1 00:01:09,166 --> 00:01:10,125 Good. 2 00:03:11,166 --> 00:03:17,708 I can't even taste my own tears 3 00:03:18,583 --> 00:03:20,458 They fall into 4 00:03:20,541 --> 00:03:26,583 An even sadder bastard's eyes 5 00:03:27,500 --> 00:03:34,333 Yeah, I'm… I'm a TV on the road 6 00:03:36,625 --> 00:03:43,625 Yeah, I'm… I'm getting up to leave 7 00:03:47,041 --> 00:03:51,125 You don't know what it means to me that you've all welcomed me into your family, 8 00:03:51,208 --> 00:03:55,708 and I just want to say thank you. 9 00:03:55,791 --> 00:03:57,166 And, um… 10 00:03:58,250 --> 00:04:00,916 Nothing. I just… I hope you can forgive me. 11 00:04:04,958 --> 00:04:07,625 I don't really play with toys like this anymore. 12 00:04:07,708 --> 00:04:10,666 I want a video camera. A nice one. 13 00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:15,041 Oh, well, I don't… It was just more of a… a gesture. 14 00:04:16,583 --> 00:04:18,125 Write it in a card instead. 15 00:04:19,708 --> 00:04:22,000 That's actually a good idea. 16 00:04:22,083 --> 00:04:24,541 There's card stock in the junk drawer. 17 00:04:32,083 --> 00:04:33,000 Thanks. 18 00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:15,250 Sorry, ma'am. 19 00:05:15,333 --> 00:05:16,916 Holy fuck! 20 00:05:26,833 --> 00:05:29,291 Hi. Who are you talking to? 21 00:05:29,375 --> 00:05:32,541 I'm just on hold with, um, neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins. 22 00:05:32,625 --> 00:05:34,875 I talked to this guy at UCSF. He was, like, a total dick. 23 00:05:34,958 --> 00:05:37,708 But there's this world-renowned surgeon in Paris I'm gonna try next. 24 00:05:37,791 --> 00:05:39,833 -He's done promising new research. -Why? 25 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,208 To help my mom. 26 00:05:42,291 --> 00:05:44,125 Honey, I don't think she's looking for help. 27 00:05:44,208 --> 00:05:46,416 You know what I realized? It's a brain tumor. 28 00:05:46,500 --> 00:05:50,500 You know, I think the tumor, it's, like, messing with her head. 29 00:05:50,583 --> 00:05:52,750 It's, uh… it's, like, clouding her judgment. 30 00:05:53,333 --> 00:05:55,666 You know, I just… It makes total sense. 31 00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:57,250 You know, she's doing fine. 32 00:05:57,333 --> 00:05:59,000 She seems like herself, 33 00:05:59,083 --> 00:06:02,708 except for this one insane decision she's made, and I just… 34 00:06:06,791 --> 00:06:08,375 She doesn't need to die. 35 00:06:09,291 --> 00:06:12,208 She needs the best neurosurgeon in the world. 36 00:06:12,291 --> 00:06:14,791 And I don't know why Jules isn't calling everyone he knows. 37 00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,291 Actually, he might know someone who knows this doctor at Sinai. 38 00:06:17,375 --> 00:06:19,958 -Take a shower and get dressed. -I'm in the middle of something. 39 00:06:20,041 --> 00:06:21,333 -This is important! -Nicky. 40 00:06:21,416 --> 00:06:23,375 This is the most important thing to me. 41 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,250 Let's postpone the wedding. 42 00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:31,375 Are you serious? 43 00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:34,416 No, so you can focus on the most important thing to you. 44 00:06:35,041 --> 00:06:36,916 I didn't mean it like that. I… 45 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:40,750 I don't mean it like that either. I mean that your mom dropped a huge bomb on you, 46 00:06:40,833 --> 00:06:44,375 and yeah, it is more important than the wedding. And… 47 00:06:45,875 --> 00:06:50,375 I don't know. Maybe we don't want to get married under these circumstances. 48 00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:57,500 Come here. 49 00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:10,500 Who's that? 50 00:07:11,291 --> 00:07:12,458 Mmm? 51 00:07:12,541 --> 00:07:14,166 Who's that little guy? 52 00:07:14,666 --> 00:07:16,416 Oh… 53 00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:23,250 This is my dumb apology for, like, tactlessly unearthing your family secret. 54 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:28,125 We can have the wedding as planned this week. 55 00:07:28,208 --> 00:07:30,541 This doesn't change anything for us. 56 00:07:31,041 --> 00:07:31,958 Yeah. 57 00:07:33,958 --> 00:07:35,458 But it does, like… 58 00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:39,000 It does change a lot. 59 00:07:41,250 --> 00:07:43,541 I'm not gonna let it get in the way of our wedding. 