisins. What's going on? 26 00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:32,840 We're having a fascinating debate about toffees.Chocolate raisins! 27 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:34,320 Or chocolate raisins, 28 00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:37,760 which seems to have obscured the fact they're also insisting on 29 00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:39,760 delivering two babies' cots. I see. 30 00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:41,880 Now come on, be honest, 31 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:45,120 was it toffees or chocolate raisins? Toffees.Raisins. 32 00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:49,600 Chocolate raisins. 33 00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:51,160 That's that settled. 34 00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:54,240 The cots go upstairs, follow me. 35 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,120 MOBILE PLAYS LULLABY 36 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:06,040 Oh, aren't they sweet? 37 00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:09,920 There's nobody there. The cots! Yes, they're very nice. 38 00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:12,720 I saw them. I couldn't resist them. What are they for? 39 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,520 Babies, of course! Whose babies? 40 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:18,160 Julie and Sandy's babies. I didn't even know they were pregnant. 41 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:21,680 They're not as far as I know. But they will be, it stands to reason. 42 00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:24,320 Your reason, presumably? Yes. 43 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:27,960 Assuming you're right, why have we got two cots here already? 44 00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:29,680 Lionel, do be sensible, 45 00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:33,000 for when they want us to look after the babies. 46 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,480 Have you got their names down for school yet?! 47 00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:41,800 I do wish you'd stop doing that. Don't you want grandchildren? 48 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:44,480 Not imaginary ones, no. 49 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:45,640 I'm not sure. 50 00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:49,320 Of course you do. I've just said, I wasn't sure. 51 00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:54,400 This wallpaper's not right. What's the wallpaper got to do with it? 52 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:56,360 It's too stern for babies. 53 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:59,400 Stern?! Babies need something colourful. 54 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:03,800 The curtains are rather frightening too. 55 00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:08,960 I think I'll have a custard tart. 56 00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:14,800 LIONEL'S DREAM MUSIC: "Oranges And Lemons" 57 00:03:56,440 --> 00:03:58,640 I wish you wouldn't do that. 58 00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,520 I was having a nightmare. 59 00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:02,840 Too many custard tarts. 60 00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:06,480 What was it about? Babe... 61 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:07,880 Bay leaves. 62 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:12,240 How on earth can you have a nightmare about bay leaves? 63 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:16,960 Well, I was one. You were actually a bay leaf? Yes. 64 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:18,800 I was in this casserole, you see, 65 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,720 cooking away and I didn't like the onions. 66 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,480 A bay leaf with emotions?! 67 00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:25,760 Well, it was a nightmare. 68 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:28,800 It's unbelievable, isn't it? Yes, it is. 69 00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:31,200 You were going to say babies, weren't you? 70 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,080 All right, yes. 71 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:36,760 Now, what in heaven's name can be nightmarish about babies? 72 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:38,280 When they multiply. 73 00:04:38,280 --> 00:04:40,280 Oh, Lionel, stop it. 74 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,200 They wouldn't be just any old babies, 75 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:44,880 they'd be our grandchildren, they'd be part of us. 76 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:48,560 In case you've forgotten, Judy's not my daughter. 77 00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:50,360 And Sandy's not our daughter. 78 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:52,480 Well, she's become like a daughter. 79 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:57,320 She and Harry come back from Canada tomorrow. I have missed her. 80 00:04:57,320 --> 00:04:59,320 Mm, so have I. 81 00:04:59,320 --> 00:05:02,520 So how many babies have they had in the year, do you suppose? 82 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:05,600 This is for the future, and for Judy and Alistair. 83 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:08,640 Hence the cots and the non-frightening curtains? 84 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:12,560 Well, they'll want us to look after them sometimes, won't they? 85 00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:14,480 Unless you're refusing to do it? 86 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:18,240 Now you're talking in the present tense! There AREN'T any babies! 87 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:20,480 They might not even want babies. 88 00:05:22,200 --> 00:05:25,560 You can be really depressing when you put your mind to it. 89 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:26,680 I didn't mean to be. 90 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:28,600 No, I know. 91 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:32,680 I still think we should have picked up Harry and Sandy from the airport. 92 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,920 No, it's best Alistair does it, he has a way with airports - 93 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:38,240 like parking right outside the terminal. 94 00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:40,280 Why can't you do things like that? 95 00:05:40,280 --> 00:05:42,920 I'm gifted in other areas. 96 00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:46,320 Shall we go back to sleep now? Yes. 97 00:05:46,320 --> 00:05:48,840 Goodnight. Goodnight. 98 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:52,000 Grandad(!) 99 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:58,160 OH! Oh! 100 00:05:58,160 --> 00:05:59,720 What is it? 101 00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:01,160 I was having a nightmare, 102 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:02,880 I was a carrot in your casserole. 103 00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:06,680 DOORBELL RINGS 104 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:09,200 Come on, they're here. I'm coming, I'm coming. 105 00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:11,240 Sandy!Hello. 106 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:15,120 Harry! Hello. Sandy. 107 00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:18,800 How's my old married lady? Harry, how are you? All right. 108 00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:20,280 Fine! 109 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:28,600 Tired from the journey, I expect. 110 00:06:34,280 --> 00:06:36,160 Well... 111 00:06:46,480 --> 00:06:48,960 KNOCK ON THE DOOR 112 00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:51,080 Go away. 113 00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:53,320 Sorry, I thought it was Harry. 114 00:06:54,840 --> 00:06:56,920 He thinks you're tired from the journey. 115 00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:58,440 Does he really? 116 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:00,560 Oh, Sandy, what's the matter? 117 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:02,800 It's Harry. 118 00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:05,200 It was all so lovely, 119 00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:07,920 and now he's decided to kill himself. 120 00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:11,440 Armed response? 121 00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:13,800 Yes.That guns, isn't it? 122 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:17,280 Well, obviously. Look, nothing's finalised, but I want to get on 123 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:20,720 the fast track and volunteering for this could be a way of doing it. 124 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:22,520 Well, no wonder Sandy's upset, 125 00:07:22,520 --> 00:07:25,360 I'd be upset if Alistair wanted to do something dangerous. 126 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:29,800 Not that he would. Publishing isn't the safest profession, you know. 127 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:31,440 You don't get shot doing it. 128 00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:34,640 All publishers make enemies. Oh, Alistair! 129 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:35,880 I keep telling Sandy, 130 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:39,400 I'm after a promotion, not getting shot. I just need to get on. 131 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:42,440 I've got this Russian author with a really nasty temper. 132 00:07:42,440 --> 00:07:43,480 If I were to tell him 133 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:46,640 his next book isn't exactly going to light up Red Square... 134 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:49,320 The most he'll do is throw a bowl of borscht at you. 135 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:51,440 Now, when did you tell Sandy this? 136 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:53,440 Not long before we came home. 137 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:58,120 Oh, dear! He could be in the Russian Mafia for all I know. Nasty! 138 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,720 Could be, Harry, could be. 139 00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:02,560 Alistair, stop posturing. 140 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:05,800 Are you sure you've got the right word?Positive. 141 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:09,920 What Harry's talking about is real danger. Lionel? What? 142 00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:12,840 What do you think? 143 00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:14,840 Well, it's not my life. 144 00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:16,560 To put at risk, you mean? 145 00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:19,400 No, I mean it's not my life, it's not my career. 146 00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:22,440 And let's face it, being a policeman isn't the safest job 147 00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:24,160 in the world in the first place. 148 00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:27,080 That's what I said to Sandy. Oh, how very reassuring! 149 00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:29,200 Give the guy a break. 150 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,840 It's his territory and danger goes with the territory. 151 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:35,280 It's like Li fighting lions in Kenya. 152 00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:37,400 I didn't fight any lions in Kenya. 153 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:40,800 What about fighting the Russians in Korea? 154 00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:43,480 You should brush up on your history, Alistair! 155 00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:45,560 Japanese then... 156 00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:48,000 Seriously brush up on your history! 157 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:51,120 What does Sandy want me to be anyway, a traffic warden? 158 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:54,720 Well, don't just sit there, go up to her. 159 00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,680 Not all of you! 160 00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:58,160 Harry. 161 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:03,600 Well, you're a fine lot. What have we done? 162 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,400 You've obviously not talked him round, that's what. 163 00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:12,240 Mum, what are you doing? 164 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:15,400 This is a substitute for hitting somebody over the head. 165 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:17,520 Oh, I'm sorry, Mum, I did try, honestly. 166 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:19,960 Harry's got that stubborn look on his face, 167 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:21,800 Lionel says it's not his business, 168 00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:25,720 Alistair's busy convincing everyone he's a target for the Russian Mafia. 169 00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:28,440 It's typical Lionel. 170 00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:31,880 Did you say Russian Mafia? You don't want to go there! 171 00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:33,920 Perhaps not. Coffee? 172 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:35,920 I'll make it, you should sit down. 173 00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:38,640 No, no, I'm not tired.Nevertheless. 174 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:40,880 Nevertheless. 175 00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:46,520 I've never asked you how you and Alistair are? 176 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,480 You only saw us last week. 177 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:51,640 Yes, I know, I meant as a marriage? 178 00:09:51,640 --> 00:09:54,400 Well, we're fine, we really are. 179 00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:56,760 You could never describe Alistair as dull, 180 00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,960 apart from the odd, little flight into Never-Never Land, 181 00:09:59,960 --> 00:10:02,040 we're fine, we really are. 182 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:04,600 Good.Yes. 183 00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:06,120 That's really good. 184 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,160 Mum, I'm not pregnant. 185 00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,680 Who mentioned pregnancy? 186 00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:17,120 You don't have to, you might as well have it printed on your forehead! 187 00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:20,760 I'd love grandchildren. There's nothing wrong with that, is there? 188 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:22,720 No, no, I suppose there isn't. 189 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:25,920 And so would Lionel.Are you sure? 190 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,320 He'll come round. 191 00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:31,880 Sorry about that. No, it wasn't your fault, it was Harry's. 192 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,840 No, it wasn't Harry's fault either. 193 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:38,160 I can't blame him for wanting to get on, and he's doing it for me. 194 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:40,440 Why are there two cots in my room? 195 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:43,600 Oh, Mum! Don't you "Oh, Mum" me, 196 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:47,560 I bought them in case we have people to stay. 197 00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:52,960 I'm not sure we should have sneaked off like this. 198 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:55,320 We didn't sneak off, we just left, quietly. 199 00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:57,680 You sound like someone in the witness box. 200 00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,680 I might be later. 201 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:06,560 Hey, is it me, or are those two guys at the bar giving us hostile looks? 202 00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:11,360 It's you. They're just sitting there. 203 00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:13,560 I'm not so sure, Li. 204 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:17,120 Right, when I say "now", 205 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:19,560 look around suddenly and catch them at it. 206 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:21,760 Now! 207 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:25,280 You didn't look! 208 00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:26,960 There's nothing to look at. 209 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:29,560 I'm sorry to say this, Harry, but professionally 210 00:11:29,560 --> 00:11:30,800 that's a very bad call. 211 00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:33,040 If you ask me, those guys are on the prod. 212 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,880 On the prod? This isn't Dodge City. 213 00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:38,240 They're wearing cardigans. 214 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:42,080 Even ugly customers can wear cardigans, Li. 215 00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:43,720 What's the matter with you? 216 00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:47,120 Nothing, I just don't like being threatened, that's all. 217 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:49,160 I may need backup. Oh, sit down! 218 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:51,680 I'll nick you for breach of the peace in a minute. 219 00:11:51,680 --> 00:11:54,680 I think they should know they're skating on thin ice. 220 00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:56,640 And you've just fallen through it. 221 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,320 Look, I don't know what you're trying to prove... 222 00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:01,960 Prove? I'm not trying to prove anything, nothing at all. 223 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:04,360 All right, all right. 224 00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:08,000 Same again, Harry?No, thanks, I'm gonna take Sandy out for lunch. 225 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:10,360 No, I'm doing that. Now wait a minute... 226 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:13,360 I mean I'm taking all of us out to lunch, everybody. 227 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:22,000 Hey, Jean-Paul, Alistair Deacon. 228 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:25,280 Six for lunch? 1:30pm? 229 00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:28,400 Table by the window. OK. Au revoir. 230 00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:31,040 Done. 231 00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:34,920 Now...where were we? 232 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:37,880 We were talking about you trying to prove something. 233 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:40,720 It was just a phone call. 234 00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:42,520 Watch it, they're coming over. 235 00:12:49,480 --> 00:12:51,000 Oh. 236 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,160 My heart was in my mouth, then(!) 237 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:59,040 Mr Deacon, will you please leave quietly. 238 00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:01,360 No, I will not! 239 00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:03,560 You're just embarrassing everyone. 240 00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:06,880 I demand the table by the window. You're being ridiculous. 