60 00:07:47,416 --> 00:07:48,416 I'm with you. 61 00:07:50,541 --> 00:07:52,416 -Really? -Mm-hmm. I'm with you. 62 00:07:52,916 --> 00:07:54,125 4ever? 63 00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:55,166 4ever. 64 00:07:57,541 --> 00:07:58,625 -What? -Oh! Portia! 65 00:07:58,708 --> 00:08:00,708 Where's the dress? It needs to be altered. 66 00:08:00,791 --> 00:08:03,333 I have 500 things I have to do. Nicky, stop touching her! 67 00:08:03,416 --> 00:08:05,250 The table man delivered eight tables-- 68 00:08:05,333 --> 00:08:06,541 -Nicky, stop. Ew! -I'm helping. 69 00:08:06,625 --> 00:08:09,458 -The caterer needs the menu finalized. -Okay, let me help you. 70 00:08:10,458 --> 00:08:11,291 What? 71 00:08:11,875 --> 00:08:12,833 Let me help you. 72 00:08:13,666 --> 00:08:15,083 The dress is in there. 73 00:08:15,166 --> 00:08:17,333 Nicky's suit is in there. What else do you need? 74 00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:21,916 By the way, I haven't gotten to say thank you, Portia, for-- 75 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,666 I saw your cake. 76 00:08:23,750 --> 00:08:25,416 -Oh, yeah. -And I read your card. 77 00:08:26,166 --> 00:08:28,375 You know what's weird? I have to ask you something. 78 00:08:28,458 --> 00:08:30,750 You thought we were gonna kill you? 79 00:08:31,333 --> 00:08:34,000 No offense, but that's kind of an insane conclusion to draw. 80 00:08:34,083 --> 00:08:36,125 Did someone try to kill you once or something? 81 00:08:36,208 --> 00:08:38,875 -No. No. -Then why did you think that? 82 00:08:38,958 --> 00:08:41,166 It's just how my brain works. 83 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:50,125 Like, right now, I… I feel like there's someone standing behind this door. 84 00:09:01,833 --> 00:09:03,500 I googled you, you know. 85 00:09:04,250 --> 00:09:05,875 It's like you don't even exist. 86 00:09:08,750 --> 00:09:12,041 No social media, no LinkedIn, not even, like, high school sports stats. 87 00:09:12,125 --> 00:09:14,125 Either you didn't play sports, or you weren't good. 88 00:09:14,208 --> 00:09:15,750 I was homeschooled, actually. 89 00:09:15,833 --> 00:09:19,958 So I played the sport of, like, trying not to be a total freak. 90 00:09:20,041 --> 00:09:22,208 But I don't think that it worked. 91 00:09:22,291 --> 00:09:24,541 Yeah, I'm like the opposite. 92 00:09:24,625 --> 00:09:26,625 I never thought anyone was trying to kill me. 93 00:09:33,041 --> 00:09:36,125 -Whoa, when did all this happen? -Hey. Hey. 94 00:09:36,208 --> 00:09:39,958 What is this? It's supposed to be live-edge cedar. 95 00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:41,250 These are like sticks. 96 00:09:41,333 --> 00:09:44,416 This is a tasteful wedding, not the Blair Witch Project. 97 00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:46,666 This is what you ordered. Rustic beechwood. 98 00:09:46,750 --> 00:09:48,291 Rustic beechwood. 99 00:09:48,375 --> 00:09:50,791 Look around you, man. I don't see a fucking beach. Um… 100 00:09:50,875 --> 00:09:53,791 The wedding theme is forest of love. Could I talk to Dominick? 101 00:09:53,875 --> 00:09:56,708 He doesn't do consults after his work's been approved. You approved. 102 00:09:56,791 --> 00:09:59,583 Well, no, I didn't approve this. This is not my vision. 103 00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:01,708 Hey, Portia. Come here. Look. 104 00:10:01,791 --> 00:10:05,083 I… I think that this… this is actually gonna look really nice. 105 00:10:05,166 --> 00:10:06,375 -No. -Yeah, it is. It is. 106 00:10:06,458 --> 00:10:08,208 They're gonna do that thing here. 107 00:10:08,291 --> 00:10:10,666 And I think, I mean, they have a plan. You guys have a plan. 108 00:10:10,750 --> 00:10:11,916 Of course we have a plan. 109 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,708 This stick goes there, that stick goes there. 110 00:10:13,791 --> 00:10:15,916 -I'm not tipping him. -It makes an arch. 111 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:19,166 Portia, I think the flowers look really nice. 112 00:10:19,250 --> 00:10:22,833 -I think that's gonna look nice too-- -These aren't the flowers, Rachel. 113 00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:25,541 Mmm… What? 114 00:10:26,166 --> 00:10:29,250 Well, they're fake. They're fake. The real ones come day of. 115 00:10:29,333 --> 00:10:31,625 What? Portia, that's crazy. 116 00:10:32,375 --> 00:10:34,041 These are… these are perfectly arranged. 117 00:10:34,125 --> 00:10:36,000 They're ready to go. Why don't we just use these? 