241 00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:09,040 Let's just go. Promptly if you please. 242 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:11,360 Well, I don't please. 243 00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:13,200 Louis, Gaston! 244 00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:17,800 Oh, bringing in the heavies now, are we? Let go of my lapels...! 245 00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:20,320 Ahhh! 246 00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:20,320 CRASH 247 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:25,280 I've never been so embarrassed in all my life. 248 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:28,120 All over a table, what's wrong with Alistair? 249 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:29,840 Perhaps it's being married. 250 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:33,560 Husbands have a tendency to show off in front of wives. You don't. 251 00:13:33,560 --> 00:13:37,320 I do, but it's probably so subtle you don't notice. 252 00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:40,560 Harry doesn't do things like that. Well, Harry's sensible. 253 00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:42,200 Up to a point. Up to a point. 254 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,520 I quite fancied a sandwich anyway. 255 00:13:44,520 --> 00:13:47,320 I bet the food was delicious at Jean-Paul's. 256 00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:49,920 I dare say, we didn't even get to see the menu. 257 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:52,080 Shall I take these through? Please. 258 00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:54,800 I trust his testosterone levels are down? 259 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:58,200 More or less. He's talking to Harry about taking up rugby. 260 00:13:58,200 --> 00:14:01,880 Rugby? Alistair? Well, it's not that funny. 261 00:14:01,880 --> 00:14:04,560 No, of course it's not. 262 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,480 So, why are you laughing? 263 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,640 I think it's all a bit sad. 264 00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:11,120 It's only a game, it's not an art form. 265 00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:12,800 What d'you mean "all"? 266 00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,840 Well, look at it - so far, in half a day, 267 00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:18,600 he's claimed to be under threat from the Russian Mafia, 268 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,320 acted like Billy the Kid in the pub 269 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:22,840 and then got us all chucked out of the restaurant. 270 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:25,880 It's not Alistair, is it? I mean, I know he's a bit weird... 271 00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:28,560 He is not a bit weird! Sorry. 272 00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:30,320 Do you know what I think? 273 00:14:30,320 --> 00:14:31,760 That he's gone mad? 274 00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:34,680 No, I think he's trying to prove something. 275 00:14:34,680 --> 00:14:37,160 Well, what's he trying to prove? 276 00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,760 Oh, God. 277 00:14:47,760 --> 00:14:50,800 I do wish you'd stop grumbling. 278 00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:52,600 I'm reading. 279 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:55,720 You're turning the pages in a grumpy way. 280 00:14:56,920 --> 00:15:00,280 I suppose when I go to sleep you'll accuse me of snoring grumpily. 281 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:02,400 It can be done. 282 00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:04,240 How? 283 00:15:04,240 --> 00:15:07,120 SHE SNORTS LOUDLY 284 00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:09,280 You sound like a pig rooting for truffles. 285 00:15:09,280 --> 00:15:11,840 Well, you do it, then, you're the grumpy one. 286 00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:13,960 I'm not grumpy, I'm... 287 00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:18,000 Well, let's face it, it hasn't been the best day of our lives, has it? 288 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:22,320 No, true. Then to cap it all they all have to stay here. 289 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:24,080 Haven't they got homes to go to? 290 00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:26,600 Harry and Sandy haven't, we're just looking after them 291 00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:28,000 until they find somewhere. 292 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,880 Judy and Alistair? 293 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:33,000 They just thought they would. Oh, did they? 294 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:36,400 You're not suggesting they have written invitations? 295 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:38,680 Now you're sighing grumpily. 296 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:40,120 It's not the people, 297 00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:42,920 it's the problems they bring with them. 298 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:45,600 Well, grandparents do worry. 299 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:48,120 We are not grandparents! 300 00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:51,760 You won't be happy until you get those two cots occupied, will you? 301 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:53,760 Oh, they'll be occupied, you'll see. 302 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:57,560 What will you do in the meantime, get a couple of babies out on hire? 303 00:15:58,560 --> 00:15:59,640 That's not funny. 304 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:01,680 It wasn't supposed to be. 305 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:03,400 You're obsessing. 306 00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:07,040 You really don't like babies, do you? 307 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:09,800 Not when they're young, no. 308 00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:11,240 You can't have old babies. 309 00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:13,440 You can, they're called grown-ups. 310 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:15,160 Shhh, shhh. 311 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:17,280 I wasn't saying anything. 312 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:19,240 Someone's moving about. 313 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:21,480 Probably going to the bathroom. 314 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:24,520 No, they're going downstairs. Go and have a look. 315 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:27,760 Oh, for heaven's sake! Who could be going downstairs? 316 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:31,680 Almost everyone in the world at some stage. 317 00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:33,320 You're no help, are you? 318 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:35,080 I'm doing my best. 319 00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:39,480 Is somebody up? 320 00:16:39,480 --> 00:16:42,080 Shhh, it's only me, go back to bed. 321 00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:43,960 HE SNIGGERS 322 00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:48,400 It's Judy. You made that a bit obvious. 323 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:52,360 You wanted to know who it was and I found out. 324 00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:54,480 Now she knows we know she's up. 325 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:56,440 So she does. 326 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,360 What are you doing? 327 00:16:58,360 --> 00:17:00,640 "Go back to bed," she said, so I am. 328 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:02,600 What, you're just going to lie there? 329 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:05,520 It's what I generally do in bed. Oh! 330 00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:09,000 Now, what are you doing? I'm going down to see if Judy's all right. 331 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:10,680 Of course she's all right. 332 00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:14,040 If she wasn't all right she'd have come in to see you. 333 00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:16,720 Oh, yes, I suppose so. 334 00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:19,200 So, come back to bed. 335 00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:21,560 Yes, probably best. 336 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,120 Just go and see if she's all right. 337 00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:40,560 Judy, you're here. I told Lionel to go back to bed. 338 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:43,280 He has.But you haven't? 339 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:45,200 No. 340 00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:47,920 I couldn't sleep. 341 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,960 You always used to tell me a story when I couldn't sleep. 342 00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:52,480 Which one would you like? 343 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,280 Oh, all right. 344 00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:58,960 I'm worried about Alistair. 345 00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:00,920 We're all worried about Alistair. 346 00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:04,080 You said it's as though he's trying to prove something. 347 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,120 Well, I think you're right. 348 00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:08,400 I think he is, if you see what I mean. 349 00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:14,800 Why is it that men think that women instinctively understand each other? 350 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:16,400 Because we do! 351 00:18:16,400 --> 00:18:18,520 Only I don't. 352 00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:21,800 Mum, I'd like a baby and... 353 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,840 Oh, Judy...and so would Alistair. 354 00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:26,200 But... 355 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:27,480 Oh! 356 00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:30,120 It's not me. Of course it isn't. 357 00:18:30,120 --> 00:18:32,520 Are you sure?Positive. 358 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:34,960 So, I think Alistair's blaming himself. 359 00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:36,960 So he should, it's his fault. 360 00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:38,960 No, it's not his fault. 361 00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:41,800 Maybe we're just not being lucky. 362 00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:45,360 It's just that if there is a problem I wish he'd find out. 363 00:18:45,360 --> 00:18:48,200 Instead of taking up rugby? And all the rest of it. 364 00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:51,680 He's trying to be so macho, but I think he's just in denial. 365 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:53,840 I'll get Lionel to talk to him. 366 00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:57,880 Do you think he would? He needs a man to talk to, will Lionel do it? 367 00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:00,400 Of course he will. 368 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:03,080 No! 369 00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:06,040 You haven't even thought about it. 370 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:08,200 You're just busy stuffing yourself. 371 00:19:08,200 --> 00:19:11,120 I'm not stuffing myself, I'm eating a piece of toast. 372 00:19:11,120 --> 00:19:13,040 I'm capable of eating a piece of toast 373 00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:15,520 and thinking at the same time, the answer is no. 374 00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:18,080 This all goes back to your hatred of babies. 375 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:20,240 I do not hate babies. 376 00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:22,560 I tell you what I do hate, I hate sticking my nose into 377 00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:23,720 other people's affairs. 378 00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:25,400 Well, think of it as my nose. 379 00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:28,280 Whoever's nose it is, it's still being stuck in. 380 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:32,960 And a subject like this, it's too personal. 381 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:36,800 Well, society's very open about this sort of thing these days. 382 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,200 Then get society to talk to Alistair. 383 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,320 And Alistair really respects you. 384 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:45,600 No! And Judy really loves you. No! What's that got to do with it? 385 00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:49,640 Well... Well, if you want somebody to do you a really personal favour 386 00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:52,040 then who do you ask - somebody you really love? 387 00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:55,720 Are you now claiming that this is Judy's idea? Well... 388 00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:58,720 No, I thought not. Is there any more tea in that pot? 389 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,920 I really shouldn't have asked that question, should I? 390 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,040 That was childish. Yes, it was. 391 00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:15,200 More toast? Yes, please. 392 00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:25,880 So, this is going to be my day, is it, having food thrown at me? 393 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:28,880 I'm making a casserole tonight. 394 00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:37,000 I shall look forward to that. I hope you're making a jelly, as well? 395 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,320 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 396 00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:40,840 Good. 397 00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:43,280 Very well, I'll talk to Alistair. 398 00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:45,560 Oh! Oh, you don't think that's a good idea? 399 00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:48,200 Not one of your best, no. Why not? 400 00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:50,560 Morning, Mom and Pop-in-law. 401 00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:53,840 Good morning, Alistair. Morning, Alistair, how are you today? 402 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:57,080 I feel as fit... as a mountain gorilla. 403 00:20:57,080 --> 00:20:58,720 Oh, God(!) 404 00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:01,960 I've got to go, I've got some shopping to do. 405 00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:04,280 Hey, do you need any heavy lifting? 406 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:09,120 Only croissants. No, I'll leave you two to have a man-to-man chat. 407 00:21:09,120 --> 00:21:11,960 Lionel loves man-to-man chats, don't you, Lionel? 408 00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:16,040 I never say no to a powwow with the old chief! 409 00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,880 Perhaps we can smoke a peace pipe as well. 410 00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,880 That's it, I'll see you later. Jean! What? 411 00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:24,600 Nothing. 412 00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:37,800 Isn't that great? You're still like two crazy kids in love. 413 00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:40,200 Well, the crazy bit's right. 414 00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:48,160 Oh, there you are. Morning. Good morning. Sleep well? 415 00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:51,400 Yes, thanks. It's strange being back in my old bed, though. 416 00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:54,040 Well, Harry was in the old bed too, wasn't he? 417 00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,280 Of course he was. Look, we're all right. 418 00:21:56,280 --> 00:21:58,840 Let's have some breakfast. No! No? 419 00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,320 I don't mean don't have any breakfast, I mean... 420 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:02,920 ..don't have any breakfast yet, 421 00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:06,240 because I'm going out for fresh croissants, things like that. 422 00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:08,040 Oh, all right. See you later, then. 423 00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:09,840 Aren't you coming too? 424 00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:12,560 Well, all right, if you'd like us to? 425 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:16,080 Yes. It's company, isn't it? It's more fun. 426 00:22:16,080 --> 00:22:17,720 Come on, then. 427 00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:24,080 Is it me or is she going a bit funny? 428 00:22:26,840 --> 00:22:30,280 So, Li, what are we supposed to be chatting about? 429 00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:34,000 Oh, this and that. Do you want children? 430 00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:42,000 I'll tell you something, 431 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:45,680 it's one of my greatest hopes to see you sitting there one day 432 00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:47,520 with a little me on your knee! 433 00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:49,880 Really?! 434 00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:52,880 Or a little girl me. Yes. 435 00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:55,920 Or if it were twins, you could have a little me on each knee. 436 00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:57,840 Does that answer your question? 437 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:01,240 Just one thing - aren't you jumping the gun a bit? 438 00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:03,080 Rome wasn't built in a day, Li. 439 00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:06,480 That's true. And if Judy isn't up to speed... 440 00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:11,080 Judy thinks you might be the one who isn't getting up to speed. What?! 441 00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:12,480 She told Jean. 442 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,160 But I'm Alistair Deacon! 443 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:18,320 That's as relevant as saying you're General Patton. 444 00:23:18,320 --> 00:23:20,360 'Old Blood and Guts', he was called. 445 00:23:20,360 --> 00:23:24,000 Funnily enough, it is relevant, look at all the battles he won. 446 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,200 It's not about battles, it's about... 447 00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:28,000 Well, you know what it's about. 448 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:31,400 It defies belief. Maybe it does, 449 00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:36,080 but wouldn't it be better if you could find out officially? 450 00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:37,640 Could be Judy. 451 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:40,720 She says "no", and Judy doesn't tell lies. 452 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:42,400 She has been to see somebody. 453 00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:44,560 Well, there you are, then. 454 00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:47,120 Are you saying you want me to see somebody? 455 00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:49,480 For Judy's sake. 456 00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:51,480 Me? Yes. 457 00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:53,520 Me, Alistair Deacon?! Yes. 458 00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:55,840 Alistair Deacon?! 