118 00:10:37,750 --> 00:10:40,416 We obviously need real flowers, Rachel. 119 00:10:40,500 --> 00:10:42,875 Do you want your wedding to look like a hospital waiting room? 120 00:10:42,958 --> 00:10:46,166 God, I did this arrangement in advance so I could actually see it. 121 00:10:46,250 --> 00:10:49,166 We've always envisioned a winter wedding at Somerhouse. 122 00:10:49,250 --> 00:10:50,875 Went back and forth about the color scheme. 123 00:10:50,958 --> 00:10:52,458 Rust, sage, evergreen, and white. 124 00:10:52,541 --> 00:10:56,291 But there is just too much rust and not enough sage. Here, take these. 125 00:10:57,333 --> 00:10:59,041 I think it's… 126 00:10:59,666 --> 00:11:01,416 They look pretty perfect to me. 127 00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:03,166 You can't be trusted with flowers. 128 00:11:03,250 --> 00:11:05,375 You brought white lilies, funeral flowers. 129 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:09,750 -Fuck. -Of course you didn't know. 130 00:11:09,833 --> 00:11:12,958 Apparently you grew up homeschooled in some ditch or something. 131 00:11:15,458 --> 00:11:16,875 Whoa. 132 00:11:19,541 --> 00:11:21,958 -Thanks. -You know, I don't understand you at all. 133 00:11:22,041 --> 00:11:24,166 Who's your maid of honor? What's your walk song? 134 00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:26,000 Do you have anyone to walk you down the aisle? 135 00:11:26,083 --> 00:11:27,583 It's okay, Portia. You really… You… 136 00:11:27,666 --> 00:11:30,791 -You don't have to worry about this. -I do have to worry about it. 137 00:11:30,875 --> 00:11:33,750 Because you're not worried, and someone has to fucking worry. 138 00:11:34,333 --> 00:11:35,166 Okay. 139 00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:41,666 Okay. I will 140 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:44,708 walk myself down the aisle. 141 00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:50,791 I don't know. I don't know what song yet, but I promise you I will… I will pick one. 142 00:11:52,291 --> 00:11:53,125 Okay? 143 00:11:54,541 --> 00:11:56,250 Will you be my maid of honor? 144 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:00,500 Would you do that for me? 145 00:12:02,958 --> 00:12:06,291 The caterer called, and they don't have everyone's final meal choice, so… 146 00:12:06,375 --> 00:12:07,500 Okay. Great. 147 00:12:07,583 --> 00:12:10,916 Then I will ask everyone here what they want. What are the options? 148 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:11,833 Chicken or fish. 149 00:12:11,916 --> 00:12:14,500 -Okay. And veggie option? -I will light you on fire. 150 00:12:22,583 --> 00:12:25,416 Come in. You can help me. 151 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,375 Which do you think best captures… 152 00:12:32,458 --> 00:12:33,291 Oh my God. 153 00:12:33,375 --> 00:12:34,416 …his spirit? 154 00:12:39,708 --> 00:12:41,041 He's so cute. 155 00:12:43,416 --> 00:12:44,583 This one. 156 00:12:45,333 --> 00:12:47,833 Oh! Oh, I don't have one of you. 157 00:12:47,916 --> 00:12:50,541 -Oh, no. Don't worry. That's totally fine. -Mm-mm, mm-mm. 158 00:12:50,625 --> 00:12:52,041 Oh, no, no, no, no. Please. I don't… 159 00:12:52,125 --> 00:12:55,000 I don't want to disturb you. I just wanted to ask you if… 160 00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:56,625 if you wanted 161 00:12:58,166 --> 00:12:59,916 chicken or fish for the wedding? 162 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,875 I want to be buried with my whole family. 163 00:13:14,833 --> 00:13:15,750 Do you want it? 164 00:13:16,291 --> 00:13:19,541 I'm… I'm getting rid of my attachment to all things. 165 00:13:19,625 --> 00:13:21,166 -Thanks. -Mm-hmm. 166 00:13:24,916 --> 00:13:27,166 Do you know where Dr. Cunningham is? 167 00:13:27,250 --> 00:13:30,333 He's probably in his dungeon working on the dog. 168 00:13:31,625 --> 00:13:35,791 Now that he's finished the grave, he needs something else to fixate on. 169 00:13:36,375 --> 00:13:41,375 Oh, and that's all right if that's how he wants to spend his last days with me. 170 00:13:49,083 --> 00:13:50,750 Can I ask you something? 171 00:13:51,791 --> 00:13:53,500 Do you think that everyone 172 00:13:55,166 --> 00:13:57,958 is dealing okay? I mean, with… 173 00:14:00,250 --> 00:14:01,250 …with your death? 174 00:14:02,125 --> 00:14:05,000 Well… …how could they be? I mean… 175 00:14:06,291 --> 00:14:08,666 Well, you know, they could be talking to each other about it. 176 00:14:08,750 --> 00:14:11,083 They could be leaning on each other. 