459 00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:58,600 I wish you'd stop talking about yourself in the third person. 460 00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:00,560 It's that bizarre, Li. 461 00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:05,040 It's not bizarre, and it's not any kind of slur on your manhood. 462 00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:07,840 It's just the sensible thing to do. 463 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:09,920 You mean, you did it? 464 00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:12,560 No, but just take my word for it. 465 00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:14,200 For Judy. 466 00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:18,480 All right, I'll do it, I'll phone a guy who might know a guy. 467 00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:20,520 That's the spirit. 468 00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:23,440 Me, Alistair Deacon?! 469 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:26,440 You'll come with me, won't you? 470 00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:31,320 Doctor who? 471 00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:34,240 ..Plonk! 472 00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:36,320 Oh, Plank. 473 00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:39,680 With an A. And an extra K? 474 00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:44,240 Yes, Dr Plankk as in thick as two short ones, with an extra K. 475 00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:47,800 Yes, well, I'm sure he is. 476 00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:49,800 Thanks a bunch. 477 00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:51,120 When?! 478 00:24:51,120 --> 00:24:52,320 That soon?! 479 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:55,680 Me?! 480 00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:58,520 No way, Jose. 481 00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:01,360 This is for a friend of mine. 482 00:25:01,360 --> 00:25:04,480 Name? Er, Hardcastle. 483 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,960 I'll just be going along for moral support. Yeah. 484 00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:13,000 OK, thanks again, Max. Ciao. 485 00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:16,320 I overslept. 486 00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:19,160 You weren't sick when you got up this morning, were you? 487 00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:20,880 No, I wasn't sick. 488 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,360 Who were you phoning? 489 00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:25,040 Oh, just a business associate. 490 00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:30,880 Look, Judy, I had a word with Lionel this morning. 491 00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:33,000 Oh. About a little Alistair Junior, 492 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,720 or rather the lack of little Alistair Junior, 493 00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:39,240 real mano-a-mano stuff, no punches pulled. 494 00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:41,160 Any conclusions? 495 00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:42,680 Oh, yes. 496 00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:46,600 For an old bull elephant, Lionel can be very indirect sometimes 497 00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:50,600 but I seized the initiative and I fixed myself up with a consultant. 498 00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:52,000 It'll just be a formality, 499 00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:54,120 but I thought it was the best thing to do. 500 00:25:54,120 --> 00:25:56,440 Oh, thank you, Alistair. Oh. 501 00:25:56,440 --> 00:25:57,680 Oh. Oh! 502 00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:02,040 You're not nervous, are you? 503 00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:03,600 Nervous?! 504 00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:08,440 Oh, Judy, nervous is not a word in my vocabulary. 505 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:15,200 Result? 506 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,640 Total embarrassment on my part. 507 00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,280 Did you win? If you want to put it like that. 508 00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:23,520 Alistair agreed to talk to a guy who might know a guy. 509 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:25,680 Oh, you are clever. 510 00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:28,120 If I were clever I'd have stayed right out of it. 511 00:26:28,120 --> 00:26:30,520 Good, that's one down, one to go. 512 00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:33,640 What do you mean? Harry. 513 00:26:33,640 --> 00:26:34,920 What about Harry? 514 00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:37,000 We were just saying how well he looks. 515 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:38,760 And how we need to change his mind 516 00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:41,440 about the armed response business. No, we don't. 517 00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:43,440 Look, I know it's well intended, 518 00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,840 but at the end of the day it's Harry's decision.What is? 519 00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:49,800 Oh, I do wish people would stop appearing from nowhere. 520 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:53,480 I just brought the croissants and if the decision you're talking about 521 00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:54,800 is the one I think it is, 522 00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:57,240 I don't see why it's suddenly in the public domain. 523 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:01,000 We're not the public, and we care about you.Which is kind but... 524 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,200 But it's our business. 525 00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:06,440 Fine, fine, fine. Oh, Jean! 526 00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:07,480 Jean! 527 00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:10,560 Funny, isn't it? 528 00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:12,800 I'm supposed to keep the peace! 529 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:16,440 Well, look on the bright side, there's been no actual violence. 530 00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:19,640 Croissant? No, thanks. What if I were a tightrope walker? 531 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,080 That requires a stretch of the imagination. 532 00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:25,280 What if I were? It would simply be what I did for a living, 533 00:27:25,280 --> 00:27:26,640 it would just be my job. 534 00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:29,680 When you were in Korea, you were just doing your job. 535 00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,280 I know, but I didn't volunteer for it. 536 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:34,360 It's Sandy, you see. 537 00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:36,880 Every time I look at her sleeping beside me, 538 00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:38,440 I have the same thought... 539 00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:41,040 ..the thought that I want to look after her, 540 00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:42,720 give her the very best life I can. 541 00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:44,200 Of course you do. 542 00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:47,640 And if armed response is a way of doing it, then... 543 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:49,400 Tell me I've got a point? 544 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:51,160 My guy knew a guy, Li. 545 00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:53,480 The appointment's on Tuesday morning. 546 00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:56,720 Jolly good.That's when I go in front of the police board. 547 00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,360 It's going to be quite a day, isn't it? 548 00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:04,480 Good morning. 549 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:08,760 Oh, dear. 550 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:10,400 Where are you going? 551 00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:13,840 Oh, nowhere special. Now? 552 00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:16,040 Seems as good a time as any. 553 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:18,360 I thought you might stay and cheer us up. 554 00:28:18,360 --> 00:28:21,320 By the look of you three there's not much chance of that. 555 00:28:22,840 --> 00:28:24,400 Hello, mate. 556 00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:26,000 Get off. 557 00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:30,320 Today's the day, Li. 558 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:31,840 Judy. 559 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:37,600 Sandy? 560 00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:41,840 Jean? 561 00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:47,440 Shall I get some people in off the street and you can start on them? 562 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:49,360 That's very unfeeling, Lionel. 563 00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:52,440 I'm just trying to introduce a note of realism, that's all. 564 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:54,840 It's not the end of civilisation as we know it. 565 00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:57,160 It's a job interview and a doctor's appointment. 566 00:28:57,160 --> 00:28:59,880 Which could leave Judy childless and Sandy a widow. 567 00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:04,360 Now look what you've done. 568 00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:09,040 I shouldn't have got up this morning. 569 00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:11,360 Right, I'm off now. 570 00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:14,000 You're not hugging everybody first, are you? 571 00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:16,840 Only me.Bye, then. ALL: Bye. 572 00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:19,280 Good luck with the old... 573 00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:19,280 HE IMITATES MACHINE GUN 574 00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:25,400 It was a joke. I... 575 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:28,800 And I thought Lionel was the master of insensitivity. 576 00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:35,240 Look, Sandy... 577 00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:36,800 No, I mean it. 578 00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:39,920 I know you're doing it for me. I just wish... 579 00:29:39,920 --> 00:29:41,800 I'm just trying to get promoted. 580 00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:45,120 It's what any bloke tries for, even Alistair. No. 581 00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:47,320 I think Alistair was born promoted. 582 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:49,280 Well, most blokes, then. 583 00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:53,400 It's not as dangerous as you think, I promise. Off you go, then. 584 00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:56,720 And make sure you come back as something very senior. 585 00:29:56,720 --> 00:29:59,160 Chief Constable, probably. 586 00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:01,880 I'll see you later. Yeah. 587 00:30:09,160 --> 00:30:11,120 Let's have a cup of tea and a chat. 588 00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:12,960 I'll just settle for a cup of tea. 589 00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:16,080 Now, what time are you two making a move? 590 00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:18,120 About now, I should think. 591 00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:21,320 Doesn't the old clock go round? They usually do. 592 00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:24,600 You're all right? Me? 593 00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:26,760 Oh, I'm cool. 594 00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:29,440 Apart from a slight numbness in the left leg. 595 00:30:29,440 --> 00:30:31,880 Come on, Alistair. OK, Li. 596 00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:36,160 Oh, and...thanks again for volunteering to come with me. 597 00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:37,840 Good luck. 598 00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:39,360 Oh... 599 00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:43,520 I'll be thinking of you. So shall I. 600 00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:45,040 Of you, I mean. 601 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:56,080 I see Mafeking's been relieved. 602 00:30:56,080 --> 00:30:57,520 Really? 603 00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:14,000 Don't even think about it! 604 00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:19,760 There is a prob with all this. 605 00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:21,480 It's called fear. 606 00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:23,520 No, I mean my actually being here. 607 00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:27,560 See, if word ever got out, I'd lose my street cred, you know that? 608 00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:29,480 Look, you're doing an honest thing. 609 00:31:29,480 --> 00:31:32,640 I've always thought that was good for one's self-respect. 610 00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:37,600 You're right. You've got street cred, you know? 611 00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:40,200 I shall treasure it. 612 00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:43,200 I'm sure Dr Plankk is very discreet. 613 00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,720 I'm sure he is. 614 00:31:44,720 --> 00:31:46,800 Dr Plankk?! 615 00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:49,440 He's Austrian. Frank Plankk. 616 00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:51,400 With two Ks. 617 00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:53,960 In Frank or Plank? 618 00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:55,720 Plankk. 619 00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:57,200 Mr Blakesley? 620 00:31:57,200 --> 00:31:59,160 I think he lost his nerve. 621 00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:01,480 Why are men such babies? 622 00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:02,760 Mr Hardcastle, then. 623 00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:05,040 I'm Mr Hardcastle. 624 00:32:05,040 --> 00:32:06,440 Really? 625 00:32:06,440 --> 00:32:08,720 Yes, really. 626 00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:11,760 Would you fill in this form for the doctor? 627 00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:13,600 Me?! 628 00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,640 Just a few personal details. 629 00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:22,200 There seems to have been some mistake. 630 00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,800 The appointment was in the name of Hardcastle. 631 00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:26,480 That would be my secretary. 632 00:32:26,480 --> 00:32:29,440 What would you do with women? 633 00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:32,080 Anyway, it's me the doctor wants to see. 634 00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,880 Sorry, Li, street cred. 635 00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:35,600 Just fill in the form. 636 00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:39,400 Oh, erm... 637 00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:42,360 Where it says name...? 638 00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:45,160 Funnily enough, you write your name. 639 00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:47,440 I couldn't just put "Mr X", could I? 640 00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:52,560 Come on. 641 00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,000 Where? For a walk. 642 00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:56,960 We can't just sit around like the Trojan women all day. 643 00:32:56,960 --> 00:33:00,480 They were all widowed, weren't they? Some other women, then. 644 00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:02,360 Someone might be back soon. 645 00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:03,800 Bound to be. 646 00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:07,840 Oh! All right. Well, let's watch television. 647 00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,120 There's always a film on in the afternoons. 648 00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:13,200 Lionel always drops off during the film in the afternoons. 649 00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:15,960 There you are, you see? Charge Of The Light Brigade. 650 00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:17,960 Hundreds of people were killed in that. 651 00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:19,920 We've got to do something. 652 00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:22,520 Why? To make the time go quicker. 653 00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,280 What about a game of Scrabble? 654 00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:25,800 Mum! 655 00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:29,760 Oh, well, I'm going for a walk. 656 00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:32,640 You might miss someone. Oh! 657 00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:34,280 I suppose so. 658 00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:36,320 We'll just have to wait, then. 659 00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:39,120 That's what we were doing. Is anybody hungry? 660 00:33:39,120 --> 00:33:40,680 I couldn't eat a thing. 661 00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:42,520 Oh, Sandy, you must stop worrying. 662 00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:45,520 I suppose you didn't worry when Lionel went off to Korea. 663 00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:47,480 Of course I did. I was a nervous wreck. 664 00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:49,760 It's a wonder I didn't kill all my patients. 665 00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:53,000 I kept praying he would just get shot in the leg and sent home. 666 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:55,520 Perhaps Harry will only get shot in the leg! 667 00:33:57,320 --> 00:33:59,520 Has anyone considered the possibility 668 00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:01,360 that he might not get shot at all? 669 00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:03,240 Yes, of course I have. 670 00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:05,760 After all, Lionel went through a whole war 671 00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:07,080 and the only injury he got 672 00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:09,440 was being kicked in the head by an enemy mule. 673 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:12,920 I don't suppose the poor thing even knew which side he was on. 674 00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:14,680 Lionel? 675 00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:16,240 No, the mule. 676 00:34:17,480 --> 00:34:20,120 I know one thing, if Harry gets this job, 677 00:34:20,120 --> 00:34:23,200 it's going to be ever so hard to look cheerful about it. 678 00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,880 Well, why try? Because I love him. 679 00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:34,320 POLICE SIRENS WAIL 680 00:34:44,240 --> 00:34:46,160 Oh, it's you. 681 00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:47,880 I've had warmer welcomes. 682 00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:49,720 It's only Lionel. 