177 00:14:11,166 --> 00:14:13,500 They could be processing it all with you. 178 00:14:16,291 --> 00:14:19,541 There are doulas for these situations, someone who can help you-- 179 00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:21,041 Have you dealt with it? 180 00:14:23,666 --> 00:14:25,208 With what? With your death? 181 00:14:25,291 --> 00:14:27,625 With yours. Your mother's, I mean. 182 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:33,458 My mother died before I knew her. There was nothing left to deal with. 183 00:14:38,625 --> 00:14:39,875 Well, I know that 184 00:14:40,958 --> 00:14:42,708 you grew up without a mother. 185 00:14:43,208 --> 00:14:47,250 But it would be naive to think that just because you didn't know your mother, 186 00:14:47,333 --> 00:14:48,791 you don't have to deal with all this. 187 00:14:48,875 --> 00:14:51,333 It doesn't go away if you close your eyes real tight. 188 00:14:51,416 --> 00:14:56,000 You didn't just suddenly exist. You came from… 189 00:14:57,750 --> 00:15:03,041 somewhere, and when you die, you will leave somewhere behind. 190 00:15:04,250 --> 00:15:06,833 "There was nothing left"? 191 00:15:07,666 --> 00:15:09,083 You are what's left. 192 00:15:15,458 --> 00:15:16,416 I'll have both. 193 00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,083 Chicken and fish. Why not? 194 00:15:44,916 --> 00:15:50,083 Baby, why am I missing you 195 00:15:51,333 --> 00:15:56,083 When I ought to be kissing you? 196 00:15:57,125 --> 00:16:02,500 Tell me our love has just begun 197 00:16:03,916 --> 00:16:08,500 You're my only one… 198 00:16:13,458 --> 00:16:15,583 You shouldn't sleep in the bathtub. 199 00:16:15,666 --> 00:16:17,125 I wasn't sleeping. 200 00:16:17,208 --> 00:16:19,458 I had to give a girl CPR once in college. 201 00:16:19,541 --> 00:16:21,541 I had to give her chest compressions and everything. 202 00:16:21,625 --> 00:16:23,333 Yeah, that is what CPR is. 203 00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:25,000 The girl drowned, Jules. 204 00:16:26,083 --> 00:16:27,000 Guess how. 205 00:16:27,583 --> 00:16:29,458 She fell asleep in the bathtub. 206 00:16:29,541 --> 00:16:31,583 I know. You've told me that before. 207 00:16:31,666 --> 00:16:34,541 I already know everything that's ever happened to you. 208 00:16:35,250 --> 00:16:38,208 Do you wanna know why Rachel thought we were gonna kill her? 209 00:16:38,291 --> 00:16:42,666 I don't know. She's got something fucky going on with her. 210 00:16:42,750 --> 00:16:45,041 I bet you like that, don't you? 211 00:16:47,375 --> 00:16:48,541 Your Sorry Man. 212 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:57,416 Nell, what about me soaking quietly in a bathtub makes you go, 213 00:16:57,500 --> 00:17:02,208 "Let me come in here and stab Jules over and over again with a toothpick 214 00:17:02,291 --> 00:17:03,583 till he bleeds to death." 215 00:17:03,666 --> 00:17:06,083 That's what it's like with you. 216 00:17:06,583 --> 00:17:09,041 Portia's the one who told her about The Sorry Man. 217 00:17:09,125 --> 00:17:11,625 Portia always has to be the center of attention. 218 00:17:11,708 --> 00:17:15,500 Portia's the one who fucked everything up. No one ever blames Portia for anything. 219 00:17:18,583 --> 00:17:19,541 Whatever. 220 00:17:20,583 --> 00:17:21,875 Whatever. 221 00:17:21,958 --> 00:17:23,416 Whatever. 222 00:17:24,208 --> 00:17:28,625 And it's not my fault Nicky gets off on damaged, self-absorbed girls. 223 00:17:29,208 --> 00:17:31,916 He's a simp for girls who walk all over him. 224 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,875 He thinks he's fixing them. 225 00:17:36,416 --> 00:17:38,583 I'm just trying to be at peace. 226 00:17:39,291 --> 00:17:43,333 Why are you disturbing my peace? 227 00:17:44,833 --> 00:17:46,166 It's bath time. 228 00:18:09,916 --> 00:18:11,500 You used to be nicer. 229 00:18:12,125 --> 00:18:15,375 Oh, baby, you want nice? You should have married the other one. 230 00:18:17,833 --> 00:18:20,958 But that's the thing, Nellie. You don't want nice. 231 00:18:21,583 --> 00:18:23,458 Because I hate to break it to you. 232 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:26,416 You're not actually nice either. 233 00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:29,583 And you couldn't stand to watch Nicky take the punches. 234 00:18:29,666 --> 00:18:32,875 You want someone who punches back. It's true. 235 00:18:32,958 --> 00:18:34,708 Sometimes nice is nice. 236 00:18:34,791 --> 00:18:36,291 Well, I'm sometimes nice. 237 00:18:41,875 --> 00:18:42,708 What? 238 00:18:43,583 --> 00:18:44,458 Say it. 239 00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:49,250 Didn't we say that in our vows? That we'd always be honest no matter what? 240 00:18:49,333 --> 00:18:52,250 Oh! We've really stuck to our vows, haven't we? 241 00:18:53,416 --> 00:18:54,250 Say it. 242 00:19:00,458 --> 00:19:01,833 Say it. 243 00:19:05,666 --> 00:19:06,583 Say it. 244 00:19:13,333 --> 00:19:14,250 Say it. 245 00:19:16,916 --> 00:19:17,875 Or drown me. 246 00:19:23,166 --> 00:19:24,083 Drown me. 247 00:19:25,416 --> 00:19:27,666 Yeah. Yeah. 248 00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:32,208 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 249 00:19:37,791 --> 00:19:40,583 Oh, sorry. Oh my God. Oh my God. Sorry. Sorry. 250 00:19:40,666 --> 00:19:43,166 No. Don't go. One moment. 251 00:19:57,375 --> 00:20:00,041 Okay. You want me to say it. 252 00:20:00,708 --> 00:20:02,916 Your mother will be gone in a month, 253 00:20:03,625 --> 00:20:05,208 and you haven't dealt with it. 254 00:20:05,708 --> 00:20:08,166 You've never really dealt with anything, have you? 255 00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:12,750 Not your last failed marriage, not this jealous brother bullshit, 256 00:20:12,833 --> 00:20:15,458 and not your maybe fictitious, maybe real serial killer 257 00:20:15,541 --> 00:20:17,791 who's been haunting you since you were Jude's age, 258 00:20:17,875 --> 00:20:20,458 which is exactly how old you were when you stopped growing up. 259 00:20:21,041 --> 00:20:23,875 You need to deal with your shit, yeah? 260 00:20:24,625 --> 00:20:27,916 Because things will start slipping away all around you. 261 00:20:29,916 --> 00:20:32,083 Are you who you want your son to be, Julian? 262 00:20:35,375 --> 00:20:37,125 Yes! What do you want? 263 00:20:37,208 --> 00:20:40,375 Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. I just… Uh, it's… it's really stupid. 264 00:20:40,458 --> 00:20:41,875 I didn't realize he was in the tub. 265 00:20:41,958 --> 00:20:44,000 That was really nice, what you did with the cake. 266 00:20:44,083 --> 00:20:46,166 Really nice. Nellie likes 'em nice. 267 00:20:46,250 --> 00:20:48,500 Ignore him. It's the key to a healthy marriage. 268 00:20:48,583 --> 00:20:50,416 It's actually stupid. The caterer needs to know 269 00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:52,500 if you guys want chicken or fish for the wedding. 270 00:20:52,583 --> 00:20:53,458 Uh, chicken. 271 00:20:53,541 --> 00:20:55,875 Rachel, have you written your vows? 272 00:20:57,041 --> 00:20:59,708 Uh, no, not yet. I… 273 00:20:59,791 --> 00:21:01,875 -I haven't. -Here's the key to a healthy marriage. 274 00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:09,125 In our vows, Nellie and I promised to always be honest, so I mean it when I say, 275 00:21:09,708 --> 00:21:13,041 "Baby, sometimes I fantasize about hiring someone to kill you." 276 00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:14,666 Oh, babe. 277 00:21:17,375 --> 00:21:21,041 So even in your fantasies, you don't do anything yourself? 278 00:21:27,625 --> 00:21:30,125 What's the fish, and how's the chicken prepared? 279 00:21:30,708 --> 00:21:31,541 I don't know. 280 00:21:31,625 --> 00:21:34,500 You don't know? 'Cause I can't answer until I have all the information. 281 00:21:34,583 --> 00:21:36,750 Don't be a dick. He'll have the fish. 282 00:21:40,250 --> 00:21:42,250 You should really write your vows. 283 00:21:46,291 --> 00:21:47,416 -Sorry. -Sorry. 284 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:52,333 What are you looking at? 285 00:21:52,416 --> 00:21:53,375 What's in here? 286 00:21:54,041 --> 00:21:55,083 Jude. 287 00:21:55,166 --> 00:21:56,458 I got you something. 288 00:21:56,541 --> 00:21:58,375 I think there's someone in here. 289 00:21:58,458 --> 00:22:00,500 -Huh? -I think there's someone in there. 290 00:22:01,458 --> 00:22:03,500 Hey. No, it's okay. 291 00:22:03,583 --> 00:22:06,708 I… I know the feeling, but there's… there's no one back there. 292 00:22:07,583 --> 00:22:09,500 Why would it be locked? 293 00:22:11,291 --> 00:22:12,125 Here. 294 00:22:12,750 --> 00:22:14,083 See? 295 00:22:14,958 --> 00:22:18,625 I don't know, but sometimes it's better not to open a locked door, 296 00:22:18,708 --> 00:22:22,583 because there might be something in there that's not meant for you. Hey, look. 297 00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:25,541 Hey? 298 00:22:26,541 --> 00:22:28,250 Yeah? 299 00:22:28,750 --> 00:22:30,666 I mean, it's not new or nice, 300 00:22:30,750 --> 00:22:34,000 but it was once considered new and nice. So… 301 00:22:34,083 --> 00:22:35,583 Let's go, buddy. 