683 00:34:49,720 --> 00:34:51,120 There's no need to gush. 684 00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:54,880 What have you done with Alistair? Nothing. He's still there. 685 00:34:54,880 --> 00:34:56,560 They haven't kept him in, have they? 686 00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:59,400 It's a surgery, not a hospital 687 00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:02,880 He insisted on waiting until they get the lab results. 688 00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:06,120 He said he wanted to be on his own when he gets them. 689 00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:07,800 Something about personal cred. 690 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:11,040 What does that mean? God knows! 691 00:35:11,040 --> 00:35:13,280 What about Harry? He's not back yet. 692 00:35:13,280 --> 00:35:14,880 Oh. 693 00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:17,280 Well, I'm going to get something to eat. 694 00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:18,640 Now? 695 00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:22,240 Yes. Now. 696 00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:31,160 How can you eat at a time like this? 697 00:35:31,160 --> 00:35:34,920 First of all, I put the food in my mouth... Don't be juvenile. 698 00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:36,560 Juvenile? 699 00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:40,680 My only excuse is that I spent the best part of the morning with one. 700 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:44,120 Everyone else has the decency to worry about Alistair and Harry. 701 00:35:44,120 --> 00:35:47,000 I'm not indecent, I'm just hungry. 702 00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:49,000 Is that a jam sandwich you're making? 703 00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,240 Yes. You're regressing. 704 00:35:51,240 --> 00:35:54,360 If I were really regressing, we'd be upstairs in bed. 705 00:35:55,960 --> 00:35:57,640 Oh, now that's sweet. 706 00:35:57,640 --> 00:36:00,600 Good. Now can I get on with my sandwich? 707 00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:02,920 Would you like a cup of tea? Yes, please. 708 00:36:02,920 --> 00:36:05,920 Would you like a jam sandwich? No, thank you. 709 00:36:05,920 --> 00:36:09,160 I suppose we were passionate once, weren't we? 710 00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:11,600 In a quiet sort of way, yes. 711 00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:13,280 May I come in? 712 00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:15,320 Why on earth did you knock? 713 00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:17,400 I thought perhaps you wanted to be alone. 714 00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:20,640 We're just making a jam sandwich and a cup of tea. 715 00:36:20,640 --> 00:36:23,360 A jam sandwich? Mm. 716 00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:25,840 No, I thought that perhaps you'd had enough 717 00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:27,920 of everyone else's problems for one day. 718 00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:30,480 Well, to tell the truth... Of course, we haven't! 719 00:36:31,720 --> 00:36:33,680 We're a family, 720 00:36:33,680 --> 00:36:37,600 a pretty dysfunctional one at the moment but still a family, 721 00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:39,600 and you're part of it, so there. 722 00:36:39,600 --> 00:36:41,560 I've got something to tell you. 723 00:36:41,560 --> 00:36:44,080 I didn't hear the phone. It's not about Harry. 724 00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:46,400 Well, it is about Harry. 725 00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:48,400 And me. 726 00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:49,680 I'm pregnant. 727 00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:53,320 Oh, Sandy! 728 00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:55,200 How wonderful! 729 00:36:55,200 --> 00:36:56,760 Congratulations! 730 00:36:56,760 --> 00:36:58,720 You can't shake hands! 731 00:36:59,840 --> 00:37:01,360 Sorry. 732 00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:04,440 A baby! A grandchild! Not strictly speaking. 733 00:37:04,440 --> 00:37:06,120 Oh, don't be so pedantic. 734 00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:08,520 When did you know? Just before we came home. 735 00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:10,080 Why didn't you tell us before? 736 00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:13,040 Because, well, because other things came up I suppose. 737 00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:15,480 Harry's job. Yes. 738 00:37:15,480 --> 00:37:17,920 Generally speaking, I try to stay neutral. 739 00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:19,040 Quite successfully. 740 00:37:19,040 --> 00:37:22,600 But this time... I like Harry, he's a good lad, 741 00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:25,720 but how he could apply for a job which worries you so much, 742 00:37:25,720 --> 00:37:27,800 with you just pregnant, is beyond me! 743 00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:31,440 Quite right. But he didn't know. He doesn't know. I haven't told him. 744 00:37:31,440 --> 00:37:32,760 What?! 745 00:37:32,760 --> 00:37:34,920 Not yet anyway. 746 00:37:34,920 --> 00:37:36,640 But he's the father. 747 00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:39,480 Isn't he? 748 00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:42,800 Well, of course he is! 749 00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:45,200 Of course he is! 750 00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:47,160 Well, why didn't you tell him? 751 00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:51,000 Because he applied for the job just before I found out I was pregnant, 752 00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:54,120 and if I'd have told him then... Don't you see? 753 00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:57,840 I'd be saying, "Don't try and get on because I'm going to have a baby." 754 00:37:57,840 --> 00:37:59,520 How unfair would that have been? 755 00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:02,320 I'd have told him if I was going to have a baby. So would I. 756 00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:06,680 It's hard to think of you being pregnant, Lionel. 757 00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:08,160 I don't know how you can joke. 758 00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:11,320 Because I feel so much better now I've told you two. 759 00:38:11,320 --> 00:38:14,560 And we're still going to have a baby, whatever happens. 760 00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:17,840 Sandy. Look, there isn't a but or anything, I'll tell him soon. 761 00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:20,600 Harry's back. What? 762 00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:23,400 Now, I think we should leave them alone. 763 00:38:23,400 --> 00:38:25,480 Yes. 764 00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:29,600 Well, look, if Mum's going. 765 00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:32,240 Come on! 766 00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:36,760 Why does everything in this house turn into a rally? 767 00:38:40,720 --> 00:38:42,720 I seem to have drawn a crowd. 768 00:38:42,720 --> 00:38:45,640 Sorry, Harry, look everyone... It doesn't matter. 769 00:38:45,640 --> 00:38:47,680 You'll all know sooner or later. 770 00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:49,760 Well, what happened? 771 00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:52,040 They turned me down. Oh, Harry. 772 00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:53,560 Oh, well done, Harry. 773 00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:57,000 No, they turned me down. 774 00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,160 I mean, well done for trying. 775 00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:02,560 Never mind, Harry.Well, Sandy's happy, that's the main thing. 776 00:39:02,560 --> 00:39:06,280 I am. I'm sorry, but I am. You all right? 777 00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:11,280 Yes, I'm fine. Thinking of applying for the vice squad next. 778 00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:13,080 I'm joking. I'm joking. 779 00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:15,240 So why did they turn you down? 780 00:39:15,240 --> 00:39:17,960 Why? They weren't very specific. 781 00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:20,520 I suppose you don't have to be specific if you have got 782 00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:23,840 silver braid all over your hat, they just said I was unsuitable. 783 00:39:23,840 --> 00:39:26,720 Unsuitable? What a thing to say! 784 00:39:26,720 --> 00:39:28,560 You should have made them be specific. 785 00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:29,760 You should have made them. 786 00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:32,000 You didn't want him to get the job in the fist place! 787 00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:36,800 I know, but I thought they would be better judges than that. Fools! 788 00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:40,760 Don't try, don't try. 789 00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:40,760 DOORBELL RINGS 790 00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,120 That will be Alistair. 791 00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:44,680 Had any lunch, Harry?No. 792 00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:47,080 There's a jam sandwich in the kitchen. 793 00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:50,000 Yes, Sandy, go and help Harry eat the jam sandwich. 794 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:52,840 I don't really fancy... Good idea. Come on, Harry. 795 00:39:54,320 --> 00:39:56,560 Harry, how did the interview go? 796 00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:59,600 I failed. Way to go, way to go. 797 00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:01,440 You're looking chipper, Alistair. 798 00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:04,160 I'm a rampant lion. 799 00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:07,120 Rampant.Does this mean that everything's all right? 800 00:40:07,120 --> 00:40:09,800 As in all cannons firing? 801 00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:11,680 I'm so relieved. 802 00:40:11,680 --> 00:40:15,080 So there's absolutely no reason why we can't have children? 803 00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:17,200 Was there ever any doubt? 804 00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:20,800 By the colour of your face in that waiting room, yes, there was. 805 00:40:20,800 --> 00:40:23,600 Must have been the lighting. Mr Blakesley came back by the way. 806 00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:26,760 His wife brought him. Who's Mr Blakesley? 807 00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:30,080 Someone else who was a funny colour because of the lights. 808 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:32,000 What did the doctor say? 809 00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:36,720 He said, "You and your frau must not get tight-up." 810 00:40:36,720 --> 00:40:40,400 Think he must have meant uptight. Yes, his English wasn't brilliant. 811 00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:43,360 What it actually meant was, just relax and it will happen. 812 00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:45,440 Oh! Thank goodness. 813 00:40:45,440 --> 00:40:48,160 Well, you two have had quite a day of it. 814 00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:50,920 Why don't you take Judy home and just relax? 815 00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:52,920 JUDY MOUTHS: Mum! 816 00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:57,680 What?! You're determined to get those cots occupied, aren't you? 817 00:40:57,680 --> 00:40:59,360 Oh, do give me some credit. 818 00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:02,280 I really did mean relax. You know, have a lie down. 819 00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:05,720 It's no better, is it? 820 00:41:05,720 --> 00:41:09,680 Cots? What cots?I'll tell you on the way home. Come on. 821 00:41:09,680 --> 00:41:12,240 You won't be slipping into something ridiculous, will you? 822 00:41:12,240 --> 00:41:16,040 No, I won't. Got quite a lot of ironing to do. Oh. 823 00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:17,840 I always put off ironing. 824 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:21,320 You're my kind of lady, you know that? 825 00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:24,320 See you later, folks-in-law. Bye, Alistair. 826 00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:27,480 I'm always putting off ironing. 827 00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,240 SHE MOUTHS: I am. 828 00:41:29,240 --> 00:41:31,840 I'm going to be a dad! I'm gonna be a dad. 829 00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:35,920 Harry, Harry, that is wonderful news! 830 00:41:35,920 --> 00:41:37,280 Ace, mate, ace! 831 00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:41,040 We'll call you later. We've got some rather serious ironing to do. 832 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:45,320 I'm going to be a dad. 833 00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:49,000 My Sandy, a mother. Would you like a brandy? 834 00:41:49,000 --> 00:41:50,240 No, I'm fine. 835 00:41:50,240 --> 00:41:53,160 I love kids, you know. Well, you should have a lot more. 836 00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:55,920 Let them have this one first. 837 00:41:55,920 --> 00:41:57,440 Just a minute. 838 00:41:57,440 --> 00:41:59,560 You two don't seem surprised. 839 00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:01,640 Sandy didn't tell you first, did she? 840 00:42:01,640 --> 00:42:04,240 No. No-no, no, of course not. 841 00:42:04,240 --> 00:42:05,920 I just sensed it. 842 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:08,000 Did you sense it as well, Lionel? 843 00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:12,440 No, but Jean told me she did and I always believe everything she says. 844 00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:14,560 Right. Harry, I ought to tell you... 845 00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:17,000 Harry just asked us whether we knew about the baby. 846 00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,160 I said, "Of course not. We sensed it." 847 00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:22,440 Isn't that remarkable? Remarkable. 848 00:42:22,440 --> 00:42:24,760 Don't you think women are remarkable, Lionel? 849 00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:26,240 Every day. 850 00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:29,600 We ought to celebrate. What shall we do? 851 00:42:29,600 --> 00:42:32,520 We could go back to the restaurant we got chucked out of. 852 00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:36,040 We could do something this evening. Now, I'd like to go for a walk. 853 00:42:36,040 --> 00:42:38,000 Oh, yes, let's. Come on, Lionel. 854 00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:40,400 I really meant just me and Harry. 855 00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:41,920 Of course you did. 856 00:42:41,920 --> 00:42:44,080 I'll just pop upstairs. 857 00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:45,840 Don't run. 858 00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:49,360 I don't suppose losing the job seems so important now, does it? 859 00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:52,560 Insignificant. I'm still surprised they turned you down. 860 00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:54,440 I don't think they did. What? 861 00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:56,760 I think Harry turned them down. 862 00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:58,680 How did you know? 863 00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:01,200 Everyone was so busy being relieved 864 00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:05,000 that they failed to notice you didn't look disappointed enough. 865 00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:06,920 I just couldn't do it. 866 00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,000 I know how much Sandy hated the idea, but she never nagged, 867 00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:14,200 she didn't even tell me about the baby, although she must have known. 868 00:43:14,200 --> 00:43:17,360 You're a lucky man, Harry. I know that. And a good man. 869 00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:20,360 You did the right thing. You'll get your promotion some other way. 870 00:43:20,360 --> 00:43:21,720 I hope so. 871 00:43:21,720 --> 00:43:23,160 See you both later, then. 872 00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:25,000 Bye. Bye. 873 00:43:27,760 --> 00:43:30,760 Fancy you working that one out. 874 00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:33,080 You're much cleverer than you look, you know. 875 00:43:34,400 --> 00:43:36,600 That's not difficult. 876 00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:39,120 They're going to be all right, those two. 877 00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:42,560 I wonder will baby Alistair get on with baby Harry? 878 00:43:42,560 --> 00:43:45,600 If they're like the grown-up versions, I rather doubt it. 879 00:43:45,600 --> 00:43:48,800 Now, can we please talk about something other than babies? 880 00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:52,160 Oh, yes, of course. Oh, that's nice. 881 00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:54,720 Yes, it is. 882 00:43:54,720 --> 00:43:58,120 Why did you and Margaret never have any children? Oh, God. 883 00:43:58,120 --> 00:44:00,160 I just wondered. 884 00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:02,600 Oh, all right... 885 00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:06,000 Margaret wasn't what you would call the maternal sort. 886 00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:09,480 She claimed that children affected her sinuses. 887 00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:11,440 She had a cat. 888 00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:14,520 So she denied you the children you always wanted? 889 00:44:14,520 --> 00:44:17,040 I wouldn't put it quite like that. 890 00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:21,200 I suppose that if one or two had happened along the way, 891 00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:23,600 well, I wouldn't have said no. 892 00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:25,640 If one or two had happened along the way, 893 00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:28,080 you wouldn't have been able to say no. True. 894 00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,520 Oh, don't be sad. 895 00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:37,840 How can I be sad when I've got all I ever wanted beside me? Oh. 896 00:44:37,840 --> 00:44:39,880 DOORBELL RINGS 897 00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:43,040 Why do doorbells always do that? 898 00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:44,960 People push them, I suppose. 899 00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:53,960 Good afternoon. Good afternoon. 900 00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:57,160 Is this the home of Lionel Hardcastle? 901 00:44:57,160 --> 00:44:59,520 Yes, it is. 902 00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:02,080 I have come a very long way to see him. 903 00:45:02,080 --> 00:45:03,400 Really? 904 00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:05,240 From Kenya. 905 00:45:05,240 --> 00:45:10,360 But that journey is now worthwhile because I have found my father. 906 00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:16,560 Lionel? 907 00:45:18,520 --> 00:45:20,280 Lionel? 908 00:45:27,800 --> 00:45:30,720 909 00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:33,320 910 00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:36,360 911 00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:42,320 912 00:45:42,320 --> 00:45:45,040 913 00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:52,280 914 00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:55,040 915 00:45:55,040 --> 00:45:57,960 916 00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:04,640 welcome lovers... 917 00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:14,040