302 00:22:35,666 --> 00:22:36,750 That's something. 303 00:22:48,166 --> 00:22:51,208 She's not thinking clearly because of the brain tumor. 304 00:22:51,291 --> 00:22:52,375 You're giving up? That's it? 305 00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:54,458 -Throw in the towel… -Sorry. 306 00:22:54,541 --> 00:22:59,541 …on a 40-year marriage, on a human life, on Mom's life, on your family. 307 00:22:59,625 --> 00:23:01,750 You're just… you're done. You give up. 308 00:23:01,833 --> 00:23:03,666 I am not giving up, Nicky. 309 00:23:05,708 --> 00:23:09,000 Uh… in my marriage, we make decisions together. 310 00:23:09,666 --> 00:23:12,875 I'm not a witness to your mother's decision. I am a part of it. 311 00:23:12,958 --> 00:23:14,625 I'm standing by my wife. 312 00:23:17,083 --> 00:23:18,875 I'm embracing my last moments with her, 313 00:23:18,958 --> 00:23:21,541 continuing a tradition that was established by her father. 314 00:23:21,625 --> 00:23:22,958 Sorry, by skinning a dog? 315 00:23:23,041 --> 00:23:23,916 Rachel. 316 00:23:30,916 --> 00:23:32,250 You got engaged. 317 00:23:34,958 --> 00:23:35,958 You called us. 318 00:23:36,833 --> 00:23:38,375 You didn't want to have a big wedding. 319 00:23:38,458 --> 00:23:41,208 You just wanted to do something here with the family. 320 00:23:41,791 --> 00:23:43,375 Your mother was happy. 321 00:23:44,166 --> 00:23:45,750 She didn't want to ruin your wedding, 322 00:23:45,833 --> 00:23:48,500 so she planned this for after your wedding. 323 00:23:48,583 --> 00:23:52,708 It is so difficult to get family together, and this is to be her final celebration. 324 00:23:52,791 --> 00:23:55,583 It is, uh… her dying wish. 325 00:23:55,666 --> 00:23:58,416 And you two are not gonna ruin it for her. Understood? 326 00:23:58,500 --> 00:24:01,291 This involves all of us. It's not just her decision. 327 00:24:01,375 --> 00:24:03,958 -Understood?! -Okay, how do I call a family meeting? 328 00:24:05,541 --> 00:24:07,875 -A what? -A family meeting. How do I call one? 329 00:24:07,958 --> 00:24:08,958 Can I do that? 330 00:24:10,833 --> 00:24:13,458 Again, I'm so sorry for my misunderstanding. 331 00:24:13,541 --> 00:24:15,583 And maybe I am totally out of line by doing this, 332 00:24:15,666 --> 00:24:19,041 but I imagine that close families like you 333 00:24:19,125 --> 00:24:22,250 can talk to each other about your feelings. 334 00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:26,500 I know that I'm new to the family dynamic, but I've… I've realized that 335 00:24:26,583 --> 00:24:29,416 it was your plan to use our wedding 336 00:24:29,500 --> 00:24:33,583 as a surrogate living funeral. 337 00:24:33,666 --> 00:24:36,041 But because most of you haven't done much processing, 338 00:24:36,125 --> 00:24:39,375 the wedding has now become a highly pressurized distraction 339 00:24:39,458 --> 00:24:42,333 from what is really going on. 340 00:24:42,958 --> 00:24:48,166 And I think that maybe we should do something about it, or else… 341 00:24:50,083 --> 00:24:52,041 we shouldn't have a wedding at all. 342 00:24:52,750 --> 00:24:54,125 Um, she can't do that. 343 00:24:54,208 --> 00:24:56,291 I knew this would happen. 344 00:24:56,375 --> 00:24:57,541 Just let her talk. 345 00:24:57,625 --> 00:25:00,375 It doesn't make sense to carry on like it's no big deal. 346 00:25:00,458 --> 00:25:03,458 Couching your death inside of our wedding without talking about it, 347 00:25:03,541 --> 00:25:06,125 it's… it's not going to be what you want. 348 00:25:07,291 --> 00:25:10,916 What do you think? Can we do something to process all of this? Can we… 349 00:25:11,708 --> 00:25:12,708 Can we try it? 350 00:25:13,750 --> 00:25:14,583 Yeah. 351 00:25:14,666 --> 00:25:17,625 Yeah, let's, um… let's try it, guys. 352 00:25:17,708 --> 00:25:19,500 I don't understand what she's getting at. 353 00:25:19,583 --> 00:25:23,583 Are you suggesting you cancel the wedding because of our dying mother? 354 00:25:23,666 --> 00:25:25,666 Because that seems a little unfair. 355 00:25:25,750 --> 00:25:27,333 Okay, good. 356 00:25:27,833 --> 00:25:29,833 Uh, no, I'm… I'm not saying that. 357 00:25:29,916 --> 00:25:33,541 I'm saying that I think that we need a forum for you to say what you feel 358 00:25:33,625 --> 00:25:35,541 ahead of the wedding so it's not a disaster 359 00:25:35,625 --> 00:25:38,875 and you can all actually have some peace around it. 360 00:25:38,958 --> 00:25:40,250 I think that was a good start. 361 00:25:40,333 --> 00:25:41,583 -Thank you. -You're welcome. 362 00:25:41,666 --> 00:25:45,833 You want us to do family therapy led by you. 363 00:25:46,833 --> 00:25:48,750 No offense, but a stranger, basically. 364 00:25:48,833 --> 00:25:51,583 Well, isn't that what a therapist is? A stranger? 365 00:25:51,666 --> 00:25:52,958 Are you a therapist? 366 00:25:53,041 --> 00:25:55,541 -She's getting her doctorate. -Oh, in what? 367 00:25:55,625 --> 00:25:57,583 -Behavioral psychology. -You're a therapist? 368 00:25:57,666 --> 00:26:00,166 No, I'm a behavioral psychologist. Uh, almost. 369 00:26:00,750 --> 00:26:03,250 -Have you studied your own behavior? -Jules… 370 00:26:04,750 --> 00:26:06,750 -Be respectful. -I am being respectful. 371 00:26:08,750 --> 00:26:12,666 What… what are we gonna do, Rachel? Sit in a circle and hold hands and cry? 372 00:26:12,750 --> 00:26:16,291 Well, that… that would be better than nothing. Yeah. 373 00:26:16,375 --> 00:26:18,666 Where are you getting your doctorate? 374 00:26:19,875 --> 00:26:20,833 U of I. 375 00:26:20,916 --> 00:26:24,208 -Oh, I went to Northwestern. -Cool. 376 00:26:24,291 --> 00:26:26,208 So is there something you wanna say to your mother 377 00:26:26,291 --> 00:26:28,041 before you no longer have the opportunity to? 378 00:26:29,583 --> 00:26:31,583 Um… Um… 379 00:26:36,458 --> 00:26:37,291 Go ahead. 380 00:26:43,083 --> 00:26:44,208 Uh… 381 00:26:49,416 --> 00:26:50,250 No. 382 00:27:00,208 --> 00:27:01,166 Okay. 383 00:27:07,666 --> 00:27:10,375 So is there anything anyone wants to say to Mrs. Cunningham 384 00:27:10,458 --> 00:27:11,958 before she's no longer with us? 385 00:27:30,708 --> 00:27:35,916 Why don't we… why don't we do this? Why don't we all take some time alone? 386 00:27:37,083 --> 00:27:39,375 Really… really alone. Sit with yourself. 387 00:27:39,458 --> 00:27:43,583 Think about what you want to say or write it down or be prepared to say it. 388 00:27:43,666 --> 00:27:45,708 Do what you need to do, and then we can… 389 00:27:46,375 --> 00:27:48,291 We can all come back together. Yeah? 390 00:27:53,125 --> 00:27:54,583 That was good. Okay. 391 00:27:55,541 --> 00:27:57,291 Nell, can you come with me? 392 00:27:58,125 --> 00:27:59,000 Yeah. 393 00:28:17,750 --> 00:28:19,750 That was more impressive than you realize. 394 00:28:19,833 --> 00:28:24,208 It's not. It's just very obvious that they're failing to cope. 395 00:28:24,291 --> 00:28:26,750 No. I meant stealing the spotlight from Queen V. 396 00:28:26,833 --> 00:28:27,916 I didn't steal it. 397 00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:31,625 Yes. You've only been here two days, and everyone's doing everything you ask. 398 00:28:32,208 --> 00:28:33,041 She's like… 399 00:28:35,125 --> 00:28:37,666 …sort of a narcissist, isn't she? 400 00:28:37,750 --> 00:28:40,541 Sort of? Didn't she just turn your wedding into her funeral? 401 00:28:41,250 --> 00:28:42,916 Right. 402 00:28:44,166 --> 00:28:45,291 Yeah. 403 00:28:47,875 --> 00:28:49,375 What? 404 00:28:50,333 --> 00:28:51,625 You don't take compliments well. 405 00:28:51,708 --> 00:28:53,583 Sorry, what part of that was a compliment? 406 00:28:53,666 --> 00:28:55,750 -The funeral wedding? -When I said you were impressive! 407 00:28:55,833 --> 00:29:00,791 Oh my God, that's… Uh… Who… who does take compliments well? 408 00:29:00,875 --> 00:29:02,333 I take compliments well. 409 00:29:04,250 --> 00:29:05,208 Go ahead. 410 00:29:10,500 --> 00:29:12,291 I don't know, it's, like, kind of a 411 00:29:13,541 --> 00:29:16,166 bad omen to get married during a death ceremony, so… 412 00:29:16,666 --> 00:29:20,583 -Good thing you're not superstitious then. -Yeah, good thing, good thing. 413 00:29:21,291 --> 00:29:23,791 Good thing I haven't had this awful feeling ever since I got here 414 00:29:23,875 --> 00:29:25,250 that something bad is gonna happen. 415 00:29:25,333 --> 00:29:28,416 Yeah, but this is a bad thing, isn't it? Victoria's death. 416 00:29:28,500 --> 00:29:30,625 No, it's… it's something else. 417 00:29:31,333 --> 00:29:34,166 -Okay. -The feeling hasn't… gone away. 418 00:29:35,083 --> 00:29:37,291 I'll keep an eye out for other bad things. 419 00:29:40,375 --> 00:29:41,625 -There's one. -Oh. 420 00:29:49,416 --> 00:29:50,250 What? 421 00:29:50,333 --> 00:29:53,125 I was worried that you'd be, like, an evil bitch who hated me 422 00:29:53,208 --> 00:29:55,333 for marrying your ex, but you're not. So… 423 00:29:55,416 --> 00:29:57,500 Okay. You don't give compliments well either. 424 00:29:57,583 --> 00:29:59,833 -Thank you. -You're welcome. 425 00:30:00,416 --> 00:30:03,416 So what the fuck are we gonna do with this? 426 00:30:05,958 --> 00:30:09,708 Sometimes it's easier to speak truthfully 427 00:30:10,541 --> 00:30:13,250 if you don't have to look someone in the eye. 428 00:30:13,333 --> 00:30:16,583 -So you will talk to that. -Gotta be quiet. They're having a meeting. 429 00:30:18,583 --> 00:30:20,125 You'll each go around 430 00:30:21,125 --> 00:30:22,750 and tell it how you feel, 431 00:30:24,291 --> 00:30:28,416 and it will absorb your pain 432 00:30:30,083 --> 00:30:31,916 and grief, and 433 00:30:33,166 --> 00:30:34,666 then we will release it. 434 00:30:38,125 --> 00:30:38,958 Okay. 435 00:30:39,583 --> 00:30:40,875 Who wants to go first? 436 00:30:41,916 --> 00:30:42,750 I can go. 437 00:30:48,958 --> 00:30:49,875 "Victoria." 438 00:30:52,291 --> 00:30:53,916 "You're an incredible woman." 439 00:30:54,791 --> 00:30:56,458 "You are the Cunningham family, 440 00:30:57,000 --> 00:31:00,958 and you will leave a hole in this family that shouldn't be filled, 441 00:31:01,500 --> 00:31:05,708 not only because it would be impossible but because this is the end of an era 442 00:31:06,541 --> 00:31:08,625 and it should be honored as one." 443 00:31:10,166 --> 00:31:13,166 "Your presence, strength, and unwavering courage 444 00:31:13,250 --> 00:31:16,250 have shaped us in ways we will carry forever." 445 00:31:17,125 --> 00:31:18,000 Um… 446 00:31:20,375 --> 00:31:24,250 I've always, uh, revered you and Dad 447 00:31:26,041 --> 00:31:31,083 and your life together and your marriage 448 00:31:31,166 --> 00:31:36,458 and the way you… devote yourselves to each other. 449 00:31:37,041 --> 00:31:40,083 And I always wanted to follow in your footsteps, 450 00:31:40,166 --> 00:31:42,250 and I hope I'm doing that, 451 00:31:42,333 --> 00:31:45,166 because I see the way that you protect each other, 452 00:31:45,250 --> 00:31:49,875 and you've taught me the value in understanding someone so well 453 00:31:50,750 --> 00:31:52,708 you know how to shield them from pain. 454 00:31:53,208 --> 00:31:56,541 I know we haven't always seen eye to eye. Um… 455 00:31:57,041 --> 00:32:00,041 I hope you love me for my flaws and missteps. 456 00:32:00,125 --> 00:32:04,666 I, uh… I have found a way to love you for yours. 457 00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:08,125 I love you, Mom, and… and I'll miss you. 458 00:32:08,625 --> 00:32:12,333 The time we missed two days in Santorini 459 00:32:12,416 --> 00:32:16,083 because of my failure to admit that I'd been wrong… 460 00:32:20,625 --> 00:32:25,333 and missing your 32nd birthday for an inconsequential business trip. 461 00:32:25,416 --> 00:32:26,541 I am 462 00:32:27,750 --> 00:32:29,416 terribly, terribly sorry. 463 00:32:31,166 --> 00:32:34,291 I will make sure that my future children know you. 464 00:32:35,666 --> 00:32:38,875 I will make sure to keep family traditions alive. 465 00:32:39,875 --> 00:32:42,041 I will take care of Somerhouse. 466 00:32:42,125 --> 00:32:45,125 I will make sure you live on forever in our hearts 467 00:32:46,083 --> 00:32:48,375 and in the hearts of those who knew you. 468 00:32:49,583 --> 00:32:52,750 I know that we only just met, and… 469 00:32:53,708 --> 00:32:55,375 …I'm very sorry to lose you. 470 00:32:57,583 --> 00:33:00,625 You've been such a great mother to Nicky, and, you know, 471 00:33:00,708 --> 00:33:03,583 I think it's… it's true what you said about 472 00:33:05,041 --> 00:33:08,750 children absorbing their mothers and vice versa. 473 00:33:24,750 --> 00:33:26,916 This is the cake Rachel bought to say sorry 474 00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:29,333 for thinking we're a family of murderers. 475 00:33:31,875 --> 00:33:35,000 Nicky is so loving because of you. 476 00:33:35,916 --> 00:33:38,666 And he's so lucky that he had you and Dr. Cunningham 477 00:33:38,750 --> 00:33:40,916 to show him where he came from 478 00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:44,291 and how to love and how to be loved. 479 00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:47,833 Why… why is this door open? 480 00:34:17,958 --> 00:34:20,500 I'm so glad that Nicky absorbed that from you 481 00:34:21,083 --> 00:34:24,583 and that he got to grow up with this unconditional love. 482 00:34:26,333 --> 00:34:28,000 I can't imagine what that's like. 483 00:34:31,916 --> 00:34:34,666 This is where Papa honors the dead animals. 484 00:34:35,250 --> 00:34:37,500 He says the dogs can see.